#phin.txt

[lycanthropicture]

kripke era is like ok dean has a djinn dream and fake mary says she loves him but its just the monster trying to manipulate him. and his fake wife says she loves him but it's just the monster trying to manipulate him. and then fake lisa says she loves him in a dream but it's just a monster trying to manipulate him. and then fake john says he loves him on the phone but its just a monster trying to manipulate him. ok cool that's every time dean hears "i love you" during kripke era.

#ps the first time a real person tells dean they love him is season 6 and it's bobby. #yes i went thru every single instance of the words 'i love you' in supernatural #yes i made a spreadsheet #and what about it #this is tumblr. we do real honest work here #phin.txt

[lycanthropicture]

things to think about. kelly kline (pregnant with jack) caused a bible to burst into flames just by touching it. however jack held a bible in 13x02 and nothing happened. this leads me to conclude that jack played his first prank pre-birth. and tbh it was funny as hell good job buddy.

#phin.txt #500 #1k

[lycanthropicture]

4x22 is such a masterpiece for moments like this but. when dean and cas are arguing and dean punches cas to establish that cas is so physically strong and such an immovable powerful force that getting punched in the face did not hurt him at all and actually hurt dean a lot more and quite possibly even broke dean's hand. and then like a minute and a half later they do this

oooo how sexy how crunchy how delicious this little shove is.. oh little angel allowing himself to be moved by a human he's saying "please convince me please yell at me please tell me to do this because if you ask me one more time i'll do it i'll do it for you"

#look at them literally look at them #cas cas cas baby i love you i love you #4x22 #phin.txt #500 #1k #2k

[lycanthropicture]

im so distraught like. you spend your whole life performing for everyone, even for yourself, so that no one ever knows the worst things, the most vulnerable soft broken things about you. and this STRANGER sent by GOD sees you at your absolute worst, your absolute most monstrous and tells you you deserve to be saved. and he sees you and he sees you and he sees you. and 12 years later he still sees you, every part of you. and he knows how you see yourself and he SEES you and he loves you. he's an angel and hes seen you at your absolute worst and he looks at you and sees you and he sees the man he loves and and and you love him too im so distraught holy fuck they were in love they were in love

#they were literally in love im fucking sobbing oh my god #phin.txt #500

[lycanthropicture]

like the watsonian explanation for "why does castiel not conform to the narrative the writer (chuck) wants for him" is that castiel is gay and in love with dean. and the doylist explanation for "why does castiel not conform to the narrative the writers (spn writers) want for him" is that castiel is gay and in love with dean. like idk how to explain that supernatural became so fucking meta that not only did the writers insert themselves into the narrative, but the character that they wrote to rebel against their writer stand-in character also began to rebel against the real writers. like idk how to explain this to people that havent seen this show but it is THEE most insane experience of metafiction. its like the writers were Doyle and they made a character meant to rebel against Watson, but then they wrote themselves into the story AS watson. so by rebelling against watson, cas rebelled against doyle as well. idk if that makes sense but they literally started fighting each other bc castiel became Too Gay To Control. like literally when people say "unparalleled media experience" that is what they mean

#cas is THEE character bc hes the only character in the narrative who can be spoken abt as the same by both watson and doyle #chuck hates cas bc he cant control him #the writers hate cas bc they cant control him #chuck tried to kill cas but was forced to bring him back #the writers killed cas but were forced to bring him back #every other character is like #oh dean flirts with men bc from a watsonian perspective he is attracted to men #but from a doylist perspective he flirts w men bc the writers think its funny and emasculating to make their all american alpha male fruity #but cas?? #everything is literally like 'he did this bc hes gay and the writers couldnt control him' and thats the explanation #both within the narrative and outside of it #THEE character of all time #spn meta #anyway thats my morning rant #how are you #phin.txt

[lycanthropicture]

UGH IT HITS SO HARD like dean's crypt scene "we need you" followed by a quieter admittance of a deeper singular personal truth "i need you" and the vulnerability and courage it took for him to say that. like its not something that came naturally for him. and then 12x12 cas is dying and his "i love you" comes out and he stops and he sees deans face and he does what does not come naturally to him either and he covers up that earnest truth with a less personal "i love all of you" and. it's always for the other person's benefit. dancing on this line between needing and loving. between "we" and "i", vulnerability and detachedness. dean makes himself vulnerable bc cas has cracked him open and he lays himself bare for cas's benefit. cas detaches himself bc he sees dean's unwillingness to accept and respond to whats happening in front of him, so he closes himself off and equivocates for dean's benefit and it's like ohhh you idiot! you idiots! just allow yourself to take what you want just ONCE and you could have it! you could have it! and then the one time cas finally does it.... well.

#anyway thank you to the discord for spending forever trying to help me remember the word ''equivocate'' god bless u #phin.txt #500 #12x12 #8x17

[lycanthropicture]

idk if anyone else experienced it like this but it's like. you're trying to come out for the first time and you're sitting in the car or on the couch or at a dinner table or standing against a wall or in a doorway or whatever and the other person doesnt know that youre going thru an internal crisis so theyre just chatting away and going about their business and ur brain is SCREAMING at you to "just say it just say it just say it just say it" and the words are all messed up and your throat is dry and the other person is like "you good?" and you nod and give the weakest little smile and you feel sweaty and nauseous and hot and cold and you're like "just DO it just SAY it" but you can't bc your mouth just wont open

#i think he at least tried to come out to charlie i think he at least tried #i dont think he would be a big labels guy #but #i think he would try to tell her he has feelings for cas #anyway #phin.txt #500 #1k

[lycanthropicture]

remember in point of no return when cas beat the shit out of dean and showed up at bobby's with dean unconscious, beaten to hell, and draped around his shoulders and sam was like "wtf happened to him" and cas was like "me" and bobby and sam just had. absolutely no follow up questions. none whatsoever. like not even a weird look. they were just like "... damn. anyway whats up cas"

#5x18 #500 #1k #2k #phin.txt

[lycanthropicture]

season 8 of supernatural is like dean is man meat for every tom dick and harry. dean is in a love triangle with two men. deans relationship with a man is paralleled with sams relationship with his love interest. dean spends a year searching for "HIS" angel. dean and cas hug. dean is so distraught over the idea that cas would leave him that he rewrites the event in his mind and thinks hes hallucinating cas. cas is legitimately lobotomized in an attempt to rid him of his feelings for dean in a plotline that is very clearly a conversion therapy allegory. dean tells cas "i need you" and was originally scripted to say "i love you." cas breaks out of angelic brainwashing bc dean is on his knees pleading with him. metatron makes cas go thru a series of trials relating to angelic and human love, including getting a cupid bow and killing a nephilim. metatron uses cas's grace as the last ingredient. cas becomes human, officially completing his fall from grace. also you're not allowed to say "bisexual" at cons anymore or fans will boo you and jensen ackles will accuse u of ruining the show for everybody

#cool #tumblr user livepasthope you have made me insane for today thank you #phin.txt #s8 #500

[lycanthropicture]

spn writers definitely wrote the consent requirement for angelic possession in order to stretch the “will they/wont they say yes” plotline throughout season 5 but like. also it makes narrative sense that angels have to have consent bc theyre supposed to respect the fact that humans have free will. but then they treat the consent requirement like red tape. it’s like an inconvenience that keeps them from getting what they want, instead of a vital part of respecting what makes humans human. it’s just like this perverted concept of consent, where the angels try to torture a yes out of their potential vessels. instead of seeing humans as beings with free will and bodily autonomy, they view them as the annoying little things occupying THEIR vessels. it fits bc it’s indicative of how far the angels have drifted from their mission and of their lack of respect for humanity. cas says his actions in 4x20 and everything he did to the Novaks is his biggest regret, but isnt just bc of what it did to Claire. thats part of it, of course, but when cas rebelled and in the seasons that followed, he learned abt humanity, and he realized how crucial to humans free will is. he realizes he took jimmy's choice away, essentially taking his free will and therefore robbing him of his humanity, and that's why what happened with the Novaks is cas's biggest regret.

basically angels have even less respect for bodily autonomy than demons bc at least demons KNOW that they’re taking peoples humanity from them and actively take pleasure in that, but the angels fully just disregard the human altogether and view their body as a possession (pun intended lmao) that the human is keeping from its rightful owner, the angel.

#i just think #idk #thoughts thoughts thoughts #hm #4x20 #spn meta #phin.txt #500 #1k

[lycanthropicture]

deans thought process is like. it is not gay when you are a cowboy or a sailor or a soldier and you are a manly manly cishet manly man and you form deep connections with your brothers-in-arms and also you have a lot of sex with them. bc, yes, homosexuality is a threat and a challenge to masculinity but cowboys and sailors and soldiers are the pinnacle of masculinity so they must also be explicitly heterosexual despite their very obviously gay sex acts. so that must mean that they are SO masculine that they simple NEED sex in the way someone might need to eat or drink or breathe, even if it means fucking someone they're not attracted to and even if it means that person is a man. if you're starving you'll eat food you dont like! if you're horny and sexually starved you'll fuck a homie! doesnt mean you're gay! so actually when cowboys and sailors and soldiers fuck their brothers-in-arms its actually an expression of extreme masculinity and sexual appetite and even of heterosexuality. it's not gay to fuck your homies if theres no women around and its especially not gay to fuck your homies if theres a lot of blood and sweat and you lowkey would die for them.

and thats how he retroactively rationalizes purgatory as an Extremely Heterosexual Experience despite all the gay sex

#and its also why dean likes cowboys so much #something something the longing for the ability to act on homosexual attraction without it meaning hes gay #ie without it threatening his masculinity #and #this is also how spn uses deans gay experiences to BOTH queerbait AND reinforce his heterosexuality to a cishet audience #theyll explicitly state that dean has had threesomes with characters like crowley and lee #and what queer audiences hear is 'dean had sex with crowley and lee. this man is gay.' #and what cishet audiences hear is 'deans relationship with these men is comparable to that of brothers-in-arms.' #'of course they fuck sometimes! nothing gay abt fucking your homies in the trenches!' #phin.txt #spn meta

[lycanthropicture]

if EYE was making the prequel it would be dean narrating to both john and mary in heaven. every episode has A, B, and C plots with three separate time settings: ye olde pre-sam and dean days (ie, young john and mary), post-mary death but pre-pilot (focusing on the boys relationship w john and their fucked up childhoods), and then tying it all together with the absolute disaster of a marriage between john and mary falling apart in heaven as all this info is revealed to them

john learns abt everything mary hid from him re: her family and hunting, even continuing to hunt post marriage like w asa fox (makes john feel inadequate and less like a special little princess due to mary being quite obviously a better hunter who was really more in love with the idea of normalcy john represented than john himself), and mary learns abt how john abused and repeatedly abandoned her children after she died (makes her enraged to the point of murder). every episode ends with john and mary even more pissed at each other than they had been in the beginning.

#and then at the end mary is like ''I PREFER WOMEN ANYWAY'' and then goes out and gay marries Anna in a joint ceremony #with dean and cas who are also getting gay married #thee end #phin.txt #jary prequel #tw abuse mention

[lycanthropicture]

hmmm something about... cas choosing emmanuel as a name. "god is with us" named after the biblical figure immanuel. he doesn't remember who he is but his needs, his wants are still there. "emmanuel" not as a name he picked randomly from a website but as a wish. "god is with us" not a statement but a pleading prayer. cas hoping beyond hope that his sins haven't been too great, that he's not beyond saving, that god is with him. vs then when he's steve. like he goes from "i have chosen this name in a prayer to my father, an apology. a symbol of hope and faith in a time where i have very little else" to "i am just some guy." like the intentional just-some-guy-ism of gas n sip steve. it's sooooo... hes soo.... "emmanuel" as a prayer. "steve" as the performance of mundanity. he's screaming for what he wants in his choice of names. "pls allow me to atone for my sins. pls forgive me entirely and completely and allow me to be holy again" vs "i'm going to be normal now. i've been rejected by the people i thought were family, so now i'm just some guy. i'm going to brush my teeth and work at a store and go on dates with women because that is what people do when they are just some guys." god hes so fucked up and pathetic i want to wrap him in a blanket

#he--- #phin.txt

[lycanthropicture]

having supernatural politics thoughts. i was under the impression that jefferson rooney's sudden appearance and disappearance completely fucked up the supernatural political timeline, and it kinda did. the main problem is that there are contradictions with mentions of both obama and trump during what should be rooney's time in office (pre-LOTUS 12x08). how do you have time for both a second obama term AND trump, but still sandwich rooney in between?

well, yours truly just spent a few hours going thru every mention of obama, rooney, and trump on supernatural.fandom.com (lol), thinking i was going to be able to prove that this isn't technically possible, and buckleming sucks and that they maybe even killed off obama to make room for rooney after which i was going to be like "what did u do to obama, buckleming???" but actually i found a way for the political timeline to be preserved for the most part without any really big leaps in logic. (buckleming is still dumb as hell for this tho bc it is pure coincidence of air dates and throwaway jokes that it works out perfectly)

ok so obama was definitely president for at least one term in universe bc bobby references obamacare in 7x02 which aired in september 2011. the supernatural wiki says he served two terms, but their evidence for the second term is this part of 10x12, which aired in february 2015:

which. idk that doesn't necessarily indicate that obama is still president. it implies it, sure, but doesn't really confirm it. the last real confirmation for obama being president is 7x12, which aired january 13 2012 (dean says the president is a black guy. gonna just assume this is about obama bc if it's not it opens up a whole new can of worms lmaoo). On that date, obama was still in his first term, so we really have no confirmation of a second obama term. which brings us to jefferson rooney.

jefferson rooney's first appearance/mention is in 12x08, which aired december 8th, 2016. This is after the 2016 election but before inauguration for the next term. this implies, at least to me that rooney won the 2012 election and at the time of 12x08 has already lost the 2016 election to donald trump. by the time we get to 13x09 (aired december 7, 2017), trump is president (kaia says her drug dealer is just trying to make it in trump's america).

all this together tells me that in supernatural, obama is president from 2009-2013, rooney is president from 2013-2017 (which irl was obama's second term), and trump is president from 2017-(2021??). simple! right?

NO.

THIS RAISES SO MANY MORE QUESTIONS THAN IT ANSWERS.

first of all, people commonly think of rooney as a republican. generally this has to do with the implication that kelly kline is pro-life, as well as rooney saying yes to lucifer bc he wants to bring about an era of spirituality to america. he's not explicitly stated to be a republican, but he's... republican-coded LOL. makes sense. and it also makes sense for him to have run against obama in 2012. got it. rooney is a republican (and also very clearly a mitt romney stand-in - generally seen as a good guy, religious, ran against obama in 2012).

but how the FUCK did this guy lose to trump. first of all, if theyre both republicans, that means either he lost to trump in the primary (which would be BIG NEWS for sitting president), or trump ran as a third party candidate. ok, i can see that, but what the fuck does THIS line mean then?

how does jefferson rooney become the most popular sitting president in modern history a month after losing his bid for reelection. he literally cannot.

the ONLY explanation that i can come up with is that jefferson rooney MUST have won the november 2016 election. i'm sorry, it's just not making sense to me any other way. which means, jefferson rooney became... indisposed... sometime between december 2016 and december 2017, and somehow this led to donald trump becoming president.

NOW. i very highly doubt that donald trump would ever run as jefferson "i'm satan's little bitch" rooney's running mate (or anyone's running mate for that matter).

ALSO we do have some evidence that trump did run his own campaign for president. in 11x22 (aired may 18, 2016), crowley makes a speech to his demons that parodies trump's campaign announcement speech and uses the phrase "make hell great again." they make the same joke again in 13x02 (aired october 19, 2017) when drexel tells asmodeus that lucifer will return to make hell great again. so trump is almost definitely not rooney's VP.

SO. what does this all add up to? WELL LET ME TELL YOU. here's what i think happened. jefferson rooney went into the november election with TWO major opponents: the democrat challenger (presumably hillary clinton? but unclear) and third party candidate, donald trump. since jefferson is the most popular sitting president or whatever, he wins. but in the US, popular vote does not decide the president; the electoral college does.

when did the electoral college meet and vote in 2016? december 19th. that's right! 11 days AFTER jefferson rooney is last seen on screen (december 8th in LOTUS 12x08, i'll remind you). so presumably, rooney goes missing pretty soon after we see him last.

as for why he goes missing, i'm going with one of two options: 1. he steps down after being possessed because going off the following convo from 12x09 (takes place immediately following LOTUS) :

he either has a 3 day gap in his memory, or he knows he's been possessed by the literal devil and endangered the whole world by letting LUCIFER be PRESIDENT. either way, he steps down bc he questions his own fitness to serve a second term. or 2. he literally just. dies. possibly as a result of a (spoiler alert for two paragraphs from now) demon deal.

what does the electoral college do if the president-elect DIES or steps down before they are able to meet? i cannot believe i researched fucking constitutional law for this stupid fucking post (jk lmao i watched like two cgp grey videos). well, the electors would likely be expected to vote for whoever their national party chooses as a replacement. the logical replacement would be the vice president-elect, but then you need a new vice president-elect as well.

UNLESS. there's a certain third-party candidate that REALLY wants to be president and sees an opening. all he'd have to do is rig the electoral college vote somehow in his favor. hmmm i wonder how donald trump could possibly rig an electoral college-

oh yeah he literally canonically made a demon deal with Crowley (mentioned in 14x20).

SO. theres my answer. problem solved, baby. jefferson rooney went missing after the events of 12x08, 11 days before the electoral college can meet. donald trump sees an opening and makes a demon deal to rig the electoral college votes in his favor, allowing him to essentially steal the election from the most popular sitting president of all time, a month after the election happens. like i said, this deal could have also included getting jefferson rooney... uh... out of the way, as well.

thus, the timeline is TECHNICALLY preserved. well done buckleming! ur stupid president thing only took me a few hours to logic my way out of, and only bc of a throwaway joke from an episode two seasons later that you didnt even write! well done :)

#i dont know if anyone on the planet has any fucking interest in this at all #and i do not know why i did this to myself #but im weirdly proud of this #my magnum opus #a supernatural political timeline dissection #fuck buckleming for making me do this #they forced my hand #anyway idk if anyone's actually gonna read all this but #LMAOO #lmk if u do. gimme ur thoughts #phin.txt #500

[lycanthropicture]

crowley. wanting dean BECAUSE he's cas's. like. imagine being a demon watching an angel fall from grace. he should feel nothing but delight, but instead he feels a twinge of jealousy. he wants what cas has. what dean has given cas. cas's humanity, the purpose he's given him! he's in love with the guy who turns angels into humans. and yeah part of it is genuine desire and love for dean and part of it is this secret wish.. that if dean can pull cas away from heaven maybe he can pull crowley away from hell. if he can give cas a taste of humanity then maybe he can give crowley a taste too. mostly it's!! jessie's girl!!! he wants dean not only because he has actual feelings for dean but because he envies cas's fall from grace. ITS LITERALLY LIKE... wanting dean BECAUSE he's cas's. crowley wanting dean to give him what he gave to cas. humanity. purpose. family. love. also gay sex. its genuine feelings of love mixed up in jealousy of both the relationship itself and everything dean represents. like he doesn't just want dean, he wants what cas has with dean.

#like jessie's girl doesnt have a name bc it's not about the girl! it's literally about jessie #he doesn't want jessie's girl he wants what jessie's girl gave to jessie #im literally vibrating. introducing crowley AKA rick springfield #drowstiel #phin.txt

[lycanthropicture]

no bc crowley loved dean i will not budge on this he literally loved him so much literally the drowley storyline is tragic love and it makes me so sad. im sorry im sorry. drowstiel top ten saddest love triangles of all time?? or at least the version i have in my head where crowley and cas perfectly rival each other as a demon and an angel, both learning to care about and love the world thru their love for dean. crowley loving dean but knowing dean loves cas. crowley saving cas's life despite him a) knowing no one would ever know if he didnt and b) that dean would choose cas over crowley any day of the week. no im sad abt this bye. drowley rights.

#and theyre all trans too #drowstiel #12x12 #phin.txt