#nobody touch me i am in (s)pain

[keeps-ache]

augghhuuhhh i closed all my incognito tabssbssssssbsbssss

#just me hi #p a i n a n d s o r r o w #i have to sign back into Everything again ugH #banging my head on a pillow and still getting a headacheeee #ueghghueuhguehguhguehgugheuhg #usually i wouldn't complain but holy heavens this has been happening more and more often >:/ #uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy #i loathe having to sign into stuff iiighghhgh #guess i won't be touching insta again for a while l o l #might touch up my website while i'm at it then. maybe figure out how to add images :/ #it was like 15+ tabs dude RIP #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaHHH 15+ tabsssssssssbbbsbsbbsbsbssssss #miseryyyyyy #i. am. in. mIsery. there ain't noBOdy who can comFort me oh yea a #whY does this hAPPEN to me. the pain is slowly kiLLin me oh yEA #giUrl this is bAd. this is really baAad. now i've gotta si-IGn back. i've gotta Si-Ign back (in) #:/

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Cod Characters General Dating Headcanons (part three)

+ Random and Some bits of Chubby Fem S/O Headcanons with mentions of different nationality S/O

+ What type of BF/GF they would be

Including König, Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin, Keegan P. Russ, Philip Graves (+ some headcanons including the Shadows), Makarov

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Fem terms and pronouns like she/her are used for the reader

ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ

My rules for requests and characters I can write for

A/n: I tried so hard to get this one out in time with the other but my other wips are getting to me 😭. I posted twice today just to feed y'all ahaha.

Disclaimers/warnings: Typical Cod things, OOC characters???, Unrealistic, Some suggestive themes and language, I'm so sorry but English is not my first language so please don't come after me. Most of the content I've seen are on TikTok and Tumblr I don't actually play the game but I love the characters so much, same with any other content I have for other video games.

Tiny sidenote: the reader in this has been describe to be shorter than the characters and has been mentioned to have a soft body rather than the muscular type.

König

ꕥ (PLEASE DON'T COME AFTER ME, I DON'T KNOW ANY GERMAN AND I'M USING GOOGLE TRANSLATE)

ꕥ Speaking of König, I don't think this man is the shy boy that some people is making him out to be (not that he doesn't have that side at all, I just feel like they make it his whole personality). Based on voice lines alone this man is cocky asf.

ꕥ There's a reason for his mask, yes he was bullied as a child because of his looks and that's one of the causes to his social anxiety but that doesn't mean this mf is shy. He just like to avoid people and social interactions yk. (Y'all have no idea how much I can relate to this)

ꕥ Has and will continue to use his height to his advantage, someone bothering you while you're both sat having a wonderful time together? This mf stands the fuck up, shoulders back, chest out and everything. Looming over that person while glaring down, arms crossed while they're engulfed by the shadow of this 6'10 behemoth of a man.

ꕥ Chubby!Reader? He'll throw you over his shoulders, only using one arm below your ass while he carries you off. Seriously it is no problem to this man, he'd beg you to sit on his face and suffocate him. If anything I'd say he has a preference for it yk, very soft and plush reader for real.

ꕥ Our DIY king here wearing a shirt for a hood, his hair sticking out of the hole for the head whenever he's dressing casual. Play with his hair like right now, you'll make him melt right then and there.

ꕥ Enjoys cuddling, hasn't had many partners and by that I mean kinda none. Nobody was insane enough to approach him till you came around so he's very touch starved. He didn't even know he enjoyed touching that much till he was able to feel the amount of warmth your body gives him. He'd swear on his life that he was intoxicated in that moment.

ꕥ Whenever you sit or straddle on his lap, he's still so fucking tall. I swear you will gain neck pains if you wanna keep eye contact while talking to him. (I understand the struggle, I am a 5'1 girly. Every character I know within the CoD universe is taller than me 😭)

ꕥ Doesn't actually wear his mask around you, he's comfortable and trust you enough to know you wouldn't go around telling everyone what he looks like.

ꕥ Nicknames he'd call you in German are Mein Schatz, Fräulein, Liebling, Engel and Kleine Maus

ꕥ He's still definitely bitter about not being a sniper. (AHAHAHA)

Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin

ꕥ (IF I'M BEING HONEST, I DID NOT EXPECT HIS VOICE TO BE THAT DEEP. ALSO HIS VOICE LINES IN KOREAN/HANGUL (IDK WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT)

ꕥ He has doodles on his tactical gear that he did himself (there are also one that are a tribute to squid game because man's had a gambling addiction), has asked you to draw on it too and he proudly wears it when on duty. Will feel stupid while unconsciously smiling if you draw a heart.

ꕥ Writing something down on his vest from your own mother tongue and he's asking the meaning, if it's genuinely something good like a compliment or something like "I love you" then you will catch this man with a shit eating grin.

ꕥ He used to be a gambler before entering the military and it eventually got him to stop, though he still has a thing for risk, he got himself a more deadlier alternative.

ꕥ Expect surprise back hugs, this man isn't called Horangi for nothing. He's stealthy, I like to think that whatever he says to you is well thought out as well. Man knows how to think before he speaks.

ꕥ Horangi likes to pounce on things, just for the fun of it. It leads him to tackle you on your shared bed a lot, lots of play fighting too.

ꕥ HAS THE PRETTIEST EYES EVER. Like seriously, the only people who knows what he looks like is you and König. Had gentle eyes, you know that quote "His eyes softened", yeah that's the definition of his eyes.

ꕥ Loves it when you trace the veins on his arms with your finger nails, will just straight up offer his arm to you.

Keegan P. Russ

ꕥ This man and his panty dropping voice like holy hell I have never heard a voice as deep as his without a vocal fry (from those try hard guys on TikTok who try to hard thinking their thirst traps are good).

ꕥ Calls you "kid" in an affectionate way? It's honestly just what he calls anyone younger than him, you're shorter? He'll emphasize on that shit. Elaborating on the nickname I said earlier, he uses it less when y'all are dating but still does on some occasions.

ꕥ Would say the most dirty and uncalled for things, whispering it in your ears. He's and asshole in the best way possible, loves it when you gasp and playfully slap his chest.

ꕥ He's sweet though, would see you as his wife even if you're not married. You're his now, the moment you entered his life, he basically had a death grip on you.

ꕥ Something tells me that he likes talking about you or to you through radios yk. His voice sounding even deeper through the device, calling you doll even though he's supposed to refer to you with your call sign.

ꕥ Praise kink? I mean you've more likely heard his voice lines, is the type of man to praise you and ruffle your hair, either that or he'll kiss you depending on what stage of your relationship you are both in.

ꕥ Constantly thinks his eyes are weird even though they aren't, he just has sleepy eyes. Speaking of sleeping, I feel like he has such a fucked up sleeping schedule and is used to pulling all nighters more than the normal person.

ꕥ Will drag you in bed though and lay his whole weight on top of you because you ain't going nowhere, you are staying there with him and only him.

Philip Graves

ꕥ (If it isn't "Fix It Felix", please tell me I'm not the only one who sees it AHAHAHA)

ꕥ Philip is touchy, somebody for the love of everything that is holy cuddle this man please. He is just screaming at any type of physical contact at this point. (My sources? Right fucking here)

ꕥ Is the type of boyfriend to come home to you and just hug you, y'all would be there for a solid 10 minutes before he lets you go. Burying his head into your neck and just inhaling your scent while having his arms wrapped tightly around you.

ꕥ His Shadows? More like his fucking children, again going back to the TikTok. He knows how to get their attention, the little pats on the shoulder and small praises are his way of saying they did a good job and they're eating it up.

ꕥ That being said, you are either gonna be their mother figure or someone they enjoy protecting because their dad is so fond of you. Why not be both right?

ꕥ You cannot tell me this man won't be next to the grill, spatula, tongs or whatever kitchen utensil in one hand and a cold bottle of beer in the other.

ꕥ Spends his weekends with you on his lap while he watches football in your guys' couch, you're definitely scrolling on your phone during this.

ꕥ You cannot tell me this man doesn't wear cowboy hats and boots because he certainly does, is it a turn on or a turn off? I genuinely do not know..

ꕥ Is fruity on some aspects but would never fucking admit it..

Makarov

ꕥ Y'ALL ACTUALLY THOUGHT I'D WRITE FOR THIS MAN? NAH THIS ACC IS WHOLESOME (OR ANGSTY) AND ION THINK THIS MAN IS SALVAGEABLE. (This came from a girl who once was obsessed with Tom Riddle for years when she was 13, I recovered from it dw)

ꕥ This man would literally use anyone and anything as leverage for whatever he wants to achieve. (Yes I am one of those "I can fix him" people but damn idk if this man is fixable)

ꕥ Please don't tell me you actually genuinely think this man would be good to you.. I knew what I was writing was unrealistic but damn y'all are delulu on another level (so am I, stay delulu). Jokes aside I love y'all and he's one of the few I won't write for. (AHEM Severus Snape (that greasy mop haired mf)

ꕥ And yes I understand most of my shit are kind of OOC but damn if I wrote him, it would be extremely fucking far from canon and I don't like romanticizing toxic relationships (if I ever do write it, it will be angst and I can't ever promise a happy ending).

ꕥ Happy April fool's! (I know I'm posting this end of September (it's actually October now 😭)

#cod headcanons #cod x reader #cod mw2 #cod mwii #philip graves x reader #konig x reader #horangi x reader #keegan russ x reader #cod x female reader #cod x gn!reader #cod modern warfare #cod mwf2 #call of duty mw2 #mw2 #makarov x reader #satire #Aethelwyne Lia writes

[chao-thicc-hcs]

Hi there I really love your work and I was wondering if you could make a head cannon with hanma, manjiro/mikey and sanzu about "if their little sister was sexually harassed or touched inappropriately", not for any weird reasons I just really want comfort✌��😎 ( this is like my first time requesting anything so if it doesn't immediately notify when you respond could you maybe tag me? )

thank you!

a/n: my love goes out to everyone who's experienced such horrible things, including you, anon. ♡ i hope you're all feeling better and i am incredibly sorry, you never deserve it, nobody does.♡ love you all.♡

also, for further notice, i cannot tag you if you're anonymous, because i don't know your username. but your request was sent, thank you for the kind words!

featuring: bonten!sanzu, mikey; toman!sanzu, mikey; hanma shuji

warning(s): mentions of se!ual assault, death, bl00d, bone breaking, drug usage, weapons in general, torture

If their little sister got harassed

Hanma↷

The fucker that did this to her has signed a death contract

You know that shit is gonna go bad when he loses his grin

Will ask her to give him all possible details of the fucker, where she saw him, when it happened, how they looked

He's going to be with her the whole entire time, accompany her everywhere she goes, glaring at anyone who keeps their gaze on her for longer than 2 seconds

If she doesn't feel well, he will understand that, and won't force her to go outside if she refuses to. But he will always be in the same room as her, comforting her with pats and snacks

He's not good with words at all, and will comfort her by watching shows, playing games, or just buying her food

If she has the power to go out, Hanma will spoil her with gifts

Takes her to her favorite bakery and eats sweets with her, trying to make her forget about the encounter

Gives piggy back rides, deffo

For shits and giggles, he will tease her about their childhood memories and probably will chase her around a field, or play hide and seek with her

Always makes sure to check up on her, though, and walks with her to and after school

Definitely gets Kisaki involved and both devise a plan to hunt the bastard down and kill them

Spoiler - it's successful.

Hanma makes sure their death is slow and painful, torturing them first

Kisaki is filming everything

They touched you? Both their arms are now broken

They did something more? Their genitals are cut

If she has a strong stomach, Hanma won't hesitate to show her the video

Even after months and years, he will still interrogate every single new friend his sister makes, especially if it's a guy

toman!Mikey↷

He will cry

No, really, he deffo will cry with her

Buys tons of dorayaki and taiyaki to eat with her and bawl their eyes out together

Has a big blanket wrapped around them and asks Emma to make them lots of ramen to eat together

He will bring her with him at all times, and even when he cannot be around, he will tell either Draken or Takemichi to look after her

Follows you like a dog, he's way too afraid to let you out alone anymore

Emma will also comfort you with him, taking you shopping, making you cook with her and etc.

Mikey will be goofier so he makes you laugh, or he will do stupid shit that will make your life flash before your eyes, just so you forget about all that for a while

Always tries to talk to her and develop very deep topics (without any sexual ones) so she can relax around him and talk in peace

Asks for in depth narration of how her day went, listens to all the new gossip from school or just in general

Goes to the arcade with her. A huge try-hard that wins all the games and gets her plushies, competes with her on who will eat more taiyaki (he always wins but lets her win instead)

However, deep inside, under all this happiness, Mikey will be boiling with rage and is desperately trying to find the person who did this to her

He wants to deal with them alone, and he does so

Manages to get some information from her beforehand, and he makes sure the bastard never touches another human being again

Mikey ambushes him, and beats him to a pulp, carrying the blood of the assaulter with pride

bonten!Mikey↷

Oh lord

He will be furious, and it will be prominent even under his blank expression.

Goes insane, trashing and walking around the entire building like a maniac searching for their stash (after she's left, he doesn't want her to see him like this)

Asks her to tell him everything, absolutely

Immediately orders Kokonoi to take her out shopping, buy her all the shit she lays her eyes upon, and lets her order everyone around for the time being

If not, he doesn't leave the room without her, always supervises her and stays near her

Not good with words , but somehow tries making his presence more.. comforting around her

Doesn't act too harshly in front of her, so to not scare her

Pats her head and tells her "It's not your fault" "I'll make sure this never happens to you again."

Teaches her self defense, and buys her all sorts of pepper sprays, knives (he'd never let her use a gun or katana in her life) and etc.

Still asks his subordinates to keep an eye out on her when she has to go out (he cannot go out for obvious reasons)

Doesn't sleep until he finds who did this to her

Makes sure their death is gruesome and slow, and uses all torture methods bonten has to offer

toman!Sanzu↷

Doesn't say anything, nor has a hasty reaction

Would take her to a bakery, order cheesecake and listen to her vent about it

Listens attentively, and doesn't dare to interrupt

Abides by her wishes the entire day, buys her food, carries her on his back, does everything she asks him to

Another one who isn't good with words. But his love languge will be cleaning her room and taking over her chores, placing a packet of snacks on her desk, every time

Tells her teachers not to bother her too much until she's feeling better

Hugs her, but for no longer than 5 seconds

For the sake of her wellbeing, Sanzu lets her do his hair, his skin care, pluck his eyebrows, and even try on new make up

Watches her from the shadows, all the time. She doesn't notice him at all, but he's there, ready to act when needed

If she manages to give him information on how the person looked, Sanzu will hunt them down with Muto

Muto will beat them to a pulp, and Sanzu will cut off their fingers one by one

bonten!Sanzu↷

Man's furious

Doesn't even fucking wait, demands to find the fucker right now on the spot

He cannot sit straight knowing that the person hasn't been dealt with

Makes her choose how the bastard is dealt with. She wants him to get killed? Good. Drugged to death? Done. Tortured to the point of complete insanity and desperation? Hell yeah.

If she doesn't want to watch nor stay around, Sanzu will keep the bastard in a basement, torturing them every day.

As for comfort, he's not much different from his younger self.

Will probably ask her to do drugs with him but Ran and Rindou will punch him

Brings her random stray animals for her to pet and play with

Long, long night walks around the city, talking about random shit that makes her forget about everything

Lets her style his hair, again

Books trips to whenever, asking Koko to help with the money, of course. Most of the time it is outside Japan

Makes sure the memories are unforgettable (most of the time it's him doing crazy shit like starting random fights, tripping over, doing hand stands on children's playgrounds)

Enjoys playing their favorite music and dance with her

Gives her in depth lessons of how to use weapons, and would even lend her his katana (but will always supervise her)

©chao-thicc-hcs; reblogs are deeply appreciated, i always read your tags

#tokyo rev #tokyo revengers #tokyo rev headcanons #tokyo rev angst #tokyo revengers angst #hanma shuji #shuji hanma #mikey #sano manjiro #manjiro sano #sanzu haruchiyo #haruchiyo sanzu

[chosokamolvr]

pretty lips...

joshua rosfield x male reader

- nsfw under the cut

"has anyone ever told you that you've got really pretty lips?" [name] asked, running a finger over joshua's lips. they were so pretty, a nice shade of pink, glossy, and so plump looking.

joshua shook his head, chuckling slightly before moving [name]'s hand away. "no, nobody's ever told me that. you are the first person to do so i suppose." he hums, tracing over the spot [name] touched with his own finger.

[name] smiled at joshua's reaction. "well, i am glad that i am the first. can i kiss those lips of yours?" [name] speaks softly and gently, which caused joshua to swoon and nod his head frantically.

the two men then kissed. it was sweet, but it seemed like there was an underlying tone of passion as their tongues clashed against eachother. joshua let out a small yelp as he felt [name]'s tongue enter his mouth, but he didn't pull away.

and then that's what lead the two men to this moment..

[name] had a hand in joshua's hair, gripping it tightly as he was backed into a corner. joshua was on his knees, his tongue lapping at [name]'s dick.

"shit-" [name] grunted, tugging onto joshua's hair tightly. "just put it in already.. stop teasing.." [name] groaned, clearly dissatisfied by joshua's actions.

joshua then did as he was told and put the whole length of [name]'s dick into his mouth, head bobbing up and down his throat. all [name] could do was watch as his whole dick disappeared down joshua's throat, and it was honestly such a sight. who would've known the dominant of the phoenix would be doing something like this?

[name] kept staring at joshua's lips that were wrapped around his dick. it made him more turned on than he was before. he kept gripping onto joshua's hair, slowly thrusting his hips forward to get a pace on. joshua's eyes widened and he gagged a little before adjusting to this new pace.

"fuck.. joshua.." [name] groaned again, picking up the pace of his thrusts. joshua just kept moving his head up and down to the pace of [name]'s thrusts, looking him in the eyes as he did so. "you look so pretty.. slobbering all over my cock." [name] chuckled, ruffling joshua's hair before gripping onto a handful of it.

joshua started to tear up. the pace [name] was going at was fast - but it wasn't painful. yet, it still made joshua tear up because it just felt so good. he felt like the luckiest man ever right now..

[name] then suddenly tensed up, his grip on joshua's hair getting tighter. "fuck- fuck.. i'm about to cum" and before the man could pull out, his finished inside of joshua's mouth. [name] then pulled his dick out of joshua's mouth, some of joshua's saliva and his own cum coating it.

joshua swallowed [name]'s cum, opening his mouth to show [name] it was all gone. at the sight, [name] got another boner. it was going to be a long day for joshua...

the next day, [name] and joshua are in the ale hall at the hideaway, waiting for clive to show up. when he shows up, he greets the two men, confused why joshua isn't speaking.

"ah... i think he got sick, a sore throat i presume, when we were out on a comission yesterday. poor boy." [name] chuckled, but in reality, it was a whole different story he would rather not tell clive.

#joshua rosfield #joshua rosfield smut #ffxvi smut #ff16 smut #final fantasy xvi #final fantasy 16 #joshua rosfield x male reader #joshua rosfield x reader #x reader #x male reader #ffxvi #ff16 #ff16 joshua #ffxvi joshua #foryou #male reader #reader #gay

[alwaysjustmina]

Whispers of Rain

Chapter 12: Just a Stoic Statue, Fit for Nobody

Thank you to @papaslittlesunshine for editing this and @midnight-moth for listening to my daily depraved thoughts. Also, thank you to @kamonart for the beautiful artwork for this story.

Fyi this chapter may hurt, but no major warnings.

Below the cut or AO3

Rain awoke in the very early morning hours, the darkness of outside just starting to be pushed away. He reached to curl around Dew, to pull him close and realized with a stabbing jolt to his being that Dew wasn’t next to him, the panic quick to overtake his thoughts. He rushed from the bed to Aether’s room, waking him and yelling that they needed to find him. They searched the house, before finding themselves outside Eidolon’s room, the door slightly cracked. They slowly opened the door to find both Dew and Eidolon fast asleep grasping each other in a tight embrace. Rain gasped quietly before he pulled back hurriedly from the room. Aether followed him silently, pulling the bedroom door shut firmly. He had seen Rain’s eyes when he turned from the room. The sorrow, the questions. His heart broke for what was in front of all of their faces.

“Rain, wait.” Aether quietly spoke. Rain stopped but didn’t turn. His shoulders hunched over, his arms around his middle, holding himself.

Aether quickly enveloped him from behind in a hug,holding him. “You need to give him time, we don’t know the extent of what they’ve been through, they have only had each other.” Rain nodded, but couldn’t contain the quiet cry bursting from his body.

“I just want to hold him, I want to take away the pain, I want to be the one he goes to.”

Nothing Aether could say would take away the pain, he knew that Dew just needed time though. Rain knew this too, but it still couldn’t stop his heart from breaking.

Dew had awoken in the middle of the night, curled into Rain’s arms. The dream he had just had broke him out of sound sleep, a sleep like he hadn’t had in many, many months. He was still in shock that he was here with Rain again, that it was his arms encircling his body. He watched Rain as he slept, breathing in and out slowly, his pouty lips wet with spit. In his sleep, his hair had fallen across face, Dew reached up to push it out of his face, gently moving it from in front of his eyes. His hand lingered in his hair as he tucked it behind Rain’s ear, marveling at the silkiness.

As he touched his hair lightly, Rain scrunched his nose before emitting a soft sigh and a smile graced his lips. He was beautiful, this perfect creature who somehow ended up in love with Dew. Dew had missed him so badly, when Ifrit had said he was dead, he had stupidly believed him. His world had shattered into multiple pieces, pieces he never thought he would be able to pick back up and put in anything resembling a shape. The only way he was functioning now was because of Eidolon. He had seen him through the dark, held his hand to the other side so that he could once again see Rain, be present and thankful for his love.

I don’t deserve him.

I don’t deserve either of them.

I am disgusting.

How can they say they love me?

Debilitating thoughts plagued his mind as he watched Rain sleep. The fear overtaking his insides so quickly it left him breathless. His mind seizing in pain, he pulled out of Rain’s grasp. He wasn’t worthy of his comfort.

Dew quietly padded from the bed towards the door, he needed to get out of this room before he woke him, before he lost his shit. He turned back towards Rain before he shut the door, the moonglow from outside played across his face, his hand reaching across the bed, searching for the man he used to know. That Dew didn’t exist here any longer.

Dew had planned to go downstairs to sit on the couch and await the dawn alone, but his plans changed when he heard a whimper from the bedroom next to them. He quickly made his way into Eidolon’’s room, opening the door to make sure he was ok. Their eyes met across the room, Neither able to sleep it seemed.

“You ok?” Dew asked quietly as he sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for Eidolon to respond.

“I don’t know. You ok?”

“I don’t know.” Dew answered back the same words, the same meaning.

Eidolon pushed back the covers and reached for Dew, offering his hand to hold. Dew quickly took his hand in his, grasping it tightly. As Eidolon watched he saw the tremor take over Dew’s body, the tears streaming down his face. He quickly sat up and pulled Dew to him, his arms encircling his waist, bringing him closer.

“I don’t know if I can do this?” He said between broken sobs.

“Do what?” Eidolon asked, “You can do anything, you are the strongest person I have ever met.”

“I was ready for death, I was ready for it to be over, I knew what I was going to do last night, my only goal was to get you out of there before I ended it all.”

“Dew.”

“It was my only priority.” He held his head in his hand, the other gripping onto Eidolon as if he was his only anchor to this world. His breathing broken, the hitching in his voice carrying his sorrow and fear.

Eidolon pulled him closer,bringing him to sit on his lap, his chin hooked over his shoulder, brushing his hair from his face. Eidolon let him get it all out in the quiet morning hours, just whispering words of encouragement as he caressed his back and ran his hand through his hair. It took awhile but Dew slowly relaxed in his arms.

“I don’t deserve him,” he whispered quietly when the sobbing had stopped.

Eidolon’s heart broke for him, broke for himself, broke for Rain. He didn’t know what to say, he just held him tighter.

“I don’t deserve you, either.” Dew said it so quietly, Eidolon wasn’t sure he heard him right.

“Dew you deserve everything, you protected us, both of us. This wasn’t your fault what Ifrit did.”

Dew shook his head and looked at Eidolon, “Yes, it is. I loved him, why didn’t I see that he was this messed up? I am just as messed up as him for loving him, this is my fault.”

Eidolon knew he wasn’t going to get through to him, he was lost in his fear and memories of the last months. As they held each other, their pain mirroring the others, they slowly lost the battle against exhaustion and reclined further back on the bed until they were laying side by side, arms and legs entwined. Holding onto the other as if their lives depended on it.

Dew and Eidolon made their way downstairs the next morning, not saying anything. Dew knew Rain was probably up, and he knew if he had seen them together that he would have had a lot of questions. Questions Dew wasn’t sure if he was ready to answer.

Aether and Rain were sitting in the dining room, next to the kitchen, in silence, the looks on their faces looked like they had been having an in depth conversation. Did they stop because of Dew and Eidolon?

“Dew, Eidolon, coffee?” Aether asked as he saw them, he quickly rose from his seat across from Rain and moved towards the pot to pour for the two of them when they both nodded. Dew moved into Aether’s vacated seat, Eidolon sitting beside him. He looked up to see Rain already looking at him, his eyes haunted and blood shot. Yeah, Rain knew he had fallen asleep in Eidolon’s room. He quickly looked away to see Aether approach the table with two steaming cups and placed them in front of them before grabbing his and Rain’s to refill as well.

The silence around the table was uncomfortable, not how Rain nor Dew thought their reunion would be. All Rain wanted was Dew next to him, with his hand in his, they could face everything else as it came, together. It felt though that they were worlds apart though. Rain knew that Dew had been through alot and he had to give him time, his heart just grieved that he wasn’t the person Dew turned to. He silently wiped the tears forming in his eyes hopefully before anyone saw them.

Clearing his throat as he sat, Aether asked, “You both are probably hungry, what would you like, there is stuff here, but I can run out if I need to.”

Eidolon spoke up, he knew Dew was spiraling and he had seen the tears in Rain’s eyes, “Yes, it has been a day since either of us have eaten and I know Dew has lost weight here, so anything would be good.”

“Ok then, I can do that. Care to help me?” He asked Eidolon.

Eidolon looked at Dew before agreeing to assist, Dew nodded his head at him, indicating that he would be ok. He hated the idea of leaving Dew alone after last night, not alone but without him being there if he needed him again. He knew he had Rain, but he still wanted to be his friend.

In the kitchen, Aether was already pulling out all the ingredients to make breakfast. He couldn’t get over the fact that he was his brother. There was a small glimmer of hope in his chest that he would get to know him, or that whatever was wrong with his memory would fix itself so he could remember him, remember his family.

Aether could see Eidolon struggling with all of the stress of the situation, but he had to get him out of that room so that Dew and Rain could talk. He wished he could hold his baby brother and tell him he would take away all of the pain, all of the past memories with Ifrit, but he was terrified that gesture would be rejected. Instead, he handed Eidolon ingredients to start working with. They worked in relative silence for a while before Eidolon broke the silence.

“Do you think Dew is ok?” He asked tentatively.

“You care about him a lot, don’t you?” Aether mumbled quietly before adding, “He will be fine, I have never seen a stronger connection than what those two have, they just need a moment to talk.”

Eidolon twisted his hands, his nerves showing through his motions, “I just don’t want him to feel alone or like he has to save all of us.”

Aether turned to look at Eidolon, studying the set of his jaw, the slight wobble of his chin, his eyes glassy. He reached out to put a hand on Eidolon’s arm before saying, “You’ve got me, Eidolon. I promise I will do whatever I can to keep you safe, Dew can take a break from that position. It will give him and Rain time to reunite and you and I to get to know each other again.”

Still Eidolon looked through the door to the dining room, trying to make sure Dew was ok. He kept telling himself, don’t be selfish, Rain is his mate, he doesn’t want you, it doesn’t matter that you are in love with him.

Aether watched him as he kept looking back and forth, he knew as he watched, that Eidolon was in love with Dew. Oh, baby, Phantom,, he thought, I wish I could take that heartbreak from you.

“Would you like to get to know me?” Aether spoke up, pulling Eidolon’s attention back to him.

Eidolon didn’t respond at first as studied he Aether, trying to see if he was being sincere. He decided to take that first step though and silently nodded his head. They had all the time in the world and he looked forward to getting to know him and maybe to distract himself from his heart breaking.

*******************************************

When Rain and Dew were alone in the room the silence stretched even further. Neither knowing how or where to start. Finally Rain broke the silence.

“How did you sleep?” There was no bitterness in his words, only concern.

“I had a nightmare and couldn’t sleep so I got up and walked around for a while.” Not mentioning his trip into Eidolon’s room.

Rain’s eyes looked everywhere but at Dew as he responded, “You know you could have woken me, I want to be there for you when you're hurting.”

Dew couldn’t respond, he knew this, he knew he could wake Rain and he would do whatever was needed to make Dew happy, safe, loved. Dew was broken though, Rain didn’t need to know the extent of how much.

Rain made the first move, putting his hand on the table, open to see if Dew would hold it. Dew looked at it and a sob bubbled to the surface before he grabbed the lifeline Rain offered. They both cried as they held hands before Rain, whispered, “Come here.”

On shaky legs Dew moved to sit next to Rain, crashing into his side as he put his arm around Dew and held their bodies flush together. Dew continued to cry as Rain held him. Whispering in his ear, “I love you, Dewdrop, you don’t need to hide from me, I am here. Whatever you need, I am here, always.”

No more words were said, this wasn’t the time, they needed to have a conversation, but needed the time that having two other people in a room next to them didn’t afford. They clung to each other before they were interrupted by the others bringing in heaping platefuls of food to the table.

Plates were set in front of Rain and Dew filled to the brim with different choices of savory and sweet. The other two sat across from them as they dug into their food. Rain picked up his fork to eat while still keeping an arm around Dewdrop. When Dew made no move to eat and just pushed his plate away, Rain nudged his side and whispered that he had to eat something even if it was just a few bites. When he still didn’t eat, Rain didn’t push it further, he leaned down and kissed Dew’s forehead before continuing with his food.

Eidolon noticed the exchange and when Rain didn’t push he became irritated, Dew needed to eat, he knew it had been days since his last meal, his energy quickly depleting because of it. He wouldn’t let Dew give up.

“Dew, you have to eat.”

“I am not hungry, Eidolon.” He mumbled back.

“Dew it has been days since you have eaten anything.”

When he didn’t answer or move to his plate, Eidolon continued. “Dew, please, I won’t let you give up.”

Rain looked up at Eidolon, he wondered if anyone else heard the unspoken, “even if Rain will.” He knew that was where Eidolon was going with it, who did he think he was that he knew Dew better than him? Where did he get off?

“Dew-”

“Give it a rest, he said he wasn’t hungry.” Rain had it, couldn’t he just take care of Dew himself, just let him have some time.

“No, I won’t give it a rest, he needs to eat. Why aren’t you pushing it more? I thought you cared about him.”

WHAT? Rain quickly pushed his chair from the table, seething in anger, how dare he question how he felt about Dew, he didn’t know what they went through. He didn’t care if Eidolon had been there for Dew these past months, he was done with everyone else in their relationship. As the chair fell backwards on the floor, Rain was already on the other side of the table pulling Eidolon to his feet.

“How dare you! You may have been with him these past months, but I know Dewdrop. I know when to push, I know when to leave it until later, we are mated in all but the ceremony. He is exhausted, he hasn’t slept, he doesn’t eat well after a restless night.” He had grabbed onto the front of Eidolon’s shirt as he yelled in his face.

Eidolon didn’t back down though, “How dare I? Really? I know Dewdrop too, he is exhausted because he hasn’t eaten, do you even know what he has been through these past months. Do you? You may be practically mated, but you are an idiot if you think you should let this go.”

“Fuck you!”

They were at each other's throats before Dew could even get around the table between them, screaming at them to stop. They both looked down at Dew as he begged them to quit and pulled away from each other, mumbling a sorry to Dew. Not to each other.

“I will eat, Eidolon, just give me a minute.” Eidolon looked at Rain when Dew couldn’t see his face with a triumphant smirk. Dew continued, “Rain, Rain, it is ok, you are right, I don’t normally eat when I feel like this. For you, I will try though.”

Rain may have wanted to stick his tongue out at Eidolon, but he refrained.

“So, um, yeah, we need to decide when we should go back in town to go through the portal back to the abbey.” Aether interjected to bring noise to the quiet room, Dew picked at his food as both Eidolon and Rain watched him and each other. Aether knew that the two of them were going to have it out, he just didn’t necessarily think it was best to have that argument in front of Dew or before they went back topside.

“Ifrit isn’t going to stop, he is going to know I went to the surface.” Dew grimaced between bites.

“Yeah we are going to have to take care of him before we go too.” Aether replied.

“Take care of?” Eidolon asked, turning from Rain’s glare.

“Yes, Rain has to stop him, he is the only one that can due to the agreement we made coming here.”

“What? Absolutely not.” Dew now was the one shouting at the group.

“It is ok, Dew. I will be ok.” Rain tried to sooth.

“Rain, he is only going to be more vicious, we embarrassed him yesterday. He will be on a rampage and ready for the attack.” The tears had filled his eyes again as he begged. Why didn’t they all let him take care of Ifrit yesterday? Why?

“It is the only way, and Aether can go with me. We have a plan.”

They didn’t leave the house that day, eating, sleeping, trying to regain some strength. Rain longed for Dew to talk to him, but he wouldn’t push. The day turned into days. Every night, Rain would go to bed with Dew and in the morning he would still be entwined in Eidolon’s arm. It was slowly destroying him that Dew wouldn’t turn to him.

Rain came across Eidolon one of those mornings as he came out of the bedroom he knew Dew was for sure in, he couldn’t even look at Eidolon as he closed the door behind him.

Eidolon could hear his sigh as he went to pass him in the hall.

“What Rain?”

“Nothing, Eidolon.”

“No, Rain, I know your pissed he comes to me every night, but I won’t turn him away. You need to stop thinking of the Dew you used to know. Again you have no idea what he has been through, do you?” Eidolon was done, last night he pulled Dew to him as he sobbed, feeling unworthy of Rain’s love. “Do you know what Ifrit did to him? Do you have any idea? Cause I saw it all with my own eyes, and I am telling you I wouldn’t have survived it, I don’t know how he did. If it helps for me to hold him or offer him support, I will do, be whatever he needs.”

Rain met Eidolon’s eyes, he had a pretty good idea of what Dew had been through. He was told about the party and what happened with Dew up against the wall that his friends had seen. He just wanted to be the one he turned to, was that so wrong?

Eidolon crowded Rain to the wall with a growl when he didn’t respond. “Get your head out of your feelings, and be there for him.”

Rain watched as Eidolon walked off before he stepped back into his room, sliding to the floor, not knowing how to help Dew.

The next time it happened he awoke to Dew moving from the bed, darkness outside the window. “Please don’t go to him,” Rain begged in silent whispers to Dewdrop.

When Dew heard his plea, he turned to Rain. “Rain, I can’t…I can’t, you don’t know what Ifrit did.”

“Tell me Dew, let me be the one you turn to, I love you, I know you went through torture, but I want to be the one you need in the darkness of the night. Let me be the one,” he begged.

His eyes remained fixed on the sheets between them, the rumpled linen, Rain’s hand reaching towards him but afraid to touch, afraid to show him how much he needed him. The unanswered question of why did he go to Eidolon, when Rain was here, Rain was the one he vowed to love forever. Did they let Ifrit destroy what they had?

Dew pushed from his seated position in the bed, to stand. The noise that Rain emitted was filled with so much sorrow that again, Dew turned from him and was going to someone else. Dew didn’t leave though, he turned back around and grabbed Rain’s hand asking him, why? Why did it matter who got to hear what he went though, he didn’t want Rain to know.

Rain stared into his eyes, how could he ask that? Rain didn’t want to hear the horrible things Ifrit did, but he wanted to be there for Dew, anything for him, and if that meant hearing all the horrible things he would listen, he would comfort him.

“It will kill me, Dew, if you go to him.” He cried into the sheets, “ I am sorry, I shouldn’t put that on you.”

Dew crawled back into the bed to hold Rain this time, arms wrapped around him. He’d stay, he couldn’t do this to Rain. He didn’t want to but he was going to have to share with Rain what Ifrit did, that he wasn’t sure if Ifrit put a child in him.

He only hoped Rain could forgive him for what he allowed to happen.

#whispers of rain #chapter fic #rain ghoul #dewdrop ghoul #nameless ghouls #the band ghost #raindrop #fan fiction #ghost fan fiction #ghost band #mina writes #eidolon #phantom ghoul #aether ghoul

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

Please don't make any sudden moves (you don't know the half of the abuse)

Or the AU in which WWX isn't as touchy as in canon

Warnings: implications of mental and physical abuse

Hopefully posting it properly this time because Tumblr got me fucked up the first time

But Lan Wangji has been spending enough time with Wei Ying, around him, to see the momentary flinch he's trying so hard to suppress, the flash of panic in his eyes every time someone else tries to initiate any kind of physical contact with him.

Wei Ying flinches.

Lan Wangji has keen eyes, and he notices things that others may not. And it's his keen eyes that see it - because otherwise, it's nearly impossible to pick up on if you don't know where to look.

Wei Ying flinches like somebody for whom touch has only been painful.

Lan Wangji knows, because he has seen it before.

Some of his cousins, react like that too, after they've been disciplined one too many times.

Even brother reacts like that sometimes. He's never told Wangji why, but it's not hard to guess. Especially as some of the elders do recount the unruly days of the First Jade out loud over tea every now and then, and applaud themselves for having disciplined him.

Lan Wangji knows what that means. He's been good - outstandingly, exceptionally good all his life so he could avoid it.

But Wei Ying isn't a Lan. The Jiang sect isn't like them. Jiang Wanyin doesn't flinch.

Why does Wei Ying?

They're in the library again.

Wei Ying is writing down the rules - or whatever it is that he's doing - and Lan Wangji finds himself studying the other carefully. There are no visible signs on his body, no marks or brands or anything. Even when they shared the cold springs, Lan Wangji didn't see anything out of place.

(Not that he looked that carefully over Wei Ying's naked glistening skin... but! Bruises and scars attract attention... but there were none.)

Wei Ying acts like his usual, unbothered self, humming as he writes, not a shadow of anything negative on his face.

It doesn't make sense.

He hands Lan Wangji some silly drawing an hour later, and when, irritated with the incessant noise of Wei Ying asking him all sorts of things, he angrily reaches over the table, towards Wei Ying, to throw the paper away - he sees it again.

The barely suppressed flinch, the wide eyes, the fear.

It makes Lan Wangji's stomach churn.

"Wei Ying..."

He doesn't reply, not knowing whether to open his mouth or keep quiet, eyes darting quickly between the paper and Lan Wangji.

He speaks as if he's weighing the words a hundred times before they come out, and he's watching Lan Wangji's reactions with a very poorly concealed panic.

“S-sorry...um... I didn’t think you’d actually get so angry with me... I was just trying to tease you a bit like I always do... I’ll just... go over there and finish my work now...”

Lan Wangji is left with even more questions now - and with the terrible realization that Wei Ying is... Wei Ying is scared of him.

Scared of him too.

"I wasn't- actually angry." He finally finds it in himself to speak a few agonizing minutes later. "Don't - you have no reason to be afraid of me." An attempt at a comforting smile. "I'll never hurt you."

Wei Ying stares at him, his eyes stormy and unreadable, before they slowly fill with tears that Wei Ying can't blink away.

"Sorry, I- I don't know why I..." he's quick to wipe the little droplets off his cheeks, despite the many that follow. "I... nobody ever noticed..."

"I am here, Wei Ying. If you wish to talk-"

Lan Wangji finds himself pulled into a hug over the little writing table, feels Wei Ying's tears fall against the side of his neck.

"I know you hate touching but... can we stay like this for a little while?"

"It is not comfortable."

And so, Lan Wangji easily pulls Wei Ying into his lap and refuses to think anything traitorous of the position they're in now.

Wei Ying burrows in his chest, wonders if he's dreaming or if something is possessing Lan Wangji right now - but decides to bask into it nevertheless.

"I've never been afraid of you, Lan Zhan. I'll never be."

---

There is war, bloodshed, Wei Ying disappears for three months and returns more dead than alive.

This time, he doesn't allow Lan Wangji to comfort him.

Wei Ying flinches again.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wangxian #writing attempts #i hope this posts right this time ugh

[randomperson3736]

His first love

Paring(s): Evan "Buck" Buckley x reader

Warning(s): none I think?

Genre: umm, idk?

Word bank: Y/N- your name

Summary: You were Buck's first love and as he watches you walk down the aisle he remembers all the times you had together when you were still his.

Notes: I am in love with this man! And for some reason I keep getting ideas for him so I'm gonna write before I forget them cus I am a dory ✌️

(Listen to this while reading)👇👇👇

~~~~~

I am not the only traveler

Who has not repaid his debt

I've been searching for a trail to follow again

Take me back to the night we met

~~~~~

Buck stared at you, adoringly. Something the 118 and your friends found common, ever since he'd found you there was some sort of light illuminating from him. As if your presence alone was able to change him for the better, as if you complete him.

Suddenly every memory flashes before his eyes. The first date, the stupidest moments together, the exhausting fights. It was all memories he wouldn't ever replace.

~~~~~

And then I can tell myself

What the hell I'm supposed to do

And then I can tell myself

Not to ride along with you

~~~~~

The very first moment his lips met yours, to the time you both wanted a family together, you were his first love– no his greatest love. And Buck knew no one would receive the love you had received from him. His love was only for you and nobody would be able to take that love from you. You remian in his heart as you do in his memory and mind.

~~~~~

And then I can tell myself

What the hell I'm supposed to do

And then I can tell myself

Not to ride along with you

~~~~~

Like a curse– you plagued Buck's heart.

It was pain he accepted, the only pain he liked. Pain from you is his favourite pain after all. It's from you. He'll embrace it. No matter how painful it gets, for you he'll keep going.

Even at this moment your memories with him clouded his thoughts, as everyone looked at you– his eyes were by far the most glued onto your walking figure, memories rushing through the course of his mind, like a disease– slowly ending him.

Those memories Buck loved, the memories he treasured. As they remian memories, and as you walk down the aisle.

~~~~~

I had all and then most of you

Some and now none of you

Take me back to the night we met

I don't know what I'm supposed to do

Haunted by the ghost of you

Oh, take me back to the night we met

~~~~~

Buck stared at you. Admired you like he always has, though perhaps this is the last time? He knows that's not possible. Wherever you are, whoever you're with, Buck would always be the one to admire you the most. As his first love, you own his heart entirely.

As you walk, inches and seconds away from becoming someone else's spouse, he smiled.

Buck knew he couldn't search his heart for love again, as he never wanted to let you go. Perhaps that's why it wounded him so much. Maybe it was because he was too much of a coward to purpose? Or was it simply just because he had let you go?

He had searched every nook and cranny of his mind to find the answers. But unfortunately he could never find the right answer.

~~~~~

When the night was full of terrors

And your eyes were filled with tears

When you had not touched me yet

Oh, take me back to the night we met

~~~~~

You've gotten the life you've always talked to him about, though this time it wasn't him by your side.

Your eyes met his just for a moment– oh those eyes, how they wound him. If you had known how much he hurt, would you come back? As silly and selfish as it was, he wanted you– no– he needed you back. But it was too late. He was too late.

'Y/N looks beautiful, just like she always had.' He thought with a small smile painted on his face.

~~~~~

I had all and then most of you

Some and now none of you

Take me back to the night we met

I don't know what I'm supposed to do

Haunted by the ghost of you

Take me back to the night we met

~~~~~

#first love #even buck buckley #x reader #x yn #buck x reader #evan buckley x you #reader x 911 #Spotify #fyp #buck 911 #wedding #kinda sad #the night we met #evan buckley x reader

[nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius]

TBB Incorrect Quotes, Part 12

Omega: Why are Hunter and Crosshair sitting with their backs to each other? Tech: They had a fight. Omega: Then why are they holding hands? Tech: They get sad when they fight.

Omega: Hey besties- Crosshair: Die. Omega: What did I do to you-

Hunter to Crosshair: Turn that frown upside-down!  *a little while later* Hunter: What are you doing?  Crosshair, trying to do a handstand: You told me to “turn that frown upside-down” but it’s not working. Hunter: I taught Gonky a new trick. *throws ball* Fetch! Gonky: *just stands there* Tech: He didn’t do it. Hunter: I taught him to ignore social conventions and think for himself.

Crosshair: Hold the fuck up.  Wrecker: Excuse me?  Crosshair: I said hold the fuck up.  Wrecker: Crosshair: I’m the fuck up, hold me.

Wrecker: But that place is haunted. Omega: Ghosts prey on fear. Just be confident! Wrecker, marching into the haunted house: I AM NOT SCARED! I AM NOT A PUSSY!

Echo: I’ve come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than fuck.

Echo: What’s your greatest weakness? Tech: Interpreting the semantics of a question, but ignoring the pragmatics. Echo: Could you give an example? Tech: Yes, I could.

Tech: Are you this rude to everyone?!  Crosshair: Yup.  Crosshair: Don't think you're special.

Wrecker: There was a motor close to where I am right now.  Echo: A motor- a motorcycle?  Wrecker: Oh sorry, a murder.  Crosshair: That escalated quickly.

Echo: Okay, can we all stop saying stupid shit for a moment, please?!  Tech: Alright. Crosshair: Hey, I-  Echo: SHUT UP!  Crosshair: I HAVEN'T EVEN FINISHED MY SENTENCE!!  Tech: It was bound to be stupid. 

Echo: I’m so tired. Wrecker: Did you get to bed late? Echo: No. Wrecker: Did you do something strenuous? Echo: No. Wrecker: Then why are you tired? Echo: I’m alive. Wrecker: Sounds exhausting.

Crosshair: You know what they say. No pain, no gain. Hunter: What exactly do you have to gain from BLEEDING OUT?!

Crosshair: *mixing different alcoholic beverages together* Wrecker: What are you making? Crosshair: A mistake.

Crosshair: How does that even work?  Wrecker, mocking him: hOw dO yOu UsE a cOmPUteR aNd KnOw wHaTS GoiNg oN iT DoEsNt mAke SeNSe?!  Crosshair: Your face doesn’t make sense.

Wrecker, taping a knife onto a Roomba: Be free, my child.  Tech, entering the room with a small cut on his ankle: Who the f-

Wrecker: You’re overthinking this.  Echo: You don’t know the appropriate level of thinking, Wrecker. What if I’m underthinking?

Hunter: Where’s Omega? Crosshair: Around. Hunter: Around? Hunter: You don’t have any idea, do you? Omega, dropping down from above: Did you know there’s a space above the ceiling?

Tech: So you're looking for information on this thing, huh? Well, I feel like it must be from far away.  Omega: What makes you say that?  Tech: If it's something even I don't know about, then I'm sure nobody else must have a clue. So it's gotta be from some faraway place. Impeccable reasoning, isn't it?  Omega: Tech... You don't have a clue about this thing, do you?  Tech: *screams in anger* 

Hunter: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?  Tech: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

Wrecker: How many vampires do you think have been hit by a car backing up in a parking lot because the driver couldn’t see their reflection?  Tech: I’ve never considered it but you’re really shining light on what’s probably a very serious issue.

Crosshair: Shut up, you’re messing with my train of thought!  Echo: I thought you didn’t have a brain and now you say you have thoughts?

Crosshair: I love saying 'fuck me' because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly.

Tech: Do you know that we are made out of atoms?  Tech: And atoms never touch each other.  Tech: So in my defense, officer, I did not punch Admiral Tarkin.

Crosshair, texting Echo: Roses are red, Tony Hawk is a skater…  Echo′s phone, auto-replying: I’m driving right now–I’ll get back to you later.  *Later*  Echo, texting back: Fuck you.

Echo: I’m having salad for dinner!  Tech: Echo: Well, fruit salad.  Echo: Actually, it’s mostly grapes.  Tech: Echo: Okay, it’s all grapes.  Echo: Fermented grapes.  Tech: Echo: Tech: Echo: It’s wine.  Echo: I’m having wine for dinner.

Hunter: But seriously, what is the real plan here that has to do with not fucking around?  Tech: There is no plan that does not involve fucking around. But we will make sure all of our fucking around will be applied in a constructive direction.

Echo, Entering Wrecker's room: Crosshair did it again.  Wrecker: Peace disturbance?  Echo: What no-  Wrecker: Arson..?  Echo: NO, JESUS CHRIST, HOW MANY-  Wrecker: uh....Attempted murder?  Echo: NO, HE ATE ALL THE FOOD IN THE FRIDGE, BUT WHAT THE FU-

Tech: Phee and I are no longer dating. Phee: Tech, that’s a horrible way of telling people we’re married.

Hunter: You know what bothers me? Bats. Why can bats fly?  Tech: Not again!  Hunter: No. Seriously, who gave them the right? They're mammals! Mammals walk on land, no exceptions.  Echo: Just wait until you hear about whales.  Hunter: What now?

Crosshair: So what, now I’m just supposed to do everything that Tech does? What if he jumps off a cliff?  Wrecker: If Tech were to jump off a cliff, he would have done his due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry. So yes, if you see Tech jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.  Crosshair: You jump off a cliff! Wrecker: Gladly, provided Tech did first. 

*Crosshair rushes by with an armful of water bottles*  Omega: What's going on?  Hunter: Crosshair wouldn't drink water.  Omega: ...And?  Hunter: And I asked him how fast he could chug an entire bottle.  Crosshair, loudly: 16 OUNCES IN TEN SECONDS, BITCHES!

Hunter: Y’know, maybe things aren’t so bad. I’m here. I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts. Wrecker: Hey, Hunter.  Hunter: GODDAMNIT!

Tech: Underestimate me. That'll be fun.

Hunter: What does “take out” mean?  Omega: Food.  Wrecker: Dating.  Echo: Murder.  Crosshair: It can be all three if you’re brave enough. 

Crosshair: Stop asking me if I’m straight, gay, bi, whatever. I identify as a FUCKING THREAT.

#tbb incorrect quotes #incorrect bad batch quotes #the bad batch #tbb #star wars #incorrect quotes #tech chose violence for this round apparently

[foodsies4me]

Hey!! Your working titles were killing me, and I am genuinely curious about so many of them but I would love something from either “Why do these OC-s-have so many backdtory-NOBODY cares Lys” (because I honestly do love your OC’s) or the dragons one (cause I’m always a sucker for dragons).

Hope you are having a good weekend! 💙

Alrigh, somebody else asked for the "Why do these OC-s-have so many backdtory-NOBODY cares Lys” so I'll share the snippet in that ask, so this one will be the dragon one! This is a post-season 3 fic, in which Magnus turns into a dragon after absorbing Edom's power. It starts a bit angsty because Magnus doesn't know what's happening. It also includes some body horror when Magnus gets turned into a dragon before it devolves into fluff because dragon!Magnus is just as besotted as regular!Magnus even when he just turned and is 100% working on instinct.

Alec is just happy to have his boyfriend back.

And my weekend went well, I hope yours did too!💜

The fire in his blood keeps growing, morphing into something more. Different. Changed. His skin itches and pulls, his magic beating inside of him like a caged animal as his body grows too small, too constraining. Alexander is worried. Magnus knows he is. He sees it in the permanent frown on his face or the hesitation in his eyes when he reaches out. Alexander has always been free in his affections, free and unafraid in a way that Magnus can't help but admire. Magnus hates that he's changing that, that he's making Alexander doubt his touch is nothing but dearly wanted, but he can't stop. The inferno inside of him keeps growing worse. Growing painful. Growing out of control. And Magnus can't hurt Alexander. Not like that. Not with his magic. But the itching is growing, tearing him apart cell by cell from within, and, as much as Magnus usually trusts his magic, trusts it to recognize Alexander and keep him from harm, this time he can't.

#wip ask game #thanks for asking #foodsies rambles #foodsies writes #there are more dragon fics as well #but no snippets yet #just ideas #one with a captive Magnus from the circle #and a baby dragon Max #and then dragon Alec comes barging in and bonds immediately with Magnus #and may or may not eat a couple of circle members

[honey-tongued-devil]

↞[arcane preference] Love language↠

▶[Jayce, Viktor, Ekko, Marcus, Silco, Vander, Singed, Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Mel, Sevika] and their love language

[NdA]

Okay unbelievable, after saying for fifty times that I would return I have actually returned :D meanwhile, I don't know how tumblr works but I have exceeded 100 readers and I am very happy, especially because English is not my first language so I was really afraid to be attacked for mistakes made in the texts (besides the fact that I thought no one would read because my grammatical structures are complicated, my native language is a romance language) instead it seems to me that everything is going quite well, therefore to greater reason I am happy to propose you a couple of new things (besides to finally answer to the requests)

↠No use of "y/n", gender neutral reader (no pronouns for the reader) ↠TW: fluff?, Sfw, scars mention ↠Character/s: gn reader, Jayce, Viktor, Ekko, Marcus, Silco, Vander, Singed, Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Mel, Sevika

↠If you have any requests, ask the devil.↞

【Jayce】

Jayce has a habit of hugging.

Are you cooking? He will hug you from behind and leaning his head in the recess of your neck. Are you studying? His hands go straight to your hips to pull you closer to him.

nothing sexual, just the warmth of your body touching

He loves physical contact, which is why he looks for it whenever possible.

Another way to feel close to you is to caress your hair.

He wraps it around the fingers, braids it if it is long enough, combs it between the fingers, and moves the rebel tufts behind the ears.

in the mornings, when you have nothing to do, he likes to comb them and if possible style them.

【Viktor】

Viktor listens to whatever you say.

It doesn’t matter if you tell him about the day, the shopping bag that broke while you were walking down the street, your special interest, or even if you repeat something you already told him. He will listen.

This simple action also constitutes some moments of your intimacy: being able to talk about everything, voicing whatever you think, knowing that you are constantly being listened to.

Other times, however, there is a need for silence, and even in those moments nobody knows how to listen like him.

Sometimes the silence is louder than a scream.

Just stay together in the room, without a sound, without talking, without feeling embarrassment. Words can sometimes be equivocal.

And you two know how to enjoy the calm.

【Ekko】

Ekko’s always taking care of you.

it’s influenced by the environment in which he lives, where it is normal to get hurt and neglect the slightest wounds

returning from missions or work, he usually brings pieces of clean cotton and water in the room, so you can combine the moment of pampering to actually take care of you if you need it.

he kisses the scars as a ritual when you’re intimate, walking your body with his lips in a path that seems to want to help it heal completely.

he knows and loves every sign on your body, from the stupidest to the most painful ones and loves them all equally. It’s just stories you carry on your skin

like the time you overboarded and fell with your face on the iron gate and got that little scar on your forehead.

each sign tells a story that he would hear a thousand times.

【Marcus】

Marcus usually brings you flowers.

Is it a cheesy gesture? Yes. But it has become an indispensable habit.

on the kitchen table there is always a modest bunch of fresh flowers that make the environment more tender and give the room a fresh scent.

When you go out in the evening for events or a simple walk, he picks a flower from the bouquet and sticks it behind your ear: he knows which ones you love the most and he will make sure that they are always present.

And when it rains and he can’t pick the flowers he will make you find a tray of your favorite sweets

he is conscious that because of his work (and not only the legal one) he cannot be too present in the house but these small gestures serve to show you that not only he actually does care about you but that he listens to you and takes into account what you like

and if one night is on patrol, the flowers will remind you that he would never abandon you

【Silco】

Silco has a very special and specific and peculiar love language.

hands.

He casually strokes your hand with his thumb and leaves his hand at your disposal to distract you when you talk, if you need it.

he kisses the back of your hand to greet you

and in moments of maximum vulnerability rubs against it his carved cheek.

is always a delicate, light, compound contact, but that in itself retains all the tenderness that the underground can offer.

In public he appears detached, but if he perceives that you need him he brings an arm just behind the torso so that you can hold your little finger to his and feel his intimidating presence.

And those hands are ready to protect you at the cost of killing without the aid of weapons.

【Vander】

Vander loves to cook for you.

No matter what time he comes back home or how tired he is, he’ll always find time to put a hot meal on the table for you.

the smell of garlic has become almost pleasant: he often uses it in a delicate way, you don't even perceive it in dishes, but somehow his fingers are soaked with that strong aroma that you now recognize as "home smell"

when you want to spend time together and don’t know what to do, he proposes to cook together

it always ends up with dirty clothes and laughs.

and then, why not, you move two clumsy dance steps in the kitchen, humming under the voice a song out of tune

【Singed】

Singed is used to bring you small gifts from nature.

his work sees the use of chemical agents, but often it’s himself to extract them from plants or some weird ass poison glands, seeing the scientist in a… close contact with nature.

if you can say so.

when he comes across crystals or gems he does a quick job of soldering and makes you find small pendants as gifts.

But his absolute love language is sharing knowledge. 

He will explain to you what properties those stones have, the nature of the stabilized flower that now lies in a glass flask, which alkali contains, if it is poisonous how does it acts.

He’s dedicated his whole life to science, and there’s nothing in the world he loves more than to share that little world of his with you

【Jinx】

Jinx isn’t great with words.

sometimes she is afraid of not being able to express a concept well, which is why she begins to speak quickly and the words come out of her mouth like a confused river in flood.

which is why your life has become particularly... colorful. 

sticky notes. sticky notes everywhere. 

You’ll find some sticky notes on the mirror with hearts and compliments on them, on your bedroom door, on the sofa, on the refrigerator.

"Everywhere" means no place is safe. 

They are literally stuck on every single thing in the house, some contain messages, some simple drawings, but they don't fail make you huff a laugh.

You keep a pair of them in your wallet.

【Vi】

Vi doesn’t really know how to cook.

she would like her love language to be cooking (like her father), for her to actually dedicate herself to you

but it’s more of a continuous check of how you feel and what you need.

Have you eaten? and slept enough? Are you drinking?

It’s not totally her fault, it’s a bit of the ol’ “syndrome of the older sister”, and a bit of “the need to never waste energy when you are in the lanes: ask allows you to do in a targeted way what is needed”.

And then the protection.

Do you feel in danger? She accompanies you. Someone threatens you even jokingly? They’ll regret it immediately.

【Caitlyn】

Caitlyn hates the rules.

Her love language? To live.

She grew up in a disciplined environment, she’s used to being educated in a rigid way, but when it comes to showing love... Here she is sneaking out a window in the middle of the night, maybe clumsily, falling down.

It is not even a rebellion, it is more a “need to not live adapting life to the rules but adapt the rules to life”.

Whatever comes to mind you will do. The bath at night? clearly a bad idea, but why not. Dancing in front of the academy, with everyone’s eyes on? must try. Exotic foods? fuck yeah.

and to testify everything, her trusty instant camera.

You know she has a metal box in her room where she keeps your photos, receipts, candy wrappers and everything that serves as evidence of the little follies committed together.

【Sevika】

Sevika comes from an environment that makes her very emotionally constipated.

she is a strong and established woman, but the moment you are alone she needs that exact and specific contact: you have to sit on her thighs.

No matter if you eat, talk or watch a movie, she will pick you up while remaining serious.

It’s a vulnerability hard to explain, but being able to distract herself despite someone being so close to her vital organs is their ultimate way of expressing unconditional love and trust.

although undeniably sevika scolds. 

She doesn’t like you to catch, emulate or share her bad habits and try to keep you away from her work.

She just wants to protect you.

【Mel】

We could take five minutes and talk about Mel not being used to expressions of affection, but we won’t.

Her Love language? Gifts.

she makes you find them galore, especially after quarrels or more difficult periods.

always makes sure that you can have everything you could possibly want, making you aware that she listens to you when you are in the room,

gifting you things that you just mentioned you liked or were intrigued by.

Her other love language is to explain what is going on in her mind, even to speak openly about her political ideas.

She knows you won’t judge her, and talking about it openly helps her find the flaws in the plan, as well as showing you how much she loves you.

#jayce x reader #viktor x reader #ekko x reader #silco x reader #marcus x reader #vander x reader #singed x reader #jinx x reader #vi x reader #caitlyn x reader #sevika x reader #mel x reader #jayce talis #viktor arcane #ekko arcane #marcus arcane #silco arcane #arcane vander #singed #jinx #vi arcane #caitlyn kiramman #mel medarda #sevika #arcane x reader #arcane headcanon

[wanderersbell]

Hi can you write something for scara and his s/o growing old? Well scara can't age but his s/o can! I would prefer it to be kinda cute but also sad.

until death do us part

wanderer x gn!reader

genre: fluff, angst, hurt no comfort

warnings: major character death, very sad ending

word count: 2491

✧.* a/n: took me a while to get to this bc i kept crying thinking about it but here it is! i am so sorry in advance this is really sad, but enjoy!

nothing would make him regret getting to spend your life with you, not even the day he’d inevitably lose you. 

no amount of wishing or praying would stop you from returning to the soil of the earth one day and becoming nothing but another memory. the wanderer knew that eventually, he’d lose you too. just like everyone else he had once loved, you were no exception to the passages of time that sow life and death within the fate of humanity. 

the first time he met you, this thought passed through his mind in a fleeting whisper when your magnetic pull started to reel him in against his will. the soothing trill of your laughter and the kindness in your eyes reminded him so much of a time before pain was all he knew, that he could already picture the way the light would fade out of your eyes if he let his guard down and flew too close to the sun again. 

but no matter how hard he tried to avoid it, every path he went down lead him right back to you in the end. you who insisted with utmost sincerity that he come over for tea since he so graciously helped your grandpa harvest crops the other week. you who would pour him a cup, strong and bitter just the way he liked it, and sit across from him to tell all of the wild stories and legends you heard from the elders in town growing up, never bothered in the slightest when he didn’t have much to contribute to the conversation. 

you who slowly crept into every one of his thoughts until he could no longer fight the urge to see you, even though he truly did try to put up a fight. his feet would unconsciously bring him all the way to your doorstep after a long day, the only thing on his mind being the rush of warmth he gets whenever you look into his eyes and smile. 

he remembers when you’d open the door to the sight of him with tousled hair and dirt streaked on his skin and pull him inside without a second thought. he’d lean against your kitchen counter as you dabbed a soft damp cloth against his skin, your touch gentle but steady. you’d frown all the while as you cleaned him up, shushing and chastising him for never being careful. 

the wanderer was never actually hurt, and he could’ve easily dealt with the issue without so much as a scratch reaching him, but he loved the way you fussed over him. the stubborn crease between your brows, the jut of your lower lip, the brush of your featherlight fingertips—though nothing compared to the unfiltered and honest look of concern and worry in your eyes. 

It had been a long, long time since someone had looked at him in such a way. him, just as he was, with no purpose or usefulness to hide behind. a part of him felt annoyed by your insistence to care for him, and by the fact that he allowed you to perceive him as weak. but the other, louder part of him craved and so deeply desired the way you made him feel like he mattered.

and even still, you would never pry. you’d never pester him about why he would show up in such a state in the first place. in the months you had known him, he hadn’t told you anything. not even his name. you knew him only as a wanderer with no destination, and for this he was thankful. he was sure that if you know who he was, the things he had done, the lives he had taken—you would never look at him the same again. 

he made no move to hide anything about himself from you, but he also didn’t go out of his way to tell you either. if someone were to tell you, he would make no move to stop them. 

but nobody knew him. 

nobody until you. 

long ago the wanderer swore he would never find companionship again, but by the time he noticed the way he had grown attached to you, it was already too late to turn back. 

the existence of his past that had once felt like an eternity became nothing but a ghost in the back of his mind as you became a part of his present. he should’ve known he was in too deep the day he finally agreed to start taking you with him on his travels, but he was too distracted by the hope and excitement on your face as you proposed the idea to him. 

he knew it was risky. you couldn’t fight, didn’t know how to lie with a straight face, and refused to butcher and eat an animal even if it meant life or death; but he didn’t have it in himself to say no to you. you, who truly had no bad intentions or motives. you, who listened to every word he had to say with an open mind and no judgment in your heart. you, who reminded him why he had once been so fond of humans. 

how foolish he was, to get caught up in the fragile web of a mortal life again. but there was no stopping when he started falling for you. 

the first time he had ever snapped at you, raised his voice and said cruel things born from the anguish in his chest, you barely reacted. even as insults left his lips and he told you to get lost, you gazed at him with steady, understanding eyes and waited until he ran out of hurtful things to say. 

as his chest heaved with anger and his fingernails dig into his palms where they were clenched into fists, you waited patiently. when he came back to himself and saw the wetness of unshed tears in your eyes, the guilt and regret that followed nearly knocked him off of his feet. 

it was cowardly of him, but in that moment all he could do was turn on his foot and flee. he couldn’t bear to see that look on your face, knowing it was all his own doing. he spent until the sun began to set dragging his feet around, picturing the way you would regard him like the monster he was from this point onward. 

when he returned to you, he expected to find you upset and disgusted with him. but instead, when he tentatively stepped into your home, he found you sitting half asleep at your kitchen table with a pot of his favorite tea that had long gone cold waiting for him. 

you sat up quickly when you saw him cross the threshold, suddenly alert and awake. he could tell you were hesitant to say something, unsure of what state of mind the wanderer might be in right then, so he put extra effort into moving calmly as he approached the table and sat down as not to scare you. 

that night, he told you everything. you held his hands tightly between yours and listened from beginning to end, letting him retell the devastating tale of the life he’d lived as a heartless puppet. you cried for him. you told him how sorry you were that he had to experience all of that, how sad you were that it’d been so long since he’d felt wanted. you accepted him, his sins, his selfishness and greed. 

no matter how far he jumped, you always met him halfway. he was undeniably, pathetically in love with you. 

eventually, almost like it was always meant to happen, the two of you fell into each others arms as seamlessly as a stream flows. it had been a little over a year since the day he met you that you leaned in and kissed him for the first time. the wanderer was only shocked for a moment before he melted into it and realized that there was nothing more he wanted in this world than to be with you. 

he was happy, happier than he could remember being in centuries. there was nothing he had to hide around you, nobody he had to pretend to be that he wasn’t. it was as easy as ever to fall into a natural rhythm with you, wandering around teyvat and experiencing everything together. even the things he had already done before felt new and memorable with you. 

everywhere you went, it was together. the wanderer had been given a chance to see the world through a clear lens again, though it had become rose tinted over time from the intensity of your affection. 

the many sights he saw with you were indescribable, but his eyes always returned to you no matter how breathtaking it was. home was wherever you were, and so the two of you found home everywhere.  

but there came a day when he was forced to face reality yet again. many years passed by your side, and even though it was only a short amount of time to him, it was a huge chunk of your lifetime. when your skin began to show wrinkles and people began to mistake him for your son, the terrifying thought crossed his mind. 

you wouldn’t be around forever, your time was running out, and it rooted a deep seed of dread into his chest that threatened to bloom into something worse. it dug up old feelings that the wanderer hadn’t felt in years, ones that gripped their icy claws into his head until they were impossible to ignore. 

just like everyone else, you would leave him too. 

why? why did he only find happiness and belonging in the things that wouldn’t last? he didn’t want to be alone again. it was unfair, and never more than in that moment had he longed to be a normal human. 

did it bother you that he would never be able to grow old with you? that people would assume him your grandson and pass judgment if they knew the truth? things would soon begin to grow complicated and people who had known you both would notice that he didn’t age. 

you knew this as well as he did, and after a long and painful conversation about it, you insisted it didn’t bother you and made him promise to move forward even when you were gone. you knew he was afraid and that he had already lost so much, that there was a huge possibility that he would lose himself when you left. you feared that he had become too reliant on you. 

that in itself was what had him making an oath to himself that he wouldn’t let you leave this world feeling worried about him. and he didn’t have it in him to break a promise to you. 

when walking up steps became a difficult task for you, he’d wrap an arm around you and help you make it to the top. when you got worn out more easily and couldn’t keep up with traveling around anymore, he suggested the two of you finally settle down and return to your old house. 

as you grew weaker every year and had to rely on him more, the wanderer never once complained or treated it like an inconvenience. he was there for you, just as he had promised he always would be. you never stopped being beautiful in his eyes, even when your hair turned gray and your joints achy. you still had the same sweet smile, the same captivating eyes, the same comforting smell. you were still you, and you were his. 

eventually, when your skin had become pale and sallow and your hands too shaky and weak to hold anything, you had slowly reached up and brushed his hair out of his eyes with a sad smile. 

“i will come back to you,” you promised weakly, eyes focusing and unfocusing on his face. “no matter how many times, no matter what form i take, my soul will always return to you.”

even as his heart got caught in his throat and tears spilled over his cheeks, the wanderer nodded weakly at your words. 

“okay.”

during your final days, it took everything in him to hold it together. he spoon fed you as often as you’d let him, breath hitching every time you struggled to swallow. he stayed by your side and held your frail hands in his steady ones, planting soft kisses against your knuckles and whispering his love for you into your skin. 

by the final evening, he wasn’t even sure if you could hear him anymore. still, he laid next to you the bed you shared and retold the old stories he remembers from the very beginning of your time together. it was hard to talk without breaking down when he knew you wouldn’t respond. only the sound of your shallow breathing filled the silence, growing slower and slower by the hour. 

losing you was something he had long since been preparing for, but was never truly ready to experience. he had felt grief many times in the past, but it had never hurt this deeply. it was like a sheet of anguish clinging to him, weighing him down and piercing him with nails. 

quiet, lonely, and cold, there was a giant gaping hole in his chest that you had once filled. a void that your existence managed to soothe, but it was there again. loud, unforgiving, and so, so unbearably painful. 

he cried more than he ever thought himself capable of in the weeks that followed. everywhere he looked, he could only see where you should’ve been. the wind was lonely without the sound of your voice, and the sky dull. maybe it was just his imagination, but even the birds and bugs seemed less lively without you. 

there was a suffocating stillness clouding his perception of reality. he didn’t want to acknowledge that time was passing without you, or that he would never feel your warmth next to him anymore, but he knew you were gone. there was nothing he could do. 

it hurt. it hurt so badly that he could still hear his own guttural sobs even over the deafening downpour of rain as it soaked him to the bone where he sat hunched over in front of where you had been buried not long before. 

he missed you so much. even though he had gone so long being alone before he met you, it was as if he was experiencing it all for the first time again. his lungs burned and his chest ached as he choked on humid air, wishing you were still there to comfort him like you always had been.  

“please,” he called softly into the wind, willing himself to hold on to even the smallest shard of hope. “keep your promise.”

there was no response. 

he was alone again. 

#yaepublishinghouse #requests! ପ(๑•ᴗ•๑)ଓ ♡ #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #wanderer #wanderer x reader #scaramouche #scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi #kunikuzushi x reader #my writing

[ladybellissima]

Finding Love Katakuri x Reader Part 11

The cold and fresh air of the sea felt like heaven. (Y/N) sighed in delight, while she automatically snuggled closer into Katakuri's chest. Feeling his strong arms wrapped around her small form to carry her bridal style, let her feel safe and secure. And that was exactly, what she needed now, after this nightmare and she was relieved and more than happy, that he accepted her closeness without a problem. It was so out of character of him, acting so gentle and made her butterflies in her stomach jump of joy.

Stepping onto his ship, he reached his office and put her on a bed. Grabbing a blanket he covered her body in silence. (Y/N) could see his pained and angered expression, because of her wounds. Hesitating first, but deciding to give it a try, she slowly grabbed his balled fist to calm his nerves. His look met her smiling one, which let his anger towards these bandits raise.

"Katakuri… It's okay… I am here now and safe.", she spoke in this lovingly tone, he longed to hear ever so often.

"Yeah now, but you could have been dead, raped or who knows what they planned to do with you. And I wasn't there. The whole time I wasn't there, while my wife had to suffer so much. As your husband I should have been there to stop them..it took me so long, too long to get you.", he spoke annoyed and avoid (Y/N) 's surprised look. She wasn't prepared to get so much words out of him, but it made it much easier to understand him.

" The whole time he was worried sick about me… In a way I feel ashamed that I doubted that he would safe me.. ", she thought and smiled weakly.

"But you came and that's what counts. And the other thing. Nothing happened, they didn't touch me in that way. Or better I didn't let them..", the image of her abuser let her shiver slightly, not to be unnoticed by her husband.

"and what do you call that?", he spoke ice cold and pulled up her blanket to show her bruised body. Biting her lip she fell silent again and just wanted to forget this horrible experience. Grabbing the blanket from his hands, she covered her body and laid down to rest. Katakuri cursed under his breath to sound too rough. Sadly he watched (Y/N) turning away from him and thought about what to do.

"Katakuri… You know, it still hurts how you treated me.. ", she whispered and could feel tears in her eyes again. He knew that he messed up badly and an apology alone wouldn't fix it in the slightest. Sighing he looked up to the ceiling and collected his thoughts.

" What is she doing to me… She always gets me out of my comfort zone. Pushing me over the line.", he thought and watched her beautiful form lovingly. Katakuri worked really hard to keep his image of being the loyal, brave general of the big mom pirates. He was admired by his siblings and townsfolk to always know an answer, to always win and protect everyone. He hid his worries and insecurities behind his scarf and locked his feelings away to focus on his duties and others. But (Y/N) turned his world up side down. There was someone now caring for him. And for the first time he didn't know what to do.

"The day I asked you to come with me to the tea party was one of the happiest days of my life and at the same time the hardest for me. ", he spoke uneasy. (Y/N) listened surprised and snuggled deeper into his leather jacket, which she still had around her body.

"I wanted to show you that I care for you. That I am grateful for your hard work of baking doughnuts everyday. Good they are amazing…", he sighed in delight and forgot for a moment that he wasn't alone. Flustered of her sweet chuckling he coughed to get back to his speaking.

" But then I realized how others look at you. How quickly they want to have your attention and push you to do things you don't want.", he explained angered and thought back to the grabbing bastard of sweet city.

"nobody is allowed to touch what is mine.", he blurted out in anger and stopped embarrassed. (Y/N)'s eyes widened and she dared to look at him, while blushing madly as well.

"Go on..", she stuttered and smiled.

"Yeah.. Sorry.. I was so angry… So full of hatred and after Pudding left with you I had to give them a lesson. That' s how I do things. Since I was a child. And in the middle of punishment, out of all people you entered the scene. I didn't want that you see this sight of me. Your look alone how scared you were because of me…it hurt too. ", he spoke and let her gasp of shock. Quickly hiding back into her safe vest she felt her heart race. Never did she believe that she hurted his feelings too. A man like him, which she thought was too tough to even smile.

"Katakuri you got it wrong. I was shocked of the mass of blood. Of the way they had to die. I felt regret, that I was standing at this shop window, because if I didn't they wouldn't have been killed.", she stunned him with her words.

"You are always so kind hearted, even to bad people….bad people like me… ", he thought bitterly.

"Yeah at first I was unsure of what kind of man you are and that made me scared. Your tall and strong gaze gave me goosebumps. But at whole cake chataeu I wasn't scared of you of how you looked. It was your uncontrolled temper. The way you shout at me, without giving me a chance..believe it or not. I knew deep inside that you wouldn't hurt me physically ever since you gave me your room. On the other side after your acting and your mother's offer to punish me, I wasn't sure anymore what is going to happen. I know how loyal you are.. Nevertheless I still believe that you wouldn't hurt me.", she told him and felt relieved to finally speak freely to him. Katakuri was surprised about her words. He looked like a terrifying killer. His clothes were full of blood and still she wasn't afraid of him? .

" Emotionally I got you good… ", he added and got a heavy sigh as answer.

"and as cherry on the top, Pudding brought you late to the party and into more trouble than before.", he spoke and couldn't believe it himself how messed up this day was.

"I feared that Mama would take your lifespan. And being close to her in the middle of her hunger pangs is the most stupid thing you had done. There was a reason why I brought you out of the danger zone. I couldn't focus on you at that time. I had to look after my siblings and what Mama was doing.", he sighed deeply and knew what she would say now.

" I wanted to help you."

There it was. He pinched his nose exhausted.

" It was too dangerous and you should know how strong I am. You don't have to help me (Y/N). I wanted to protect you and you got yourself and others who were focused on you in danger. ", he explained seriously. (Y/N) 's eyes widened of his words. She didn't see it in that way. He was right. With her reckless act someone could have been hurt, because of her.

" I am sorry… I was worried about you. And I felt responsible for mentioning the doughnuts."

"You don't have to. Normally we have from all desserts two extras hidden, but Anana ate them. God knows why she had such an appetite at that day. The head cook would have made some. Only some time later..", he spoke shortly and (Y/N) nodded deep in thought. Turning to his side their eyes met and no one spoke a word. Silence engulfed them for a moment, but (Y/N) knew she had to get to that point where he broke her heart.

" Did you mean it? As you shouted down at me that I am below you… That I have to shut my mouth and obey? Is it that what you want? I am that shameful to you? ", she asked, while he avoided her sad gaze ashamed.

"I know I escalated…"

"Escelated ? You even broke my table."

"I know. I have to add it was an old one."

"You made me feel like I am not worth of being your wife or worth being anything at all. That you hate me.."

"I know (Y/N)…. I know…", he cut her off.

"I…i don't think any of these things I had said. It was out of anger towards your stubbornness to not listen to me and that I couldn't protect you. I was worried about you. The whole time I was worried….I.. I am glad that you are my wife… ", he spoke nervously. She watched Katakuri in silence to let his words sink in. Crossing his arms and looking emotionless like always he observed her form with an intense gaze.

"I understand…", (Y/N) finally spoke and turned to her back to watch the ceiling.

"What do you mean by that?", Katakuri asked worried that she maybe would give up on him or avoiding him from now on. He even was embarrassing himself.

"I will listen to you more and most of all trust you more from now on. I am sorry that I made you feel this way. I should believe in you more…I accept your apology. "

Katakuri's eyes widened of her words.

"But.."

Nervous he was met with her serious gaze, which gave him goosebumps of excitement. He found this look quite attractive.

"Promise me that you will trust me too and that we work on speaking more together. You could only trust someone close.", she spoke and gave him a shy look.

"I often tried to make a step and become friends with you and get to know you more, but it was really hard. I know it's difficult for us. We didn't know each other and got married, but I think we could get along well. We just need time.. Wouldn't it work better, if we work together more? And If I do anything wrong, just speak to me…explain what I have to do to fit into your family…..", she added and Katakuri nodded surprised that she still wanted to get along with his mother, even if she was like that. It showed him that she cares for him and his family, which gave him a sweet warmth inside his chest. For him it was the most important thing that she fitted into his life. And that meant getting along with his mother and siblings. On the other side, it hurted to be called a friend, but after everything that happened he was grateful that (Y/N) gave him another chance. She was his wife and he had to gain her trust and love, if he really wanted her heart. And hell he wanted to, with everything he got.  (Y/N) also didn't want to push her luck. She was happy to get that far with Katakuri. To start from the beginning would be better than getting too far.

"I will (Y/N)."

"no shouting. I mean speak."

"Yeah I got it right…", he chuckled for the first time and surprised her.

"You should laugh more often. It's nice…", she spoke and got Katakuri speechless. Thank God he wore his scarf, because the heat in his cheeks made him a red tomato. Seeing his embarrassed state she quickly changed the topic to help him out.

" How much time passed since I left?" she asked, while snuggling into his leather vest again. Blushing slightly of her sweet act, Katakuri got up to get some medical supplies from his desk.

"2 days…"

Nodding exhausted she closed her eyes for a moment to ease the starting pain in her body.

"What did your mother say? I wasn't allowed to ever leave your place.. She must be furious… " It gave her goosebumps to think how angry she must be for what happened.

"she doesn't know…", he grumbled stressed, looking for some bandages. Surprised she opened her eyes to look at him. "and her doughnuts? She must be suspicious by now why I didn't deliver them."

Sighing he got to her side again and laid the bandages beside him. "Oven helped me out and delivered the doughnuts you had made before they got you. So don't worry. Everything is fine.", he explained and looked up to his wife, who just nodded relieved.

"Thank god I finished them before..", she sighed in relief.

"Thank you for mine too… I got your message. Honestly I didn't think you would ever make me doughnuts ever again…", he whispered nervously.

Flustered she gave him a smile. "I couldn't resist…", she spoke exhausted and her eyes closed. It was really a hard day.

"(Y/N)?"

Watching her sleeping form cuddled up in his vest, he wished to just lay beside her. Slowly he brushed some strainds of hair out of her face and admired her beautiful face. Still he couldn't believe that he was married with her. And still he was fighting with his inner self how to ever be able to touch her the way he wished. He liked their talk a lot. He was able to speak freely without any worries. Something he never did with someone. He always showed others his strict and loyal side to not disappoint his family. With her, everything was different. He was different. He was showing his true self.

Pulling her blanket off slowly, he took a wet cloth and hesitated. Blushing madly he realized what he was gonna to do. "(Y/N)?", he stuttered nervously and looked if she would awaken, but nothing happened. His gaze wandered from her slender legs to her delicate hips and chest, which were luckily covered by her torned dress and his jacket.

"Okay… Just the legs..", he stuttered and softly he cleaned her skin from the dirt to treat her wounds.

"katakuri…", she whimpered in her sleep, a nightmare was starting to haunt her mind. Brushing her cheek he tried to calm her down. "I am here… I protect you (Y/N)..", he whispered and realized how much he loved saying those words to her and how much he loved to touch her. This sensation he felt inside was a feeling of pure joy. Greater than ever doughnut. Sighing in delight, she breathed normally again.

"Master Katakuri? We are back and have the fruit you ordered us to get. ", a servant's voice appeared by his door and let him stop in his tracks. Getting up and taking the rare fruit, he smiled relieved.

"Good. Now we head back."

"Where you belong (Y/N)"

#romance #fanfiction #karakuricharlotte #katakuri x reader #one piece

[a-crumb-of-whump]

Okay, so I finally got around to all the responses given for the Random Whump Questions google form I made! Everything is ranked from highest to lowest in terms of what was picked, and the number beside them is how many people chose that option:)

Also, to make sure it's not longer than it needs to be, I'm going to do the open ended questions in a separate post:) Let me know if you'd like to be tagged for that!

One more thing to keep in mind. The 'custom answers' section is where only one person has brought it up. If multiple people have said the same thing, then it will be included in the main answers :)

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Question 1. When did you first discover whump as a term?

A. 15 - 17 (106) B. 11 - 14 (105) C. 20 - 25 (42) D. 18 - 19 (39) E. 26 - 30 (21) F. -10 (4) G. 36 - 39 (4) H. 31 - 35 (3)

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Question 2.

A. Absolutely not (135) B. Some of them do but I prefer to keep it to myself (127) C. I don't try to hide it but not many people know anyway (42) D. Most, if not all of them know - I'm very open about it (10) E. One person knows (4) F. Friends know, family don't (2)

Custom answers: I'm not secretive but I don't explain it because it's hard to, I've never said it but you only need to look at me to know.

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Question 4. Biggest pet peeve when it comes to whump in media?

A. Whumpee miraculously recovers as if they didn't just break three vital bones in their body and get stabbed by the enemy (204) B. Skipping over it and going straight to recovery (165) C. Changes POV's right as it's getting juicy (154) D. Whumpee is too stoic and unphased by what happened (130) E. Too comedic/lighthearted (128) F. Main character(s) die rather than living with what they've done/what happened (127) G. Too much comfort and not enough hurt (80) H. The recovery/captivity is far too unrealistic (77) I. Too much hurt and not enough comfort (62) J. Whumpee is a massive wuss (56) K. All of the above (23) L. The recovery/captivity is too realistic (20) M. Too heavy/serious (16) N. Whumpee is unattractive/not cute enough to me (2) O. Wrong characters are whumped/favourite characters are ignored (2)

Custom written: Obvious medical errors, turns out it was all "just a nightmare!", Caretaker's wellbeing is ignored, Whumpee is rescued right before the whump was about to start, Caretaker never figures out what happened and it's never brought up again, no women, never goes as badly as I want, not enough from Whumpee's POV.

Custom written #2: Whumpee is infantilised during their recovery, no trauma/trauma is overlooked, aftermath/recovery is ignored by a timeskip, Whumpee has no personality apart from being the one who deserves pity for being white and pretty and sweet, caretaker saves the day and it's never brought up again.

Custom written #3: Caretaker saves the day and Whumpee is the perfect victim and there's no conflict ever again, too much emphasis on physical pain rather than emotional, whumper wants love from their whumpees, recovery is too fast and it involves sexual/romantic stuff.

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Question 5. Best thing a whumpee can say to give you whumperflies?

A. "Please- please, no more." (146) B. "It hurts." (142) C. "Please don't leave me." (109) D. "Don't hurt them." (94) E. "Get the hell away from me." (85) F. "I just want to be good." (81) G. "You promised." (71) H. "Am I not enough?" (69) I. "I thought... I thought it was over." (50) J. "You came back!" (49) K. "I was so scared." (43) L. "You will not break me." (36) M. All of the above (19) N. Description over dialogue/I prefer whumpees that are too scared to talk (6) O. Begging (2) P. "I'm fine." (2) Q. "I can't take it anymore." (2)

Custom answers: "Go away" | "It's all my fault, I'm sorry" | "don't touch me!" | "I'm sorry, I won't do it again, I promise" | "don't look at me" | "I don't want you to see me like this" | "fuck you" | just a heartbroken "why?" | "it's fine!"

Custom answers #2: "Nobody is coming..." | "i'm not the same person I was before" | "is this real?" | "I don't want to die" | "why are you helping me?" | Repeating "i'm okay" to themselves while trying not to cry.

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Question 7. Best thing a whumper can say to give you whumperflies?

A. "I wonder how long it'll take to break you." (120) B. "Surely you can take a little more than that, can't you?" (111) C. "Tell me what I need to know and it'll all be over." (111) D. "You're being so good." (107) E. "You're so adorable when you cry." (98) F. "You're mine." (79) G. "Which finger should I crush this time?" (78) H. "I think if you were really sorry, you'd __" (63) I. "This is your home now." (57) J. "At least try to show a little enthusiasm." (49) K. "Please forgive me." (47) L. "You live to please me." (41) M. All of the above (15) N. Prefer no whumpers (7) O. Silent whumpers (3)

Custom answers: "Everything you touch dies." | "I have your whumpee." | "You wanna see something weird/interesting/cool?" | "Get some rest, darling. We'll pick this up again tomorrow." | "Just what do you think you're doing?" | "Don't worry. I'll take good care of you."

Custom answers #2: Petnames | "It's not personal." | "Nobody's coming for you. Give up." | "This is all your fault." | "You shouldn't have done that, darling." | "You'll be begging soon." | "Maybe some pain/time out/etc. will change your mind." | "It's you or them." | "Go ahead, try to run."

Custom answers #3: "Do it or I'll hurt them." | "This is for your own good." | "This will only hurt a pinch." | "Why do you have to ruin everything?" | "The more you scream, the more I have to hurt you." | "It's for science, Whumpee." | "I truly am sorry about this." | "I love you so, so much. I want to taste you..." | "Good boy."

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Question 8. Best thing a Caretaker can say to give you whumperflies?

A. "I got you." (180) B. "Breathe. Just breathe." (170) C. "What did they do to you." (154) D. "Hey, I'm here, okay?" (152) E. "Lie down, okay?" (107) F. "I'm gonna get us out of here." (107) G. "When was the last time they fed you?" (97) H. "Lay a hand on them and see what happens." (88) I. "Don't hurt them." (83) J. "I'm sorry but this is in your best interest." (66) K. "I will not rest until I find who did this." (41) L. "Don't cry." (32) M. All of the above (26) N. Any sort of medical talk (2) O. No caretakers (2)

Custom answers: "Don't touch them!" | Pet names in general | "Just relax. It's all over." | "Don't fucking touch them." | "It's not your fault." | "Hold still" while tending to wounds | "Almost done | Just hold on." | "Hey... not so fast." | "Just look at me, okay?" and then proceeds to gently explain what the medical procedure entails | "You're safe now." | "Please believe me?"

Custom answers #2: "May I see? I promise I won't hurt you." | "Whoa, hey, calm down. I'm not gonna hurt you." | "Shh, you're safe now. It's okay. I'm not leaving." | "Who did this to you?" | "Take this, you'll feel better." | "Shh, I know it hurts" to a squirming whumpee | Anything as long as there's physical touch to go with it | "Stay with me, okay?" | "You need to stay awake for me." | "Leave them alone!"

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Question 9. What role do you think you'd play in a whump story?

A. Whumpee (87) B. Caretaker (52) C. Side character (44) D. Caretaker-turned-whumpee (32) E. Whumpee-turned-caretaker (22) F. Whumper (16) G. Whumpee-turned-whumper (14) H. Whumper-turned-whumpee (11) I. Whumper-turned-caretaker (10) J. Caretaker-turned-whumper (8) K. Caretaker or whumpee (6) L. Carewhumper (3) M. None/I don't insert myself into scenarios (2)

Custom answers: Narrator, all of the above depending on my mood, side character.

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Question 11. Favourite place to consume whump? (not including movies/tv shows/games/etc)

A. Tumblr (294) B. AO3 (212) C. Pinterest (62) D. Fanfiction.net (23) E. DeviantArt (8) F. Wattpad (4) G. My brain (4) H. All of the above (3) I. Youtube (3) J. Character.AI (2) K. Discord (2) L. My brain (2) M. Twitter (2)

Custom answers: Sketch book, google,

Other notes: Someone also gave @whumplovers-collaborate a mention, saying they've been on that server for over a year and that it's amazing.

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Question 12. Pick a whumpy anime out of the ones I've watched (so far)

A. Castlevania (51) B. Black Butler (43) C. Bungou Stray Dogs (43) D. Banana Fish (35) E. Vanitas No Carte (19) F. Black Bullet (5)

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Question 14. How old does a whumpee need to be to be considered an "older whumpee"?

A. 40+ (127) B. 34 - 37 (68) C. 30 - 33 (51) D. 38 - 39 (38) E. 26 - 29 (18) F. 22 - 25 (2) G. 18 - 21 (0)

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Question 15. Pick a character that I think needs to be whumped more.

A. Link (The Legend Of Zelda) (96) B. Tony Stark (The Avengers/Iron Man) (64) C. Vanitas & Noe (Vanitas No Carte) (47) D. Joel Miller (The Last Of Us) (45) E. Hosea Matthews (Red Dead Redemption 2) (5)

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Question 16. Do you prefer hystorical whump or modern whump?

A. Modern (220) B. Hystorical (82)

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Question 17. Do you prefer hurt or comfort?

A. A healthy combination of both (163) B. A little bit of comfort, lots of hurt (81) C. Hurt (44) D. A little hurt, lots of comfort (28) E. Comfort (8)

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Question 19. Favourite species to whump?

A. Human (290) B. Immortal (118) C. Vampire (105) D. Demon/angel (87) E. Werewolf (57) F. Robot/android/cyborg (54) G. God/deity (49) H. Birdpeople (48) I. Merfolk (44) J. Tiny (38) K. Catpeople (26) L. Alien (19) M. All (16) N. Humans with inhuman/magical abilities (5) O. Giant (2) P. Elf (2) Q. Lab subjects (2) R. Species isn't important (2)

Custom answers: Shapeshifter, hybrics, faefolk, winged whumpees, dhampir, superheros, dwarves, mobian.

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Question 20. Pick something to restrain your whumpee with.

A. Chains (104) B. Rope (101) C. Handcuffs (38) D. Zipties (31) E. Your belt (18) F. A piece of their own clothing (18) G. Your tie (6)

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Question 22: Your whumpee bites you. What do you do?

A. Put a muzzle on them. You're not mad, but you need to keep yourself safe (119) B. Beat them until they learn their lesson (82) C. Have a rational conversation with them once they've calmed down about why it's wrong and how to stop it from happening again (61) D. Get checked for some kind of desease. Who knows what they've been carrying (25) E. Ignore it and hope it doesn't happen again (8)

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Question 23. A whumpee shows up at your door, terrified and scared. They beg for your help. What do you do?

A. Let them in and give them some food. You can worry about what you're gonna do with them later on (273) B. Keep them prisoner. Whump their to your heart's content (31) C. Slam the door in their face (4)

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Taglist: @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @let-the-whump-commence @pigeonwhumps @rule-masochism @whumperofworlds @whump-space @wollemi-whump

#whump #whump stuff #whumpblr #whumblr #whump things

[john-macnamara]

Howdy folks! It took a minute, but we’re back and better than ever. And what’s a better way to celebrate our return than with one of PEIP’s biggest secrets? They like to act all high and mighty. A truly “good” secret organization. But one specific incident from ‘05 disproves that. The same incident that led to the creation of Uncle Wiley. The same incident that sent their current general down a path of self-destruction and instability. We present to you, The Portal Incident. And we’re pinning it too!

Oct. 30, 2005. PEIP HQ. Mission Report.

6:35 AM: Portal testing complete. All works as intended. Still no signal from communications devices. Final preparations for Maj. MacNamara’s entrance are beginning. 

11:07 AM: Final preparations complete. Ready to begin entrance into the Black and White.

11:37 AM: Unfortunately, Maj. MacNamara is not psychologically sound. He began exhibiting signs of anxiety at approximately 11:10 AM, and rapidly progressed into full blown panic within minutes. He seemed to wear himself out, and was prepared to continue the mission, and then promptly fell unconscious. He appears to have cracked his skull. Is in med bay for further treatment. We will find a replacement and continue tomorrow.

Oct. 31, 2005. PEIP HQ. Mission Report.

8:43 AM: We have managed to find a replacement. Col. Wilbur Cross offered himself for the experiment. We were hesitant, but he was the best option. Unfortunately, Cross is significantly less expendable than MacNamara, so we will work to ensure he comes back.

3:54 PM: We have completed as much safety training as possible. As is known, the mission did not plan for MacNamara’s recovery from the Black and White, so this is a rapid change of plans. We believe it will work, though.

7:06 PM: Cross has entered the portal. He shows signs of life and is keeping contact with us. Will send updates once an hour.

8:06 PM: Recording devices have been planted. Signal is strong. Mission successful.

9:06 PM: No updates from Colonel Cross. We are radioing to him now.

10:06 PM: Nothing. Signal has been lost.

11:06 PM: Portal has shut down. Colonel Cross has been filed as MIA. Nobody may know about this.

12:06 AM, Nov. 1: Cover story complete, witnesses are being drilled on this. Cross went missing on Oct. 20 (the last day anyone outside of PEIP saw him) and we spent days looking for him. We were given a ransom note stating that he was dead. Lt. Colonel Schaffer will inform his family. As was said above, no one may know what happened.

Feb. 14, 2006. PEIP HQ. Incident Report.

At 9:42 AM, the portal activated with no input. Agents, including Maj. MacNamara, went to investigate. No signs of break-in or illegal entry were found.

Three hours later, after the search had been completed, the portal surged. Col. Wilbur Cross emerged. He was slumped over himself and appeared to be in pain, calling for help. Maj. MacNamara approached him first, and was allowed to touch Cross. However, when a medic appeared to assist him, Cross slit her throat.

He began to laugh as he approached the remaining agents. Three were killed, and all except for MacNamara were injured to some degree. Quote: “Come on, John! It’s happy there! I have a fwendy-wend who you’d love to meet! He has a spot saved for you right next to me! We could be together! Fix this broken world! All you have to do is come with me!”

These were quickly dismissed as the ramblings of a madman. MacNamara was given the order to eliminate Cross, but failed. He escaped.

Due to the nature of Cross and MacNamara’s previous relationship, MacNamara being the only one to remain unharmed, and his failure to eliminate the threat, Johnathan S. MacNamara is suspect for working with eldritch forces against the good of humanity. We will investigate this further. As of tomorrow, he will be interrogated with whatever force necessary. Records will be provided in a separate file.

#hatchetfield rp #hatchetblr #PEIP leaks #it’s a biggon yall

[an---anonymous]

Hiii i am new writer so please don't be so harshhh.

It is trailer like thing lol.

A tiring day on a base. Task force 141 was getting ready and more chaotic. It was hard to do it. Everyone was staring at computer screen in horror, sunshine was falling on a screen of computer so it was hard to completely see what was shown, but listening to is was enought. A words, and a painfull one. Russia has officially started world war 3. Makarov was leader of it of course. It felt like makarovs cold eyes stared down everybody from screen. His big smirk while anouncing ww3 was priceless. Ghost felt frozen for the first time. His dark brown eyes widen, he felt like he could not breath, mask stuck uncomfortably on his sweatly face. Soaps hands shaken, he let out a loud gasp and stubled back in horror. Gaz was trembling along with price. Sebastian was watching it all. His eyes only widen.

Why so soon

Said sebastian to himself. Even the whisper he let out was too loud for a room where people were trembling in. And it all went out like it.

----------------------------------------------------------

Ghost: please sebastian

Ghost let out a sob as tears streamed down his face

Ghost: please don't do it. Don't leave me

----------------------------------------------------------

A loud thunder echod to the sky. Rain has been falling down like sebastians tears. Sebastian looked around with widen eyes. His team. They have fallen. He held vex's lifeless body in his arms and let out bloody, pained scream. Birds fly away at the sound of it.

No vex p-please

Let out sebastian quiet sob as he was caressing vex's lifeless face which was covered in blood

----------------------------------------------------------

Presiden has been killed. Who is gonna save is now

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It was night when ghost was walking down the street. He saw him. Sebastian. and froze.

S-seb

Ghost let out quiet whisper. Sebastian has changed. His face looked pale, eyes bloody cold, dull and emotionless, eyebags under them. Sebastian did not even looked ghost and walked past him.

Traitor

Sebastian whispered and walked off

----------------------------------------------------------

Ghost sat on a couch, her arm touching his. He felt happy with her but the sting of hurt and guilty still was like a rock on his heart.

----------------------------------------------------------

Ghost was sat with her. They were happy for once but somewhere in the forest. In a fog. Lifeless bodies of soldiers that have fall. Dead bodys everywhere. And near a tree was somebody leaning on it. He looked down at his arm, blood leaking of it. His waist hurtingz there was knife stuck in it. He let out a loud roar as he took that knife out of himself.

----------------------------------------------------------

G-ghost

He mumbled painly as he closed his eyes as tear fall from it. Bloody tear. Tear of regret and love

----------------------------------------------------------

Somewhere far where not even wind blows. Somewhere where nobody hears your cries. Rested body of a dead man with quiet tear on his cheek.

----------------------------------------------------------

A loud base, with loud experiment room. Doctor is discussing things with rather tall two eye colour man.

It is impossible to wake him up

Do it or you will face consequences

Was heard cold voice.

----------------------------------------------------------

They did it they succed and only now was starting real war

----------------------------------------------------------

My soldiers

Said tall man to his army.

We will concure the world today. For our home for our families

The man keep talking.

At the end army bow him down. The leader well known. Army thst no one has ever seen and a pain on the road that was comming withing. Fear consuming everybody, nights were full of it but somewhere in a laboratory body laid within

----------------------------------------------------------

He was dead and yet alive. Too lost in pain and numbness. Was it really worth it.

----------------------------------------------------------

It happes yea. One calls other traitor and that one becames him

----------------------------------------------------------

Moving Chains loud sound echod in a closed room.

He has woken up

Whispered one rather tall doctor. He did woke up, but he was another now. He was only flesh left and mind was dead on a row. His eyes no longer green. Bloody eyes stared at doctor, animalistic gaze. He roared in a agony wished to be free.

----------------------------------------------------------

And in the end he died in his arms. And he closed his eyes. He looked down dead one and felt tear comming. Tear fell down on dead ones cheek, it was like a moment when he first died. It was smae foggy forest, it was same cold breeze. Leaning on a tree surounded by corps.

----------------------------------------------------------

It was always like it. And he looked at his wife, aith somebody else as pain sting in his heart. Was it really worth it? Or was he cursed? but in all and entire it was for lost

#cod mw2 #task force 141 #male reader #task force 141 x reader #traitor #ghost #cod oneshots #cod makarov #female reader #angst

[toboldlygohome]

"Please..."

Mark Watney X Reader

Summary: Nothing could have prepared you for the pain of losing your boyfriend on Sol 6. But you were even less prepared to find out that he didn't die. You left him there. Alone.

Character(s): Mark Watney, Beth Johanssen, Chris Beck, Melissa Lewis, Alex Vogel, Rick Martinez.

Warning(s): Descriptions of grief, Mentions of death, Cursing (lots of it), Mildly sexual themes (nothing explicit), Mentions of malnourishment.

A/N: I absolutely adore The Martian, but I've noticed a criminally low amount of fan content for it, so I decided to make some! I've decided to follow more closely to the book plot rather than the movie (Just because I like the dialogue more and it's more scientifically accurate). However, there will be a couple scenes from the movie sprinkled in just because I thought they were fun. I hope you enjoy!

It was the morning of Sol 6 and you were up early to make some coffee before your EVA mission. The past few days on Mars had been busy, but far more rewarding than you could have ever imagined. You were one of the geologists in the Ares 3 crew, along with Commander Lewis of course. Mars, to you, was a playground of science. A giant sphere of discovery you couldn't wait to explore.

Today's EVA was to gather samples from near the hab. You had seen plenty of rocks on the way in that you needed to overturn almost as much as you needed oxygen to breathe.

You sensed a hand on the small of your back and felt goosebumps trail up your spine. "Morning Y/L/N. Anything to report?" A playful voice proclaimed.

"Other than bland coffee and terrible sleep, nothing of interest~" You turned back and smiled at your boyfriend. He brushed his thumb over a patch of exposed skin on your lower back before pulling his hand away.

"Hey, at least you don't have to sleep under Martinez, bastard was tossing and turning all night." He smirked as he made his own cup. "I'm barely getting by, the only thing keeping me grounded is this bland ass coffee."

You snickered and rolled your eyes. "Poor baby," You teased.

You and Mark Watney had been together for almost three years, in secret of course. NASA isn't exactly fond of sending couples into space where they might throw caution to the wind and procreate in transit. You were professionals, this mission was something you both had been looking forward to since it was announced. But that wouldn't stop the Space Administration from removing you both from Ares 3.

Nobody knew you were together. Not NASA, not your families, not even the crew knew of your relationship. As far as anyone was concerned, you were just great friends (inseparable in fact). You went out for dinners, went on morning jogs together, spent late nights gaming and going over the mission handbook. Everyone knew you confided in one another and worked incredibly as a team. But nobody would have guessed that instead of playing Yahtzee together on your evenings off, Mark was slowly and deliciously making you breathless with his lips, melting you with his touch.

Once the mission actually started, it was much harder than anticipated to cut out the physical affection. There were cameras everywhere on the ship and absolutely no way to hide from them. The only place for privacy was the bathrooms, but you had a rather close call that involved Mark dragging you there under the guise of helping him with his laptop (which obviously earned an eyebrow raise from Johanssen,) only for him to kiss you with the desperation of a man dying of thirst. You were nearly caught by Beck and you both decided not to risk it again. Luckily, you and Watney were a couple of problem solvers.

Instead of kisses, you resorted to touching. A hand on the back, an arm on the shoulder, a nudge of the elbow. Casual touch became your replacement for intimacy.

Mark pulled a smug smile and wrapped his arm around your shoulder. "You know what Y/N, I am a poor baby. But I can think of something that would make me feel better..." He whispered close to your ear. You flushed and playfully shoved him back.

"In your dreams Watney." You scoffed but your hand lingered on his stomach, earning a cheeky grin from the botanist.

"How'd you know?" He laughed, glancing down at your lips briefly. You knew what he was thinking: that it had been awhile and maybe he could risk just a little peck. Mark was a reckless one, that's for sure.

"Guys, quit flirting so loudly. I was trying to get a few minutes extra sleep before Lewis pulls out the bugle," Beck strolled in and grabbed a ration packet.

"Flirting? With him?" You asked incredulously, jabbing your thumb toward Mark.

"And vice versa," Beck shrugged.

"You must be seeing things, maybe we should call a doctor?" Watney sassily took a sip of his drink.

"Hilarious," Beck replied. Chris had been fighting for you and Mark to get together for about as long as you've known him (which is a decent number of years, in case you were wondering.) Little did he know you had already jumped that fence. You felt bad for keeping it from him, but you were sure he'd understand given his thing with Johanssen.

"Oh good, you guys are already up." Lewis sighed "hey, can one of you wake up Martinez? He's not listening to a single word I say."

You gave Watney a sidelong glance. He groaned and downed the rest of his terrible space coffee. "Yeah sure, I can go get the bastard. I'll give him a piece of my mind while I'm at it." Mark stomped off to the bunks and Lewis followed him. You casually sat beside Beck, who gave you a knowing smile.

"You know Chris, it would probably happen on its own if you didn't push it so much." You mumbled against the rim of your cup in an attempt to hide a smile.

"It's obvious he likes you too. Practically written all over his face," Beck said. "Honestly though, you two don't even realize when you're flirting. It's kind of incredible."

You huffed, "Now's not the best time for all that, you know."

"I know, I know. Just, keep it on the table okay?"

"Whatever you say Dr. Beck," You snickered. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have an EVA to prep for."

Chris rolled his eyes and poked at the food on his plate, "you're excused."

~~~

"Alright team, stay in sight of each other. Let's make NASA proud today." Lewis announced.

"How's it looking over there Watney?" Martinez asked.

"Well, you'll be happy to hear that in grid section 14/28, the particles are predominantly coarse. But in 29 they're uh... much finer. That should be ideal for chem analysis."

"Oh wow! did everyone hear that? Mark just discovered dirt! Should we alert the media?" Martinez teased. Mark glanced up at you, but you couldn't see his face behind the helmet.

"Hey, you better watch it fly boy. I'm working this grid too!" You laughed.

"Sorry, what are you doing today Martinez? Making sure the MAV is still upright?" You could hear the smirk in Mark's voice.

"Well, I'd like you to know that visual inspection of the equipment is imperative to mission success," Rick preached. "I'd also like to report that the MAV is still upright."

You and Mark giggled as you worked on the grid. "Watney, you're keeping your channel open, which leads to Martinez responding, which leads to all of us listening, which leads to me being annoyed," Lewis scolded halfheartedly.

"Roger that, Martinez the captain would like you to please uh," Mark looked at you for approval and continued. "Shut your smart mouth."

Rick cackled and you playfully nudged Mark on the shoulder.

"We'd prefer you use a different adjective to describe Martinez's mouth." Beck said from inside the Hab, resulting in even more laughter from the rest of the crew.

"Did Beck just insult me?!"

"Dr. Beck and yes!"

"I'm happy to turn the radios off from here commander. Just say the word." Johanssen suggested.

"Johanssen, constant communication is the hallmark-" Watney started.

"Shut him off" Melissa gave the order.

"No-" Johanssen cut him off. Mark tossed his little hammer in the dirt and looked back at the captain like she had just kicked a kitten. You patted the shoulder of his suit and urged him to get back to work.

"I'm sorry for my countrymen, Vogel." Lewis said.

"Accepted," Vogel shrugged and glanced up at the sky. "The storm... It's closer than Houston reported."

"We've got time," Lewis said. "Focus on the task at hand. This EVA's all about chemical analysis. Vogel, you're the chemist so you're in charge of what we dig up."

"Ja, Please dig thirty centimeters and get soil samples. At least one hundred grams each. Very important is thirty centimeters down." Vogel clarified, eyes back on his work.

"Will do, stay within a hundred meters of the Hab," Lewis said.

You worked in peace and quiet for a few minutes. You measured the grid while Mark hammered the grid labels. You could hardly wait to take samples. Mark was right, it was perfect for chem analysis. Unfortunately, your work was short-lived because Johanssen had some bad news.

"Commander, you should come inside. You're gonna want to see this."

"What is it?" Lewis asked.

"Houston has upgraded the storm to 'severe.' It's going to be here in fifteen minutes." Johanssen said.

You perked your head up to get a look at the sky. Already it was getting darker.

"Martinez, how's it looking?" Asked commander Lewis.

"Not good." He said.

After a moment of contemplation, Lewis made her decision. "Back to base."

~~~

The Hab shook and the sound of wind and debris outside only exacerbated the tension within. Lewis commanded everyone to put on their flight suits and you congregated around the screen, wondering if this was the end of your mission.

"Sustained winds over one hundred kilometers per hour now. Gusting to one twenty-five," Johanssen frowned.

"Jesus, we're gonna end up in Oz," Watney said. "What's the abort speed?"

"One fifty kilometers per hour, anymore than that and the MAV's in danger of tipping." Martinez placed his hands on his hips.

"Any predictions on the storm track?" Lewis asked.

"This is the edge of it... It's gonna get worse before it gets better." Johanssen delivered the bad news with confidence. Silence fell over the group and you grabbed Mark's hand. You wished you could feel the warmth, but the gloves on the flight suit acted as a barrier. Watney met your sorrowful eyes. You'd have to end the mission before it even started. He let go of your hand and pressed you into his side. It was over. 25 sols early. You leaned your head against his shoulder and willed the grief to subside.

"Alright, prep for abort. We'll go to the MAV and hope for the best. If the wind gets too high, we launch." Lewis grabbed her helmet.

~~~

Outside the Hab, the wind was disastrous. Mark was nearly swept off his feet by the force of the gusts. He slammed into you, but you managed to keep him on his feet.

"Shit! Thanks." Watney regained his balance.

"Visibility is almost zero. If you get lost, hone in on my suit's telemetry! The wind's gonna be rougher away from the Hab, so be ready!" Lewis warned.

The Ares crew stumbled toward the MAV with ever increasing uncertainty. You had to lean into the wind to avoid being thrown backward. Mark wasn't doing much better. It didn't help that his mind wasn't on getting to the MAV safely, it was on how to keep it upright. Watney was smart, too smart for his own good.

"Hey," Watney panted. "Maybe we could shore up the MAV. Make tipping less likely."

"How?" Lewis Huffed.

"We could use cables from the solar farm as guylines. The rovers could be anchors. The trick would be getting the line around the-"

You choked on your scream as Mark was struck by a massive piece of wreckage, sending him off into the disorienting mist of dust and wind.

"MARK!" You screamed and tried to stumble after him, but you could barely see an inch in front of your helmet.

"What happened?" Lewis said.

"Something hit him!" Johanssen said shakily.

"Watney report..." Lewis said. You listened hard and prayed he'd answer. "Watney, report!" Nothing.

"He's offline, I don't know where he is." Johanssen reported as calmly as she could. You bit back a whimper as you shuffled forward.

"Commander, before we lost telemetry, his decompression alarm went off!" Beck said.

"Shit! Y/L/N, where did you last see him?" Lewis asked.

"H-he was right in front of me and then he was gone," you managed. "He flew off due west" You pointed.

"Okay, Martinez, get to the MAV and prep for launch. Everyone else, home in on Johanssen."

"Dr. Beck, how long can a person survive decompression?" Vogel asked.

"Less than a minute." Beck looked back at you. You could hear the pain in his voice. No. Mark couldn't be... He was just beside you a moment ago.

"Commander, the MAV's got a seven degree tilt. It'll tip at 12.3."

"Copy that."

He's alive, he can't be dead!

"Johanssen, Watney's bio-monitor sent something before going offline. My computer just says 'Bad Packet,'" Beck said.

"Give me a sec," Johanssen said.

"Commander, message from Houston. We're officially scrubbed. The storm's definitely too rough."

"Copy."

"Beck, I have the raw packet!" Johanssen said, "It's plaintext: BP 0, PR 0, TP 36.2. That's as far as I got."

Beck sighed and shook his head. "Blood pressure zero, pulse rate zero, temperature normal..."

Your chest tightened and your eyes burned. "Temperature normal?" You asked hopefully.

"It takes a while for the-" Beck swallowed. "It takes awhile to cool."

"Commander, tilting at 10.5 degrees now, with gusts pushing it to 11." Martinez reported.

"Copy, if it tips, launch."

"What about you commander?"

"I'm going to search a little more."

"You really think I'll leave you behind?" Martinez asked.

"I just ordered you to. You four, get to the ship." Lewis replied.

"Let me help search commander, we'll find him faster if we-" Lewis cut you off.

"That's an order, Y/L/N. Go."

Beck nudged you forward. You reluctantly allowed him to.

"Johanssen, would the rover IR camera do any good?"

"Negative. IR can't get through sand any better than visible light."

"What about the proximity radar? Could it detect Watney's suit?"

"No way. It's made to see Hermes, not the metal in a single space suit."

"Give it a try," Lewis ordered.

"Commander, I know you don't want to hear this... but Wat-... Mark's dead." Beck said.

No.

No.

Please...

Everything around you was a blur. You went through the motions from training. Strapping yourself in, readying your station, waiting for launch. You couldn't look at the empty seat beside you. You couldn't think about anything but your job right now, If you allowed your thoughts to that dark place, you'd have to be dragged along by the rest of the crew.

You couldn't do that to them. Not now.

Lewis returned to the ship and strapped herself in. "Still at pilot-release," Martinez said softly. "Ready for launch."

You swallowed the lump in your throat.

"I'm sorry Commander, you need to verbally-"

"Launch."

You felt the bone-crushing power of ascent. The g's did nothing but forcefully push the tears from your eyes.

You wish it would have been you.

~~~

Mark Watney closed out of the mission log application and stared at the computer screen for a few minutes. He couldn't fathom the hopelessness he was feeling, it was too deep to swim out of. What else was there to do but sit and wait to die? Maybe it would be easier to just go into the airlock and open the doors!

Watney turned his head to a picture of you on the wall behind the computer. It was there among other pictures of the crew and their families. You were standing with your brother in front of one of those rickety wooden roller coasters at Six Flags. He felt a painful twinge in his chest. You thought he was dead and there was no way to tell you otherwise.

He was completely alone, had the whole goddamned planet to himself. Mark rubbed his hands over his face. "Fuck..." he said. "Fuck!" he pulled at the hair on his head before looking up at the picture again. He wished he would have kissed you. He wanted to that morning when you were sharing coffee. He should have said he loved you. Mark hadn't said it in so long.

He knew you like the back of his hand. You were blaming yourself. Everyone in the crew was probably doing the same. He could barely stomach the thought.

Mark grabbed the picture from the wall and shuffled to the bunks. He was so tired and in a lot of pain from the stupid antenna. He was about to settle into his bed, when his eyes landed on yours. After a moment of deliberation, he hobbled into your bunk and pulled the covers up to his chin. It still smelled like you. He buried his face into your pillow and cried.

~~~

You sat in the dining area in the Hermes, watching as the windows slowly spun around. It had been about a week since the incident and you weren't sure you had any more tears left to cry. You did your best to keep on task during your waking hours, only allowing yourself to feel when everyone else was either asleep or taking the piloting shift.

Your fingers drummed lightly against the table, mingling with the beeps, boops, groans, and hums of the ship keeping you safe from the unforgiving vacuum of space. You thought about a lot of things. About Mark, his parents, the house he wanted so badly to buy, his favorite music, his plants growing in the botany lab... The one thing you didn't want to think about was his body, how it would be buried by sand and dust within the year, how Mars would never let it decay. You tried not to think about how if you had just reached for him, maybe he'd still be alive.

"Y/N?" A familiar German accent spoke. You tensed and dared a glance back at Vogel.

"Hey, what's up?" You plastered a grin on your face.

"I have noticed you've not been sleeping. You are... Okay?" He asked, lumbering closer. He was clearly very tired and you felt terrible he was here worrying about you instead of getting some much deserved rest.

"Yeah... Yeah I'm okay Alex, just... Can't sleep." You sighed.

"Have you spoken to doctor Beck? I am sure we have sleep medication on board."

"Oh I know... I just don't really want to bother him, you know? I mean, we're all going through it right now..." You shifted under his gaze.

"You are having bad dreams," Vogel stated. "You're afraid if you sleep, they will come back."

"How could you tell?" You peeked tiredly up at him.

"My little monkeys... before I left, some of them had bad dreams. A father can always tell." He sat down beside you at the table.

You felt your eyes burning again. You hadn't dared ask for comfort from your crew mates, not even Chris. Now that you were receiving it, you wished you had asked for it long ago. There was a hellish cocktail of emotions running through you: relief, sadness, safety, longing, despair. You were so relieved that Alex was here. You were sad to think about how deeply his loved ones must be missing him. You thought about what Alex said about his "little monkeys." Mark would have made a great father if he'd only had the chance.

"You love him. Very much," Vogel said.

"I did..." You whispered.

"You do." Alex grabbed your hand and the tears poured from your eyes. "You do..."

"I do," You let out a choked sob. Vogel pulled you into a gentle hug.

"This pain of loss we feel... It will never go away. But it will get easier to live with as time goes by. This, I promise is true."

"Thank you Alex." You whispered.

"You're welcome..." He patted your back and pulled away. "Now, shall we try some rest?"

"I'll try," you put on a brave face.

"And- what is it?-" He thought aloud. "When first you don't succeed-"

"Try try again," You said with a sad smile. "Words to live by."

~~~

LOG ENTRY: SOL 23

So, I'm still brain storming the whole, "Mark Watney can only really make his potato farm last 90 days," problem. Can't say It's going too well. I'm surrounded by the stench of my own shit. Kinda distracting.

I've made the executive decision to take a long overdue break out in the rover. Sure, logically I know I should probably utilize every spare second on planning my survival right down to the last drop of water, but riddle me this: just who is gonna stop me? Not NASA, that's for sure.

It's funny. I came into the rover to escape the rancid poop smell, but it seems to have followed me. Turns out, I was the poop smell all along! If Y/N were here, they would have forcibly shoved into the shower. They'd say something like... "Don't even think about touching me until you smell like ocean breeze!" (What does ocean breeze even smell like? How do you smell a breeze?...)There are few things in life Y/N hates more than stink. Me being on Mars is probably one of them.

What I would give to see you right now. Even just a dream would be nice, but I guess that's asking too much.

I miss my parents a lot. Maybe that's an understatement. I haven't really let myself think about it, but sitting here in this cramped rover really has my mind wandering. I really should have told them about Y/N. Maybe if things don't work out for me, they could confide in each other.

I don't have much else to say. The calculations aren't done and quite frankly, I'm depressed.

I'll probably scrub this log from the system, It's kind of a downer.

~~~

You had been doing better. Getting at least 6 hours of sleep a day was an accomplishment and you were eating your meals, but a certain date on the calendar was growing closer. You made yourself busier and busier, but no amount of work would keep this day from coming.

LOG ENTRY: SOL 62

On Earth it's January 8th, which is a very special day. Our anniversary! It's official, we've been together for three years! Yeah, yeah I hear you. These logs are for work purposes only, but I promise no one's gonna see this one. Not even you.

I think about that day a lot. It was freezing outside and snowing everywhere. I don't even remember why we walked to the cafe that day, but I'm thankful for it. You were holding your hot cup so tightly and your coat wasn't nearly thick enough for the weather. You were complaining that the snow came early and I laughed at you.

I think we both knew for a long time that this would happen. A year at least. We kept ourselves just at arms length, on the brink of lovers without ever crossing that line. We never discussed it before, but we knew once the mission was over, we'd do it. We'd take that step.

I had wanted to kiss you all day. Want isn't really the word for it. How about craved. Desired? Yearned~

I wrapped my coat around you and you complained again, said that I'd catch a cold and it would all be your fault. The way you looked at me... Still gives me chills when I think about it. It's like I'm still standing on that sidewalk, snowflakes landing on my nose.

I told you, "I can think of something that'll warm us both up..."

You said, "Then what are you waiting for?"

I was right of course. I always am. I just didn't expect you to be so... magnetizing! Like damn babe, you had me weak in the knees! (What am I, a Disney princess?)

I'll be back with you someday. It'll be your anniversary present from me. You're welcome in advance. XOXO - World's Handsomest Boyfriend.

-P.S. You left your deodorant in the Hab. I've been using it. Totally not creepy.

-P.P.S. Who's the stinky one now?

-P.P.P.S. You better be prepared, when I get off this wasteland of a planet, I'm making up for lost time. You aren't gonna be able to walk for AT LEAST a week.

-P.P.P.P.S. I was talking about CUDDLING you perv~

(or was I? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°))

~~~

This had to be one of the greatest days in Mark Watney's life.

Contact.

Sweet, sweet contact!

[11:18]JPL: Mark, This is Venkat Kapoor. We've been watching you since Sol 49. The whole world's been rooting for you. Amazing job, getting Pathfinder. We're working on rescue plans. JPL is adjusting Ares 4's MDV to do a short overland flight. They'll pick you up, then take you with them to Schiaparelli. We're putting together a supply mission to keep you fed until Ares 4 arrives.

Watney could hardly believe it! Everything was working! They had known he was alive since Sol 49! His eyes were brimming and his breathing came out in short gasps as he fought to control himself. He used to take messages for granted, now they're the only tether he has to humanity.

He's not alone anymore.

His hands shook as he wrote out his message.

[11:29]Watney: Glad to hear it. Really looking forward to not dying. I want to make it clear it wasn't the crew's fault. What did they say when they found out I was alive?

Mark shifted in his seat. The reply was taking a bit longer than expected. He hadn't talked to anyone in so long. The thought of being so close, only to fail right in the beginning was terrifying. He wasn't sure he could survive that kind of disappointment.

[11:48]JPL: We haven't told the crew you're alive yet. We wanted them to focus on their own mission.

What. The. Fuck.

Mark covered his face with his hands and released a frustrated groan. "You've got to be shitting me!"

You didn't know. You didn't know he was alive.

"What the fuck? Wha... What the fuck?!" He took a shaky breath and wrestled with his frustration.

[12:05]Watney: They don't know I'm alive? What the fuck? WTF? Seriously! What the fuck is wrong with you?

[12:23]JPL: Please watch your language. Everything you type is being broadcast live all over the entire world.

They did not just say that.

After everything he has been through, there is no way JPL just told him to watch his language.

So, that's how they want to play it, huh?

[12:42]Watney: Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck shit fuck shit fuck! Fuck fuckity fuckfuckfuck! Oh look! A pair of boobs!-> (.Y.) How's that for watching my language, you goddamned bureaucratic felchers!

NASA got the message loud and clear.

~~~

Four months passed and you fell into a routine. Wake up, eat, work, sleep, repeat. It was predictable, which was something you were thankful for.

You took on Watney's role as the ship's botanist. You weren't as good as him, but really, who was? You couldn't match his skill even if you tried. Still, you followed all of his experiments. Took diligent notes and snapped as many pictures as you could.

Martinez joked that you took better care of the plants than yourself. It was one of those jokes meant to expose an underlying issue: You weren't looking after yourself. There was a shadow hanging over everything you did. The crew was experiencing it too. Mark Watney was one of a kind. Everyone he touched felt his loss so viscerally, so deeply.

You needed time, just like Vogel said. But that didn't mean everyone had to be okay with you beating yourself up like this.

Lewis knew better than anyone how you were feeling. As the Commander, she should have tried a little harder. And you... You were right there in arm's reach. Yes, Lewis knew how you felt only too well.

You heard a faint Knock in the doorway. You looked up from the camera and met Beck's eyes.

"Data dump will be completed soon. Care to join?" He smiled.

You managed a smile back, "Yeah, sure. I'm hoping I got something from my siblings. Maybe my niece and nephew too." You strapped the camera to the wall so it wouldn't float away, then you pushed yourself toward your crewmate.

"How about your parents?" He asked.

"Oh, that's a given. I can't get them to leave me alone," you chuckled.

You floated down to Semicone-A, where everyone else was already waiting for the data dump.

"Is it here yet?" Beck asked.

"Almost, it's at ninety-eight percent." Johanssen shot him a grin.

"You're looking cheerful, Martinez," Beck laughed.

"My son turned three yesterday." He beamed. Should be some pics of the party. How about you?"

"Oh, nothing special. Just some peer reviews of a paper I wrote a few years back."

"Complete," Johanssen said. "All the personal e-mails are dispatched to your laptops. Also there's a telemetry update for Vogel and a system update for me....Huh.... There's a voice message addressed to the whole crew."

"Play it." Lewis shrugged. Everyone gathered around the screen as Beth pressed play.

"Hermes, this is Mitch Henderson," the message started.

"Henderson? Talking directly to us without CAPCOM?"

Lewis raised her hand to signal silence.

"I have some news. There's no subtle way to put this:.....Mark Watney's still alive."

Your stomach dropped.

"Wha-" Beck choked.

"I know that's a surprise. And I know you'll have a lot of questions. We're going to answer those questions. But for now I'll just give you the basics. He's alive and healthy. We found out two months ago and decided not to tell you. I was strongly against all that. We're telling you now because we finally have communication with him and a viable rescue plan. It boils down to Ares 4 picking him up with a modified MDV. We'll get you a full write-up of what happened, but it's definitely not your fault. Mark stresses that every time it comes up."

You clenched your eyes shut as they burned painfully with tears.

"Take some time to absorb this. Your science schedules are cleared for tomorrow. Send all the questions you want and we'll answer them. Henderson out."

Silence fell over the bridge.

"He...He's alive?" Martinez beamed.

"He lives." Vogel nodded excitedly and squeezed your shoulder.

"Holy shit!" Beck laughed. "Holy shit! Commander! He's alive!"

"I left him behind," Lewis muttered.

You covered your eyes with your hands, fighting to stay quiet.

"No, hey... we all left togeth-"

"You followed orders...I left him behind. In a barren, unreachable, godforsaken wasteland." Lewis scowled and trudged off the bridge.

Everyone stood around the console. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

"Y/N?" Chris asked softly.

"Are you okay?" Beth added.

You shook your head. You couldn't look at any of them right now.

"I need a minute..." you said softly before hurrying back out of the Semicone. You retreated back to the comfort of the botany lab. It was all so much to process.

First Mark is dead, you left him behind to die. Then Mark is alive, you left him behind to die. He doesn't want you to blame yourselves, it was terrible luck. He's healthy. He can contact Earth. Mars is a desolate planet. He's all alone. On an entire planet. You left him there. He will never be safe until he's back on Earth soil. It will be four years until Ares 4 arrives.

He will be alone on Mars for four years.

You left him there.

~~~

Y/N,

I'm typing this letter to you because talking to you relaxes me. I won't actually be sending this to you. It's not going to be professional in nature like the other notes I've sent you. (JPL says that you have received all of them, but have neglected to send me any of your responses. The only one I have gotten from any of the crew was one from Lewis. She invited me for beer to make up for leaving me on Mars.)

Anyway, some bad stuff happened. I wish you were here. Not because I want you to have been launched by an airlock. Never that. I just really fucking miss you. I really need you right now. I almost died last night. I had to do some serious surgery on my suit to keep me alive and I had to sift through the dilapidated remnants of the Hab to find a new one.

I'm so tired. I just want you to hold me. I'm so sick of all of this. Fuck Mars, Fuck the Hab. I'm so sick and tired of getting my hopes up and being disappointed. I miss you so much. You make every one of my bad days good. I know if you were here, everything would be okay again.

Why did this have to happen?

Mars keeps throwing curve balls at me, but I'm not giving up. I've got a lot to look forward to and I'm trying to focus on that.

-Mark

P.S. Your bed stopped smelling like you a month ago.

~~~

The crew of Ares 3 met in the Rec. A secret message had arrived not even an hour ago. One that would alter their mission by 533 extra days.

"Are we going to do it?" Johanssen asked.

"I won't lie, I'd sure as hell like to. But this isn't a normal decision. This is something NASA expressly rejected. We're talking about mutiny. And that's not a word I throw around lightly," Lewis explained. "We'll only do it if we all agree. And before you answer, consider the consequences. If we mess up the supply rendezvous, we die. If we mess up the Earth gravity assist, we die. If we do everything correctly, we add 533 days to our mission. 533 days of unplanned space travel where anything could go wrong. Maintenance will be a hassle. Something might break that we can't fix. If it's life-critical, we die."

"Sign me up!" Martinez announced, causing you to smile. At least someone else was as enthusiastic to bring Mark home as you were.

"Easy, cowboy. You and I are military. There's a good chance we'd be court-martialed when we get home. As for the rest of you, I guarantee they'll never send you up again," Lewis said.

"If we do this," Vogel looked to you and back at Lewis. "It would mean over one thousand days of space. This is enough space for a life. I do not need to return."

You couldn't have possibly said it better yourself. It was like Alex was reading your mind.

"Sounds like Vogel's in. Me too obviously," Martinez laughed.

"Let's do it," Beck agreed.

"If you think it'll work, I trust you," Johanssen said.

Lewis nodded and turned to you. "Y/L/N?"

"You don't even need to ask me. Let's go get our boy," You smiled.

Wow. This is the first time you've smiled... a real smile, since leaving Mars.

'Hang in there babe,' You thought. 'I'm on my way.'

~~~

LOG ENTRY: SOL 192-2

Yep, another secret letter do my dear, long lost love~ How predictable. I don't really care, today's been a great day. I can't believe you're coming back for me! Here I was, thinking I'd have to survive without you for four years. Then there you go, riding in from the sunset to bring me home.

Logically I know the rest of the crew had something to do with it, but I kind of like the idea that maybe I am a Disney princess and you're my knight in shining armor coming to rescue me.

It's like the story of Rapunzel, except my tower is a whole planet and instead of catching my hair, you're catching my MAV. Now that I think about it, the stories are more different than they are similar.

That hardly matters though, what does matter is that for the first time I actually feel like I'll survive. I trust our team with every fiber of my being, but most of all I trust you. I'm gonna rest easy tonight. And in the morning I'll start my work on the rovers!

See you in about a year babe! I'll be counting down the hours. Literally.

LOG ENTRY: SOL 426

Happy anniversary Y/N! You thought I'd forget? Never! You know why that is? Because I fucking love you, that's why!

Four years we've been together as of today, that's assuming we are counting the year we've been apart as "being together", (which I do.) Today I'm really beating myself up over frying Pathfinder with my drill all those months ago. It was my only form of communication with you and I royally fucked it up.

You'd think that cutting myself off from Earth, NASA and humanity at large would be what upset me the most. Nope, it's the fact that I can't send you a super sneaky secret anniversary e-mail. I also missed my parents' birthdays, your birthday, Christmas AND Thanksgiving. Twice. Also, fucking Valentine's day! I used to hate that holiday before I met you.

Anyway, as you can see, I totally have all my priorities in order! Also! I got you a present~ Since you have no way to read this, I don't feel bad spoiling it for you. I found a little rock. It's in the shape of a heart.

Awwww wow! That's cute, I just realized that I'm giving you my heart for our anniversary! To be honest, you had it a long time ago.

I miss you. I miss your smell, your eyes, the feel of your skin. Most of all, I really, really miss your voice. I just want to hear you. I've forgotten what you sound like. I'm scared If I didn't have this picture of you and your brother, I'd forget what your face looks like too.

I'm starting my long commute to Schiaparelli in 23 days. It'll be a two month drive. I really hate driving in the rover. But if it gets me to you, who cares? I'm stalling. I've got a lot of work tomorrow and I just want to enjoy today. I wish I was there with you to enjoy it obviously, but we can't all get what we want (least of all, me.) I've learned how to settle.

Speaking of settling, what do you think about getting married in the woods, or a big grassy field? I'd like there to be as much green as possible. No red or orange, we're talking the opposite side of the color wheel here. I can picture you walking down the aisle. I'll be an absolute mess, but who cares. You're the love of my life. Thanks for, y'know, coming back to pick me up instead of leaving me to die on Mars.

I hope you like the rock.

-Mark

P.S. I grew a beard and my hair looks like the 80's had a baby with a grease monster. You'd hate it.

P.P.S. I hope you're into pirates~

P.P.P.S. Y/N Watney... Mark Y/L/N... hmmmmm, so hard to choose!

P.P.P.P.S. We are never eating potatoes again.

P.P.P.P.P.S And ABSOLUTELY NO DISCO MUSIC!

~~~

You stared at Mars creeping back into view. The last time you were here, Mark was sitting beside you, arm around your waist, your head on his shoulder. Maybe it wasn't your most subtle of moments, but how could anyone not be enthralled by the beauty of the red planet? Even now it was hard not to feel stricken with wonder.

Sometimes your mind played tricks on you. You'd see a speck of dust on the window and think you could see Watney on the surface. That was ridiculous of course, There is no possible way to see an individual person this far out. That didn't stop you from imagining it.

NASA had briefed everyone on the Martian's health, explained that he wouldn't look the same as the last time you saw him. You expected as much, but the thought still worried you. It wasn't that you were worried if you'd still find him attractive, there was no force on Earth or beyond that could change how much you loved Mark Watney. It was his health that worried you.

During all your back and forth questions with NASA that Henderson had arranged, you inquired about his health. They said he was doing well, but that he was stretching his little amount of food to its limits. That's what scared you the most. How would his immune system fare? How would he acclimate back to normal food on Earth? All of these questions went unanswered. NASA was honest, "we won't know for sure until he gets here."

"Mind if I join you?" Lewis asked softly, floating a short distance away.

"Of course Commander. I'd like the company," You said. It was surprising to realize you actually meant it. It'd been awhile since you wanted to spend time with anyone.

Melissa floated further into the cupola and settled beside you.

"Crazy to think that in a few days he'll be up here with us again..." Lewis said softly.

"Yeah..." you said softly, keeping your eyes ahead.

"I know how much you miss him... You two were always great friends."

You swallowed hard and tried to ignore the pit in your stomach as you nodded. "Yeah..."

You could see Lewis looking at you out of the corner of your eye. Her expression was conflicted. "I'm really sorry this happened. I know it's been hard on you. I should have searched a little longer-"

"Commander." You stopped her from continuing. "You did all you could. You made the right decision. I wish none of this had happened, but none of this was your fault. It couldn't have been easy to make the choice, and I'm willing to bet that if I were in your shoes, I wouldn't have been strong enough to do it. I'm sure everyone else feels the same exact way, Mark included." You placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Thanks, that's... Thank you," Melissa smiled.

"We're a team, that's what we do. We keep each other grounded."

"That's actually sort of what I wanted to talk to you about..."

"What do you mean?"

"NASA just sent the message a few minutes ago. They're letting us talk to Watney... Directly," Lewis said. You blinked in surprise. No matter how many times you asked, NASA wouldn't allow any kind of direct communication. You wondered why the sudden change of heart.

"Henderson thinks we need to remind him of what he has to look forward to, keep his eyes on the prize so to speak. At least, that's how he's been pitching it to the director. Anyway, the rest of the crew and I agree you should be the one to do it," she finished.

"R-really? I can talk to him?" You asked hopefully, hoping this wasn't a dream.

"Y/N, I can't think of anyone else he would need to hear from more."

~~~

Mark was waiting by the coms in the MAV for any final updates from NASA regarding the meticulous destruction of his ship, piece by piece. He had just finished taking out the main window and it was heavy as hell, even in Mars gravity. He was happy he at least had some time to rest after all that hard work. If he was lucky, maybe they'd wait too long and it would be too dark to get any work done. He could use a good sleep, it seemed like he was needing it more and more lately. Watney suddenly heard the telltale beeps that signaled an incoming message. He was expecting a barrage of questions about his progress, instead he got something so much better.

[19:22] Y/L/N: Hey, Mark.

Mark's voice got caught in his throat.

Y/N.

It had been so fucking long since he talked to you. His eyes burned and his hands shook. Watney leaned his head back in relief, thanking god for this incredible gift. "I just about gave up on you man..." Mark smiled to the sky before nervously typing back.

[19:23] MAV: Y/N!? Holy crap! They're finally letting you talk to me directly?

You released a sigh and covered your face with your hands. He was responding! Really responding! Everyone was looking at you. Beck beamed at you while Martinez watched on with interest. Lewis was waiting to see if you could handle it. No way you were gonna let this one chance slip through your fingers. You sniffed and wiped your eyes before responding.

[19:24] Y/L/N: Yes, NASA just gave the OK for direct communication an hour ago. We're only 35 light-seconds apart, so we can talk in near-real time. Johanssen just set up the system and I'm testing it out.

Mark sighed and smiled. Level headed and professional as always. How you had such self control, he had no idea.

[19:24] MAV: What took them so long to let us talk?

You looked up at Lewis, silently asking if you could relay the truth. She nodded.

[19:25] Y/L/N: The psych team was worried about personality conflicts. [19:25] MAV: Why? Just 'cause you guys abandoned me on a godforsaken planet with no chance of survival?

Mark typed without thinking and as soon as he hit send, he regretted it. He didn't want you to feel bad, It was a joke. You'd understand that right?

[19:26] Y/L/N: Not funny. Don't make me come down there and kick you.

Watney let out a choked laugh. Half a chuckle and half a sob.

[19:26] MAV: God I missed you.

You smiled at the screen and pushed down the urge to hug Martinez behind you. You were really talking to him! He was only 35 light-seconds away! Suddenly you realized you were blessed with an opportunity even more amazing than just talking with him. You could ask him what you had been asking in all of your disregarded emails!

[19:27] Y/L/N: We missed you too. I've had to take over the botany lab. You'll be happy to know I haven't killed any of your plants...Yet. How are you feeling? We've gotten a few updates from NASA regarding your health, but nothing in incredible detail.

Watney chuckled at the text appearing in front of him. 'Cute,' he thought.

[19:27] MAV: Awwww, are you worried about me?

The crew laughed and you shook your head, swiftly adding your response.

[19:28] Y/L/N: Do I really need to answer that?

Mark snickered and decided not to tease you. He wanted to tell you all of his woes and adequately prepare you for how much he had changed. But he didn't want to put a damper on the mood. Luckily, Watney was a master at sugarcoating.

[19:29] MAV: I'm doing okay. My clothing feels a little loose and I'm craving spaghetti. I'm also in desperate need of a shower. Other than that, I'm just fine. Looking forward to seeing you and the rest of the crew.

Your smile fell. You were happy he was being at least somewhat honest, but you knew it was probably worse than he was making out to be. Unfortunately, Watney was a master at sugarcoating.

[19:29] Y/L/N: We're looking forward to seeing you too. I think it's safe to say a big group hug is in order, if I can get Vogel in on it that is.

Watney hummed at the thought of holding you in his arms. The image was so clear, yet so far away.

[19:30] MAV: At this point, I'd even settle for holding hands. Group hug sounds nice. How are you doing Y/N? I wrote you a lot of emails.

You grimaced and thought your next words through very carefully. With the crew watching, it was hard to collect your thoughts.

[19:31] Y/L/N: I wrote you plenty of my own. There was only so much air time to be used outside of helping you survive. My guess is they put priority on Commander Lewis' emails. Rightfully so of course. I'm doing fine. I've missed you a lot. To be honest, a lot is probably a huge understatement. It's hard to express exactly what I want to say over message.

Mark nodded. You watched him presumably die, leave his 'body' behind, mourn his loss over a period of months, find out you left him there alive, be unable to talk to him for about a year, and suddenly he was here reading and responding to your messages, but you have to limit the details so as to keep those private thoughts private. He couldn't imagine what he would do if the roles were reversed. What you wanted to say needed to be kept between you and him. He understood. There was a lot he wanted to say too.

[19:32] MAV: I know what you mean. I'll be there soon, then you can tell me all about it in person. And I'll tell you all about my space crops and my long voyage to the MAV. Have I mentioned I'm a space pirate?

The crew laughed and for a moment, it felt like he was there. Really there.

[19:33] Y/L/N: Good to know you're still the funniest person on Mars. [19:33] MAV: Thanks! [19:33] MAV: Wait a minute! Rude! Don't make me come up there! [19:34] Y/L/N: Don't threaten me with a good time, Watney. [19:34] MAV: ;)

You were about to make some really elaborate emoji out of parentheses and dots, when you saw a notification from NASA. Playtime was over. You scowled as you broke the news to your boyfriend.

[19:34] Y/L/N: I hate to cut this short, but NASA wants us to keep the line open. We'll be in touch asking for updates on your progress, but don't expect too much witty banter.

Mark's heart sank a little, but there was no use in leaving such a perfect night on a sour note.

[19:35] MAV: Figures. NASA never lets me do anything fun! Tell the others I said hi. [19:36] Y/L/N: I'll be sure to pass it along!

Mark's leg tapped nervously. He knew NASA was right about keeping the line open, but he really didn't want it to end yet.

[19:36] MAV: Hey, thanks for coming to get my sorry ass. [19:36] Y/L/N: No thanks necessary. We'd do it a million times over.

Watney knew you meant it. He could feel the warmth through the bland MAV text on the screen. He couldn't wait to be up there with you...But what if something went wrong? Fuck, don't think about this now! Everything's going to be fine! Right? But what if... There was always a chance, especially on Mars, that things would not go your way. And the likelihood of him surviving this mission was slim at best. He needed to tell you. He should have said it a lot more. A whisper here and there in the hallways, maybe some stupid middle school secret code. Like hell he was going to pass up this one chance, consequences be damned.

[19:37] MAV: I love you, Y/N.

Your heart lurched in your chest. The room fell silent. Martinez lightly squeezed your shoulder. Your eyes flitted around the room to your colleagues. All of them stared with bewildered looks on their faces. What were you supposed to say? What if you got him in trouble? If he was worried about that, why would he send this in the first place?

'You know what, Fuck it,' you thought.

Watney watched the screen with baited breath. "Please..." He whispered. "Please."

[19:38] Y/L/N: I love you too Mark. Sleep well, we'll be there before you know it.

Mark released a cry of joy and typed through the tears.

[19:39] MAV: You too. Goodnight. [19:39] Y/L/N: Goodnight, Mark.

The line received no new messages after that. Mark rested there a moment before retreating back to the rover. Once the airlock had engaged, he removed his helmet and admired the picture of you and your brother he had taped to the rover computer.

He used to take those words for granted. Why say it when you could show it? He showed it to you as often as he could... At least he used to. You never made him question it for a second. You gave him compliments, brought him water on late nights, listened to his nerdy ramblings about plants and D&D. He'd help you to bed when you were too tired to stand, work out the knots in your shoulders while you typed. Over a year has passed and your grip on his heart is still firm. And when you said those three little words, all of it made sense again. Mark Watney would never again question the power of I love you. He was going to remind you every chance he got. He was going to ask you for it as often as possible. His mom and dad would hear it in every phone call, and no more excluding his friends. He loved them too. He would say it until the term loses all meaning, then he'd remember this night where I love you saved his life.

Mark took off his gloves and danced his thin fingers over the photograph.

"See you soon, baby..." He whispered, "I love you."

~~~

You pulled on your headset and took a deep, self soothing breath. In an hour, the love of your life was going to be launched into Mars's orbit in what could barely be considered a MAV. The thing was a Frankenstein version of the shuttle you had taken off the planet nearly two years ago.

You shook your head. What Mark needed right now was confidence. You could do that.

"How you feeling Y/L/N?" Martinez smiled over at you.

"Like I'm gonna throw up," You laughed.

"Anxious huh?" He smirked, "For the launch, or for your man?"

"Both," You smacked his arm and rolled your eyes. Martinez and Beck hadn't stopped giving you crap for the I love you texts. You didn't mind too much, it was nice being able to acknowledge that side of your relationship with Mark. Unfortunately it made for some rather awkward conversations with the NASA administrators.

"You got nothing to worry about, he's in good hands," Rick said reassuringly.

"I know, we're all badass trained professionals with years of experience," you chuckled. "I can't help it. I'm built to worry."

"You've checked and double checked the telemetry. Johanssen confirmed all of your calculations. It's going to be a smooth ride for sure."

"I'll believe it when I see it."

//////////

Mark scowled at his reflection in the mirror and stroked his beard. He looked like shit, no way around it. He hadn't taken a moment to really look at himself for a long time and he couldn't say he liked what he saw.

"It's the end of an era," Watney said to nobody as he grabbed the razor. "No more captain blonde-beard."

Mark took his time shaving his chin and trimming the hair on his head. By the end of it, he still looked like shit but slightly less so. He felt a little more like himself at least.

He patted his chest to make sure the picture was still there, tucked under his uniform. It was there, along with his anniversary present to you. He slipped the headset over his ears and turned it on. It was nearly time to go. Watney pulled the suit on over his head and double checked if it was all on securely.

"I'm leaving Mars today, one way or another..." He whispered. "About fucking time."

//////////

"Fuel engine green," Your voice seemed to cause time itself to slow down. Not just for Mark, but for the entire world. "Engine alignment, perfect." Mark closed his eyes took a series of deep breaths, trying in vain to keep his emotions in check. "Communications five by five. We are ready for preflight checklist, Commander."

"Copy." Lewis said. "Mission Control, this is Hermes actual. We will proceed on schedule. we have T minus two minutes, ten seconds to launch... Mark." The commander turned her attention to the man of the hour. "About two minutes Watney. How you doing down there?"

"I'm good." He swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat. "I'm anxious to get up to you. Thanks for coming back for me."

You sniffed and shot a smile to Johanssen, who sent you a grin of her own.

"We're going to make it happen. Remember, You'll be pulling some pretty heavy g's. It's okay if you pass out. You're in Martinez's hands."

"Well, tell that asshole no barrel rolls."

"Copy that, MAV."

"CAPCOM."

"Go," you said.

Mark's bottom lip quivered

"Guidance."

"Go," Johanssen said.

"Remote Command."

"Go," Martinez said.

"Telemetry."

"Go," you said again.

He couldn't fight it anymore, he let the tears fall.

"Recovery."

"Go," Beck said.

"Secondary Recovery."

"Go," Vogel said.

"Pilot."

Mark steadied his voice before speaking, "go."

"Mission control, we are go for launch. T minus ten," You said.

"Nine."

"Eight."

"Seven."

"Six."

"Five."

Mark closed his eyes and focused on your voice. "See you in a few, baby..." He whispered.

"Four."

"Three."

"Two."

"One."

The force of the blast was incredible, and growing more painful by the second. His breathing came out short and panicked as the Hab canvas rattled nightmarishly against the MAV. His panic only increased as the canvas ripped from the shuttle, exposing him to the full force of the MAV's thrust. He couldn't even scream. All he could do was watch the sky grow darker and darker.

"Watney." He heard your voice from far away.

"Watney, do you read me?" Your voice called again. His eyes drooped and his vision faded.

//////////

"Watney. Do you read?" You asked in the calmest voice you could muster.

"He's probably passed out. He pulled 12 g's on the ascent. Give him a few minutes," Beck said.

"Copy that." You said and turned your attention on the numbers before you. "I have interval pings. Intercept velocity will be eleven meters per second."

"I can make that work," Beck confirmed.

"Distance at intercept will be....we'll be sixty-eight kilometers apart..." You whimpered and buried your face in your hands.

"Did they say sixty-eight Kilometers? Kilometers?!" Beck cried.

"Keep it together, work the problem. Martinez, any juice left in the MAV?" Lewis asked.

"Negative, Commander."

"Then we'll have to go to him. Y/L/N, time to intercept?"

"Thirty-nine minutes, twelve seconds," You steeled yourself and focused on your coordinates.

"Martinez, what if we point the attitude thrusters all the same direction?" Lewis asked.

"Depends on how much we want to save for the attitude adjustments on the trip home."

"How much do you need?"

"I could get by with maybe twenty percent of what's left. If I use the other eighty percent... We'd get a delta-v of thirty-one meters per second."

"Y/L/N, Math."

"In thirty-nine minutes, we'd deflect....seventy-two kilometers! Use seventy-five point five percent of remaining attitude adjust fuel. That'll bring the intercept range to zero," You did the math quickly.

"Do it." Lewis said.

"Hold your horses, that'll get the range to zero, but the velocity will be forty-two meters per second."

"Then we have thirty-nine minutes to figure out how to slow down. Burn the jets."

//////////

Mark awoke to find himself spinning. Flashes of stars and the red glow of the Martian surface had him feeling a little dizzy. "MAV to Hermes?"

"Watney?" You gasped.

"Affirmative," he grunted.

"What's your status?" You asked calmly.

"Uhhh..." He winced and leaned back in his seat. "My chest hurts. I think I broke a rib. How are you, sweetheart?" He groaned.

"We're working on getting to you," you relayed. "There was a complication in the launch."

"Yeah," Watney dejectedly looked at the massive hole in the roof of his ship. "The canvas didn't hold. I think it ripped early in the ascent."

"That's consistent with what we saw during the launch," Lewis agreed.

"How bad is it, Commander?" he asked.

"We were able to correct the intercept range with Hermes's attitude thrusters, but there's a problem with the intercept velocity."

"How big a problem."

"Forty-two meters per second."

"Well..." Mark paused and tried to wrap his head around that number. "Shit."

//////////

You typed furiously, staring at your screen unblinkingly as you worked through all the possible ways to bring down the velocity.

"Hey, I've got an idea," Watney said.

"Of course you do, what have you got?" Lewis asked.

"I could find something sharp in here and poke a hole in my EVA suit. I could use the escaping air as a thruster and fly my way to you. The source of thrust would be on my arm, so I'd be able to control it pretty easily."

"How does he come up with this shit?" Martinez laughed.

"I can't see you having any control if you did. You'd be eyeballing the intercept using a thrust vector you can barely control."

"I admit it's fatally dangerous, but consider this: I'd get to fly around like Iron Man."

"We'll keep working on ideas," Lewis said.

"Iron Man, Commander. Iron Man."

"Stand by," Lewis temporarily cut contact with Watney.

You furrowed your brows at the screen, waiting for the correct course of action to jump out at you. Suddenly, there it was. "Wait! that's it!" you looked back at the Commander. "Mark's a genius! We could use the ship's atmosphere as thrust. We could blow the vehicular airlock. Seal the bridge and the reactor room. Iron Man... But bigger!"

"....." Melissa stared at you for a moment before addressing Alex. "Vogel?"

"Yes commander?"

"I need you to come inside and make a bomb," she ordered.

~~~

"I have visual, I can see the MAV," Beck said. "Jesus Mark, what did you do to that thing?"

"You should see the rover," Mark radioed. He was ready to get out of his goddamned chair, ready to get away from this hunk of junk that could barely be considered a MAV.

"Call out my velocity to Mark every two seconds or so," Chris said.

"Copy." You responded.

"Hey Beck, the front's wide open. I'll get up there and be ready to grab at you." Watney said.

"Negative, no untethered movement. Stay strapped to your chair until you're attached to Beck."

"Copy." Mark huffed. Lewis was right, impatience would be the death of him out here and he had come too far to die now. Instead, he focused on your voice calling out the relative velocity.

"Three point one meters per second."

"Eleven meters to target."

"Six meters."

"Contact." Beck grabbed the canvas of the destroyed MAV. "Firm contact."

"You have fourteen seconds Dr. Beck."

"Copy."

Nothing could have prepared Watney for how he'd feel seeing Beck's helmet poking through the opening.

Pure. Unadulterated. Serotonin.

"Visual on Watney!"

"Visual on Beck!"

"How ya doin' man?" Beck pushed himself toward Mark, meanwhile Mark was trying not to have another emotional breakdown.

"I....I just...Give me a minute, you're the first person I've seen in eighteen months," Watney croaked.

"We don't have a minute," Beck clumsily collided with Mark. "Contact with Watney... Connected!"

"Restraints off," Watney called.

"We're outta here!"

//////////

"Houston, this is Hermes actual. Seven crew safely aboard," Lewis's voice echoed in your mind as you, Martinez, Johanssen, and Lewis pushed yourselves toward the airlock where Vogel and Beck were bringing him in.

Mark.

You could see his dusty helmet from the small window on the airlock. Already you were feeling an overwhelming ache deep in your chest. There he was, only a few feet away, behind this door. Your crewmates flew in and clambered for Watney.

"Hey guys!" He laughed.

You were frozen in the doorway.

His helmet came off.

Everything slowed down.

Everyone was smiling and laughing. High fiving. Quick hugs. They all wanted to get as far away from the smell as they could.

Your eyes met.

There were beads of what looked like water floating in the air. When did you start crying?

Mark held out his arms to you and you wasted no more time. He hugged you as tightly as he could with the bulky arms of his EVA suit. His face buried into your neck as he cried softly. "Y/N...." He whispered in a broken voice. "Y-Y/N?"

"I'm right here Mark... Right here." You cradled the back of his head, scratching that spot at the base of his neck. He always liked it when you did that

"I stink, don't I?" Watney laughed in between sobs.

"You do. You really do," You tried to keep up the joke. "But if im being completely honest, I couldn't possibly care less," you laughed.

Slowly, you pulled back so you could get a good look at his face. He was thin. Gaunt, and covered in bed sores. That should have been expected of course, It's not like he had anywhere to shower in the rover. He looked at you like you were an angel. He looked embarrassed, like he wanted to hide.

Your fingers danced over his cheek and his eyes fluttered closed at the tenderness. The crew watched on with pride and varying degrees of bashfulness.

Mark opened his eyes and stared at you pleadingly as orbs of tears flowed from their corners. "Y/N... Please..." He whispered.

You didn't hesitate for a second.

You grabbed the sides of Mark's face and smashed your lips against his. So soft... your hands are so soft and your lips are trembling. The heat of your skin, the scent of your hair. It was even better than he remembered. He couldn't breathe, he could barely even think. He wanted so desperately to kiss you back, to fall into your embrace until there's no space left between, but his ribs hurt like hell and his suit was in the way. Mark whimpered as your fingers tangled into his hair. Fuck. Fuck. 'Everything hurts baby, please don't stop kissing me,' he pleaded in his head. 'Don't stop.'

When you started pulling away, he reached out to pull you closer again, but winced when he moved his arm.

"Slow down, baby." You breathed and pressed a little smooch to his forehead.

"Alright love birds, I need to get Iron Man over here to sick bay."

"But-" Watney protested.

"No buts, you need an X-ray and a shower. Maybe three." Beck laughed.

Mark looked at you pleadingly and you caressed his face. "I'll be by once Beck fixes you up. I gotta help check the ship for damage. Okay?"

He nodded and smiled. "Don't miss me too much~"

"You seek the impossible, Watney." You kissed his forehead again and let Chris lead your Martian down the hall to his quarters.

"Wow," Martinez said "I can't decide if that was incredibly romantic or incredibly awkward."

"Shut up Martinez," You playfully shoved his shoulder.

"Honestly though, he smells terrible! You've got some nerves of steel, Y/L/N," Johanssen joked.

"My boyfriend just spent eighteen months alone on a remote planet, If he wants a kiss he's gonna get that goddamned kiss. Definitely not a quick one and definitely not a half-assed one. But I will say one thing," you grinned.

"What's that?" Lewis smirked.

"He's not getting another one until he brushes his teeth."

~~~

Mark settled into his bunk after what felt like hours. He finally had a bath. Five, in fact. The showers were on a timer to conserve water. He had to run that timer five times before he finally felt clean. The water hurt the sores on his skin, but he felt so much better afterward that he almost wanted to go in for a sixth one. Mark brushed his teeth about three times and got rid of all the tangles in his hair. He'd need someone to touch up the cutting job he did. Now that it was all brushed out, it looked astoundingly bad.

After his long grooming session, Beck took an X-ray and determined that he'd broken two ribs. Chris bandaged him up, gave him some pain medicine, made him eat, and sent him to bed for some well deserved rest. At first, Mark protested. He hated the idea of everyone else fixing the ship while their lead engineer was taking a nap. But he was painfully tired and painfully...well... in pain.

Hey! His bunk didn't smell like shit! That's a huge upgrade from his bunk in the Hab- no more thinking about that place.

With a deep groan, Watney eased himself into bed. Weird...his sheets smelled like you. He didn't mind of course, you always smelled nice. He had never been more thankful for the centripetal force spinning the ship. He would have hated having broken ribs in zero g's. He imagined trying to sleep with his body constantly moving ever so slightly. Sounded like hell to him.

Mark wondered what the others were doing. He hoped there wasn't something too terribly wrong with the ship. The subtle groans of metal didn't ease his nerves. He was never scared of the Hermes before, but he was just now coming to terms with that fact that the ship had taken some serious abuse over the past few months, not to mention the past few hours. Normally Hermes would undergo maintenance after each mission, but because they turned around to get him that maintenance was scrapped.

New fear unlocked: Dooming his team to die in space because they had to turn around and get him.

He almost thought the knocking on his door was the hull breaking apart into a billion little bite-sized pieces.

"Come in," he said.

He expected it to be Beck checking in on him, but he was relieved when you poked your head in with a shy smile.

"Heyyyy, look over there! It's the world's handsomest boyfriend!" You said with gusto.

"You are such a kiss ass," Mark laughed, which hurt his ribs, which made him laugh again from how pitiful he must look.

You scoffed as you stepped into his quarters, shutting the door behind you. "You calling me a liar?" you grabbed a loose storage box and used it as a chair so you could sit beside his bed.

"That's exactly what I'm calling you," he smirked. "Seriously. Have you seen me lately? I look like a... a popsicle stick with a bad haircut."

You looked him up and down. His sores looked a lot better after cleaning them. You had no doubt they would heal nicely. The malnourishment on the other hand... That might take some work. You and Beck already had a few dietary plans for him. You discussed it while you reorganized the chow hall. Still, Mark was the most beautiful person you had ever seen. Even now, those alluring blue eyes were mesmerizing you. And let's not forget that goddamned tantalizing smile.

"I'm looking at you right now, babe," You giggled.

"And?"

"You're still as gorgeous as ever. Just a gorgeous man who's been through some shit," you carded your fingers through his hair. Mark hummed and closed his eyes. "How are you feeling?" you whispered.

"Physically or emotionally?"

"Both."

"Emotionally, happy. Very happy. Best day of my life kind of happy," he smiled. "Physically, pretty shitty. The medicine hasn't kicked in."

"Anything I can do to help you feel better?" you asked warmly.

Watney sent you a smug look, "Oh, I can think of a few things that might help~"

"Not until your ribs are healed."

"Damn."

You leaned down and pushed his hair back so you could kiss his forehead. He gave you a dazed grin, "oh, what do you know? I feel better already," he whispered in a gravelly voice. "... I really missed you..."

"I missed you too Mark..."

"I can't believe I can... I can feel you again. I can hear you and see you and feel you... s'insane..." He reached up and cupped your cheek despite the pain. "You were always on my mind. I-I just really wanted... I wanted to make it back to you." He brought his thumb just under your eye to catch a stray tear.

You covered his hand with yours and pressed a kiss to his palm.

"I-I don't even know what to say... I've been feeling so much, I don't know how to... how to-" He swallowed hard.

"Everything's changed so fast," you reassured him. "But we aren't on the messaging system anymore. It's a long journey home, we have plenty of time to find the right words," you continued to run your fingers into his hair.

"I fucking love you... " he closed his eyes and reveled in the feeling of your nails against his scalp. "I'm gonna marry you one day, decided just now."

"Just now?" You snickered.

"No...Realistically, it was the first night we uh... slept together. Do you remember that?" Watney chuckled.

"Of course I do," you smiled, thinking of his messy blonde hair, searing gaze, and strong arms. He took his time with you that night, unhurried, attentive, and unabashedly vocal. "How could I forget?"

Mark shook his head and looked away to hide his blush, but not even his smile could distract you from it. "Sorry, sorry. Go on, continue!"

"Well, I uh..." He let out a sheepish chuckle. "Obviously every part of that night was perfect, but it's what happened after that really changed things."

"Oh?" you leaned closer, curiosity getting the better of you.

"You let me be the little spoon. I'm fine with being the big spoon most of the time, but you gotta be the little spoon sometimes, you know? No one ever let me be the little spoon before you... And when I woke up, you were still holding me." His fingertips danced down your arm, leaving a trail of chills in their wake. Once he reached your hand, Mark intertwined your fingers. It wasn't a conscious movement for him, simply muscle memory. But you couldn't keep your mind off of it. "I know I goof around a lot, but I can't stress how serious I'm being when I say... I have never felt that loved before. It was just... such a perfect night. I knew that you were the one for me well before, but that was the first time I really saw my future flash before my eyes like that."

Your eyes stung a little as you tenderly kissed his lips. "Want to know when I decided?" you whispered against him.

"Please..." He whispered back.

"Remember when I had that terrible flu during the first year of our training program?"

"Oh damn, yeah I do! You looked terrible, baby." Mark teased.

"I felt terrible. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, and I definitely couldn't go to lectures... I was so worried about missing, even though the professors agreed there was no way I could come to class. You brought me a copy of your notes. The copy machine in the library was down, so you had to write them by hand... you even filled them with these horrible stick figure drawings," you laughed and Mark brought your knuckles to his lips and watched you, immersed in the sound of your voice. It was like he was trying to commit you to memory. You were doing much the same.

"Anyway, you stayed with me and you made some Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup. You stopped by everyday until I got better."

"We were just friends back then," he whispered against your hand.

"I know, but every time I think about how much I love you... that memory comes back, playing on repeat."

"Say that again."

"That again," you smirked. Mark gave you a sassy eyebrow. "Which part babe?" you laughed.

"The uh..." he trailed off.

You lightly kissed his cheek, "I love you, Mark... I love you so much." You peppered his face with little smooches. When you finally pulled back, he was all red again and teary eyed.

"I love you too, Y/N," He whispered. You sat together in silence for awhile before Mark suddenly remembered something extremely important! "Oh shit! I almost forgot!" He winced as he reached into his pocket. "Happy late four year anniversary!" He finally presented you with his gift.

Your fingers trembled as you took the little rock into your hands. Mark's Martian heart stared back up at you, dusting your palm orange.

"Y-you remembered our anniversary?"

"Of course I remembered! Have I ever forgotten before?" Mark smirked.

"N-no, but..." You couldn't help it, you were crying again god dammit. "Thank you Mark, I love it." You beamed and kissed him so hard he lost his entire train of thought. He sighed and pulled you closer like he had wanted to do hours ago. Fuck. There you go again, playing with his hair like it wasn't going to rile him up. He moaned and reached for your waist, only to be pulled swiftly back to reality by the jarring pain in his abdomen. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Mark." You pulled away quickly.

"It wasn't you, I was getting too carried away." He winced and took a deep breath. "My bad," Watney laughed.

You sat down on the crate beside his bed and settled for playing with his hand. While you took inventory of every new callus, Mark once again saw his future flash right before his eyes. You and him and that little house with the green shutters. He's gonna have the best garden in the neighborhood, you'll have all the time in the world for reading. No potatoes. No disco.

"Y/N... Can you hold me?"

"Oh baby, I would love to but the beds are so small-"

"Ouch, oof, oh! ow!" He scooted closer to the wall to make room for you.

You sighed and shook your head. "Mark, your ribs-"

"Please..." he whispered. Dammit! What are you supposed to do when he gives you the puppy eyes!? Beck is going to kill you...

"I can't ever say no to you, can I?" You laughed and scooted into the bed. "Seriously, you've got me wrapped around your finger."

Mark smiled as you tucked yourself into his side. He wanted to be the little spoon, but he couldn't turn over so his back was against your chest. He'd just have to heal quickly, then he could freely snuggle, (and do other things) without any constraints!

He turned his head so he could admire your lovely, beautiful face. You were already looking back at him, one hand holding your rock close to your chest, the other was draped carefully over his waist. Mark swears he's never seen anything more breathtaking in his life.

He slowly leaned closer- Fuck! His ribs hurt so bad, where the hell is the Vicodin when you need it?

You gently smoothed out the crease between his brows with your thumb and pushed his hair back again. Mark closed his eyes, succumbing to the bliss that came with knowing he would never be alone again. You kissed him again and pulled his blanket over the both of you.

"I love you, Mark."

"I love you too."

He felt your hand slip under his shirt and onto his stomach. You drew soft shapes onto his skin, but stopped when you felt the scar just above the hem of his pants. It was jagged and angry.

He swallowed.

Much to his surprise and relief, you didn't pull your hand away. You just kept tracing the new territory.

He sighed and kissed your temple. His body shuddered in relief. "Th-this isn't a dream, right? You'll still be here when I wake up?" he whispered.

You peeked your head up and smiled "I'm not going anywhere, I'm afraid you're stuck with me." You leaned in and gave him one more kiss. He smiled into it and finally allowed himself to rest his eyes.

"Don't threaten me with a good time, Y/L/N..."

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