Bucky Remembering Pre-War Times At Unexpected Moments-
When Steve and Bucky were little kids Bucky's little sister Becca always asked them to play house with her. At which point Becca would always declare Bucky the father (unless she was mad at them but still needed someone to play with, if she was sore at him, she'd tell him he could go ahead and play the dog and stick her tongue out at him). And Dteve would then end up being the mom while Becca and her friends (if Becca had anyone else over) were the kids. Becca's favorite game while playing house was having Steve, Mom, teach her to bake cookies while Bucky, Dad, read the newspaper to them from the kitchen table. Occasionally Becca would beg for Mom and Dad to dance while she sang for them, though they only knew that that particular part of the game could be played when Steve and Bucky were home alone with Becca, babysitting her while Winnifred and Sarah were out shopping together. Their Ma's would never do anything to make them stop from dancing together but... they would look at them, real concerned, their eyes turning big and sad and Steve couldn't ever stand to see it. They both make sure that Becca never asks to play house when Bucky's dad is home though. For her own good and theirs too.
Anyway, once Steve and Bucky re-meet in the 21st century and they begin to take on the mass amount of back-breaking work that is digesting their respective traumas, Nat teases them by asking "who's the girl" because someone in the future will ask so they better have an answer now. Whether it's a quip or a deadpan troll or a lecture. It's a 21st century thing, yes, Nat sighs, a homophobic thing, but also it probably means they don't really know any better too, so even if it's hurtful so they better decide now.
And after she says it, Bucky automatically jerks his thumb in Steve's direction, then, when Natasha reacts to how quickly he does it, smirking, Buckys face goes blank. Confused by himself. Then... Bucky goes stock still, the barest hint of a flush creeps up onto his cheeks as a strange memory plays in his mind, faded and watery.
An apartment. Background noise. Dust bunnies in the air. Steve's face. Steve's face when it was still soft and round with youth. His hands. His hands on Steve's waist. Bucky muttering steps under his breath so Steve will understand. More background noise in the dim room. Laughter. Cheering. A little girl's voice. Becca? His Ma's apartment? Dancing with Steve? Directing Steve to dance with him like he would with a dame?
Steve gently asks him what's up from his side, his hands cradling his bicep gently. Touching. Reaching out.
Bucky just shakes his head. He doesn't know. He just..... recalling the memory, still unable to recall at what point he told Steve he loved him Bucky simply knows that whenever he told him- he should've known sooner. The warm, fluttering feeling in his chest, dancing with Steve as a kid... that's not unlike what he feels today. Just. Softer. Less defined. Less defined by understanding what it is and embracing it rather than shoving it down. Compressing it until he can convince himself it doesn't exist.
Why did the memory come up? What connection does it have to Steve being "the girl" in their relationship?
Oh.
Oh!
Bucky grabs onto understanding tightly before it can disappear like spiders silk through his fingers on a windy day. Blurting out, "do you remember when we'd play house? With Becca? You would be Mom and I would be Dad? Becca our kid?" even though Nat and Steve have continued on with the conversation. Knowing that Bucky will continue to try to unwind his memory on his own. He prefers it this way. As opposed to being pointed out obviously or babied.
And-
Steve bursts out laughing, his amusement radiant and warm, allconsuming as he gets ahold of himself enough to say, "I haven't thought of that in... God, who knows how long-! Yes! Yeah, yeah, I remember, Buck," if before he was radiant, know looking at Steve feels like looking at the sun after a lifetime of pouring rain. It makes his chest hurt. "Becca would make me put on an apron and pretend to cook or clean and you got to sit and tell her stories... I was so jealous! I had to be on my feet while you got to sit! Except, of course, whenever she'd convince you to get up and dance with me. That's why I can slow dance," he laughs shaking his head, "it's a good thing I learned during pretend too, huh? Otherwise I would've heard nothing but ouch, ouch, ouch, stepping on your toes. As is you had to stay in character."
Bucky's chest feels warm. Like in that memory.
Just like it was in that cozy, dim and dust-bunny filled apartment a lifetime and a half ago... love. He's just as in love as he's been for- forever. And he feels it strongly. He's so in love with Steve.
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STUCKY HEADCANON ALERT
Just found out about a thing called "sweetheart grips" they were a thing where men in ww2 would put a picture of a loved one (or pin ups but shh) in the grip of their gun to like keep them close and whatev.
Bucky 1000% had one of teeny Steve in his grip before the little punk came and joined him on the battlefield
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You are the most amazing artist ever, and I’m so grateful you’re taking prompts ❤️ In the spirit of the season - I’d love to see Bucky taking care of prickly, miserable pre-serum Steve when he’s sick. Heaping blankets on him or giving him a torturous sweaty rim job cause “germs come out with the spunk, Stevie, you know that” or just making him soup and cuddling on him or checking his temperature with his lips. Smutty or fluffy, whatever strikes your fancy.
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FAVORITE STUCKY FICS | 60/100
Paper Tree by Ellessey
[Pre-War + Christmas fic, 21 391 words, Explicit]
Summary:
Bucky just laughs and shoves another bite of egg in his mouth, giving Steve a shrug and a full-cheeked smile. He's so damn cute Steve wants to shout at him, but he can't seem to say any of the right things. "Shoulda got you a comb for Christmas," is what he comes up with instead.
"What did you get me?"
It's Steve's turn to shrug now, and if he looks more terrified than cheeky as he does so, he can only hope Bucky doesn't catch it before Steve hurries out the door.
--
On December first, Steve wraps up a letter for Bucky and sets it under their Christmas tree. Now he has twenty-four days left to figure out how to tell Bucky what he wrote, face to face.
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