Tumgik
#ooh what if the minions have other part time jobs .... like the just work at the local cafe during their off hours
povlvr · 2 years
Text
The Nanny Pt 1
Tumblr media
Pairing: DILF Bucky Barnes x Nanny
Summary: Bucky hasn't touched his philanderious wife since he first laid eyes on the new Nanny Amelia, after 6 months of tension things take an interesting turn.
Word Count: 2k+
Warnings: Smut, extra marital affairs, masturbation, mild porn with a plot.
A/N - Let me know if you want a part 2.
-------
'Amelia, please can you do the laundry today after dropping Ellie off at school?' Jessica barked.
'Sure Mrs Barnes, no problem'
These requests were becoming more frequent since Amelia first accepted the job offer to be the Nanny to Ellie, although she was happy to help out the couple it felt more & more like Jessica wanted to exert her power over the nanny.
The tension in the house was unbearable at times between Ellie's parents & it took Amelia the best part of three days of working for the family to notice it & to subsequently realise the affect it had on their daughter. Ellie was a smart, funny kid whose demeanour changed dramatically in her mother's presence, she withdrew & barely spoke which broke Amelia's heart at times, but it also made her determined to provide some warmth & affection to the girls world.
'Oh & I will be gone for the rest of the day; please can you tell my husband I will be home tomorrow.'
'Can do, have a nice day' Amelia said through gritted teeth as she left the house guiding Ellie to the car.
Great, she thought as she buckled the 5 year old into her seat. Don't worry about my plans or anything, yeah I'll happily wait around until god knows what time for your husband to finish work then pass on the message you're out fucking someone else. God she is a dick.
'Amelia' the little brunette said bringing her back from her internal dialogue that was raging, 'if mummy's not home tonight does that mean you'll be home all night with me?' A smile started to form on her beautiful face instantly calming the irritated nanny.
'Yes, until Daddy comes home but you'll probably be in bed when he does. Why don't we have a movie night with some popcorn?'
'Yessssss, ooh ooh can we please watch Minions??' she said excitedly.
Although Ellie had made Amelia watch Minions more times than she could count she wouldn't ever say no to the angel innocently clinging to her every word, she peered back though her rear view mirror smiling 'Absolutely honey.'
Amelia's day was spent in the Barnes' home, setting up for the movie night she had promised Ellie, she also begrudgingly helped with some housework by doing the laundry & some cleaning mainly to pass the time whilst she was waiting for the school pick up time.
After enjoying each other's company for the evening the little girl finally succumbed to sleep when Amelia set her down, tucking her in tight at her request.
-------
Hearing the front door opened was music to Amelia's ears.
'Jess, Is Ellie in bed?' Bucky shouted hoping to be able to tuck his little girl in before sleep as he walked through the house.
'Hi Mr Barnes, yeah she's fed, bathed & tucked up asleep' she replied from the lounge.
James Barnes was without doubt the hottest guy Amelia had ever spoken to, tall, dark, handsome with the most beautiful eyes known to man. He was always so kind & warm to her plus his daughter adored him & vice versa. How he ended up with his wife Jess, Amelia didn't know because she was the polar opposite, cold & unwelcoming at any opportunity she could find.
'Amelia? Why are you still here?' he said surprised to see her.
'Your wife said she wasn't going to be home until tomorrow, so I needed to stay until you were home.'
He let out a long sigh but quickly pulled himself together.
'I am so sorry Amelia. Please ring me if she ever does that again, I will make sure to leave work, so you're not stuck here.'
'It's fine Mr Barnes. She's a great kid so I enjoy hanging out with her, we had a movie night & she was ecstatic.'
'Please call me Bucky, Mr Barnes makes me feel ancient. Surely you've better things to be doing?'
'Not really, I just hung out here whilst Ellie was at school, did your laundry & some cleaning, before you know it, it was pick up time.'
He interrupted her.
'You don't need to do any of those tasks Amelia. Did Jess ask you to?'
'Don't worry about it. Honestly I really don't mind'
'God that woman infuriates me' Amelia could see how annoyed he was with his exasperated outburst.
'Ok, well I think I'm going to head home. Unless you need me for anything.'
Bucky's mind immediately went to the place he wanted her the most; his bedroom. He had been enthralled by her since she first turned up at his door from the agency & found himself thinking about her more each day that passed. His marriage was over a long time ago, he knew his wife was having an affair for the past year, but he carried on as normal for the sake of his daughter until the minute he saw Amelia. From that moment he hadn't touched his wife intimately, it had been six months & his lust for the Nanny was at an all-time high whilst his wife's visits to her lover more frequent.
'We've kept you long enough, it's late I'm sure your boyfriend must be annoyed at you being stuck here.' Real smooth Bucky, he thought.
Amelia was taken back by him mentioning her personal life, she didn't mind because there was nothing to know but she was intrigued as to why he seemed to care.
'I'd have to have a boyfriend in-order for him to be pissed at me for staying late.' She said half laughing.
'How is it possible that a woman as beautiful & kind as you are is single?'
Holy fuck, he thinks I'm hot.
'Who knows, maybe it's all an illusion & I'm actually the worst once you get to know me.' Amelia joked to ease the tension.
'I doubt it, but I guess I'll have to get to know you & then I can make an accurate assessment.'
'Seems fair.'
Their eye contact seemed to linger a moment longer as if they were magnets unable to resist the attraction to each other.
'Well, I better head off & get out your hair. I'll be here before you leave for work tomorrow so Ellie isn't left on her own with your wife being away.'
'Shit, I didn't even think. Thank you, we'd be lost without you. Please can you let me know when you're home safe.'
'Sure, I'll see you tomorrow.'
As Amelia left she couldn't help but think he was being flirty with her, she shook it off thinking someone as gorgeous as him would never be interested in her, plus he was married so it was a no go.
Once home she had showered & prepared herself some food, sitting down on her sofa she heard her phone buzz.
Amelia, did you get home safely?
Yes, sorry Mr Barnes I jumped in the shower as soon as I got home so forgot to let you know I was home.
The thought of her in the shower was enough for Bucky to grow an inch or two in his trousers, he was resisting the urge to pull it out & pleasure himself at the thought of fucking her against the cold tile bathroom wall. He knew it was unprofessional, but he didn't care, he wanted her & he always got what he wanted.
So, in the vein of getting to know you, what do you do with yourself after work?
Well your family keep me pretty busy so not much to be honest.
The agency did me an absolute favour when they sent you. I might have to send them a thank you gift.
Ha that's sweet, it's honestly no bother. Ellie's a great kid, you did a good job with her. If you ever wanted a night out with your wife I'd happily have her overnight to help out. TBH She could move in here & I wouldn't mind.
Is there room for two? Where she goes I go. We're kind of a package deal.
The more the merrier.
And there's more of a chance of me landing on the moon than having a night away with my wife
oh, well can't say I didn't notice the tension. Can I ask you something? You can say you don't want to answer.
Go ahead.
Why are you still with her if you can't stand her?
I was staying for Ellie Thinking it was best for her. But seeing her with you made me realise it wasn't.
Why did that make you realise?
The love & patience you show to her is what a mother should be like. Jess is none of those things. I'll be issuing her with the papers soon.
Good, you deserve better. My offer still stands if you need me to have her overnight for when you get back into the dating field.
It's been a long time since I went on a date. Plus If you're single, there's no hope for me.
As if, have you looked in a mirror? One night at a bar you'll have women desperate for you.
I come with baggage, separated with a kid.
A kid who you're great with. You'd be hanging out anyone you choose once they saw you with her. Major turn on for a lot of women, a good dad.
Bucky couldn't believe she was talking like this, he was getting harder at every message. He decided to be bold.
And what's your major turn on?
Amelia read & re-read the message a few times, did he really just ask that?. Clearly was doing some major flirting earlier.
What I look for in a guy turn on? Or sexual turn on?
Both
He had been palming his hard cock through his trousers hoping for a reply & when he got one he unzipped & began stroking his length.
I like tall men, dark hair, blue eyes.
Sounds familiar.
He smirked to himself that she perfectly described him.
Sexual turn on?
Someone taking control, me or them. Touching in inappropriate places. Having a hard-clothed cock pressed against me. The list is endless.
You have no idea what you're doing to me.
I can imagine. What are your turn ons?
He could only think of one thing.
You
And sexual?
It's been a while. So, everything.
How long?
6 months.
Wow. You must be jerking off morning noon & night
You have no idea.
You doing it right now?
Yes
I also love watching my guy jerk off That makes me drip from being so wet.
Are you touching yourself?
Yes. What would you do if you were here?
Everything I've been wanting to do since I first saw you. Taste you, run my tongue all the way up your pussy. Suck your clit, push my fingers in your tight hole & Have you cum on my hands so I can lick them clean.
Mmm Then?
Then I would fuck your mouth with my hard cock. What would you do?
I'd kiss you from balls to tip Before choking down your length Letting you fuck my mouth. Until you shoot your load down my throat & I suck every last drop out of you Tasting & swallowing your spunk.
Amelia hadn't ever been as turned on in her life. She decided to be bold & take control.
Turn on your face time, I want to watch you cum.
As soon as she sent it, a call notification popped up on her screen. She knew it was stereotypical, the nanny sleeping with the husband but she didn't care, she had been fantasising about him ever since he brushed past her & she felt what he was packing under his suit. If he said the words she would have gone back to his house & have him fuck the life out of her all night. She lined up her phone so he would see her hand down her knickers & pressed accept.
'Oh fuck, I wont last long if you're doing that.' Bucky moaned.
'Me either, god I want your cock stretching me.' She desperately whined as her fingers were working quickly to build up her high.
'Anytime honey, god I bet you're so tight.' He growled as his hand was pumping quicker & quicker, down his long shaft.
'I am, I want to cum with that big cock pounding me filling me up.'
'Oh you will, you won't be able to walk when I'm done with you. Cum with me sweetheart, i'm so close.' he ordered with his breathing laboured as his hands worked him into his release shooting his seed as he groaned in pleasure.
'I want to see you cum all over yourself. I'd lick it all off you if I was there.' She said close to her release.
'Oh baby it would already be down that pretty throat if you were, come on darling, cum on those fingers' as he said the words she felt her climax reach it's peak, moaning & twitching until the end.
'God you look so beautiful when you cum, see you in the morning sugar.'
Tomorrow would be a very interesting work day.
Part 2
579 notes · View notes
mhdiaries · 4 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Wave 3 Toralei Stripe Diary
July. Two. Five.
Ooh they’re telling math jokes now...
Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin Pi!
The math geeks I’m stuck on this bus with think that this is funny. So funny in fact, that the harpy sitting in front of me shoots milk out of her nose when she hears the punch line. I don’t think it’s funny at all. I’d rather be listening to the music I have stored on my iCoffin but two hours into our five-hour ride home my iCoffin gave up the ghost. It should have lasted the whole trip and then some except that one of my math camp roomies “accidentally” unplugged my iCoffin charger last night when she plugged in her fright light. I don’t even know why a ghost needs a fright light. What? Was she afraid she would trip over something and go “bump in the night?” I realized what happened when we woke up this morning but we had to leave first thing so I didn’t have time to put a full charge on it. At least I got enough battery life to block out the two hours dedicated to the singing of “X Number Bottles of Ghoul Juice on the Wall.” To add to the misery the seats on this bus only have room for two monsters and Meowlody and Purrsephone are of course sitting together which left me stuck in a seat next to a troll named Teala who had never been away from her bridge for more than a day until she came to math camp.She cried herself to sleep every night. Not that any other monster but me noticed but then again I notice everything. I also noticed Teala wasn’t laughing at any of the math jokes either. In fact she seemed to be more miserable than I was. Well now, here I was thinking she was missing her bridge but if that were the case why didn’t she seem excited about going home? “Dish,” I said. She turned and looked at me for a moment and then stared back ahead. “Okay - suit yourself then,” I said and then tried to curl up in the seat to take a cat nap which I had almost accomplished when she said; “My boy-fiend broke up with me...by text...the first night of math camp.” She still wasn’t looking at me but she wasn’t crying either. “He was my first real boyfriend and...and I don’t know why I’m telling you ‘cause you don’t seem to care about any monster besides yourself and you’ll probably figure out a way to use this to make me even more miserable.” I didn’t show it, but that really hurt. Just because I enjoy the chaos that a good practical joke brings doesn’t mean that I’m intentionally cruel does it? I don’t think it does and besides; where’s the fun of kicking some monster when they’re already down? It’s a lot more fun to see the surprise on a monster’s face when they think they’ve got it all together and you can “help them” see that they don’t. So I said, “Guess you better tell me the whole story then so I can do a thorough job.” That actually brought a ghost of a smile to her face. Teala told me that her ex boy-fiend was applying to colleges and that he decided he needed to keep his “options open” in case he might meet his “intellectual equal” at school. At first I didn’t believe he actually wrote that and then she showed me the text. “Does he really think he’s that smart,” I asked. She kind of shrugged and said, “He’s scary smart but not as good at math as I am, especially withy differential equations.” She told me he really wanted to get into this one school because his favorite mad scientist taught there. I’d never heard of the school but I knew who the mad scientist was because Mr. Hack made use watch a bunch of his videos in class. The videos were deadly boring but the mad scientist had this odd accent and strange speech pattern. I used to mimic his voice in class to make Mr. Hack jump. I’d wait until Mr. Hack’s back was turned and then scream, “Huhhacckkk - theeese stuuudannts reeelease youuu wuh-ill ah-yuat wa-unce!” It cost me several days in detention and a trip to Headless Headmistress Bloodgood’s office the last time I mimicked the mad scientist but even Mr. Hack admitted he couldn’t tell the difference between the scientist’s voice and my imitation of it. We talked about a few more things and then Teala finally fell asleep. I was able to finally fall asleep as well but not before having to hear another math joke followed by an explosion of milk from the seat in front of me.
July. Two. Eight.
I went to MH today to pick up some pictures I left in the FearBook office. When I was done I went up to the belfry. It’s a good place to keep an eye on things without other eyes watching you. It’s also a good place to take a nap. Usually the hunchback who rings the bells...the bells...works up there but he was on summer vacation in France or somewhere so I had the place to myself; until Spectra came floating through that is. She thinks that she’s very stealthy but it’s almost impossible to sneak up on me and I heard the rattle of her chains long before she actually appeared. I pretended to be asleep for a moment then with my eyes still closed I said, “What do you want Spectra?” “Oh, hello Toralei. Did you hear the news?” Most monsters don’t trust anything they hear from Spectra. I know better. There’s always an element of truth in her “news”. You just need to know how to listen. Here’s an example; Spectra told me she heard that Nefera is moving back to town and will be taking over for Ms. Kindergruber in Home Ick. Not only that but Ms. Kindergruber is also going to quit teaching to become a roadie for her favorite rock and roll band. Now as much fun as it is to imagine Ms. K. climbing stacks of amps while wearing a sleeveless leather vest, bandana and steel toed boots it’s not going to happen. Although when compared to the thought of Nefera actually “lowering herself” to teach, it’s practically a done deal Ms K will be hitting the road. I’m pretty sure out of that confusing jumble of information the one true fact is that Nefera is moving back to town and probably sooner rather than later...now there’s a monster who enjoys kicking some body when it’s down.
July. Three. Zero.
Got an email today from Teala, the troll girl I sat with on the ride home from math camp. Apparently her ex boy-fiend told her that he got a call from the mad scientist he wanted to study under. The scientist told her ex that his test scores indicated a “skuhh-ill weeeakness in diffuhh-wrenntial eeeequay-shunns” and that her ex should find some monster that was intellectually superior and “geeet sah-ummm tuutorr-ing”. Her ex was certain it was the professor since “no monster could fake that voice.” He also apologized to Teala for being an arrogant jerk and asked if she would tutor him in differential equations. Teala told him that she would have to check her schedule. Sometimes it is just purrrecious the way things work out for the beast.
August. One. Three.
I bought a ball of dragon thread today for Sweet Fangs. It’s just about the only material that’s strong enough to survive more than one play session with her. I don’t know what I’m going to do when Sweet Fangs gets bigger because I’m probably going to need the whole dragon and I’m not sure mom and dad are gong to be good with that.
August. Two. Five.
M&P came over today. They’re like my sisters and I can’t imagine how boring unlife would be without them. We do just about everything together and some monsters even think we’re related but we’re not. Not that it matters since we don’t really care what other monsters think anyway. We are who we are and any monster or monsters that want to try and herd us better get ready for a long miserable day. Today we weren’t worried about being herded, today was a brainstorm session. Our mission, repay Cleo de Nile and her minions for not only ruining our perfectly planned graduation prank but also for taking away part of our valuable summer vacation by “arranging” our trip to math camp. Knowing that it was Cleo who got the better of us is almost as irritating as being wet or having my fur stroked the wrong way. I can’t believe that I actually helped her when she first wanted to be a part of the Fear Squad. Cleo didn’t even know how to do a cartwheel, much less a round off. So I took her under my claw and taught her everything I knew and since I’d been doing gymnastics from the time I was a kitten I knew a lot. I finally got Cleo to the point where she started to “get it” and instead of being a liability she started contributing. I figured that for all my hard work and leadership Nefera would make me the Fear Squad captain when she graduated. Only she didn’t - she passed it onto Cleo. I can still remember what Nefera said to me when I confronted her about it. “I didn’t want Cleo to succeed - I wanted her to be humiliated but since you helped her, you get to deal with the consequences.” Then Cleo acted as if she deserved to be the captain and that she automatically knew everything there was to know about leading the Fear Squad. She should have showed some humility and stepped aside. She didn’t so now it’s up to me to teach her some new lessons and I can’t wait for class to be back in session.  
August. Three. One.
There’s a meteor shower tonight, which will give us the purrrfect opportunity to practice the three D’s. Divert. Design. Demure. First I divert attention away from myself - although tonight the meteor shower should do that for me, next I design a “surprise” for my intended victim student and then after the unexpected happens I demure - “Oh my, what happened here?” More later...
Ended up scraping the three D’s tonight, mostly because the meteor shower diverted me. I was supposed to meet M&P at this coffee shop down close to the beach - it’s the only time I go to the beach since sand + water + fur = unhappy werecat - but they were late so I grabbed a catnipuccino and waited. The owner turned down the lights of the shop so it was almost dark and then the sky was falling. The ghouls showed up just as somewhere down the beach a monster started playing guitar and I said, “Just because we’ve got nine lives doesn’t mean we need to rush through this one.” And we didn’t. 
64 notes · View notes
floette777 · 4 years
Text
Don't poke the Mama bear!
This is my first Hazbin hotel fanfic. Sorry if its too long, But I hope you enjoy it!😊
Character info:
Nickname: Nunya ( At first was use for being sarcastic to strangers asking for her name but starting to keep it), Mama(The kids) , Mama bear, sugar bear(Valentino) , Thicc mama(Valentino again and Angel just for fun) Thicc cheeks(Val STOP!)
Secret Real name: Lakisha
When/Cause of death: 1970-1997 blood loss and burns.
When Lakisha was a human and alive, She was a mother of 2 boys one is age 2 other is 8. She was happily married with her husband until she discover he cheated on her with a woman by seeing him in recorded video from her friend who sneakily spying on him showing he's with a woman kissing then he jokingly made fun about his wife for being too naive.
Angrily and heartbroken she decided to get a divorce and kick him out instead of forgiving him. But weeks later at night when the family is sleeping her ex-husband came back with his home-wreaking girlfriend to sneak in the house to murder her for insurance money and the kids for not wanting to pay child support.
After they done the job they started to burn the house to make it look like a fire related accident. While they busy making the fire unknowing to them Lakisha was still alive but barely struggle enough strength to stand.
She lost it when she saw her kids dead with blind rage she changed at her husband and the woman with a knife they left on the floor they use to kill the family and stab them brutally. She was too blinded by her own rage while stabbing them not knowing the fire rising around her causing the house roof to collapse on her and killed her.
After death Lakisha tragically separated from her kids and sent to hell for murder. Out of sadness , angry and confusion of seeing her arms turned to bear she wonders in hell thinking of her kids and why she deserves this harsh punishment.
Not long while walking around feeling lost in hell, Demons see her and starting to harassing her by still keeping some of her human appearance after death. Soon her rage builds greatly be the continuing harassment that cause her to snap to started slashes the demons with her claws then crush some of them by her hand with heavy objects she grab around her with physical strength.
Her intense blind rage cause her to have so much physical power that she end up knocked down building with her fist or punch a demon so hard make it to launch towards the building cause it to knock down. Powerful demons who try to defeat her get severely injured or kill by her claws.
Without her knowing news filming her carnage cause overlords to notices her. Most of them don't care about it while some are starting to take interest in her and keep a close eyes on her.
After there's no more demons come to attacking her, her rage fades and starting to get depress thinking of her kids that she'll never see again and wonders the streets. Not for long she took a job to be a meat cutter after a butcher see and amaze by her quick cutting skills slicing the flesh off the bone of a animal she hunts.
He want to know her name and she jokingly call herself Nunya but the butcher didn't notice it and starting to calling her that. She so mentally exhausted to care to correct him and just keep it as her nickname besides she's not comfortable to give her real name strangers especially demons. He call himself Butcher. (I know lazy am I right?) Who also don't like revival his real name.
She accepted his offer since It's useful for her to get easy money and food since she doesn't really enjoy killing even though she hates to admit that it is a good stress reducing at times.
He show and gave her apartment since the demon who lives there not too long ago left the area out of fear after seeing her wonders around the area then remembering facing her and in up with close to fatal wounds by her claws. She thanks Butcher and walk inside thinking of resting before work while having thoughts of her kids thinking if they doing well in heaven.
While working she been visit by other strong demons who wanted her to join them but she shrug it off and didn't care about getting more turf since she have already have a apartment roomie enough for her so she good for now and plus she enjoy her freedom to do whatever she want. Some will not take no for answer and try to force her to join.. Well, Let's just say they didn't come out in one piece.
She heard about overlords from Butcher while she working cutting meats warns her saying "You better be careful out there and not make your anger blinded you especially if you ran to a overlord."
She look at him confuse "Overlord?". Butcher nods "They're far more stronger then the other powerful demons you faces, It be suicide to go facing one of them, So be careful." She stare at him and nods, she doesn't care much about the warnings but keep a eye out.
Valentino was the first overlord she met and Boy she dislike him greatly. Nunya was walking around the city avoiding crowded places to not get attention to herself and cause unnecessary fights since she like her alone time while being free from work today. She fails at that.
Soon a red Limo slowly stop beside her but she pay no mind kept on walking. If its another demon try to fight her, It will regret it greatly once she get her hands on them for trying ruin her day off work.
She hear the glass window of the limo going down but didn't look back and kept walking. But she pause her walk after a voice of a man call out to her saying something that want to rip the throat of this person who saids it.
"Hey baby, Where your fine thick bear a** going." She slowly turn around ready to slash the face off whoever saids it. Then see a man sitting in the back of the limo wearing a something like a trash rich pimp she see in movies when she's alive, Giving her a flirtation smirk. While a woman who wearing things that doesn't look like clothes to her since it barely cover her body, sitting on his lap but got off after that red pimp moves her away while he got Nunya's attention.
"Don't call my that, If you want to lose your face." She say after fully turns around staring at him in the eyes with full of anger and annoyance.
He creepy smile with amuse of her anger. "Ooh feisty~ I like that in a woman." He lick his teeth while looking at her, She cringe at that. He continues " I been watching you baby and let's just say, I enjoy that spicy spirit when I saw you on video."
"What!? Video!? You telling me this city have security camera around her!? She turn her head to looks around at building her to see if she spots one. He ignore her question and continue. "I couldn't stop seeing you in action, ripping your enemies apart, slashing them till there nothing but pile of flesh and kicking them hard that makes your big booty jiggles."
She stare at him in horror and disgusted having her claw out ready to kill him. He unfazed by her and continues "You also still having your human appearance that's make you even more desirable. I want to part of my minions and don't worry I take great care of you. You'll be one my top assistant. So what do you say baby cakes."
She stare at with even more disgust. "GRRR, How about a great big more like a giant fat NO!! An take your creepy perverted behind self an your pimp wagon an SCRAM!!!" Then she fast walking away from him to get as far away as possible from him. Valentino was surprised at her out-burst then started to laugh by amusement. He yell out for her saying "My Offer is still in the table baby, I be waiting for you Thicc cheeks!"
She pause her fast mid walk then quickly turn to look at him glaring at him angrily. "Call me that again, I'll rip your balls out." Valentino look her up and down then say "Wow, I didn't even know you're that kinky thicc cheeks".
Nunya have enough of his perverted nicknames then make a bear roar then charged to crush him and the Limo he's in but it drove off before she got the chance. Valentino yell out saying "I see you soon thicc cheeks!" Nunya right eye twitching while watching the limo drove off and she hoping heavily to never see the perverted demon again.
Unknowning to her since she didn't buy a T.V yet. She was on the news again today showing her her yelling and threatening overload Valentino ready to fight him. "And there the video! Crazy right, The raging bear woman have to be one retarded demon to yelling at a overlord! Do she have a death wish!? I do hope so, It give me more action and bloodshed in the news if that happens!" While laughing.
Unlucky for Nunya, Because of that video that the news video showing her yelling at Val" A overloads who watches her on a news video is taking a even more interests in her smiling sinister while watching the video.
She return to work next day right after she step in the meat market, Butcher came toward her saying " Are you insane!?
She look at him confuse. "What are talking about?" Butcher wiping the sweat with his cloth and explain. "The news of you arguing at Overlord Valentino!" She look horrify at him. "You tell me that man a overlord?"
Butcher look at her and nod. "I couldn't blame you of being scare. Realized you just coming face 2 face with a overlord can be one of the most terrifying thing in hell but You luck he didn- but was stop by Nunya. "l wasn't scare about him being a Overlord, I'm more upset that I can't easily kill that pervert pimp the next time I see him!"
Soon she pause."Wait, I'M ON THE NEWS!?!?
A while after that mess with discover the perverted pimp is a overlord and her being on the news that she or butcher didn't know how able to film and put it on t.v so quickly.
She thankfully didn't met with any overlords especially Valentino yet for awhile knowing she might not be lucky next time if the a overlord not gonna take her refusing to join them and take her by force. She will fight to not be a toy to let them do what they want with her. She knows she can't beat a overlord but she will not back down even if it's kill her.
Years later she still thinking of her kids and sadden she will never see her kids and family again. She is still thankful her kids are in a safe place and not down here with her in this horrible place.
She still have the hatred of her ex-husband and that home-wreaker woman. She knows their somewhere in hell but not going to bother searching for them to kill them all over again since its a waste of her time and he kinda forgave them for murdering her, But she NEVER forgive them for taking her childrens life. If she see one of them, She make sure cut them in diced and feed them to hellhounds for murdering her kids.
While walking back to work to the meat market she then saw the scorpion child a cross the street begging for food then she see a demon harshly shoved the child to the ground while laughing. Out of shock and rage she quickly went over then grab the demon by lifting it by the head saying threatening "If I ever see you put your nasty hands or hurting a child again, I will rip you apart, NOW SCRAM!!!" She throw the demon into the sky far away and don't care where the demon landed.
Xosa look amazed seeing the demon who harm her throw up to in the sky then look back Nunya amaze but and look at her confusion. "W-why you help me? Mother say, i-it's normal for demon to be c-cruel and hitting me. It's part of life in hell." She saids while nervously look up at the bear demon waiting for a answer.
Nunya look at a little shock that the little girl's mother said to her being harm is normal but quickly changed her expression. "Just because I'm in hell doesn't means it's ok to harm childrens. Beside it's disgust me how they treated anybody who defenseless and desperately needed help". Xosa surprised by her answer and start to tear up by her kindness.
Nunya ask she come with her if she like so she can give her some meat to eat. Beside she hate to leave her here alone and defenseless with dangerous demon roaming around. Xosa nods and followed closely.
Unknowingly a demon in red smiling sinisterly at them with amusement from seeing the whole scene.
During there walk to the meat market, Xosa explain why she alone saying her mom abandoned her for a rich demon while saying she doesn't want a worthless child in the way of her becoming a wealthy woman. So she was toss her out of the car by her mom and drove off while hearing them laughing. She been struggling to survive and hide from dangerous demons for weeks until she couldn't bare being Hungry and start begging for food.
Nunya is angry and disgusted by Xosa's mother action then turn to sadness for Xosa being homeless and defenseless in this dangerous place. "Hey, I know you just met me but, do you want to be adopted by me? I promise I will take care of you and make sure no other demon harm you." Xosa surprised by that then started smile at her and nods happily "Really!? Yes please! You so nice to save me from that mean ol demon! Not many demons help another in need! You're also so strong! I want to be strong like you, I want to throw others who attack me with ease!".
Nunya smile looking down at the little girl talking fast while happily skipping next to her holding her hand then pause a bit and realize she haven't been smile or feel any kind of happiness for years during her first day in hell. She thinking back her kids when she alive with them, She really missed that feeling.
The Butcher didn't mind Xosa staying in the shop while she working as long she doesn't mess with his precious meats. Xosa soon wants to help around the shop because of boredom then Butcher let her help cleaning by wiping the glass and sweeping the floor to help out.
Days later Nunya standing in behind the meat stand waiting while the butcher take a restroom break. She watch Xosa drawing and coloring something on paper on the table then they both heard the front door open and see a strange demon in red with animal-like ears looks like a fox ears? No, not a fox since they don't have tiny antlers, maybe a deer she thinks. She see he's dressing something like her grandpappy use to wear back in the day when he was young. The red demon came in and walking towards her while smiling widely at her in a way that she doesn't feel right about and most weirded that she is hearing... Static noises?
The smiling red demon greeted her. "Hello dear! I just wonder if you see the Butcher. I want to speak to him!" She is surprise by his voice sound like a radio but calmly respond. " The butcher is taking a dump break, He be out the restroom soon."
The red demon make a disgust look while smiling. "Miss, You don't have to tell me the full details. You could just say he taking a quick break."
Nunya shrug but apologize about it. "My bad, let's start over. Hello welcome to the to meat market. Sorry the butcher you looking for is busy right now, He's taking da poo poo." The red demon face froze while smiling. She hears a little giggles then look behind the red demon to see Xosa covers her mouth trying to quiet her giggles. Nunya smiles then stop after hearing loud static around her then look back at the red demon and see his face change into a even more creepier look. But instead of showing fear she just raise her eyebrows while looking at him in the eyes unfazed with a are you serious look. She never met a demon get so work up over her say dump or poo before. Of all the nasty things she heard demons said in hell that tick him off? Really.
Before anything happen Xosa ran up happy between them showing her art she done "Mama look I draw and color you!" Nunya quickly forget about the intense stare down with the red demon. Look at the picture she draw and her heart melts. The red demon see her eyes sparkles in a pure motherly love that he never see for a very long time.
"Aww, Thank you sweety! That's the most beautiful drawing of me I ever saw!" Nunya say sweetly. Xosa smiles turns toward the red demon her art happily showing to him asking what he thinks.
Nunya almost forgot the about the mysterious red demon she quickly look at him seeing him looking down at the art Xosa showing with the same creepy smiling on his face with statics sound getting louder. Before she react.
The red demon stop his creepy look and praise Xosa " My , my ,What a amazing draw you did there my dear! You'll make a fine artist if you keep it up!" Xosa gleefully thanked him and ran back the table to draw more.
Nunya surprise about that since almost every demon they met be rudely ignore her or threatening Xosa. She will punch the demon threw a brick wall who even dare hurt Xosa.
She about to apologize for her rude behavior early but it went down heel after the smiley demon say in a more sinisterly way. "If the child didn't interrupt me, I will rip your tongue out by now.
Static started more loudly again with redness colors slowly forming around them.
Nunya silently look at him with wide eyes. The red demon stop his threatening looks and smiles satisfy thinking he scares her... Boy was he wrong.
Slowly Nunya face goes to shock to a raging look then quickly grab him by the waist with her one big bear hand and lift him up with ease.
She roaring shouting "HOW DARE YOU THREATENING ME!!! I WAS ABOUT TO APOLOGIZE FOR MY RUDE BEHAVIOR AND YOU SAY YOU WANT TO RIP MY TONGUE OUT!?!!? I GONNA SNAP YOUR WAIST LIKE A KIT KAT BAR!!!!"
Xosa quickly went behind the table scare knowing how her Mama is toward demons did anything to make her mad. Before anything happen the butcher calmly walk out the back room after done his business while the sametime hearing Nunya raging voice again after a demon goes to far too anger her.
But it's a good thing he did use the restroom, After seeing what Nunya grabbing in her bear hand while shouting at, his blood drains from his face when he see its the radio demon who looking at her stun while smiling. He would of sh**ing himself.
Butcher quickly rush to grab her shoulder to get her attention, before Nunya turns her head about to him to tell him what's going on. She see the Butcher face is pale and sweating with fear. She never see him this terrified before.
Butcher look her in the eyes try to stay calm but failing badly said "N-Nunya, P'p-put the r-radio demon down, Now." Nunya look at him confuse. "Radio demon?" She look back at the demon name radio demon seeing he didn't try to move a inch at her grip just starting at her like at smiling statue. That really creep her out.
Nunya look back at the butcher say " Why? I about to toss the smiling red lamp post out of- The Butcher interrupt her " Nunya! T-this isn't no regular demon, He a overlord but far more stronger." Nunya silently look back at radio demon who she still holding by the waist still didn't move just starting at her smiling with no change of expression.
Nunya look back at the butcher then say... "You mean this life size strawberry popsicle looking man is a overlord?" Before butcher say anything they both hear a finger snap then suddenly black tentacles came out of nowhere grabbing her arm that holds the radio demon and squeeze it painfully making her let go.
Nunya slash the tentacles that holds her but more came out of nowhere and grab her. Xosa was crying for her and the butcher bowing begging the radio demon to forgive them but he didn't pay attention to him but at Nunya seeing her keep slashing and ripping his tentacles that keep reappearing and tightening their grip on her. He amuse at her not backing down even though she losing this battle with the tentacles starting to tighten around her body making her make a pained expression.
Before he move his fingers more without flinching he feel a sudden pain cause him to pause for a bit after feeling he was jab by something sharp behind his leg. Instead of turning around body he just turn his whole head around see the little scorpion girl looking at him tearful angry eyes using the tip of her tail to stab him with poison but it barely did a thing but make his leg feel a little numb.
"L-Let go of Mama! You mean demon! Radio demon look at her amuse then his shadow grab her and lift her by the tail. Xosa scream out of surprise as the shadow lift her face 2 face with the radio demon in fear.
"You know it rude to interrupt a adult conversation."
Xosa start to cry in fear before the radio demon do anything he heard a bear like roar and see the bear demon Nunya struggling ripping the tentacles apart slowly pulling towards the radio demon while his tentacles try to pull her back. "LET HER GO YOU SMILING PIECE OF SH**"
The radio demon smile even more widely with amusement at her determination to get him with her claws but failed as the tentacles drag her back.
The radio demon smile and then say to her "You know, It was very rude of you to grab me without my permission, Dear." He then turn and was about to snap his fingers toward Xosa
For the first time in hell Nunya show fear at her face. "STOP!!!!"
The radio demon pause and look at her. Nunya look at him with a fearful look on her face. "Please.. Don't hurt Xosa. You can rip my arm my leg ANYTHING. Just don't hurt her."
Radio demon smile at her more darken. "How about another deal, Join me become mine servant."
Nunya flinch at that, She doesn't want to be tied down by some demon so they can do whatever they want with her but agree for Xosa sake.
"GRRRRrrrrrrrr......*sigh* Fine."
Radio demon smile widen at her then said. "Wow I didn't expect that be easy!"
Nunya pause for a bit... "Wait wha-"
Radio demon snap his fingers then tentacles quickly left down the floor then the shadow let go the Xosa by dropping her on a chair and everything went back to normal.
Nunya look around seeing everything fix like there wasn't any tentacles come out of the floor. She look to see the butcher alright he was breathing heavily with his eyes look like it about to pop out.
Alastor turns and smile at her with excitement " Bravo that was spectacular! I never expected a demon will willingly sacrifice there life for someone! What a wonderful performance!" They hear like audiences clapping out of nowhere.
Nunya was confuse and speechless. "What are you talking about?"
The Radio demon explains " l been watching you for a while for awhile dear and I got to say I was amuse by you since the first day you came to hell. I want you to join me but I realized you are one tough cookie with claws, I seen many other powerful demon try to make you join them including.. Valentino..
The radio demon say the perverted overlord's name with disgusted. Hey at least she not the only one who dislike him.
The radio demon continues "I notice you will fight to the death to not be tied down to be a servant to another demon for your freedom and I don't want that no no no no that be a tragic waste of entertainment if you die! So I wait patiently to find your weaknesses so I can have a chance to make you join me willingly."
Nunya left eye twitch trying not to snap while he continues.
"For years I was about to give up knowing nothing in hell will break you're ferocious spirit to join me but then that day you met the little scorpion girl."
The radio demon look at Xosa and Xosa look back confused. Nunya getting more angry with her claws scratching the flood trying so hard not slicing and dicing the red demon.
"After seeing you protect the poor little orphan child, I see your face starting to lighting up and you smile for the first time in years ever since you adopted little girl. And I must say you have such a sweet smile."
The radio demon take a look at Nunya face seeing her looking very angry ready to slash him in half.
"So I decided a great plan of using Xosa as a way to break you spirit to join me and well you know, It's works!"
The Butcher look at the radio demon with fear and exhaustion from his heart pounding fast. "So you wasn't going to kill us and destroying my market?"
The Radio demon start to laugh with the audience laugh with him "No, no, My good man, Your market have the bestest meat in hell. It be a terrible waste! Beside it was all a act! Except the part she grabbing my waist almost crushing me, Now that's a shocker!"
The Butcher sigh with relief then thanking the radio demon for not killing them and destroy the market.
Nunya... Is about to lose it.
Xoxa came and ask the radio demon " You're not going to hurt me?"
He smile at her " Oh course my dear, I wasn't gonna hurt you. Until you stab me behind my leg with your stinger, I was going to let my shadow and pop your little tail out.~
Xosa stare at him with wide eyes then run quickly toward her Mama hiding behind her glaring at him while Nunya growling at him for scaring Xosa.
The radio demon laugh "I was joking my dear.... Maybe."
The radio demon soon turns to the door. "Well, look like I over my stay my welcome today, I have a busy day to finish! I will dial you when I need your servants. Also Butcher , Make sure my order ready next time I come."
The Butcher nods feverishly.
Before the radio demon leave out the door he look back at Nunya. "You can call me Alastor and smile my dear, You never fully dress without one." He then walk out.
Butcher sigh closing his eyes " Thank goodness everything is fine again, Seriously Nunya you should be really careful next-
He open his eyes and see only Xosa looking where the door is. Horrify he look quickly at the door to see Nunya runs out the door.. His heart stop for that moment.
"Alastor!" He stop his walking and look over his shoulder to see Nunya running catching up then stop in front of him breathing heavily.
"Yes my dear?" Alastor turns while smiling. Nunya look at him with a look with no anger look in her eyes but looking nervously at him. Looks like she starting to respect him after seeing his power he thought.
Nunya then look at him in such a soft smile. He didn't lie about her having a sweet smile he like to see that more.
"I want to thank you properly for not destroying the market and not hurting Xosa. Butcher work very hard to making the best meat in hell and he been helping me ever since my during my first week here. I will feel awful if I be the cause of his business to be ruin.
Alastor smile widen " Of course my dear. You don't have to worry about that. Like I say before it's was all a act! He is my favorite meat seller you know!
Nunya nods smiling and continue " Also is it really true that you say my smile look sweet to you?" Nunya looking down the ground while blushing.
Alastor look at her speechless, It's so weird to see her like this since he use to her I'm gonna kill you look but he not surprised, He always have that charm to easily sweep girls of their feet. "Of course my dear your smile look very pretty on you!"
"Awww!" Nunya ran to him to give him a bear hug on his waist and Alastor frozen of her unexpected action with a sound of record screech. "Thank you~." She say sweetly.
Alastor try to move her bear arms off him. "My dear, Can I ask you to not hug me with my permission. Next time I won't be forgiven."
While he say that, He didn't see the pure fiercely rage on her face returns ready to snap.
"Oh don't worry, it won't happen again, Alastor~" Suddenly her bear arms tighten more on his waist. "Alastor?"
Alastor look down at her getting annoyed of her still hugging him. "Yes dear?"
"GO TO HEAVEN!!!!!!"
Before he react she quickly spins with him and use all her strength to throw Alastor up the air while he screaming in a inhuman scream (Is that what deer's scream sound like?) while a sound of static slowly fade with him and he disappear into the sky.
She yell at the sky where she throw him "THANK YOU FOR SHOPPING AT MEAT MARKET HOPE TO SEE YOU NEVER!!!!!"
She then walk by Butcher while he and the other bystanders look up the sky at shock where they last seen the radio demon.
" Let's get home Xosa. So I get ready to make dinner we having shepherd's pie tonight!"
Xosa jump happily " Yay can I help cook?!"
"Sure sweety , See ya tomorrow Butcher I'll bring you some pie as a apology for today. Well have a good nite." They both walk away.
Butcher didn't say anything but his eyes widen with face frozen looking at the direction of the sky where he last scene Alastor thrown. "This woman gonna get me kill."
Later that night after she and Xosa done cooking before they start fixing their plates she heard a a knock on the door. She look at Xosa as a signal to go hide just incase it's a unwelcoming visitor.
When she get closer to the door she hear... Radio Static. (Dang he came back that quick!?) she thought to her self. She expects him to confront her tomorrow when she work. Why he had to come in the middle of Shepherd's pie nite. She sigh and open the door seeing a Alastor with a even more sinister face with his eyes growing.
She notice he's all wet from head to toes with his deer ears lower on his head. Curious she asking him before he kills her.
"Before you rip my tongue, Can you tell me where my throw land you?"
Alastor smile widen but in a very I will rip your heart off and eat it in front of you look but decided to hold on a bit and tell her before punishing her GREATLY! "Well my dear~ When you rudely throw me up the sky tell me go to heaven and no I didn't make it to heaven."
Nunya is not surprised by that but still a little disappointed.
He continued "when I falling I land in a middle of a pool." Nunya look at him even more disappointed. "Well I don't see you to get that mad, At least you land somewhe-
Alastor raise his hand to stop her. "It's not just a pool... It's was Valentino's...
She about to speak again but stop again by his hand. " It's wasn't empty... He was there with many other demons and they-" Alastor look like he about to throw up. "Having a orgy..."
She look at him horrified. "Oh wow, I was hoping I throw you and you landed on sharp rocks but that 100x worst.
She shutters remembering her first encounter with Valentino. She really hope not see him again anytime soon. "Sorry about that, I not apologizing for throwing you you deserve that but sorry for landing you in one of the most horrific parts of hell" She cringe thinking about Val's pool party.
Alastor agree with a slow nod. "It still doesn't change that I will punish you greatly for that." he growls while static getting more louder.
Nunya sigh not surprised about that. "Ok before you rip something like my tongue out, Can we do this after we eat? I made Shepherd's pie."
Alastor pause "shepherd?" Alastor look at her with confusion.
"You never heard of one?" She ask him curiosity.
He stare at her and shake his head slowly as a no. Then she got a ideal. "Hey if you enjoy my Shepherd's pie will you won't rip my body apart?"
Alastor growls at her with statics sounds getting more loud while smiling ready snap his finger to summon his tentacles to rip her arm off but He then thinks a bit after smelling the food coming out of her home , He didn't taste any new food for awhile and he is pretty hungry from the mess she put him through. He still remember feeling those succubus try to grab at him while he try to escape at Val's abomination pool while Val laughing at him struggling to get away from those nude demons. He shuttered thinking about it. Plus ripping her arms off will cripple her losing his entertainment he was waiting for a long time.
"Fine dear, If the pie you made is good I won't rip anything from your body but if it's not good..." Radio Static slowly building to be louder "Say goodbye to one of your arm." Alastor say in a darkly radio voice.
Unfazed by his threat Nunya let him in then walk towards the kitchen. Xosa glare nervously at Alastor hiding behind the couch but come out when Mama call her. "Sweety, May you go get two big towel for me please?" Xosa nods but look at Alastor glaring at him with a I don't trust you look and left to get some.
Alastor look around the apartment couldn't help how cozy it looks and feel here inside like there not in hell.
He look see some drawings on the short living room table with crayons on top he could tell was Xosa with some drawing of herself pretending to be a some princess wearing a big pink dress while holding a sword with a coloring of red post to be blood on the tip of the blade. "Oh how cute." He thought while smiles sinisterly. He see some drawing with her with Nunya and a somewhat funny drawing of Butcher.
Nunya look at Alastor making show her isn't wonder of the house then see Xosa coming with towels. "Here Mama! I got clean ones!" She say proudly. Nunya smile at her " Thank you sweety." While motherly petting on Xosa head.
Alastor looks at them then sudden remember when his mother affection by petting his head. Alastor big smile almost loosen but quickly rise back seeing Nunya walking towards him then holding up a towel for him.
*Here, don't want you to keep tracking water on my floor. I also have to remember bleaching the floor later. Knowing where those water came from." She said while cringe thinking about of Val's pool.
Alastor look at the towel and grins. "No need my dear!" Nunya looks at him confuse before she say anything Alastor all of sudden shake his head making the water splash around her.
After he down she stare at him with in wide eyes didn't once move while hording the towel toward him. He then snap his finger and he incently dry like he wasn't wet moments ago.
Xosa who's lucky not close enough to get a drop on her look at her Alastor then at Mama in shock seeing wet droplets everywhere on her mama's face and apron.
Nunya right eye twitching looking at the smiling red dear demon trying hard not to choke him "Why didn't you do that before you walk in my apartment? " She say trying not to yell.
Alastor chuckles sinisterly. "Let just say it's part of your punishment, My dear.~" Nunya claws starting to come out but retreated back. Nunya sigh try to calm herself then turns around towards the kitchen while drying herself with the towel that was suppose to be for Alastor.
Alastor then went towards the table and sit and Xosa came also but then move her chair away from Alastor looking at him in distrust. Nunya then came with each plates with pie on it. She give the first plate to Xosa and lay it gently on the table in front of her.
"Here you go, Eat up sweety." Nunya say while smile a little at Xosa. "Yay, I will!" Xosa say happily then starts to eat. Nunya walk to Alastor to give him his plate but instead on putting it down gently she slap the plate on the table but not enough to make the food spill. "Eat." She say without looking at Alastor then went to get her a plate and sit next to Xosa.
Alastor look at the plate with surprise it doesn't look like pie but a lots of cheese for topping with potatoes , with some chop vegetables and ground beef. Nunya looks at him guesting what's he's thinking and sigh. "I know it seem weird at first but trust me it's not bad once you tasted it."
Alastor look at her with a untrusting look then she rolls her the say "Don't worry, I didn't put anything on your food. Beside I hate wasting good food." She then went back to eating. Alastor look at her smiling in a sinister smile. "Remember dear, If the food isn't good. Pop goes your arm.~"
Xosa stop her mid eating then quickly looking back and forth at Alastor and Mama while Nunya rolls her eyes unfazed by his threat continuing eating. Alastor scoop up some of the food on the fork then slowly put it in him mouth. To his surprised the food actually tastes pretty good. The taste like a warm homemade meals made with a mother's touch.
"My my, the food you make is actually taste good.~ Alastor say then take another bite. Xosa sigh with relief then smile at Alastor. "I know right!? Mama make the best food, I never taste anything this great before! I happy she's my Mama, I can eat many delicious food without being only in my birthday!" She happily say then went back to eating.
Alastor smile at the Xosa childlike behavior. "You right, I can tell by your expression she take great care of you. You a lucky orphan to meet her before your miserable fate." Xosa nods then continuing eating. Alastor notices the bear demon haven't say anything yet and look at her seeing Nunya looking away try to look angry while trying not to blush then mumbles a thank you.
After they done eating, Nunya starting to pick up the dishes but stop by Alastor. " Allow me.~" He say then snap his finger causing the dishes on the table disappear. Nunya look at Alastor annoyed about to tell him where the dishes is then suddenly hear noises then look back and see the dishes on the drying rack all clean and dry.
Nunya look at it surprised and look at Alastor. "Um,Thank you?" Alastor then smile widely "You're welcome dear, It's my thanks for giving me the nice meal. Xosa then came towards Alastor. "Wow, How you clean the dishes with a snap with your finger!? Can you teach me please!" Xosa looking at him with sparkling eyes and Alastor chuckles at her.
"Sorry my dear, A great magician doesn't give away his tricks.~" Xosa look at him with big begging eyes. "Oh pleeease, I promise I won't tell!" But she was stop by Nunya. "That's enough Xosa, Beside it's time for you to get ready for bed." Nunya say motherly and lightly push Xosa to walk away to get ready. Xosa sigh and nods. "Ok, Goodnight Alastor."
"Goodnight dear." Alastor said while both of them looking at Xosa walking down the small hallway towards the bathroom and went in. Nunya then look at him. "Thank you for being nice to Xosa, She have a hard time sleep when she stress, Especially she don't need to worry about me losing my arm....Right" She narrow her eyes look at Alastor.
Alastor smiles at her. "Don't worry dear, Your cook just save your arm." Nunya sigh in relief. She not may not be afraid of him but she don't the ideal of losing her arm.
"But that doesn't mean you not getting punish." Alastor say in a sinister tone. Nunya look at him annoyed like she not surprised by him saying that. "Grrr, You say I won't get punish if my food good!" Alastor smile at her widely "oh no no my dear, I mean I won't rip anything off your body. You still getting punish for throwing me."
Nunya growls at him Alastor continue "Don't worry I won't punish you now. I have to take time to think of a good punish for you, It may take a tomorrow maybe day or even weeks. For the mean time my dear servant..~" Alastor then walk towards her "Be afraid." Nunya raised her claws preparing to fight all of sudden Alastor disappear in front of her. She desperately looking around the room for him while she turns to look at the spot where she last saw him... She see red eyes looking at very close to hers with dials as pupils "Be very afraid." He say while loud radio static noises rumbles the apartment with redness around her then he disappear.
Nunya stand there silent starting where she last see Alastor. "Mama!?" Xosa yell out the bathroom in the tub "Is everything ok!? The whole bathroom shaking!" Nunya look at the bathroom door "I'm ok sweety it's just a little rumble" She say while her hands twitching. "Just continue finished your bath." Xosa then yell out a "Okay!"
Nunya glaring the spot Alastor is with eyes twitching . (So he think he can come to my life , threatening to hurt Xosa , trick me to become his servant and now try to scare me in my home after feeding him a good meal!?)
Then she smiles showing all her teeth in a very tick off look ("He wants entertainment, I GIVE HIM THE ENTERTAINMENT HE WANTS!!)
**BREAKING NEW**
"We're here live tell you the breaking news in hell! There's videos shown of Bear demon Nunya throwing the Radio demon!" Tom say then you can here audience gasping in the background then Katie respond "Crazy I'm I right!? I thought her she yelling at Valentino is the retarded thing now I think she have no brain at all in her fat head for she throwing one of the strongest overlords! Hahaha She is so dead!"
A Demon with a tv for a head stop whatever he doing looking at the television after hearing about the radio demon
"Right you are Katie! Here the recording video footage of Nunya throwing Alastor by the bystander who seen it all!"
The video starts showing Nunya talking to Alastor. "Oh this is crazy! I quickly pull out my phone after seeing the psycho bear woman calling out for the radio demon, This is crazy man!" The R.D(Means recording demon) said in the video then another voice in the video response to R.D "I know right!? Knowing her history it is scary what she might do, But it is more terrifying if she angers the radio demon this whole area be in chaos.
Then video show Nunya looking down blushing the video shakes a little. "W-wha, She blushing!? I never see her acting like this before, She acting like a school girl confessing her crush, I'm used to her looking angry this is more scary!" R.d say in a nervous tone then the Bystander respond "D*mn, Maybe the rumors of Alastor have the charm to woos ladies of their feet is true. If he can charm her anything possible!"
Then other bystander can be hear in the background of the video "Oh no, My Val×Nunya shipping club is in danger!"
"....Wait wha-" Before R.D about to turns the camera to see who saids that Nunya suddenly hugs Alastor's small waist with Alastor flinch at the contact but still keep a smiling face. "WHAT!?!?" R.d yell in disbelief. "She hugging the radio demon!? This is insane, Did she confess her lust for him and he accepts!?" The bystander say in shock. "Well looks like my shipping sinks in the bottom of a cold cruel sea ." Another bystander say in sadness.
Then they hear a loud "GO TO HEAVEN!!!!"
Then all of sudden the video show Nunya quickly lift Alastor off the ground then make a briefly fast spin with him in her arms then let him go causing him to went flying way up the sky with nonstop while making a inhuman scream with radio static sound slowing goes away the further he flown. Demon bystanders can be heard in the video gasping, shouting in disbelief , and saying we gonna die.
"Oh my Lucifer, D-did she just throw the radio demon?" R.d saying in high pitched voice." The video zooming at the red sky trying to see where Alastor thrown off to but he flew too far to been seen. "THANK YOU FOR SHOPPING AT MEAT MARKET HOPE TO SEE YOU NEVER!" Nunya was heard yelling without the video showing her since it too focus on the sky.
"Ight I'm gonna head out the area before the radio demon comes back rip us all apart." R.d say while the video quickly went down showing the ground while shaking rapidly from R.d running. "You right about that!" The bystander yell out in the background. Before the video ends another bystander can be hear "Yes, My ValxNunya shipping club is still floating!"
The tv demon look at television with eyes widen a little of the bear demon easily throwing the Radio demon then the news come back on with Katie "Such absolute madness am I right!? What I can't believe the Radio demon let that crazy woman hug him! Does he have a fat fetish as well!?" Katie laughs then Tom respond "Well I couldn't blame him, Did you see the video where somebody film her closely while she fighting demons? The fight causing her dress to lift up enough to show she had one thick a** under that dress!"
Katie stare at the camera smiling angrily then grab a pen using it to stab Tom under the desk causing him to fall over to the ground while screaming in pain without looking at him.
The Katie continue "In other news! We lucky have the video by another demon recording where the radio demon lands! Roll the clip! Stop screaming you little bit-" The video cuts to showing a pool party showing demons doing something that no parents want their child to see.
All of sudden a animalistic scream was heard out of nowhere then a big splash was heard causing some demons in the pool closeby scream in surprised. The video quickly turn to showing six succubus looking down the water at something then pop out is the radio demon with loud radio static smiling angrily while looking around to find someone then a radio screech was heard when he stop and face change to smiling horror when he realized he is surrounded by nude succubus.
The Succubus giggles while eyed him lustfully then all of them quickly grabbing him and the radio demon scream in horror. A laugh heard then the video turns to show in close by is Valentino lending in the head of the pool surrounded by nude demons. "Come on Al, Sit back and enjoy the rides!" He keep laughing then the video quickly turns to Alastor still screaming struggling with all of them trying to take his clothes off then he teleports away causing the succubus demons to groans in disappointment. "Aww, He was cute too" one of them say *Video ends*
The Tv demon laugh at the video of Alastor over reacting of see nude demons. Then he stop and thinking about that bear woman that cause this. (Maybe I should go meet this woman. Someone who brave enough to throw the radio demon is worth to meet.) He thinking while smirking.
---------------------------------------------
Finally I done! Thank you for spending your time reading it! This is one of the toughest story I ever write plus with my internet goes down randomly causing me to start over many times!😭
But still I have fun writing it, I hope you enjoy it since it is kinda my first fanfic story writing. Also here another fanart of Alastor and my ocs I made! Please don't repose!. 🎶🦌💥🐻💢
Tumblr media
25 notes · View notes
general-rusty · 4 years
Text
Hazbin AU Swap
Alastor the host to hell's 6th most popular radio station, out got of him apartment to see the ruins from his balcony. He clears his throat and started to sing.
Chasing Happiness ♪ At the end of the journey there's happiness ♪ ♪ And to find it, how often I’ve tried ♪ ♪ But my life is a race ♪ ♪ Just a wild goose chase ♪ ♪ And my hopes, they were just a lie♪ ♪ Why have I always been a failure ♪ ♪ What could the reason be ♪ ♪ I wonder if the world's to blame ♪ ♪ I wonder if it could be me ♪ ♪ I'm always looking for hope♪ ♪ searching them with my tears♪ ♪ My schemes are just like all my dreams ♪ ♪ Ending every year♪ ♪ Some fellows look and find the sunshine ♪ ♪ I always look and find the rain ♪ ♪ Some fellows make a winning sometime ♪ ♪ I never even make the game ♪ ♪ Believe me ♪ ♪ I'm always looking for hope♪ ♪ Waiting to find the happiness♪ ♪ In vain ♪
In the streets of Hell
A Demon falls from the sky and lands on the ground. "Oh, I’m alive. I’m alive!" He said
A motorcycle runs him over and stop to drop off a leatherjacket wearing Niffty. "Heh. Thanks for the fun time, hot stuff." A male raccoon demon said.
"Yeah, yeah, listen. Keep this discreet, hear me? I can’t let it get out I’m offering my services to creeps on the street. It was a quick cash grab, ya got it?" Niffty said
The Raccoon scoffs, "Whatever you say, slut!" He laughs
"Ouch, ooh, such an insult!  Let me know when you come up with something creative to call me you sack of poorly packaged horse shit. Tell the mrs' I said hi. Schnookums." Niffty quipped
The motorcycle rides off
Niffty brush the dust off of herself. A hooded demon grab the cash out of Niffty's hand "Yoink!"
"Hey!" Niffty shouted
"Up yours, midget!" The hooded demon shouted. A rock falls onto the hooded demon.
Niffty gasps, "Oh my god! My money! Dang it!" She shouted
Up on Ms Cherri's ship.
"HAHAHA! THOSE WEAK SINNERS WONT DARE TOUCH MY TERRITORY OF DESTRUCTION! A WISE DECISION, THE POWER OF MY EXPLOSIVES ARE UNMATCHED! NOW ONE, ONE COULD COMPARE TO THE LIKENESS OF I!" Ms Cherri laughed. Cherri now wears a ugly red pantsuit.
"Gee, that is pretty good, boss!" One of Cherri's cherryboi yuppie minions said
"Yeah! You really showed them what for!" another Cherryboi said
"I loved it when you blow them up them with your grenade launcher." said a Cherryboi
"I wish she’d shoot me with her grenade launcher." cried a Cherryboi
Another Cherryboy pat his Cherrybrother's back.
"IN A FEW DAYS ILL DESTROY THE ENTIRE EAST SIDE OF THE PENTAGRAM! HELL WILL BE RUINED! AND EVERY ONE WILL FEAR THE NAME OF MS. CH-" Ms Cherri yelled.
"SSSLUT!" A wise guy shouted.
"DAFUQ!? WHO SAID THAT! WHAT DID YOU SAID SHITTY EXCUSE FOR A FRUIT!? SPEAK THE FUCK UP!" Cherri threatened.
A explosive egg bot was YEETED through the windshield and explodes in front of everyone.
Pentious now in patches and his top hat is a now flat cap, jumps through the hole in the windshield, "You looking for a fight, filthy whore? why won't you take your little whore house nonsense of my territory before I sssmasssh it." a support beam falls on to a cherryboi. "more..." Pentious threatened.
"OH YOU WANNA GO GRANDPA!? I HOPE YOU LIKE GUNPOWDER BECAUSE THAT'S ALL YOU WILL GET!" Cherri shouted while her Cherrybois surround Pentious.
The morning report. Two demons were at the desk. A oppressive suited man with white combed to the side hair and a gasmask for a face. And a frail white blonde woman with red eyes. "Good afternoon! I’m Tommy Trench." Tommy announced.
"And I’m Kate Killjoy. Chaos at a pentagram city today as a turf war is raging on the east side. Between notable Queen pin Ms Cherri Bomb and self-proclaimed wise guy Pentious." Kate reported.
"That’s right Kate! After the recent extermination, many areas are now up for grabs! Demons all over Hell are already duking it out to gain new territory!" Tommy reported.
"Those two seem to really be going at it, huh?" Kate repiled.
"Looks like they’re fighting tooth and nail for that hot spot!" Tommy pulls a tooth and nail out of the mug, place them on the desk, and smash them with his fist.
"And I’d sure love to get my hot spot nailed by him." Kate giggles.
Tommy chuckles, "You sure are a big pussy whore, Kate. Or should I say-" Tommy pours coffee onto Kate's crotch -Burnt Pussy."
"Not again!" Kate cried. Kate curled up in pain.
"Coming up next, we have an exclusive interview with the host of Hell’s 6th most popular radio, who’s here to discuss his brand-new passion project! All that and more, after the break!" Tommy crushes the mug. "Suck it up you little bi-"
Backstage.
Alastor now a lot more tender and tweak like, and Husk which is wearing a withered red and black leisure suit. "Okay. You remember what to say?" Husk ask.
Alastor took a deep breath. "Okay! Let’s do this!"
"Look at me, and I’ll mouth it to you." Husk said.
"Come on, Husker! I know all of the currant slang terms! I just feel like we need to- I don’t know, make things sound more glamour and darb-" Alastor gasp, "Oh! What if I-"
"-sing a song about it?" Husk said.
Alastor chuckles, "You knew I was gonna say that."
"Because you're like a book. But please don’t fucking sing. This is serious." Husk stated
"Well you know, I’m better at expressing myself and my goals through song! It's my job after all." Alastor said.
"But this isn’t like the radio, Al." Husk
"Okay I’ll just have to resort to my impeccable improve skills." Alastor said with a southern bell accent.
Now with Tommy Trench.
Alastor walks up to Tommy. "Hi! I’m Alastor." holds out his hand.
"Tommy Trench." Tommy drops the cigarette and stomps on it. "I’d say it’s a pleasure to meet you, but that's a horseshit lie. You can put that away." Alastor pulls his hand back. "I don’t touch the mixes. I have standards."
"Yeah? How’s uh- how’s that working out for ya?" Alastor asked while a support beam falls down onto a crewman. "Can someone help me!" the crewman screamed in pain.
"Look, my time is money, so I’ll keep this short. We’re not here because we wanted you here, you’re here because Rodney couldn’t make it for his dating show."
Alastor looked past Tommy's shoulder to see Kate rolling her eyes.
"You might be some radio bigshot, but that doesn’t mean shit to me. I’m too rich and too influential to give a flying fuck about what some tux-wearing F list radio host wants to advertise." Tommy got into Alastor's face.
"But I-" Alastor stuttered.
"-So don’t get funny with me buddy, or I will fucking end you." Tommy threatened.
"And we’re live!" A crewman shouted.
Tommy ran back to his seat and Alastor walks to his seat. "Welcome back! So, Alex-" Alastor interrupts, "It’s Alastor."
"Whatever. Tell us about this new passion project you’ve been insistently pestering our news station about!" Tommy grips the handgun in his jacket.
Alastor clears his throat, "As most of you know, I have been here in Hell since 1933, and if you remember life wasn't easy back then, but as you can see life is a lot worse here than it was there. I always tried to see the good in everything around me. Hell is my home, and you are my people. We-" Tommy shoots a bug with that handgun. Blood splashes onto Alastor's face. "We just went through another extermination. We lost so many souls, and it breaks my heart to see my people being slaughtered every year. No one is even given a chance! I can’t stand idly by while the place I live is subjected to such violence! So, I’ve been thinking. Isn’t there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through… redemption? Well I think yes. So that’s what this project aims to achieve! Ladies and gentlemen, I’m opening the first of its kind! A hotel that rehabilitates sinners!" Alastor announce.
...
"Y’know? ‘Cause hotels are for people passing through… temporarily."
In a dive bar in the hick part of hell. A bear demon laughes, "Is this guy for real? He thinks, you hear what this city boy thinks? he-' short laugh "-Oh, he’s nuts."
The camera man spoke up. "Stupid nig-"
Husk uppercuts the camera man.
"Look, every single one of you has something good deep down inside. I know you do. Maybe I’m not getting through to you." Alastor said
Husk sighs "Oh no."
Alastor snaps his fingers to bring his jazz band in.
♪ We have a dream ♪ ♪ We wish to tell ♪ ♪ And it’s just ball ♪ ♪ ‘Cause you’re one of a kind ♪ ♪ A charming demon belle! ♪ ♪ Now let’s give these burning fools a place to dwell ♪ ♪ (Take it, boys!) ♪ ♪ (Boo!) ♪ ♪ Inside of every demon is a cause ♪ ♪ We’ll dress ‘em up and give them a smile! ♪ ♪ (With a smile!) ♪ ♪ And we’ll chlorinate this cesspool ♪ ♪ With some old redemption flair ♪ ♪ And show these guys some proper class and style! ♪ ♪ (What’s in style?) ♪ ♪ (Oh!) ♪ ♪ Here below the ground ♪ ♪ I’m sure your plan is sound!  ♪ ♪ They’ll spend a little time ♪ ♪ Down at this Happy Ho-- ♪
Random demon: "Shut the fuck up! That is shit!"
Everyone laughs uncontrollably.
"What in the nine circles makes you think a single denizen of Hell would give two shits about becoming a better person? You have no proof that this little experiment even works! You want people to be good just… because?" Tommy and Kate laughs.
"Well, we have a patron already who believes in our cause, and she’s shown incredible progress!" Alastor shouted
"Oh? And who might that be?" Tommy asked.
"Oh, just someone named… Niffty." Alastor replied.
"The porn star?" Kate asked.
Tommy slowly turns around pointing that handgun at Kate. "You fucking would, Kate." Tommy turns back around. "In any case, that’s not even an accomplishment. I’m sure you can get that hooker to do anything with enough booger sugar and lube."
"Oh, I beg to differ. She’s been behaved, clean, and out of trouble for 2 weeks now." Alastor replied.
"Breaking news!" Shouted a crewman
Tommy pushed Alastor away. "We are receiving word that a new player has entered the ongoing turf war! Let’s go to the live feed!"
Shows Niffty kicking Cherryboi ass.
"Di Mi!." Alastor whispered.
"Dee Me indeed! It looks like the one who just joined the battle is none other than-" gasp "-porn actress Niffty! What a juicy coincidence! You must feel really stupid right now." Tommy said
Tommy and Kate laugh. "Ratings!"
Alastor gasped, "Don’t look at this!" He tried to hid the window on the greenscreen.
"Well, it sure looks like your little project is dead on arrival. Tell us, how does it feel to be such a total failure?" Tommy asked.
"Yeah? Well- how does it feel that I got your pen, huh? Dick?!" Alastor shouted.
Tommy went silent.
Alastor nervously laughs, "Sorry." Put the pen back.
Kate runs away while Tommy got the flamethrower
Back in the streets
"Hey thanks for the backup, Niffts!" Pentious shouted.
"You kiddin'? This is the best action I've seen in ages!" Niffty replied.
Pentious throws a egg bomb. "Where have you been anyways? I thought you died or something."
"Oh I wish! I've been staying at this dirty hotel on the other side of town. Some guys let me stay rent free if I play nice His words, not mine. These assholes are no fun! I’ve been clean for two weeks!" Niffty answered.
"Holy crap." Pentious replied.
"Well, sorta clean. As clean as you can get with a shitload of Bolivian marching powder." Niffty replied.
Cherri whips and ties Niffty up in a vine.
"Oh, harder mommy!" Niffty moaned.
Cherri gasp, "Daughter?!"
Niffty raise the brow in a "Da fuck?" way.
"You douches have no style! In war, the side remembered is the side with the most style." Cherri pop her collar up.
"Or the side that ain’t 6 feet under." Pentious replied.
"Speaking of style, what's up with the colors, it's red this and red that. Is it that time of the month?" Pentious quipped.
"Oh, well, that’s none of your goddamn business, now is it?" Cherri shouted.
"Oh yeah we're not suppose to talk about that." Niffty quipped.
"I’m going to blow you to bits!" Cherri threatened.
"Hm! Kinky!" Niffty quipped.
"Oh, not like that! creep!" Cherri replied.
Cherriyboi shoots at Niffty with a vine net gun.
"Not so cocky now, are we?" Cherri threatened.
"Y’know, you really gotta watch what comes out of your mouth. I’ve been making these sex jokes the whole-" Cherri pulls out a smg "-TIME! And it’s obvious ya ain’t catchin’ on-" Niffty kicks Cherri, takes her gun and shoots at the Cherryboi. "-I mean, it’s just SAD!
"So think you’re gonna get in a lot of trouble for this?" Pentious asked.
"Eh, what’s one little brawl gonna cause?" Niffty asked.
Back in the newsroom.
Alastor and Tommy are going at it fisticuffs, while the flamethrower is blowing fire to the right of the desk.
Kate runs into view of the camera while on fire. "Why won’t anyone help me?!" She screams.
Back in the streets. "Glad ya haven’t changed. You know you’re my favorite gal to party with!" Pentious shouted.
"You know it, you slimy snake. You ready to finish this?" Niffty asked.
"Hell yeah, baby." Pentious answered.
Niffty, Pentious, Ms Cherri, CherryBois, Alastor, Tommy, and Kate yelling in a 4 screen split.
In the Limo driving to the hotel Niffty was playing with the window
Husk carving a wooden steak and giving Niffty the death stare.
Niffty looks up to Husk, "What?"
"What? What?! What were you fucking doing?!" Husk shouted.
Niffty sighs, "Look I owed my snake buddy a solid! Isn’t that a “redeeming quality"? Helping pals with stuff?" Niffty shouted.
"Not with turf wars that result in genocide!" Husk shouted.
"Eh, you win some, you lose a few hundred, plus didn't you caused a Genocide." Niffty snickers.
Husk throws the wooden steak at Niffty which pierced throw the window.
"Aw come on, I had to! My credibility was on the line-" Niffty sighs "-I mean, what kind of reputation would I have if people found out I was trying to go clean? It just throws out my entire persona."
"Your credibility? What about the hotel? Your little stunt made us look like fucking clowns!" Husk shouted.
"No no no, hon. Clowns are funny! I made you look… uh, sad! And pathetic! Like an orphan, with no arms, or legs… Uh… oh, with progeria! Great! Now I’m bummed thinking about it! This thing have any liquor?" Niffty asked.
"Can you please just try to take this seriously?" Husk asked.
"Fine, I’ll try, just don’t bitch to your mother while you're fucking her." Niffty quipped.
"What was that you trying to be?" Husk got up and pulled out his knife.
"Whatever pisses you off the most. Is there seriously no liquor in here?!" Niffty shouted.
"I’m gonna kill her." Husk sat back down.
"Too late, hon. Wait, would that make me double dead? And where exactly do I go, to double Hell? Sorry, you’re stuck with me, bitch. Get used to it." Niffty laughs.
"Fucking bitch!" Husk mumbled.
"Listen, who cares if some jagoffs got hurt? Most of them are ugly freaks. Look around! Got a bunch of fuckin’ harlequin babies down here." Niffty said.
"You’re one to talk." Husk quipped.
"Hey! This body is flawless! Everyone wants some of me, and I’ve got the creepy fan letters to prove it!" Niffty pulls out a letter with stains.
"That was really not swell y’know, Niffty" Alastor said.
"Not Sweel?! After that trainwreck, there is no way anyone is gonna wanna stay at the hotel. All thanks to you and your selfish bullshit!" Husk shouted.
"Does that mean I don’t have a free room anymore?" Niffty asked.
Husk pulls the knife out again.
"Ah, well, shucks." Niffty snaps.
"Hey, come on, we don’t know if things are over yet. Try to relax, Husker. It’ll be okay!" Alastor reassured.
At the Happy Hotel
The three open the door. Husk sat down on to the couch to look at his hands, his mind goes back to the war.
Niffty went to the fridge to get a beer. "It’s probably a good idea to get some actual food in this place. Y’know, to feed all the wayward souls ya got in here." Niffty laughed, but then it became nervous laughter, and then she just stops.
Alastor went out to talk to his boss. "Hey Boss. Um, I know I keep calling, and you must want that kale paid back. But um, the interview isn't sitting pretty and... I don’t know if I’m going to make a difference. I don’t know what I’m doing. I could really use some advice, Boss. I think you're right about me. A-anyway, I’ll stop talking before this gets long." Alastor went back in.
A knock to the tune of Come On Eileen was on the door.
Alastor opens the door to see Charlie in her demon form.
"Hell-"
Alastor slams the door, and then open it again to see if he just saw that.
-o."
Alastor slams the door again. "Hey Husker?
"What?!" Husk asked.
"The Musical Demon is at the door!" Alastor nervously answered.
"Holy shit what?!" Husk drops the knife.
"Uh, who?" Niffty asked
"What should I do?" Alastor asked.
"Well, don’t let that bitch in!" Husk shouted
Alastor slowly opens the door.
"May I speak now?" Charlie asked.
"You may-" Alastor said.
"Charlie, pleasure to be meeting you, sweetheart, quite a pleasure. Excuse my visit, but I saw your riot on news and I just couldn’t resist. What a performance! Why, I haven’t been that entertained since the Great White show of 2003. Ah so many bodies." Charlie introduced
"Stop right there!" Husk pointed a M16 at Charlie. "I know your game. And I’m not gonna let you hurt anyone here, you spunky, quirky, musical harlot!" Husk threatened.
Charlie laughs slightly, "Hon, if I wanted to hurt anyone here... I would have done so already...." spooky demonic stuff pops up and then goes away. "No, I’m here because I want to help!"
"Say what now?" Alastor asked.
"Help!" Charlie exclaimed.
"Um, you want to help?" Alastor asked.
"With this ridiculous thing you’re trying to do! This hotel! I want to help you run it." Charlie exclaimed.
"Uh… why?" Alastor asked.
Charlie laughs, "Why does anyone do anything? Sheer, absolute boredom! I’ve lacked inspiration for decades! My work became mundane, lacking focus, aimless! I’ve come to crave a new form of entertainment!"
"Does getting into a fist fight with a upstage reporter count as entertainment?" Alastor asked.
Charlie laughs, "Absolutely, it's reality.  After all, the world is a stage! And the stage is a world of entertainment!"
"So, does this mean that you think it’s possible to rehabilitate a demon?" Alastor asked.
Charlie laughs, "Ha no. That’s wacky nonsense! Redemption, oh the non-existent humanity! Nononono, I don’t think there’s anything left that could save such loathsome sinners! The chance given was the life they lived before; the punishment is this! There is no undoing what is done!"
"So then, why do you want to help me if you don’t believe in my cause?" Alastor asked.
"Consider it an investment in ongoing entertainment for myself! I want to watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment! Only to repeatedly trip and tumble down to the fiery pit of failure." Charlie stated.
"Right?" Alastor nervously asked.
"Yes indeedy! I see big things coming your way, and who better to help than I…" Charlie exclaimed.
With Husk and Niffty.
"Ah, so uh, what’s the deal with Smiles over there?" Niffty asked.
"Wait, you’ve never heard of her before? You’ve been here longer than me!" Husk shouted.
"Only for a decade." Niffty replied.
"The Musical Demon, one of the most powerful fuckers Hell has ever seen?" Husk stated.
"Eh, not big on politics." Niffty answered.
"Some fuckin' time ago, Charlie was let out of Lucifer's castle she rampaged the fuck out of everything and then she started podcasting her carnage through fucking songs people started calling her, the music demon.. That kind of raw power had never been harnessed by a mortal soul before. Strange song and dense numbers would play on the radio paired with terrifying screams and cries for help. She'd force victims to join in and those who wouldn't or couldn't got the worst of it. Sinners started calling her the Musical Demon. (How fucking original!) Many have speculated what unimaginable force enabled her to rival our world’s most ancient and destructive evils. But one thing’s for sure: She’s an unpredictable source of danger, a wicked spirit of mystery, and a violent monster of chaos the likes of which we can’t risk getting involved with unless we want to end up erased." Husk annoyingly exclaims.
"Bash ears much?" Niffty silently laughs, "She looks like a cinnamon roll princess!"
"Well, I don’t trust her!" Husk spat.
"To be fair, do you trust anyone?" Niffty asked. "Anyone."
Husk went to Alastor.
"Al, man, listen to me. You can’t believe this girl! She isn’t just a happy face! She’s a dealmaker, pure evil! She's Lucifer's daughter! She can’t be redeemed! And is most likely looking for a way to destroy everything we’re trying to do. And we don't want that." Husk stated.
"I know she’s bad, and I know she probably doesn’t wanna change, but the whole point of this is to give people a chance! To have faith things will be better! How can I turn someone away? I can’t.  It goes against everything I’m trying to do. Everything I believe in. I would be like them back then. Just trust me. I can take care of myself." Alastor stated.
"Alastor, whatever you do, do not make a deal with him!" Shouted.
"Don’t worry, I picked up one thing from them. “Ya don’t take shit from rich folk!”  Okay, so… Charlotte. You’re sketchy, and you clearly see what I’m trying to do here is a joke. But I don’t. I think everyone deserves a chance to prove they can be better. So, I’m taking your offer to help. On the condition that there be no tricks or voodoo strings attached." Alastor nervously said.
"So it’s a deal then?" Charlie asked.
Alastor takes a gulp before he shakes her burning hot hands. Her hand burns Alastor's hand like a hot stove. Alastor cries in pain.
Charlie let go of Alastor hand and went to Husk.
Alastor went to the fridge to get something to cool his hand.
"Smile, my boy! You know you’re never fully dressed without one!" Charlie stated. "So where is your hotel staff?" She asked.
"Uh, well…" Alastor points to Husk and Niffty with his good hand.
Husk growls.
"Oh ho ho ho, you’re going to need more than that." Charlie stated.
"And what can you do you quirky cutie?" Charlie asked Niffty.
"I can finger you to heaven." Niffty replied.
"Maybe not..." Charlie said.
"Your loss." Niffty stated.
"Well this just won’t do! I suppose I can cash in a few favors to liven things up!" Charlie snaps, which cleans the fireplace and light up a fire in it. Charlie then pulled out a tall and dark demon from the fireplace. Charlie then shake it a little to get rid of the soot which reveals our white and pink Spider Boi Angel Dust.
"This tall friend is Angel!" Charlie said.
"Hello, my name is angel, it been along time since I saw any guy... IS ANYONE HERE GAY!? sorry, that was rude... OH MY! this place is disgusting, it really need the fabulous touch, which is weird cause I'm sure at least one of you is gay..." Angel went all around the room with his 6 arms cleaning and remodeling everything.
Charlie snaps again.
A gray female demon was at a bar talking to a male demon, "Okay that will be $50 for a hand- wohhhhhh" All kinds of demonic shit goes around Vaggie "¿Que demonios?" Vaggie notices Charlie, "YOU!"
"Veggie sweat heart glad you could make it!" Charlie exclaims and then hugs
"Don't you veggie me! I was working!" Vaggie pushed Charlie away.
"Good to see you to!" Charlie laughed
"What do you want?" Vaggie asked.
"Well sweaty I'm doing some charity work and I took it upon my self to volunteer your Service!" Charlie answered.
"Are you joking!?" Vaggie asked.
"No, I don't think so! I thought you could be the new face of this fine establishment!"  Charlie points to a pole. "With your fine smile and "past experience" this job was made for you!" Charlie stated.
"IM AINT DOING NO CHAIRTY WORK DO I LOOK LIKE SOME KIND OF A FUCKING JOKE!?" Vaggie shouted.
"Maybe, but don't worry,I can make it more rewarding, if you wish." Charlie projects all of the cute good times they had back then.
"What!? you can think you can buy me with a wink and some good memories!? Well you can!" Vaggie got up to the stage
"Hey hey, heyheyhey! NO! No pole dancing we're meant to be a place that discourages sin! Not some kind of… casino, brothel, man-cave-" Husk ranted.
Niffty jumps on Husk. "Shut up! Shut! Up! We are keeping this." Niffty pointed to Vaggie. "Hey." Niffty flirted to Vaggie
"¡Vete a la mierda!" Vaggie said.
"Sounds sexy." Niffty flirted.
Alastor went up the the stage, "Hello there my scantily dressed friend! Welcome to this fine or at least with your help soon to be fine hotel!" Alastor introduced himself.
"I lost the ability to love years ago, so unless you got cash you're not worth my time." Vaggie stated.
"So, what do you think?" Charlie asked.
"This is the Bees Knees!" Alastor bellowed.
"It’s… fine." Husk stated.
Charlie went in for a hug with Alastor and Husk, "This is going to be very fun!" Charlie clears her throat and push Husk away. ♪ You have a dream ♪ ♪ You wish to tell ♪ ♪ And it’s just laughable ♪ ♪ But hey sir, what the hell! ♪ ♪ ‘Cause you’re one of a kind ♪ ♪ A charming pal! ♪ ♪ Now let’s give these burning fools a place to dwell ♪ ♪ Inside of every demon is a waste ♪ ♪ But we’ll dress ‘em up for now with just a smile! ♪ ♪ And we’ll chlorinate this cesspool ♪ ♪ With some old redemption flair ♪ ♪ And show these simpletons some proper class and style! ♪ ♪ Here below the ground ♪ ♪ I’m sure your plan is sound!  ♪ ♪ They’ll spend a little time ♪ ♪ Down at this Hazbin Ho-- ♪
A explosion outside blast the door off and hit Angel.
Everyone walked out to see what was happening
"Ha! Well well well, look who it is harboring the musical freak! We meet yet again, Charlie!" Cherri shouted.
"Do I know you?" Charlie asked.
"Oh, yes you do! And this time, I have the element of- surprise!" Cherri maniacal laughs "I’m so evil!"
Charlie snaps to bring up her goat goons to destroy the ship.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa whoa!" Cherri started to scream as the goats started to destroy her ship and murder her Cherrybois.
Two of the goats grab Cherri and threw her at the wall. "Oh, that hurt!" Cherri screams.
The Goats took control of the ship and pilot it into the cracks where they came from.
The ship explodes when it got into the crack.
"Well I’m starved! Who wants some cake? My father once showed me a wonderful recipe for cake! In fact, they named it after him! You could say the kick was right out of Hell! Yes sir, this is the start of some real changes down here!" Charlie laughes
"The show starts! Now... Stay tuned." Charlie snaps changing the sign from, "Happy." to "Hazbin."
248 notes · View notes
oiralinsanity · 4 years
Text
The Blood Drop of Subcon
Part 6
The Snatcher sat in his lounger reading one of his law books, pausing every now and then to take a sense of the time. The kid with the hat had already left some time ago to her ship, leaving Subcon Forest and its ruler some peace and quiet.
Well, somewhat. Tonight was permanently different than usual. This time, he had more to deal with than the occasional trespasser. He glanced at the newest member of the forest.
Moonjumper rocked in his hand-crafted hanging chair, still reading that book he had picked out earlier, paying no attention to the world at the moment due to the fact that this was the first time he had been a part of society in centuries. The sudden change in location placed some stress on the moon-faced spirit, and he needed some time to collect himself.
The Snatcher paused once again to take a sense of time, and then proceeded to leave his spot.
"Is there something wrong, my shadow friend?" Moonjumper spoke up, taking notice to the sudden movements around him. "You've been acting strangely for a while now."
"Ah, yes." The Snatcher answered. "It's midnight right now. That's usually when I go out and patrol my forest for trespassers and potential threats."
"And how do you usually deal with trespassers when you find them?" Moonjumper asked, summoning a red string from his finger to act as his bookmark.
"Ooh, the usual." The Snatcher said in a sing-song tone. "I set up a trap and lead them into it. When they set it off, a wall of darkness and vines will surround them and I pop out of the ground, laughing before screaming 'Fool' to scare them. I belittle them for falling into my trap before..."
The Snatcher summoned a piece of paper and a feather pen in front of Moonjumper, causing him to slightly jump in shock. "I tell them that they just got the chance of a lifetime, and that they can leave this forest alive by signing a contract and doing some jobs for me, while I hold their soul as collateral in the off chance they attempt to bail from their contractual obligations." The Snatcher chuckled. "It could be really simple, such as delivering mail to my minions, or-"
"Mail?" Moonjumper interrupted his shadow, confused by his mail comment. "Your minions still get mail?"
"Well, no." The Snatcher explained. "I actually sneak into some mailboxes and steal some of the mail, old habits die hard. It helps make my minions feel special."
"Now, back to what I was saying before you rudely interrupted me." The Snatcher coldly expressed. "It could be as simple as delivering mail to my minions, or as hard as cleaning out the well. Only thing harder than that would be sneaking into Vanessa's Manor to steal something, which only one person has managed to complete that task."
"And that was?" Moonjumper asked. To hear that only one person had managed to survive Vanessa in her own Manor and steal something from her at the same time obviously meant they had to have been very powerful to have completed such a task.
"It was that nuisance of an alien kid, Moonjumper." Snatcher groaned. "The same one who managed to defeat me twice."
Or they were small and crafty enough in sneaking past her like a little thief.
"Then, once the obligations has been fulfilled and the servant is no longer of any use to me..." The Snatcher made a loud popping sound. "Off goes their heads! I can get stuff done around the forest with no effort on my part and a free meal as well!!"
"But you made a contract with them," Moonjumper recalled. "And anytime a spirit, like you or I for example, draws up a contract with someone, the spirit is bound to following said terms and conditions of the deal once it's signed, no matter what."
"Look at the signature line and flip it over..." The Snatcher commanded his old body. He watched as Moonjumper did as he was told, and listened as the moon-faced spirit read aloud the printing on the back.
"I hereby totally agree to do this Snatcher dude's dirty work." Moonjumper spoke. "And also absolve him of all injuries I will most likely sustain from this work. Also, I'll give up my soul. No take-"
The Snatcher watched as Moonjumper began to spiral into a fit of giggles from reading what the last line had stated.
"No takey backsies." Moonjumper barely managed to let out inbetween his giggling fit. "Snatcher, are you serious with this? You managed to craft a contract that can allow a spirit to potentially bypass the legal bindings of a contract, and you decide to write something extremely childish!?"
"Well when you get your own legal contracts, you decide what you want to put on the back of it!!" The Snatcher bickered as he summoned the contract and the feather pen back into his pocket dimension. "Besides, there may have been one or two people whose souls weren't eaten in the end."
"Really?" Moonjumper asked as the two began to leave the Hollowed Tree. "Such as...?"
"Well, one person that instantly comes to mind was this witch who I had signed a contract with about five centuries ago." The Snatcher brought up. "She knew a powerful Dark Spirit when she saw one, and convinced me to become her Patron. She's the one who brews the explosive liquids I use in battle sometimes."
"The same ones used against you?" Moonjumper spoke, bringing up their previous conversation on the space ship.
"Regrettably." The Snatcher shrugged. "She told me it wasn't a good idea to use blue liquids as one of my attacks when it's one of my major weaknesses. So she had every right to laugh at me when I came to her drenched in it."
The duo fell quiet as they patrolled around Subcon Forest, keeping an eye out for any potential trespassers.
~~~
The Snatcher held his hand up, stopping his companion in his tracks.
"Why are we stopping?" Moonjumper whispered to the shadow as he pointed ahead, in which Moonjumper peered towards.
Ahead of the spirits were two balding men in blue suits, both top heavy and scared of their current surroundings.
"Mafia Goons." The Snatcher growled softly, revealing who the strange men were. "They're strong, but extremely dumb and cowardly. And they always seem to find their way here for some odd reason, despite living on an island."
"My usual meal as well." He added. "Prepare to watch and learn the hunt."
The Snatcher waved his fingers at the ground ahead of the goons, summoning a circle of shadow thorns to lie in wait, hoping to be triggered. He then pulled Moonjumper's shoulder down low to the ground so that his bright outfit would not be spotted against the dreary backdrop.
They watched as the two goons stumbled about in the forest, having no clear sense of their surroundings or what dangers lied ahead, able to hear them more clearly as they got closer to the spirits' position.
"Mafia no like dark, spooky forest." One of them spoke to the other. "Mafia have no idea how Mafia even got here."
"Mafia must find shelter." His comrade spoke, failing to notice the trap now just feet away from them. "Mafia have seen red spot on moon. Mafia knows this bad time to be out in open."
One of the Mafia Goons stepped completely into the shadow trap and sprung it, scaring his comrade. A shadowy wall, palpable to the touch, grew around the trapped goon as his frightened comrade ran off screaming.
The Mafia Goon trapped in a world of shadows, looking around for an ever-dwindling hope of an exit out of his predicament, barely noticed that one of the shadows was increasing in size.
"AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!" The loud laughter that echoed throughout the air had already frightened the Goon into submission. "FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!! YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER IDIOT, YOU BLEW IT FOR YOURSELF!!"
Meanwhile, the Mafia Goon, who managed to turn tail and run off, was jumping and ducking through the underbrush of the dark forest. After watching his comrade get trapped by the dark spirit of the forest, the Goon now just wanted to go to his home on Mafia Island, jump straight under his bed covers, and call in sick for the next week.
Suddenly, his ankle got caught on something and he tripped, flying face first into the murky dirt and ruined his blue suit.
The Mafia Goon picked himself off the ground. "What caused Mafia to trip?" He spoke with anger and confusion in his voice. "Things that trip Mafia must pay for its crimes!" He bellowed as he scanned the ground, only to be frightened by the sight of what had tripped him.
A red string, glowing with mysterious dark powers, similar to the horrible tales told to him as a young boy growing up. He had to get out of here quickly, as he did not want to be lifted towards the moon.
Suddenly, red strings shot out from above and wrapped itself around the Mafia's legs, turning his fears into reality. The strings then tighten and lifted him up into the air, smacking his head on the ground in the process.
Dazed from the bump, it took the Goon a moment to regain his senses, although he immediately regretted getting them back the moment he saw what was in front of him.
"Well, well, well," The floating body in red spoke to the Goon, swaying its lower half in the movement towards him. "What do we have here? A trespasser in the woods?"
"Leave Mafia alone!" The Goon shouted at the being, swinging his fists at it in an attempt to maintain a safe distance. "Mafia will show you not to mess with-"
"Oh hoho!" The spirit laughed, interrupting the Goon. "You really think I would be deterred by your empty threats? I've seen many like you before, and let me tell you..."
Red strings began to grow from the spirit's fingertips, confirming the Goon's worst fears for the last time.
"They've all broken down to fear sooner or later." The spirit spoke sadistically before thrusting his red strings towards the now screaming Goon.
***
The Snatcher was finished making a contract with the Goon he had managed to trap, and now had his soul for later consumption. Now all he had to deal with was the second Goon, who had managed to escape with his life.
"Moonjumper!" The Snatcher shouted to his bodied companion. "Where did that other fool go?"
All The Snatcher met to his question was silence, much to his confusion. That's odd. The Snatcher thought. I could have sworn I told him to stay put.
A distant scream rang out in the forest, catching The Snatcher's attention. That sounded like one of the Mafia's! He thought as he flew towards its source.
He kinda wished he hadn't though, not after what he saw when he arrived on the scene.
"MOONJUMPER, WHAT THE FUCK!?" The Snatcher screamed at his bodied counterpart, who had his strings wrapped around and piercing what looked to be a semi-husk of the second Mafia Goon.
Moonjumper looked at The Snatcher with discontent. "I'm feeding." He spoke in a monotone voice. "How else would I have survived for all this time?"
"It also appears that I already made a bit of a name for myself." Moonjumper added in. "They spoke in fear of my distress signal. Must be from all the years I had to fish someone from this planet up for a meal."
"He was mine!" The Snatcher spoke, getting up close to Moonjumper's face. "Any trespassers in my forest, my victims! That is the rule of this territory!"
"And yet you were preoccupied with another." Moonjumper brought up, now reeling in his strings. "Besides, I just finished with my meal."
The Snatcher looked to where the Mafia Goon's husk would have been to find absolutely nothing. No body, no clothing. No trace of there ever being a second Goon. "I make sure to consume every last part of my meal to ensure a full stomach." Moonjumper explained. "Which means you don't have a body to dispose of or a mess to pick up. Like they were never there at all."
The Snatcher looked at Moonjumper in disgust. The Goon was still suppose to be his victim, according to his rules. Moonjumper would have to be punished according to the-
The Snatcher smacked himself upside the head. He forgot to make Moonjumper sign any sort of contract when he had the chance, which meant he couldn't punished the moom-faced spirit for stealing his meal.
"God dammit." The Snatcher mumbled under his breath before turning towards Moonjumper. "When's your next feeding, a year?"
"I'm not sure," Moonjumper answered. "Considering that time is strange in that white hell, I don't know how long my hunger will be satiated for."
"If you are not down with your duties, I will see you back at the tree." Moonjumper spoke as he left The Snatcher by himself, allowing the shadow to ponder over how to make living with a second dark spirit possible.
Beginning/Previous/Here/Soon
23 notes · View notes
Text
Chapter 2
Meanwhile, Across Town by George deValier
Chapter saved by ocean-babyblues ♥
Francis threw open the door and glared at Arthur and Alfred standing in the dimly lit hall. Alfred waved cheerfully. "Hello!"
"I can think of no other reason for you two to be standing at my door at two am than that you want to have sex with me. Very well, I shall get the whipped cream."
Arthur narrowed his eyes and followed Francis into the richly decorated loft apartment. "Don't be ridiculous, you arrogant frog. We're here for fashion advice."
"Of course, why else would you turn up at my apartment at this time of night." Francis wore a fluffy red trimmed sleeping gown, red fluffy slippers, and his hair was held back by a red fluffy sleeping mask. He looked like a particularly furry raccoon. "Are you sure you don't want to have sex with me?"
"No!"
"No you don't want to have sex with me, or no you're not sure?" Francis led them into the kitchen and threw open the fridge.
Arthur thought for a moment. "The first one."
"Ah. So no whipped cream?" asked Francis, waving the can in the air.
"I'll have some whipped cream," said Alfred eagerly. Arthur blinked at him and he shrugged. "I'm hungry."
"Here," said Francis, throwing the can to Alfred.
"Ooh, vanilla flavoured." Alfred put the nozzle in his mouth and pressed it down. Arthur shook his head and looked away. Maybe this was not such a good plan after all. But then, what choice did he have? Another aspiring superhero was not likely to appear in front of him any time soon.
"So, Arthur," said Francis, "What fashion advice is so important that it can not wait until morning? I already told you, that tie is horrible."
Arthur pointedly ignored that. "Francis, meet, uh, America-man. The newest protector of liberty and justice in our fair city."
Francis looked around the room. "Huh? Where? Who?"
Alfred waved again. "Me," he said through a mouthful of cream.
Francis's mouth fell open. "The copy boy?"
"Of course," said Arthur. "Did you not notice the cape?"
"I thought that was for the sex!"
"There is no sex, Francis. There never has been sex, there never will be sex… no sex!"
Francis sighed dramatically. "Oh, my wounded heart." Arthur resisted the urge to kick him. "Very well, then, let us see what we have here." Francis slowly circled Alfred, looking him up and down, his eyebrow raised appraisingly. Alfred eyed him nervously. "Not bad, not bad… we have something to work with here. Cute butt." Francis wagged his eyebrows at Arthur, who gritted his teeth and widened his eyes warningly.
Alfred twisted his neck to look down at the aforementioned body part. "Do you think? You know, I've been wondering if maybe it's been getting a little flabby lately…"
"You, shush. Now, this." Francis gestured over Alfred's garish outfit. "This underwear over the tights business." Francis shook his head and wagged a finger before Alfred's wide eyes. "No, no, no, my dear. It's so tragically sixties. Nowadays we need something more… streamlined. Subtle. Classy." He tilted his head, took a step back and peered thoughtfully. "I do like the colour scheme, however. Maybe add a big letter 'A' on the chest. America-man, was it?" Alfred nodded eagerly and Francis folded his arms and tapped his chin. "Hmm. No. How about just…" Francis spread his fingers and waved his hand in an arc, whispering dramatically, "America!"
Alfred's eyes lit up and he gasped, staring at the wall with an awestruck expression. "I love it!"
"Of course you do. Now, I'm assuming you have some sort of superpower…" Francis left the sentence hanging.
"Alfred." Arthur jerked his head towards Francis' refrigerator. "Go pick up the fridge." Alfred did so. Francis looked impressed.
"Very nice. One moment, please." Francis took Arthur by the arm and led him into the living room, just out of Alfred's earshot. He spoke quietly. "So I am assuming this is your brilliant story, no?"
Arthur smiled grimly. "Of course. I have a villain. I have a hero. Add a dash of scandal, some unsubstantiated rumours, a few public battles, mix, and serve. Et voila… to borrow a phrase."
Francis raised an eyebrow. "Scandal? Unsubstantiated rumours?"
"I know Beilschmidt thinks The Perfume Villain is a non-story, but after quite a bit of research, I have to disagree. The nerve paralysing perfume he uses has been seen before. The places he is targeting have all been targeted in the past. And the fact that he is stealing jewellery, of all things. Everything points to one conclusion. Our villain used to work for the Sunflower Tsar."
Francis furrowed his brow, looked away as though thinking. "Yes. Of course…"
"And if he is breaking back into the business on his own, then the question must be asked… what of the other of the Tsar's minions? Hackzor, Lietuva, little Harlequin… they all went into hiding after the end of the Posse. And what of the Dragon Emperor? After the Tsar was imprisoned, the Emperor simply disappeared without a trace. Where is he now?"
"If you write of these rumours, you are only going to succeed in causing a panic."
Arthur smirked. "And selling a lot of newspapers. But first thing is first. You need to help me turn America into the public's new golden boy."
Francis' expression grew calculating, his eyes and jaw hardening. "I am guessing that none of this is actually about Alfred, is it? Nothing to do with just wanting to give a nice, friendly kid a leg up in this tough city."
Arthur felt a brief stab of guilt. Alfred was so good, so trusting. And Arthur had not even thanked him for rescuing him in the alley earlier… Arthur shook the feeling away. He only had one thing to worry about here – how to get his career back on track. "Look, Alfred wants to be a superhero. I'm helping him achieve his goal."
"For your own benefit."
Arthur burned with guilty rage. "Look, Francis, are you going to help me or not?"
Francis glared a moment more before finally waving a hand dramatically. "Of course I am going to help you. How can I resist creating couture for such a specimen. When do you want the outfit by?"
"As soon as possible. I'm getting America on the front cover of Sunday's paper."
"The outfit will be ready. Can the same be said for your superhero, however?"
Arthur was not sure how to respond to that, but was abruptly interrupted by Alfred calling from the kitchen. "Hey Arthur! What did you want me to do with this fridge?"
After asking a few more questions, letting Alfred eat the leftover pizza in his fridge, and taking Alfred's measurements (which was definitely the highlight of Francis' evening), Francis finally closed the door on Arthur and Alfred, turned slowly, and smiled into the seemingly empty living room. "You can show yourself now, mon chér."
Matthew gradually materialised in the corner of the room, colours slowly and waveringly taking shape, until he finally appeared full and complete, leaning leisurely against the wall beside the window. He smiled back softly, his blonde hair falling in his dark blue eyes, his lithe body oh so stylishly clad in a perfectly cut skintight red outfit. But of course – Francis had designed it himself. "So," said Matthew in his quiet, gentle voice. "We have a new superhero in town."
Francis walked into the room and fell onto the soft leather couch with a sigh. "Apparently."
Matthew's voice spoke just behind him and Francis sighed again when he felt strong fingers running through his hair. "And Arthur knows about the Perfume Villain. Does he know how serious the danger is?"
"Mon chér, he has no idea."
"Do you think this 'America' can do something about it?"
"I'm not sure. But from what I have seen keeping an eye on him these last few months, I think maybe he can. But first, however, it seems I must help Arthur to make a star of this 'America'."
"Hmm. It looks like things are going to get interesting again, soon." Matthew gave a tiny laugh. "Perhaps it is time for you to make a comeback."
Francis laughed at that. Not that the idea had not occurred to him… not a day went by he did not think of taking his old but fabulous outfit from his wardrobe and once again flying out into the night, on the prowl for a villain to battle or a damsel to rescue… Feeling Matthew's fingers still running through his hair, Francis abruptly cut off that pointless line of fantasy. He was practically a married man now. With a damned desk job. Oh, how things changed. "I am contributing far more at the paper right now than I could on the streets. The city must be convinced it is safe." But he could not resist adding, "For the future, who knows."
"It will be a dark day for the villains of Hetalopolis the day the Bad Friend Trio reforms."
Francis flinched at the mention of the name, then felt his jaw clench. "That day will never come, Matthew."
"We will see." Matthew removed his hand and Francis turned to look up at him. He was starting to fade.
"You are not staying?"
Matthew smiled as his countenance gradually diminished. "Unlike others, I have not retired, Francis. And evil still stalks the streets... if you know where to find it."
"Be careful, mon amour."
The Invisible Canadian disappeared. To defend the streets, to fight crime, to help maintain the perfect little illusion of the city's newfound safety and freedom. Francis fell back against the couch and stared up at a framed photograph on the opposite wall. A photograph of the Bad Friend Trio, laughing wildly at the camera, the fiercest crime fighting trio to ever fly the skies of Hetalopolis. Then Francis rubbed his eyes sleepily, got to his feet, and stumbled down the hall to bed. Those days were behind him. Though it seemed like others were taking up the call…
.
Meanwhile, across town…
.
Most superheroes had retired after the end of the sunflower posse and the worst of the supervillains. Not Lady Érzelem. She loved the action. She loved the knowledge that she was doing something right. She loved her face on the front pages of the newspapers the next day, smiling heroically in her elegant green outfit and mask, a caption underneath saying she was just doing her job, she required no thanks, though of course she was open for that Vogue photo shoot next week. Lately, though, all that had been in short supply. No supervillains meant no need for superheroes. No world threatening devices to destroy; no evil masterminded plots to thwart. Now she had to try and find other ways to be heroic.
But everything was just so boring these days. Tonight, with nothing else to do, Lady Érzelem - aka Elizaveta Héderváry, or Eliza to her frie… her acquain… well, uh, to people she had spoken to at a few times, anyway - ran across the skyline of Hetalopolis, jumping easily from building to building, keeping an eye, an ear, and her inner senses out for any sort of disturbance where she could swoop in and heroically save the day. The city below glittered with a billion steady and flashing lights, roared with the sound of horns and traffic and the occasional siren. But all was peaceful. Eliza found herself, not for the first time, wishing for the return of a real big bad supervillain to shake this city around a little. Someone like the Tsar, or the Emperor… sure, there was the crime and the corruption and the occasional random, mindless acts of violence, but hey – there was also no lack of photo opportunities.
As she dropped down from the high rise buildings and started to pass over the roofs of the rich, ritzy, residential part of town, Eliza noticed a pillar of smoke and orange light blazing not too far in the distance. Her heart soared in her chest and she made her way quickly towards it. Yes! An opportunity for a heroic rescue! The light blazed around her and she dropped through an open window of the burning house, racing immediately down the stairs and onto the ground floor. "Hello?" she shouted down the hall. "Citizens?" The place was enormous; practically a palace. There was no way she could check the entire house just by yelling. Eliza stopped, breathed and focused; stretched her mind into her surroundings and grasped for the feel of any emotion in the place. Only silence. There was nothing. She groaned in disappointment. Just her luck - no one was even home. She headed towards the front door, the air thick and choking, when someone suddenly rushed up the hall towards her. Only he was running into the fire, not away from it. Eliza stepped in front of him in shock. But she hadn't felt anyone in here… "Hey, what are you doing?"
The man tried to push her away. He did not even seem surprised to find a stranger in his house. "My violin," he cried, his eyes looking past her and down the hall. "I have to get my violin!"
Eliza grasped the man's arms to hold him back, her brows immediately furrowing in confusion. Even touching him, she could get no grasp on his emotions at all. Then she almost forgot to feel surprised when the bright light of the fire illuminated his panicked face - his handsome, noble features, his dark, elegant hair, his deep dark eyes behind his glasses. Oh, this was going to look great for the cameras. Eliza tried to pull the young man towards the front door. "Don't be stupid, we have to leave immediately."
"No, you don't understand, my..." The man was cut off by a beam smashing from the ceiling behind them. The fire surged, roaring out of control.
Eliza swore to herself. This situation was getting serious, fast. "Sorry, my friend, I am getting you out of here."
"No!" He tried again to push his way past, looking frantic and growing quickly hysterical. Such strong emotions… and Eliza could get no read on them whatsoever. But he was still trying to run into the fire, and Eliza had no choice but to worry about that later.
"Sorry about this." Eliza punched the man in the stomach, hard, immediately incapacitating him. She caught him before he fell, threw him over her shoulder, and began to make her way to the door, coughing and sweating and squinting to see through the smoke. And then, suddenly, someone appeared in the smoke before her - white cape draped over his shoulder, red eyes gleaming behind his white mask, his hands on his hips and his voice deep and booming.
"Never fear, fair citizens of Hetalopolis, for Sheer Awesome is here to save..." He broke off and his voice rose an octave. "Eliza, what the hell are you doing here?"
Eliza gritted her teeth and felt her stomach recoil. Gilbert… No wonder she could get no read on the frantic man. Eliza's power of reading and manipulating people's emotions was rendered completely useless around Gilbert's power to turn emotions off completely. Even when he wasn't using the ability, somehow their powers clashed, and both were left stripped of their most important skill. Eliza growled at him. "Fuck off ambulance chaser, I have this completely under control!"
"Oh yes, it looks like it." An enormous crash blasted immediately behind her, making Eliza flinch slightly. Gilbert reached for the man over her shoulder. "Here, hand him to me..."
Eliza spun away and tried to push past. "So you get all the glory? Screw you, I'm saving the day here, you're too late." If anyone loved the spotlight and the press more than Eliza, it was Sheer Awesome: former member of the Bad Friend Trio and perpetual thorn in Eliza's side. It was one of the things that had broken up the successful trio - Gilbert's incessant need for publicity, his constant hogging of the spotlight, his always taking other people's credit. And now he spent his days turning up at every minor disturbance in the city. Which meant that Eliza ran into him far more than was healthy for either's career or stress levels.
Gilbert grabbed the man's chin as Eliza walked past. "Ooh, he's a bit of a looker, isn't he."
"I saw him first!" cried Eliza, slapping Gilbert's hand away.
"I think he's passed out from the smoke."
"Oh shit, really?"
"Here, I'll give him mouth to mouth."
Eliza briefly considered it. That would actually be kind of hot… "What, no! We have to get out of here! There must be a stack of reporters outside waiting to interview me!"
The man moaned incoherently and Gilbert put his ear to the man's mouth. "What was that?"
"He keeps saying something about a damn violin, now get out of my way, I've got to be first out of here for the cameras." Eliza settled the man over her shoulder, pushed towards the door, flicked her hair, fixed her face into that brave, effortless, beautiful and oh so heroic expression, then stepped out of the burning inferno to find… a single fire truck. She looked around in confusion. Where were the cameras? Where were the reporters? Damn it all, where were the people to enquire admiringly how impossibly good her hair still looked after all that? "The hell? Where's the press?"
"What do you think you're doing, little miss?"
Eliza shot the firefighter a disdainful, furious, brutally warning glare. "What did you just call me?"
The man took a step backwards. "Uh... I just mean... Well, geez, we didn't think no one was in there."
Eliza shook her head, rolled her eyes. Was everyone in this town a complete idiot these days… "Oh for goodness... Look, just call an ambulance, will you?"
Eliza carried the man a safe distance from the fire and laid him gently on the ground. She smoothed back his hair and tapped his handsome face lightly. Wow. He really was stunning. "Come on, pretty boy. Open your eyes."
The man very slowly blinked as he started to wake, then looked up at her with deep, dark brown eyes. His face brightened as he stared in awe. "Oh," he said quietly. "An angel."
Eliza's breath caught a little and her heart started to beat faster. But then he looked past her and Eliza turned to follow his line of sight. Well, damn it all. Gilbert was walking out of the building of smoke and fire, holding a violin like some sort of holy grail, looking like a damn cheesy action hero. Eliza gritted her teeth and felt a growl rise in her throat. And now Pretty Boy was looking at Gilbert with those awestruck brown eyes.
Gilbert strode up to them, fell to one knee, and pressed the violin into the man's hands. He flashed a grin he probably thought was charming. "Ihre Violine."
The brunette stared up at him, wide eyed and astounded. "Danke."
Eliza clenched her fists. Sneaky, dirty, underhanded bastard, damn it all how was she supposed to know the gorgeous violinist spoke German? She could have pulled that trick, too. She used all her strength to try and get a read on the man's feelings. It was useless. With Gilbert here, she could get nothing.
Sirens split the night as an ambulance screamed up the street and pulled onto the curb beside them. An ambulance officer jumped out of the van and hurried over to the musician, throwing Eliza and Gilbert a derisive glare. "You superhero guys still hanging around?"
Gilbert glared back. "Well if it wasn't for me this guy would be pretty fried right now."
Eliza turned on Gilbert, about ready to scream. "You? You arrogant bloated wind bag bastard lying piece of..." Eliza got angrily to her feet and Gilbert quickly followed.
"You're just jealous because the pretty musician so obviously wants me."
"Wants you? The guy's practically catatonic! Where do you come up with these delusions?"
"Did you see the way he looked at me when I walked out of that house all smooth and awesome and totally badass?"
"I'm the one who saved his life! You just grabbed a piece of wood!"
"For all your ability to read people's emotions, Eliza, you can be pretty dense. That's why you'll always be alone."
"Says the guy who ruined the only friendships he ever had with the only two people in the world who could possibly stand you!"
"That was not my fault, that was NEVER my fault!"
"Oh, come on, Gilbert, EVERYONE knows that was your fault!"
"Bullshit, it was all because of little Yoko Italiano."
"Lovino. You broke the guy's arm, you'd think you could remember his name."
"That incident was completely justified and taken so far out of context after the fact!"
"Whatever, the point is, you will never again find anyone who can put up with you."
"All right, come on, let's see, shall we? Let's see which one of us can land the pretty musician here!"
"Do you forget that I can manipulate people's emotions?"
"Do you forget that I can turn people's off?"
"Is this a challenge?"
"Hell yes it's a challenge!"
"All right then, you are on, Beilschmidt. You are so on! Wait, hang on, where did he go?"
Eliza looked up from the haze of anger and furious shouting to see the ambulance driving off into the distance. She kicked the ground forcefully. "Damn it, I don't even know his name." She looked back up at the burning house, the blaze already under control. A firefighter sauntered past and shot the two superheroes an almost pitiful look.
"You know, the fire department really coulda handled this one."
"Oh yeah?" shouted Gilbert angrily. "Well, screw you too!"
Eliza sighed and placed her hands on her hips. They stood in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes before she finally said, "Is it bad that I liked it better when the supervillains ran this town? When we were important."
"When we were noticed."
"When we had an actual purpose. I'm really starting to wish something would happen to liven this place up a bit."
The fire before them finally burned out, the smoke hissing as it rose hazily into the sky. Gilbert tapped his foot edgily, then shot Eliza a sideways glance. "Feel like a drink?"
Eliza opened her mouth to retort angrily, but only managed to sigh resignedly, "Hell yes I feel like a goddamn drink."
"You're paying."
"We'll settle it with an arm wrestle."
"Ah, damn it."
The two superheroes walked into the night, white and green capes flying behind them, their tired, worn faces masked from the uncaring world. Unneeded, forgotten, and intent on getting completely, smashingly, rip-roaring drunk.
.
Meanwhile, across town…
.
"But look at it, Liet, isn't it just the prettiest, most sparkliest, most, like, totally awesome necklace you've ever seen?"
"Feliks, you're in the paper! Are you even listening to me?"
But of course Feliks wasn't listening. Feliks never listened. He just lay on the couch in the tiny second room of their tiny three room high rise apartment, surrounded by sparkling jewellery, playing gleefully with the enormous shining green diamond that rested around his neck. "This is going to look totally killer with that green off the shoulder top…"
"Feliks!" Toris tried to ignore how adorable Feliks looked in his little skirt, lounging on a bed of jewels, his green eyes lit up brightly and his blonde hair tousled on the armrest. It wasn't adorable, Toris shouted silently. It was stupid, irresponsible, it could ruin everything… Toris marched up to Feliks and waved the newspaper in his face. "Look! Look at you here! Plain for everyone to see - you're waving at the camera, for goodness sakes!"
Feliks snatched the paper from Toris' hand and scrutinised it closely. "Cuuuuute! I'm so totally relieved I got my hair done that morning."
"Pay attention, Feliks! This is serious! People are starting to notice!"
Feliks groaned loudly and tossed the paper onto the ground. "The way I see it, I'm, like, liberating this jewellery. I mean, what is the point of having this totally gorgeous stone locked away in a bank vault? It needs to be worn, to be shown to the world." He gasped, his face brightening. "Ooh, ooh, I tell you what, yeah… I'm totally gonna wear it to that big charity ball we're dropping in on next weekend!"
Toris bit his lip not to scream. "Right, yes. Brilliant idea. And you don't think that maybe people might go, 'Oh, hey, look, there's that billion dollar diamond that went missing from Hetalopolis Bank last week, I wonder what it's doing around the neck of that adorable blonde boy with the fabulous hair?'"
Feliks flicked his hair from his face. "My hair is fabulous, isn't it."
"Those highlights really work for you."
"I know, right, like how well do they go with my eyes and stuff."
"And the green diamond really sets it all off… No, damn it, stop! This is a serious problem!"
"Oh, relax. With the Emperor coming back, it's only a matter of weeks before we're running this town again anyway." Feliks stretched his arm above his head, his shirt sliding up his stomach to display a tanned, tempting curve of skin. He smiled slowly, lazily; lifted his leg just enough to allow his skirt to ride up and expose his thigh. Toris swallowed heavily. "Come on, Liet." Feliks fingered the green stone around his neck and blinked up at Toris with wide, innocent eyes. "Don't be mad. You know how totally hot I look in this necklace."
Toris raised his eyes to the ceiling. He sometimes wished he had stronger will power. But then…
"AHH, LIET! What are you… ohhh…"
To be continued...
.
Disclaimer: This story belongs to George deValier. Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. I own nothing.
THANK YOU OCEAN-BABYBLUES FOR SAVING THIS CHAPTER!
8 notes · View notes
wheremytwinwatches · 4 years
Text
[Where My Twin Watches]: Puella Magi Madoka Magica Episode 3
Last time, on PMMM- Uh, never mind then, we’re starting without a recap. Person in a (hospital?) bed, looking out a window? Yup, looks like a hospital hallway, Sayaka’s outside the door, seems nervous. Visiting someone?
She’s giving the guy a CD- oh, this must be from Ep 1’s music store. Which would make this guy *checks Ep 1 notes* Kamijo? I can’t tell from the lighting, but I think he has bluish hair. So is a relative of Sayaka, younger brother? Ooh, looks like a classical CD, nice taste. Kamijo thanks her for finding a rare CD. It’s even a soloist that he knows, nice touch! He offers an earbud so Sayaka can listen as well- are you blushing, Sayaka? Reconsidering my assumption of family connection. Confirmation that they are in a hospital so they can’t play over a speaker, he leans over and yeah this is definitely a crush on Sayaka’s part, blush and shimmery eyes and everything. Aw, this is sweet, listening to some nice calm music- memory? Little boy playing violin on a stage and dressed-up Sayaka in the audience. Oh, so if this is Kamijo playing then she saw him back then and they became friends later? Seriously digging this music. Wait, is Kamijo… crying? Oh. Oh no. Oh god damn it. Kamijo’s crying, his left hand is twitching and he has a bandage on his arm… Is he in the hospital from an accident or something, and his left arm got messed up? Can he not play anymore? That’s… that’s pretty heavy. Um, yeah. Sorry, that intro was a bit of a kick, the peppy song’s not really doing it for me right now. I mean, I’m way out of practice with my own playing, as as a trumpet player I use my right hand a lot more than my left, but… damn. Ahem. Let’s get back to the review, shall we? Mami! Corkscrew Hair is doing what she do, and obliterating another witch with ‘Tiro Finale’. And there is just something hilarious at seeing this blonde middle-schooler standing on top of a lamppost, easily balancing a massive gun twice her size with one hand. Sayaka and Madoka come out of cover to compliment her, Mami tries to remind them that fighitng witches is dangerous but come on Mami, you’re doing awesome right now. Think of how effective the team will be when the girls get their powers! Hey, that’s right Madoka, I didn’t see a Grief Seed this time. Ah, Kyubey explains it was just a familiar, and that’s going to be confusing seeing as I’ve been calling Kyubey a Familiar this whole time. Should I go back to using Rabbit-Thing, or is there another phrase that works better? Anyways, seems that Witches have familiars that don’t carry Grief Seeds. And the girls have only been fighting ‘duds’ lately, so no more powerups. Still, like Mami says, better to take out the minions so they don’t cause trouble. And wow yeah, if familiars can grow into full witches then you definitely want to take them out. Well, that’s one more eldritch creature dealt with, onwards! Mami’s asking if the girls have figured out their wishes, both say that they still aren’t sure. Oh yeah, why not ask what Mami wished for, maybe she has some insight. Wait, why did she stop? Oh come on, PMMM! A car crash?! First you smack me down with that depressing hospital scene, and now you’re telling me that Mami had to use her wish to not die?! Jebus. Well, at least Kyubey showed up in time to help, but dang that’s a missed opportunity. Still, Mami doesn’t regret it (understandable, as the alternative was dying, but Madoka and Sayaka have a chance to actually consider their wishes. Best that they take advantage of that. Wait. Wait wait wait. Car crash, end of last episode Mami saying she doesn’t have anyone to talk to, she lives on her own- oh what the hell. Mami’s an orphan? No. NO. Not cool, PMMM. Ok, we need flowers and chocolates and hugs for Mami stat. Get on it, commenters! After that depressing as hell realization, Sayaka- ooh, clarification on the wish, good for you Sayaka! More rules please. “If you make a wish, does it have to be for yourself?” Strictly hypothetical, of course. Yeah, you aren’t fooling Kyubey (or us), Sayaka. You want to help out Kamijo? Aw, that’s sweet. Kyubey confirms that the wish does not have to be for the contractee, and that there’s actually precedent for it. I’m trying to keep track of these Wish Rules, get an idea of what our characters will wish for; Wish Rules 1) The contract comes with one Wish 2) The Wish can grant “even the most impossible of miracles” 3) The Wish does not have to be used for/on the Contractee Anything I’ve missed so far? Huh, Mami is actually counseling against using the Wish on someone else. Although I’m not sure this caution about making doubly sure you know what you’re wishing for applies, it’s pretty clear that Kamijo wants to play music again. Oh. Um, yeah. Ok, that’s a good point. “Do you actually wish to grant his dream so that he will be grateful to you?” A bit harsh, but probably best that Mami’s brought it up. Right now the Wish has so many potentials, but once it’s used it’s gone for good. So then, how can we structure this Wish so we can help Kamijo and not have it be about Sayaka’s crush? Because yeah, I’m picturing a scenario where Sayaka’s trying to convince Kamijo that she healed him with the help of a magical talking Rabbit-Thing who’s totally right here, he’s just invisible to you. Commenters, when you’re done with Mami-hugs get on that too! But just as we settle on not rushing into the Wish, Kyubey pipes up about it being better for him if they decide sooner. Hey, I don’t know how you grant these Wishes, Rabbit-Thing, but I’m with Mami: they’ll decide on their own time, don’t pressure them. Back at Madoka’s home, she’s thinking over the Wish while Kyubey sits there, he seems to have relented on rushing their decision. Good for you, Kyubey. Hmm, he also can’t suggest wishes because it’s against the rules? 4) Kyubey cannot suggest a Wish Huh, but Madoka asks if just wishing to become a Magical Girl would work. And rather for power for its own sake, Madoka… or maybe it is for its own sake? Aw, Madoka’s doing the “I’m not smart or talented” thing that young Protagonists do. Wait, you’re comparing yourself to Mami? Madoka, don’t do that, Mami’s a full-fledged MG and you’re still a Muggle, of course you’re going to seem ‘lesser’ compared to that. Give it time! But this is an interesting view, the Protagonist simply wanting to be like someone she admires. Wait, “you’d be much more powerful than Mami”? We’re talking about the ‘kill witches with a single shot’ girl here, right, not some other Mami? But it depends on what kind of wish she makes? And he can’t tell how large of a Soul Gem Madoka would summon? Protagonist powers, ho! Yeah, “never met another girl with such enormous potential as you”. If this means that Madoka will be measurably stronger than Mami, then this is going to be amazing. Wait, interruption of ‘Super Special Protagonist Talk’ by Father, seems Mother is… drunk out of her mind. Wow, didn’t think she was a drinker, and based on Madoka’s reaction this is way too common. Character flaw, nice job on fleshing out Madoka’s family, PMMM! Now this is a lovely family; put the drunk Mother to bed, then the Father and Daughter enjoy a late-night hot chocolate. Futher characterization of the Mother as they discuss how she likes to try her best, and that emerges as a fearsome work drive. “While she may not be living a dream, they way she is living is ideal to her.” More philosophy! And good philosophy for an early Protagonist who’s uncertain about where her life will go with these magical discoveries.
Hey Mami, what’s up? Going hunting on your own tonight? Or just visiting a fountai- HOLY CRAP HOMURA. Where the hell did you come from? Oh, are you really trying the “you’re involving innocents in our dispute” gambit? You’re the one who threatened Madoka’s family, you do not get to try and claim moral high ground. And as Mami said, they’re MG potentials, they can see the danger. Ok, now you’re ticking me off, Homura. “You’re trying to lead them so that they want to be magical girls”? Lead nothing, it’s the smart move! They get powers, they get a Wish, and whatever danger a Witch poses is much better handled by three than one. And since you refuse to team up… Aha, Madoka was namedropped. So you can sense her Protagonist Potential like Kyubey? Oh, and Mami can sense it as well. Dang, the sound and lighting in this ‘conversation’ is top notch, as civil as it sounds you’re really getting the sense of two powerful magic users facing eachother down. ...wow, that was a blow, Mami. Calling out Homura for being afraid someone stronger than her will show up, saying that’s how a bullied child thinks. Yeah, Homura did not like that. Yeah, Mami is fed up with Homura’s attitude. “You don’t want to fight? Then make sure we don’t meet again.” Definitely getting more direct in the conversation, but given this girl threatened Madoka, tried to kill Kyubey, and has refused all offers of charity and partnership, there’s really nothing more that Mami can do. Yup, Homura’s pissed. She knows she’s weaker, doesn’t want to share, and only stands to fall further behind if things keep up. I’m worried she’s going to try something drastic. (See theory of her summoning Giant Winged Thing) The next day! Sayaka’s visiting the hospital again, or not? Ok, she went to try and visit Kamijo, but has just met up with Madoka and Kyubey in the waiting room, seems he was preoccupied. Well this is a hospital Sayaka, I’d think he has surgeries or whatnot to do occasionally. Why did you stop, Madoka? Oh crap that’s a Grief Seed. That’s a Grief Seed, at a hospital, and it’s about to hatch. This is the worst place one could show up- Wait. This really is the worst place one could show up. A hospital full of sick or injured people, including Sayaka’s friend/crush? Discovered just as it’s about to hatch by the two non-MGs? And it looks like it’s stuck in the pillar… Oh Homura you bitch. Is this really how low you will go, planting witches to try and scare off or remove the competition? That’s it, you are officially on my List. Ok, they need to get Mami here now, if not sooner. But… they don’t have Mami’s number? Ok, then can they use Kyubey to telepath her? No, seems they can’t do that. So Madoka will have to go find her (hopefully she’s at her apartment) while Sayaka stays behind. Sayaka that is a terrible idea, you aren’t prepared to face a labyrinth. Ah there we go! That’s better, have Kyubey stay with Sayaka so when Madoka and Mami get within telepath range they can stay in touch, if Sayaka ends up in the labyrinth. And if worst comes to worst, then Sayaka can ask a Wish and get her powers, better than being stuck in there on her own as a Muggle. Still, I hope that Mami gets here soon. Madoka’s off to find Mami, and ok guess the Seed is hatching now, Sayaka and Kyubey have vanished. And we’re in trippy Witch Land again! Huh, this one seems much more hospital themed than the last one. So the Labyrinth designs change based on the location? Cool! Sayaka and Kyubey are going into the labyrinth, and Kyubey’s suggesting what I did, that if she decided on a Wish then he could make her a Magical Girl. Well, unless there’s some time required for the contract to form, as long as they aren’t at immediate risk I’d motion for patience here, Mami should be here soon to take over. Oh hey, they’re at the Seed already. It hasn’t hatched? Oh, so the labyrinth forms first, then the Seed hatches. So they’ve got more time then. Sayaka’s showing patience as well, seems the earlier conversation on thinking over a Wish sunk in. Later, Mami and Madoka have shown up to the site, and they’ve opened up the gate and can contact Kyubey now. They’re ok for now, Sayaka even claims boredom. But since large amounts of magic could disturb the egg, Mami and Madoka are going to go on foot to catch up. Stealth over speed, got it. Back in Hospital Land (huh, I’m seeing a lot of cookies and cakes now, what’s with that?), Mami is guiding Madoka along, while admonishing Sayaka for taking such a risk. But she does admit it was a clear-headed call. Good to see that Sayaka is getting some tactical sense, always nice to see characters develop traits. Now they ca Homura. We don’t have time to deal with you, Dark Magical Girl. And you do not get to claim this “prey”, not when I know what you did! And like hell are we going to let you be alone with Kyubey and non-MG Sayaka. Yes, thank you Mami! Don’t waste any time, just detain her and move on. There’s a witch to go kill. “This witch is not like the others!” Gee, I wonder how you know that? Seriously, just shut up Homura, Mami has to go and clean up your mess. Ok, with the others keeping an eye on the Seed and Homura tied up, things should be calm enough for a conversation. Madoka’s taking the chance to discuss the Wish with Mami- oh, you’ve thought of one? But you’re worried that it might be naive, so you’ll run it by the MG. Good, that’s a safe call. Aw, Madoka’s giving her “I’m no used to anyone and have to bother others for help” deal. Madoka, you are stronger than you know, you’re the Protagonist. But it’s sweet that her concern is over not being able to help others- Ah, I think I know how to describe it now. It’s not “Power for its own sake”, it’s “Power for others' sakes.” Yes, good for you Madoka! That is the kind of unambiguous heroine we can all support. Madoka’s describing how she saw Mami fighting for others, and that she knew that was what she wanted. And given the possibility that she could do the same thing- Um. Mami does not look happy. So all Madoka wants is to become a Magical Girl, to have the power to help others. That is her Dream. Which kind of makes the Wish superfluous. And Mami just let go of her hand. Uh oh. Mami, please don’t dampen this, Precious Protagonist is Precious. Well, Mami is correct, having the powers is a burden, she’ll be at risk of injury and will have complications regarding a ‘normal’ life. But Madoka doesn’t mind, she thinks that highly of Mami! Mami. Mami no. You are absolutely worth looking up to. You fight to protect others. You’ve endured such hardship and still try to use your powers for good. You have saved lives. But I get it. You’re scared, you have no one to really talk to. You’ve been alone from the time of the crash to now. (Feels) Madoka: “But you’re not alone any more, Mami.” (Feeeeeels) Aw no, please don’t cry Mami, this is… this is… oh wow. Ok, I know that they’re on a mission, that Sayaka and Kyubey are waiting for them, that a hospital is at risk, but… this is adorable. This is sweet. Mami and Madoka talking right now… That’s it, I give in. I apologize to whom it may offend, but I ship it. Mami, who’s shown incredible power but has been alone all this time? Madoka, the uncertain Protagonist who will one day come into her own? I really like this, the two of them working together. (Don’t worry Sayaka, you’ve got your crush. Although I can see her poking fun at these two on future missions. Hee!) Ok, after the adorableness they’re setting back on track, but Madoka does still have a Wish, even if she ‘just’ wants to be a MG. Hah! That’s one way to make her think about it, give her until the witch is defeated or they’ll use it for a cake. To celebrate their becoming a magical girl duo! (Yeah, I ship this! No stopping this boat!) Whoops! I guess the witch finally got tired of waiting, the Seed is going to hatch! Time for subtlety is over, bring it on Creeps! Ok, now Mami’s just showing off, with all those dancing moves and twirling of rifles. Awesome, they caught up with Sayaka and Kyubey. Here comes the witch! … what. No seriously, what? That’s the witch? That’s a doll. Aaand Mami just knocked its chair out from under it. Oh, I get it. Newly-hatched witch, going to be weaker before it feeds. Looks like they got there just in time! Batter up! And the doll goes flying! Barely dodges a few shots before slumping to the ground, and Mami just executes it. Time for the finishing move? “Tiro Finale!” And the witch is Wait no, something just came out. A Clown Worm? Oh, so the witch has a second form. Ok, just wait what what just happened Um. The ribbons that were holding Homura just vanished. So… Mami released the spell, decided to let Homura fight the second stage with her? Why are you not WHAT
Tumblr media
WHAT THE HELL Mami is being held from the top of the screen, she’s twitching, her uniform just dispelled and she just fell down. Mami fell down and the worm is… the worm is eating I can hear it eating Madoka. Madoka and Sayaka don’t look just get out run run now Yes, thank you Kyubey! Make the contract now, you have to do it! Stop watching and make the damn contract oh hell the worm is looking up, it sees them. Homura. Homura just… do something, don’t It just ate Homura. I don’t know, what the hell. Wait, it missed? It keeps on missing, or she’s just barely dodging. And now the worm is exploding? Whatever Homura’s doing the worm is getting hit, and I think the worm is finally down. But now she’s walking towards the girls. There was a clink. The witch’s Grief Seed just fell and shattered a teacup. Mami. “Burn this sight into your minds. This is what it means to be a magical girl.” The labyrinth is collapsing, the four are back at the hospital. Homura, you NO Put that Seed down, Homura! Mami died for it, you do not get to swoop in and and No fuck that you do not get to have that Seed just because you’re a Magical Girl. You don’t Homura’s gone. Kyubey is sitting there. Sayaka and Madoka are crying. I… Uh, the credits are here, and the song changed? I… I think this is the same music from the Dream. Staticky Madoka is walking along past other staticky forms That’s Mami. That’s Mami’s silhouette. The episode end still has the flute music and an picture of Madoka in her uniform and Kyubey. “Mami… was truly a kind-hearted person. To make us really understand what kind of resolve we’d need in order to fight...she...Miracles and Magic are real.” ...I’m going to take some time to process this. I will try to be more coherent later.
1 note · View note
Text
Second Chance for a Super Villain’s Minion Part 4
Continuing a longer story! Hooray! 
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 can all be found here! 
Hope you guys enjoy. 
“I have plans.” Jack was laying on her workshop table, idly fiddling with one  of Abigail’s half-finished inventions.
“Hmm.” Abigail didn’t know what to say, she still felt nervous around Jack when they were alone, even after these several years of being his minion.
“I’ll get more and more people on my side, take over the country slowly. By the time they realize it, I’ll be in charge of everything.” He grinned, tossing the small metal object in the air and catching it.
She wrinkled her brows, confused. “How are you going to get them to your side?”
“I have a gift.” He laughed softly. “I can convince anyone, anywhere, that they need to join my team.”
“Sounds fake.”
“Coming from you that’s not too convincing.” He grinned at her. “Aren’t you on my side?”
Abigail blushed, hanging her head down and continuing to work on her invention.
“What’s that?” He sat up, pulling it from her hands.
“Hey…” She started to protest, but felt too uncomfortable to continue. “It’s a shielding ray, it will be able to block all sorts of projectiles and other deadly weapons.”
Jack studied it closer, now with more interest. “Really?”
“Yes, although it’s not finished yet.” She took it back, continuing to work on it.
“You’re the best, Abby! “ He hugged her tightly, causing her heart rate to increase. 
“What’s taking so long?” Jack’s irritated voice broke Abigail out of her memories. She smiled to herself, clutching the cell phone a little tighter.
“I’ve been at Infinity Tech for less than a month, idiot. Do you really think I can get my hands on sensitive information in that short of time?”
“…” He didn’t answer, but Abigail could feel his rage over the phone. She chuckled quietly, savoring the chance to talk back to him. In her previous life Jack had always been in control, always saying exactly what she wanted to hear when she needed to hear it. She had believed him without question, following him blindly.
But now…
“Well… if you don’t get something soon, this partnership is over!” His voice was frantic, unsure. Abigail’s smile widened.
“Alright then.”
“… what do you mean ‘alright’?!”
She shrugged, forgetting briefly that Jack wouldn’t be able to see the gesture over the phone. “I mean, if you don’t want to be partners, then fine. I never needed you.”
Those words felt so wonderful to say.
“I- YOU…F-fine. Take your time. Just get results… or else…”
“Or else what?” This was fun. She had never heard him so on edge.
“Or I’ll tell your new hero buddies who you’ve been talking with!”
“Really?” She couldn’t help it, she laughed out loud. “And why should they care that I’m talking to a nobody?”
“I won’t be a nobody for long, Abby. And then how will you explain these little “chats” of ours?”
She squeezed the phone so tightly she was surprised it didn’t snap in her hand.
“I’ve told you before. Call me “Abby” one more time and you’ll find out just how deadly having me as your enemy can be.”
“My threat still stands. Either you come up with something useful, or I’ll blow your cover. Tell me if- ”
Abigail hung up the phone, rolling her eyes. In her first lifetime she had hung on his every word, laughed at every joke, obsessed over every compliment.
Of course in that lifetime she hadn’t remembered what it felt like to die.
She thought over his threat to reveal her communications with him, her eyes narrowing as she reviewed her options.
Guess this means I go with plan C. She winced, not happy. Of course it always was the most certain plan to achieving my revenge… If only…
“Abigail?”
If only it hadn’t involved trusting HIM.  Sighing quietly Abigail blanked her expression and turned to face the newcomers.
“Ben.” She greeted her murderer from a previous lifetime, unable to summon enough energy to smile at him. A polite nod would have to do. He didn’t seem to mind, he responded with a bright smile, looking around her workshop with unbridled enthusiasm.
“Are we interrupting your work?” He asked, his eyes focusing on the metal object in her hands. Two men entered behind him, also glancing at her curiously.
“You’re fine, just tweaking a few things on the shielding ray.” She tossed it to him. “Check it out.”
Ben caught it, studying it for a brief moment before activating it, his whole body was surrounded with a bright blue beam of light. “Ooh, I like the quick activation time!” He turned to the young man on his right. “Hey Ronnie, shoot me!”
His friend, who Abigail vaguely recognized as a minor superhero with speed time powers, frowned at his suggestion. “That seems a little extreme, Ben. What if it doesn’t work?”
“That’s because you haven’t seen one of these things in action. Abigail’s work is amazing! Ben shook his head. “Come on, don’t be such baby. Shoot me!”
“No.” He turned to Abigail. “Would you do the honors?”
She didn’t bat an eye. “Sure.” She drew her gun, shooting him five times in the chest.
“ARE YOU CRAZY?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” Ronnie shouted, racing forward to take her gun away.
Not wanting him to touch her weapon, she tapped her wrist, firing a bright white beam from her bracelet, which froze him in place. It only lasted a few moments, but by the time he had broken free, Ben had stepped between them.
“Ronnie, buddy, I’m fine! The shielding ray worked perfectly. “ He turned towards Abigail with a slight frown. “Although could you maybe not enjoy shooting me quite so much?”
Abigail shrugged, “We all have our vices.” There was something cathartic about shooting the man who had murdered you, even if he had been drugged at the time and it had been in another life. It would be more abnormal if she didn’t enjoy it under those circumstances.
“Umm… I’m going to table to the whole ‘shooting me is your vice’ discussion to a later date. Let’s focus on the reason for being here: Ronnie, Zeke, what do you guys think of the shielding ray.”
Ronnie made a face. “Seems effective enough.”
The other young man, thin, tall with thick glasses and a seemingly permanent sneer on his face, merely snorted derisively and turned away. Abigail studied him a little closer, curious.
Zeke…don’t tell me… Z?!!
Z had been a famous inventor on the heroes side in her last life. He had invented multiple ingenious weapons, some so complex that she had developed a sort of grudging respect for him. They had been secret rivals on different sides, not only trying to out-invent the other, but frequently they would steal and upgrade the other’s designs as well.
Abigail couldn’t help but smile as she remembered the satisfaction of cracking Z’s blueprints and making his designs even better. At the time she had been mostly looking to impress Jack, but her secondary goal had been to piss off the hero inventor as well.
Ben sighed at the negative reaction from his friend. “Come on, Zeke, what didn’t you like? It worked perfectly.”
The sour faced man snorted again. “Yeah. Too perfectly.” Stomping up close to Abigail, he stuck a finger in his face. “There’s no way that you came up with that design on your own. Who helped you?!”
Abigail raised an eyebrow. “I helped myself.”
“That’s impossible.”
“Why is that?”
“Your barely grown. You’re what…. eighteen? Plus you’re… you’re…”
“A woman?” She suggested with a wry grin.
Zeke’s face reddened. “I WASN’T GOING TO SAY THAT! You haven’t even got a degree! How are you qualified to work here?!”
Abigail spread her hands. “I have a qualification.”
“What’s that?”
“It’s called: ‘I’m better at your job than you’.”
“YOU-“ He lunged forward, but was caught by Ben.
“Come on guys! No need to fight! We’re on the same team after all! Besides, Zeke, I wouldn’t underestimate her, I’ve seen her work.”
Zeke continued glaring at her. “It could be faked, I doubt she has any real ability.”
“Really?” Abigail laughed. “Then let’s try this.” She stretched out her arm, shooting him with the freezing ray. As he solidified into place, she stepped forward, searching his pockets.
“Abigail…” Ben warned her, although his eyes were laughing.
“Don’t worry, I just need to pick up…. this!” She lifted the weapon from his pocket successfully.
“The shockwave gun?” Ben looked confused.
“Yeah, give me three minutes.” She took it back to her workstation, quickly disassembling the weapon. It was a intricate piece of work, the attention to detail in the mechanism almost a work of art in itself. The first time she had seen it, it had taken her three days to understand how the weapon worked, and another week to improve upon the design. If she had gone head to head with Zeke in her last lifetime under a time crunch, she would have been hard pressed to win, as he simply just had more experience than her.
Of course, that was simply not the case anymore.
“Done.” She had overestimated. It had only taken her 2 minutes and thirty seconds. She pointed the weapon at a few test dummies in the corner.
BAM!
A shockwave went out, knocking over about half of the practice dummies.
Zeke rolled his eyes, still unable to move, while Ben looked unfazed. “It doesn’t really seem very different, sorry. “
Abigail grinned.
BAM! BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM!
The remainder of the mannequins fell under the rapid fire.
“You made it capable of multiple shots!” Ben was practically jumping up and down with excitement. Zeke had turned pale, his eyes wide with shock. Abigail felt a little bad about making it seem so easy to figure out and improve his design, but remembering his attitude on meeting her, decided it was probably good for him.
“Alright that’s enough playing for one day.” With a regretful look she unfroze Zeke, who without superpowers had been unable to free himself, and waved goodbye at them.
“THIS- this isn’t over!” With a shouted threat Zeke ran out, muttering about revamping all his designs.
“Not bad, newbie.” Ronnie nodded respectfully, before following his screaming friend out.
Ben grinned. “Thanks for the good time, Abigail. As always, your work is impeccable.” He turned to leave.
“WAIT.” Abigail called out, her voice cracking with nervousness. As he paused, looking at her with a curious expression, she cleared her throat uncomfortably and continued. “I have something I need to talk to you about.”
“Sure, but why so serious?” He chuckled.
Abigail stared at him silently for a few moments, before sighing. “I’m going to need to make tea.”
She brewed some tea, and sat down across from him, uncertain of how to start.
“Hey, you know you can tell me whatever is bothering you. I may not be able to help, but I can listen.” Ben reached out to touch her hand, but she shied away. She still didn’t like close contact with him. It brought back bad memories.
“What I’m about to tell you will seem unbelievable. You may think I’m a liar, may think I’m crazy, but every word of what I’m about to say is completely true.”
She took in a deep breath.
“In my last lifetime, you killed me.”
Starting from there she told him the whole story. Her previous life as a supervillain minion. The mission the distract him. Realizing he was drugged.
Dying at his hands.
When she mentioned waking up as an eight year old again, he blinked, seeming to think of something before his expression became blank once more. The remainder of the story didn’t take long.
“So I’m still keeping in contact with Jack, but I’ve switched sides, hoping to take him down this time.”
“… Is it solely for revenge?” He asked her, his eyes still strangely blank.
“What do you mean?”
“Do you think the only reason you were reborn was to take revenge?”
Abigail held up her hands in a helpless gesture. “I can’t think of any other reason for me to have a second chance like this. So the real question is, will you help me?”
Ben shook his head. “I won’t help you kill him. But it does seem like the world would be a better place with him behind bars. I help you with that.”
“It won’t be easy.” Abigail warned. “He has some sort of power over people. He can make anyone his ally. It’s why he was so successful as a super villain last time. “
“Do you have a plan?”
“I have several. It just depends on how he decides to move.”
“Okay.” Ben stood up. “I need to think all this through. Can we talk more tomorrow?”
Abigail stood up as well. “Sure.” She paused, reaching out to shake his hand. “Thanks for believing me.”
He shook it, seeming to sigh quietly. “No problem.”
With that he was gone.
Abigail sat back down, groaning. “I did it.”
She told Ben the truth.
And he believed her. She now had an ally, and Jack had lost his only piece of leverage. This time she would defeat him.  This time she would live.
The sensation of dying overwhelmed Abigail once more, and she huddled into her couch, rocking back and forth.
She could only hope that defeating Jack would finally let her heart be at ease.
Ben walked quickly down the hall, ignoring all the called out greetings from his fellow heroes and support staff. His only goal, all of his focus, was on getting back to his room as soon as possible.
It can’t be.
Even as he denied it in his heart, he knew Abigail was telling the truth. Her eyes as she described her own death… no human should have those eyes, least of all a young girl like her. The hopelessness as she described how in her previous life she had been used and discarded… it made him want to break something.
He knew she had been surprised at how easily he believed her story.
As he arrived in his room, he opened a secret compartment in the back of his closet, pulling out an ornate wooden box with a complicated lock. It had been a gift from his mother, who hadn’t been human. With shaking hands he slowly unlocked and opened it.
His heart stuck in his throat.
His mother had given him a present, a bright red glowing gem.
The Gem of Fate she had called it.
He could use it once and only once to change a fate, including his own if he so chose. It would be better not to ever use it though, as changing the fate of anyone could have terrible unexpected consequences. Heeding her warning, he had locked the gem away, never touching it, never even looking at it beyond the first time.
Yet here it was.
Resting quietly in the box where he had left it.
The glow long gone.
It had been used.
He never remembered using it, and it was impossible for anyone else to try to use it. Which could only mean one thing:
Abigail’s story was accurate. He had been drugged, and murdered her in cold blood.
He then used the stone to change her fate.
Idly, he wondered when the glow had faded from the stone in this lifetime. Mostly likely when she had returned as an eight-year-old girl. It could never be used again.
And she wondered why he believed her.
It’s because he knew exactly why she got a second chance. It hadn’t been for revenge, or to have her work with him against the man who trapped both of them.
“It was for you to live a happy life.” He whispered to himself. He didn’t remember activating the power, that version of himself was lost forever. But he knew he would have done exactly the same thing under those circumstances.
Let’s live well this second time, Abigail.
He sat down in the darkness of his room, staring at the now useless gem, his thoughts on all the different possibilities.
141 notes · View notes
Note
AHSHAAUGAFAF MEGAMINDS TAIL OAO - anyways - metro mans kinda a lil bitch for being so “creeped out” at megaminds alien biology when really he probably has his own alien problems too and thats the tea
AO3
Loving The Alien (Part 12)
(trypophobia warning toward the end of the chapter)
(I also want to thank @the-megamind  for helping me generate ideas :D)
Roxanne nearly drops a pan when she hears the banging on her door. It’s obvious whoever is knocking at not even six in the morning is here for a reason, and a major one at that. Huffing, she sets the pan on the stove and wipes her hands on her robe. With shuffling feet she goes to the door.
“Who’s th—“
“Miss Ritchi!” The robotic screech of Minion’s suit voice tore through the door with clear agitation.
She blinked rapidly, because one, how on earth did Minion get up the flight of stairs, or the elevator, without causing mass panic, and two, why was he here? How did he know Megamind was here (assuming that’s the reason he’s here)? Without another thought she unlocked her door and found—she found not Minion, but also Wayne, standing in his superhero get-up with the most miserable look on his face.
“Can…I help you two?”
Minion, without saying another word, marched past her into her apartment with barely a second look. She opened her mouth to protest, but Wayne was following Minion’s lead by more or less forcing himself inside uninvited.
“SIR!” Minion belows, spinning around in his suit’s bowl head as he searched for his friend. “SIR, I’M HERE!”
Roxanne pinched the bridge of her nose. She had no patience for nonsense this morning but it was clear Minion wasn’t here to kidnapping. Clearly. Megamind said so himself he was stopping that. But did Minion know? Did he know why his boss/friend was hiding here with her?
“What are you guys doing here?” She hissed at Wayne, pulling her robe tighter around her when his eyes drifted below his face (her sleep tank top wasn’t the most modest thing).
“When you said… uh… that the little guy was all right now, I kind of went searching for Minion.”
She stared at him.
“Turns out he was looking for him too!”
She sighs. Honestly, a very selfish part of her just wanted to spend a lazy day off work with none other than Megamind. However she knew that the one who knew Megamind best was not her, not in the slightest. So Roxanne motioned to Minion, and says, “He’s up in my room.”
Minion doesn’t so much as give her another second because he’s already storming up the stairs with his big mechanical gorilla feet. She winces, hearing the stairs creek in his wake.
“SIR,” Minion yells again and throws the door open before vanishing inside. If Minion wasn’t a literal (alien) fish, Roxanne would feel terrified of a man throwing himself into her bedroom like hell in a suit. But, this was Minion and had probably spent more time with her unconscious than anything.
She hears Megamind squawk in surprise, and then Minion is marching back out again with him thrown over his shoulder. Megamind kicks his limbs and shouts, “Damn you! Put me down!”
“This is so inappropriate, sir!” Minion cried. “In Miss Ritchi’s bed?! WHY didn’t you call me when you lost your tail again!?”
“PUT ME DOWN, MINION.”
They’re yelling, now, with Megamind climbing all over this friend’s impossibly large robotic suit and Minion trying to grab Megamind by the waist to keep him still. Megamind is clumsy, though, and she can tell the “phantom pain”, as he put it, is evident as he tries to regain his balance.
“Okay, stop! Both of you!” She yells. Both of them turn to her with wide eyes. “Minion, there’s nothing to worry about. Megamind’s just been resting here.”
“And that’s incredibly unethical!”
“Don’t be a prune, Minion,” Megamind grumbles, having been caught and forcefully squeezed into a bridal position. It would be almost comical, seeing him struggle in the big mechanical arms of his friend, but right now all she worried about was Megamind being “kidnapped” in a weird scene, or his tail stub to start bleeding from all the struggling.
“What are you even DOING here!?” The fish asks, clearly in distress. Roxanne finally takes pity on him and sending a glance to Wayne, who looks just about ready to leave as quickly as possible, she walks over to Minion to insist he put Megamind down.
“Minion, it’s okay. We had… a date last night.”
The fish looked at her like she was the weirdest one in the room.
“A date,” he echoes.
“Not really,” Megamind whines. “Before anything happened, Mr. Elephant here showed up.”
“Look, little buddy…”
“Don’t even start with me.”
“Mr. Scott informed me that he caught you two in a very inapt position,” Minion barked, to which Megamind blew air out of his cheeks, blushing lilac. “I’m taking you back home now, Sir. Enough playing.”
Both she and Megamind jolt. “For one, I’m not playing, and you can’t tell me what to do,” the blue alien whined. “I’m quite…” he glances at her, a clear question in his eyes. She nodded. “I’m quite comfortable here!”
“Sir, this is completely—“
“Minion, this is SO not your place—“
“I’m sure Miss Ritchi has to go to her job, now! She’s much too busy for—“
“She’s taking a sick day!”
“Miss Ritchi doesn’t know how to care for you like I—“
“We ate together!”
This was not the response she’d expect from Megamind to quiet Minion. Yet it was everything that needed to be known, or at least understood, for the otherworldly fish. His jaw dropped open, a few bubbles exiting his mouth. She shared a glance with Wayne over the unfolding scene.
And then the little fish grits his fangs. Roxanne knows without a doubt these two are going to be fighting, and it probably shouldn’t be anything she or Wayne should be privy to. So, she takes the more humanoid alien by the hand and leads him to the balcony. Once outside, she shuts the door behind her. Immediately the two inside start yelling. Oh, boy, she thought gloomy. Megamind hadn’t mentioned their new relationship status at all.
“So… you and him?”
“Yes. Is that a problem?”
“But, he’s… Megamind. I can’t really imagine him as the boyfriend type.”
“You’d be surprised.”
When she heard a chair being knocked over, she winced. So did Wayne, but he covers his head in his hands.
“If your superhearing is that bothered, then you shouldn’t have come.”
He frowns. “Look… Roxie, I know it’s not really my business, but…” He winces again.
And Roxanne understands his pain. The physical pain, that is.
They’ve known each other for a while. Actually, a little longer than she’s known Megamind. After all he was the one to originally kidnap her because of her affiliation with Metro Man.
It goes to say that she and Wayne are somewhat like friends. Sometimes he’s taken her out for coffee after a particularly grueling kidnapping, or they’ve gone out for sushi, a shared enjoyment (she tended to avoid fish-based things after years of knowing her two serial kidnappers [that is, apparently, until now]).
She’s seen his little hideout by the bay, under this old one-room schoolhouse.
So, naturally, it wasn’t strange for them to pick up on the little things in the other. Quirks. Pet peeves. Hobbies. Tastes. Strange alien abilities she’d never guess.
Ooh yes. Wayne was so not off the hook for last night. No way. Not after what happened with Megamind. Especially so, since Wayne wasn’t one to talk.
So, yes, Wayne, she thought to herself bitterly, you had no room to talk about Megamind’s alienness. He has his own little alien quirk, too.
“If you make one nasty comment, one, on our relationship I am throwing you over the balcony myself.”
“That’s not gonna—“
“I don’t care, and you better apologize to him.”
“It’s not—“
“You removed his tail.”
“It comes off on its own!”
“How is that any less wrong!?”
She hears something being turned over in her living room, and with a great strength, she holds herself from turning around to look inside. She did trust Megamind enough not to turn her home into a complete disaster. More or less. Yet before she can say anything she hears, in a loud insisting yell, “Well maybe I don’t want to be the bad guy anymore!”
And then Minion’s squeal of shock.
And then a long silence.
And then the sound of the front door opening and slamming shut.
She waits there for a whole second before the glass doors open.
“Roxanne,” Megamind states. She turns around and swallows.
He’s looking a little worse for wear. Clearly the signs of a passionate fight show on his face, with puffy purple cheeks and ears. He hangs his head and steps aside from the entrance way. “It’s just me, now.”
“Are you okay?” She asked awkwardly, tentatively touching his shoulder. He shrugs, giving her little information as to what just happened between them. She and Wayne follow him inside, watching him collapse on the sofa.
She quickly moves to sit beside him. He looks so tired, now. He pouts, with his brows scrunched together so hard she wonders if he’ll hurt his face.
“Do you want breakfast?” She asks him, patting his head.
“Sure,” he sighs, but pressed against her in a loose fetal position and closes his eyes. Not sparing a glance at Wayne, or even warning him for what she’s about to do, she tugs his sleep pants down an inch to expose his stump. He grunts but doesn’t move her.
It’s still the same dark pink color, not as glossy anymore but still puffy with the blood pumping through his slim body. She’s been keeping an eye on it this whole time, but even so, she wants to cry or cringe because this appendage she’s so accustomed to seeing is literally gone. It’s just gone. Not forever, but it’s… gone.
Wayne looks away.
Good, she thinks bitterly. Let him see it. She gently pulls the elastic band back up, this time letting it pop his skin a little. It’s ineffective.
When she leaves the couch in favor of making him something to eat (and for herself), she gives Wayne a look and crosses her arms. “You need to apologize to him. Big time. For all the times!”
He rubs the back of his neck.
She picks up a spray can of olive oil and coats a pan, quietly placing it on the stove because as much a she felt like slamming it down, Megamind was already asleep on the couch.
“Things are changing, Wayne,” she sighs, pulling a carton of eggs and a variety of vegetables and other foodstuffs out of her fridge. “He’s already trying to accept that. You need to, too.”
He sits at her bar and is just… quiet. For a long time, as she’s already whipping eggs together in a bowl with chopped onions, spinach, pepper, tomatoes, and cheese, the apartment is eerily quiet for once, with the only sounds being her puttering around.
With the omelet starting to fry on the pan, Wayne finally moves off the stool.
Out of the corner of her eye, still hovering over the stove with her spatula in hand, she watches him approach the other alien by crouching down beside him.
“Hey… Blue…”
She briefly wondered where the naming of his color of skin came from and wondered if Megamind would see that as if a white person called an African “Black”. However, when Megamind opened one eye, face half pressed into her red cushions, he regarded this life-long energy with just a suspicious glare.
“Look. I’m sorry about last night. I may have overreacted….”
She’s two seconds from blowing up on “may have”, but Megamind beats her to it by saying, quite quietly, “One time too many. Five times I can count, including last night.”
“Those times happened as kids, man.”
“Tell that to the growing pains, jack hat.”
She knows he’s being literal, Roxanne thinks with a wince.
Wayne smacks his lips and gives a glance to Roxanne. She glares and just vigorously nods her head.
“Look… I think half the reason we all really felt… threatened by you was your—“
“Yes, yes, my appearance,” Megamind hisses, sitting up now. His borrowed top slips off one of his slender blue shoulders, the one with a tattoo. “The tail. The extra fingers. The eyes. The teeth,” he bares them. “Not to mention the time I lost my tail or had my shoes stolen.”
Why would stolen shoes be so bad?
“You,” Megamind goes on, laying on the truth very, very thickly. “You were Mr. Perfect, all smiles and charm and charismatic heroism. Winning the other chee-ildren with a single look. Despite your freakish strength and powers, they all flocked to you, didn’t they? Oh, no, no one could hate Mr. Perfect. Not him! Not even if secretly all the other children had somewhat of a fear for an indestructible child, in which no-one could stop if he had so much as a temper tantrum!”
The room is so quiet that Roxanne thinks she can hear her own heartbeat.
Wayne stands up. He hangs his head. “I’m sorry. I really am. But… would you believe me if I said I was jealous?”
Megamind doesn’t buy it for a second and leans over to rest his chin on his fists. “Oh? Was it my incredible genius that intimidated your tiny mind?”
“No. It was because your alien abilities weren’t as freakish as mine!”
Megamind stares at him. “How so?”
Wayne tries to search Roxanne’s eyes for somewhat of a backup. And though she is still furious at him, she does nod and encourages him silently.
Wayne then brings his hand up to his head and runs his fingers through his graying hair, moving away a chunk of greased locks to expose the hundreds of tiny, little holes in his scalp.
Megamind says nothing, and sits very still.
“They’re… ears. Like. I can hear basically everything in this city. It’s frustrating as heck! And not to mention ear wax. This sounds disgusting but most of the time my hair looks this good is because of the wax. It’s—ew. I know.”
“Is that all?” Megamind is massaging his temples now, but in no way does he appear to be grossed out. Or even that tased.
“Um… not really. No. But. Look. I’m saying sorry. And I really mean it.”
He say nothing. He turns and his eyes meet with Roxanne, but for once she doesn’t know what to say to this. This is between them. It’s probably not even okay for her to be present for this conversation, but she does need to make him something to ea—OH SHIT, she’s forgotten the omelet. She throws herself over to the oven and flips it, cursing as it’s scorched on the bottom.
As for what happened next between the two aliens, she is not privy to, because when she turns around Wayne is leaving through the balcony.
She scavenges the good parts of the omelet and fills a glass with organic orange juice. Walking over to him, she gives him a look over. He’s hunched over, still massaging his temples.
When she sits beside him does he finally look at her.
“I’m on better terms with him,” he nods to the balcony, “than with my best friend.”
She brings a hand up to rub his back, balancing the plate on her lap. “Minion… is quite protective of you.”
“You’ve no idea. I fear I’ve kept this from him for too long for him to take it easy.”
“He’ll come around. You two are the closest friends I’ve ever known.”
He smiles ruefully at this.
She runs her hand down his back once more. He’s so slim she can feel the ridges of his spin. Is that normal? “Here. Eat something,” she offers the plate.
He takes the plate but keeps it where their thighs are touching. “Eat with me.”
“Anything you need.”
“We need. You haven’t had anything to eat since last afternoon? If you hadn’t already had dinner. I saw your news report before coming to look for you.”
“Oh?” She chuckles. “And how did you find me?”
He turns purple. “I may… have a few brain bots around the city to alert me of your wear-a-boots.”
She shakes her head, but can’t find an atom in her to feel creeped out. As long as they were in this together, it felt like nothing could tear them apart.
5 notes · View notes
andrewmoocow · 5 years
Text
Gravity Soul chapter 12: Mabel’s Confession, A Rift Between Siblings? (originally posted on January 21, 2019)
AN: Well, this is going to be pretty painful for me to write. I mean, MABEL is my favorite Gravity Falls character, not going to lie. But I'm starting to get the hang of angst ever since I finished Secret Wars so I guess I have no choice. Anyway, now onto the eventual heartwrenching breakup.
IHFR L BIOI EDEF FFDNT
E DTOPXTZG TXLD LFECZS
XLLF IT OPBT DSYOEBPPP
BFGZYET LLLASHZGS XLPZ RFZPMLFH
In the hellish landscape ruled by Kishin Cipher that once was the sleepy Oregon town of Gravity Falls, various ogres, giant bats, snakes, gargoyles and various other monsters ran amok wreaking havoc wherever they could while their new master towered above them partying in his Fearamid.
There was little hope of resistance as most of the townsfolk had been abducted & petrified by the Eyebats with the rest nowhere to be found. But today, that was all going to change.
"Keep moving everyone, Kishin Cipher could be watching us at any moment." Sid commanded his squadron as they infiltrated the Fearamid, trying to be as quiet as possible to avoid detection. "We should be nearing his throne room at any moment. The monsters hanging out with him are too busy throwing a party to notice us, so we should be safe."
"So what's this guy's game?" a blonde-haired young man with a casual expression on his face asked. "Didn't you pay attention to the mission briefing Clay?" his partner, a black-haired fellow wearing glasses and a jacket with Death's face emblazoned on them, stated. "Kishin Cipher is actually Asura after he made a deal with a dream demon named Bill Cipher."
"We should be at the entrance right about now." Justin declared with his back against the wall turning his head to examine the satanic festivities. Various demons of all shapes and sizes laughed, danced, drank some bizarre refreshment and played a spin-the-bottle like game with a petrified townsperson.
"This is an utter nightmare." Tezca commented fearfully, a far cry from his typical humorous behavior. His simian partner Enrique tried to lighten the mood with some chattering, but was shushed by his Meister. "Shush Enrique, we gotta keep a low profile!"
"That's not all, look over there!" Mifune stated turning the group's attention to Kishin Cipher's throne. It seemed to be made out of stone but upon further inspection, that stone material was actually the terrified population of Gravity Falls pieced together to form it. "That is just terrible! What kind of monster would be sick enough to do this?!"
"Kishin Cipher, that's who." Djinn replied. Just then, a dark blue android marched past them with a cup of punch in hand. "The hell even is that thing?" Tsar wondered getting more nervous by the moment. "I don't know. But I got a plan!" an excitable soldier working under Sid declared marching out of their hiding spot to face the robot. "Gavin you moron!" Sid cried out. "You'll get yourself killed!"
"Don't worry boss, I watched way too much TV to figure this one out!" Gavin stated tapping the machine on the back. "Ex-squeeze me my good mechanical abomination!" he said to the automaton as it turned around to glare at him, green eyes glowing menacingly. "Bah-weep-Graaaaagnah wheep ni ni bong!" Gavin politely greeted while making a series of bizarre hand signals, ending it with extending his open palm to the robot. "I think it's working."
Unfortunately he was wrong as the android quickly grabbed him by the wrist and raised him up for Kishin Cipher to see. "Master, we have an intruder!" the android announced in a British accent. The other beasts ceased their celebrations and stared at the man being held hostage. "I said the universal greeting, that always works!"
"Well well well, what have we here?" Kishin Cipher snidely asked before looking at the back of Gavin's uniform. "The DWMA, huh? Ooh, I'm really scared!" he shouted with a laugh. "C'mon out you guys, I won't bite! In fact, I'll probably swallow you whole!"
Suddenly Kishin Cipher was trapped in a guillotine, the blade hanging above him with Justin Law's face appearing as a reflection on its surface. "In the name of Lord Death, you shall be executed you beast!" he declared bringing the blade down when suddenly, Cipher let out an explosion that freed him from the young Death Scythe's grasp. "That the best you can do squirt?! I've seen twelve-year olds hit me harder than that!"
When Justin recovered from being blown back, part of his face was badly scarred and his left shoulder almost singed off. He groaned in pain grasping his shoulder as Kishin Cipher towered above him, ready for the finishing blow. "So brat, where is your god now?"
Justin replied by getting down on one knee and reciting a prayer. "O God who dost abide in the city of death, hear our prayers. Let thy holy name be righteousness." he muttered as his soul began getting larger. "Hear me O Lord...make me a servant of thy holy peace...I shall be a pillar of righteousness...a blade of faith...in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost..." He bounded high above Kishin Cipher and prepared to fire a mighty beam of light. "LAW-ABIDING SILVER GUN!"
The beam went straight to Kishin Cipher's neck but instead of decapitating him, reality warped around the Dream Kishin to divert the beam away from him and right through Justin's torso, causing him to fall down on the floor of the Fearamid hard. "You know kid, I quite like you. Can't believe someone actually came close to killing me!" he applauded sarcastically hovering over the wounded Justin as an Eyebat turned his bloodied form to stone. "Which is why I got a very special place for you on my throne!"
With an irritating cackle, Kishin Cipher slammed Justin on the back of the throne directly over his head. "Now then, anyone else want a round with me? Or are we all just chicken?" he challenged as Kaguya, White Rabbit, Moonlight and the Black Clown appeared at his beck and call.
"I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart, sorry for screwing this all up." Gavin sincerely apologized as he was petrified and added to the throne as well. "Well this has become FUBAR!" Dengu commented preparing to run away. "Indeed, we should retreat somewhere where he can't find us and wait for the Pines to come!" Zubaidah added making her escape as well when the Clowns blocked the way. "Or not."
"That's right gang, round them all up! I wanna send a message to old man Death!" Kishin Cipher announced as his minions surrounded the remaining spies. "Uh, K.C., we have a bit of a situation." Giriko announced to his master. "Okay, what is it Buzzsaw?" the overlord asked, his expression changing from sadistic to unamused. "There seems to be more intruders coming for us." the Demon Saw stated. "And I think you might recognize them."
Just as Giriko finished, a pterodactyl came flying in through the window behind the throne with a familiar werewolf & witch riding on its back. "You two?!" Kishin Cipher screamed in shock. "I believe now's the time we bring out the belt!" Free declared preparing his magic. "Wolf, wolves! Wolf, wolves!" he chanted. "Ice Bind!"
Ice began forming around Kishin Cipher's feet, its sheer weight trapping him on the ground. "Good one Free!" Eruka shouted as the pterosaur landed in front of Sid's group. "Holy crap, is that a pterodactyl?!" Tezca shouted in amazement. "I think that looks more like a pteranodon." Feodor replied. "Hey wait a minute, you are Medusa's goons, da?"
"We were." Eruka said stroking their flying steed's beak for a job well done. It was here that Sid began to take notice of the question mark shirt Free was now wearing. "I know that symbol! You wouldn't happen to know any strange hairless gopher manchildren?" the zombie asked. "Gophers? Don't think I ever met any gophers?" the Man with the Demon Eye answered. "Though I think that would be awesome!"
"He's talking about Soos Free! And yes, we know him and his friends, the Pines family." Eruka said. "They freed us from Medusa and we returned the favor by helping them save their friend and escape town."
"But isn't that against witch law?" Djinn wondered. "We don't got no time, let's make like the wind and begone!" Free commanded before they all saddled up on the pterodactyl and it flew out of the triangular opening in the front. "Now why didn't we enter through there?"
As the group retreated, Kishin Cipher became so furious that the ice imprisoning his feet rapidly melted and he literally exploded in anger. "THEY DARE RUN AWAY LIKE THAT?! NOT ON MY WATCH!" he screamed. "AFTER THEM!" At his command, the Henchmaniacs, the Four Madnesses & the Clowns flew off with an army of Eyebats behind them.
The pterosaur flew as fast as it could away from the Fearamid before the army of monsters finally caught up to them. "We're going to need to go long-range! Zubaidah, now!" Djinn ordered his Meister transforming into a small oil lamp with an ornate design. "Soul Resonance!"
When the belly dancer rubbed the lamp, out came a puff of smoke that formed into a genie folding his arms with a firm glare. Suddenly Kryptos fired a laserbeam that the genie punched away with a loud "ORA!", blinding one of the Eyebats. "ORA! ORA!" the genie continued screaming taking out more of the Eyebats. "ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA-ORA!"
Eventually when the Eyebats were all plucked off, the genie began setting his sights on Kishin Cipher's main minions. He started with the Henchmaniacs, punching out Xanthar, Amorphous Shape, Keyhole and Lavalz, making them scream like a crocodile bit them or they were shot off a ledge as they fell towards the forest.
In one desperate move, Teeth grabbed onto one of the pterodactyl's wings and bit down hard, causing the creature to lose balance and Djinn's lamp form to fall out of his Meister's hands. "Galland!" Zubaidah cried out for her weapon, but he was more accepting of his fate. "My dear, it has been an honor." he calmly thanked her before his fall was broken by a recovering Eyebat petrifying him as payback.
The pteranodon meanwhile made an emergency landing somewhere far away from the Dream Kishin's soldiers. "Aw, did the bad tooth man hurt you Princess Buttercup?" Free cooed to their steed. "Don't worry, a few kisses will take the ouches away!"
"You can cut it with the baby talk, it won't be long before they catch up to us." Mira interrupted tending to Buttercup's wound. "Think you might have spoke too soon!" Eruka cried looking up into the sky as the remaining beasts touched down on the ground to corner them. "Three down, and the rest of you to go!" the Madness of Envy snarled with a wide toothy grin. "Now which one goes first?"
"We shall hold them off, you go run for cover!" Mifune ordered the rest of the group as he, Tsar, Feodor, Tezca and Enrique prepared for battle. "And Sid, watch over Angela for me." the samurai said regretfully as he set his young witch companion down, as if he knew he wasn't going to make it.
With that, the rest of the party ran off away from the monsters while more of them appeared and the fates of the others left unknown.
"Mr. Sid, what's gonna happen to Mifune?" Angela asked the zombie. Sid was silent the whole way through as they fled.
Meanwhile back in Death City, the Pines twins were sitting in Class Crescent Moon while Stein gave another lecture. Mabel was aimlessly drawing pictures on her paper while Dipper was hard at work, his stacks of notes almost reaching the ceiling. "Mabel, can you pay attention please?"
"Aw come on Dipper, we've already heard most of this stuff from back in Gravity Falls!" Mabel replied. "Is that so? Tell us, what did Stein teach you?" a voice belonging to a young man wearing thick glasses who seemed to be bald except for a pair of horns on his head. "He taught us lots of cool stuff, like wavelengths and resonances and all that junk!" the sweater girl said. "Hey, hate to trail off but your hair looks kinda funny."
"For your information, they are my pillars!" their fellow student hotly declared. "Wait, pillars? Are you serious?" Wendy asked suddenly butting in. "I think we should all just keep quiet, including you Ox." Maka added. "Ox? That seems like a fitting name." Dipper remarked before the five of them were interrupted by Stein throwing a scalpel just above Mabel's head, cutting off a few strands of hair. "Whatever you were talking about, I suggest you finish and then get back to work."
"Very well then. The three of you meet me after class, where we shall settle things." Ox declared returning to note taking. The twins nodded in agreement, eager to test their skills against an established Meister like him. Wendy on the other hand just looked on in confusion just wondering what she got herself into.
"So you guys are gonna fight Ox?" Black Star gasped after class. "You guys have your work cut out for you, he's one of the top students of our class!"
"Yeah, all because he got mad at Mabel for insulting his hair." Dipper answered. "I'm sorry guys, just thought I could point that out!" his sister added. "And by the way, those pictures I was drawing during class were of cool battle outfits for all of us." With a grin, she pulled out that paper with all her designs on it.
"Am I wearing a ninja suit?" Dipper wondered. "Loving the flannel skirt on me!" Wendy added. "You really got a knack for designing kid! Want some help making those?" Liz offered. "Sure, the more the merrier you guys!" the younger girl gratefully replied. "And I'll come along as well. Trust me, you're gonna need someone with a sense of fashion like mine." Pacifica interjected. "All right, fashion team is a go!"
After a long montage of clothes-designing, the combat uniforms were completed and ready to be modeled. "Okay gang, you all ready?" Mabel asked to Dipper & Wendy while they were inside a pair of changing booths. "I don't know sis. Hate to admit it, but our outfits look kinda ridiculous in real life." Dipper confessed. "I mean, my suit is just a bit too skintight and what's the point of this scarf?"
"Dude, this is Mabel we're talking about. I'm sure these will look good in action." Wendy answered. "Well, here goes nothing."
Finally stepping out of the booth, Wendy was now clad in a pine green high collar halter top with a pair of black straps crossing over her chest with a snowflake symbol connecting in the middle. Beneath the red flannel skirt that went down to her knees were a pair of black shorts with matching thigh-high stockings to go with her regular boots. She also had an orange over-shirt that opened to reveal her snowflake badge and her hair was in a ponytail. "Dude, this is killer!"
Dipper finally relented and stepped out as well, revealing a dark blue ninja suit with a white pine tree symbol on the chest, a red scarf covering his mouth, black boots and Excalibur's custom scabbard resting on his back. "This isn't as bad as I thought I would be."
"They do look quite good on you." Death the Kid commented. "I agree! The clothes do bring out your respective personalities." Tsubaki added. "And I've already made a uniform for myself! Wait here everyone!" Mabel stated before she ran off. After a few more minutes, she returned wearing a magenta top with black string holding it together, a dark pink undershirt, pink belt, purple skirt with her famous shooting star pattern, white stockings and black boots. Overall, it was a fancier version of her usual attire.
"You think a scythe would go well with this look?" Mabel asked pulling at her skirt. "Aw who cares? I did a pretty good job on it anyway!"
"Now then, let's settle things with that Ox guy." Dipper declared sheathing Excalibur. "You ready Excalibur?" he asked his sword. "FOOL! Of course I'm ready boy, whether you wear a ridiculous outfit or not!" Excalibur declared, much to the boy's embarrassment.
Later that day outside of the academy's entrance, the fight was about to begin with Ford, Stein, Spirit, Marie & Azusa present as per school rules and the other Mystery Meisters spectating. On one side were Dipper, Mabel & Wendy in their new combat uniforms.
On the other side was Ox along with another black-haired student wearing a red-tinted visor & a permanent frown. The other Meister-Weapon teams with the two boys was a black male with two much smaller youths dressed in matching overalls with colored caps standing below him and a pink haired girl in a sailor uniform standing beside a similarly dressed brunette lass.
"Who are all those other guys with Ox?" Wendy asked. "Those are some of our other classmates." Maka answered. "That's Ox's weapon Harvar D. Eclair right next to him, then there's Kilik Rung & his twin weapons Fire and Thunder, and finally Kim & her weapon Jackie."
"I don't know about this Ox. All this because one of the new guys insulted your pillars?" Harvar commented. "I know this may seem petty my friends, but I feel I have been dealt a great injustice." Ox stated. "Harvar's right, we should just call this off." Kilik agreed. "But then again, they could use some training."
"So which one of us should go first?" Mabel asked. "We could draw straws, pull out a wheel to spin or maybe rock-paper-scissors." she suggested. "Let's go with rock-paper-scissors." her brother declared pounding his fist into his palm and the girls did the same before tossing their hands out while chanting "ROCK PAPER SCISSORS!"
The trio's game of roshambo began as the three continued chanting, much to the confusion of the audience. "Are they for real?" Kim deadpanned staring blankly at their three opponents. "Whatever, I call dibs on the one with the flannel skirt."
"I shall challenge the girl with the braces." Kilik replied. "Guess that leaves me with Dipper." Ox stated as the game ended with Dipper winning out. "Yes, I get to go first!" he cried in excitement before he prepared for battle. "So then, you ready Ox?"
"You bet I'm ready." his opponent stated as Harvar transformed into a spear with a lighting bolt shaped tip in his hands. "Let the battle between Dipper Pines and Ox Ford & Harvar D. Eclair begin!" Azusa announced. Within seconds, the two went from staring each other down to charging with battle cries as their weapons clashed. "For someone who's new to being a Meister, you aren't too bad!" Ox commented.
"And I see you're talented at it!" Dipper replied. "But the only difference, my weapon is the strongest in the world!" he boasted, much to Ox's surprise. "Wait, you mean your sword is..." It wasn't long before the pillar boy put on the Excalibur face.
"Do not let your hatred of Excalibur distract you Ox! Find an opening and strike!" Harvar exclaimed. "Try using anything metal on his person as an electrical conduit!"
"Okay, you do realize that explaining your strategies in front of an opponent is a bad idea, right?" Dipper remarked being pushed back by the Lightning King. "In that case, here's some of my own!" Within seconds, the boy disappeared & reappeared behind his opponent, giving his a mighty jab in the back. The two clashed once more to the point of exhaustion and they panted heavily, taking a knee.
"You're wide open!" Ox shouted and he & Harvar declared "LET'S GO, SOUL RESONANCE!" in unison, turning the blade into a powerful cutting tool that went at Dipper at the speed of light, but the boy was quick and leaped upward, preparing one final attack. "HERO THE ATOMIC!"
With a mighty zoom, Excalibur made contact with Ox causing him to explode and knocking him to the ground. "Ox Ford and Harvar D. Eclair are no longer able to fight, marking Dipper Pines as the winner of the match!" Asuza announced gesturing to the aforementioned victor. The young detective jumped for joy in celebration before he noticed Ox struggling to get up, and offered his hand. "You fought well Ox. Sorry about what we said about your hair."
"Apology accepted." Ox replied taking the Pines brother's hand. "But how are you able to wield Excalibur and not get so pissed off by him?" he asked. "Trust me, I've dealt with a lot of people like him." Dipper said slinging the Holy Sword over his shoulder. "Okay, who wants to go next?"
"I'll take a shot." Wendy accepted getting into a fighting stance with her left hand holding her axe behind her and her right in front. "You ready Jackie?" Kim said to her weapon as she transformed into a lantern. "You bet I am Kim!"
"Let the battle between Wendy Corduroy and Kim Diehl & Jacqueline O'Lantern Dupre begin!" Ford declaring taking his turn as referee before Kim made her first move, pulling a metal bar with a chain attached to it out of the lamp and taking herself sky-high like she were riding a broomstick.
"Damn, she's got a good advantage!" Wendy muttered trying to think of a way to bring her back down to the ground. She then looked at her axe and smirked, tossing it at the Meister hoping to send her crashing. But suddenly Kim made the flames spouting out of her weapon erupt, knocking the axe back to its owner and hitting Wendy on the arm. "Someone's playing dirty!"
"Quick, while she's down!" Jackie exclaimed as her Meister returned to the ground. As quick as the girl could run, she whipped out her lantern and used it as a flamethrower on Wendy, causing her to start screaming like crazy and rolling around to put out the fire. "Wendy Corduroy is no longer able to fight, making Kim Diehl & Jacqueline O'Lantern the winners!" Ford announced. "Are you okay there Wendy?!" Dipper called out to his teenage friend. "I'm fine everyone, just a few probably/hopefully first-degree burns."
"I think I can help with that. Just stay still for a bit." Kim said putting her hands on her opponent's arm. "Are you really sure about this Kim, especially in front of academy staff?" her weapon fretted. However the Lantern Meister didn't listen as she began to chant. "Tanucoon, Raccoon-coon, Ponpon, Ponkitanu."
Within seconds, Wendy's burns vanished and she was completely back to normal. "Whoa, what did you just do?!" she exclaimed. "Are you a-"
"Witch, I know." Kim stated resignedly. "Aha, she was right!" Ford exclaimed triumphantly. "That's one witch in hiding down, now who else could there be? I'm getting mighty suspicious of those two ladies from Chu-" Ford then realized everyone glaring at him before he fell silent. "Terribly sorry."
"It's all right if you're a Witch or not Kim, cause you're still our friend." Maka stated warmly. "Okay peoples, let's get the final round over with!" Mabel exclaimed. "I suppose you might be the last guy?" she asked Kilik and his twin weapons. "Indeed I am. I wish you good luck Mabel." Kilik answered arming himself. "Let the final round between Mabel Pines and Kilik Rung & his Pots begin!" Marie announced.
"Okay, she doesn't seem like much. Unlike her brother, she doesn't seem to have a weapon besides that grappling hook of hers." Kilik examined his brightly-colored foe while she aimlessly twirled a bit of her hair. "This could perhaps be an easy match."
"Heads up!" Mabel called firing a pair of Nyarf darts at Kilik's glasses, blinding him. "What the?!" the Pot Meister exclaimed taking the darts off his eyewear to find Mabel spinning a pair of yo-yos around before she started playing with them like a pair of clackers.
"That was only a wakeup call, my next trick ain't gonna go easy on you! This is what I call my Yo-Yo Volley! HWAH!" However when Mabel tossed them in the air, they instead clashed with her head causing her to exclaim "OH NO!"
"What is up with her?" Sid exclaimed in awe of the girl's perceived foolishness. "This must be her preferred fighting style, making herself look childish to distract her opponents and going in for the kill!" Stein suggested. "That is pretty accurate." Soos responded as Kilik became more befuddled at his opponent's antics.
"Is-is there anything else you got for me?" Kilik asked before Mabel rapidly stuck a sweater over his head while shouting "SWEATER TOWN!", blinding him once more. "How does she even function?!" the Dominican boy exclaimed taking it off and preparing a Soul Resonance with his Pots. Jumping up into the air, Kilik prepared a powerful vertical strike with the left Pot now brimming with electricity.
But Mabel was quick and simply ran away from the Meister readying her grappling hook. "GRAPPLING HOOK!" she shouted hooking to his shirt and sending herself flying towards him. Kilik soon noticed the girl and slapped it away, causing her to fall down. "Still got one more shot!" she struggled to get one last attack in & fired her hook once more, managing to grab Kilik's glasses and snatch them off his face. "I can't see! I can't see!"
Finally the match was over as Mabel touched down to the ground while Kilik landed flat on his face. "Kilik Rung, Pot of Fire and Pot of Thunder are no longer able to fight, making Mabel Pines the winner!" Marie declared. "And with two wins under their belt, Dipper's team is victorious!"
"Woo, we did it!" Wendy celebrated. "We all did great out there, didn't we?" Dipper said giving his sister a high-five. "And you were pretty good too you guys." Mabel added to the three Meisters. "Thank you very much, though you still have a lot of training to do." Kim replied. "And you know what would make great training?!" Black Star suddenly chirped in. "Basketball!"
"That's a great idea Black Star, an opportunity to hone our coordination and reflexes." Ford agreed putting a hand on the ninja's shoulder. "However, I get to make the first shot. Are we clear?"
"Yes Mr. Pines." the kids chorused. "Come with us, we'll show you to the basketball court." Maka stated leading the Pines twins to their usual court.
"Okay dudes, time for some b-ball!" Soos announced at Death City's local basketball court as everyone got ready to play while Stein, Spirit, Marie and McGucket sat on the sidelines. "Okay as we promised everyone, I get the first shot. Capishe?" Ford reminded them dribbling the ball. "Good. Now heads up!"
He tossed the ball at Black Star who immediately made a break for the hoop. However Dipper was even faster and blocked the ninja before he passed it to Wendy. "Hey, I'm open!" Pacifica cried getting in Crona's path.
"It's times like there that make me long for something like the old days, wouldn't you two agree?" Spirit sighed nostalgically longing for anything similar to times long past. "Yeah, makes me wish I were a student again, where I wasn't as concerned about my age." Marie responded. "Speaking of which Stein, remember back when you would beat the snot out of anyone regardless of who they are?"
"Don't remind me." Stein stoically answered preparing to leave and taking a smoke. "Poor little Georgie, that boy simply couldn't keep hold on any longer. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to do some more important business. Catch you later."
Meanwhile the game was still in full swing with the basketball now in Mabel's hands. "Just try and get me you guys!" she challenged hoisting it over her head. "Now Mabel, dunk it!" Dipper shouted to his sister and she complied, tossing it at the hoop. But unfortunately it hit the backboard instead and whizzed toward the girl, much to her displeasure. "Oh crud."
With a mighty slam, Mabel's face made contact with the ball and she was out cold. "My word, Mabel!" Ford exclaimed as everyone stopped what they were doing to check the girl out. "Is she okay?" Tsubaki asked worried for the younger lass. "She'll be alright, just taking a dooze." McGucket stated feeling her pulse. "Has Mabel ever played basketball before?" Liz pondered. "No, I don't really think so." Dipper said. "She mostly just watches the games for the players, if you know what I mean."
While everyone was talking, Mabel continued to slumber with a large bruise on her cheek from the impact of the ball. But what she didn't expect was that this coma would change her forever.
When Mabel opened her eyes, she couldn't find her family and friends anywhere. In fact, she wasn't in Death City at all, rather in a small room inhabited only by a few chairs and a table. One of these chairs in particular was being sat on by a rather familiar being with his hands folded and head turned downward mumbling to himself "Vklqljdpl lv qrw zkdw kh vhhpv. Vklqljdpl lv qrw zkdw kh vhhpv."
"Uh, excuse me gibberish man, but where am I?" Mabel wondered looking around the room before she stared at an imitation of Michelangelo's David with Bill as the statue's head. "And why does that statue of the naked man have Bill's face on it?" Suddenly the statue became offended and came to life to shout at her. "Hey for your information pintsize, I am a work of art that looks like a naked man!"
"Vklqljdpl lv qrw zkdw kh vhhpv." the figure in the chair garbled one last time before he eerily looked up at Mabel, revealing himself to be none other than Kishin Cipher. "Why hello there Shooting Star." he politely greeted her with an equally eerie grin. "How nice of you to stop by for a chat. Have a seat my dear."
The unoccupied chair then became sentient and scooped up Mabel making her sit on it before it became a normal chair once more. "Could I interest you in some jelly babies?" he offered the girl a bowl of literal miniature infants made out of jelly that began crying loudly to Mabel's disgust. "I see you're not hungry right now kid, especially since you're now unconscious."
"Speaking of which, where am I and how did you get in my head?!" Mabel cried trying to flee but instead had numerous belts holding her down. "Oh I have my ways my sweetest Mabel." Kishin Cipher stated bringing their chairs closer together so that he could mockingly pinch her cheek. "Thing is, I'm not really here at all! And no I don't mean like this is a dream, I am simply projecting myself into your thoughts."
"Okay, you gotta stop that!" Mabel snapped taking the Dream Kishin's hand away from her face. "Oh you little starlight, never change! In fact, you kinda remind me of my own sibling." Kishin Cipher said. "Ah, I remember my baby brother Will fondly. A total square and a crybaby too. Tis a shame I had to burn him alive along with the rest of the second dimension."
"What are you implying?" the sweater girl asked nervously, fearing what he was going to say. Kishin Cipher simply grinned and gave his answer. "Do Pine Tree and Sixer know yet?"
"About what?"
"About the rift."
Suddenly the lights shorted out leaving the two completely in the dark. When they came back on, Mabel was now in a movie theater surrounded by clones of Kishin Cipher filling the seats, with two more atop a balcony. "Gotta say, we got a full house here tonight!" the first clone on the balcony remarked. "Doesn't seem like it, it's only one guy!" the second replied before they laughed loudly.
"What are we even doing here?" Mabel asked once again trying to escape. "Stay in your seat and be quiet during the movie you!" a Kishin Cipher dressed as an usher commanded shining his flashlight to make her stay seated. Finally the movie began, which turned out to be a B-movie style recap of the buildup to Weirdmageddon.
"Wiggity wiggity what's up Mabel, you would not believe how that big-nosed idiot grandpa forced me to leave my family behind and become just like him!" a more radical version of Dipper announced on the big screen stepping into the scene. "What?! You're telling me you'd rather pursue your dreams than return home with your insanely selfish sister!?" a unicorn that was supposedly playing Mabel shouted, but the real Mabel was not amused. "That is not a good choice of actor and an even worse impression of me."
"But not inaccurate! DOHOHOHO!" the Kishin Cipher clones on the balcony chortled before the main Kishin Cipher fired a blast that destroyed them and the balcony with them. "Why would you say she's a horrible choice?! Celestabellelabethabelle utterly nails the part with how horrendous she is, just like you!" K.C shouted. "Now keep quiet!"
"Yo take a chill pill sis, I'm only following my dream of being a closeted dick of a nerd! Not everything has to be about you brah!" movie Dipper argued. "It should be, I love everyone and they should love me back despite the fact I treat them like garbage!" movie Mabel shouted back. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to deliberately take the wrong backpack and cause the end of the world! Catch you later!"
"So, what do you think so far tin-teeth?" Kishin Cipher asked his mortal companion. "Have your eyes been opened yet?"
"Okay, maybe I can be a bit selfish but how you portray me here is totally not true!" Mabel critiqued. "I most definitely don't treat the people I love like trash!"
"Oh really, then think about all the "good times" you had with your brother!" Kishin Cipher angrily stated folding his arms in disgust. "Let's see, making fun of his height, manipulating him to give up all his romantic advances to fulfill your own desires, ignoring him in favor of some creep who makes out with puppets, and last but not least handing over the one thing that would ensure my dominance over the entire universe! Speaking of which, the best part should be coming up right about now."
"Oh woe is me! I have been ostracized for completely justifiable reasons!" the movie Mabel began crying in the forest. "If only there was some way to make summer last forever without the consent of everyone else!" Suddenly an actor playing Bill dressed in an insanely poorly made disguise that was literally just the time traveler Blendin Blandin with a mustache appeared. "Hello, my name is TotallynotBillCipher, and I'm here to avoid getting blamed for intentionally bringing about the end of the world!"
"That director sure picked the right guy to play that handsome devil!" Kishin Cipher praised the portrayal of Bill. "And I should know, the director is literally half of me!" he added as the flick went on. "Why hello there little girl, what can TotallynotBillCipher do for you?"
"Oh I just wish someone could come along and help me not accept the consequences of my actions!" Celestabellelabethabelle complained to TotallynotBillCipher. "I know how! Just give me that rift and I'll show you something really cool!" the other actor offered. "Okay, here is the rift that my brother was forced to not inform me about, now go off and destroy everything!"
"Yay, victory is mine! And I have you to thank for it Mabel, my new god of destruction!" TotallynotBillCipher declared shedding his disguise to reveal a horrendous CGI model of the triangle himself before Celestabellelabethabelle was beaten over the head with a sledgehammer, simulating the creation of Mabel's prison bubble. "Don't worry boys and girls, we only used a stunt double who is probably gonna spend centuries in the hospital! That's all folks, and don't forget to drink more Ovaltine!"
The film finally ended with rounds of applause all over. It was clear they were giving praise to it all except for Mabel who started booing, which ceased the cheering and caused the Kishin Ciphers to glare at her. "Hey, this person has a completely different opinion about this masterpiece from us! Let's mercilessly cyberbully her into changing her mind!"
"Yeah, I bet someone paid her to boo it!" another clone agreed which caused the unanimous praise towards the film to a full-blown riot against Mabel that chased her out the theater. "I fail to see how this is supposed to make me realize I wasn't a good person!"
"Are you really that blind squirt?!" Kishin Cipher hollered. "Perhaps you could use a familiar face to convince you." With a snap of his fingers, the angry mob vanished and in their place was an exact double of Mabel, only her hair tufts were pointier, her regular sweater was powder blue with Bill's symbol on it, sharper teeth and an overall inhumanly lankier figure. "Anti-Mabel?!"
"In the flesh my loathsome copy." Anti-Mabel declared. "Did you really think I was gone for good? Well as it turns out I've been drifting throughout the mindscape plotting my revenge which is where Kishin Cipher discovered me while he was gathering forces for his revenge. And he gave me an offer I most definitely couldn't refuse!"
"And that would be?" the good Mabel wondered before a third eye appeared on her evil counterpart's forehead. "Power in exchange for helping me with revenge on you. And that power?" Anti-Mabel stated. "Why making me into a Kishin of course!"
"Wait, is that why Asura has that weirdo third eye?" Mabel continued asking. "I always kinda thought it was become of some enlightenment nonsense." But suddenly before she could ask anymore, Kishin Cipher made her mouth disappear. "Now then prickly muffin, my newest minion here is gonna be ridin' shotgun for a bit so I want you to keep your mouth shut! Unless it's the words 'I gave the rift to the insanely handsome and intelligent Bill Cipher. I hope you can forgive me.' Understood?!"
The mouthless Pines sister shook her head which brought a smile to the two's faces. "Attagirl, you're so obedient when under pressure." Anti-Mabel grinned. "Whoa, let's not go there braceface!" Kishin Cipher exclaimed making his eyes all screwy and pulling on an imaginary tie before he returned to normal and spawned a basketball in his hand. "Happy trails Shooting Star."
With a single slamdunk, Mabel was knocked to the ground once more and finally returned to the conscious realm.
"Hey, I think she's waking up!" the familiar voice of Dipper exclaimed hopefully as his sister slowly awoken. "Oh thank goodness you're alright!" he added hugging Mabel. "Thanks Dipper."
"You know, maybe you should just sit the rest of the game out." Ford suggested sitting his great-niece down on the bench. "And maybe we can get an ice pack for you when we get home too."
"Yeah yeah, speaking of home," Mabel said finally about to confess. "there's something that I've wanted to say for ages. Remember when the rift cracked in your backpack Dipper?" she asked. "Yeah, you were still kinda to blame for it but it was just an accident. No harm no foul." her brother stated. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, that's not the whole story." the little girl revealed. "When I got super torn up about you potentially staying in Gravity Falls when the summer ended to be Ford's apprentice, I accidentally took the wrong backpack that conveniently had that rift thingy you two were all hush-hush about."
"How did she know?" Ford gasped in shock. "Wait, a rift? What's going on?" Maka wondered just as puzzled. "Anyway, when I wished for summer to last forever in came a chubby time-traveler Dipper & I met once who said he can use it to do so. But it turned out he was actually possessed by Bill."
"Meaning..." Dipper pressed on. "I gave the rift to the insanely handsome and intelligent Bill Cipher." Mabel finally revealed. "I hope you can forgive me."
"It's fine Mabel." Dipper said quietly, having now learned of what really caused Weirdmageddon. "Phew, glad to resolve that after so long!" Mabel sighed in relief. "Now then, who wants to 1v1 m-"
"I don't forgive you."
"W-w-what?"
The atmosphere of the basketball court soon turned dark as soon as Dipper said those four fateful words. Everyone was at a complete loss over what just happened. Even Soos dropped his usual jolly nature as his blood ran cold. "Oh no."
"I said I don't forgive you. Listen Mabel, I know you can be selfish at times but this is the last straw." Dipper continued, his voice remaining tranquil despite his anger. "You deliberately endangered the lives of millions of people not just across the world, but the whole universe as well, just because you wanted to stay an annoying little brat."
"Now settle down, we can just talk it out and-" Tsubaki tried to calm everyone down before she was interrupted. "We are talking this out, and we don't want any interruptions." Dipper coldly remarked returning to his sister. "You really think that you expect to be rewarded after all the horrible things you've done to the people you claim to care about? If it weren't for you, I could've had the perfect summer with a cool girlfriend and apprenticeship! But you didn't want me to be happy or chase my dreams, you only want what makes you happy like forcing me to screw with time so that you can win a stupid pig, helping you pursue a hopeless crush or making me give up your future!"
"Please Dipper, cease this insulting of your sister at once!" Ford scolded the younger boy. "This is between siblings Ford, go find your own to call out!" Dipper shouted harshly, stopping the grunkle in his tracks and bringing tears to his eyes. "I know you're angry Dipper, but please don't take this out on your family!" Mabel exclaimed. "Besides you're one to talk for me being selfish! Remember Summerween or when you were jealous of me being taller than you?!"
"Okay, you're right on those but at least they didn't lead me to intentionally hand over the one thing that Bill wanted to use to destroy the universe!" Dipper screamed hotly. "Okay, you must break it up immediately!" Tsubaki ordered. "You're better than this Tsubaki, don't side with someone who'll take you for granted like Mabel!" the boy continued ranting. "Well then stop making everyone go against me!" Mabel replied just as furious. "You'll only abandon them because you love ditching the ones who care about you!"
"We aren't taking sides, we just want you to resolve this peacefully!" Kid shouted. "But how can we..." the twins said in unison. "WHEN YOU'RE BENT ON RUINING MY LIFE?!"
All was silent in the court once more until Dipper made one last declaration. "For someone who claims to be a good person, you sure are no better than Bill."
"I was going to say the same to you." Mabel choked before she ran off crying. "Mabel, please come back! I'm sorry for what I said, I was just blind!" her brother exclaimed giving chase. "Please just listen!"
Again the basketball court was deathly calm, everybody remaining staring in disbelief over what just occurred. It was only that the silence broke when Soos said two words he never thought he would say. "Holy shit."
"Wait, did Dipper say 'screw with time'? What did you do last summer?!" Maka exclaimed. The author remained silent for a few more moments to collect his thoughts, no doubt believing he was the only one at fault for making Dipper keep the rift's existence between the two of them, before he sighed.
"I think it's time we had a talk." He, Soos and Wendy sat down on the bench as the DWMA kids gathered around them like grandchildren excited to hear stories from their grandpa. "Now our story begins like most stories do with an attractive youth dreaming of more. This one in particular is about a strapping young genius and his perpetual motion machine."
"I'm truly sorry Mr. Pines, but what just transpired reminds me. I must have a word with my father about something." Kid said racing back to the academy. "What's he running off for?" Crona wondered. "That's another story entirely," Ford answered. "but for now, let's focus on this one."
"Just listen Mabel, we both have every right to get mad!" Dipper exclaimed as he lost track of Mabel more and more. Eventually when he ran out of breath, he stopped in the middle of the street and sat on some steps to silently cry over the ruination of their bond. Suddenly a door opened followed by a familiar voice. "Something the matter Dipper?"
"Oh, hello Professor Stein!" Dipper hurriedly exclaimed rising to his feet, getting a good look at his current location, a rather blocky grey-colored building decorated with stitches and arrows. "How did I get so far away from the city?" he wondered to himself before turning to the mad scientist. "Uh, is this your place sir?"
"Why yes, it's my lab." Stein answered throwing away a burnt out cigarette. "Would you like to come in?" he offered the lad. "Why of course doctor, your lab must seem really cool!" Dipper excitedly accepted following Stein inside. "Thank you Dipper. And please, just call me Frank."
The interior of the lab looked very ominous representing the Meister's emotionless love of science but also seemed a bit homely at the same time with sofas and a coffee table. But the most peculiar furnishing was a pair of disembodied hands being pickled inside a jar labeled "George R", much to Dipper's confusion as he picked up the jar. "Uh, who's George?"
"Don't touch, don't ask." Stein coldly ordered him taking the jar away. "Understand?" Dipper wordlessly nodded before he laid down on the nearby couch. "Now tell me, what is happening between you and Mabel?" the scientist asked displaying a surprisingly warm, even fatherly nature while sitting on the couch across. "I've heard what you said from inside when you found my lab. Is something the matter?"
With a deep sigh, Dipper began his story. "It all started late last summer a few days before our birthday on August 31st. After I saved Ford from an abandoned alien spaceship, he offered to make me his apprentice when the summer was over, but that meant leaving Mabel behind. It was absolutely suffocating to see her so sad like that. But then everything changed with that giant X in the sky that marked the beginning of Weirdmageddon."
"So it's like when that event began while we were in Gravity Falls rescuing Ms. Northwest." Stein commented. "I suppose judging by how panicked you were, Mabel didn't truly reveal what happened until today?"
"Yep. Turns out that when Ford returned to our universe through a portal he built that Stan used, the creation of a dimensional rift came with." Dipper continued. "He made me promise that I would not talk to anyone else about it except for him, not even Mabel. But now that proved to be our undoing and here we are."
"I see." Franken stated turning his screw. "You know Dipper, you kind of remind me of myself when I was a boy. Clever, determined, hungry for answers. But unlike you, I was a bit unstable in my search which often lead me to maim my fellow students. And yes, that is indeed where those hands came from."
"They were from that George guy, right?" Dipper asked. "Indeed, but thankfully he's still alive and with a pair of prosthetics that I helped build." Stein answered. "Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that while our mistakes can define us from time to time, they can also help us grow as human beings. I should know because like your family, I've made a few rash decisions involving yellow-colored manipulators myself."
"You're talking about Medusa, right?" Dipper continued. "Indeed. She actually beckoned me to side with her using my weakness of madness." Stein explained. "Thankfully I was able to come back thanks to Maka and Marie, but hearing what happened between you and Mabel just can't stop reminding me of that time."
"You know, you actually aren't as nuts as you claim to be." the boy remarked rising from his spot on the couch. "Maybe you've got a few screws loose, no pun intended, but when it all comes down to it, you're a surprisingly understanding guy."
"Thank you Dipper, and good to see a fellow genius sit down with me for once without fearing for his life." Frank replied tousling his hair. "Hey speaking of which, where did that big screw on your head come from? And how did you get all those stitches too?" Dipper wondered to which Stein replied with a sinister snicker. "Now that's a funny story."
Meanwhile with Death the Kid, he was set on asking his father about the connection the two of them shared with Asura. Marching toward the Death Room, he opened the door and went through the guillotine lined path to find Lord Death standing in front of his mirror with Eibon of all people next to him, even though they told the Sorcerer yesterday to stay down in the Secret Vault.
"Do you think he's learned about you-know-what yet?" Eibon asked his old friend. "I am not sure Eibon, but I dread the lad's reaction to it once he finds us." Death responded. "It's like you said, why must there be so many secrets?"
Suddenly Eibon noticed Death's son right in front of the two with his arms crossed. "Uh, my friend?" he stated. "What is it now Eibon?" the Shinigami asked before he realized who had walked in on them. "He's right in front of us, isn't he?"
"Indeed I am father." Kid answered coldly. "Is it true Asura is my brother?" he asked. "And if so, why did you keep this from me for ages?"
"So it's come to this." Death muttered defeatedly. "Indeed, Asura is your brother, created from a bit of myself just like you. But since he turned into such a reprehensible being, I couldn't bear to let you know that you were related to an embodiment of evil."
"And just as importantly, how did you leave the Vault when we specifically told you to stay down there Eibon?" Kid said turning to the aforementioned Sorcerer. "I simply couldn't stay down there any longer. I had to learn what had happened while I was away plus it was awfully dusty in there." Eibon explained. "I am terribly sorry for disobeying you."
"And I'm sorry for keeping secrets from you for eight hundred years. I do hope you can forgive us, especially me." Death stated miserably just as he felt his son hug him. "I'm sorry for not knowing any better father. Though I will accept this family secret more maturely than someone else I know."
"Thank you Kid for understanding." Death responded hugging the younger Death God back. "Wait, who is that someone else who isn't being mature?" he asked. "It's about the Pines twins."
Speaking of the Pines, Ford was rushing through the Academy halls in search of Mabel, thoughts about how the argument between her and Dipper was basically his fault for swearing Dipper to keep the rift a secret from everyone.
"I was an utter fool to make Dipper promise me! No, I was a fool to even build the portal in the first place!" the polydactyl muttered to himself suddenly skidding to a stop. "Whoa mama! I mean, excuse me miss but could you please tell me where my great-niece is?" he asked a short blonde woman with rather bizarre facial features. "She's about yay-high, mouth full of braces, colorful sweater, tears in her eyes after she was deemed worse than our family's arch-enemy by her own brother?"
"I think I may have seen someone like that." Auntie answered. "She probably went thataway." she revealed pointing to her right. "Thank you so much madame!" Ford exclaimed rushing to that direction, desperate to comfort the younger girl but was too blind to realize he had ran into a familiar woman and their glasses landed on the floor. "Can you watch where you're going miss?!"
"Why don't you watch where you're going? Now where are my glasses?!" the woman exclaimed grabbing Ford's glasses while he grabbed the woman's, and when he put them on he found Azusa right in front of him wearing his glasses. "Well this is awkward." Azusa commented. "Now can I have my glasses back?"
"Terribly sorry, as much I'd hate to say it." Ford apologized taking back his eyewear. "So, what were you up to?" he glowered at the East Asian Death Scythe. "That should be none of your business. How about you?" Yumi asked just as miffed. "I'm simply looking for Mabel. Have you seen her come by lately?" the author inquired. "I did. She was awfully miserable over something relating to her brother so Joe and I led her to the overnight rooms."
"Good, now where are those rooms?" Ford continued, his nervousness alleviating before Azusa made the big reveal. "You wouldn't miss them, they look like a dungeon."
"A WHAT?!" the author shouted as his concern turned to anger at the Death Scythe.
"So you're telling me these so-called overnight rooms is a goddamn dungeon?!" Ford ranted loudly while being led through the DWMA's underground by Azusa and Joe Buttakaki. "Chill out Mr. Pines, you're getting it wrong!" Joe tried to calm his nerves. "The dungeon is further down with a few torture rooms. Thankfully we barely use those."
"Thank you for your kindness Joe, but that doesn't change the fact that Mabel is so depressed, she locked herself in a flipping prison!" Ford shouted as they reached one of the overnight rooms where they could hear Mabel quietly sobbing while curled up into a ball. "M-Mabel, may I come in?"
Mabel replied with a faint groan before Ford stepped in. "Listen sweetheart, I know you may think you're to blame for what happened last summer, but I'd say the same to myself as well. If it were me instead, I would be just as gullible as you were." he calmly said stroking her hair. "Just please show me your smile again so that I can help you and Dipper make amends."
"Aw, isn't that sweet?" Mabel finally spoke up in a shockingly more callous tone. "You're actually caring for your family! But then again, old Pine Tree is beyond saving anyway."
"That isn't the Mabel I know! It can only be-" Ford exclaimed before Mabel rose up and turned around, revealing sharp teeth and the faintest third eye on her forehead. "Long time no see Stanford. It's me, Anti-Mabel!" Anti-Mabel cheerfully greeted him. "Did you really think I was gone forever?"
"How did you come back, and how are you possessing your good self?!" the six-fingered man asked terrified. "You can thank Kishin Cipher for that wrinkles! When he found me drifting through the mindscape plotting my revenge after I was defeated by you and my alternate selves, he made me more powerful than ever! Once I get rid of all of you, I can steal that Kishin soul for him and be paid handsomely!"
"I won't let you Anti-Mabel!" the old man shouted whipping out a laser pistol. "And what Kishin soul are you talking about?" he asked. "Lord Death actually keeps one amongst the crosses in his-" Joe began before Azusa shut him up. "Can you not Joe?"
"Oh come now Sixer, you wouldn't hurt your own family would you?" the evil Mabel said trying to get Ford to surrender. "My foolish other me has already suffered enough from her brother, but now another member of her family decides to ruin her life! It's times like these where Stanley of all people seems like the only Pines that could qualify as a good person."
"Azusa, Joe, get everyone possible and meet me in the Death Room." Ford lividly muttered, his hands twitching before dropping his firearm and reeled his arm back while the two ran away. "Oh look at that, I was right." were the last words Anti-Mabel said before Ford's fist gave her an overtly friendly greeting.
With the ting of a wineglass, the meeting in the Death Room began. "Thank you all for coming on such short notice." Ford announced to an audience of the remaining Mystery Meisters, Marie, Azusa, Joe, Eibon, among others while Lord Death stood next to him. "Today the reason I've gathered everyone here is because we have a new crisis on our hands."
He picked up the unconscious body of his great-niece and held it high, revealing the bruise mark on her face. "Mabel here has come under the control of an evil version of herself from another dimension that has allied with Kishin Cipher. Although I have put her to sleep, as much as I hated to, she stated her motives of entering the Death Room to retrieve the soul of Asura."
"Are you sure about that?" Dipper snarked standing next to Stein. "I bet she's only faking it to earn our sympathy." He was then ordered to shush by the Meister. "Anyway, although it may seem there's no way to rescue her, we actually do know of a method to do so." Ford continued. "We must go inside her mind itself and stop the source before it can get any worse."
"Question!" an innocent-looking young girl with mahogany brown hair chimed in with a raise of her hand. "Yes young lady?" Ford said preparing for any questions. "Are we like going to dissect her or something?" the girl asked, much to everyone's confusion. "No we aren't! I think." another girl with deep blue eyes and long blonde hair featuring a headband answered. "What are we going to do sir?"
"Pardon me for being rude, but how does going inside her mind equal dissection?!" Ford exclaimed irritatedly. "Sorry mister, don't mind Meme! She's just a bit out there." yet another girl with indigo eyes apologized for her. Stanford just turned to Death and asked "Let me guess, are they not in the EAT class?"
"Yessir, NOT class." Death answered. "Okay, would anyone like to take the floor for me?" Ford offered to his audience, and they answered by turning to Dipper. The boy just sighed and stepped to his great-uncle's side. "What we need to do is recite a certain incantation that will allow us entry into Mabel's mindscape. But since Bill is already inside it, there's no doubt he's waiting for us. So we need to suit up."
"We can use Mabel's drawings!" Patty exclaimed. "They are meant to be combat uniforms after all." she suggested and everyone agreed.
"Come to think of it, this reminds me of a plan Sid's been thinking of before he left called the Spartoi." Stein revealed. "A group of some of Death Weapon Meister Academy's most gifted students, among others. No offense to Mr. Hero or the girls of the NOT class."
"None taken." the aforementioned students responded. "But if we want to stop Kishin Cipher once and for all, all of the Pines must play an important role." Stein continued. "Now then, time to suit up."
Another montage of clothes-making later, the rest of the Mystery Meisters now had their own combat outfits.
Ford wore a light-colored buttonless shirt, simple khakis, a belt buckle with a cat symbol on it and a white coat bearing a six-fingered hand on the back.
Soos was now clad in tan overalls with a question mark on the front pocket, a black undershirt and wore his cap backwards.
Pacifica retained her black leggings & cream boots, but in place of her usual attire was a purple dress with a pink button-up frilled shirt that had llama fur cuffs and went down to a white sash.
Gideon had on a baby blue martial arts uniform and a dark blue undershirt with his pentagram symbol stitched onto the left sleeve.
And finally, McGucket wore a white-lined brown & black suit and a pair of green-tinted goggles.
The EAT students, except Hero, all had similarly colored uniforms of blue and white while the NOT girls had their regular clothing on.
"This is it everyone, our last foe before returning home." Soos declared lighting nine candles. "One question, how do we get into Mabel's head? I mean, we can't put our hands on her head at the same time, then there wouldn't be enough room!"
"I got an idea. Why don't one group go in first and then everyone else comes in as reinforcements?" Pacifica suggested. "Good idea there Pacifica." Maka agreed. "Now let's go over who will go first. Dipper, Pacifica, Mr. Pines, Kid, Black Star, Soos, Wendy and Crona will be the first team. Kilik, Ox, Kim and Hero are the second. And finally Gideon, Blair, Stein, Mr. McGucket and the NOT class are the third one."
"Nice idea Bishop 2." Soos complimented to the Scythe Meister's surprise. "Uh, what did you just call me?" Maka asked. "It's your codename dude. We all gotta have cool codenames if we're going on this risky mission. For example, our team is themed after chess, Ox's has a playing card theme and Gideon's is for Arcana."
"I'm not sure if I was told about this earlier, but carry on." Ox commented bluntly. "Well, see you all later." he added as Ford began the ritual. "Now, are we all mentally prepared for this?" he challenged to his teammates. "Make sure you have weapons by your side."
With a resigned sigh, Maka chose her father to be her temporary weapon until Soul was saved. Likewise, Ford and Azusa shared a tense glare before she became his temporary weapon. "Now that everyone's prepared, well; hope our sanities are intact before we fight Bill." He pressed his hand on Mabel's forehead and the others followed before the scientist began chanting. "Videntis omnium. Magister mentium. Magnesium ad hominem. Magnum opus."
Ford continued chanting which caused everyone's eyes to glow a bright blue. "Habeus corpus! Inceptus Nolanus overratus! Magister mentium magister mentium magister mentium!" In a bright azure flash, the group fell asleep, meaning they have finally entered Mabel's mind.
Dipper slowly opened his eyes and found himself in a familiar place. This was none other than Mabel's accursed dream world of Mabeland. "Oh God, not this place again." he moaned before the others got up. "What the hell is this weirdo place? Are we sure this is Mabel's head?" Black Star wondered brushing the back of his head. "Maybe we should ask that black and white person over there."
The team tiptoed towards a monochrome version of Mabel wearing a suit patterned sweater. "There is another dimension, beyond that which is known to man." the Mabel explained. "A dimension not only of sight and sound; but of mind as well. Your next stop, a land of both shadow & substance, of things and ideas. I will be your guide as you cross into: Neo Mabeland."
The monochrome Mabel pulled back a curtain to reveal the Mabeland that Dipper, Wendy and Soos knew, but it was more devastated & gloomy reflecting Mabel's current mindset and Anti-Mabel's dominance over her. "To your left is what was once dubbed Bubblegum Alley, formerly a place of childlike wonder similar to the rest of Mabeland." she narrated. "Now it is a shell of its former self, following a mental coup d'etat performed by an evil Mabel under orders from a certain someone."
"Okay, can someone explain what Mabel's doing here when she should be held captive?" Liz commented. "I am not the Mabel you should recognize, but rather a Mabel formed from her own subconscious that shall serve as your guide through this world. You may call me Twilight Mabel."
"Isn't that kind of like in that old show?" Crona asked. "Indeed it is Crona. Now then, follow me." Twilight Mabel replied leading the others on their path. "This place was once a paradise of color and fun, that is until a certain someone took things too far when secrets were revealed."
"Can you blame me? Mabel full-on intentionally caused the end of the-" Dipper shouted before Pacifica smacked him in the face. "Okay, that's got to stop Dipper!" she interrupted him. "I know you're super pissed about what she did, but who cares?! If you or Ford were in her shoes, chances are the exact same thing would happen!"
"But she had no idea what it was yet handed it over anyway!" Dipper defended himself. "Well, that's pretty much my fault." Ford confessed. "If only I weren't so secretive and untrusting of others back then."
"Yes indeed, the power of trust can be a double-edged sword." Twilight Mabel interrupted. "On one hand it feels good to be trusted, but on the other-"
"SHUT YOUR DAMN NARRATING ALREADY!" Black Star screamed smacking Twilight Mabel on the back of her head. "I am only trying to assist you my friends, and give some important life lessons in a very mentally scarring fashion." she calmly stated. "This Mabel's right, what matters now is finding our Mabel." Spirit stated. "So where to?"
"I believe your first step should be following me." Twilight Mabel replied. "Step right this way toward the ice cream beach." she announced walking towards a seemingly normal beach where a group of cartoonish dogs stood with their backs turned to the group and arms spread out over a sea of orange juice.
The heroes just stared silently in wonder at their current surroundings, contemplating how a little girl's broken heart would affect her this much. Then suddenly they heard a loud moan. "What was that?!" Pacifica shouted pulling out a basic spear. The troop frantically looked around the shore fearing that enemies might be coming. Luckily, none were coming from behind them, but rather rising from the orange water.
"Are those supposed to be from Mabel's imagination?" Tsubaki wondered gazing upon the monsters that took the shape of cuddly animals and many odd beings, led by the being Dipper had dreaded the most ever since he first stepped foot. "Yo, what up brahs! It's me, the new and improved Dippy Fresh!"
"W-what even is that?!" Kid exclaimed resisting the urge to laugh. "I'm Dipper's superior and more supportive counterpart assigned by my master to protect her at all costs." Dippy Fresh stated summoning an exact replica of Excalibur. "FOOL! My power can be imitated, but never completely duplicated!" the real Excalibur cried out in defiance. "Come at us with everything you've got imposter!"
"Sure thing old guy!" Dippy Fresh declared summoning more monsters crafted from Mabel's mind to his aid. "You just had to open that big nonexistent mouth of yours, didn't you?" Dipper groaned sighing. "I think we might need reinforcements!"
"You mean contacting Death? Which one of us brought a mirror?" Black Star wondered before the rest of the team shrugged. "Dammit, we're gonna need a good reflective surface to use!" he muttered. "Or we could use my Shinigami powers," Kid suggested. "but I'm quite preoccupied right now!"
"I think I know how." Dipper said glaring at his radical counterpart who was already waiting for a battle. "Come on lamebrain, I'm waiting!" he called out casually spinning his sword around. His smug attitude was soon immediately broken when Dipper came charging and their blades clashed. "Tell me where my sister is, or else!"
"Fat chance dude! Why would she ever want to see you again after all you've done?!" Dippy chided backflipping away and firing a black beam from his blade. Dipper on the other hand sliced it in two and sent its halves flying towards the nearest beasts. "I may have screwed up on that part, but I can learn! And she can learn too!"
"Learning's for chumps anyway!" Dippy Fresh shouted with a smug grin continuing to seemingly gain the upper hand. "Why can't more people wear their hats backwards, say outdated catchphrases and disrespect authority like me?"
"You know what, you're right." Dipper agreed with his mirror self. "WHY CAN'T MORE PEOPLE LIKE YOU HAVE THEIR HEADS BACKWARDS?!" With a single stab through his mouth, Dippy Fresh's overconfidence became as broken as his neck as Dipper skewered his sword through and twisted his head in a perfect rotation, ending him once and for all. "Must've been dark times, those 90s."
Dipper picked up his fallen dream version's visor and let out a puff of air on it, fogging up the lenses and allowing him to contact Death. "42-42-564, use this to knock on Death's door." he chanted causing Lord Death to appear on the lenses. "Hey Lord Death."
"Howdy and hello my boy!" the Shinigami cheerfully greeted. "Whoa, what happened here? Did you manage to locate Mabel yet?" he asked. "No, we're currently outnumbered by a bunch of monsters that have been summoned, and we need help! Send in everyone!"
"Which ones?" Death responded. "EVERYONE!" the boy screamed out startling the headmaster of the Academy. "Okey dokie then, the rest will be here in a jiffy!" The message cut off just as a shadowy tendril emerging from Dippy Fresh's arm snatched the visor from Dipper's hands and smashed it. "Uh uh uh lamer!"
Dippy Fresh let out a ghastly laugh while his eyes turned blood red, his skin white as bone and his radical attire being replaced with rags. "Not cool how you broke my neck there dude!" he shouted in a menacing deeper voice. "Now let's see how YOU made me feel!"
"You leave him alone!" Ox cried out dropping from above to impale Dippy Fresh with his spear. Kilik & the Pots, Kim & Jackie, Hero & Mai, Gideon, Blair, McGucket, Stein & Marie and the NOT girls soon followed. "Knew you would all come through!" Dipper cheered. "Anything for you kid!" McGucket exclaimed. "So what's all this?"
"We're going to need someone to cover for us while we find Mabel! Are you all willing to help?" Ford explained. "Will do Mr. Pines!" Tsugumi said as she and her three Meisters Meme, Anya & Ao saluted. "Good! I got a new plan!" Dipper announced. "Queen, Bishops 1 & 2, Rook, Knight, Pawns 1, 2 & 3, Jack, Deuce, Ace, Chariot, Empress, Hermit & Hierophant are all coming with me! That tower over there is where I found Mabel last time, so she must be there!"
"I knew those codenames would become a thing!" Soos cheered before their group raced toward a sandcastle while Dippy Fresh reemerged. "No no no, they can't reach the real Mabel!" he shouted angrily. "Xyler, Craz, after them!"
A pair of knights in rusted black armor nodded to their master before giving pursuit, preparing their weapons to kill. The heroes continued racing toward their destination when the knights attacked. "None shall pass bro!" the first knight declared and the second added "Stand down or face our awesome wrath!"
"You really aren't making yourselves look threatening when you're speaking like surfer dudes." Stein remarked smashing their helmets to pieces with Marie's hammer form, revealing a duo of brightly-colored radical young men underneath, one with blue hair while the other was a blonde with a tan. "Xyler and Craz?" Dipper exclaimed. "Don't tell me Kishin Cipher has you under his control too!"
"Kinda brah, we were just LARPing when that evil Mabel jazzed on in and took over." Xyler explained. "But now that you guys are here, we can help you save Mabel!" Craz added. "Actually, this is our mission alone." Wendy politely refused. "But you guys can help out by taking out the monsters chasing after us!"
"Sounds good to us dude!" the dream boy duo shouted picking up a skateboard and a keytar to fight with while the group continued onward. When they finally reached the top of the tower, Mabel stood with her back turned. "Mabel, it's us. We're here to rescue you." Dipper assured putting a hand on his sister's shoulder. "I'm sorry for everything. Think you could forgive me?"
"LOL, forgiveness is for dorks! Everyone loves me because they think I'm silly!" Mabel exclaimed squishing her cheeks. "That's not Mabel!" Ford shouted pointing Azusa at the girl. "Yeah, she can be kinda silly, but I'm pretty sure she would never say forgiveness is for dorks." Pacifica added.
"Naw bros, this is totally what Mabel is like!" Dippy Fresh declared suddenly behind them while performing a goofy dance. "You just have to accept it and-"
"I would let you finish, but YOU SHOULD BE DEAD!" Dipper finally snapped performing a mighty slash that interrupted his 90s self's free-to-play game-esque jig and sent him falling to the ground below. "Now as for you."
"Oops, looks like my cover's been blown!" Anti-Mabel chirped dropping the act and revealing the real Mabel inside a cage. "You think you're so much smarter, but you'll never be as mature as I am!"
"So is your definition of mature being a really annoying sadist?" Maka snarked preparing Spirit for a battle. "Yeah, kinda." Anti-Mabel hissed before she summoned a large stuffed cat dressed as a judge behind her. "Behold my partner Judge Kitty Kitty Meow Meow Face-Shwartztein! And of course, he shall judge you!"
"Yer all guilty!" the cat shouted pounding his tiny gavel and made them lose their footing. "Court is now in session! And the crime: disrespecting our new lord & master and your own sister as well!"
"STOP SAYING THAT!" Dipper screamed stabbing Anti-Mabel with Excalibur. "Can we just put this blaming to rest and let us have Mabel already?!" The boy was on the verge of tears, both from irritation over the inhabitants of Neo-Mabeland and regret from yelling at her earlier. "I promise, the two of us can be siblings and never fight again! We can patch things up, I'm sure of it! Just please, please...give me back my sister."
There was dead silence in the area before Anti-Mabel let out a hoarse, high-pitched, hateful laugh and wiped a tear from her eye. "Gotta say Pine Tree, you are pretty stupid when emotional!" she sighed. "Maybe a little knock on the head will fix things." The feline judge over her readied his gavel for the final blow. Dipper closed his eyes in acceptance of his fate as the hammer just about reached his face.
Until Twilight Mabel, Maka and Spirit blocked it. The weapons struggled against each other as the regretful brother opened his eyes in shock. "Go, save Mabel! We'll take it from here!" Maka urged him. "But what about you guys?!" Dipper asked. "It's okay. She's family, and families always protect each other." Twilight Mabel assured with a grin.
"How could you Twilight Mabel?! I thought Mabels had to stick together!" Anti-Mabel shouted in disbelief. "I think the proper term would be 'Family sticks together.' Don't you have one of your own in your world?" Twilight Mabel coldly inquired. "Of course I did! They were all a bunch of fools anyway." the other Mabel answered. "An incorrigible flirt, a charity obsessed hippie, a wannabe video star & part-time DJ and the first pig to ever be arrested for armed robbery! They were all just as anti-lovable as I am, and I will make sure that I prove love is nothing but for losers!"
"Are you truly sure about that?" Spirit stated. "I'm definitely a pervert who lost his wife because of it, not gonna lie, but I know that deep down my sweet baby girl still loves me! Even with our differences, there's no doubt that I will stick by Maka every step of the way no matter what!"
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Anti-Mabel retaliated with a negative-colored rainbow that swept Maka & Twilight Mabel off their feet. What she didn't account for was Dipper trying to unlock the cage his real sister was trapped in. "Uh, anyone got a lock pick?"
"I think Ragnarok can help." Crona stated confidently while his Black Blood partner sprouted from out his vest. "This'll be easy-peesy!" Ragnarok declared musing over the cage door before he decided to up and rip the door off, tossing Mabel out with it.
The girl slowly got up before her brother quickly embraced her while bursting into tears. "I am so sorry Mabel! I'm sorry I got so mad, that I said you were no better than Bill, and that I basically got you into this mess! Please just forgive me already! It's okay if you don't, because I'm really stu-"
Mabel shushed him with her trademark tin grin. "Oh quit it bro. You were pretty stupid, but I was too." she whispered hugging him tight. "We can be stupid together."
"Thank you Mabel, I really needed that." Dipper stated as they broke and wiped off his tears. "Awkward sibling hug?" he offered spreading out his arms. "Stupid sibling hug." the sweater girl replied and they finally embraced after so long, with a casual "Pat pat." added in as well.
"Kids!" Ford cried rushing up to hug them. "I am so glad you decided to be stupid together! Now we can-" He was interrupted by Anti-Mabel striking him in the back. He dropped the kids and was brought to his knees, writhing in agony. "We can't...let you win."
"Stanford!" Azusa shouted using her wavelength to guard her current Meister. "Azusa, you saved me." the polydactyl gasped in wonder. "We may have our differences, but one thing's for certain." Yumi declared. "The kids can never be harmed on our watch."
The two, alongside Stein dual-wielding Marie & Spirit, charged at Anti-Mabel ready to defend the children even if it costed them their lives. "If you think teamwork can help you, then so be it!" the anti-lovable Mabel challenged before Shwartzstein merged with her, forming a feral pink cat creature with another eye atop its forehead.
The only sounds coming out of Anti-Mabel's mouth now were loud roars while bearing its grappling hook claws. It lunged at the adults ready to maul them before the Pines twins came to their defense, both wielding Excalibur. "Leave our friends alone!"
"So it's just down to the Pines family now?" the empowered Anti-Mabel snarled. "I can accept that. Just need the rest of the pieces off the board!" With a single swipe of her hand, the rest of the Mystery Meisters were blasted out of the tower, destroying the walls and leaving only Dipper, Mabel & Ford behind. "Come and face me you three! Or are you just going to stay there frightened?"
"You can't scare us any longer!" Ford growled readying his fists in lieu of Azusa before his great-nephew & niece stopped him. "Rest Grunkle Ford, and bring back the others." Dipper commanded him. "We'll take Anti-Mabel from here." Mabel added. "And mark my words, we'll finish this and go home."
Ford simply nodded and raced downstairs while the twins readied themselves. "Oh just cut it! We all know they'll just die anyway no matter what you'll do, and you won't even care!" Anti-Mabel snapped. The twins however gave no response while holding Excalibur together. "Can't say we blame you Anti-Mabel."
The evil Mabel raised a brow in both confusion and fear. "We can be stupid, we can be silly, heck! We can be selfish too!" the prime Mabel declared. "But we're still kids. Well, only post-preteens but you get our point."
"There's still time for us to grow, to change." Dipper added. "And there's still time for us to stop you, save the universe and our loved ones. People can make really big mistakes, but we can't let them define us for the rest of our lives."
"They can help us develop our lives." Mabel concluded while they glimmered with Excalibur's energy. "In other words, it's finally time for us to grow up."
With a mad dash towards Anti-Mabel, the twins shined brighter than they could ever imagine and they finally stabbed her in the chest.
"FAAAAAAMILY FIIIIINISHEEEEERRRRR!"
Anti-Mabel's jaw dropped in complete and utter fear as the Holy Sword's blade slowly dragged itself upwards toward her head. She barely had enough time to scream out loud when it sliced her in half and the resulting explosion consumed her. "NO! NOOOOOO!"
"We...we did it." Dipper gasped for breath. "Yeah. Guess we did." Mabel added before they fell to the ground. Luckily for them, there was no one else except for all their friends when they finally landed. "KIDS!" Ford cried out picking them up off the sand. "Are you two all right? Exhale once if yes!"
"Don't be such a worrywart Ford, we're fine." Mabel stated reassuringly. "Yeah, we stopped Anti-Mabel, saved Mabel and our family bond is stronger than ever." Dipper added. "Indeed it was children." Excalibur commented. "But this can be seen as only the final exam! With her out of the way, our next target should be none other than Kishin Cipher!"
"Excalibur is right. And I shall be behind you every step of the way." Twilight Mabel responded as Mabeland began to fade away. "Well, guess this is goodbye." Dipper bade farewell to their guide Mabel. "Thank you for helping us find my sister."
"You are very welcome my alternative brother." Twilight Mabel smiled before she began to fade to white as well. "We all shall meet again someday, in the magical world of Mabeland."
Mabel moaned as she opened her eyes and before her was a bright blue sky. "What happened? Where am I?" she groaned rubbing her head and turned around to see her friends' smiling faces. "Everyone."
"You're safe here Mabel. With us." Dipper declared hugging his twin one last time. "And you know who won't be safe?"
"Right." Mabel replied gazing at Lord Death's mirror. "Kishin Cipher."
"Bon voyage children. And when you find Stanley, tell him I said hello!" Death said turning his mirror into a portal. "But what about you?" Ford asked. "You probably can't come with us, so how can it be possible?"
"Oh I have my ways Stanford." Death stated. "Now off you go everyone! Go and save the world!" The Mystery Meisters, plus their six new allies, climbed into the mirror portal that would lead them to Gravity Falls, leaving Dipper and Mabel as the only ones left.
"Ready to head into the unknown?"
"Nope. But let's do it."
With that, the twins disappeared into the portal leaving only Death, Eibon and Joe behind in the Death Room. "Joe, Eibon!"
"Yes Lord Death?" the two responded willing to follow any command he gave them.
"Let's roll up our sleeves and get to work!"
IT! IS! FINISHED! After so long, Chapter 12 is finally completed! And I'm just so happy to finally get this over with since I have been writing it since November. Hopefully it was all worth it my loyal fans and I hope to see you next time on the penultimate chapter of Gravity Soul! But first, a little word from Twilight Mabel.
"It's amazing how far our heroes have come." Twilight Mabel commented. "What started as teaming up against an Eyebat to saving the universe from the combined forces of their greatest foes. It makes me so proud of our characters for developing so much, our author for staying so dedicated to his tales and you, the audience for staying by all the-"
Suddenly a pair of bandages wrapped around Twilight Mabel's mouth as Kishin Cipher came into view. "So Pine Tree, Shooting Star and their little pilgrimage are coming back huh? Adorable!" he grinned strangling the narrating Mabel to death before he glared at the readers. "Be sure to come back next time for my grand return to the story! And remember, I'M ALWAYS WATCHING YOU!"
TO BE CONTINUED...
3 notes · View notes
helloiliketits · 6 years
Text
There is only one Spiderman (Peter Parker x Reader)
Summary: Reader is just a normal kid. Like you and me. Friends with the one and only Pooter Porker Peter Parker and just really feisty and find it difficult to bolt away from danger. Which almost gives our little lovestruck Spider a heart attack more often than not.
(This has been in my drafts since last year so its outdated, also english is not my native language)
Reader: Of any color
Warnings: Just me kissing ass because I love you, some fluff, some angst but not too much because I dont play like that, also there are some vine references, and the words “b*tch”
Tumblr media
(I listened to Tchaikovsky while writing this and honestly each piece syncs so well with this gif, bless the creator)
Sure, he may be a web slinging superhero on the side, but Peter Parker was still a little nerd and had crushes on cute people like everybody else.
Specially someone as cute as you. No one could resist you. Not even our cliche school bitch bully, Flash Thompson. You were a bit of an introvert and would rather spend your time reading fanfics on Tumblr and having some fun times with a few friends but you did have some sudden bursts of confidence here and there. 
It all started when you were new to the Midtown High School. Being a new student already gets you ton of attention. Pair that with your incredible personality and you might have just swallowed a magnet because of how much people are attracted to you. Whether you like it or not. You were practically the Ruby Rose of Midtown High. Everyone liked you instantly. Boys, girls, plants, even a god damn piece of paper would NOT politely detach itself from your shoe during Science class and you’re pretty sure you heard a girl in the room say “Me asf” while you tried to yank it off as the class just basked in your pure presence. You had people feeling ~some type of way~ okay?
So it comes as no surprise that Flash Thompson was equally attracted to you and wanted to date you even if it’s just for the rights to brag because *rolls eye* Flash. You on the other hand, had heard enough about his shenanigans through some of your friends and thought it was best to avoid him.
But isn’t fate a comical thing? You’re on your way to your next class and there he is, shoving our precious cinnamon roll, Peter into a locker while Ned watches anxiously. Sad to see his friend stuffed into a locker while also not wanting to go through the same thing. Peter just sighs and does nothing while Flash and his minions are tucking his legs into the tiny space of the locker which probably doesn’t even belong to Peter, judging from another kid standing next to the group of jocks, obviously not there to witness a "cool" fight but also not friends with Peter enough to care about his state right now. "Guys can't you stuff him in somebody else's locker?" the guy huffs, but generally does nothing to stop them. You guess it's because he doesn't want to get hip checked into the small space with Peter as if they're playing "seven minutes in heaven" (but it lasts as long as it takes for someone to finally rescue their asses). So, you decide to step in. "Flash!" you holler. That definitely gets his attention and he turns around quickly, running his palms through his hair to "style" it and leans against the now closed locker door, grinning. As if there isn’t a very antsy Peter Parker just inside, praying to whoever was listening, that he make it to AP Physics in time.
“Y/N!” he grins, opening his arms for a hug. “Cut the shit, Thompson of a bitch. Let that kid out,” you test. There’s a mix of “ooh”s and “aah”s from the students in the hallway as Flash’s smile falters for a brief second, obviously not used to being talked to like that, but he just crosses his arms over his chest, raising an eyebrow.
“Why don’t you run back to snow white, dwarf-o,” one of his friend teases but before you can get the “I am the perfect height to punch you in the nuts, and I will,” Flash collects his ‘bros’ with a “woah-woah, guys” and bangs on the locker twice and leaves with his group. But not before giving you a wink (which you scoff at).
The hustle and bustle of the hallway continues as the onlookers suddenly get hit with the reminder that they need to be in class. You do too. So, you rush to the locker and throw it open, to let a very confused Peter Parker out. You see that the inside of the locker is... well, hygienically challenged but that’s a teenage boy’s with god knows how many dirty socks and raunchy magazines buried inside so you avert your focus to his scrunched eyebrows and his mouth hanging open instead.
Don’t get him wrong, he’s very grateful but also slightly mad at you for being cute and nice! How dare you be so attractive!? God damn it, Y/N! Now his attraction has increased tenfold! He mutters a faint “Thanks”, flustered beyond his wits and you give him a kind smile that has his heart beating all the way up to his head. He’s damn near frozen.
Tumblr media
.And now that’s the origin story of you two. Of course, Peter couldn’t keep his eyes and distance away from you and would “observe” you whenever you were in the room. 
Which was almost always. 
Because he followed you there. 
Which Ned states as “stalking” but Peter describes it as “checking her out up on her”.  [Yeah, ok, Pete!1!1!] 
Much to Peter’s delight, you guys practically lived in the same building so Peter had twelve hundred (and more) excuses to walk you home. Ofcourse, Spider duties remained but that was more of an after-school activity. And it’s not like the neighborhood was jam packed with crime 24x7. Sometimes his “job” required simply patrolling and the most action he saw was a woman dump a milkshake on her (no longer) boyfriend’s head.
One slightly unfortunate day, as you and Peter were trudging up the streets, complaining about school, a VERY clear, sharp scream of a woman echoed nearby! Now THAT’S a job for Spiderman! But, like, you were RIGHT there! So it’s not like he could rain drop, drop top, roll and whip out his spider suit in the middle of the street, kiss you on the cheek and zoom zoom away,
You both exchanged a brief, wide eyed gaze of absolute shock as you both ran in separate direction, wasting no time. By the time Spiderman had arrived to the scene, there was no woman but there was a homeless guy holding a knife towards none other than our lovely protagonist! (das you, bruh) 
“Go for it, shit! I’m a bad bitch, you can’t kill me!” You shout, as Spiderman skrrt skrrts his web and webs the bad guy to the wall before he can touch your spaghett, landing on his feet infront of you with HALF a mind to grab you by the shoulders and shake you like a drink being made by a barista, the other half of him wanted to reach out and absolutely fecken high five you! “Er, good job. Go home, it isn’t safe here” is all he can choke out in his fake “I came from the mid-west, howdy, I’m the man!” accent before catapulting himself off the alleyway [its always alleyways, God, they’re the hub for all bad shit! So predictable too! Take your mugging somewhere unexpected, man! Throw the heroes off guard! Do you even business, bro?]
Back in your apartment building, as you turn the corner practically skipping, a pair of surprisingly strong hands suddenly grab you and pull you so hard, that all your hair holds a Met Gala at the front of your face, curtaining your view from the one and only Peter Dorker, “Are you crazy! Why’d you do that!?” he yells at you
Tumblr media
Completely not giving a feck about not giving out spoilers (*cough* tom *cough*) Why’d you do WHAT!? He wasn’t even there! What’s he talking about!
But right now all you’re focused on is the fact that this random ass bish is grabbing your shoulders like some fecken tentacle and- “You ran away! Someone had to do something!”
He barks, “WOMAN I WAS TRYIN  That’s Spiderman’s job! When you hear trouble, you turn and you run the other way! There’s people who will handle this kind of-”
But before he can get another lecture in, “I helped a lady today! There’s only ONE spiderman, Peter! And he can’t be there for us all the time! It’s NOT his duty- He is NOT obligated to cleanse the streets of Queens! Our work is NOT to turn the other way and hope somebody else does the dirty work! He’s here to HELP and we need to PARTICIPATE! We need to do OUR part WHEN we CAN!” you shout, face all red and sweaty, huffing out, trying not to crack into a smile, proud at yourSELF because damn, that speech was GOOD. You huff, contemplating if you should let him EAT it or just go to your room and head bang over the fact that you got noticed by Spiderman! 
Taking one last look at a very open mouthed Peter, you walk around him and into your apartment as he just stands there, frozen like a chicken pizza at Walgreens. 
He lets out a long, loud breath! How could you be so STUBBORN! This was for YOUR safety! Unless you’re on top of Nick Fury’s “to recruit into Avengers” list, you don’t just go bursting into alleyways in the name of saving people! That’s DANGEROUS! He can’t lose you to some heroic-shit-gone-wrong!
But Peter also felt RELIEVED! For the first time in YEARS, he felt content! You were right! There is only one Spiderman! And no he can’t be there to fight crime every second of the day! And while that ate Peter alive every waking moment of his life, he was also glad that there were good natured people like you in this world! Ones who stood up for somebody and didn’t wait for somebody else! He felt a lot better, realizing that he didn’t have to do this alone! He didn’t have to do it all! He wasn’t expected to do it all!
Peter walked to his apartment, head lowered, hiding his grin. God, he loved you!
197 notes · View notes
eorzeasntm · 5 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
ENTM Tumblr Cycle 10 Round Seven Results
Hi folks!  Last week we sent our models out into some bad weather.  This round presents some unusual challenges, specifically capturing the environment and balancing dimmer lighting against the gloomy background.  
While all the models emerged from this round slightly damp (or dry if they were smart enough to get out of the rain), the model whose photo most captured the hearts and minds of our voters this round was:
Odharnait “Ona” Greene
Congratulations!  Rongi Pongi was so impressed with this picture that he said it will inspire a future round of ENTM called “Doors.”  The judges and community agreed that this shot was lovely and a fantastic use of the watercolor filter to brighten the stormy night. 
We have one more week in Tumblr Cycle 10.  In the meantime, ENTM Instagram Cycle 1 is in Week 2 and community voting will begin shortly!  Please visit our Instagram Page for more information. 
Also the October Haukke Manner challenge will be closing at 10 PM Eastern TODAY (Oct 24th) so hurry up and get your entry in for a chance to win a minion from the Mogstation.
Our judges have feedback for our models after the cut. 
Judge Kai
Adam: This is a nice shot. It looks like you're trying to outrace the coming storm and reach a safe haven before getting drenched. You did a good job with the lighting, and used the surrounding area to your advantage! It was a very smart decision to have those glowing flowers in the shot and surrounding you. I can believe that the light that is hitting you is coming from them, and that is why the area (and you) are brighter, despite the darkness that seems to be engulfing the area. There are only two things I can think to suggest. The first is I wish you were just a little closer in this image so we could see you better. Which also leads to my second. I might have gone for a slightly lighter outfit, color wise. Because the image, and the background, is so dark a lot of those black tones start to blend in with what's behind you. Overall, you did a great job!
James: First off, I don't know if you did this on purpose, but I find it very amusing and great timing that it looks as if the lightning is coming right down to touch your hand. Moving on from that, this is an image that, to me, seems to hold sadness or loss in it. It's like the rain is reminding you of something from the past, and it's very lovely is a melancholy sort of way. You definitely pop against the darker background, sticking with the blonds, white and lighter grays are helping you a lot in this image. The lighting is very good as well, but I am wondering what the source of the light is? Perhaps a lightning bolt? While the lighting is well done, it just seems a bit overlit for not having a light source in the area. I think you could have pulled back just a bit, and still gotten away with this image. Other than that, I think you did a very good job!
Ni'ko: I am going to assume, from the way that you look in this image, you're the type of cat that doesn't like to get wet. Well, I don't blame you and that doesn't look like the type of storm I would want to be hanging out in either. Overall this is a good image. The lighting is believable for the time of day. It could be a fire burning just out of view, and it's casting its light on you. I also like the outfit that you picked for a few reasons. It matches the surroundings very well and seeing that this is a darker image, your skin tone pops. The dark purple of the swimming trunks is a good pick, it stands out from the neutral earthy tones around you and gives something that draws the eye to you. The pose is a little awkward as if someone caught you in mid-run,  and you're leaving a lot up to the viewer in this instance with the story you're trying to convey but overall you did a good job!
Judge Vederah
Cowbot: There's a really great, almost ominous feeling to this screenshot. Positioning of your character to the object he's looking at is spot on and helps bring the eye across the entire image. Only issue I have is this image reads way to dark. I think if a bit more lighting was used then your character wouldn't blend into the background as much, and we'd be able to more clearly see the rain effect. That detail was almost completely lost with how dark this picture was. Ona: This is, in my opinion, the best use of a gpose filter I've seen in this entire competition. I love how the water color effect really amplifies the rain effect in the background. I also really appreciate how the cool and warm tones of this image come together in this shot.  The only thing I could think of to change is possibly a very small light used to the characters right- the only downside of the watercolor filter is it blurs a lot of the smaller details. Here it cast a very dark shadow on her scales, losing the definition in her face. Wren: This shot reminds me of the scene from the original, cartoon Snow White as she's making her way through the haunted forest.  I just love how innocent and genuinely frightened your character looks against such a foreboding backdrop.  Lighting is the only issue I have here. The background on the right portion of the screen is so dark that just reads as empty space. I think if you had upped the intensity of the lighting on that half of the image just a touch, it would've popped those details in the foreground.
Judge M’Telihgo
Nadede -  I like this.  I love how you stand out against the background.  I also like the umbral static weather effect very much.  I enjoyed playing with different settings and see how images turned out.  Have you ever done that?  It could be fun.  I do wonder what you are looking at while doing your chakra, you seem so intent on it.  I think the bright colors of your armbands and your pants pop against your pale skin.  Which leads to my only real criticism of this picture and is minor.  While your top has some color in it, I think it blends into you a little, not too much but another color may have been better.  Still, you look awesome!
Chee – I love the background.  I like dark colors and things that seem kind of spooky, and this has that for me.  I approve of the location.  For all of that, I like it very much.  Your outfit in a lighter blue makes you stand out against your very dark background and I think the colors suit you well.  There is one thing that makes it so that I cannot enjoy this picture as much as I would like to.  I’m not sure what happened, but there is a ghosting around your face as if you were caught between frames of an animation where it is starting to draw in the next one.  Sadly, that blur makes it so that looking at it for more than a moment makes my eyes water.  It’s a shame too since I really like it overall.
Lantis – Ooh.  I do like this spot for exactly this reason.  FIGHT!!  Anyway, there is a negative though when doing this at night.  Dead space.  I see where your addition of the sakura effect may have been used to try and counter this and it does help.  I also think that a little different timing of your sparring partner would really make this pop much more.  As it is right now, you are in action and your partner is looking away, at their shoes.  If you could have caught it where they are looking at you, it would definitely sell the action seen much more like they are trying to parry your blow by timing their draw.  Adventure on the high seas!  Kind of anyway.  I still give you credit for catching the lightning bolt just right, I’ve done it and I found it to be a chore.  Well done!
Judge Kusuh
Azalea: I'm a huge fan of the overall "mood" of the picture- a paladin standing in a dark storm; did they recently fail a mission? Are they brooding? Is this where the orchestra swells to give a tearful moment? As I've said before, when I'm left thinking about the possibilities behind an image, it's a good sign! This may be one of my favorite pictures from you so far. The setting, the use of the pencil filter to add more of a "rain" effect, and the overall pose show me that you've given some real thought to everything that goes into this picture. The frame choice is also something I love, but it also comes with this one small critique: when you use this frame, you are using it to trick the viewer into seeing three separate pictures in a single shot. When you have parts of yourself spilling over into the other two frames, this kills the illusion and just leaves the picture looking disjointed. My advice for a picture like this would be to play with your zoom and pose options so that you can fit yourself into a single frame! You're improving every week, I can't wait to see what comes next!
Haila: You have a wonderful sense of visual flow going on in this picture. At first glance, I can easily follow from the spark in the top left corner, down the spear, to your face, and then follow your eyes to your fingers and then off the right side of the image. The choice of color (and the limit of color) were also a smart choice here; the limited palette really adds a sense of impact. Something to think about: This is more on the side of a "high fashion" shot as opposed to a story shot. Don't get me wrong, I very much like both kinds, but one of the things I've seen many ENTM models get pointed out (myself included) is when a shot lacks a story. Your shots in the past have always been a mix of both fashion and story, and this one feels like it shoots straight to the side of fashion. Once again, this isn't really a bad thing, but it's something I want you to be aware of as you plan your final shots in the upcoming weeks. Excellent work so far!
Judge Rongi
Lily:  With this shot, I think you found a really great lighting that makes your character look gorgeous. You could crop out this whole shot and just have it on you, shoulders up, and it'd be a beautiful head shot. The shot itself fits the theme of the week, but I wish it had a little more oomph! to it. I have "Summertime Sadness" stuck in my head now thanks to you though. Haha. I would have loved to see more posing, a stronger background choice, and a clear reason for why you are standing in the rain. Rymm:  These colors are everything. Great choice in gear. I love that the backshot is 3/4 of the way so we can still see a bit of your face. I wish we could see more, but its just enough to not be a backshot dead on. I usually would be against a solid black background, but using the lightning and your outfit colors to pop out like that is amazing. Had you been wearing all black, this wouldn't have worked at all. I love the pose of both you and the lightning. It creates a really interested shape in the middle, like dancing. Ysildor: You are going to get electrocuted waving that pick around like that! I love the idea as it beckons to Thor's hammer. I wonder if you had tried or could use an hammer instead. The background has those nice buildings in it that creates a line across the image that leads the viewer straight to you. And then we follow your shape up in to the sky and back down with the lighting. Really well done composition wise. 
9 notes · View notes
mhdiaries · 4 years
Text
Diary of Toralei Stripe
Better have nine lives if I catch you reading my diary. 
July. Two. Five.
Ooh they’re telling math jokes now...
Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin Pi!
The math geeks I’m stuck on this bus with think that this is funny. So funny in fact, that the harpy sitting in front of me shoots milk out of her nose when she hears the punch line. I don’t think it’s funny at all. I’d rather be listening to the music I have stored on my iCoffin but two hours into our five-hour ride home my iCoffin gave up the ghost. It should have lasted the whole trip and then some except that one of my math camp roomies “accidentally” unplugged my iCoffin charger last night when she plugged in her fright light. I don’t even know why a ghost needs a fright light. What? Was she afraid she would trip over something and go “bump in the night?” I realized what happened when we woke up this morning but we had to leave first thing so I didn’t have time to put a full charge on it. At least I got enough battery life to block out the two hours dedicated to the singing of “X Number Bottles of Ghoul Juice on the Wall.” To add to the misery the seats on this bus only have room for two monsters and Meowlody and Purrsephone are of course sitting together which left me stuck in a seat next to a troll named Teala who had never been away from her bridge for more than a day until she came to math camp.She cried herself to sleep every night. Not that any other monster but me noticed but then again I notice everything. I also noticed Teala wasn’t laughing at any of the math jokes either. In fact she seemed to be more miserable than I was. Well now, here I was thinking she was missing her bridge but if that were the case why didn’t she seem excited about going home? “Dish,” I said. She turned and looked at me for a moment and then stared back ahead. “Okay - suit yourself then,” I said and then tried to curl up in the seat to take a cat nap which I had almost accomplished when she said; “My boy-fiend broke up with me...by text...the first night of math camp.” She still wasn’t looking at me but she wasn’t crying either. “He was my first real boyfriend and...and I don’t know why I’m telling you ‘cause you don’t seem to care about any monster besides yourself and you’ll probably figure out a way to use this to make me even more miserable.” I didn’t show it, but that really hurt. Just because I enjoy the chaos that a good practical joke brings doesn’t mean that I’m intentionally cruel does it? I don’t think it does and besides; where’s the fun of kicking some monster when they’re already down? It’s a lot more fun to see the surprise on a monster’s face when they think they’ve got it all together and you can “help them” see that they don’t. So I said, “Guess you better tell me the whole story then so I can do a thorough job.” That actually brought a ghost of a smile to her face. Teala told me that her ex boy-fiend was applying to colleges and that he decided he needed to keep his “options open” in case he might meet his “intellectual equal” at school. At first I didn’t believe he actually wrote that and then she showed me the text. “Does he really think he’s that smart,” I asked. She kind of shrugged and said, “He’s scary smart but not as good at math as I am, especially withy differential equations.” She told me he really wanted to get into this one school because his favorite mad scientist taught there. I’d never heard of the school but I knew who the mad scientist was because Mr. Hack made use watch a bunch of his videos in class. The videos were deadly boring but the mad scientist had this odd accent and strange speech pattern. I used to mimic his voice in class to make Mr. Hack jump. I’d wait until Mr. Hack’s back was turned and then scream, “Huhhacckkk - theeese stuuudannts reeelease youuu wuh-ill ah-yuat wa-unce!” It cost me several days in detention and a trip to Headless Headmistress Bloodgood’s office the last time I mimicked the mad scientist but even Mr. Hack admitted he couldn’t tell the difference between the scientist’s voice and my imitation of it. We talked about a few more things and then Teala finally fell asleep. I was able to finally fall asleep as well but not before having to hear another math joke followed by an explosion of milk from the seat in front of me.
July. Two. Eight.
I went to MH today to pick up some pictures I left in the FearBook office. When I was done I went up to the belfry. It’s a good place to keep an eye on things without other eyes watching you. It’s also a good place to take a nap. Usually the hunchback who rings the bells...the bells...works up there but he was on summer vacation in France or somewhere so I had the place to myself; until Spectra came floating through that is. She thinks that she’s very stealthy but it’s almost impossible to sneak up on me and I heard the rattle of her chains long before she actually appeared. I pretended to be asleep for a moment then with my eyes still closed I said, “What do you want Spectra?” “Oh, hello Toralei. Did you hear the news?” Most monsters don’t trust anything they hear from Spectra. I know better. There’s always an element of truth in her “news”. You just need to know how to listen. Here’s an example; Spectra told me she heard that Nefera is moving back to town and will be taking over for Ms. Kindergruber in Home Ick. Not only that but Ms. Kindergruber is also going to quit teaching to become a roadie for her favorite rock and roll band. Now as much fun as it is to imagine Ms. K. climbing stacks of amps while wearing a sleeveless leather vest, bandana and steel toed boots it’s not going to happen. Although when compared to the thought of Nefera actually “lowering herself” to teach, it’s practically a done deal Ms K will be hitting the road. I’m pretty sure out of that confusing jumble of information the one true fact is that Nefera is moving back to town and probably sooner rather than later...now there’s a monster who enjoys kicking some body when it’s down.
July. Three. Zero.
Got an email today from Teala, the troll girl I sat with on the ride home from math camp. Apparently her ex boy-fiend told her that he got a call from the mad scientist he wanted to study under. The scientist told her ex that his test scores indicated a “skuhh-ill weeeakness in diffuhh-wrenntial eeeequay-shunns” and that her ex should find some monster that was intellectually superior and “geeet sah-ummm tuutorr-ing”. Her ex was certain it was the professor since “no monster could fake that voice.” He also apologized to Teala for being an arrogant jerk and asked if she would tutor him in differential equations. Teala told him that she would have to check her schedule. Sometimes it is just purrrecious the way things work out for the beast.
August. One. Three.
I bought a ball of dragon thread today for Sweet Fangs. It’s just about the only material that’s strong enough to survive more than one play session with her. I don’t know what I’m going to do when Sweet Fangs gets bigger because I’m probably going to need the whole dragon and I’m not sure mom and dad are going to be good with that.
August. Two. Five.
M&P came over today. They’re like my sisters and I can’t imagine how boring unlife would be without them. We do just about everything together and some monsters even think we’re related but we’re not. Not that it matters since we don’t really care what other monsters think anyway. We are who we are and any monster or monsters that want to try and herd us better get ready for a long miserable day. Today we weren’t worried about being herded, today was a brainstorm session. Our mission, repay Cleo de Nile and her minions for not only ruining our perfectly planned graduation prank but also for taking away part of our valuable summer vacation by “arranging” our trip to math camp. Knowing that it was Cleo who got the better of us is almost as irritating as being wet or having my fur stroked the wrong way. I can’t believe that I actually helped her when she first wanted to be a part of the Fear Squad. Cleo didn’t even know how to do a cartwheel, much less a round off. So I took her under my claw and taught her everything I knew and since I’d been doing gymnastics from the time I was a kitten I knew a lot. I finally got Cleo to the point where she started to “get it” and instead of being a liability she started contributing. I figured that for all my hard work and leadership Nefera would make me the Fear Squad captain when she graduated. Only she didn’t - she passed it onto Cleo. I can still remember what Nefera said to me when I confronted her about it. “I didn’t want Cleo to succeed - I wanted her to be humiliated but since you helped her, you get to deal with the consequences.” Then Cleo acted as if she deserved to be the captain and that she automatically knew everything there was to know about leading the Fear Squad. She should have showed some humility and stepped aside. She didn’t so now it’s up to me to teach her some new lessons and I can’t wait for class to be back in session.  
August. Three. One.
There’s a meteor shower tonight, which will give us the purrrfect opportunity to practice the three D’s. Divert. Design. Demure. First I divert attention away from myself - although tonight the meteor shower should do that for me, next I design a “surprise” for my intended victim student and then after the unexpected happens I demure - “Oh my, what happened here?” More later...
Ended up scraping the three D’s tonight, mostly because the meteor shower diverted me. I was supposed to meet M&P at this coffee shop down close to the beach - it’s the only time I go to the beach since sand + water + fur = unhappy werecat - but they were late so I grabbed a catnipuccino and waited. The owner turned down the lights of the shop so it was almost dark and then the sky was falling. The ghouls showed up just as somewhere down the beach a monster started playing guitar and I said, “Just because we’ve got nine lives doesn’t mean we need to rush through this one.” And we didn’t.
29 notes · View notes
dapperkobold · 6 years
Text
Clueless Guide: Alarak (HotS)
So, you’re new to heroes of the storm and you see Alarak on sale. Hey, isn’t he supposed to be good or something? You pick him up, take him into a match and promptly get your face beat in. What happened?
Welcome to Clueless Guides: guides I write for people who have no idea what they’re doing. This isn’t a pro strategy guide. This isn’t an expert guide. This is a basic guide to get you rolling and begin to understand the character and its playstyle. My credentials? I’ve hit level 5 with Alarak. I’m not a pro by any means, but by now I have a good idea of how he ticks.
Alarak is an assassin, that is, his job is to kill stuff. Specifically enemy heroes. He’s tricky to pick up, very combo-focused, but with the right setup and reactions you can utterly mulch enemy heroes in a quite humorous fashion. However, this is a situation where practice is needed: Alarak is pretty fragile, so if you do things wrong you’ll die pretty fast.
Powers
Your trait will impact your play style greatly. It’s called Sadism and it’s very simple: you do double damage to heroes with your abilities.
If that doesn’t clear up Alarak’s job, I don’t know what will. Alarak wants to kill heroes. He wants to murder them to death. He wants to keep half the enemy team on respawn timers. He wants to secure map objectives by killing all enemies that come to claim them. He wants to push a lane by way of keeping the heroes who come to push back in the hospital. If your team is running behind in levels, make up the difference by killing more heroes.
Raynor? Pull him to you and much him. Hammer? Just can’t run away. Morales? Kill the medic first, you know. Uther? Let’s see how far that armor goes. Artanis? Ooh, a challenge. Abathur? JACKPOT. Alarak is all about killing enemy heroes.
Okay, maybe not before level 10. Before level 10 heroes aren’t worth as much exp as minions are, so don’t sweat too much about the literal kill, but you can still beat them into submission and chase them off with their tail between their legs.
What’s more, Sadism has some interesting interactions: every time you score a takedown, you get 3% more sadism, up to 30%. So by killing heroes you get better at killing heroes. It’s lost on death, but in my experience it’s not that much of an added penalty. However, some talents give better bonuses at the cost of reducing your Sadism amount. Don’t be too scared of these, most of them are worth it.
However, it should be noted that without the Sadism bonus Alarak’s abilities don’t do as much damage as most assassins’. As a result, Alarak is not going to be near as helpful for pushing lanes or taking out camps as other Assassins. He’ll just have to manage by killing more heroes. Ho hum.
His first ability is Discord Strike. It’s a skill ‘shot’ but it’s similar a long melee attack with an AoE. Enemies in the area take damage and are silenced for a short time, keeping them from using abilities. Note that this does not stop passive abilities, meaning that auto-attack assassins like Raynor or Zul’jin will care much less, but unlike Blind (which effectively disables basic attacks) there’s no hero which simply does not care about it. Even Raynor (who requires the least ability casting of any hero in the game) won’t be able to use some of his kit.
Discord strike does have an odd wind-up time that takes some getting used to, but it’s manageable. It’s a really good way to open a fight, especially combo’d with telekinesis.
Telekinesis is a fun utility ability. It does little damage, but that’s not the point. The point is that it lets you move anything that isn’t nailed down or a giant monster. You can push anything in reach any direction, just click and drag. Yes, the click and drag mechanic takes some getting used to, but it’s quite manageable once you figure it out. You will most commonly pull enemies into Discord Strike range, but you can also use it to move allies or yourself. Note that moving yourself is your only escape option: this is Alarak’s only mobility ability and as a result you need to be aware of when you activate it and when it comes off of cooldown.
In addition, since it does move literally any hero, minion, or non-boss mercenary, it’s really easy to accidentally scoot yourself into a bad situation or out of good placement. Practice is key, it takes a bit to get used to the distance and the width of the power, but once you do it’s well worth it.
Alarak’s third ability is Lightning Surge, a tricky ability that’s deceptively easy to use once you get the hang of it. you click a target, and that target gets zapped by lightning. However, the enemies between you and it will take the most damage. As a result, using it against a hero is a matter of picking something behind the hero to tether the lightning to, getting the hero hit with the middle damage. It’s surprisingly easy, the hit box is really forgiving, but it takes some getting used to. Now, there will be times where you simply don’t have that anchor point and you need to zap that hero directly, but you take what you can get.
In addition, every hero hit with lightning surge heals you some, but it’s not a lot. I wouldn’t bank on it for healing, especially since you can’t get it except in a fight with a hero, but it’s nice on occasion.
Deadly Charge is Alarak’s first heroic ability. You choose a direction and he charges up, showing you how far he’ll go. You just click again to charge the shown distance, or move to cancel at no penalty. It’s a good, fast mobility tool made for starting combats, and it’s very effective if the enemy is bunched together and not expecting a murderer to barrel into them. However, the fact that you stay immobile while charging and any damage interrupts the ability means that it’s not useful for escaping the enemy.
Counter Strike is Alarak’s other heroic ability. You activate it and Alarak freezes on the spot, ignoring all damage for one second. If a hero tries to damage you in that second, you release a huge shockwave of murder. Yes, it’s as cool as it sounds. It’s tricky to know when to use it, it ONLY activates from hero damage, but when used correctly it’s very effective.
What’s more, Alarak’s heroic abilities have something special: you get one at tenth level, and if you want you can then get the other at 20th. The second heroic ability takes over the D key, and it opens up worlds of insane supermurder combos.
Easy Build:
This is the part of the guide where I give you some trait builds. This build here that I’m about to show you is NOT made to be great. It’s made to be easy: easy to pick up, easy to use, to help you learn the character. Active Traits and Quest Traits are going to be avoided as they’re kind of complex and can be confusing with a new character. Similarly, traits that make big changes to how an ability works are going to be avoided, since the idea is for you to get used to the core character. As a result, this build is not what you want to use for serious gaming with this character. 
However, by coincidence, it does result in a pretty flexible Alarak
Level 1: Sustaining Power
A bit of added healing from Lightning Surge is appreciated, but I still don’t recommend you bank on its healing power.
Level 4: Negatively Charged
You may wonder why I chose a quest trait here over the non-quest trait. That’s because this Quest trait is far easier to use and gives more up-front: It increases the damage in the middle of Lightning Surge, and then when you hit heroes with the middle of Lightning Surge (which you should be doing anyway) you get even more damage. The non-quest talent gives you a little bit extra damage if you hit one hero with three abilities inside two seconds. It’s just complicated and the bonus damage isn’t worth the effort.
Level 7: Hindered Motion
Applied Force at this level is ALSO really good, but I like the slow placed on enemies. It makes Discord Strike easier to hit, and also opens up the enemy to punishment from your allies.
Level 10: Counter Strike
Actually, this one is up to player choice. If you prefer Deadly Charge, that’s fine, go for it. They’re both good abilities, I just prefer Counter Strike.
Level 13: Pure Malice
Increase sadism by 10% each time an ally dies, up to 40%. That was easy. It’s all lost when you die, sure, but if you have a team that has trouble with living this might be worth it.
Level 16: Mocking Strikes
Usually I don’t really take to talents that improve my power against enemies suffering from certain afflictions, but usually I’m not playing Alarak. Alarak has a AoE ability that inflicts silence by raw, the level 7 talent gives a slow to the ability you use to pull enemies into melee, there’s just not a lot of reason not to take it.
Level 20: Deadly Charge
I just love both of Alarak’s Heroics and want them both. Also, it’s less likely to mess you up than the two active talents at this level.
Darth Alarak Build:
Ha ha, yes, obvious joke is obvious, but really Alarak is so much more menacing and dangerous than most of the Sith in Star Wars I consider him an honorary Sith, no matter how obvious the joke is.
The actual build is just a quest-heavy maximum murder Alarak. As long as you use those abilities well, the quests should be completed soon enough.
Level 1: Extended Lightning
Reduce Sadism a smidge, and get a bonus from hitting heroes with the middle of Lightning Surge. You get the range increase fast, you eventually get a slow, and if you luck out and hit three heroes with one surge you get all the rewards up-front and get your Sadism deposit back. Cool.
Level 4: Chaos Reigns.
I bet you thought that I was going to choose Negatively Charged again, didn’t you? Actually, that’s not a bad choice and it’s common on Alarak Lightning builds. Getting progress on two quests per hero hit is nothing to scoff at, but I prefer giving Discord Strike some love given how much you’ll be using it. This one only gives you a bonus at 15 hits, but it also gives a bonus after hitting two heroes at once. And if you hit three? You get the full unlock immediately.
Level 7: Hindered Motion.
It’s just a really good slow! If you’re fine with the slow from Extended Lightning and want to go for Applied Force here, I sure won’t speak against you, but I like the Hindered Motion slow.
Level 10: Counter Strike
...most of the time. they’re both really good.
Level 13: Rite of Rak’shir
Basically, you mark a hero and hitting that hero with Discord Strike or killing them gives you bonus Sadism with no cap. This is more or less THE bigtime Alarak talent, you master Alarak, you more or less want this every game. I’m not a master Alarak, but even so a few marked kills can give you a immediately noticeable advantage. Just don’t mark D.va: it only counts if you KILL her, not just her Meka.
Level 16: Mocking Strikes
With added slow from Extended Lightning, this only becomes a better choice.
Level 20: Deadly Charge
I just love both his heroic abilities and if a game gets to 20th level I will take it happily. The way they’re drastically different, the utility they give, the ability to slide into combat with deadly charge and then just immediately clean up with Counter Strike is just too good!
That kind of combo ability is what makes Alarak scary: In the right situation you can just wade into the enemy team and kill them all. If you mis-judge that situation you are simply dead, yes, but when you pull it off?
That’s a thing of violent, violent beauty.
4 notes · View notes
rantsaboutponies · 6 years
Text
My Little Pony: The Movie
Yes, this is the 2017 one I’m talking about. I’m not going to pull a switcheroo and review the 1986 one. Like I said, bad title.
If you want to read along while watching the movie, you may do so as long as you’re not in a theater. DO NOT LOOK AT YOUR PHONE IN THE THEATER. I don’t care if you turned the brightness down or if you hold it in your lap; EVERYONE CAN STILL SEE IT. YOU’RE BEING AN ASSHOLE.
Anyway, on with the review! Spoilers abound, so fair warning!
Oh, and this movie is rated PG for “mild action”. What the hell is wrong with you, MPAA?
Good lord, the absolute grandiosity of the title logo... All right, all right, I’m not going to nitpick something as minor as the logo. Calm down.
My thought process: “Hey, this synth bit sounds kinda like the intro to ‘We Got the Beat’ by The Go-Go’s. I wonder if they realize that.”
Two seconds later: “OH, FUCK, IT IS. IT IS THAT SONG. NO. STOP. STOP RIGHT NOW. RRRRRGGGGGHHHH.”
Well, THAT threw me for a loop! Holy shit, am I glad the show’s budget isn’t large enough to include covers of popular songs.
Ah, we’re showcasing the new animation with a flyover/through of Canterlot. I’m not going to be mentioning the animation quality every other paragraph (even though I could), so instead I’ll just say everything up front. I mentioned in an earlier post that it looked like the animators were suddenly unaware of how to use the program, as though they had all traded jobs or something. It turns out that wasn’t far off! According to sources, the animation software being used on this movie is Toon Boom Harmony, not Flash, so the animators working on this movie are either 1. the same animators using an unfamiliar program, or 2. different animators who are used to working with Harmony but are not used to animating this show. And if you look at the stuff they’ve worked on, they’re all either just 2D (The Simpsons, The Congress) or just 3D (The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water), not anything that has attempted to integrate both. The opening shot of the ponies flying through the clouds and through Canterlot looks like 2D assets trying to move through a 3D environment! It doesn’t help that the 3D assets (like the buildings and the landscape) are all really, really cheap-looking, like they were resources saved from a movie from 10-20 years ago and never updated. Also, the 3D assets tend to move fluidly (like 3D assets do), whereas the 2D assets attached to the same figure move with a lower framerate (like 2D assets do), which is a little jarring.
And holy crap, look at those two characters walk towards the screen! That’s some first-year animation student work right there!
Okay, okay, I said I wasn’t going to harp on the animation the whole time. Fine. Instead, here’s a complaint I’m sure will sound familiar to regular readers: Wow, you really like your exposition dumps right out of the gate, don’t you, writers? Except this time, you don’t have the excuse of “Well, we only had 22 minutes, so we had to get all the information out there quickly!” This movie is 99 minutes long! That’s four-and-a-half times the length! At this point, it’s just sloppy!
Random pony: Princess Twilight is great under pressure!
Twilight: Oh, my goodness, I can’t handle this!
Trombone: Wah-wah!
Oh, goddamnit, are we bringing back the wah-wah jokes? Son of a...
GAH! That closeup shot of Twilight is just creepy! Adding more details just because you’re closer to a subject isn’t always the best idea!
“What’chu talkin’ ‘bout?” FUCK STOP FUCK STOP FUCK STOP FUCK
Still creepy! Why do her eyes look like that? This is unsettling! Please stop focusing on her face!
Ha, Pinkie Pie was blowing a balloon into the camera, and then she turned and revealed it’s actually a really long balloon, but we couldn’t see that because of the angle we were watching from! Ha ha ha! ...Was...was that meant to be a joke? Because I really can’t figure out what other reason you would have to show it that way. These new animators are bizarre.
Oh, hey, she was making Discord! He’s not actually in the movie, but, you know, fanservice!
All right, Angel dressed as a parrot made me chuckle, but why the hell would Fluttershy force him to do that?
“Faster if I do my Sonic Rainboom!” How? How would that help you complete this task any faster? What sense does that make? Oh, wait, don’t tell me...fanservice.
“Raised in a barn!” Yes, thank you. You have beaten that joke thoroughly into the ground by now. Please move on.
Ah, good, Pinkie Pie is continuing her trend of being loud, irritating, and making things worse by opening her stupid face. Some things haven’t changed.
Okay, this is two songs in the first eight minutes. Just how many are there?
“Eeyup!” HE SAID IT.
Yeah, you can show me Cheese Sandwich all you want. I know “Weird Al” isn’t in this movie.
Security guard #1: “Do you have visual on the buttercream?”
Security guard #2: “Visual confirmed, go for cleanup.”
...
Audience: *cough*
I mean, they left in a pause for laughter and everything. They were expecting that to get a laugh.
Balloon: *gets squished*
Random background pony: Bryan! Noooooo!
Me: 
I don’t...I’m not...are these...jokes? I’m...I...
You’d think they’d have heard of this villain. He seems like he has a wide sphere of influence.
“There’s one of you! And hundreds of us!” Yes, Luna, I’m sure they brought that giant airship because there’s only one of them. This is why you’re not in charge.
Wow, the, uh...the crystals forming over Cadence are, um...am I allowed to say anything more about the animation?
DURR HURR IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT THEY GOT TWILIGHT BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY DERPY AND ANYTHING INVOLVING DERPY IS FUNNY. FAAAAAAANSERRRRRRVIIIIIIIIIICE.
Every word out of this minion’s mouth makes me want to punch him. It’s Michael Peña’s best role since CHiPs! Apparently he ad-libbed most of his dialogue. It shows.
“Yay.” SHE SAID IT.
“Boingy boingy boingy boingy!” UGH.
Pinkie Pie: “Anypony up for a game of I Spy?”
Everypony else: “UGH.”
See? SEE?! I’m not the only one! She’s even starting to annoy the other main characters by this point! What are you even doing?
So Tempest got...a phone call...except it’s not a phone call, it’s a potion that you pour into a brazier...but it still has a ringtone...and it sounds like a dial-up connection... How do they use it more than once? Also, FUCK YOU WITH YOUR STUPID FUCKING
Why does the Storm King’s emblem look like the Starcraft II logo?
“Sorry, bad spell service.” FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Meanwhile, in the town from Assassin’s Creed...
“Hmm. Interesting.” Well, I know someone who’s getting a lot of furry fetish fanart made of him!
“I’ll take the picture of your sister!” Heh. Okay, movie. That’s two.
Wow, Taye Diggs’s voice does not fit that character design.
“...parts will fall off.” Did the guy immediately grab for his crotch when he said that? Wow, movie! Where’s your PG for “mild rude humor”?
Someone should tell the animators that Spike isn’t pursuing Rarity anymore. Since, like, Season 2.
Oh, god, don’t sing! I was kind of starting to like you, Capper! This doesn’t really seem in-character!
Why does it seem like this character would have been Discord if they hadn’t “redeemed” him like three times by this point?
Yes, Fluttershy is afraid of bats. Great knowledge of the character there, movie.
“Ooh! So many fun breakables!” Fuck you, Pinkie.
Good lord, Emily Blunt really could be intimidating if she weren’t undercut by Michael Peña at every fucking TURN! It’s the slugs from Epic all over again!
Yes, “The Girl from Ipanema”. A common song all throughout Equestria or the Badlands or whatever. The random popular songs interspersed throughout a movie (based on a show that does not HAVE them) that also has its own original songs really do not fit! They really don’t! Just because you can afford it now doesn’t mean you have to do it.
“WAIT!” *random cat noise* That...might have made sense if you didn’t play those two sounds at the same time. I’m not sure how he could talk and yowl simultaneously. Come on, sound editors.
Boy, how convenient that Tempest found them at that exact point, huh?
Y’know, showing Pinkie Pie grinning like an idiot as they’re all running for their lives doesn’t exactly endear me to her, animators.
Oh, no! Pinkie fell! What a tragedy! Maybe if you let her die, she wouldn’t keep fucking up your shit!
GOD, I HATE THIS FUCKING MINION.
Bird Guy: “We scar ‘em...”
Rarity: *gasp*
Bird Guy: “...emotionally!”
Fluttershy: *cries*
Pff... All right, you got me! That one was actually worth an audible laugh! That makes you three for...I don’t know, fifty?
I have a serious question. Was this supposed to be released in 3D, but then they dropped that for some reason? There seems to be a lot of “stuff coming straight toward the camera” action.
Are we seriously still doing the “people trying to kill each other stop when the shift whistle blows” joke? That was old 50 years ago!
I’m not sure I’ve seen a musical with songs this...out of nowhere. I mean, I’m sure worse examples exist, but none that I’m familiar with.
Are these pirates supposed to be...giant parrots (because, y’know, pirates and parrots)? Why does this world have giant parrots? Everything in the entire series is the size it is in the real world. Including the parrots we saw earlier in the movie! Why giant parrots?
Ah, good, Rainbow Dash is still a FUCKING IDIOT. Glad you’re keeping that change from the show, too!
So let me get this straight. Storm King is concerned about projecting an image of fearsomeness and strength...but he sells bobbleheads of himself as merchandise? You know, you don’t have to be this stupid, movie! You don’t! You really don’t!
GOD, they need to stop showing closeups of their faces. THEY’RE. SO. CREEPY.
“Oh, this is inteeeeeense!” WELL, IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN IF YOU HADN’T SAID THAT. LET A MOMENT LAND, MOVIE. LET. A MOMENT. FUCKING. LAND.
Oh, good, here’s where that terrifying shot from the trailer comes in.
And Rarity stopped to look at herself in the mirror while falling to her death. HURR HURR HURR.
Oh, look! Pinkie is about to get them killed again! GET RID OF HER.
“That’s it! I simply cannot even!” Oh, fuck off. Whoever wrote that line, fuck off.
“I hate epic adventures!” I’m sure starting to.
Wow, Twilight, you held your breath for, like, 10 seconds. Good job.
Well, here it is. We knew it was coming. Seaponies. Honestly, even though I should be annoyed (because FANSERVICE), they actually fit this world pretty well (way better than giant anthropomorphic cats or whatever the hell the inhabitants of that Badlands city were).
But then they turn the Mane Six into seaponies.
And I’m reminded of “The Crystal Empire (Part 2)”.
And you only introduced these characters to sell new toys of the Mane Six, didn’t you?
And fuck you.
“Yay.” SHE SAID IT. AGAIN.
Don’t sing. Please don’t sing. I think what makes these songs even more out-of-nowhere is the fact that all the other non-pony characters are immediately in on the song, no matter how they were feeling or what they were doing right before it started.
Um...Twilight’s not wrong, you guys! Everyone you’ve come across so far has tried to fuck you over! Including the seaponies! Why wouldn’t she just try to steal the thing?
But, of course, she wouldn’t get captured if everyone else didn’t leave her all alone to mark the act break. The rest of them are even seen sitting on a gray and dismal seashore afterwards! Jesus Christ, it’s like all the tropes from Scriptwriting for Children’s Movies 101 are in this thing! You are allowed to try harder than this, you know!
Twilight: Why are you doing this? You’re a pony, like me!
Me: I’m nothing like you!
Tempest: I’m nothing like you!
Me: Come on!
Oh, god, don’t sing. I can hear the lead-in. I can see you want to express your emotions and fill in your backstory so badly! Please don’t! Please don’t please don’t please don’t AGGGGGHHHHH
Man, I bet when the Ursa Major scratched her face, Tempest bled so! Ha! ...I’m sorry.
Are you kidding me? She has the same character motivation as Starlight Glimmer? Her friends (all two of them) left her in one particular incident, so now she’s sworn off friendship forever (instead of just, I don’t know, finding new friends? You had to have had more than two.)
Hold on, did Tempest...beam that flashback into Twilight’s head? Because otherwise, I don’t know how she would have gathered that information.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in! Himself!” Um...burn?
NO. BULLSHIT. HOW DID THEY ESCAPE? HOW? IT DOESN’T COUNT IF YOU DON’T SHOW IT. WHY WOULD YOU CUT OUT A POTENTIALLY AWESOME ACTION SCENE FOR THIS SHIT? NO. FUCK YOU.
Then again, there are only five pirates left. I guess the rest were slaughtered.
Honestly, the Storm King just looks like Tirek. They might as well have reused him.
Boy, I haven’t seen Liev Schreiber play such an nonthreatening villain since X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Blast from the past! I’m glad he’s been in the movie so much up to this point so that I actually give a shit about him being the main bad guy for the last 20 minutes!
Uh-huh. And where were the other two pirates hiding? Only three jumped out of that cake.
The guard was taken down by...cupcakes. Do you even care anymore?
HOLY FUCK PINKIE’S FACE IS TERRIFYING. NEVER SHOW ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE SERIOUSLY GOING TO GIVE CHILDREN NIGHTMARES.
And he’s using Spike like a flamethrower. He can’t...oh, whatever.
Why does she even need her horn restored? She seems pretty powerful as she is.
“Why are you saving me?” “Because this is what friends do.” No, this is what decent fucking people do! if you’re about to watch someone die and you can do something to prevent it, you don’t have to be their friend to do so! You just have to be not a sociopath!
Oh, no! Twilight flew off with the main villain! She’s dead for sure! Oh, what? She’s not? What a shock. Nice heavy-handed angelic imagery, by the way.
Couldn’t she have blasted the XBOX rock out of the way or grabbed it or something instead of letting it hit her?
“So...now what?” “Now we rebuild.” No, wait, that’s the ending from San Andreas. A much better movie, I might add.
OH, THE FIRST ONE THEY DECALCIFIED WAS DERPY. EVERYTHING IS DERPY. DERPY DERPY DERPY.
Okay, who the hell was the “Way to go, guys!” pony? That was very obviously supposed to be someone specific, but I am unaware of this behind-the-scenes tidbit.
So they unfroze everypony, but they still didn’t fix Tempest’s horn? What a bunch of dicks!
“You know, your horn is pretty powerful, just like the pony it belongs to.” Didn’t I say that? What the hell was the conflict here?
That’s what you end the movie on, eh? Pinkie Pie’s squealing? Okey dokey then.
AND DERPY’S IN THE CREDITS TOO HERF DERF WERF LERF
And, of course, no kids’ movie would be complete without LUKAS GRAAAAAAAHAM.
Wait, Rachel Platten sang that cover of “We Got the Beat”? The singer who gave us “Fight Song”? Well, no wonder it sucked!
Rating: 1/4 stars.
This movie had a review embargo on it on Rotten Tomatoes until the release date. That’s never a good sign.
I think maybe they thought that, by making the movie darker, it would make it more suitable for theatrical viewing. It doesn’t. It’s just...odd. Especially when they add really stupid jokes to lighten the tone.
I can say that you can probably see the movie without having seen the show, which is a positive. There aren’t any plot details that require outside information to understand, but WOW is there enough fanservice if that’s what you’re looking for. In fact, it might be better if you haven’t seen the show because boy, oh, boy, do they introduce a lot of characters that the ponies on the show would definitely be aware of if this made any sense. On that note, if this is set in the canon Equestria from the show, then holy shit are the ponies the most callous and/or oblivious sociopaths I’ve ever seen in a children’s program. Not only are they all apparently completely unaware of the fact that everything outside of Equestria is complete shit (aside from the fact that everywhere seems to be impoverished, they’re all totally oblivious to the fact that the Storm King has taken over THE REST OF THE WORLD), but they don’t actually fix that by the end! I guess the hippogriffs can come out of hiding now, and the Storm King’s faceless henchmen all seem to be good guys at the end since they’re all at the party, but for all we know, the badlands are still inhabited entirely by goblin monster things and their shady black market shit! We never saw what happened to them! And if the parrots are now all pirates instead of merchants, does that mean they’re going to start robbing everyone? Congratulations, Rainbow Dash! You’ve significantly increased the amount of crime across the entire world! Good job, you fucking idiot!
Twilight is ridiculously selfish, which is really odd considering we know she knows better by this point. Her moral in this movie is that she has to learn to rely on her friends and not just try to do everything based on her own effort and ideas. Y’know, AGAIN. How many fucking times has Twilight had to learn this lesson over and over and over again? And people say that Fluttershy’s episodes are repetitive.
I was hoping that at some point I would become used to the animation. For comparison, Fantastic Mr. Fox has a really ugly animation style, but you don’t really think anything of it after the first 20-30 minutes. That never happened with this movie. Every time I thought I was getting used to the animation style, someone would turn or move or make a face, and it would just look creepy or just plain awful again.
You know what’s kind of sad, though? Emily Blunt is really good in this. She’s really putting in a lot of effort for this character, and the design is pretty good, too! She’s actually kind of awesome, especially compared to Liev Schreiber (who so could not have given less of a shit about his role) and Michael Fucking Peña, who are just terrible. Even if I didn’t entirely understand her nonsensical motivation, Tempest was honestly the best part of the movie.
Boy, between this and Leap!, if an animated movie advertises that it “features an original song by Sia”, run!
4 notes · View notes
prinzenhasserin · 7 years
Text
Dear Trick or Treater
Dear Trick or Treater!
Please don’t feel obligated to use my prompts! This letter is just in case you might want to poke at some more of my prompts/likes. Generally, I’m open to a lot, and I will be delighted with any rating from gen to explicit. My AO3 account is here.
If you want to write me a crossover, great! If you need to check if I know the canon please go through the mods.
My prompts are pretty ridiculous in places. That is not a preference to the treat-side, that’s just where my brain goes first. If you want to scare me, then definitely go for the creeping existential horror. It doesn’t even need to be detailed, I freak out really easily.
(If this letter cribs a lot from my other letters, it’s because I’m lazy, and my likes don’t change around that much :D You can find some of my other letters under the exchange letter tag. I hope you have fun creating!)
General likes:
loyalty
odd couples
found family, dysfunctional families that nevertheless love each other
historical stories for same-sex pairings that aren't unhappy but that fit with the society of the time (so like, spinster ladies living together; bachelors-for-life)
cultural differences, age differences, height differences
heists, rescue missions
dragons, fairy tales, magical realism, urban fantasy
competent characters
people not realising they’re the most competent at their job/hobby
people failing their way to success
happy endings, earning your happy ending, open yet hopeful endings
cynical humour
mutual pining
suits, corsetry, fancy dresses
Identity shenanigans (secret identities, mistaken identities)
Blatant Lies
Enemies becoming friends and/or lovers
outsider POV
epistolary
orange/blue morality (that is, not entirely human morality); grey/grey morality
people not usually found in law enforcement solving crimes
non-verbal expressions of affection
Kinks:
wall sex
shifting power dynamics
semi-public sex
lots of foreplay, drawn out orgasms, edging
desperate sex, drunk sex, we-just-can’t-help-it!sex, sex for life-affirming
sex toys
sex toys in public (though I get embarrassed if someone else notices)
General dislikes:
infidelity in mentioned pairings
suicide
non-con (dub-con is totally fine though; as are consent issues due to power imbalances, people not knowing all the facts, or drunken sex-polleness)
The Graveyard Book - Neil Gaiman
Silas, Miss Lupescu
trick or treat; fanart or fanfiction
I'm very interested in their backstory, alone and together -- how did they meet? What's the purpose of the honour guard aside from killing all the Jacks?
But if you want to explore Miss Lupescu’s death — that would also be terrific (fix it! or make me cry because I will cry; either way is good)
Also here for: what scares a vampire? Other adventures Miss Lupescu went on. Where did she learn how to cook? What's up with the ghoul fighting? (How do Silas and Miss Lupescu earn a living? Do they pay taxes?)
Wynonna Earp (TV)
Xavier Dolls
trick or treat; fanart or fanfiction
Xavier Dolls is (SPOILER ALERT) a dragon. What's up with that? Does he hoard weapons? books? uncomfortable situations?
I'd be very interested in something that explored his supernatural side. Does his dragon-self work like a werewolf? Is he only mostly dragon? does he need to bathe in lava to grow?
Also terrific would be: Xavier Dolls knows that dragons exist, and revenants -- but ghosts?
Alternatively, Dolls hoards a collection of hats. Doc and Wynonna can never know.
Nirvana in Fire (TV)
Consort Jing
Trick or Treat; fanart or fanfiction
Consort Jing is very quiet. She also has a lot of dead friends. Maybe she's constantly surrounded by them?
Or: The real reason nobody stands in her way is that she’s a world class assassin. Or a witch, maybe.
Would also most definitely read a lot of words before anyone died and she was happy. Would also read her mothering her son, or Lin-shu, or quietly helping the other concubines in the palace.
Gokusen (Manga)
Sawada Shin, Yamaguchi Kumiko
Trick or Treat; fanart or fanfiction
Holiday-appropriate fic! Ghost houses! A school trip to the ghost forest where people kill themselves. One of these three is not like the other, but I would read all sorts of stories about these characters. Post-canon would be great, but anything goes really. I'd like additional appearances by any other of the cast, but it would be icing on the cake.
Focusing on just one character would be terrific. Kumiko has adventures with another class, or her minions! Shin goes to Africa, but gets lost in a different universe on the way there!
I ship Shin/Yankumi but gen is delightful also.
10 Things I hate about you
Kat Stratford, Patrick Verona
treat or trick; fanart or fanfiction
Kat and Patrick go to make-out in an abandoned factory. Too bad there's a ghost interrupting them every five minutes.
Would also read: Zombie apocalypse; Kat is a literal witch who devours boys and Patrick is her (virgin?) sacrifice. Obviously, you can probably come up with much better stories :D A look at what they do in ten, twenty years would be great, too! Separately, even!
Miss Marple - Agatha Christie
Jane Marple
treat or trick, fanart or fanfiction
St. Mary Mead’s police is convinced there’s a ghost robbing/murdering people. Miss Marple is convinced they have all been too deep in the bottle.
Miss Marple has always been able to see ghosts. They usually have nothing much to say, and are quite nonsensical, but this one is different.
Or: zombie apocalypse! Or it’s Miss Marple who is the ghost.
Rivers of London - Ben Aaronovitch
Molly
treat or trick; fanart or fanfiction
Tbh, I just want Molly to be the protagonist of her own adventures. Molly is the best at riding the Folly of vermin like bed bugs, ghosts and the occasional angry spirit. Her cooking is a little bit magic.
Or: She has to fight with the traders at the market for magic ritual ingredients every time, since the Folly isn’t well liked among the demi-monde.
Also, what’s up with her heritage? Fae? Not Fae?
Original Works
Space Traveler, Incubus, Ghost Jellyfish, Incompetent Fortune Teller, Part-Time Ghost Exorcist, Eldritch Abomination In A Human Skin-Suit, Time-Travelling Artificial Intelligence, Long Abandoned Sentient Ship
trick or treat; fanart or fanfic
I think these tags speak pretty much for themselves. Feel free to combine them! I read anything from gen to explicit. Femslash, slash or any other relationships are great, too. If you want to take a look at my likes/dislikes see my letter.
How would a ghost jellyfish be different from a non-ghost jellyfish? Why would it turn into a ghost?
What kind of ghost stories do they tell in space? Space halloween traditions?
Tbh, I would read a story containing all those characters. It is by no means necessary, though!
Space Traveller: Tell me of the Halloween traditions that survive into the space age! Are there new traditions? What kind of scary stories do they tell in space?
Incubus: I have a thing for magical creatures doing totally mundane things, while being supernatural about it. Would also work for me if combined with any of the other characters! Also here for an Incubus dub-conning someone with sex pollen.
Ghost Jellyfish: How would that work? How would a ghost jellyfish be different from a non-ghost jellyfish? Why would it turn into a ghost? Maybe it’s a familiar of the Part-Time Ghost Exorcist?
Incompetent Fortune Teller: Ooh. In what way are they incompetent? Do they tell people what they want to hear, because they are incompetent at telling the future? Or are they incompetent at being a fortune teller, and tell people their future? Maybe they only see two seconds into the future -- maybe they are cursed and nobody believes the truth they are telling ;) Would also read if the Incompetent Fortune Teller was made incompetent by the Time-Travelling AI and was pretty angry about that... or any other combination, really
Part-Time Ghost Exorcist: As I mentioned, I love when the mundane meets the supernatural. What’s the other part-time? Is the ghost exorcising business only hiring part-time workers so they don’t have to insure their workers? (This is admittedly very US centric. Would also love an AU where a part-time job can have a living wage! Or any other setting) Would also love a space travelling ghost exorcist. 
Eldritch Abomination In A Human Skin-Suit: Existential horror freaks me out pretty quickly, but this is such an interesting concept. Why is the Eldritch Horror using a Human Skin Suit? Because they can? Is it like, a life-style choice? Is the EA doing it for the experience, or to be edgy? Would also read if the Eldritch Horror is the thing that gets exorcised. Would also read if there’s no existential horror.
Time-Travelling Artificial Intelligence: What is the AI doing while time-travelling? Does anyone find them out? Why is it time-travelling? Does it abide by Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics? Would also read a story where the AI figures out to be human -- or tries having sex with someone, or maybe they get best upon by an Incubus and there’s confusion all around.
Long Abandoned Sentient Ship: How does the sentience work out, did it become sentient through its abandonment, or is the ship even self-aware? Does it model itself on its creators? Is the ship going crazy in a mild way, or in a creepy way? Or maybe the sentience isn’t very human-like, and it doesn’t need contact at all, and is just merrily continuing its mission to map the unknown space? Maybe it collects hitchhikers. Maybe nobody knows how or who had created it, and it’s just there.
1 note · View note