#please tag your results

[inkskinned]

you wanted to be a good friend, because you loved your friends, but the truth was that everyone else somehow had a pamphlet on being normal that you never received. most of the time you learn by trial-and-error. you are terrified of the next big mistake you make, because it seems like the rules are completely arbitrary.

you've learned to keep the prickly parts of your personality in a stormcloud under your bed - as if they're a second version of you; one that will make your friends hate you. it feels feral, burning, ugly.

instead, you have assembled habits based on the statistical likelihood of pleasing others. you're a good listener, which is to say - if you do speak up, you might end up saying the wrong thing and scaring off someone, but people tend to like someone-who-listens. or you've got no true desires or goals, because people like it when you're passive, mutable. you're "not easy to fluster" which is to say - your emotions are fundamentally uninteresting to others around you; so you've learned to control them to a degree that you can no longer really feel them happening.

you have long suspected something is wrong with you, but most of the time, googling doesn't help. you are so-used to helping-yourself, alone and with no handbook. the reek of your real self feels more like a horrible joke - you wake up, and, despite all your preparations, suddenly the whole house is full of smoke. the real you is someone waiting to ruin your other-life, the one where you're normal and happy. the real-self is unpredictable, angry.

your real self snarls when people infantilize the whole situation. because if you were really suffering, everyone seems to think you'd be completely unable to cope. but you already learned the rules, so you do know how to cope, and you have fucking been coping. it's not black-and-white. it's not that you are healed during the other times - it's just that you're able to fucking try. and honestly, whenever you show symptoms, it's a really fucking bad sign.

because the symptoms you have are ugly and unmanageable for others. your symptoms aren't waifish white girl things. they're annoying and complicated. they will be the subject of so many pretentious instagram reels. if they cared about you, they'd just show up on time. you care, a lot, so deeply it burns you. you like to picture a world where the comments read if they loved you, they'd never need glasses to see. but since that's a rule you've seen repeated - "one must never be late or you are a bad friend" - you constantly worry about being late and leave agonizingly early. there are no words for how you feel when you're still late; no matter how hard you were trying.

so you have to make up for it. you have to make up for that little horrible real you that you keep locked in a cabinet. you are bad at answering emails so every project you make has to be perfect. you are weird and sensitive so you have to learn to be funny and interesting. you are an inconvenience to others, so you become as smooth as possible, buffing out all the rough parts.

all this. all this. so people can pass their hands over you and just tell you just the once -how good you are. you're a good friend. you're loveable.

#spilled ink #woke up at 530 to write this lmafo #me in a cold sweat: #how do i be normal #edit in the tags: #hey so i've seen y'all talk about like ... wondering if ur ''allowed'' to relate #like if this is about X specific diagnosis #and when i first posted it i really almost labelled it ''please don't assume this is about a specific condition'' #because as an artist i am often walking this line of discussing a symptom or discussing my conditions etc #and sometimes yes ! i do want to talk about an experience that is specific to who i am and my condition #but sometimes the effort of the post is about the EXPERIENCE rather than the diagnosis #because yes i am not neurotypical and as a result that influences my work but it is ALSO true that there are many reasons #why someone might experience this particular vague horrible feeling that you are... almost being CHASED by what you ''really'' are. #that you're outrunning your symptoms... that you're not really normal you're just sort of a mockery of a person #.... that's a really isolating and horrible way to feel no matter why you are feeling it. and the nature of this PARTICULAR post is that #it is inherently talking ABOUT that sense of isolation & of feeling not-deserving & of minimizing your own experiences to make urself #palatable for society in a way that others find easy-to-deal-with.... #this post is about a certain experience such that my impression is there's a higher likelihood that those who relate #would have more difficulty thinking they ''deserve'' to relate - that it doesn't REALLY belong to them #bc often we are the kind of people who are SO used to being alienated and set aside and ''different'' that we AUTOMATICALLY assume #that things are not ''for'' us... they never have been why would it start now #we are the kinds of people to be ... ''too normal for X diagnosis but too symptomatic to be normal'' #[or as this post points out... so good at ''coping''/masking/hiding it that we essentially conform to whatever shape we're poured into] #but i have witnessed others already say in the tags ''thought this was about me but it's about X so it can't be'' #and im like ... of course it was about you. #art is not a resource that is diminished by greater appreciation . #you reflect in whatever mirror fits your frame. not just the ones in your bedroom. not just the ones i specifically give you. #there will be - and often are - times that i will talk about my specific conditions... but if you're reading this #regardless of why you're here... we are here together. holding hands through space and time. and i love you for carrying it #and i know you're exhausted. i am too. but i understand. and i see you.

[gabe-lovebot]

councilor 3D model

i learnt 3d modelling from the ground up to bring him to life. he's yours now. do whatever you want with him

[link]

please credit me if you make something using the model (or even ping/link me to it, i would love to see what you made!)

currently available as a .blend, .fbx and an SFM port.

#hello councilnation i'm finally releasing him to the wild #have fun playing toys with him #ultrakill #councilor #councilor ultrakill #3d stuff #obviously with the councilor having just 1 full body image of him means that some stuff i had to improvise on #so you get to enjoy my headcanons on how he looks #(like obviously the wings & halo) #(but also the chestplate design) #but did you know that the councilor's canon design has subtle engravings on his forearm armor pieces? #i only barely noticed them when painting textures and i was floored #i had to add them #to the sfm anon and whoever else wants to use this for sfm stuff- #i did my best with a port for sfm and i'm quite proud of the result #but please be aware i have never used it before so if you find that something doesn't work as it should please please let me know!! #gonna pour my heart out in tags as always so close your eyes if you don't wanna see me being sentimental but #i'm not kidding when i say i learnt 3d modelling from the ground up for this #i have meddled with blender before but never actually came close to finishing a project #and i don't know how i did it and how i kept going #(i do know) (it was my friend encouraging me every time i showed him progress) #this was like 1 entire month in the making #but i'm so fucking proud of this and how it turned out and people's tags in my act 2 render genuinely were such a huge confidence boost #so thank you guys for liking it <3 #i'm still very much thinking of doing a version with just his bloodied head #but it might take a while because i want a break and i want to play warframe

[bleachbleachbleach]

 °𐐪♡𐑂° Gotei 13 Compatibility Test  °𐐪♡𐑂°

Editorial Notes:

※ It has come to the attention of the editorial staff that past data from old versions of the Computer Fun Compatibility Test--concerning participants who have since disappeared mysteriously--were mistakenly included in the current version. The staff apologizes for any mental distress this may cause.

※ Compatibility data is based on ethnographic field interviews very professionally conducted by editorial staff. Data may be reflective of the subjects' self-perceptions, which are not always based in objective reality. The staff apologizes for any confusion this may cause.

※ Questions are taken nearly verbatim from the original Living World Computer Fun Compatibility Test question bank, lightly edited to suit the context of the Soul Society. The staff does not apologize for the plagiarism; there is no copyright law in Soul Society. (But it's also fair use.)

Accessibility Text:

Looking for love? Hoping for a hookup? Whether you are tired of barking at the stars or are just looking to window-shop, look no further than the Computer Fun Compatibility Test!

With 20 probing questions and highly specialized technology, the Test will determine your compatibility with all 27 Captains and Vice Captains (and Super Vice Captains) currently serving in the Gotei 13.

For a limited time only, purchase your results at a steal -- only 13000環!

Proceeds will benefit future special editions of your only monthly Gotei news source, Seireitei Communications.

#14106 is japanese pager-speak for 'i love you' #the post that inspired this one did NUMBERS on Tumblr (5 likes) #naturally we needed to answer popular demand with a hotly anticipated follow-up!!! #please feel free to tag us if you post your results we'd love to see your percentages! #gotei 13 compatibility test #seireitei communications #bleach meme #bleach #no brain just bleach #please take the quiz it took me forever to input all 30 outcomes and I want to make sure someone sees them #+1

[starswallowingsea]

I made another Enstars vs Literature quiz based on the original Russian lit quiz, but this time with Hispanic/LatAm lit

#shay speaks #ensemble stars #enstars #uquiz #PLEASE SHOW UP IN THE TAGS #also please rb with your results i wanna know what u get :3 #the results page is kinda generic its kinda late and i spent the better part of 3 hours finding quotes and translating them #i translated like 5 of these and i think one book just. doesnt have an english translation so i left the title in esp #i added so many books to my tbr from this though it was v fun and worth it

[stimmy--cryptid]

got sent a tiktok where one of our gifs of ourselves was used in the thumbnail + beginning of the video. gentle reminder in case anyone sees this that we're all very uncomfortable with our homemade gifs, esp when it includes us in the video and isnt just of objects, being reuploaded off of tumblr at all :[ ty!!

-🥬

#esp without credit </3 pls dont put your @ over top of one of our homemade gifs #i dont feel too comfy with video/gifs of us being reuploaded off tumblr #we include that disclaimer in all of our homemade gif posts bc of this #ik a lot of people just like. take gifs off pinterest or off stimboards without bothering to check #this is just like a gentle plea to please check the sources on the gifs you use and to properly credit your gifs #theres more to say on this topic than a quick 1am tag rant on a post abt smth else #but theres a really big problem with not checking sources and not crediting within the stim community and especially off of tumblr #like people who just steal off of pinterset and google images and then say 'oh idk i saved this forever ago' or 'its from google' #not to be rude but also fully to be firm its so easy to credit your gifs and sources it takes us maybe 20 minutes at most to link a board #and its so easy when you go in with the intent to link it. just like the posts you download gifs from or open them in another tab #if youre using desktop firefox has such a quick extention to reverse image search and the results will pull up the original post+ #+or the tags on a post that used the same gif to make it so easy to find the original #if youre gonna make stimboards that include someone elses content #be it homemade gifs or gifs you made from someone elses video #or even gifs made of a third party video you downloaded off tumblr or pinterest or google images #you *need* to credit the creator #and respect the boundaries of the creator. #we make sure the stuff we upload on any blog isnt harmful at all. that animals in gifs are respected that creators arent awful that+ #+the video isnt made using generative ai. and like. not saying everyone has to go to those lengths. just that its doable and so easy #theres really no excuse to plagiarize and take a gif someone made of themselves and put your own url on it #even if you made the compilation its so easy to just *also* add the op's url + platform in somewhere else visible on the image #and its also so easy to like. go to the website google images is showing you for the image or reverse search the pinterest post #to make sure the creator is ok with their own video of themselves being posted on tiktok #:/ #not stim #mod talk

[transrevolutions]

had a conversation that made me really curious:

*if it means anything to you I'm talking about the literal situation during June 1832 in Paris, not a hypothetical modern scenario. (This might be relevant if your answer would be impacted by the cultural context surrounding the circumstances of your decision.)

#les mis #les miserables #enjolras #poll #pigeon.txt #if you don't know what this means #please vote show results #or just don't vote #this is NOT mentioned in the musical #so if you're a musical fan exclusively #then you probably won't know what the hell I'm referring to #fun ethical dilemmas with ash! #feel free to put your answer in the tags if you'd like #though I get it if you don't because this might seem. uh. controversial #anyways pls rb for greater sample size #the brick #victor hugo #june rebellion

[kyoupann]

taking my pretentious LU quiz after 2-3 years of its birth. wish me luck*

update: my own uQuiz grabbed me by the throat.

here the link if someone who hasn't taken it yet would like to!

*edit: please try not to share screenshots of your result in the reblogs! 😊

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #*wish me I don't get (redacted) #anywussy might share the link again for all the new peeps #I said I was gonna make a second quiz but uhhh easier said than done #or if you've taken it before take it again an compare your results lmao #also please let me know what you thought of the test c: #im stupid and forgot to add that last edit #please don't show the result #you can share them on your tags tho!! :D #or like you can share the boy you got but not the description? that's supposed to be a surprise heehehe

[carcarrot]

#alright everyone . decided to make another silly poll #this ones only lasting a day bc i realized i cant remember to check in a week for the results but ill try to for the other poll #24 hours. 10 russell eras . you decide #i feel like if we did this with ron it would be a no 1 in heaven sweep #but interested to see how it turns out here. #also sorry late 80s enjoyers. #i could have defined the 2000s more but i only have 10 slots and there's just so much variation in the 70s #if you reblog please explain your reasoning in the tags for science. this is an important study #russ #russell mael #sparks

[satari-raine]

My graduate thesis - after (somehow) successfully defending it last week to my committee team - just got officially accepted by my school. Time to become a blanket burrito and (try to) sleep forever out of relief that it's finally finished.

#Satari rambles #Hi there and howdy #I have occasionally poked in on here to talk about the whole graduate school thing #I'm just so glad it's done now #One of my committee members had to observe my teacher last night for class and he announced I had successfully defended it last week #And I don't know #Just seeing him and the other members and then my classmates proud #Got a little emotional #Even if it still feels surreal to have written as much as I did and even if I have some conflicting feelings about the end result #Since I did a creative fictional thesis #But I really am happy it's done and I'm almost done with school #(Granted I'm scared for what comes after especially with finding work right now among other things but that's for later) #But yeah #This has been the usual Satari is a dork who rambles in the tag night (even though it's only the afternoon right now) #Please tip your service staff #Have a wonderful timezone everyone #Also my committee head bought me some books to celebrate and oh my gosh I love that woman #She's so dang kind and it was really touching #People are so wonderful sometimes #I hope I can give some of that wonder back even if as a fraction

[lunieloon]

WHATS UP PEEPS

Hey so if you could all uhhh take this quiz to see what OC of mine you are I would really appreciate it pls i wanna see if they're relatable. ^-^

#original character #oc #uquiz #uquizzes #personality quiz #indie cartoon #which character are you #oc brainrot #please i need to know #also please tag your results!!!

[auxilion]

Another uquiz :D

#uquiz #personality uquiz #villain #You can share your results in the tags! #I tried to make image descriptions but if messed them up please let me know

[weewoow-2060307]

Very important question. who you think is going to initiate the first Byler kiss?

#stranger things #byler #will byers #mike wheeler #i know what you are #I feel like I need more tags #I want thus to have reaaacchh #I wanna be able to tally the results yknow #I wanna see what people think #me personally #im torn #like- Im leaning towards Mike #but 🤷‍♀��� #esp considering Mike has been gazing at Wills lips but doing nothing abt it #and Mike initiated a kiss with El #Will needs a turn #And if Mike confessed feelings and Will took thay as a go ahead #idk #please rb with your thoughts

[fuckedupcleric]

Quiz and picrew

Thanks for the tag, @raphaelesbian 💕😊

#tag games #i hate the long chain posts so I'm just posting like this jsksnsjasks #anyone who wants to participate please do! #and tag me so I can see your results haha

[volnixian]

What tarot card are you?

the fool

there is an endless road ahead of you. long and winding, it is impossible to imagine every fork, every path you could take. like looking down from a high place, the sheer magnitude is dizzying. but it is freeing. god, it is freeing. you have all the time in the world to explore– endless choices to make; take time to appreciate it all. just be careful not to lose yourself to the recklessness that comes with such wondrous freedom.

NUMBER: 0

UPRIGHT: beginnings, innocence, spontaneity, a free spirit

REVERSED: holding back, recklessness, risk-taking

tagged by: myself (took from casi)

tagging: whomever wants to

somehow i knew before starting this would be my card. it's the only one i know

#tag game #// please make your own post of your results!

[areyoumyfather101]

I am BEGGING please stop trying to make an acronym out of Brennan's full name just write the full thing

#brennan lee mulligan #this isnt twitter why have i seen people shortening his full name into an already very well know acronym for something else #yall have to understand how your posts look when you do that #especially when they start talking about brennan killing pets #dont acronym his name please #plus tumblr takes posts with the acronym and puts it in search results even if you didnt tag it that way

[annaofaza]

Knives knows he's coming, with earth embedded underneath his nails, sweat drying on his brow, cheeks sticky and eyelids rubbed raw. He counts on it.

#vashwood #trigun #trigun maximum spoilers #my fic #this is the result of five(?) cups of wine and laying awake all night at a friend's #wondering 'what if livio didn't come to vash?' #as well as 'how do you come back from orchestrating the death of your brother's love?' #a culmination of knives's 'my vash' in the german dub #BTW please read the warnings! #i had trouble with the tags but please lmk if something else needs to be tagged