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#pot roast sandwich
fattributes · 7 months
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Leftover Pot Roast Cheddar Grilled Cheese Sandwich
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morethansalad · 2 years
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Celeriac Monster Pot Roast and Plant-Pushing Cold Cuts (Vegan)
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famewolf · 1 year
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i was so brave and went to the grocery store today for a much needed trip to fill up the pantry. and i only saw three far-r*ght bumper stickers in the parking lot
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rabbitcruiser · 8 days
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Day of the Mushroom
The Day of the Mushroom celebration is celebrated on April 16 and honors all things fungi. The fleshy, spore-bearing fruiting body of a fungus, which can grow anywhere above ground, on soil, or its food source, is known as a mushroom. The white button mushroom, which is grown, is the standard fungus to be called a mushroom. Therefore, fungi with a stem, cap, and gills on the underside of their cap are those to which the term “mushroom” is most frequently applied. The name “mushroom” is also relevant to describing the fleshy fruiting bodies of other Ascomycota because it is used to describe a range of different gilled fungi that may or may not have a stem.
History of Day of the Mushroom
Since they first appeared in early European communities, it is generally assumed that people have been gathering mushrooms since the beginning of time, possibly even in prehistoric times. Truffles and other types of mushrooms were prized in classical Greece and Rome. American author Cynthia Bertelsen claims in her book “Mushroom: A Global History” that both well-known historical authors, Pliny the Elder and Aristotle, wrote about fungus. She also claims that the Roman philosopher Galen wrote several paragraphs on the collection of wild mushrooms. Cynthia Bertelsen goes on to add that it is likely that China and Japan were the first places to cultivate mushrooms as early as 600 A.D.
But it took time for Americans to accept and become accustomed to mushrooms. In the cookbook “The Virginia Housewife,” mushrooms are mentioned for the first time in America (1824). Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup, a classic American staple for casserole recipes, was created in the 1930s. Bertelsen adds that there may be archaeological proof of the spiritual usage of mushrooms as early as 10000 B.C. There is proof that various cultures, including the Ancient Greeks, the Mayans, the Chinese, and the Vikings, among many others, used hallucinogenic mushrooms.
Humans now consume edible mushrooms regularly, which has greatly boosted the agricultural and agro-economic development of the areas where they are grown. Around half of all farmed edible mushrooms are produced in China, which also accounts for six pounds of yearly mushroom consumption per person among the world’s 1.4 billion inhabitants. With an estimated 194,000 tonnes of yearly edible mushroom exports, Poland was the leading exporter of mushrooms in 2014.
Day of the Mushroom timeline
600 A.D.
Earliest Known Cultivation of Mushrooms
Mushrooms are said to have been cultivated as far back in time as 600 A.D. in Japan and China.
1824
The Cookbook “The Virginia Housewife” is Published
The popular American cookbook “The Virginia Housewife” is released.
1966
Cynthia Berthelsen is Born
Berthelsen is born on June 1 and becomes an American author, food expert, and photographer.
2013
“Mushroom: A Global History” is Published
Berthelsen’s book “Mushroom: A Global History” is published.
Day of the Mushroom FAQs
What is Day of the Mushroom?
Day of the Mushroom, celebrated on April 16, is an American holiday created to celebrate the mushroom and its health and ecological benefits.
What are mushrooms?
Mushrooms are the fleshy, spore-bearing fruiting bodies of fungi, which are typically produced anywhere above ground, on soil, or the source of their food.
Are mushrooms edible?
Yes. Some mushrooms taste good and are safe for human consumption.
Day of the Mushroom Activities
Go mushroom hunting: It's a good idea to go mushroom hunting on the Day of the Mushroom. Depending on a variety of variables, you can sometimes find mushrooms in your yard or the woods.
Eat some mushrooms: Consume some mushrooms! When used as culinary garnishing, several edible mushrooms are quite a delicacy and are also nutritious.
Share the fun online: Don't forget to use the hashtag #DayOfTheMushroom to share your mushroom-related fun. Participate in the online discussion.
5 Interesting Facts About Mushrooms
They breathe like humans do: Similar to how humans breathe, mushrooms take in oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide.
Fruiting bodies of mycelium: The fruiting body of the mycelium, not the mushroom, is the primary part.
Mushrooms can be edible: Some mushrooms taste good and are safe for human consumption.
China produces the most mushrooms: In terms of producing edible mushrooms, China leads the world, followed by Japan and then the United States.
Mushroom spores can survive in space: Mushroom spores can survive the radiation and vacuum in space.
Why We Love Day of the Mushroom
Some mushrooms are edible: Some, if not most, mushrooms are edible. That’s just one more source of food for us humans!
Edible mushrooms are tasty: Edible mushrooms are actually tasty as well, and they definitely make a good vegan snack. Go pick some today!
Mushrooms can be healthy: Mushrooms are fungi, and as such, their consumption is healthy. We love this!
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sea-loverr · 7 months
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Pot Roast Dips These cheesy, tender stuffed sandwiches are a family favorite. They are simple to prepare and this recipe yields enough for a large group.
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recapitulation · 2 years
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meal ideas!
low energy ("do not ask me to do any prep work at all, so help me god")
mozzerella cheese wrapped in pepperoni ("pizza tacos"!)
hummus and pretzels or naan (putting the naan in the microwave for like 10 seconds...heavenly)
canned chili (with shredded cheese and sour cream if you have it! boom done!)
instant miso soup (warm and lovely! put tofu in it for protein!)
cheese and cured meat, olives, canned fish, crackers, dried fruit, or whatever easy "charcuterie" type items you like
alternate bites of apple and spoonfulls of peanut butter (mixing honey or chocolate chips to the peanut butter is my favorite)
a "deconstructed sandwich": bites of lunch meat, pickles, cheese, cherry tomato, etc (I love roast beef and white cheddar for this)
yogurt and granola or fruit
put frozen potstickers + frozen edamame in the steamer/rice cooker, chill elsewhere with a timer set, then boom
tortilla chips + canned refried beans + cherry tomatoes + cilantro + jarred salsa con queso (or warm shredded cheese on top of the chips in the microwave for 30 seconds)
bagel + cream cheese + lox
microwave scrambled eggs (add things like green onion, soy sauce, or anything else you like!)
cottage cheese and fruit (mixed together or just on the side)
bowl of shredded rotisserie chicken + buffalo sauce + a bit of mayo + green onion (use a kitchen scissors to cut them right in!)
medium energy ("I'll boil water but don't ask me to chop shit")
boiled eggs and fresh veggies (put a little salt on top of the eggs!)
buttered noodles (my go-to nausea meal, it has never failed me. ideas of things to add: frozen peas, imitation crab, roasted garlic)
baked potato with toppings (I like cheese, bacon, broccoli, green onion, and sour cream)
quesadilla (add some canned beans, cilantro, or avocado!)
pot roast (requires a lot of time but not a lot of actual work. I love it with peas!)
cuban sandwich (bread, swiss, pickle, mustard, ham... my favorite thing to panini-ify by far)
pan-fried tofu with scallion sauce (this sauce goes well with everything and tofu is no exception)
pancakes or waffles! (I love mine with jam)
ham, pickle, and cream cheese roll-ups
fried eggs (with toast and lots of butter...so comforting)
fruit smoothie (bananas, frozen strawberries, yogurt...or whatever!)
I hate salad but could write essays on this copycat olive garden salad (throw it in a bowl! chopping required if you use onion)
spaghetti (controversial maybe but angel hair > spaghetti noodles)
pasta salad (olives broccoli fresh mozerella... those little mini pepperonis... yeah)
stir-fried thai garlic shrimp (I like using the mini frozen salad shrimps, it's easy! use jarred minced garlic to avoid chopping!)
tuna mayo onigiri
slow cooker ribs
buffalo chicken wrap (or any number of other wrap options! shred pre-cooked rotisserie chicken to make it easier)
if your local grocery store sells pre-cooked gyro strips, that can turn into an easy wrap with store-bought pita & tzatziki with tomatoes and onions!
couscous and chickpeas
tortellini + pasta sauce + spinach
high energy ("I don't mind chopping some things up!")
stuffed shells with spinach
chicken and roasted garlic (oh my god.....one of my all time favorites)
beef tacos (I like mine with cilantro and onion, and when I'm feeling especially high energy I love a tomatillo salsa)
chicken alfredo
tom kha gai (a thai soup and my absolute favorite! you just need access to galangal)
lasagna! (freezes well and then boom! low energy meal for later)
pad thai! (not as hard as you'd think, as long as you have access to tamarind paste!)
potstickers! (this is a lovely group activity if you want to cook with housemates!)
rice and beans
bang bang shrimp (ogughfhgfuh I love it. you can also do bang bang tofu!)
minestrone soup (so many nice veggies!)
fried rice (put whatever you have on hand in there! broccoli, peas, carrot, and beef is my favorite combo)
broccoli cheddar soup
spring rolls and peanut sauce
skewers (such as beef, onion, zucchini, bell pepper... you don't need a grill, oven works!)
roasted turkey with garlic parmesean asparagus
pork chop with mashed potatoes
panang curry
chicken gnocchi soup (use store bought gnocchi or make your own if you have a high energy day!)
bibimbap (super customizable depending on what veggies you like best)
butter chicken
plus! things that have helped me meal plan:
whenever you think of a meal you'd like to make, take 3 seconds to google search it, take a screenshot of the image results, and put it in a "food ideas" folder. instant visual menu!
the concept of "meal prepping" makes me recoil but I've learned that it can simply mean preparing shredded chicken, boiled eggs, or some other simple protein that you can customize throughout the week. shredded chicken can turn into wraps, salads, pasta dishes, etc... you don't have to meal prep yourself into the same meal all week!
when I have difficulty working up an appetite, I'll scroll through my favorite restaurant menus! there might be some foods I can't make at home, but many times they're very simple to recreate because the ingredients are literally listed!
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someday i’ll move out and won’t have to eat vegetable soup anymore…
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toruro · 5 months
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— ✧ back to december
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a part of flower me with love ... an hhu unit x flowers collection !
genre: smut (18+ / mdni), fluff, angst (resolved!), best friends to strangers to lovers
description: it's been four months and twenty-two days since you've last talked to mingyu, however your mother still thinks you two are friends. you don't have the heart to tell her what really happened, and now you think it's time for you to move on. (un?)fortunately for you though, mingyu seems to have other plans.
inspired by back to december by taylor swift!
tags: miscommunication, unrequited love (not fr though), big dick mingyu, sex in a car >_<, riding, fingering, pet names (angel, pretty), creampie :3
w/c: 4.3k
a/n: happy birthday @gyuswhore!!! this fic is for em but if not em and ur reading it i hope u enjoy too. this is like 2/3 plot and 1/3 smut if anyone cares
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Normality is bliss.
That’s what you used to tell yourself. That’s what you used to believe.
Normality was bright mornings, crisp air, slow walking down the main street, inhaling the ambrosial scent of freshly roasted coffee beans, and slipping under the fairy lights that hang over the door. It was the warm sound of the overhead bell ringing, permeating laughter in the cafe from all customers, and daisies in a pot by the entrance.
Normality was Mingyu. His bright laugh as you approach the counter, sweet voice as he playfully asks you what drink you’d like, to which you roll your eyes and respond with, “You already know, don’t you?” It was the chuckle he would let out, the wink he flashed at you, murmuring the words, “It’s on the house” (because with Mingyu, it was always on the house), the thanks you give him before stepping back.
Normality was the latte he handed you, rough yet ginger fingers brushing over your palm as he warned you, “Careful, it’s hot,” and the giggle you let out when you stepped back and asked how his morning was going. It was Mingyu telling you nothing special happened yet. It was Mingyu suggesting that you two hang out at the field after he’s done with work. It was you grinning and agreeing in an instant, but only under the condition that he picks you up after your class.
Normality was bliss until four months and twenty-two days ago.
Now, normality hurts like a bitch.
Your mother glances at you from the corner of her vision as you rummage through the fridge. “What’re you looking for?”
“Some bread,” you murmur. “Was really craving a tomato sandwich … Damn, we’re seriously out of white bread?” you ask, giving up with a sigh as you close the door and face her.
She shrugs. “If it’s not in the fridge then I guess so. We’re low on produce too actually … I’d be surprised if you find tomatoes in there too,” she says. You purse your lip, shuffling through the different rows of cabinets to find something to throw together to take for lunch as your mother continues to speak. “You think you could stop by the grocery store after class today and pick up some stuff?”
“Yeah sure,” you reply casually.
“Ah, I wish Mingyu still stopped by with the groceries,” your mother says, and the sudden mention of his name has you halting your movements as you reach for a croissant, before you inhale deeply and go back to doing your own thing.
“Yeah,” you say quietly, clearing your throat after the word comes out horsley.
“You know why he stopped doing that?”
You try not to think about how you still haven’t told your mother that you and Mingyu don’t talk anymore.
“Uhh, I guess uni’s been getting to be a lot of work,” you tell her. “We’re both taking way harder classes so, uh, I guess he doesn’t have the time.”
“Hmm, yeah makes sense. You’re always swamped up in that room of yours ‘cause of work too … haven’t seen you two hang out in a while actually.”
You chew on your lip, staring down at your little bag for lunch and the croissant that sits inside. You wonder if you’ll even have the appetite to eat anything today after this conversation.
“We’re just busy. It’s harder to talk now.” It’s not entirely a lie. Grabbing the bag and picking up your backpack, you turn to face your mother who’s scrolling on her phone. “I’m gonna go now. My first class is starting soon.”
Now, normality is huffing as you get into your car, wishing you had a coffee next to you, but being too full of cowardice to head over to the cafe.
(“Go to a different cafe!” is what common sense would tell you, but common sense doesn’t listen to a love that has been betrayed. No other latte tastes the same, but you know that’s only because no other latte has been made by Mingyu.)
You pick up groceries on the way home.
Now, normality is staring at the daisies that are on display as you walk through the front doors of the store and reminiscing. It’s wondering what once was, and what could have been, if you decided to keep your silly feelings to yourself.
Normality is regretting. Regretting ever opening your mouth and telling Mingyu four months and twenty-two days ago that you loved him, and that you had loved him for not one, not two, not five, but ten damn years, because that was when you two met, and you always loved Kim Mingyu, but you should have known that not once did he love you back. Not how you would’ve wanted anyways.
Normality is wondering. Wondering if Mingyu would still be dropping off groceries if you hadn’t told him that you loved him, if he hadn’t told you he didn’t know what to tell you. Wondering if he thinks of you now. Wondering if he has any regrets. Wondering if he’s okay, but you lost the chance to know the answer to that question four months and twenty-two days ago. Wondering if—
Tomatoes. You need to buy the tomatoes, and the bread, some green beans, spinach, bell pepper, and more cheese, milk, maybe some butter, and—what was it that your mother told you to get? Oh, some strawberries.
You need to get all of these things, but there were no daisies on the list, so how did a bouquet full of them end up in your cart? You tell yourself you picked them up because they’re on sale, but you know the real reason is because you miss Mingyu.
Directing your attention back to the list you were sent on your phone, you hum lowly to yourself as you push your cart through the aisles. Checking items off your notes app, you exist with just yourself, your tomatoes, and fresh daisies as you try and finish these groceries before it gets too late into the evening.
Staring at your screen, you almost don’t notice that the dairy aisle isn’t empty until you bump into someone. “Sorry,” you mutter quickly, “I—” The words get caught in your throat when you see just exactly who you’ve hit.
Averting your gaze quickly, you wonder if Mingyu will respond, but you choose to scurry away quickly instead, because as cowardly as it sounds, you’re not sure if you’re ready to hear his voice again.
You’re not sure why your heart beats so fast when you escape into another aisle. Maybe it’s because you couldn’t read the look on his face for the brief second that your eyes met.
(Ten years of being best friends and you somehow don’t know what he’s thinking. Can four months and twenty-two days really change a person that much? Or did you never know Kim Mingyu in the first place?)
When you get home, your mother asks you where you got the daisies from. You tell her Mingyu gave them to you, because you want to convince her that you two are still best friends, and maybe—just maybe—you’re trying to convince yourself of it too.
You decide to buy a latte five days later. Mingyu never worked the evening shifts, so you’re confident you’ll get one of the other’s as the barista if you walk in past 6pm. Seokmin’s always nice. He doesn’t make the latte’s as sweet as you like—more specifically, as sweet as Mingyu made them—but he’s kind and always cheery.
When you walk in today, the pot by the door is empty. There are no more daisies, and you wonder if this is what has become of normality.
Your eyes glaze over the familiar setting, breathing in the sweet, rusty smell of coffee, and you smile watching all the cafe-goers laugh along with each other in their seats. All is going well, and you’re telling yourself that maybe this new normal isn’t too bad. That you’ve lived with it for four months and twenty-seven days, and so you can live with it longer and—
Your heart plummets when you see who's working the register today.
Maybe you really never knew Kim Mingyu, because you swore he hated the evening shifts, but here he is with a neatly tied apron, smiling while he talks to some girl across the counter. And his toothy grin is so bright and you aren’t sure if you’re seeing things correctly because everything sound has turned to a white rush in your ears and your vision blurs because you are once again awarded the painful reminder that you are in love with Kim Mingyu.
You thought your heart broke right in two back in December, but you hear it crack in this moment and realize that this was the final blow.
There are tears in your eyes, and you don’t know how long you stand there, until you hear your name. Seokmin is calling for you, and when you look up there’s no girl at the counter and it’s just Mingyu and Seokmin staring at you.
And you wonder briefly if you should be glad that Mingyu looks concerned but you don’t have time to dwell on the fact because Seokmin calls for you again—“Hey, are you okay? You—you’re crying”—and fuck, you’ve just humiliated yourself, so with fat tears hitting the dark wood ground you turn on your heel and rush out the door.
You keep thinking and wondering and regretting and you hate it all because regret has become normality, but regret is not a bliss.
You walk down the street, and you keep walking and walking and walking until you realize you forgot where you parked the car but none of that matters because all you’re thinking about is Mingyu’s smile, and how he doesn’t smile at you anymore. And so you walk faster and cry a bit harder until you’re so far down the street you don’t even know where you are anymore but it doesn’t matter because you don’t know who you’ve become.
And there’s footsteps thudding behind you—are you going to get kidnapped now? Fuck, you’ve already had the most horrendous sequence of events that could possibly happen to you in the span of five minutes, and now it’s going to get worse? If this goddamn kidnapper could just target you any other day, then maybe you wouldn’t whip around with tearful eyes, shouting into the dark: “Please don’t kidnap me! I’ll go with you any other day but—Mingyu!?”
His tall figure is hunched over, hands over his thighs as he heaves for breath, craning his neck to look up at you. “Kidnap you? Why in the world would I kidnap you?” he asks through harsh breaths. “Fuck, you walk so fast,” he groans, finally standing up as you furiously wipe your tears away in an attempt to actually make sense of this situation.
“I—” You want to reply, but then it hits you that this is the first time Mingyu has spoken to you in four months and twenty-seven days, and the thought is dizzying. “I don’t know,” you tell him, because you really don’t know. You don’t know a damn thing.
Mingyu looks at you with a look that you, once again, can’t seem to read. “Sorry, I—I wanted to see if you were okay.”
“I’m fine,” you tell him, and anyone would be able to see through the lie but you’re hoping that Mingyu doesn’t pry any further. He doesn’t move, nor does he say anything. “You can, uh, go back now,” you add, rubbing the back of your neck as you stare at the ground. “I’m okay.”
“You—you were crying.”
Opening your mouth to protest, you realize you can’t refute him now. Not when it was so painfully obvious. You choose silence instead, hoping that your apprehension will be enough to drive him away, although it only seems to egg Mingyu on.
You don’t expect the words he blurts out after a few moments of thickness.
“You don’t know how much I wish I could go back to December and change things.”
“Please don’t lie to me Mingyu,” you tell him, and he can just hear from the way you say his name that you are desperately pleading with him. When you finally look up at him with glossy eyes, he wonders how in the world he let things get this far.
“I’m not lying, I—I wouldn’t lie about this.”
“What do you mean by this, Mingyu? What is this?” You cover your face and begin to sob, but not without gasping out words between heavy breaths. “Please don’t do this to me, not again.”
And when you uncover your face and look at him again, he’s got some bewildered look on his face, and you can’t tell what he’s going to say next.
“The girl,” Mingyu starts to say. “That’s my cousin. She was visiting me at work and—”
“It’s not about the girl, Mingyu!” And that’s a bit of a lie because some part of it is about the girl but it’s mainly about you and it’s mainly about Mingyu—mainly about the two of you.
He pinches the bridge of his nose and speaks. “Sorry, I—you’re right.”
Silence once more, before you calm your breaths and shake your head. “You should head back, Mingyu.”
“No I—wait, I just—I’m not lying. I regret everything I did in December.”
“Ming—”
“No, please listen to me. I regret not telling you how I actually felt, but I was so confused,” he tells you, repeating your name. “I was confused and fucking terrified because if things didn’t work out for some reason, then I would’ve lost my best friend but—but I was fucking stupid and lost you anyways. And you know, I wanted to reach out. I wanted to talk to you so bad but then like last week, when I saw you in the grocery store, and—daisies.”
“Daisies?” You furrow your brows.
“Daisies. You had a bouquet of them in your cart,” Mingyu tells you, taking a step forward. “And I know how much you love daisies. Your favorite flowers in the world. I saw them in your cart and thought to myself, fuck, I missed my chance, because I thought you had them for someone else and—”
“They weren’t,” you blurt out. “I-I even told my mom you got me them,” you add bashfully, “because she doesn’t know we stopped … yeah.”
There’s a silence that sits between you two, but you’re starting to realize that silence has become normality and you are no longer content with that.
“Mingyu, do you love me?”
He doesn’t hesitate to respond. “More than you love daisies.”
You laugh through your drying tears. You laugh so hard it makes you cry no longer because of pain but because of happiness, and you shake your head and throw your arms around him. “Kim Mingyu, that is a bold statement.”
“What can I say?” he grins. “I’m a bold man.”
“Where was that bold man for the past four months and twenty-seven days?” you snort.
Mingyu raises a brow. “You’ve been counting?” For a moment your expression falls but then he shakes his head and smiles. “Don’t worry—I’ve been too.”
You two are quick to head back, Mingyu begging Seokmin to hold the first alone for the weekend before taking the wheel of your car and driving you both to your favorite field of daisies.
“Are we going to have sex for the first time in your car?” Mingyu asks with a chuckle, climbing into the backseat from one end while you pile in from the other.
Giggling, you meet his lips for a kiss as soon as the door shuts behind him, arms winding around his thick neck to bring him close. “The way you said that insinuates there we’ll be having more sex after this,” you tell him with a smile before diving back into another tongue twisting kiss.
“Hell yeah,” Mingyu groans against your tongue as you adjust to situate yourself over his lap, hips pressing dangerously close to his. “Gonna fuck you every day if I can. If you can handle that,” he adds.
You roll your eyes, pulling back to help yourself out of the cardigan and shirt you’re wearing. “What makes you think I can’t handle it?”
He only flashes you a toothy grin and quickly glances down at his groin area before winking at you. “You’ll see.”
“Kim Mingyu, you are a little shit,” you conclude despite the way your tummy churns at his insinuation, throwing off your shirt as Mingyu helps you out of a bra.
“I’m not little, that’s for sure … fuck, you’ve got the prettiest tits in the world,” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around your torso to pull you closer so he can plant his lips on the soft flesh. His mouth is warm, tongue tracing constellations over our skin before enclosing one of your nipples with his lips.
Slowly, his tongue traces circles around the stiffened nipple, teeth grazing over it ever so gently before biting down with slight force. “Ah!” you moan out, head thrown back as your hands travel up his neck and into his hair, fisting the thick, dark locks. “‘m sensitive, ‘gyu,” you tell him, shaky-breathed as he pulls his mouth off your tits with a slip popping sound.
“Sorry,” he says with a lazy smile. “Your tits are so nice,” Mingyu murmurs, bringing a hand up to squeeze over your other breast, tweaking the nipple in one hand as your hands begin to play with the hem of his tight fit shirt. “Fuck, can’t believe we didn’t fuck earlier. You know how much time we could’ve saved?” he says, pulling away just for a moment to peel the shirt off his body, revealing his firm, thick torso.
“I wonder whose fault that is?” You roll your eyes.
Mingyu frowns in response. “Don’t remind me … angel, take off your pants. Wanna finger you.”
He doesn’t have to tell you twice, because in an instant your hands are at the waistband of your pants as heat rises to your cheeks upon hearing his words. Just the thought of Mingyu’s thick, longer fingers inside your aching cunt is enough for it to pulse around nothing as you throw your pants to the side and shove your panties to reveal your core.
“Atta girl,”  he murmurs under his breath as you readjust yourself over his lap so that he can have better access between your legs. Slowly, he brings one hand up to your exposed cunt, bringing his middle finger to circle around your gaping hole. “Shit, you’re so wet, angel … so wet for me.”
“Just for you ‘gyu, just for you” you gasp out when he sinks one finger in, rough pads rubbing against your warm, gummy walls.
Now Mingyu occasionally entertains the outrageous idea that he’s well composed, but he’d be a fool to deny that, even though he can turn you to mush in the palm of his hand, you also have him wrapped around your little finger.
You only have to beg him once or twice for a second finger before he’s giving in, wanting nothing more than to spoil you until you can’t even remember what you were asking for in the first place. And naturally, when you finally tell him that you’re ready for more—ready for his cock—he can’t help but grin and comply.
“You think you’re ready?” he asks, slipping his fingers out and shoving them into your mouth so you can taste yourself.
“You think I’m not?” you mumble around his fingers. You pout a little and Mingyu chuckles, leaning in to give you a wet and sloppy kiss before lifting his hips a little.
“You’ll see angel … help me take this all off,” he tells you, and you’re quick to grab at his waistband and yank his pants and boxers down at the same time.
“What are you talking ab—oh.” The words dry on your tongue when you see his cock spring out, from underneath his boxers, the thickness slapping against Mingyu’s abdomen.
It’s fat and long and veiny in all the right places, heavy balls resting at the base of it, the reddish-pink tip smeared all over with his shiny, translucent white precum.
“Yeah,” Mingyu says with yet another chuckle, watching your face as you gaze down at his cock in awe.
“I-is it gonna fit?” you ask incredulously, eyes glancing back and forth between the smirk on Mingyu’s lips and the long length of his cock. Mingyu just shrugs and smooths his hands over your hips, your stomach, and then your neck, pulling you into a deep kiss.
Your stomach flutters, cunt growing more and more needy and wet as the seconds tick by, and the way Mingyu’s tongue flicks against yours only heightens the feeling. When he pulls away, he settles his hands over your waist and directs you right over his cock, and something in you swells with pure arousal with the next words he says.
“Don’t worry angel, I’ll make it fit. You trust me?”
“Yeah,” you breath out, steadying your position as Mingyu uses one hand to guide his heavy length so that the tip points upwards and presses right against you.
“Fuck yeah,” he hisses, and you moan as you feel him sliding against your folds in a slippery, sticky mess. “old onto me, yeah angel? If you want to stop just—”
“Say the word,” you finish for him, placing your hands on Mingyu’s bare shoulders as an attempt to steady yourself, breath hitching as his length pushes into your entrance. “Oh shit, ‘gyu!" you cry out as you begin to sink down on him.
Tears pricking at the corners of your eyes—you can’t even fathom how, even after all his prep, Mingyu still feels like he’s nearly splitting you in half.
“Fuck, pretty—you’re so fucking tight,” Mingyu grunts, helping you nearly impale yourself on his cock. “Fucking fitting inside you so well,” he praises as he bottoms out inside of you, letting your forehead fall to his shoulder as you take deep breath.
Mingyu knows he’s big—knows it’s hard to fit him inside of you—and he’s feels so fucking lucky that he has you—so willing to take all that he’s giving—sucking him in and whining for more. He waits a few moments, only listening to the way your heavy breaths start to grow lighter, until you’re whimpering a soft, “‘gyu.”
He wastes no time in jerking his hips upward, shifting inside of you and battering the inside of your soft walls. You bite down on his shoulder as you push your hips down to meet his thrusts, choking back soft sobs as you feel his cock kiss your cervix with each movement.
“Holy shit,” Mingyu grunts as you begin to bounce on his lap, his length slipping out of you halfway before being plunged right back in with a sopping mess growing on his thighs.
You whine loudly at the overwhelming pleasure that takes over your body, lifting your head up so you could look at Mingyu with your mouth agape and hair stuck all over your burning face, a sheer layer of sweat starting to envelope both your bodies.
Soon, both of your movements begin to grow erratic and sloppy, hips jamming into each other so hard you’d be surprised if you even have the ability to walk tomorrow. You now know why Mingyu was concerned about fucking every day.
“You g’na cum soon pretty? Cum all over my cock? I can feel it angel, can feel your pretty cunt squeezing me.”
“Fuck, Mingyu,” you manage to gasp out, “Yeah, ’m gonna cum—feels so good, so full, so—fuck!”
Mingyu’s cock pulses inside of you and that’s when every detail seems to be heightened to a thousand—as your orgasm racks through you, you seem to feel every curve, every vein, dragging in and out of you to such detail that it has your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you scream out his name.
Mingyu watches you fall apart, surrendering to bliss, and the way your hips are sporadically swiveling over his, your pussy’s wetness coating and creaming his cock has him going into a frenzy. Frantically, he begins to snap his hips faster up into you, your soft moans of overstimulation pushing him to his end faster than he can ever imagine. Watching the way he slides in and out of you is enough to have him cumming, shooting his hot, sticky load inside your warm cunt.
Riding out the last of his orgasm with soft rolls of his hips, Mingyu sighs contently at the feeling of you milking him dry, the both of you looking down at the wet, dirty mess you’ve made where the two of you connect, his cock still throbbing inside of you.
Both of you finally look up at the same time, grinning at each other, and you flop forward resting your head on his chest as he slowly combs his fingers through your hair, other hand running up and down your back.
“Why’d you start working the evening shifts?” you ask Mingyu after your breath has finally leveled. “I thought you hated those.”
“I did, but you stopped coming in the mornings, and I figured it was because of me. I hoped that maybe you would start coming in the evenings so I asked my boss to change my regular shifts just in case.”
“Oh wow, you really do love me.”
“I already told you I do! Even more than you love daisies, remember?”
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incorrectbatfam · 1 year
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Alfred's out for the day and the batfam pack their own lunches
Dick: Bruce's leftovers
Jason: an entire pot roast
Tim: a venti espresso and last week's pizza crust
Damian: "Mother, I require sustenance"
Duke: the most average ham sandwich
Cullen: Doritos and Mountain Dew
Stephanie: if you think it's waffles you're absolutely right
Cassandra: the souls of the innocent a bagel nooo two bagels
Barbara: three different thermoses of soup
Harper: ramen trail mix
Carrie: loose pocket Skittles
Kate: grabs takeout on her break
Alfred: afternoon tea with his old spy friends
Selina: wedding food tasting with Harley and Ivy
Bruce: Uber Eats because someone took his leftovers
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obeythebutler · 8 months
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Hi! I'm new to your blog so I apologize if I mess anything up.
Could I request MC surprising the brothers with a feast they accidentally cooked up because they were worried that there worried that their wouldn't be enough food for the brothers?
It's 7:30am and his brother still aren't ready for RAD.
Hell, they haven't even stepped down for breakfast. Even Beel, never the one to miss it is missing.
Did all his brothers decide to skip today's classes? Were they orchestrating some other useless prank?
Lucifer stares at his watch, waiting. If they don't come down in the next five minutes he's going to leave them at home and give them detention. Maybe he'll have to pull Mammon out of his bed again, or carry Belphegor down the stairs.
The thought of dragging his brothers like sacks of potatoes down the stairs makes his head ache. It’s always been like this, him caving in so easily to his brothers demands, being so lax on them.
The saving grace is the human exchange student.
MC.
They're on breakfast duty today, and Lucifer can smell the pleasant hint of roasted hellfire mushrooms. Cinnamon too. They've always been a diligent person when it comes to their work.
Unlike his brothers.
Sigh.
"If you all don't hurry up, the food is going to get cold!" Their voice rings from the kitchen, and Lucifer opens his mouth to give one last reprimand to his brothers, to hurry up and come down before he drags them.
There's a blur besides him then, a flurry of moment that messes up his perfectly styled hair.
"Food cooked by the human! I call dibs on it, I'm the great Mammon after all!"
The eldest gawks at his brother, perhaps in disbelief or surprise, and then fixes his hair in resignation. Whatever makes him be on time, his scoldings or MC's voice.
Lucifer rolls his shoulders, steps forward to get into the dining hall instead of the hallway, but then he senses footsteps on the stairs. Five pairs of shoes, each distinguishable from the other.
His brothers are a blur as they surpass him to get to the dining hall.
What the—
At this point, all the man can do is to slap his palm on his forehead.
They won't listen to him, but they'll willingly rush to the dining hall when MC calls, huh? For the sake of hell and everything that is corrupted, they're such simps that its intolerable to watch.
As soon as he steps in though, Lucifer is rendered speechless by the sight in front of him. So are the brothers.
There's just.....so many plates of food. Creamed Bonnacon, Devil Zebra Bacon Sandwich, Hell Pancakes, and that doesn't even cover it. Blood Strawberries, Caramel Shadow Tart, Ghost Watermelon....It's a feast fit for a banquet, and it must have taken so much time to cook all that...
"T-That's......that's just like that anime! Where the main character cooks up a feast for their roommates because they didn't want them to go hungry so they woke up at the crack of—"
"Shut yer mouth Levi." Mammon says, although there is no irritation in his tone as he gapes at the dining table. He can spot some of his favorite foods, given that there are plates and plates of them. He mentioned some of his favorite things to eat to MC long time back, but he didn't think that they would remember.
The fourth-born has a smile on his face now, as he stares at the cat drawn on his pancake with blueberry syrup. It's so cute.
He remembers MC placing some pots and utensils on the table the night before, stating that it would be less time-consuming in mornings given the rush.
His cheeks feel hot.
"Now, darling, that is quite a feast you have cooked up for us!" Asmodeus hangs behind MC's shoulder as he compliments them. There is still flour on their cheeks, and so he wipes it away from them using his thumb, earning squawks of protest from both Levi and Mammon. "Thank you so much! This is soo going on Devilgram!"
"I thought the usual wouldn't be enough," They mumble, nervously shifting their gaze from the brothers to the table. Asmo's weight on their shoulders is a comfortable one, yet the intense scrutiny they are subjected to makes them want to hide away. "Next thing I knew was that I kept adding and adding ingredients until I realised what I did. So you better finish it all."
Belphegor giggles. "That won't be a problem." He can sense his twin's growing hunger at the sight of the feast before him, and food does taste better when cooked by your loved ones. The demon is glad that he chose to be on time today.
Wait, Beel was right besides him, he isn't here....
"Woah—" MC can only stumble out the words as they are caught off guard when pulled into a hug by the sixth born. He's tall, and so warm. "Easy there!"
"Thank you MC!" Beel's voice is full of happiness, and he can't help but hug them for it. He knows his gluttony is a lot to handle, and it causes a lot of trouble for others, but them going out of their way to make extra efforts and ensuring that he and his brothers won't go hungry makes him feel loved.
He'll wait this time, to eat with MC.
"At what time did you wake up to cook all of this?"
You turn your head towards Satan, who is now besides you. Gazing at you ever so softly. "I woke up around three, couldn't sleep since I had drunk a lot of coffee the night before."
"Your sleep schedule will be messed up if you continue," He reprimands you, but his tone is light.
"Thank you for ensuring that we all don't go hungry though." Lucifer smiles as he says that.
Maybe this is what home is.
You and the brothers, cooking too much and enjoying it nevertheless. Casual conversation drifting across the table, with Hell coffee as bitter as ever, packing some for Purgatory Hall residents and leaving together for RAD as the gates to the house close behind you all in remembrance.
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lsdoiphin · 4 months
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Foods of Vestur
@broncoburro and @chocodile provoked me into doing some illustrated worldbuilding for Forever Gold ( @forevergoldgame ), an endeavor I was happy to undertake. Unbeknownst to me, it would take the better part of a week to draw.
In the process, I conjured about an essay's worth of fantasy food worldbuilding, but I'm going to try and keep things digestible (pardon my pun). Lore under the cut:
The Middle Kingdom
The Middle Kingdom has ample land, and its soil, landscapes, and temperate climate are amenable to growing a variety of crops and raising large quantities of livestock. The Midland palate prefers fresh ingredients with minimal seasoning; if a dish requires a strong taste, a cook is more likely to reach for a sharp cheese than they are to open their spice drawer. Detractors of Middle Kingdom cuisine describe it as bland, but its flavor relies on the quality of its components more than anything.
KEY CROPS: wheat, potatoes, carrots, green beans, apples, pears, and grapes KEY LIVESTOCK: Midland goats, fowl, and hogs
ROAST FOWL: Cheap and easy to raise, fowl is eaten all over Vestur and by all classes. Roasted whole birds are common throughout, but the Middle Kingdom's approach to preparation is notable for their squeamish insistence on removing the head and neck before roasting, even among poorer families. Fowl is usually roasted on a bed of root vegetables and shallots and served alongside gravy and green beans.
GOAT RIBEYE: Vestur does not have cattle – instead it has a widely diversified array of goats, the most prominent being the Middle Kingdom's own Midland goat. The Midland goat is a huge caprid that fills the same niche as cattle, supplying Vestur with meat and dairy products. Chevon from the Midland goat is tender with a texture much like beef, though it retains a gamier, “goat-ier” taste. It is largely eaten by the wealthy, though the tougher and cheaper cuts can be found in the kitchens of the working class. Either way, it is almost always served with gravy. (You may be sensing a pattern already here. Midlanders love their gravy.)
FETTUCCINE WITH CHEESE: Noodles were brought to the Middle Kingdom through trade with the South and gained popularity as a novel alternative to bread. The pasta of Midland Vestur is largely eaten with butter or cream sauce; tomato or pesto sauces are seldom seen.
CHARCUTERIE WITH WINE: Charcuterie is eaten for the joy of flavors rather than to satiate hunger, and therefore it is mainly eaten by the upper class. It is commonly eaten alongside grape wine, a prestigious alcohol uniquely produced by the Middle Kingdom. The flavor of grape wine is said to be more agreeable than the other wines in Vestur, though Southern pineapple wine has its share of defenders.
BREAD WITH JAM AND PRESERVES, TEA SANDWICHES, & ROSETTE CAKE: Breads and pastries are big in the Middle Kingdom. The Middle Kingdom considers itself the world leader in the art of baking. Compared to its neighbors, the baked goods they make are soft, light, and airy and they are proud of it. Cakes in particular are a point of ego and a minor source of mania among nobility; it is a well-established cultural joke that a Middle Kingdom noble cannot suffer his neighbor serving a bigger, taller cake. The cakes at Middle Kingdom parties can reach nauseatingly wasteful and absurdist heights, and there is no sign of this trend relenting any time soon.
CHOWDER, FARMER'S POT PIE, GRIDDLECAKES, EGGS, CURED MEATS: If you have the means to eat at all in the Middle Kingdom, you are probably eating well. Due to the Midland's agricultural strength, even peasant dishes are dense and filling. Eggs and cured meats are abundant, cheaper, and more shelf stable than fresh cuts and provide reprieve from the unending wheat and dairy in the Midland diet.
STEWED APPLES AND PEARS, JAM AND PRESERVES: The Midland grows a number of different fruits, with apples and pears being the most plentiful. In a good year, there will be more fruit than anyone knows what to do with, and so jams and preserves are widely available. Stewed fruit has also gained popularity, especially since trade with the Southern Kingdom ensures a stable supply of sugar and cinnamon.
NORTHERN KINGDOM - SETTLED
The Northern Kingdom is a harsh and unforgiving land. Historically, its peoples lived a nomadic life, but since the unification of the Tri-Kingdom more and more of the Northern population have opted to live a settled life. The “settled North” leads a hard life trying to make agriculture work on the tundra, but it is possible with the help of green meur. The Northern palate leans heavily on preserved and fermented foods as well as the heat from the native tundra peppers. Outsiders often have a hard time stomaching the salt, tang, and spice of Northern cuisine and it is widely considered “scary.”
KEY CROPS: potatoes, beets, carrots, tundra pepper KEY LIVESTOCK: wooly goats, hares*
GOAT POT ROAST: Life up north is hard work and there is much to be done in a day. Thus, slow cooked one-pot meals that simmer throughout the day are quite common.
VENISON WITH PICKLES: Game meat appears in Northern dishes about as much as farmed meat – or sometimes even more, depending on the location. Even “classier” Northern dishes will sometimes choose game meat over domesticated, as is the case with the beloved venison with pickles. Cuts of brined venison are spread over a bed of butter-fried potato slices and potent, spicy pickled peppers and onions. The potatoes are meant to cut some of the saltiness of the dish, but... most foreigners just say it tastes like salt, vinegar, and burning.
MINER STEW: While outsiders often have a hard time distinguishing miner stew from the multitude of beet-tinged stews and pot roasts, the taste difference is unmistakable. Miner's stew is a poverty meal consisting of pickles and salt pork and whatever else is might be edible and available. The end result is a sad bowl of scraps that tastes like salt and reeks of vinegar. The popular myth is that the dish got its name because the Northern poor began putting actual rocks in it to fill out the meal, which... probably never happened, but facts aren't going to stop people from repeating punchy myths.
RYE TOAST WITH ONION JAM: Rye is hardier than wheat, and so rye bread is the most common variety in the North. Compared to Midland bread, Northern bread is dense and gritty. It is less likely to be enjoyed on its own than Midland bread, both because of its composition and because there's less to put on it. Unless you've the money to import fruit spreads from further south, you're stuck with Northern jams such as onion or pepper jam. Both have their appreciators, but bear little resemblance to the fruit and berry preserves available elsewhere in Vestur.
HARE DAIRY: Eating hare meat is prohibited in polite society due to its association with the haretouched and heretical nomadic folk religions, but hare dairy is fair game. Hare cheese ranges from black to plum in color, is strangely odorless, and has a pungent flavor akin to a strong blue cheese. It is the least contentious of hare milk products. Hare milk, on the other hand, is mildly toxic. If one is not acclimated to hare milk, drinking it will likely make them “milk sick” and induce vomiting. It is rarely drunk raw, and is instead fermented into an alcoholic drink similar to kumis.
MAPLE HARES AND NOMAD CANDY: Maple syrup is essentially the only local sweetener available in the North, and so it is the primary flavor of every Northern dessert. Simple maple candies are the most common type of sweet, though candied tundra peppers – known as “nomad candy” – is quite popular as well. (Despite its name, nomad candy is an invention of the settled North and was never made by nomads.)
TUNSUKH: Tunsukh is one of the few traditions from the nomadic era still widely (and openly) practiced among Northern nobility. It is a ceremonial dinner meant as a test of strength and endurance between political leaders: a brutally spiced multi-course meal, with each course being more painful than the last. Whoever finishes the dinner with a stoic, tear-streaked face triumphs; anyone who cries out in pain or reaches for a glass of milk admits defeat. “Dessert” consists of a bowl of plain, boiled potatoes. After the onslaught of tunsukh, it is sweeter than any cake.
NORTHERN KINGDOM – NOMADIC NORTH
Although the Old Ways are in decline, the nomadic clans still live in the far North beyond any land worth settling. They travel on hareback across the frozen wasteland seeking “meur fonts” - paradoxical bursts of meur that erupt from the ice and provide momentary reprieve from the harsh environment. The taste of nomad food is not well documented.
KEY CROPS: N/A KEY LIVESTOCK: hares
PEMMICAN: Nomadic life offers few guarantees. With its caloric density and functionally indefinite “shelf life,” pemmican is about as close as one can get.
SEAL, MOOSE: Meat comprises the vast majority of the nomadic diet and is eaten a variety of ways. Depending on the clan, season, and availability of meur fonts, meat may be cooked, smoked, turned to jerky, or eaten raw. Moose and seal are the most common sources of meat, but each comes with its own challenges. Moose are massive, violent creatures and dangerous to take down even with the aid of hares; seals are slippery to hunt and only live along the coasts.
WANDER FOOD, WANDER STEW: When a green meur font appears, a lush jungle springs forth around it. The heat from red meur fonts may melt ice and create opportunities for fishing where there weren't before. Any food obtained from a font is known as “wander food.” Wander food is both familiar and alien; the nomads have lived by fonts long enough to know what is edible and what is not, but they may not know the common names or preparation methods for the food they find. Fish is simple enough to cook, but produce is less predictable. Meur fonts are temporary, and it's not guaranteed that you'll ever find the same produce twice - there is little room to experiment and learn. As a result, a lot of wander food is simply thrown into a pot and boiled into “wander stew,” an indescribable dish which is different each time.
CENVAVESH: When a haretouched person dies, their hare is gripped with the insatiable compulsion to eat its former companion... therefore, it is only proper to return the favor. Barring injury or illness, a bonded hare will almost always outlive its bonded human, and so the death of one's hare is considered a great tragedy among nomads. The haretouched – and anyone they may invite to join them – sits beside the head of their hare as they consume as much of its rib and organ meat as they can. Meanwhile, the rest of the clan processes the remainder of the hare's carcass so that none of it goes to waste. It is a somber affair that is treated with the same gravity as the passing of a human. Cenvavesh is outlawed as a pagan practice in the settled North.
HARE WINE: While fermented hare's milk is already alcoholic, further fermentation turns it into a vivid hallucinogen. This “hare wine” is used in a number of nomad rituals, most notably during coming of age ceremonies. Allegedly, it bestows its drinker with a hare's intuition and keen sense of direction... of course, truth is difficult to distinguish from fiction when it comes to the Old Ways.
SOUTHERN KINGDOM
The Southern Kingdom is mainly comprised of coast, wetland, and ever-shrinking jungle. While the land is mostly unfit for large-scale agriculture, seafood is plentiful and the hot climate is perfect for exorbitant niche crops. What they can't grow, they obtain easily through trade. Southerners have a reputation for eating anything, as well as stealing dishes from other cultures and “ruining” them with their own interpretations. KEY CROPS: plantains, sweet potato, pineapple, mango, guava, sugarcane KEY LIVESTOCK: fowl, marsh hogs, seals
GLAZED EEL WITH FRIED PLANTAINS: A very common configuration for Southern food is a glazed meat paired with a fried vegetable. It almost doesn't matter which meat and which vegetable it is – they love their fried food and they love their sweet and salty sauces in the South. Eel is a culturally beloved meat, much to the shock and confusion of visiting Midlanders.
NARWHAL STEW: Narwhal stew is the South's “anything goes” stew. It does not actually contain narwhal meat, as they are extinct (though the upper class may include dolphin meat as a protein) – instead, the name comes from its traditional status as a “forever soup,” as narwhals are associated with the passage of time in Southern culture. Even in the present day, Southern monasteries tend massive, ever-boiling pots of perpetual stew in order to feed the monks and sybils who live there. Narwhal stew has a clear kelp-based broth and usually contains shellfish. Beyond that, its ingredients are extremely varied. Noodles are a popular but recent addition.
FORAGE: The dish known as “forage” is likewise not foraged, or at least, it hasn't been forage-based in a good hundred years at least. Forage is a lot like poke; it's a little bit of everything thrown into a bowl. Common ingredients include fish (raw or cooked), seaweed, fried noodles, marinated egg, and small quantities of fruit.
HOT POT: Hot pot is extremely popular, across class barriers, in both the South proper and its enclave territories. This is due to its extreme flexibility - if it can be cooked in a vat of boiling broth, it will be. Crustaceans and shellfish are common choices for hot pot in the proper South, along with squid, octopus, mushrooms, and greens.
FLATBREAD: The Southern Kingdom doesn't do much baking. The vast majority of breads are fried, unleavened flatbreads, which are usually eaten alongside soups or as wraps. Wraps come in both savory and sweet varieties; savory wraps are usually stuffed with shredded pork and greens while sweet wraps – which are much more expensive – are filled with fruit and seal cheese.
GRILLED SKEWERS, ROAST SWEET POTATO: While a novel concept for Midlanders and Northerners, street food has long been a part of Southern Kingdom culture. You would be hard pressed to find a Southern market that didn't have at least three vendors pushing grilled or fried something or other. Skewers are the most common and come in countless configurations, but roast sweet potatoes are a close second.
CUT FRUIT AND SEAL CHEESE: Fresh fruit is popular in the South, both local and imported. While delicious on its own, Southerners famously pair it with seal cheese. Which leads me to an important topic of discussion I don't have room for anywhere else...
THE SOUTH AND CHEESE: Since the South doesn't have much in the way of dairy farming, cheese is somewhat rare in their cuisine – but it is present. And important. Cheese is the domain of the Church. Common goat dairy imported from the Middle Kingdom is turned to cheese by monks in Southern monasteries and sold to the Southern public, yes, but as you have noticed there is another cheese prominent in the Southern Kingdom diet: seal cheese. Seal cheese is unlike anything else that has ever been called cheese; the closest it can be compared to is mascarpone. It is is a soft, creamy cheese with a mild flavor and an indulgent fat content. It is used almost exclusively as a dessert, though it is only ever mildly sweetened if at all. It is extremely costly and held in high regard; the most religious Southerners regard it as holy. Dairy seals are a very rare animal and raised exclusively in a small number of Cetolist-Cerostian monasteries, where they are tended and milked by the monks. Due to their status as a holy animal, eating seal meat is forbidden. Eating their cheese and rendering their tallow into soap is fine though.
(HEARTLAND SOUTH) SOUTH-STYLE GOAT: The Heartland South is a Southern enclave territory in the Middle Kingdom. Visiting Midland dignitaries oft wrongly assume that because the Heartland South is in Middle Kingdom territory, Heartland Southerners eat the same food they do exactly as they do. They are horrified to find that familiar sounding dishes like “goat with potatoes” are completely and utterly unrecognizable, drenched in unfamiliar sauces and spices and served alongside fruit they've never eaten. Meanwhile, Heartland Southerners firmly believe that they have fixed the Middle Kingdom's boring food.
(BOREAL SOUTH) “TUNSUKH”: If Midlanders are afraid of Heartland Southern food, Northerners are absolutely furious about cuisine from the Boreal South - the most legendarily offensive being the Boreal South's idea of “tunsukh.” Southerners are no stranger to spice, so when Southern traders began interacting with the North, they liked tunsukh! It's just... they thought it needed a little Southern help to become a real meal, you know? A side of seal cheese soothed the burn and made the meal enjoyable. And because the meal was enjoyable, the portion sizes increased. And plain boiled potatoes? Well, those are a little too plain – creamy mashed sweet potato feels like more of a dessert, doesn't it? ...For some reason, Northerners didn't agree, but that's okay. The Boreal South knows they're just embarrassed they didn't think of pairing seal cheese with tunsukh sooner.
ARMY RATIONS
The food eaten by the King's Army is about what you would expect for late 1700s military; salt pork or salt chevon, hard tack, and coffee. The biggest divergence they have is also one of Vestur's biggest points of pride: they have the means to supply their troops with frivolous luxuries like small tins of candied fruit from the Midland. A love of candied fruit is essentially a Vesturian military proto-meme; proof that they serve the greatest Tri-Kingdom on the planet. Don't get between a military man and his candied fruit unless you want a fight.
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houseswife · 3 months
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listen I honestly think wilson really enjoyed that little arc where he was cooking every single one of house’s meals. I know he’s house’s main source of food anyway but usually just via ‘stolen’/bought lunch at work. I’m talking about when they lived together in season 2 and his ass made macadamia nut pancakes for breakfast on a WEEKDAY. and pot roast for dinner. so much effort and for what…because house was gobbling that shit up…? yes he complained about it every time but he also had an extra fork on hand when house came home to stuffed peppers. it feeds into his need to be needed complex. the intimate dependency of someone relying on you for sustenance. also why they used food as the metaphor for why house was craving his presence. this is what I mean when I say that wilson deserved a housewife era. house went stir crazy within like 12 seconds of doing all their chores because he requires Stimulation™️ but I’m completely convinced that it would act as enrichment for wilson. if I told him to go make me a sandwich he’d roll his eyes and then passive aggressively make a delicious one. actually that literally happened in son of a coma guy. case closed
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scarlovebot · 10 months
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FRUIT AND VEGETABLES
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Natasha romanoff x female reader
Summary: You burn your tongue on something hot, Natasha knows how to help.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧
“Son of a bitch” slurping the remainder of your food whilst mumbling in pain.
you had been told that your eating habits were childlike: refusal to eat anything that a bunny rabbit would, no crusts on your sandwiches, hangry and lastly, you don’t think before you actually eat.
So this is how you ended up with another sore tongue, the ramen that let off boiling hot steam now sat in front of you ever so appealing - considering the fact it was now 70% saliva due to spitting the food back inside because of the mouth burning heat.
You see, Wanda loves to cook, it’s her favourite hobby and pass time which is great for everyone - except for you.
The young witch whips up different dishes daily which look and smell divine however yourself, isn’t allowed any.
It’s a rule that fruit and vegetables have to be eaten with each meal yet you couldn’t possibly put such devilish things inside your mouth, you were not going to even try. they turned your stomach upside down, how could anyone eat what the creatures that live on the floor eat??? It was beyond you.
So now it had become a rule and punishment that if the vitamins and minerals remain on your plate, you would no longer be allowed to eat ANY of Wandas meals (this even included dessert, yes apple pie was a big no no).
if you wanted to act like a child you were going to get treated like one.
Therefore, this is how you ended up with a burnt tongue. Instant ramen sounded much more delicious than Wandas English inspired roast dinner anyway, or so you told yourself.
You weren’t totally excluded at meal times, although eating different foods from everyone else you were still welcomed at the dining room table. Now nine times out of ten you would happily sit there, in between the chef herself and your girlfriend Natasha.
Yet today was different, you felt angry towards the group because the dessert of the evening had changed. Originally it was a vanilla cheesecake without a piece of fruit in sight, yet you later found out and only a couple hours before dinner service that the menu had changed to a pineapple upside down cake. Absolutely not you thought.
Since being told that horrendous news you made it known of your annoyance towards everyone. Rolling your eyes at any noise that came out of their two faced mouths, purposely shoving into their shoulders when they were a few inches away and the cherry on top of it all, hogging the television which you didn’t plan on batting a single eyelid to.
that stupid pineapple cake really did ruin your entire day.
The plans of having a group meal flew out the window, as your family sat with plates full of dinner, you remained on the sofa shooting death glares at each and every single one of them - with the pot of ramen.
No, you couldn’t possibly sit with them after the betrayal so instead chose the violent route.
The terrible twos had turned into terrible twenties.
Paying no attention to the delicacy that was about to pay instant karma, you gather a large portion of the noodles between each chopstick and aimed right for your mouth.
As the searing noodles made contact with your mouth a yelp echoed, wincing in agony, swallowing what was left in that bite.
Curse words fell effortlessly of your tongue
Simultaneously, all eyes fell onto you in amusement yet concern. This being a familiar site that they would normally cater to help, however your little temper tantrum throughout the day didn’t help the current situation.
Running your fingers across your rough lips, feeling the irritation rise on the sensitive skin. Eyes welling in tears, streaming droplets fell one by one down your flushed cheeks.
the dining table remained seated, conversations presumed like normal with very little acknowledgment towards the hurt individual that sat before them.
Feeling a soft hand make contact with your damp chin, the delicate grip guiding your face to meet eyes with the only person who mattered right now.
“I know you’re a hardass, but that’s gotta be painful тигр” the women spoke with sincerity, a gentleness you needed in this moment.
nodding in confirmation, she kneeled down to your level, her hands wiping away the salty tears that began to stain their place on your crimson cheeks.
Her soft, vanilla scented lips made sudden contact with your rough, blistered pair.
her tongue gained granted access, covering all corners of your charred mouth. the pain excluded almost immediately, healed by Natasha’s adoration to you and only you.
She pulled away in slow motion, a smirk forming on her face. Your mouth stabilised to a content smile, the dinner that displayed in front of you was much tastier than anything before.
“малыш, you need to learn patience” she said as both hands cupped the width of your teary face “and eat your vegetables” finishing with a playful and teasing smile.
rolling your eyes in slight confirmation, you leaned in again hungry for more of her magical touch.
From now on you made sure to eat your fruit and vegetables, or at least try just for Natasha.
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hi! i've been very wistfully admiring of your cooking and baking prowess but i'm about at the level of "pasta, vegetable, protein, jarred sauce" at this point and can't imagine getting to where you are. are there recipes you'd recommend for beginners? who hypothetically maybe have never used their oven?
Personally, right now I'm just about in the same spot---my desire to cook things has dropped precipitously, I've survived the last few weeks on salads and roasted chicken and crackers with cheese. But the good news is that there are plenty of options for the lazy cook! And the even better news is that I have all sorts of recipes for you...
DO NOT MAKE ME USE THE OVEN, SO HELP ME GOD
Quinoa Tabbouleh (lots of chopping, but afterwards you can make a giant vat of it and eat it slowly over the course of a week...)
Greek Tuna Salad (throw a bunch of cans together in a giant bowl, then eat it on lettuce)
White Bean and Broccoli Dip with Pesto (I make this by the bucket in the summer, though typically I use parmesan instead of nutritional yeast---and I eat it off of rice cakes!)
Pesto Gnocchi (green beans, cherry tomatoes, and delicious, delicious gnocchi, all smothered in pesto. Literally, where would you go wrong?)
SANDWICHES ARE GROWN-UP FOOD!!
Spicy Vegan Wraps (I am not personally vegan, but I make this all the fucking time)
Lemon Radish Tartine
Roasted Tomato Tartine (....listen you call it a "tartine" and I immediately get really interested)
Chicken Avocado Wraps (not something I make too often, but incredibly easy and mostly about shredding your chicken properly)
I HAVE EXACTLY ONE (1) POT
Quinoa-Kale Bowl (unbelievably easy, and the result is delicious)
BBQ Chicken Quinoa Casserole (this in particular makes for really great leftovers---especially if work has a microwave)
Dump & Bake Chicken and Rice (sometimes you just want a bunch of stuff covered in sauce and it's warm and delicious.)
Smothered Mushrooms and Kale (it's got nutrients and also tastes pretty good)
KEEPING UP WITH THE JONESES (I.E., WHAT TO COOK WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING COMPANY)
Beet Bruschetta with Goat Cheese and Basil (I have made this for multiple different groups, as well as for myself, and every time---EVERY TIME---it's amazing.)
One-Pot Pasta with Sausage and Squash (slightly more sophisticated than the one-pot recipes above---but so fancy! and delicious.)
Puff Pastry Fruit Braid (did you think I'd get through this entire list without a single dessert? this is probably the most adaptable, consistently delightful recipe I have---and incredibly, incredibly easy to use, manipulate, or do whatever you want with. Features helpful pictures, and I think I've used every fruit combination you can imagine.)
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I was raised in a little town and never once questioned my parent's income, it was never a discussion. We didn't eat a lot of fast food because it was considered a treat, not a food group. We drank Kool-Aid made from water that came from our kitchen sink with real sugar. And juice from a cardboard canister in the frozen section. We ate fried egg sandwiches, fried bologna sandwiches, some even ate tuna (which was in a can, not a pouch), PB&J & grilled cheese sandwiches, hot dogs(straight out of the fridge), but mostly homemade meals consisting of meat, potatoes, and vegetables, and pot roast or fried chicken on Sundays after church. We grew up during a time when we mowed lawns, pulled weeds, babysat, helped neighbors with chores to be able to earn our own money. We by no means were given everything we wanted. We went outside a lot to play, ride bikes, run with friends, play hide and seek, or went swimming, horseback riding, played wiffle ball and basketball!! We rarely just sat inside. We drank tap water from the water hose outside, bottled water was unheard of. You LEARNED from your parents instead of disrespecting them and treating them as if they knew absolutely nothing. What they said was LAW, and you did not question it, and you had better know it! We watched what we said around our elders because we knew if we DISRESPECTED any grown-up we would get our behinds whipped, it wasn't called abuse, it was called discipline! We held doors, carried groceries, and gave up our seat for an older person without being asked. You didn't hear curse words on the radio in songs or TV, and if you cursed and got caught you had a bar of soap stuck in your mouth. “Please, Thank you, yes please, no thank you, yes ma'am, no ma'am yes sir, and no sir were part of our daily vocabulary! Consider Re-posting if you're thankful for your childhood. I will never forget where I came from and only wish children nowadays had half the chance at the fun and respect for real life we grew up with! And we were never bored!
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najia-cooks · 5 months
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Cranberry chutney
Sweet, tart, jammy cranberries evolve into the subtle aromatics of cumin, mustard, and bay leaf before rounding off into a smooth, even chili heat in this Anglo-Indian-style chutney. It's excellent in place of cranberry sauce on all kinds of roasts, meat pies, flatbreads, sandwiches, and charcuterie boards.
The cooked fruit-and-vinegar chutneys made by English cooks during the British colonization of India were inspired by the fresh and pickled Indian condiments that English traders and soldiers—including those in the East India Company's military arm—had acquired a taste for, but substituted locally familiar produce and cooking methods for Indian ones. "Indian" recipes began appearing in English cookbooks in the mid-18th century, inspiring and fulfilling a desire for the exotic and, effectively, advertising colonial goods. The domestic kitchen thus became a productive site for the creation and negotiation of colonial ideology: the average English housekeeper could feel a sense of ownership over India and its cultural and material products, and a sense of connection to the colonial endeavor desite physical distance.
This sauce, centered around a tart fruit that is simmered with sugar and savory aromatics and spices, is similar in composition to an Anglo-Indian chutney, but some Indian pantry staples that British recipes tend to substitute or remove (such as jaggery, bay leaf, and mustard oil) have been imported back in. The result is a pungent, spicy, deeply sweet, slightly sour topping that's good at cutting through rich, fatty, or starchy foods.
Recipe under the cut!
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Ingredients:
1/2 cup dried cranberries (krainaberee), or 1 cup fresh or frozen
5 curry leaves (kari patta), or 1 Indian bay leaf (tej patta)
1/2 tsp cumin seeds (jeera)
1/2 tsp black mustard seeds (rai)
3 Tbsp jaggery (gur / gud)
1-3 small red chili peppers (kali mirch), to taste
1/2” chunk (5g) ginger (adarakh), peeled
1 clove garlic (lahsun)
1/2 red onion (pyaaj) or 1 shallot
1 Tbsp mustard oil (sarson ke tel)
1/3 cup (80 mL) water
Pinch black salt (kala namak)
Curry leaves can be purchased fresh at a South Asian grocery store. If you can't find any, Indian bay leaves can be used as a substitute (the flavor isn't per se similar, but it would also be appropriate in this dish). Indian bay leaves are distinct from Turkish or California laurel bay leaves and have a different taste and fragrance. They will be labelled “tej patta” in an Asian or halaal grocery store, and have three vertical lines running along them from root to tip, rather than radiating out diagonally from a central vein.
Instructions:
1. Pound onion, garlic, ginger, and chili to a paste in a mortar and pestle; or, use a food processor.
2. In a thick-bottomed pot, heat mustard oil on medium. Add curry leaves or tej patta and fry until fragrant.
3. Add cumin and mustard seed and fry another 30 seconds to a minute, until fragrant and popping.
4. Lower heat to low. Add aromatic paste and fry, stirring constantly, for about 30 seconds, until fragrant.
5. Add cranberries, jaggery, black salt, and water. Raise heat and bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and cook uncovered, stirring often, until thick and jammy. Remove from heat a bit before it reaches your desired consistency, since it will continue to thicken as it cools.
Store in a jar in the refrigerator for 2-3 weeks.
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