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taesthetes · 6 years

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tag games.

alright, let’s do this-- i just realized i had like five tag games in my likes, but they’re pretty similar so i’ll do two of them :D

game number one.

tagged by this sunshine @rosaetae ♡

appearance:

hmm alright so i’m 5 foot 7 or 170 cm, and i weigh 125 lbs, which is 57 kg i think? my hair almost reaches my butt, but i definitely need to get it trimmed. i had red dip dye earlier, but the color faded, so it’s like an ombre now. i’m vietnamese, and i’m on the paler side in my family. i think my lips are pretty full, and my eyes are large? or at least that’s what my relatives all tell me. and i have a dimple on my left cheek! and i sometimes have those tiny hobi dimples. um i’ll be posting a selfie tag right after this, so you’ll actually see my face then lmao

personality:

i’m an introverted extrovert! meaning, i am very social, i enjoy meeting new people and making friends in all my classes, but at the same time, i don’t divulge a lot of information about myself LOL i go to parties and stuff usually once a week, and i socialize a lot there, but in my mind, i’m just thinking about going back to my bed and binging criminal minds or the great british baking show. one of my friends actually told me that before she even got to judge me the first time she saw me, i already introduced myself and started talking to her akdhfsa so i’m very outgoing, loud, and sarcastic, and i’d like to think of myself as hilarious too. i try to be nice to everyone and am usually very chill, but if someone is super rude, then oh boy, i will go off on them

ability:

art!!! i love art with all my heart, and i’d like to say that i’m decent at it since i’m pursuing a minor in studio arts. i’d like to think i have athletic ability as well since i played three different sports and did cheerleading and four types of dances when i was younger. oh, and i’ve played the piano for sixteen years and the drums! also the recorder because that was mandatory in middle/junior high school lmao and i’m also very good at mental math. as for linguistics, i can communicate in english, spanish, and vietnamese.

hobbies:

studio arts is a big one, so drawing, painting, stamp carving, stenciling, etc. i also really love cooking and baking, but i don’t like eating the sweets. i just give whatever i bake to my friends and family lol and i gym five times a week, so does that count as a hobby? i also love sleeping, reading books, and binging crime shows

relationships:

not interested. my friends and i downloaded tinder for fun, and we just like to comment on the profiles. the total of people i have swiped right for in the whole year i’ve had my tinder is a whopping total of 11 (and 3 of those were dogs), and i always unmatch after the third message. i just ask my matches what food places they’d rec and that’s it. unmatch straight afterwards asdkfjasdh

random stuff:

kim taeyeon is the center of my universe, kim jisoo is the ultimate goddess, kim taehyung owns my heart, and nct dream can run me over with those bikes in go and i’d thank them and give them all my money in my bank account.

game number two.

tagged by this cutie patootie @minigguk ♡

1. Which BTS song means the most to you?

no more dream because it’s the first mv i ever saw of them when i got into kpop four years ago, and i really contemplated using suga’s “i wanna big house, big car, and big rings, but i don’t have any big dreams” as my senior yearbook quote.

2. How do you feel about astrology?

well, personally, i think it’s a bunch of hooey because all the descriptions and whatnot that are for each sign is written to be broad enough that it feels personal if that makes sense? like i can read the stuff for another sign that isn’t mine and can still feel that it applies to me. but do i still read my horoscopes and look for my sign in astrology posts? heck yeah i do

3. Do you think ghosts exist?

maybe? i need real life experience as proof to actually believe, not those grainy videos with what looks like dust particles floating around

4. What’s your favorite instrument?

the piano! i have a love-hate relationship with it though because i love listening to piano music, but i hate playing it myself

5. Who was the last person to make you really smile?

my mom :’) i was showing her snapchat filters and she got so excited, and she wanted me to take lots of her pics with them and text them all to her

6. What do you do when you feel vulnerable?

idk probably sleep? can’t be vulnerable when you’re unconscious. actually wait, you are physically vulnerable if some serial killer is after you and you’re sleeping, but feelings wise, sleep makes that vulnerability go away

7. What is the last dream you had?

LOL omg okay so i told this dream to an and mel, but like i was doing some survival competition and i had to climb trees and check under rocks and all this stuff in the jungle to find these clues, which were hand written on binder paper and sealed in plastic bags. i already had one clue, and i knew the other people competing had zero, so heck yeah, i’m on top!!! but anyway, i stumble onto the remains of a plane crash site and i’m sifting through everything and i find some good stuff, like a compass, but then, i get to this locked cabinet thing and i can’t get it to open and taeyong comes out of nowhere??? and first in my mind, i’m kinda like is he here to steal my clues /: but he actually helps me open the cabinet and looks through stuff, and then i find the clue in one of the bags, and i’m like oh do you want to see it too? and taeyong is just like it’s up to you if you want to share! it’s your clue! :D and he just leaves??? like wow WHAT A NICE MAN but also i better gather some weapons in case he tries to ambush me later

also the weapons are definitely needed because after seeing taeyong, i’m thinking i’m probably competing against everyone in nct and i trust none of them, except maybe taeyong, mark, and jeno. also taeyong’s face was like six inches away from mine at one point, and wow how does someone look that good even in the middle of a dirty jungle? i’m jealous

8. Are you a nature person?

maybe? i absolutely adore flowers, and i like hiking in the mornings with my parents during the summer

9. What’s your favorite thing to do to relieve stress?

sleep LOL. eat ice cream and binge my favorite tv shows

10. Do you have any other blogs you’d like people to check out?

yes check out everyone i tag in this thing!!

11. Marvel, DC, or neither?

marvel!

12. What do you want out of 2018?

a good gpa, my driver’s license, good health

13. Do you hold grudges?

i don’t have the time nor energy to care that long about someone who upset me

14. Who is your favorite Disney hero/heroine?

mulan!!! i also really like peter pan and tiana. as a child, i adored cinderella

15. Do you consider yourself a positive person?

hmm, i’d say i’m positive to a certain extent? i don’t want to give false hope though, so i usually tell things as it is as nicely as possible. so i’m a balance of realistic and positive.

16. What is something you love that’s underrated?

um idk what’s considered underrated, does nct count

17. What is your dream job?

gordon ramsey’s job :D

18. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?

right now, i really wanna be the protagonist in that stereotypical rom com movie and live to nyc but i don’t want the dude / love interest that comes with it

19. When was the last time you faced a fear and how did it go?

two weeks ago, i faced my final for my financial accounting class which was taught by a masters professor, who explicitly told us that he taught this undergrad class the exact same way as his masters class for financial accounting because he only teaches one undergrad class a year. the final was 30 pages long of one continuous problem. it was full of calculations and writing up journal entries, and i managed to get an A- in that class.

20. Which would you prefer to read: poetry, fiction, or non-fiction?

currently? poetry!

21. Where do you feel most at ease?

when i’m at home

i tag these lovely people for one or both of these tag games: @kidguk ; @jimlingss ; @kthartics ; @minigguk ; @rosaetae ; @kingdomtae ; @milknotes ; @vantae ; @cheelchan ; @1rapmon ♡

#tag game #thank you for tagging me!!

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moonprizmz · 7 years

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Stolen from @ambulantics <3 (she said to do them in her tags, but also these are fun and I do what I want)

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?

My emotions have been all over the place lately and I have to start applying for classes soon and have no clue which ones to pick and AHHHHHHHHH

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

Nopw

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

Not really, just don’t do it around me please.

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?

Sorta, depends

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?

Watching anime (NGE specifically)

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

Pird most likely

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

I honestly don’t know. I’d probably be devastated though

8: Are you close with your dad?

Yeah sorta, but I don’t get to see him as much as I would like for reasons

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

10: What are you listening to?

Lion Heart - SNSD

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

Chai Tea Lattes!!!!

12: Do you like hickeys?

Never had one but the idea is kinda hot

13: What time do you go to bed?

between 3-6am (it’s summer vacation here and I don’t go out ever)

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

Not really

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

Probably not

16: Do you always answer your texts?

Generally yeah

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

Texting her right now but in person/over the phone, I think last week

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

Yeah

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

I need to stop sleeping at 6 am

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?

Nope

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

Yeah

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

Yeah

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Yeah

25: In the past week, have you cried?

lololololol yup

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

Gray

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

Maybe

29: Do you have a best friend?

Yeeeee

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

Yeah

31: Who was your last call/text message from?

My mom/Pird

32: Are you mad at anyone?

Kinda?

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

If a month older counts then yeah sure

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

35: How many more days until your birthday?

I don’t feel like doing the math but my bday is in Feb.

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?

Maybe Little Tokyo/626 Night Market with fam, but other than that no. Oh and finally taking my fucking driving test (and hopefully passing first try)

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

Yeah

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

Yeah

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

I don’t think so, at least not the big ones

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

Yeah

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?

If you’re underage and even barely legal, yes, otherwise no just proceed with caution

42: Are you available?

Emotionally, no

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

One

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

Naval

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?

It’d be nice

46: Do you regret anything?

Yeeee

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

School and people

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

It feels like it

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

Because it wouldn’t be right

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

Yeah

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

Not right now

53: What was the last thing you ate?

Pasta salad

54: Did you get any compliments today?

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?

Probably Philippines

56: Do you own anything from other countries?

Yeeee (still crying from all the money spent in Japan)

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?

Uh I think it’s pretty even

58: Where have you lived most of your life?

SoCal

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?

Last weekend I think? (I actually drove for like 2 hrs not straight, but still I drove)

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

No (but like I always wanted to secretly, but only amongst close/trusted friends)

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

Yeah

62: Who do you text the most?

PIRD

63: What was the last movie you saw?

Wonder Woman

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

I’m single

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?

0 (not counting the “middle school bf” I had at the time, that wasn’t a real relationship)

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

67: Do you curse around your parents?

68: Are you happy with where you live?

Not really

69: Picture of yourself?

I posted prom pics of me last year you are welcome to look for

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

Monogamy, I personally don’t think I could be in an open relationship

71: Have you ever been dumped?

Yeah I guess? But it was more along the lines of talking it out and then ending

72: What do you most like about making out?

Being physically close and intimate with a person I’m connected too

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?

Once? In middle school but it was more the guy caught me by surprise and tried to eat my face for 5 secs before I pulled away all grossed out

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

The other

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?

Hair and if they have more toned arms

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

Pird

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?

Never had sex

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

See above

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?

Kpop idols when they’re trying their best to speak English/the language of the country they’re performing in that isn’t their own

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

Not at the moment since I’m still pretty young, but I wouldn’t be opposed to it when I’m older

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?

Yeah

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

Not really

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?

Yeah

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?

Prom last year

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?

86: How can I win your heart?

Be a generally good person that can make me laugh and I can chill with and has something they’re passionate about

87: What is your astrological sign?

Aquarius

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

Anime

89: Do you cook?

lololololol (I could probably follow a fairly easy recipe though)

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

Kinda

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

Not super experienced, but I think I’m too awkward/uncomfortable with dating around so probably monogamy

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?

I’m not really super specific or picky, but taller than me (doesn’t have to be by a lot) and maybe have nice hair

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

MONEY, a driver’s license, more freedom/independence, a clear purpose in life (whoops, got too deep?)

95: Are you a player?

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

Yeah

97: Are you a tease?

I guess?

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?

Yeah

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

Idk

101: Hugs or Kisses?

Both

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?

Yes

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

Hair

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

Yeah

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?

106: Do you flirt a lot?

Not really? I don’t think so?

107: Your last kiss?

2 months ago

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

Won’t say

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?

Nope

112: Does someone like you currently?

Probably not

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?

It’s confusing

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

Serious relationship (never had a fling, but I’m pretty sure it’s not for me)

115: Ever made out with just a friend?

No? (it was an ambiguous time)

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?

I think in a relationship, but I’m trying really hard to learn to be happy with just me

117: Your own question that you want me to answer. Just write it.

Would you like to be able to actually start/finish all these art projects you said you would do and have them turn out actually nice? Heck yesssss

#asks #answered #even though no one asked in the first place #i do what i want

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dudence-blog · 7 years

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Dear Dudence for 5 October 2017

It’s the start of the ALDS and the Astros are up on the Red Sox 8-2 in the top of the 9th. To celebrate this it’s time to enjoy a St. Arnold’s and get on to answering the people seeking help from Prudence!

My 15-year-old daughter is a freshman in high school and has her first serious boyfriend. They are both star athletes, honor students, nondrinkers, and really nice kids. I love it that they are starting this new adventure in the dating scene together. He is a year older than she is and occasionally drives her around town. He is black, and she is white. What, if anything, should I say to her about traffic stops?

Dear Concerned Mom, Newdie did a great job informing us of the risks inherent to be a black person in America. I think we are all owe a debt of gratitude to the late 20s white woman for explaining to us about the horrors of institutional racism. While we are grateful for her enlightening point of view based on her extensive experience, she did a pretty damn poor job of answering the question you asked. What you’re asking about isn’t really dating advice; it is advice for situations across a wide spectrum of activities. You’re not being a “crazy white mom” to talk with your child (who will soon be driving age herself) about how to react when, not if, she is stopped by the police. It has nothing to do with you being worried that her boyfriend is going to get profiled, it has to do with the fact if you drive long enough you’re going to get stopped. When stopped, whether as the driver or passenger, tell her to remain calm, be polite, keep your hands visible, and don’t interfere with the police. Follow the instructions from the officer, and if she receives conflicting instructions stop and ask for clarification. Most importantly try not to make the situation worse. A good thing to keep in mind is that she is dealing with someone is one of the few people society has given the authority to initiate the use of force, including lethal force. Even if the police are completely in the wrong, they pulled her boyfriend over because he’s black and they are being awful people abusing their authority on the street while stopped is not the place where the problem can be addressed. Heck, it might not be able to be addressed elsewhere because life just ain’t fair, but it certainly can’t be addressed there at the point of friction. The police officer is not going to hear a teenage girl tell him “you are, like, totally wrong to be stopping him and you’re only stopping him because he’s black!” and respond with “You know what Kindra, you’re right. I was mistaken, here is your license sir. Please drive safely.” Have the conversation with your daughter about how, because of her boyfriend’s race, it is possible he’s going to be unjustly targeted by police. That it’s “not okay” for that to happen, and that you and your family, as decent people want to do everything you can to combat that attitude. Heck, if you want to have a conversation with your daughter about the wider issues of racism in society, how her privilege as the child of wealthy parents living in an upper class neighborhood means she’s the cause of all of society’s ills, knock yourself out. But that is separate from the issue of “what to do if you’ve just been stopped by police”.

My husband and I have been preparing to adopt a baby from “Anita” for six months. We’ve paid Anita’s medical bills and an allowance so Anita didn’t have to work too hard during her final trimester. She’s due in six weeks, and we discovered by accident that at some point she’d changed her mind. Anita will be keeping her baby. It’s a devastating but not unexpected loss. My husband and I wish Anita well, because we want her baby to succeed, but we also want to sever our relationship with her.

Dear Paying for Baby, that is quite the gut-punch. Anita’s mother can lob all the accusations she wants, that doesn’t mean she’s correct. Regardless of whether you and your husband could afford to keep financing Anita’s pregnancy while pursuing another adoption option, it wouldn’t be heartless for you to stop. Anita and your family had an agreement and she has reneged on her end of the agreement. You’re under no obligation to continue and don’t let BadPru’s habit of ignoring information you provide in your letter guilt you into considering something against your short and long term interests.. If you were working with a lawyer I’d recommend speaking with them about terminating your support, and if you’re not working with one I’d recommend getting one who’s experienced in family law and adoption. As for BadPru’s assumption you’re working either independently or with a disreputable agency, you can tell her to pound sand. It’s not like “mother putting baby up for adoption changes her mind” is a wholly unheard of event within “reputable” adoption services.

I have a weird etiquette question: I was in an abusive marriage for a decade, and after we split, I had to distance myself from both my social and professional circles because we worked in the same industry. I’m very healthy and happy now. Recently, I’ve started to fold a few previous connections back into my life. Nobody has any idea how bad the abuse was, or why we divorced, and I still have to see my ex on occasion.

Dear No Polite Way to Say This, I’m not sure which is the weird etiquette part. Is it where you’re not sure how much you want to reveal about the circumstances of your divorce or is it the part where you think people want to hear the details of the circumstances of your divorce? That you’re asking about “etiquette” makes me think you’re looking for advice when dealing with more casual acquaintances; co-workers, peers within the industry, etc. “Oh you know Elaine too? Yes, we were married, but we divorced a few years ago,” for most people standing around at an industry convention that would be enough information. If you want to invite follow-up questions then say it wasn’t amicable. If we’re talking about a more intimate relationship; say a friend who knows the both of you, then it’s really going to be limited to what you’re comfortable discussing. “Yes, Elaine and I had a very troubled marriage, it got really bad towards the end and I left.” I will advise you that if you get into discussing your spouse’s abuse it’s going to get back to them and you’re going to open-up a whole new realm of social-etiquette fun. Counter-accusations, justifications, side-choosing, etc. While Newdie thinks it isn’t the case some people will be put off by your revealing the unpleasant details of your marriage, Newdie has a well-established history of being shockingly ignorant of how people can interact in a work environment (seriously, the new hire wanting a window view is a reasonable idea?!!?). There are people in your professional and casual social circles who will be put-off by your “over-sharing”. It’s going to put some people in a position where they feel obligated to distance themselves from either your ex or you. It’s not fair, it’s probably not how it should be, but the world doesn’t deal in “should”. I’m glad you’re doing well now and I wish you the best of luck in retaking some of those parts of your life.

I’ve known my friend “B” for around five years. We met as students and had a wonderful companionship through school and still remain close. The only problem is her escalating interest in the cast of a television show, particularly one male actor. It began with a minor interest in the show while we were students. She was going through a rough time personally and began watching; over the years, she has become so obsessed with one of the lead actors that she now spends thousands of dollars to go to conventions across the country, attends related events, and generally finds reasons to be in his neighborhood. They have “coincidentally” met several times, and he was rude to her on multiple occasions. This is only a fraction of what B has done to research, stalk, and meet this actor, who is twice her age. He now recognizes her.

Dear Caught Up in Fandom, a dude dressing up as a surprisingly convincing Super Girl might be caught up in fandom. Your friend blew past that and went off the cliff into “creepy shrine” territory a while ago. Your friend has a problem, and today I learned there is a whole spectrum of problems dealing with people who become obsessed with a celebrity. As for your actual question, I’m not a fan of ghosting. There are situations where it’s the least bad option, but people generally deserve to the respect that comes from saying “hey, it’s been fun but we’re just after different things; you’re not interesting, etc”. Other friends have told B that her behavior is disturbing and driving them away, so it’s not like she hasn’t been made aware how people people. Maybe she’s not putting 1 and 1 together, but she probably is. I think you should tell your friend what her actions have been doing to you and why you’re going to cut her out of your life. If you want to leave the line open to reconnect in the future that’s your prerogative.

I have been with my husband for five years. He is attentive, kind, thoughtful, and attractive, which are all qualities that make him appealing to other women. Four years ago he cheated on me, and I found out almost immediately after the affair started. He showed remorse, we went to counseling, and I decided to stay with him. Since the affair, I check his Facebook, emails, phone calls, and texts regularly. It’s obviously insane and has become somewhat of an obsession. I have attempted counseling but this hasn’t stopped or curbed my snooping. I am just waiting to catch him again and feel that it’s only a matter of time before he strays.

Dear Husband Monitor, you should probably attempt counseling again. Try a different therapist. I don’t know what, if anything, there is about you which screams “cheat on me”. To say “because you believe they will and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy” is tempting, but unfair and not very helpful. Long-term relationships do end, and the infidelity at the end of your previous relationships might have been a symptom rather than a cause. Eventually you’re going to need to have a talk with your husband about your feelings here. You’re not clear about whether he’s aware you’re checking up on him, so I’m going to assume he isn’t. That is probably going to be an unhappy conversation because it involves a pretty significant breach of trust (whether it is as bad as cheating in a marriage is a debate I’ll leave to the philosophers). You’re going to need to talk with him about your feelings, why you are so anxious and suspicious, and whether it is reasonable. Your snooping on him doesn’t seem to be helping you, and you don’t refer to anything other than your history as to why he will eventually stray. It might be time to let him out of the doghouse, and that forgiveness might have the added benefit of giving yourself the permission to trust again. I know how hard it can be to put your trust and faith into someone, and how much, much harder it is to restore those feelings after they’ve been betrayed. But holding on to that isn’t doing you any good.

I am a casual Spanish speaker—I can understand a good bit of what I hear and read, but have more difficulty speaking it. My mom, bless her, thinks I am fluent. Normally, this isn’t a problem. She might call sometimes with a question about something she heard on TV or about something on a menu, but that’s it. Recently though, something happened that made me uncomfortable. She had some furniture delivered, and the men who dropped it off spoke Spanish. She wanted me to give them instructions in Spanish, and I told her it wasn’t necessary, as it was obvious they also spoke English.

Dear Not Your Translator, after you follow NuPru’s advice and lecture your mother about her racism, then delve into just what drove her to those thoughts, you should grab a cup of hot chocolate and talk about health insurance. You don’t need to be racist to be irrational. Maybe your mom is uber racist, maybe she is just normally racist or maybe she isn’t, but that doesn’t change the fact it can be off-putting to be left outside a conversation happening in front of you because you don’t sprich die sprach. There’s also nothing wrong with you informing her you’re not comfortable eavesdropping on someone else’s conversation. Heck, go ahead and let her know you think it’s rude for her to ask you to do so. But you can set your boundaries while also assuaging her concerns; let her know that if you do hear anything untoward you’ll address it and then don’t. She gets what she wants: she’s comforted by knowing you’re listening in. You get what you want: you’re not having to listen in. The work crew gets what they want: to do their job while talking about the ignorant woman and he dumbass child. It’s a Win-Win-Win!

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newstfionline · 7 years

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When They Say ‘State Your Name,’ She Says: ‘Yes, It Is’

By Manny Fernandez, NY Times, Feb. 14, 2017

HOUSTON--I called Texas the other day. The telephone rang and rang, but nobody picked up. I was about to hang up when she finally answered. Texas was, indeed, home.

I asked to speak with Texas June Smith.

“This is her,” she replied.

After a brief introduction, I asked Ms. Smith to tell me the story that nearly everyone who meets her wants to hear--how and why she was named for the 28th state to join the Union.

“When I was born my mother was expecting a boy, and instead she got a girl, and she had no name,” recalled Ms. Smith, 73. “I was born at home. The old Dr. Locker, there in Brownwood, Texas, after I was born, he said, ‘Well, Stella, what you gonna name her?’ And mother says, ‘Well, I don’t know.’ Since it was June the 21st when I was born, my mother says, ‘Well, June is a pretty name. I think I’ll call her June.’ And old Dr. Locker, he just started laughing. And he said, ‘Well, hell, Stella, if you’re going to name her after the month, why don’t you call her Texas June?’ And my mother went with it.”

Ms. Smith is but one of many Texans and former Texans named Texas. It’s not their nickname but the formal name given to them by their parents that appears on their birth certificates, IDs and, in some cases, obituaries. Texas Elmer Jones, for example, was born in Anona, Tex., fought in World War II and later moved from his namesake state to South Carolina, where he died in 2013 at age 89.

Texas is a powerful word, and its power is magnified within the state. Attaching those two syllables to all manner of things--and people and creatures--lends them a certain authenticity and Texas-ness.

That slice of bread isn’t just toast. It’s Texas Toast. That song on the radio isn’t just country. It’s Texas Country. That creature isn’t just a toad. It’s a Texas Toad, also known by its not-as-catchy scientific name, Anaxyrus speciosus. That lavender plant isn’t just a shrub. It’s a Texas vervain.

None of the other states I’ve lived in had such a hold on its residents that people felt compelled to name their children after it. People like Mr. Jones and Ms. Smith are proof that the mythology of Texas has a very real influence on Texans’ lives, shaping their identities in ways that few states could ever claim.

“Why not give a baby the ultimate name?” said W.F. Strong, an expert on Texas folklore and a professor at the University of Texas Rio Grande Valley in Brownsville. “After all, what do Texans admire and cherish more than Texas herself? If I ever have another son I think I will name him Texas: Texas Strong. There would be a lot of fun in normal parenting. ‘Texas, why can’t you behave?’ I can hear the kid saying, ‘Have you read my history?’ “

I wanted to get to know Texas, so I invited Ms. Smith to lunch.

We met one recent afternoon at Elmo’s Grill in West Columbia, Tex., a short drive from her home in nearby Sweeny, a town nearly 70 miles south of Houston. One of the first things I wanted to know was whether it actually said Texas on her driver’s license. She seemed to expect the question, and quickly displayed a Texas license that read “Smith, Texas June.” When your first name is Texas, it turns out, you get used to pulling out ID.

“When I was younger, I don’t know how many times I’ve been called a liar,” said Ms. Smith, who lived years ago in Massachusetts. “People were very rude, especially when I was up North. My husband was in the service and every time I would go to a doctor’s appointment or something like that, they’d say, ‘Your last name?’ And I’d say, ‘Parker,’ at that time. And they’d say, ‘Your first name?’ ‘Texas.’ ‘Lady, I want your first name, not the state you’re from.’ ‘Sir, my first name is Texas.’ And they would just argue with me like I’m lying to them. I would get so frustrated that I would just pull out my ID and lay it on the counter and say, ‘Would you just take it off here?’”

Ms. Smith has short reddish-brown hair, a slight raspy twang and, appropriately enough, a no-nonsense approach to life. The doctor who suggested the name, the late Dr. S. Braswell Locker, a native Texan himself, would no doubt have been proud.

Ms. Smith calls herself a country girl. She was raised on a farming ranch and started driving a pickup truck at the age of 5 or 6, using the blocks her father put on the pedals so her feet could reach. “I’d pick up Daddy’s .22 and I’d go hunting by myself, or I’d pick up the old cane pole and I’d go fishing,” she said of her childhood. “I’m me and that’s all you’re ever going to make out of me. I am who I am.”

At one point in her life, when she was in her 20s, Ms. Smith considered changing her first name. But she never seriously pursued it. “I would never disrespect my mother,” she said. “She gave me that name. The doctor gave me that name. I’m not changing my name. I got to go with it.”

Ms. Smith, who is now widowed, had a total of eight children. “When I was in Massachusetts, I was pregnant,” she recalled. “My sister, she was living here in the state of Texas, and she said, ‘Can I name the baby if it’s a girl?’ I wrote her back and I said no. J.C., my brother, was going to name the baby. And she said, ‘OK, but I got to tell you what I got picked out. If it’s a girl, I want you to name her Massachusetts July.’ I thought, ‘Oh, my God.’”

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