#poc from my classes ! why was there none in the gay student group. also the group was mostly compsci majors

[ierogenvy]

i will forever rmr being w the gsa at my school and feeling like i had to defend my fashion choices just bc i’m a lesbian. i had to explain multiple times during the week of halloween that my ultra sharp and long nails that i put on specifically for halloween didn’t negate my lesbianism. i had to listen to people older than me that were the leadership members of the group proudly comment that they didn’t know nonbinary people could be lesbians. i had to listen to a presentation on various queer identities that included pansexuality as not only valid but as interchangeable with bisexuality - the argument given for p*n basically being ‘hearts not parts.’

like i know no one is perfect and people are in different places in the journey’s learning about queer stuff but like. cmon. that was supposed to be a place to feel safe and accepted, not talked over and questioned.

#dont mind me #personal #rant #i think abt this gsa literally at least once a week #i got a crush on a girl there !!!! then she made a comment being angry at ‘panphobes’ and i just #also the group was verrrry white. like we’re in TN and we were in a pretty small and white town but it’s also a college town. i knew several #poc from my classes ! why was there none in the gay student group. also the group was mostly compsci majors #or stem. rather than humanities. and they were real weird #i can’t wait to go back to campus in the fall to see if anyone still goes to the school but also i don’t want to see anyone bc like #then i’ll have to explain why i stopped going to the group and why i left the discord #like i can’t in person to people i don’t know that we’ll be like ‘ur opinions r wrong and bad and here’s why’ #and god forbid you try to say something in a complete sentence they did not know how not to interrupt #we had a game night once and multiple people brought single player video games #or games that required a nintendo switch. besties .... game night is for group activities w the whole group #not just the people that can afford a video game console or want to play their own game in a room w other people #i hated going w/o my friend 1) bc i’m awkward and needed a buffer but 2) i felt so uncomfy there alone ! i felt like i didn’t have anything #in common w these people #while i’m on the topic once at this school i met someone on the train tracks - they borrowed my friends lighter for their cigarette- and the #they were tall and complimented my pink hair before i got it fixed (they were lying to me !!!) and i think k about them twice a daily #day* babe if ur out there i’m obsessed w u i would love to hold ur hand and at least be friends #i miss being w my friends. like physically #[redacted name for privacy] babe i am coming this summer to a town near you (your town) i miss u so bad #i miss being insnae w other people !!!!!!! sometimes i pull an all nighter or drink too much caffeine to get that feeling again !!!!