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merakilyy · 4 years

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Tales of an Unsuccessful Matchmaker

Six months after the Guanyin temple, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji still aren’t together. Jingyi snaps because if his oblivious seniors can't talk about their feelings, then Jingyi is going to take matters into his own hands and make them talk.

Naturally, he enlists the help of Lan Xichen to matchmake a little.

Just a little.

(In which Sizhui is 100% of Jingyi's impulse control, Wangji is lonely, Jingyi may or may not break into the Hanshi via window, and Xichen is surprisingly permissive.)

Tags: Wangxian, post-canon, matchmaking, accidental secret marriage, Jingyi being a menace who just wants his otp to get together already

(On AO3) Wordcount: almost 7600

~~~

If you asked Lan Sizhui, he would describe Lan Jingyi as a cesspool of bad ideas. He would say it with affection and add that Jingyi is still a very talented cultivator whose penchant for more creative solutions has provided much entertainment during their night hunts and saved his life at least once, but it was unofficially Sizhui’s job to keep Jingyi’s worst impulses in line.

However, with Sizhui travelling with Wen Ning outside Gusu for several months, there was no one left to temper Jingyi’s wilder ideas.

Furthermore, Sizhui had inadvertently planted another questionable idea into the mind of Lan Jingyi in his most recent letter.

Lan Jingyi,

I hope that you are well and that you have not caused Grandmaster Lan to suffer another aneurysm.

Uncle Wen Ning and I went to visit the Burial Mounds. It is just as barren as the last time we were there but Uncle Wen Ning told me stories of how Wei- qianbei learned to restrain the resentful energy so they could farm the land and grow radishes. No potatoes, though. It is not a nice place, and even the best memories are bittersweet, but it is a part of my past and I am happy to learn all that I can about my first family. Uncle Wen Ning says Wei- qianbei even managed to grow lotuses in the Burial Mounds. Can you imagine? I thought Uncle Wen Ning was teasing me until I saw three dried lotus seeds in the dirt.

Briefly, Jingyi wondered when the fearsome Ghost General became Uncle Wen Ning to Sizhui, to himself, and to all the other junior disciples. Was it before they accidentally turned Wen Ning green from an aggressive plant spirit, or was it after Wen Ning paused a night hunt so he could rescue a kitten from a tree as they all watched? Jingyi didn’t ponder this very long; his thoughts quickly drifted elsewhere as he continued reading.

After we left the Burial Mounds, we ran into Wei- qianbei and Lil’ Apple in Yiling. He says that he’s been travelling on his own for the past few months. I was surprised that he’s been gone for so long without Hanguang-jun at his side. He seems tired. Later, I asked Uncle Wen Ning about Hanguang-jun and he simply said Wei- qianbei and Hanguang-jun know each other best. I am not sure what that means but Uncle Wen Ning did not say more on that subject. Before Wei-qianbei parted ways with us, I offered him the lotus seeds I found in the Burial Mounds but Wei- qianbei refused. He said that I should hold onto them until he can settle down somewhere to plant them. Do you think he’ll ever come back to Cloud Recesses?

Sizhui’s letter went on a bit more to say he and Uncle Wen Ning were going to Lanling next and that they might visit Sect Leader Young Mistress Jin but Jingyi’s mind had already begun churning with a new idea.

Sizhui had said nothing about whether or not Wei Wuxian was lonely but he was alone! And tired! With only that stupid donkey! So of course he was lonely without Hanguang-jun at his side. Furthermore, Uncle Wen Ning was the one who knew the most about Wei- qianbei and Hanguang-jun’s relationship and describing them as those who know each other best is basically confirmation that Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are soulmates.

Plus, Wei-qianbei was waiting to settle down somewhere. Somewhere with enough space to grow lotus flowers. But, also somewhere where Sizhui could easily give him the seeds which meant Cloud Recesses. And, since Hanguang-jun lived in Cloud Recesses, Wei-qianbei must be waiting for Hanguang-jun to confess so he can settle down in the Jingshi. In Cloud Recesses.

Rather proud of his ability to read between the lines, Jingyi began to formulate a plan with his newfound knowledge.

~~~

When he woke up the next day, Jingyi reviewed his plan from the previous night and almost considered scrapping it as he realized he forgot to account for Hanguang-jun’s feelings. Even though Uncle Wen Ning almost confirmed Hanguang-jun’s feelings, how well did Uncle Wen Ning really know Hanguang-jun?

As he finished tying his forehead ribbon in place, Jingyi decided to shelve his plan until he could properly ascertain Hanguang-jun’s feelings towards Wei- qianbei . For now, he decided to simply gather evidence of Hanguang-jun’s feelings.

Evidence, as it turned out, was not difficult to find.

As he headed towards the cafeteria for breakfast, Jingyi saw Hanguang-jun sitting on the porch of the Jingshi in a chair that Jingyi had only ever seen Wei Wuxian use before. Hanguang-jun was impeccably dressed as always, an intricate guan woven into his hair and without a wrinkle to be seen on his spotless white robes. With a pot of tea balanced on the window ledge beside him, Hanguang-jun was reading a letter. Ducking behind a pillar, Jingyi watched as Hanguang-jun flipped through page after page of writing. There were so many pages that Jingyi initially thought the letter might actually be documents from other Sects requiring mediation from the Chief Cultivator. But after taking a closer look, Jingyi saw how a few pages contained doodles in the margins and only one person could be so shameless. Even without seeing the messy scrawl, Jingyi knew it was from Wei Wuxian because no one else would send such ridiculously long-winded letters — especially not to Hanguang-jun. No one else dared send long, verbose letters to a man whose Sect literally had rules that restricted the use of words.

Do not use frivolous words, speak meagerly for too many words will bring harm, do not take your own words lightly, be careful with your words, Lan Jingyi recites in the back of his mind. After having copied the rules so many times, they are easily imprinted in his mind. Wei- qianbei definitely broke all of the rules , Jingyi thinks while he observes Hanguang-jun’s expressions as he reads.

Unlike Sizhui, Jingyi did not have the privilege of being raised by Hanguang-jun for most of his childhood. It was more accurate to say Jingyi, like most members of Gusu Lan, knew of Hanguang-jun instead of knowing Hanguang-jun.

Still, Jingyi has taken enough classes with Hanguang-jun to be familiar enough with major changes in Hanguang-jun’s expressions. Even if Jingyi can’t name the soft expression on Hanguang-jun’s face right now, Jingyi recognizes the look. He saw it at Dafan Mountain, when he requested Mo Xuanyu be moved into the Jingshi, when he and Wei- qianbei rescued them from the Burial Mounds, and after the Guanyin Temple.

It was an expression reserved for Wei Wuxian.

Hanguang-jun’s expression barely changes as he continues reading. Occasionally, Hanguang-jun will flip back to an earlier page with an amused huff.

This should be the most boring endeavor Jingyi has ever undertaken. He has never been a good scout, and even worse at night patrols because he would get bored so quickly.

But, watching the subtle shifts in Hanguang-jun’s expression is more entertaining than Jingyi would have guessed. He is no expert at reading Hanguang-jun, or at reading people in general, but it is fun to guess at the shifts in Hanguang-jun’s expressions. Even Jingyi can see the soft, deeply rooted affection Hanguang-jun has for Wei- qianbei in how he holds the paper with such care, in how he is possibly smiling at Wei- qianbei ’s little drawings, and in how Hanguang-jun looks very lonely sitting on the Jingshi porch alone.

Ouyang Zizhen would be having a field day with this information, Jingyi thinks.

Jingyi is so lost in his thoughts between what his friends would say about observing Hanguang-jun and actually observing Hanguang-jun that he startles when Hanguang-jun himself says, “Breakfast will begin soon. Do not be late.”

Carefully tucking the thick wad of paper into his sleeve, Hanguang-jun stands and makes his way to the communal dining area.

Jingyi has too much dignity to scurry out from his hiding spot right before Hanguang-jun’s sharp eyes. Luckily, Hanguang-jun is not interested in punishing Jingyi and moves toward the dining area. But, before leaving, he says, “Eavesdropping is forbidden, Lan Jingyi.”

Just as Hanguang-jun’s back disappears around another corner, the warning gong for breakfast rings.

Flustered, Jingyi tries to collect himself as he scrambles to his feet. He is enough of a Lan to not run, but he is definitely pushing the limits of speed walking so he will not be late for breakfast.

~~~

Having deemed that morning’s events to be sufficient evidence of Hanguang-jun’s deep yearning for the return of Wei- qianbei , Jingyi decides he needs someone who knows Hanguang-jun well enough to help him formulate a plan.

Ideally, Sizhui would have been the best partner. Not only has Sizhui been raised by Hanguang-jun, Sizhui is also Jingyi’s equal and a close friend which would make the need for formalities unnecessary. Sizhui is also the best at curbing Jingyi's wildest ideas.

But, Sizhui is still travelling with Uncle Wen Ning.

The only other person who knows Hanguang-jun well enough to assist Jingyi is Zewu-jun who is...not exactly in seclusion, but he is not not in seclusion either. Jingyi doesn’t understand it either.

But, Jingyi does know that while Zewu-jun himself has not been seen leaving the Hanshi, Zewu-jun is perfectly free to leave if he so desired. More importantly, people are allowed into the Hanshi. Confident that Zewu-jun would do anything to help Hanguang-jun, Jingyi decides to seek his aid.

Without Sizhui around to slow Jingyi down, to encourage Jingyi to sleep on his plans before enacting them, Jingyi decides to put his plan into action the first chance he gets.

That evening, armed with nothing but the bare bones of a plan and his desire to help Lan Wangji, Jingyi marches up to the doors of the Hanshi for the first time in his life.

Seeing the candlelight flicker through the open window of the Hanshi, Jingyi takes a deep breath and knocks.

He meant to gracefully entire the Hanshi, politely and through the door. He would bow at the full angle, speak at the proper volume, and would present his objective in a calm, respectable proposal. There was a plan, and Jingyi had intended to carry out that plan.

What Jingyi did not account for was Sect Leader Lan’s refusal to open the door. Like any self-respecting cultivator of the Gusu Lan Sect, Jingyi was reasonably terrified of Lan Xichen. But, dire circumstances call for extreme measures. With no other choice, Jingyi turns to the window.

Seeing that there is no one else in the vicinity, Jingyi messily pushes his long sleeves up to his elbows before leaping at the window ledge.

Admittedly, Jingyi didn’t think it was a good idea either. He is basically breaking into the Hanshi, breaking hundreds of rules, and Zewu-jun might run him through with Shuoyue if Jingyi is mistaken for an intruder. Which...Jingyi technically is. But Jingyi tells himself this is a necessary evil, that Zewu-jun is too level-headed to respond with Shuoyue, and that Hanguang-jun’s happiness is on the line. He is still reciting this in his head, like a mantra, as he backs up and dives directly into Zewu-jun’s window.

Jingyi miscalculates his own power and ends up jumping through the window entirely, landing in a flailing, graceless heap as Zewu-jun watches from behind a desk. Zewu-jun’s face is composed as always and his eyes aren’t even open, but Jingyi feels judged as he picks himself up from the ground.

“Sect Leader,” Jingyi salutes, robes askew and regulating ribbon crooked across his forehead. He had already broken enough rules, he figures being respectful to his Sect Leader might mediate the number of lines he’d have to copy as punishment.

“You should not be here,” Lan Xichen’s voice is...impassive. Where he once faced the world with a serene smile, Xichen now faces directly ahead, eyes closed, as still as jade. He does not even bother to address Jingyi directly.

In retrospect, Jingyi will later realize that he has interrupted Lan Xichen’s nightly meditation.

At the moment, Jingyi is more than a little desperate. “Sect Leader Lan,” he bows again, even though Lan Xichen’s eyes remain closed. “I know you are...taking a personal leave from many of your duties, but this is a problem that has plagued Gusu Lan for several months now.”

“Then I suggest you take it to Wangji,” Xichen says, unmoved, in the same placid tone. “Hanguang-jun is more than capable of resolving any issues that have arisen.”

Even though Jingyi’s arms are getting tired and Zewu-jun still isn’t looking at him, Jingyi holds the salute. Just in case. “But Zewu-jun,” Jingyi says, trying very hard to not sound like he is challenging Zewu-jun’s authority, “This is an issue that concerns Hanguang-jun directly.”

Immediately, Zewu-jun’s eyes open and he finally looks at Jingyi. “What is the situation?” Xichen asks, concerned.

“Hanguang-jun is sad!” Jingyi says. It is only his rigorous Gusu Lan education that allows him to will his arms from shaking as he continues to maintain his salute.

“At ease,” Xichen says, giving up on his nightly meditation. “Wangji has been in mourning for a long time but he has been content since Wei- gongzi ’s return.”

Folding his arms in his sleeves politely, Jingyi protests while trying very hard to not sound like he is protesting. “I have evidence that Hanguang-jun is sad!” he says.

“Please take a seat,” Zewu-jun sighs and waves a hand at the cushion before him. He waits for Jingyi to kneel before continuing. “What does this evidence entail?”

“Hanguang-jun was sitting in front of the Jingshi alone before breakfast!”

Jingyi can see that Zewu-jun is unconvinced, even if Lan Xichen’s expression does not change. “Wangji often spends time alone. Wangji enjoys solitude.”

“But he was lonely! He looked lonely!” Later, Sizhui will smack Jingyi for impertinence and Lan Qiren will assign more handstands.

Now, Lan Xichen is unruffled at Jingyi’s boldness and is even amused at the extent of Jingyi’s sheer brazenness. “You have seen Wangji alone before,” Xichen points out calmly. “Why the concern now?”

“Because Wei- qianbei isn’t with Hanguang-jun!”

“Wangji’s connection with Wei- gongzi is profound. It is not our place as outsiders to interfere.” Zewu-jun says this with the weighty experience of someone who has attained this knowledge firsthand in the worst way.

“But they still aren’t together! Lan Sizhui has written to me so much about how lonely Wei- qianbei is! Read for yourself!” Having at least the foresight to prepare himself beforehand, Jingyi pulls Sizhui’s crumpled letter from his sleeve and just barely resists the temptation to thrust it in Lan Xichen’s face. At the last minute, he remembers some manners and offers the letter to Zewu-jun with both hands and lowers his head..

Taking the proffered letter, Xichen skims the contents of Sizhui’s neat handwriting. To Jingyi’s frustration, Xichen’s composed expression does not change.

“Lan Jingyi,” Xichen says slowly, choosing his words with care as he looks back up at Jingyi, “I understand that you are frustrated.”

Jingyi huffs a laugh under his breath — as if frustrated even begins to cover how he feels , Jingyi thinks — before he remembers who he is speaking to and tries to look abashed over his rudeness.

Brushing past the infraction, Xichen continues, “And I understand that you wish to see Hanguang-jun and your Wei- qianbei together again. But, you are not the first to attempt such an undertaking.”

“But Zewu-jun! They are clearly pining and miserable without each other!”

If Jingyi had been paying attention, he would have realized that Sizhui’s letter was actually not very good evidence as it made no explicit mention of Wei Wuxian actually missing Hanguang-jun. It was sheer fortune that Zewu-jun happened to already agree with him.

“Zewu-jun,” Jingyi begs in a last attempt to sway Xichen to his side, “They use their birth names with each other.”

Xichen sighs. “I will not aid this endeavor of yours, but I see no reason to prevent you from undertaking such a project. So long as you operate within our Sect rules, I will not stop you. In exchange, I expect routine updates on how this project of yours proceeds. I invite you to join me for tea in one week's time so you may inform me of developments in the situation.”

Much later, once this ploy has reached its conclusion, Lan Sizhui will hit Jingyi over the head for his audacity in breaking into the Hanshi, for his disrespect in speaking back at Zewu-jun, and for violating curfew.

For now, Jingyi is simply grateful that Zewu-jun agrees with him.

~~~

The first plan is fairly benign.

What Jingyi needs is to first bring Wei Wuxian back to Cloud Recesses. So, he simply sends a letter to Wei Wuxian lamenting how lonely Hanguang-jun is and how worried he is for Hanguang-jun and won’t Wei- qianbei come visit an old friend in his time of need?

Wei- qianbei, Jingyi had written.

How long do you intend to run around with that stupid donkey? Don’t you know Hanguang-jun is sick with worry here in Cloud Recesses? Hanguang-jun is very lonely without your presence and it is very rude of you to take advantage of Hanguang-jun’s kindness and then abandon him. You must come back and take responsibility for the suffering you are putting Hanguang-jun through!

It could have been a good plan.

Except, Jingyi had no way of knowing the sheer quantity of letters Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji sent to each other. The letters were constant, daily updates of even the most mundane events. When Jingyi had happened upon Lan Wangji reading Wei Wuxian’s letters in front of the Jingshi, Lan Wangji had actually been rereading and reorganizing a stack of all the letters Wei Wuxian had sent that month and not, as Jingyi had assumed, been reading a single letter.

Since Wei Wuxian gave Lan Wangji timelines of where he intended to go next and when he would arrive, Wangji had been able to leave Wei Wuxian letters and little gifts in every village he passed through.

So, Wei Wuxian was confident that Lan Wangji was in perfect health and no more worried than he usually is.

What Jingyi did not know was that Wei Wuxian also knew how much Lan Wangji missed him. He missed Wangji just as much, but he had some travelling to do first, some loose ends to tie up, and an identity to reclaim.

A couple weeks after Jingyi had sent his letter, Hanguang-jun summons him to the yashi.

“Chief Cultivator,” Jingyi bows. “Hanguang-jun requested the presence of this disciple?” While formal speech is not something that flows off Jingyi’s tongue, he has never been directly summoned by the Chief Cultivator Lan Wangji. Jingyi is most comfortable with Hanguang-jun as a teacher and mentor, but he figures that it is better to err on the side of caution and maintain the utmost formality.

“Lan Jingyi,” Wangji nods his acknowledgement. “I recently received a letter from Wei Ying.”

Jingyi blinks, unsure where Hanguang-jun is going with this and why Hanguang-jun is telling him.

“Wei Ying has informed me that he has recently received an interesting letter,” Wangji continues.

Jingyi blanches.

To his horror, Lan Wangji reaches into his sleeve and pulls out the exact letter Jingyi had sent off weeks earlier.

“I believe this is your doing.”

Jingyi splutters, his mind scrambling for a defense even though he knows there is none he can provide without giving away his entire plan.

Luckily, Hanguang-jun saves Jingyi from answering by continuing to speak. “Do not make assumptions about others,” he recites, listing the rules Jingyi has broken. “Do not exaggerate, and do not act in bad faith. Be careful with your words.”

“This disciple apologizes for his interference,” Jingyi says as he prostrates himself before Hanguang-jun. “This disciple welcomes any punishment Hanguang-jun sees fit to bestow.”

“Rise.” Despite his new position, Wangji is as uncomfortable with being formally bowed to as Jingyi is formally bowing. “You will copy the rules two times, supervised by Lan Qiren in the library pavilion.”

Which is a very light punishment, all things considered, and Jingyi is well aware of how lenient Hanguang-jun is being.

In his haste to leave the yashi, Jingyi does not realize that Hanguang-jun did not quote do not tell lies amongst the rules he had broken.

~~~

“I sent a letter to Wei- qianbei,” Jingyi informs Lan Xichen in the Hanshi the next day, after his punishment is complete.

“Am I correct in assuming it was unsuccessful?” Xichen says mildly as he pours a cup of tea for Jingyi.

“Wei- qianbei sent the letter I sent him back to Hanguang-jun,” Jingyi grumbles, accepting the tea.

With a deeply entertained smile, Zewu-jun hides his amusement behind his own tea cup.

~~~

The second plan is an objectively terrible idea.

The flaw with Lan Xichen’s hands off approach to Jingyi’s whole endeavor is that he is unable to point out the glaring flaws in Jingyi’s plans.

Because of Sizhui’s brief mention of the lotus seeds he uncovered in the Burial Mounds, Jingyi is reminded that Wei- qianbei was not always the Yiling Laozu or a vagrant wanderer. Before he was forced to raise corpses in battle, Wei Wuxian had been the head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang who spent his days surrounded by water and lotus flowers.

Consequently, Jingyi has been inspired to plant some lotuses in Cloud Recesses. Growing lotuses, a plant that Jingyi has only seen once in his life and has never handled, requires a pond. A pond, which would require some source of still water which would also require diverting a river. Or building an aqueduct. Or having the means to hire someone else to build an aqueduct. Or use demonic energy to redirect the flow of water.

Neither hiring someone nor using demonic energy is a viable option but Jingyi pushes those logistics to the side as a problem to be addressed for later.

Instead, during a break between training sessions, Jingyi finds himself a shovel and gets to work.

Jingyi is standing in a shallow ditch he has dug out himself behind the Jingshi, right under a window, when he hears Lan Qiren’s familiar bellow coming from too close behind him.

“Lan Jingyi! What do you think you are doing?!”

Jingyi turns to face Lan Qiren. Holding the shovel, Jingyi bows before answering. “Digging?”

“Disgraceful!” Lan Qiren’s face is redder than Jingyi has ever seen it, even redder than when Wei Wuxian paraded around in front of everyone in Hanguang-jun’s under robes at the Burial Mounds. “Look at your robes! This is unacceptable. We do not need a trench in Cloud Recesses. Fill it back up.”

In his endless wisdom, Jingyi protests. “But wouldn’t a lotus pond be nice?”

“Do Cloud Recesses look like Lotus Pier to you!?” Lan Qiren snaps. “We are not in Yunmeng. Did Wangji put you up to this ludicrous task?”

“Of course not! If Hanguang-jun had planted a lotus pond, then Wei- qianbei would be here!”

Which is exactly the wrong thing to say as Jingyi discovers when he finds himself back in the library pavilion, with Lan Qiren, copying the rules forty times in handstands.

And he had to fill the earth back in.

~~~

“I am no expert on the cultivation of lotus plants but I suspect Cloud Recesses is too cold. Yunmeng is far warmer than we are and has milder winters.”

“How was I supposed to know that!?” Jingyi grumbles, wrists still sore from his punishment.

Xichen does not shrug, but his demeanor heavily suggests a shrug. “In any case, Shufu is rather opposed to Wangji’s relationship with Wei Wuxian.”

“Well I know that now .”

~~~

The third plan is indirectly inspired by Lan Qiren himself when he assigns Jingyi the task of delivering Cloud Recesses’ excess harvest to the nearby villages. Jingyi is carrying several baskets of napa bundles and medicinal herbs on his dan when he passes by a field of peppers.

The bright green peppers remind Jingyi of that day in Yi City, when Wei- qianbei tried to claim his lethally spicy porridge was supposed to be medicine. A claim he made to several junior disciples of Gusu Lan. Gusu Lan: the sect with the most experience with medicinal cooking.

At the time, Jingyi thought he was more likely to choke on Mo- xiansheng ’s terrible cooking than die from corpse powder poisoning.

Now, the entire experience has stirred Jingyi’s thoughts as he formulates another plan on how to lure Wei Wuxian back to Cloud Recesses.

The thing is, while Jingyi actually has very little concrete knowledge of what Wei Wuxian enjoys eating, he does know that Yunmeng Jiang is known for their spicy and flavourful cuisine. Sizhui has also mentioned Wei- qianbei ’s penchant for spicier dishes in his letters, as has Uncle Wen Ning in his stories. And, when they had stayed at inns with Hanguang-jun and Wei- qianbei , Hanguang-jun always ordered uncharacteristically spicy dishes and requested additional chili oil.

With this evidence, Jingyi concludes that Wei Wuxian is a degenerate gremlin who has burned his tongue.

A degenerate gremlin whom Hanguang-jun is desperately in love with.

It is not a secret that Wei Wuxian despises Gusu cuisine for its bland tastelessness and bitter medicinal properties.

But if someone were to adjust Cloud Recesses’ diet to include more spices, Jingyi thinks, then Wei- qianbei will enjoy the food and stay with Hanguang-jun.

“Are these spicy?” With his mind made up, Jingyi asks the farmer tending to the peppers as he unloads the last of his napa and herbs.

“The spiciest in Gusu!” The farmer responds.

Jingyi has no conception of how spicy that is but it must be spicy enough to make Cloud Recesses’ dishes flavourful enough for Wei- qianbei .

“Here,” the farmer pulls a bundle from his pocket and presses it into Jingyi’s hand. “Take this huajiao as well. It is a numbing spice imported from Yunmeng. It is too strong for my wife and I but I am sure a young master of an illustrious Sect like yourself will find some use for it.”

There is no rule against accepting gifts and it is not unusual for disciples to return with goods gifted by grateful farmers so Jingyi doesn’t feel bad about taking both the huajiao and a basket of peppers.

It takes another couple weeks until Jingyi is rotated onto food preparation in the kitchens again. In those weeks, Jingyi observed Hanguang-jun receive another bundle of letters from Wei-qianbei, request additional pillows and bedding for the Jingshi, and told Jingyi not to fill in the ditch he had dug behind the Jingshi. Jingyi filed this as further proof that Hanguang-jun is desperately missing Wei-qianbei and told Zewu-jun as such.

For his part, Zewu-jun simply sipped his tea and listened to Jingyi’s incessant chatter without judgement.

In the kitchen, Jingyi is standing by the stoves, watching the row of pots and pans slowly cook over the fire. The packet of huajiao and peppers are burning in his sleeve.

Briefly, it does occur to Jingyi that he really does not know how much spice is necessary to adequately flavour an entire dish. Thinking on how red and colourful the dishes Hanguang-jun served to Wei- qianbei were, Jingyi figures more spice is better.

When no one is looking, Jingyi slips the peppers and huajiao into each dish, pouring equal amounts into the pot of rice, the pan of leafy vegetables, and the crock of soup.

He uses up everything the farmer had given him.

Belatedly, Jingyi considers that he maybe should have kept some of the spice for the next time he is on kitchen duty, but decides that murmurs of Gusu Lan serving spiced food on one occasion will be enough to at least temporarily bring Wei Wuxian back to Cloud Recesses. Wei- qianbei will inevitably come if only to question Hanguang-jun and Jingyi is rather optimistic that he will be able to convince Wei- qianbei to stay. He just needs Wei- qianbei to be in Gusu.

As he waits for everyone to be seated for dinner, Jingyi is almost vibrating with anticipation. Lan Qiren does not notice, simply giving Jingyi a cursory glare of disapproval. Hanguang-jun, however, does notice. He gives Jingyi an admonitory look, indicating that he knows Jingyi is up to something, but says nothing as he takes his seat at the main table.

Once the dinner finally commences, Jingyi is disappointed to see that the dishes appear to be the same mild colouring they always are. Then the disciple beside him gags on an unsuspecting bite, coughing and spewing his rice back into his bowl.

Looking around, Jingyi sees that several sect members are coughing and choking on the rice. It is no better for those who are attempting to suppress the spice with the soup.

Lan Qiren’s face is dangerously red and he looks like he very much wants to be yelling, but no longer has control over his own mouth. He sits panting heavily, trying to relax his burning throat and cool his tongue.

Only Hanguang-jun is unbothered, calmly bringing bite after bite to his mouth. His cheeks are slightly flushed from the spice, but he appears otherwise unaffected.

Trying his concoction for himself, Jingyi fares much less well than Hanguang-jun as he breaks out in a string of violent coughs. Despite the inoffensive colouring, the spices are very strong even if it is less spicy than the concoction Wei Wuxian fed them.

Still, Jingyi can’t feel his tongue.

~~~

As Lan Qiren is angry enough to want nothing to do with Jingyi and Hanguang-jun is mired under stacks of paperwork, Jingyi’s punishment is left to Lan Xichen’s supervision.

“That explains the delay in my dinner that evening,” Xichen ponders aloud as he watches Jingyi balance in a handstand against the wall of the Hanshi, holding a brush over a half filled sheet of paper.

“Grandmaster has banned me from the kitchens indefinitely.” Jingyi barely bites back a groan as a splotch of ink drips from his brush, marring the characters he has already copied.

“Shh,” Xichen prompts gently, resuming his own meditation. “There are two hundred and eighty-three copies remaining.”

~~~

Despite the monumental failure of his previous attempts, Jingyi’s zealousness has not waned. If anything, continuing to watch Hanguang-jun walk around all alone and very lonely has only hardened his conviction. He is ready to enact his fourth plan which involves Fairy, Fairy finding Wei Wuxian, a long chase through clear fields with no trees to hide in, and the timely arrival of Hanguang-jun.

Jingyi is halfway through writing a letter to Jin Ling to negotiate borrowing Fairy when he receives his own letter from Sizhui.

Lan Jingyi,

I hope you have not pushed Grandmaster any closer to a Qi derivation in my absence. Uncle Wen Ning and I left Lanling last week. (Jin Ling sends his regards.) I will be returning to Cloud Recesses soon. But first, Uncle Wen Ning and I will be making a detour to Qinghe to pick up a parcel for Wei- qianbei before traveling to Gusu together. Wei- qianbei says he will reconvene with us in Caiyi. Hanguang-jun will be with him.

Take care, and do not break too many rules in the coming days. I have much to share with you of my adventures, of what I have seen, and the many stories Uncle Wen Ning has been telling me.

Lan Sizhui

Jingyi is ecstatic, pushing his half finished letter to Jin Ling aside. With Hanguang-jun and Wei- qianbei together, they would finally talk out their deep-seated, all-consuming love for one another and Hanguang-jun would finally stop being lonely.

He finishes drafting his letter to Jin Ling anyway, just in case he still needs to resort to Fairy.

A couple days later, Hanguang-jun leaves Cloud Recesses.

As soon as Jingyi sees Hanguang-jun’s back disappear around the curved path leading down the mountain, he quickly walks to the Hanshi.

Before Zewu-jun, Jingyi still carries out the motions of bowing even though his arms are sloppy and his angle is sloppy.

“Lan Jingyi,” Zewu-jun nods, gesturing for Jingyi to take a seat at the table. “There are still three days until our regular scheduled tea time,” Xichen says mildly, pouring Jingyi a cup of tea anyway.

“Hanguang-jun has left Cloud Recesses to find Wei- qianbei . Shouldn’t we follow Hanguang-jun?”

To Jingyi’s surprise, Xichen is as placid as ever and completely unbothered, taking a slow sip of his own tea before answering. “There is no need. Wangji has informed me that he will return tomorrow with Wei Wuxian, Lan Sizhui, and Wen Qionglin.”

Jingyi only sips his tea out of politeness. “But Sect Leader, shouldn’t we follow Hanguang-jun to make sure he finally confesses? Wei- qianbei is so annoying and doesn’t realize how much he loves Hanguang-jun!” Belatedly, it occurs to Jingyi that it is bad form to be insulting a senior in front of his Sect Leader, nevermind a senior who is going to become his Sect Leader’s brother-in-law.

But Lan Xichen is unphased, having long since grown accustomed to Jingyi’s brand of chaos. “While there is no harm in facilitating opportunities for Wangji and Wei- gongzi to explore their feelings, we cannot force them to speak what is not ready to be spoken.”

“But they’ve been doing this for so long!”

“Jingyi, you are not the first to attempt to push Wei- gongzi and Wangji together. They are both deeply stubborn people. All we can do is wait. Fate has blessed them and bonded their souls together. I trust that Wangji will find his happiness.”

“Watching Wei- gongzi and Hanguang-jun together is infuriating,” Jingyi is Lan enough to not pout, but his displeasure is clear.

Zewu-jun hums softly, sympathizing with Jingyi. He has watched Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji dance around each other for two lifetimes now and is still watching. “We can wait at the entrance tomorrow for their return.”

Looking up in surprise, Jingyi asks, “Sect Leader is leaving his seclusion?”

“I am not in seclusion,” Xichen answers. “Only in mourning and taking time for advanced self-reflection.”

Jingyi still doesn’t really understand the difference. The purpose of seclusion is precisely for mourning and self-reflection, was it not?

In any case, Jingyi wasn’t about to argue semantics with his Sect Leader.

~~~

At the entrance to Cloud Recesses, Jingyi stands with Lan Xichen as they wait for Hanguang-jun to return with Wei Wuxian and Sizhui, and Uncle Wen Ning. Zewu-jun is only carrying Liebing. Shuoyue is nowhere to be seen, but the usual guards are only a few paces back in case anything unexpected were to happen.

They take up their posts in the late afternoon. Jingyi had proposed waiting in the morning, but Zewu-jun had predicted otherwise. “I suspect Wei- gongzi will want to explore the vendors in Caiyi and Wangji will allow Wei- gongzi such indulgences,” he had said, shooing Jingyi off to training.

Now, Jingyi has to admit that Zewu-jun was correct.

They have barely been waiting for ten minutes when they hear Wei Wuxian’s laughter drift through the trees. Moments later, Hanguang-jun appears first, making the last turn that leads the path directly into Cloud Recesses.

Zewu-jun gives Jingyi a look as Jingyi vibrates with excitement, but says nothing to admonish Jingyi’s restlessness. They watch as Lan Wangji leads Lil' Apple by the reins, Wei Wuxian sitting astride Lil' Apple’s back with Chenqing tucked into his belt. Sizhui and Wen Ning follow closely behind them, carrying baskets of assorted fresh fruits.

Perched precariously on Lil' Apple, Wei Wuxian raises a hand, waving vigorously at Xichen and Jingyi’s waiting figures.

Xichen simply smiles his welcome, but Jingyi waves back just as excitedly.

“So?” Jingyi asks, not even trying to minimize his excitement once they are all within Cloud Recesses’ wards again after they have exchanged the proper greetings and pleasantries.

At his side, Sizhui has already guessed what Jingyi is about to say and desperately shakes his head as vigorously as possible without attracting Wei Wuxian’s attention. Nothing escapes Hanguang-jun’s notice, and Lan Wangji briefly glances at Sizhui with amusement, but Sizhui knows Hanguang-jun won’t draw unnecessary attention to him. Shadowing Sizhui, Wen Ning simply smiles wryly, his wide eyes dancing as if there is a joke that only he is privy to. Lan Xichen simply stands there, lips curled into a resigned smile as he watches the scene unfold before him.

“So…?” Wei Wuxian echoes, confused, as he takes Hanguang-jun’s hand and allows Wangji to help him off Lil’ Apple’s back.

Jingyi does not notice how Wangji’s hand remains on Wei Wuxian’s back even after both his feet are planted firmly on the ground. Xichen, however, very much notices and gives Wangji a knowing look that says as such.

Wangji resolutely ignores his brother’s gaze. Instead, he refocuses his attention back onto Wei Wuxian.

“So have you finally confessed your undying love and devotion to each other!” All the advice Zewu-jun had given Jingyi about leaving Wanji and Wei Wuxian to their own devices has flown out the window as Jingyi says this so emphatically that it is no longer even a question.

Confused, Wei Wuxian turns to Wangji first. Jingyi doesn’t see any changes in Hanguang-jun’s expression but he must have reacted as Wei Wuxian nods and turns back to Jingyi.

“Of course we have,” Wei Wuxian says with an oddly anticipatory note to his voice. There is a mischievous glint in his eye. “Hanguang-jun is my husband.”

There is a brief pause as Jingyi processes Wei Wuxian’s words.

“ What?!” Jingyi shrieks. “ Husband?! ”

Somewhere in Cloud Recesses, during a fine afternoon tea with a Lan Sect Elder, Lan Qiren suddenly coughs up blood.

“Well we’ve already been engaged forever,” Wei Wuxian shrugs as if he hasn’t just distorted Jingyi’s entire world. “We didn’t want to wait any longer.”

Off to the side, Wen Ning is completely unsurprised by this revelation having witnessed their union with his own eyes, albeit from inside a bush. Sizhui was never told outright, but Wen Ning had hinted at Wangji and Wei Wuxian’s union just enough that Sizhui had extrapolated his own conclusions.

Jingyi swings around to look at Zewu-jun, the only one who is not betraying him at this moment by being the only other person who is surprised. While Xichen had already determined that Wangji and Wei Wuxian had confessed, Xichen hadn’t expected them to already be married .

“To be fair, I didn’t know we were engaged for most of it either,” Wei Wuxian continues nonchalantly, as if he hasn’t just uprooted Jingyi’s entire world. His hand is clasped tightly in Hanguang-jun’s grasp as Wei Wuxian swings their entwined hands together back and forth between them. “Lan Zhan forgot to tell me.”

“I did not forget,” Lan Wangji hums thoughtfully as he looks at Wei Wuxian with the most adoring, love struck gaze Jingyi has ever seen. With his free hand, Lan Zhan reaches over to cover their entwined hands and relaxes Wei Wuxian’s fervent swinging. “Wei Ying was not ready.”

Wei Wuxian rests his head on Lan Wangji’s shoulder. With an equally infatuated gaze, Wei Wuxian looks up at Hanguang-jun from his shoulder. “But I’m ready now. Lan Zhan, I’m so ready —“

Lan Xichen interrupts before Wei Wuxian’s smitten tone can turn outright salacious.

“Welcome back, Wei- gongzi , Wangji. I offer my blessings and congratulations to you both,” Zewu-jun says mildly, forcing the words out through his own shock. “May I ask when this union took place?”

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian look at each other again. Jingyi can’t decide whether he finds their ability to carry a conversation with only their eyes to be the height of romance or absolutely grating.

“A few minutes after we accidentally got engaged,” Wei Wuxian explains rather unhelpfully. “When he tied his ribbon around my wrist.”

“We completed the first bows before Lan Yi,” Hanguang-jun elaborates. This time, Jingyi notices when Hanguang-jun releases Wei- qianbei ’s hand so he can wrap his arm protectively around Wei- qianbei and pull him in close.

“Lan Yi?” Zewu-jun echoes. Hanguang-jun’s explanation clarified nothing for Jingyi, but Zewu-jun seems to understand. “Wangji, that was over two decades ago.”

“You’ve been married for twenty years!?” Jingyi snaps, no longer even trying to mediate his own surprise. Glancing back to the side, Sizhui and Wen Ning are doing their best to melt into the trees and be idle spectators.

Traitors , Jingyi thinks.

“Not exactly,” Wei Wuxian interrupts Jingyi’s thoughts. He is leaning into Hanguang-jun’s shoulder slightly, subconsciously. In any other circumstance, Jingyi would find this to be exceptionally romantic. “We didn’t get to the second set until after we saved everyone in the Burial Mounds, when we all went to Lotus Pier.”

“It took you twenty years to get married?” Jingyi is blurting out thoughts as they come, the shock of Hanguang-jun’s marriage having finally severed the already tenuous connection between his brain and his mouth.

“Lan Zhan and I like to take it slow,” Wei Wuxian says as if it is perfectly to space out wedding bows over two decades, across two lifetimes, without any ceremony, and without telling anyone.

Xichen speaks again. “When did you complete the final set?”

“Right after we left the Guanyin Temple.”

“But Sizhui and Uncle Wen Ning followed you right after you left,” Jingyi says, trying to map out a timeline.

“We finished our bows before they caught up.”

Wen Ning says nothing. At the time, he had briefly gone ahead to clear the path for Sizhui when he had happened upon and witnessed their bows to each other. No one else knew what he had seen and Wen Ning very much intended to keep it that way. It was a tender and very private moment, and it was fortunate that they returned to the road just as Sizhui caught up with Wen Ning.

“But you were lonely! And all that longing!” Jingyi tries to untangle his mess of thoughts, wondering if he spent too much time reading too much into Sizhui’s letters.

“Of course I was lonely!” Wangji’s grip on Wei Wuxian’s waist tightens. “I missed Lan Zhan! I have to leave my new husband behind!”

“Then why did you even leave?”

Wei Wuxian pauses, thinking about how to put into words how he felt. “I was ready to love Lan Zhan,” Wei- qianbei finally says, voice subdued. “But I wasn’t ready to be me.”

“What does that even mean?”

“You can’t devote yourself to someone fully without knowing who you are without that person,” Wei Wuxian says with uncharacteristic sincerity.

A silence falls upon them. Jingyi still isn’t sure whether this is real, or if he was having the weirdest dream.

No one notices Lil' Apple stealing an apple out of Sizhui’s basket.

“Wangji,” Xichen breaks the silence, “why did you not tell anyone?”

The hurt in his voice is resounding and Jingyi wonders the same thing. All these weeks, Zewu-jun has been quietly supportive of Jingyi’s misplaced attempts to bring Hanguang-jun and Wei- qianbei together, only to find out there was no need for any of it.

“It was...not intentional,” Lan Wangji says slowly, carefully parsing through his words. “Wei Ying and I did not wish to leave our feeling unacknowledged for any longer.”

“You did not even have a proper marriage ceremony,” Xichen says wistfully.

“The ceremony was never important to us, Zewu-jun,” Wei Wuxian answers quietly. “This entire mess happened because of cross-sect politics and interferences. So we wanted something for ourselves, something that couldn't be co-opted for sect politics.”

And despite everything his poor heart has gone through in that single afternoon, Jingyi’s heart melts because of course Hanguang-jun and Wei- qianbei wouldn’t tell anyone. Having each other was more than enough for them and wasn’t that just the pinnacle of love?

“Now, Lan Jingyi,” Wei Wuxian continues, teasing grin back on his face, “I heard you concocted a plan to lure me back into Cloud Recesses.” Jingyi makes an affronted squawk, but doesn’t get a chance to defend himself when Wei Wuxian continues. “Since you’ve already started on digging a pond, you can help me grow a lotus pond! A-Yuan has even been so kind as to bring back lotus seeds from the Burial Mounds. You’ll help me, won’t you Lan Jingyi?”

Jingyi’s head is spinning with all the newly gained information. And A-Yuan? Who is A-Yuan?

Later, Sizhui will sit down and explain his early history with Wei Wuxian as a Wen, and Jingyi will make the connection between Gusu Lan’s Lan Sizhui — Lan Yuan — and Wei Wuxian’s A-Yuan. But at the moment, Jingyi’s mind is swimming in all the newfound revelations.

Without waiting for Jingyi’s response, Wei Wuxian marches off toward the Jingshi. Lan Wangji follows at his side, his arm never letting go of his husband.

“I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon behind the Jingshi, Jingyi!” Wei Wuxian calls back without turning around.

They leave Lil' Apple in Jingyi and Sizhui’s care, trusting that they will lead Lil' Apple to the back mountains to graze on grass with Hanguang-jun’s rabbits.

As he watches the figures of Hanguang-jun and Wei- qianbei disappear into Cloud Recesses, Jingyi genuinely cannot tell whether or not he is being punished. At least they’re finally together, Jingyi thinks, before resolving to never think about them so deeply ever again.

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji’s relationship was simply too complicated for comprehension.

~~~

Some Notes: Jingyi’s weekly teas with Xichen continue anyway because Xichen thinks Jingyi is hilarious and Jingyi...still has plans.

A dan is a wooden pole that you set on your shoulder and is used to carry goods. It’s still used in rural China.

#mdzs #wangxian #lan wangji #wei wuxian #lan jingyi #lan xichen #the untamed #the untamed 陈情令 #My writing

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madpanda75 · 4 years

Text

“Santa Surprise” Part of the Hostage Series

A little holiday story featuring my Barba family for @thefanficfaerie‘s Christmas OTP challenge. There’s domestic fluffiness mixed with a hint of smut. ❤️

Prompt 16: Santa

Slightly NSFW (Santa kink, anyone??)

Rafael finished wiping down the counters after dinner when something odd struck him. It was quiet—too quiet. You offered to host the SVU holiday party and were currently out shopping with Liv, leaving Rafael alone with a five year old and two toddlers. Creeping into the living room where his children were, he expected total chaos, but instead was greeted with a picture perfect moment.

There was Mila sitting in front of the fireplace flanked by her two siblings while she showed them her pop-up book of The Night Before Christmas. “On Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and then he leaves you presents under the tree,” she explained, pointing to the fat, jolly man dressed in red. “But if you’re bad, then you get coal.”

“No one is going to get coal this year,” Rafael said. “Santa just texted me and he said you all have been very good.”

Mila gasped and looked up at her father in awe. “Papi, you know Santa!”

“Of course I do,” he replied and picked up Rory and Ben, kissing them both on the cheek. “Ok, my little reindeer. Bath and bedtime."

Ben giggled and pointed to Rafael. “Santa!”

Rafael shook his head. “No, I’m not Santa. I’m Papi.”

“No, you Santa,” Ben replied.

“Santa!” Rory chimed in, grabbing at her father’s beard.

Rafael let out an exasperated sigh. Ever since he had decided to grow a beard that winter, the twins had taken to calling him Santa. It was beginning to get old. He walked up the stairs, balancing the twins in his arms with Mila following close behind.

“Papi, is Santa going to be at the Christmas party?” Mila asked while Rafael was wrangling Rory and Ben into the bathtub.

“Maybe, but remember muñequita, Santa is very busy this time of year. He may not be able to make it,” Rafael replied. Just then Rory escaped from the bathtub and ran down the hall, screaming and leaving a soapy trail.

“Oh God, we have a runaway. Rory, come back!” Rafael got up and chased after the naked toddler.

Mila grabbed the rubber ducky from the sink and handed it to her little brother. “Looks like someone is getting coal in their stocking,” she said in a sing-song voice, making Ben laugh.

*****

Rafael was utterly exhausted by the time you came home. After getting Rory back in the tub, Ben decided to make a run for it, escaping down the hallway. Once the twins were finally bathed and put to bed, Rafael then had to negotiate bedtime with Mila. He sang. He danced. He read stories. He was beginning to feel like a one man show on Broadway.

Staring at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, Rafael tilted his head from side to side, noticing the grey that streaked his hair and beard before looking down at his soft belly. No wonder the twins kept calling him Santa.

With a sigh, he shut off the bathroom lights and walked into the bedroom where you were waiting. Taking one look at your poor husband, you held out your arms to him. Rafael collapsed onto the bed and into your warm embrace.

“Rough night?” You asked.

“Mmhmm.” He nodded, his head practically buried in your chest.

You softly laughed, having experienced bedtime with Mila and the twins when Rafael was working late. “Thanks for watching them. I really appreciate it. There was no way I could’ve gone shopping with those three running around the store.”

“Anytime,” Rafael replied, his voice muffled against your skin.

You ran your fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp. A groan escaped Rafael’s lips as his body began to relax. He nuzzled against your chest making you giggle and squirm. “Your beard tickles.”

Rafael raised his head and saw the red mark he had made on your sensitive skin. “Sorry,” he sheepishly said.

“Don’t be. I love it,” you purred.

“You do?”

You smirked and stroked his scuff. “You look so sexy with a beard. It drives me crazy.”

Rafael wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Good to know,” he whispered and pushed up your flimsy silk nightgown, exposing more of your bare flesh. He lay open-mouth kisses on your stomach, dragging his tongue across your skin while spreading your thighs with his large hands.

You bit back a moan and tried to focus, knowing that if he kept this up you would forget all about what you had planned to ask him all evening. “So Liv and I were talking,” you abruptly said.

“Uh-oh, never a good sign,” Rafael murmured against you.

“And we were thinking what if you dressed up as Santa for the holiday party?”

Rafael stopped and met your gaze. “Santa? Really? I don’t know,” he groaned. “The squad would never let me live it down. I already dress up for Halloween, now I gotta be Santa too?”

“Everyone would love it! Besides don’t pretend you don’t love dressing up for Halloween every year.” You sat up and playfully narrowed your eyes. “I see how excited you get when we pick our family costumes.”

You had him there. Over the years, Rafael had grown to love Halloween. Being married to you, it was hard not to be. This past Halloween you were characters from Alice in Wonderland. You dressed up as the Red Queen. Rafael was the White Rabbit. Mila was Alice, and Rory and Ben were Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum. It was becoming a sweet family tradition.

“Fine, I’ll think about it,” he said and gently pushed you back down onto the bed before going back to his previous task of leaving a trail of kisses down your body.

“Liv and I found a really nice Santa suit,” you said.

“Mmmhmm,” Rafael mumbled while nibbling on your inner thigh. You gasped and arched your hips towards him.

Rafael was playing dirty, trying to distract you from your mission. But your husband underestimated you. You were determined to get him to play Santa. “The guy at the store is keeping it on hold for us. I have to let him know tomorrow if we’re going to take it,” you continued. “We thought you could dress up and pass out treats to the kids.”

Rafael huffed out a breath. “Mi amor, can we talk about this later. I’m a little preoccupied at the moment,” he said, gesturing to your open legs.

“I just think it would add such a great touch to our party and the kids are so excited for Santa this year. Mila even made him an invitation.” You scrambled out from under Rafael and grabbed Mila’s invitation from the top of the dresser, handing it over to him.

The invitation was a picture Mila had drawn of herself and the twins with Santa. The little five year old even signed her name along with a few scribbles in red and green crayon which he suspected were Rory and Ben’s signatures. The drawing tugged at his heart strings. He felt like the Grinch whose heart grew three sizes. If he could be a Lewis Carroll character for his family, he could certainly be good ol’ Saint Nick.

“You promise it’s not some cheesy polyester suit?” Rafael asked.

“Actually I think it’s a cotton-poly blend. A light breathable fabric.”

Rafael gave you a warning look. “Y/N.”

“I’m just kidding. It’s a nice suit. Way better than any Santa costume you’d find at the mall.”

“Alright,” he conceded and set Mila’s invitation on the nightstand. “I’ll be Santa.”

You squealed with excitement and wrapped your arms around Rafael. “You are the most incredible husband and father. Have I ever told you that?”

“You have, but it doesn’t hurt to say it again,” he teased and planted a searing hot kiss to your lips. “Now that we got all that sorted,” he purred, kissing down the gentle slope of your neck. “May I please—” His mouth moved lower, kissing the swells of your breasts. “Continue what I was doing earlier.” He pulled your nightgown off and kissed a path from your right hip to your left hip.

You softly moaned, your eyes slipping close. “Whatever you say, Santa,” you breathed with a hint of a smile on your lips.

Rafael’s eyes darkened. In an instant, he had you flipped onto your back. “Oh you’re asking for it now, cariño.”

*****

It was the night of the party. Rafael and Sonny stood outside on the front stoop. When you stopped by the store to pick up the Santa outfit, you spied a beautiful lime green and red elf costume. It even came with pointy shoes. You rented the outfit and miraculously had managed to talk Sonny into being an elf. “I still don’t see why you get to be Santa,” he grumbled. “Whoever heard of a 6 foot elf.”

Rafael rolled his eyes. He was beginning to sweat within the red jumpsuit. His face itched and he silently cursed himself for not shaving before placing the fake white beard on top of his real beard. “For the last time, it’s my house and Y/N asked me to be Santa.”

“I’m just sayin’ I’m always Santa at the Carisi house.”

Rafael gave Sonny a dead-pan stare before knocking on the door.

“I got it,” he heard Fin say. Fin opened the door to see Rafael and Sonny dressed in their Christmas regalia and took out his phone to snap a picture. “I got my Christmas gift right here,” he laughed.

Rafael and Sonny walked past a still laughing Fin and into the house. “Hey everyone! Look who’s here,” you announced when you saw your husband and partner.

“Santa!” All the kids exclaimed and ran towards Rafael and Sonny. Rafael smiled and said hello to everyone in his best booming Santa voice. He had to admit seeing the children’s faces light up with joy made it worth dressing up in a ridiculous costume.

“Ok, kids. Santa is going to sit by the Christmas tree. You can each go see him and get a treat from his elf.” You looked back and winked at Rafael and Sonny.

Rafael sat down in a big armchair while the kids lined up. Fin’s grandson, Jaden, was first. He wanted Transformers.

When Noah asked for a puppy. Rafael glanced up to see Liv vehemently shaking her head at her son’s request. “Uhhh….you may need to ask the Easter Bunny for that one,” he told the little boy.

As soon as Amanda place Billie and Jesse on Rafael’s lap, they screamed and cried. Amanda laughed and took a few pictures. “They’ll love these pics when they’re older,” she teased.

It was Mila’s turn after that. With a shy smile, she hopped up on Rafael, then the inquisition started. The little girl was relentless, asking question after question.

“Santa, did you bring Rudolph with you tonight?” She sweetly asked.

Just as Rafael was about to answer Sonny interjected. “He’s back at the North Pole,” he said with a mouthful of cookies. “Santa only takes Rudolph with him when the weather is bad.”

“Oh, ok. What about the fireplace? What do kids do when they don’t have fireplaces. Do you still give them gifts?” Mila looked up at Rafael with big green innocent eyes.

“Well….I…you know fireplaces…” Rafael’s voice trailed off, trying to come up with a plausible answer.

“I know what Santa does. He uses Christmas magic,” Sonny answered before chugging a glass of milk.

“Actually my elves also freelance as chimney contractors,” Rafael replied, not wanting Sonny to outshine him. After all, he was Santa.

Sonny snorted a laugh. “Really, Santa? Chimney contractors.”

Rafael glared at Sonny and flicked a bell dangling from his hat. “Why don’t you go and pass out the candy to the kids.”

“Tough gig,” Sonny mumbled and went to pass out treats.

You watched Mila’s interaction with Rafael and had to bite your lip to keep from laughing. She was definitely her father’s daughter. “Baby, why don’t you tell Santa what you want for Christmas,” you said, deciding to save your husband from Mila’s line of questioning.

When Mila was finished, you brought over the twins. Rory and Ben held hands and warily eyed the man in red. “This must be Rory and Ben.” Rafael picked up the twins and set them on his lap. “What would you two like for Christmas?”

Rory smiled and pointed at him. “Papi!”

“No, Rory. I’m Santa,” Rafael said with a nervous laugh. “Unbelievable,” he thought to himself. The first time in weeks the twins call him Papi and its when he’s in a Santa costume.

Ben shook his head and giggled. “No, you Papi!” The tiny toddler yanked off Rafael’s fake white beard in front of everyone.

There was a collective gasp in the living room. You and Rafael locked eyes. His panic-stricken expression matched your own. “Papi? You’re Santa?!” Mila exclaimed.

All the children began to cry, asking their parents if Santa was real. It was amazing how in the blink of an eye, your party turned into a total disaster.

“Remind me again why we decided to do this?” Rafael shouted to you above the pandemonium.

It took a while, but the adults were finally able to calm everyone down and tell the children that there was indeed a real Santa. With some quick thinking on your part, you explained that Santa and Rafael were friends and Santa sometimes asked Rafael to help out when he couldn’t attend parties due to prior engagements. Rafael agreed, saying it was a little job he had on the side during the holidays.

The older children were a little skeptical of your story, but after bribing them with a few more chocolates and some additional questions from Mila, they seemed to be appeased and the party went off without a hitch.

*****

Later on that evening, you checked on Mila and the twins. They had passed out as soon as the party was over. You walked back to your bedroom, expecting Rafael to be fast asleep only to find him sitting in a chair in your bedroom with a mischievous grin on his face. He was shirtless, wearing only the red pants and suspenders along with the Santa hat, having forgone the fake white beard and red jacket.

A tingle shot straight to your core. You never had a Santa kink...until now. “Santa, what are you still doing in here?”

“Well, I was about to leave, but then I realized I never asked you what you wanted for Christmas,” Rafael said.

“Give me one second.” You held up your finger and ran to your dresser.

Rafael spied a flash of red when you pulled something out of your drawer before you made a beeline to the bathroom. He twiddled his thumbs and whistled a Christmas song while patiently waiting for you.

Just then he heard a crash coming from the bathroom. “Ow, fuck!” You muttered.

“Everything ok in there?”

“Yep,” you called out, slightly out of breath. “Be right out.” A minute later, you opened the door dressed in a sheer red lace baby doll teddy lined with white faux fur and a matching red lace thong.

Rafael audibly gulped, drinking you in from head to toe, all the blood in his body pooling in his groin.

“Well, what do you think.” You blushed and slowly twirled to show off the lingerie before sauntering over to Rafael.

“I love it, he softly groaned and ran his large hands up your thighs and around to your backside, giving your ass a firm squeeze. “Wait, you didn’t get this while out shopping with Liv, did you?”

“No,” you giggled. “I picked this up a while ago. Finally thought of an opportunity to use it.”

Rafael looked up at you, his green eyes half-hooded with lust. “Why don’t you come sit on Santa’s lap,” he purred and patted his knee.

You straddled his lap and ran your fingers through the smattering of hair across his chest, playfully snapping one of his red suspender straps. “I have to tell you, Santa. I’ve been really naughty this year,” you softly said, grinding against his growing erection.

“Well let’s see what we can do about getting you back on the nice list,” Rafael growled, kissing down the slope of your neck. You gasped and dug your nails into his biceps, feeling his scruff scratch against your soft skin. Rafael smirked, nibbling and sucking until a bruise formed right above your clavicle. Inhaling deeply, he could smell the Christmas cookie body spray you had spritzed on earlier. You smelled good enough to eat.

It may have been a crazy chaotic evening, but one thing was for sure—playing Santa certainly had its perks.

@glimmerglittergirl @southern-magnolia @sweetcannolicarisi @delia26 @obfuscateyummy @sass-and-suspenders @eclecticminded @thatesqcrush @katmstanton @amirightcounsellor @beltzboys2015-blog @letty-o @sonnysdoll @lyssa1385 @sweetsummertime99 @burningsorr0ws @gibbs274 @izzythefanfreak @riodallas @babypink224221 @livxrafa @esparza-army @obsessionprofessional @ottosuricato @melsquared79 @dreila03 @frenchiefoxy @tropes-and-tales @thecraziestcrayon @goodluckfindingone

#rafael barba #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba x reader #barba #barba fic #barba imagine #Rafael Barba x Reader x Mila #Mila Barba #aurora barba #benjamin barba #hostage series #law and order svu fic #barba fanfic #law and order svu imagine #christmas otp challenge #Christmas with the Barbas

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onyx-void · 3 years

Note

Answer 1 through 50

Okay. You called my bluff. (ok not really a bluff, tbh, thank you I appreciate you) Unfortunately, we're having an internet outage where I live, so this is gonna take a while. Also, I have to do this on the webpage, on my phone, cause otherwise I can't have an 'under the cut.'

1. Do you have a crush on anyone?

I suppose you could call it a crush. That's one layer to how I feel. Like an onion :p

2. What's your favorite candy?

Ferror Roche, or however you spell it, Unless it's a holiday, then I Love those chocolate covered marshmallow treats.

3. Favorite love song?

I don't really listen to music much, tbh, love songs included. The first one to come to mind is "Love Story" by Taylor Swift. My favorite when I actually think about it has to be "You Are My Sunshine" by Johnny Cash.

4. What was your first kiss like?

My first kiss. I had my first kiss last year, actually, at the same age I am now, 22. That was my first date, too, such as it was during a pandemic. I hadn't -still haven't, I guess- had many 'first's.' It was awkward, but nice. Chaste, to start.

5. What was your last kiss like?

My last kiss, was a goodbye.

6. Sexual/romantic orientation?

I'm reasonably sure I'm straight, heteroromantic. I've questioned all my orientations several times over the years, but nothing seems to fit as well as that does.

7. Do you prefer poems or love letters?

I would be over the moon to get either. I've written a few poems, though they weren't For anyone. I would prefer love letters, though. Poems can wax and wain to the individuals interpretation, but love letters can declare for all to see.

8. Favorite fanfic trope?

God, I'm Super self-indulgent with my fanfic. I love Mary Sue's, fix-it, time travel, amnesia, self-insert. I want everything to be okay, and for the main character to be able to have at least some idea of what challenges they'll face.

9. Have you ever been in love?

Have been, still am.

10. Favorite milkshake flavor?

Strawberry. Also favorite ice cream flavor. Chocolate's fine, but strawberry Hagen Daaz is The Best. (tbh it's also a sorta reference to my fav character/anime, Ryougi Shiki from Kara no Kyoukai. It's also just damn good ice cream tho

11. Dinner dates or Brunch dates?

Dinner dates could be a great end to the day, but brunch date leaves the possibility for a full day together to look forward to, so I'll go with that.

12. Favorite flowers?

Sunflowers. Though lilacs are nice too.

13. Favorite perfume/cologne?

I've used a vanilla sugar scent in the past? Don't use or have others use it enough to have a favorite.

14. Favorite candle scent?

I got a pack of incense a while back, a dozen different scents. I think my favorite is called Celestial. It's smells like... lavender and petrichor and stardust, I suppose.

15. What's your ideal first date?

Ideal, so everything's perfect. Hiking in the woods, a mountainous area, lots of ups and downs and winding paths and beautiful colors and views. We come to a clearing, and a picnic I've prearranged is already set up next to a glittering lake. We sit, and eat, and talk.

16. What's your favorite love story?

Just the other day, I was finally able to watch The Princess Bride. I absolutely loved it.

17. What's the most attractive thing a person could wear?

Easy. One of my shirts, and that's all that's visible. Could they be wearing something underneath it? Maybe. But you can't be sure, unless they show you one way or another It's a sort of, are they aren't they thing. That said, it works for just about anything where you can't tell if they're wearing short shorts or something, but it works best if it's something more casual than a dress, like a oversized hoodie or shirt.

18. Chocolate, vanilla, or red velvet?

Chocolate. Vanillas alright, red velvets gross.

19. Snow, rain, or sun?

God, we just got snow here that Actually Lasted All Day. That's a miracle tbh. I absolutely love it.

20. Sweetest romantic memory?

We were swinging at the local park, just talking. And I looked over, and the sun was shining through the trees onto the face of an angel. I could have spent eternity in that moment.

21. Favorite dating sim? (And favorite character?)

The only dating sims I know are yandere dating sim, and hautiful boyfriend. Favorite character in general is Ryougi Shiki

22. Fictional crushes?

...Ryougi Shiki...

23. What's your dream wedding like?

It's a small affair, outside, in our backyard on our plant of land, amongst the orchards and vegetable gardens. There's a living arch made of roses I've been growing in secret in preparation, and the bride's bouquet is made from cuttings we took on the spot. The sun is shining, everyone's full of joy, and our love is sure.

24. What makes you blush?

Sincere expressions of love, or even just Being Known. If you say you care for me I Will Melt and that is a Threat.

25. Do you believe in love at first sight?

I have to. I can't disregard my own experiences. That said, it's important to say that love is also something you work towards, together, day in and day out. It's not always hard work, it might not even seem like work, but it's an active thing.

26. Do you believe in soulmates?

I think there are several people you can meet over the course of your life you can call a soulmate.

27. Denim jackets, leather jackets, or bomber jackets?

Leather jackets cause I live in Texas. Otherwise, bomber jackets.

28. What's your sign?

Taurus. Lmk if you want my complete chart from that star app.

29. Are you single?

Unfortunately.

30. Do you prefer to charm, or be charmed?

I think I'm quite charming, I'd definitely say I'm in touch with people, though my execution probably leaves something to be desired. That said, I Love to be charmed. Tell me you like me, tell me I'm wanted. Hell yeah.

31. Guitar or piano?

Piano. Love the classics. I was actually looking at how much pan flutes cost just the other day.

32. Favorite romcom? (Or any romantic movie?)

Once again going with The Princess Bride here.

33. Do you fall in love easily?

Far too easily, I'm afraid. Show your interest in me, and you'll catch mine in you. Doesn't happen very often, though. And if it's just something like a dating profile, I'm far pickier.

34. Valentine's decorations, yay or nay?

If it's something personal, absolutely. As long as it has meaning, it's worth it. Even if the holiday itself is just to sell cards.

35. Would you like to propose, or be proposed to? What's your dream proposal?

I would propose, after it's been made mutually clear and discussed we're both up for it. As a kid I dreamed about proposing on one of those boat rides under Niagara Falls. Now, I think it'd be during a hike, on an overlooking cliff, basically like my ideal first date, actually. That, or somewhere personal to the two of us.

36. Cloud gazing or star gazing?

Star gazing, definitely. Out under the stars, looking up and sneaking glances at each other. Telling stories and making up constellations. What's not to love?

37. Do you like to dance?

Oooh, no. I've never danced, not really the social dancing type. Never really took the opportunity too.

38. What's your OTP?

....Ryougi Shiki and Mikiya Kokuto

39. Kittens or puppies?

You're gonna make me CHOOSE?! ...puppies, because they're more lively and willing to interact with me, generally speaking.

40. Coffee, hot chocolate, or tea?

Hot chocolate. Never got into coffee, I want to like hot tea, but eh. Iced tea is good tho y'all.

41. Favorite soda?

God as a kid I Devoured grape Crush soda. Like. 24 cans a week. Mainly drink juice nowadays. Or choccy milk

42. Do you prefer gazing wistfully out the window or lying dramatically on the sofa?

Window, definitely. Light as well have a view if I've gotta be dramatic, right?

43. Favorite ABBA song?

"Take a Chance on Me" followed shortly by "Dancing Queen"

44. Fuck/Marry/Kill?

You didn't name anyone, so... Fuck Lauren German (I've been watching Lucifer) Marry the one I love, and kill, idk, Trump?

45. Favorite pajamas?

For myself? They're fleece, I think. Usually I just sleep in my boxers tho. For my theoretical partner? How about my boxers ;)

46. Favorite liquor?

I've never had any alcohol, and I don't really intend to.

47. Do you think about love alot?

Every day. It's what drives me.

48. A walk in the park or a walk on the beach?

Walk in the park. More cover ;)

49. Hand kisses or nose kisses?

How about a hand kiss going up the arm, slowly, sensually, all the way up the arm, to the shoulder, taking a stop on the side of the neck, and right before it gets to the lips... Nose kisses.

50. What's your dreamhouse?

It's in a mountainous area. On at least 5 acres. Plenty of woods with trails in them, bordering a national park. On my land, there's an orchard of fruit trees, and greenhouses with herbs and vegetables. The house itself is actually japanese inspired. There's an outdoor garden you can access after coming through the entrance. The bedroom door is a sliding one, through a shortened circular opening. The whole thing gives off a cozy feeling. The love of my life has made their presence known in every room of the house.

#ask me stuff #ask me more questions ill tell you no lies #geez that took forever #thank you tho #i actuslly do appreciate it #i like being wanted #even if its just an anon wanting to know more about me #or even if you really Were just calling my buff #bluff #feel free to message me btw #anon #or anyone else #if you want clarification #or if you want to actually name someone for the FMK

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levi-inthesun · 4 years

Text

Two Can Play At That Game, Part 2

A/N: OKAY HERE IS PART 2! There will be at least one more part, and I apologize in advanced for 2 reasons: 1. I had a nerve ablation done on my cervical spine (c 3-5) and am in pain and 2. this is the closest thing to smut I have even written. (Oh, and 3 bc I BaRlEy edited this).. Last, the Ace of Diamonds is the reader’s super-spy name (that I came up with as a last-ditch effort, sue me)

Warnings: SexuAL TENSION, swearing, some angst.bc I’m a hoe for confronting difficult emotions.

Panic began to build in your chest, at least you were pretty sure that’s what it was., you couldn’t breathe and normally you only felt that when you were panicking and right now, you couldn’t breathe.

“Uh,” you started, words not coming, “I uh, I’m sorry Bucky, I only see you as a friend.”

Bucky watched your mouth open and close like a fish out of water for a second before smiling, He leaned in close so that is lips were practically touching your ear. “And who says friends can’t fuck? You can’t deny the tension here.”

You could feel a coil begin to tighten in your stomach and you were suddenly aware that you couldn’t breathe for a completely different reason. Then Bucky pushed off the wall and walked away.

“Anyways, I’ll see ya later!”

It took a second for your breathing to get back to normal, but when it did you yelled down the hall after him, “I did not like that! Not one bit! I dare you to try that shit on me again, Barnes!”

The only sound you were met with was laughter.

You slammed the door to your room and locked it behind you.

“Aaaahh!” you screamed into your hands. “What the actual hell. I am so not equipped for this.”

Ignoring the tension you felt in your body you plopped down on your bed and grabbed your laptop, opening up tumblr. Front and center was an update by theactualfalcon.

Hello, my falconettes, I am writing this post just in case I am murdered by my friends, our number one OTP, the Ace of Diamonds and the Winter Soldier. They came across my blog and read yours and my favorite story I wrote, Star Crossed Lovers and I walked in just as she read out the name of my blog. Unfortunately, my face was too telling and they automatically knew it was me. No matter my fate, please understand that I regret nothing. Although, I think I underestimated their power together; they’re too strong, too powerful and I hope and pray to any god who is listening (except Thor or Loki) that they only stay a ship in our dreams.

Yours,

Sam Wilson, the actual Falcon.

You had to cover your face with a pillow to stop you from screaming and laughing too loud. Sam had been serious! He actually wanted you and old man Barnes to bang, at least, he used to. That is when the plan began to form and you send a quick text from your phone. After that, you hopped off your bed and booked it to your large closet and tore open the doors. After rifling through your belongings you found what you were looking for and changed your clothes.

You were working on your hair when you heard your phone ping.

Pepper: I’ll spread the word, is there a reason we should all avoid the compound?

You: Yes. Sam has a tumblr and is apparently the number 1 fan of Barnes and I getting together, at least he was until this morning. I am going to get back at him by making him think we ARE getting together. Figured I would spare everyone else.

Pepper: You’ve got to be kidding me. Of course, it’s for a prank. However, thank you for sparing us. I don’t think the team would survive.

Pepper: Just… don’t catch any actual feelings unless you’re ready for the consequences.

You: Yeah, yeah. Are we still down for a girl's night next weekend?

At that, you put your phone back down and finished getting ready before standing up and smoothing the slinky nightdress over your form.

“Check fucking mate, Banky Burnes.”

Using your skills as a spy, you creep through the hallways of the compound until you found yourself in the empty living room. Quickly, you light the fireplace and pull out the numerous candles you had on hand in essentially every room of the compound you had access too- and you had access to just about every room, even the ones you didn’t have a key too. Once the last one was lit, you quietly asked FRIDAY to play the playlist you had created (named *Seduce Barnes, Fool Wilson*) and skillfully lay your body across the very appropriately placed chaise lounge, which you were incredibly glad you had talked Tony, the drama queen into purchasing.

Just on cue, you heard Bucky clunking through the compound hallways towards you.

“Hey, is everything alright, I smell-” Bucky halted at the entrance to the living room, eyes wide. You could tell he wasn’t sure if he should be concerned with the sheer amount of fire in the room or keep his eyes on your form.

“Hello, James,” you called out to him, voice low.

“H-hey,” Bucky swallowed, pulling his collar away from his neck. “A-are you sure this is safe?”

You smiled slowly, looking up at him from below your lashes, “The fire? Or the spark between us?”

You could have sworn you saw Bucky mouth the words ‘fuck yes’ to himself, but you weren’t positive because the moment he began to step in your direction you began to question your own sanity. Sure, you had seduced hundreds of men for missions and just for the fun of it, of course. And yes, every single time you managed to get them in whatever position you needed them to be in to extract pertinent information or simply to bang someone because you were bored, but that's besides the point. The point was, you were always successful and this was BANKY BURNES FOR FUCKS SAke.

Now, Bucky was standing over you not sure what to do with himself and your face did not even twitch from the mental emotional turmoil you had just gone through.

“So, Barnes,” you purred. “You gonna come down here, or am I gonna have to climb you like the tree you are?”

Internally, you were wheezing at the line you had just used… did you really call BANKY BURNES A TREE?

Bucky didn’t move, so you moved into a kneeling position and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. “Sam will be here in precisely a minute and a half and if you do not kiss me like you mean to have me, we cannot get back at him like I’ve been planning all damn afternoon,” you tugged harshly on his shirt so he was now nose to nose with you. “Are you in or out?”

You saw all of heaven and hell pass through Bucky’s face as he grit his teeth, “You got me horny to get back at Sam, what the fuck?”

“And you, for earlier, not fun, huh?” You did your best to smile mischievously but you weren’t really sure how well that turned out.

Bucky huffed, “Shit, he’s coming. Yeah, I’m in.”

The second his soft, plump lips made contact with yours, you knew you were maybe fucked.

At first, you simply relaxed into the kiss, although not a part of your elaborate plan. In your head though, you were counting out the seconds before Sam walked through the door.

Then Bucky’s entirely too large hands firmly grabbed your hips, spurring your forwards. You hooked your leg over his hip before flipping him over. Now that he was lying on the dramatic chaise lounge, you planted your knees on either side of his strong hips and attached your lips to the spot just below his jaw and ear and threaded your fingers in his too soft hair, tugging a little too roughly.

And just as Sam walked through the door, Bucky growled in your ear and that dumb coil in your stomach began to grow tighter and this was becoming too real but you couldn’t didn’t want to stop yourself.

Bucky managed to rotate positions so that you were on your back and he was hovering above you, you head hanging over the end of the lounge, ever so slightly, Bucky began to suck wet kisses on your neck and chest as his hands gripped your hips, rucking your nightgown up ever so slightly and you had the perfect view of Sam standing in the middle of the open kitchen, too many bags of groceries falling out of his hands, eyes, and mouth open wide.

“Bucky,” you purred, “We have company.”

Unfortunately Bucky stopped his ministrations and looked up.

“WHaT THE ActuAL FUCK,” Sam began yelling. “I diD NOT WANT THIS TO HAPPEN!”

Sam began pacing furiously, mumbling to himself, then stopped suddenly pointing at the two of you who haven’t moved a single inch except for Bucky’s stupid metal right hand which had moved approximately 2 inches up, further moving your nightgown, but you weren’t focusing on that, no that was simply the spy in you paying attention.

“YOU SET THIS UP!” He finally yelled, an ‘aha’ in his voice. “This isn’t real,” he stated matter of factly, then picked up his groceries and began putting them away.

You rolled your eyes and pushed the massive man away from you and began blowing out candles, forcing tears to your eyes.

“Sam Wilson,” you said, voice watery, “You ruined a perfect night.”

Then you ran off towards your room, slowing once you were out of sight.

You heard Bucky huff with annoyance once the last candle was out, “You had to make my girl upset?” he ground out before following you.

By the time Bucky made his way to you, you were leaning up against his door, pouting (for effect, and just in case redwing followed).

By the look in your eyes, Bucky knew redwing was peeking around the corner.

“‘M sorry baby,” he said softly, running a finger down your cheek, tracing your jaw. “I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

You allowed a small smile to form on your lips and suddenly felt very warm in the pit of your stomach, “Oh? How so?”

“Well,” he started, settling one of his thick legs between yours while running his stupid metal hand down your left arm, “How about we head into my room and you can find out?”

You willed you fucking head to nod and felt Bucky’s arm wrap around your waist just as he opened the door.

Once the door to his room was closed, however, and to your surprise, Bucky had you pinned to the wall,

“Please let me fucking kiss you,” Bucky growled.

“Do it,” you replied, voice hushed.

Bucky’s lips were not at all the same against yours as they were when you were in the living room. Compared to this, that was practiced and calculated. This was searing. The way his hot lips burned across your was made your heart constrict you and your toes curl and you kissed back with equal force.

You tore your hands from where they were gripping his shoulders to push at his abdomen with enough strength that he knew to move (you knew from enough missions and training sessions that that man wouldn’t move if he didn’t need to). Bucky let you push him back towards his bed but turned before the backs of his legs made contact and instead picked you up and chucked you onto it unceremoniously.

“You,” he started, voice husky, “are going to be,” he said as he climbed onto the bed and pulled on your leg so that you met him halfway, “the fucking death of me.”

From the ferocity in this voice and intensity of his eyes, you expected this kiss to be as the last one, hot and burning. Instead, it was gentle, almost, dare you say loving as his stupid long fingers brushed against your cheek and his body settled over yours, tongues exploring.

“You’ve been really closed off since, well,” Bucky paused, brushing some hair behind your ear, “Since Steve left. And I know you don’t like talking about that, I just wanted you to know that I noticed. That Sam and I noticed.”

“Uh-uh,” you shake your head, “We aren’t talking about him.”

“I know, and I mentioned that I know that,” Bucky’s brow was arched quizzically.

“No,” you laughed, “I mean Sam.”

Bucky relaxed back into the bed and rolled his eyes, turning back to you, giving you space to talk about Steve if you wanted.

“You,” you started, poking at Bucky’s ridiculously toned chest, “You didn’t see Steve and I before he left. He was like, well, the brother I always wished I had and I thought it had been the same for him. He was open with me about his past, about Peggy, about you, but he seemed, I dunno, “ you shrugged,”like he knew it was all in the past. I mean, with Peggy at least.”

Bucky nodded and interlaced his fingers with yours.

“I just wish he had told me,” you admitted. “I don’t think I would have been- well, no I still am, incredibly angry with him, I don’t think I would have been had he even discussed the possibility with me, even if he hadn’t come to any conclusion until he was on the platform. I would have been okay.” You felt a tear betray you and slip down your cheek, but at this point, you were well past caring. “I just-” you hiccupped, “I just wish he’d have talked to me.”

Bucky pulled you into his bare chest and wrapped his arms around you. It was in that perfect balance of warmth and weight that you finally cried, six months later.

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boneless-loafcat · 4 years

Text

100 Reasons To Live:

1. you have to pet every cat and dog

2. go road-tripping with no destination in mind

3. new music, movies, and tv shows

4. new OCs and ideas

5. Oreos

6. back scratches

7. ghost hunting

8. hugs

9. singing loud and off key

10. dancing like no ones watching

11. baking and cooking with someone

12. learning something new

13. gushing over a ship/OTP

14. new fanart/fanfictions

15. new seasons of your favorite shows

16. card and board games

17. feeling the sun on your face when you’re laying in the grass

18. that first swim of the summer

19. the first snow of the winter

20. the smell of autumn and spices

21. halloween

22. sweaters and hoodies

23. holding hands

24. traveling the world with someone

25. butterscotch candies

26. writing letters

27. buying too many candles at the store

28. waking up before someone and playing with their hair

29. setting off fireworks in the summer

30. the sound of crickets or a fire crackling

31. small loving touches

32. little amused side glances at someone when you share an inside joke

33. stuffed animals

34. playing an instrument

35. growing your own plants

36. you haven’t met aliens yet

37. taking naps with someone

38. cows and bees

39. decorating your own house/apartment

40. eating cookie dough at 2am because no one can stop you

41. wearing that one outfit you’ve always wanted to wear

42. doing something outside your comfort zone

43. movie nights with friends

44. Minecraft updates

45. you need to ride a camel

46. you need to finish your shampoo and conditioner at the same time

47. dancing in the rain and jumping in puddles

48. sharing secrets with someone

49. learning how to properly fold a fitted sheet

50. getting that tattoo and piercing you’ve always wanted

51. finding sea glass at the beach

52. forehead kisses

53. figuring out what the perfect amount of pasta is to cook for one person

54. making too much pasta for one person

55. growing out your hair out or buzzing it all off

56. going partying with friends

57. memorizing all the lyrics to a song you like

58. finishing a chapstick without loosing it

59. going kayaking

60. going on milkshake/slushee dates

61. renting a beach house or a cabin with all of your friends for vacation

62. going hiking

63. going on a picnic

64. drinking coffee in the shower

65. getting scared by the toaster

66. telling your friends puns because you know they secretly find them funny

67. learning to balance at least 5 books on your head

68. sitting on the beach in November listening to the waves

69. going strawberry, apple, peach, and cherry picking

70. picking out a tree for the holidays and decorating it

71. bubble baths

72. visiting fun museums

73. bubble tea and ramen

74. rereading your favorite book series

75. coloring Easter eggs

76. buying stupid snacks from the vending machines

77. new memes

78. waking up and making breakfast with someone

79. being a complete cursed gremlin being and terrorizing your friends

80. riding roller coasters

81. learning to knit your own scarf

82. buying a bunch of pins

83. going to cons/cosplaying with someone

84. coffee

85. wandering the mall and window shopping

86. treating yourself and self care days

87. figuring out that math problem

88. beating your older parent friends at scrabble

89. falling asleep next to someone

90. stargazing

91. going fishing

92. you have to figure out how to use that one machine at the gym you never could understand

93. going to a fair and kissing someone at the top of the Ferris wheel

94. flying kites

95. going to a festival

96. roller-blading and ice skating

97. filling a photo album with pictures

98. having someone hold you when you cry

99. diving for pennies in the deep end of the pool

100. growing old with someone that means a lot to you

#self love #self care #reminder #positivity #love yourself #love your body #love who you are #body confidence

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jujywrites · 4 years

Text

Howl

Dick-or-Treat/Lower Your Standards, part 5~

My first YoI fic, oh god...So! I swear Victuri is my OTP but what can I say, I also got hooked on a rarepolyship (this is very Not Unusual for me). This started as one of two plotbunnies for a "bad"/idfic YoI big bang a few years ago that I dropped out of, both featuring the eventual OT3 of Victor/Yuri. K/Yuko.

This is a no-skating ABO AU; I've never written ABO or YoI. It's also an extension of the fade-to-black (and/or saved for later~) smut scene between Alpha Yuko and Omega Victor that opens the fic (Yuri K. is a Beta :D). I'm gonna finish it. *puts up flame shield*

AO3

FF.net

or keep reading

***

It was 4AM, and Yuko stared up at the bedroom ceiling wide awake. Light from the half-moon shone through tree branches, through the not-quite-closed curtains from the window at the head of the bed. Strange shapes bloomed on that ceiling, and Yuko had been watching them for far too long.

She shifted, moving her gaze to a less discomfiting sight: the man asleep beside her, moonlight gathering in his silvery hair and giving it an unearthly glow. His breath was peaceful, face soft. She slid closer to him, resting her forehead against his shoulder. Then an arm across his chest. He sighed in his sleep, and a moment later she felt a hand gently take hers. His touch both calmed and stirred something in her, and for the umpteenth time she marveled at her present situation. How could he sleep so soundly?

Need was growing in her chest as she lay nestled up to him. A deep breath in hopes of soothing oxygen only made it worse, because it carried his scent. The events of the past few days began to rattle around her brain again. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to ignore the memories and the rising panic and the infernal heat in her belly.

"Please, please stop," she whispered, like saying it aloud would make any difference. But the pressure in her head kept building. Her limbs had begun to itch restlessly.

And Victor wouldn't let go of her hand.

With the last scrap of her control, she straddled him quickly and kissed him awake.

Even in half-sleep he arched to meet her, and when he opened his eyes sapphire blue had already turned stormy with lust.

"I'm sorry." She was panting now, tunnel vision descending as she pressed mouth and tongue to his shoulder and across his chest.

"Yuko." His hands encircled her wrists and she froze, looking up at him. "Breathe, Котёнок. And never apologize for your nature." He leaned up and placed a kiss to her jaw. "I'm all yours. Please… claim me."

Those words unlocked everything she'd been trying to hold back. She groaned, scraped her teeth across his skin. "If you don't mean that...!"

His hands released her wrists and he shifted in such a way that she could feel his erection. "Then I wouldn't say it. I do, I want you to make me yours."

The need in his voice was light years removed from the calm comforting reason he'd given her over the last few days. Even if he hadn't taken suppressants, surely the mark on his neck would only glow if he really...

Instinct took over. Clutching his torso, she leaned down and bit the mark.

The cry he gave reverberated through her whole body, making her thighs slick. He tasted like rain, like something icy sweet, and under it all was the Omega scent she'd ignored for so long.

"Yuko, please fuck me, take me, I can't-"

She sat up, trembling, and planted her feet on either side of his legs. His cock was long, hot when she stroked it. She mounted him easily; a distant part of her marveled at the guttural noise that tore from her chest.

"You're perfect..." Her head dropped back, eyes falling shut, as she stilled, still trembling. Wet dripped from her even with him inside, a deluge she had no power to stop. She ground down onto him, tasting the air as it filled with his whine. "Absolutely perfect." Her mark felt so hot it was nearly burning, but she couldn't make herself move. Victor was everywhere, everything.

"Прекрасный," he was saying like a mantra, gasps mixed with her name. One hand was reaching for her, toward her ribcage and the burning glow.

She caught it, digging her fingernails in. "What?"

"Beautiful." He inhaled deeply, swallowed (inside her he throbbed). His hand went slack in hers, but the tension in his arm was obvious. "May I touch it? Your mark... it's calling to me." He licked his lips, staring unwavering, with eyes full of desire.

How could she want and not want him to at the same time? "Yes," she finally said, the word nearly all air, and let his hand go.

She watched with held breath as his hand moved closer. Three fingertips touched her skin, and-

Her mind blanked. When she was aware again Victor was breathing hard underneath her, pupils wide.

"My god," he said. "Amazing."

He laid his palm to her mark and she keened, sensation overwhelming; she was jolted into movement, hunching down toward him and letting her hips do the work. "Victor!" She nearly sobbed. One hand over his, the other grasping his shoulder, and she still was barely grounded.

"Yes, yes, please!"

Somehow she lay atop him; somehow she kept riding through the tsunami of pleasure. She put her teeth to his mark again, and she tasted blood this time, and Victor turned her name into an ecstatic scream.

She felt him fill her up, felt the convulsions that were the only sign of her orgasm against the unimaginable pleasure. "Mine," she gasped into his neck. "All mine..."

His hand left her mark to join the other on her hips, holding her to him as though it were even possible for them to separate. His cock was soft inside her now, but still throbbing gently from her greedy clenching.

It seemed endless, her body on autopilot, the noise of her thrusts made obscene from the amount of wet. When he grew hard in her again she moaned out weakly, throat raw and chest aching, and she kissed him when he came the second time, drinking in his moans and sucking on his tongue.

The instant the waves of pleasure began to subside, she went utterly limp against him. Her mind went blank once more.

Then she gasped awake, soothed instantly by the circles Victor was making on her back. "How long?" she said, hoarsely.

"Just a few minutes."

His eyes looked past her, and Yuko turned her head to see the lilac of early morning sunlight on the wall.

He chuckled, breathlessly. "Everything else has been... longer, of course."

The slickness had begun to dry. She shifted cautiously, and he mirrored her shiver.

"We might," she began, "be able to-"

"Don't."

Startled, she stared at him.

"Even if you can..." He raised a hand to stroke her cheek. "Could you wait, just a little? I want to stay like this for a while."

Those eyes... She couldn't possibly say no.

She settled against him again. There was so much she wanted to say, she couldn't speak.

"Ah, there, дорогой. Thank you..." His tightened his hold around her, sighing deeply.

Laying a kiss to his collarbone, she allowed sleep to claim her.

#JujYwrites #Yuri on Ice #spice #YoI

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ewa-jednak-chce-spac · 4 years

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@marie22blog - answering your ask :) :

Ringwraiths

favorite thing about them: they look awesome and their awesomeness doesn’t stop on their appearance

least favorite thing about them: the fact that we know almost nothing about their past

favorite line: does their scream count? :D

brOTP: Mouth of Sauron

OTP: their hypothetical wives (+ Eowyn for the Witch-king)

nOTP: Sauron

random headcanon: their backstories created for Games Workshop models https://lotr.fandom.com/wiki/Nazg%C3%BBl#Games_Workshop_models

unpopular opinion: none I guess?

song i associate with them: Where Will You Go by Evanescence - because long time ago I really liked a fanvid about them featuring this song

favorite picture of them:

movie!Thorin

favorite thing about them: his voice ;)

least favorite thing about them: his death :(

favorite line: "Farewell, Master Burglar. Go back to your books... and your armchair... plant your trees, watch them grow. If more people... valued home above gold... this world would be a merrier... place... "

brOTP: Bilbo :)

OTP: Thranduil :)

nOTP: Fili and Kili

random headcanon: none

unpopular opinion: B/agginshield is overrated

song i associate with them: Otwórz oczy by B.E.T.H.

favorite picture of them:

#Tumblr Games #tolkien #nazgul #witch king of angmar #thorin

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queeenpersephone · 6 years

Note

lord of the rings / the hobbit ?

maddy hi!! how are you!?

the first character i ever fell in love with: aragorn. no lie he was my first crush ever

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not: thranduil

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: aragorn/arwen (maybe with more backstory i’d like it?)

my ultimate favorite character™: BILBO BAGGINS. OR ARAGORN. OR GANDALF.

prettiest character: legolas. thorin for the hottest.

my most hated character: denethor? saruman? those two.

my OTP: BAGGINSHIELD like hot damn. plant your trees. watch them grow.

my NOTP: eowyn/aragorn

favorite episode movie: return of the king

saddest death: thorin :(

favorite season:

least favorite season:

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: idk??

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: thorin during botfa

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: bilbo and frodo

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: none?? all my ships are pretty pure from lotr. maybe galadriel/gandalf, bc i don’t want it requited just as it is

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: eowyn/faramir is super cute

send me a fandom!

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dying-tragedy-blog · 7 years

Text

Modern au six of crows

Just some hcs about the dregs gang in modern times I guess

Kaz Brekker -black coffee -lock pick -honestly like the rest of them will Come in and he’ll already be inside -I’ve been waiting for you -magician -pick pockets his “allies” all the time -gloves? Yes -has a slight fear of touch -it used to be really bad but he’s Overcoming it -cane? Yes -he fell out of a tree when he was little and broke his leg so he uses his cane -plus It’s fun to hit people with - has the dregs tattoo because he loves crows and he’s an extra little shit who’s an edgelord -he’s in fights like all the time -they don’t call him dirtyhands for Nothing -so smart -has social media but only posts cryptic aesthetic shots or out of context remarks -uses his talent for evil mostly -his teachers still love him tho???? -very fascinated in psychology -and business - b o o k s -mostly crime but he’s such a closet Nerd. -you can pry Harry Potter from his Cold dead hands -hacker -loves the stars -and the moon -and Inej -has to put up with the constant -points to random crow -kaz it’s u -actually the originator of #getbrekked -will never admit it -all started when Jesper pranked him -covered every inch of his room with post stick notes. It blew up on YouTube -well the is kaz Fucking brekker -was he going to stand for that -no. -so he sets up his own YouTube account -films his first video -his revenge -he tinfoils all of jespers room. Even the socks. -the video blows up he gets tons of subscribers and his revenge -but most important from this one comment. From one account that has never been active since the tag -#getbrekked -was born. Inej Ghafa -ultimate secret keeper -knows everything tbh -the one who can just turn up out of nowhere?? -where did you come from -this place called outside -instagram queen -it’s usually loads of aesthetic shots and sunrises but every now and again there’ll be a video of her shouting parkour and chasing after a squirrel -loves to dance -jackets -hats -earrings -the best at hide and seek -only uses Snapchat for blackmail -Kaz?? Sleeping??? S n a p -keeps a photo book you can fite me on this -poems -cats -her parents took her to the circus when she was little and she fell in love with the tightrope and the acrobats -so she became great at it -really good -sometimes she does it to scare kaz -he pretends it doesn’t work but sometimes he’s so freaked out Like how are you bending your body like that??? Wtf???? -doesn’t swear -the original fricketyfrack -interested in culture history language and photography -aspiring poet -social justice - plans to start a movement when she’s old enough -tea over coffee -marshmallows

Nina Zenik -one word: queen - her and Matthias are everyone’s otp - social justice in high heels - every social media - YouTube? You bet ya - fashion hauls make up tutorials and The ever growing list of videos Featuring Matthias - likes indie music would die for Ed Sheeran - really interested in languages and fashion - she wants amazing designs to stay the same in plus sized clothes -high heels - cannot cook - at all - blew up a microwave trying to Warm up leftovers - hot chocolate and blankets - binge watching tv -somehow knows everyone??? - hey Nina - hey zoya - who’s she - oh just somebody - smart but will never revise - why revise when I can eat - grades Nina - waffles matty - red - once tried to start a band - can speak three languages Jesper Fahey - ADHD? I’m gonna say ADHD - danced but doesn’t do it seriously - mostly does it to embarrass Wylan - Jesper please - what? My hips don’t like wy - listens to shakira - huge gamer - debates - politics - he’s smart but he never tries. Prefers to argue about homework then do it - finger guns - with sound affects - 80s music - and you better believe that he once entered the classroom singing all star - constantly flirting with Wylan - freakishly good aim - hey kaz, do you bet I can throw this pencil in ninas bun from here - do it - worst and best taste in fashion simultaneously - one day it’s great. Shorts and t shirts, hats and then the next it’s lime green checkered pants. - red cowboy boots - farmer sayings - loves it when Kaz gets them - p r a n k s t e r - youtube Chanel is literally just pranks but he has so many subscribers - always puts things on the highest shelf Wylan van Eck - Wylan van sunshine or Wylan van rekt there’s no In between. - usually quite sweet and innocent but every one Knows he’s anything but. Eveynow and again these comments just slip out like - yeah that’s not the only thing Kaz wishes he could be doing - r u n - was bullied pretty bad for his dyslexia but now he just doesn’t really care??? - I’ll just draw my bullied drowning - a r t I s t - his art teacher adores him - only has tumblr to post his art work - really big on tumblr - dog person - massive nerd - superheroes?? Sign me up - amazing at chemistry and maths - puns - so many puns - you think you can beat me at mariokart? I was a lonely kid with no friends and too much free time. You will never beat me at Mario kart - fuck - watch your fucking language Wylan - sweaters - always covered in ink??? Kuwei yul bo - the odd one - he’s always there but he’s always not - the child of the group - he’s basically the weird thought you have at 4 am - not innocent - not at all - he kinda just sits back and observes - but that means he knows everything - he and Inej share so many looks - he’s a nerd in every imaginable level - him and Wylan fight over things all the time but they’re bros - has memorised the entire periodic table song - somehow has kissed more people than both Nina and Jesper - it’s 3 am and there’s a murmuring voice in the darkness - this is the periodic table nobl- - shut u p - chemistry and physics - can actually cook - rly close to matty and Nina - that one kid who purposely makes things explode - fire? FIRE - rlly bad at comebacks sometimes he just walks away

Matthias helvar - sports fan - all sports - doesn’t actually play them that much? He mostly just hits the gym - long hair - very philosophical - the mum friend - when I’m the voice of reason you know something’s wrong - can cook really well - always baking for Nina - gives the best piggybacks - everything looks so high from up here - Wylan loves it - tattoos - so many deep meaningful - he can’t go a day without saying they’re all horrible - he’s always searching for the truth - can tolerate really cold temperatures - plants - the sea - stands up for what he thinks is right - is actually how he met the crows - he was beating up some kids who were mocking someone with dyslexia - so he bears them up and when he rounds the corner guess who’s there - Kaz Fucking brekker - and so the induction starts

#six of crows #crooked kingdom #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #nina zenik #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #modern au #kuwei yul bo #Matthias helvar

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schrodinger-s-kitten · 7 years

Text

APH rarepair week 2017 day 5: mythology/AU Day!

Pairing: Scotland/Prussia

Rating: T

Warnings: blood, a few swear words, bad family relationships, Prussia might be a little OOC

I couldn’t resist throwing in some magic, haha I love fantasy

I friggin love this ship though, the only reason it’s not my OTP is because EngIta took that place

Enjoy!

Bad Days Make Good Things Happen

~=o-o=~

The forest was dark. The dense treetops blocked the moonlight and the few stars in the cloudy night.

Allistor should have come home earlier.

The forest's non-magical creatures weren't too dangerous, and he could defend himself well if a creature such as a wolf or an owl did attack him, despite his broken staff. But the magical creatures were something else. He did not want to meet with any faeries. Those tiny things were as dangerous as a bloody dragon at night. And they didn't like humans.

Every step was careful, the minimum of sound too loud. Every shake of a branch or leaf put Allistor in alert. Every shadow that not his own was a potential enemy. Hell, even his own shadow could be an enemy. Every sound had him searching for the source. He wasn't even using a light for fear of attracting something.

“Wow, you really hate the night, don't you?”

Allistor stopped, looking all around for the source of the voice. Nothing. This creature either hid in the trees, or was invisible.

“I mean, look at how you stopped now! I doubt you'd have if it was day.”

It wasn't a spirit. Its voice was too solid.

“W...where are you?” Uttered Allistor. He hated his tone.

“Oh my elven spirits. I'm not gonna hurt you, don't be so fuckin' afraid.” It sounded offended. “Here, I'm at your right.”

Allistor whipped around, and there it was. Clothed in brown, barefoot and with a bow and arrows strapped to his back. An elf. Arms crossed, an offended expression and a prideful stance.

Oh, no. An elf was the last thing Allistor wanted to encounter in the middle of the forest. At night. With a broken staff. He took a discrete deep breath, and hid the fear from his expression. He hoped he could hide it from his body language.

“What did you decide to taunt me for?” He asked. The elf shrugged.

“I thought I should have some fun, since my community kicked me out,” was the relaxed answer. The elf leaned on a tree, crossing his ankles. He grinned. “You up for a game'a hide 'n seek?”

“I'd prefer to continue my way home,” replied Allistor. He gulped when the elf's grin faded. The elf pushed himself off the tree, smiling again.

“Aw, then I'll go with you 'til the edge of the forest.” He stepped over to Allistor and offered a hand. “This is how you humans present yourselves to each other, right? I'm Gilbert.”

The mage gave Gilbert a distrustful look, but shook his hand.

“Allistor Kirkland.”

No strange feelings, no spells hidden in the hand, nothing. Maybe Gilbert was being honest.

They walked. Allistor was wary, and kept on the watch for any antics Gilbert might try. One could never be too careful with an elf.

“So where the fuck is your house that you had to go through the forest?” Asked Gilbert after some time, his eyebrows scrunched together.

“On the other side of the forest,” answered Allistor, deadpan. “There's a road, but going through the forest is shorter and the danger doesn't change a lot.”

“Ah.” Gilbert raised his eyebrows in understanding. “And what had you so busy you took until midnight to complete?”

Sigh. Allistor wanted to be home and sleep after the long day, not talk to a bloody elf while trudging through the forest.

“Your staff is broken.”

“You don't bloody say!?” Snapped Allistor. Taken aback, Gilbert raised his hands beside his head.

“Okay, sorry! I just wanted to talk!”

Silence reigned for a while. When Allistor's anger cooled down, he realised what a huge mistake he had made. Since Gilbert hadn't left his side, he must be a friendly elf, because any other elf would have ripped Allistor's arm off, or at least a finger.

“I was on the city back there,” said Allistor, pointing over his shoulder. The city wasn't visible through the trees anymore, but that was its general direction. “I sell potions and make staffs and wands. Some rich lady wanted her staff perfect, so it took some time.”

“Oh, so now you decide to talk,” scoffed Gilbert, arms crossed and an eyebrow arched. “All right. What kinda potions do you make?”

“Any,” shrugged Allistor, voice tired. “Most people order one or two for some specific thing.”

“Oh geez, you sound tired.” Gilbert clapped once. “C'mon, ask me a question, it's my turn to talk.”

The mage knitted his brow, but obliged.

“Where did you use to live.” His question was more of a statement, as he didn't bother with the intonation.

“Down a river 'bout that direction.” He pointed. “It's a pretty big community. As I told you, though, they kicked me out.”

“Why would they.”

“Shed some light on my face.” Allistor refused. He wasn't risking it. “I'm an elf. If something comes, I'll fight it off.”

It was a good argument. Hesitant, Allistor concentrated energy on his hand and generated light. He raised it to Gilbert's head, and let out an ‘oh’.

Gilbert was an albino. Elves demonised light hair or skin. Red eyes as well. If it wasn't for Gilbert's pointy ears and manner of clothing, Allistor would've thought he wasn't an elf.

“Only reason they kept me was because my mother insisted I grew among them. As soon as I became an adult, they kicked me out.” His voice was a little strained. He shrugged with a bitter smile. “Guess I’ll live wherever and nowhere now.”

An outcast.

They weren't so different, then.

“Well, there's the edge of the forest.” Gilbert stopped walking. “I guess we part ways here.” He smiled and waved as he turned back and walked away.

Allistor didn't respond.

~=o=~

Knocking.

“I'll be right there!” Called Allistor. He rushed from his workshop to the kitchen-lounge, and opened the door. His eyes widened. “Dylan?!”

His older brother grinned.

“Hello, wee brother.” Dylan pushed past Allistor and sat on the sofa. “I need a favour.”

“Then I expect something in return,” responded Allistor, voice cold, closing the door.

“Tsk, tsk...” Dylan shook his head. “Arthur did always tell you not to expect too much from the world.” He looked at Allistor. “Seems you didn't like that advice.”

Allistor sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

“Well, if you don't do me something in return, I won't do anything at all for you.” He strolled to his material shelves, taking a pot of unicorn mane hair.

“And how d'you know there ain't a mage better than you for the favour?” Growled Dylan.

“Because you came to my house.” Allistor took one hair from the pot and closed it. Besides, if Dylan gave up on asking for the favour because of a price, it'd be a win-win situation.

“Fine.” Dylan stood. “What do you want for the favour?”

Allistor smirked.

“Ahh, now we're talking.” He took his broken staff. “It depends on my side of the trade. What do you want?”

Dylan walked to the shelves and took a herb jar, showing it to Allistor.

“This herb. I need around four times what's in the jar.” Allistor arched an eyebrow.

“So that's why you came here.” Allistor put down the now fixed staff. “For that, I'll want about three pounds of wool from your sheep.”

“What?!” Dylan spread his arms. “That's an absurd!”

“Well, I'm lacking fabric for clothes,” shrugged Allistor. “And that way, I won't need more for a long time.” He looked at Dylan. “Of course, we could always call the trade off.”

Pause.

“You're insufferable,” fumed Dylan. “I'll come back in ten days with the wool. If you don't have the herbs, trade's off.”

“Of course, same way around,” agreed Allistor. “Farewell, brother!” He waved as Dylan walked out and slammed the door. He smiled, satisfied.

~=o=~

Allistor lied down and let a drop of a potion fall on each of his eyes. He blinked repeatedly to let it spread and ease the pain, and stood. He took his staff, and walked out the door.

The cave with the herb he was looking for was around a hundred metres north-east into the forest. It was the only cave in the region containing the herb, and would be fine to visit if it weren't for the gasses it released which blinded a human on long exposure.

On the entrance, blue and purple plants announced it was a venomous environment. Those plants stuck to poisonous ones and used the poison to grow. Further in, the herb Allistor wanted grew in abundance. He collected enough to fill the sack he'd brought with him and turned back.

As he walked back to the entrance, he spotted a brown patch under a non-poisonous bush. Leather. It was ripped, showing wounds on very pale skin. Allistor pulled the bush back to reveal Gilbert, beaten, bloodied, and hanging onto a last thread of consciousness.

“Gilbert!” Allistor crouched down and slid his arms under the elf, who groaned in pain. “Stay with me, it's all right.” Allistor lifted him from the bush, careful not to let him hit the wall. “Who...?”

“Elves,” moaned Gilbert. His struggle to stay conscious was clear.

“Let yourself be unconscious, Gilbert,” said Allistor, voice as clear as he could make it. “I'll take you to my house and take care of you.”

With a weak nod, Gilbert fainted.

Allistor walked as fast as he could back to his house. Running would exhaust him too fast and created the danger of tripping. He set Gilbert on his bed and rushed to the kitchen to find good medicinal herbs. Coming back to his room with the herbs, water, bandages and a towel, he took most of Gilbert's clothing off, and cleaned the wounds. He used the herb and water to create a paste, which he rubbed on the wounds to avoid infection. It was a good thing Gilbert was asleep through it, because they could sting.

A few hours after Allistor had bandaged the wounds, Gilbert woke up. A crash and a pained yell came from the bedroom, and Allistor rushed into it to find Gilbert on the floor curled up.

“Gilbert?”

Gilbert curled up tighter. Realising he was likely intimidating him with his height, Allistor crouched and laid a gentle hand on Gilbert's shoulder.

“I’m Allistor, Gilbert. Remember me? From a few days ago, in the forest?”

After a few seconds, Gilbert's posture relaxed a little. He turned over and looked at Allistor. Allistor made the gentlest expression he could with his bulky figure and thick eyebrows that were always low. Gilbert's whole body relaxed, including his breathing.

“Let's get you back on the bed,” offered Allistor. As Gilbert nodded, he lifted Gilbert onto the bed and guided his limbs to a natural position. “With proper treatment, your wounds should heal in around seven days,” he informed. “Do you want water?” Gilbert nodded. “I'll go get some for you.” Allistor walked to the well outside.

~=o=~

Gilbert's recovery was quicker than Allistor expected; likely due to elves healing faster, as Gilbert himself suggested. Well, neither Gilbert nor Allistor were complaining. Gilbert, to pay Allistor back for taking care of him, began helping keep the house clean and make the potions.

“I'll leave as soon as I've paid you back,” he stated one afternoon. “You wouldn't want an albino elf in your house.”

At the moment, Allistor didn't respond, only nodding in acknowledging. Later that night, though, he noticed he would miss having company. The next morning, he confronted Gilbert about it.

“You don't need'a leave,” he offered. Gilbert looked over from the pot he'd been cleaning. “It ain't good to live alone in the woods. Besides, I'd miss your company,” he admitted, a little bashful.

Allistor had never seen Gilbert so happy. He thanked Allistor more than once, and promised to help him with any duty he wanted. Allistor rolled his eyes and said ‘of course’.

A day later, Dylan appeared in the front door, with the three pounds of wool he'd promised. Allistor let him into the house, and examined the wool. It had no spells or potions. Allistor nodded in approval, and took the sack of herb from the kitchen. Dylan inspected it, and seeing it only had a spell to keep the herb fresh, stood.

“It's been a good trade, wee brother.” He grinned.

“Of course.”

As Dylan walked to the front door, Gilbert waltzed into the lounge-kitchen.

“Allie, the batch of instant ice potions is rea- oh you have a visitor shit I'm sorry.”

Dylan whipped around to stare at Gilbert, an albino elf, in Kirkland-made clothing, who’d called Allistor by a nickname, and talked like he lived in Allistor's house.

“Who is that?” Dylan punctuated the syllables with danger. Gilbert stepped back in the direction of the bedroom.

“He's Gilbert.” Allistor's voice was nonchalant as he threw an unworried glance at Dylan. “Lives here, helps with the job.”

Silence. Dylan's narrowed eyes cooled the room. Gilbert was ready to hide, and Allistor raised an eyebrow in a casual stance.

“Every time I come here,” scoffed Dylan, “you're a bigger disappointment to the family.” He turned and left.

Sighing, Allistor closed the door.

“Rude.” He turned back to Gilbert. “Come on, let's pack the potions.”

“What about your visitor?” Gilbert rushed to help him.

“What, my brother? He's an asshole,” shrugged Allistor. “My family already hates me anyway, and it's not like you're going to affect my job.”

Stillness. Then, Gilbert grinned.

“All right!”

Their lives were better from then on.

#post #hetalia #aph #aphrarepairweek2017 #pruscot #scotpru

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nish-e-r-r-o-r-neesh · 7 years

Note

Can I request cuddling Domestic!UsUk with all the fluff in the world? :)

Y e s!!!!! FINALLYencouragement to finally (/finally/) write about one of my main(*cough*thekingofmy*cough*) otps! Let’s do this!

It was raining and,well… I love the rain. Ehehe, enjoy!~ (Sidenote: not my fault I accidentally had Helpless on repeat for an hour and now it’sthe only song I can remember.)

Warnings: Extremefluff, extra sweet, plotless cuddling, some Hamilton thrown in becausebackspacing is hard now.

_____________________________________________

Fanfic: Rainy Cuddles

Domestic!USUK // alsoon FF.net

___________________________________________

“Look into your eyes,and the sky’s the limit…”

It wasn’t Arthur’s fault he had yet another one of America’sBroadway musicals stuck in his head. Well, in truth, the fact didn’t really botherhim as much as he let on. Some of America’s quirks might have actually rubbedoff on him. Not that he minded that either, of course.

Arthur continued to absentmindedly mutter out the song,mumbling or humming in place of the lyrics he couldn’t remember. It was rainingoutside; quite heavily, in fact. Wind whipped at the trees and bushes in thegarden, distant lightning streaks broke out in the gray sky. Arthur watchedfrom his cozy, warm spot by the window as the ladder resting on the side ofAlfred’s shed toppled over from the wind.

Most of the time, Arthur hated days like this. The rainalways gave him a feeling of dread and sluggishness. Not to mention that he’descaped from his own drizzling weather back in London, only to be greeted by astorm in the States.

Now however, curled up in a warm blanket on one of America’splush sofas he’d moved over to the window, with a mug of hot tea in his hands,he felt greatly at ease. The rain didn’t seem to be trapping him inside, butrather giving him a sense of comfort, that he was warm and indoors, and not outthere cold and tired.

Yes, in a certain situation, he did like the rain.

“Oh, you got mehelpless… Down for the count, and I’m—“

“And you said the song was ‘annoying’.”

England scowled. He could practically hear the cheeky grinin the other’s voice.

“I said you wereannoying, you dumb git.”

“So you do likeit. You like the musical!” America laughed.

England rolled his eyes. Still, he refused to look towardsthe doorway where he knew Alfred was standing. “Yes, I do. Now, are you justgoing to stand there being a cocky idiot about it or what?” he grumbled.

A few paddedfootsteps later, he felt the cushions sink and America’s familiar warmth envelopehim. He shifted a bit to allow the other some space, and soon America’s legswere up on the couch, arms around England’s torso and nuzzling his scalp, whilethe latter had his head resting against the other’s chest.

Yes, this was anideal situation.

The ring on Arthur’s finger clinked against the mug as hetook another sip of tea, after which he rested his hands above America’sentwined ones, grinning as he saw the matching ring on his finger.

Seeing the rings always sent a flutter through England’schest. Alfred sure knew how to take ‘Special Relationship’ to a whole newlevel. He wasn’t even surprised the bloody wanker got the Queen involved in thewhole ordeal; although he had to admit, it was rather sweet.

He was never one to brand America of all people as a hopeless romantic, but an elaboratesurprise set-up, a huge bouquet, a romantic dinner, fireworks, and the fact that he’d planned it forover three months…

Heh. Still, it wasn’t simply some cliché theme stolen from amovie. He’d actually planned it out. Ithad been just them the whole time, the décor was simple and very akin toEngland’s liking, the food was delectable and actually prepared by Alfredhimself- later admitting he had some help with France and Italy- and his little‘speech’ wasn’t the least bit pre-written or memorized. Alfred admitted hewanted everything to be sincere.

‘Nobody was perfect’,huh? Arthur begged to differ.

“What’cha thinking about?”

“Hmm? Oh, nothing…just…”

Arthur tried not to flush as his husband nuzzled his neck,planting one or two soft kisses on the skin.

“Just what?” He mumbled, sending a rush of warmth throughEngland. He smiled.

”Just you.”

England’s smile only grew as America laughed. “You’re in anunnaturally sappy mood today.” He remarked, and planted another kiss to Arthur’sneck. “So… can I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“You really liked Hamilton?”

Oh. Well, of course he did. Wait… was that… doubt in America’s voice? Fear?Apprehension? Either of the three… Ah, yes.

“Mm… even if it is aboutyour ‘Revolution’, there’s no doubt, it’s one hell of a musical. You said ityourself, all that is behind us now. Besides…” he said, craning his neck tolook his husband in the eye. Alfred was pouting, but looking hopeful all thesame. “I loved it.”

That had him smiling. “Just like you love me?” He crooned.

Arthur had to roll his eyes at that. Then again, he wasn’tin the mood for lying. “No, I love you far more.” he said, then quickly addedin a, “Bloody git…” Just for good measure.

Alfred laughed. “Aw, I love you too.” He planted a firm kisson Arthur’s lips before he could turn away—not that the latter was complaining.They both broke away grinning, and Arthur rested his head back against Alfred’schest.

The rain still raged on outside, the sky was beginning togrow dimmer and England was very certain that the tulips he’d planted the otherday were now uprooted and laying somewhere in the front yard.

“Hey… your tea’s all gone.”

Arthur glanced into his mug. “I suppose it is.”

“Do you want me to go get you more?” He smiled at Alfred’soffer, but shook his head.

“No, it’s fine,” He said. “Besides, you make a good pillow.”

“Alright,” Alfredlaughed. “You make a good teddy-bear too.”

“Mm… can’t argue with that.”

__________________________________________

Yeah… at one point Ialmost clawed my face off because (*lowkey screaming*Ishipitsofuckinghard)

Okay, thanks forreading, tell me what you think!

#fanfiction #request #still taking requests #usuk #domestic #cuddling #cuddles #rain #fanfics #hetalia #aph #england #america #alfred f. jones #arthur kirkland #hamilton #helpless #rainy cuddles #eranishxd

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hufflein · 7 years

Text

ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ

hogwarts is magical, even in terms of love. a story in which idiots pin after other fools that refuse to accept disgusting emotions. otp(s): sinmei, jessbom, naeun, & arichan. ✉: bc #yolo i have no life. this is for highkey for shits & giggles but also lowkey to give feelz to marauders squad.

“seungyeonie! there you are ~”

said boy peers up from the book he’s reading, blowing strands of dyed blond hair out of his eyes, a smile tugging at his lips. there’s merely one reason hufflepuff’s head boy would be searching for him, & one reason alone. “hello hyung. let me guess-- you’re wondering where mei is.”

shinhwa chuckles, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. “well. yeah. not that i don’t enjoy your company or anything. you’re great, kiddo.” he affectionately ruffles the younger’s hair, “let’s hang out tomorrow after your care of magical creatures class.” seungyeon playfully rolls his eyes, “yeah, yeah i’m up for it, hyung. in any case, your beloved happens to be with her friends. said something about heading to the great lake. i think saebom tagged along?”

- - - - - - - -

“saebom, WHAT in MERLIN’S NAME are you DOING?”

“i’m playing with the big guy, arazely. what else?” the slytherin boy smirks as he wrestles the tentacles of the school’s lake’s resident, the giant squid.

“oh my god why is he like this” mei groans, planting her face in her hands in embarrassment. “he really needs to stop asking for trou-- wait. jess?! where’d you get that popcorn?”

“shhh we’re trying to enjoy the show,” nadine automatically interrupts while shoving popcorn into her mouth, completely invested in the scene unfolding before them just as much as jess is. “MATE THIS ISN’T A REAL FIGHT, DON’T HIT ME, THE HELL! NOW YOU’VE DONE IT, C’MERE” arazely & mei both want to melt into the grass. saebom oh is overly frustrating ninety percent of the time, yet the two can’t help but worry for his dear life. - - - - - - - -

“what were you thinking? you could have gotten yourself & squiddy hurt! if i were slytherin’s head boy, i’d be taking points away for this.” the four girls watch sinhwa lecturing a soaked saebom from under the shady tree. his gentle nature is gone, a stern one taking its place. nadine elbows mei’s side, “your boyfriend’s kind of scary when serious. it’s beautiful.”

“he’s not my boyfriend,” she whines, shoving nadine away from her.

jess jumps in, not taking her eyes off of saebom. merlin, he looks more attractive than usual. “yeah, nadine. not her boyfriend. yet! soon hopefully. they’re both dumb.”

“um at least my quote on quote boyfriend hasn’t gotten into a wrestling match with the giant squid!”

“you want to fight? let’s go, right now.” “sit doWN JESSICA WE ARE NOT DOING THIS RIGHT NOW” arazely struggles to pull jess away before she lunges at their friend. nadine is no help whatsoever because she’s rolling on the grass, clutching onto her stomach from laughing too hard.

the commotion is so loud, the boys turn to them, a glint of curiousness washing over their confused faces. once they catch sight of the poor hufflepuff straining to pull back a wand equipped jessica, they rush right over.

- - - - - - - -

“you’re such an idiot. imagine if you had caught a cold. not that i care though. the entire fiasco was hilarious.” the lavender haired female speaks, ignoring her quickened heart beat.

she & saebom are currently making themselves comfortable in the slytherin dungeon’s couches. the fireplace is lit, providing a pleasant & much needed warmth to the boy that had gotten himself in quite the predicament not that long ago.

“it caught your attention, that’s enough for me. cold or not, it was worth it.”

“stop being gross, i’ll castrate you, i swear”

a pillow is flung at his head, hitting straight in the face. a laugh runs past his lips as he flings it back, careful not to smack her in the area in which she did him. his interest in jessica isn’t a secret. never has been, never will be. it’ll be shocking if anyone DIDN’T know about his known feelings, honestly. there’s nothing saebom wants more than to be able to hold her hand & kiss the top of her head, be with her during good & bad times. but, in the end, he can’t seem to read her or how she feels in return.

so, the only thing he can do for now is tease the heck out of her.

“hey, jess.”

“what?”

“you’re cuter than any pygmy puff i’ve ever seen.”

“IF YOU DON’T SHUT Up SAEBOM OH”

“it’s true though? when have i ever lied to you?”

gods, help her, she could explode at any minute & it’ll be all of his fault. why does he have to be irresistibly adorable? she could have fallen for any other idiot, but no, she had to fall for this specific one.

“you have three seconds to run before i ACTUALLY hex the fuck out of you. one.”

“JESS PLEASE NO”

“two”

“JESSICA”

“three”

a frantic saebom leaps out of the couch in under a split second, dashing tpwards his dorm room, leaving a pleased jessica smirking to herself in the common room. ah, yes, she indeed adores that boy. too much that she believes its unhealthy at this point.

- - - - - - - -

“i can’t believe mei & jess ditched us for their boyfriends,” nadine huffs, arm hooked with the girl next to her. “i know you wouldn’t betray me like this, ari. don’t be like those losers, stay the way you are: sweet & wonderful.”

“uhm, yeah, no, i wouldn’t dare to betray you like that. never ever, bub,” arazely says amusingly. little does her friend know that a bouncy ginger she claims to despise is heading their way, & of course the younger doesn’t warn her. why on earth would she waste an opportunity this good?

clearing her thoat, the hufflepuff hums. “will you look at the time! i’ve got to go meet up with.. um... seungyeon! that’s right, we’re having a study meetup today. gotta go, bye!”

“ARI, WAIt WHY ARE YOU RUNNING AWAY SO QUICKLY--”

“hey nadine. wanna go on a date?”

that stupid, beautiful voice. she knows its owner like the back of her hand. she takes back everything said about ari. she’s a fake & a liar!!! her friend is going to get it when she sees her again, she swears on merlin’s beard.

“i’ve told you, euncheol. i don’t date gryffindors. they’re losers” nadine turns to her housemate. yes. they’re in the same house, yet--

“you’re a gryffindor, nadine. calling yourself a loser now, are ya?” euncheol raises a questioning brow, arms crossed against his chest.

“i’m the exception. anyway, shouldn’t you be worried about, i don’t know, graduating or something? this is your last year. saddening, isn’t it?”

“mm, that’s exactly right. tis why i’m using the opportunity to see you again in future years. because you’re a person i don’t want to lose sight of.”

nadine is stunned for a few seconds, thinking how he’ll be the death of her. she goes from taken aback to pretending to gag. “you’re so disgustingly cheesy. but that’s something i terribly like about you.”

euncheol can’t help but grin from ear to ear at the sudden revelation. his cheeks turn pinkish, not knowing what to say.

the girl rolls her eyes before matching his smile. “hogsmeade, next saturday after the hufflepuff vs ravenclaw match. deal?”

“you got it!”

- - - - - - - -

whenever mei happens to be with sinhwa, they always somehow end up in the courtyard, especially during a bright, sunny day with a beautiful sky shaded blue. the pair is constantly seen together yet everyone wonders why they aren’t together-- a couple. their feelings for one another is clear as a patronus prancing its way through darkness.

taking a seat on the nearest bench, mei pats her lap with both hands, signaling him to rest his head on it. being head boy comes with countless responsibilities & although he seems to be unfazed most of the time, mei still worries.

sinhwa contently sighs the moment the back of his head is cushioned on top of her thighs. their eyes meet & they begin to laugh. her fingers soothingly thread through his dark strands, causing him to release another happy sigh.

“how’s everything? still pooped after that last prank?” mei questions with a faint smile. saebom & chanuk had made such a mess that day, they had detention for three weeks straight.

“i’m fine, really. wasn’t slightly fazed. those two don’t surprise me anymore. i should know better than to believe they’d grow out of being pranksters.”

“well, you know i have your back anyhow.”

“mm, that i do believe, miss megan.” he smiles, booping her nose. “thank you. your support is very much appreciated.”

truly, it’s no wonder that the student body knows there’s something there. seeing them interact like that can make even the headmistress swoon & that’s no lie because she has before.

- - - - - - - -

“seungyeon, seungyeonie, where is he? aaa i checked everywhere,” arazely pouts whilst walking the student-filled corridors.

okay, so maybe searching for seungyeon was simply to cover her butt in case nadine wanted to kick it for leaving her with euncheol, even if she did it out of love.

being deep in her thoughts, she doesn’t notice that she’s going to crash into the person in front of her until someone grabs her by the arm, bringing her to the side.

“watch where you’re going, ara. it would’ve have been pretty if you had bumped head first into that scary lookin’ dude.”

“oh, chanuk! you saved me from doing something dumb. again. haa, thanks for that.”

“how many times has it been now? a million?” he questions smugly. “you’re seriously indebted to me. who else is going to rescue you that many times? no one, only me.”

the hufflepuff girl pouts, “for the record, i don’t ask you to. you just do. because you’re kind like that. isn’t that right, chanukkie?”

“sure i am. to you. if it were anyone else, i wouldn’t blink an eye.” he shrugs his shoulders.

her face quickly heats up at his words & before she knows it, she starts running because nope, not today. good bye chanuk, you’re not about to make her feel things.

it’s not long after that the slytherin boy’s amused laughter echoes throughout the halls of hogwarts school of witchcraft & wizardry.

- - - - - - - -

next time on idiots in luv: arazely continues to run away from chanuk, jessica almosts confesses her tru feelz for saebom, mei & sinhwa have to do something abt these goddamn pranks, & nadine goes on her lil date with euncheol. that is all for today, goOD NIGHt.

#au:hp #ft:marauders #( I'M JDSJSD I HATE THIS BYE I'M LEABING NOW )

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