Listening is a very important skill, it is observance without filter.
You as an individual have your own filters and therefore your listening is tainted or distorted into an individual sense rather than a collective sense.
Listening with individual filters or attachments leads to ‘problems’ because you are looking through your individual lens, through your Own filters. So when something happens you filter it and claim it as yours. You are becoming your version of it rather than observing it as what it truly is. You are compartmentilising self into your self, you think of self as belonging to you alone. Self is not only yours, everyone has self but it is thought of as individual selves. Each of those selves (cells) has its own role to play, a role that is chosen in advance with free will, choice. Like a job, you are born and you grow and experience and you begin to form a pattern by what you are drawn to, you feel a pull toward certain possibilities that you wish to experience. You choose and you create that experience intuitively. Without trying.
Ill explain the difference between choice/freewill and the pull. The pull is not a override of your free will, it does not negate free will, the pull is the invisible thread or cord that you grow intuitively as you move through choice/freewill. The pull/thread is born through experience gained through choice and strengthened/amassed through repeated experience. So if you create the same experience everyday you empower that experience thread until it becomes automatic, self sufficient, self fulfilling and self sustaining. It becomes independent, a part, (not apart) A circle/cycle.
Repeated experience is beneficial when used positively, affirmations, meditation, being in nature etc. But be open to experience happening rather than actively creating an experience by meticulously planning with only your mind. Hold the true pure simple intent within yourself of believing and knowing that all the experiences that happen are created are wonderfully beautiful and beneficial. Every single one. Your thread grows naturally and intuitively using your heart/love as a guide.
The mistake is made when you artificially create your thread with thought and meticulous planning thinking yourself into the future, the what if and then planning for the what ifs, dissecting experience into tiny little pieces that you manipulate into experience. That creates those artificial threads, artificial and automatic, you have then created an automatic artificial self sufficient self fulfilling self sustaining artificial separate independent part. The false self. This automation is not free wiil. You feel unfree, like you are on a conveyor belt going round and round.
You then forget. You believe that the automated separate part is who you are and you become it. You forget that that thread that has become independent was created by you;,its a part (not apart) of you, that you are so much more than that thread, you grew and created that thread through repeated experience, and then you trapped your self in the automated system by believing that the automatic override is who you actually are.
Use repeated experience wisely and remember that the only true repeated experience should be that of being positively open to any given experience.