#partialhospitalization

[introspectivetransguy]

I have been struggling with my mental health lately. This pic was taken shortly after a long crying spell. There is a lot on my mind. So many losses and stressors. Everyone has been experiencing the anxiety that this pandemic has caused us over the last 15 months. I am no exception. I get my second vaccine shot on Sunday. My partner and twin are already fully vaccinated. There is some relief that things may be getting to a point where we can start doing some "normal" things. It would be wonderful if we get to have a Pride this June.

Over the last 9 months, I have had to cope and grieve the death of my uncle/godfather, my best friend, and another friend. Cancer took my Uncle Tom. He was such a kind and gentle soul. He really made family functions more comfortable. He always wanted to know how I was doing and what I was up to. And he listened. I miss that.

I lost my best friend from California the day after Christmas to an overdose. No one knows if it was accidental or not. But I don't believe he would have taken anything with fentanyl in it if he wasn't suicidal. When I found out, I dissociated on and off for a few days. I was very sad, angry, and suicidal. It was quite a shock... and I have still not fully accepted that he is gone.

A few weeks ago I found out another trans male friend of mine killed himself. He had been struggling mentally for a long time. We knew each other when we both were at the beginning of our transitions 15+ years ago. It's hard to see 2 trans guys, around my age, and on opposite sides of the country kill themselves. It has been very difficult just trying to process it.

Along with the deaths, I have also been trying to cope with the loss of a close friendship with a friend I had for 20+ years. We met in college. We were more of acquaintances and hung out with the same group of people. But we got closer in our 30's and she became one of my closest friends. When my partner and I moved back to RI, we began renting a house from her father on a month to month basis. She is technically a roommate and all her stuff is here, even though she lives at her parents. Over the last year and a half, her substance abuse has increasing made living in this house difficult. About 6 months ago we agreed that she wouldn't drink alcohol here anymore. I also tried to set some other boundaries a month ago and a huge fight ensued. I thought it was settled, but then a few days later she sent me a very hurtful email. She targeted everything she thought would trigger me. And she was right. I ended up hurting myself so bad that I gave myself a concussion. I decided I wasn't ready to talk to her and she got her father to not renew our lease. Now we have to move by the end of the month. Luckily we found housing, but it was very stressful. And losing another close friend, when I don't have many, makes me very sad and like there's something wrong with me.

Another major loss I am dealing with is the relationship I had hoped I would have with my parents. My entire life I have wanted to please my parents, make them proud of me, and make them accept me. I grew up as a highly sensitive child. My parents didn't understand or know how to cope with that. I was often told I was too sensitive and to not feel the way I did. I was almost always told that there was no reason to be anxious and to stop. I had problems talking in public, at school, etc. I got angry and overwhelmed often. I would bang my head against the wall whenever that happened. My parents never told my pediatrician or took me to see a therapist. Their response to my self harm was to punish me. I was invalidated often. This past year, I have tried to talk to my parents about some of their hateful and hurtful posts on Facebook and got ignored. Every interaction I have with them makes me feel unloved and unworthy. Even when they say they love me. I know they do, but they rarely show it. I have decided that it's in my best interest to limit my interaction with them. They do that already. They never call and rarely text me. On Mother's Day I sent my Mom a Bitmoji text of me hanging out a bouquet of flowers saying Happy Mother's Day. I want to show her that I love her, but I'm not going to put all my energy into a toxic relationship anymore. It hurts too much. It's a painful situation. I know it's hard for her too. But I have to do what's healthy for me.

Earlier this year I also began working a lot on my trauma history in individual therapy. I talk a lot about my relationship with my parents, as well as a couple of sexual assaults I have experienced. Other traumatic events include seeing blood and dead bodies after a motorcycle accident and then a car accident in front of my childhood home. I have also been in quite a few car accidents and a motorcycle accident myself.

Due to all the stressors and my past traumas, my depression and anxiety has gotten really bad. It's been a long time since I've felt this bad. My therapist referred me to a partial hospitalization program because I am suicidal and self harming. I was close to having to go inpatient, but I feel like I have to stay alive for my partner and twin. So, I had an evaluation/diagnostic interview done at the hospital and started the program. It is exhausting work. But I'm doing it. The psychiatrist talked to me about the diagnoses she thinks I struggle with. Primary diagnosis is PTSD. Other diagnoses include Bipolar Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Agoraphobia, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and some kind of personality disorder (likely Avoidant and/or Borderline). I don't have to agree with all the diagnoses, I just have to do the work in the program. I am on the BEAR track developed for people struggling with "borderline personality disorder symptoms." I like the therapist and psychiatrist I see every day. It's Monday through Friday 8am-1:30pm. I'm starting to feel less reactive and being more aware of my "rabbit hole" thinking where I keep spiraling from one shitty thing to the next. I hope this program gets me back on track. I was doing really well coping with my mental illnesses with using DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) skills and with the support I had. Then one awful thing after another happened and my mental health declined. I don't want to accept that these things have happened, but I can't move forward until I do.

#mentalhealth #PTSD #bipolardisorder #ocd #socialanxietydisorder #agoraphobia #generalizedanxietydisorder #avoidantpersonalitydisorder #avpd #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #bpd #partialhospitalization #trauma #suicide #acceptance #selfharm

[webcreationdesign]

We schedule an estimate of 25 qualified meetings with Business Development, Program Directors, Clinical Directors, Admissions Directors, Outreach Coordinators. Outreach Marketing focused s on the ideal target. Call me at 786-673-2439 #outreachmarketing #coldcalls #audience #inpatient #outpatient #collaboration #mentalhealth #PartialHospitalization #eatingdisorders #detox #soberlivings #miami #california #texas #massachusetts #webcreationdesign #target #admissions https://www.instagram.com/p/Cb0fO1pOOZa/?utm_medium=tumblr

#outreachmarketing #coldcalls #audience #inpatient #outpatient #collaboration #mentalhealth #partialhospitalization #eatingdisorders #detox #soberlivings #miami #california #texas #massachusetts #webcreationdesign #target #admissions

[whiteoakrecovery-blog]

#partialhospitalization #drugrehabilitation #drugrehabilitationtreatment #detoxtreatment

[ppdaisab]

Day 1 of PHP (Partial Hospitalization Program)

Today was my first day of PHP in what should be about a 6 week program. People mostly spent the time doing a daily “check in” to update the participants on what was going on with them that day and talking about what, if any, treatment goals they’d recently met or were struggling with.

I had to fill out paperwork but the one that kind of stumped me was the “Patient Safety Plan”. It asked what are the “Warning Signs” (thoughts, images, mood, situation, behavior) that a crisis may be developing, which is not very clear to me at the moment. Also asked what “Internal Coping Strategies” (things I can do to take my mind off my problems without contacting another person) I can do and also asked me to identify people that provide good distraction and people whom I can contact for help. It asked what can I do to make my environment more safe, which was an interesting thought provoking question. Finally, it asked what the one thing that is most important to me and worth living for. Of course, that was the easiest question to answer: my children.

A few good things I took from today: 

No one else (yet) has my same situation but everyone was supportive and I got a lot of validation, which felt really nice.

I tried my hand at making a Daily Checklist, version 1 to be in another post. I am curious to see as I go through this program (and the next few years) how this list will develop. I hope it goes from “get the heck out of bed” and “make sure you shower and eat” to ... Idk something more enlightened. Baby steps.

I recognized that I became slightly “triggered” when another classmate explained a little of his situation and said he had “anger issues.” Him being a grandfather to an 8 month old (same age as my baby) and the other participants later talking about how much they like him makes me want to give him a chance. I know that I can get triggered when I see my partner get angry or upset but it’s the first time I’ve recognized getting the fight or flight feeling with someone else just mentioning the words “anger issues.” To be fair, the guy is huge.

New idea of encouraging a baby-mindfulness daily routine of asking my 2 year old, “What was your favorite part of today?” and then sharing my own favorite part of the day. She’s very recently beginning to understand the concepts of “best” and “favorite” so I think this could be really nice for both me to hear what’s going on with her and watch her grow and to also encourage good habits of mindfulness at an early age.

I made a few friends, some of the classmates are parents of small children like me and some are just young people in college, so we connected.

We didn’t get much curriculum in but going over an article titled “10 Ways to Stop Feeling Like a Victim” I got to ask a lot of questions. The first “Way” was to 1. Stop Blaming Others. The counselor went on to focus on forgiving and not holding onto anger towards others, noting that it takes a lot of energy to stay angry over the years. Another note she had was that though an action taken by a person may be unforgivable, you can forgive the person “as a human” and move on. Personally, I think I’ve used fear and continued anger as a strategy to remind myself to avoid situations/people that could make me unsafe, even just letting up in the anger lets me feel like I am unguarded. I think this has come from the years and years of ups and downs of blow ups with my partner and then things going really well for a while, I let my guard down, all the forgiveness in, and BAM another issue would occur and I would feel blindsided and kick myself for becoming vulnerable again. I mentioned this to the group and their general response was that “you don’t have to be angry to be safe.” I think I like this but I think I need to setup a tool or other strategy to help me stay mindful of my personal and my family’s safety.

The second “Way” was to “Be Compassionate to Yourself.” This is an especially tough one for me. I have been a somewhat quiet observer within social situations for pretty much my whole life and am very aware when others are unaware of how annoying or selfish they are. My personal struggle with self-love is that I worry that if I am not harsh towards myself that I will lose my self-awareness and become an ungrateful, selfish, annoying person. The groups’ response was that instead of using self-harshness, use mindfulness tools instead to keep myself grounded. They suggested that if I am worrying so much about becoming selfish so much that I am avoiding self forgiveness then it is unlikely I’d actually hit the other end of the spectrum of selfish, that it is within my personality to be aware of myself in general and it won’t happen. Again, I think I just need to find a new tool that I can put into practice.

Later during a “check in”, one participant re-phrased her need for “isolation” to her need for “solitude” to recharge. I liked that positive vibe.

A negative, surprising (to me) note is that I looked down at my hand in the morning and saw my hand was full of nail marks. I hadn’t even noticed I was doing it. I do know that for all of my adult life I’d thought that my skin pinching and nail digging was a way of “grounding” myself and keeping myself present but I hadn’t realized just how unconsciously I’d been doing it. I know that in the last few years it has also moved on to self-punishment but in this instance, was it back to grounding? Or was it subliminal punishment (I have a ton of guilt)? Later in the day some of the marks swelled to welts, it was kind of gross and kind of interesting.

To bring to class tomorrow: foam roller for back (their chairs lean back and suck), a water  bottle, a binder to organize my papers in, and a new, good hole punch (theirs is basically broken).

#ppd #ppda #postpartumdepression #postpartumdepressionandanxiety #php #partialhospitalization #mentalhealth

[flofindingfreedom]

Long overdue update

So y’all. I’m out. Finally. After the overdose they kept me for a long time, worried I was still suicidal. Eventually they let me back onto the day patient program again. Then they moved me back to residential. Then back to day patient again. Then back to residential AGAIN. I wasn’t suicidal. I wasn’t expressing suicidal thoughts or feelings but I’d also said it was hard to be honest with them so basically no one trusted me. Ugh. They said I had to leave and they didn’t give me many options.

I tried to talk to them. I tried to tell them I wasn’t suicidal and that all my past suicidal thoughts have always come from the Eating Disorder and I really need treatment for THAT. But they didn’t believe me. They decided that my main problem was suicidality. I feel like I was gaslighted. No one believed me. I had a shitty therapist the whole time and they wouldn’t let me switch (which is probably why they just kicked me out tbh) and my psychiatrist was hyper anxious and cautious about everything.

In fact they made such a shit show that I contacted the patient advocate and now they’re conducting an investigation into the way my case was handled.

So I was chewed up and spat out with no support. Sure, they referred me to a local half-day program for substance abuse or depression/anxiety. But I’ve been out for a week and I’ve yet to see any of my eating disorder providers. In my last two weeks at the hospital they stopped offering me individual therapy at all so it’s been a long time.

I’m eating everything on my meal plan. Because if there’s one thing I learnt it’s that I’m alone. No one can save me but myself. All I have in the world is me. And that is terrifying and empowering all at the same time. I just have to eat and eat and eat. Even when it’s hard. Even when I want to cry. I can’t stop because this is so fucking painful I don’t ever want to have to go through it again.

And I want Recovery. I want Recovery so bad it hurts.

#anorexia #eating disorder #recovery #edrecovery #treatment #php #partialhospitalization #hospital #partial hospitalization program #mental illness #mental health #meal plan

[theadventuresofpam]

Today is #NationalComingOutDay and yesterday was #WorldMentalHealthDay. So, here's me, donning my #PanPride hat while at my sixth day of partial hospitalization. Be proud of who you are, and make sure to take care of yourself, kids. #pansexual #queer #proudqueer #pride #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #depression #partialhospitalization #selfcare

#mentalhealthawareness #worldmentalhealthday #nationalcomingoutday #pride #proudqueer #depression #pansexual #partialhospitalization #panpride #queer #selfcare #mentalhealth

[recoveringqueens]

Your level of care does not define how "sick" you are.

#residential #partialhospitalization #php #res #sick #relapse #suicide #bodypositive #youareenough #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #bulimia #bulimiarecovery #orthorexia #orthorexiarecovery #osfed #osfedrecovery

[united-recovery-project]

Levels of Care Offered in Drug Rehab Orlando Facilities

At United Recovery Project, we believe that every patient can heal from addiction through compassionate care customized to their needs. We provide a range of rehab programs for alcohol and drug addiction as well as co-occurring mental health conditions in a supportive and safe environment with full-time clinical and medical staff.

Levels of Care Offered

People living with mental health problems and addiction often benefit most from comprehensive care offered at United Recovery Project. To help in fostering long-term healing, we offera full continuum of substance addiction treatment such as medical detox, partial hospitalization, residential,inpatient and outpatient treatment levels of care.

Medical Detox

The first step in most recovery programs is often medical detox, which allows patients to undergo alcohol and drug withdrawal under the supervision and care of medical professionals. This supportive and safe clinical setting can help those battling with addiction stay committed to recovery goals and ease some of the discomfort of withdrawal with effective medications. However, it is essential for patients to keep in mind that medications are only used with an approval of a medical professional.

Residential

Mostpatients may step down to residential treatment after medical detox is complete. Patients in residential care live full time at the United Recovery Project facility. An around-the-clock supervision in the residential treatment model provides support and accountability in the early stages of recovery. During the day, patient take part in reflective group or individual therapy and return to comfortableresidential living quarters at night.

Partial Hospitalization

This is a step between more flexible intensive and intensive care offered by outpatient and outpatient treatments. Partialhospitalization givespatientsthe opportunity to progressively gain confidence in their recovery. Fewer clinical hours offer time for recreational therapies while continuing to provide a chance to practice new coping skills in a supportive surrounding.

Intensive Outpatient

At United Recovery Project, patients in this stage of care may come froma sober living environment or an off-site residency in a supportive home. Notwithstanding, clients in this level continue to participate in individual and group therapy on a part-time basis, where they build skills and gain insight requires for a lasting recovery.

Outpatient

During outpatient care, patients live off-site in sober living housing or at home and undergo treatment at United Recovery Project outpatient center on a part-time basis. In between treatment sessions, patients gradually return to professional and familial responsibilities.

Treatment allows for accountability and continued support in the face of new challenges. If you are looking for a treatment center for yourself or your loved one, get in touch with us at the United Recovery Project.

[thehomiealicia]

Today is the day I officially start partial hospitalization. Today is the day I officially start recovery ❤

#Recovery #Depression #StrongHospital #PartialHospitalization #SelfHarm #Strong #Today #Proud