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hedgehog-moss · 2 days

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In my neverending quest to keep Pampérigouste from achieving her dreams, I have launched a formal investigation into her last escape, which I had no explanations for at the time.

I figured it out! At the far far end of her pasture, near the road, a few fence posts have become more or less horizontal (the ground is quite wet / muddy there so they've never been very stable, especially with Pirlouit using them to scratch his forehead)—so instead of a high jump + long jump combo to get to the road, Pampe just had to clear the long jump over the ditch. Which is still impressive.

I also suspect that she chose to escape from this place near the road on a snowy morning as a deliberate strategy, knowing the snow plough would erase any traces of her jump, thus preventing me from discovering where the weak spot in the fence was. Well done.

You need 2 people to fix these fence posts so in the meantime I decided to kill two birds with one stone: cut all the broom and thorny bushes in this corner of the pasture and use them to form a discouraging barrier. I set to work earlier this week, and here's the same place as above, mid-process:

When I texted my mum to tell her about my new thorn-based anti-Pampe plan of action, she said "Like the Maasai who make fences with thorny acacia branches to keep out lions!" and it made me feel even more confident. I mean, I have neither acacia nor Maasai fencing techniques but my thorny shrubs are pretty aggressive, they pricked my fingers even through my thick work gloves—which felt satisfying in an anticipatory way. Excellent! prick Pampe's nose exactly like this. How could a llama not be deterred by a fence material that deters apex predators?

Vexingly enough, she seemed quite supportive of my efforts. At one point she breathed some warm air against my shoulder in a gentle, patronising way.

We were engaged in psychological warfare all afternoon—every time I stepped away from my vegetal fence, feeling like it was now good enough, Pampe would immediately come to inspect it, cheerful and impatient, which sapped my confidence so I would go and add a few more shrubs. (Note that I sort of plaited the first / biggest shrubs with the pre-existing fence so they don't go flying on the road, and so Pampe can't just push them aside.)

On the right: Poldine, looking for little fresh leaves to eat amidst the chaos. On the left: Pampérigouste, thinking.

(At this point the barrier was only 20% thorns, and 80% broom—the fact that she waded through it without a care and didn't prick her belly made me go and add more thorny shrubs, and pack them more densely)

It's kind of fun watching Pampe think, honestly. Can I jump over this? Do I have enough visibility? Can I eat my way to freedom (again)? But these shrubs are disgusting. Am I above exploiting my daughter's lack of culinary discernment to achieve my goals? Maybe I should go back to my calculations re: probability of wild boar destruction. I may have pincushions for hands after handling prickly bushes for two hours but I'm helping stimulate my llama's intellect and creativity and that's so important.

I tried to alternate broom and thorny branches so that the non-thorny broom became tangled up with thorns and brambles to form an impenetrable and incomprehensible wall. I will call it this method the salmagundi-fence.

Poldine is in awe of my vegetal installation.

Can I just say, compared to Pampérigouste who constantly has a devilish glint in her eye, Pampelune's face exudes wholesome politeness and moral goodness. It's still hard to believe they're mother and daughter.

I went home once my fence started looking like Maleficent's forest of thorns and Pampe had long stopped trying to wade through it, but I still felt antsy and ended up coming back one hour later to have my apéritif with the llamas so I could keep an eye on Pampe until nightfall.

... where is Pampe?

Oh. Here. No worries!

Still staring at the road. Still thinking.

...

With all that said, please admire my beautifully delirious Forest of Thorns-fence and let me know what you think.

#crawling along #llama drama #(i am not sponsored by kindle i just had it balanced on my knee)#in the photo where pampe is patronisingly praising my efforts you can see a remnant of the police tape from the jungle fence saga!#i should remove it. She was not intimidated by police tape for very long #if ever at all #anyway i've started planting a few interesting shrubs along the road to form a living fence but it's a very slow process #i'm ages away from reaching this part of the pasture

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smelliewilliams · 16 hours

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━━ for the first time

pairing : ellie williams x fem!reader

warnings : used of yn & she/her prns for r (sorry), ASS WRITING & ENDING EUWEUWUEWUEW, not proofhead & i also write this at 3 am till 5 am lol, i have another vision in my mind but i js couldnt write what i have in mind..... so bear w me

dividers : @idontgetanysleep

DAILY CLICK

DONT BUY TLOU

WAYS TO HELP PALESTINE

It's been years since both you and Ellie broke up, it was her decision.

The two of you were still young and naive, you two were fourteen and Ellie had to go.

"I guess this is it," said Ellie as she fidgeted with her fingers.

"Don't say it like that, who knows we can see each other again in the future" you tried to say excitedly, but deep down you knew this might be it.

This might be the last time you two see each other.

But you have hope that she won't be gone forever.

Your eyes start to get blurry because of the tears well up in your eyes and Ellie pulled you in for a hug, that didn't last long.

You remembered the warm embrace of Ellie's hug. You had felt like you wouldn't let go and were hesitant to let go herself. Ellie looked at you for the last time, she remembered thinking how beautiful you were at that moment.

You let your hair down and you wore that ugly sweater of hers, that she had given you before.

But that was a few years ago, now you're twenty-four and alone in Jackson.

You went to Jackson a year after Ellie left Jackson to live somewhere else for peace. You worked as a teacher during the day and would help heal and clean the wounds at night.

Everybody adores you.

Why wouldn't they? You are you.

It was a cold, dark and windy night yet it was filled with waves of laughter and joy by the residents of Jackson.

There was a party that night, everyone was enjoying themselves and welcoming the new people but somehow a pair of green eyes caught your attention.

Could that be her? You thought to yourself.

You shook your head to get the thought of your head but it didn't work like that so you insisted on another drink and a night walk to get a breather from all of these overwhelming feelings.

"YN!" Maria yelled out your name while she gave you a big smile.

"Come here! I want you to meet someone" she continued saying.

You smile at her as you take the drink from the bartender guy and walk towards her.

As you walk towards her, you swear you've seen that girl before but where could it be?

"YN, this is Ellie. Ellie, this YN" Maria exclaimed.

Ellie?

"Hey, uh I'm Ellie," she said nervously as she stuck out her hand for you to shake it.

"Hi, as you know, I'm YN" you shyly smiled at her and shook her hand.

She smiles at you back.

"YN, she used to live here back when she was probably 15? or 14?" explained Maria.

"I'm so glad that you're back, Ellie" Maria gave a pat on Ellie's back.

"Oh, and YN, I hope you don't mind that she's living with you now" she informed you with apologetic eyes.

"Oh, it's fine I'm dying to have a roommate anyway," you said jokingly.

"Come, I'll show you the way to our home" you lead the way.

Home, home, home.

Ellie craved that, home.

As you two walked out of the bar, you looked at the sky. It was dark and cloudy and somehow you could see the moon glistening, hanging from the sky.

Ellie noticed you were shivering and she looked at what you were wearing.

You noticed Ellie eyeing your sweater - the one she once gave you years ago

"So... What was the occasion for the party?" Ellie asked as she looked at you.

"Oh, it was not much really, just welcoming the new people which by the way, welcome back" you answered her.

Ellie let out a faint 'oh, thanks' and you two walked in silence until she just couldn't help but blurted out how familiar you were, to which you replied "Do I, now?" to her with a playful tone.

"Yeah, she was my first love and the most beautiful girl I had ever seen" Ellie confessed and you just stood there and listened to her.

"Tell me more about it, if you want of course" you softly said to her.

"You know, I used to have the exact same sweater as yours but she liked it so much that I just let her have it and also, because, I want her to remember me."

"I want her to remember that I was in her life, at some point." Ellie continued.

"And what if I told you that she remembered you, all too well?" you questioned her.

Ellie was shocked, you could see it in her eyes when all the dots were finally together.

You are her, the girl she thought was the most beautiful.

You're her first love.

And you are here, with her.

With Ellie.

And you are still as beautiful as she saw you for the last time.

"It's so weird seeing you wearing that sweater. It's like seeing you wearing it for the first time, again." Ellie murmured.

As Ellie spoke, you felt your heart skip a beat. You try not to look at her to hide the blush that creeps up on your cheek and chuckle, "I love wearing it because it reminds me of you, and all the fun times we had together and also it keeps me warm".

"Did it? You were shivering" Ellie let out a laugh.

"Maybe you should give me a hug to warm me up," you said smugly.

"Maybe I should" Ellie smirked as she pulled you by your belt loops with her index finger before pulling you in for a hug.

REMINDER !!

that neil is a zionist and therefore dont buy his games, doesnt matter remastered or not !!!

before you leave, have you DONATE TO PALESTINE today? ITS FREE TOO !!

#written by dayana ❦#I HATE THIS EUWWWWWWWWWWWW #this did NOT do it JUSTICE BVROO #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x y/n #ellie x reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #ellie williams drabble #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams imagine

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inspector-m3 · 3 days

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One Piece headcannons, reader with allergies.

I have a desire to write but the ideas are moving to fast in my head lol. My requests are open and I can write full stories/oneshots not just headcannons. I promise i dont bite :]

CHOPPER

(This one is intended as platonic because, well...bros a reindeer.)

You got incredibly lucky finding this guy, no matter what time you joined the crew. Since chopper is a doctor he definitely feels like a blessing. As soon as he found out about your allergies he started his research (if he didn't already know about it). Finds a cure or a medicine to help with the symptoms and reactions for your allergies. This precious doctor even warns the other crew about what you can't have near you.

In return for his kindness you are now his designated hiding spot for when shit goes down.

LUFFY

He was definitely curious as to why you were constantly taking medicine or having to stay with chopper since you were unwell. Eventually he just outright asked what was wrong with you. He didn't get it at first but once he did he responded with...let's say an interest?

He loudly makes sure that whenever everyone's eating that the food (if you're allergic to a food) is nowhere near you, but let's be honest he probably eats it before it gets even a metre from you, saying something like "I was just keeping Y/ N safe!" when someone complains about their food being stolen. However, if you're allergic to a specific animal or item he makes sure it non-existent on his ship.

NAMI

Just like luffy she makes sure the allergen (the thing you're allergic to) is nowhere to be found. Since you mean so much to her she'd be willing to part with some money to pay for medicines or doctors if chopper couldn't help (luckily for nami thats a rare chance).

sorry this ones so short, I've never really written anything for nami before.

SANJI

If you have a food allergy this man is catering to your every need, making new recipes or even a completely different dish to the rest of the crew if needs be. Oh, you like spaghetti but you're allergic to pasta? Bam, special pasta you're not allergic to, just for you. He can and probably will fight luffy to keep him away from your special food.

If youre allergic to something that isn't food his dramatic ass would probably follow you around in new places to make sure it's not anywhere near you. (and if this gets annoying just give him a compliment, he'll pass out from blood loss and leave you in peace)

USSOP

When you're allergies are bad and it leaves you bed ridden, sniffling or coughing, he'll tell you stories just like he did with kaya. You'll be laying in bed, cursing your allergies while trying to not break your ribs from laughing at ussops silly tales. He always makes you feel much better.

ZORO

He probably didn't even know what an allergy was lmao. Maybe he thought it was some sort of pest (close enough)

If youre allergic to food we already know sanji will be making sure you're safe but zoro is definitely jealous that he can't do anything about it....unless.... if you guys are on a new island and you're not sure if your food has your allergen in it, zoro is the first to offer his help (well, it was luffy first but we all know what would happen).

If your allergen isn't food, just like sanji, he's following you around but he's definitely more of a silent protector compared to sanji. A plant you're allergic to in your path? not on his watch, it's cut down before you can even think of how to get around it.

Let me know if you have any tips or if there's any mistakes!

#x male reader #x reader #headcanon #one piece #one piece headcanons #zoro x reader #sanji x reader #ussop x reader #nami x reader #luffy x reader #tony tony chopper #roronoa zoro #sanji #monkey d. luffy #one piece nami #ussop

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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 1 day

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What if that night in Godric's hollow Lily chose to let Voldemort kill Harry and stepped aside when Voldemort asked her to?

Self-preservation kicked in! No one knows how they will react facing death. She should not be blamed for protecting herself.

Would she be honest and tell people what really happened or make up some believable story? What would happen to her after that night? Does she leave England? How would the Order/Sirius/Dumbledore react to the events? Would Severus go after Lily and tell her he is her hero? Would this be a better AU for Lily and the wizard world?

Woof.

Well.

It's not good.

Would She Be Honest and Tell People What Happened?

We don't really know much about Lily's character is the thing. I make a lot of things up for my own benefit, but that's my taking and running with the very little we see in canon.

We really don't know how she'd react.

The way I characterize her? Feeling guilty over her husband's death (who died for her and Harry) and the fact that she survived her son (who she perhaps could have protected) she'll confess to what happened. She wants people to blame and hate her so she can punish herself for this.

And judge and punish her they do as this is something the Order and the greater public just can't understand. I'm sure rumors of how and why Lily was spared also fly and soon Lily goes from the truth of simply stepping aside (and being spared because of Snape) to having slept with Voldemort to save her life to being his spy the entire time.

What Would Happen to Her After that Night?

The gossip against her is massive and I imagine the Order never quite trusts her again. They may not kick her out, though I'm sure some (certainly Sirius who is mad with grief over James's death) vote for it. Lily may leave of her own free will out of guilt and so as not to give the Order a black eye.

The Prophet may or may not run smear campaigns against her both to distract from the realities of the Ministry not managing anything against You-Know-Who and because this is such a shocking awful story.

Lily becomes persona non grata but is presumably left alone by the Death Eaters as Voldemort chose to spare her life and the order has been passed down through the ranks (and as Voldemort is alive he keeps Bella and the Lestranges and Barty in check in a way he didn't at this point in canon).

Lily lives a miserable life in which her husband and son are both dead, she's of no help to the cause, and she's trying to get on with it.

How Would the Order/Sirius/Dumbledore React?

See above but I imagine ostracization.

Sirius would never forgive Lily for James having died and Lily just selfishly allowing Harry to be killed. I imagine he'd blame her in his mind and believe that she had betrayed James personally by doing this. Not to mention what kind of a person/Gryffindor steps aside to let her baby be murdered?

The Order at large would likely have mixed opinions but the Weasleys for example would vocally condemn Lily and despise her for this.

Dumbledore would, I imagine, think much lesser of Lily and start saying things he says about Merope about how Lily just didn't love her son enough/wasn't a very strong woman. He wouldn't condemn her quite as much as Sirius or Molly but there'd be an undertone of "this happened because you are weak".

Would Severus Go After Lily and Tell Her He's Her Hero?

Severus is home free, you bet your ass he does.

Lily's probably out of the Order, James Potter his greatest enemy is dead, Sirius is out of the picture because of James's death, even the hellspawn Harry Potter is dead and out of the way.

They can now go back to exactly what they were and the Dark Lord did hold to his promise after all (and oh dear god Severus betrayed him behind his back, hope he doesn't find out about this).

I imagine Severus would try to reconnect and either:

lie about being a Death Eater entirely (probably won't work)

say he's realized the error of his ways, admit to giving the information to Dumbledore to save Lily's life, but he can't leave the Death Eaters because of the mark/he'll certainly be killed

Probably he goes with option 2 as he can't exactly pretend he never held his views or wasn't a Death Eater at all and he firmly believes that he took this huge risk, saved her life, and he's completely redeemed now.

Would This Be a Better AU for the Wizarding World and Lily?

Well.

Lily's son and husband died horribly, she's haunted by survivor's guilt forever, all her friends hate her and she's completely isolated, Snape is back on her doorstep believing she should be grateful to him for his actions and he deserves instant forgiveness, and the Dark Lord is still alive and well, has the future minister's son in his pocket, has infiltrated the government completely, and can take over any time he pleases with one out of two prophecy children dead (and Neville... probably doesn't last long after this).

So.

No.

It's better for 0 people.

It's actually much worse for everyone except Tom.

Tom is enjoying not being a wraith in Quirrel's head, thank you very much.

#harry potter #harry potter meta #harry potter headcanon #lily evans #severus snape #anti severus snape #sirius black #anti sirius black #albus dumbledore #anti albus dumbledore #the order of the phoenix #anti the order of the phoenix #meta #headcanon #opinion

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kvtnisseverdeen · 13 hours

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This is my humble take…

Joe Alwyn was Taylor’s best boyfriend. She knows this and her fans know this. But he demands actual work and accountability. Taylor is a white rich conservative girl first and foremost. And she’s very narcissist. Joe is the first boyfriend of hers to put actually limits on how her public personal affects him and their relationship. And she liked dating him at first because he was private and reserved and she was desperately trying to scape the industry and she found the most non-industry British man ever. She liked that security and knowing he didn’t attract that much attention. Then, she slowly gained her reputation back on track and realized that she could finally go back to being the person that plays for the media again. And yes, maybe her relationship with Joe was slowly fading — it happens a lot. But she clearly says in her lyrics that wanting to be shown off in public is one of the reasons too. Because she likes that every relationship she’s in gets consumed by her fans and the media.

And Joe Alwyn required her to go and do some work on herself! He comes from a very activist family. He was the one that made her be more open about social activism. It was because of him that she tried to do the bare minimum like encouraging during elections, have more racially diverse people on her music videos and tours, and do a very cringey job at supporting lgbt rights. But it was at least something…

Isn’t funny that the moment they broke up she went back to being very problematic? The climate terrorist that she’s been for the pass year and then wanting to sue people for spreading her private flights information (knowing this is public information). Then dating that racist man that mocked woman of color and admitted to watch what he did, being quiet about the war that’s going on, and the lame and immature issue she created over some of Olivia Rodrigo’s songs (a literal new artist and teenager at the time) to the point she cut total ties with her and her next man being a very typical conservative macho man that seems to love the attention just like her. She’s back at being who she’s always been…

“Your integrity makes me feel small” Yes, Taylor, indeed. I am glad you know this too.

oh you absolutely have said it all. this is extremely well said and on point.

i find it so odd that most swifties can't pinpoint that the real issue between joe and taylor was taylor once again giving into the industry and being a rich white capitalist which is something joe is not and does not want to be, and most likely caused the demise of their relationship. taylor herself has said this in her songs (like the lyrics in peace, as you said). so yeah, maybe she wanted marriage but joe probably wasn't comfortable marrying someone who had completely different morals than him which is his right. let's be real here.

and oh the relationship between her and travis probably set her "redemption arc" far back than ever. she really was finally speaking up on so many matters and now she's dating a problematic trump supporter, giving into the media frenzy with the NFL, and has done no activism despite having the biggest platform. i think what sucked the most was her being times person of the year and using it to talk about travis and how she wasted 6 years of her life being private. so disappointing. and the cherry on top are some of the lyrics from ttpd (ex. 1830s racism lyric) like WHAT?

another thing swifties misinterpret is that no one would've known joe if it wasn't for taylor and that he's living off of his songwriting credits from folklore/evermore. joe who is notoriously low-key and has stated he just wants to be seen as human never used taylor for clout and has avoided saying her name in interviews, even after the break-up. not because he didn't love her, but because he did not want to feed into the media frenzy. and if all eyes are on him, he's using it to make a statement about palestine which is amazing. sure, you may not have known joe alwyn if it wasn't for taylor but he never used taylor's fame to make him more famous. and might i argue, it was taylor who despite releasing positive songs about him sometimes didn't defend him (like in the folklore sessions where jack antonoff was obviously being rude to him? or how she told her fans not to go after john mayor releasing speak now tv but didn't say anything for joe when her fans have been harassing him like crazy?)

on the other hand, we have travis kelce who has most definitely brought her up in every capacity like on his brothers podcast and let's be real, most of the swifties didn't know who travis was (i didn't!) unless they were football fans. we saw proof of that when NFL sales and viewership was significantly higher. so yes, travis is using her name for clout and feeding into the media frenzy. and then you have swifties saying he loves her and supports which yes, can be true, but you cannot deny that taylor and travis' relationship fed the media, fed the NFL, and diverted attention from more important issues like gaza. and while taylor and travis had their eyes on them, they didn't use it to do any good.

so yes, you are right. joe was taylor's best boyfriend.

#joe alwyn #taylor swift #answered #anonymous #travis kelce #ttpd

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waywardangel-wilds · 22 hours

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Prompt Suggestion by @triassictriserratops:

Peeta sees Katniss in a baking apron for the first time and loses his SHIT. 13 year old Peeta is screaming inside him. He has to, like, sit in the walk-in for a bit. Do some breathing exercises. This is BEFORE "so after" so the pining is still PEAK.

"Okay, so I think we still need to do something about the sign, so ignore the logo." Peeta was saying as he unlocked the door. "But other than that, I think this is it. I think I'm happy about the colors."

Katniss smiled at him but didn't say anything, following him into the newly built bakery. His nervous energy took up physical space, like an additional person standing with them in the room. He watched her head towards the front windows, smiling at him with that heart-stopping gaze when she caught his eye.

"It's perfect," she reassured him.

"You really think so?" He scrubbed a hand against his curls. "Because you can tell me, we have time to fix any issues."

She shook her head. "Where do you want me?"

His mind briefly jumped into the gutter before he pushed the thought away, "Uh-- here's fine. The paint is right there." He pointed towards the other side of the room. "Oh! I got you something." He turned, jogging towards the kitchen doors. "So you don't mess up your clothes!"

"Oh, that's okay-" she started, but he'd already returned with an apron in hand. She took it, looking at him with an indulgent light in her eye.

"So what are we doing, boss?" she asked.

"I was thinking we could do the strip of color all along the bottom; the rest we paint white." He bent over to pick up a paint can while Katniss wound up her braid into a bun. "What d'you think?"

"It's your bakery, Peeta."

He looked up at her, a sincere look to him. "But- I mean, it's kind of ours... right?" He yanked at the lid of the paint can a little too roughly with his flathead.

"Um, yeah." Katniss fumbled with her apron strings, and her face suddenly became very warm. "Yeah. Ha. Um, so, is it Mellark's and Everdeen now? Or Mellark's and co.? I don't think your sign is big enough for either."

"Whichever, if you want, I'll make it work." He replied.

Katniss giggled a little strangely. She wasn't the type to giggle. She cleared her throat. "Uh, no, I'm just joking."

"Oh, okay." Peeta poured some of the paint out onto the pan. "Well, it's our bakery, you helped me build it, so." He shrugged. "Free bread for you."

Katniss smiled down at the back of his head. "Even the Danishes?"

"Especially the Danishes." Peeta looked back up at her with a cheeky smile. His eyes rolled downwards, settling somewhere along her waist. "I mean, uh, who else gives me free berries? It's only fair."

Katniss bent at the waist to pick up a paintbrush and Peeta audibly gulped. "If you say so."

"Mmhmm," Peeta said mindlessly, so very grateful Katniss had those stretchy pants. So eternally happy she was wearing them. So worried about the state of his own pants. "Um, would you give me a minute? I think I left something in the kitchen."

Katniss looked at him over her shoulder, her paintbrush dripping blue paint onto the floor. "Okay."

Peeta leaped to his feet, and in four quick strides, he was in the kitchen, leaning against the cool door on the still non-operational walk-in fridge. Deep breaths.

He felt insane. He hadn't been this horny for Katniss since he was thirteen. But lately, everything she did, anything she said, it just got him going. He was back to furiously rubbing one out in the bathroom like he used to when they had gym together in eighth grade. She probably thought he had constant diarrhea or something equally disgusting.

But, God, she was so beautiful. How was he supposed to just behave when she was standing there with that apron tied tight around her waist? Her hair, up in a bun, so he could look down her shirt? Wearing yoga pants so he could see her perfect ass?

He put his face to his hands, lightly slapping himself to calm down. Haymitch, dead puppies, Haymitch, dead puppies. He repeated his non-sexy thoughts mantra to himself, trying to get the image of Katniss's full lips out of his head. She would look so good kneeling in front of him with his--

DEAD PUPPIES!

"Peeta?" Katniss pushed the kitchen door open and looked at him with concern. "Are you okay? Episode?"

The guilt was crazy. He shook his head, "I'm okay."

"You're clearly not." She stepped forward, one of her hands settling on his shoulder, and the other pushing his away from his face. "Hey, what's going on?"

He shook his head. Thank god she hadn't noticed the tent in his pants. "I'm fine. So fine!" his voice sounded strained, even to himself.

Katniss's dark eyebrows came together. She wasn't buying it. Had he mentioned that he loved it when she frowned at him? He had a recurring fantasy of Katniss in a tight skirt suit, frowning at him from a tall desk, and telling him he'd have to do extra credit for his terrible math homework.

"If you say so," she conceded, taking a step away from him. When he didn't start following her, she looked back at him again. "Come. now."

Oh fuck. She was so damn clueless.

#everlark #peeta mellark #katniss everdeen #fanfic #everlark prompt #prompt #story prompts

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epickiya722 · 2 days

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Sukuna is Yuji's Biggest Hater... Or He Is??

Oh, he is. He definitely is. There is no doubt about that. Sukuna hates Yuji and has since the get-go. Yuji will cough and Sukuna will go "shut the hell up, brat". (Exaggeration, but you get it.) But why? Why does Sukuna hate Yuji so much?

But give me a chance here!! Hear me out, folks!! Just hear me out!!

Storywise, it makes sense that he would because hello! Yuji is the big good protagonist and Sukuna is the big bad antagonist. That's to be expected. I'm here for it. But let's not mind that!!

Now, here's me just rambling on. I have thoughts, folks, thoughts. I'm not saying I'm totally right on this. Just hear me out. So get ready for a long post!

(NOTE: I started writing this in January before 248 came out! So I added onto what was revealed in that chapter and onward to this post.)

(ANOTHER NOTE: I literally finished and posted this a minute or so before I saw the leaks for 257...)

Off rip, Sukuna no doubt despises Yuji's existence for the fact that Yuji is capable of keeping him contained. He was literally made to be Sukuna's vessel. A cage, if you will. It takes Yuji willingly to give up control, Yuji being fed multiple of Sukuna's cursed fingers at once or a Binding Vow for Sukuna to take control. Other than that, Sukuna is locked up, he ain't getting out. Do not pass go and do not collect $200.

Sukuna's first L of the series came at losing a mental battle against Yuji and no doubt that was a hurt to his pride.

But other than that, why else could Sukuna despise Yuji so much?

Well, I have a guess! Am I right about this? As I said, I'm not saying for certain.

But my guess is that Sukuna hates Yuji the most because he hates how he displays himself in battle. Better yet, Sukuna hates that Yuji isn't him.

Not only he hates that Yuji displays his strength in a humble way compared to others, but as 248 reveals Sukuna hates that Yuji keeps going despite Sukuna constantly trying to break him. I'll touch on that later.

You know the saying "your biggest hater is your biggest fan" or whatever? Yeah, that is Sukuna... maybe.

I'll clear this up because I know you probably went "HOW"? Okay, I touched on this in a post so I'll summarize it here.

Yuji doesn't do something that a lot of other characters do whenever they're out there throwing hands. Enjoying a fight and/or proving their strength. Yuji often fights not to show his strength, but he fights for others. Yuji doesn't think to show off his capabilities because it doesn't interest him to. Yuji isn't a prideful person.

Mind you, even before the cog mentality bit, Yuji already didn't think much of himself. He has called himself dumb at least twice. And, in a small moment, Yuji actually seemed shocked at Megumi's comment how of "adept" he is, almost as if he didn't think he was capable of such a thing even though since day one Yuji has been shown to being able to pick up on things fast with ease.

Yuji only feels weak when he feels he has failed someone. Wasuke told him that he's a strong kid and to help others. Ever since then, what all has Yuji has tried to do? Help others. It probably irritates Sukuna given that he is not someone who helps others, especially if it doesn't benefit him. He doesn't even like requests.

Sukuna probably hates that Yuji goes out of his way to sacrifice his life for people with the power he has when Yuji should be showing it off and enjoying a good fight just like he does. It's what makes Yuji boring to him.

Whenever Sukuna has fought someone (most of the time), it's a battle of "who is stronger" and he praises that person for showing off that potential. He even gets some entertainment out of it. There was even Maki, who wasn't fighting him for the sake to prove she's strong, who he praised.

But out of those he has faced, who does he constantly put down? Yuji.

Here's the thing. We know Yuji isn't weak. Sukuna knows this, too. He knows this firsthand because he has always been there. Sukuna, the King of Curses, was able to be suppressed by Yuji while possessing his body. He has seen Yuji show strength and speed that he was born with. He fought Yuji himself and within that first fight Yuji has managed to throw Sukuna off guard twice.

So Sukuna knows what Yuji can do. He just doesn't acknowledge it to Yuji. Instead, he chooses to call him "weak" and "boring".

But why? What is it about Yuji that really gets at Sukuna to constantly put him down like that?Again, 248 confirms Sukuna hates that Yuji has an unbreakable spirit. Yet, wouldn't that be something Sukuna be impressed by? Wouldn't he be impressed that Yuji's will is so strong that not even the King of Curses can tear it down? Let alone, why would he even care enough to acknowledge Yuji's unbreakable resolve at this point of the story and actually go out his way to be petty to try to break it again?

Why is Sukuna actually wasting his energy being pressed by Yuji who he deems weaker than him?

It's expected for the villain to be irritated by a hero's unbreakable will. But with Sukuna? Villain, he may be, he doesn't cross as the type to actually be that pressed about one person. Like, why does it matter that Yuji, this teenage boy who shares his mutual hatred, opposes him?

In a way, I believe that Sukuna hates Yuji, but also believes in his capability just in his own twisted way. He may, just maybe, sees Yuji as "the next Sukuna". Not in the sense of "I want an heir to live on my legacy" but in a "you should be like me, an epitome of strength and greatness".

What if Sukuna eggs Yuji on over and over to break him to eventually get him to snap and really show him a more bloodthirsty side? But one that he isn't angry on the behalf of others, but for himself? What if Sukuna wants Yuji to be selfish? What if Sukuna hates that Yuji has this unbreakable spirit because he wants to mold Yuji into his own image, and doesn't even know it himself yet?

We don't know much of Sukuna's past except how he was feared and worshipped through his reign of terror during the Heian Era. But what about before all that? Before he became the King of Curses? Or even after? What caused his death? Did he still have people who worshipped him?

We just know he was an "unwanted" child and he brushes that off. I imagine that during his time growing up, he learned how harsh life was and that shaped him into who he is today. He may be trying to project that onto Yuji. Wants Yuji to not be so naïve about how cruel the world is and doesn't deserve selfless people like Yuji. Treating him cruelly so that eventually Yuji becomes what he wants him to be. Just like him.

It's a crazy idea, I know, but anything can happen, I guess.

Sukuna chooses to not help Yuji and even if he does, he doesn't mean to. Earlier in the story, he reacts badly to being used as "a generator" against the Finger Bearer Curse, going as far as to killing Yuji.

[Thinking back on it, I find it intriguing and visual pleasing in storytelling that Sukuna tears out Yuji's heart. Not like I wanted Sukuna to do that! I actually freaked out! What I mean is, Yuji is someone whose actions are influenced by his heart than his head. Opposite of Sukuna who is a heartless monster and in battle, he tends to think with his head. In that scene, it was like saying such. Sukuna is a heartless monster while Yuji has a heart too big for his body. Moving on!]

The next time Yuji asks for his help with Junpei he laughs in his face and denies him that aid. After that, Yuji doesn't ask for Sukuna's help anymore.

Instead, he gets stronger and trains to rely on his own skills and prowess. Probably what Sukuna wants. He doesn't want to be used as some aid Yuji calls on whenever and at the same time, just maybe he wants Yuji to grow on his own the way he probably had to. He's helping Yuji become great without helping him.

Come the Shibuya Incident, this is where it gets interesting to me.

First, recall the fight between Choso and Yuji. We can see just how Yuji has gotten stronger. So strong that Choso did indeed have a hard time beating Yuji. Choso even remarks later after Shibuya how Yuji is like a "demon god" in chapter 139. This isn't him praising Yuji as a big brother. This is him praising Yuji as someone who has faced Yuji before. That was not an easy fight for Choso even though all Yuji fought with was his martial arts, wits, strength and speed.

"Kiya, didn't he lose that fight?" Yes (and some of you won't let that go). But, remember how Sukuna reacted?

He comments how he couldn't believe that Yuji lost to such "riffraff". That wording caught my attention because Sukuna would have normally said something like "You're pathetic, you're weak" or of the nature. He probably would have made a comment of how he expected Yuji to lose.

But he doesn't! Instead, his words are of disappointment that Yuji lost to Choso all while insulting Choso with "riffraff/inferior opponent" comment. Isn't that odd to anybody else but me?

Fast forward just a little to the final battle with Mahito! When Mahito confronts Sukuna for the third time, he tells Sukuna to shut up (and he wasn't even talking) and watch as he kills Yuji. And Sukuna gives him this look. It was smug. He was smirking. It's like he knows Mahito was talking a big game that he indeed did not win. It could be because he knows that at that point, Yuji wasn't going to stop until Mahito was dead. That he was at a breaking point.

(I also felt that Sukuna probably Sensed Kenjaku nearby. The thing is, if Mahito had succeeded in killing Yuji, it still would have been a lost to him somehow because Sukuna could probably just resurrect him again.)

A breaking point that Sukuna started. Let's rewind it back a bit to after Sukuna fought Mahoraga. Ah, yes. That moment.

When Sukuna switches back to Yuji to show off the destruction he did during the fight with Mahoraga. The memories of what Sukuna had done from killing the Hasaba twins, everything he did when fighting Jogo and finally Mahoraga. Once Yuji took in everything, he becomes distressed, nauseous, he falls into this state of self-hatred.

"... I an nothing but a murderer."

That scene is a punch to the gut. It was heartbreaking, especially to Yuji fans, huh? But there is someone who enjoyed it, undoubtedly. Someone who relished in seeing Yuji in such pain. Of course, it was Sukuna. We all know Ryomen Sukuna was basking in being the cause of Yuji's breakdown.

Something tells me that during that fight against Mahoraga, Sukuna realized just how destruction and death was happening around him and thought "Oh, I think the after results should be something for the brat to see"! And when he let Yuji see that huge black space void of life? He was laughing, he had to be.

I touched on this here, but I'm bringing it up here, too.

Yuji being aware of what Sukuna does and vice versa, Sukuna actually didn't have to bring Yuji right to that spot. He could have just switched back where he was and Yuji would have still known what he did. But, no. Sukuna had to be extra cruel. He had to show Yuji what he did front row and center. Almost as if he needed Yuji to see how cold-hearted and ruthless Sukuna is and maybe push Yuji to being just as cold-hearted and ruthless.

Take note of the lyrics of SPECIALZ, the song King Gnu written from the villains' POV. (Lyrics in the parentheses are translated by the music video.)

Shall we dance in the border of the death

Tokyo trenches in the metropolis

Shall we give it our all in between yes and no

Show me a hint of bad part inside of you

***

Let it all make a mess

Devour everything to your heart's content (Let's feast on the emptiness)

A lifelong labyrinthine rendezvous (Lost in the labyrinth of life, launched on this rendezvous)

To the point of dizziness (Losing my mind), "U R MY SPECIAL"

These lyrics reflect that scene. Yuji is brought to the border of a death scene, a place where many died. "Show me a hint of bad..." Yuji's reaction is the bad part of him that later shape into the Yuji we see for the rest of the arc. His words of "nothing but a murderer" kind of hint Yuji's later words to Mahito. How he'll keep on killing and killing curses. He won't take pleasure in it as it's just seems to be his role in this ongoing war between curses and humans.

"Let it all make a mess", definitely what it all was. A mess that affects Yuji hard. A mess that you could say makes him empty inside. "Let's feast on emptiness/Devour everything to your heart's content", Sukuna pretty does just that. Feasts on everything he chooses to both literally and figuratively. He devours on Yuji's pain and what if he wants Yuji to do the same? To just devour everything to satisfy himself. He had Yuji "feast his eyes" on the empty space.

Take note that in the anime, when Yuji is saying to himself to "die, die right now" his eyes are this red color. Sukuna's eyes are red. To me, that wasn't just Yuji telling himself to die, but also Sukuna, a bad part of him that he wanted to be rid of in the first place.

"Losing my mind", Yuji wanders from that scene as he constantly replays words he and others have said to him. He's in that state of confusion, lost and dizziness.

Now, these set of lyrics also could be Mahito's POV to Yuji. Mahito is a foil to Sukuna. They're both major antagonists to Yuji who mess with him. But in opposite, death isn't something Sukuna is afraid of while Mahito turns tail when it gets dangerous for him.

Let's rewind back to my previous point about the scene between Sukuna and Mahito. Yuji was at that breaking point and Mahito was going to feel that rage and lose against it. He would, and he does, become Yuji's victim. Again, in a twisted way it seemed Sukuna was proud of just knowing Yuji was possibly about to become a killing machine against Mahito.

I described in another post here that Yuji is a toy to Sukuna. In this case, the toy Yuji is to Sukuna is play dough. A modeling dough that comes in vibrant colors that children play with to mold into whatever they imagine.

Yuji is a play dough. He's being molded into whatever Sukuna wants him to be.

But why would he care to do that? Maybe it's a subconscious decision. That somewhere deep down inside Sukuna, a part of him senses that Yuji is that missing piece of him. Remember how twins work in JJK? Two halves of one whole.

It's why he acts and does what he does. He's incomplete and Yuji makes him feel less of such.

Well, I mention before in other posts... probably... but I believe in the whole reincarnation theory, I do. I think it's a fun idea. But! I don't mean Yuji being a reincarnation of Sukuna's twin. I do believe in that though. [As of now, that theory has been debunked.]

What if Yuji was a reincarnation of Sukuna himself?

Could it be that Sukuna may be "Yuji's biggest hater" because of the idea how your own worst enemy can be yourself?

That's really all I have to say for now.

***

Now I got something to add! As of 257, it's stated that Sukuna did indeed consume his twin in the womb (that bit I was right about) but Yuji isn't the reincarnated soul of that twin. It's his father, Jin Itadori.

But I still stand by my theory Yuji could be Sukuna's reincarnation via soul recycling or other means. Like, this whole time what if Sukuna was trying to shape Yuji into what he envisions because Yuji is him? Yuji is that piece of that's like... "what could have been". He's the good that Sukuna wants extinguished.

Simply, as it turns out if you apply the reveal of 257, Sukuna is like this cruel, evil "mentor" for his "nephew" that's he's looking out in his own weird, harsh way.

#just kiya's thoughts #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk spoilers #jjk manga spoilers #itadori yuji #itadori yuuji #yuji itadori #yuuji itadori #ryomen sukuna #ryoumen sukuna #sukuna #sukuna ryomen #sukuna ryoumen

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storiesbyjes2g · 23 hours

Text

3.104 Concerns

I woke up thinking about how bummed Sophia was about not being able to go to the beach in Tartosa. I mean, I was too, but it seemed to hit her especially hard. No one else I knew loved the water more than her—not even Yasmine, who declared herself a "water baby." I got a brilliant idea in the shower that was sure to make Sophia happy and presented it to her at breakfast.

"Let's go to the lake in San Sequoia. We can invite my dad and Alessia and make a family day of it."

Her eyes were as bright as Winterfest lights, and I gave myself a pat on the back.

"Yeeees, that's a great idea! Wait, your sister is still here?"

"Yeah. Apparently she's not going back. She wasn't as happy over there as she thought she'd be." I snorted at a new thought. "Plus, she probably met some loser here."

"Luca!"

"What? She's not exactly in the market for quality men right now."

"Still. You haven't met him yet and already labeled him a loser. It isn't nice."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Stop!"

I chuckled and reached for the phone to inform Dad about my plan, but he advised against it. A thunderstorm plagued the area, so once again, the weather dashed our beach plans. But Dad countered and suggested a family movie day instead, so we all braved the storm and headed to Anchorpoint Wharf.

I thought the movie was funny, but Sophia said it bored her, which surprised me, seeing as she was the token goofball of the two of us.

After the movie, we hung out at Dad's house for a bit. Alessia caught us up in her life, and just as I suspected, she had met someone; I knew her so well. Apparently, they met at our party. They were at the bar and noticed they were both doing the exact same thing. She had this weird ritual she did in restaurants where she wiped down glasses, utensils, plates, and whatever her mouth or food touched. He was doing it too, and they locked eyes. The way she talked about this dude was different. Usually, she didn't care to get to know the poor fellas on this roster, and we never got any details about them. But her tone was so giddy it intrigued me. Could he be the one to break down her wall? I knew my dad hoped so. He really wanted to walk her down the aisle.

I realized we hadn't heard from Sophia in a while, so I turned around to check on her. She had droopy eyes and a frown, and everything inside me wanted to panic. But she wouldn't want me to do that in front of them. When I found an appropriate place to make our exit, I took it and ushered her and the dogs back home. Once we made it inside, we settled in the office to talk. It seemed like all our important talks occurred in there recently.

"What's wrong?" I asked. "Are you feeling alright? What can I do??"

She shifted in her seat and looked everywhere except in my eyes, alarming me even more.

"I, umm... I'm concerned."

"About Alessia?"

"About getting pregnant."

My throat tightened, and I swallowed a few times to keep it open.

"Oh..."

Her confession lingered in the air like steam after a shower, and I wasn't sure what to say or do.

"I've taken a pregnancy test every day since the engagement," she said, still not making eye contact with me. "I know these things take time, but... It should have happened by now! My birthday is way too close, Luca. I'm running out of time."

I was in such a weird spot. I wanted to hold her and tell her to keep the faith, but this was bad news for me, too. She wasn't the only one looking forward to bringing a baby into the world. But it was her body going through that, not mine. And as much as it hurt to hear that, I still had a level of detachment she didn't have.

"Is there something we can do?" I asked. "I mean...is there...a test or something for that?"

Finally, she looked at me as if awakening from a trance.

"Yeah, actually. There is." She shook away those sad feelings and sprang into action. "I'll make an appointment right now. I guess I've been too flustered to think straight. I could have done this days ago."

She called her doctor and scheduled an appointment for the next afternoon. When she hung up, I finally embraced her like I wanted to and told her everything would be okay. I didn't know how true that was, but I had to believe it for the both of us.

#ISBI challenge #sims 4 story #sims 4 gameplay #adolting #adolting gen 3 #luca winston murillo #sophia aguilar #tw: fertility

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moshieee · 22 hours

Note

Hello it is I, random anon who does not know you and has never interacted with you before, what is your opinion of your mutuals?

Oh hi @bixell-pixell I'll include you even if we're not mutuals I think you're pretty chill all things considered

That's kinda it idk you that well

Anyways

You didn't specify so I'm going to list all my mutuals in the order of oldest to newest on my following page that I remember sorry of I missed anyone and for the @ s

*inhales*

@e-the-village-cryptid (I don't have a tag for e yet but it would probably just be E)

Not only the first person who I became friends with here but also the first one I ever started sharing my stories with, even if we don't talk too much I'm glad Every time we do and I see them on my dash, (they bring some of my favorite posts and when I do send posts sometimes I mix up and send them their own reblogs) I'm so glad we're still friends, thanks for letting me ramble about stuff for 6 hours hehe

@jaqofallgenders (no tag for jaq yet either)

my in person friend and the longest friendship I've ever had with someone, love you 🫶. I'll be more specific on Monday if our ADHD doesn't kick in and make us both forget

@strawberry-seal77 (seal-berry!!!)

Hi hi hi yellows my friend 👋 the person I consider to be the second ever friend I made on here, a lovely person as well and wait waaa and an amazing artist too 👀??? Love you silly goofball and the amazing posts and jokes you have we should chat more often I thinkith.

@rabid-mercenary16 (Rabid jumpscare)

Hey hey hey .... BWAMP! Hope you feel better soon

I probably have the most to say about Rabid but all try to make it a bit shorter. besides being the first artist to do art jokes and include me, with we also became mutuals and interacting around a time when my life started to get a lot better. Even if she's not the only factor in that I definitely associate her with stuff improving, and she did play a big factor in it (I already explained a lot on my Valentine's Day gift to her and the others). Also she's just an awesome person to spend time with and be goofy, amazing sense of humor and I just love being friends with such an awesome person and artist.

@dia-smthidk (Dia fren)

I'm assuming you don't want a bowl of soup

I also said a lot about them in my Valentine's Day gift, but we've become closer friends sense then even if we don't get to chat as much as I'd like to. I relate a lot and am surprised how we have so much in common. Amazing artist and person as well and I wish we could hang out more, idc if they think they're bringing down the mood when/if they bring stuff up about irl, and maybe I won't figure out their timezone but oh well, please take care of yourself gender sibling.

@bunnybunnsowo (BUN BUN BROTHER!!)

little brother 🫶🫶💝💞🫶✨👋❤️!!!

(I could have sworn we became mutuals before Dia?)

another person I shared a lot about with the Valentine's Day gift, I love you my little brother! Seriously one of the kindest people I've met and I'm so glad they have bug in his life. Bun deserves the world and they keep sending me opposum images!!! Gona die from cuteness and his kindness one of these days istg

@spookykittyzzz (greaah why don't I have a tag for you???)

A very kind person and artist I don't know too much sense we're not that close yet but love the few chats we have had so far. Hope we get to hang out more even if I'm awful at reaching out to others and saying hi.

@glitchyk (goop buddies)!!

Nooo the parallels

One of the first people who was interested to deep dive into my creations and ask about my stories and worlds They're probably competing with Rabid with how much I have to say about her/silly. Seriously it's incredible how much we have in common and now I get to share and collaborate our sonas stories together it's amazing. And as someone once said "you can yap for hours". I love how creative and clever they are, I just wish they would be kinder to herself. One day I'll make glichy see how awesome she is.

@unfunnyaceartist (Floridian disadvantage) I feel like I should change that

When I say I was shookith when ace asked to be friends I mean I was shookith first person so show up and ask that (the others kinda just happened). Amazing artist and don't believe her lies she is funny. I'm so heckn glad we're friends., love the goofy and silly idc if she's a bit of a simp they've helped me a lot start to understand slang and references I'm supposed to understand shhshsh (such is the curse of how I grew up) we need to make our mafia sonas interact at some point I can already imagine the chaos /silly

@neptunestoast (plushy slime)

Hugs hugs hugs*

Trying my best not to baby talk I swear. amazing person first person to show up and be like "hey I Wana do something for you and your friends". Love their humor and another gender sibling!!! Hugs for ever for as long as they're ok with it. I love their creativity as well and Noodle is so adorable. I just want to pick them up in a hug so much. Kibbity/silly

@ner5y (no tag woops ill figure something out)

What are you doing here??? How are we friends???

I was absolutely confused and startled when they followed me especially since it was during a spoons argument . Amazing artist like holy heck I wish I was allowed to curse on this blog. Their humor also took me by surprise when I got invited to the discord, and even if they doubt how well they're running it I think they're doing amazing. And I love our silly interactions like this one

@vexation-816 (chaotic ADHD buddy!!!)

Why did it take me so long to follow you istg

ADHD ADHD ADHD my buddy oh pal we both got that and it's driving us insane/silly. Love how creative he is and the ideas for his sona and character lore. Also one of the first people who shared a character they added to my nightlight au. This is getting twords the end and I'm tired of whiting so much and am on a timer oh no. But your amazing dude don't ever forget thag

@butlerbugbunny (anxiety bunny buddy)

This is why I didn't respond to the DM yet hshsh

New friend who I feel anxious talking to sometimes but a wonderful kind bunny who I'm also incredibly happy to be friends with. Love his art so much it's amazing (shoot shoot timer is going off) I'm glad he's their for bun and wish them the best I possibly can 🫶.

@lilithloves-you (lillith my be-loathed?) need to change that

Don't you dare bring up grilled cheese

Glitchys friendo who I'm also friends with now. We don't interact too much but I've sent her on missions to go hug glitchy (to help both of them feel better but shhh). I hope we become closer friends in the future.

#god this is a lot anyways im off to the store now #mutuals #E #seal-berry #Rabid jumpscare #bun bun brother #dia fren #goop buddies #Floridian disadvantage #plushy slime #anxiety bunny buddy #Lilith my be-loathed?

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kimmiessimmies · 2 days

Text

A Message From Joshua

"So yeah, hi, it's me, Josh. Remember me?"

"Probably not, right? I mean, it's been a while since our author wrote about me because she was too busy with everyone at the university."

"But hey, I'm still here, I'm now 15, and the upcoming chapter in A Taste of Honey is actually about me! Well, it's about me and Morgan."

"Oh, right, I should probably introduce her, too. Morgan is my best friend Joel's aunt. I actually didn't know her until recently, but Joel introduced us because... well, it's all in the next update. Here's a picture of her."

"Morgan is a writer. She writes books for children, teens and young adults and she's really good at that."

"Her latest children's book got chosen as Children's Book of the Year! It's a fantastic book for young kids; my sister Ruth loves it. It's about a boy, Ciaran, who has all these adventures with his cat, Paws."

"But the really awesome thing about her book is that Ciaran grows up in two households: one with his mum and the other with his two dads."

"Morgan based that on her own situation; she's co-parenting her son, Jonah, with two dads as well. I think that's pretty cool."

"If you want to know more about me and some of the things that happened to me before, here are a few links:"

December 06: Electricity

Spring 07: Coming Home

Summer 07: Becoming Joshua

"Oh, and lastly, if you now feel like our author is suddenly writing a different story; she claims that eventually it all connects, so go with the flow, I guess!"

#ts3 #the sims 3 #sims 3 #joshua edwards #morgan harrison

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akumicchi · 3 days

Text

𝔗𝔬 𝔟𝔢 𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔯𝔡.

112 prayers

A hopeful message with no destination.

You will never be too heavy for me.

Content: angst, breakdown, hints of depression. Suguru's POV. OC appearance.

I smelled it before I saw it. I felt it before I heard it; the presence, the humming. I had never entertained the idea of time travel. No one could actually predict a forced turn in the highway of time, even if Back to the Future made it look so comical. Despite that, I found myself basking in that presence, in that humming, and let it drive me off to when I was a child: innocent and safe.

“Mom?”, hoarse. Silence. A knot of guilt tightened itself up inside my chest. ‘Don’t go’.

“Sorry, did I wake you up?”, there weren't the walls of my room around me, no posters, no bookshelves nor pictures. In fact, there was no room at all. Just an open field I didn't know, somewhere I couldn't remember. I wasn't curled against my mother either. It was just Hogo, and it made me more at ease than expected.

Not being alert in a strange place was a punch to my instincts, but I couldn't bring myself to care aside from a simple:

“Where are we?”

“We’re at school. I carried you here, remember?”, oh yes. She and her stupidly strong arms. “You fell asleep though, so you probably don't”.

I did remember not wanting to come, earlier that day. The air had felt like lead for the entire … month?, weighing heavy on my lungs with each breath. Every layer of clothing was a tight rope made of rubber. It didn't matter how much I tried to fight the dark clouds, they only grew thicker and tighter. It was exhausting. It'd be way easier to just give into the misery. ‘Ah… everyone would be so disappointed to see me like this, choosing the easy way. But I can't carry this and pretend anymore’. So I hid from sewing fake smiles on my face. I just wanted to drown in the pain without witnesses.

Despite that, I let her in.

“C'mon, I want to show you something.”

“I don't really feel like walking anywhere right now”, it had been four days since Tsukumo Yuki talked to me on that very bench, and left me with more thoughts than I could manage. I needed quiet. “Maybe next time”.

Hogo crouched in front of me. Her voice was soft, the one she used when talking to kids. “Please, it won't be long, I promise. We go and then we come back. You will like it”, her eyes were clouded with worry, she looked pretty like that too, “You don't even have to walk if you don't want to”.

“Hmm? How come? You can teleport now, too?”, I cocked a brow, feeling the slight tug of a smile against my will. ‘The things she makes me do’. Her hands closed and opened for a second. She wanted to hug me, and the realization of this loud and clumsy girl being so mindful around me made my chest ache.

“Well, I'll show you if you agree to come with me”, she sang quietly with a spray of confidence.

I was so eager to get an answer to these haunting questions. Haibara’s response was as simple as his own mind. Tsukumo Yuki’s, on the other hand… It was complicated. Or maybe it wasn't? Maybe I had made my choice? But what if I was wrong? How could I know? What would she say? I wanted her thoughts, a piece of her mind to tell me…anything.

‘But not now’. The scent from her neck lulled my senses quiet. The tree leaves above our heads were kind enough to shield us from the summer afternoon. Hogo’s hand traced my skin, untangling my worries stroke by stroke. My legs were folded on her lap, and the vague memory of being cradled this way made me feel so innocent. Too warm to think. Too soft. Too comfortable.

She had a book propped up against my thigh. It was open roughly around the middle.

“What are you reading?”

“112 prayers at midnight”, she hummed, eyes not leaving the pages.

“That's an odd number of prayers”.

“Yeah. It's a story about a non-believer trapped in a time loop trying to save his loved ones after losing them to a mistake… He prays every time for the loop to restart.”

“For a non believer he surrendered fast… At least he has a second chance”.

Silence settled between us. A few seconds later she spoke again.

“Hum, I thought about that too, ‘To pray for time to go back, it's so unfair’. But as twisted as it is, I just can't stop reading. Maybe I'll be surprised”.

“Who’s that god that answers at the first call? That's a real surprise. I'd like to meet him”, that was a slip. My throat tightened and by no means I expected how broken I actually sounded.

Her arms held me closer. When she pressed her lips against my forehead, a sob almost broke through every wall I had built.

“Me too”.

Stop being like this. Don't hold me, don't carry me somewhere calm, don't kiss me so softly. Stop making me feel so small! I don't want the sun, I don't want the breeze, I don't want clouds, or words, or songs, or flowers; I don't want any of it!!

“Shh… it's okay, I've got you”.

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