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#not sure if these tags are registering lol
coquelicoq · 7 months
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what i like especially about the pronouns in the goblin emperor is that this language doesn't just have the T-V distinction (aka informal vs. formal second-person pronouns, in this case 'thou' vs. 'you'), it also has informal and formal first-person pronouns. having BOTH of these distinctions in the same language lets you fine-tune your tone by mixing and matching. with only one axis of formality, when you use informal pronouns, are you being familiar in an intimate way, or in an insolent or dismissive way? when you use formal pronouns, are you being polite or standoffish? you can't tell just from the pronouns; there's ambiguity. but a language where you can use a formal first-person pronoun in the same sentence as an informal second-person pronoun allows you to distance yourself (via the formal first) while also being familiar (via the informal second), thereby achieving the conversational tenor known to linguists as Fuck Thee Specifically.
#just kidding i don't know what linguists call that tenor. or any tenors. i'm not totally positive what a tenor even is#but i can't let that stop me from writing a jokey post on tumblr dot com#register is a very interesting area of linguistics that i know very little about#so i'm probably revealing the depths of my vast ignorance here to all the sociolinguists who surely hang on my every word#but i've always thought of the formal/informal pronoun thing as being about two things: intimacy-distance & rudeness-politeness#and of course you can usually tell from context whether a formal pronoun is meant to indicate distance or politeness#(plus distance and politeness are related to each other (to various degrees depending on culture))#but it seems like it would be cool to have a built-in alignment chart of sorts just for pronoun combos#instead of prep jock nerd goth...why not try intimate self-effacing polite superior?#the goblin emperor#pronouns#register#sociolinguistics#my posts#f#anyway i know i said i wasn't going to reread the goblin emperor...but guess what. lol#and i edited my tags on that earlier post but fyi the language DOES distinguish between plural and formal singular pronouns#i had said i thought it used the same pronouns for plural and formal but i just wasn't paying close enough attention#so anyway i just reread the part where maia is talking to setheris in formal first and informal second#and you can see setheris going ohhh shit. oh shit oh shit oh shit#i'm in biiiiiig trouble#you sure are dude. that's the Time to Grovel signal#it's interesting because at the very beginning of the book when i first saw the formal first used i just thought it was the royal we#because i knew the main character was supposed to be royalty#but then EVERYONE was doing it. so it's not the royal we it's just the formal we#however. this does make me realize that the way the royal we would function in a language that retains the t-v distinction#is the same way i'm describing here. it's just reserving that particular tone (i'm better than you and am displeased with you)#for royalty only. which makes sense given royalty's whole deal
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gio-cosmo · 5 days
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I’m taking some community college courses soon and istg if someone doesn’t see the fandom related stickers on my laptop and immediately become my lifelong bff I’m dropping all classes idgaf
#LMFAOOO IM JOKING OBV#likeeee persona fans flock to me please#persona fans out in the wild pls be my friend 😕#“out in the wild’’ I say in reference to the college campus 💀 I’m cooked#my honest reaction as I register for college after years of claiming I’ll never go to college 🤯#LMAOOO#I woke up last month with the random realization that writing is my lifelong passion that I’ve been avoiding fully delving into—#out of fear of failure#so this is what we’re doing now ig!#“Gio what about coding and game development?’’#well unfortunately coding makes me enter a state of misery every time I attempt it#so I’m putting that on the back burner for now#I’m not giving up on it by any means!! but I enjoy writing so much that it seems more sensible for me to pursue that at the moment#ANYWAYS#sorry for always rambling on here 😭 lol#my laptop is actually coveredddd in persona / chainsaw man / genshin impact stickers I’m lowkey embarrassed#I also have an Ib sticker but I’ve never seen like anyone talk about Ib unfortunately 💔#Ib fans where are youuuu#is it unprofessional to have ur laptop covered in stickers am I cooked 😕 idk how college works like at all#I’m so fucked oh my god. LMFAOOO#mfw I lack basic knowledge#I’m trying my best over here fr 😞😞#I ALSO HAVE MIKU STICKERS#can’t forget the miku stickers ofcccc#I’m sure you’re all really invested and interested in what stickers I have on my laptop#I mean this is world altering info. really crazy stuff#💀#someone take the tag feature away from me at this point
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collectivenothingness · 10 months
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Me when I am a liberal: yeah so what I am really concerned with is people abusing this law we agreed to pass when we joined this coalition... evil people could change their gender and name... maybe even to invade a female-only sauna... also we gotta like push on the breaks a bit, you know? uhm like this coalition is great and all and I am really enjoying kneecapping every social program we can but like after next election... we have to be buddy buddy with the conservatives and maybe the far right, soooooo... we don't wanna be too nice to these uh.. transsexuals...
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nickfowlerrr · 7 months
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Bucky Barnes and you get stuck in elevator for one hour. What are you two doing? 🖤 honest answers only even if they are filthy 🔥
stuck with you
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pairing: bucky barnes x curvy!reader
words: 2.4k
warnings: 18+ only. smut. angst. all the feelings. unprotected sex. hint of a breeding kink. some spanking. oh some very incorrect description of an anxiety attack and how to help someone through it. i know, i know, but it's for the story lmao. uhm if i'm missing something that should be tagged pls lmk!
notes: i couldn't not write something for this and it was gonna be so smutty and then i started and then i... i dont know what happened lol. but thank you for sending this in, i know it's not a direct answer but i hope you like it <3 thank you in advance for reading and as always, comments and reblogs are always welcome and so appreciated!
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"What exactly do you think slamming all the buttons will do?" he asked as he leaned against the wall of the elevator, nothing short of casual amusement lacing his voice as he watched you.
You ignored him, trying the emergency call button for the fifth time in the minute that had passed since the elevator stopped moving.
You didn't realize the change in your breathing until Bucky's hand came to rest on your arm. You flinched at his touch, having been too lost in your growing panic to notice he'd gotten closer.
"What?" you asked through a heavy, annoyed breath.
"You need to breathe, sweetheart," he instructed gently, tugging you to face him fully, pulling you away from the buttons as he did.
"I'm breathing," you snapped at him, forcing yourself to take a breath as you worked to steel your nerves. It was all in vain, though. You couldn't fight off the paranoid thoughts as they were coming through your mind too fast to even try and rationalize. "I just," you said shakily, "I ca- I can't,"
You suddenly found yourself nearly bowing over as you tried to catch a breath. Bucky helped you to sit while he kept his hold on you, his intent eyes set on you as your own squeezed shut, your hands mindlessly gripping his forearms as you tried to ground yourself.
"Look at me, sweetheart," he ordered firmly, though he waited patiently for you to follow his instructions.
You felt like you couldn't catch your breath, each one you took was too shallow and you couldn't manage to breathe in any deeper.
"Just hold your breath for a second, doll,"
You were still struggling, and the last thought on your mind was to stop breathing altogether, you were sure you'd pass out if you did. Your gasping was only growing worse as Bucky contemplated his options.
He didn't think long before he gently took your face in his hands and forced you to look at him, your eyes glassy and lips parted, desperate for air. had his heart clenching. He didn't want to see you like that, not with that fear in your eyes. He leaned into you and pressed his lips to yours, more fervently than he even meant to.
You were still against him for a moment, not moving as he pulled you closer to him. It took you a second to register what was happening. All at once, though, your mind caught up, your heart pounding in your chest only growing wilder as you let your eyes close, crawling into Bucky's lap as he held you gently, his lips still against yours. You were all together intoxicated by him, his soft but secure touch, the taste of mint and coffee on his lips, the scent of his cologne mixed with his shampoo from your shared shower earlier, it wrapped around you as your previous thoughts of peril faded into the background.
All that you could think of was him, here and now. And you in his solid lap, his thick arms wrapped around you, his hands holding your face so delicately. Your lips began to work with his as you breathed him in and let him taste you in kind.
You soon lost yourself to him completely; and then, after another long minute, you realized you once again couldn't breathe.
You broke the kiss, hungry for air just slightly more than you were for him. You let your face fall as your noses brushed and you finally were able to catch your breath.
"Huh," you huffed, suddenly remembering yourself. You peeked up at him through your lashes meekly before you murmured a soft thank you.
He smirked halfheartedly, but a little bit of sadness he couldn't hide was apparent on his face as you then moved to get off of him, not that you noticed. Your thoughts were once again getting caught in a spiral.
As you tried to move off his lap, you were stopped. Bucky held you down, his large hands gently squeezing into your soft waist, keeping you exactly where you were.
"I get you're still mad at me, sweetheart, but I'm not just gonna sit here and watch you spiral again," he said as he pulled you into him.
You slumped into his chest, letting your heaviness rest on him as you nuzzled your face into his neck.
"I'm not mad at you," you mumbled into his skin.
"Could've fooled me," he breathed a humorless laugh.
You sighed, pulling away from him slightly.
"I'm not mad. I'm just-" you cut yourself off before forcing your tongue to continue, "I'm scared."
Your eyes were glued to his chest as you spoke but the moment the admission slipped past your lips, Bucky was tilting your chin up to look you in the eyes.
"Sweetheart," he began.
"Not of you. Of me. I just... I'm not, I'm not used to this. To being loved, the way you love me. And I don't wanna lose that," you whispered as tears pricked your eyes. "I don't want you to end up feeling stuck with me. Because I'm a lot, Bucky. And I'm not easy to live with. I'm particular and I need alone time a lot of the time... and ... You just have no idea what you're inviting into your life."
"You," he said simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, his touch grazing your cheek as he wiped a tear from your skin. "I'm inviting you. I love you. I want you. All of it with you. Every last bit, doll."
You could see the sincerity in his eyes as he spoke and it only made you all the more worried.
"I'm not trying to pressure you, sweetheart. If you don't want to move in with me, you don't have to. If you need time, I'll wait. However long I have to," he said as his hands began to run up and down your back soothingly.
"I want to, Bucky. I do. I just don't want you to regret this."
"When are you gonna see it," he breathed as he squeezed you closer, looking up at you as he leaned back against the wall behind him.
"See what?"
"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I could never regret you."
"You say that-"
"Ever."
Your eyes softened at his insistence, and deep down, you knew he meant it.
Your avoidance of an answer to his question this morning had been you trying to protect not only yourself, but him from disappointment, though it was becoming clearer and clearer that it was only hurting you both.
You were scared, but you also wanted this just as badly as he did. God, how long you'd dreamed about the day you'd wake up in Bucky's bed and not have to rush to your own apartment to get ready for work. How nice it'd be to get home from a miserable day and have him there to make things better without having to endure the twenty minute commute from his place to yours. To share a place together, your and his...
You were near burrowing yourself in his embrace, his hands still soothing up and down your back as he held you close, when you reached to grab one of his hands in yours.
You pulled away from him enough to look him in the eye.
"If you're sure,"
"I'm sure,"
"And if you ever wanna go back on it, or change your mind, I -"
"I wouldn't,"
"But if you do-"
"I won't."
There was a moment, a silent conversation between you two as you look into each other's eyes. You pressed your forehead to his, kissing him delicately before you pulled back again.
You nodded, "I'd love to move in with you, Bucky," you said with a small smile playing on your lips. Your heart soared as you watched the dopey smile that stretched onto Bucky's face before he crushed you against him. "That's all I needed to hear," he said in between kissing you everywhere he could in the position you were in. You laughed as you wiggled to sit up higher on his lap, looking down at him.
You reached a hand to brush through his hair, and as you did the elevator jolted. You caught yourself with a hand against the wall as Bucky tightened his arms around you instinctively.
You felt his warm breath against the swell of your breasts before you looked down with a raised brow. His face was right against your chest, and his eyes were now locked on your breasts as they hung in front of him, his hands grabbing at your ass while his eyes grew darker, filled with even more excitement.
"Wouldn't mind if that happened again," he said huskily.
"Odds are in your favor, you know this complex is the fucking worst," you huffed.
"All the more reason for you to move in with me," he smirked. "But ya know one good thing about these old buildings?"
"Hm?"
"They don't have cameras in the elevators," he said, smacking your ass and causing you to gasp and jolt from the strike.
He was mesmerized by the sight as he repeated his actions over and over again until you were whining and pressing your chest into his face.
"Buck," you mewled pathetically, the tingling between your thighs growing more unbearably with every slap against your ass. Each hit only getting you more wet for him.
You were seconds away from ripping your tank top off yourself but Bucky quickly pulled it off and over your head for you before his lips descended upon your breasts.
You let your head drop back in time with your hips pressing to sit fully in his lap, a moan escaping you when you felt his hard length against you. Your hands were in his hair as his hands squeezed your ample flesh, his lips fervent against your skin still.
You couldn't help yourself as you began tilting your hips over his, back and forth, your movements more urgent the more you felt him twitch beneath you.
Your bra had been tossed to the side minutes ago but you were still in your leggings while Bucky was still fully clothed.
When you tilted your hips just right, you felt his cock rub against your clothed clit and you nearly lost it completely; shoving yourself off of him to finally rid yourself of the clothing that kept you from what you really wanted. Bucky followed your lead without having to be told and got undressed in the blink of an eye. You saw his throbbing length standing erect for you and nearly salivated at the sight, your mouth parted in awe at his beauty. You swear, you'd never get over it. Every little thing about him, from his scars to his own stretch marks, every bit of his was beautiful. And you smiled as you saw him admiring you the very same way, that wonderstruck look in his eyes you'd never get used to. Your patience was wearing down the longer you took, though, and quickly, you climbed back down into his lap before lining his cock up to your slick entrance.
You slowly sank down on him, moans from both of you filling the elevator at the sensation.
"Oh, fuck, doll," he moaned while groping your hips. You started moving up and down his length, slowly as you enjoyed the stretch of him inside of you, wanting to feel each and every inch of his thick cock as it filled you up.
"Mmm," you hummed a mindless moan, throwing your head back in pleasure as Bucky took a pert nipple into his mouth, squeezing and kneading your breast in his big hand. "Feels good, Buck," you breathed, slamming your hips down on his cock, earning a deep throated growl from him.
Suddenly his hands were back on your wide set hips, his fingers digging into the plushy flesh there as he began fucking up into you himself. You were helpless as you keened at the feeling, gripping his shoulders to keep yourself upright. "Oh god, Bucky, please," you whined, pushing your hips back down to meet his thrusts, "please, please, please,"
"You close, sweetheart?" he panted. "I can feel you gripping my cock, baby, fuck," his eyes squeezed tight as he nearly snarled the curse of pleasure.
"Gonna fuckin' fill you up and then you're really gonna be stuck with me,"
"Bucky," you gasped, though it came out with a moan.
"That's it, sweetheart, take my fucking cock, just like that, doll. Just like that," he punctuated each word with another snap of his hips into yours, rolling into you and rubbing your clit deliciously with his every move.
You were both panting, a sheen of sweat on both of you as he fucked you perfectly, the only other sounds to be heard were of your twin moans and the slapping sounds of skin on skin, the salacious squelching of his dick drilling into you over and over.
His thumb found your clit and drew tight circles over the sensitive bud as he felt your walls tightening around him, wanting to keep him inside of you. It was almost blinding, the way you were hit with your orgasm. Your muscles tightened as Bucky continued to fuck you through the high, unintelligible moans and whimpers of his name and cries intermingled as the waves of pleasure crashed over you over and over again.
You found yourself on your back in the blink of an eye as Bucky continued to pummel into your tight heat, deep strokes along your velvety walls as he chased his own high, holding himself above you as he did.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, I'm gonna come, baby, I-" his words turned into a deep groan as his pace faltered, soon morphing into heady moans when you felt his warm spurts filling you up as he came inside of you.
His thrusts slowed as did your breathing until he slowly pulled out of you, laying himself down next to you and pulling you into him. He kissed your forehead as you melted into his embrace.
"I mean it, ya know. You're the one who's gonna be stuck with me, sweetheart. I'm not goin' anywhere," he promised with a simper. "Not without you."
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sellenite · 5 months
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cherry blossoms 03 pairing: virgin!Choso x fem!reader contents: oral (m! receiving, sloppy, deep-throat, face-fucking), praise kink (lightly), dracryphilia, Choso is rough but still sweet, friends to lovers word count: 3.3K notes: DIRECT CONTINUATION OF 02! I pulled a crazy editing day (and night lol) on this series, so if you read the original part 2 and are now confused reading this one I am so sorry 😭 I will link the post where I explained the rewrite here: 🤡 but I hope everyone enjoys 🫶 tags: @tojicvmslut @vampress7 @venusinx @mochipip @matchafroggies724 @sabo-has-my-heart @serra10 MDNI | 18+
virgin!Choso whose lips parted in awe as he gazed down at you sitting on your knees before him. You had kissed your way down his torso sweetly, pulling up the hem of his t-shirt a little to press your lips against the bottom of his abs. He reveled in the softness of your lips as they explored more of his body, feeling like he was on cloud nine from all of the gentle attention you were giving him.
He watched you settle on the ground between his parted legs as he sat on the couch, the movie the two of you had put on long forgotten. You began to pull his sweatpants down his thighs and he thought for a moment that he shouldn’t feel so comfortable to be so exposed in front of you, to be so vulnerable. Yet, he had no reservations as he felt your delicate hands slowly remove his pants. When you asked him so sweetly if he trusted you, his answer was an obvious yes. He trusted you completely—with his mind, body, and soul—and he was ready to let you do whatever you wanted to him. And he could see the same tender affection he had for you reflected in your own eyes as you watched him, making sure he was comfortable every step of the way.
You couldn’t help but let out a small gasp as you lowered his pants more, revealing the heavy outline of his erection in his boxers, a dark stain of pre-cum already seeping through the fabric. He watched with curious, lustful eyes as you gingerly reached your hand out to stroke him over the material, feeling the thickness of his cock underneath your palm. He groaned low in his throat, his hips rolling a little as you teased him over his underwear, your hand lightly gripping his length as you gave it gentle strokes.
“Take them off… Please,” Choso begged with a light laugh, to which you returned with your own giggle and a nod. The need you felt for one another at this moment was palpable, yet the playful comfort of your relationship never faded. Choso lifted his hips as you tugged the waistband of his boxers down and they quickly joined his sweatpants around his ankles. His heavy cock sprang free the moment you lifted the material from his body, thick head standing upright against his stomach as it leaked. You blinked a few times as you took in the sight, almost intimidated as you registered how large he was.
virgin!Choso who saw your reaction and felt a moment of doubt, self-conscious fears suddenly racing through his mind. But then you took him so gently into your soft hands and that was enough to make his worries retreat. He let out a light gasp as he felt your hand wrap around his shaft, squeezing him so perfectly that it made his tip dribble even more. You took a moment to familiarize yourself with his cock, gently tracing the veins that ran over it and watching as the fluid started to spill down his pretty head.
His length was impressive, but what you found even more thrilling was how thick and veiny his shaft was. His skin was smooth to the touch underneath the pad of your thumb as you gingerly followed the prominent vein that spanned the underside of him. Immediately, he felt the difference between your hand and his; yours was so much smoother than his rough, calloused palms. Your touch was so delicate, yet so deliberate. Your thumb reached his head and you swiped over his drooling slit, causing his hips to twitch as he sucked in a breath, his keen eyes watching your every movement.
“You’re even bigger than I thought you’d be, Cho... And so pretty,” you giggled sweetly as you wet your lips with your tongue, tugging your bottom lip between your teeth in your excitement. He didn’t quite understand why being “big” was a good thing, but he could hear the wonder in your voice and it made his chest swell with pride that you were pleased with him; and that you thought he was pretty.
"Thank you," he whispered softly, watching as your hand intimately explored his body. You smiled up at him, your pretty eyes creasing in the corners the way he loved so much, but they were darker with lust now. You used your palm to gently stroke over his head, spreading his pre-cum over his shaft as you moved your hand back down in a fist. You began to grip his length with a little more pressure, using his fluid to slowly stroke up and down. He moaned your name softly, his abs clenching as you pumped him steadily and his body became increasingly eager for more. He watched with heavy-lidded eyes and parted lips as you inched your face closer to his throbbing length, holding the base of his shaft tightly in your grasp as you held his gaze.
“Let me make you feel good…” You said in a silken tone, and he watched, unblinking, as your soft lips drew closer to his flushed head.
virgin!Choso who let out a reflexive whimper as you stuck your tongue out to flick the point of your muscle delicately against the underside of his tip—teasing his frenulum. He let out a low moan as you kept teasing him like this, his body trembling lightly against the couch and his lips hanging open as his breathing became heavier. His cock twitched as he felt the wetness of your tongue working against his skin, playfully licking at all of the sensitive spots he didn't even realize he had. His hands shakily found your cheeks, his large palms tenderly cradling your face. You licked over his drooling head—collecting the faintly salted pre-cum that dripped from his slit—and hummed in satisfaction at his clean taste. The spit from your mouth leaked off of your tongue, slipping down his length messily as you looked up at him from under your lashes. You watched as he bit into his lip unconsciously, his eyes staring into yours with an intensity you had only ever seen on his face in battle, concentrating on your every move.
Choso could feel his brain practically melting over how hot the visual of you on your knees for him was. Your perfect, pretty face, your bright eyes, your soft, cherry-colored lips… You were so beautiful and sweet, yet so naughty, as he watched you work your tongue over his aching length—the contradiction making his head feel thick with lust. Seeing your pretty lips so glossy with spit and his pre-cum made his dick feel like it was about to burst at any second. He barely understood this feeling: the desire to want something, someone, so badly that he physically ached. But there you were, on your knees between his legs with your pretty mouth running up and down his cock… And he felt the urge to do things to you that he barely even understood.
He whimpered again and rolled his hips involuntarily as you swirled your tongue around his tip, the sensations driving him insane. He couldn’t help but start whining for you, and you hadn’t even put him properly in your mouth. But the way your warm, wet tongue teased him was enough for him to know that his hand would never come close to the amount of pleasure you could give him.
“Need more, please,” he begged softly, in his deep, gruff voice. His eyes were so dark with lust as he held your gaze, watching as your tongue lolled out to lick up his shaft on either side. He groaned low in his throat, his fingers threading into the hair at the back of your head as his touch grew unconsciously rougher.
“You’re so needy today, Cho,” you teased him with a smile before pressing your lips lightly to his tip. But you were feeling the same urge. You were so turned on from watching and feeling how responsive he was to your touch; you couldn’t help but want to give him more, to be the one to make him feel pleasure he had never experienced before.
virgin!Choso who was about to respond to your teasing when your mouth suddenly wrapped around the head of his cock—and any cohesive thought in his brain was obliterated. Choso let out a husky groan and pushed himself back into the couch cushions as he felt your lips form a tight ring around his tip, gently moving up and down over his ridge. His hips stuttered up as you sucked him and he watched you—utterly entranced—with heavy eyes and flushed cheeks. He could feel your tongue still flicking against his frenulum as you looked up at him with your beautiful mouth stuffed full of his cock; so heavenly, yet so sinful. He felt he could get off from the view alone, his breathing coming out in fast, ragged moans. You let your lips ease slowly down his shaft feeling them stretch around his thickness as you hollowed your cheeks, wanting to make sure it felt good for him.
You pushed your mouth further down his cock—flattening your tongue against the vein on the underside of his length—making his hips buck suddenly, forcing him to the back of your throat. You gagged at the sudden intrusion—your throat constricting around his thick head, squeezing around his dick so perfectly— as spit poured from your lips. Choso whimpered loudly and his hips jerked up once more as his body instinctively chased after the warm wetness of your throat. His trembling hands unconsciously forced your face against his navel, eyes squeezed shut in pleasure as he pushed deeper into you. Your throat contracted around his swollen tip as you gagged again, starting to feel light-headed from the lack of oxygen. You let out a gargled cry and dug your nails into Choso’s strong thighs; the sharp sting bringing him back down to reality for a moment long enough that he could recover control of his body.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” He apologized profusely as his strong hands suddenly relinquished their force on the back of your head, giving you the chance to sit back up. You coughed as your mouth pulled off of his length, spit dribbling down your chin as you struggled to catch your breath. Choso looked down to meet your eyes—glassy with unspilt tears—and a pang of guilt tugged at his heart.
“I’m so sorry… I-I didn’t mean to–” Choso started nervously, afraid that he had hurt you when he saw your glistening eyes. He felt immense guilt. Here you were, offering so kindly to help him and he had ruined it. You could see the anxiety brewing in his wide, purple eyes, so you shook your head and shushed him gently, rubbing a reassuring palm over his thigh.
“It’s okay, Choso—really… I just... Didn’t expect it was all,” you said with a sweet laugh, still a little breathless but smiling up at him. You took a moment to regain your composure, wiping some of the spit that had leaked down your chin off with your hand. You could see his expression relax a little, but there was still a lingering doubt hiding in the slight furrow of his brows. “You can be rougher, if you want to be… I don’t mind,” you offered gently, your eyes looking coyly up into his.
virgin!Choso who swallowed nervously as he took in your words. His hands were back on your face now, his thumbs rubbing tenderly across your cheekbones.
“But… I don’t want to hurt you…” Choso said softly. Yet, he couldn’t deny the inexplicable lust he had felt for watching you drool over his cock, seeing those unspilt tears make your eyes shine so pretty. You shook your head gently. “You won’t. I’ll stop you if it’s too much,” you promised him assuredly. Choso swallowed nervously again, but consented with a light "O-okay," too captivated by the idea of feeling his dick inside of your warm, tight throat to put up much of a fight. His hands stayed on your cheeks as you started to pump his cock slowly with your fist again, using all of the spit that had dripped from your mouth to easily slide up and down his length. Choso whimpered, his hips already bucking gently up to meet your movements.
“Fuck… It feels so good,” he whimpered and you felt your core clench up at his needy tone. You were already so wet from sucking his cock, hearing him beg and whimper for you was making you feel like you could cum just from watching him. “Mmm, I know it does, Cho… Want to make you feel even better though,” you couldn’t help but moan back to him.
Your hand slid up and down his shaft a few more times, making audible wet sounds from how much spit had leaked out of your mouth when he gagged you. You continued to use your hand on the lower part of his length, stroking him steadily as you brought your lips to wrap around his tip once more. His hands slid back into your hair, gently holding the loose strands of hair from your face. When you felt comfortable, you picked up the pace again, sliding your lips further down Choso’s cock as your hand stroked in rhythm with your mouth. Your lips and hand were wrapped so perfectly around him… So wet, so warm, so tight… Choso’s head was spinning and he could feel his control slipping.
“Feels so good…” He repeated once more in a repressed whine as he attempted—in vain—to restrain the movements of his thrusts. “Wanna give you more, pretty. Can you take more?” He asked you so desperately, his eyes glazed over with lust and his eyebrows furrowed deeply. You could feel his thighs trembling, the little jumps his hips made as he struggled not to fuck your face as aggressively as his cock was telling him to. You hummed around him and removed your hand from his shaft, giving him permission to use your throat.
virgin!Choso who lost any remaining semblance of control after you took your hand off of him. He tried to start slowly, trying to make his hips roll lightly into your face, wanting to be as gentle as he could. But he kept pushing deeper with every thrust, making his tip press against the tight ring of your throat harder each time until he was slipping past it, bullying into it. He moaned heavily as he watched your lips stretch to fit his girth and clusters of tears gathered in your waterline, the sight only making him thrust harder.
Choso’s breathing was coming out fast again as he watched you take more of his length. His moans were breathy and whiny as his dick took over and he fucked himself into your face blatantly. His voice was so husky, but his moans were so soft and desperate and it made your cunt throb with want as he used your throat. He was humping his hips into your face with abandon now, one strong hand gripping into your hair and forcing you down on his cock while the other held onto your shoulder like a lifeline. You focused hard on relaxing your throat as he manually bobbed your head up and down his length, his dick getting squeezed so perfectly every time he felt your throat gag and constrict around him.
“F-fuck… Thank you, Y/N…Thank you…” He whined in his gruff voice, his hips shaking as he forced the warm wetness of your mouth down and up his swollen cock. He watched you drool and gag as he abused your throat, spit dripping from your chin and onto his heavy balls. His dark eyes watched as you struggled for him, for the sake of his pleasure, and he felt that familiar pressure building inside of him. You blinked up at him—vision blurred from tears—watching as his pretty face contorted with passion. The corners of his dark eyebrows were curved upwards and his swollen lips parted as he watched you so pliantly take his thick cock. 
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” Choso moaned out desperately—sounding as if he were near crying—his hips jerking more erratically as he neared his release. His back arched as his body trembled against the cushions, his head thrown back once again as he panted and whimpered. “Gonna cum,” he cried out in the most pathetically erotic voice you had ever heard. “Gonna cum in your pretty mouth…” His hand had made a fist in your hair, holding your head steady now as he let his volatile thrusts push him over the edge.
virgin!Choso who pulled your face flush against his pelvis as his cock twitched and he released his cum deep into your throat with a sob. You watched the breathtaking sight before you through watery eyes; Choso’s body trembling above you, his neck—littered with blooming lovebites—stretched so beautifully as his head tipped against the back of the couch. He panted and whined your name and his hips bucked into your face with every rope of cum that spurted from his pulsing length, forcing you to swallow all of it.
He groaned as his cock finally stopped twitching and as his grip on your hair relaxed, letting your lips release his thick cock with a pop. You pulled back, breathing heavily as drool streamed down your chin, and your eyes were glossed over with tears. A thick strand of spit hung between your lips and Choso’s tip as the two of you struggled to regain your breath. With effort, Choso pulled his head up to look down at you and gave you a dizzy grin, panted laughs escaping from his chest as he reveled in the afterglow of his orgasm. He took in your flushed cheeks, your disheveled hair, and your glassy eyes as you smiled back at him; and he thought you were the most beautiful being he had ever seen.
“How- How was that?” Choso asked breathlessly, his brain still too dazed to form a coherent sentence. You laughed in return, your eyes creasing in the corners and making him chuckle back at his own speechlessness. “You did so good, Choso," you praised him sweetly, wiping the residual drool from your chin and tears from your cheeks. "It was really hot... Watching you let go like that,” you admitted to him a little shyly as you helped pull his boxers back up his thighs, covering his half-hard cock back up (for now).
“How was it for you?” You asked him a little smugly as you smiled up at him, confident you knew his answer. Choso smirked lightly, rolling his eyes, but he still entertained your question.
“Incredible… I... Didn’t know it could feel that good,”  he admitted sincerely, still in disbelief at just how blissful you had made him feel. You smiled at him warmly and laughed as you rose to your feet, feeling more than a little proud of yourself. Choso watched you stand, his eyes gazing at you with adoration and contentment and a lazy grin plastered on his face. He patted his muscular thigh, suddenly feeling emboldened to show you just how grateful he was for you.
“Your turn..."
these just keep getting longer omg 😭 but I am having so much fun making this series more of a slow-burn and I hope you guys are enjoying as well 🫶
2K notes · View notes
ghostandsoap · 1 year
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Call Signs
Simon “Ghost” Riley x Fem! “Gecko” Reader (Ft. John “Soap” MacTavish)
Tags: Angst. Gunshot wound. Blood loss. Shock. Hypothermia. Major injury. Mentions of death. 
Word Count: 4.6k
A/N: So I’m not totally sure how accurate some of this is. Also, I’m not sure if parts of this are canon? Read with caution LOL. 
“Stay where you are. I’m on my way.”
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Military call signs. Clever, crafty, and specific to the person they’re associated with. 
There was one main, golden rule when it came to call signs: don’t complain about your own call sign, or else they’ll give you something worse.
Yours wasn’t exactly one that you were thrilled with in the beginning. It wasn’t as badass as you would’ve liked. If you had been given the opportunity to choose, you would’ve chosen something a little more…tough. But once the name stuck, you were stuck with it. You didn’t dare let even a single word of distaste fall from your mouth. If anybody caught wind of you complaining about it, they’d give you something to really complain about.
Over the years, you had heard some good ones — some more creative than others. Depending on the person, sometimes it was easy to tell the reason behind their given name — other times, not so much. You had some friends that you still didn’t know the reason why they were given their call sign.
For example, Soap was just Soap.  
In the time that you had known him, you had begged Soap to tell you where his call sign came from. You had even rattled and poked at Captain Price a bit to get him to give it up. But both of them always gave you the same answer.  
It’s classified. 
With that answer, you refused to tell anyone the reason behind your own call sign. If they weren’t going to tell you about theirs, then you weren’t telling them about yours. It was only fair, you weren’t telling anybody. Nobody knew. 
Well…nobody except–
“Gecko. This is Ghost. How copy?” The syrupy-thick voice seeped through your ear that was still ringing from gunfire. 
You were cold – miserably cold. You were chilled all the way to the bone to the point where your skin was numb to the touch. The sound of rain registered with you. The sky was pouring buckets, which explained why you were so freezing. There was no telling how long you had been passed out and exposed to the elements. Not a single part of you was dry, despite all your layers underneath and over. 
There was pain somewhere. Your groggy state made it difficult to figure out exactly where you were hurt. To be honest, it hurt just about everywhere. A searing sensation settled in your side, but it was migrating all over. Based on the large red spot leaking through that area, you had a really good idea then of what it was.
“Gecko, do you copy?” Another voice spoke that you knew to belong to Soap.
His voice sounded a million miles away, even though it was literally right in your ear. When your eyes opened, you were eye-level with the ground. You were met with a harsh pavement underneath you, muscles trembling with exhaustion and low temperatures. It took a few seconds for your vision to clear, and it took even more effort for you to raise yourself up even to make it onto your elbows. 
When you were able to take a glance around, it wasn’t any less unsettling. The slick streets of Las Almas weren’t very pleasant in the dead of night. Even worse, you didn’t know where Soap and Ghost were. 
It all came flooding back to you. Graves turned on the team. He tried to kill all of you. You, Ghost, and Soap managed to split up and narrowly escape. It was chaos, the kind that shaved about 15 years off of your life.
“C’mon. Where are you, Gecko?” Ghost asked in an aggravated, yet worried way. 
His question was more out loud and to himself more than anything, but it occurred to you that it probably would be nice for him to hear you.
“I’m here,” You groaned, throat dry and scratchy. “Just barely.”
“Oh shit. You’re alive!” Soap replied, and you swear you could feel Ghost relax from wherever he was. 
“What’s your status?” Ghost demanded.
You were not telling Ghost that you were hurt if you could help it. It was certainly against protocol, but you didn’t need Ghost getting all worked up when the three of you needed to find one another and get the hell out of there. You knew how he could get whenever you were hurt.
“Where are you both?” You rolled onto your knees, ungracefully managing to get on your feet.
You felt any and all blood rush from your face, an overwhelming feeling of nausea taking over your stomach. The bleeding in your side was definitely a problem. You stripped your outer jacket off, wrapping it around your waist and tying it as tight as you could possibly stand it. It wasn’t like the jacket was useful any other way, considering it was soaked.
“No fuckin’ idea. I’m in and out of these shops,” Soap grumbled. “I’m soakin’ wet.”
“Me too,” You managed to laugh, but it came out as more of a struggled exhale. “Ghost, what’s your location?” 
“The church. Soap’s finding his way here,” Ghost said. “What’s your status, Gecko?”
You knew he’d ask again. He always knew when you had dodged a question.
“Just a little rattled,” You lied. “Where’s the church?”
“It’s in the square. Navigate through the shops, they’ll lead you there,” Soap said. “Stay sharp. Shadows are everywhere.”
Survival mode has kicked in for you. You had one objective.
Find Ghost. Don’t get killed. 
“Will do. Ghost, I’m coming to you.” You announced, beginning to take the first few steps to get yourself moving. 
There was a brief moment of silence before he answered – and he gave an answer that you knew had Soap raising a brow.
“Please be safe.” 
A shudder vibrated down your back, and it wasn’t from the bitter cold rain. 
Being involved with Ghost was…complicated. It was a forbidden love in a lot of ways. There was a certain disapproval when it came to 2 members dating within the force. It caused drama sometimes, tension other times. Not to mention, it would be painfully awkward for everybody else if the two of you were to break up. 
But the connection was undeniable. It astounded you just how in touch you felt with him. He did everything he could to protect you, to make you feel safe in an otherwise dangerous world. He spent every spare moment with you. He spilled all of his most pressing thoughts to you, knowing his words of vulnerability were safe with you. Talking to him was easy, spending time with him was easier.
Loving him was easiest of all.
Despite your likeness toward each other, it was a mutual understanding that no one was to know. Ghost didn’t fancy all the teasing, and you wanted at least one part of your life to be private. In front of others, you were Gecko and Ghost. When alone, you were Simon and [Y/N]. 
In a lot of ways, the secretive aspect of it was fun. You liked sneaking around with Ghost in the late hours of the night, tip-toeing around sleeping comrades in an attempt at a moment to yourselves. The nonchalant glances…the discreet, yet lingering touches…the whispers of words of affection. It was all something you couldn’t help but get a kick out of. Anybody in their right mind would find it even a little bit entertaining.
But in all honesty, suspicions from the rest were becoming more and more. 
Price had known immediately. Not even three days after you and Simon decided to give it a try, he could sense that something was different. He couldn’t really explain it. He could just see it in Ghost’s behavior that he was preoccupied with something…someone else. Something that had been sprouting for a long time was now beginning to blossom in front of the captain’s very eyes. Price was a respectful man. He wasn’t one to get in the way of something that wasn’t his business. He kept an eye on the situation here and there, more for a status update than anything. 
It took Gaz about four months. He suspected nothing in the beginning. He managed to miss all the signs at first. Who could blame him? He didn’t know he was supposed to even be looking for them. He didn’t catch any real changes in behavior or attitude. In all honesty, if he hadn’t witnessed it with his very eyes – he might’ve never known. It had been a quick gesture. So quick that Gaz might’ve been able to convince himself that he was mistaken if it hadn’t been so blatantly clear.
Gaz had passed by a bit quicker than he normally would, catching a quick glimpse inside the room he hadn’t planned on entering. What he saw was a kiss being planted on the cheek of Ghost’s mask, and a light laugh from the man as you did so. Gaz had stopped dead in his tracks, stunned at what he had seen. He was tempted to turn around and question you, but he knew better. Gaz figured if he hadn’t been told outright, then it probably wasn’t for him to know. He kept it in the back of his mind, however, and after that, he began noticing everything.
And as for Soap, the poor lad had yet to connect the dots. He had heard some chatter here and there about Gecko and Ghost “getting it on.” Soap didn’t believe it. He hadn’t seen it or heard it for himself, so in his mind, the rumors were null. That didn’t mean that Soap didn’t like the idea of his lieutenant and one of his closest friends seeing each other. He entertained the thought here and there. He supposed that Gecko and Ghost had a nice ring to it, and it was something that he liked to snicker about. Overall, Soap didn’t think about it too much. There was no way that “LT” and the infamous Gecko were together. Almost a year into it, and John MacTavish was oblivious.
It hadn’t taken you long to develop feelings for Ghost. Suddenly, you were worried about where he was and him getting hurt more often than not. This was one hell of a career to be in when you were an anxious worrier. This job had changed for you. Before, there was no fear of living or dying. It was just you. It was all you. But when there was someone else in the cards?
That changed things. That really changed things.
That seemed to be the only fight that you and Ghost ever had. It was always the same one. One of you fell ill or became injured, it was due to defying an order, the other was scared to death that something worse could’ve happened, and most of all – you both wished that the other would be more careful. 
“Careful” was a funny word in this business. No matter how careful you were, that didn’t automatically make you safe. 
Roaming the streets of Las Almas while lethargic, unarmed, and bleeding was a definite reminder of that. You followed Soap’s advice, weaving in and out of the stores and getting whatever supplies you could get your hands on. A homemade weapon was better than no weapon, in your mind. Avoiding any and all Shadows was your main goal. There was no chance of you getting out of that alive, if this bullet lodged in your side didn’t kill you first. You hoped that Soap had made it to the church by now. It made you feel better to know that they were together.
The rain showed no signs of letting up anytime soon. You figured it was fine. It wasn’t like you could get any more wet than you already were. It at least made enough noise to conceal your footsteps, which you didn’t have much control over due to the splitting pain in your core. 
You just had to get to the church. Get to the church, get out of here, and get patched up. You’d be fine. You’d survived worse. You weren’t going to-
There was a flash of white over your vision. While brief, it was enough to startle you to a complete halt. You staggered out of the coffee shop, leaning against the back door for support. This was bad. This was really bad. 
“Ghost…” You squeaked.
Breathing suddenly became overly difficult. Every gulp of air was a struggle to get the next one. There was a significant wobble in your knees as you stumbled into the nearest alley for cover, knowing your legs were close to giving out. It was notably colder in the space between the two buildings, but the feeling of your soul being slowly sucked back into the universe made that seem minor. 
“Talk to me. Where are you?” Ghost asked.
That was when you collapsed, landing on the wet ground with a thud. A whimper escaped from your throat at the impact. Clutching your wounded side was all you knew to do. Your jacket used as a makeshift way of putting pressure on it was proving ineffective. 
“The alleyway,” You strained.  “Left of the coffee shop.”
Ghost and Soap both heard the trouble in your voice. Ghost had only heard that tone once before — and it was when something was really, really wrong. 
“What’s your status now?” Soap questioned.
Lying was no good to you now. They were going to know one way or the other.
“I’m down,” You swallowed. “Must’ve been hit at some point when we got away.” 
There was no way you were making it to the church. You were as good as gone as long as there was still a bullet in your torso. Bleeding out in the streets of a run-down town in Mexico wasn’t how you had envisioned going out. That was a conversation you had held with Soap more than once. Everybody had their preferred way of dying. You had always hoped that you’d meet your demise in a more memorable way. Maybe in a missile explosion or getting ejected from a helicopter in a hot pursuit.
Dying alone was the part and the possibility that always scared you the most.
This wasn’t what you had in mind. Bleeding to death by yourself in an alleyway in the middle of a run-down town in Mexico wasn’t what you had wished for. You knew the day would come…and the day had finally come.
But not if Ghost could help it.
“I’m coming to get you, Gecko. Don’t move,” Ghost remarked sternly, and you could hear that he was on the move. “Soap, we’ll meet you at the church.”
“Copy.” Soap confirmed.
“N-no,” You coughed. “Ghost, don’t leave your location if you’re secure.” 
“None of us are secure. I’m not leaving you,” Ghost said sternly. “Stay where you are. I’m on my way.” 
Arguing with Ghost was usually a lost cause. When Ghost was set on something, he was surely going to stick with it. It was a waiting game now, and it was one of the most helpless feelings to know that you were relying on somebody else to save your ass. You knew that Ghost would be there in half the time that it probably should’ve taken him, but when you’re dying, the minutes feel like eternity. 
This wasn’t the first time that you had been in situations like this. Everybody had their fair shares of “I almost died” stories. But this was different for you. This was the closest you had ever been to not living to tell this story. 
Panicking was most definitely not the way to handle this situation. Very rarely was panicking ever helpful in a dire, critical scenario like this. It was the most eerie feeling – literally feeling yourself dying. The blood loss was becoming less, but only because you were running out of blood to lose. Your heart was beating slower and slower by the second. Breathing was now a voluntary action. As the adrenaline wore off and the reality of the situation set in, your anxiety crept over you and infiltrated any room for collectedness that you had left. 
“G-Ghost.” You sighed, a layer of tears pricking at the base of your lashes.
Ghost heard the near sob in your words, putting an even faster pep in his step. 
“Almost there, Gecko. What’s wrong?” 
“I’m…I’m scared.” You admitted, hot tears mixing with the fresh rain water on your cheeks.
Ghost’s heart shattered into a million pieces, catapulting into every vessel near it like the strongest of shrapnel. He couldn’t stand the thought of you alone and scared. 
“I know. Just keep talking to me and Soap,” He breathed, trying to stay calm for you. “I’m coming, G.”
‘G’ was a nickname inside of a nickname. Ghost only used it sparingly, and it was usually when he was trying to be supportive or sympathetic without giving your secret romantic endeavor away.  
It felt silly to say. Generally speaking, you didn’t really have the right to be afraid. It was the pure passion for your job and your own willingness that put you in dangerous situations. It was your own free will, your own decision that you made the same choice on every single time. It was one thing to be scared when you ended up here accidentally. It was another when it was a consequence of your choices and actions. Courage and strength were supposed to be your strong suits. They were the characteristics that you were supposed to fall back on every time.
Yet here you were. Scared to death of dying – something that you had thought about and been preparing for since you started this gig.
“Simon, I-I…I don’t want to d-”
“It’s ‘cause I clean house quickly.” Soap’s voice echoed in one ear and out the other, suddenly and abruptly.
What? 
Even in a near unconscious-like state, you were still well aware of how that needed some clarification.
“S-say again?” You stuttered, the corners of your vision beginning to go foggy. 
“Soap. ‘Cause I clean house and buildings with speed ‘n accuracy,” Soap repeated. “That’s why they call me Soap.”
Soap!
It made so much sense. You were almost embarrassed that you didn’t think of that yourself. You knew it was Soap’s way of distracting you – keeping your mind off of dying. 
“That’s a good one,” You nearly wheezed. “Thought it was because you were a bath man.” 
“Thanks for that image. Won’t be able to unsee that one,” Ghost piped up. “Almost there, Gecko. Hang on for me, yeah?” 
Ghost’s voice was strained as if he were running. Using every ounce of speed and stamina that he had to get you as fast as possible. He couldn’t lose you like this.
He refused to lose you like this. 
“It’s because I’m quick on my feet, and because I can scale a building faster than anybody.” You croaked.
“Ah. That’s why they call you Gecko?” Soap chuckled, and you could hear the amusement in his words.
“Came up with that one myself.” Ghost smirked.
“Some people might even say geckos are kind of cute.” You joked, but didn’t quite have the energy to laugh.
“I’d agree with that,” Ghost countered, and you could sense Soap’s internal confusion from forever away. “I have a visual on Gecko. Almost at the church, Soap?” 
“Affirmative, Lt. Meet you there.” 
Sure enough, Ghost appeared from seemingly nowhere, like a sent guardian angel. Your vision had tunneled, so you couldn’t see much out of your peripherals. He had never seen you so weak and close to going out on him. His eyes behind the mask were wide and dark, focused on getting you out alive.
“Nice to see you, Lieutenant.” You shivered.
“Glad you’re not a goner,” He returned, removing the glove from his right hand and pressing his fingers against your cheek. “Shit. You’re freezing.”
“How bad do I look?” You slurred, and you fought to keep your eyeballs from rolling back into your head. 
“Probably not as bad as you feel. You’ve lost a lot of blood.” Ghost said, working quickly to get himself arranged to carry you.
“Did you see any Shadows on the way?” You gulped, eyelids beginning to flutter. 
“They’re everywhere. We need to get going,” Ghost scooped you up effortlessly, as if you weighed nothing and weren’t dripping wet through multiple layers. “C’mon, love. Let’s get you out of here.”
The journey from the ground to up into Ghost’s arms felt like an airplane takeoff. You were close to slipping out of consciousness.
“We’ll get to Soap and get a vehicle out of here,” Ghost explained, readjusting his arm underneath your knees. “You’re going to be fine, Gecko.”
“G-Guess I wasn’t quick enough this time, huh?” You gave the faintest grin, and Ghost couldn’t help but laugh at your stupid joke.
“Shut up.” 
There was relief in knowing that you were with Ghost. Your chances of dying hadn’t changed, but if you were going to die, this was a better way of going out. 
The fog in your vision became thicker and thicker until you couldn’t see or hear a thing. The darkness surrounded you, sucking you deeper and deeper into nothingness.
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The next time your eyes opened, you weren’t met with the dim streets of Las Almas. There was no smell of rain or taste of blood and sweat. The smell this time was sterile air and cheap (but clean) bedsheets. You couldn’t taste anything due to the worst case of cottonmouth that you had ever experienced. The beeping music of an EKG reader and distant chatter was the real giveaway. 
The muscles in your legs were stiff, mainly because you hadn’t moved them in so long. A grunt was all you could manage as you shifted, a new type of discomfort erupting where you had been shot. It was all wrapped up now (professionally and medically wrapped), clean and taken care of. There was an IV in each arm, one administering fluids and the other what you could only imagine to be some kind of pain medication. The white walls and tan floors were weirdly comforting…a sign to let you know that you were safe for now. 
The best sights of all were the ones seated to the left of your bed.
Ghost’s arms were crossed, ankles crossed over each other, and his head lowered and his breathing steady. His outer skull mask was nowhere to be seen, but his balaclava was clinging to his face as always. 
Soap was also snoozing, but less peacefully and quietly. His head was tilted back as far as it possibly could go, his arms draped at his sides, legs stretched all the way out, and snoring so loud that you were surprised you hadn’t already heard it.
You were gentle as you called to Ghost, considering he didn’t always react calmly when being woken up.
“Hey…” You rasped with a dry throat. “Ghost.”
His eyes snapped open, flickering up to you instantly. A monumental wave of relief visibly crashed over him, filling his veins and relaxing his heart.
“You’re awake,” He leaned closer, taking your hand into his. “You’re okay.”
“What…how long has it been?” You asked, bits of your memory coming back to you.
“A few days…four I think, ” He answered with a nod. “How do you feel?”
Honestly, you weren’t sure. Physically you felt terrible, but better than when you were dying of shock, cold, and blood loss. Mentally you felt fuzzy and groggy from being out so long. Emotionally…well, only time would tell.
“Like shit.” You admitted.
“Not surprised.” He grinned under his face covering. 
There were a few beats of silence. You took a few glances around, getting familiar with your new setting. Ghost, though, never took his eyes off of you. They were a light shade of red, and even his balaclava couldn’t hide the dark circles under them.
“Have you slept at all?” You asked, knowing good and well he hadn’t left your side.
“A little bit here and there,” He said, motioning his free hand towards Soap. “This is the most sleep Soap’s gotten this whole time. He’s been out for about 30 minutes.”
Soap was indeed out like a light. You couldn’t imagine how tired the two of them were. There was another stretch of silence. This one lasted longer and was much more tense. This wasn’t an easy encounter. How were you supposed to act when you had barely scraped by with your life?
“Simon?” 
“Yeah, love?”
“How close was it?”
Simon stared for a moment. No formation of an answer to your question occurred for a second or two. He didn’t like that question. He had avoided thinking about it until now. Ghost knew that he’d have to do his own mentality check in with himself in a few days. He had almost lost the most important person in his life…he’d need to deal with that. 
“Too close.” 
Another silence. Another silent thank you that you were here to see another day.
“You were…hypothermic, in shock. You lost a lot of blood before and during surgery,” He said. “Doc said if it had been any later getting you help-”
“Hey,” A groggy voice piped in, unaware that he was interrupting. “Gecko’s up.”
Soap’s eyes were just as bloodshot as Ghost’s, but Soap’s personality was wide awake.
“Happy to see you again, Sergeant. My apologies for being absent from our reunion at the church.” You grinned.
“Yeah, yeah. Left us to do double the work,” Soap chuckled. “Feels weird callin’ you Gecko now that I know where it comes from.”
“Soap doesn’t have the same ring to it, I have to say.” You fired back. 
“Agh, I’m crushed. Right in my pride!” He shrieked. 
The three of you shared a soft laugh. Nothing like Soap’s comedic relief to break the tension. You felt okay. This was just one of those things. One of the things that you signed up for with this job. It didn’t make it any less unnerving, but now you felt like you could really move on from this. 
And you were thankful that you had lived to tell the story. 
There was a sudden itch in your throat. An annoying tickle that reminded you that you hadn’t had a physical sip of water in four days. 
“Do you think that I could get some water?” You wondered aloud, nearly choking on your own words from the parched feeling.
Ghost hadn’t left your side when you were knocked out, and he surely wasn’t leaving now that you were awake.
“Johnny, could you-”
“Yep! On it.” He scurried out and down the hall without another word. 
That left you and Ghost. The man that saved your life by risking his own to come back for you. You didn’t even want to think about what you would’ve done if Ghost had gotten killed at your expense. At least you would’ve died together, but that hardly sounded right or fair. Ghost deserved so much more. 
“You scared me.” Ghost confessed, not even hiding the worry in his voice. 
“I know…I’m sorry.”
“Not your fault, doll. Just…” He sighed. “Just really thought that I had lost you this time.” 
There wasn’t anything you could say to make him feel better. You knew that because you had been in his shoes. His head wasn’t in the best place. You knew that even better. But if there was one thing you knew for sure, it was that you loved him more than anybody else ever could.
“Thanks for coming back for me.” You whispered, a sudden set of tears slipping down your cheeks.
Ghost raised his balaclava. The material stopped just under his nose, his bare lips coming to press a kiss to the back of your hand. He made a solemn swear to himself in that moment that he’d never take you for granted again. He’d never get too comfortable with having you around and at his disposal.
Because fate was far too cruel for that.
“Always.” 
8K notes · View notes
candycandy00 · 6 months
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The Doll House - A Toji x Reader Fanfic Part 1
You’re in love with Toji, even after finding out he trains sex dolls at the Doll House. Taking a chance, you sell yourself to the Doll House so he can be your trainer, and you bet him that you can make him fall for you by the end of the training.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Read Geto’s Part Here!
Read Nanami’s Part Here!
Read Sukuna’s Part Here!
Read Gojo’s Part Here!
Read Choso’s Part Here!
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On the outskirts of town, there stands a particular shop called the “Doll House”. Inside its walls you can find a “doll” to match any taste you might have. All your desires will be fulfilled, no matter how depraved. Satisfaction is guaranteed! The dolls are exceptionally high quality, thanks to the skillful trainers who work with them twenty-four hours a day, molding them into perfect toys for your enjoyment.
Each trainer has a specialty that they focus on, and they all take great pride in their work. Their methods differ greatly, their approaches vary, but they all follow one rule: never get attached to a doll. After the training is complete, they hand the dolls over to their new owners, and never see them again. However, just once over the course of their careers, trainers are allowed to pick a doll they’ve personally trained and keep her as their own.
AU! Each trainer will get their own story! This is Toji’s. I’m not sure how many parts it will have. If you’d like to be tagged in future parts, let me know! You must be an adult to be tagged! Any feedback whatsoever is adored! I’m keeping the same tag list as Geto’s part. If you’d like to be removed, please let me know!
Note: Consider these parts AU’s within an AU. So you might see Geto with a different doll from the reader in his part, but just consider this an alternate timeline lol. 
Smut. 18+. Short Fem Reader. Cock drunk reader. Age difference (Reader is 20, Toji is 38). Size difference kink. Oral sex. Fingering. Use of aphrodisiacs. Divider by @benkeibear!
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You’ll never forget the day you met Fushiguro Toji. It was your first day at your first job, straight out of high school. A job you still have now, over two years later: working the register at a convenience store in town. 
That day, you were still being taught the ropes by a friendly older co-worker. You heard the bell on the door signaling a customer was walking in, and you turned to give them the practiced greeting. What you found was the biggest, tallest, hottest man you’d ever seen in your life. He was quite a bit older than you, with a scar on the corner of his mouth, but he was absolutely ripped and had lovely green eyes. He was wearing simple clothes, sweatpants and a T-shirt that clung a little too tightly to his muscular form. 
At first glance, he was intimidating. He had a dangerous aura to him, and you remember thinking that he could rob the place and not even need a weapon. You glanced at your co-worker, who smiled and whispered, “I know he’s kinda scary, but he’s a regular. Don’t worry.”
You watched the man grab a few snacks and a pack of beer, then bring them to the counter. When he was standing right in front of you, his imposing height was even more noticeable. Especially considering your short stature. 
As you nervously rang up his items, you looked up at him and said, “May I please see your ID?”
You felt silly asking this man for ID to buy beer when he was obviously much older than you, but your co-worker was watching your performance on your first day. You’d been told to always ask for ID, no matter what, when selling alcohol. 
The man didn’t seem offended, thank goodness. He pulled out a wallet and then a drivers license. You stared at it, trying to glean as much information as you could without being weird about it. His name was Fushiguro Toji. Thirty-six years old. Shit, he was old enough to be your dad, exactly twice your age at the time. 
But you’d smiled and thanked him, saying the usual, “Have a nice night!”
He smiled back and said, “You too!” as he walked out the door. And you were a goner.
Over the next few months, Toji came into the store often, at least three or four times a week. You’d finally gotten comfortable enough to start making small talk with him, and a few times he even lingered after paying for his items, just chatting with you. 
There was nothing romantic or even flirty about his attitude towards you. He probably thought you were too young for him. But by this point you were nursing a pretty major crush. There was something about his casual, easy-going attitude that contrasted with his huge size and the intimidating, dangerous vibes he emitted. It drove you wild. 
Everything changed one night, nearly a year after you started working at the convenience store. You were working alone on a slow night when a man dressed in dark colors, a hood pulled up over his hair, walked in. He lurked in the store for a bit, browsing the magazine rack and then the beverages. When he finally brought a few items up to the counter, you began ringing them up. 
All at once, out of nowhere, there was a large knife pointing at your throat. The man was holding it steadily in his hand as he said, “Empty the register!”
By reflex, you held your hands up in a motion of surrender. “Please, sir, don’t hurt me! I’m just-“
“Empty the fucking register or I’ll stab you in the fucking face!”
With trembling hands, you opened the register and began placing the stacks of money on the counter. Your heart was pounding rapidly, sweat beginning to bead on your forehead, tears threatening to leak from your eyes. You’d never been more terrified in your life. 
There was a button on the underside of the counter that would trigger an alarm system when pressed, but the man was watching your hands intently. You didn’t dare do anything to anger him. Even so, when you were almost finished emptying the register, he suddenly jabbed the knife in your direction, almost stabbing you in the cheek. 
“You pushed the button, didn’t you?!” he demanded, his eyes wild. 
“No! I never touched it! I swear!”
He raised the knife, preparing to slash down at you, but he froze mid swing when the bell on the door jangled. Both of you looked toward the door, only to see Toji walking inside. 
You didn’t know whether to feel relieved or worried. Toji looked strong, but he was unarmed. You didn’t want him to be hurt. 
Toji looked at you, at your frightened face, your hands in front of you in a defensive position, then at the man holding the knife. The situation must have been clear, because Toji’s expression darkened as he stepped toward the counter. 
The man turned his whole body around to face Toji, the knife now pointed away from you. “Stay back!” the man yelled. There was a tinge of fear in his voice. 
“Are you making trouble in my favorite store? For my favorite cashier?” Toji asked, walking at a leisurely pace. “I can’t let that slide.”
Toji disappeared. That’s the only way you could describe it. He moved so fast that it looked like he disappeared and then reappeared right in front of the man, wrenching the knife free and sending it clattering across the floor. Then, in another instant, the man was on his back on the floor, Toji on top of him, giving him a savage beating. 
You watched the scene with a mixture of awe and fear. Toji was grinning as he repeatedly punched the man in the face, blood and even a couple of teeth flying through the air. It was brutal, it was violent… it was insanely hot. 
When the man stopped moving, seemingly unconscious, Toji stood up and approached the counter. “Are you alright?”
You looked up at him, tears in your eyes. You looked down at your own hands and realized they were still shaking. In one fluid motion, Toji jumped over the counter and stood next to you. “Hey, are you hurt? Did he cut you?”
You shook your head, but you couldn’t seem to speak. Instead, you threw yourself into his arms. He patted your back. “It’s okay. You’re okay. I took care of him for you,” he said in a voice far softer than you’d ever heard from him. 
He ended up staying with you until the police arrived, and that’s the night your crush on him ended. From that night on, you were in love with him. 
It would be several months after that when you confided in your friendly coworker about your feelings. She looked at you in shock and said, “Oh honey, don’t you know what he does for a living?” When you said no, she gave you a pitying look before saying, “He works as a trainer at the Doll House.”
That came as a huge surprise to you, and also felt like a knife to your heart. So he spent his days having sex with beautiful women. No wonder he never flirted with you, or seemed to notice at all when you made clumsy attempts to flirt with him. 
But it was too late. You were already in love, and finding out you had even less of a chance with him than you already thought did nothing to dampen your passion. You found yourself fantasizing about being a doll he was training, about being pinned down by his muscular body and fucked all night long. 
You’d only had one boyfriend, back in high school. The few times you’d slept with him had been unsatisfying and underwhelming. In fact you’d barely felt him when he was inside you. It left you wondering what sex would feel like with a guy who knew what he was doing, or a guy big enough to make sure you felt him. Toji was certainly a big guy. So you dreamed about him taking you in his bed, bending you over a table, even about him coming into the store and lifting you onto the counter so you’d be high enough for him to fuck you without bending too far. 
Now, exactly two years after meeting him, your desire for him is at an all time high. You want him. All of him. You want him physically, of course, but you want him emotionally as well. You want to spend hours talking to him, because your chats in the store just aren’t enough. You want to meet his family, find out what his favorite books and movies are, to cook dinner with him, to just… know him. 
And so, without consulting anyone who might talk some sense into you, you decide to do something totally reckless and probably stupid. 
You’ve paid such close attention to Toji’s buying habits that you’ve figured out his patterns. Every six weeks, like clockwork, he buys a pack of beer and extra snacks. Otherwise he avoids alcohol and only buys a few items. Your guess, considering the timing, is that he buys these items when he’s finished training a doll, almost like a reward to himself for a job well done. 
He came in early today and bought the “magic items” as you call them. Which means his doll’s training is complete as of today. Which means he’s available as a trainer. 
After he leaves, you take off early from work and head over to the Doll House. You park on the street and watch as Toji’s car pulls around to the back, then you see him walking toward the front door. 
This is your only chance! If you don’t act now, you’ll have to wait another six weeks, and you don’t think you can do that. 
Steeling your resolve, you get out of your car and hurry over to stop Toji before he goes inside. 
“Excuse me, Toji?”
He stops and turns to face you, a flicker of
surprise on his face. “Hey, what are you doing here?” he asks, his tone friendly. 
You hesitate. You had this all planned out, but standing right here in front of him is making you more nervous than you expected. He’s looking at you curiously, probably wondering why the hell you followed him to his job. In a panic, you just blurt out what you want to say. 
“I’m in love with you!”
“Oh, uh, thanks,” he says. “I’m flattered, but-“
“And I want to be your doll!”
His face seems to freeze. “Huh?”
Your own face is burning with embarrassment, but you’ve come this far. You can’t back out now. “I want to sell myself to the Doll House, if you’ll agree to be my trainer!”
He leans forward and looks at you closely, then asks, “How old are you?”
“I’m twenty,” you answer. 
He sighs and scratches the back of his head. “Go home. This is no place for you.”
You stare up at him, not backing down. “I’m serious about this. I want you to train me.”
His eyes sweep over you, down and back up. It feels like the first time he’s ever looked at you as a woman. “Look, if you want me to fuck you that badly, I can take you out back and rail you in my car. But you don’t wanna be a doll. Trust me.”
It’s tempting to take him up on that offer. But you can’t let yourself get distracted now. “I don’t just want sex. I mean I want that too but… I’m really in love with you! I want your heart too. If you have no interest in me at all, just say so and I’ll drop it. But if you’re attracted to me, even a tiny bit, let me be your doll!”
**********************
Toji looks down at the girl in front of him, wondering what he did or said to make her feel this way. He’s always thought of her as the cute, cheery little cashier who always greeted him with a bright smile. And that’s pretty much it. He assumed she was younger than she is, probably because she’s so damn short, so it really never occurred to him to think of her in a sexual way. 
But looking at her now, knowing she’s an adult, he thinks she’s quite pretty. Still, she must be naive, or have really bad judgement, if she fell in love with someone like him. And wanting to be a doll? Did she even understand what that meant?
“It’s a ten year contract,” he tells her. “You’re signing away ten years of your life when you become a doll.”
“I know that.”
“You’re basically a sex slave. You have to do all kinds of filthy stuff, whether you want to or not.”
She nods. “I understand.”
Toji thinks she definitely doesn’t understand. She practically has hearts in her eyes. Shit, she’s actually in love with him!
Well, time to give her a wake up call. 
He steps closer, looming over her, exuding a threatening aura. “My training isn’t romantic. It’s not about love,” he tells her in a serious tone, “it’s about fucking you all day and all night until you’re so cock drunk, the only thing you can think about is cock. You’ll feel empty when my dick isn’t buried in your pussy. You’ll feel hungry when you’re not drinking my cum. And even if you’re sore and exhausted, I won’t stop. There’s no breaks in my training. Love will be the last thing on your mind, because by the end of it, you’ll want any cock that’s available, no matter who it belongs to.”
She stares up at him. He expected her to cry and run away, or at least look frightened. But she has a strangely blank expression as she asks, “Are you trying to scare me away?”
He narrows his eyes. “Is it working?”
She smiles. “Nope. I know how I feel. I might get addicted to you, but I’ll never want anyone else!”
He sighs again. “See, that’s another reason I can’t do it. As trainers we’re not supposed to let dolls get attached to us. You’re already attached. How are you gonna feel when I hand you over to some random guy, and you’re stuck with him for ten years?”
She doesn’t falter even then. Instead she says, “I heard a rumor that trainers can keep a doll they’ve trained.”
Oh. So that’s her plan. “Yeah, I can keep exactly one. Not to be rude, because you’re cute and all, but what makes you think I’ll pick you as the one and only doll I can keep?”
She looks him straight in the eyes. “I’m willing to bet on my love. It’s a gamble I can take, because the reward will be worth it.”
He chuckles. “Ten years with me is a reward? You’re delusional.”
“Maybe so. But it doesn’t change how I feel. I bet you’ll fall in love with me before the training is over!”
He laughs and bends over slightly to face her. “And I bet I can turn you into a cock drunk slut who doesn’t care about love.”
Her eyes light up. “So you’ll be my trainer?”
Shit. He got caught up in the moment. He never could resist a bet. “If we do this, you can’t complain. I’m not gonna go easy on you just because I know you from the convenience store. You can’t pull the shy virgin card. I’m gonna be fucking your brains out constantly, filling every hole you have.”
Her face reddens, but there’s excitement in her love struck eyes. “I’m not a virgin,” she says, “and I might be a little shy at first but I’ll get over it.” Then she meets his gaze again. “You’re all I’ve thought about for two years. I want you to wreck me!”
His eyes widen. She’s cuter than he realized. She’s so small framed, he could snap her in half like a twig, but she’s determined and strong willed. He’s starting to look forward to splitting her open on his cock. 
“Okay, if you’re sure about this, come inside and sign the contract,” he says. 
******************
The inside of the Doll House is, oddly, almost exactly how you imagined it would be. Everything looked opulent and classy, the furnishings all expensive, the colors all rich. The smell of some sort of perfume fills the air, making you slightly dizzy as you follow Toji inside. 
“Wait here, I’ll get the owner,” he says, disappearing into a dark hallway. When he returns a few minutes later, a beautiful woman with silver hair is with him, holding a contract. 
“Read this very carefully,” she says, “then sign if you agree to the terms.”
Despite your reckless plan, you still take the time to read over the contract. Everything sounds fair, so you take a pen from the nearby counter and sign on the dotted line. Toji watches with an unreadable expression. 
Once you’ve signed, Toji leads you further into the house, down a hall, and to a door. “This is my room,” he says, opening the door and motioning you in. “You’ll spend most of your time in here, but you’re not confined. You can wander the house if you want.”
Walking into his room, you feel a bit overwhelmed. It’s fancy, like the rest of the house, but there’s enough personal touches for you to see his personality. There’s a large punching bag hanging from the ceiling in the corner, a mini fridge sitting on a cheap-looking metal stand beside a large TV. The bed is made, surprisingly, but it still looks a little sloppy. There’s laundry scattered here and there on the floor. 
“You can send for some clothes and stuff later. You won’t need much thought,” he tells you, tossing some clothes out of a nearby chair. “Here, have a seat.”
You walk over and sit down in the offered chair. Toji leans against the dresser and begins explaining the rules. 
“As a doll under my training, you have to do whatever I say, no matter what it is. If you don’t, you’re breaking the contract. I don’t do freaky shit like punishments or collars or whatever. You’ll see plenty of that with the other trainers. If you don’t follow my orders, I’ll just send you home and you’ll get sued.”
You nod. That all seems simple enough. 
Toji goes to the mini fridge and opens it, then comes toward you with a small bottle of liquid. “Drink this,” he says.
You look at the bottle without touching it. “What is it?”
“It’s an aphrodisiac. It helps with the training.”
“Oh, I don’t think I need that,” you say. 
Toji frowns. “You wanted me to train you, so listen to your trainer. Drink it.”
You take the bottle from him and pull off the lid. After giving the liquid inside a quick sniff, you shrug and down the whole bottle, then give him back the now empty container. 
“How long does it take to work?” you ask. 
He gives you a grin. “Just a few minutes. You’ll know it when you feel it.”
“Okay,” you reply, trying to act cool when you’re about to burst from excitement. The man you’re madly in love with, that you’ve been thinking about nonstop for two years, is going to touch you, kiss you, have sex with you! You want to squeal! But mixed in with the excitement is a little bit of nervousness. What if you can’t satisfy him? What if he’s too rough? 
He’s back to leaning against the dresser, one ankle crossed over the other, casual slide-on sandals on his feet. He’s wearing baggy sweatpants and a form fitting T-shirt, his standard look. God, he looks good. You can’t wait to have those big strong hands on you, sliding over your body, pinning your arms above your head, squeezing your-
Wait. Is the aphrodisiac already working? You were already thirsty for him but suddenly you feel like tackling him to the floor. Your body feels hot, like you’re running a fever. Your breathing has quickened. You look up to find Toji grinning at you. It’s a smug, knowing grin. He knows exactly what’s happening. 
He pushes away from the dresser and casually strolls over to you. “Sure you’re ready for this?” he asks as he stands over you. 
You gulp as you look up at him, probably looking the same way a mouse does before a hungry hawk. “Y-yeah! I’m totally ready!”
He kneels down in front of your chair, placing one hand on each of your thighs, and then moving them up, dragging your skirt with them. Your breath catches in your throat when your skirt is hiked up around your waist, revealing your blue and white striped panties. He locks eyes with you as he hooks his fingers into the waistband and slowly pulls your panties down, sliding them under your ass and all the way off your ankles. 
His hands are firm as they push your legs up and apart, leaving them to hang over each arm of the chair, spreading you open. His eyes flick up to your face once more before he dives in, burying his face in your wet pussy. His tongue goes straight to work, teasing your clit by drawing circles around it while two of his fingers slide inside you. You’re so slick with arousal that they slip right in despite their size, then pump in and out as his lips close around your sensitive nub, sucking hard enough to pull on it, making your body jolt. 
“Oh God!” you moan, your back arching in the chair, your head tossed back. Toji’s lips release you, his tongue now lapping at the juices leaking out of you as his fingers continue moving. You’ve never felt such intense stimulation in your life. And to think… the man you’re crazy about is doing this to you! It’s euphoric. 
You lose track of time as Toji eats you out in the chair. You eats your pussy like he’s a starving man, and you can only quiver and squirm in pleasure, moaning and gasping. 
“Ahhh… Toji!” you scream out when you feel his teeth lightly graze your clit. Then it’s his tongue again, then his lips, and finally your body can’t take any more pleasure. You cum with a loud cry of his name, and you look down just in time to see fluid squirting out of you, most of it hitting Toji right in the face. 
He pulls back, licking his lips and using the collar of his shirt to wipe his face. He laughs and says, “Didn’t know you were a squirter!”
You blush crimson. “I’ve never done that before! I’m sorry it got all over you.”
“Are you kidding? I love squirters! Lets me know I’m doing a good job. You can spray my face anytime.”
Before you can respond to that, Toji stands up and then scoops you into his arms. You feel weightless when held by his massive strength as he carries you to the bed and lies you on your back. 
With expert motions, he pulls your shirt up your body and over your head, tossing it to the floor where it blends in with the rest of the laundry, then slides your skirt down and off, leaving you completely bare. 
Then, he begins undressing himself. You watch breathlessly as he takes his shirt off, revealing his muscled chest. God, he’s gorgeous. He wears a smirk as he shoves his pants down, watching your eyes bulge at the sight of his humongous cock. Oh, you’re definitely going to feel that! If he can even get that tower of a dick to fit. 
Maybe it’s the aphrodisiac, or maybe it’s the fact that you love him, but you’re not scared at all. You just want him inside you, even if he has to tear you apart. So when he climbs onto the bed and pushes your legs up, folding you in half, you’re ecstatic. Even when you feel his tip at your soaking wet entrance, even when his heavy body presses down on you, effectively pinning you to the bed, it doesn’t even occur to you to panic. You look up at him lovingly, waiting for your fantasies to finally come to life. 
He shoves into you, all the way in on the first thrust, stretching you impossibly wide and deep. It takes your breath away, your hands gripping his broad shoulders. It feels like he just penetrated your womb, even if you know that’s physically impossible. There’s a dull, throbbing ache inside you, but it’s a feeling you welcome. Because you’re stuffed so completely full of the man you love. 
After giving you a few moments to accommodate his size, he begins pumping into you, slowly at first but quickly picking up speed. With every thrust, you gasp, your fingers digging into his skin. It hurts and it feels great at the same time. “T-Toji…”
You look up at him, and he’s looking back
at you with heated eyes. “Fuck, you’re tight! Holy shit!” he mutters, thrusting even harder, rocking your whole body against the bed. 
“Ahhh… Toji…. it’s so deep!”
You hear him chuckle, then he leans down, putting his mouth close to your ear as he says, “Baby, I’m only halfway in.”
“What?!” you gaze up at him in shock. “But I thought…”
He grins. “You thought this was it? I’m insulted.” He laughs, patting your head. “You’re adorable. But I think this is all you can handle right now. I’m not into hurting dolls.”
“M-more…” you murmur. 
“Huh?”
“I want more of you! I want all of you!” The words burst from your mouth in a cry as your arms wrap around him. “I don’t care if it hurts! I lo-“
He cuts off your cries with a kiss, his lips smothering your own, his tongue in your mouth. When he pulls away, you’re left panting. 
“There’s plenty of time for that, trust me,” he says, his voice low. “This tight little pussy is gonna get every inch of me. But right now, this is your limit.”
As if to punctuate his words, he gives a hard thrust, making you moan and tighten your grip on his neck. He’s too much, but it’s still not enough for you. You want everything he has, but you agreed to listen to him as your trainer, so you drop the issue and let yourself enjoy the feeling of him inside your body, his toned abdomen scraping across you, the smell of his cologne drifting around the room. 
You didn’t think you could fall anymore deeply in love with him, but you have. 
********************
Toji wants nothing more than to plow his entire length into his new doll’s tiny, drenched pussy, and she’s practically begging for it, but he was telling the truth when he said he didn’t like hurting dolls. He wasn’t like Sukuna, who got off on inflicting pain. Toji could enjoy giving some asshole a beating, but he’d never understood the appeal of hurting a lover. 
The girl currently writhing in ecstasy beneath him was so small in stature, and a bit younger than the dolls he usually trained. He was aware of his own size, of his unusual strength, and so he had to be careful with dolls like her. He didn’t want to break her. 
As he fucks her, he kisses her again, on her lips, her neck, her breasts, tasting her sweet skin. He slides one hand down between their bodies and finds her clit with his thumb, making her tremble and cry out his name again. 
He looks down at her blissed out face. She’s staring at him so longingly, her face flushed with pleasure, her lips parted and wet with his own saliva, he feels his jaded heart skip a beat. 
Does she actually love him? Or has she just convinced herself that she does? Either way, it doesn’t matter. Within a couple of weeks she’ll be turning those pretty, loving eyes on anything with a cock. 
As for Toji, he will never fall in love with her. He tried love once, long ago, and it only brought him misery. Much easier to have fun fucking dolls and then send them on their way. 
The doll cries out loudly, her body shaking under him as she cums, her arms clinging to him. “Toji… I love you…” she says, barely conscious. 
She really is cute, he thinks, and tight as fuck. He thrusts into her for a few more minutes as she rides out her orgasm, then pulls out of her. His cum shoots out onto her prone body, coating her tits. Her eyes flutter open and she looks down, touching the sticky fluid with her fingers. She looks disappointed. 
“You didn’t cum inside me?” Her voice is weak, almost sad. It makes him want to fill her with his seed until it’s pouring out of her. 
“Not until you get on birth control,” he tells her. It’s something all dolls are expected to do. No one wants to deal with a pregnancy, least of all Toji. One brat is enough for him. 
He gives her a few minutes to catch her breath, then reaches down and rolls her onto her stomach. “Time for round two,” he whispers into her ear. 
She turns her head suddenly to look back at him. “Right now?!”
He points down at his still fully hard cock. “I took one of those aphrodisiacs myself. I can go for hours! I told you, you don’t get breaks in my training.”
There’s a flicker of panic on her face, but it’s quickly replaced by excitement. She draws up her knees and lifts her hips. “Okay. Maybe you can put it all the way in this time?”
His eyes shimmer as he says, “Fuck, you’re already hungry for my cock, aren’t you?”
She blushes but smiles at him. “Well, that, and I just love you so much. I want to feel all of you, everything about you.”
He looks away from her face, focusing on the sexy little ass sticking up in the air. “That’s good for you, then. Cause we’re just getting started.”
Tag List:
@suguguro @kaedear @onyxsphynx @poopoobuttsy @butterskyy @collectionofdolls @akaotv @witchbybirth @bloofinntoona @wasurenagusaa @tclbts @tojirin @lucyrocks86 @badbyeyoongi @97britt @aydene @lzaj19 
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asdfghjklmals · 6 months
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BACK TO SCHOOL✩༶‧˚
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GENRE + T/W: sfw, fluff. WORD COUNT: 4.5k words. TAGS: satoru gojo x fem!oc. adoptedkiddos! megumi & tsumiki. overprotective!oc.
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SYNOPSIS: oc gojo girlfriend and satoru take megumi and tsumiki to get registered for school! AUTHOR'S NOTE: this was such a random piece that was sitting in my drafts, but i wanted to write more of guardian oc gojo girlfriend and satoru. oc gojo girlfriend will throw down with anyone who says shit about her kids or her man lol i think it's her scorpio sign. and y'all know she joined the pta because she's spiteful hahaha. REMINDER: if you want to imagine yourself in oc gojo girlfriend's character descriptions instead, please do!
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"satoru, you have to take megumi and tsumiki shopping for school supplies and clothes after your morning jujutsu practice today." you called out to him while brushing your hair, "i can't go with you because i'm showing the first years around today... and then we need to take them to register for school tomorrow morning."
satoru stepped out of the steamy shower, a towel wrapped around his waist, eucalyptus body wash aroma filling the air. he made his way to your side to peck a kiss on your cheek. his wet hair dripping all over you, bright blue eyes gazing at you in adoration.
"sure thing sweetheart, but don't get mad at me if i choose something for the kids that you don't particularly like."
you held his cheek in the palm of your hand, glaring at him, "just make sure the kids' clothes match and don't waste their money. the kids don't need designer clothing."
satoru gave you a smirk and squeezed your shoulders as if he was saying ‘fine…’
“i gotta go. don't get into any trouble, okay?”
"me? trouble? never heard of it." satoru winked at you.
you glared at him as he grinned, kissing him quickly on the cheek before you attempted to leave his room.
"(y/n)?" satoru called out to you.
you turned around to see what your boyfriend wanted. "what is it, satoru?" you groaned, "i'm gonna be late."
"you gotta give me a proper goodbye kiss. none of that soft bullshit."
you reluctantly walked back over to him and giggled. "you are too much, satoru gojo."
how could you say no to a freshly showered satoru gojo enticing you with a kiss?
satoru pulled you into his lap as you straddled his waist. "now i'm definitely going to be late." you laughed.
the white haired sorcerer whispered in your ear, "just one kiss and i'll let you go."
later that day: satoru's pov
satoru, tsumiki and megumi walked around a local shopping mall in tokyo. there was a specific clothing boutique in ginza that you liked to buy clothes for the kids at.
the two fushiguros trailed behind their guardian. megumi sure missed your presence today. why did gojo-sensei have to take them back-to-school shopping instead of you? megumi always felt more comfortable whenever you were around, he always felt so small around gojo-sensei. your comforting presence always made him feel better.
tsumiki tugged at satoru's uniform, "sensei, how come (y/n) isn't coming shopping with us?"
"she's busy showing the first years around the school today," satoru smiled, "—so your cool and totally awesome sensei is going to take you guys shopping instead."
the trio entered the familiar children's boutique as an employee recognized satoru and waved. "good morning, satoru! no (y/n) today?"
"not today. she’s busy with student body president duties this year," satoru flashed a smile at the employee. he turned to his partner-in-crime, “—tsumiki, let's start with you first.”
satoru started browsing through the girl’s clothing for tsumiki. during his scan, he spotted a pink tutu. he thought that it was adorable, and tsumiki had to have it. he thought to himself, 'i'll probably get a lecture for this one, but it's too cute to pass up'.
tsumiki ended up choosing pink and neutral colored clothing. she was such a girly girl, and you had so much fun dressing her up and taking her to her dance and cheer lessons.
once satoru finished picking out some new pieces for tsumiki, he started to look at clothes for megumi. picking out clothes for boys was much easier since he knew nothing about girls' clothes. he rarely bought you clothes for that reason, especially since he knew that you were so picky.
satoru chuckled to himself when he thought of the time where he tried to buy you lingerie as a joke and almost got a high pressured water cannon shot to his face. luckily, he had his infinity on or you would've drowned him in the yokohama bay.
the white-haired guardian picked up two pairs of jeans in navy blue and black. he added shirts that megumi could layer, and new shoes into the shopping cart. he noticed that megumi was growing out of his clothes and shoes now. that kid was going to have a growth spurt soon. megumi brought over a couple of pieces of clothing he wanted and placed it in the cart innocently. satoru peered over at him.
"did you get everything you wanted, megumi?"
the child avoided eye contact with satoru, "yeah, i did."
he turned over to the older fushiguro. "—and what about you, tsumiki?"
she shot a bright smile at satoru, "yup!"
“alright, let’s head to the stationary shop.”
satoru and the children went towards the cashier to check out. he swiped his black credit card to pay for the clothes.
"sensei, that's not the bank card!" tsumiki gasped, wondering why satoru didn't use the card that was intended for tsumiki and megumi’s use.
satoru chuckled, "you're right, kiddo. this is from me and (y/n). consider it a back-to-school gift."
tsumiki's eyes sparkled, "whoa, thank you gojo-sensei!"
"thank you, sensei." megumi added to show his appreciation too, however he still avoided eye contact.
satoru smiled and ruffled megumi's hair, "you're both very welcome. make sure to give (y/n) a big ol’ hug when you see her tonight too, okay?"
the two fushiguros nodded obediently at him. of course they would give you a hug when they got home to show their appreciation. they loved you with all their hearts. you were the mother figure in their lives that they didn’t know they needed.
providing for tsumiki and megumi with your own money was something you and satoru talked about when you decided to take in the kids as your own. the plan was to set aside their financial aid money so that they would be set once they turned 18. since you and satoru came from wealthy clans, it was the least you two could do for them.
"next, we need to buy school supplies..." satoru announced as he held the shopping bags full of clothes in one hand and his shopping list that you wrote for him this morning in another, "—then we can go back to jujutsu high and have some dinner."
satoru felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. sure enough, it was you.
"hi babe." satoru greeted you over the phone with a smile.
"how's shopping with the kids?" you asked.
"i know you're going to yell at me when i get home, so i might as well tell you now—i bought tsumiki a tutu."
"satoru gojo... a tutu?!"
satoru corrected you, "excuse me, but it's 'sweetheart' or ‘babe’, to you."
"satoru..." you grumbled.
he corrected you again, "babe—"
satoru chuckled at your stubbornness, using his last name whenever you were trying to be serious with him did not scare him as much as it used to. he could tell when you were truly upset with him and when you weren’t—and this was not one of those times.
"fine then. babe, a tutu? really?" you asked in disbelief. you pinched your nose bridge in annoyance.
"it was too cute, i couldn't resist." satoru argued, "—plus, i used my own card. so don't chastise me."
you changed the subject, "is megumi doing okay without me?"
"he's just being himself... quiet." satoru cocked his head to the side to see what megumi was up to, "sounds like you're showing favorites, sweetheart. how come you never ask about tsumiki?"
"because i know that tsumiki already loves you, it's megumi i'm worried about. he's so shy around you." you explained, "—and i don't have favorites. i love them both equally."
satoru flirted with you, "what about me? am i not your favorite? do you even love me?"
"i definitely love them more than you." you teased him, "are you coming home soon?"
satoru ignored your comment about loving the kids more than him. he would make it his mission to make sure you loved him more than anything in this world.
"we'll be home soon. the kids are picking out their school supplies."
"principal yaga said that we're having a dinner to celebrate the new students. so make sure you’re back on time, please.”
satoru rolled his blue eyes so far back in his head he hoped they would get stuck. that meant that he'd have to see principal gakuganji, and he was definitely towards the bottom of his list of favorite people at jujutsu high.
“okay, babe. whatever you say.” satoru sighed.
you giggled over the receiver, “i love you, satoru gojo.”
“i love you too, sweetheart.”
satoru clamped his flip phone shut and placed it back into his front pocket. he called out to the kids, “what do you say we get some ice cream before we head back to jujutsu high? (y/n) says it's okay if we're a little late.”
the next morning
your alarm rang while satoru groaned in your chest, face buried against your sternum as you cradled his head with your arms.
"five more minutes..." satoru mumbled breathlessly into your chest.
you tried to sit up, satoru refusing to let go of you with his strong arms. you grabbed your pillow and hit him upside the head with it. you got a lucky strike, no infinity.
"wake up! we told principal kinomoto that we'd be early."
satoru took the pillow you threw at him and tossed it on the ground. he grabbed you by your waist to pull your body on top of his. you squealed as you tried to get out of his grasp.
you held his face in the palm of your hands. "wake up, babe."
satoru continued to groan. you peeled his arms off of you and stepped out of the bed. he watched you make your way into the bathroom. you were wearing one of his white uniform button ups and his briefs. your messy hair cascaded down your back. you were a sight to behold in the morning. satoru felt like he was hiding a national treasure in his room whenever you were with him.
satoru reached his arms under his pillow, stretching his long body. he called out to you, "did i ever mention that you look great in my clothes?"
you rolled your eyes at him before shooting back a half-grin. god, he loved that crooked smile of yours. he gave you a scoff in return. you ran the water so you could wash your face and brush your teeth.
after you and satoru spent the early morning sneaking kisses on each other and getting ready together, you both walked over to tsumiki and megumi's room to get them ready for the day. you took care of megumi as satoru took care of tsumiki. while you were buttoning up megumi's shirt, you watched as satoru brushed and tied tsumiki's hair into two perfect pigtails.
the 7 year old reached for her jar of butterfly clips and handed them to satoru. he picked out two pink ones to clip into her hair, making sure her bangs were out of her face.
you patted megumi's shoulders, smiling at the younger fushiguro, "there we go, megumi. you look so handsome in your new shirt."
megumi blushed, looking down at his tan-colored button-up. "gojo-sensei chose it for me."
"lookin' good there, kiddo." satoru smiled at him and then turned to you, "doesn't tsumiki look great too, sweetheart?"
you smiled back at satoru and tsumiki, "of course she does. she's my little girly girl."
tsumiki twirled around in her new pink dress. she was so darn cute. satoru bent down to tighten the straps on her shoes. he pat her head as she hugged his leg. the kids were so tiny compared to satoru. you really did look like little family when you were out in public together.
after getting ready, tsumiki and satoru led the way to the dining hall while you and megumi trailed behind them. the four of you grabbed breakfast before heading out into the city.
at the elementary school
you could hear the whispers about you and satoru through your spirit birds. the other mothers were asking each other if you and satoru were actually tsumiki and megumi's real parents, how old you two were, and many other unsolicited questions and thoughts.
you had all the registration paperwork for megumi and tsumiki in your backpack as you sat down at a pavilion table to fill out the remaining papers with satoru.
"babe—" you turned to satoru who was watching tsumiki and megumi play on the playground, "should i put you down as the primary emergency contact?"
satoru had a red lollipop in his mouth that he got from the front desk, his sunglasses were resting on his nose bridge. he took the lollipop out of his mouth to reply to you, "sure, sweetheart. but why not put yourself down?"
"well—" you bit your lip in hesitation, "i was thinking that since you can teleport, you could get here faster if anything happened to the kids." you rested your chin on your hand and leaned into him. he put his arm around you, pulling you closer.
"makes sense to me."
you and satoru watched the kids in adoration as tsumiki already made new friends on the playground. she was prancing around the field while megumi was hanging on the monkey bars.
two women approached you, startling you and satoru out of your focused adoration for the kids.
"excuse me. are you those children's mother?" the woman pointed at tsumiki and megumi. "—the one with the brown hair and the blue hair."
"we're their guardians." you introduced you and satoru, "i'm (y/n) and this is my boyfriend, satoru."
the second mother playfully hit the first mother on the shoulder, "see? i told you that they're too young to be their parents. she barely looks like she's in high school."
"why do you ask?" satoru asked defensively, furrowing his eyebrows.
you put your hand on satoru's arm, a motion to tell him to fall back and that you'd handle this. he always came to your defense when it came to you or the kids… but he knew that you were on a different level of overprotective when it came to tsumiki and megumi. satoru just sat back and continued to watch the show.
"well, this school is a very prestigious school for children. we know almost everyone and all the families who attend here... and we've never seen you two around or those two kids." the second mother sneered at the both of you.
the first mother feigned shock, "they don't have a mother or father... that's so sad."
you glared at the two women, "just because we aren't their biological parents doesn't mean that they aren't being properly cared for. satoru and i have given them everything they need and they are in a loving environment."
you weren’t sure how loving an environment like the tokyo jujutsu high dorms actually was… but you and satoru made it clear to tsumiki and megumi that you both loved and cared for them, and that if they ever needed or wanted anything, it was theirs. the world was their oyster with you and satoru by their sides.
"well then. that's good to hear." the first mother started to turn her back towards you, "it was a pleasure meeting you, miss (y/n)?"
"(l/n)." you corrected her. just because she was older than you didn't mean that she could call you by your first name.
"we hope to see you around at school events." the second mother interrupted, "we volunteer at the school quite a bit. parents... or shall i say... guardians that volunteer help their kids gain recognition within the school. i'm sure we'll see you around if you don't want your kids to fall behind."
the two women started to walk away, snickering between themselves. satoru waved them off and patted your thigh to try to calm you down.
"just ignore them, sweetheart. they’re just old women whose husbands don’t actually love them." he tried to comfort you, grabbing your hand to kiss your knuckles. “—and i love you, so you’ll never be like them.”
you motioned one of your spirit birds to fly forward, following the two women. satoru sighed in defeat, he knew you weren't going to just ignore them. he started to grin though, this was one of things that made you so attractive in his eyes. it was that fire in you. you never stepped down from a fight.
"that blue haired child looks like he's going to be trouble. look at him! he looks like a delinquent." "we need to make sure that our children don't get involved with them. we don't even know what their guardians do for a living." "how are they even paying for tuition?" "i doubt those two can even afford to pay for the tuition here. they’re just teenagers!"
you grit your teeth, jaw clenched in anger, lips pursed. satoru could feel your cursed energy waver. he nudged you one last time, "babe, come on. let’s just go back to filling out paperwork."
"you heard what they said about our kids."
you slammed your pen against the table. you got up and walked towards the two women. satoru signed and folded his arms to watch the remainder of the show. he wished he had popcorn for this. he was ready to hold you back if needed, but he actually liked seeing you get feisty like this. he knew you could hold your own against anyone, including him.
"excuse me!" you called out to the two women, "hey! you two!"
the two mothers turned around, looking back at you, appalled at your approach.
"say one more thing about megumi and tsumiki!" you pointed at them with your index finger. "let's see what happens!"
"don't you know where our families come from? ever heard of the (l/n) clan or the gojo clan? the audactiy of you two to question how we can afford to pay for tuition. their tuition was paid fully in cash. you can ask the cashier over there." you pointed towards the cashier's window.
the first mother stammered, she was shocked that you confronted them, "well, i—"
"just because i'm young doesn't mean that i can't be a good mother to megumi and tsumiki." you snapped at them, "those two 'delinquents' mean the world to me. i can provide them whatever they need or want in order for them to live a happy life. maybe you two should focus on your own children instead of mine."
"that's enough out of you!" the second mother snapped back at you, "who do you think you are? who taught you how to be so disrespectful towards your elders?"
"—can i ask what's going on here?" a man with gray hair and grey eyes approached the three of you, interrupting the cat fight. satoru jumped in his seat and started to whistle, pretending not to have been listening on the sidelines.
"oh! principal kinomoto!" the first woman ran to his side, "this rude child was just causing a scene!"
principal kinomoto recognized you, "(y/n) (l/n)?"
"hi principal kinomoto!" you waved.
the two mothers looked at you in shock. they were surprised that you and the principal were already acquainted, wondering how you knew him.
"what's all the commotion about?" the principal asked again.
"well, these two had some stuff to say about my kids." you reported back to the grey haired principal, pointing at the two women.
"i see… is this true?" the principal turned to the two, "you know we don't tolerate this type of behavior. the (l/n) clan donates heavily to all the schools in tokyo. let's not jeopardize their generous contributions to our school due to some unwarranted comments."
the two women's jaw dropped. they were speechless. they absolutely knew about the (l/n) clan. they just didn’t think you were from that (l/n) clan.
"(y/n), we have much to catch up on. i saw that you and satoru are enrolling two children here."
"what's up, principal!" satoru called out. satoru made his way to you and the principal. he put his arm around your waist and shook hands with principal kinomoto.
he introduced satoru again to the two women, "mrs. fujiwara, mrs. yoshida. this is satoru gojo. the gojo clan also donate tremendously to this school as well. as a matter of fact, they're the ones that paid for the new library last fall."
"you two may leave now, i have to speak with the principal." you said to the two women, "you should go find your children."
mrs. fujiwara and mrs. yoshida quickly turned around and called for their children from the playground. it looked like they wouldn't be bothering you or your kids any time soon.
"ignore those two. they’re known for their gossip. let's sit down and catch up." principal kinomoto ushered you and satoru back to the table you were sitting at. "(y/n), how is touya? i haven't seen him in so long!"
"he's great. he's working on becoming the head of the household."
"—and are you at jujutsu high with satoru?"
satoru ruffled your hair, "yep, she is! we're third years now. gonna graduate soon!"
"so tell me about these kids you're enrolling." the principal peered over at the playground.
"would you like to meet them?" you asked with a smile. “they’re just the best kids.”
satoru called out to the two fushiguros, "hey! megumi! tsumiki! can you guys come here real quick?"
megumi jumped down from the monkey bars, tsumiki slid down from the metal slide she was on. they both ran towards you and satoru. tsumiki jumped into satoru's arms while megumi attached himself to your side.
"principal kinomoto, meet megumi and tsumiki fushiguro." you introduced the two fushiguros to their future principal with a cheeky smile, "—they're mine and satoru's kids."
"kiddos, say hi to principal kinomoto." satoru said, "he's a good friend of ours."
principal kinomoto reached his hand out for a handshake, "nice to meet you two."
you and satoru watched as tsumiki and megumi nervously shook hands with their principal and said hi. they were so cute in the way they interacted with him.
after getting acquainted, you shoo'd them off, “you two can go back and play now.”
they quickly smiled and waved, running back to play on the playground with their new friends. once megumi was back on the monkey bars, you turned to the principal, "principal kinomoto, i do have some concerns."
"what's on your mind, (y/n)?"
"i'm not worried about tsumiki fitting in, but i am worried about megumi." you sighed, hoping that megumi would be okay in school without you.
satoru added, "—megumi might cause a little trouble for you, principal."
the grey haired principal laughed, "is he a troublemaker like you, satoru?"
"you have no idea." you scoffed.
"the kid's a zen'nin with the ten shadows technique." satoru mentioned.
principal kinomoto looked at you and satoru, "you don't say?" he adverted his attention to megumi on the playground, "what shikigami has he tamed have so far?"
"just the demon dogs. he's starting to see nue and gamma though. so don't be surprised if you see two puppies named shiro and kuro on school grounds." satoru chuckled.
principal kinomoto was actually a grade one jujutsu sorcerer and was in the same class as touya. after graduation, he left to work as a non-sorcerer because he didn't like the mental toll being a jujutsu sorcerer put on him. he ended up going into education because he loved kids. if he couldn't save children from curses, he would save them another way, through education. him and his wife, mrs. akita, ran the school that you were enrolling megumi and tsumiki at. it was satoru's idea to register the kids here knowing the ties they had with the jujutsu society.
“don't worry. tsumiki and megumi will be taken care of here.”
"thanks so much, principal." you let out a relieved sigh, "that's one less thing to worry about."
"being a parent is hard," the principal laughed, pointing at you and satoru, "—but you two... when did that become a thing?"
"she fell in love with me at first sight." satoru interjected with a cocky smirk.
"—absolutely not." you threw an ice shard at his infinity, "i can't get rid of him... it's been almost two years now? satoru broke my domain expansion from the outside when i was sparring with touya. that's how we first met." (read 'love at first fight' here)
principal kinomoto teased you both, "—so it was love at first sight?"
"more like first fight. satoru didn't even like me at first." you told the principal. he was enthralled with your love story.
satoru rolled his eyes, "—that's not true!"
"i'm actually surprised that your brother didn't kill satoru when he found out you two were dating." principal kinomoto shrugged.
"god, touya and satoru love each other. they're bestfriends now. sometimes i think touya loves satoru more than me."
"well, give your brother my regards," principal kinomoto got up from his seat, "i have to get back to the office. i'm sure i have plenty of parents waiting to meet with me."
"take care." you waved.
"yeah, take care. we'll send the check for the monthly donation this week." satoru called out to the principal. you and satoru were now in charge of the clans’ donations to the school since you'd be visiting the school often.
principal kinomoto waved and brushed you two off, "don't worry about it. take your time with the donations. akita and i are happy to have megumi and tsumiki starting at the school."
you and satoru watched as the principal walked away from the pavilion table. you both sighed in relief. you didn’t think that being ‘parents’ at such a young age was in the cards for you and satoru... but he just had to bring home two adorable children for you to raise.
"that was hot." satoru giggled. the corner of his eyes started to wrinkle as he tried holding back his boisterous laugh.
"what was hot?" you asked.
"the way you stood up to those two moms." satoru said, "i love when you get feisty."
you leered at him, a cheshire grin spreading across your face, "—oh you love when i get feisty?"
"—but not with me!" satoru quickly said with his palms up in defense.
you rolled your eyes at him and finished filling out megumi and tsumiki's registration paperwork while the sly sorcerer snuck tender kisses on your cheek.
you scribbled your signature on the last line. after a moment, you turned to satoru, “should i join the parent-teacher association?”
EXTRA:
“(y/n), can i get the 64 pack of crayons with the sharpener in the back?” megumi asked in hopes that you'd say yes. he had always wanted the 64 pack of crayons.
satoru looked at the younger fushiguro, “you only need 12 crayons to color. who do you think you are? picasso?”
you glared at satoru and turned to megumi, “yes, you can have the 64 pack, megumi. get one for tsumiki too. and your gojo-sensei will pay for it."
"wha—hey!" satoru called out as you, megumi, and tsumiki walked away from him to head to the next aisle.
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© 2023 ASDFGHJKLMALS — ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PLEASE DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, OR REPOST MY WORK.
DIVIDERS PROVIDED BY @/ANLIAN-AISHANG
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leighsartworks216 · 7 months
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I love how you write for Astarion, my request is (as long as your comfortable with it) Tav tends to have nightmares from a past sexual assault, one that they've opened up and told Astarion about once their relationship became more official and he opened up. One night, Tav wakes up with a scream bolt upright in their bedroll, hyperventilating. Everyone comes to check on them, but it's Astarion who realizes what's going on immediately coming to their aid and comforting them.
I did not really reference what the dream was about, but I did imply it was about somebody who hurt Tav/Reader in a few lines
This is also my first time writing any of the companions besides Astarion so I hope I did okay with them lol
Astarion x gn!Tav/Reader
Warnings: panic attack, ugly crying, protective Astarion
Word Count: 704
Main Masterlist
Baldur's Gate 3 Masterlist
AO3
Tag List Form
The scream shatters the quiet of the night. Everyone rushes toward the sound, weapons drawn and spells at the tip of their tongues. They find no monster, no animal, no criminal - only their leader, sitting up in their bedroll, sobbing uncontrollably.
Astarion is the first to recognize what’s happened. He rushes from his tent to your side, hands held in front of him though not touching you. His face is serious, eyes focused on you with an intensity he shared with no one else.
“It’s alright, darling,” he coos as calmly as he can. “Do you hear me? You’re safe.”
Your whole body shakes. A cold sweat soaks your sleep clothes and sticks your hair to your head. Your breaths come in rapid, shallow. You don’t look at him. The spawn isn’t even sure you see him. Perhaps all you perceive him as is the monster of your past.
He slowly takes your hand in his, loose enough that you could pull away with no resistance. You almost do - until your eyes, wide and teary and fearful, meet his. Whether it is fear of the monster you see in his face or a desperate plea for help, he can’t tell. “Can you hear me, dove? You’re alright. You’re safe.”
Gale dashes over with a canteen of water. Karlach drops her battle axe in favor of rushing to your side. Shadowheart starts kneeling by your side, hoping she can provide any help. Wyll is just starting to approach when Astarion nearly growls and waves them all away with a hand. “Go away! Give them space!”
“They’re-!”
“Not physically injured,” he barked at the cleric. “They’re panicking. Back. Up.”
Shadowheart frowns, but she gets up and backs a few paces away. Gale drops the water by Astarion and retreats. Karlach has to be stopped by Wyll - too blinded by her worry to register how angry Astarion is. Lae’zel watches on, weapon still drawn.
Your eyes have been fixed on him the whole time. The sneer drops once they’re far enough away from you.
“It’s alright, dear, just breathe.” He pulls your hand to his chest. There’s no heartbeat, but, though he doesn’t need to, he makes a show of breathing deeply. His lungs and chest expand with each breath. “Come on, love, breathe with me. You’re safe.”
His words finally seem to reach you. You wheeze and choke as you force your breathing to slow down and follow his. He’s sure his heart would have stuttered with relief if it still beat. “That’s it. That’s it.”
The entire camp is anxious as they watch on. It takes much too long before you’re beginning to breathe normally. Your face is red and wet and snotty from crying, but you don’t have the energy or presence to care. Nobody else does, either.
“You’re safe,” Astarion repeats for the up-teenth time. He squeezed your hand gently. “Nobody is going to hurt you. Alright?”
You shakily nod. The fact you could answer eased his concern immensely. The haze of your nightmare finally lifted. You were now all-too-aware of your sweat-drenched body, of the tears on your face, and of everyone else watching your breakdown. You sighed, sapped of energy. “I’m sorry,” you croaked.
“Don’t you dare,” he chastises immediately.
You sniff as you lean forward, dropping your head against his shoulder. He’s not wholly comforted with the knowledge that snot was getting on his shirt, but, he supposed, it was better than leaving you to suffer. He’d be cleaning it first light, though. He wraps an arm around your back and tangles his other hand in your hair. Your hand falls from his chest and around his waist, where you weakly hang on to the fabric of his shirt.
Over your shoulder, Astarion nods to the others. They’re reluctant to leave, but if they stay they risk being yelled at by him again. Karlach is the last to leave. She gives him a pointed look - silently telling him that she demands answers in the morning - and he nods, if only to get her to leave you alone.
“You’re alright, dear. I’m here.”
“Don’t leave,” you whimpered into his shoulder.
He stroked your hair. “I won’t,” he promised. “I’m right here.”
---
Tag List:
@hypopxia @flsalazar @beverlybeav @angelofthorr @emiemiemiii @lynnlovesloki @aurasyn @furblrwurblr @cappsikle @mjmygd @thegirlsadventuresinwonderland @kindadolly @httyd-chocolate @bloopthebat @pandimoostuff @chesb0red @black-star1472 @sessils @olitheghostboy-blog @puppyg1rl666 @maruichio @cyber-dump-171 @katharynmarie @twinkliker3000
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scorpioriesling · 13 days
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Casual (pt. 2)
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Pairings: Azriel x reader
Warnings: semi angst, smut, 18+, underage readers dni
Summary: After a night out with your friend from work, you meet not only one attractive male from the inner circle, but two. One who has quite the eye for you and plans to do something about it.
SR’s Note: Here is part 2! Please read part 1 first if you haven’t yet. This part is 75% smut, 25% plot lol. Part 1 is almost all plot and the slow burning lead up to what we’ve all been waiting for, hehe. Enjoy xoxo. Tagging those that have waited so patiently for me to put this one out: @cdeluca04 @azrielsgirll
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Your skin prickles as a chill runs down your spine, though the air inside Rita’s is anything but cold. The two hands in front of you on the bar remain, as the presence behind you shifts to your right just a fraction. You glance over your shoulder, catching sight of a smooth chest peaking through an unbuttoned black shirt. You aren’t left guessing for long, as the deep voice behind you chuckles and slinks away. A flash of disappointment at the retraction, replaced by excitement as the seat next to you. You continue to keep your eyes trained on the bar in front of you, until you feel your stool being dragged toward the seat beside you, and then spun to face your new friend.
“It’s rude to not look people in the eyes.” He says lowly. His hand reaches out, taking your chin and tilting it up so you’re forced to stare him dead in the face. And-
Gods.
He is magnificent.
Your eyes roam over him entirely, taking in his perfect cheekbones, his dark hair hanging low over his forehead, and his hazel eyes flecked with gold that bore into yours. His full lips tilt to one side, curving up into a smile and he reveals a few perfectly straight, white teeth.
“You’re much more exquisite up close…” he trails off, eyes searching yours as if he’s waiting for you to say something.
“Y/N.” You introduce. His eyes seem to glimmer at the mention of your name, and you can’t help but to blush at the compliment and the fact that this beautiful man is drinking you in as though you’re the last glass of water in Prythian. You swallow, wishing you had a glass yourself right about now.
“And… what’s your name?” You ask, hating how shy you sound. What happened that you’d lost all your confidence between when his friend was over here just moments ago? You needed to remember that version of Y/N and go back to it — it sure seemed to work on Cassian.
He clears his throat, his hand now moving to the side of your jaw and thumb brushing your cheek. “Azriel,” he says. You lean into the hand he holds against your face, humming in pleasure. He chuckles at the sight, leaning forward a bit.
“Are you planning to stay here much later?” He asks. You shake your head, and his hand drops. He trails a finger down your neck, your collarbone, over your shoulder, and down your arm.
“Good,” he says. He’s made it to your palm, and he takes it in his. “I was hoping to get out of here,” he brings your palm to his lips, kissing once and staring at you through his dark lashes. You can’t help but shudder. How could you say no?
“I live quite close, actually if we wanted to-“
“Fantastic idea.” He’s already standing, slinking an arm around your waist. You reel in a breath at the sudden closeness, your chest pressed flush against his. His tanned skin smells of mint and the sea, so clean but you can tell he has been active tonight. With a hand on your lower back, he’s gazing down at you, the same smirk returned to his beautiful lips.
“Ready to go, darling?”
゚:* ✧・゚
Before you could register what was happening, you’d disappeared into a veil of black smoke and reappeared inside the front door of your studio apartment, gripping the front of Azriel’s shirt tight. You looked around, realizing this was in fact your home and he had in fact winnowed you into it.
Both of you.
“Oh! Uh,” You released the death-grip you had on him, and he let go of your waist, the place where his warm hand had been now left cold. You’d kind of wished he wouldn’t.
He began to stride in, taking in the wall decor, the large windows overlooking Velaris, your plush white bed in one corner. He turned back to look at you, and you shrugged at him.
“I mean… this is me.” You say, defeated. Azriel smiles softly at the expression you have on your face, as though you’re embarrassed since you’ve resorted to looking at your feet. In two steps, he’s in front of you, one hand on your hip bone and one tilting your chin up to meet his eyes once more.
“A beautiful girl like you shouldn’t hide your face so much,” he says. You blush, giggling a little at the corniness. He can’t help but huff a laugh, then lean in close. Your confidence surges as you raise onto your tip toes to close the gap between the two of you, softly pressing your lips to his. Unlike how he smells, he tastes deliciously of aged whisky and fizz, and the way in which he begins moving his mouth against yours makes your head spin. His lips are soft, but dominant as he pulls you impossibly closer to his chest. His tongue plays against your bottom lip, and you accept the invitation by playing along too.
It doesn’t take long before he’s moving you backward, and the backs of your thighs meet the soft duvet of your bed and you sit, pulling Azriel on top of you. He continues to explore your mouth, one hand now beside your head to hold himself up and the other beginning its descent. You softly groan as his fingers trace down the curve of your breast, continuing down the side of your stomach and grabbing your hip when he meets it. He breaks free from the kiss then, breathless and peers down at you with nothing less than a lust-filled stare.
“Is this…” he starts, his hips resting atop yours grinding into you softly. You can feel his hard cock through the confines of the tight pants he’s wearing, creating friction in the perfect spot against your throbbing heat through your dress. His gaze drifts down towards where he’s already pleasuring you, as soft pants leave your lips. “Is this okay?”
“Yes. Yes please Azriel. I need more.” You beg. His eyes seem to darken at your words, and he sits back on his knees then, still holding your stare. You whine at the loss of contact, but it won’t be long. He grabs your hips roughly, pulling you toward the edge of the bed. Your dress is harshly tugged from your body, and you sit up on your hands to held him pull it over your head. He lets out a small gasp when you’re finally fully bare for him, minus the tiny string of lace considered underwear you still adorn. His hand grabs your throat, pushing you back against the bed as his breath once again fans your ear, sending goosebumps over your skin.
“Gods, Y/N,” he says. It comes out as almost a plea, and you can’t help but feel more turned on at the fact that this beautiful male is actually pleading for you. He begins pressing slow, wet kisses down from below your ear to your jaw, and continues down the column of your throat. Once he reaches your collarbone, he slowly makes his way to your chest, taking one nipple in his mouth and swirling his tongue around the hardened bud. Your ass presses into the bed as you arch into him, and his hand finds the curve of your back to hold you close to his body. You can feel his cock growing with need against the inside of your thigh, held back by the leather pants he’s wearing.
Your hands slide into the silky strands of his ebony hair, and you run your fingers through it as he shows your other breast the same attention before continuing his descent, finding eye contact again with you. He releases the hold around you, his fingers pulling on the lacy undergarment until he has full access to your dripping heat. He lets out a dark laugh, eyes flicking from your core back up to your eyes, and you peer down at him from your position on your propped up elbows. He moves to the floor, settling on his knees and pulls you to the very edge of the bed so your legs dangle off.
He starts kissing a trail once more from your left knee, slow and tantalizing up your inner thigh. With each kiss, you writhe beneath him, needing him to please you more intensely.
“Giddy girl, are we?” He drawls, laughing once he finally meets the spot you’ve been waiting for. His breath sends a cool wave over your burning heat, and you suck your bottom lip between your teeth. The sight alone has Azriel wanting to skip all of this and fuck you straight into your mattress.
But, he can’t let you know that.
Instead, he dives in — licking a stripe up your slick, and you suck in a breath. He watches as you clench around nothing with need for him, and he works hard not to get off on just this. He needed you; but he wanted you to have him, first. Wrapping one hand around where your ass met your leg, his hand rested atop your thigh, holding it open for him to feast. The other began sliding a finger up and down your soft folds, only a few times before pushing in. The little mewl that escaped your lips had him pushing himself against the bottom of the bed frame, creating friction for himself.
“Fuck…” He breathed. His gaze wasn’t focused on you as his lips met the apex, his tongue swirling a few times and then sucking the swelling bundle into his mouth. You couldn’t help but pull on the soft tendrils between your fingers, one elbow still propping you up for a better view.
His eyes drifted up to you, his tongue attacking your clit as his finger pumped in and out of you. He added a second, curling them as he drug them out each time which in turn drug filthy moans from your mouth. It wasn’t long before you could feel your stomach beginning to tighten, the pleasure becoming too much.
“Oh Azriel… I, I’m-“ You screw your eyes shut, begging to hold on to your release, to feel the pleasure as long as your body would let you. At the sound of his name, it’s almost too much for him it seems; he pulls both fingers from you, detaching his lips and leaving you cold and empty from the loss of contact.
He quickly stands, yanking off his shirt in one motion and scooting out of his pants in another. He’s leaning over you in seconds, and you take him in.
He’s huge.
“Az I don’t know if I-“
“You can take it.” He growls, pumping his length in his hand. You instinctively draw your knees back, your feet wrapping around his toned waist as he teases your entrance with the head of his leaking cock. He roughly crashes his mouth to yours again, his hand holding himself steady next to your head while he attacks your mouth. His teeth pull at your bottom lip, and your eyes meet his as he pulls away.
Standing up to his full height, he lines himself up with your entrance, ever so slowly pushing his hard member inside. You can’t help but gasp at the feeling, eyes trained on where the two of you are now connected. He growls, pushing in more and allowing you to adjust, before he’s finally fully inside of you. His hands grasp your thighs, and he sucks his own lip between his teeth, groaning at the feel of you wrapped around his cock.
“Fuck Azriel please m-“
Without warning, he pulls out almost fully and slams back into you, pulling a scream of pleasure from you. He repeats this again, and again, and his eyes rake over you in a predatory gaze.
“You can’t say my name like that, baby,” he says, thrusting in again, and again. “…and not expect me to fuck you how I want to.” He pants, his pace quickening ever so slightly. He smiles down at you, his gleaming perfect teeth shining in the moonlight. “How I need to.”
Your head lolls back, small groans coming from your lips each time Azriel pushes into you. His skin is slapping unashamedly loud against yours, and small grunts drawl from his mouth as he grips your hips tighter. You raise your head to meet his eyes once more, and watch as he moves a thumb to your clit again, tracing circles into the muscle.
A cry of pleasure erupts from your chest. “Azriel, gods you feel so good…” He’s starting to rut into you with frenzy, and you can feel his release quickly impending as you’re almost over the edge yourself.
“Mmmm..” he groans darkly. “You like it when I fuck toy like this?” He slams into you, only pulling out a few inches now. He lets out a shaky breath. “Fucking you like you’re all mine? Hmm?” He pinches your aching clit between his thumb and forefinger, and you gasp once more, eyes widening. The coil in your stomach is impossibly tight, and you know you’re going to release any second now.
“Gods Y/N this pussy is all mine,” he slams in one, two, three more times, rubbing circles into your clit. Your legs are shaking around his waist, trying to hold onto the tether that is your release long enough to enjoy these last few moments with him.
“Oh… oh fuck, fuck Azriel I can’t I’m so close… I’m going to-“ You cry out in delight again, as he leans over you, clasping the hand that was on your clit over your throat. His mouth is open in an ‘o’ as you clench around him, your release coating him entirely as warmth spreads through your body.
“You’re so fucking perfect, baby-“ he lets out a whimper, feeling you squeezing him in all the right ways. “Oh gods…” his pace slows as he slams into you twice more, his release painting your walls from the inside as you ride him through yours. He stays inside of you, feeling the last few twitches of his dick as you take every drop. His eyes are only focused on yours, your fucked out expression confirmation of how good he’s made you feel.
After a few moments, he slowly pulls out of you, and you feel a bit of the mixture sliding out with his action. He awkwardly looks around, then chuckles sheepishly at you.
“Uhmmm….” he says. “Is there a towel or cloth somewhere that I could get for you?” He asks. He’s in your home, asking if there’s anything he could get for you.
You scramble underneath him, cheeks reddening with embarrassment. “Oh uh, yeah I’ll go get one.” You say, making way to the bathroom. Too lost in the moment to realize you’re a dripping mess, you think.
When you return with the cloth, Azriel is standing with his hands on his waist. He towers over you as you hand him one, and clean yourself off with another. You hold out a hand when he’s done, and he shakes his head.
“Please,” he says, taking yours from you. You point to the bathroom where your clothing hamper waits, and he walks inside with the cloths. You drink him in as he goes, and plop down onto the bed when he swings the door open to return.
Your head starts spinning, and you glance at the clock beside your bed. 2:58. Geez, how long had you guys been at it? Feeling the overwhelming tiredness take you over, you scoot towards your pillows and let out a sigh. Glancing towards Azriel, you see he’s gathering his clothes, and you instantly get the feeling you don’t want him to leave quite yet.
“Hey, um,” you start. His eyes meet yours, a hopeful gleam in them and you think to yourself, maybe he doesn’t want to leave either. “You can stay, if you would like to.” A soft smile appears on his face, and he glances at his hands, toying with his shirt in them.
“I mean… I don’t want to impose,” he says. Nonetheless, he’s already walking over to the other side of the bed, pulling back the covers and sliding in next to you.
“Maybe,” you say, his hazel eyes ablaze in the moonlight streaming in from your open windows. He lays facing you, a hand snaking around your waist to pull you close. “Maybe I want you to stay.”
゚:* ✧・゚
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cosmicstarlatte · 9 months
Text
Coffee Shop (Obey Me!)
━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━
You start a new job at a coffee shop in a popular plaza. You can't help but look forward to a certain regular. ♡
»Characters: Demon Bros + Dia + Barb
»Tags: Fluff, Bulleted Style, GN Reader, LeviLeviLevi-
»Notes: lol when was the last time I made a bulleted fic that wasn't a shitpost???🤯 Just simple short fluff lol, reblogs are appreciated + motivating ♡
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Lucifer:
Always orders a cafe con leche every morning
Keeps interactions short but you learned his name
Always so serious but he does look like a business man
A very very handsome business man cough
After working there for a little bit he admits he likes the way you make his drink & hates when you guys miss each other on days off
One day he comes in normal clothes & you got caught off guard when he made it to the register
"It's my day off but I was craving my usual. I'm glad to see you're here."
Pleaseee you gotta be blushing right now alalfkfldk
You notice the record store bag he's holding & start a fun conversation while its slow
It does get busier & unfortunately have to cut the conversation to both your disappointments
"We can continue this later...maybe over dinner if you're available?"
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Mammon:
Usually gets an icy blended drink, the flavor changes frequently
You see him every other day, it looks like he works at a retail store in the plaza
You thought he was cute & funny despite how loud he could be
One day he defends you against a really rude customer
You say your thank yous & give him his drink for free that day
"Yeah I guess I am a hero. Heroes get free drinks all the time though, ya?"
You couldn't help but laugh & accidentally let slip "you're really cute!"
He starts choking on his drink, stuttering & blushing
He goes silent for a moment before asking, "whaddaya say to a date one of these days?"
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Levi:
Usually orders sweet drinks & likes trying seasonal/limited time things
You've seen him at his job at the anime store in the plaza, since you visit there sometimes
You two are on friendly terms even though he can be awkward
You think he's very cute though, especially when he talks about his passions
You felt like you two were dancing around eachother so you decide to make a move
You drew a Gundam robot on his drink & wrote 'Gun-DAM you're cute!'
You nervously handed the drink & he took it without noticing the drawing on it
You watched as he left the shop,took another sip, then stop as he looked at his drink
You could see he was happily freaking out but then abruptly stop
He looked back to the shop & you waved a shy hello
He ran back inside to make sure, "S-sorry is this a mistake? W-was this for someone else??"
"Look on the bottom"
He raised the cup & looked under
Levi, AkuCon this weekend?
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Satan:
Usually orders a simple cappuccino but will add a flavored syrup occasionally
Comes in often on his breaks
You've seen him working at the bookstore in the plaza
He looks like a simple guy yet very charming
You always notice a book on him & one day you decide to ask what he's reading
You learn you read the same things & start having fun conversations every time he stops by
Eventually he asks you if you'd be able to give your thoughts on his writing
"Sure, I'd be happy to read it if you bring it!"
He gave you a flirty smile
"Actually I was thinking maybe we could hang out...like somewhere that's not here?"
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Asmo:
Always orders an iced vanilla oat milk latte
You see him every few days, really friendly customer that loves to chat & you become friends quick even though you want more
You find out he works at a nearby agency & is an up & coming model
You felt a little intimidated, he could be really famous one day!
Nevertheless you treat him just the same even as those around him changed, he lets you know how grateful he is
One day he comes in upset & tells you the agency is moving across town to a bigger location so he won't be able to see you there anymore
At the same time both of you blurt out
"I still wanna see you!"
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Beel:
You never know with this guy
He works in the sports store across from the cafe
He's always indecisive with the menu & one day just tells you to make whatever
You're his fave barista, he thinks you make the best drinks either way
Doesn't realize he just likes everything & has a crush on you
You can't help but get excited when he looks excited to see you golden retriever energy
You find out he's a foodie type & you guys talk about the local spots around town
"Would you like to check out the new sandwich store that opened a few doors down? Uh...like, maybe a date?"
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Belphie:
Usually orders a hot regular latte but occasionally orders hot chocolate
He appears to be a student as he comes in often to study & always looks tired
One day on your break you decide to chat him up & offer help on the subject he was struggling with
He thought you were cute & was thankful for your help
After a few weeks of tutoring (+some heavy flirting), he passed his exam flawlessly
"Actually can you help me with one other thing?"
"Yeah, what?"
"Would you like to go on a date sometime?"
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Diavolo:
Has a new favorite every week but really likes lattes/teas
You can tell he's important with his assistant present
You wonder why the assistant doesnt just get his order though
Anyway hes hot really friendly & chatty & can tell a few good jokes, you appreciate them!
He always seems reluctant to leave the shop which makes your heart flip
Always leaves a big tip! ... I want him to give me a big tip 😔
The two of you find out you have a lot more in common than you thought
One day he admits that these coffee runs are the things he looks forward to the most since his day is usually very busy & doesn't get much else normalcy
He lets slip that it's mainly seeing you that adds to his joy so he goes all in
"If you're interested, care to join me for dinner this weekend?"
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Barbatos:
Always large orders of a few different drinks (part of his job)
Though you notice he always orders tea for himself & likes to buy different tea blends
He's a very (cute) polite customer, one of the few
You two usually chat as you make his large order & you can't help but fall for him
Knowing he loves to buy limited release tea blends, you usually save him one before the cafe sells out
You never tell anyone about it but:
"I appreciate you always saving me one."
"Oh? How did you know!?"
"I have a friend who stopped by earlier & said it was one of those times they missed out. Yet, there always appears to be one for me even after sell-out. Thank you kindly."
You blush at being found out, "seems I've been caught!"
He chuckles & gives you another shock:
"I've been meaning to ask...will you allow me to take you out one of these days?"
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578 notes · View notes
elliespeach · 10 months
Text
tear you apart | ellie williams
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˗ˏˋ"if your friends won't watch over you, i will." ´ˎ˗
pairing ellie wiliams x fem reader synopsis ellie owns her own vinyl store and the day you wander in changes both of your lives forever. she quickly becomes infatuated with you, desperate for your love that she believes is meant to be. when things in your life begin to spiral, ellie is there to catch you, but you'd never suspect she was the reason you fell in the first place. heavily heavily based on the book/tv show "you" on netflix wordcount 4k warnings gosh where do i start, stalking both cyber and in person, ellie is obsessive, manipulative, a gaslighter, a pervert lowkey, possessive and easily jealous, she breaks into readers apartment and goes thru your stuff, shes also so delusional like top tier delulu, shes based off joe goldberg so i mean put the pieces together. this is all from her perspective, most if not all of the inner monologue is ellie's thoughts about you, the italics is verbatim what she is thinking in that very moment if that makes sense. like joe, all of her actions are justified in her mind, and she doesn't see anything wrong with them. reader has a dysfunctional family. pls lmk if i am missing something! authors note hi hello hi, i have been so excited to post this!! just wanted to clarify this rn, i am bringing in a LOT of elements from the book and show, especially in this part, if it seems very similar thats why. i don't plan on following the plot line for season one, but i needed a good base to jump off of, dont hate me. n yes, readers best friend is shauna from yellowjackets i couldn't help myself. i needed a girl group, sue me. cat is apart of this girl group, not ellie's ex along w dina, also not ellie's ex in this au lol
fuckin’ trash, ellie thought to herself, looking over the torn up vinyl in her hands. the guy who returned it obviously had no fucking clue how to take care of something. especially something so needing of love. she placed the vinyl down on the counter beside the register before stepping into the back of the store, grabbing her tools of restoration. as she rummaged through a drawer, the familiar bell rang from the front door indicating a new customer, but she ignored it and continued searching for the sandpaper she always left laying around somewhere. the last drawer she opened was the winner, taking her supplies, she emerged from the small room into the front of the store, the beads in the doorway swaying as she walked through them. 
thats when her eyes found you, examining the vinyl left on the counter. you hadn’t noticed her yet, too engrossed in the mishandled vinyl. she watched you for a moment as you looked it over, tracing the scratches that lined it. to ellie, you looked to be the definition of a nice girl. sporting a flowy sundress that laid just below your ass. nice girl who likes attention, she thought to herself, looking you up and down from afar. 
she played it cool, keeping her eyes on the sandpaper and cloth in her hands as she made her way back to the counter. you finally took notice of her when she stood in front of you. “oh, hi,” you smiled brightly, to which ellie looked up. “whoever handled this vinyl should be in jail.” a sense of humor, ellie smiled at you, letting a breathy laugh fall from her lips. and an appreciation for vinyls, rare.
“a life sentence, for sure.” she spoke, and you laughed. a laugh that was genuine, not forced by politeness. 
“can you point me to where i could find a david bowie album, ellie?” you asked sweetly, and she had to remember she wore a name tag. flirting with me and you like david bowie? ellie’s grateful its a tuesday afternoon, the store is dead. giving her more time to talk with you. you, who seemed to never stop smiling at her. 
“against the wall,” she pointed. “third box from the left.” she lets you wander over yourself, taking the time to admire the way you carry yourself. you had a pair of red, heart shaped sunglasses resting on your head. ellie could tell you liked to pay attention to details, it was evident in the way you matched your sunglasses to your dress, and she wondered just how many pairs you owned. both short dresses and uniquely designed sunglasses together. her head tilted at the thought, switching her over chewed gum to the other side of her mouth. 
you rifled through the box as ellie’s gaze pierced your back, although you were seemingly unaware. david bowie, she thought again. not another stuck up gen z who only listens to who is in the top one hundred, no. no, you were special. ellie put her focus onto the vinyl in front of her, slowly dampening it with the cloth before grinding the sandpaper over the scratches. but she kept you in her peripheral vision and she couldn’t help but notice you were struggling to find a specific one, or at least it looked like it. 
“need help?” she asked you, keeping her voice neutral.
your body turned to face her, meeting her eyes and a faux pout on your lips.“i think the only one i want isn’t here, or i’m seriously blind.” 
ellie chuckled, coming out from behind the counter, “my money’s on blind, just organized this box a few days ago.”
you huffed lightly, standing to the side while she approached you and the box. “i can’t find the rise and fall of ziggy stardust, it’s one of my favorites.”
of course it is. ellie barely looked in the box before she saw the album, pulling it out and holding it out for you. “i’ll book your eye appointment,” she said with a light grin. 
“ugh, my hero,” you gushed, taking the album from her hands gently. i’ll always be your hero, but something tells ellie that you didn’t really need her help to begin with. 
“c’mon, i’ll ring you up,” ellie led you back to the register and you placed the vinyl down on the counter lightly.
“promise i won’t do what that guy did,” you joked, reaching into your bag for your wallet. 
ellie almost wishes you would. you’d come in a few days later, apologizing for being so clumsy but asking if she could fix it for you. of course, she would say yes. how could she say no to someone like you? “you couldn’t if you tried, pretty sure he did it on purpose.” 
“what makes you say that?”
“just a hunch,” ellie shrugs, scanning the barcode on the vinyl. 
“maybe his dogs got it, or worse, his kids.” you kept eye contact as you spoke, which shocked ellie. a lot of people would break away, divert conversation, maybe even stay silent all together. but not you. 
“if that guy had kids, i’d feel bad for them,” to a lot of people, this comment would rub them the wrong way, and ellie internally cursed herself for saying it. you’re a sweetheart in her eyes, someone who wouldn’t think things like that, but again, you laughed. the transaction was almost over and she was grasping at straws, so she kept going. “guys like him blame everything on everyone else, i wouldn’t be surprised if his kids actually hated him but,” 
your head tilted, waiting for more. to ellie, it looked like you were hanging onto every word she said. and she relished in it. “–thats only if someone wanted to have kids with him, which i highly doubt.” 
“from what i’m hearing it doesn’t sound like anyone would want to,” you’re trusting my judgment. ellie’s lips curled up with your words, and she bagged the vinyl in a plastic bag. you handed her a credit card, which was decorated with flowers along with your name. and you want me to know your name. you could’ve used cash, the vinyl was less than twenty dollars. but no, ellie knew better and she knew you better. your eyes found the scratched up vinyl yet again, “but you can fix it?” 
ellie swiped the card against her own wishes. she’d give you the whole store if you asked with that pretty smile. “it’ll be back in the box within the hour, why? you like pink floyd?”
“yeah, for the most part. i haven’t listened to that album yet,” 
“i can put it on hold for you.” ellie rushes out, and she feels like she came on too strong. you could easily listen to it on spotify but she reminds herself that you’re in her store for a reason. you probably own a vinyl player, an older model you got off of facebook marketplace because the newer ones don’t match your personality. maybe a pioneer or a yamaha, and now shes thinking about how you probably dance around your room listening to music. your response breaks her from her imagination. 
“that’d be great, thanks ellie,” but she can see it so perfectly in her mind, you’d wear a big t-shirt and a dainty pair of underwear. twirling and spinning about, the t-shirt riding up as you did and as you stood in front of her in that short dress her mind seemed to unravel and she had to clear her throat. 
“anytime–” she tacked your name at the end of her words with a smile, handing back your card which you very quickly put in your wallet. her eyes glanced down for a split second, admiring how the dress pushed your tits together before bringing them back up to your face. 
“aren’t you going to tell me to have a good day?” you teased much to ellie’s enjoyment, reaching out for the bag she was holding for you. 
“have a good day,” your fingers grazed hers, and ellie knew it had to be on purpose. a flirt, and a good one at that.
“you too, ellie. i’ll be back for that album.” 
you left the store as quickly as you came, taking your sweet vanilla scent with you. ellie thought about your interaction all day, it consumed her walk home and when she entered her small apartment she fell to her couch and opened her laptop. 
plugging your name into any and all social medias was easy, who could forget a name like yours? all your accounts were public, and very quickly ellie could tell just what kind of person you were. the sweet girl who loved vinyls who had an addiction to posting online. your twitter was filled with random, obscure thoughts and always with a hashtag at the end of them. from time to time you’d tweet about where you were, and ellie tsk’d out loud to herself. anyone could find you within seconds, you need to be more careful. you seemed to tweet about everything in your life and ellie refreshed the page, wishing to see a post about the cute girl in the vinyl shop who helped you find your favorite album. 
yet, there was nothing. and for a moment it hurt her, but the more she thought about it, it was better you didn’t post about her. that means it was real for you, hope remains. 
facebook provided the basics of your family, although the account was inactive. but your parents who divorced a few years back seemed to only post about your younger siblings, leaving her to wonder if they didn’t approve of your lifestyle in the city. she stalked their pages like it was her job and at this point it felt like it was. she discovered that your two younger siblings went off to college out west and your parents even sold their home to be closer to them while still living separate lives. ellie felt pity for you, how could they just leave you behind? 
your instagram feed was an aesthetic one, pictures posted solely to appease your followers. a pretty sunset here, a mirror selfie there, a quick post about the food from the restaurant just down the road from ellie’s shop. there were also posts about your own art, colorful and detailed, just like yourself. a painting you did was the last thing you posted, but this one wasn’t like your other ones, it was black and white and had a lonely floating balloon in the center and the borders were lined with overlapping words. ellie could make out only a few of them, ‘melancholy’, ‘nobody’, and ‘distress’. 
there were lots of group pictures of you with friends. ellie could see you looked more authentic than them, who all seemed to resemble something out of a factory for young adults. you were a pearl in a sea of clams. 
out of curiosity, ellie brought herself to your friend’s pages as well. she needed to see the types of people you spent time with, seeing if they were someone she would approve of for you. one friend made an appearance more than others and she assumed that was your so-called best friend, a spunky city girl named shauna. her own instagram was like an influencer’s guide to posting online, and she seemed like someone ellie would avoid at all costs. shauna’s posts of you always had you in the background, or if you were directly in the frame it was a candid where shauna looked better. she's making herself look better at your own expense, can't you see that?   
your other friend’s social media were bland and unhelpful. ellie brought herself back to the task at hand. she typed your name into google and watched the loading screen. your name brought up a string of links all connecting back to your art pieces you’ve submitted to local papers and art galleries. an artist in new york city, aren’t you ambitious. maybe your parents didn’t like the instability of being an artist. but yet, you still pursue your passion. its admirable. 
what also popped up was a white pages link, with a few clicks, and a small charge to her credit card she found exactly what she was looking for. there wasn’t much she could do with your phone number, texting you would be creepy. there was no way for her to explain how she got it, so the next best thing was your address. which, lucky for ellie, was only six blocks from her own. 
if she could find it this easily, she needed to make sure that no one else did. which is how she found herself standing across the street from your apartment, peering into the windows that had no blinds, no curtains, no protection from the outside world. you were on full display for all of new york. first thing were doing together is buying you blinds. you were lounging around on your coach, scrolling through your phone and periodically shifting in your spot to get more comfortable. 
it was dark now, and again, luckily for ellie, someone standing on the sidewalk of new york wasn’t a weird thing to do and no one paid her any mind. for days she would stand in the same spot, studying your movements throughout your apartment. sometimes you would go to bed on the early side, but most nights you were fully awake, sipping something out of a purple mug which she could only assume was coffee, and drawing lines on a canvas. 
everytime you would take a break and scroll through your phone, ellie would refresh every social media, waiting for a post. your fingers danced on the keyboard and after a few refreshes on ellie’s end, your twitter had a new post. 
@yndoesartstuff: if anyone has tips on how not to procrastinate finishing a wip, please enlighten me
if you just put down your phone, i’m sure you could get it done.
one night she watched as you dipped your wet brush into the purple mug instead of the designated paint water cup. they didn’t even look similar, but ellie laughed to herself while you groaned, tossing your head back before getting up to dump the liquid out of the mug. this would also be the first night ellie gawked at you while your hands dipped below your shorts, she quickly looked around. no one else seemed to notice that you were pleasing yourself with your own gentle hands and her eyes found you again, sprawled out on your couch. 
your back arched, obviously hitting your sweet spot and ellie swallowed hard. blinds. were getting you blinds. 
some days, ellie was too busy with the store to watch over you and she hated herself for it. too tired to walk the six blocks and instead just looking over your social media again, looking through your friends posts to see if you’ve been up to anything. you had never come back for the album, which ellie had finished nearly two weeks ago now. but tonight, as she locked up the store she knew she was going straight to the sidewalk adjacent from your apartment. 
when she arrived at her usual spot she saw you through the windows and you looked too well put together for a night to yourself. you were dolled up and ellie liked to imagine it was for her, you’d leave your apartment and head to the store for the album you said you’d come back for weeks ago. but her hope was squashed when a cab pulled up outside your apartment and a woman who looked way too old started to walk up the steps to the building and entered the main door. ellie had been here enough to know the general look of your building's inhabitants, and this woman wasn’t one of them. maybe someone's mom, maybe she's visiting a friend. she can’t be here for you. no way. 
but through the windows, with no blinds, she saw you open your door for this woman and welcome her into your home. your mom. it has to be. ellie’s eyebrows narrowed when you pulled this woman into a hug, then pulled back and let your lips kiss hers. okay, so not your mom. who the fuck is this?
ellie, whose eyes were going from her phone to the big windows of your apartment, began to search through your online presence and found no traces of her. this mysterious woman who, now, you seemed to be having a highschool make out session with on your couch, was all over you, touching you, kissing you, and worst of all, pleasing you. that sweet smile that had previously been for ellie, was now for this woman and it made ellie’s stomach turn. but she didn’t leave, instead watched while the two of you began to peel each other's clothes off. 
were getting you blinds and were getting rid of this woman. 
the next day while she opened up her store, she couldn’t help but think about you and this woman. she was frustrated, of course. but she couldn’t blame you, obviously this woman was prying on your weaknesses for her own pleasure. taking advantage of you. it sickened her, and she had to know more. she had been through every following list she could think of and still, this woman was a mystery. and as she refreshed your twitter (a new hobby of hers), a new post popped up. 
@yndoesartstuff: lunch date with @shaunamavisxx never felt so right – at hoppers tavern
seeing that, ellie locked up shop way too early. it was fairly easy to make her way into your apartment, all she had to do was play the part. “sorry, my girlfriend hasn’t given me a key to this door yet,” she said with a friendly smile to your neighbor, who out of the kindness of his heart let her into the building. she waited until he was in his own apartment before picking your lock. 
it smelled like you once she stepped inside, and she let the aroma fill her nose as she walked around. it was messy, canvases piled up everywhere along with dirty paint brushes. clothes lined your floor from the bedroom all the way to the kitchen and she had to force herself not to clean it up for you. she examined your paintings up close, admiring how the strokes on the canvas looked. she noticed you draw a small bird in every corner, the bird is plump, uncolored and holding a small twig. it was your signature, and it matched you so well. but, what she really was after was your laptop, she found it sitting on your unmade bed. 
no password? she was shocked, and made a mental note to tell you that you needed to secure your devices. it’s almost as if you wanted her to search through it to get to know you better, and ellie did just that. it was linked to your phone and as she went through your messages they all seemed to be relatively normal. for someone like you, at least. 
loads of messages from a group chat labeled city gals, and she knew it wasn’t you who had named it being as you were funnier than that, and less basic. scrolling up, all the conversation in the chat was merely nothing of note, no mention of this woman to your friends which ellie found odd. maybe just a hookup? but even then, wouldn’t you tell your friends? 
ellie could gauge your friends' personalities through the texts they would send, shauna was most definitely the unnamed leader of this group, probably also the one who named the chat. her texts were mostly about planning activities, meanwhile the others just tacked on with fake enthusiastic responses. even yourself. 
leaving the group chat, she continued to scroll down your messages and found an unsaved phone number which seemed to be the winner. you don’t have her number saved, this is good. a lot of your texts to her went unanswered, left on seen and only responded once you’d ask for her to come over. that usually generated a reply within minutes from this woman, who ellie still didn’t know the name of. it angered her even further, realizing she was just toying you along. only using you for your body when you were so much more than that. 
ellie jotted down the unsaved number into her notes app, saving it for later when she could find out just exactly who this woman was. it was clear from the texts that she wanted nothing to do with you, and you still kept texting her like a sad puppy. it was pathetic, really, but ellie didn’t judge. she knew that your attention seeking habits were brought on by your dysfunctional family, she just wished it was her on the receiving end.
she found herself in your emails and saw you had an abundant amount of unread ones. it was a lot of spam and a waste of time, so she moved on. she decided it was best to go into your search history, restaurants, art galleries that allowed online submissions, sometimes even silly questions that ellie would most definitely answer for you if you asked. 
“how do magicians do their cutting in half tricks?” you would ask her from the couch while ellie made you both dinner. 
she’d call out from the stove, “there’s a fake table, the girl puts her legs through that. the legs you see on the other end are fake, baby.” and you would giggle sweetly as you always did, thanking her for being a know-it-all. 
but as she continued to scroll further and further down your search history, she saw that the day you two had met, you googled “vinyl stores near me” and ellie’s was the first to pop up. she thanked every star in the universe for such a coincidence, but the more she thought about it, it couldn’t have been a coincidence because to her, it was always meant to be.  
suddenly your laptop dinged and a new message appeared at the top from city gals. it was shauna and she was proposing a night out and it didn’t take long at all for the rest of the chat to respond. 
shauna: drinks at our favorite spot tonight?
dina: totally what time 
shauna: like 8 ish? 
cat: sounds good to me
shauna: im with our heavy drinker, she says yes too!! see u guys then
dina: hangin w out us :( rude 
cat: yeah wtf 
shauna: oh hush its no biggie, we’ll see you guys tonight 
ellie sat back as the texts rolled in, heavy drinker? ellie didn’t like the sound of it, and your friends seemed to think it was funny. bet they don’t even watch over you when you’re plastered, leaving you alone where anyone could hurt you. a few clicks on your instagram and she found a group mirror picture in a dirty bar bathroom, and the location clear as day at the top of the post. she confirmed it with a few other pictures and a deep dive of your twitter. gotta stop putting your location everywhere. 
ellie knew your lunch date with shauna would be ending soon and you’d return home to start getting ready for the evening. she shut your laptop down, placing it exactly where it was on the bed before and started towards the door to leave. as she was on her way out, a bright red thong caught her eye. it was so carelessly thrown between the couch and the table next to it and she stuffed them into her pocket before locking the door behind her on the way out. she knew you’d never notice, your apartment already looked like a tornado had been through it seven times over. 
she played with the string of fabric in her pocket as she walked down the sidewalk back to her place, contemplating the night to come. if your friends won't watch over you, i will.
read part two here :)
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writinghotchner · 4 months
Note
I know this is a weird request so please don't feel like you have to fill it lol. Hotch x Reader fic where Reader has a type of disability? Whether its like crippling depression/anxiety or something else, your choise! Something cute and fluffy preferably but that's also up to you!
no such thing as a "weird request" to me, i'm insane <3 and thank you for requesting!!
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fandom: criminal minds pairing: hotch x fem!reader rating: E tags: depression, mentions of anxiety
you're on the couch wrapped in the thickest blanket you could find when you hear the front door open and close.
usually, you'd greet your boyfriend at the door, kiss him, ask him about his day, discuss dinner plans and all the usual adult things an adult couple does.
but today you can't make yourself move. that usual spark of joy that lightening strikes its way through your spine when you know he's home isn't there. the excitement to run to the front door to kiss him stupid like you would normally do isn't there. what's there, though, is the soul numbing feeling of absolutely nothingness. you don't feel sad, you don't feel happy, you quite literally feel numb- nothing. so you don't move.
if aaron notices, he doesn't say anything. instead, he makes his way over to you and leans over the back of the couch to kiss your blanket covered head. he doesn't say anything, and you surely don't say anything. you hear him shuffle by, assuming he's going to the bedroom to change out of his suit like he normally does.
a few minutes later, he reappears in black sweatpants and a basic plain white t-shirt. he sits at the end of the couch and lifts you feet onto his lap and gives them a little squeeze.
you've been together long enough for him to know that this is just something that happens. nothing necessarily triggers it, and he knows he didn't do anything wrong so he's not quick to jump on you and ask questions and plead to know how to "fix it". you're beyond thankful for that. you discussed how bad your depression can get when you first got together a few years ago and he completely understood. of course he did, after finding out everything this man had been through, of course he knows a thing or two about being depressed.
"have you eaten today?" you hear him ask, the blanket covering your entire head making it sound like he's underwater.
you want to answer him. you want him to know you aren't ignoring him and that it's not his fault, even if he knows and understands, the anxiety of it all makes it all crush your insides a little bit more.
one day he's going to get sick of this and leave.
after a beat, you unwrap the top half of yourself from your cocoon and stare up at the ceiling and then eventually look over at him. he flicks you a comforting smile as he presses his thumbs into the arches of your socked feet.
you shake your head 'no' at him and he nods his head. "are you hungry?"
you shrug, barely, but he sees it.
"okay," he says softly leaning up, resting his elbows on his thighs. "if i make us something, will you try to eat?"
you stare at him. he waits a second before adding, "you don't have to eat if you don't want to, but i'm going to make you a plate anyway, okay?"
you blink at him, and nod slightly. he gives your foot one last squeeze and gets up to head to the kitchen.
you turn your eyes back to the tv that's been playing in the living room this entire time. you aren't watching it, you truly have no idea what's even on, your eyes not focusing enough to process or care what it is. you barely even register that there's sound coming from it.
you're not sure how long it's been, but hotch comes back with two plates in his hands and sets them down on the coffee table. he sits down on the floor and scoots your plate over towards you. there's not much food on it. a couple pieces of steamed broccoli, a scoop of mashed potatoes and a pathetic excuse of a piece of meat. you stare at it, willing your brain to just let you move and want to eat it.
"it's not much, but it was the quickest thing i could throw together in the air fryer," he tells you. "well, the broccoli was steamed in the microwave...i cheated a little." he shoots you a cheesy grin that you barely catch out of the corner of your eye. "and the mashed potatoes are instant. don't tell anyone though."
it's funny how moments like this make you fall more in love with him. he knows you're hurting, would stop the world and do whatever it took to get the pain to stop, but he acts normal around you, keeping light conversation with you and not trying to get you to "cheer up" like most people would try to do.
you're still staring at the plate, an internal screaming match taking place inside the entirety of your brain when you realize he's still talking. you have no idea what he just said, but he's still got that goofy grin on his face as he shoves a piece of broccoli in his mouth.
something inside of you loosens, the vice grip lets go of your soul for a moment and you huff a small laugh at him.
"are you laughing at me or the fact that jj accidentally broke reid's nose?"
okay, wait a second. what?
"what?" you ask, your voice a little hoarse but full of complete amusement.
he laughs, a full toothy laugh that always makes your heart swell. "yeah," he finishes chewing and swallowing his food and turns to look more at you. "reid was trying to show her some new magic trick he'd just learned and, i'm not entirely sure how it happened, but it startled jj enough to where she accidentally elbowed his face. right in the nose."
you blink incredulously at him before you shift yourself up on your elbow. "is he okay?"
hotch nods. "yeah, he's fine. after the initial shock of it, they all started laughing."
the conversation tapers off and your eyes go back to the plate thats slowly getting cold. hotch is nearly done with his. he pats the floor next to him, "join me?"
and so you do. you really have to make your limbs work and it's such an energy draining task that just makes you angry because why in the world do you have to keep fighting with yourself to literally just...live. but, you shake that thought out of your head and melt yourself off the couch and land on the floor next to him; it makes him laugh again and that seems to help dissipate even more of the darkness leaching to your spine.
"want me to feed you?" you know he's joking, he wiggles his eyebrows at you as he says it, making airplane noises with his own fork as he wiggles it around the air to your mouth.
you actually laugh at that and the smile he gives you is so beautiful you nearly, actually cry.
"i love you." is all you say. you rest your head against his shoulder and slide your plate over in front of you and take a bite of the mashed potatoes. the first bite always kick starts your brain, making you realize just how hungry you are so you quickly scoop up another forkful and nearly shovel it in your mouth.
"i love you too, honey." he tells you and you turn a little to kiss his sleeved shoulder.
"it's because of the steamed broccoli, isn't it? that always gets the girls all wild for me."
the rest of whatever evil lurking inside you breaks and you snort laugh at him, throwing your head back onto the couch cushion.
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nickfowlerrr · 9 months
Text
i never thought you’d happen to me - 3
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part one / part two
pairing: bucky barnes x curvy!reader
warnings: 18+ only. fluff, teeny tiny bit of angst maybe? allusion to, but no actual, smut. time travel via magic. dad!bucky and mom!reader. steve x nat. if i’m missing anything that should be tagged, please lmk!
words: 2.6k
notes: this idea came from a prompt post i saw not too long ago and coincidentally fell into some bingo spots for my @the-slumberparty bingo card. fair warning: this is so completely self indulgent and a little trope overload lol but i had such a good time working on it and it was fun to write so who really cares 😌 thank you in advance for reading and reblogging! as always, comments and reblogs are more than welcome and so appreciated. please let me know what you think!
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As you pull up to their house, the soft glow from the few lights still on inside light up the windows along the front face. Bucky parks as you unbuckle and meets you as you open the passenger door, Wolfie in your hand as you stand.
You make your way up their porch quickly before Bucky knocks softly on the front door. It opens not too much later as Steve greets you both, holding Linc with one arm as he carries the still pouting boy, his head resting on Steve’s shoulder and chest as his arms hold onto his Uncle as comfortably as he can.
The second he registers its you guys, his bright blue eyes go wide, turning to Steve with a look of surprise, his mouth parting open like he can’t believe his own eyes, before he turns back to you both and stretches his arms out to Bucky, hitting Steve a bit as he does, but not seeming to register it in his excitement. Steve chuckles as he hands him over to Bucky, who takes him in his arms readily.
“Hi, Daddy,” Linc greets as he cuddles into Bucky’s chest, looking like he’s about to pass out any second now.
“Hey, buddy,” he smiles, “We brought you Wolfie.”
“Don’t need Wolfie,” he shakes his head, burying his face in Bucky’s shirt. “You, Daddy.”
You see the moment it clicks in Bucky’s mind that all Linc really wanted was him, and you can’t help but smile at the gleam in his eyes as he hugs his son tighter. 
“Here, come in,” Steve tells you both, urging you inside. “I think Ellie’s sleeping, already,” he continues as he leads you to the kid’s room. Peeking inside, you can see her sleeping soundly, the spot near her, reserved for Licoln, obviously empty. You stare for a moment longer before Bucky steps beside you. 
“We’re gonna try and go to sleep now, okay?” he tells Linc, who nods softly. 
As Bucky enters the room, you find yourself alone with Steve in the hallway, who is staring at you quizzically. 
“What?” you ask him.
“Nothin’,” he brushes off. “It’s just..” he stops himself, thinking through what he wants to say before he continues carefully. “Are you guys alright?”
You look at him like a deer in headlights. 
“Yeah,” you breathe with a bit too fervent of a nod. “Yeah, why wouldn’t we be?”
“I don’t know,” he shrugs, “Just want to make sure. You guys have been acting odd all day. And look, if it’s a secret or something, that’s fine.. But, you know you can tell us anything. I just want to make sure everything’s alright,” he says sincerely, looking at you in the way only he can, a trust and understanding in his eyes that makes you want to come clean just like that. On instinct, you find yourself opening your mouth to confess your situation, but catch yourself before letting the absurdity slip.
“It is a secret,” you say, smiling through a grimace. “But, I promise, we’re good.”
He looks at you thoughtfully once more before conceding with a nod. “Okay,” he says before offering you a small smile. 
The door creaks open a bit wider once again and you expect to find Bucky alone, coming out from getting Linc down.
So when he opens the door even wider and walks out with a twin in each arm, a sorry smile on his lips as he meets your eye, you can’t help but scoff in amusement. 
Ellie is snoozing against him as Lincoln holds onto Wolfie like his life depends on it. His eyes are tired but he fights it still. 
“I tried,” Bucky defends himself, “but Ellie woke up and they sweet talked me.”
“Can’t blame you,” Steve laughs, “Poppy suckered me into extra s’mores earlier with one puppy dog look alone, I can’t imagine what double toddler pouts would get outta me.”
Bucky laughs in turn, a look of pure happiness in his eyes as he watches his best friend in such simple joy talking about his kids. Steve is happy. Nat is happy. And you, he thinks, you’re happy too. He doesn’t know how or when you all luck out on this, but just knowing that this is the future that awaits him, he’s excited to go back to the present so he can live out every moment of this with you.
Ellie’s eyes flutter at the sound of your laugh at Steve’s story and she gingerly picks her head up, her eyes looking around. When she spots you, she lets her eyes close again as a smile graces her precious face, one arm blindly reaching out in your direction.
You see her and gently take her from Bucky’s hold, holding her tightly against you as she nuzzles into you. Her hand is petting you gently, like she’s ensuring you’re there and you feel her. You smile at the affectionate gesture until her small voice makes its way to your ears.
“Momma,” she sighs sleepily as she cuddles into your neck before her movements eventually stop and she’s sleeping once again. 
And that was it. Her sweet, soft voice did it. You had to turn away from her as best you could as you tried not to choke on your cry - not wanting to wake her up and alarm her as your eyes welled and a tear slipped, your hand running up and down her back soothingly.
You could see the concern written all over Steve’s face as he looked at you, “You alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just been feeling really emotional lately,” you try to write off the sudden display of emotions taking over you.
“Oh. Oh,” he realizes. He nods, almost dumbly, “right, right.”
You know what he’s putting together in his mind, but you don’t have the energy to correct him. That can be a problem for future you to tamper down. You sniffle, trying to collect yourself as you hold Ellie securely in your arms. You look to Bucky with an unspoken question.
“I think we’re gonna take ‘em home, this little guy doesn’t wanna sleep tonight,” Bucky says, patting Linc’s back gently. “But thank you guys for watching them today.”
“Yeah, of course. And hey, we can pick them up on our way out tomorrow if you guys still wanted the day. Poppy and Al have been looking forward to it all week.”
“That’d be great,” you nod with a smile. “Thank you, Steve.”
“Anytime.”
You all walk to the front door and part with hugs before you and Bucky get the sleepy toddlers buckled in their seats. This time is much easier than it was this morning now that they’re thoroughly exhausted and not wiggling around like worms.
You shut the doors gently before getting in yourselves, Bucky driving you all back to the house in a peaceful quiet.
It’s easy getting them out of the car, each of you holding one as you enter back inside. 
You and Bucky carry them to their room, thinking they’re finally settled, but as you try to put them down in their beds, neither of them will let go of you guys. Ellie is clearly still sleepy as she huffs annoyedly at you for trying to leave her when she’s so comfy, and Linc is awake again as he holds onto Bucky and Wolfie.
“Big bed, daddy,” he mumbles, looking at him with those pleading eyes. 
Bucky looks at you, finding you holding Ellie close once again, not having put her down after her huffing. You shrug and watch as he nods, turning back to grab Lincoln.
“Alright,” he sighs, “come on, buddy. But we have to go to bed now, got it?”
“Mhm,” he nods happily, hugging Bucky’s neck.
You smile at the scene before making your way to the bedroom, thankful that all of you are already in pajamas as you sit on the bed with Ellie.
“I’m gonna lay down with you in a second, baby,” you reassure her quietly before setting her down, her head on a pillow near the center of the bed.
You take off your shoes as Bucky puts Lincoln down next to Ellie and does the same. You look at the twins, Lincoln finally letting his eyes close as his breaths slow and steady and sleep takes him at last. Bucky walks over to you and turns your face to him gently. You touch his wrist gingerly as you look in his eyes, stepping in closer. Being so close has never felt so right.
“What time did you fall asleep last night?” you ask him softly.
“Around midnight.”
“Me too,” you nod.
“Guess we still have a few hours to enjoy this,” he says, dropping his hand from your cheek in favor of pulling you closer by your waist, looking over with a bittersweet smile to the twins on the bed. 
“Yeah,” you agree, “...and then what?” 
“And then… we go back. Start living this all out in real time. Enjoy every second,” he says, leaning down to kiss you gently.
“Not the worst way to start forever,” you muse.
“Forever, huh?” he asks with a smirk.
“As long as we both shall live,” you nod with a smile of your own.
He titters before kissing you again, your lips moving softly against his. “Who woulda thought.”
“Mmm… everyone but us, apparently,” you laugh breathily before brushing his lips with yours once more. You move to pull away but Bucky keeps you where you are, kissing you a little more firmly as his hands lightly squeeze your chubby waist. Finally, you part for air, his forehead falling to yours as you take a second to catch your breath, licking your lips a touch.
A mumble followed by a huff sounds from the bed, catching both your attentions. You turn and see Ellie moving around before she speaks, more clearly this time.
“Mommy,” she eeks out, voice groggy with sleep as she rolls over.
“I guess this is goodnight,” you smile softly.
“Goodnight,” he says, giving you a soft smile of his own, tightening his hold on you for a second as he admires you still before him. “I’ll find you in the morning,” he promises.
You nod, the thought sending your tummy fluttering. “Okay.”
You slowly part and walk around to your sides of the bed, getting in carefully so as not to wake the twins. As you settle in, Ellie senses you near and crawls to you, hugging you as she settles into your warmth. You look over and see Linc already rolled into Bucky in turn. Your eyes meet Bucky’s then as you share a smile. You scooch closer to them, and he meets you near the middle - the four of you comfortable as can be under the comforter. 
“Call me crazy,” he whispers, “but I’m looking forward to this already.”
You huff out a laugh at that before shaking your head lightly, “‘S’not that crazy,” you admit, sounding almost shy to yourself at the confession before glancing over at him again.
He looks so happy, his brilliant eyes shining even through the darkened room. “Goodnight, doll,” he offers again.
“Goodnight, Buck,” you whisper back.
With the twins cuddled up between you both, it isn’t long before all of you are sleeping soundly.
—-
It’s quiet when you wake up. 
And cold. 
You hate that. 
You slowly blink your eyes open, finding yourself in your room back at the tower once again. You check the clock. 3:02am. 
Your mind is racing and a weird feeling is growing in your stomach. You quickly recognize it as anxiety as you try to calm yourself down. The one thought that is at the forefront of your mind, over everything, is this: Was it real?
You sit up and take a second to orient yourself in the dark before getting up. You don’t bother with the lights, you go straight for the door to your room.
You pull it open as quietly as you can manage before walking into the hallway. It’s dark out here, too, but not pitch black. The glow from the soft lights down the hall offer you some sight before you follow them. No one is in the living room when you get there, though, the lights had just been left on apparently. You sigh, still struggling to comprehend if you’d just woken up from a very real seeming dream or if you really had just been in the future for 24 hours. You turn to start back down the hallway again. As you get to the entryway, you see a figure coming down, stopping you in your tracks as you try to see who it is. You step closer after a moment, too, curiosity eating at you - yelling at you to find out who it is. 
Another step and then the figure becomes more clear. When you get to the point where you can both see each other, you both still and idle a moment - both of you seeming to be equally unsure. 
Bucky takes a step to you, testing the waters. And you copy his movement. You stare at one another a second, your breathing getting heavier. 
Suddenly, you lose your patience. You can’t take it any longer, you muster your courage and with a deep, albeit shaky breath, you walk to him again. He moves just as swiftly as you now, more confident in his path before meeting you in the middle of the hallway.
No words pass your lips, the moment you’re close enough to touch, Bucky has you flush against him as he crashes his lips into yours. You’re pulling him to you before he just lifts you off your feet, forcing you to hold onto him - not that you really minded all that much. Your arms are wound around his neck, your fingers in his hair as your thick thighs are around him, his hands holding you with no effort at all. The kiss is intent and fervent and long overdue here. He doesn’t let up and neither do you - every emotion you’d been holding back finally spilling as you lose yourself in him. 
You have to break the kiss eventually, breathing heavier than you had been as you try to collect yourself as you press your forehead to his. Bucky holds you tightly, refusing to let you go as his eyes close - a shudder you almost didn’t notice passing over him.
“I love you,” he confesses quietly, almost pained. “‘M sorry if that’s too soon, but I need you to know. I do.”
“Bucky,” you utter, touching his cheek gently, urging him to look at you. You shake your head lightly, “don’t be sorry.” 
You kiss him again, gentler now. 
“I love you,” you breathe softly against his lips.
He smiles into your kiss, a sense of relief coming over you both as he hugs you tightly before he sets you down on your feet.
You look at him with a smile of your own, taking his hand in yours before you slowly start down the hall again.
“My room or yours?” you ask without pretense, leading the way. 
“My bed’s bigger,” he says, sweeping you off your feet and carrying you bridal style down the hall. “Hope you like it, because I don’t plan on letting you leave it for the next 24 hours. At least.
“We’ve got a lot of time to make up for. And a lot of future to catch up to,” he smiles as he carries you across the threshold before setting you gently down on his bed.
“Hm,” you simper, easily grabbing his hand and pulling him down on top of you, the sight of him above you sending that growing ever familiar thrill of anticipation through you, “we should really get started then.”
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concreteburialplot · 28 days
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Cool About It // 01
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01 - Breaking & Entering
pairing: noah sebastian x fem!oc
masterlist: here | crossposted: ao3 | word count: 6.3k
summary; Noah runs into an old friend while visiting his hometown for the holidays. Noah convinces Amelia to meet him on the playground they grew up on to catch up. Reminiscing leads them to a midnight adventure that reminds them all too much of the past.
warnings; alcohol consumption, breaking & entering? stealing? kinda?, hallmark-y, nostalgic, talks of family trauma, cops (acab!), vaguely sad & distraught Noah, uses 'Sebastian' as his last name, 18+ MDNI
disclaimer; welcome to my new short series! reminder that this is hallmark-y bc i began writing it in December lol i decided to challenge myself w this fic in multiple ways, one of the biggest ones was writing it in 3rd person vs my comfy world of 1st or 2nd person. I’ve never written in 3rd person so, if it’s not my best, i apologize, i’m sure it will improve lol
a/n: this is au and follows no actual timelines/events, and uses oc's for family members.
don't like it don't read it. don’t be mean for no reason & let others enjoy things thnx :)
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It had been quite a busy morning, and Amelia was slowly making her way through the longest line she’d had in a while. She finished heating up a cinnamon roll and snapped a lid on what felt like the 75th peppermint mocha she’d made that day.
“Thanks.” Mumbled the distracted patron and stepped off to the side to grab extra napkins.
“Next.” She said while shuffling dollar bills into the clangy register, then looked up motioning to the last customer. Her hazel eyes landed on a man covered in tattoos pre-occupied on his phone. “Next!” Her call was louder than before and this time edged with impatient annoyance.
A familiar pair of dark brown eyes snapped up at her, his gaze more startled than angry.
Amelia’s brows furrowed together and as if on cue, the register dinged closed in time with her realization.
She’d recognize those eyes anywhere.
“Noah?”
The soft velvet of her voice yanked each edge of Noah’s mouth into a wide toothy smile. “Scout?” He asked in the same caught-off-guard tone. His voice was much deeper than she remembered, and he seemed taller, if that was even possible.
She chuckled at the fact that he used his old nickname for her and felt a tinge of warmth bloom on her cheeks. The ends of her pink lips curled up into an adorably genuine smile. “What are you doing here?” She pressed her palms flat against the cold counter leaning forward and letting soft chocolate curls spill over her shoulder.
“Oh, uh, I’m here with Nicholas.” He thumbed over his shoulder towards the town. “He’s here visiting his family, I just tagged along.”
Tagged along.
She should’ve known, of course Noah would be down here with Nick’s family for Christmas. Where else would he be?
“Oh,” She smiled tenderly at his words and nodded. “Of course.”
Every now and then she’d run into Nicholas whenever he came back to town or ran into his parents while out and about, but it was never anything of significance. Whenever it was Nicholas, she wanted more than anything to inquire about Noah or the band but always kept the interactions short, sweet and reserved. The last thing she wanted was to come off as wanting to “catch up” after they gained a larger audience for clout.
He grinned back at her and there was a quiet moment shared between them, as if they both didn’t know what to say. The feeling in the air swung from having nothing to say to having so many words that it was overwhelming to speak.
The gentle moment was broken by the bell dinging above the door as a new customer walked in.
Her first impulse was to make his usual but stopped herself. “Oh um, whatcha want?” She asked, realizing that his tastes had probably changed since he was 16.
“Just a vanilla cold brew is fine, thank you.” He said with a tight-lipped smile, feeling awkward that she was serving him.
She went ahead and filled his cup with the dark amber liquid. “Do you want a snickerdoodle cookie? They’re freshly baked.”
He nods enthusiastically, “Yes please, they’re my favorite.”
She remembered.
Of course, she did.
How could one forget staying up til 2 am at Nick’s house baking cookies and having Top Chef-level trials trying to achieve the perfect spice mixture for what Noah called, “The Most Snick-of-Doodles that could ever Doodle.”
“You got it.” She smiled placing some pastries into a brown paper bag before handing it to him. “I threw in a cinnamon roll for Nicholas, I made sure to give him the one with the most icing.”
“Oh, he’ll love that.” He chuckled gently taking the bag along with his drink. “We should um, catch up soon?”
“Sure.” She pressed her lips together to keep her grin from growing too wide.
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Cold fallen leaves crunched beneath Amelia’s feet as she navigated through a park that she hadn’t stepped foot on in a good ten years. A cool chill made her tug her thick knit cardigan tight around her thin frame.
“Noah?” She delicately whisper-yelled into the darkness, the meet-up destination barely lit by the full ivory moon. She should’ve known that Noah wouldn’t be content with catching up at a restaurant or at her house or anywhere normal.
“Scout!” He replied from the swings a bit to her left. A chuckle left his lips, and he quickly clicked the flashlight on his phone, waving it in the air like a search light.
A deep shade of embarrassment coated her pale cheeks, “There’s no streetlights over here!” She walked over and lightly smacked his arm. “It’s dangerous you know.” The weight of her body creaked the metal frame when she fell into the blue swing seat.
“Or you’re just getting old and need glasses.” He teased with a slight slur riding the end of his words.
“Ha-ha, very funny.” She responded with a playful glare.
She looked over at him thinking how funny it was seeing him so large and full grown in such a tiny, low swing. It looked extremely disproportionate and goofy, like a Great Dane in a shopping cart.
He handed her a bottle of cheap red wine, half drank already.
“Oh, got started without me huh?” She sassed before stealing the bottle from his fingers. “Couldn’t have done beer?” She tips the glass bottle until bitter, dry alcohol infiltrates every tastebud, reminding her why she’d switched to martinis or seltzers in her later years.
He waved her off with a tsk, “Too much hassle. Wine was easier. And you took fuckin’ forever!”
“Right.” She rolled her eyes playfully, it wasn’t like she was all that upset over the wine over beer, just that he drank so much of it already. She pressed the mouth of the bottle to her lips once more taking another hefty swig and handed it back to him. “Where’s Nick?”
“Ah,” He swiped the bottle back and took a long gulp. “You know, family stuff.” He wiped the back of hand across his mouth. “I can only handle – so much of it.” His hands motion off his words. “They mean well I just… can’t do too much of it at once.”
Growing up with parents that were as dismissive and absent, then gone all at once like his, knowing how to “family” was odd and foreign to him. As Noah got older, he began to realize that basic family etiquette was a trait he fundamentally lacked, as if he played hooky on some Family 101 course in his formative years. It wasn’t something he inherently prioritized and, at least when he was younger, it would irritate him when friends or colleagues put family above things that he deemed more important, like band related obligations. He never had to deal with family of his own, put it on his schedule or allot energy for it. He simply didn’t understand it.
Sure, he came off as rude at times, leaving friend’s family events early or mentally checking out mid-day. It wasn’t his fault that it was exhausting and overstimulating for him. To him it seemed natural, as if everyone felt that way, something akin to the universal experience of trying to escape school or work. It never crossed his mind that people might actually enjoy their families, nor could he comprehend the necessity for it.
It depended on who, what and when but for the most part it was exhausting to him. Some groups were better than others, like Nick’s family. Over the years they’d housed him for weeks at a time, months even sometimes. As far as Noah was concerned, the Ruffilo’s were his family. He always came and went as he pleased, always an open-door policy to the Ruffilo refuge. But that didn’t exclude Nick’s family from his unintended ignorance and tendency to run. He just could only take so much at once. Lucky for him, they never seemed to mind his behavior much. They never batted an eye; they understood him for who he was and why. Their house was one of the only places he felt comfortable, one of the only places he ever called home.
“I know.” She nodded, wrapping her hands around the thick swing chains. “I remember.”
“Right.” He replies solemnly, taking another sip before swapping it back.
Vivid memories filled Amelia’s brain of 14-year-old Noah tapping on her window like a freshly escaped felon looking for asylum. The heavy, panicked breathing and glassy eyes never matched the mischievous grin plastered across his face. Holidays were the worst; she recalls keeping her window unlocked during the winter months, so he’d always have an alternative escape. The Ruffilo’s were a festive bunch that took any excuse to celebrate. Naturally, Nicholas also only possessed so much adolescent tolerance to endure so many familial festivities so, he too would sneak away with Noah at times but, for the most part it was just him and Amelia celebrating holidays together on her bedroom floor.  
The air was still between them while she took a couple sips of sanguine liquid trying to catch up to him.
“So, you’re a big ol’ rockstar now huh?” The girl smiled, nudging him with her elbow trying to lighten the mood. Even though the words are positive and light, they tasted so sad on her tongue.
He laughed, something she hadn’t heard in what felt like a lifetime. She nearly forgot what it sounded like, but it hadn’t changed really, just a little deeper now. His now tattooed hands grasped both metal swing chains and leaned back a little, using the tension to suspend his body while he observed the stars above them. “Not big. Just opening for some real bands now. Finally able to headline our own little tour soon. Fuckin’ took long enough.” He dismissed the compliment immediately, snuffing it into the ground like a shriveled-up cigarette butt.
She couldn’t help but roll her eyes at his response. He might’ve not seen it as notable accomplishments, but she knew better than to place the validity of success in the hands of someone riddled with imposter syndrome.
“Well, for what it’s worth, I think it’s pretty fucking cool.” She leaned against the chain closest to the long-haired boy.
His lips pulled to a smile while his eyes stayed focused on the sky. “Thanks.”
She followed his gaze and chuckled, “Sky’s pretty interesting huh?” She teased.
“It is when you barely get to see stars. I never really get to see them in LA. Sometimes I forget they’re even up there.” He replied sadly before sitting back up.
Amelia took another sip of the almost empty bottle, starting to feel the warmth of alcohol spread through her body. Something about the stars and Noah made a memory cross her mind that made her burst out into a cackle. “Do you remember when you put SO much work into your astronomy project for the science fair and fucking Nicholas won with his fucking-”
“Moldy bread!” They said loudly in unison before erupting into booming laughter.
“God I was so pissed.” Noah shook his head, “And then I had to eat his fucking moldy bread.”
“Oh yeah because you lost the bet! I forgot all about that!” Laughter filled her ribcage in a way it hadn’t in years, and it felt really fucking good.
“I was so fucking sure I’d win! I should’ve known, Nick has always been the golden boy. Teacher’s-pet swindling ass.” He kicked the sand just as he would’ve at 8 years old. It’s funny how people’s mannerisms don’t really change all that much as they age. Being there with him on their old playground felt like being in a time machine. “Worst food poisoning I ever had.”
“Didn’t you borrow the telescope you used from Nick too?” She questioned, wondering if she just made that part up in her head.
“Yeah, yeah I think I did actually.” His brows furrowed as he dug through his memories. “You know what? It’s probably still in their garage!”
“Really? Maybe you can find it tomorrow.” She poured the rest of the wine into her mouth, savoring the cheap bitterness of it pooling on her tongue.
“But the stars are so pretty tonight!” He whined in classic Noah fashion.
“Yeah so? What are you gonna do? Break into their garage?” She chuckled jokingly.
He straightened up and looked over at her with wide eyes like a lightbulb just lit above his head - a look she remembered all too well.
“No.” She warned, just like she would’ve back then at whatever scheme Noah concocted in his devious little brain.
He gave her a familiar mischievous toothy grin before pushing harshly off the swing.
“No, no, no.” She sighed as he already left his seat swinging and made his way towards the street.
“Noah!” She called after him. When he showed no sign of stopping, she let out a long sigh, questioning how she ended up having to stop a 6’4 man from breaking into houses in the middle of the night. She pushed off the swing, leaving it clanging and swaying behind her.
“Noah I’m not br-“ Her yell dulled down to a hush when she caught up to him. “I’m not breaking into the Ruffilo house at midnight!” Her words were stern but to Noah they just sounded like a child’s warning against curse words.
“We’re not breaking in ‘melia.” He didn’t match her whisper, his voice was loud and proud for anyone in the night to hear. “I remember the garage code.” He announced with drunken pride.
She scoffed, “And what if someone hears the garage, Noah? Then what?”
He shrugged, “Nick is staying there, we’ll just say we were trying to see him or something. You know I have free reign there anyway.”
“This is a really shitty plan, Noah.” She crossed her arms over her chest with a displeased frown.
“It’s a great plan.” He stated confidently, walking in long strides that she could barely keep up with. “You know all my plans are great.”
“Hmm.” She hummed skeptically. “Statistically, I don’t think that’s true.”
Walking down the street with Noah to Nick’s family home in the dead of the night felt so… familiar, as if she was walking in the same exact footsteps as 15-year-old Amelia had, like her memories were tangible in her hands again. She tightened her fists slightly to remind herself that the past was not solid in her hands again. She wasn’t 15 again on some spontaneous, teenage adventure – but the alcohol-fueled adrenaline prickling at her fingertips begged to differ.
Even past midnight, the small neighborhood’s Christmas lights shined bright. Normally, she’d find them obnoxious, but tonight they seemed much sweeter, only adding to the nostalgia.
“Oh no? All of my plans worked out one way or another.” He defended as if it was factual with a straightened back and pointed finger. “All but one.”
Her brows knitted tightly together at his words, because in her memory, there was a good chunk of her life spent stuck in detention because of his schemes.
“And which one would that be?” She sassed back, watching as his speed picked up even more after her question.
“Not important.” He waved the brunette off, “C’mon, we’re here.”
Unexpectedly, his hand slips around her wrist, and it wraps tingly electricity up her arm then across her entire body. All at once the butterflies that used to be so perpetually embedded in her stomach returned in a rampant flurry. Her gaze slowly snapped up to meet his face. His smile hadn’t changed in the near 10 years apart and neither did the bright glint in his espresso eyes. Time seemed to slow around them for that split second where the electricity sizzled beneath both their fingertips and their eyes found each other’s just as easily as they used to. In that brief moment she could’ve sworn she was looking into the eyes of rail thin, tattooless teenage Noah.
“I know they got a Ring doorbell, so we gotta hide between the cars.” He whispered and ducked them both down as he weaved her through the vehicles in the driveway.
“I can’t fucking believe you talked me into this Noah!” She whisper-yelled at him, wanting nothing more than to properly reprimand him.
“Sh!”
They finally found themselves in front of the garage keypad conveniently out of view of the doorbell camera. Noah blinked blankly at plastic number pad without moving. His inked fingers tapped on his own crossed arm while his tongue stayed lodged between his lips in thought.
“Well? Go ahead! Get it over with.” She insisted, motioning urgently to the garage wanting it to be over as fast as possible. She tucked her hands across her body and into her sides giving her some semblance of comfort. The last thing she wanted was for their childish midnight antics to wake up the entire house.
“Hey! Give me time.” He rushed back, lifting a finger in her direction to shush her.
“Time? I thought you said you remembered it!”
“I do! …I think… if they haven’t changed it.” His tone much less confident than before.
“Noah!”
“Hush!” He pressed a finger to his lips at her and took a hesitant step towards the keypad. With a couple semi-sure clicks, the garage door slid open slowly. Amelia exhaled in relief at how the metal clangs of the garage were much quieter than she remembered. Still though, they creaked too loud for her liking, feeling embarrassment and anxiety flood her body.
“Yes!” Noah squeezed his fists up in victory. “See, told you I remembered.”
“Lucky guess.” She rolled her eyes with a smile.
Her eyes widened as the garage door unveiled a gorgeous white car. It was by no means a luxury car, not a Lexus or anything of the sort, but a high enough model to make you look twice. “Damn Mama Ruffilo, ridin’ in style now.”
Noah grinned as he scoots around the car. His smile was reserved, like she had discovered some award he was keeping hidden out of modesty. “Yeah, that’s the one we got her for Mother’s Day.”
“We?” She questioned, her head cocking to the side a bit.
“Yeah, Nick and me. We each paid half.”
“Oh wow, that’s really nice of you.” She replied softly. It didn’t take a genius to calculate just how much it would cost two broke DIY touring bandmates to pay for a new car, even in halves. The vehicle was shiny and spotless, evidently well taken care of – the type of care you’d put into a possession you never thought you’d own, the type of care that came from deep gratitude.
“It’s the least I could do for ya know… everything she’s done for me.”
Amelia nodded knowing exactly what he meant. It was no secret that he was more than a family friend to them, but it was nice to see that he recognized it too. While Noah might not have attended every family event or stayed for long, he showed his love and appreciation in his own small ways. Gifts were one of his favorite ways of doing so. Yeah, Noah might’ve only stayed at a Thanksgiving for an hour or two for food, but he was there long enough to make mental notes for next year, to bring extra cranberry sauce because Nick’s abuela loves it or extra croutons since Nick’s mom tends to snack on them while she cooks. He paid attention and he loved deeply, even if it didn’t seem that way on the surface.
He rustled around some miscellaneous garage junk in the corner, making more noise than Amelia felt comfortable with. She stood up on her tip toes to watch carefully him over the pristine car with her heart beating in her chest begging to rush him again.
“Ah! I knew it’d be here!” He said a little too loud out of excitement and promptly covered his mouth. His wide brown eyes met hers in a silent ‘oops, shit, sorry!’ plea.
In desperate need to escape the anxiety inducing mission, Amelia ran to the end of the driveway the second she saw the telescope in Noah’s hand. It took him longer than it should’ve just to snatch the item, but she didn’t question it or investigate much when he sped right past her after the garage began squeaking closed.
They made it out in record time, holding in their laughter until they reached the end of the street. It only took one look at each other to send them into a cackling fit. Amelia’s delicate hands found his thin arm and used him for stability, while the laughter shook her entire frame.
When they make it back to the park, he set down the telescope and unravels something she somehow didn’t notice he was carrying before.
“Did you steal that from their garage?!”
He grinned and proudly pulled another bottle of wine, white this time, from the blanket he also borrowed. “Yeah? And I’ll just replace them when I bring the telescope back tomorrow.” He carefully sat the wine down at her feet and spread out the buffalo-print blanket over the grass.
“You are so bad!” She chuckled, smacking him playfully with the excess of her long cardigan sleeve.
“Isn’t that what girls want? A bad boy?” He smirked jokingly, getting down on his knees to angle the telescope just right so that they didn’t need to stand up to use it.
She pressed her lips together as she watched him. Sure, that’s what some girls want, but not her. Even when he was landing them in detention every other day and keeping them out way past curfew – even when everyone else considered him a “bad boy” – she knew he wasn’t, not really.
Even now, whenever he got on stage, covered in ink, growling like a demon – she knew he wasn’t, and has never been, “bad”. Not the way she knew him. Amelia had a talent for seeing through people and she always saw right through Noah, from the first time she ever saw him in the back of her 3rd grade class. And all through adolescence, she saw him clearly through all his stormy confliction and thick brick walls.
Noah never saw it of course; how could he believe that someone as sugary sweet as Amelia could possibly ever see him as anything more than comical the social mask he wore with friends. In fact, he would even go as far to believe his mask was thickest and most opaque around her. Whether or not that was factual, didn’t lessen her ability to see him, really see him.
Being told you’re so wrong for so long, makes you believe that no one could ever see you as right. No matter how many friends Noah had at his parties, or fans in his crowds or girls in his bed, he never felt as though anyone saw him as enough. He got so exhausted from constantly trying to outdo himself that sometimes he forgot what exactly he was trying to accomplish.
Amelia never once believed the “bad influence, bad boy” propaganda their parents or teachers ever accused him of. To her, he was just Noah; the weird emo kid in the back of her classes, the neighbor down the street, the other older “brother” of the youngest girl scout in her troop. Amelia knew Noah at his core.
“Ah, bad boys are overrated.” She waved off his words casually.
He turned and gave her an unconvinced look, “Yeah, sure.” he glared playfully before sitting back on his legs. “Well, it’s ready if you wanna look.”
Amelia crawled across the blanket to meet him and peered through the telescope. Billions of tiny stars flooded the glass lens with twinkles and glimmers you’d never be able to see normally. Fluffy white clouds interrupted the view every so often, but it didn’t take away from the breathtaking scene.
“Whoa.” She mouthed quietly, just taking in the sight. “It’s so beautiful.”
“Sure is.” Noah agreed quietly, bringing his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them while he watched her.
They took some turns looking out of the telescope and passing the wine bottle back and forth before finally resting side by side on the picnic fabric. The air around them both was full of dwindling laughter over Noah telling silly stories about him and Nicholas and their roommates in LA. At surface level, he seemed to be doing well, despite claiming to hate LA, he appeared to be thriving there. Perhaps it was just the roommates that he enjoyed living with. Noah was never one to enjoy solitude, at least not for long periods of time. When he lived in their hometown, he was rarely wherever he was staying at the time. Getting comfortable anywhere was never his goal or motive. For the most part, it seemed like he enjoyed the constant change, the running. However, the way he talked about their home in California, all the stories he shared that brought the grandest smile to his face or the loudest boom from his chest all took place at their home. Amelia wondered what it must feel like for him to be back in their dreary little town, and if he rattled off all those stories was because he was homesick.
As the space between them flooded with a silence that was equally comfortable and uncomfortable, a question bubbled up that had been eating at Amelia from the moment she laid eyes on the tired darkness hanging beneath Noah’s eyes. His grin for most of the night was wide and toothy but she knew him better than that.
“So,” She turned her head towards him. “How are you, really?”
His eyes stayed transfixed on the stars above and he let a dense quiet settle over them before speaking.
“It must get so exhausting.” He stated, ignoring her question all together.
Her brows furrowed at his words, “What does?”
“Being so bright all the time.” He stated flatly, with a low dejected tone lacing his words.
“The stars?” She questioned with her brows still knitted.
“Sure. The Moon, the cosmos, all of it.” He brought his hands to interlace over his tummy. “Sure, the moon gets a break during the day and gets to disappear for a bit every month. And the stars get to die eventually.
“Right…?”
“But a star’s entire existence is to be bright - they only exist to be bright and then die. The moon works every night to serve as a giant nightlight and to shift some waves around. It must be so exhausting, all of it – being so bright all the time just to burn out into nothing.”
Noah had always been good at avoiding both his feelings and Amelia’s prying questions. It seemed age and time hadn’t changed that specific skill set. Maybe it’s true what they say, people never really change. It worried her that he might’ve not changed at all in that way.
“I mean,” She shifted her head to face the stars again trying to find the answers in the same place he was getting the questions. “You’re not wrong… but, think about the good that they do. The moon does so much on its own for us, you know the tides, the earth’s axis and all that. But we wouldn’t even be here staring at the sky without it all. They’re pretty and,” She shrugs. “And maybe, sometimes, that’s enough.”
“Right.” He responded curtly, pausing a long while before speaking again. “If the moon had consciousness… do you think it would care that most people know it for being pretty and not for being good at its job?” He pondered, not once looking over at the girl, perhaps afraid that his façade would crumble, and he’d spill the truth if he met her eyes.
Amelia’s brows furrowed together once more as she processed his words, doing mental gymnastics to decipher the underlying meaning. Another skill set Noah possessed was being dramatically cryptic, especially when it came to his internal turmoil. Whenever he had some battle waging within him, he suddenly transformed into a makeshift philosopher.
Looking the way he does, it’s fair to assume that his band had garnered recent attention due to his looks – most men would revel in the fleeting female attention, but not Noah. At least not enough to keep him from being contemplative on the lawn of their old park.
Girls or not, Noah had always been particular about his craft. He was lucky he found Nicholas first since he really let Noah take reigns of the entire operation. Like a true perfectionist, Noah carefully curated every song, every show, every rehearsal – even back when they were just playing in Nick’s garage with shitty amps.
Amelia analyzed his words, thinking over her response carefully. “I think the moon would be grateful for the attention either way.” She commented gently. “As long as she’s doing the job she’s meant to do, her beauty getting noticed is just a bonus. As long as she’s doing what she’s destined to do, I think she’d be content doing whatever she needs to, regardless of the affection towards her.”
“Yeah, I guess she would.”
Looking up at the sky, Amelia noticed just how round the moon was that night and how perfectly it was centered in the sky. It looked like the inside of a circus tent, like the star littered sky was just a patterned fabric pierced right in the middle by a giant moon-shaped hole. It felt like it too – as if they were the only ones in some carnival tent far away from anything bad. Below such a vast cosmos, they were just tiny specs of dust in the universe, and she was grateful for the temporary solitude. After years of not even being around Noah, he still made her feel the same. He had a knack for dissolving any real-life problems when they were alone together. When she was with him, she was in a world of their own making. She wondered if she did the same for him, and for his sake, she really hoped she did.
But alas, the bubble they created together that night was not one that could exist forever, and the big top tent must come down after a grand show.
Amelia and Noah ran out of words, at least ones meant to be said that night. They laid side by side with her right hand and his left not even a centimeter apart.
Noah was unaware of whether it was fear, nerves or sadness that fueled the drumming beneath his brittle ribs, but that same force also tugged an invisible string to lift his pinky.
Amelia’s eyes rounded and every muscle in her body tensed up the millisecond she felt him move up and hover over her own pinky.
But before he got the chance to lock over her finger, there was a frightening rustling behind some playground equipment followed by a bright light aimed right at them, blinding the pair.
“Hey! You kids aren’t allowed in here!” Boomed a deep, authoritative voice.
Amelia propped herself up on an elbow and immediately used her arm as a shield to keep the blinding light from burning her retinas any further.
Noah closed his eyes and let out a deep breath through his nose. It was one of the many familiar sounds from the town Noah hoped to never hear again.
“Sebastian? What an unpleasant surprise.” The voice taunted with a vicious edge.
“Officer Hawke.” The eyeroll was thick in Noah’s voice. “So great to see you.”
The big burly man shifted the flashlight beam to Noah directly. “Not shocking that the first time I see you back in town you’re up to no good.” He moved the light back to Amelia’s face. “Also, not shocking that you’ve reunited with your old partner in crime. Corrupting Miss. Alastor again, are we?”
“Officer, we just fell asleep earlier, we didn’t mean to be here so late.” Amelia lied for Noah like she always had. Her and Nick had been the goodie-two-shoes that were always bailing or covering for the long-haired boy. Well, Amelia was truly good, Nick was just skilled at masking his deviant tendencies, using his sweet golden-boy allure to fool everyone. As much as she hated breaking the rules, she secretly loved when Noah enabled it. Her teenage years wouldn’t have been nearly as fun or memorable without the two mischievous boys. Even just lying in the park with Noah after dark made her feel the most alive she’d had in years. It was exhilarating, no matter how much she reprimanded the boy for his reckless rebellion.
“Mhm. Sounds about right, you covering for Mr. Sebastian here, for god knows why.” He speculated, unconvinced. “It’s like I stepped back in time. It seems you both haven’t changed much.”
While the cop had been berating the two, Noah had already began packing up the picnic trying to end the interaction as quickly as possible.
“Sorry officer, it won’t happen again.” She lied.
“Sure.” He retorted. “Get you and your boyfriend out of here. Don’t let me catch you in here again.”
With that he turned and headed back to his vehicle. It was surprising that he just left the pair– not surprising that he just sat and watched them from the comfort of his cop car across the street.
Amelia helped Noah pack everything up before they made their escape from the park. Shortly after they were down the street, the cop car finally drove off. She walked in the direction of her house, thinking that Noah would part ways to maybe head towards Nick’s house to return the stolen items or to Vince’s where he was staying for the time being, but he stayed walking alongside her. He was quiet, which for Noah was strange, especially with her.
“You know, you don’t have to walk me home? I know you’re staying in the opposite direction.” She said, stuffing her cold hands in her pockets.
“I want to. It’s dangerous for you to walk alone.” He replied flatly, kicking a pebble across the sidewalk concrete.
Her house wasn’t particularly far from the other two’s, nothing in the tiny town was necessarily far from each other. With a town as small as theirs, a night walk home wouldn’t usually be considered dangerous.
“Well, thanks.” She replied cautiously.
She let her mind wander to the interaction they had at the park with Officer Hawke. Noah’s mood had been fairly consistent all night up until then. She mentally scolded herself for not realizing that running into the overly familiar cop would affect his demeanor. Maybe she just assumed that after so many years into adulthood he’d be over it, but evidently, it was foolish and incredibly mindless for her to believe so.
The rest of the walk was silent, just filled with the sounds of nature in the winter. The crisp cool air zipping with the wind, crashing into every solid object available while owls coo-ed into the darkness.
Finally, they arrived at the chain-link gate of Amelia’s small home. She rested her arm atop the pointy wires of the fence. Any other night she’d probably invite him in, but it was so late and all of the night’s events had already been enough to overfill her tummy with static-y nerves.
“Well, I-“ They fumble over each other’s words. Warmth blooms across Amelia’s cheeks at the joint misstep.
“You go.” She urged.
“No, you go.” He pushed back with a sheepish grin.
A small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth and dropped her attention down to her feet. “I was just gonna say that this was… nice.” Her teeth dug into her bottom lip. “It was really nice to see you again Noah.” Her tone soft and genuine, as her eyes meet his again.
He was unprepared for how her eyes looked with the moonlight shining directly into them. He couldn’t remember the last time he looked into them so clearly. He forgot how different they were from each other, well, they weren’t really – but they were when one spent looking at them as intently as Noah had since he was 8 years old. Her eyes were both a hazel but one much more brown while the other had a pretty emerald hue.
“Yeah, it was really nice.” His words sounded true, but his voice was still strained by the sadness from the walk there. “I’m really happy I went into the shop this morning.”
Her lips worked overtime to keep from pulling into a giant grin and suddenly she was grateful for the darkness hiding the red staining her cheeks. “Yeah, me too.”
Noah sucked in a breath to speak but pauses, before returning again, “Um - Nick’s family is throwing their annual Christmas party this weekend, I’m sure he and the Ruffilo clan would love to see you.” He stated with his words moving slightly faster than normal almost like he was nervous to even ask, which is silly isn’t it? Being anxious to invite an old friend to a holiday party you both attended every year growing up? It shouldn’t be that nerve wreaking, right? He scratched the back of his neck. “If you want that is.”
Her eyes nearly light up enough to cut through the darkness. “Yeah,” She beamed a sweet smile up at him.  “I think I’d really like that.”
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taglist; @lma1986 @alastriaa @missduffsblog @xxkittenkissesxx @ladyveronikawrites @baddestomens @measuredingold @jilliemiw86
[comment to be added to taglist<3]
A/N; thank you so much for reading - again this is my first time writing in 3rd person so i hope it was decent! i hope you enjoyed even though it is definitely not christmas time lmao - lmk what you think! 💗
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spicyseonghwas · 10 months
Text
" illusory obsessions " - choi san
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pairing :: choi san x male reader genres/au's :: angst, smut, romance, subtle yandere viewer rating :: 18+ ; heavy emotions & sexual content content warnings :: cursing, very rough sex, unprotected sex, degradation, vaguely implied breeding, possessive/slightly yandere!san, sexual masochism, san is in his mid-30s & pretty much 10 years older than reader in the fic (hes 24 irl), the last sentence is a lil bit dark lol network tag :: @preciousillusions-net event :: preciousillusions net's grand opening event! word count :: 1,881 synopsis :: ah, choi san… your best friend since preschool… and the love of your life. but are you the same to him? or are you just a playdate to him?
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"ugh," san groaned, "i'm so bored, someone give me something to fuck."
"what the fuck do you mean, 'something to fuck'...?" you asked snippily, looking up from your phone to give your long-time best friend a suspicious, eyebrow-up look.
"what the hell do you think i mean when i say that? i want to fuck, m/n, you dumbass. i want a hole to stick my dick in."
you rolled your eyes, mumbling under your breath thinking san wouldn't hear.
"well maybe i'd give you myself if you'd fuckin' ask nicely."
but quite (un)fortunately for you, san did indeed hear every word you said.
and that was how you ended up in your current situation...
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"fuck, fuck, fuck!" you screamed, throwing your head back into the thick layer of blankets on san's bed and fisting the blankets as hard as you could in futile efforts to keep yourself from floating up onto cloud nine.
"yeah?" san purred, leaning in and biting your neck as hard as he could as he whispered filthy, possessive nothings into your ear. "you like that, bitch? you like being stuffed full of your best friend's cock, hm?"
he wrapped his hand around your throat and squeezed as hard as he could, letting loose a low, feral, wolf-like growl into your ear before letting his whole weight fall on top of you so he could fuck you harder.
"well your best friend likes it too, and now you don't get to fuck anyone else!" he said happily.
"fuck, s-san, right there," you whimpered weakly, wrapping your arms and legs around san's waist and shoulders and using all the strength you had left to squeeze as hard as you could in an effort to keep him as close as you could possibly get him to be.
"yeah, slut?" san hissed into your ear, pulling out to the tip before slamming back into you as hard as he could, making sure he was balls-deep inside you and nuzzling into your neck before he continued his beforehand movements of fucking you into oblivion.
"you love my cock so much, puppy, you're taking it so fucking well... you're gonna drive me insane..."
"fuuuck," you groaned, your face turning cherry-red and your eyes rolling back into your head as the tip of san's cock grazed your prostate again.
"f-shit, san, right there-"
san chuckled, deciding to change positions a bit. he pulled out, immediately replacing his cock with three fingers before you could register that you'd lost the feeling of his cock inside you. he wrapped his other hand around your cock and began to stroke it as fast as his wrist would let him whilst he continued to finger-fuck you into the clouds in the outer atmosphere with his fingers.
"such a filthy, slutty little bitch. such a cute little cocksleeve," san snapped, slapping your face- he didn't hit you hard, but he didn't exactly go soft on you either. he made sure to hit you just hard enough to get the cutest, most kitten-like little whimper out of you when you felt the light sting of his hand making contact with your cheek.
your face turned a little bit of a darker, bloodier shade of red when san slapped you, and despite your devout mental pleading with the universe that he didn't notice... he did.
"oh? you like it when i slap you around, you little whore?" san growled, giving you another, slightly softer slap on your cheek when you took a moment to respond- you were quite mentally unavailable at the moment with how hard and fast san's fingers were still fucking into you.
san smirked darkly when his second hit landed, taking his fingers out of your abused hole and reaching up and yanking you up by your hair. he moved you so that you were sitting on his lap, then wrapped his hand around your throat and yanked you closer.
"you said you wanted to try voyeurism, right?" he asked, looking right into your eyes with his dark, lustful, chocolate-colored ones.
you nodded vigorously, doing your dearest to pay full attention to san's words whilst imagining the things he was going to do to you next.
san let himself fall slightly out of character for a moment, a happy giggle escaping his throat as he smiled his shiny white trademark smile at you.
"yeah?" he asked, falling smoothly back into character as he leaned in to give you his next command.
"ride it, bitch." he hissed, "be a good, obedient little cocksleeve for your hyung, and maybe he'll let you suck it later while i talk with wooyoung."
you immediately obeyed san's wishes, taking hold of his cock and carefully sliding down back onto it. you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and buried your face into his neck before starting to move.
"mmmm... fuck," san growled, slapping your ass cheek lightly. "speed up, slut. i'm feeling impatient tonight."
you once again obeyed san's wishes, speeding up the movements of your hips so that you were bouncing up and down quick and hard on his cock, fucking yourself on it like there was no tomorrow.
"you're so cute," san cooed, pulling you closer by your throat and smashing his lips onto yours as hard as he could while his hips started moving to help you keep up with the pace he had set for you.
after all, he wasn't completely heartless.
not completely.
"oh, m/n," he sighed dramatically, moving both hands to your hips to help you fuck yourself a little harder. "you're such a beautiful boy... tearing my heart up like a rabid dog. i love you so much..." he confessed, smiling softly and pulling you as close as he could physically get you while he sped up his thrusts and chasing his high like a starving cat after a plump mouse.
his hand strayed up to hold your chin, and he closed the distance again, pressing his lips to yours and nibbling on your bottom lip with his canines, just hard enough to draw a little bit of blood.
"fuck, san, i-i'm getting close-" you whimpered, biting your already-broken bottom lip and licking a little bit of the blood off of the wound.
"cum for me, prince." san whispered, tangling his fingers into the hair on your scalp and yanking it in a tantalizingly slow manner before moving his hand to the hair on the base of your neck and yanking it as hard as he could without any warning to you.
and that one little feeling, that burning sting on the back of your neck, was the last little thing that drove you fully over the edge.
you screamed into san's neck as your orgasm hit you like a ship hitting the beach, biting into his collar to keep yourself from falling too far into the blissful void of feelings that was your orgasm.
"good boy." san said softly, helping you get yourself off of him. then he wrapped his arms around you and let his and your weight fall backward into the bed. he squeezed you as hard as he could. then he turned you carefully over onto your back and beginning to leave little butterfly kisses all over your neck, lips, body, chest, thighs, and forehead in an effort to give you soft feelings to focus on as you came down from your high.
"san?" you asked after a short while.
"yeah?" san replied softly.
"were you telling the truth when you said you love me?" you asked hesitantly, turning over onto your side and looking right into his eyes.
san smiled softly, reaching over and brushing some strands off of your sweaty forehead. his hand strayed to your cheek and his thumb began to softly caress your cheek, which was still slightly red from having been slapped twice earlier.
"of course i love you, darling," san said softly, "truthfully? i always have." he confessed.
"wait, really?" you asked confusedly, "what do you mean, you always have?"
san smiled softly again, his face turning a little red as his eyes strayed away from yours for a split second.
"i've been in love with you since you were eighteen, m/n."
"wait, really??" you said astonishedly, "san, baby, how come you never told me?? you've been in love with me since i was eighteen?? that's like- shit..."
you had to stop talking for a moment, and san just grinned in anticipation, waiting for you to figure it out.
"san..."
"yeah?"
"san, you're... you're thirty-five years old. you literally turned thirty-five, like, two days ago. and i'm almost twenty-five."
"mhmmm... and?" san said, trailing off in an effort to prompt you to figure the rest of it out.
"and.... and so that means you've been in love with me for... HOLY FUCKING-"
and san started laughing.
"SEVEN YEARS??" you shrieked.
"yeah, and??"
"AND- AND?? CHOI SAN, YOU'VE KEPT THIS INFORMATION FROM ME FOR SEVEN YEARS!!"
after san got his breath back enough to answer you coherently, he said,
"and i'd gladly fall in love with you for a thousand more and not tell you until the day you die if you not knowing that information keeps you from loving someone else the way it obviously has this time around."
you had no response for this.
"san..." you started softly, but trailed off; you couldn't find anything to say.
"san, why so long?"
"i just told you, it's so that you'd keep trailing along after me trying to find out whether i loved you back or not, and that would keep you from giving in to someone else's advances." san answered, taking your hand and squeezing it.
"m/n, the thought of you falling in love with another man haunts my dreams, it's the only thing i've had a nightmare about for almost eighteen years. i don't... i want you to love me. i don't want you to love someone else, because i'm afraid that if you do, i'll hurt them out of jealousy, and that'll drive you away."
your heart broke.
"san, i..."
your eyes started to burn, and you screwed them shut as they filled up with tears. you tried to keep them at bay, but san knew this would happen, and he wasn't going to let you continue this self-destructive habit you'd always had of acting tougher than you were. because the thought in his mind might sound sort of sick, and one could rightfully judge him if they thought it so...
but san wanted you to cry.
and no, it wasn't because of some sick fantasy of dacryphilia... no, it was for the sake of your heart, because, you see...
l/n m/n never cried.
and every time you kept yourself from crying, it broke san's already-shattered heart into another ten thousand tiny little pieces. he wanted you to cry. he wanted you to let your walls fall down for a while. he needed you to feel better, because you feeling a little more at peace with yourself would make san hate himself a little less for loving you as long as he had.
it would make him feel a little better about the things he wanted to do to you when you were comfortable with him doing them.
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