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#or as my friends like to call:
cinemacrypt · 1 year
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Trans people need to start naming themselves like puritans but like the other way. I need to start hanging out with bitches named Contempt and Decadence and Heresy
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yesokayiknow · 3 months
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i feel like it'll help non brits to know that davina mccall irl presents a show where she connects adopted people with their bio families btw
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lotus-pear · 2 months
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lore accurate teen soukoku. the worsties ever
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suiheisen · 3 months
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j… jesus oppa ;____;
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temeyes · 2 months
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to this day, they still don't believe him
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fansids · 9 months
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On their way to go annoy Miguel <3
(Ft. Meows Morales, Guin Stacy, Rabbitr Prabhakar, Margo Kestrel, and Yotie Brown)
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twistcmyk · 4 months
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skellydun · 1 year
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Actual Phone Conversation I Had With A Girl Absolutely Going Through It This Morning:
me very quickly: hi this is dylan from x. how are you today? is now a good time to talk?
girl on the phone: what? oh you know! it's just work, work, work.
me: haha yeah! Just another busy Monday :)
girl on the phone i have known for exactly 11 seconds: sometimes i wish it would just stop. it's relentless. and it's every week! how many mondays can someone go through?
me trying to do my job: ha ha i know right? so I'm calling--
girl on the phone i have known for exactly 16 seconds: i'm so tired. i'm soooooo tired. shelby kept me up all night again. she will not get over keegan. they keep calling each other just to yell i swear to god.
me: only 4 days till the weekend and some sleep! :D
girl: yeah. but she's sleeping with me. at my house. didn't he tell you? who is going to get the dog? or the fucking 300 dollar blender I got them?
me: unfortunately no! so i would love to know more but the reason i'm calling is to get you scheduled for x job interview are you still interested?
girl whispering: what?
me awkwardly: it's...i'm dylan. from x. the x job you applied for. we would like to interview you for it.
girl: oh my god. no. oh my - I am so sorry. I thought you were my friend--I cannot believe--I told you work was relentless. I don't really mean that! I talked about blenders!
me: no, no I totally get it. It can be. But that's why you're interviewing for somewhere better! Tell Shelby to apply too! Do you have any availability on Thursday?
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littlerosette · 2 months
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every so often i remember that katniss canonically dreamt of having peeta’s kid and then woke up the next morning feeling happy. in the quarter quell. she’s insane
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ominouspuff · 24 days
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Fwoom (intimidatingly)
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everysongineverykey · 8 months
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good omens the book, 1990: see, queen is so ubiquitous in london these days that if you leave a tape in a car for too long, it'll inevitably morph into a best of queen tape. which is why their megahits are playing in crowley's bentley all the time! isn't that a funny and topical joke?
good omens the show, 2019-2023: yeah crowley's car has a hands-free call system and also only plays cassette tapes. yeah it's whatever don't think about it. what's an incredibly earnest and passionate queen love song we can play during this scene where crowley tries urgently to reach aziraphale
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stranded-ziggy · 1 month
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Ghost x Soap || Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II
Happy(?) Valentines Day!
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luvit · 4 months
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(gn!reader, mdni 18+)
you didn't quite expect yourself to be in such a sticky situation. much less, with ghost being the cause of it
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you're hiding in the bathroom while sending, like, the 7th angry text in a row to ghost. you're pretty sure he's seeing these even though the read receipts aren't on, that he's just been watching the notication bubble pop up on his screen and watching as each new one covers the last one.
you're about to scream in frustration and finally resort to calling him. it rings twice before he picks up with a simple, "ghost."
"have you seen my texts?" you're whisper yelling in the bathroom, because you don't need anyone to walk in on you right now! not in your predicament.
"yeah." and his reply is so simple, so dry, so infuriating and you don't know what's gotten into him!
"you're not gonna answer me?"
"been a little busy, sweetheart," he says in a cocky tone. and you know that's a lie because you know for a fact he saw all of your texts. "'sides, i like the sound of my cum dripping between your legs."
the vulgarity of his words sends your face aflame and you cover it despite nobody there being able to see your face. you could cry from mortification... but your stretched hole was already doing the weeping for you.
a little bit ago, ghost had dragged you with him under the guise of having something important to give you. a quick dicking down was not what you had in mind at all. and to avoid suspicion of doing it in an empty briefing room, he came inside of you and pulled your underwear and pants back up, giving your bum a little pat before sitting down at the table.
yeah,,, ghost filled you up 15 minutes before a mission briefing together, in the very room you were going to be having said briefing. couldn't miss the way he smirked under his mask at the way you were squirming, feeling the fluids seeping out of you and making a mess of your underwear. the feeling had to clenching, trying to keep it in while it served as a very potent reminder of what happened between you two
the way his cock plunged so deeply inside of you and he grunted against your neck, pulling your hips flush to him and then finally releasing rope after rope of his thick seed while you squeezed him dry. the way he sat down after it like it was nothing and then in the middle of the briefing called out to you can asked "what's wrong? got something to say?" because you've been squirming so much.
to which you said no and tried to keep your head down for a little bit longer. eventually, you had to excuse yourself because the way ghost was staring at the way your thighs were trembling in your seat, you'd start leaking anew... this time with your own juices.
which leads you to where you are now, hiding in the bathroom after sending angry texts to ghost for telling him how much at fault he was for filling you to the brim and expecting it to not leak out? you're pretty sure he stepped out to take the phone call because you can hear him chuckle, a little echo-y so he must be somewhere in a hall
"where are you now?" ghost asks over the phone. you don't like the sound of his voice. but there's no way you can't give in to that commanding tone of his.
"bathroom." is all you can say, not telling him which one you're in, but ghost knows you well.
"hang tight, love. i'm on my way."
"are you going to-"
"make it worse? ...yea"
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do not edit or reupload my works elsewhere (reblogs welcome!)
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lotus-pear · 6 months
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god i love skk sm i wish gay ppl were real :(
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inkskinned · 1 year
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she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let
and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment
and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.
and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment
and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?
to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.
and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.
you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.
#this btw is not including toxic friendships this is legit just something ive experienced MANY times now#writeblr#you ever have a friend in one of those relationships where ur like#u don't HATE their partner explicitly#but ur like. what the fuck y'all#like the weird part of being an adult is that you can't be like . CERTAIN their relationship is toxic#and also if u move too fast or push too hard u can hurt someone who is already in a scary situation so you just are like#frozen there. laughing awkwardly. saying ''haha..... yeah..... couldn't be me....''#and like u can't tell - is this banter or does he actually think like. he's better than her.#all you can do is be there for your friend and hope they wake up to it#or ... that it really IS good#and it's just odd to you#tbh btw id rather have my friends feel safe coming to me if they have a concern about my relationship#like yes it's not ur business but it also IS bc im making u hang out with them and also ur my friend#it's a weird thing to experience as an adult bc it is such a blurry line and when u spend time#around couples that aren't like ACTUALLY ur friends but instead ''extended friend circle'' ur like#.... i don't know y'all well enough and he just called you a cow. and ur okay with that . and i don't know how to respond.#so ur like :) okay. um. go to couple's counselling i think#but also you are NOT supposed to pass judgement so it's like.... this weird limbo of feeling like you SHOULD say something#but knowing you CANNOT#idk that there's a way to resolve it!!!!!!!! it's probably a different approach person to person#edited my tags bc tumblr's new system fucked em up#PS EDIT: btw i should have said:#the pronouns in this can work in any and every direction. every gender and every sexuality and every#type of relationship tbh. even non-romantic relationships where ur like ''what do u mean ur bff calls u stupid''
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bread-that-draws · 11 months
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Flowey’s so funny and has me so fucked up like he’s a talking flower. He tries to kill you upon your first interaction. He is ten years old. He is damaged beyond repair. He’s a flower named Flowey. He’s become friends with every single character. He’s killed all of them countless times. He knows everything about everyone. He doesn’t care anymore. He takes care of his mom when she can’t take care of herself. He’s killed her before. He doesn’t care if you kill her. He thinks she’s trying to replace him. He just wants to be himself again. He wants to destroy everything. He hates you. You’re the only one who understands him. He wants his best friend back. He’s terrified of them. He believes in kill or be killed because he died by giving mercy to the wrong person. He believes himself to be the wrong person. He doesn’t understand when you show him that kindness he showed others, even when you know he could kill you for it. He’s tried every route. He asks you if you have anything better to do when you try to do the same. He’s a direct reflection of the player. He’s a fucking talking flower named flowey and his only voice line is by Ronald McDonald and his officially licensed plush does a little dance for you
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