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emberfrostlovesloki · 4 months

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Freud Said We Should Fuck [Hotch x Reader]

Photo credits: Left and Right (@shakespearesdaughters) Center (@hotchs-big-hands)

Prompt: When Aaron makes a Freudian slip on the jet, he and the reader get flushed, and later, once the case is finished, the reader finds him in his office on a lonely Saturday and teases him about it. Aka, when the reader and Hotch do something in his office other than paperwork.

Pairing: Aaron x fem BAU-reader. The reader uses she/her pronouns

Category: Fluff/angst/smut

Word Count: 9.9K

A/N: Hi loves! First off, this story is 18+, minors DNI. Please respect this boundary. I’m finally back writing again and I’m so happy about it. However, I feel like it’s going to take me a bit to get back into the swing of things. I had a lot of my AU written and then I just thought it was moving too slow. So I’ve put that on hold for a bit and gone back to what I love smut. I don’t think the sex here is the best I’ve ever written, but I still like it. This idea came about because @silk-spun and I were chatting about Aaron and office sex and I couldn’t stop thinking about it - so naturally I wrote it. Please have a look at the notes before reading as there are some things that some plot points that some readers might want to avoid. I hope you like this and if you do, likes, comments, and replies are appreciated! Content Warnings under the cut. I hope you are having a good week. Love Levi - ❤️

Content Warnings: There are two unsubs mentioned in this fic: The one most talked about is a family annihilator [There are mentions of wives and children being killed, depiction of dead bodies, description of a bloody room, mention of suicide via gun (unsub)] The second unsub kills at random [There are mentions of poisoning, falling to one’s death and drowning (the body is briefly described)] Mention of past trauma and abuse [Hotch] and the mention of an absent father. There is also sex: touching over the clothes, sex in a semi-public setting [Hotch’s office] fellatio, p in v (unprotected] Very slight dom vibes from the reader and Hotch and the slightest mention of a size kink. If I missed any, please let me know.

List with all stories

_y/n_ = your name

_c/t_ = coffee or tea (whichever you prefer)

_u/sf/d_ = up/straight forward/down (depending on height).

_s/l_ = short or long

_kl/s/m_ = knee length/short/mini (pick your favorite skirt length)

_y/f/c/s_ = your favorite color and style (bra)

_y/f/t/f_= your favorite type of food

The team sat in the jet as they moved toward Evansville Indiana. The skilled agents were bantering ideas off of each other, as they normally did. This unsub was very blatant with their modus operandi. As Aaron had debriefed in the conference room an hour earlier with the team and Garcia, he said, “The unsub we’re dealing with allegedly has three distinct personalities. Although I would be hesitant to diagnose anyone with a split personality disorder or DID. Many people with this condition are stigmatized due to the negative stereotypes associated with that name. If our unsub does have this condition, then we work from there. But with what we know now, this might just be a part of the ritual and pattern. The police are adamant that it’s a suspect from a mental hospital, but be wary of this. J.J. I want you to cut this off at the bud as soon as we get to the station. The media liaison nodded and replied, “You got it Hotch. I’ll clear that up and make sure they haven’t come up with any nicknames either. That always gets the press in a stir.” Aaron nodded. There wasn’t time for that kind of coverage right now. The team needed to jump in immediately once they touched down. This unsub had a swift turnaround time, killing in heinous and various ways almost every other night. His signature was that at the body of each victim, the unsub left a note from either the Id, the Ego, or the Superego, and by how killing his victims, the unsub had ‘cured them,’ and how the cure had worked. The killer's notes were reminiscent of Freud’s case notes, detailed and a bit deranged. The methods of death had been drowning, poisoning, being drowned, and most recently a fatal fall from a high cliff on a popular walking trail. _y/n_ had cringed at the sight of the drowned victim’s bloated body. It was blue and purple from its extended time in the water. The poisoned victim didn’t look any better. As was usual with BAU cases, the victims had suffered significantly before their deaths. _y/n_ had asked the group as a whole once the note element came out, “Is this guy serious? I mean, Freud is more infamous than famous at this point. His clients were all wealthy Swiss members of society, and he was ridiculed later in life for changing his theories all the time. I mean, how many Fruedians are still honestly out there?” Spencer happily replied, “In terms of clinical, licensed therapists? I’d say very few. Probably around 0.5 percent at this point. But that doesn’t mean that psychoanalysis isn’t still used in a good deal of therapeutic systems. I mean ‘Talk Therapy’ is the norm in most EBT therapy systems. So although Freud and Heidegger might have faded to obscurity, their theories remain.” Hotch had nodded and said stoically, “Wheels up in thirty. We can continue this discussion on the plane. If the unsub sticks to his pattern. They might have a new victim already.”

Thus the team, plus Penelope were on the plane like normal. Once the jet hit cruising altitude, the team seemed to relax a bit They all fell into their usual clusters, and Hotch observed them. _y/n_, Rossi, and Spencer were continuing the psychological aspect of the case with _y/n_, while Em, Derek, and Garcia talked about the victimology and methods of the murders. Lastly, JJ was writing up a short press brief for the police and the public. Aaron knew we could never be thankful enough for the work that JJ did for the team. She covered their backs more than he could ever imagine. It was hard enough doing the job they did, but having JJ backing them up meant they weren’t smeared in the press even more. Hotch made his way to her. He sat on the seat next to hers and looked over her work. The blond woman handed him a notebook page with her statement from the police force. She said, “This is what I’ve got so far. If you have any more legal or profiler things you’d like me to add, just note them in the margins.” The woman handed him a blue ballpoint pen, and Hotch did his best to look carefully and thoroughly over the short blurb. He added a few police procedural things, but otherwise, it looked good. Aaron pushed the paper back on the small table and said, “Looks good J. I just added a few notes. Let me know when you have the one for the public done, and look it over too.” JJ looked up at him as he stood and said, “You got it Hotch. And I’ll make those corrections after I’m done with this.” Aaron then moved to Em, Morgan, and Garcia. They were looking at a map both on the seat and on Penelope's computer. Derek and Em were pinpointing the sites of the victim's body on the physical map while Garcia did the same on her laptop. The trio was trying to make a geographic profile and also see if the sites were linked to a road, river, or some natural feature. All three victims had been found in parks or locations adjacent to parks. As Hotch looked over the map, Emily said, “Given the natural locations of the dump sites and how well-versed the unsub seems to be with local and national parks in the area, this person may be a game warden or resource officer or something like that. Those positions are often isolating and not well-paid. Maybe the unsub has emotions tied to their work. That they’re not achieving enough, or making enough of an impact?” Hotch nodded at the logic of her statement and said to Garcia, “Once you’ve done that work, Garcia, look up the databases for Park Service workers and Game Wardens and make a preliminary risk. Target those who work in the parks where the victims were found and those that have been having problems at work or have had problems at work in the last two months.” Garcia loved getting directions from Aaron. She always thought that his brain was close to hers, except that he was just the quiet version of her. She smiled and said, “Aye, aye captain. Coming right up.” Aaron gave Garcia a small smile and said, “Thanks Penelope.”

Aaron got up again. Before he moved to the last group, he was going to get a cup of coffee for himself _c/t_ for _y/n_. It was their ritual on the plane now. When they were in the office, _y/n_ got him coffee from the breakroom, and when they were on the jet, he got her drink. Aaron’s and _y/n_ relationship had moved from a strong friendship to a light romance, to, in the last six months, a much more heated and sexual affair. Of course, neither of them could say, and much less do anything while they were at work but show small gestures of affection for the other. Aaron and _y/n_ were both professional and could easily keep their relationship work-coded. That didn’t however, mean that Hotch didn’t think about the things they did off the clock. The sound of _y/n_’s bright laugh had his mind reeling back to last weekend. It had been a lazy Saturday morning at his place. She had mentioned getting a snack from the coffee shop down the street before going on a walk in the park or going to get a new book for Jack, who was currently at Haley’s. Aaron had sleepily said something like, “I think you’re enough of a snack as it is, _y/n_” as he rolled onto his back.

There was a moment of silence before _y/n_ started softly laughing. Hotch moved his eyes to her. He expected her to stop laughing after a minute, but his gaze only had her laughing more loudly. She was nearly in stitches as her mirth overflowed. Hotch, not quite sure what had caused her to be so joyful, poked her side and said, “Alright, I give up. What’s so funny? Is my breath bad or something?” Even as Hotch asked, he couldn’t stop himself from starting to laugh too. This was something unique with _y/n_. She allowed him to open up emotionally in ways that he rarely even had. After _y/n_ had caught her breath she said, “Is that your attempt at dirty talk Hotch? If so you need to take a course.” Aaron scoffed at that and said teasingly, “I’ll make you eat those words _y/n_.” As he finished that sentence, he leaned over her and kissed her. He started lightly but became more intense as _y/n_ ran her tongue over his bottom lip. Soon enough, he was undoing the buttons of her night shift and moving his mouth lazily downward with _y/n_ saying his name breathily every time he nipped her skin lightly with his mouth. His breath was hot on the cool expanse of her body. Aaron realized as he started to make the encounter more intimate and relished in how her body responded to his.

Hotch knew that apart from being with _y/n_, he was about as closed off as human could be, and he knew it. His past as a child had inherently shown him that weakness meant pain and suffering and as hard as he had tried to grow out of that, he still had some of those mental barriers up, and they often rose when he was in situations that dealt with lots of emotions. Often he found himself unable to reciprocate. That was part of the reason that he assumed that he was so good at being a prosecutor and a profiler. People’s emotions, whether they be the unsub’s or the victim’s didn’t cause him to bluster, or lose sight of the bigger picture. He was sympathetic to the victims and listened to them with sincerity, but their pain often didn’t affect him the way it did _y/n_. This was the reason that after he spoke to the various victims, he would direct them over to _y/n_ to talk further. So they could cry unabashedly and have someone to hold them tight as they did so. Often Aaron would catch her eyes as they made the silent trade-off. There was always a silent conversation that happened in these looks. It was Aaron saying, ‘Thank you,’ and _y/n_ responded, ‘I got you.’ With time Aaron had slowly started dropping those barriers with _y/n_. She made him feel more human. More intact with his emotions such as joy and the ability to do the unexpected. Things and emotions which he had hidden inside himself a long time ago. The first time that Aaron had been very open to _y/n_ was the first time that he realized that he might have deeper feelings for _y/n_ than respect or camaraderie.

It had been a difficult case. One of the worst. The unsub had been a family annihilator. The man, Mr. Platheville, was targeting young families with only one child. The madman had killed two mothers and their children leaving the fathers to watch in horror and live with the site of the massacre they had witnessed. The first man they had found was shell-shocked and unable to move. An ambulance and mental health experts had been called for him. The next man had been so angry that Hotch and Derek had to hold the man back from hitting and punching himself or the wall or anyone within striking distance. _y/n_ had watched on with apprehension, trying to calm the man down with her words. Although those two cases had been horrible, it was nothing compared to the last. The unsub had called and said where he was and that he had another family hostage. There were audible screams on the other side of the phone. Mr. Plathville had said, “Come quickly. Please. I can’t stop myself anymore.” At first, the team felt like this was a good step. A great step even. The man was giving himself up and asking for help. However, as the tapped line was about to be disconnected, a child’s voice cut in. It sounded scared and small as it said, “Daddy? What’s wrong with Mommy?” That had the whole team freeze. The realization that Plathville had his own family captive now had the team feel like the floor was dropping out from under them -- everyone’s stomach sinking into knots. Hotch dropped the phone first and softly said, “Everyone, move, now.” After a second, he found his voice and said loudly, authoritatively, “Move. Now.” Aaron started running to the van, and he watched as his team followed him to both his car and the other SUV. _y/n_ and Rossi piled into Hotch’s car and hurriedly buckled as Hotch hit the gas pedal. The rubber tires squealed and burned on the concrete. _y/n_ had snatched the passenger seat in the front. Hotch’s jaw was set in a tight grimace as he sped down the road. His driving was close to erratic. It wasn’t something _y/n_ had seen in him before. _y/n_’s eyes found Rossi’s in the review mirror. The older man also looked a bit concerned as well. Gently, _y/n_ placed a hand on Aaron’s upper arm. She could feel the muscle tight under his sleeve as his hands gripped the wheel. At her touch, Hotch’s eyes briefly left the road and met hers. Whatever expression she had on her face was enough to slow his driving speed. For him to pay closer attention to the road.

Hotch was making her nervous. He didn’t seem like himself, but she didn’t say anything. There would be time for that later. The vans came to a raging halt outside the address that Plathville had disclosed. The house seemed quiet. Eerily so. Derek and Hotch approached the door softly. Derek breached the door and the team rushed inside. The front foyer was dark and there was no sound reverberating around the open area. The team fanned out in the ranch-style house. Derek and Spencer moved to the left side of the house toward the kitchen and guest bedroom. Rossi and Emily took the upstairs, and Hotch and _y/n_ moved left toward the living room and master bedroom. The other families had been found in the living room, and _y/n_ braced herself for a similar scene. Hotch’s shoulders tensed as he moved into the entryway of the living room. It meant that this family was already dead too. _y/n_ felt a part of her break inside, but she pulled the pieces back together for the team. For those who had passed. Both agents stepped into the room. The fact that the walls, carpet, and sofa were cream-colored only highlighted the dark splatters marring the walls, couch, and carpet which was soaked with a dark stain. _y/n_ pointed to the light switch and mouthed, “Should I turn it on?” Hotch nodded his head no and inclined this head toward the bedroom door, indicating that Mr. Plathville might still be in the bedroom. It was the only space they hadn’t breached. If Plathville was still in the house either alive or dead, it was in that room. As the calls of Spencer and Emily echoed through the house stating, “Clear,” a small sound came from behind the closed door. Both agents' eyes snapped to the door, and they moved forward. Once they got to the door. Aaron held out a hand to stop her. He shook his head no. He leaned forward and whispered, “Go look at the bodies. And then stop the rest of the team from entering the living room.” _y/n_ met his dark eyes. They seemed to go on forever. He had the look he had before when the child had spoken on the phone. The same look he had had in the car. _y/n_ desperately wanted to know what was going on in his head, but again, now wasn’t the time. _y/n_ nodded and moved back from the door. She moved to the two bodies on the floor but continued to watch as Aaron opened the door, stepped inside, and said, “Mr. Plathville. Don’t do this. Do you think this is the ending your wife and daughter would have wanted for you?” Hotch closed the door behind him, leaving the room in semi-darkness. Hotch could hear soft movement from the other side of the door. It was _y/n_ and it sounded like she was crying. Aaron pushed aside the soft sounds and focused only on Plathville. The cold metal weapon the unsub was holding in his dominant hand wasn’t pointed in any direction, but it could be in an instant. Hotch didn’t want _y/n_ in the room. Because Aaron knew family annihilators, he knew them because he lived with one of them as a child. As an adult, once he learned the proper terms for killers and sadists, he realized that if he hadn’t taken the brunt of what his father doled out, his own father might have been a Plathville as well. Aaron didn’t want _y/n_ to see what might happen. He didn’t want her to see this. Hotch put up his hands and said, “Put down the gun Mr. Plathville. You’ve been a coward with how you’ve treated others because they didn’t do what you liked. Don’t be a coward now, at the end. Face what you’ve done and prove that you’re actually a man.”

The unsub, eyes dark and glazed looked like he was about to set the gun on the bed. Aaron hoped that was what he was doing, but he didn’t trust the man either. Just as the gun seemed to be safe, Plathville turned the weapon on himself. Outside the closed door, _y/n_ heard a very loud bang. A deafening sound. At this point, _y/n was standing by the hallway with Derek. Em, and Rossi. She was doing her best to keep the three other agents at bay. When the BAU team heard the gunshot, they all rushed back into the room. Derek drew his sidearm as they all did and breached the door. _y/n_’s heart pounded in her chest because she had left him alone. Alone with an unsub who they knew had a gun; and if Aaron was dead, she would never be able to forgive herself. Not for all time. As the team rushed into the room. Hotch’s strong profile stood out against the window. His nose and jawline were distinct against the streetlight that seeped light into the room through the casement window. Aaron seemed frozen on the spot and the still and bloodied body of Mr. Plathville was slumped on the bed. _y/n_ moved forward and avoided her gaze from the new body. She took Aaron’s arm and pulled him out of the room. Not just the room but the house as well. She sensed that he needed the space away from the darkness emanating from the home. The graveyard.

When they were at the side of the house opposite the bedroom, _y/n_ stopped. She looked down at his shoes, they had blood splatters on the toe. She looked _u/sf/d_ at him. His face was also splattered with blood. _y/n_ reached over, pulling the cuff of her white sleeve over her palm; she started wiping away the viscous red fluid from his sharp facial features. _y/n_ reflected for a moment on how attractive Aaron really was, with his stoicism and strong jaw, and how terrible a time it was for such thoughts to surface. _y/n_ pushed them away as Hotch seemed to come to himself, as she moved her hand to the other side of his face. The blood smears here were larger. There was other matter that _y/n_ would rather not speculate on. Aaron’s left hand raised and pushed her own dirtied sleeve away from his face. Hotch seemed to take a small breath, and he looked like a child who had been caught doing something wrong. _y/n_ wondered if it was his showing emotion out in the open that he perceived as being bad. She looked back at him before he seemingly crumpled into _y/n_’s arms. Low sobs reverberated on her shoulder. Tears staining _y/n_’s already soiled shirt. _y/n_ was grateful the police cruisers were on the other side of the house. Parked on the gravel drive. _y/n_knew that they would have to move soon or else the team would come looking for them. She was sure Hotch would not want to be found in such a compromised state.

_y/n_ didn’t know what else to say than, “I’m sorry Hotch. I know it’s sick and fucked up, but at least there’s no one else he can hurt. Not even himself.” And it was true. It burned _y/n_ that Mr. Plathville would face no consequences for his crimes of passion, but when an unsub took the end into their own hands, there was a certain finality to the matter. There would be fewer interviews and less press. There wouldn’t be a trial or the need for written testimony from everyone involved. It felt like a twisted prize for a game no one had asked to play. After a moment, Aaron replied softly, “It’s not that. Or it is that and some other stuff. I don’t know why I’m like this. I’m sorry.” _y/n_ frowned and pulled away a bit. Hotch looked at her with eyes asking, begging for her to stay. She took his right hand which was hanging limply at his side and said, “Let’s just walk down the drive and back. It will give you a moment to compose yourself. Get your thoughts in order. “Aaron seemed to hesitate and said, “But the police… the team, they might.” _y/n_ cut him off gently saying, “They can wait. The cops have plenty of people to interview and material to bag and tag. They can wait while we take a five-minute walk.

_y/n_ found that walking got people talking. Particularly if the people were not wanting to open up. The movement and change of scenery seemed to give whomever she was walking with a breather and a chance to let out some thoughts if they wanted. If they didn’t, then at least they’d both gotten some fresh air. This technique had worked with Morgan, JJ, and Em. I had not worked with Spencer, but Spencer spoke so freely all the time that if he had something he didn’t want to share, then he didn’t want to share, and she understood that. This was the first time she was trying this method on Aaron. As they made it halfway up the drive, and not so much to her shock, Hotch let out a sigh and said, “It was Jack’s birthday yesterday…” _y/n_ looked over to him briefly. His eyes were on the ground, Glued to it. She knew that wasn’t the whole issue, but _y/n_ replied, “I’m sorry you had to miss that for this mess.”

They kept walking. and Aaron let out another breath and continued, “When I see people like Plathville, I see my father. I see a bit of myself in him as well.” _y/n_ furrowed her brow and turned to look at him, walking backward, matching his pace. She didn’t know a lot about Hotch’s father apart from the fact that he was dead and had hurt Aaron very badly. Perhaps she could see a correlation there between the unsub and Hotchner Sr., but she couldn’t see how Hotch was at all like either man. She asked for clarity saying, “What do you mean? I don’t see how you’re like either of those monsters. You’re tied to your father by blood, but he’s gone.” Aaron looked at her and then back down the dark path they were on. A lone streetlamp shone at the end of the road. They reached it and turned back before Aaron said, “It’s a pattern. They were both absent fathers. They both lashed out at things and people. And look at me. I hardly see Jack. It feels like once in a blue moon. And I might not be lashing out at people because my job takes out that stress. But look at me in the office, I’m still anal about things. I just see these patterns. I don’t want to fail as a father, and I feel like I am.” And there it was. There was the crux of his emotions and _y/n_ ached for his pain, for his fear, even if it seemed unfounded to her. It certainly wasn’t unfounded to him, and she’d never say that. As they moved back toward the house. _y/n_ was wording and rewording her response again and again in her head; she couldn’t quite seem to come up with the perfect response. It all sounded too close to “I love you and other people love you too, can’t you see that?” She felt the hairs picked up on the back of her neck and she looked over to Aaron. He was staring at her, Asking for some kind of reply. They were near the house again and she stopped, and he stopped too. Now _y/n_ gave a sigh, her breath making a little cloud in front of her face. She finally replied, “Aaron, I don’t know what this is going to sound like to you, but here it is. I think you’re tired. I haven’t seen you sleep in three days straight because this case is so close to you. It’s close because it involves a group of people who can’t protect themselves, or their children. And I think in some ways after Haley filed, you think that you can’t protect her or Jack either. But Aaron, you’ve handled everything there with as much grace and compassion as you could. You did what Haley wanted and you still try and look after them. And maybe you don’t see Jack as often as you like, but you try. I hear you call him at night when the team’s away. And the stories you tell about when he spends the weekends over make it sound like you don’t just shower him with gifts or love bomb him. You’re trying to have a relationship with him. And I never hear you badmouth Haley, ever, which means your son can know that not all relationships work out but there can still be a kind of love and respect. A lot of kids don’t get that.” _y/n_ took a breath and she saw in his eyes that he was coming more to himself, as she finished stating, “And about you being like your father, yeah, genes are passed down, but I don’t believe that people are born bad. I think something bad happens to them and you either continue the cycle or break it. And you’re far too kind of a person, even if you don’t show it, to keep doing what you’re father did. You’d never do those things to another person. You’re not him Hotch. You never will be.”

_y/n_ looked at him to see what his reaction to her words would be. Aaron looked like he might cry again, but was holding back those emotions. She hoped she hadn’t overstepped some emotional or professional line, but she didn’t have time to ask as Hotch stepped forward and wrapped her in a hug. His warm body enveloped her in the cold night. His breath fanned the _s/l_ hair at the nape of her neck. He whispered, “Thank you for that, _y/n_. I needed to hear that.” When Aaron pulled back, he was himself again. He nodded and motioned his head toward the house. As he attempted to move forward, _y/n_ grabbed his coat sleeve, and he looked at her confused. _y/n_ said, “Wipe the left side of your face Hotch. It’s still bloody.” Aaron rolled his eyes and chuckled softly. They both started walking back to the house, and he wiped off his face. As they walked back, there was an understanding that something deeper had happened between them. As Aaron moved past the cruisers with red and blue lights still flashing, he raised the caution tape for _y/n_, and as she stepped under it. Aaron looked at her and felt a warmth seep through him. It bit through the cold outside, and he didn’t mind it.

Aaron pulled his mind out of the haze that was focused on the sounds that _y/n_ had made last Saturday morning. Her moans and whimpers rang in his ears for a second longer. He was thankfully snapped back to the interior of the jet as a bit of turbulence rocked the aircraft. Aaron cleared his throat and moved to the coffee maker. He made himself a cup of black coffee first. He shot a prayer up to any possible deity up there that his body and mind had not synced enough for him to be aroused by his mind's inappropriate wandering. Having to hide an erection wasn’t his idea of a fun time. It had happened once or twice before and he had to rush to the bathroom and splash cold water on his face and neck. When Hotch’s cup was done, he moved another clean styrofoam cup under the dispenser and started making _y/n_’s _t/c_. He stifled a yawn. He had spent much of the last two days working on field reports and revising the FBI’s security training. It was woefully behind the times. He had coordinated with Penelope and as helpful as Garcia was in terms of the technological aspects of cyber security, the lingo and Pen’s energy had worn him out a bit. The Keurig beeped, indicating _y/n_’s drink was done. He doctored the beverage as she liked. Aaron half blamed his wandering mind on his lack of sleep and the case. Spencer’s clear voice cut through all the others and he was talking about the more interesting sexual elements of Freud’s theories including the more lurid Oedipus and Xena complexes. Reid was going on about how the notes from the unsub seemed to really dive into those theories even though there was no sexual aspect to the case yet. Hotch grabbed _y/n_’s cup and moved back to the final group he had not spoken with yet.

He sat next to _y/n_ and handed her her cup. _y/n_ looked at Hotch and gave him a small smile before taking a sip of her drink. _y/n_ had a random thought, as she mulled over the bizarre nature of the case. She said aloud, “What do you think Freud would think about people using his theories like this? I mean he was odd and problematic, but not that odd.” Aaron had his eyes closed, and he replied without even thinking said, “I think Freud would say we should fuck.” _y/n_ nearly spat out her drink. The liquid burned her throat as it went down. Hotch caught his mistake and flushed, quickly amending his statement saying, “I mean if Freud were still here, he would probably think the unsub would want to have intercourse with his victims. It could either be latent sexual attraction or transference of sexual desire for an authority figure like a parent or teacher. An attraction that shouldn’t be acted out.” Hotch could feel his ears burning, and he hid his face by taking a long drink of his coffee. The dark liquid burned his mouth but this pain was better than having to face to look of utter shock of his friends. Thankfully the awkwardness only lasted a second longer as Spencer picked up on his hurried line of thinking saying, “You could be right. This unsub might be impotent and killing as a means of sexual release. Or they could be killing as a displacement tactic for unwanted feelings.” Reid jumped into that conversation with a fervor and _y/n_ added her thoughts in too along with taking some notes on the comments Spence made.

Although Spencer didn’t choose to comment on what Hotch had said, when the Unit Chief looked over at Rossi, his friend had an eyebrow raised and an expression that said, “Really, Aaron?” Hotch closed his eyes, sighed, and rubbed a hand over his eyelids as if saying, “I’m tired. Alright?” When Aaron opened his eyes again, Rossi just gave a little shrug as if saying, “Hey. I have three ex-wives. I’m not one to judge.” The older man ever so slightly looked over to _y/n_ and gave a small smile. The team knew that Hotch was seeing _y/n_. They were all too perceptive not to tell. But what he had just said was more personal than the team needed to know. At least not yet. Aaron liked keeping his private life private, and he would have to apologize to _y/n_ for putting their personal business out there like that. He was just thankful that he had made that slip of the tongue in front of Spencer and Dave and not Morgan and Garcia. There would be no end to the gossip if that had been the case. Aaron sat back in his seat and did his best to put back on the Unit Chief facade. One great thing was that he was able to compartmentalize his emotions and what had just happened was just a blunder. He fell easily back into the conversation and made himself useful to the team.

The case was a wild one with the team being kept on their feet, as the unsub devolved into crazier and more complex kills. Thankfully the unsub, one Kathy Kittery got sloppy as her mind crumbled under the weight of her own brain. Thus, only one other victim was lost, the others, though traumatized would make it through the ordeal. Ms. Kittery was a therapist who had had her license revoked after having an affair with a client. Once she had taken that blow, she had moved to a second career that had always interested her. Being a Ranger in a State Park. However, as it turned out, the mental isolation did not help with her already troubled state and she had slipped into acting on her delusions, thus the need for the team to come in the first place. After the unsub had been arrested, the team, as normal, was assured that she wouldn’t be seeing freedom for a good long while. On the jet home, Aaron’s sexual comment was almost forgotten by everyone, including himself, but _y/n_ remembered and as she closed her eyes to sleep on the short flight back, her brain played out certain scenarios that she also wouldn’t want to be voiced in front of the others. When the jet touched down, the team disembarked and _y/n_ asked Aaron as they walked back to the main office, “So, what are you doing tomorrow?” Tomorrow was Saturday and she hoped that they could spend the day together or with Jack if he was staying over at Hotch’s that weekend. It felt like a while since they had had a good day to themselves. Work had piled up, and she longed for just a few solid hours with Aaron. Hotch, however, didn’t seem to pick up on her tone as he was tired. He replied in a monotone, “Probably filling out paperwork in the office I’m behind on like three cases worth and this makes a fourth.” _y/n_ pouted slightly. She knew she was being silly, but sometimes Aaron needed a break for his own good, and an idea started brewing in the back of her mind. If she had the nerve to do even half of what her head was cooking up, she would have done something she had been imagining for a long time. Longer than was appropriate probably. For the moment she just said, “Mhm. Sounds productive.” Hotch scoffed as they both entered the sliding glass door. Even he knew his life, and particularly weekends sounded miserable sometimes. After all, he was the one that put him through them.

The next afternoon, _y/n_ pulled up to the Quantico field office. She parked her car next to Aaron’s and set her employee parking pass on the dash so it could be seen by security. _y/n_ chuckled remembering the one time that Derek had forgotten his pass and had his Corvette towed on a Saturday. Her athletic friend had been so flustered, saying, “Oh come on! I work at the freaking FBI you’d think there would be some camera’s in this lot and they’d know I work here!” _y/n_ had laughed, patted his shoulder, and offered him a ride to the impound lot to pick up his flashy car. As _y/n_ moved through the mostly empty lot she smiled. Not that she expected there to be a lot of people at the office on a Saturday afternoon, but it boded well for what she had in mind. As entered the office and was waived through security quickly, she hadn’t brought her gun or anything important with her. She entered the bullpen and looked up at Hotch’s office. His lights were on and she could see him looking at something on his desk. It was most likely a field report. The bullpen was empty and most of the lamps on the desks were off. One or two burned brightly in the soft space. One or two of the agents must have forgotten to turn them off in the rush to get home on Friday. She turned off the lamps as she texted Aaron, “Hey, you at the office?” She looked up at his office window and his head turned to the side. Clearly, he had just received her message. His left hand raised and a second later her phone beeped. Hotch had sent back a simple “Yes.” He was never one to be overly elaborate over text. If he was forced to type more than one full paragraph he would just give up and call instead. _y/n_ always chalked it up to his hands being too big for the small phone screen. He probably made a lot of accidental typos with his thumbs and had to go back and correct them which seemed like a thing that would annoy him to no end, even if he did have autocorrect on his phone. _y/n_ took a breath as she looked at Aaron again. He was back to his paper. _y/n_ had jokingly said she would do this if the spirit led her, but somehow seemed like the dirty things she was picturing in her head were driving her up the stairs and not ‘the spirit.’ Outside Hotch’s door, she knocked once and then turned the knob. She stepped into the dimly lit room and closed the door behind her. She softly said, “Hey Hotch, how are the papers going?” Aaron looked up from his desk. He did a bit of a double take as his eyes flicked to his phone and then back to her. His eyes held a hint of surprise, warmth, and general confusion as he said, “_y/n_. What are you doing here? Do you need something?” _y/n_ couldn’t help but flush already. Hotch was just too cute sometimes; especially when he wasn’t trying.

_y/n_ smiled at him and took a seat across from him at his desk. _y/n_ sighed and said, “I was just bored I guess. I had nothing better to do, so why not give you a hand with your paperwork? Maybe I can get you out of here earlier than five p.m. on a Saturday?” Aaron raised a brow. He highly doubted that that was _y/n_’s only reason for being here, but he wouldn’t question her. Instead, he picked up a case file, and set it in front of her saying, “Suit yourself, love.” _y/n_ flushed again and pulled one of Aaron’s ballpoint pens out of the cup he kept a stash in. _y/n_ wondered how many pens he dried up per year, but wasn’t in the mood for calculus problems right now. Instead, she opened the file and started working on the first page. She had to take it for at least ten minutes before she made a move. _y/n_ assumed if she outright said, “Hey wanna have sex in your office there would be two simultaneous outcomes. The first was that she would no longer be Aaron Hotchner’s partner and that she would be a former FBI Behavioral Analyst. Neither of which sounded very appealing. So she took her time.

When Aaron seemed absorbed in his work again, she slipped off her shoe and moved her foot across the space between her side of the desk and his. It was a bit of a reach, but she managed to brush Aaron’s ankle and the inside of his trouser leg. That did it and Aaron’s eyes snapped to hers. They were dark, hiding emotions that he often kept at bay. He cleared his throat and said, “_y/n_, really?” You chuckled and said, “Sorry. I just like to see you flustered.” _y/n_ pulled her leg back and Aaron watched as she flushed but returned to her papers. _y/n_ knew he liked it when she was a tease sometimes and that was her plan for this potentially risky act she was trying to have with Hotch. After another ten minutes, _y/n_ repeated the same action, except this time she moved her foot higher up his leg She applied gentle pressure to the inside of his leg. His grey trousers were cool under her foot as they moved up past the knee and onto his inner thigh. Her dark stockings were the only barrier between her skin and the fabric of his pants. _y/n_ looked up at him and he let out a soft breath as if his brain hadn’t caught up with his body yet. When the two entities of mind of body did collide his brows furrowed trying to reconcile the pleasure coursing through his body and the fact that this shouldn’t be happening in his office.

Before he could make any protestation, _y/n_ cut him off saying, “So, ‘Freud said we should fuck’ did he?” This reminder of his slip of the tongue gagged Aaron momentarily. It gave _y/n_ enough time to shift lower in her chair and slip her foot high enough to press over his crotch. Aaron let out a little grunt at the contact. _y/n_ continued to run her foot over his zipper, up and down in a rhythmic pattern. _y/n_ smiled as his eyes grew hazy with desire. A look she’d seen on him often, just not in his office. Never in his office. But she had dreamed about it plenty. She’d woken soaked on occasions with the notion of Aaron having her in his office, blinds drawn tight as they made love in the enclosed space. Aaron stuttered trying to make a coherent sentence, but his cock slowly hardening in his pants was not helping him at all. _y/n_ could feel it under her foot and continued to tease him saying, “You know you really shouldn’t make comments about our sex lives in front of a team of profilers. I think you owe me an apology?” _y/n_ pulled her foot away and Aaron groaned at the loss of contact, but suddenly his mind was more clear. Half of Aaron’s brain cursed _y/n_ for knowing just the right way to turn him on. The other half was already imagining her splayed out on his desk as he ate her out, or pounded into her so hard that the desk left marks on her hips. Those thoughts alone had his member twitch against his belt and fly. To consumed in his thoughts, Aaron slipped off his own left shoe, and perhaps more gently than _y/n_ had, he moved his foot up her leg and to her cunt. _y/n_ opened her legs for him slightly pushing her _kl/s/m_ length skirt up a bit. Even wearing socks, Aaron could tell that _y/n_ was wet. The moan she made as he just brushed over her sex and him realize that he couldn’t wait. That he needed her, now. Hotch took away his foot and reveled in the needy noise _y/n_ also made at the lack of contact. Hotch moved quickly to his door, locking it from the inside before closing the shades to the office. His movements were hasty, jerky even. _y/n_ watched him, knowing the sexual tension must have built up since the last time they had been intimate.

_y/n_ wasn’t sure what Aaron had in mind but she did have to ask, “There aren’t any hidden cameras in here, right?” Hotch chuckled, the sound was throaty, and he replied, “Not that I know of. And if they are, then at least we’ll both be fired.” _y/n_ laughed at this and took his hand; she led him back to his office chair. _y/n_ appreciated that he had a sense of humor in these moments that were new to him. _y/n_ knew that she pushed him to do things he hadn’t before both in and out of the bedroom, but he never complained and the bulge in his pants told her that he was already looking forward to what she was about to do for him. Aaron looked up at her a bit amazed at the things she could make him do. Never in his life had he thought he would be able to act out his fantasy. _y/n_ leaned down and kissed him softly at first and then with more hunger and ferocity. Aaron reciprocated in turn. As their lips looked in a passionate heated kiss, _y/n_ moved her hands to the belt that kept his trousers in place over his trim hips. It wasn’t as hard as _y/n_ had imagined taking off his belt without looking. The cool metal of the clasp heated against your skin. You moved to his pant’s button and zipper next. _y/n_ didn’t want to wait around anymore and once his grey briefs and thick arousal were freed, _y/n_ started palming his erection with a steady hand. Once her hand started stroking him, Aaron let out a gasp. He opened his mouth enough for her to slip her tongue into his mouth. He breathed in her throat and had her make a small contented noise as she explored the well-known concaves of his mouth. _y/n_ would never consider herself a sex expert, but when it came to new positions or scenarios with intimacy and Hotch, she often found it helpful if she took the lead. Warming him up to the idea. Making him feel comfortable and safe before they kept doing whatever it was they were trying. Oftentimes Aaron would jump on board and take the reigns, which she adored. She loved it when he told her what to do, how to lie. Everything. It was one of Aaron’s most attractive traits.

_y/n_ pulled her mouth away from his and wrapped her hand around his cock, more steadily pumping his length. Aaron said her name as he started moving his hips to meet her pace. His body responded to her touch. _y/n_ smiled at him and moved away for a moment, pushing his chair back enough for her to kneel under his desk. Aaron pushed his hips up and let _y/n_ pull his pants down, exposing his cock to the cold air. Hotch took a few steadying breaths. He knew what was to come, _y/n_ gave some of the best head that he had ever had and the anticipation of her lips on her member had him panting already. He said, “Can you not kneel all the way down like that, love? I want to touch you while you’re dining me?” _y/n_ smiled, relishing the fact that he was already taking a small amount of control of the situation. She nodded and said, “Of course Aaron, anything you ask.” With his request in mind, _y/n_ got up on her knees. It was helpful because she needed the reach to be able to lean over and take his tip in her mouth. She swirled her tongue over the top and slit, sucking at it like some rare candy. Hotch groaned as she moved her head down his length slightly. _y/n_ took in his width and length with surprising ease. He was always surprised by her ability to take him. It only made her more attractive to him. As his head swam with pleasure and endorphins, he moved his own body forward and down a little. His head almost rested on her shoulder as he moved his long arm to feel between her legs and upper thighs. He slid his hand down and over between her skirt. As he started rubbing her clothed sex, _y/n_ moaned over his cock. She took a second before she kept moving her head further down him. Her mouth and tongue doing things to him that almost made him see stars. His left hand kept massaging her wet, clothed folds while his right pushed up her shift and kneaded her breasts in turn over her _y/f/c/a/s_ bra. Aaron could feel her nipples grow rigid under her bra and he moved his hand under the intimate article of clothing that covered her chest. He squeezed her right breast and squeezed her nipple. As _y/n_ started moving her head up and down his whole length, Aaron matched her pace with his hand on her clit, pushing and pulling sensations out of her. It turned out Hotch was so aroused, so excited that he kept moving his hand faster over her sex and clit, and _y/n_ kept up her own pace. Aaron panted and tipped his head back as he released some precome and she moved off him sucking it off of him. As she moved to take him in her mouth again, Aaron stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. _y/n_’s mind and body were also hazy with desire. Her entrance ached to be filled by Hotch more fully. His hand was amazing, but nothing beat him seating himself in her fully and then fucking her to the heavens.

Aaron could see this desire in her. A desire for him alone. Aaron pulled her onto shaky feet. He stood as well. He kissed her again, the beginning of stubble running over her chin and jaw. He pushed his pants and briefs fully off his legs and undid the side zipper of her skirt. He let it fall onto the beige carpet. He pulled back from her mouth and slipped his hands at the elastic of her stockings. He was too impatient to pull them down gingerly. Instead, he used just a bit of his strength to rip them down the center seam. _y/n_ let out an exhalation of breath. She knew it was going to get good now. Not that it hadn’t been good before, but she knew that it could get even better than his thumb and middle finger rubbing against her sex and clit. Aaron looked at her panties and noticed how they matched her bra. He murmured, “You had this all planned, didn’t you, you little devil?” _y/n_ gave him a wink and said, “Maybe just a little. You mad about it?” Hotch let out a little throaty growl and slipped his fingers under the band of her underwear. When they were on the floor, he moved to the desk. He pushed his files to the side along with the batch that _y/n_ had been working so diligently on a few minutes ago. He might desperately want to bend her over his desk, but he wasn’t so stupid to waste three good hours of work by having his files fly all over the place while he fucked _y/n_.

Once the forms were safely on the other side of the desk, Aaron grabbed her hips, turned her body 180 degrees, and then pressed her upper body flush to the hard dark wood of his desk. Hotch had unbuttoned her shirt and her skin felt cool against Hotch’s desk. She anticipated Aaron’s next move as he moved behind her slowly. Hotch pumped his throbbing length once or twice to ready himself. Another bead of precum moved to his tip and he wet his member with it. Even if he was ready and _y/n_ was ready, some of her wetness was even dripping down her thigh, Hotch was going to tease her still, as she had teased him. Aaron moved right next to her and slid his cock up and down her entrance, slightly pressing at the space that was begging for him. Aaron used his left hand to stroke over her weeping sex and _y/n_ moaned saying, “A-aron. Please. Please fuck me. Oh god.” Aaron looked at his length now coated in his and _y/n_’s excitement. It didn’t take more than her words for him to press himself into her fully with a measured thrust. _y/n_ let her out a breath and Hotch could feel her body press into the side of the desk. Aaron pulled out and pressed in again. _y/n_ let out a whimper and there was a slight squelching sound and he began to move in and out of her more quickly. Aaron's thick cock filled her fully and Hotch watched as he pushed in and out of her building his speed. The veins of his length ribbed her insides and _y/n_ almost let her feet go from under her, the desk and Aaron holding up her weight as he kept pressing into her with a relentless pace. _y/n_ could feel him fill her fully, pressing his whole member deep inside her. Aaron knew just how to move his hips to hit her sweet spot and she was panting and babbling in under a minute. Aaron moved one hand to her mouth whispering, “Shhh, now. We wouldn’t want to get caught, now would we?” _y/n_ wanted to protest and say, ‘You know no one is out there, Hotch,’ but her head was so full of lust, desire, and longing to let go. Aaron’s movements had her desire building and she knew Aaron could feel it too. Hotch picked up the pace, rapidly thrusting into her. He moved his left hand to her clit and let go of her mouth so she could let out a litany of sounds. As he kept his fast pace and circled her clit, her body pushed roughly against his desk with every thrust, she whimpered, “I...I’m gonna come, Aaron.” Hotch smiled and leaned down so his chest was flush with her back. His hand on her outer erogenous zone moved quickly and _y/n_’s walls fluttered and then contracted against his cock. _y/n_ cried out and let go of everything, letting the pure bliss of her orgasm overcome her. The sounds of her release had Aaron climax as well. He groaned as he pushed into her a few more times as he let his spent his ejaculation into her. Their shared sounds of pleasure filled the room and Aaron considered how this was better than he could have ever imagined. _y/n_ though spent, felt the same way.

Hotch took a moment to catch his breath and after a minute he let out a contented sigh. He pulled out of _y/n_ gently. As _y/n_ similarly let out a hum of happiness. She loved the way he was so gentle with her at the end of their intimate encounters. Aaron helped her stand and led her to the couch at the side of the room. Neither exactly felt like saying anything in the soft afterglow of their shared experience. Aaron had her sit on the couch and pulled moved back to his desk. He opened the left drawer and pulled out a pocket square that he rarely wore. He found the linen handkerchiefs too formal and stuffy. And as someone who came off as formal and stuffy already, he didn’t need a fashion accessory to add to the impression. But now, the fabric would come in handy. Aaron walked back to the couch with the confidence of a man who had performed very well. _y/n_ would have laughed at his cockiness if he wasn’t so damn good at sex. The first they had done it, she was so tight that it would have hurt if he hadn’t helped prep her very well. Now he fit her perfectly and he knew it.

She smiled lazily at him as he knelt down and gently cleaned her up. He loved her, but if his or her release started staging his furniture, it might lead to awkward conversations later. When he was done cleaning her body, he wiped himself. He raised his head and said, “Was that everything you wanted darling? You did very well by the way. You felt so good for me. I hope I was the same for you?” _y/n_ beamed and said, “It was everything I wanted and more. Thanks for indulging me. Aar. But I do think you should get out of this office. Being cramped up in here isn’t good for you mentally, sexually, or physically. So what do you say we get out of here and get an early dinner and watch a Christmas movie at my place, huh?” Aaron chuckled and folded the soiled handkerchief to the clean side facing out. He put it in his pocket and smoothed down his now very crumpled shirt. He grabbed his pants and underwear along with _y/n_’s skirt and panties. He tossed them over to her and they both changed. As Aaron zipped up his pants, he said, “Sounds like I good plan. These papers can wait till Monday morning.” Somehow _y/n_ always seemed to know what he needed, and he wasn’t going to fight her on it now. Not after what they’d just done. As _y/n_ put her clothes back on, he paced his briefcase and packed _y/n_’s ripped tights inside with his other work. He wouldn’t just throw those away in the trash by the door. As he did this, _y/n_ moved behind him and gave him a hug saying softly, “You know I really liked those tights, so I expect a replacement stat, mister.” Hotch chuckled and said, “You got it, _y/n_, but you know I couldn’t help myself. Not when you tease me like that.” There was a shared laughter as Aaron turned off his lamp, grabbed his and _y/n_’s bag, and opened the door for both of them. He locked the door to his office behind him and trailed _y/n_. He had suddenly grown an appetite and asked, “So, what type of food are you feeling.” _y/n_ thought about it as they descended the stairs. She took his hand and said, “How about _y/f/t/f_?” Aaron smiled and said, “Sounds great!” _y/n_ rested her head against Aaorn’s shoulder and contemplated how lucky she was for him, and for Freudian slips.

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d4adf4iry · 10 months

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“Mr Kennedy”

(Smut warning 18+, degradation, office au, quickie, secretary, oral, p in v.)

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your hand rested on the storage self in the closet that y’all were in, it squeaking ever so lightly with the thrust of Leon. His hand was over your mouth to keep your moans from overflowing out of you. If someone were to walk in you didn’t know what to do, you were quite literally fucking the cop that helped the president in the goddamn storage closet. But little did you know he was good at what he was doing. “Shhh baby I know” Leon whispered in your ear as he made his way to your neck his thrusts getting deeper. You moaned slightly. He stopped thrusting into you and you were confused by the lack of warmth that washed over you. “Wha” your words cut off to Leon moving in between your thighs, kissing them up to your sensitive clit. His hot breath fanned over your pussy as he dipped down into it, his tounge licking your lips. “Oh fuck” you panted your legs were shaking already. God damn Leon he knew how to tease you and this wasn’t the first time either. “Look at you already shaken up and I just pleased you ever so slightly” his voice slightly muffled between your thighs, he grabbed your right thigh pressing you down so he could have more access to you. “Fuck I can never get enough of you,your to intoxicating” he started sucking your clit relentlessly as if has never tasted you before. You felt you legs get weaker as you had to hold yourself up on his shoulder and the rack behind you. You big your knuckles are to try and not make too much noise. His fingers found that entrance as he fucked you like so. His fingers going in and out and licking and sucking your senstive bud. “Oh fuck fuck Leon I think I’m gonna cum Jesus” after you said that you came on his fingers. Heavy breathing was all was heard after your orgasm. “I’m not done with you yet, turn around.” You had no room to argue you liked seeing him like this he rarely showed his dominating side. You faced the shelf behind you. He got behind you and started thrusting himself inside you stretching you out. “You like my cock don’t you, you fucking slut.” your back arched in pleasure as he grabbed a fistful of your hair. “Y-yes” you moaned out. He felt his back pressed up against yours. You cupped your breasts as they bounced with ever movement he made. I liked doing these with him it was scandalous and someone could walk in at any second you both liked the thrill. “Leon I want you please” you panted. He groaned at your words. Your hand came down to your bud as you rubbed it getting extra overstimulated. He started whimpering as it felt like he was close. He pulled out and you got on your knees waiting for him to come. After he came you sucked his cock as your cheeks hollowed. He ran his hand down his face and his chest was moving up and down. He pulled your hair pushing you more into his cock. You gagged at his length he quickly came in your mouth again. After you guys were done you cleaned yourself up you made sure you looked appropriately. You fixed your striped skirt and he fixed his police gear. “Thank you Mr.Kennedy” you smirked as you walked out the storage closet.

(This one was kinda short since it was a “quickie” I guess LMAO anyways hope y’all enjoy <3)

Ps. I think I missed a few warning in the top 🧍🏽‍♀️

#resident evil #fanfic #writers on tumblr #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil 4 #re4make #re 4 remake #re 4 leon #leon kennedy resident evil #leon x you #leon x reader #leon kennedy smut #smut scenarios #resident evil smut #spotify

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inkys-anime-blog · 2 months

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One Piece Surfer AU

This was a long ramble session put together by myself and my friends Jordon, @fashionable-hamster , @incomingalbatross , and @thehappybaker .

If anyone wants to draw these or muse around in this AU, please feel free (and tag me!) We had so much fun coming up with these!

Things that are the Same

Devil Fruits are still a thing (mostly because it's really funny if they're surfers and can barely swim. They all wear inner tubes and water wings.)

Crew Compositions are also the same! They are now teams.

Sea Kings and assorted monsters are still here. They are, in fact, more common. The job of Life Guard is not only to keep people from drowning, but to fight monsters so your friends can surf in peace.

World Changes

Almost every dead character you can think of is alive. Because this is a fun, low stakes AU.

"King of the Pirates" is now "King of the Waves", you become a Yonko by being an Olympic Gold Medalist, you become "King of the Waves" by beating all of the Yonkos in a competition.

The goal of "World's Greatest Swordsman" has been changed to "World's Greatest Lifeguard." The way you move up in ranks for it is by competing in underwater feats of power (holding your breath, underwater wrestling, spotting and saving drowning people, performing rescue maneuvers.) It is all incredibly competitive and intense.

Doctors tend to pool supplies and set up a single medical tent, but more intense competitions mean they'll stay apart.

The Celestial Dragons have bought up most of the local public beaches. Surfing on them is considered illegal, but that doesn't stop any of the crews/teams.

The Marines are now local police who are trying to keep the surfers from the private beaches. Sometimes it escalates to fighting, but not too often. It's more like a race to surf before the police show up, it adds time and tension to competitions.

The Revolutionaries are a skateboarding gang who are committing actual crimes trying to bankrupt the city. They are treated with less attention than the surfers, somehow.

Strawhat Headcanons

The Thousand Sunny is a massive surfboard that all the team can fit on. They don't use it super often, but Franky made it for fun one day and they have a good time zipping around together.

Luffy is almost unchanged. He wants to be King of the Waves, he goes around recruiting buds to help that happen. He is more than willing to solve these problems by beating people up. It's Luffy.

Zoro is training to be the World's Greatest Lifeguard. He mostly focuses on paddling around and killing monsters that try to attack his friends, he's group protector in any AU. His backstory is similar as well, Kuina dying and leaving him her family life preserver. He and Sanji sit on the edge of the group surfboard, they're both very worried about their friends falling in.

Nami and Nojiko were illegally taken in by Bellemere. Nami has a supernatural sixth sense for when storms and strong waves are coming in, which was noticed by Arlong. Arlong threatened to reveal the illegal adoption to the police if she didn't come work for him and his team. Nami agreed, but once Luffy finds out, he contacts Whitebeard and get into a fierce legal battle to keep Nami and her family safe and away from Arlong. She's now living out the childhood she always wanted, spending time with friends and surfing instead of being under Arlong's control. Bellemere is running her tangerine orchard and shows up to their competitions a lot, mostly to cheer on her kid and hand out orange slices like a soccer mom.

Ussop runs a kid's swimming school! He's really popular because he's great with kids. People want to get their kids in love with swimming so they're less likely to impulsively eat devil fruits lolol. He's always wanted to be a surfer, and he jumps at the chance when Luffy comes their way. Kaya buys them fancy new surfboards and she's one of their most dedicated sponsors.

Sanji used to work in a five star restaurant, but ended up shifting to make his own top-class food truck so he can be with the crew and go to different competitions. Zeff sponsors the Strawhats so that Nami stops stealing the rival team's wallets to pay for gas money. (She still does, but less often now.)

Chopper is still a reindeer boy, and he wasn't able to go to normal school because of it. He was homeschooled by his parents, who are both doctors. He's enjoying his first taste of a real childhood with the Strawhats, and Hiriluk and Kureha come to what competitions they can.

Robin is a former CIA agent turned lawyer. She has gotten the Strawhats and teams they're friendly with out of SO many legal issues. She wears water wings on All of her Arms when she goes out to surf. She still does archeology on the side as a fun hobby.

Brook's backstory is mostly unchanged. He used to be on a great group of surfers, but when they were on a boat trip, their drinks were poisoned by a rival team. He washed up a skeleton by the Strawhat's van. He had made friends with Laboon, but since Laboon has faced some issues in the wild, he was moved by a wildlife conservation center. Brook is traveling the coast with the Strawhats to try to find him again, checking with every wildlife center they pass.

Jinbe is tired. He was a city council member, and left when it became horribly corrupt. He's reliving his old days of surfing with the Strawhats, and he's specifically helping Zoro be a better swimmer.

Non Strawhat Headcanons

Shanks and his crew run a nice little bar. They're renowned for their surfing skills, but they're holding back from competitions for awhile so the kids get their chance to shine. Shanks is known as "that guy who once surfed a tsunami so well he reversed it. Somehow."

Whitebeard is a CPS worker. He has worked at this tirelessly for decades, and ends up fighting a fierce legal battle for Nami, and then later Ace, both of which he wins!

Ace (which was actually how this entire thing started for me) is super competitive and travels around almost as much as the Strawhats do. He wears his hat surfing because of course he does. He's got to be very careful using his Devil Fruit, but he's pulled off some crazy stunts with it.

Buggy the Clown runs a water show with super talented performers; water aerialists, dolphins, even some surfing like the others! He is a terrible surfer but manages to fail upwards into winning an Olympic medal. Whoops!

Vivi is a mayor's daughter and is constantly campaigning for better protection for the local beaches. She's managed to get her hometown safe for the teams to compete at, but she doesn't have a lot of sway outside them, and she had to fight against a certain local business to get that far. She's studying abroad in Europe after she helped, and they miss her a lot :(

Crocodile (mentioned above with Vivi) owns a casino near the beach. Luffy hit him with a supersoaker of ocean water once for putting a hit out on Vivi. I have nothing else for him except "he makes crazy sandcastles"

Mihawk is the World's Greatest Lifeguard, and most of the time people practice perfect water safety around him because he's SCARY to be rescued by. Those eyes....

Most of the first mates (Zoro, Bepo, Killer) are training to be lifeguards. Their captains have devil fruits, they have to.

Corozon is the Heart Pirate's biggest supporter. He loves watching them compete. He's working with Bellemere in her orchard, they know each other from their old police days.

Blackbeard's favorite activity is snitching on other surfers so they get interrupted by the police. He also likes knocking people off their boards. He's never invited to these things, he just shows up.

Uta showed up once to cheer on Luffy, but Blackbeard dropped her location online. The beach got swarmed by fans and they had to cancel :( But she still comments on Nami's social media posts about the competitions and voices her support!

Gecko Moria owns a terrible "haunted water ride" experience and it's terrible and rundown. Kuma, who works for OSCHA, shows up to shut it down but the crew has already beaten up everyone there because someone was being a creep to Nami.

That's all for now! Might add more later as they come up!

Please please reblog <3 I want to hear people's ideas!

#one piece #one piece au #one piece surfer au #monkey d luffy #roronoa zoro #nami #ussop #black leg sanji #tony tony chopper #nico robin #soul king brook #cyborg franky #jinbe #whitebeard one piece

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testingcheats0n · 1 year

Text

AU where Dick Grayson talks non-stop about his family but people just don't fucking believe him. He sees Bruce on the TV and goes 'hey that's my dad :D' and half the police station groans and the other half is like 'sure bud, haha so funny don't we all want that?'. They all think that Dick is pushing an unfunny joke or is one of those stalker types, but they leave him be bc it's Dick and he's precious.

The truth is that Bruce is obsessive in his mission to keep the children out of the press, the public knows that he has children just not who they are (or how many there are). It's the family's second best kept secret, and it kinda sucks when they try to be honest with others because it's so unbelievable.

#bruce wane #batdad #batfamily #dick grayson

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charkyzombicorn · 28 days

Note

Accidental mob boss au

Modern au

Luffy is the target of multiple yakuza due to his connection to multiple high power people (ace - a meber of white beard crew. Dragon and crocodile and shanks. Along with being the grandson of a high ranking chief policeman’s (garp))

So in order to protect him, (crocodile, ace and shanks) Send a bodyguard to keep him safe. (Non of them know about the other doing this btw)

Shanks sends sniper king (usopp. Who uses his cover as a cowardly kid to hide his identity as teenager sniper)

Crocodile sends miss all Sunday (Robin, a killer assassin)

Ace asked Jinbe a powerful yakuza to keep and eye on Luffy (since Luffy lives in his territory)

Long story short. Somehow Luffy became a yakuza with former yakuza bosses (Jinbe and franky) serving under him and 2 would be assigns (Nami and chopper) as his new gang members.

Also Sanji was sent to whatch after Luffy by zeff and a favorite to garp. (And Luffy just found zoro dying on the street and decided to keep him like a stray dog)

I. Do you know how this has been festering in my brain, anon? Do you know?

Zoro is in fact Luffy's dog that's canon, Zoro decided to fuck with Mihawk (an assassin that's close with Shanks, he might be an undercover cop but Shanks doesn't mind everyone has flaws) because Mihawk was really good at Kendo back in the day and Zoro wanted to be The Best, used a real sword and got stabbed for it. He couldn't go to a hospital because he was wanted for assault on multiple police officers so Luffy took him home, threw a med kit at him and said Zoro was his now. Zoro would kill and die for this man

Nami wasn't Really an assassin, she was more like a crook, stole money, weapons, information from all the crime families to give to a budding crime family that branched away from Jimbe, because they had her sister. Luffy was a means to an end, Arlong put a price on his head three times what he was holding Nojiko for because Luffy was tied to almost everyone - and how could someone tied to every criminal in their city be anything but terrible? So she got close, she didn't mean to but she did and eventually she didn't want to hand him into Arlong because he wasn't who she thought, he helped her finish getting the money not even knowing what it was for. She tried paying Arlong, but he said money wasn't good enough, that Nami was seen fraternizing with the city's top bargaining chip and Arlong wanted him. Nami left, intent on finding another way, doubling the money she spent her life hoarding, tripling it, she would dissappear from Luffy's life because she would never stoop as low as Arlong - but then Luffy came to her. She had no choice but to hand him in because she couldn't play it off anymore, he went willingly, she got Nojiko, then Zoro and Nami teamed up to bust Luffy out, then Luffy forewent the stealth of the break out and beat the tar out of Arlong. Nami would kill and die for this man.

Luffy immediately recognized Usopp because they met as kids (back when Usopp was sure he was wimpy and useless, but Luffy just said he was cool) even if they hadn't seen eachother in a decade, and Luffy is immediately and adamantly like 'this is Usopp he's the best sniper ever we're keeping him because he's my best friend' and Nami and Zoro both look Usopp up and down like '... Sure...' because Usopp is all blubbery because Luffy hadn't even seen him do anything cool yet he was going purely off the kid that not even Usopp thought deserved the time of day, Luffy not only thought that kid was worth it, he had so much faith in that kid that he's sure the man he's seeing is the man that kid said he would be. Usopp would kill and die for this man.

Sanji thought Luffy was going to be a spoiled brat - and he definitely is. He also saved Nami and Zoro without a thought because they were his and Sanji isn't going to lie and say Luffy calling him his as well doesn't hit Sanji pretty hard. Sanji would kill and die for this man.

Chopper is Kureha's assistant - his parents were mostly absent, and pretty ableist (he's autistic and has chronic pain with his spine - part of why he's kinda tiny, also why he walks with a cane) and Hiriluk took him in for a while before he got sick, then Kureha took him in but only if he worked for her (he was happy for it, Kureha's a doctor - well she had her license revoked but that doesn't stop patients from crawling to her door from every crime family because she's neutral and an amazing doctor) he makes friends with Luffy pretty quickly because Luffy thought it was metal as hell that Chopper was a doctor at 14 (well he said 8 but Chopper loudly corrected him and Luffy said that was still super cool). Luffy also beat the absolute shitfuck out of a cop that was interrogating Chopper by shittalking Hiriluk (Walpol recognized Chopper) And Chopper? Chopper would kill and die for this man.

Robin got close to the crew pretty easily. She was surprised, especially since she knew who Usopp and Sanji were, but she wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. It was fun hanging around with them a while, watching these kids kill themselves for eachother, pretending she was a part of it. But she had a price on her head, and staying stagnant long enough made the wrong people notice. She tried to act like she betrayed her friends, but Luffy didn't listen, started causing havoc, getting hurt for it, getting the whole group hurt for it, and Robin tried to tell him she wasn't worth it but he just told her to say she wanted to live, and she did, so he made it so. Robin would kill and die for this man.

#one piece #Stray Dogs AU #I'll do Franky Brook and Jimbe later

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thestupidhelmet · 3 months

Note

AU T7S where Jackie Doesn't Exist on the Show

Season 1

Donna and Eric's transition from friendship to romance takes longer, giving Hyde more opportunities to interfere with the process. Eric grows more insecure that Donna might have romantic feelings for Hyde, not him, so he starts to back off. Donna takes this behavior as a sign that Eric wants to stay just friends.

Donna, however, makes clear to Hyde she only wants to be friends with him, and he finally gets the message when she dates David Milbank.

Hyde and Eric bond over their unrequited feelings for the same girl.

Kelso "dates" Pam Macy, who isn't at all monogamous. Still, Kelso loses his virginity to her at Prom. His Apollo Rocket of Love explodes on the launch pad, and Pam Macy tells everyone at school. Kelso can't get a date at Point Place high afterward. He's ridiculed by boys and girls alike, and he considers changing schools.

Fez is largely unaffected. He finds a different girl to fixate on, one who isn't in a relationship.

Season 2

David Milbank reveals his true interest in Donna is sex, not her thoughts or writing. She dumps him before they've gotten past first base.

Upset, Donna seeks comfort in Eric, who confesses that he's always liked Donna's thoughts. "In fact, I've always liked ... you."

Donna is shocked, happy, and pissed she didn't know this fact earlier. She asks Eric why he acted like he wasn't into her romantically. He says he thought she liked Hyde that way. "Hyde?" she says. "No, Hyde liked me. I liked you."

"You did?" Eric says. "I still do," Donna says, and they begin their romantic relationship.

Laurie, bored, has sex with Kelso in his van. But since he's not in a relationship, it's a one-time occurrence. Unfortunately, it adds fuel to Kelso's obsession with her. With his reputation at school in the toilet, he pursues Laurie to the point of stalking.

Laurie seeks help from Red, who not only threatens Kelso in the garage but also bans him from the house.

With all that's gone wrong in Kelso's life, he grows increasingly depressed. All his friends try to help, and the truth of Kelso's age comes out. He's eighteen.

Hyde suggests Kelso drop out of school, like most of Hyde's cousins did, and get a job. Donna says Kelso should get his G.E.D. at least. She, Eric, and Fez help him study for it and ultimately get his high school degree.

Living at the Formans' house has helped Hyde emotionally, but his nurturing instinct isn't being nurtured. He becomes more closed off and distant, despite giving support to Donna, Eric, and Fez when they need it.

Season 3

Donna and Eric have trouble navigating their misunderstandings without Jackie's advice and perspective. Hyde is helpful but not enough to make up for Jackie's absence. The resentments build up on both sides, and Donna and Eric break up under different circumstances than they do in "Promise Ring". Instead, they believe they're incompatible as a romantic couple.

Kelso enlists at the police academy after being pulled over for speeding. He believes becoming a cop because will negate his reputation for being a bad lover.

Fez's life is less stressful without chasing after someone (Jackie) who isn't interested in him romantically.

Hyde grows increasingly cynical after his dad (Bud) uses him to pay rent.

Season 4

Donna never dates Casey Kelso because Jackie isn't there to set them up. Donna and Eric date a string of people who they don't truly connect with.

Donna, though, grieving her mother's absence, leans on Hyde far more than she did on the show. Secretly, they start a sexual relationship. For Donna, it's a coping mechanism. For Hyde, it's much more. But Donna eventually connects to the emptiness she feels, and what follows is the grief she's been avoiding.

Hyde, without the insight of Jackie, resents Donna for using him and breaking his heart -- even though deep down he believed Donna hadn't suddenly fallen in love with him. He pushes past his own pain, however, and helps Donna and Eric reconcile.

Fez and Rhonda's relationship thrives without Casey's influence and Donna-influenced-by-Casey's confirmation of Casey's perspective.

Kelso sets fire to the Point Place Police Academy on Flare Day and is transferred to Kenosha.

Season 5

Eric and Donna work on their communication issues, among other difficulties.

Hyde moves out of the Formans' house once he turns eighteen, despite Red's reassurance and reasoning. After what went down with Donna, Hyde wants to run get away from the reminders of what he never really had. He leaves Point Place, and everyone is upset about it -- especially Kitty.

Fez and Rhonda consummate their relationship.

To honor Hyde, Eric, Donna, Kelso, and Fez spray paint his name on the water tower. But Eric, through Fez, learns Donna and Hyde were sleeping together last year. Fez says, "I'm happy you can put aside your anger at Hyde and do this for him." Eric says, "Anger? What anger?" Fez says, "Wow, you are even more secure than I thought! If Hyde had slept with my Rhonda, I would kill him."

This revelation tarts a fight between Eric and Donna. Fez and Kelso try to intervene, but Fez gets shoved off the water tower.

At the hospital, Fez's immigration status is discovered. Rhonda marries him so that he can stay in the U.S. and because she loves him.

Eric breaks up with Donna, feeling betrayed by both the fact she slept with Hyde and kept it a secret. He leaves Point Place after graduation to search for Hyde.

Season 6

Kelso and Brooke have sex at the Molly Hatchet concert, and Brooke becomes pregnant as a result.

Eric finds Hyde in Milwaukee. Hyde had gotten seriously hurt at his car mechanic job and needed a kidney transplant. Through this, his true paternity is discovered. W.B. is a match and gives Hyde a kidney.

Hyde's built a new life for himself with his newly discovered family. Eric confronts him about Donna, and Hyde explains the depression and terror and grief Donna was in after her mother left and she and Eric had broken up. "Think about it, man," Hyde says. "Under what other freakin' circumstances would Donna have sex with me? She was miserable."

With his new understanding and empathy, Eric forgives Hyde. Hyde both kept Donna from hurting herself with risk-taking behavior and helped her and Eric reconcile. Eric also lets go of any sense of betrayal he feels toward Hyde and Donna both.

Eric returns to Point Place and apologizes sincerely to Donna (and tells her he found Hyde, etc.) Donna apologizes, too. Not for sleeping with Hyde because better him than a stranger who could have hurt her, although she understands why her being with Eric's best friend hurt Eric. She's sorry for not being truthful with Eric and depriving him of the chance to make choices about their relationship based on the whole truth.

Eric and Donna reconcile, again, before going to college together.

Only Fez, Rhonda, and the Formans are left to help Kelso handle the fact he impregnated Brooke. Kelso, having learned of Hyde's whereabouts, drives to him in Milwaukee -- taking a leave of absence from the police academy.

Hyde sets Kelso to rights. W.B. also steps in, sharing how he wished he'd known he had a son, his grief at missing out on Hyde's upbringing, and sorrow for the trauma Hyde experienced at Bud and Edna's awful parenting.

This week with Hyde and his family convinced Kelso to be in his kid's life and prove to Brooke he's worth of it.

In the series finale, Betsy is born. Kelso holds her in the hospital room while Brooke looks on, tired but happy. Red and Kitty reunite with Hyde in Milwaukee. Fez and Rhonda decide to go to culinary school together so they can one day own a bakery. Eric proposes to Donna while they sit on the Vista Cruiser's hood.

Jukebox Ask Game

#that 70s show #that '70s show #jackie burkhart #eric x donna #michael kelso #steven hyde #fez #ask game #jukebox ask game #my meta #my essay #meta #essay #ficlet

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beesbeesdragons · 25 days

Text

B/W AU set in 1920s NYC

Emmet and Ingo are subway workers by day, and run a speakeasy out of an abandoned subway station by night.

Elesa is a budding silent film star, but she mostly performs on Broadway and models for Vogue and other fashion magazines. She loves to entertain, and she and Roxie have a rotation of who's leading the music in the speakeasy.

Roxie works in a music shop by day and is a retired spy. She specialised in poisons and was hunted down ruthlessly by the Central Powers before the war ended, where she moved to New York and befriended Elesa.

Lenora is an archeologist and historian. she was a nurse with the Red Cross during the war but changed career paths after that

Skyla is a pilot and aircraft engineer; she wants to fly from the continental US to Australia without refilling the tanks and wants to design a plane to do so, but until then she's working at a private airfield just outside the city.

Burgh is their local struggling artist, he draws newspaper cartoons and paints in his spare time. He also dabbles in poetry and moved to New York shortly after the invasion of Paris, which is where he was born. He likes NYC just fine but definitely misses Paris. He runs poetry nights at the speakeasy once a week.

Cilan, Chili and Cress work at a small bakery during the day which is owned by their parents. They serve food and tend the bar at the speakeasy.

Drayden is a local politician. He is vocally supportive of unions and the working class. He's Ingo and Emmet's uncle and Iris's guardian, so he often hangs around the speakeasy to chat with them. He took in Iris as his ward after her parents both died during the war. Her mother was a nurse and died of influenza, her father was a soldier and died in combat. Drayden was close friends with them and Iris' godfather, so he took her in so she wouldn't be sent to an orphanage.

Iris is 14 and is friends with the protag gang of Hilda, Hilbert, Nate and Rosa. They all go to the same school and hang out together. Cheren, Bianca and Hugh.

Team Plasma is an organised crime syndicate that wants to get rid of the speakeasy's community because they're all very good at interfering with them. N is Ghetsis's ward and also...sort of friends with the protag gang? He goes to their school but is a couple of years above them, but they're friendly enough. It's a small enough school that everyone knows everyone.

Alder is the one who provides the speakeasy with alcohol. he's also a local police captain and is trying to get rid of team plasma.

#the speakeasy is called the secret subway #secret subway au #submas au #black and white au #pokemon au #ingo #emmet #gym leader elesa #rest of the black and white cast

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sherifftillman · 2 years

Text

busy streets and busy lives • ralph penbury x reader

A strange day at work gets even stranger when you meet a man who claims he's from 1926. With no certainty as to when he can get back, you decide to take him in until that time arrives.

masterlist | prev. | next

Tags: Timewasters (series), modern!au, slow burn, mutual pining, idiots in love™, fluff, some angst, swearing and mentions of adult themes throughout, eventual adult content, alcohol content, penbury is a fanon surname

Word count: 5.8k

A/N: Thanks for all the love on chapter 1, gang! This one's a real slow burn so I hope you're all in for the ride, haha. Also, I had picked the date Ralph arrived at random based on the general timeline I have for this fic, but it was only when making the fake text screenshots that I realised that the following day may have been a major event in the UK, so I'll leave it up to you to decide whether or not Ralph was responsible for that one lmao.

Also!! Big, beeg love to everyone in the jq server for enabling, encouraging and basically co-writing this whole premise, but especially to @hawkinsbanishedhero whose one-off typo, as featured in this chapter, inspired the absolute monolith this fic has become. <3

You wake up to a shooting pain in your back and an ache down one side. You groan as you stir into consciousness; for years you’ve always been able to pride yourself on the ability to sleep literally anywhere perfectly fine, you’d never understood why your friends always complain about back pains and knee pains when you’re all still relatively young, but now you get it.

You manage to pull yourself to standing and stiffly make your way to the kitchen to make yourself some breakfast. You look over at your closed bedroom door, wondering whether to wake Ralph up before you go to work. You don’t have to be there for opening, at least, but you do hope he’s not one to lay in for too long. Besides, the earlier you can get in to catch up on admin stuff before Head Office complain at you, the better.

As though he could read your thoughts, the door opens and a very sleepy Ralph emerges, rubbing his eyes to adjust them to the sunlit room. It’s positively adorable. “Morning,” you smile at him. “Sleep well?”

“Ah, good morning!” Even through his yawns, his voice remains very prim and proper. “I slept delightfully, apart from the occasional din coming from outside. I only noticed that when I was already awake, though.”

“Yeah, perks of being in South London, police sirens are pretty much 24/7 here. You get used to it,” you shrug, and Ralph looks horrified, ignoring your silent offer to make him a cup of tea.

“So, crime just happens? Everywhere? And it’s all just par for the course?!” he asks in shock. You nod, and he frowns. “I don’t think I want to leave the house.”

“You might need to someday, bud,” you point out, still making him one just in case. “I need to go to work, and you might end up going stir-crazy in here all the while,” you gesture at the four walls of your living-kitchen space.

“Yes, it is rather… Cramped in here,” Ralph comments with an upturned nose, though he takes the cup of tea that you slide over to him happily enough.

“Yeah, well. This is how far £900 a month gets you,” You shrug as you take your first sip, and Ralph chokes on his.

“I beg your pardon?!” he sputters out. “Ni- Nine hundre- How much is that really worth?!”

Nodding silently, you hold a finger up and take your phone out. As seems to be routine whenever you and Ralph learn about the stark differences between your time and his, you take your turn to react, almost choking and spitting out your mouthful. “Nineteen pounds?!”

“Well, that still sounds rather extortionate to me!” Ralph replies with wide eyes.

You walk over to where you had last thrown off your jacket and dig out your purse, taking out a £20 note and handing it to Ralph. “This, right here, would have been enough in your day to pay for this whole flat for a month.”

Again, Ralph scrunches his nose in disgust. “I rather feel as though you’re being swindled.” He holds the money up, turning it over and over in his hands. “Is this what money looks like nowadays?!”

“Yeah! Here,” you empty the monetary contents of your purse out onto the kitchen counter. You explain what each note and coin equate to. “I’ll leave them here in case you need to go to the store and get something. C’mere,” you wave him over to the window, pointing down below to a row of shop fronts at the bottom of another estate of flats. “There, on the corner, that’s a supermarket. It’s like, a greengrocers, a pharmacy and a clothing store, all in one. Then, next to it is the gardening store, my number one money sink.” You gesture to the houseplants that adorn the room.

“You do grow a lot of plants,” Ralph muses, smiling to himself as he gently holds a monstera leaf.

“All legal stuff, I promise,” you laugh. “But, yeah. Landlords don’t allow us to have pets, and so I’ve gotta have something to take care of. Of course, if I’d have known I’d be adopting a man born in the Victorian era, I might not have spent so much…”

Ralph, now more awake, bounces on the balls of his feet. “I-I can take care of them if you would like! Our gardener used to teach me all about how to water plants. It came in handy, being out in the garden sometimes. Much… quieter, out there,” Ralph falters, running the leaves between his fingers.

You place a sympathetic hand on his shoulder, “Wanna talk about it?”

He takes a deep breath in as his shoulder tenses up under your touch. “Oh, no, it’s quite alright, you’ve got enough on your plate as it is!”

“Okay. Well, if you ever want to talk about anything, I’m more than happy to hear you out,” you rub your palm against him in a single circular motion before pulling away. “Don’t feel like you have to bottle things up around me, okay?”

Ralph chuckles, though there’s no amusement in it. “Oh, it’s fine, honestly, I’ve no trouble with bottling things up. Rather, it’s the fact that I don’t that leads to most of my problems!”

“Okay. You know what you’re happy to share, I’m not gonna push you. But don’t make yourself sad unnecessarily, ‘kay?” You hold your little finger out. “Here, I want you to pinky promise me.”

This time, Ralph does crack a smile. “Pinky… Promise?”

“Yeah!” you grin. “Like, you know how usually big decisions are made with a handshake to make them official?” Ralph nods. “Well, little decisions that still require a commitment are usually made with a pinky promise. It’s like a handshake, but only linking your little fingers. So, pinky promise me you’ll always tell me if there’s something I can help you with? This whole mess is scary for both of us. But we’re in it together.” You smile softly at Ralph, and he returns it. In the early morning light, you can see freckles bouncing off of his face. Of course he has freckles.

Ralph sticks out his little finger, too, and you wrap yours around his for a moment before letting go. “That was… Fun,” his ears tinge a slight pink.

“It was!” you grin. “Now, what would you like for breakfast? I’ve got cereal, I could cook you some eggs and bacon. Or, ooh, there’s one more shop I can show you!” You point out the last one in the row. “That’s a bakery. We can go pick up some fresh pastries if you wanted those, too.”

“Whatever is easiest for you,” Ralph insists. You pour him some cereal and milk in a bowl, stick a spoon in it and hand it to him, offering him to join you on the sofa.

“Okay, so while I’m gone, I obviously don’t expect you to sit here twiddling your thumbs until you get back. Now, this thing here, it’s called a television. Sometimes called a telly, sometimes called a TV. This,” you brandish the control at him, “is called a remote, it’s how you control it. You know how you could project films and stuff onto a screen, in your day?” Ralph nods. “This does that without needing a projector. And you can get all sorts of shows and films on there. I wouldn’t recommend you watch the news, just because… Well, you know why,” you pull a face and he nods slowly. “But I’m sure you’ll find something you’ll like, there’s enough out there, that’s for sure.”

“Okay, so the T… V… I can watch people perform on here?” Ralph asks, and you nod. You show him how to flick through channels, and his eyes light up. “Fascinating!”

“And if you want to listen to music, there’s a special speaker, here,” you point to your Amazon Echo. “It has a name, and you can talk to it. So you could say, Alexa, play me some jazz,” you hold your finger up to tell Ralph to wait as the speaker flashes blue.

“Playing songs from playlist Jazz Classics,” the smooth robotic voice tells you, and sure enough, the room fills with the sounds of brass and percussion working in an upbeat harmony.

Ralph absolutely giggles in delight. “Marvellous! What a spectacular creation! And I could ask it to play any sort of music?”

You nod, telling the Echo to stop. “You can even tell it to play music based on what mood you’re in. So, if you need to wallow for a bit, you can have some sad songs to listen to, or if you’re feeling high-energy, you can ask for songs to match that. That should tide you over,” you nod as you take his bowl and yours to the kitchen sink. “I’ll be back around lunchtime to drop you off some more clothes and I’ll get you some lunch too, but if you want a snack in between, feel free to make yourself a sandwich, or…” Another quick Google search tells you toasters were around in 1926. “Or toast! You could make some toast, if you wanted. We’ll go food shopping soon and get more specific snacks for you, but I gotta get going.” You throw your jacket on.

“But what about your money? What if you have to pay for something?” Ralph asks, concerned.

“Don’t worry, mate, I’ve got it covered. That’s yours, yeah?” You point to the kitchen counter. “You can use it however you want when we go out. Just… Don’t go crazy, okay? I don’t exactly break the bank.” You throw your jacket on and wave him goodbye, “See you at lunch!”

Once you leave the flat, Ralph suddenly feels completely stranded. He tries to drown it out by pressing buttons on the “remote” until something shows up. It’s a show about people buying houses that are bare, and fixing them up to sell on. Ralph feels as though they end up looking worse, but he understands why he would feel that way. He just doesn’t understand the modern style, that’s all. It’s not their fault that taste clearly deteriorated over time. Then he watches a show all about “antiques”, though again, it takes him a while to acclimate to recognising certain pieces of furniture as items he’s witnessed being sold in stores just before he left for the army. He wonders, if he keeps watching, will there be an item that once belonged in Penbury House?

His mind wanders back to that comment you had made yesterday. Penbury House. A home that had been in the family name for generations upon generations, now a lowly bookstore. What could have possibly led to it being lost? Were there truly no more Penburys? Had Victoria gone absolutely mad and lost the entire family fortune? Was his accidental trip through time the catalyst to the death of the Penbury name as it was once known? Well, wouldn’t Mother and Father have a lot to say about that. Typical Ralph, can’t hold onto anything. Not even the estate tied to him by his last name, the only thing giving him any purpose.

He realises he needs a distraction. Something to keep him busy. You had mentioned something about toast, the kitchen staff had been very excited to receive a toaster oven not long before Ralph left. He remembers helping the cook, who didn’t know how to read, understand the instructions. It only toasts one side at a time, Ralph knows this. Spurred on by his pride, he finds the bread and puts it in the toaster.

As he’s trying to find the right button, switch, dial, lever - there’s so many extras on here, which one does he touch? - Ralph begins to get overwhelmed again. Echoes of his parents’ quick deflections, telling him to go ask the staff. The staff telling him that they’re far too busy to entertain children - other than the nanny, of course, who also made it very clear that she was only tending to Ralph’s needs because she was paid to do so. Victoria finding the art of making friends becoming second nature to her, and yet not to him for some reason. It’s not fair, he was just like her. So what made people want to be her friend and not Ralph’s?

Head swimming as the toast pops up, he remembers to turn it around to make sure it cooks on both sides - not realising that both sides had already cooked quite well. Soon, a strange smell starts to fill the flat. Then smoke quickly starts billowing out of the toaster. Ralph, terrified, slowly starts backing towards the door. Then an alarm of sorts goes off. Ralph wrenches the door open and backs out, his moon-wide eyes staring in horror.

Someone from the flat opposite opens the door and starts yelling, running in to unplug the toaster oven, pick up some… Tool that clamps together when they press it so, use it to take both slices out to throw them onto the counter. Ralph watches, back pressed to the wall as though he's tethered there, as this brave soul opens as many windows as they can before marching out to him, coughing their lungs out. "The fuck is wrong with you?! Who are you?! Are you supposed to even be here?!"

Ralph finds himself too stunned to speak. The neighbour rolls their eyes. "Do you at least know the person who lives here?" Ralph nods. "We'll see about that."

Being at work again, ironically, feels like it's been a century despite it only being a day. But the floor is running smoothly, everybody's here and working just great. You're even on track to finish all your admin stuff at long last, when - your phone rings as your neighbour's name pops up. You answer it, confused as to why they would possibly need to call you. “Hello?”

“You dating a dickhead, by any chance?” You hear their voice, a constant panicked hooting that - despite you having just met him - you could easily place as Ralph hyperventilating, and your smoke alarm in the background.

You sigh, “Not dating, but my… An old family friend is staying. Proper sheltered guy, sounds like a massive Tory. Is he okay?”

“Sheltered to the point of not knowing how a fucking toaster works?! I should call the fucking police on him for endangering the whole block!”

“No! No, please, I - Like I said, he’s just very… Look, I don’t have time to go through his life history with you -” read: I don’t have time to bullshit something right now - “but can you just… Keep an eye on him while I get back? I promise, he’s not bad, he’s just…”

“An absolute idiot?”

“Yeah…” You sigh.

“Alright. But only because you’ve been so good about keeping my cat secret.”

“I’ll buy Cheese her favourite tuna on my way home as a thank you!” you squeal in relief as you hang up.

You quickly ring up some clothes in the same size as the ones you’d given Ralph last night, explain to your staff that there’s an emergency at home and to call if they need anything - but please, god, don’t need anything, you think that last part to yourself.

Grateful you took your car this morning, you’re able to get back in a matter of minutes. You run into the supermarket to grab a can of tuna, a toothbrush for Ralph and, in a stroke of genius you’d had on the drive, a SIM card. You manage to successfully pay for everything - thanking whatever's out there that your phone's wallet system actually co-operated with the self-checkout for once - and run everything back to the flats, wanting to prioritise getting back to Ralph over getting the car into the right car park. You can do that once your poor neighbour is relinquished of their Ralph-sitting duties.

Once you get to your floor, you see your door still propped open, and your neighbour sat in their open doorway. With a relieved sigh, you fish out the can of tuna from your carrier bag and hand it over. “I will supply as much of that, and anything you want, as thanks for all this. Please don’t be mad at him -”

They raise a finger to interrupt you and lean over, revealing Ralph sitting on the floor of their flat, absolutely beaming as Cheese the cat paces in front of him, rubbing her head and body against his knees at every chance she can get. Ralph even pets her on occasion, which she takes happily.

Your face drops. “How - I have to use that tuna just to get a sighting of her when I come round and feed her!”

Your neighbour shrugs. “I’m just down here because I’m still convinced she’s doing it to lure me into a false sense of security -” You laugh with them at that, and they sigh in resignation. “But look at him. He’s harmless, isn’t he?”

You nod. “He’s just… Not used to living life on his own.”

They rasp as they stand up. “That’s an understatement. What, was he in some sort of imprisonment?!”

You shake your head. “I don’t even know. I just know that he wanted to get out of where he was. And he ended up here, with me.”

“You’ve got your work cut out for you, then.” A look of realisation dawns over their face as they grin at you knowingly. “Isn’t your flat a one-bed -”

“I am sleeping on the sofa!” You point at the pillow and blanket that still remain strewn over the back of your couch, just about in view of where your neighbour had kept open to keep watch of the flat. Your neighbour laughs as your cheeks turn pink. “I’m not expecting him to stick around, so I’m toughing it out until he can find his feet.”

“Yeah, well,” they shrug. “Just teach him how to use things in a way that doesn’t involve committing arson, alright?”

Ralph finally notices that you’re stood in the doorway, and the delight on his face immediately turns to shame. He stands and bows his head, quickly heading out and into your flat, not making eye contact with you. You frown, though nod a final thanks to your neighbour who thankfully nods back in understanding, and follow him in. “Hey, you alright?”

“I have failed you,” Ralph says simply, his back turned to you.

You walk over to him, deciding he probably doesn’t want physical contact just yet. “No, you didn’t, I did. I should have left instructions, it’s not your fault you didn’t know how it worked.”

“Is it all ruined?” he asks in a small voice.

You put your bag down on the kitchen counter to look at the toaster and shake your head, throwing the burnt toast away. “It’s absolutely fine, Ralph. Promise.” You lean down until you can make eye contact with him and offer him a smile. “Need a hug?”

Ralph, looking on the verge of tears, nods and you walk over to him with your arms outstretched. He buries his face in your shoulder as you feel his breaths become more and more regulated. You smell the smoke still clinging onto his shirt and tap his shoulder to get his attention. Once you’re out of his embrace, you can’t help but wish you’d lingered just a moment longer. You empty out the shopping bag you’d brought in, telling Ralph, “I bought you some new clothes. And a toothbrush. And something else I’m going to show you later. Go have another shower, get that smell out of you.”

While he’s in the shower again, you go to your junk drawer, thankful that you’d decided not to throw away your old phone when you upgraded through your contract. Putting the new SIM card in, you put your old phone on charge and start Ralph-proofing it. You delete all apps except for Google, so that he can find things out for himself. You’d tell him about Alexa’s capabilities there, too, but you feel as though Ralph isn’t quite ready to understand it can’t answer everything. Not like the internet can. While he's somewhat safe in the shower, and while the phone charges enough to power on, you quickly make sure your car isn't getting towed. That would just be the icing on the cake today.

Still, once you're back in the flat, all that stress seems to ebb away when he comes out of the bathroom. “You look smart,” you chime as he walks out wearing the outfit he’d chosen for himself from the clothes you'd provided: a brown plaid shirt and some jeans - you'd overestimated to be safe, but they didn't appear too baggy. Enough for a belt to manage, but they could fit better.

“Well, I couldn’t find a - a suit to co-ordinate anything with, or a tie, so I’ve had to make do. I hope this is suitable enough,” he brushes his shirt down with his hands and fiddles with the collar.

“It looks great, Ralph,” you reassure, waving him over. “Now, this is gonna be a really big thing I’m going to be teaching you about now, so we’ve gotta focus up, okay?”

You teach him how to send a text message to you, the only contact in the phone now. You teach him how to call you. You have him practise calling by going to your room and waiting for him. He gets all giddy when he’s figured it out. You teach him that if typing is difficult, he can press a button, speak into his phone and the words will come up. You also tell him that if he taps the last square on the screen, and types in a question, it’ll tell him everything he needs to know.

Once that’s out of the way, you remember something. “Ah, shit. Uh, hey, Ralph, I’m supposed to be going over to my friend’s place tonight for dinner. If you want, you can join us, or I can cancel -”

“No, please don’t cancel on my account! Oh, but I can’t be trusted on my own here, can I, oh blast…” Ralph falters, but you once again put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Nah, don’t be silly, you can come with, it’s fine.” You send the group chat a message:

“They say they can’t wait to meet you! All’s good,” you grin.

“It certainly isn’t, what about your job?” Ralph asks with a frown.

You sigh. "Let me make you lunch, I'll pop back in to finish my stuff. It's been a slow one and I've got a good team on so hopefully they understand if I need to dip early to come back to you. Literally, just text me or call me if you need anything, promise?" Ralph holds out his little finger and you link it with an affectionate smile. "I'll leave the spare key out here on the counter if you want to leave. And anything you want an answer to straight away, that I might not have time to answer, you can tap that last square on the main screen and type in the box, okay?" Ralph nods. You make the pair of you some sandwiches and take yours on the road with you, fishing out your spare key and showing Ralph where you're putting it ("just in case").

By the time you've driven to work, you have a notification on your phone, which you finally read once you're back in the office:

Once you're finally done with admin stuff, for the time being, you go back out onto the floor to check on your team. You fill them in on an old family friend coming to stay, he had a bit of an unfortunate incident with a kitchen appliance, all is well but you're keeping your phone on you just in case. They, naturally, want photos and details, which you promise them soon. When you notice you haven't heard from him in a while, you text him:

Your coworkers watch you with amused concern as you go from snorting with laughter to looking at your phone in horror:

Opting to simply wave them all off rather than try to explain what you'd just witnessed over the past half an hour, you help your sales assistants out as much as you can until you feel another buzzing in your back pocket. Half-terrified at what Ralph could possibly text next, you brace yourself:

You let out a stressed breath as you send that last one, and finally, your team wear you down. You explain that your new temporary housemate now has free reign to leave the house, and after the events of the morning, you'd started to regret letting him. When you tell them all that he's 25 (which technically isn't a lie, he's got the body of a 25 year old), they assure you that even the most simple-minded of men surely could only navigate so far. Still, you can't help but pace the shop floor anxiously, refolding shirts and reorganising displays, until:

Laughing with relief, you excuse yourself for the day. You tell the team that you feel awful for leaving them, but they seem to understand that you have a greater purpose ahead of you.

You call Ralph to tell him that you're on your way home, mostly to make sure you don't still hear the sounds of the street behind him. Thankfully, there seems to be some jazz music playing in the background, so he must have figured out how to get music playing, too.

You unlock your door to see Ralph humming along to a tune, wiggling himself around rhythmically as he sprays the leaves of some budded flowers with water. He acknowledges you with a wide, genuine smile. "Hello!" He singsongs. "I thought I'd spruce them up a little before they go to their new home. Just a couple of African Violets, the shopkeeper said. The ones already in bloom on display looked quite wonderful."

It's not that you're not happy to finally see him excited about something he knows about already, but this is the same man who almost burned the whole flat down making toast just hours ago. Still, look at him. It's nice to see him acclimating.

Since Anna doesn't live too far away, you and Ralph walk over to her flat. He's holding his plants and looking extremely proud of himself, until someone almost walks into him and he's suddenly pulled back into the reality of the streets of modern London. His big eyes dart around as he desperately looks out for danger, wrapping his arms around his gift protectively. You take him by the cuff on his wrist and guide him, weaving through strangers who couldn't care any less about their surroundings.

You hadn't told Anna to expect a gift today, and so she seems thrilled to meet Ralph and take the plants out from his grip. He immediately follows her to start babbling on about what the shopkeeper had said were the best conditions to keep them in. Once she's finally able to set them down, Ralph is still tailing her, looking expectantly for more reaction. Amused and slightly confused, Anna reaches up to pat Ralph on the head. He giggles and rushes over to you. You and Anna share a look before you lead him to meet the rest of your friends.

Scott, Connor and Grace all greet Ralph enthusiastically, and he seems to be bursting at the seams at the prospect of so many people being happy to meet him. He stays relatively quiet as you catch up with your friends.

"So, Ralph…" Scott starts. He goes back to looking terrified. "How are you settling in living with this one?" he shoves your shoulder, and you bat him away, playfully flipping him off.

Ralph looks taken aback at such a casual display of vulgarity, but he continues, "Well, it's only been for the one night, and there's certainly a lot to learn about… This… London," you can tell Ralph doesn't lie well, and appreciate that he's trying to word things in as honest a way as possible. “But, your friend here is a remarkable host and teacher,” he nods, smiling to you. It’s up there with one of the strangest compliments you’ve ever received, but it makes you blush nonetheless.

Anna asks for some help in the kitchen, and while Connor is the first to stand up, Scott pushes him back down with a slowly emerging smile on his face, looking directly at you. “Why don’t you give us the chance to get to know Ralphie here?”

You narrow your eyes, “Why do you say that like you’re in your villain arc?”

He laughs, immediately softening. “I just wanna know what makes him tick. Get to know what he really thinks, y’know?”

Ralph’s eyes dart between the two of you. “Rest assured, I have to reason to lie about anybody here in the slightest!”

“I’m just yanking your chain, Ralphie,” Scott laughs, though Ralph is not amused.

Connor rolls his eyes, “Don’t let him put you off us, Ralph. You can get to know us, too, without a certain someone embarrassing us in front of their new friend,” he pulls a face as he points to you with his thumb.

Ralph grins with excitement, his feet running on the spot where he sits. “Do you have a lot of tales to tell between you, then?”

“Oh, we’ve known each other for years. Went to school together.” You explain as you stand, following Anna’s anguished look from her kitchen door.

Ralph licks his lips, sadness dawning on his face. “Does that mean you all knew Lauren, too?”

Scott pulls a face, “How do you know Lauren, of all people?!”

Quickly assigning yourself as damage control, you pipe up, “Before he came to me, when he was living elsewhere, he met Lauren, Nick, Jase and Horace.”

“And yet he only mentioned Lauren…” Scott teases.

“Would you stop?” Grace slaps Scott’s shoulder as he laughs, moving over to accompany Ralph, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly. “Clearly things didn’t work out. Her loss, mate.”

Even Connor gets in on the teasing as he snorts with laughter while pointing at you. “What a twist of fate, remember when Nick -”

“You know I never actually asked him out, right? I wussed out at the last minute and just told you all that he turned me down,” you interject, to almost everyone’s groans.

“Nah, that makes sense,” Anna calls from the doorway. “Explains why you’re still such a chicken these days. Speaking of chicken,” she ushers you into the other room hurriedly.

As your friends grill Ralph on what he knows about you so far (“Very little, I’m afraid!”), what his intentions in London are (“Sort of making it all up as I go along, really!”), and his tastes (“I’m really not quite sure, um, I’m quite new to all of this… Modern… I’ve always known the classics, you know?”), you help Anna with her final preparations.

“So, how long d’you think you’re gonna keep him around for?” Anna asks.

You shrug, “It’s not really up to me. It’s whenever he’s ready to go back home, I guess.”

“I wonder where home is for him,” Anna frowns, and you shrug, focusing on your task. “He’s so… Out of touch. I know Scott was out of line guessing he’s escaped from a cult,” she mouths the word, “but, like, would him going back home really be the best thing?”

“Babe, you’ve known him for all of five minutes, and all you know about him is that he bought you some plants.”

“Exactly! You two are made for each other,” she muses, to which you grab a tea towel to flick at her.

“I’ve only really known him a day, myself,” you counter.

“And still you let the man live with you,” Anna raises her eyebrows at you.

You shrug again, “I dunno, he’s harmless, i’nt he?” You look over at him, a trace of wistfulness in your gaze as you watch your friends tap his phone for him, pointing things out to him. “I guess we’ll just see what happens.”

Once everything is dished up, you go out to the other room to call them all to pick up their meals. “Hope you haven’t traumatised Ralphie too much,” you comment.

“Not at all!” Ralph beams. “Look at how many new people I have to call and to text message now!” He shows you the addition of your four friends’ numbers in his contact list.

“That’s great, Ralph,” you nod with an affectionate smile. “Now let’s go eat. Sorry none of your favourites are on the menu tonight, mate.”

“Ooh, what are your favourites?” Grace asks.

“Oh, anything with aubergine on the side is always a five-star meal for me!” Ralph grins, and Connor and Scott snort with laughter.

“Hey!” Anna scolds. “No vulgarity at the dinner table, please!”

Ralph frowns. “What is it that’s so vulgar about aubergines?!”

You see multiple people start volunteering themselves to teach him, and hold your hand out to stop them all. “Ralph, there are some questions that you’re better off finding the answers to all by yourself.”

Ralph gasps and points at you, “By using my phone!” You click a finger gun back at him in affirmation. He excitedly taps out a sentence - part of you wants to double-check for him, but you don’t want him to be entirely dependent on you, and besides, he’s a grown man - and frowns at his phone. “Hm, perhaps it takes a while for it to find the answer.”

You groan, “Has the data not kicked in yet? Sorry, that’s on me.”

Dinner goes by delightfully. Of course your friends would make Ralph feel at home. They are home. You wouldn’t even be able to tell amongst the table that one of you was actually from old money - really old money, at that. After dinner, everyone practically fights over getting to play their favourite songs to see how he reacts to them. You could cry every time you see how genuinely happy Ralph looks - though you didn’t want to pry too much behind his back with Anna, you are curious about his life back home. He doesn’t seem too happy thinking about the past, and if he’s so hung up on Lauren, who he barely knew, there can’t have been much luck with any other relationships. Maybe you’ll get to learn more about him. Maybe you won’t have enough time.

But, for now, you’ll happily take the arm he extends out to you as the song changes, laughing as he twirls you amongst the friend group you’ll happily share with him, for however long he needs them.

next chapter

#ralph timewasters #ralph timewasters x reader #ralph timewasters x you #ralph timewasters fanfic #ralph timewasters imagine #ralph penbury #ralph penbury x reader #ralph penbury x you #ralph penbury fanfic #ralph penbury imagine #ralph timewasters fluff #ralph penbury fluff #bsbl #fic: bsbl #*myfics

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zephrunsimperium · 6 months

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Okay so I've been thinking a lot about what I want to draw cause I really really want to art but I've found myself in an inspiration drought after Inktober. And I was like, "I want to draw stuff from me and @ch4rl13-ch40s's AU but I don't think people on tumblr would love that" and then I realized that I should take my own advice and draw what I want dammit!

Zeph's Human Bill AU: A Summary

I will provide context for each individual drawing, but here's a summary of the AU beneath the cut. I've made it as brief as possible, but it is long please read it I spent hours on it. It's also BillFord stuff, I know this is primarily a FiddAuthor blog.

TW for religious trauma, child abuse/neglect, and drug use/addiction.

Part I: Bill's Backstory

William Cipher was born in the year 1951 in middle of nowhere Oregon. Shortly after entering kindergarten in 1957, Bill received an autism diagnosis (or what was autism in the 50s) and his mother was distraught, especially so because the local pastor told her the autism was caused by a demon possessing him.

Bill's mother quickly pulled him out of kindergarten to "home school" him and broke his leg to keep him from leaving the house. Bill would spend the majority of the next 7 years alone in the attic, reading old books left from the house's previous owners, favoring the thick and dusty math textbooks over the rest. Any time he got to leave the attic, he would collect things - anything to call his, random objects like bottle caps, spare change, pieces of thread, rocks - a habit that would later develop into kleptomania.

Bill grew extremely malnourished with a leg that never healed right. His father rarely interacted with him, but his mother made sure that Bill understood he was corrupted and needed to heal the only way anyone could - through Catholicism. Of course, as time passed, Bill didn't get "better" so his mother got angrier and angrier while Bill's anxiety got worse and worse, his religious rituals developing into crippling OCD. Triangles and the number three in particular became something of a holy symbol of the trinity to him. Arranging objects into threes, drawing triangles on himself and his possessions, counting by threes during panic attacks...

One day, Bill lashed out after his mother discovered the items he'd pilfered from downstairs and tried to take them away along with his precious books. As punishment, his mother splashed acid on his face, an injury that blinded his left eye. In his anger, out of pure impulse, Bill started a fire, fully intending to burn the house down with his parents inside. But while he waited outside, hearing their dying screams, 14 year old Bill realized too late that he regretted it. The police and firemen discovered him nearly catatonic outside the smoking building.

Part II: Backupsmore

After being passed around the foster system, Bill finally graduated high school. Grade school had not nearly been the utopia Bill was hoping it would be, but he still had a little bit of hope left that college would be a bit better. Though he didn't remember much from his childhood, his memories teaching math to an old teddy bear inspired him to declare a major in mathematics education.

Although Bill initially regarded his roommate warily, it didn't take long for him to find common grounds with Stanford Pines. The two bonded over being labeled freaks as children and found comfort in the strange new experience of being understood and seen. Eventually, after battling some internalized homophobia, the two started a secret romance

Unfortunately, all good things come to an end. Summer separated the two lovers and in the terror of being alone, Bill turned to hard drugs to cope. Although he was happy to see Ford again their sophomore year, hiding his budding addiction became a constant anxiety. And to add to his paranoia, Ford made a new friend out of Fiddleford Hadron McGucket. Bill despised the skinny blonde southerner immediately, terrified that Ford would replace him. After months of tension and open hatred between the two, Bill's homicidal impulses reared their ugly head again and he broke Fiddleford's arm. He would have done more, but Ford was able to separate the two. Naturally upset, Ford initiated a roommate swap as soon as he was able.

Part III: Gravity Falls

Bill graduated college out of pure spite and moved back to Oregon since it was familiar. Bill's students there had very mixed opinions of him. Sure, he was a little creepy and his dark humor wasn't for everyone and everyone had a different story to explain his limp and his eye patch, but one thing was undeniable: if you wanted to learn complicated mathematics, he was the best teacher you could hope for. Students from several small Oregon towns took his class for college credit.

After four years however, Bill's teaching career would come to a screeching halt when an accidental meth overdose landed him in the hospital. Unable to find any family or valid emergency contacts, Ford was contacted. Though it was not his initial plan upon being summoned without warning, pity and the softening of memory over time drove Ford to pay Bill's bail for drug possession and take him in with the hopes of keeping him clean.

It only takes a week for Ford and Bill to fall back into their old romantic patterns which come with mixed feelings; Bill is terrified of being abandoned again and Ford is worried about being let down again. Things go quite well for them for about a month or so - and Ford buys a cat for Bill which he names Pythagorus - until a familiar face fresh off of divorce proceedings arrives in Gravity Falls.

After Ford broke up with Bill in college, he and Fiddleford had a brief fling before Ford admitted he was just trying to get over Bill. Fiddleford arrives with the hope of getting back together with Ford, but is horrified to find Ford right back in Bill's "evil clutches." Fidds gets more and more unhinged as his memory gun usage ramps up and Ford tries to keep things civil between the two men.

#gravity falls #bill cipher #stanford pines #human bill cipher #zeph's human bill au #billford #gravity falls au #fiddleford mcgucket

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thebunniesgrim · 6 months

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One of my favorite things to do is to put the different Sans AUs (and sometimes Papyrus’) in different... “cliques” so to speak

Think like the Star Sans’, Bad Sans’. The Murder Times Trio (or whatever they’re called now) or the Og Three (Undertale, Underfell, and Underswap) as I like to call them lol

So, for instance, I call this group the Timeline Sans’ So, its Sic Sans, UnderTale, HorrorTale or Dusttale (you can add both or switch them out), Aftertale (Geno), and Error if you want to really go the full mile you can add fatal error as well. Basically, it’s fandoms timeline of sans’ life he starts out as a scientist and ends up as error

I thought it was really cool

Another one is the Swaps or the MAGFINACENT CLUB OF COOL DUDES (add any and all papyrus’ or heck even the swap papyrus like a Papy daycare while the swaps talk lol) So basically, Og Swap, Swapfell(the purple swap), Fellswap(the red one), Blueberror, and Gold Swapfell(the other red one) you can add other swaps I personally like to add like lust swap, or Dance swap. I feel like the swaps are either really underrated or don’t get the same amount of crossover with each other like the regular sans’

One I've been work shopping is the Star Gazers (Gayzers?) So outertale (duh), Og Undertale, Error, and Geno. It's cute to see the Og Sans’ and his other versions enjoy his hobbies

I call this one “Not Quite Sans” So, it’s Dream, Nightmare, Ink (if you think he’s not a real sans), Fresh and all the swap papyrus’

You can do a reverse of this and make a “Not Quite Papyrus” group. so, all the swap sans’ and turn Dream, Nightmare, fresh and Ink into papyrus’ '

Another one was “Ow The Edge” Underfell, Swapfell, Fellswap, Dusttale, and Reapertale (for the aesthetic I don’t think he’s edgy but what's more edgy than saying “I hang out with death itself?”) I think our little rough and tumble boys deserve a little time to revile in their toughness just a bunch of tough bois

I really like this one lol “Reading Buds” Altertale(he doesn’t get enough love), error, Geno, Cross, and Nightmare (passive or corrupted works)

Another one is “Role Reversal” Swap, Altertale, Alterswap, Sic sans, and Blueberror

And the last two “Fashion Police” Error, Swapfell Gold, and lust. I just think they’d be the best group of sassy little guys

“Can I Please Have Break?” poor babies... Geno, Asylum Sans, Dust, Blueberror, Lust, and passive Nightmare

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thelastaerie · 1 month

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Post-canon multi-chapter FF fics:

The Berlin Chapter - Takes place two years after Free Fall. A special work assignment sends Marc to Berlin, after he finds out Kay has been living there. Kay enjoys his new life in Berlin and is in a budding relationship with a prominent politician, while Marc is determined to convince Kay to give him a second chance, he still has his whole life back in Ludwigsburg.

A Spotless Mind - This takes place about a year after the original film. Separated from Bettina and feeling alienated in his unit, Marc asks for a transfer to Stuttgart, he is still battling the depression caused by Kay's departure and a drinking problem... one day, he finds Kay working in a bar near where he lives... Though this is another "Fix it" fanfic, it has a twist which some may find implausible, but I have this idea that wouldn't go away, so I thought I'll try to reunite Kay and Marc under different circumstances.

Parting Words - This is a post Canon fic set 10 years after the movie. Marc is now a Sergeant in Berlin’s criminal investigation police department (KriPo), balancing a promising career and a busy dating life. Even though the one regret in his life remains, Marc believes he has moved on - or so he thought until he sees Kay again by chance on the train one morning. Just like before, seeing Kay unravels Marc’s life. It doesn’t help that Kay seems to be doing a disappearing act. Their paths cross when a work-related opportunity presents itself, they soon find out how much has changed and how much has remained the same between them.

Winter Bird - A post-canon short story set between 2-3 years after the original movie ending. Marc tries to move on; he thinks Kay has moved on, so it shouldn’t matter when Frank tells him where Kay is, should it? But soon regrets and memories keep calling, Marc decides to go looking - a trip which could turn out to be a fateful one - for the road to redemption is paved with perils.

The Confessional - This is a post-canon short story.

Leaving Ludwigsburg, his police career and Marc Borgmann behind, Kay Engel decides to have a new career and a new life. His phone number isn’t new but at least he has the sense to block Marc’s number. Out of sight, out of mind, right? Except Marc doesn’t seem to care that Kay isn’t listening. He has made a habit of leaving one-sided messages, treating Kay’s phone like a confessional…

Alternate Universe (AU) multi-chapter FF fics:

Doppelpass - AU story based on Free Fall characters, set in the world of professional football/soccer league in Germany (Bundesliga). Star attacking midfielder Marc Borgmann has two goals this year: winning the league title and Player of the Year award, until Kay Engel enters his life and makes him questioning everything in his life. A rising star in League 2, Kay Engel has a secret he has to keep and falling in love with his new team captain is not his idea of a career move.

Doppelpass: How to Solve a Problem Like Mario - Marc and Kay are living their new life in Hamburg. Marc is the manager of St. Pauli football team who has just been promoted to Bundesliga top league. He begins to notice that one of his players, Mario Lüthi, seems to be harbouring a secret; and has taken an interest in meeting Kay. Set in the “Doppelpass” serie universe, this is a slight crossover with the characters from the movie “Mario” (2018), although you do not need to watch “Mario” to follow this story.

Doppelpass: Christmas coda - Doppelgänger - This little Christmas chapter takes place after Doppelpass’s last Chapter but before the Epilogue. This is soon after they have moved to Hamburg, when Marc is getting his football management pro licence and Kay is attending university. In Kay’s POV - Marc and Kay discuss how to spend their Christmas.

Running on Empty - This is a AU story based on Freier Fall/Free Fall characters. Plus a few original characters. For Marc Borgmann, life is good. He’s about to get married, the security company he co-owns finally hits the big league, landing a lucrative contract to protect prominent businessman, Wenzel Wolff. What he isn't expecting is Wenzel's aloof and ambitious executive assistant, Kay Klossner, who seems to be hiding a secret or two, of who he really is - someone from Marc’s past. Kay Engel thinks he has the best-laid plans. He is so close to the truth now, all he needs is a bit more time. What he isn't expecting is his first crush, Marc Borgmann, reappearing in his life again, stirring up feelings Kay thought he has long given up. Marc sees himself as a protector, but he has no idea who he might end up protecting.

Wanderlust - “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas” - Marc meets Kay, a charming stranger, during a holiday in a Far East city. And allows himself to break a few rules along the way. It’s okay, Marc thinks. Because they will never see each other again. Right? Until one day Kay turns up in Marc’s place of business... This is an AU story with Free Fall characters. A semi holiday romance with a closeted bisexual man who is good with his hands, a photographer who is often prettier than the subjects he photographs. And a chocolate Labrador with separation anxiety.

Take Me Home - An AU story based on Free Fall characters.

Sole heir of a large family business empire, Marc Borgmann is used to his jet-set high life. He has deals to make, plans to execute and goals to achieve. He also has a secret. But don’t worry, he already has a solution for it. It’s all under control - he has an agreement with his ambitious girlfriend. Marc likes rules and he follows them. Until he meets Kay Engel on a flight from Berlin to New York, who breaks rules for fun, leaves napkins with cute cartoons everywhere he goes and Marc can’t seem to get rid of him. Or does he really want to? This is more than opposite attracts, this is Kay turning Marc’s world upside down.

The Wayward Son - An AU story based on Freier Fall characters.

Marc has just joined the famous Berlin LKA, his police career is looking up. All he needs now is to meet the right woman, get married, have 2.3 children and a house of their own. The night he meets Bettina, he thinks he has hit the jackpot, she’s perfect. But Bettina isn’t the only one Marc meets that night. There is also this mysterious stranger named Kay Engel who says weird things to Marc and two hours later, he’s working with Marc and his colleagues on a big kidnapping case. Marc befriends Kay over the course of the investigation, soon he finds out the life he planned for himself might not be what his heart really wants…

Canon-Divergence multi-chapter FF fics:

Say Something - This is a canon-divergence fic that starts from and diverts from the original film after the scene when Marc hits Kay. With additional characters. It is still a “fix-it” story. I’m just trying to explore some “what if” scenarios where the trajectory of the story changes, Kay and Marc make different decisions etc.

Day Zero - This is a canon-divergence story with the assumption that Bettina hasn’t found out about the fake night shifts - so Marc’s affair with Kay remains a secret, even though he has broken up with Kay. The story starts from Marc returning home after giving the key back to Kay.

Nightswimmers - This is a canon-divergence story. It follows the original film version right up to the forest scene where Marc flees after his first sexual encounter with Kay.

What if Kay never got transferred to Marc’s unit? In this story, they meet five years later in another city. Marc is still with Bettina and their son is five years old. Kay has left the police force and now working as a paramedic. Marc never forgets Kay and what happened between them has stirred up something in him, although he is still repressing his feelings, he finds ways to cope with it. But seeing Kay again changes everything again.

Once upon a time, chasing after Marc was Kay’s number one goal. But a shattering experience one night has changed his life forever. He thought the chance is lost before it can begin. But seeing Marc again… could this be his second chance?

Canon-Divergence one-shot FF fics:

Someplace New - A one-shot canon divergence. Part of the writing challenge on scenario: Marc returns to Kay’s apartment and Kay is still there. This is written in both Frank and Marc’s POV

The Key on the Ledge - This is a one-shot Canon-Divergence. Marc goes back to Kay's apartment as Kay is just leaving.

Extended scene/missing scene one-shot FF fics:

Ambush - Extended scene and my take on the “Don’t you get it? I love you” scene from the original film.

The Day He Gave Me His Key - Just my musings on the scene when Kay gave the key to Marc. Marc’s POV

A One-off / Ein Ausrutscher - Mostly canon but with added missing scenes. It is the period soon after Marc’s son was born but before Kay got caught during a police raid.

The Offer - My take on the scenes when Kay offers to go *jogging* with Marc and their encounter in the woods, with additional made up scenes.

*Updated summary of my marc x kay fanfics ❤️

#freier fall #free fall #marc x kay #free free fanfics #999 ways to reunite them #hope dies last

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seconds-2-midnight · 6 months

Text

Posting the first chapter from my rejected PPG/GGG Mafia AU fanfic that I'm thinking of reviving eventually because I actually really liked it! The outline just needs work tbh

Most of it is under read-more just because it's long as shit. Content warning for language, drug use, and brief police violence.

Meet Me At the Green Eye

Ch 1:

June was unusually hot that summer. Those hazy afternoons were well spent by the beach, sitting near clunky old air conditioners, drinking cold beer. It was the kind of summer that was good for business if your business was built on laziness and leisure.

The boardwalk was a good place to score sales, Ace found. The grungy-looking college students on skateboards were always the best customers. He was counting a stack of cash, sitting on a bench near the end of the dock that overlooked a glittering stretch of ocean. One of his pointed leather boots was tapping on the pavement while he whistled cheerfully, one lanky leg crossed over the other. Not far away, Snake stood with his elbows on the rusted rails and a cigarette in the corner of his mouth, listening to the seagulls. Now and then, he’d kick his sneaker against a bit of gravel and watch the stones form ripples in the water below.

“Arturo was right,” Ace said with a high-pitched chuckle. He grinned widely, one of his gold teeth catching the sunlight. “This was a good spot. Hey, speakin’ of, how much product we got left in there, compadre?” He waltzed over with his hands in his pockets, nodding his head toward a messenger bag that was draped over Snake’s shoulder.

“Lemme check,” Snake said hoarsely, gritting his teeth around the end of his cigarette to keep it in place as he rummaged around. He squinted, clicking his tongue in thought. “Ehh…eight ouncesss, give or take…three bags of molly…and five bags of the little blue ones.”

“Shit, day’s not over yet,” Ace said, giving his friend a nudge to the shoulder. He elbowed him a little too hard, causing Snake to flinch and whine quietly. He hated it when he did that. “Can’t wait to count it out later. We got a big score today, I can feel it already. It’s like a change in the wind. We’ll finally get enough for that down payment, huh?”

Not this again. Snake rolled his eyes, thin shoulders slumped dramatically. Ace was always going on and on about this shitty old building that used to be a nightclub, convinced the old owners would sell it to him for cheap and he’d turn it into a bar. ‘We’ll call it The Green Eye’, Ace would say, ‘We’ll get hot dancers, we’ll sell our product out the back for extra cash, it’ll be huge.’ Snake thought it was a fool’s errand, a waste of money. Still, he couldn’t bring himself to argue with Ace. Still his yes-man, through and through, after all these years.

A decade had passed since the Powerpuff Girls left Townsville. Maybe it was because they were growing up, maybe it was because they wanted to try a normal life…who knows? What mattered was that Townsville was more out of control than ever before. And in that time, the Gangreen Gang had changed. Once a group of rowdy teenage boys, they were now fully-grown assholes, but just as despicable as ever. They had bigger goals now, bigger plans - Ace wanted to carve out his own little slice of heaven in this dirty, neon hellscape. And for the first time, it actually seemed possible…but a run-down building in the worst part of town was a dangerous place to start.

“Y’know, jefe…” Snake began nervously, wincing already. He knew this conversation would end badly for him. “I-I don’t wanna doubt your decisionsss but…Maybe it’s better if we start sssmall? Like, getting a bigger apartment for starters. Or renting a houssse instead, one with more bedrooms and–”

Ace scoffed. “And sink our money into a place that Billy’s gonna wreck in, like, a week? Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, this is foolproof. Once the money’s rollin’ in, we’re moving up to a penthouse suite. Rags to riches, my friend. Oh! That reminds me… Hey, listen, bud. Buddy. Pal. My oldest friend. Amigo, old bean, apple of my eye…” Ace was wearing a big toothy grin, putting an arm around his second-in-command with a sly tone of voice and the smell of cheap cologne and hair gel radiating off of him. Snake grinned for a brief second in time, soaking up that tiny bit of approval.

“Since we’re on the subject, I’ve got somewhere to be, actually - gonna talk to a guy about fixin’ the plumbing at that old place. Busted pipe in the basement, sewage everywhere! Anywho’s, take over for me, will ya? Thatta' boy...” Ace gave Snake another sharp slap to the arm, making the other man flinch. It was second nature at this point. With a grimace disguised as an awkward, snaggle-toothed smile, Snake rubbed the sore spot and sighed.

“Yeah, sure.” Of course he just wants me to do more work. “Oh, I’m stoppin’ by Hazel’s shop on the way back, by the way. Tell the guys not to wait up for me.”

Ace scoffed, sticking his hands in the pockets of his leather pants. He rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses, voicing a heavy and exasperated groan. “Man, that dame has still got you on a tight leash, huh? Y’know she only lets you get it in ‘cause you’re her dealer.”

Snake gave him a grumpy, defensive frown, his ears growing warm. “We don’t…I mean…I’m still working on that part–”

Ace let out a loud and sudden laugh. “You ain’t even gettin’ any? Oh, man…tough luck.” He pushed up his sunglasses, still wearing a shit-eating grin as he turned around, waving the keys to his motorcycle over his head. “Anyway, see you later tonight, Captain Friendzone. And tell your creepy friend I said ‘hi’.”

With that, he was gone, the green-skinned hooligan disappearing into a crowd of people and leaving Snake at the end of the docks alone, where he watched the sunset glimmer against the calm ocean waves. It was six-thirty. He was just about to get another rush of sales that would put a nice wad of cash in his pockets.

He didn’t know it yet, but Snake was going to have a very good day that would end in a very bad night. In a matter of hours, he would make his rent for the month, kiss a witch, and end up in jail before midnight.

He was a surprisingly good salesman, all things considered. By the time the sun went down and the crowds dispersed, Snake had sold everything in the bag except for one remaining quarter of Hazel’s favorite strain. He took the cash and his nearly empty bag and began the long walk through dark urban streets. Townsville wasn’t any quieter at night than it was in the day. He could hear sirens blaring somewhere in the distance, joyful shouts and hollering from a beach bonfire, and loud pulsing music from the clubs down the way.

Snake liked walking late at night, for the most part. It was a lonely and peaceful trip when you knew the right path to take. He passed flickering neon signs and drunk idiots staggering out of bars, all while making his way through alley shortcuts to get to the big brick building just next to the tracks where the occasional passing train would rattle the windows.

Yasmin’s shop was closed to walk-ins but open for appointments. This was good enough for him. Snake knocked, hearing the muffled sounds of ethereal ambient music from the other side before voices and footsteps drowned it out. The door cracked open and immediately, Snake caught the scent of burning incense and dried lavender. When the owner of the place opened the door, her good mood immediately deflated.

“Oh, it’s you,” Yasmin Abajian herself was the one who answered the door. She was a tall young woman with dark olive skin and hair that went down to her ass, and she probably would have been a lot friendlier if she didn’t eye Snake with suspicion every time she saw him. She knew his reputation, his gang involvement, his business. And if that wasn't enough, she just didn't like the guy. His weird little friendship with her on-and-off-again girlfriend was reason enough for her to want to slam the door in his face.

“If you’re looking for Haze, she’s busy doing a reading,” Yasmin said, holding the door open just a crack and preparing to shut it. She would have, if Snake didn't stick his hand in the gap.

“I can wait.” He leaned against the wall as if claiming his spot. Yasmin sneered at him in response, recognizing that stubborn, snarky grin on his face - she wasn’t getting rid of him. She could never get rid of him.

“Fine, whatever, get in.” She pushed the door open and stepped aside. “But remember, we’ve got security cameras now. So don't get any ideas.”

Snake snorted with laughter. “I’m not gonna steal any of your rocks. You can save your hexes for the next guy.”

Yasmin wore a fake smile, turning back toward the counter. “Yeah, you’re real funny, asshole. Close the door behind you.”

Yasmin’s shop was an overload to the senses. The main room was cluttered with tables of crystals, ornate hookahs, statues of naked goddesses, and candles. There were bookshelves with texts that Snake wouldn’t even know what to do with and packs of cards that he felt wouldn’t serve him very well in a game of poker. Near the back of the room, he saw a doorway shrouded by a silk sheet decorated with the phases of the moon. That was Hazel’s reading room. He spent plenty of time in there, but right now, she was busy saying goodbye to another customer.

When Hazel came out of the room, she was followed by a middle-aged woman dressed in a gaudy amount of jewelry. Beside Hazel, it was like a peacock standing next to a blackbird. Haze was a stout little shit: full-figured, plump, and about five feet tall if she wore her platform shoes. Her wavy black hair was cut in a French bob, framing her round, rosy-cheeked face like a goth Cabbage Patch Kid.

“Get home safe, my love,” Hazel said, giving the other woman a kiss on one cheek and then the other, holding both of her hands. “Remember, change is good. Don’t worry so much, and good luck with the job interview! Keep that coin in your pocket, it’ll help. Then come back and tell me how it went, okay?”

“Maybe next week,” the lady chuckled. “Thanks again, sweetpea.” The woman in her gaudy jewelry finally left after one more kiss on the cheek, and Snake found himself wondering why Hazel seemed to kiss all of her regular customers… except for him.

When the customer passed by, Yasmin marched over with a scowl and spoke quietly in Hazel’s ear, handing her a white cane. Snake could still hear her.

“That green freak is here again,” Yasmin whispered, earning a pout from her friend. “Honey, you gotta stop encouraging this guy, he’s gonna get you in tr–”

“Shh, it’s fine! Hold my cane, okay?” Instead of looking offended, Hazel just wore this big, stupid gap-toothed grin. Slipping past Yasmin, Hazel pushed her cane back into her friend’s hands and reached out into the open room, wiggling her fingers in beckoning. Snake instinctively grabbed them, leading her to where he stood.

“Mi querida,” she said in her breathy, husky voice, pulling him in for a hug and standing on her toes. She smelled like patchouli and it made Snake’s nose tickle. “I thought you forgot about me. How’ve you been?”

“Not too terrible,” Snake said. He wore a shit-eating grin as he hugged her tightly, making eye contact with Yasmin over Hazel’s shoulder. He noticed her annoyed, red-faced expression and squeezed her waist even tighter out of spite. “I was, uh, workin’ the boardwalk again today…Thought I’d stop by quick before you left for the night.”

“You caught me right on time.” Hazel backed up, reaching for the cloth that separated the main room from her reading room. “Come in, that was my last appointment for the night. I’m all yours.”

She pulled him along by the hand and he didn’t hesitate. Bag secured around his shoulder, he rudely flicked his tongue at Yasmin and then hurried through the silk partition and into a small, dark room with a round table in the center. It was lit by purple neon light, casting an eerie supernatural shine from below. The air smelled like incense and something by Sisters of Mercy was playing quietly from a speaker in the corner.

Seeing the couch against the wall brought back memories of lounging half-awake in a dumb stupor, losing track of time. He could still smell the hookah smoke in his memory and taste it on his tongue. He thought about how Hazel always talked slower when she was high and how much he liked to watch her lips move when she talked.

Her voice snapped him out of his daydream.

“So what’s up?” Hazel asked, sitting down on one side of the table. She started to shuffle a deck of tarot cards, sorting them for storage. “Just in the neighborhood, or were you looking for another reading?”

“Little bit of both,” Snake said with a grin, putting his bag on the table. “I brought you sssomething’. Thought you might be interested in talking about a discount?”

“Oh, we’re talkin’ business. I see,” Hazel teased, her voice low and rattly. She pouted dramatically. “And here I thought you just missed me. So what’cha got for me, sweet stuff?”

Sweet stuff. She was always coming up with these friendly, cute little names to call him. He was a green-skinned gang member with a forked tongue, tattoos, and a criminal record a mile long but she called him sweet stuff. Then again, she couldn’t see him. Maybe that was for the best - he wasn’t so sure she’d still be flirting with him if she saw what he looked like.

Snake put a plastic baggie on the table, opening it slightly for Hazel to smell if she wanted to. “A quarter. Good shit, too. I’d put it at 150 usually for this stuff, but for you, I’ll do…100 and a quick reading. I even saved your favorite strain for you.”

“Oh, you do love me,” Hazel smirked out of the corner of her mouth, puffy lips making a dimple in one cheek. “That sounds fair. You know what I like, papi~ Oh, here–”

She reached into one of her pockets, pulling out a wad of cash from her last few clients. “I trust you,” she said as she slapped it down on the table in front of Snake, who began to flick through the bills with black-painted fingernails. He separated one hundred dollars from the stack and passed the rest over, continuously amazed that this woman trusted him with free reign to her wallet on so many occasions.

“Ssso,” Snake lowered his lisping voice, chuckling quietly under his breath while Hazel shuffled her cards, “Yasmin’s in a rotted mood today, isn’t she? More than usual…You dump her ass again?”

Hazel wore a tiny smirk. “Not me this time. We're back to friendship without benefits and Yasmin wants to find a real girlfriend,” she shook her head with a sigh. No strings attached, that’s what she always said it was. Snake wouldn’t admit it, but he felt a little swell of joy at the news. “Girl from downtown. Works at the club. They danced together a couple of times and Yasmin was surprised she didn’t want anything long-term.”

“Ouch,” Snake grimaced. He didn’t like Yasmin, but he could sympathize with the feeling.

“Aside from that?” Hazel shrugged. “Doesn't help your case that she saw your friend on the news earlier.”

"Almost forgot about that," Snake gritted his teeth in discomfort. “Yeah, Ace has gotten a bit…bold lately. He has been since the girls disappeared.”

“I’ll say,” Hazel sighed. “Robbing a gas station is one thing. That’s small time, no one gives a shit…but three stores in one night?”

It was a miracle Ace hadn’t gotten in trouble yet, honestly. He wasn’t stupid about it. He wore a mask and he covered his face, but people who knew him still recognized who it was. Yasmin was one of those people, and unfortunately for Hazel, she hadn’t stopped bitching about it since the robbery ended up on the news. The only reason she hadn’t spoken to the police yet was because Hazel promised that Snake could move in with them if the guys lost their breadwinner.

So, Ace stayed at large, as many criminals did. Townsville had been dependent on heroes for so long that law enforcement had all but forgotten how to do their jobs.

The cards were laid out on the table, face-down. Hazel pulled her hands away, then tapped a long black nail against an empty spot.

“Pick three and put them here. No peeking,” she said. Snake knew the rules at this point. He did as she said, sliding the cards into place one at a time.

She turned the first card over, running her fingers along the bottom. The text was written in braille - Snake wasn’t surprised that kind of thing existed, but it was always impressive to watch the way she could figure it out just with a slide of her fingertip.

“The Hermit,” she said softly. It was a card Snake had gotten before. “You’ve got some soul-searching to do, chulo. You either need time alone or you’re going to get time alone, and you should be using that time to figure out what it is that you want. Not what your friends want, not what you think you need - I’m talking about real introspection. So look inwards, don’t let someone else influence you.”

“Isn’t that what you’re doing? Influencing me?” Snake asked with a shitty smirk. Hazel couldn’t see the look on his face, but she could hear it in the sly tone of voice as his black-painted lips curled into a smile. She crinkled her nose at him.

“Okay, smartass. You know what I mean.” With a fond smile, she turned the second card. This one was flipped. “Nine of Wands, reversed.” She clicked her tongue ring against her teeth a few times. “You’re stuck. You’ve got big setbacks coming your way and you’re going to struggle to find resilience, but you must, or you’re not going to make it to your goals. If I know you - and I do, Sanford - you’re feeling a lack of support from those around you…Maybe your friends aren’t listening to you? Maybe you feel like you’re being ignored, undervalued, underutilized?”

She stared across the table at him, but not in the way someone with sight might stare. Her cloudy, pale eyes were searching his soul, and the way they somehow centered on Snake’s face was eerie. Those dark Argentinian lashes blinked slowly and her empty gaze remained direct. Snake found himself trapped in that ghostly stare for a moment, his heart beating a little faster before he nodded his head.

“Not too far off,” he chuckled anxiously. “Heh, y-you know, the guyss don’t like to listen to reason most of the time. I put in a lot of work for Ace, especially now that he’s so ssstuck on his new nightclub idea…It feels like he’s not giving me a fair cut for all the effort I put in, y’know? I-I have a good idea or I try to bring a little wisdom to the conversation and they just sshut me up or Ace ssmacks me in the nose or–or–”

“Can I speak frankly?” Hazel asked, sitting back with one knee up and her fingernails clicking together.

Snake just snorted. “You’re going to anyway, aren’t you?”

“Sure am, baby~” Hazel hummed sweetly, before leaning forward and sliding a hand across the table. It took her a moment to find Snake’s, but when she did, she turned his palm over and began tracing lines with one of her fingernails. The sharp tickle made his spine shiver. “You’re a pushover, darlin’. You always have been.” Snake started to laugh, but Hazel continued regardless. “Don’t dismiss it, you know I’m right. I’ve known you for years and you never stand up for yourself. And I’m not talking about witty little quips or venting to me, I’m talking about actually having a backbone. You’re a noodle.”

“I’m a noodle?” Snake giggled hoarsely. “Is that what I am?”

“Yessir, just a big dumb noodle.” Hazel laughed, sticking her tongue out between her teeth. Her tongue piercing briefly clicked against them. “Don’t get me wrong, everyone loves noodles, but when you have a noodle for a spine, it’s hard to stand up straight. Start setting boundaries. Start saying ‘no’. Trust me, you’ll notice a difference.”

Hazel didn’t know the full story. Snake didn’t tell her the full story. Saying ‘no’ wasn’t very simple, not when Ace was in one of his bad moods. He wouldn’t say it was bad advice, only that it was…well, a work in progress that wasn’t going to happen overnight.

She turned the last card over. This one was upright, with an eerie image of a horned demon on the front, leathery bat wings behind it.

“The Devil,” Hazel said, frowning slightly. “This could go several different ways. On one hand, you might be dealing with an addiction you need to let go of. A habit. And I don’t just mean drugs, cigarettes, weed, porn, whatever - those aren’t even the most damaging attachments a person can have. You’ve got a dark shadow of yourself that’s restricting you, an internal villain who wants to hold you back and control you. A parasite. You might be holding on tightly to something that’s trying to suck the life out of you.”

“Eesh,” Snake hissed, sticking his forked tongue between his teeth. “Doesn’t ssound promising for me, does it?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Hazel shrugged. “This could be a good thing. Once you know your villains, you can figure out how to defeat them. Besides, this is also the card of sexuality and desire too. It might be hinting at a passionate attachment waiting to happen, you just have to make sure it doesn’t consume you. Desire can quickly turn into an addiction, a jealous obsession.”

Snake felt his breath hitch slightly when he noticed that look on her face: teasing, flirtatious, playful but still darkly serious. With Hazel, he could never tell her motives. The way she smiled at him, the way she hugged him, her puckish energy … She was like a fae creature with perplexing methods, wise and chaotic all at once. Snake couldn’t parse it. Is she making fun of me? Does she want to sleep with me? Is she just like this with everyone? He tried not to think about it too much and quickly tore his eyes away when he realized his gaze had been wandering. He felt infinitely worse when he realized her blind eyes would never catch him doing it.

“Heh, s-so either way, I’m getting fucked?” he joked, trying to break the tension.

Hazel laughed hoarsely, scooping up the cards and putting them away in a box. “I guess you could say that. Just remember, this is always up to interpretation. That’s kind of the thing with glorified spooky therapy, you're the one who has to do the work. Just don’t forget what I told you about your noodle spine, okay?”

“I’ll try not to,” Snake sighed as he stood up, putting his bag over his shoulder again. “I should get back. If I don’t bring the cash to Ace, he’ll get…well, you know how he iss.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Hazel stood, putting her cards back on the shelf where they belonged. “Get home safe, okay? Be careful on the subway, the weirdos are out. And don’t be a stranger.” She reached out for another hug, holding tighter this time. There was something there, some foreboding anxiety that she felt in the pit of her stomach. The cards, the nervousness in Snake’s voice, hearing about Ace’s crime spree on the news…She felt like something bad was about to happen, but she didn’t know what.

Her own cards had been warning her all day: heartbreak, loss, helplessness. Bad news was on the way and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She felt compelled to hold the hug as long as she could, almost as if letting go meant losing her friend forever.

“I’ll be back next week,” Snake said. It was rare for him to ever speak in such absolutes. “I’ll have another quarter for you by then. Maybe we can…I dunno, hang out and ssmoke a bit? Y-you know, chill at your place?”

“I’d like that, papito…” Hazel finally slid her arms away from the hug, leaving her hands propped on Snake’s shoulders. Then, without warning or hesitation, she leaned in and kissed him softly on the corner of his mouth. Her lips were warm and pillowy. The way her piercing brushed against Snake’s bottom lip made his heart skip a beat. Maybe she had just been aiming for his cheek; he didn’t know. All he knew was that he was too dumbstruck to do or say anything and Hazel didn’t even acknowledge it.

“See you next week…sweet stuff,” she smiled. Snake was still off in another dimension of thought, too distracted to notice the sorrow and worry in her eyes.

He was still thinking about her lips when he left the store. He was thinking about them while he was on the subway, trying to avoid a drunk and belligerent man who was shouting at him while waving a bible over his head. And when he got back to the shitty little apartment he shared with his four friends, he was absolutely cursing himself for not being brave enough to kiss her back.

“There you are,” Ace said as soon as Snake entered. It was almost midnight, and everyone was still awake and huddled around the television with a cloud of smoke filling the dirty living room. Pizza boxes were already attracting flies, a dusty old fan was chugging along in the corner, and the whole place reeked of weed and alcohol. Ace looked as comfortable as ever, wearing his sunglasses inside like a tool. “Thought you got lost, shithead. How’s your big titty goth girlfriend? Get any yet?”

“Shut up,” Snake groaned, tossing his bag onto Ace’s lap with annoyance. “No, we’re not like that…I got a kiss though, that’s gotta mean somethin’.”

Lil' Arturo chuckled. “Whatever, man, she kisses everyone.”

“Yeah, well, she calls me papi.”

Arturo choked on his beer. “Okay, that’s fuckin' weird but I’ll let you have that one.” He let out a sharp giggle and Snake couldn’t help but smirk like a smug little jackass.

Ace sat up straight, rummaging through the bag on his lap and pulling out wads of cash. He was counting them, laying them out on the sofa cushions while Snake sat down in a lumpy armchair and pulled out a lighter. His twisted spine curved until he was melting into the seat. He was just getting comfortable when Ace let out a laugh of triumph.

“Shit, man. We did good today,” he nodded proudly. “Perfect timing too. I talked to Pete - the landlord, y’know? He says he’ll let us rent to own that place on Monroe for four thousand a month if we give ‘im the security deposit in cash. Huh? Not bad.”

“Not bad at all!” Arturo cheered first, while a wave of agreement passed through the group. Snake seemed to be the only one who didn’t immediately seem convinced.

“Wha–no! No, four thousand a month?!” he let out an incredulous laugh. “Just for the sspace alone? We can’t afford that! Not with everything elssse! You still have to worry about the electric bill, repairs, not to mention hiring sstaff–”

Ace interrupted him with an exasperated groan, leaning his head back against the couch. “Oh my gooood, Snake, shuddup!” ” he yelled, picking up an empty beer can and tossing it at his friend’s head. It hit him right in the temple with a loud clang. The rest of the guys started laughing uproariously while Ace continued. “Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard it before, we know! Listen, ya gotta lose money to make money. And where are we gonna get another deal like this? Huh?”

“Uh, I know!” Billy spoke up suddenly and raised his hand, just as his video game went to a loading screen. “Uhhh…um...wait...nowheres?”

“That’s right, Billy, nowheres,” Ace said, pointing at his giant friend with a smile. “We can’t get a deal like this nowheres, so I ain’t passin’ it up. Besides, I make the rules around here and I say, we’re buyin’ that joint and we’re turnin’ it into the best goddamn club Townsville’s ever seen. And we’re doin’ it with or without ya.”

While the other three were cheering Ace on, going along with any half-baked idea he could think up, Snake was pinching the bridge of his large, repeatedly-broken nose and trying to fight back a migraine that was threatening to strike. As his eyes were closed, however, a second beer can went flying at his head and the room erupted into cackling laughter. This one hit him directly in the ear. Some things never changed.

“Hey, seein’ as you’re bein’ a stick in the mud, you can go get us more beer,” Ace said, tossing a wad of cash into Snake’s lap. “Get us somethin’ good too, it’s a celebration.”

“Sseriously?” Snake hissed. “I just sat down–”

“All the more reason,” Ace argued. “Everyone else is comfortable. Go on, get outta here. And buy a better mood while you’re at it, will ya?”

Snake got up from his seat, tossing his hands up in the air in annoyance. As he left, he slammed the apartment door behind him and shoved his fists into his pockets, mumbling to himself angrily as he passed flickering yellow lights and dirty, peeling wallpaper. One of the neighbors was shouting, having an argument with their spouse. Another was playing loud music that made the floor shake. Someone was throwing up in the stairwell. This was their reality - rusty water, mold, and noise.

I should have never gone home, he thought. I should have kissed her. I should have used some of that cash to get a motel room. Maybe she would have gone with me. Maybe we could have spent the night together. Just once. God, I’m so fucking stupid, why didn’t I do it? Why didn’t I just walk back in there and do it?

But it was too late to go back and try again now. He remembered the reading she gave him. It was time for introspection, it was time for him to finally figure out what he wanted. He made a silent promise to himself that the next time he saw her, he'd finally shoot his shot and let her know that what he wanted was sitting on the other side of that table the whole time.

The gas station was quiet. The walk there was calm and slow, lit by the glow of fire trucks a few streets down and serenaded by the blare of distant sirens. When Snake pushed open the front door, the bell jingling overhead, he noticed the way the cashier didn’t speak to him. The young man at the register just stared, his demeanor bristling slightly. Not wanting any trouble, Snake just lazily waved a peace sign in his direction, showing his hands were empty.

People around here knew. There weren’t many folks who didn’t know who he was, who his friends were, what they did. It was the reason why Yasmin hated him spending time at her shop. It was the reason why they could hardly get service anywhere, and why it had taken months to find an apartment landlord who would rent to them.

It was why Snake didn’t think twice about the cashier’s reaction. He was standing back near the drinks, minding his business while the young man on the other side of the store dialed the phone and whispered quietly into the receiver.

Moments later, Snake brought a box of beer up to the front, reaching into one of his pockets to dig around for his identification. He stuck a money clip in his teeth while he fumbled with the card, finally digging it out and slapping it on the table.

“Don’t worry, I’m payin’ honessstly,” he said with a sigh, still watching the cashier tense up with anxiety. Without a word, the boy at the register handed Snake his change as quickly as possible and backed away, not even bothering to give him a receipt.

As he left the gas station, Snake assumed the reaction was just because of how he looked. He didn’t realize that the gas station he had just entered was one of several that Ace had robbed in the last few days.

Sirens were blaring across town. The sound didn’t bother Snake - he was used to it. But when they grew closer, he felt that tension in his chest begin to bloom. He started walking a little faster, eyeing the alleys and side-streets a little smarter. When he dipped into a dark, narrow walkway, he glanced behind him just in time to see a pair of police cruisers drive slowly around the corner.

He didn’t do anything. He didn’t do anything. He kept reminding himself that over and over, but it still didn’t stop him from feeling a wave of nausea bubble up inside of his gut. His heart was pounding, and that feeling only got worse when he reached the end of the alley and saw another pair of cars waiting for him on the other side.

They blocked the exit. They blocked the entrance. Snake looked from one side to the other, looking for another way out, just as one of the officers stepped forward with a hand hovering next to the baton on his hip. The gun wasn’t far away.

“Having a nice walk?” one of the officers asked, his partner standing behind him on alert. “Listen, you’re gonna get down on the ground and you’re gonna put your hands behind your back, got that? We don’t want to let this escalate.”

Shit. This wasn’t right. Snake backed up, dropping the box of beer in his hand and quickly dashing for a fire escape. As he began to run up the metal steps, one of the officers rushed after him in quick pursuit, shouting for him to stop and put his hands on his head. Snake didn’t listen. He knew he should have, but the alternative wasn’t going to do him any good. Long, skinny legs got him up three flights of stairs before he heard a second pair of steps join the first, following after him in a rush.

He heard an electric buzz before he felt anything. Then, all at once, a scorching pain hit the back of his leg and sent him falling forward face-first into the metal steps. His nose and forehead hit the surface with a horrible crack and he could taste blood running down his face from both nostrils.

A pair of rough hands grabbed hold of him and dragged him down the stairs until he was finally brought to his feet. Cuffs were snapped onto his wrists. Blinded by pain and dripping blood, Snake was marched down the fire escape and onto the pavement, staggering and trying unsuccessfully to shake the hands off of him as he was pushed into the back seat of a cop car.

Robbery, they said. The boy at the gas station recognized Snake’s sickly green-colored skin from a glimpse he saw beneath the mask of the criminal who had robbed him at gunpoint earlier that week. Distribution, they claimed…Well, that time, they had proof. Snake didn’t realize that one of the ‘teenagers’ he had sold a bag of xannies to was actually an undercover policeman wearing a body camera.

It was just his luck, really. As he sat bleeding in the back seat of the police cruiser, he thought about the events of the day that led him there. Everything was going so well. He made more money than he had seen in weeks. He got a kiss from someone he liked. He was forming a brand new confidence to say what he felt and make his boundaries known.

It figures that in the end, he still wouldn’t win. The poor fool never did.

#powerpuff girls #ppg #gangreen gang #ppg oc #powerpuff girls oc #fanfic #powerpuff girls fanfic #mafia au #content warning: language and drug use #snake #ace

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blueikeproductions · 6 months

Text

The main OCs of my Heathers AU!

From the bottom left to right onwards:

Kara Sweeney: Ram’s kid sister. A bit bratty but a good kid. Knows her brother is gay and keeps his secret, so long as Ram pays her in Crunch bars. On good terms with Veronica, Martha, Braverman and Sputnik, but likes to tease Kurt.

Charlie Chandler: Red Heather’s baby sister. Shares Red’s smug attitude and superiority complex, though she mostly is just copying her sister as a phase. Likes stealing Red’s scrunchies and is typically wearing them on her wrists, hair and ankles. When at the funeral, Veronica overheard Charlie say to Heather’s corpse it was HER time now, which made Veronica concerned, doubly so when Charlie looked at Veronica and gave her a thumbs up. Adores Veronica and views her as her big sister. Likes to mess with JD and has kicked him in the shin more than once.

Sacha “Specs” Silverman: Part of Veronica’s geeky friend group. His nickname comes from the 3D glasses he’s constantly worn since kindergarten. A huge Star Wars and anime fan, extremely loyal to his friends, and a whiz at computers and electronics. He was the leader of the AV club and delegated Braverman and Jamie tasks suited to their skills. He and MacNamara shared a mutual romantic interest but never dated. Specs became the first tragic murder at Sherwood, being tricked into coming on the roof of the school thinking he was meeting MacNamara, but instead was pushed off the roof by a petty Chandler.

Dan Braverman: The main protagonist among the OC cast. Originally born and raised in Hawkins, Indiana, he came to Sherwood when his stepfather got a better job in Ohio. A cheerful, easy going type who doesn’t let high school cliques and stigmas bother him and happily goes to the beat of his own drum. He (along with Tracey, Cheryl, Specs and JD) is naturally viewed as a threat to the Heathers because he can easily make friends with those from other cliques (Tracey from the stoner faction was the first “non geek” friend he made when he moved into town), and the cliques being divided gives the Heathers their authority. Has an interest in comic art and is usually found reading ALF, Transformers or Disney Ducks comics or drawing comics. Braverman is JD’s best friend, and if we’re being honest, his only friend at the start. The two became close friends during Sophomore year at Hawkins High, and after dealing with a problem involving the Upside Down, Dan unexpectedly moved away leaving JD feeling betrayed. Two years later out of sheer luck, the two boys reunited at Sherwood, Ohio, with new challenges putting their friendship to the test.

Bud Dean Sr.: Jason’s grandfather. His only remaining immediate family after Jocelyn and later Bud died. He came to Sherwood to repossess his late son’s assets taken by police when it was learned Bud Jr’s company was committing fraud. Among the assets Sr. wanted to collect was Jason, and like Bud Jr., only really viewed the boy as property and a tax benefit. Bud Sr. also plans to restart the family company, and groom JD to take over, something JD doesn’t want anything to do with, having finally escaped that nightmare. He comes to the Braverman house unexpectedly one day to pick up his “free loading” grandson, and earns the immediate ire of Cassandra Braverman, Dan’s mother

Elliot “Sputnik” Silverman: Spec’s twin brother. Gained his nickname for his admiration of space exploration. While Specs was older and immature at times, Sputnik was the youngest and the more mature one of the two; however, Sputnik lacked confidence, making him an easy target of bullies. His primary tormentors in high school were Kurt’s group, which all the more stung because Sputnik and Kurt used to be great friends when they were younger. Usually relying on Specs, Veronica, Tracey, Dan or JD to protect him, Sputnik’s world was destroyed when his beloved twin died. Sunk into a near endless depression, and wanting to die, he practically tried to make Kurt punch him so hard he’d succumb to it. Kurt, who had since been changing his ways because of Dan, JD and Specs, instead comically cried uncontrollably which then caused a confused Sputnik to start crying. The two reconcile over grief of their past and losing a loved sibling, and mend their friendship then and there.

Jocelyn Heron-Dean: JD’s late mother. A shy, meek person who is kind and caring to her loved ones but struggles with social situations. She had trouble making friends, but in middle school she met Cassandra, Dan and Liam’s future mother, and the two became fast friends. Jocelyn seemed attracted to those with wild/aggressive personalities, a boon when it came to Casey, but a curse when she became smitten with the rich and good looking Bud Dean, who was in the same class as the girls. Come senior year of high school, Jocelyn was talked into eloping with Bud, leaving town to take over his dad’s construction business. Reluctantly, Jocelyn does so, and never saw Casey again. Nine months later and against Bud’s desire for an abortion, she had Jason. Their relationship soured over time, with the stress of constant moving, Bud’s true, cruel nature becoming more apparent, with Jason being the only bright spot in her life at that point, but even that couldn’t last as her mental health deteriorated. Once again, forced between two rough paths, Jocelyn accepts suicide as her only means of escape, reluctantly leaving Jason with Bud. Prior to this, when Jason was still a baby, she considered divorce and getting in touch with Cassandra somehow so she and Jason could stay with her. She would learn through an old acquaintance that Casey was having her own struggles as a recently single mom with a baby boy of her own, and didn’t want to pile on with her own problems, feeling ashamed she left Casey behind in the first place.

Cassandra “Casey” Braverman: Spunky, loud, and a bit chaotic, but stern and commanding when it matters. A big kid at heart, which makes her one of the very few adults in Sherwood to be sympathetic to Veronica and the others’ problems when they’re brought to her attention. In her teen years, she had a wild streak and was part of rough n’ tumble local biker gang, always looking for a thrill. Her first husband was a man called Clay, who resembled a more fit version of Dan with a handlebar mustache. Dan was not a planned baby (and really neither was Liam later), as Dan was the result of a drunk fling out of wedlock. Casey rolled with it, and figured a kid would be an interesting adventure. She and Jocelyn would become good friends in middle school, Casey made the first move to Jocelyn’s surprise, and were inseparable. She would often drag the shy Jocelyn into crazy adventures, the two having a blast together once Jocelyn loosened up during one. The one thing they disagreed on was Bud Dean: Casey hated him and Jocelyn loved him. They had a fight about it senior year that saw Jocelyn choose Bud, and saw Casey hurt, but for her friend’s sake accept her decision. After Jocelyn ran away, Casey suffered her second major loss in Clay, who died in a horrific motorcycle accident just after Dan was born. After parting ways with her biker friends in Hawkins, Indiana, she worked odd jobs there until she met and fell in love with Roland Braverman, a mostly mild mannered young man who fell for her spunky nature. 16 years later, she gave birth to her second child Liam, and a year after, she met Jocelyn’s son Jason who she happily took in when he needed a place to stay.

Liam Braverman: Dan’s baby half brother. The two share a room and Dan tends to watch over him the most. Martha, Veronica, JD and Kurt have assisted in one form or another in taking care of him, but while Liam loves his big brother the most, he took an interest in JD to the point his first words wound up being “Jay-Jay.”

Cheryl Rodgers: One of the popular kids, though she doesn’t view herself as such, and like Braverman, chats with whoever she pleases with which annoys the Heathers. She’s sweet but tragically dim, not realizing when those like Thrash or Green Heather take advantage of her for their own means. Cheryl hates Heather Chandler, and often Red has to make Green or Gold talk to Cheryl to get her to do something Red wants. She’s part of the cheerleaders and very athletic and very limber which makes her popular with boys. She has something of a male harem kink and has a romantic interest in most of her male classmates, but deep down just wants a sweet, smart guy who respects and cherishes her. Despite this, she has an unhealthy obsession with Thrash and Throttle, the biggest and hunkiest guys on the football team… as well as the most aggressive and cruel. She’s on friendly terms with Veronica and Braverman’s group, and joins them on adventures occasionally.

Roland Braverman: Dan’s stepfather. Mild mannered and kind, but is quick to anger when he gets really stressed out, and has a habit of shouting about what’s bothering him. Is the complete opposite of his wife, and the two will butt heads over matters, but they deeply love each other and find a compromise to a given problem. They’re pry the most stable couple in Sherwood, and are fairly open minded about things the other parents like Ram’s tend not to be. He loves his stepson and son to bits, and works hard to make a good future for them, but his work unfortunately consumes a lot of his time so he’s not around as much since they moved to Sherwood.

Toby Throttle: A cold, quiet, highly perceptive and intelligent type. A member of the football team. Comes from one of the rich families of Sherwood like the Heathers and Ram. While he has everything, he’s cruel and blunt and always seems unhappy, indulging in bullying out of a sick desire to feel something. Throttle appears to hate everyone, even his own parents and little brother, with the only one he seems to care about is his best friend and other half Thrash, and even then that’s peculiar because Throttle particularly hates low income people. He’s the counterpart to the loud, boisterous, simpleminded Kurt, and the one who took him in under his wing come high school.

Terrance Thrash: Arrogant, moody, dim, and violently aggressive. Part of the football team. The stock 70’s-80’s teen movie bully. He’s the middle child of a large low income family and tends to be ignored, freeing him to do as he pleases. Like Throttle, he loves to bully his classmates, and throw his weight around. He truly has peaked in high school, with what could be charitably called his best years behind him already. He’s Heather Chandler’s on again off again boyfriend, and while they mostly use each other for sex, there DOES seem to be genuine love between them ala Pete and Peg from Goof Troop. Between the two boys, Thrash does all of the talking, and is often pointed in the right direction by Red/Green Heather or Throttle to stir up trouble. He’s the counterpart to the marginally more intelligent (by comparison) and thoughtful Ram, taking under his wing come high school. He has a disdain for gays, fat chicks and nerds, though he’s thankfully stupid enough to not realize Kurt and Ram are (secretly) gay.

Kelly Kelly: Kurt Kelly’s older sister. A kind, chatty girl who was very popular and loved, who Kurt admired when he was little. Kelly was the one who helped nurture Kurt’s nerdy and sporty interests, along being the only one at the time who was aware Kurt was more into boys and tried helping him understand those feelings. Tragically, she died in a plane crash along with their mother, with it being suggested Kurt’s fall to bullying and his comical behavior was partly him still grieving over his sister. It took JD beating Kurt up to protect Braverman, Spec’s death and Sputnik’s own despair for Kurt to properly move on and return to his true self.

#blueike productions #blueike #heathers the musical #heathers au #heathers #heathers 1989 #heathers movie #heathers ocs #dan braverman #heathers oc

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