#posted for no particular reason

[chrysaorthegolden]

#posted for no particular reason

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for getting my best friend killed?

I swear to God, it was an accident.

My (27) BF (34) has a reputation for getting himself out of any jam you can imagine; and at first it was just a fun little thing the friend group noticed: there goes Oily J wiggling his way out of trouble again. but as the meme evolved in the group, it got to the point where we'd loykey started getting him into situations just to see how he'd get out of 'em, and he akept getting out of em. He was having fun with it too same as us. "Oh you guys," he'd say, "getting me into situations again," before laughing it off and getting out of it, so it was enrichment for our shared enclosures, and as time went on, the situations got more intense.

The trouble is, it turns out that putting a man in too many situations eventually gets the police interested. And not local hobsknockers cops either; they was like, proper three-letter FEDs. They put out a bounty on any information pertaining to his capture and everything. It was good money too so I thought, hey why don't I put J in another situation he can wiggle out of like always (and he'd wiggled outta worse before, so I thought this one'd be relatively mild), and at the next boardgame night (cause it was too late to do anything special for this one) we can buy some extra strong booze and get absolutely blitzed while having a giggle about the situation.

Boardgame night, and we were playing some social deduction nonsense or another and he says: "One of you is gonna betray me tonight." and I can't help but think, looking back on it, that he knew. It's stupid, I know he was talking about the game, but the way he said it, it was like he knew. We all felt it, and we had a big round robin round the table taking turns promising that we'd never betray him. And I said it so easily cause I thought it was true. Sure, I was gonna talk to the feds about a bounty; but, I fully expected my big beautiful oily boy to wiggle his way out of the trouble I was 'bout to cause, and that's not a betrayal. I wasn't lying. I didn't think I was lying.

My big beautiful oily boy didn't manage to wiggle his way out of it. They killed him and I got my blood money. He's gone.

He's gone and I'm devastated, crying, mourning. I loved him so much. We all did. And I can't stop thinking that it's my fault: that I'm the reason he's gone. and it is. and the guilt is eating me up inside. and I just need to talk to someone about it. So, I tell the rest of the group what happened in the group chat, hoping they'd understand that I didn't want this. I didn't want the government's blood money. It was supposed the be a prank. some joint enclosure enrichment. He was supposed to wiggle out of it like he always does... did, i mean.

They call me, among worse things, the asshole and kick me from the group chat. And, I know it's my fault he's dead: I know that. If I didn't do what I did, he wouldn't be dead right now. But, I didn't mean it for it to end up this way. He was supposed to be okay, damn it. I loved him. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #fandom aita #unreality #i never know how to tag the bible ones #also i don't think this is explicitly jesus christ superstar but for some reason it put me in mind of it #so that's where the extra option is from idk #specifically in my head is one particular production of it that a friend showed me when we were like. 17 #anyway i'm in love with how this one plays with modern language #good enough to post on purpose

[inkskinned]

you wanted to be a good friend, because you loved your friends, but the truth was that everyone else somehow had a pamphlet on being normal that you never received. most of the time you learn by trial-and-error. you are terrified of the next big mistake you make, because it seems like the rules are completely arbitrary.

you've learned to keep the prickly parts of your personality in a stormcloud under your bed - as if they're a second version of you; one that will make your friends hate you. it feels feral, burning, ugly.

instead, you have assembled habits based on the statistical likelihood of pleasing others. you're a good listener, which is to say - if you do speak up, you might end up saying the wrong thing and scaring off someone, but people tend to like someone-who-listens. or you've got no true desires or goals, because people like it when you're passive, mutable. you're "not easy to fluster" which is to say - your emotions are fundamentally uninteresting to others around you; so you've learned to control them to a degree that you can no longer really feel them happening.

you have long suspected something is wrong with you, but most of the time, googling doesn't help. you are so-used to helping-yourself, alone and with no handbook. the reek of your real self feels more like a horrible joke - you wake up, and, despite all your preparations, suddenly the whole house is full of smoke. the real you is someone waiting to ruin your other-life, the one where you're normal and happy. the real-self is unpredictable, angry.

your real self snarls when people infantilize the whole situation. because if you were really suffering, everyone seems to think you'd be completely unable to cope. but you already learned the rules, so you do know how to cope, and you have fucking been coping. it's not black-and-white. it's not that you are healed during the other times - it's just that you're able to fucking try. and honestly, whenever you show symptoms, it's a really fucking bad sign.

because the symptoms you have are ugly and unmanageable for others. your symptoms aren't waifish white girl things. they're annoying and complicated. they will be the subject of so many pretentious instagram reels. if they cared about you, they'd just show up on time. you care, a lot, so deeply it burns you. you like to picture a world where the comments read if they loved you, they'd never need glasses to see. but since that's a rule you've seen repeated - "one must never be late or you are a bad friend" - you constantly worry about being late and leave agonizingly early. there are no words for how you feel when you're still late; no matter how hard you were trying.

so you have to make up for it. you have to make up for that little horrible real you that you keep locked in a cabinet. you are bad at answering emails so every project you make has to be perfect. you are weird and sensitive so you have to learn to be funny and interesting. you are an inconvenience to others, so you become as smooth as possible, buffing out all the rough parts.

all this. all this. so people can pass their hands over you and just tell you just the once -how good you are. you're a good friend. you're loveable.

#spilled ink #woke up at 530 to write this lmafo #me in a cold sweat: #how do i be normal #edit in the tags: #hey so i've seen y'all talk about like ... wondering if ur ''allowed'' to relate #like if this is about X specific diagnosis #and when i first posted it i really almost labelled it ''please don't assume this is about a specific condition'' #because as an artist i am often walking this line of discussing a symptom or discussing my conditions etc #and sometimes yes ! i do want to talk about an experience that is specific to who i am and my condition #but sometimes the effort of the post is about the EXPERIENCE rather than the diagnosis #because yes i am not neurotypical and as a result that influences my work but it is ALSO true that there are many reasons #why someone might experience this particular vague horrible feeling that you are... almost being CHASED by what you ''really'' are. #that you're outrunning your symptoms... that you're not really normal you're just sort of a mockery of a person #.... that's a really isolating and horrible way to feel no matter why you are feeling it. and the nature of this PARTICULAR post is that #it is inherently talking ABOUT that sense of isolation & of feeling not-deserving & of minimizing your own experiences to make urself #palatable for society in a way that others find easy-to-deal-with.... #this post is about a certain experience such that my impression is there's a higher likelihood that those who relate #would have more difficulty thinking they ''deserve'' to relate - that it doesn't REALLY belong to them #bc often we are the kind of people who are SO used to being alienated and set aside and ''different'' that we AUTOMATICALLY assume #that things are not ''for'' us... they never have been why would it start now #we are the kinds of people to be ... ''too normal for X diagnosis but too symptomatic to be normal'' #[or as this post points out... so good at ''coping''/masking/hiding it that we essentially conform to whatever shape we're poured into] #but i have witnessed others already say in the tags ''thought this was about me but it's about X so it can't be'' #and im like ... of course it was about you. #art is not a resource that is diminished by greater appreciation . #you reflect in whatever mirror fits your frame. not just the ones in your bedroom. not just the ones i specifically give you. #there will be - and often are - times that i will talk about my specific conditions... but if you're reading this #regardless of why you're here... we are here together. holding hands through space and time. and i love you for carrying it #and i know you're exhausted. i am too. but i understand. and i see you.

[randomrottmntscreenshots]

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #this particular shot was posted already like 3 times for some reason but here's one with text for better impact #thank you

[cowardlykrow]

"Hah, dude doesn't even know he's in my tamagotchi."

#For some reason he gave me early 2000s vibes as i was drawing him? So of course I turned his box into a tamagotchi✨ #Tinky #I don't care about cannon lore or timelines... all i know is this version of Tinky would torment the SHIT out of College ted. #t’noy karaxis #Nightmare time #time bastard #thinks i proof read it: writes always twice #hatchetfield #Heheh - Silly slushie idea came from @yourlocalabomination #and Edgelord Tinky convo idea came from @raftersomefood #God this particular Human tinky would talk so annoying... SOOO Dude-Bro 💛 #Anyway i guess i should have tried making him look like curt instead of winging it cuz everyone thought i was drawing Goat ted??? #I do think he came out too thin - I dunno know what happened #(PS. feel free to find me on insta for some close ups [same user] and follow me for my annoying stories where i post shitty progress pics)

[divineandmajesticinone]

Art by Ayami Kojima

#ayami kojima #art #userbrittany #illustrations #artedit #userbbelcher #usersugar #chewieblog #posting this....... for no particular reason #but ayami was a real one for this #silver requiem #post by me #my post #mypost

[pokemonheritageposts]

#posts these for no reason in particular :)

[buggachat]

#posting this here for no reason in particular at all

[unorcadox]

i told myself i wouldn’t come back / that i wouldn’t be in / that place / again

#weirdcore #dreamcore #dereality #unreality #my edit #unorcadox #liminal #liminal spaces #nostalgiacore #y2kcore #old web #uo vent #image source: @trashbee #posting this one tonight for a very particular reason

[brother-emperors]

@garland-on-thy-brow #get romancedramad romeboys.

(metal gear solid voice) on it boss 🫡

the first and last ones are scene re draws, in order: the live action adaption of sci mystery, the heirs lmao

#the middle one is a continuation of my agenda to create scenes where Crassus calls Pompey a brat for no particular reason #honestly its better suited for Caesar but I don’t care abt him #ANYWAY using your tags as a excuse to post some of these. I have so many. The ‘we should be friends’ scene from Killer and Healer #a million thoughts abt dmbj ofc since that turned into a whole AU #distantly related. If I was to assign romans pieces of media to explain their vibe. Sulla is the movie Double Mints #drawing tag #tris homines #roman republic tag

[py6oto]

hey guys. please do not be mean about the whole new teaser thing. both to rtvs AND to other people in the community. we are all extremely confused. it's ok to be excited. it's ok to be skeptical. it's ok to experience a deep primal fear rooted from a dark past some of us cannot relate to. it's ok to be new and have no idea what's going on. just please be kind and cool about it!!!!

#hlvrai #no particular reason im posting this im just a little concerned #pls remember we're all just here to have fun !! #obviously some people you do have to be mean for but #they do not speak for all of us #half life vr but the ai is self aware #rtvs #radio tv solutions

[anxiously-sidequesting]

Big shout-out to the ocs and lore that depicts physical/appearance changes due to high concentration and uses of magic btw that shit is so cool. Whether your wizard's hair turns blue or straight up grows an extra arm due to the excessive amount of powerful magic they use everyday I eat that shit up. Bonus points if it's a rare/newly discovered condition or if your wizard is just straight up unrecognizable from arc 1 to arc 4. Bonus bonus points if the wizard gains a disability from it and has to learn to adapt to their new condition

#holly steelcry was shroter than average before the paradox in empyrea thing. they grew 3 ft after that #also got personal hcs of shadow magic in particular having physical and mental adverse effects to those who practice it regularly #i froth at the mouth whenever i see wizard ocs that have extra or atypical features due to their magical experiences #i actually have an eldritch wizard au where they slowly become less Human and more Thing. personality wise theyre still chill- #-but physically they look like Nyarlathotep #one random shadow magic hc - physical scars start to form on your body based on that person's biggest mental block/trauma #shadow practioner young wizard has strange scars that looks like a clawed hand wrapped around their throat or an azteca constellation #<- due to their unresolved guilt over azteca #or scars over their stomach that look like monsteous spider legs stretched outwards due to their guilt of being fooled by gf spider #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #text posts #ALL WIZARD OCS ARE BOMB BTW I DIDNT MEAN JUST ONE TYPE OF OCS. EVERY OC IS AWESOME #i just get the Good Feelings whenever i see that specific type of oc/lore for some reason

[i-am-a-living-god]

aight! So I decided to draw the 03 turtles as cats.

So umm things got a little bit out of hand, and now I have like, a lot of ideas for this. It's an au now, and I'm calling it TMNC- teenage mutant ninja cats.

I'll post more drawings later, as well as some info about the many ideas.

More of this shitty little au!

#Yes there is a reason behind the particular designs I chose #And yes they are mutant cats #I'll explain in another post #tmnt #tmnt 2003 #tmnt donatello #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raphael #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt 2003 mikey #tmnt 2003 leo #tmnt 2003 donnie #tmnt 2003 raph #cats

[dragon-every-day]

Daily dragons all the way throughout 2024!

Heya, welcome to this blog! I'm sure there's plenty of other daily dragon blogs for 2024 because dragons are cool, but hey, more dragons never hurt anyone! (Well like I mean they did in media and stuff but that's besides the point)

Anyway, I'm not going to be taking this blog too seriously, just some fun, cartoony, probably primitively drawn dragons, so sit back and relax!

By the way, I'm always taking requests for dragons, whether it be a type of dragon, a dragon from random media, or a fandom character you want to see as a dragon! (Drop them in whenever, I'd love for there to be a few piled up before next year!)

I don't have many tags, but here they are;

#daily dragon - dragons I draw

#more dragons - dragons I reblog

#not a dragon - other stuff

#that bastard vinny - my son vinny who lives in my phone

I'll also tag each dragon with the day number of the day it was drawn on, and the fandom if it's a part of any!

Follows from @kriscommitscrimes

(btw, this blog is heavily inspired by other blogs like @one-bunny-a-day and @onetigeraday !!)

#daily dragon #info post #chinese new year #year of the dragon #dragons #dragon #the little phone sketch dragon on the post doesn't have a name yet but im thinking something silly like vinny for no reason in particular #nvm hes definitely called vinny #that bastard vinny

[i-heart-hxh]

hi i have a question :3 i didnt rlly fully get these panels but was killua over the edge here bcuz he was worried of gon? like knowing bisky said he would leave gon to die someday.. i was guessing he got so paranoid of it and did this for gon's safety. (^^; help

Yeah, primarily what's going on in this exchange is Killua knows Gon has issues with seeing innocent people being killed, and he worries Gon will intervene if he sees the reality, and get himself killed or injured before they can complete their mission. So he's pushing Gon away for his safety, and so Killua can do what he needs to do without putting him at further risk. Killua did promise himself that he'd protect Gon and make sure Gon can fight Pitou, so this is a part of that.

It's actually part of a larger pattern we see with Killua's behavior towards Gon, where he decides to "protect" him by leaving him out of things and not giving him the full context of what's happening. Think of way back in Heavens Arena when Gido and Sadaso were threatening Zushi. Instead of telling Gon what was happening, Killua went behind his back and handled it himself. Another example is dealing with Rammot during the date with Palm. Not that Gon could have done anything then because he didn't have nen, but Killua doesn't even tell him anything about what happened after the fact.

Of course, it comes out of protectiveness and knowing Gon tends to take things too far, but at the same time it means their relationship can't be fully equal as things are--if Killua feels like he has to hide his own feelings and even what's going on around them in order to protect Gon, it means Gon can't make his own decisions or react to the full truth of a situation, and Killua has to make all these judgment calls about what he thinks Gon should and shouldn't know.

I actually think this exchange is interesting because here Killua is a lot more forthright than usual about what's going on and why Gon needs to stay out of it. But I think it also shows that the issues between them aren't entirely Gon's fault--it also comes from Killua pulling away as a result of his own ways of seeing Gon. Rather than laying out what's going on, discussing it, and letting Gon make his own decisions or talking it out so they both can figure out a solution, he makes decisions for him.

In this case I don't think he's necessarily "wrong" to do this within the context of the mission (though it ends up being a dangerous choice for Killua), especially because he tells Gon what's happening and why he's making the decision he is more-or-less, but it's part of a continuing pattern of Killua trying to shoulder burdens for Gon while (usually) shielding him from knowing Killua is even taking those burdens. In the process of taking on everything himself and not believing he needs backup or help, Killua very nearly gets himself killed (the needlefish scene). Only his kindness in seeing an enemy as a potential friend saves him ultimately.

We don't even know if Killua tells Gon the truth about what happened with that, either--my strong guess based on Killua's repeated tendencies is that he didn't, and he hides the seriousness of what happened to him because he knows it'll upset Gon and split his focus.

Also worth noting that Killua gets so worried about what Gon thinks of him and whether he sees him as a friend or a teammate in this arc, but here within the same arc we see Gon actively disappointed that Killua won't rely on him and stick with him, and wanting to continue to act together. We even see him thinking about it after they split up, worrying about Killua:

Of course this is well before he goes into his full rage hyperfocus that causes him to lash out at Killua, but I still think it's telling that here Gon is wanting to stick together and worrying about Killua's feelings. He seems pretty upset that Killua insists on doing this alone, even though he accepts Killua's logic.

This is all part of the communication tendencies on Killua's side that he's going to need to work on in order to have a better relationship with Gon. Of course, Gon has plenty of maturing to do himself, but I think it's worth remembering that Killua makes decisions like this a number of times that he thinks are in Gon's best interest, but it stunts their communication and means they can't work out the issues between them until they blow up in their faces.

Even their parting seems to be an example of this, where Killua makes all the decisions for Gon and tells himself it's in Gon's best interest, but likely doesn't explain fully why he's doing this. So again Gon is left in the dark about Killua's true feelings and motives.

It makes sense this is Killua's tendency, as is explored in canon Killua was raised with a smothering love, wherein he isn't able to have agency over his own life and others are constantly making decisions for him without his input. It makes sense his love for Gon contains some echoes of that.

Of course, it's something I'm sure they can overcome with time and maturity, but this scene is one example of Killua's protectiveness of Gon getting between the two of them.

#hxh #hunter x hunter #killugon #gonkillu #gon #killua #meta #long post #asks #luniandherkite #my posts #for some reason I feel like there's some aspect I'm leaving out in this post #but ummm if there's anything in particular to add feel free to reblog with it or send an ask! #and I guess I can always add on later if I figure it out #I'm not blaming killua here #he was doing the best he could in a tough situation

[dantebt]

collection of my recent sketchbook pages

#mcyt #lifesteal smp #lifesteal fanart #kings smp #ashswag #planetlord #roshambogames #spokeishere #squiddo #mapicc #princezam #minutetech #princetech #hi princetech nation #pride duo are brothers and cats because of that one particular tumblr post #squiddo's glasses are cracked for lore reasons #thanks for listening to me yapping #four's art!