#on this blog we love and support everyone who plays games on easy mode

[asleepinawell]

hi Sarah, idk if I missed it but have you posted your thoughts on pathologic before?

hmm, I don't think I have. it was pathologic 2 specifically that I played. never tried the first one

I generally really liked pathologic 2. the atmosphere and aesthetic were completely on point and I actually bought it without knowing a thing about it after my friend sent me a screenshot of the plague doctor executors. I was just like ah yes a game for me. also playing it during a pandemic was, uh, quite something. but I like the tone of it and the mounting sense of desperation and how random and surreal it is. like the one part where you have to report to the town hall and the whole town freezes and you follow the trail of pointing tragedians was super cool. also the soundtrack was great and that opening where you walk through the doomed town gave me chills. and I loved the bulls! and artemy's snarky dialogue

oh also the mind map as the 'journal' or task page or whatever was a really cool system and I wish other games would try out something similar

on the flip side I had a low tolerance for some of the meta stuff with mark immortell which just felt kinda pretentious. I know a lot of people loved it but not my thing. to add to that I didn't like the very similar tone the actual devs took when they were finally convinced to add difficulty sliders for the game. that said something like 'we understand not everyone wishes to be enlightened by their experience' or something equally pretentious. their whole shtick has been making games so difficult and grueling that most people will never finish them. and no thanks, I will never think that adding accessibility options to games is a bad thing

on a somewhat related note, I had the misfortune to play it on console which I would really strongly advise against. the console versions crash constantly, corrupts your save files (sometimes multiple saves in the stack), has ridiculous load times to....walk down the street and while your game is trying to load the next area and you're frozen in place the rest of the game might start back up and oops you've been stabbed to death or caught the plague before you get control back. considering that each time you die you get a permanent penalty applied retroactively to all your saves, this sucks and makes the game even more miserable to play on top of the intended frustrations. so don't play on the console. (the pc version is much better). but yeah when you die because the game froze up briefly and then have to go listen to mark immortell, who embodies the devs, be condescending to you about your death that was caused by the shitty optimization of the game it's just like...fuck the entire way off my dude

my other sort of complaint was about the endings. I generally prefer the nocturnal ending, but I've done both and it felt kind of lame that there wasn't a middle ground ending. not because I wanted a perfect happy ending or anything like that, but because the conflict that was set up between the kin and the townsfolk mirrors a lot of real stuff in the world and it felt very lazy and unimaginative to be like well you can only ever have one or the other there's no other choice! it felt like it kind of negated some of the themes in the story too.

I've complained a lot in this post but I swear I really did enjoy it a lot and I'll probably play the other two parts if they ever come out (not on console though lol). I'd recommended it if you enjoy very challenging games with immersive narratives and high stakes and love the creepy surreal aesthetic. Also there is absolutely nothing wrong with turning down the difficulty sliders and just enjoying the story with the minimum amount of annoyance because it's (intentionally) hard to experience the full story on the intended difficulty, something I have opinions about that you can probably guess

I also enjoyed the marble nest, the dlc that went with it. it had more of the meta game stuff in it but I found it more tolerable and it was just a cool little game with those same great aesthetics

as a final note, I've seen very mixed opinions on the portrayal of the indigenous people of the steppe, the kin (who I don't believe are based on a real people but I won't swear to that), and I don't feel qualified to sort through that myself especially with only a couple vague tumblr text posts to go off of but I do think it's worth noting that there are some criticisms there and keeping that in mind while playing

#mp #asks #not putting this is the main tag because I do not need any crazed fans telling me to git gud or whatever #I did play it on both the intended and an easier difficulty both #and the easier one was more enjoyable to be #listen guys I'm a big soulsborne fan and I'm proud of having beaten them all and if they put in an easy mode I wouldn't play it #BUT I 100% support them putting one in #get over yourself and let people have fun in the way that suits them best #on this blog we love and support everyone who plays games on easy mode #thank you for coming to my ted talk #lol my tldr review could be summed up as loved the game hated the devs

[intoafandom]

Why I like Kevan Miller, Steven Kampfer, Trent Frederic, Torey Krug, Tuukka Rask etc and why I will continue to like them.

(Sorry this is soooo long but it’s the only way I can explain)

So last night I got an anon ask and the person was asking why I like Kevan Miller when he’s a republican and I mentioned how I would make a separate post explaining my reasoning better and now that I have the time and its no longer 3 am, now seems like a good time lol.

So I’m gunna give a backstory about the players above that I mentioned and why a lot of bruinsblr doesn’t like them (so people that may not be aware know the context of why people are upset/dont like them). Most of bruinsblr doesn’t like Miller or Kampfer because they’re republicans. Everyone on bruinsblr is allowed to dislike them if they choose to. I recognize I’m in the minority on this app when I say I like and support Kevan Miller and Steven Kampfer. People on here also don’t like Torey Krug for the same reason and because he follows/followed Trump’s twitter account (since trumps account got deleted, torey now follows the “trump archives” account). People on here don’t like Tuukka anymore because over the summer, during all the blm stuff in the bubble, Tuukka went on tv in the bubble for an interview with a hat that said “Boston police” on it (the interview also aired right after the Bruins Organization posted about how they stand against racism, so people ended up calling Tuukka a racist hypocrite.) Last night, people on here found out that Trent Frederic follows Trump supporters and republicans on social media, which is why he’s losing some fans on this app. There are probably more stories about other players that I’m not aware of as well but these will be the ones I’m focusing on for now.

I am NOT going to start talking about my political opinions or my position on social issues. My account is called IntoAFandom for a REASON. So I can escape the real world and go “into a fandom” and have some peace. That’s why i never reblog or like or post about any real world events or issues. I want my blog to be solely about things, fandoms, and people that I love and care about. I don’t wanna come on my blog and see how a bombing happened or if someone got shot or this president signed this executive order etc etc. i wanna come on my blog and fangirl about Bucky Barnes being a sweetheart with kids or how amazing Matt Grzelcyk is at “tight turns” etc etc. Hence the name “IntoAFandom.”

I’m getting a lot of questions as to why I still support these players and I’ll definitely answer those questions in this post. Just so my mutuals know where I stand on this.

Now obviously it would be super easy for me to just go “well the player is super nice so i dont care about their political views.” And while that’s partially true for me, its not the only reason. For me, the reason is much deeper than that. I’ve never mentioned or talked about or even said it out loud. I touched upon what I’m about to say in that anon ask I got last night, but I’m going to go into detail now. It’s kind of hard to explain and the only way I can describe it is to tell you about my hockey journey up until this point, and specifically the 2018-19 season.

So one day in April in 2018, I was on school vacation and I was very bored. There was literally nothing on tv. However, as I was scrolling through the channels, I saw that a bruins game was on. I had never really watched hockey before in my life and the only experience I could remember having with it was when my mom was obsessed with them in like 2013 and how she set up this whole contraption to try and watch a game when a snowstorm made us lose connection. So with nothing else on the tv, crippling boredom, and being a Massachusetts native, I put the game on. It was literally just starting and the national anthem was about to start. We were playing the leafs lmao and it was game five or six of the series probably. I cant really remember because I didn’t think I would care this much about hockey at the time of watching it. But what I do remember was how CREEPY Tuukka looked😂 He was just standing there alone with a huge spotlight on him, head down, wearing these huge pads and looking straight up terrifying. I literally started laughing because of how creepy he looked. And then he put his cool ass mask on and right there I knew he was my favorite player. And to this day he is still my favorite. Tuukka was the first hockey player I EVER knew and could remember by name. I gotta admit, at first I thought his name was “Tuuk Arask” because that’s what it sounded like whenever the announcers would say it, specifically Jack Edwards lol. But then I was like “wait is it Arask or Rask” and after looking at his jersey like 3 games later I finally realized it was actually Rask lol. And I was like “Tuukka Rask. So freaking creepy lol. He’s my favorite.” I also have to mention that I’ve always been a sucker for people that play positions that no one else wants to play. Like for example, when I first started watching football in like 2014, my first ever favorite player was Stephen Gostkowski because he was the kicker. He was super good and he was instantly my fav. That’s what Tuukka was like for me. This huge, tall ass, creepy ass, goalie who was playing super well. How could i NOT like him. I didn’t really bother to learn any other players on the bruins team since they got eliminated in the second round. I remember saying to my mom “I don’t want them to be out. I wanna learn more.” I wanted to know more about the game and 6 games, or however many it was, wasn’t enough. So for some reason, I followed them throughout the offseason and in late September/early October I started watching a ton of their older games on YouTube. Not super old obviously, but games from like 2013-2017 ish. Just whatever I could find. And it was so interesting. I tried to only watch games where they actually won so I wasn’t wasting my time lol, but not having to worry about the score helped me start learning the game and some of the rules, like what an icing was for example. So then preseason games started and I got more into it. And then the beginning of the 2018-19 season started. I still didn’t really know any players besides Tuukka, even though I was watching YouTube games. The YouTube ones were more for me to learn the game and the rules rather than players (however, looking back, I did notice that Kevan Miller was a freaking beast, but I just didn’t acknowledge who he actually was. I just saw a player going absolute sicko mode and being like YEEEEAAAAH). The second player I could actually remember by name was Danton Heinen. I noticed he was playing really well and I was like omg who is that and I learned his name and he became one of my favorites with Tuukka. Next was Anders Bjork. I remember I was texting my friends and was trying to make it seem like I wasn’t a complete amateur at hockey knowledge, so I was like “hey guys, Bjork is back in the line up😃” and so I always remembered his name. Next was Ryan Donato because he was literally AWAYS smiling. Every time he was on camera he was SMILING. I loved it so much he was like a little bean. And so he was one of my favorites and i had a top three with him, heino and tuuks.

Now I was watching games and slowly learning important names like Chara, Bergeron, Marchand etc but it wasn’t really on my radar to actually learn all the players because I hadn’t even done that with the patriots who I had been watching and loving for yeeeears. But that was until I decided to watch a behind the b episode. And I was HOOKED. I instantly began to love and care about every single player on the roster. This was in like February of 2019. And that’s when I started trying to name everyone on the team, including their numbers. I made it a mission. I remember writing out lists in math class because I was so bored and would rather try to memorize hockey players. And that’s when I found bruinsblr. It was march by the time I started to post hockey stuff. And i made an instagram account so I could started editing them. I’ve had this blog since 2014 and its seen many phases, but march of 2019 was when I changed it into a mainly bruins blog. And I remember not knowing what “bruins lb” was and i never wanted to tag it because I thought it was like a club or something that I would be intruding on😂 So I started posting and reblogging bruins stuff and posting sucky bruins edits on here and on my insta account. And I started watching every single behind the b episode from every season and I was literally obsessed with the team. And then Donato got traded and i was heartbroken cuz I loved him and I was like Coyle is gunna have to wow me to get me to like him and he DID and i LOVE HIM. But then I decided to have a top five instead of a top three. And it was Tuukka, Krug, DeBrusk, Pasta, and Marchy. They were the players I noticed the most. And Marchy started LICKING people how could i not choose him😂 So then the playoffs come and we beat the leafs in game 7 AGAIN (and I literally missed the first two periods because I was at my confirmation) But I finally understood all the memes about the leafs and I finally understood hockey and hockey culture by this point. I knew the rules, the players, the memes, literally everything. And then we make it to the finals and get lil nas x singing old town road before game 1 and we get JD wearing that stupid hat😂 and the two people from The Office (one of them wanted the bruins to win and the other wanted the blues) and it was all just amazing for me. Then we lost and i was devastated. And we had to see pictures of CMac sobbing on the ice and JD sitting alone in his stall crying and all of them were so sad and after that journey we just went through i was fvcking crying too. We didn’t win, but that 2018-19 season is SO special for me.

The people on this roster (minus gemel smith and lee stempniak) are EXTREMELY special to me. They TAUGHT me hockey. They turned me on to an entirely new culture. I got to experience my first real bit of hockey. I got to experience EVERYTHING about hockey with them (besides the cup) in this ONE season of hockey. I saw the preseason games in china, the halloween visit to to the hospital, Chara bringing pies to the homeless, them buying toys for kids in the hospital at Christmas then visiting them, the new years game outside against the hawks, trade deadline crushing my heart, every round of the playoffs, players pushing through crazy injuries, loving players, despising other teams, all the memes, all the jokes, all the players. Everything. The 2018-19 season is SO incredibly special for me because it’s the first time I ever experienced real hockey and watched an entire season. The people on that roster mean so much to me because of that. Now take a look at the names on that roster. Rask. Krug. Miller. Kampfer. Frederic. They all helped me experience my first year of hockey. Freddy in his first freaking game, getting into a fight😂 Miller and Kampfer were BEASTS on the ice. Krug being a SPECTACULAR little defenseman, quarterbacking the pp and sticking up for himself and SLAMMING thomas. Tuukka Rask being the brick wall. There is no way that I could ever dislike the people on that roster unless the did something suuuuuper bad. I don’t know if you would call it hero worship or whatever, but those people on that roster are so fucking special to me. Even ones like JFK and Vaak and Colby that didn’t play that many games. They still made an impact for me as a hockey fan. THAT is the main reason why I will never stop liking and supporting tuuks, krugger, kampfs, millsy, or freddy. Everyone on that roster has a special place in my heart and I’m not going to let their political views change or tamper with the incredible experience they gave me during that 2018-19 season. I wont ever love another team as much as I loved that specific roster. And no one is going to change that for me. I dont care about their political views or whatever. For me, the experience and the feelings they gave me trump anything i may or may not disagree with. That roster is so special to me, I cant bring myself to dislike any of those people. I will always like those players, no matter how republican or democrat or whatever. Political views dont matter to me when it comes to those players.

Now besides all of that and the experience they gave me, I do believe that they’re still good people even tho they may be republican. I wanna start with Tuukka because it literally doesn’t make sense to me. Tuukka is not even AMERICAN. I dont think he cares that much about American politics since im pretty sure most his family lives in Finland. People got mad at him for wearing a Boston police hat. But I think those people are forgetting that Tuukka has been in boston for soooo long. There have probably been multiple occasions where the police had to help him or the team for some reason or another (they are technically famous after all). Tuukka wearing a hat that says Boston Police doesn’t make him a bad person. He was probably just showing support to the people that helped support HIM as well as his family and teammates. I follow Tuukka on insta and he literally NEVER posts anything political. Probably because NEVER actually posts ANYTHING at all lol. Tuukka had been my favorite from the start and theres almost nothing he could ever do that would make me dislike him.

As for the other 4, and any other players on the team that may be republican (honestly i bet most of them are because 1) most hockey players are and 2) a lot of the guys are christian/catholic and most christian/catholic people are republican as well) I choose to believe that political opinions dont make you a bad person. I like to believe that it depends on the circumstances for every individual. Now I’m not gay or black or anything. Im an 18 year old, straight white girl. So obviously i dont know what its really like for someone to hate or disagree with my race, sexuality, etc. I saw someone say (sorry I forget who it was) that they keep thinking “well what would that player say about me because im gay. What would they actually think about me. I cant support them.” And honestly that’s extremely valid. I never thought about it that way before. So if Kevan Miller for example was out here posting a bunch of homophobic stuff like “i hate gays” or “gays are all stupid” or anything like that, then yeah my opinions on him would probably change in some way. But I follow him on insta and i know the stuff he post about. I have NEVER seen him say anything like that. Ive never heard any bruin say anything like that. From what I’ve seen, they all seem like super nice, sweet, supportive people when they’re off the ice. (I think it’s also important to mention that I follow EVERYONE on the 2018-19 roster. I follow all of their instas. Most of them dont have twitter, but I follow all the ones that do. It’s part of the whole “that roster is incredibly special to me” thing). I choose to believe that following republicans or being one yourself doesn’t automatically make you a bad person, especially when you consider the different circumstances that every individual is under as humans. We all experience different things and that always plays a role in how you act or the opinions you have or the people you support. Someone’s political opinions have never stopped me from liking people. Ive clearly shown that I don’t mind republicans at all, but that doesn’t mean im going to dislike democrats either. Most of the actors/ singers that i like are democrats. And it just happens that most of the athletes i like are republicans. The political stuff doesn’t matter to me. I just dont want it being slapped in my face 24/7. I dont care if you’re a republican or democrat as long as you aren’t constantly talking to me about politics or social issues or trying to change my mind on stuff. Hopefully you can try to see my point of view on this and UNDERSTAND why I like them. Again, I’ve never told my hockey story to anyone so please don’t try and invalid my feelings about the season or the players.

Please, I beg, please don’t comment on this calling racist or something. Please dont try and change me mind. Please dont tell me i need to educate myself. I know WHY i like these players. I know where they stand politically and who they support. But these players are too special to ME for me to actually give a sht about if they like trump or not. Honestly tho, feel free to give your opinion (especially if you’re gay or black or anything) cuz i dont mind hearing other standpoints as long as you aren’t mean about it or try to change my mind. If i change my mind, which i probably wont, I want it to be on my own terms. Please remember that we ARE still a hockey family 💛🖤💛

(Also I’m NEVER talking about this again. If anyone ever asks or something like this comes up again im just gunna link/ reblog this post)

(Also, thank you to whoever made it this far and actually read all of that. ESPECIALLY if you’re someone that doesn’t agree with me. Its good to hear multiple standpoints on this stuff.)

#boston bruins #bruins #torey krug #brad marchand #tuukka rask #jake debrusk #charlie mcavoy #patrice bergeron #zdeno chara #matt grzelcyk #kevan miller #steven kampfer #trent frederic

[mittensmorgul]

The Tumblr Beta Version: an objective analysis

I was tempted to just type “it sucks.” And while that is an objective analysis, it’s not exactly helpful. I’ve sent several requests to @staff and @support to restore my account to the old tumblr dashboard format, and received the same automated reply twice now. I’ll copy/paste it here so everyone is on the same page:

(lol, I had to go back and edit this, because apparently the beta version doesn’t display block quotes on the dash. So I’ve also put the block quotes in italics... hopefully it’ll display properly... note after editing: nope, it doesn’t display italics either... how the heck am I supposed to differentiate quoted text? I’ll start each quoted bit with an asterisk, I guess...)

*Thanks for reaching out about the beta dashboard.

*We're currently testing it out, and your account seems to have been selected to take part in the test. Thanks for your patience while we work on it! At this time there is not a way to opt out of testing. You may see your Tumblr experience return to normal as we continue testing.

WE CAN ONLY HOPE.

*In the meantime, check out some of the new features available only in the beta dashboard:

OKAY TUMBLR, IF YOU INSIST, though I would MUCH rather have back all the functionality I personally invested into this website through xkit... you know... making the site ACTUALLY FUNCTIONAL. Let’s see what this beta version has given me instead of functionality:

*Change Palettes: Go to the person icon, then click "Change Palette." You'll find the classic Tumblr blue, dark mode, and a few other color palettes for your dash.

So I tried out all the color palettes. In addition to the ones mentioned here, there’s one that’s trying to look like a green screen terminal that gives me flashbacks to the early 80′s. There’s a reason we stopped using green screen terminals... Another one is “canary yellow.” It’s very yellow. The “classic tumblr” isn’t actually classic tumblr... all the post boxes are dark blue with grey type, not white with black type. And all the other colors are the insanely bright fluorescent of the new Dark Blue standard tumblr scheme. Which means links are practically invisible unless I highlight them. It’s migraine inducing. The one theme with a light colored background is called “Concrete” or “Cement” or something like that and even that only works for about half an hour before the migraine aura really kicks in. I just want my Old Blue via xkit back. You know, what tumblr actually used to look like. I don’t want any of these horrible color palettes. None of them work for me.

*The new "meatballs" menu: This is where you can copy the post link, unfollow the Tumblr who made or reblogged the post, or report a violation to our Community Guidelines.

I could do all of this from the user menus with xkit, too. I don’t regularly report violations or have the urge to block people I have chosen to follow. Why on earth would I want to do any of this? And why would I want these features located directly beside the post link copy feature? 

You know what I do miss? I miss the xkit timestamps feature. I didn’t have to hover dangerously close to the KILL IT WITH FIRE meatballs menu in order to see when a post was made, and in this era of disinformation and misinformation spreading around this site faster than Covid-19, being able to see when a post was ORIGINALLY created is a far more useful feature than an easier way to block people. For reference: I currently have three blogs blocked. Two of them are pornbots. One is a nazi. If I don’t want someone’s content on my dash, I don’t follow them. This “feature” is entirely useless to me.

*A quick note: Pagination is not supported in this beta test, but we're collecting feedback to send to our engineers.

THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST. This beta test might actually be tolerable if I wasn’t trapped into endless scrolling. If I could page through my dash, refreshing it every ten posts or so. You know why? Because once I scroll about 30 posts down my dash, tumblr starts overheating my laptop under the load of ALL THOSE POSTS. Things start malfunctioning-- it takes longer and longer to load new posts the farther I scroll. And the keyboard navigation (both page down and hitting J to advance to the next post, and even just using the down arrow to scroll as I read a long post) freeze and stop functioning. One of my laptop fans has actually begun to malfunction.

You know why this wasn’t a problem on the old version? If the data load got to heavy, I could open a post in a new tab, click view on dash with xkit, and voila! Brand new tab! I could close the malfunctioning tab and everything would be refreshed to normal! But without pagination, THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE.

Also, after reblogging a few posts, the beta version of this site breaks, and doesn’t open a post tab to add commentary or even tags. It just... reblogs the untagged post with no warning whatsoever. You know... that’s really really not cool. I tag EVERYTHING. Well, almost everything. The tags are the only way to keep track of the 40k+ posts on my blog. And warn people that I am posting potential spoilers, or other specific content. It’s REALLY inconvenient to have to either immediately go to my blog to edit the post and add tags, or even comments. The alternative is to scroll up to open individual posts I want to reblog in a new tab, and then reblog directly there. Ironically enough, THOSE pages actually open with xkit installed, and everything (surprise!) functions perfectly there.

It’s perfectly reasonable to understand why this specific issue has limited the number of posts I reblog. Reblogging content should not be this much of a hassle. Creators have been complaining for a while that reblogs have drastically slowed down, and I think making it even more annoying and difficult to reblog posts will not help this problem.

Also, with xkit enabled, there’s a function that auto-loads images as you scroll, so the images are always visible BEFORE they appear on screen. I don’t have to look at the colored boxes and wonder if this is a post I’ve already seen or something I should sit and wait for. Don’t even think about watching tumblr videos. Loading priority is given to the ads that you cannot pause or dismiss, so that video loads and plays in choppy two second bursts instead of being given priority. Since that’s the content I am actually here to consume, it kinda makes me want to do the opposite of patronizing anyone who advertises here with graphically intense ads. And then when you scroll away, with xkit, gifs and videos you’ve scrolled past STOP loading and playing, which I think might be contributing to the intensity of the resource hogging that’s literally melting down my laptop.

And for reference, I have a pretty decent little gaming laptop. A blogging platform shouldn’t be driving it to the brink of frying itself. I didn’t realize just how much xkit worked to streamline this and provide basic functionality to this site.

*And lastly, if you're an XKit user, know that the XKit team is working hard to update things on their end to make it compatible with the beta dashboard.

And this doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of what I’ve lost without xkit. And this is a really REALLY garbage response to user complaints. “Oh, yeah, sorry we made our site suck even worse, but those nice people who do our jobs for free will surely fix our garbage soon!”

Dear wonderful people at @new-xkit-extension, I love you, and I miss you, and while I wish xkit worked with this beta version I’ve been forced into living with, I truly feel for y’all who are trying to deal with this nonsense on behalf of all of us.

And to the folks at Tumblr... maybe try to just... make your site actually more like xkit. You know, actually functional. None of these special new features are useful or functional to me. I respectfully request for a fourth time to be removed from this inane beta test.

Give us OPTIONS. Let us display ALL THE TAGS without having to click a button. Let me have back my Activity+ that actually allowed me to interact with people from my dash! That showed me real-time inline notifications in a way that I could reply to with a single click! Bring me back to my column of open messaging conversation icons so I have easy access to the people I talk with throughout the day instead of closing them all every time I refresh the page. I already feel socially isolated in freaking quarantine, please stop shutting off all my avenues of communication!

Let us have pagination! I mean, maybe it wasn’t the best idea to force heavy users of this site into a beta version that doesn’t allow us to opt out until your engineers had actually figured out how to make it work in a very basic way.

*Let me know if there's anything else I can help you with!

YES. PLEASE REMOVE ME FROM THIS BETA TEST NOW. I have let you know exactly what I want from this site. I just want it to ACTUALLY WORK. For someone who spends 12+ hours a day on this site, this beta test version is NONFUNCTIONAL. PLEASE ALLOW ME TO OPT OUT. I AM LITERALLY BEGGING YOU. I WILL ACTUALLY PAY YOU CASH MONEY TO ALLOW ME TO OPT OUT OF THIS AND GO BACK TO HAVING A FUNCTIONAL BLOG AGAIN. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!

PLEASE! 

I AM OFFICIALLY AT THE END OF MY PATIENCE FOR ENDURING THIS NIGHTMARE.

(one final quick note... I’ve only been back on my dash long enough to make the parenthetical edits-- i.e. adding italics that don’t display and then adding the asterisks at the beginning of each section of quoted text, and already my laptop is overheating again. For reference, I originally typed this entire post from within my tumblr inbox page-- which still functions normally with xkit-- and spent over an hour on it. My laptop was fine the entire time. Clearly the issue is this beta version of the website. I will never forgive tumblr if y’all fry my literal only portal to the outside world at this time. PUT ME BACK TO NORMAL NOW. THIS IS ABSOLUTELY INFURIATING AND ENTIRELY UNACCEPTABLE. Thanks)

(oops apparently i lied... when the asterisks and the previous final note failed to display, I thought that seemed suspicious, and realized that I literally needed to refresh my entire dash in order to see edited changes. Funny how xkit enabled me to do that in real time, which is just another bit of functionality I’ve lost with this beta program. Please guys, this is really, really not working for me at all, just put it back.)

#tumblr problems #staff #support #xkit #was this good enough for you? because I am totally done with this if that wasn't completely obvious #please end my suffering

[iplaymatchmaker]

May I request an IkeRev matchup? Likes: Watching and discussing film and television, cats, the beach, period romances, hockey. Dislikes: Most foods (i'm a picky eater), selfish people. Hobbies/Skills: I'm an actress and a pretty good one (if I say so myself), reading tarot, studying astrology, board games, crochet. Passions: Community activism and intersectional feminism. I'm an INTP Ravenclaw and my introversion makes me come off as cold until I open up to you, then I'm v funny and sarcastic!

A/N: Heyo, person behind the blog here, I just wanted to apologize for being so absent, and arguably very slow with asks (what’s new here), life is super busy and it has sort of killed my motivation to write. I’ll try to finish the next few faster, so bear with me.😅

I match you with

Ray!

Thanks a bunch for your patience, sorry this is so late but I hope you enjoy it! Thanks for requesting🥰 ! This was honestly such a blast to write and helped relieve some stress, so thanks.❤

Before the two of you grew closer, Ray was just the intimidating leader of the black army. It’s an understatement to say that you are surprised when you find him sandwiched between a chunk of the cats you frequently feed. You stay silent for a few minutes, endeared by the sight of the King of Spades playing with street cats.

When he notices you, his laid back smile is replaced by confusion. He doesn’t’ seem convinced when you tell him you were bringing food to the cats, but the bag you are carrying is enough evidence to support your claim.

Despite your rocky start, the two of you end up meeting on occasion at the same alley, either by coincidence or fate. Since you already learned his secret, the two of you often spend time together, usually at night when he’s off duty. It serves as a break from the routine, a space where you could forget about your problems outside of that moment.

The peace is disturbed when you are attacked by a group of bandits, looking for some easy cash. You had never had a similar incident happen before, but looking at the dimly lit alley around you, you realized standing alone wasn’t the best idea. You were planning your escape when Ray appeared out of seemingly nowhere, knocking down the two men in a swift movement. The event served as the catalyst for the shift in your relationship, moving towards something deeper than idle friendship.

Soon you start meeting outside of the confined space of the alley, on his days off, slowly getting to know each other on a more significant level.

The first time he sees you crocheting, waiting for him at the small café in Central Quarter, he is convinced you’re working magic. Despite your attempts to explain it to him, his hands seem to only be good for gripping the sword. Even so, he seems to grow a habit of watching you do it, claiming it’s relaxing when it’s you doing it.

 Prompt: Date

 Standing in the middle of an ongoing fight, you began questioning how it always ended up so messy with him.

You had been eating dinner at Black Army Headquarters, making idle conversation with Seth when the topic of Ray came up.

“How are things between you?” it shouldn’t have been a hard question. You both loved spending time together and you felt like you were growing more and more comfortable with each other. Still, something held you back from a quick reply.

“Oh no! What did that brute do?” a face of horror only Seth could master fell over his face.

“It’s nothing…” you were going to change the topic, but the man had never been on to leave a lady in distress without advice.

“When someone says it’s nothing, it’s usually something bad.”

“Is that so?” you smirked, hoping to lighten the mood but he didn’t seem ready to move on. You sighed, knowing full well how considerate everyone in the black army was. Perhaps it would be good to talk someone.

“It’s silly really. I just… I feel like I’ve been seeing him less and less. He’s always busy with one thing or the other these days. He’s been working his days off as well so…” your voice trailed off when you realized you had been rambling.

“I see, I see. Not to worry, big sister Seth is here to save the day. Leave it to me  <3. “  you weren’t sure what he was planning but you were glad to see him chipper again.

  It was shortly after waking up the next morning that you realized what he had been plotting.

Ray was hovering around the door when you got up, confusion written all over his face.

“Rethinking your will?” you wrapped your hands around him to peak at the letter he was holding.

“What?” his eyes were still drowsy after a long night or reading reports and you couldn’t help but tease him a little.

“What’s so interesting about a piece of paper? Don’t you have a stack of those fighting for your attention on your desk?” your tone was playful but you were still disappointed at your own words, knowing you wouldn’t see him again until dinner.

“Seems like those will have to wait.” He finally cracked a smile and turned to you, handing you the small piece of paper.

Dear Ray,

       This is a letter signed by all thirteen officers of the Black Army. With this letter, we order you to take a day off as compensation for working on your breaks. Consider this your punishment. We better not see you working, or we will be forced to double your punishment to two days off. Your duty today is to have fun and spend time with your girlfriend.

            -With Love,

The black army officers <3.

  You mentally slapped Seth in the face.

“I didn’t know this was what he had in mind.” You run a hand through your hair, still messy from sleeping in.

“Did he tell you about this?” you were expecting Ray to be upset at the turn of events, but he still wore his laid back smile, giving you hope that this could turn in your favor.

“It’s nothing. I just saw something in the stars.” You pecked his lips, arms wrapping around his neck to bring him closer. The close contact made you realize how long it had been since you had been alone.

“I see. Well, considering they went through all the trouble of grounding me, we might as well make the most of it.” His arms tightened around you as he closed the distance between you. You started appreciating Seth’s gesture after all.

After a late breakfast you packed up, ready to spend his first break in a while on the beach. You couldn’t keep the smile from your face as you walked through the woods, a comfortable silence falling between the two of you.

Despite your bright mood, something in your mind was still worried that Ray’s smile was forced. You had seen how hard he had been working and it was hard to shake the feeling that a day off would only cause more stress. You ultimately decided to keep your worries to yourself, determined to make the day worth his while.

“I love the breeze.” Once the cold air hit your face you felt yourself relax, the sound of the waves hitting the shore playing like music in your ears.

“Come on!” you grabbed Ray’s arm, dragging him to the water, practically skipping over the golden sand.

“Don’t trip!” in the end, it was Ray who fell over, causing you to topple over laughing before helping him up, sand now covering his backside.

After setting up, you made yourself comfortable on one of the chairs, the warm sun of the afternoon pleasant on your skin.

“Care for a swimming contest? First to make it to the hill and back wins.” Ray’s offer came with a confident smile, peaking your competitive curiosity.

“And what do I get if I win?” you rose from your seat, challenging him with your eyes.

“How about one favor? Don’t worry, I’ll be kind.” you both smiled, sparks practically flying between you.

“How romantic.” You placed a light kiss on his lips, preparing for takeoff.

“You’re going down Blackwell.” And with that you were off, sprinting towards the water.

“Cheater.” You could hear Ray behind you, trying to catch up. You were both laughing now, wishing the moment could last forever.

You were panting by the time you got to shore. Despite your best efforts, Ray had arrived a solid minute before you. You could resist splashing him when you made it back.

“Those muscles shouldn’t be allowed in this competition.” You were pouting, but it didn’t matter to you much who won, as long as you could spend more days without worries.

“So you don’t like my build?” his pouting wasn’t very convincing but he had the spirit. You wrapped you arms around him, your faces inches apart.

“I never said that.” Before you could prove your point, you heard a scream coming from further down the shore.

“Help me!” Ray quickly entered solider mode, searching for the source of the screams.

“That woman!” you pointed to a woman visibly fighting to free herself from the grasp of three men. You stayed behind Ray as you approached the group.

“Leave her alone.” Ray’s voice was cold as ice, a complete contrast to his previous demeanor.

“And who are you?” one of the men spoke up, perhaps the leader of the group.

“The king of spades. I could probably take you all with ease, so you should probably let her go now.” The men laughed. Two of them came forward, the third keeping a firm grip on the woman.

“Let’s see what you’ve got, King.” His voice was dripping with irony. Ray cracked his knuckles once before making his first move. Showoff . The grins were quickly wiped from the men’s faces as the fell on the sand without much trouble. The third man tried to run but you were already behind him, a kick in his groin enough to loosen his grip, allowing the woman to slip away. She silently thanked you before taking off, wanting to get away from the fighting. You only then realized that you were now standing between Ray and the leader of the group, the other two men still groaning on the ground.  Standing in the middle of an ongoing fight, you began questioning how it always ended up so messy with him.

“Don’t worry, this’ll be over soon.” Ray flashed you a confident smile before launching himself at the lowlife. You pushed yourself out of the way, giving him some room to throw him on the ground, finally immobilizing him.

“See. My muscles are good for something after all.” He was smiling, but the fighting seemed to have taken a toll on him, considering he had been swimming right before this happened. A sudden feeling of guilt took over you.

After the men were carried off by the soldiers patrolling the area, you and Ray decided to rest a little before going home. You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything, still shaken by what had happened.

“Say it.”Ray finally broke the silence.

“What?”  

“You’re a good actress, but I know you well enough to know when something’s bothering you.” he turned to you, posture still relaxed despite the events of the day. You knew lying wouldn’t get through to him so you decided to be honest, considering keeping things was what got you in this situation to begin with.

“It was me who gave Seth the idea to give you a break. I just felt like I haven’t really seen you in a while…” Ray reached out, one hand wrapping around your shoulders.

“That was probably irresponsible. You have a duty after all.” You tried to smile, but you knew it was strained.

“I missed you.” His words were simple but they touched you all the same.

“Sure, I’ve been busy. I have a duty to protect these people.” You looked back at the sea, wondering when the two of you would be able to come again.

“But I also have a duty to you. I fancy myself to be a top tier boyfriend after all.” He cupped your face, looking straight into your eyes.

“Let’s do this more often.” You smiled, feeling like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders.

“All right. Next time, try not to get into fights. It’s not very top tier boyfriend of you.” He laughed, kissing you like you were the most important thing in his life.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

#ikemen revolution #ikerev matchup #ikerev ray

[maxismatchccworld]

Hey you lovely Simmers! It is time for our new Spotlight of the Month. Please give a warm welcome to MLys aka @mlyssimblr​. 😊

Hello!

I’m MLys, I’m a 27 years old French simmer and I’ve been sharing maxis match custom content for The Sims 4 for three years.

I’ve discovered the game with The Sims 1 back when I was 9 and I immediately fell in love. I still remember when I’ve unwrapped the base game and Vacation EP at Christmas! Thereafter, I’ve been a huge Sims 2 player (gameplay wise it’s still my favorite of the franchise), skipped The Sims 3, and out of curiosity and nostalgia, came back to the game with The Sims 4 without a lot of expectations. I just wanted to play time to time in my corner, mostly as a builder, and didn’t have any intention to start a blog and create CC.

The need of creating my own custom content quickly came up because I felt frustrated to not find the items I needed to design my builds the way I imagined them. I already downloaded CC as a kid, and was sooo obsessed about it back then! I ingeniously wished I could be able to do the same and run my own sims download website, but it wasn’t easy to find proper tutorials in French (and I most likely wasn’t mature and skilled enough ahah) so I had no idea how all those things worked. I just accepted that it was some computer magic. Several years and more experience later, that sweet memory contributed to make me want to give it a try and take my revenge!

Into the Simverse!

Pic: Exhibition set (Part 1)

My Exhibition set, specially made for the museum I was building, was the first CC I completed and shared on my blog. The set was very simple, but it was already foreshadowing what I would particularly love to do ever since: trying to expand the lore of the Simverse! As it can be deduced from this set, I was very inspired by the creative @femmeonamission’s Great Art Serie and the principle of only using resources from the game. Simlish fonts weren’t enough, I wanted to embrace the fact that the Sims live in a similar but alternative world to ours, with its own peculiarities and silly historical background.

Pic: Sim’Pop culture Tucked-in Tee

I’ve started to become a build mode catalog and Sims Wiki nerd, trying to collect Sim cultural references from all the games and brainstorm head canons that I could exploit for my builds backstories and CC design. I just need a consistent universe!!

I loved to imagine swatches for my tucked tee, which illustrates that approach pretty well. The TS4 concept artists have created so many cute and creative little gems in the game that need a second life, like the base game paintings and the movies from the Movie Hangout SP.

An other example is of course my baby Pufferhead Stuff, that was initially supposed to be a tiny set inspired by a base game poster, but that ended up being a liiiiittle bit more ambitious, whoops. I spent an outrageous time working on all the details I could think about to make the pack cohesive and refer to Harry Potter without losing the maxis match spirit. I am so so touched when I see simmers considering some elements from Pufferhead as canon in their game! During the process, I genuinely thought that I spent a useless time on things that most simmers would barely pay attention to, such as the Harnock sorting test, so it was really rewarding to discover that people actually appreciated the effort!

(If you like Simverse headcanon CC, my simblr crush @bottsbotts​ had also made a very creative set inspired by base game posters!)

Pic: Pufferhead Stuff Pack

We do love collaborations

The second part of the Exhibition set that I’ve made with @aroundthesims has a very special spot in my heart. I’ve been a big fan of Sandy’s work since day 1, and downloaded everything she did. When I’ve started to share CC, I needed to fangirl in her DM to tell her how she inspired me. It must sound silly, but when she proposed to collaborate, I felt so crazy happy and proud! If mini-MLys playing sims in her bedroom full of dolphin and HP posters had heard about that, her brain would have been like “Can’t… compute…”

Pic: Exhibition set (Part 2) / Screenshot features items by Sandy and me

I can’t introduce myself either without talking about my friends from The @Plumbobteasociety!  They’re the first friends I’ve ever made online and I love them (I’ve even met some irl!). Working on Cottage Garden Stuff with them was a blast. There was a real team spirit and it definitely made me progress. Never I would have been able to work by myself on Pufferhead without the Cottage Garden experience and without their support!

Pic: Cottage Garden Stuff pack / Screenshot features items by @magnolianfarewell @femmeonamissionsims @teanmoon @nolan-sims @litttlecakes @simlaughlove and me

There is something very fulfilling in collaborating with someone that got skills that you don’t have, and managing together to create something cool. I had that feeling with those projects, but also with the talented @illogicalsims who accepted to make the render of Pufferhead. It really was out of my current ability and his final render is fully part of the identity of the pack and I’m sure contributed to valorize it, so I can’t thank him enough for that!

Other stuff

“Sorry, I’ve been quite absent recently…”

I update my simblr very irregularly, and my content can be quite random. To be honest I don’t feel like I have produced that much? I really wish I did! I have so much ideas condemned to stay in my notebook forever… RIP. Here are my favorite editing and building projects:

31 years of Simblreen (2017)

The Windenburg Old Town Square

Forever grateful…

…Like for real. I don’t try to be mushy or something. That simblr really helped me at times when I needed it. I definitely have a creative profile, but without a specific goal in mind, I tend to want to do and learn so much things at the same time, that I end up feeling overwhelmed and uninspired, and don’t practice anything. And then I feel frustrated and can’t manage to have a consistent hobby. When I started the blog, I totally underestimated all the various skills it would actually make me work on: 3d modeling, texturing, editing, illustration, storytelling, my English… and even video editing for the Pufferhead trailer! I admit that I haven’t talked about that blog to a lot of my irl friends, because I’m afraid they wouldn’t understand that it’s not “unworthy”. And well, I myself also devalue a lot what I produce in general. I’m working on feeling more confident and share with them all the good memories and touching moments I have from my simming experience! All the adorable support I’ve received here through those last 3 years really really helped for that, and I can’t express how much it means to me <3

Thank you Kerstin for the Spotlight (and aw sorry for the delay) ! Especially for the month of my birthday, such a cute coincidence :)

Thanks for reading, have a great week, and happy simming everyone!

#s4cc #s4mm #ts4cc #ts4mm #maxis match #thesims4 #s4 spotlight #mlyssimblr

[arecomicsevengood]

COMICS BLOGGING OF A RAMBLING AND DIGRESSIVE SORT

I am embarrassed to admit it, but I do believe I buy things as a way of coping with my own uselessness. I’d like to attribute a universality to this character flaw, and claim everyone spends money on things they don’t need to fill some sort of existential void at the center of their being. My habits are relatively healthy, some people get shitfaced in response to the stimuli that makes me simply want meat, cheese, and carbohydrates. I have at various times read books at a pace comparable to eating, where everything got finished to make way for something else, but just because “reading books” is viewed as something good for your brain doesn’t make the act of buying them feel any less like a bit of brainless consumerism, especially when one is broke, and a global depression looms. Still, considering my worries that the postal service and retail outlets might go away if we do not support them and this will make life even more unbearable I convinced myself now was not the time to be a spendthrift.

All this is to explain why I bought a handful of comics I wasn’t sure I even expected to be good. Namely, I bought a bunch of issues of Alan Moore’s Tom Strong that I wasn’t sure whether or not I’d read before. I intended to parcel them out and savor them, but when I buy snacks at the grocery store, they get eaten faster than the vegetables. I bought these, along with some other single issue comics, from wowcool.com. From Powell’s, I preordered the first volume of Taiyo Matsumoto’s Ping Pong, which should arrive in a few weeks. I also ordered a few new releases direct from Fantagraphics.

Most notable among these is the Olivier Schrauwen/Ruppert And Mulot collaboration Portrait Of A Drunk. I’m on record as liking all the artists involved, and this one demonstrates why pretty clearly: While Olivier Schrauwen specializes in comedy about dumb guys, itself a form close to my heart, Ruppert And Mulot are darker and meaner, so here the dumb guy is an indifferent murderer. Being set in a pirate milieu allows for pretty amazing sequences of action and hallucination to flourish, their skills at color and composition tie it all together. Highly recommended. The back of the book announces Fantagraphics will be publishing the Ruppert And Mulot books made in collaboration with Bastien Vives starting next year. Hopefully I will end up reading comics by people other than my known favorites this year, but during a period of belt-tightening, there’s no guarantee even one’s favorites will live up to the increasingly-burdensome expectations put upon them.

Still, those Tom Strong comics outperformed my expectations. I believe I discussed how much I like Chris Sprouse’s work when I wrote about Alan Moore’s Supreme run, but let me reiterate: There’s a handful of comics Sprouse drew in the early nineties (A Batman annual with a Two-Face story written by Andy Helfer, an eighty-page Justice League Quarterly story, the first few issues of Legionnaires) which are emblematic of a certain DC Comics skillset I really value: This George Perez style ability to draw a lot of characters, rendered with this Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez spareness, this Kevin Maguire sense of facial expressions, a certain openness to the faces which is youthful and attractive and optimistic. There’s something similar to Graham Nolan’s art too: I don’t know how much other people like this stuff, it’s not really “cool” or gnarly looking, but there’s an unobtrusive cleanliness I associate with the DC “vibe” of this era, which I find vastly more appealing than the sort of post-Image-studios runoff that was their standard look more recently. As much as I love a good stylist, his is a good house style variant. Considering that, it rules that Tom Strong is what Chris Sprouse is known for. Those early nineties comics all have a lot of panels per page, but Moore, working in a post-Image mode, lets him breathe and do action sequences. He’s not an explosive artist, his drawing has this sort of style-guide quality to it, that feels perfect for the sort of “platonic ideal of a mainstream genre comic” tone that their collaborations aim for.

Reading these comics, I realized a few things: One, I hadn’t actually read them before. Two, they’re twenty years old. The years have been kind to them, in that I spent them aging, and while I was really into Top Ten and Promethea as a teenager, I still suspect that if Tom Strong is your favorite Alan Moore comic you are probably a dad. There’s a heavily nostalgic quality to all the genre pastiche going on, and its anchored by this character who is pretty upstanding, possessing this sort of all-seeing but benevolent competence aspect, and the storytelling affirms his liberal values. Peaceful coexistence is treated as preferable to violent conflict. It’s the work where Moore’e desire to issue a corrective to what he sees as a negative influence he had is most evident, it genuinely seems to be trying to be morally instructive to a young audience. I don’t think any of these things are bad, but it’s pretty easy to see how, reading the issues as they came out, many of them would register as somewhat bland. I seem to recall comic book writers at this time like Warren Ellis, Grant Morrison, and Mark Millar all deriding what they called “dad comics,” not necessarily talking about Tom Strong, as a way of hyping up their own efforts, many of which I followed more avidly at the time but do not expect would hold up nearly as well. (There’s an issue that’s a homage to old Captain Marvel Family comics, featuring a few pages of Kyle Baker art, I particularly enjoyed.)

After being reminded that Moore is a great writer, and never forgetting for a second we live in dark times, it felt appropriate to read From Hell again. I texted a friend and found he had started rereading it at the same time. I don’t consider it Moore’s masterpiece the way that contrarians that don’t want to give the nod to Watchmen do. While the darkness feels organic to the subject matter in a way it often doesn’t in Moore’s eighties superhero work, I do feel the whole “Jack The Ripper gives birth to the twentieth century” thing is a bit of a reach. I believe I will end up reading some of Eddie Campbell’s solo comics before quarantine is over, I am impressed by how organic the pacing feels, how natural it progresses while largely avoiding calling attention to Moore as a writer. The skill set that enables Moore to do a densely researched historical conspiracy thing is evident when he does a genre serial. Many of the elements in Tom Strong do not feel like they are imagined from whole cloth so much as they feel appropriated from various sources and then connected into this larger whole. The “peaceful coexistence” remit of Tom Strong allows for a structure where stories that seems tossed-off come back into play as plot elements. You rarely receive this kind of payoff from extended serials, but it’s built into the structure of screenwriting, and it is satisfying to retroactively realize like you weren’t having your time wasted when you thought you were.

I also ordered from Wowcool the Dunja Jankovic comics Sparkplug put out circa ten years ago. They’re very cool, reminiscent of Anke Feuchtenberger and Gary Panter, slowly shifting their sense of texture over multiple pages, so that while I don’t think I realized at the time these comics were released that they’re very well-drawn, it is obvious when you actually read them. I anxiously await her “Richter’s Game” minicomic being translated into English, though obviously this is going to be a tough year for self-publishers selling zines with widespread show cancellations. My hope is that Fantagraphics’ Now anthology will just start running work by people like Dunja, Alyssa Berg, Nick Norman, and Beatrix Urkowitz, but maybe there are good reasons for that not to occur. Maybe anthology pages can’t compete with the profits one stands to gain from self-publishing, or maybe my own idea of what I consider my broad-minded and catholic tastes would not actually appeal to large sections of the indie comics market, the same way my idea of what I consider “good” in mainstream comics is actually far too nostalgic a model for the aesthetic preferences of the market as it currently stands. I offer these recommendations solely as another way of coping with my powerlessness.

[darkmachinedev]

Dev Blog #2: Frequently Asked Crabs

So I figured I would use this opportunity to answer some questions that are often asked about the game. I’m happy to see people are excited about these cute little crustaceans, as I am excited too!

Q: Is the game purely multiplayer? A: No! While the game is built around it’s multiplayer experiences, a big focus of my development has been into making it fun to play offline, as a solo experience. The PVE mode has been created with that in mind, and there will be plenty of enjoyment to be had playing it without needing other players, or an internet connection.

Q: When will the game be released? A: When it’s ready! There is not set release date yet, so keep an eye out, when things are more set in stone, this blog, the Reddit, or my Twitter (@Futilrevenge) will be the first to let you all know!

Q: What will the price of the game be upon release? A: It’s hard to say this early on, though in my mind it’s around the $10-15 mark. That may change around release, but I want to keep the game affordable.

Q: Will Beta Access be available? A: It’s hard to say at the moment. I have been testing the game with many of those I know in real life, but the move to doing that online is daunting. It won’t be soon, as I want the first somewhat public facing release to be as polished as possible. If there will be some sort of private beta, I’ll announce it here and give people the chance to get into it.

Q: Why is it taking so long? A: I have a job that pays the bills! I would love to work on this full time, believe me, but at the moment financially I can’t afford to do so. But don’t worry! It will come when it’s ready!

Q: Is War is Shell coming to Consoles? Switch? A: I really want it to! I think the game would be super rad on the switch, and would love to get it there, but first I need to take it further before putting that commitment in. If it all works out, than I can guarantee that I will try everything I can to bring it to console.

Q: What Engine is the game using? A: The game is being developed within Unity.

Q: How performance intensive is this game? A: One of my metrics for this game’s performance is if it runs on my crappy potato laptop. It does! So, uh, I can guarantee that at least. I haven’t run it on a system that’s struggled... Yet.

If you have any more questions, reply to this thread where it is posted, or to the thread itself! I want to answer questions during each blog post.

But before I let you all go, here’s a short message from Jack, the man who is creating War is Shell’s whole audio experience.

Jack:  "Hey everyone, I'm Jack (@Diplodocus03). I've been doing the music and sound for the game. I've mostly been holding off on posting stuff relating to that because a lot of it isn't final yet! Having said that, I'm planning on making small segments that are aaaaalllll about making those things final. Everything from crab noises to rockets. Music-wise, that's a slightly different story. I spent years being pretty okay with just uploading chunks of unfinished tracks but even in the last couple months I've made huge changes to what will be in the game. I'm still super into being open about the creative process of so after the game comes out I'll share some demos and talk a bit more about that end. 

 Lastly, I want to cover the topic of voice actors for this game. Right now we don't need additional voices. I've filled in the gaps we've had just because I can record everything at home and process them quick and easy. That being said I'm definitely interested in bringing in more VAs if needed. If the game does particularly well, I'd really like to get support for other languages in the game (fingers crossed). That's it from me, see you around! " 

#war is shell #gamedev #indiedev #crabs #lowres #lowpoly #devblog

[yungfrieda]

10.26.19

also known as - things i’ve learned about myself and the world around me as this year comes to a close. 

first before i get into the #content i just want to say RIP to communities centered around long-form written content!! i really miss tumblr and the community around it, i suppose i could easily go to Reddit or something if i wanted to write long posts about my life but i really liked how everyone’s blog was their own platform to curate and didn’t have to be hyper glossy & filtered imgs of a curated idealistic life. (can you tell i’m not a big fan of instagram?)

ok moving on. this year threw me for a loop. in this one year of 2019 i’ve had 3 different jobs. spent a month just straight up unemployed with nothing to do. tried to break into concert production and kinda fell on my face for circumstances out of my control. this year taught me that if you don’t have a backup plan.... you gotta be quick enough on your feet to come up w one because things can get bad very quickly. 

but i learned so many other things that don’t have to do with survival and disaster planning mode and i’d like to share at least 5 of them.

1. i learned how to really sit down and take an audit of my emotions. this is really all thanks to working with my therapist Emily who i am quite certain i would not still be here without. days are really, really tough sometimes and in moments where i have a lot going on, i tend to shove my emotions and needs into a dark corner of my brain so i can stay productive. 

this is only sustainable for a verrrry short amount of time and the consequences are usually a breakdown. i’ve been telling people that my emotions are like toddlers. toddlers cannot and should not be abandoned for long periods of time and do deserve to have their needs met by the person who is supposed to care for them. and we all know caring for a toddler is a lot of fuckin work. but the results are that the toddler grows up healthy and ends up thanking their parents in the long run. i want to be able to thank myself for taking care of me, so i’ve gotta put in the work. 

2. i’ve learned that a lot of my relationships are not reciprocal. this was a hard one. i find myself soooo frustrated with a lot of my most favorite people because the boundaries that i’ve set in our relationship are either extremely flimsy or non-existent. i’m happy i’m realizing this now because its a sign of growth. I’m beginning to question the structures in my life and the roles people play, wondering what sparks joy like an emotional Marie Kondo. it’s badass, but the hard part comes in when i’ve got to put some action behind these new observations and change things. i’m not super good at this just yet but working with my therapist has really helped me turn my relationship with my boyfriend around so i’m confident i’ll figure it out. 

3. i’ve learned just how shitty lifestyle creep can be. in a way that isn’t really my fault! the one big purchase i’ve made since getting this new job is purchasing a nintendo switch for myself. other than that, i’ve been booked for a month straight for some intensive dental work, booked doctor’s appointments, and have been spending a lot more on transportation due to work. my money has been fucked up since i started making a higher salary, one that i consider “liveable”. i really hope that certain changes will make it easier to adjust and safe, make budgets for the shit i actually want to be spending on, and all around just being smarter with my money.

4. i’ve learned that my career just ain’t gonna get easier. this is another tough one to accept. i’m a person who really likes to be challenged, and unfortunately i’ve found that a bit of those “go-getter” and scrappy characteristics i’ve loved about myself have been damaged because of some uncomfortable work environments. i’m learning how to restore those entrepreneurial values that i had where i’d make a way if i couldn’t easily find one and would be so happy to roll up my sleeves and make shit happen without a second thought. 

BUT what i’m trying to say is, the more i pursue roles that take me out of my comfort zone, challenge me to grow, and give me more responsibility, the harder it’s going to get to find shit like “work/life balance” and days where i can just coast under the radar. those days are long gone, unfortunately (and fortunately!) because there’s a way to mediate the bullshit while i’m making my way to the top. i just have to actively enforce boundaries for balance. i’m saying it like it’s so easy, but i know that’s the key to keeping my sanity while also keeping a challenging job. i’m sure there are days where i’ll have to work extra long hours or put my brain’s petal to the metal, but it can’t be the norm or else i’m going to ultimately set myself up for burnout. 

no matter who is uncomfortable with it, i’ve got to make the space and time to take care of myself - no questions asked. because no one is gonna do it for me. 

5. i’ve been reminded that love is not glossy and glamorous. not that i’ve ever been that type of person anyway. it’s been a long time since Ian and I have been in “sweep you off your feet” mode and that’s ok. i’m more of a “steady-state” type of partner anyway where i can really be supportive on a day-to-day level instead of blowing someone away with grand gestures that can only be done once in a blue moon. but what i want to say with this is that i think a lot of people hope to find their soulmate who will make their life complete, rid them of all of their problems, and then they can ride off into the sunset together.

that’s not how it happens. ian and i will never be that to each other and it’s ok. we make a good couple by way of being super understanding with each other and truly being invested in one-another’s happiness and needs which is something i’m grateful for. he’s really the most reliable person i’ve got in my life and i hope to be the same way for him. but we’ve gotten into some fights every now and again, or have both been cranky on the same day at the same time and been kind of venomous to each other. i learned in those times that it’s easier to unpack someone’s behavior and why his perceptions of priorities like communication are different than mine, instead of just throwing in the towel because we’re just too different. 

in another instance, we just had a weekend where neither of us even touched each other after a few months of not even being face-to-face for awhile and just sat next to eachother all day and night and played video games in our pajamas. i’ll admit, i sometimes fall victim to wanting us to make every moment count and when we’re together just sitting and doing nothing can kind of drive me nuts, but i knew we both needed to rest and it was nice to just pretend to be roommates for a few days. 

while i do like getting cute and spending days together with Ian when we hit the city and do some fun stuff, we just can’t do it all the time. he’s still a college student and i’m a walking dental construction site. we’ve got a lot going on that makes it hard to make every moment we see each other “stellar” but i love that and i love him and i wouldn’t want it any other way.

this post ended up a little longer than i wanted it to so i’ll leave you by saying i’m still sad. i hate the upcoming season so much and the lack of sunlight in the winter makes my brain very sad. but this year was a fruitful one. it’s been a lot of confusion, honestly. lots of things that i’m still a little fuzzy on but just like mentioned above, it’s all about having that plan b and not always about sticking around to pick up the pieces. when ya gotta move on, it’s time to move on.

i’m ready to move into 2020 hoping that all of the things i’ve learned in the past few years will start to pay off. i’ve got to remember and retain this info because it’s valuable and i KNOW i’m gonna need it again. it’s so much easier when you don’t have to re-learn shit because you kept the notes. 

i want to finish off this year strong and go into the next feeling confident.

#personal

[princeoftennis-imagines]

*gasp* another prince of tennis blog :o I have been searching far and wide for you guys cause there's so few of us left ;-; May I please request a match-up? I'm the smol enthusiastic (but lowkey stressed) mom friend who goes kid mode when there's someone more mature around xD I may seem really dumb and just full of memes but I'm actually super smart and can get down to business when I'm super focused. My interests are kind of all over the place; I enjoy playing videogames (1/??)

.. (2/??) (Rpgs, fps, story rich) and I'm also currently making some games as well :D When I find something I enjoy I get super fired up about it but the flame quickly dies out when I get bored so it's hard to focus (that and the smallest obstacle is enough to throw me off hehe) On the other side of the spectrum I like playing around with skincare/makeup/fashion and on the OTHER SIDE I also do martial arts (I did taekwondo but now I'm going into kickboxing)

(3/3) and to chill i sleep a LOT or I listen to music (rnb usually) since i have all these hobbies I tend to overwork myself and neglect my well-being and I also prioritize everyone over me which doesn't help haha xD I'm a bit oblivious to people having s crush on me but when I have a crush on someone it dies with me in the grave but all in all i'm a lowkey tsundere who wants to be hyped and babied and wants to baby their s/o in return :3 Thank you so much in advance for having this blog ♡

yay! my first match up request. please enjoy! ❤️

- - - - - - *

I see you with Akaya Kirihara.

You two would first meet up in an arcade afterschool. You’d be playing a game on one of the machines, trying your best to beat the high score listed. Eventually, you had done so and jumped off your chair in excitement. You saw how the first place name, ‘Akaya Kirihara’ moved to the second. “I finally beat you, Mr. Kirihara. It was easy pea-“

“You what..?!” You turned around to see a boy with messy hair staring at you with a shocked expression. “Excuse me?” You said, raising a brow. “No way, you didn’t beat me! I didn’t work hard for nothing!” He looked at the scoreboard, letting out a groan and pouting at you. “How did you beat me so easily? It too me weeks to get that score!” You laughed and stared at him with curiosity. “I could teach you a few tricks if you’d like, only because you seem so serious about it.” He grinned and nodded, watching as you explained things detail by detail.

About an hour later, you two were standing in front of each other, bidding your goodbyes. “Thanks Kirihara-kun, I had a fun time today. Hopefully we can hang out again.” His face lit up in happiness, a small blush spreading across his cheeks. “O-Of course! I’ll see you at school!” You had stuck to his mind for the rest of the day, distracting his thoughts elsewhere. After a few months of talking, he would ask you out shyly.

Kirihara is definitely fascinated by the fact that you play and create video games yourself, and would try his best to help you out with ideas and such. You two for sure would be up all night just challenging each other in games. Since he’s a little bad at work, god knows that when he needs help, he’d come to you for assistance shyly as you rolled your eyes and laughed. He loves that you’re just as energetic as him, which meant that you two shared the same energy. He loves that he can share the same personality with someone else who can relate on a daily basis.

For your beauty side, he doesn’t really understand why you need makeup. He thinks you’re amazing the way you are, but will support you in any decision you make. He would gladly participate in this side of you, often doing face masks with you or helping you pick outfits for the day. He is absolutely terrified that you can do martial arts, but brags about it anyway to his teammates, showing how cool his s/o is. Let’s admit it, he’d probably come to you for help if someone was bothering him.

He doesn’t like the fact you neglect yourself and will try his best to make sure you avoid doing that. He will definitely take care of you if you unintentionally neglect yourself. Kirihara loves that you’re a lowkey tsundere, thinking that it’s cute and would baby you till the end of his days. You’d do the exact same thing since he’s somewhat clingy and will whine if he doesn’t get attentions. At the end of the day, you two would just cuddle up and sleep the night away without a worry.

#match up #prince of tennis #princeoftennis #prince of tennis matchup #kirihara akaya #tenipuri

[unnoticedgenius]

Eevee the Gamer: Celeste

(CONTAINS SPOILERS.  Just so you know.)

I’m back!

Yes, I know it’s been a while.  Yes, I know I should update more regularly.  But I’m afraid life has kept me quite busy.

However, in that time, I thought of a great side section of this blog where I can work on reviewing games I think need more attention, which I’ve decided to call Eevee the Gamer!  (I’m super subtle, right? ;)

For today’s Eevee the Gamer I’ve chosen to review the videogame Celeste, which is one of the most difficult and rewarding games I think I’ve ever played.  I’ll link the creator’s website below so you can investigate further on your own, but for those who don’t know, Celeste is available on a number of platforms, including Nintendo Switch, XboxOne, Playstation 4, and Steam.

The basic plot of the game (summed up Reader’s Digest style) is that the main character, Madeline, climbs the mountain Celeste and along the way makes friends, enemies, and discoveries about the mountain’s incredible powers and her own mind.

What makes this game unique is that Celeste is not simply a game where you climb up a mountain.  Celeste is a game which brings you into the mind of someone who struggles with a mental illness; Madeline, as is revealed throughout the game, struggles with major anxiety, depression, and panic attacks.  As you play the game, you are brought into Madeline’s mind through the mountain’s magical powers; you face her fears and have to fight through the mountain (quite literally in some places).  Each level grows more and more difficult, and with the increase in difficulty comes an increase in emotional attachment to Madeline–and the rest of the cast.

In terms of a simple review, Celeste is challenging and rewarding, with a great storyline, unpredictable twists and turns, and some of the most perfect music to accompany such a storyline.  It has both difficulty and accessability with the Assist Mode, which enables the player to essentially change the difficulty so that she can access the game in the way that works best for her.

But I want to say more.

Everyone in the world needs to play this game.  People who struggle with a mental illness need to play this game so they can see that there are ways to deal with these illnesses, to know they are not alone.  People who don’t struggle with a mental illness need to play this game so they can take a glimpse into the mind of someone else, to recognize that these are very real and very dangerous struggles.  Celeste isn’t a game worth passing over just because it’s hard or it doesn’t feature RPG-style battles or slash-‘em-up techniques.  This is something everyone needs.

I’ve always been a gamer.  I played Ocarina of Time when I was a kid and that, to me, summed up what a good game should be: not too hard, accessible to everyone, with a great storyline and music, and a satisfying ending.  Celeste is everything a good game should be, but more than that, it addresses an issue that’s becoming bigger and bigger in our society today: how do we deal with mental illnesses?  Do we try to cut them out of our souls?  Do we take heavy medication to make the pain go away?  Do we try to fend it off unassisted without ever saying a word to anyone?  What is the answer to a mental illness?

Celeste, true to its style, enables the player to extrapolate that answer for herself.  After a Part of Madeline (referred to as Badeline) escapes from an enchanted mirror near the bottom of the mountain, Madeline does everything she can to run away from or destroy Badeline, and in doing so, she puts herself and her newfound friends into serious and very real danger.  Trying to escape or hurt Badeline she faces does nothing to help Madeline, while the creepy-looking Badeline claims to be helping while doing everything she can to stop Madeline from climbing the mountain.  In the end, Madeline realizes that she cannot destroy this Part of Herself.  She must unite with it.

It is then that Badeline begins to run rather than chase, and Madeline must capture her.  When she catches up, Madeline recognizes, for the first time, that Badeline is frightened.  That she wants to run away from everything that’s difficult or dangerous.  And it is only then that Madeline can make true progress up the mountain; she and Badeline work together to climb the mountain.  Their success comes as a united effort between Madeline and her anxiety.

This, I feel, is what makes Celeste a great game, and a worthy purchase for anyone and everyone.  Madeline doesn’t destroy her anxiety in some magical or self-esteem building way; she uses her anxiety to become a stronger, more whole being.  Mental illnesses cannot be banished.  They cannot be destroyed.  They must remain inside our minds, and it is only through learning how to work with our illnesses that we can truly become whole.

HOWEVER.  If someone with a mental illness finds that medication or other safe methods of coping are helping him/her manage the mental illness, he/she should not give those up just because Madeline was able to survive without them.  That’s my caveat: don’t give up on things that work if they’re working now.  But if you don’t have something that helps you cope yet, consider a playthrough of Celeste as an aid to learning to cope.  No videogame or blog post can be a doctor or psychiatrist; if you have need of help, get it now.

That’s something else Celeste does; it shows that those with mental illnesses are benefited by kind, caring, and compassionate friends.  Madeline becomes friends with another traveler named Theo, who-between taking selfies and cracking jokes-creates a compassionate connection that Madeline is able to derive strength from.  Their friendship is one of the greatest things in Celeste; Theo is able to help calm Madeline during a panic attack and stays patient with her through the whole game.  He supports her in whatever efforts she chooses to make and is available when she needs to talk to him.  To those of you who know someone who struggles with a mental illness: be like Theo.  Be compassionate.  Be patient.  Support your friends in their struggles.  They need you more than they know how to express, and your patience with them is a kindness they can never thank you enough for–and they’ll probably thank you a lot between saying sorry for being an inconvenience to you.  Don’t ever put down their struggle or say it’s only in their head.  Remember, they need you more than they can say.  Your friendship is a precious gift to them.  And understand that even when they’re busy apologizing for the umpteenth time that they’ve caused you any trouble or discomfort, they love and appreciate you more than words can express.

On top of the game’s already incredible story, Celeste’s composer (Lena Raine) created a perfect score that matches each moment in the game; the soundtrack that accompanies Celeste is perfect for highlighting the difficulty and pain Madeline is going through.  I’m not well-versed in music theory, but I know what music feels like, and that’s the best part about this soundtrack.  Every piece is a perfect companion to when it occurs in the game; the track that plays during Madeline’s first (in-game) panic attack displays that terrible feeling so well that I was getting anxious and nearly had a panic attack myself while playing.  That is no easy feat for a composer, but Raine did a perfect job in writing music that would stir these feelings in people.  From Madeline’s panic attacks to the moment she becomes one with Badeline to the climax of the story, each piece of the score is a perfect reflection of what is happening in the story and brings out the feelings the characters are experiencing.

Celeste deserves a hundred stars (out of ten) for its gameplay/storytelling/immersive experience.  For me, Celeste was a fully-immersive game that reflected pains and struggles in my life.  I struggle with bipolar disorder; some of the side effects for me have been increased anxiety and occasional panic attacks.  But in some ways, the game hit too close to home for me; I would get frustrated and anxious while trying to beat the levels.  There came a point where I couldn’t continue to progress (and the game was only available to me for a few weeks), so I turned on the assist mode.  Assist mode made Celeste more accessible to me, because it removed the barrier my own illness had created.  For my brother and my sister, the game was perfect the way it was; neither needed assist mode the way I did, and my sister struggles with social anxiety.

One of the greatest things Celeste has done is highlight a brand-new facet of videogaming that I’m not sure has ever been fully considered before: gaming for awareness.  This game is more than a game and shows that there’s a whole new world of videogame storytelling available for creators to use.  Celeste has a perfect balance between gameplay and story and uses both to raise awareness of an issue that millions currently face.  If you haven’t played Celeste yet, give it serious consideration and don’t miss an opportunity to learn–or to share it with your friends so they have a chance to see inside your mind.  To admit that, to ask them to share in your struggle, might feel awkward or even painful; however, we need our friends.  And we need them to understand what we’re going through.  There is no challenge in the world that isn’t made worse by trying to face it alone.  We can’t succeed alone.  There may be times where we have to stand alone, but in those times, we should know that there are friends behind us, friends who believe in what we can do.

Please.  If you’re a gamer, if you’re not a gamer, if you struggle with a mental illness, if you don’t have any trouble with mental illnesses, consider purchasing and playing through this incredible game.  Its story highlights the painful and challenging life of a person with a mental illness, and that story is one everyone needs to be aware of.  We all need to be part of this discussion–and the solution.  For the hardcore gamers in the world, this game will challenge you–maybe not at first, but with the progression of each level, things only get more difficult.  For the non-gamers out there, assist mode is available to make the game accessible so you can experience the story without wanting to throw the controller away every time you fall down.  Buy this game; it’s worth every penny.

Eevee the Gamer’s rating for Celeste: 10/10.

http://www.celestegame.com/

#celeste #unnoticedgenius #nintendoswitch #xboxone #playstation4 #videogame #music #lenaraine #mentalhealth #mentalillness #awareness #storytelling #gamer #review #gamereview #celestegame #madeline #badeline #theo #friends #anxiety #panicattacks #bipolar #depression #mattmakesgames

[dropintomanga]

Faith Is Restored - An Interview With “Anime For Humanity”

Ever since I started this blog, I thought to myself whether I or someone else can start up a mental health organization that helps people using anime. I had some optimism at first, but grew jaded after seeing people’s impressions of anime and how anime was treated under the geek hierarchy over the years. Yet I found out that someone or should I say, a group of fans is doing what I envisioned in my head and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect

While I was reading up on the sudden “mental health” question that popped up in an “anime census”, I found out about an organization that anime fans should support when it came to mental health discussion. That organization is known as Anime For Humanity. They are based in Los Angeles and have been traveling throughout California at various conventions since starting in 2017.

I went to their site immediately and I was amazed that AFH are a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization dedicated to using a medium that many fans love to promote mental health awareness. So I decided to get an interview with AFH and their outreach manager, Ruby, got back to me. Here’s what she had to say on Anime For Humanity, their beginnings, a couple of their projects, the hashtag movement they started, and more.

Q: How did Anime for Humanity get started? What made you see that anime was inspiring for anyone with mental illness?

Ruby: Before Anime For Humanity (AFH) started, we were an anime club with a passion for anime and community. We volunteered with local charities and hosted events that people enjoyed. Then we realized there were specific ways anime could have an impact and make a difference in people’s lives.

When we first thought about the causes Anime For Humanity should tackle, we took a moment to reflect on what anime brought and changed in our personal lives. We found out that most of us suffered through depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicidal thoughts. Only a few us did get professional help and others didn’t because of the so-called “stigma."

Q: What professional backgrounds do you have in mental health?

Ruby: Since AFH started as an anime club, we all came from different backgrounds, including artists, teachers, computer scientists and therapy counselors.

We do close work with other LPCCs (licensed professional clinical counselors) and LMFTs (licensed marriage and family therapists) that volunteer to host panels, speak at events and run support groups.

As a member of the Anime For Humanity Clinical Advisory Board, it is very important for AFH to work with therapists and counselors who understand the fandom and use it as to a tool to help people find healing and recovery.

Q: Clinical Advisory Board?

Ruby: The Clinical Advisory Board is an initiative made by Anime For Humanity. It is still under the work and part of the Anime Therapy Project.  Since we attend a bunch of cons, a lot of licensed therapists stop by our booth and ask us to be involved in what we do. We call them the "Anime Therapists." :) 

The purpose of the Clinical Advisory Board is to discuss scientific research done on anime and help polish Anime For Humanity’s upcoming projects/programs. We also have been working on building a "find an anime therapist near you" (which is similar to our “Find Healing” resources, but with a twist) where the anime/geek community can find a therapist near them who understands the fandom and maybe uses it as a tool for therapy. 

So far, the project is still on alpha mode and local to LA. We are hopeful it will expand to other cities, states and around the world.

Q: With anime consumption almost completely online and anime conventions sometimes being the only spot to get fans together, how did you come up with ideas to get fans to come to your programs offline?

Ruby: Here in SoCal (Southern California), it happens that there is a convention every month where we get to be in touch with the attendees and tell them about what we do.

We are very grateful for all the convention organizers in our area because not only does the anime scene keep growing, but we also get to hand out local resources for people to get professional help.

Q: Describe what a typical workshop/support group session from Anime for Humanity is like.

The AFH support group is part of the Anime Therapy program, which is still under the works.

Q: What challenges came along the way as Anime for Humanity began to grow?

Ruby: One of the challenges Anime For Humanity faced when we first started was we weren't able to collaborate with other organizations because there wasn't much acceptance and support towards anime when discussing our mission and purpose.

Q: What did it take to get some of those who were skeptical onto your side? How did you convince them? I always felt anime has better acceptance in a place like California due to a large Asian population, Hollywood celebrities loving it, and a vibrant arts scene.

Ruby: At first, we couldn't convince them due to what they have been told about anime (ie. anime containing violent and sexual content) - things that didn't go with their mission and values. 

But once we showed them how conventions were growing (especially the growth of Anime Expo) and how anime presents themes such as kindness, courage, and friendship. We also told them our story of how anime gave us a purpose to make a change in our community. That gave a spark to start the conversation and change their minds about anime. And yes! You’re right about anime being more accepted in California. As I mentioned earlier, there is more than one convention happening each month here in California, where people celebrate their fandom (comics, anime, cosplay, etc) Seeing cosplayers on the train/metro, cons popping up everywhere; that made it easy to promote Anime For Humanity!

Q: I liked how you involve gamers of all kinds to support Anime for Humanity via the "Play Anime Project." In your opinion, what is it about gamers that make them the most charitable people out there?

Ruby: Gamers are a great community. They are passionate and empathetic. Especially when gaming with a purpose comes to play. Everyone would love to do what they are passionate about and help others at the same time.

The "Play Anime Project" is about taking and promoting new and fun anime games to non-anime conventions and start the conversation about the stigma of mental health with attendees.

Q: I found out about a program you had to combat illiteracy called “Take a Manga, Return a Manga Project." Given that manga literacy and comprehension can translate well into reading non-visual material, how did the program work and which series were the most helpful for fans struggling to read?

Ruby: “Take a Manga, Return a Manga” is a unique and exciting program we launched when we first started Anime For Humanity. Here are the 3 reasons why:

1. We wanted to promote anime/manga to a community who aren't familiar with either. Because as mentioned earlier, reaching out to that community was/is still one of the challenges we are facing.

2. We all have a bunch of manga collecting dust in our shelves. We thought how can we put those manga into use and make a space where values like sharing, friendship, and community are built in the anime community.

When we took the AFH library to a couple of conventions, we would invite the attendees to build one in their community, college, high school, etc. to bring those values and show the rest what anime is about.

3. Like you mentioned in your question, manga literacy and comprehension can\translate well into reading non-visual materials.

We have a special box for people to donate manga that will be taken to kids in orphanages as a way to fight illiteracy. Since the donated books were random, we do pick and choose the appropriate ones that will be given to the kids while the rest go back to the library.

Q: I wanted to ask about your thoughts about the recent Flying Colors Foundation situation where the now-defunct organization asked a question regarding users' mental health. There was a good amount of criticism towards FCF about that particular question. What concerns did you have over how they presented it?

Ruby: We believe the question about mental health could have been worded better or not have been asked at all. The survey was to show Japanese animation studios what most Westerners think and want in an anime, and not about personal mental health issues which are generally unrelated to their survey.

Q: I love the #SavedbyAnime hashtag you started, but there are times, as you and I know, where anime consumption can be harmful to someone. We've seen toxic situations involving fandom. How do you tell someone who may be letting anime or anime fandom take over their daily life that it's a good time to step back?

Ruby: “Too much of a good thing is good for nothing.” Moderation is always the key. Over-consumption of anything such as food, exercise, entertainment, and also medicine can be harmful. Finding balance in our lives is so important, yet it is so hard.

This is one of the complex questions that we face at conventions most of the time, since we have encountered many people saying “If it wasn’t for over-consuming anime, I'm not sure if I would be here right now.”

We tend not to judge or give advice to people, but paradoxically, our first approach is to invite people to watch an anime that would speak to their situation in life (Naruto, Welcome to the N.H.K, etc. for example). 

Then we follow up with them to ultimately help them understand what they are going through and hopefully get professional help. We believe all the struggles anime characters go through is to share with us their experiences that we can learn from and use it in our daily lives.

This is where we start the conversation and and educate people about the hashtag #SavedByAnime which is about how to use anime to find balance, growth and purpose in life.

Q: I noticed that there's an upcoming program called "Anime Therapy" on the front page of your site, which looks like screenings with some conversations afterwards, I believe? Can you talk more about it?

Ruby: We will keep you updated once it's ready for launch.

Q: Given that mental illness is becoming a popular topic in graphic novels and manga like “My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness” have hit mainstream success, what would like to see going forward in terms of anime covering portrayals of characters with mental illness?

Ruby: We would love to see more of the kinds of anime that cover characters with mental illness. For example, Welcome to the N.H.K depicted the struggles of a person who was suffering from mental illness. We also hope to see anime touch on the subject of getting professional help when in crisis.

This interview has been edited for clarity. 

You can visit Anime For Humanity at http://www.animeforhumanity.org.

#Anime for Humanity #anime #manga #mental health #otaku fandom #therapy #psychology #interviews #non-profit organization #mental health organizations

[maidenariana]

3 Years! Sorry this is a long post and you may have to manually load the last couple of images!

That’s right, I have hit my 3-year mark of being on HRT. Halloween is my hormone-iversary! It just happened to be the day that my HRT prescription was first filled and available to me. The 3-year mark for HRT is widely considered to be about the point in time when HRT has done most of its work for those transitioning. As I prepare for my surgery in two weeks, this is a look back at the events and pics in and around the month of October for the past 3 years in the life of Ari..

-----2014-----

The Good - 2014: 

Since February of 2014, I began to be much healthier after deciding to finally accept and address the fact that I was transgender and planned to share that with other people. I took it slow, but I immediately started to care about actually taking care of myself and my body once I had finally forgiven myself for being transgender (it sounds ridiculous I know). By the time the photos above were taken, I had already lost about 30 pounds and would eventually lose over 65 pounds.

By October 31st, I had visited the Howard Brown Center in Chicago multiple times and I got my first HRT prescription filled on Halloween (it just happened to be that day - easy to remember though!). My plan at that point was just to be on HRT and hope that it helped me with my dysphoria. It turns out it was a night and day difference and in a matter of weeks it was as if the lights were on for the first time in my life.

Major Stresses at the time - 2014:

Out to my spouse, only one friend, and one family member

When I come out to my spouse, she tells me she can't be with a woman, so I do not view fully transitioning as being in my future

I had to go to Howard Brown and seek help on my own because I am desperate for the dysphoria to be addressed

I feel utterly alone in dealing with all of this and along with suffering massive guilt at the same time because I blame myself even though I should not

-----2015-----

The Good - 2015:

I spend the first part of 2015 becoming more androgynous.

I am out to my children, but I switch back to guy mode whenever I am around them to give them time to adjust.

Being out and about finally as myself, I begin to make friendly acquaintances with some employees at grocery stores, salons, and clothing stores I frequent. 

My hair is slowly growing out but my signature curls are already in full effect.

Also - I finally like Halloween, now that I feel like myself under the costume! So, yay for costumes!

Major Stresses at the time - October 2015:

Over 5 months of marriage counseling failed to do anything about the fact that I was and would always be transgender and my spouse did not want to be with a transgender woman. The decision had been made in September to get a divorce and knowing my marriage is over I decide to begin working towards fully transitioning.

Moved to a new apartment all by myself with no help. 

Dealing with being surrounded by smoking neighbors in my little one bedroom apartment (YUCK!!).

Supporting two households on my one income.

Going through painful electrolysis on my facial hair.

Spending time still attempting 'boy mode' when with my kids and parents so they can have time to adjust.

Being gendered as male or female on any given day while out shopping, just living my life.

Being regularly misgendered by my parents and siblings during visits and one of my closest family members has rejected me completely

-----2016-----

I declare 2016 "The Year of Ari.” I was determined to allow myself to fully come out to the world.

The Good - 2016

In March, my Kids tell me I can pick them up "As myself." From that moment on.. no more boy mode! In May, I complete my official name change! I was also totally out at work by this point but I was working from home so I only see co-workers occasionally for major events or work trips. I have been out swimming again in both one and two piece (but still mid-riff covering) bathing suits. I published my first article as a contributor to The Huffington Post. I switched from electrolysis to laser hair removal on my face. By the start of summer, I have begun to see a therapist with the intention of meeting the WPATH guidelines for gender confirmation surgery. By focusing on being more social and going to meetups (thank you Meetup.com!) throughout 2016, I have built a network of friends in and around what I now consider my home town. 

In the fall, I began streaming on my Twitch gaming channel - but not at all on a regular schedule.

Major Stresses at the time - October 2016:

Divorce nearing the end phase and dealing with lawyers and legal speak is not something I handle well.

Under major financial distress

A shortage in Estradiol medication causes me to have to switch from injections to patches and my numbers drop severely low. Dysphoria hits me hard for a solid month.

Still being regularly misgendered by my parents and siblings during visits and one of my closest family members has still rejected me completely

-----2017-----

Ari is now officially single again

The Good - 2017

My relationship with my kids is as amazing as ever and my teenage daughter and I connect in new ways and have lots more to discuss ;) After all, we are both going through puberty at the same time! My son and I are also doing great and you can occasionally witness us playing games as a team on my Twitch channel (though he is off camera).

My divorce was finalized at the beginning of 2017.

I declared this the Decade of Ari, because one year was not enough ;)

I am once again working in the office two days a week (I am actually enjoying it!), though the rest of the week I work from home.

I am pretty much "there" as far as facial hair removal goes, but I still deal with some slow growing colorless hairs on my chinny chin chin (these hairs are by-products of earlier electrolysis that laser won't help with). I want to have electrolysis on my face soon to finish off those little buggers.

I went mostly blonde! At least for a while :)

I have begun dating again!

I am streaming on Twitch on a regular basis.  

Thanks to donations from many of you, I received just barely enough assistance to make my surgery happen. My goal has not been met, and there is still a large financial burden I am having to meet. (if you want to help and can, here is the link: http://youcaring.com/helparianaout )

Major Stresses at the time - 2017:

Preparing for Surgery (so anxiety inducing) - planning, calling, managing, attending appointments, more calling, more managing, and more calling, more appointments...

As a pre-surgical requirement, I had a mammogram and in doing so also had a breast cancer scare (it turned out to be nothing after a followup mammogram and an ultrasound, but for 9 days I suddenly began having to think that my surgery might never happen and I might have to instead begin to battle cancer).

Three long sessions of electrolysis performed on my crotch for surgery prep = enough said!

One of my closest family members has still rejected me completely

Thank you for taking a look back with me. I am sorry for monopolizing your dash for this long post. I am very grateful to my tumblr community though and I wanted to celebrate this with you. A hormone-iversary feels like a re-birthday to many of us who transition and it is special. You may notice that I smile a lot and I try to maintain a positive attitude no matter what is happening in my life. It has been the central key to getting where I am now. It helps that through all of the trials, simply being able to be myself brought out so much happiness that I could always find that feeling again. :)

I am also grateful for every donation I have received. As I mentioned, there was just enough donated (by the slimmest of margins!) for me to be confident enough to move forward with this. 

On to surgery and on to seeing what 2018 will bring!

-Ari

For more about my story and for my transgender advocacy website: http://arianadanielle.com

For donations: http://youcaring.com/helparianaout

For my Twitch channel: http://twitch.tv/maidenariana

I almost forgot!!

What would a Halloween Hormone-iversary be without Costumes! 

Yay! I love dressing up for Halloween now that I can finally be me while doing it!

Happy Halloween everyone!

#RE-BLOGS OKAY ONLY IF YOU ARE NOT A PORN BLOG

#decade of ari #trans positivity #trans is beautiful #girls like us #transgender #gender transition #Transgender woman #transgender mtf #Transwoman #long post #3 years hrt #hrt 3 years #36 months hrt #hrt 36 months #Ariana's Transition Pics

[mariajustinteriordesigns]

My Business During Corona + New Online Class - Coming Soon!

Hello friends, it’s so nice to sit here today with good tunes playing and my coffee nearby. I’m watching the ice rain (!) fall gently outside thinking, “Ok, the weather sucks, Corona is totally in “game-on” mode, so it’s the PERFECT time to improve a business and do what you’ve always wanted to do.”

Right? Oh yeah.

And this is exactly the truth. It’s time. There is no other time like the present, particularly with Corona, no vacations to plan or go on, no parties to attend or throw, holidays and birthdays are a bust, nothing to distract - you can’t even indulge in a little retail therapy… Yet there is a silver lining and it’s this: there is NO TIME LIKE NOW for figuring out what you want to be when you grow up or to level up your current business.

THERE IS NO DISTRACTION!

Yes, maybe the kids are homeschooling (my boy is only in school every other day for half a day), and you have a struggle getting time management down if you’re home with the children. I get that. I’m with you. Or perhaps you aren’t working as much and trying to make ends meet. Perhaps you ARE working but just damn sick of doing the same ole same ole. If that’s the case, maybe you have thought:

I SERIOUSLY NEED TO RUN A SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS FROM HOME.

Well, have you thought that?

You can.

I’ve been working from home since 2005. No joke. I resigned from my corporate job, back then I was earning 75K a year as a project manager. I resigned and made $0 for the first 3 months. But I started my blog, decor8, and within a year, I was earning what I made in corporate, and by the second year, I was earning double that, and now it’s been 15 years working freelance, running primarily a home-based one-woman show, and I’m 100% certain I can sustain this until retirement and beyond. I will always be an entrepreneur.

Yes, there have been some minor (and a current major speed bump) along the way, but the major speed bump came after nearly 15 years during 2020. It took a GLOBAL PANDEMIC to disrupt me and my business. A pandemic.

If Corona hadn’t occurred, I’d still be running my business securely as I have been for 15 years which means that if I can do it, so can you. And after Corona, we all WILL if we get it together NOW. At the moment, I’ve decided to pivot a bit. I’m using this precious time to really think about what I love, what I miss, what I don’t miss, and what I need going forward to make me, and decor8, better.

Here is what I’ve decided so far:

1 / I need to make my business more digitally-focused (and fun!) again.

2 / I want to be in closer touch with my people (all of you) because it fuels my creativity and makes me happy.

3/ I will write my 5th book, a big coffee table book, part two of DECORATE.

4/ I must get back to teaching, online and in-person because I taught online from 2009-2018, and before that, part of my job in corporate was as a trainer for 7 years, so it’s just part of my DNA to teach.

5/ Create something from HOLLY magazine that makes me happy and has value to all of you.

6/ Eventually build something brand new that I’ve never done before to mix-in, just to keep me entertained and happy. Maybe a retail shop (yeah, I know - of all things).

7/ Once fairs start, attend only 4-5 each year vs. 10+

8/ Launch online classes again because they are the heart of my heart and always brought me the most light and happiness.

9/ Be less shy of video and start doing my own, more and more, evolving it into something greater.

10/ Not accept being called an Influencer anymore (especially by brands), cutting myself out of that market altogether, because I don’t like what it conveys. I don't want to influence or force anyone, I want to represent, guide, teach, be known as a tastemaker even… But not an influencer. I’m far beyond that in my career, with my experience, and at my age. I don’t want to dance or sing on TikTok.

So that’s my list.

What things have you decided for yourself and your business for 2021 and even, beyond?

And what is your list? Can you share it below?

Next, in line no. 8 above, I’m relaunching Blogging Your Way online classes under a new name: decor8 courses. Very simple and directly related to my brand. Blogging Your Way evolved throughout the years to include styling classes, photography lessons, Instagram training and so much more than traditional blogging. It makes sense to rebrand simply as decor8 courses because then I don’t have to stick to one topic.

I also decided to create a community around decor8 courses so that my students can always stay logged in months after the class is over and talk to each other, and receive regular drips of content from me. Students will also have lifetime access to the class, and when I update the class modules for future students, they get all of the updates for free because it’s included in their one-time payment when they originally enroll in the class.

This means I also dissolved bloggingyourway.com and I dropped WordPress where the class had been built by my husband, and drop the forum on that site that he had worked to develop over the years. It’s over and I’m fine with it and so is he. He left decor8 in 2018, he was a partner from 2009 until 2018, but he went his own way with his business and I went my way. He does a lot of work for interesting brands, like Skandinavisk, and I’m happy for him - because he is usually what he was trained in and what he’s best at for brands that need him. He’s an expert at extracting data and making sense of it and as a result, helping businesses to really grow and thrive. Working together indefinitely was never part of our plan, it just sorta happened based on the urgency of the moment. My classes were hugely popular and I needed help and he was here, he is technically gifted, and so he became the go-to for managing my teaching “platform”.

With him out of the business, I had to consider how to rebuild the classes because WordPress and multiple plug-ins and having regular conversations with plug-in developers, etc. just wasn’t my thing. I shopped around and found two sites that will make my teaching dreams come true again, but on platforms that I am able to maintain. I understand the technology and actually used to build websites back in the good old days of coding in HTML, but a lot of changed since then, and I haven’t kept up with site builds and maintenance in so long, and server management, etc. that I definitely had to find an easy solution for running the new class site.

When the next class goes live for enrollment, if you want to get your business back in shape, or make your current business stronger and better, you really need to invest in this class. I mean, it’s gonna be the bomb. It’s not much of an investment at $329, but for some of you, it may be… And this is why I kept the course price low - so everyone who wants in can get in and if you sign up for my mailing list, you can get it for $50 off the enrollment so it’s only $279 for you.

SUBSCRIBE FOR $50 OFF

It would be easy for me to charge over $1,000 for it, because the new class will be better than any I’ve ever taught online - fuller, richer, more dynamic, more guest experts, lifetime access, a lifetime community (and no, not a Facebook group!), and just better all around. But for $329 ($279 with the code) you can experience something quite fantastic and loaded with all the help that you need to take your blog, Instagram and newsletters to the next level because really, these are THE three core channels, the foundation, of any successful online business and that’s why I’m kicking off the new decor8 courses with a class dedicated to those topics.

SO my dear friends… that’s an update from my home office to you. Wishing you much love and support in these difficult times. I’m here for you (always) and once the class is live, I’ll let you know and you can enroll and then, we can be together for 5 weeks and ROCK YOUR BUSINESS.

Love,

Holly

Photos by Sincerely Media on Unsplash

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