#no more being anxious in public spaces i refuse

[b4ts1e]

▀▄▀▄▀▄First Meet Ups▄▀▄▀▄▀(𝚐𝚗!𝙼𝙲)

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛'𝚜 𝙸𝚗𝚌𝚕𝚞𝚍𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚃𝚘𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚀𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚕 𝚡𝚢𝚡 𝙼𝙲 𝚂𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚎𝚝𝚢𝙱𝚘𝚢 (𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚍)

𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐: Some are a tad bit more suggestive than the rest, just a heads up.

𝙽𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚃𝚘𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛

Anxiously he stood in the airport lobby, being in public spaces has never been their greatest strength- social anxiety sucks ass. However that wasn't the only thing he was anxious about- they were just about to meet up with MC. The two of them had been planning this for months, and now that MC has quit their old job (honestly it was about damn time) because they refused to grant them their vacation days- the two were finally able to be in each other's arms after seven months.

His phone lit up with a new notification, followed by another and another. The shit connection from the airport had delayed their arrival times.

"Landed, going to baggage claim.""Gods I'm nervous, but super excited!" "Toasty, where are you?" "Toasty" "Toast?"

Quickly they respond, foot tapping on the floor as his anxiety peaks. MC was in the building. They were so close. Excitement bursts through his chest, while the anxiety that they just couldn't shake- twisted their stomach into knots. What if he wasn't what they were expecting? What if they regret agreeing to come? The thoughts made him feel much smaller in the room crowded with people.

"Let me know when you get to the lobby, there's too many people here for me to get to the baggage claim."

MC had shot back a quick thumbs up emote, most likely focusing on their current task of retreiving their belongings. NakedToaster stood there, back to a beam, their foot tapping the ground faster now as he looked back and forth between the escalators that people were coming down from baggage claim on. When he saw an all too familiar person, typing away at their phone while going down the escalator before he got a notifcation- they knew it was them.

Carefully but also instinctively he navigated through the crowd, eyes locked on their target before he stood not even two feet away. "MC?" he spoke, reaching out and tapping the person's shoulder gently. They looked up shocked before a grin spread across their face, dropping their suitcase before jumping to pull the 6'4 giant into a hug. "TOAST!" they shouted happily, their grip tightening around his shoulders as they slowly return the embrace and a smile grew on his lips.

"H-Hey!" he said, internally beating themself up for stuttering like a fool. "C'mon let's get out of here. Too many people." they said before grabbing MC's bag for them and guiding them to the exit quickly, getting to his car. Once inside the vehicle he began to calm down a bit, "You alright? I know you don't do well with crowds hun, but I didn't think it'd be that bad. Do you want me to drive?" MC said quietly as to not overwhelm him, taking his hand gently and rubbing their thumb over the backside of it.

NakedToaster shook their head gently, offering his partner a soft smile as they blush slightly- giving their hand a gentle squeeze. "No, thank you though... I- I love you." he said softly, blush blooming farther across his cheeks and ears. MC giggles softly before Toast groaned loudly and rested their forhead on the driver's wheel. "I love you too Toast. But look at me for a second, please?" they asked, scooting closer to the center consol of the car. He picked up their head and looked towards his partner still flustered but curiously. "What gonna embarass me mo-" he started before being cut off softly as MC leaned over the console and kissed them gently.

It took a moment for Toast to register what was happening before they melted into the kiss, bringing a hand to cup MC's jawline gently- hand shaking from nerves. When the kiss broke, they both were blushing. "I- woah." he muttered softly, resulting in MC nodding softly in flustered agreement with a shakey smile before backing away to sit back in their seat.

With what just happened- Toast knew that once the month long visit was over, it'd be extremely difficult to let them go back to their house. But right now? That didn't matter to either of them.

𝚀𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝

MC paced around their house, rearranging everything to be perfect for his arrival. They needed something to do so that their nerves didn't swallow them whole, after all- Quest was coming to their house. He was going to be here, alone, with them- in all of his tattoed glory. Just the thought alone brought a small blush to MC's face before they shook the (possibly sinful) thoughts of him from their mind and contiued patting down the banket thrown over their coach for the fifth time in the last thirty minutes.

Suddenly the doorbell rang, the pre-set jingle flowing through the house- stunning MC to a stop. He was here. Quest was right outside the door, waiting for them. Quickly they take a breath, hoping to calm themself down at least a little bit more before answering the door. Wiping down their clothes from any excess dust, they take one last moment before opening the door- revealing a 6'0 man standing there in a dark blue turtle neck, a black cover up, matching slacks and a bundle of fresh red roses in his hands.

"MC! For a second here I thought I had the wrong house!" He said with a nervous chuckle, making them laugh a bit as well as they moved aside motioning him inside. "Come on in Quest, sorry I took so long opening the door. Was in the middle of something." they explained with a smile, fiddling with either hands nervously- being in person was way different then seeing this absoulte unit of a man in person.

He entered the house, looking around a bit before his eyes fall to MC's nervous form- closing the door behind them. "You alright? You seem more nervous then when SoceityBoy was in the Bloomic server..." he said softly, reaching out a free hand to them but not touching them- just in case. "Oh! I'm alright, just- it's different having you here. In my house. Rather than through screens... I- don't know exactly what to do first." they say with a small laugh, slowly guiding him towards the living room- him noticing the excessive preening the smaller of the two had done before he had gotten here.

"Well, let me try then. Here- I brought these for you." he said, extending the flowers to MC gently with a soft smile on his face. Graciously they accepted the flowers, giving them a quick whiff before looking back up to the tall man with a smile. "Thank you Quest, you really didn't need to get me anything- but this is...very sweet of you." they said, looking around for one their stored away vases to keep the gentle flowers in.

"I wanted too, after all..." he started before he gently pulled MC closer to him by the waist and leaned down towards them slightly. "I'm getting to see the most amazing partner in the entire world in person for the very first time, it felt like a necessary thing to do." he said lowly with a small smirk intergrating into his smile as he observed the blush that radiated off of MC's cheeks at their proximity.

Carefully, Quest put the flowers on the counter behind MC so they wouldn't get crushed before pulling them even closer. "Is this okay?" he asked softly, his flirtatious front falling as he took their comfort into account. After dealing with a terrible ex-boyfriend like SocietyBoy, he didn't want to make any moves that could hurt them in anyway- guess that's the Xander in him. They nod softly before their eyes flit between meeting his and his lips before they gulped softly- avoiding eye contact, but the nervous acts did not go unnoticed by Quest as he gently brought his lips to theirs. It was soft, but intense at the same time- all of the built up love and affection of six months of long distance crashing down on the two of them.

When the kiss broke, MC found themself instinctively following after him- not ready to be seperated just yet, and Quest happily obliged to his lover's desperate need for closeness. When they reconnected, the kiss was far more heated as MC gripped tightly at his turtleneck and he seemed to pull them ever closer to him as he pushed them against the counter. When it broke again, MC putting their hands gently against his chest as they looked down- catching their breath and trying to still their racing heart.

"I love you MC." he said through baited breaths. "I love you too Quest, thank you for coming." they replied with a smile, nuzzling into his chest and hugging him tightly.

𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚕

He was excited, having finally been granted permission to leave his college campus for good- shown by his architecture degree that was carefully framed and packed away in his suitcase that stood right beside him by the curb. Nightowl wasn't the type to enjoy driving, but lucky enough for him he has a loving partner in the same state that just so happens to be willing to drive for hours to bring him home. Some would call it 'going to fast' but it felt like it took too long for him.

It has been three months since he'd met and gotten together with MC, sure it was definetely a fast growing relationship- but it worked for both of them. And now? He was moving into their house, just to be closer physically. As a sleek, black Hundai Genesis G80 rolled around the entry corner he felt his excitement grow- despite the tinted glass he could see his lover in the driver's seat. When the car pulls to a stop by the curb in front of him, he started to grab his bags but paused when he heard the car door open and rushed speedwalking.

"Darling!" they said with a grin, wrapping him into a tight hug quickly before he could properly react. When the shock died down he laughed cheerfully and hugged them back just as tightly, "My love! Thank you for coming to get me, it feels so good to have you in my arms..." he said, nuzzling his face in between their shoudler and neck- memorizing their warmth and smell. MC laughed a bit, being slightly tickled by his hair brushing against their skin gently.

"It's no problem, it was an excuse to see you for one AND you're moving into my house so might as well." they say, putting a hand into the boy's hair letting him stay there as long as he felt like it. A comfortable silence erupted between the two, only the hum of the car's engine persisting. The feeling of his lover finally being in his arms was euphoric, and he couldn't stop his tendancies as he started to gently pepper kisses across the skin availible to him on the neck and shoulder space.

MC's breathing took a swift halt, the gentle kisses making their skin shiver- it had been so long since they were given this level of affection in person. It felt both foreign and familiar- but in the best way possible as they let out small shaky breaths. "Hun- we...we should get your bags into the car." they said shakily before nightowl raised his head and gave them the puppy eyes, letting out a light whine. "But gorgeous!!! I just wanna shower you with affection, pleaseeee??? A few more minutes???" he asked, puffing out his bottom lip a bit to intensify his pouty face.

MC laughed lightly at his silly shenanigans, cupping his face and placing a light peck on his nose before breaking from his grasp and grabbing his bags off of the ground to put them in the trunk. Nightowl stood there stunned for a moment before literally shaking his head like a puppy, a blush on his cheeks "H-Hey! You missed!" he practically shouted, making his partner laugh lightheartedly. "The sooner we get home, the sooner you can get an actual kiss birdy. I promise." they said with a playful smile before slipping into the driver's seat.

With a happy grin he got into the passenger side of the car, excited by the prospect of their house now becoming both of their home. Even as he sat down and buckled up, he couldn't sit still- his excitement evident and making MC chuckle a bit as they started the long drive home, a soft hand resting on his thigh the whole ride home.

𝚡𝚢𝚡

Xyx was focused, being more careful then usual on his motorcycle as he sped towards their designated meet up point- he was just moments away from the love of his life, MC. A grin spread across his face as he sped up a bit more, hoping to get there faster- he needed them close sooner rather than later, after all...it's been nine months since they've gotten together and they've never even within physical range of each other. Not once did he get to feel their delicate skin against his own, nor did he get to see their face bloom a beautiful red as he teased them directly and not through a screen.

Cat sat in front of him, strapped to his chest with a custom made helmet on their little head- they were also excited to see MC. After all, they now meowed at the screen everytime they realized Xyx was on call with them- pawing gently at the screen, trying to get to them. Eventually, he pulled to a stop in front of an apartment building, a temporary living arrangement they've made until they find a place they can both mutually agree on.

Quickly he got off the bike, turning it off and taking the keys from the ignition- putting the kick stand down and pulling off his helmet as well as Cat's. He entered the establishment quickly, carefully unstrapping cat from his chest as he approached the elevator- he knew which room he was going to already and had been given instructions for once inside the building. Apparentally, the staff at the establishment aren't permitted to show people to rooms without them having proof of rooming there- privacy and legal contracting stuff. Luckily they didn't question him as the elevator closed, and he went to the top floor- the bought out apartment he insisted on was of course the suite, only the best for the best.

He approached the door, setting Cat down on the floor before knocking and adjusting his backpack strap. The door swung open swiftly, revealing MC grinning excitedly bouncing on their toes and before Xyx could get a single word out Cat meowed loudly- pawing at their shins, making them giggle. "My two favorite beings are here! Hi hi!" they said excitedly, picking up the cat and pulling Xyx inside the suite. "So Cat gets a hug and I don't? I see how it is." he teases, pulling off his bag and leaning against the entryway wall.

"No no no! Hold on! The baby was just- she got to me first." MC defended quickly, hugging the feline to their chest and nuzzling into their fur. "Oh so it's a competition huh?" he says, a devious smirk on his face as his eyes showed he was planning something. "Y'know what? Yeah. Yeah it was, Cat just loves me more." they say turning around, acting overly sassy for show as they pet Cat's head gently- the feline releasing calming purrs.

Suddenly Xyx wrapped his arms around MC's waist, making them squeal as he picked them up from behind and walking to the couch- gently tossing them down, making Cat scurry off to explore. "H-Hey! X you could've hurt Cat!" they said playfully glaring at their boyfriend before he crawled over them, putting his face in their chest and holding them close. "She's fine, but right now? You're mine. If I have to prove it, I will. Mine." he muttered into his partner's clothed chest- his cheeks heating.

MC chuckled a bit, blush spreading across their cheeks. "How exactly would you prove that huh? Gonna make me wear a collar like a cat or something?" they tease with a laugh. He groans into their chest before lifting himself up, a soft blush on his cheeks and ears before he leans back down- face in the crook of their neck. It was a moment later that he was biting down gently on their skin, leaving soft red marks behind. "I'll think about that collar, but for now these will do." he says teasingly, kissing each one softly.

MC laughed fullheartedly, despite being flustered they found it adorable how he felt the need to show off that they were exclusively his. "You're a big softie under that memeable surface, and I love it so damn much." they say, hugging his head into their chest again. "Only for you." he muttered into their chest as he cuddled into them, listening to their heart beat- studying it and trying to match his own to it. "I never thought I'd get to say this to someone- but I love you MC." he said quietly, listening to their heart race slightly faster afterwards- making him smile. "I love you too Xyx, all of you." they said quietly in return.

The two stayed bundled up like that until Cat returned and hopped onto Xyx's back, curling into a ball and chosing him as her new bed for the moment- making him unable to move. It was a small family, but it was perfect for them.

𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 2,942

#blooming panic #bloomic #nakedtoaster #quest #nightowl #xyx #bloomic mc #reqs open #writing #ABatsie-Writes

[nocreativityfornames]

Random Obey Me! Headcanons Part 3

Asmo collects plushies, he finds the little things absolutely adorable and has tons of them in his room. And yes, you'll see Asmo's eyes lit up like a kid if you ask him about them and their individual names. He will also be glad to explain each one's little story and how he got them, and you would be endeared to find that a good portion of the plushies were given by the other brothers themselves, who have known about his love for collecting for a long time now.

Belphie is one of those people who when you ask them for something will ALWAYS blatantly say no at first but then proceed to nonchalantly do the exact thing you asked with no ounce of shame whatsoever, maybe even smirk a little as they finish doing whatever it is you asked. It's a little annoying at first, but you eventually get used to it. He's just likes being a brat, really.

Satan had an emo phase as a teenager, he would dye his hair black, only wear dark clothes, paint his nails regularly ( with the help of Asmo ), listen to typical emo music, the whole nine yards. And of course, he was more rebellious than ever, refusing to listen to his brothers and just any authority figures in general. He's ashamed of it now and cringes hard seeing pictures of himself back then. As any good father older brother would though, Lucifer always manages to embarrass him by bringing up that phase and even showing the "cursed pictures" to friends/potencial partners Satan brings home.

Levi likes to hide in small spaces when he's anxious, overwhelmed, or just doesn't wanna deal with something ( social interactions more often than not ). Oh, you're at a party and you can't find Levi anywhere? Check the less crowded room, more specifically under the tables, he's probably there playing games on his phone. Hm, it's lunch break at RAD and the third born is nowhere to be seen? Inside his locker, or maybe the janitor's closet. He doesn't know exactly why he does it, but it's a habit that's been with him ever since he was a small angel. Those places just comfort him, somehow. And don't worry, he's pretty flexible so it works out just fine. I mean, why else would he be okay sleeping in a bathtub?

MC and Mephisto didn't meet for the first during S4. In fact, these two first met only a week into the exchange program, with Mephisto interviewing MC for the RAD Newspaper. Because of course, the public was dying to know more about the newest exchange student who had just entered the academy, and multiple news outlets were covering MC's arrival and curious situation, given that they had been placed with the seven brothers at HoL, and had gotten into a pact with Mammon so quickly. Being aware of all of this, Mephisto knew that an exclusive interview with MC would give everyone in the kingdom something to talk about, and so he sought to be the first one to get his hands on one. ( Also he was very intrigued and eager to known more about MC, but of course he'd never admit that. )

Belphie and Mammon both have piercings around their bodies. Mammon especially likes the golden and grey ones that match his rings, while Belphie prefers them black ( because of course he would ).

For the first 2-3 months of the exchange program, MC genuinely thought Diavolo and Lucifer were a couple. This happened because ever since day 1 they were hearing "funny comments" about the two of them and just assumed they were in an actual relationship. And no one ever bothered to correct them because they found it hilarious, and wanted to see how long it'd take for them to find out the truth. Some of the brothers even went as far as purposely making up stories to lead MC to believe that Lucifer was out on dates with Diavolo when he wasn't at home and they came looking for him ( and the bastards would immediately start laughing the moment MC left the room ). MC only found out the truth when they were talking to Lucifer about Diavolo one day and casually replied to something he said with "But that's not really surprising since he's your boyfriend" and Lucifer just went ???? "Excuse me?? What did you just say?" and proceeded to explain that he and Diavolo were in fact not in a relationship. ( the punishment he gave his brothers after finding out about this "little prank" of theirs was no joke, but none of them regretted it, it was "just too funny", in their own words )

Lucifer's voice changes DRASTICALLY depending on his mood. Like, the more serious/stressed he is, the deeper it goes, and the more relaxed/content he is, the softer it becomes. You can hear it cleary when you compare the way he sounds on a regular basis when lecturing the others, speaking about work, giving speeches as RAD's vice president, etc, to rare occasions when he's talking about music and art, playfully teasing the others, or recalling a nice moment from the past. It's like there are 3 stages to his voice: usual deep, furiously deep ( that iconic "Mammooon" ), and ACTUALLY SOFT. The ones who get to hear his "nice voice" the most are MC, Diavolo, Barbatos, Luke, and Beel.

One that's already been discussed by other players but that I'd like to add on: demons ( and angels as well ) give humans "uncanny valley feeling" and MC could tell there was something ""wrong"" with brothers ( they aren't humans ) the moment they first laid their eyes on them in the council room. And my addition to this is: although the brothers all give off this feeling, it's to varying degrees that depend on how much they can blend in as a human. And Satan is the only who can bypass this "filter" almost completely, because remember when Lucifer first introduced him by saying something along the lines of "He might look nice but don't fall for it because it's an act"? Well, I like to think that Satan also looks the most "normal" out of his brothers when it comes to the "uncanny valley feeling" because of this too, since he has pretty much mastered the art of appearing trusting to deceive humans back in the day and is still the best at disguising himself as human to not to scare people away when visiting the human world and such.

Solomon has a hobby of solving jigsaw puzzles, like, you know those huge ones that take over the entire table or floor? He absolutely loves them and will gladly spend a whole day focused on completing them if needed. And if you offer to solve one with him? Oh, he'll get so excited it's actually kind of adorable. So do it, it's the road to his heart, even if you find it boring.

Lucifer leaves Beel on charge whenever he has a work-related trip, or simply intends on spending more time out of the house than usual. It's easy, as long as the second youngest keeps everything in order, Lucifer promises to take him to any restaurant he wants ( no matter how expensive ), and to let him eat to his heart's content when he comes back. Oh, Mammon is trying to sneak out of the house to gamble all their money away? Nuh-uh, Beel's not letting him leave through that door! Asmo's planning to take advantage of the fact that Lucifer is out to throw a party? Nope, Beel's stopping him. Satan & Belphie are trying to get into Lucifer's room to prank him? Yeah nah, Beel's dragging them back to their own rooms. Really, it works wonders, not only because Beel has the most physical strength out of everyone and can overpower them, but also because none of them have the heart to actually argue with him.

#will I ever stop posting these? who knows #obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me nightbringer #omswd #omnb #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #☙ no creativity for names ✾

[brandogenius]

hii! just wanted to let you know that your work is incredible, i love reading everything you put out.

could you write some headcannons on jb with an anxious reader that’s maybe overwhelmed by everything that’s going on in her life? <33

THANK YOU SO MUCH!! oh my god you don’t know how happy that made me!! i’m so glad you like my work! i love your stuff as well, lovely! you’re work is immaculate *chefs kiss*

of course i can write that!

‼️RPF ‼️

HC - julien x anxious reader

- julien knows you suffer from anxiety and knows how to stop it before it gets worse

- julien has been able to notice when you’re spiralling / about to go into an anxiety attack. from scratching at your arms or running your hands over your collarbones / neck in an agitated manner she is quick to step in

- in public spaces it’s almost the same as well. you’d immediately grab onto juliens hand or hold onto the back of her coat / shirt as she guides both of you through the crowds to somewhere more quiet.

- big crowds were never your thing. claustrophobic if you will. it’ll make you panic and go into an anxiety attack so julien tries to avoid it as much as possible.

- “just hold onto my hand princess. you trust me right? i won’t let anything happen to you” and she sticks to her word.

- will try to find a quiet place for you to relax and calm yourself down

- getting anxious at home can be a bit more different opposed to in the public eye.

- you end up breaking down one night from an exam you’re studying in college. the pressure of your grades and the weight of the exam sits heavily in your stomach.

- julien was quick to notice. you hunched over the small desk in the corner. julien noticed you weren’t really studying more staring into space.

- not getting a reply from you, she was quick to place a hand on your shoulder. moving quickly into action.

- “c’mere baby, how about we rest for a bit? we can study together later”

- gathering you into her arms moving to the bed she bundles up together with you and the blankets

- unable to really form much words you just end up letting out tears. jb understand though. “take your time, let it all out”

- about of praise, reassurance too. you always need to be reassured. it helps ground you and bring you back

- “i love you so much baby. you’re doing so well”

- rubbing your back, hands in your hair, gentle kisses to your lips, cheek, nose, forehead everywhere.

- you end up tiring yourself out but calming down a bit more, feeling ready to talk to julien

- my god is she patient. you could be here all night refusing to talk and julien would be ok with it. she’d rather take all the time in the world to make sure you’re ok than you being uncomfortable or still anxious.

- jb knows what it’s like to have anxiety. the unsettling pit of dread and fear in your stomach. she wishes she could take it away from you.

- you end up having a heart to heart with julien for a couple of hours. sharing what made you upset.

- julien tries to help, asking what she can do to help you in the future, what can she improve.

- she knows these exams are taking a toll on your mental health. deciding once you’re finished the last of your exams she’ll treat you to a nice weekend away. some time together without the worry or fear of exams or in the public eye.

#pom writes #julien baker x reader #julien baker au #julien baker x fem!reader #julien baker one shot #julien baker fluff #julien baker fanfic #boygenius fanfic #boygenius one shot #boygenius x reader #boygenius au

[sun-roach]

Coruscant guards headcanons:

General headcanon:

They are an elite corps

They have to be the best of the best

They have to take care of Palpatine, senators, rioters, fugitives, bounty hunters, public safety, the prison, ghouls and other monsters in the lower levels, help out the GAR

The command line has a group chat that has very questionable content

They are understaffed

Rys:

(I don’t remember much of him, only that Yoda told him to get inspiration from his other brother’s)

Doesn’t like people

Keeps mostly to himself

Overcoming some trust issues

Doesn’t like to ask for help

Jek is his best friend and batchmate

Can’t drink

Sometimes clumsy

Jek:

(Like with Rys I don’t really remember him. I think Yoda told him to rely more on his brain instead of his weapon)

Straight forward/ blunt

Growing confidence

Loves his Z-6 rotary cannon

Explosions yay

Has never eaten a waffle

Doesn’t like massiffs

Sergeant Hound:

The actual baby

Loves animals

Has space tock and spacetagram for Grizzer

Very affectionate and caring

Can also be very strict and controlling

Protective af

Will show everyone his precious babies (the massiffs)

Patient af

Has dog snacks in his pockets. Always.

Cute laugh

Always proud when he makes someone else laugh

Offers pet therapy

Has a good nose

Sometimes very goofy

Lieutenant Thire:

The baby of the command line

Actually older than Fox and younger than Thorn

Tired

Tries to be more optimistic

Loves sleep

Very organized

Lawful good

Soft

Short hair cause it’s easier to handle unlike his life

Can sleep anywhere like a cat

Careful in everything he does

Yet gets injured very often

Shares a room with Stone, Thorn and Hound (they could have had their own rooms but they prefer to share)

Commander Stone:

Younger than Fox, older than Hound

Likes to be alone

Makes his own moonshine

Weird af humor no one understands

Doesn’t like to show his emotions

Actually dislikes caf but is forced to drink it

Makes holos whenever he is not on coruscant and sends them into the corrie group chat

A good photograph

Likes rock and metal

Commander Thorn:

Older than Fox

A menace to everyone

Likes to fool around but will be serious if needed

Big heavy guns cause big dick energy

Loves sarcasm and irony

Funny depressed

A Thor fanboy

dyed his hair blond and grew it a bit out

Smart but likes to act dumb smt

Makes the worst caf

Good friend

loves to drink

Probably a taylor swift fan

Commander Fox:

Marshal commander

Was in a batch with Wolffe, Cody, Rex, Ponds, Bly

Wolffe is his older twin

Tired depressed

Insomnia

Refuses or has no time to sleep until he gets sedated

Gifted kid burnout

A good soldier

Dark humor

Sly and smart

Thinks outside the box to get the best results

Thorn's caf destroyed his taste buds

Protective af

Loves his vode sm

Hard shell, soft core

Force sensitive without knowing

Blackouts

Vode killer

Knows everything about Coruscant and could walk blindly trough it

Tormented/ scarred soul

Has his own room for various reasons

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My corrie ocs:

Corrie chief medic Patcher:

He is Ori'vod™️

Was in a batch with Neyo, Bacara and Gree

Loves blue milk

Will patch up anyone and anything

Russian cursive handwriting no one can read

Scars everywhere (literally)

Has several medics under his wing

Lost one eye (it got replaced by a cybernetic one) and dyed the other red

Intimidating af

Trust issues

Will break your bones if it means u heal faster

Protective af

The only one allowed to give Fox medical treatments

Does therapy sessions for his brothers

Can’t smile

Stitch:

Rainbow squads actual baby

Anxious medic

Curious

His face is full of stitches

Soft and gentle

Can appear very calm despite being not

Loves flowers

Out grew his hair a bit

Likes studying

Caring

Smt very tired of his squad (he loves them)

Tea > caf

Sticker:

Rainbow squads baby

Always optimistic and positive

Adventurous

Has no sense of orientation

Loves tooka and shows ppl random tooka holos

ARC

Very smart but also very naive

Can’t sit still

Loves to tinker and engineer or invent stuff

Laid back

Risk blind

Clingy and sticks to people

Cuyan:

Lost his former battalion, went into jail and ended up joining the corries

Pessimistic

Trust issues

Half of his body is burnt

Depressed

Doesn’t know how to show affection

Would rather eat a hamster than admit that he loves his new squad

Sees no point in anything but will live for his squad

Can’t taste anything unless it’s very very extremely spicy or sour or sweet

Redd:

Loves red

A thief

Will steal not only your heart

Sniper

ARC

Flirtatious

Loyal af

Got tortured

Lowkey has an alcohol problem

Looks always good

Good eyes

Easy going

Loves to mess around and break some rules

Tattoos on one of his leg

Tongue piercing

Sergeant Strife:

Loves astronomy

Has a solar system tattooed on his back

K’oyacyi tatt under his eye

Loves harmony

Will solve any problem with his fists

Has a secret boyfriend which is not really a secret

Likes to sew and crochet for all the corries

The only one who can cook a little

Buir of his squad

Has a beard

Serves directly under Thorn

#coruscant guard #commander fox #commander thorn #commander stone #lieutenant thire #sergeant hound #clone trooper rys #clone trooper jek #corrie chief medic patcher #oc: patcher #rainbow squad #star wars #tcw #sw tcw #sw oc #the clone wars #cc 1010 #headcanons #corrie headcanons #i am so tired #but i luv them #corries deserved better #they r a silly bunch

[fragmentsofmyfixation]

The Woes of Being a Butler (Father)

Pairing: Bruce Wayne x Clark Kent

Word Count: 1,750

Warnings: None 

Summary: Master Bruce in his 27 years of life had never been what one would refer to as social. He hardly spoke to anyone that wasn’t Alfred or Detective Gordon which is why when Alfred finds him preparing to go out, he’s curious.

 Alfred was suspicious. Master Bruce had never been one for social gatherings, or anything social period. He had always been a rather recluse child, something which only intensified after the death of his parents. Alfred was a military man who learned the ways of service after his time in British intelligence. He never had a chance to be a father. So when he was left to parent a traumatized young boy, he was clueless as to how to bring him out from this dark place that seemed to be swallowing him from the inside out.

He had tried cajoling the young boy to socialize with his peers but was met with icy rebuffs and anxious tears. He had hoped that Master Bruce’s years abroad would have helped him with his social anxiety, but he still shied away from making social connections and avoided public gatherings like the plague. This is why Alfred was at a loss when watching Master Bruce change his outfit for the fourth time tonight.

Seeing him in anything aside from his sleepwear and full Batman regalia was a sight for sore eyes. Alfred shook his head in bemusement as Master Bruce carded nervous fingers through his hair in a vain attempt to fix his bed head, eye his outfit with disgust, and then go into the closet to change once again. Alfred couldn’t stand by and say nothing.

“Any plans for tonight Master Bruce?”

Master Bruce dropped whatever he was holding, surprised by Alfred’s presence. He must have been deep inside his own head to not notice Alfred’s presence.

Yes, something was amiss indeed.

“Just out,” he replied, voice soft, eyes downturned.

Alfred wasn’t letting this go. “Yes, I can see that, what I’m asking is who your plans are with and what you will be doing. Is this for business? It wasn’t on your schedule.”

While Alfred couldn’t see the look on his face, Alfred knew it was flushing red from his lack of response.

Master Bruce came out from his hiding space closet with a look of nervous confidence.

Having built up enough courage Master Bruce blurted out, “I’m seeing a friend.”

Alfred’s mind stopped at the abrupt declaration before he composed himself once again.

“A friend?”

“Yes, a friend Alfred,” Master Bruce replied instantly.

Ah that type of friend.

“Does this friend happen to go by the name Selena Kyle?”

“No,” he answered immediately. “It’s someone else.”

“Excuse me for my rudeness but I was unaware you had actual friends, considering how your time is spent between searching for justice, avoiding the press, conversing with me, and sneakily trying to hide your food so I won’t force you to eat. I’m just surprised is all.”

Bruce fiddled with his tie —a nervous tick Alfred had noticed— without looking at him.

“It was that reporter, the one who came her for an interview a few months ago.”

Alfred dug up a name in his memories till he was able to match it with a face. Yes, he remembered that reporter, Clark Kent. He had hand picked him to interview Master Bruce because of his stellar record capturing the importance of the person he was interviewing and writing genuine articles instead of writing ludicrous headlines to sell tabloids. Master Bruce had refused stating that he didn’t want to be interviewed.

Stop being such a ninny Master Bruce it’s only an interview.

Bruce had only agreed at the promise of Alfred not bothering him about his sleep schedule —or lack thereof— for a week.  

It’s the small victories Alfred supposes.

The day he had come to the manor, was the day right after Master Bruce had fallen from a rooftop, making his mood even more withdrawn. Mister Kent’s charm had managed to pull a few reluctant half smiles out of Master Bruce. All was going well till Mister Kent noticed the bruising on his torso when the hem of Master Bruce’s shirt had risen up as he reached for a mug.

Mister Kent’s worry seemed genuine when he asked if Master Bruce was alright. His face was stricken with panic as he apologized for coming over when he was hurt and insisting that Bruce should have canceled the interview.

“You came here from Metropolis Mr. Kent, cancelling at last minute would have been inappropriate. I’ve already iced the bruise and have been banned from rock climbing by my butler.”

“Your health trumps our interview. I could’ve done a phone interview from my hotel. Seriously Mr. Wayne, you need to pay better attention to your health!”

Alfred remembered the memory fondly, the sight of Bruce feeling properly chagrined and having a regular conversation, with someone his age no less had made Alfred’s year.

However, it seemed that the status of their relationship had changed, and while Alfred respected and approved of him as a reporter and possible friend, he wanted to know what his intentions were with Master Bruce. And he also abhorred being blindsided like this.

“Have you two been keeping in touch?” Alfred asked, voice devoid of any emotion.

Master Bruce seemed to sense Alfred’s tone and answered cautiously. “Well, at first, he sent a follow up email with his article attached and asked how my bruises were healing. I know you’re always telling me how genuine compliments and nice conversation are the keys to the beginning of friendship so I complimented him on the article. It was well written and didn’t have anything I told him not to write in it.”

Alfred nodded, remembering the well written article and how impressed he was.

“After that we continued to exchange emails and he sent me one last week saying he was in Gotham and asked if he could take me out,” Master Bruce said, getting quieter towards his last admission.

“And when were you going to tell me this?” Alfred asked, hurt seeping into his usual sarcastic tone.

Master Bruce looked chagrined at the disappointment leaking into his voice and ducked his head sorrowfully. “It’s not that I wanted to hide it Alfred. I just..” he struggled to find the words, “I just didn’t know if it would last and didn’t want to disappoint you. I know how happy you were when I met Selina and conversely how sad you were when we didn’t work out and I was alone again. I just didn’t want to disappoint you with another failed relationship.”

Another failed attempt at happiness. Is what went unsaid.

The hardness in Alfred’s face softened. His ward was truly one of a kind.

“I’m assuming you’ve ran a background check on the lad before agreeing to go out with him?” Alfred questioned ignoring the charged atmosphere.

Sadness was replaced by cockiness as he replied, “Of course I did, I’m Batman. And I’m sure you ran a background check before scheduling the interview.”

Alfred acquiesced to his point and looked at his ward lovingly. Hesitance crept back into Master Bruce’s expression, seemingly thinking Alfred was still upset with him.

Instead of responding with words that would make them both overly emotional, he decided to give some much needed fashion advice.

“I suggest going with the white turtleneck, a leather jacket, and black slacks,” Alfred advised before leaving the room.

Alfred was reading over Gotham Gazette’s newest paper when he heard the doorbell ring. Before he could stand up to answer it Master Bruce had raced down the stairs, checking his hair one last time in the living room mirrors before approaching the door.

Alfred smiled in his tea at his ward’s thinly concealed excitement. He got up and put on a pejorative mask. He was just in time to see Master Bruce open the door. Mister Kent had brought a bouquet of an admittedly beautiful assortment of flowers.

“Hi,” Clark greeted timidly.

“Hi,” Master Bruce replied bashfully.

“Greetings,” Alfred interrupted standing between the two. Both men were startled out of their bubble. Bruce seemed mortified, cheeks flushing red for the third time tonight. Clark held out his hand in greeting.

“It’s nice to see you again Mr. Pennyworth.”

Alfred didn’t spare at a glance at the outstretched hand and replied, “I wish I could say the same. I wasn’t aware you took a romantic interest in Master Bruce.”

Master Bruce whispered an embarrassed “Alfred!” before apologizing profusely to Mister Kent.  

The reporter laughed, seemingly unperturbed.

“It didn’t start off that way. I was genuinely concerned with his recovery. Then we started talking and while Bruce’s replies were a bit…” he paused searching for the right words. “Stilted at first, I was enamored with his quick wit and straightforward personality. I knew it was a long shot asking him out, I’m sure he has potential suitors knocking down doors for the chance to take him out.”

As Mister Kent continued talking, both Master Bruce and Alfred collectively decided not to mention how he’s barely even seen outside of the house, let alone propositioned.

“But my ma always tells me, ‘Clark, you’ll never know if you don’t try’ so I decided to give it a shot and  felt like the luckiest man on earth when I read Bruce’s email agreeing to a date.”

Master Bruce leaned back on his heels as he fiddled with the hem of his turtleneck, another nervous tick of his.

“You see Alfred, Clark’s nice,” Master Bruce defended, cheeks bright red, eyes staring in admiration at the reporter.

Alfred internally rolled his eyes at the sight before him. What would those residing in the underbelly of Gotham, think of the scary Batman, the force of vengeance and justice that tears through Gotham’s most dangerous streets like paper every night, blushing like a love-sick teenage girl, wooed by a reporter’s country charm.  

Alfred still wasn’t completely sold on Mister Kent, but decided to give his approval, for now.

“Have him home by 11.”

“I’m 27 Alfred, I don’t have a curfew,” he stated indignantly.

Alfred didn’t reply and gave him a nonplussed look. Master Bruce seemed to realize he was serious and leaned close enough to whisper something in his ear.

“12:30 tops Alfred, please?”

Alfred could hear the pout in his voice and resigned himself to tracking their whereabouts in the bat cave if he wasn’t home at 12:30 on the dot.

“Alright lad, have fun.”

Master Bruce gave a small smile before joining Mister Kent to his car. Alfred shut the door and smiled to himself, his ward was finally growing up. The deceased Masters would be proud.

#robbert pattinson #batman #superbat #batman2022 #alfred pennyworth #batfamily #overprotective #bruce wayne #dc comcis #clark kent #superman #battinson

[kaeyx]

anon who suggested demon beastzai here again !! meeting demon beastzai probably consists of months withstanding very very strange things happening wherever you go and even more so within your house. from lights flashing off and on, scratch marks on the wall, your stuff going missing, things being misplaced…. im not sure how reader and demon beastzai would even meet but i would think after you did, he got hooked on you immediately therefore the weird things start happening

it isnt until he actually makes himself FULLY known to you does he start showing up in front of you with little to no regards of your comfort, im sorry you just have a new roommate !! no takesies backsies !! he lingers behind you randomly , wrapping his arms around him and dotes on you. sure maybe he messes you with and maybe it’s a lot but it’s nothing too serious!!! yet. yet at least. unless youre so insistent on getting rid of him but you dont really have the power to actually do so, so he plays with you lightly <3

oh and he totally watches you take baths or showers, he’s like a cat he will follow you into every room. and let him nuzzle you while he holds you in bed wont you? no he won’t let you outside that much anymore, if you need something he can just order someone to get it for you ! he has a lot of power you know ? why would you need to go outside without him? if you really want to that badly, he supposes he could shapeshift into a human form but he’d really rather stay at home with you.

also going back to what someone said abt the demons faking that they have heats/ruts YOU CANNOT TELL ME THAT DOES NOT HAVE DEMON BEASTZAI ALL OVER IT. HE WOULD DEFINITELY DO THIS…. just hearing him whine while he buries his face into your neck and he presses against you, practically humping you and hes just complaining about how painful this rut is for him !!! even the strongest demons have their weaknesses, youre the only person who can help him :(( he cant go to anyone else

I also don't know how demon Beastzai would come around to be honest.... he just pops up and decides to stay. The closest explanation I can come up with is he's some sort of lord/ruler in the underworld? That could serve as substitute for the PM, but I'm not too concerned about logistics I want the vibes. Somehow, someway, Beastzai decides he's your new roommate and now refuses to leave. Even worse if you live in a little studio apartment, because it's impossible to keep your distance or have any personal space. He'll sit with you, sneak into your bed, poke his head into the bathroom while you're showering, and nothing you do or say will stop him.

Beastzai also refuses to let you leave! He can magic groceries and takeout into your hands, you can shop and order stuff online, why would you ever have to step foot outside? If you complain about being confined to such a small space he'll offer to bring you back home with him, but of course that "home" isn't anywhere in this plane of existence. If you insist on going outside he shapeshifts into a hauntingly beautiful man, his dark fur turning into a dark coat, claws turning into long, nimble fingers. If the light hits his eye just right you swear it looks red. And he holds your hand everywhere you go, of course. Doctors' office, grocery store, he'll even hang off your arm while you're trying to work, exercise, go to class... And he'll be whining constantly about going back inside. He's got a million excuses: pollen, the sun hurts his eyes, he doesn't like getting wet, it's too hot, it's too cold, people make him anxious... It's neverending. And god forbid you have to take public transport, he'll hug you from behind, rest his chin on your shoulder, and glower at anyone who tries to stand close to you until they get off.

As for how he'd look, I have a few ideas but he's mostly the same as regular Demonzai. Big, tall, not buff just broad shouldered, horns and fangs and big claws. Lots of dark brown/black fur especially on his stomach and back. Maybe slit pupils? Yellow or red eyes, perhaps a forked tongue. He might even have backwards knees like animals do, generally I imagine him as part goat with some monster features added. If you strip him naked there won't be a lot of difference between Beast Demonzai and normal Demonzai imo, maybe a few more scars on Beastzai.

Also OUGJSVJDKVJD YES HE FAKES HIS RUTS ALL THE TIMEEEE he gets extra clingy and puts his hands all over you and whines pathetically, humping your leg and crying about how painful it is, walking naked around the house because he's "overheating" and conveniently letting you see every inch of him... And much like regular Demonzai he's not opposed to straight up holding you down and taking what he wants, or using you in your sleep.

#dazai.bsd #demon!dazai #demon!beast!dazai #beastzai.bsd

[suzyq31]

Example of what Harmony authors face

Hi,

I know a lot of you who follow me or are mutuals in this space are more Jily writers/readers. But I just want to share an example of the reasons I'm no longer comfortable engaging in the main Harmony fandom space run by HMS Harmony. I'll be blocking and deleting this user/commenter. I did however want to post this here as a concrete example of why it is that I'm not eager to continue and will be focusing on writing other pairings.

Also want to reiterate that I am not against discussion of fics, I just think entire post dedicated to talking about what we dislike about a fic in public fandom spaces don't adhere to a culture of kindness or respect. Fandom is about having fun, engaging with something we all love. That doesn't mean we all have to like the same things. But I also think we can do better about treating each other decently. I have not sent a single person after this user, or to attack any moderators of these groups. But again, this is the response and while I haven't been there to see it, I do know that I'm being dragged on there. Which does make me afraid to speak up, but sometimes we have to do things or speak up even when we feel anxious about further retaliation.

One last thing about fandom culture/critique. I saw a post on here that I'll try to find again that basically said that fics aren't a meal at a restaurant where you pay and specify what you want. They are more like a home cooked meal. If you don't like it that's fine, don't eat it, but you also don't need to throw it back in the person's face. So anyways, this wasn't the best way to start my morning but I'm going to focus on the positives in my life, like going to a job where I get to plan Harry Potter themed activities for kids ❤️ Hope you all have a lovely day!

The comment can be viewed below:

Let me say this as clearly as possible and hope you don’t construe this as disrespect for the sake of disrespect.

Get over yourself. Really, do that.

Your entire author note is self contradictory to the point that it makes me laugh. You said it wasn’t meant to cast blame but you posted the link to the thread I made on reddit. You said you don’t always expect the internet to be a safe space yet you’re trying to make it that way by not only brigading your friends and supporters against the mods but making an author note to air your own grievances about a thread that did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to rip apart publicly and regularly.

If you think I’ve ripped apart BFL with that thread then I shudder to think what you’ll think when you see something actually being ripped apart. What I did was voice my confusion and frustration at not being able to understand what that story was trying to accomplish. What I did was seek out others to either see if they felt the same or see if they felt different to me. You conveniently ignored that latter part.

And now you’re giving yourself time and grace to make a decision on what you want to do in the fandom. So with all due respect again, GET OVER YOURSELF. You post a work into a public space and expect it not to be critically discussed? The absolute worst thing I could have done was “RiP aPaRt” BFL directly in Emerson’s thread but I didn’t. Instead I went to reddit and sought out others in the community to try and understand. The fact that she ended up seeing that and then announcing that she’s leaving the fandom just to put heat on me is crazy but I’ll let it slide.

I honestly do not know what I could have done better other than shutting my mouth and saying nothing but the truth is that I was a fan of the author and I absolutely refused to believe the story she put out was what it was. Do I regret offering up a discussion on Reddit? Hell no. I wanted to understand so I sought understanding.

Another contradiction. You said you were no God but you are a human but yet you’re asking others to change the subreddit to what you 🫵 want it to be. You want it to be changed to an echo chamber where sensitive people like you won’t be exposed to criticism or discussion of your work. The same bloody work you posted on a public site to hundreds, thousands, of readers. Give me a break.

If you’re so afraid of negativity, as you call it, then may I suggest a policy of perhaps not being on Reddit and not seeking out posts that discuss your work? It’s either that or get over yourself and roll with the punches.

Discussion isn’t always going to be complimentary or kind. If your work is controversial, best believe it will be discussed. And make no mistake, I DISCUSSED BFL. Never once did I levy harsh accusations or insults just because I didn’t like the story. The fact that it has 41 upvotes and counting echoes that. So many people agree with me and I love it. I think that’s what Reddit is about. Promoting discussion and understanding of things.

Once again, please either get over yourself or adopt the fanfic author’s sacred mantra: “Don’t like, don’t read.” You don’t like the way your work is read and discussed, then leave. Join a new subreddit that is the echo chamber you want it to be. Or even leave the fandom like your friend Emerson did. Join the Dramione community because apparently their subreddit is better than Harmony’s according to all yous. Or even join the Nevmione subreddit, I’m sure they could use a few more authors and are “nicer” than Harmony.

Make a note of how stupid and unfair it sounds when I tell you to do all of those things. Make a note of how you feel when I say them. And then ask yourself why “don’t like, don’t read” is a bullshit rule. You can’t just decide to fully dislike a story without reading it all the way through. Stories get better and they win you over as you read them. The fact that BFL didn’t do that after I read it 8 odd times is a testament to me trying to find some positives because that is who I am..

That being said, continue to give yourself time and grace after you read this. Give yourself both of those things which, honestly, could have saved BFL if Harry was given some of it.

#harry potter fanfic #harry x hermione #harry/hermione #harmony fanfic #harmony #toxic fandom

[auniverseforgotten]

A FOURTH SHIP JOINS THE FLEET FOR THE SHIP ASK: Fionn/Diarmud (in whatever way you choose to interpret this)

oh look the one I'm most anxious to do in fear that I'll have bad takes and get a bad grade in shipping asZDfxcgvh

who’s the cuddler: 

The one thing I want for these two is to just fucking TOUCH. I WANT THEM TO HUG. I WANT THEM TO HUG EACH OTHER SO CLOSE BECAUSE SO MUCH BAD SHIT HAS HAPPENED AND THEY ARE EACH OTHER'S ROCKS

Anyway on that note I'm not sure if either of them come off as conventionally cuddly; Fionn I think is all about casual touches and being in Diarmuid's space and Diarmuid is 100% okay with that. But I do think he's a little more reticent in public? But in private he is absolutely cuddling up to Fionn.

Like these two love each other, okay? I don't care what typemoon says, I don't care what the pursuit says, I care about what all the other mythos says and everything Tea has ever said about them ever. So just....little kisses on hands/anywhere on the face/top of head/etc, holding onto each other [tho Fionn may be the one who initiates in public]

Note that the not as into PDA thing that Diarmuid has goes out the window if it's another Fey, any one from that realm comes up and Diarmuid has his arm around Fionn Immediately because Territorial.

But I just....want them to be soft with each other and hug and hold hands and braid each other's hair SO THAT'S WHAT THEY DO OKAY

who makes the bed:

I can't really see Diarmuid caring about it so I'm gonna say Fionn.

who wakes up first:

Uhhh I think like. When anything is going on [mythos, demon pillars, lostbelts] they are both very light sleepers who are up with the dawn and ready and prepared, but if it's a lighter event or just...if they somehow get peace After all of this, I feel like Diarmuid might wake up normally but just refuse to get up and cling to Fionn who's like "alright spending the day in bed"

who has the weird taste in music:

Again I don't see it as weird taste but while Diarmuid has been summoned more, I feel like Fionn would try and explore more types of music either because he genuinely enjoys them or because he told Medb over breakfast that some random genre she was hating on was his most beloved, actually, yes he can name five albums-

who is more protective:

HA HA HA BOTH

My god these two go. Nuclear. Like there are a few base kinda things [also taken from Tea's HCs and fics no one is surprised]:

Diarmuid tends to be more cautious/wary or outright afraid around female casters, so anytime they're dealing with one of those Fionn is absolutely glued to his side. Because I do operate on The Pursuit having happened bcus I'm addicted to angst, just that it happened Differently. He's also uncomfortable around women in general [at least at first and it doesn't go away if they are a caster] so Fionn is Always with him unless he can't be.

Similarly, given Diarmuid's death via boar or other accident [though originally he survives all that and goes into mountain sleep too], Fionn is NOOOOOOT okay if he finds out Diarmuid is fighting those. Has 110% gotten between one and Diarmuid before, has absolutely been the cause of an argument before.

And for Fionn, once again everything Tea has ever said aka Diarmuid is really protective around people who are trying to take advantage over the fact that Fionn is a bleeding heart. Whenever someone comes up with their sob story Diarmuid is There and not buying it.

AND THEN ALSO GENERALLY just...just don't fuck with them. Because as soon as you fuck with one of them you've fucked with both, RIP you.

who sings in the shower:

I'm gonna say Fionn here because Diarmuid in life had to be really careful about things like singing, emotion, etc. because of the effect Fey can have on humans [like making them die of loneliness after hearing their song etc.] and even though he's a servant now that baked in caution isn't going away. Fionn would probably try and get him to sing with him though.

who cries during movies:

Both of them for animal movies, specifically any movie with dogs.

who spends the most while out shopping:

Diarmuid 110% -slaps his head- this boy can fit SO MUCH EXPENSIVE TASTE INSIDE Fionn will look at receipts of thousands and thousands and be like 'oh you didn't spend as much as usual' he just ENJOYS THE FINER THINGS and GOOD FOR HIM.

who kisses more roughly:

I feel like they're the type to make a game out of it, so both.

who is more domineering:

Again I feel like they both can be at times. Sometimes things call for gentleness, sometimes roughness. Just depends.

my rating of the ship from 1-10: 

11/10 I will never forgive you for making me brainrot so hard about them TEA [this is a joke thank you for having such good fionndiar posts and platonic ones too and just for being super cool]

THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE ASK WOLFIEEEE ask meme here

#solar screams #solar writes #THANKS WOLFIE #ask game #fgo #fionn mac cumhaill #diarmuid ua duibhne #fionndiar

[dutifullyshamelessearthquake]

The more I think about a Cyno being a slightly anxious puker the more I like it lol. Like not quite Emetophobic? i mean he doesn’t like throwing up ofc but the part that gets him is the fear of inconveniencing others or Tighnari. And so much of this you’ve already captured in your work! He will camp in the bathroom or try to clean up his own mess if he’s made one…and the thought of being sick *in public* absolutely not. Not an option. Do not perceive him.

Tighnari is the first and probably only person he’s made an exception for, and a lot of it is him working on being okay with taking up space

(am I projecting? I’ll never tell.)

NO BUT SAME THOUGH, I LOVE THIS!

This wasn't the direction I was planning on going with Cyno's character when I first started writing him, but that's somehow where we ended up and I love it. You're so right here!! I didn't even realise this, but a perfect example of what you're saying, is when he gets sick in the fic "Cup of tea." Cyno didn't wake Tighnari up when he got sick in the night, he just silently went to camp out on the bathroom floor alone. And when Tighnari later tried to take him back to bed he refused, and even slept on the floor by the toilet for the remainder of the night.

I absolutely love this so much, it feels perfect for his character and I definitely want to keep this. Poor Cyno, not necessarily being afraid of throwing up, but being so afraid of making a mess somewhere- I can't even imagine if he does get sick in public, it would be a whole different level of anxiety for him.

Ahhh thank you for the thoughts, I'm going to be thinking about this for hours I absolutely love it

#earthquake author's note #sickfic #genshin sickfic #genshin emeto #emeto

[brandwhorestarscream]

Hmm. Pharma or Rodimus or Ravage. I think you've covered most of my other faves.

PRAISE THE GODS, YOU'RE AN ANGEL

So! I actually do have quite a bit done for Rodimus, actually! He was born to an unwilling warframe surrogate early into the planet's reformation. His parents that raised him, neither of them could bear sparklings thanks to the war, so they turned to warframe surrogacy. Because Rodimus was born "of high quality", i.e. a civilian frame with blue optics (a high quality baby would come to mean smthn entirely different later), they were allowed to fully and completely adopt him, and he was raised entirely ignorant to the fact that his carrier wasn't actually his carrier.

He's very young, all things considered, when he's named a Prime. Optimus can feel the Matrix straining to separate itself from him, demanding a new host, though he doesn't know if it's because he's no longer up to its' standards, or if it's just another's fate to carry on the legacy of the Primes at this point. He's surprised when the Matrix selects this young mecha barely out of his secondary education program, and Hot Rod is even moreso. He's a perfectly normal, average child growing up in the first generation born to post-war Cybertron: he lives in a quiet middle class neighborhood with his two parents, and has zero interest in politics or powers. But suddenly he's getting dragged off to central Iacon for a fancy ceremony, flanked by bodyguards and attendants and a dozen coaches all telling him what he can and can't do, how to act, and that he's going to be working closely with the Senate and communing with the gods from now on. It's drastically uncomfortable, it's terrifying, and he hates it. He wants no part of it but he can't refuse: against his will, he's named Rodimus Prime, and moved into the Primal palace-estate-thingy.

Being a Prime comes with a whole slew of new privileges, including a team of attendants and staff that he owns. Warframes born in the same facilities as him, in the same circumstances, but forced to serve him as their master without a single question or care as to what they want. The whole thing makes him anxious and sick, and no matter how loudly he insists that he doesn't want them, no one will hear him. He spends the next several vorns shut up in this beautiful prison, only really invited outside for public appearances to be gawked at and for uppity ceremonies where he's called to "hear the words of the gods". The Matrix is a heavy, invasive weight in his chassis, and he doesn't at all feel like the wise or all knowing beacon of hope that he's supposed to be.

During his time in the Primal residency, he makes friends with his staff. His... slaves. The word makes him nauseous, and he forbids them from using it in his presence. Overtime they slowly get used to each other, comfortable, and they start talking to him. He learns all about them, how they're all vibrant individuals with their own personalities and wants and desires, and no amount of insistence from outside forces that they're little more than drones can get to him. He comes to care about them, every single one--they're all his beloved friends and he'd go to war for any one of the.

Eventually, fond feelings begin to blossom and he finds himself desperately in love with one of them. He hatches a plan to escape, to get them all off the planet, cooking up some grand lie about the Matrix calling him off planet. Go forth into the universe, find more places where Cybertron's seeds can take root, expand our empire and grow more colonies. It's a grand televised event, everyone worldwide watching as their Prime sets off in the Lost Light on a quest sent to him from Primus Himself.

The transwarp drive malfunctions, and the ship explodes just as it's initiating the first jump.

The ship's signal is lost. It can't be tracked or reached on the comms. Rodimus Prime is declared dead after a lengthy search, and the Matrix is lost to space. He's globally mourned, and the next mech declared a Prime can't truly fulfil their entire purpose, but that little fact is swept under the rug by the Senate.

In reality, Rodimus orchestrated the entire thing, and as soon as they arrive to their first destination, Rodimus helps each and every member of crew berid of the brands that marked them as property, removing his own autobot badge and declaring them all free and equal. Now the Lost Light is travelling freely through the universe, it's crew close as family, each of them so grateful to have their lives under their own control at last.

...

Holy shit this got long lmaooo. To avoid making this 8 billion words, I'll post Pharma and Ravage separately! I hope you enjoyed ^-^

#rodimus #hot rod #the repopulation project #this is entirely unbeta'd so please forgive my fuck ups

[isfjmel-phleg]

Will MacIntyre doesn't cry. Ever. And this is intended to be worrisome.

(Okay, I know he doesn't fit with the other boys I've been discussing--he's a young adult, not a teenager--but the themes are there. Bear with me.)

Even though we meet Will as an adult, there are multiple flashbacks to his childhood. He's been through a lot. Unstable home. Friendless background. A mother whom he feels he needs to protect. Frequently absent father whom he comes to believe is a supervillain (actually just a run-of-the-mill henchman) and who ends up getting sent to prison. And then taking on the burden of reinventing himself as his father's complete opposite.

Billy Mac (a childhood nickname that the adult Will is anxious to keep hushed up) is only eight. But his response to everything he goes through is eerily unchildlike.

(Triumph #3)

He is utterly unemotional, both in public and private. It's not that he isn't feeling anything; the lasting impact of his past confirms that he was hurt pretty badly by all this. Shutting off emotion has been a deliberate choice for him from a worryingly early age. He has figured out that he can't afford to be vulnerable, that there's danger within his own house, and he must do everything he can to keep himself and his mother safe.

So he doesn't cry. He doesn't show a sign of being upset about anything, ever, even when his mother is in tears as his father is escorted away to prison. The script for Triumph emphasizes how closed off he is:

"Grim. No trace of sadness. Just a heartbreaking acceptance of the way things are."

"Stoic, accepting"

"Emotionless"

"Stoic. Staring out into space."

"Glaring eyes. Not one trace of innocence."

(Triumph #1, 3)

And he grows into an adult who maintains this strategy. He presents a front of arrogant over-competence that conceals the insecurities and hurts evident in his inner monologue. Even at times when one might expect a more emotive reaction of him, Will is aloof. Reencountering his father for the first time since their parting in the courtroom? Once again, the script specifies that he is "stoic. Holding it in" and "shows no apparent emotion," despite all the resentment he's been harboring.

(Triumph #4)

And his solo ends with him in much the same position that he was in as an eight-year-old--abandoned by his father and as alone and emotionless as ever.

Breaking his back and experiencing the intense pain and paralysis that kicks in whenever his powers aren't on to avert the affects doesn't get a tear out of him.

(...or maybe once? This panel, in which the heightened gravity of an alien planet causes him to collapse in pain, is a bit ambiguous.)

(Justice League Task Force #33)

Neither does he break down about damaged relationships, or being confronted with the consequences of his actions that have left him "broken, bitter, and alone." He can't bring himself to succumb to emotion, even in private. Much easier to want to hit a reset button on the lost ten years of his life, at the expense of his soul, than to deal with everything he's not allowing himself to feel.

And in the end, he's got nothing left to feel with.

(Justice League Task Force #37)

Unlike Kon or Tim, who tend to hold back their tears but still can't avoid breaking down at particularly emotionally fraught moments, Will flatly refuses to acknowledge sorrow at all. He rejects opportunities to learn vulnerability that would allow him to get in touch with his humanity. Thus, he ultimately denies himself the full human experience, which leaves him empty inside, unable to grow or meaningfully relate to others. (Even his acts of apparent self-sacrifice are motivated by concern for his own reputation, as he admits to a teammate whose life he once saved.)

It would have been good for him to break down at least once. It would have opened up a chance to start to process everything he has bottled up. But after years of fortifying the impenetrable walls he put up to protect himself as a child, this unhealthy coping mechanism is so ingrained into him that he cannot let it go. And in the end, that's all he'll have left.

#comicsposting again #WM: broken bitter and alone #this perhaps isn't a genre that one would expect to be saying #that refusing to deal with your emotions is ultimately bad for you and eats away at your soul #but that is indeed a theme of this tragedy! #(I reread/skimmed all of Will's material for this and am having Emotions about it again so there may be more analysis forthcoming) #(thank you for your patience with me as I lose my mind about obscure characters)

[yanderes-galore]

Hello can you do a yandre lady bella/Mary please 🥺

Of course! Darling takes over the role of 'Trusted Maid' mentioned in her backstory.

Yandere! Lady Bella! Mary Concept

Possible Trigger Warnings: Yandere behavior, Possessive behavior, Obsessive behavior, Manipulation, Clingy behavior, Slight sadism, Exhibitionist behavior, Forced partnership/relationship, Forced romantic actions, PDA, Threats, Attempted murder, Blood mention.

- Madame Bella is a talented yet arrogant actress.

- She's met many people and has a temper that spikes at odd times.

- Other than her unique quirks, she is an actress many adore in the theatrical scene.

- She even has a servant who accompanies her daily.

- She could never be seen away from you for long.

- Often throwing fits when you weren't near her or getting her ready for her day.

- "(Y/N)! Where were you? I need my makeup and hair done.... You were preparing my meal...? You could've told me!"

- Madame Bella is Clingy, Possessive, Manipulative, and Needy towards you when you work for her.

- She won't take anything from anyone else other than you.

- You must give her food and water.

- You must clothe and prepare her for her plays.

- It all must be you or it simply won't do!

- The director even said you had to stay outside for rehearsal one time, only for Madame Bella to throw a fit.

- The actress always wants her arms around your waist and you beside her.

- She even gets anxious when she sees you aren't near her in some way.

- "Darling? I want my darling.... (Y/N) must stay until I'm done! I refuse to act without (Y/N)!"

- Madame Bella would also have a poor sense of personal space when it comes to you.

- Often kissing your cheek/lips or hugging you as a thank you for helping her.

- Are people looking?

- Then she'll give them a show if they're so nosy!

- Madame Bella probably would be some sort of exhibitionist.

- Openly showing affection to you in public while being so very innocent about it.

- Her servant's taken.

- No one else can have you.

- "Unwind into my kiss, will you, dear? I don't care if they watch. It only shows you're mine!"

- Madame Bella is a quick one to show she means business.

- Turning borderline sadistic when she sees someone trying to make a move on you.

- Her temper sets off and she's luring said person into a private room.

- Only for a secret blade to be pressed to their neck, blue eyes holding a darkness within them despite her pretty pink getup.

- They have nerve to touch what's hers....

- "My servant is just that, MINE. Get your unworthy hands off of what's mine...."

- Madame Bella is a natural actress.

- She's talented in deception because of this.

- Just know that she isn't just some pretty actress dressed in pink that likes you a little too much.

- She's dangerous and ready to strike if anyone tempts her to do so...

- All so she can keep you to herself as her most trusted servant.

- "The longer I'm with you, the more I adore you. You can't leave me now, I'll promise you that, darling! Even if blood must be spilled to keep you...."

#yandere identity v #yandere idv #yandere idv bloody queen #idv yandere bloody queen #yandere lady bella #yandere madame bella

[unrelatabledude]

THE GREAT OC ROUND UP!!!!

I might make this two parts orz because of the images but i finally!! got some basic stuff down about my most important ocs. Trust me, I could post the huge group pics too but i Wouldn't have Anything to Say about them!!

LETS GO

NAME: Ryouichi Tenma

AGE: Early Twenties

HEIGHT: 154cm

VIBE: Sleepy, plant obsessed, loves monsters and ghosts and especially Slime. Off-putting and shy, but very sweet. 

LIKES: Mold, fungi and carnivorous plants. Building terrariums and aquariums. Pixel art, cryptids and ghost stories. Frogs, snails and moths.

DISLIKES: Public bathrooms, loud noises. The smell of bleach.

SUMMARY:

Ryoutan started out as a Dangan Ronpa OC, a reserve student who would be thought to be the mastermind alongside his talented twin sister. Overtime, he’s morphed to be less angry and more strange. Ryou lives slowly and relaxed. He suffers from insomnia and reads ghost stories to make himself more okay with what could be creeping in the dark. Ryou is a fat, gay trans man, and has had trouble fitting in at school leading to some really unpleasant phobias. Ryou is probably my oldest OC and he means so much to me. He has been in more AUs than I can count and I refuse to stop <3. Ryou is the ambient man u need in ur life.

NAME: Setsuna Tenma

AGE: Early Twenties

HEIGHT: 156cm

VIBE: Punk rock, standoffish. Knows how to play the piano surprisingly well.

LIKES: Rollerblading, fighting games and sports like baseball and MMA. Cats, Ren fairs. Streams frequently.

DISLIKES: Overlyfriendly people (especially men). Cold weather. 

SUMMARY:

Setsuna started out as Ryouichi’s sister in a Dangan Ronpa killing game. She was the SHSL Astrologer. Now, her backstory has her as an old child star who quickly began to resent the fame. By the time she was in high school, Setsuna would begin getting into physical fights to protect her brother, and ended her career on her own terms. As she's grown up, she enjoys playing fighting games professionally, and rollerblading. Setsuna at her core is an extremely guarded person, believing she hurt her best friend via her own search for recognition in society. She loves deeply, but has a thick prickly outer shell that few can breach. She yearns for someone to hold her, and finds it easier to interact with people who are seemingly oblivious to her resting bitch face and sardonic humor. Setsuna is a bisexual cis woman.

NAME: Ciaran 

AGE: 19-20

HEIGHT: 175cm

VIBE: Repressed Catholic Demon. Anxious and overbearing.

LIKES: The routine of cleaning, the sensation of soft silk. Choir Music. Photography and sewing

DISLIKES: Cramped, dark spaces. The smell of dirt.

SUMMARY:

Ciaran was my second DnD character, but the first I really got attached to. A tiefling abandoned by his mother to a church that hated him, Ciaran’s life has been nothing but heartache and confusion. He serves a deity named the All-Father and has committed acts under duress to serve this deity. He’s pious, and a goody-two shoes, and his arc relies heavily on him exploring himself and breaking out of that cult mentality. Essentially a brainwashed Catholic raised in a magic cult compound, Ciaran is ill equipped to interact with the world in a healthy way. Almost as if someone wants him to end his pilgrimage to explore the world knowing he would stay by the church till the end. Haha, but he wouldn't be the target of manipulation…. Would he?

Ciaran is a transmasc bi guy. His gender is complicated.

NAME: Sorrel(-Sprouted-From-Spring) Augustine

AGE: 19-21

HEIGHT: 155 cm

VIBE: Runway princess. Rough around the edges and mysterious.

LIKES: Warm paths, chocolate. Being on the beach, sailing and fencing. 

DISLIKES: Nudity, slimy feeling things. The smell of incense. The taste of blood.

SUMMARY:

Imagine being sold on the idea of Divine Rights for Kings, in a world where being king means magical control equal to nuclear power. Then imagine that sense of superiority being taken away from you when you realize you will never get it, you’re gay as fuck, you’re about to be married to the worst man you know. I mean, then the only sensible option is to confront your fiance and try to leave right? 

In doing that, Sorrel left her kingdom disfigured and cursed to become a horrible monster, now set to be a dungeon crawler in hopes of ridding herself of her fiance’s influence. Originally a Dungeon Bitchs PC (Runaway Princess), Sorrel is now my main ttrpg character in a Heart campaign (Witch with Deadwalker flavoring). 

NAME: Jun Swiftriver

AGE: Mid Twenties

HEIGHT: 178cm

VIBE: A person who has nothing left to lose. Steals everything, gives nothing.

LIKES: Shiny baubles, hot meals. Jewelry, good fabric. The feeling of a feather pillow. The sensation of water on his skin.

DISLIKES: The smell of alcohol. Flames and ash. 

SUMMARY:

Jun started life out as a DnD concept. A water genasi who grew up as an unloved child in a noble family. When the common people finally took out his father and stepmother in an awful house fire Jun took it as a sign to be exactly what he wanted to be and form a new identity. Unfortunately, living completely destitute limited his options. Today, Jun has sold everything he can and stolen everything not nailed down. He’s the traveling companion of a scholar and relearning how to interact with others from a lifetime of being put down and isolated. Jun is a gay trans man.

NAME: Toulouse

AGE: 18-19

HEIGHT: 178 cm

VIBE: Clown!! Mime!! Jester!! Contortionist!! Don’t look behind you teehee!!!!!!

LIKES: Puppets!! Colors!! Aerobatics!! Gymnastics!! Stuffed animals!!! Real animals!! 

DISLIKES: Getting hurt :<!! Beetroot :<!! Sweeping!!!!!!!!

SUMMARY:

Toulouse is a creepy pasta concept come to life. Found by a traveling circus, Toulouse was unable to speak and couldn’t give himself a name. They decided to name him after the city they found him- Toulouse. Still mostly mute, Toulouse works as an acrobat, clown and contortionist for the circus. The catch being that the circus imbues its workers with magic, and it manifested in Toulouse a strong regenerative ability. Toulouse is a clown that simply cannot die. 

NAME: Vesper

AGE: 25

HEIGHT: 174cm

VIBE: God’s perfect little jester. Mean, off putting and pathetic.

LIKES: The sea, antique dolls, the smell of newspaper. Scarves and coats (bulky)

DISLIKES: Gore, braids, heights, tight spaces. Being Ignored.

SUMMARY:

A Magnus archives oc. Vesper was a mean girl until he transitioned at uni. During this time, he realised that for longer and longer periods he would literally be invisible to everyone, and that he wasn’t just being shunned. Eventually, Vesper spent 2 years being invisible to all of society. A chance meeting with a former victim- someone who could see him and someone experiencing similar changes and powers- set him on the path to discover more about Entities. Now, Ves is a pain in the ass to everyone, and constantly on the lookout. Think about him as the guy whose being infected with every disease at once, so none of them can get to him first. Still able to become invisible and spirited others away into fog.

NAME: Kjell Thorngren

AGE: 2000+ (Elf) Around 40-50 (Human)

HEIGHT: 196cm

VIBE: Sickly sweet incense, a smile that doesn’t reach the eye. I hate you for what you did, and I miss you like a little kid.

LIKES: Old books, cracking codes. The smell of snow and summer.

DISLIKES: Loss of control, dirt. The thought and feeling of pain.

SUMMARY:

Kjell is the enigmatic leader of Ciaran’s church. He takes in orphaned boys and raises them in the far north. His church is in a strange pocket of spring in a region that always snows. Kjell worships a fringe god, The All-Father, a parasitic vine god that has infested his old friend. Many of the boys are unaware of it’s true form, and are forced to participate in ritual sacrifice to it. Kjell is ego-driven, rude and considers himself superior to everyone around him. Deep inside, he feels deeply inadequate and has fostered these children to provide both the ego boost and sense of power over them. Kjell is obsessed with his old love, Caramel, to the point of obsessing over features Ciaran shares with him. A deeply abusive man, Kjell will do almost anything to ensure Ciaran returns to his fold. Kjell is a cis man wizard.

 

NAME: Caramel

AGE: 2000+ (Elf) Around 40-50 (Human)

HEIGHT: 188cm

VIBE: Dionysus, Hedonistic. A poet and muse, an inspiration and a deep well of creativity. 

LIKES: Life's simple and indulgent pleasures, the arts. Bodies of all shapes and sizes, the warmth of a good party.

DISLIKES: Overly clingy people. Rude comments, bad social etiquette.

SUMMARY:

Caramel started out as a backstory character for Ciaran’s main backstory antagonist. Kjell’s childhood friend turned somewhat lover turned murder victim, Caramel was a bright spark in Kjell’s life that really amped up Kjell’s possessiveness. Caramel was a poet, a scholar, easy going and smarter than Kjell, and for that Kjell both wanted to kill and immortalize him. The catalyst for Kjell’s life on the run, his murder and infestation with a parasitic god, serves as the backdrop for Kjell’s false religion. He started out as a nothing character, but I adored the idea and design of him so much that he became a larger and larger fixture in our AUs. Caramel is a bi cis man.

NAME: Von

AGE: 24

HEIGHT: 170cm

VIBE: Aloof older brother. Self serving, but as kind as he can be.

LIKES: MMA, Karate and other martial arts. Making flower crowns. Climbing trees. The clink of coins.

DISLIKES: Dependency. He really dislikes anyone touching his neck and back.

SUMMARY:

The other important church boy. The only boy that would stand up for him, and someone that actively ran away from the cult Ciaran was in. He’s still out there in the world, and often feels bad that he felt like he couldn’t take him with. He shows up a lot more in AUs. Von is a mlm cis man, and a human monk.

Here are all the boys at Ciaran's church (this is super old lmao)

See you for part two!

#pax.txt #oc tag #Ryou #Setsuna #Ciaran #Sorrel #Jun #Toulouse #Kjell #Caramel #Vesper #Von #pax art #I KNOW this is rlly rushed and shit and terrible but. i needed this out here

[skullchicken]

emoji ask for Alberich: 🤥 LYING, 🍩 DONUT, 🙊 SPEAK-NO-EVIL, 🏊 SWIMMING, 🔫 PISTOL, ⚙️ GEAR, 🌈 RAINBOW, ❤️ RED HEART

Get ready for T👏 M👏 I👏 !

🏊 SWIMMING - can they swim? or are they afraid of water? how well do they swim? how do they feel about swimming in the ocean? Alberich can swim - barely. He goblinized into a giant as a teenager (at goblinization day, no less - he's pretty old) and didn't get much use out of the skill since then because

a) it's kinda hard to swim in pools when you're 3 m / 10 feet tall

b) he dislikes showing his body in public. To quote "I have some intense stretch marks. No-one needs to see that."

🤥 LYING - are they good liars? do they have tells to show they're lying? Yes. As a former citizen of Horizon (he got a cushy job at an art museum which he finally became the director of because of his parent's influence) he has decades of experience lying through his teeth and especially to himself. Once the disillusion really hit him, he simply continued the habit by selling forged artworks to rich people.

Until one day he sold one to a certain draconic CEO and had leave the country real quick to start a new life in the UCAS under a new name.

🙊 SPEAK-NO-EVIL - what is something your oc will refuse to stay quiet about?

If you get his mind into an altered state (sleep deprivation, too much wine, cram…) he will start ranting about…

Bauhaus "if you think about it, it really is an economic, practical and - at its inception - even equalist architecturial style. It's only downside, really, is that it's horrendous to look at and hostile to human life")

the art of Gauguin "what possessed the man to mix every color palette with mustard? And don't even get me started on the objectifying, exploitative, colonialism-extravaganza of his subject matters!"

... or any other topic of art history he has Big Opinions about.

Putting the rest of these under the cut :)

🔫 PISTOL - do they trust people easily? how easily will they turn their back to someone? have they been backstabbed before? will they betray someone if given an ultimatum?

Ohoho, he is so paranoid for the above reason. Yet on the other hand his mentor spirit is Oak, which translates to literally being willing to die for someone he sees worthy of being protected. (Though of course he doesn't let people know.)

e.g. in the game where I played him, he quite quickly befrieded a lil elf-poser hacker and he did in fact almost die for her, because she asked him nicely to fend of a guard-spirit so she has a shot at freeing some prisoners from a bunraku.

At the same time, every time they talked via commlink he would tape over the camera and worry she might find out where he lives ¯_(ツ)_/¯

❤️ RED HEART - their love language(s)?

Words and gifts.

He considers being nice to people to be the easiest way to get people to do what you want. But he also just enjoys complimenting people and speaking kind words when he gets the chance. He would send his co-runners thank-you-notes after their missions.

He also once had a very sweet conversation with the aforementioned elf-poser hacker who confided in him by showing him her matrix-persona who she wished she was more like (in meat-space she was very shy and socially anxious, on the matrix she was a confident leader). So he logged into the MMORPG she liked to play, downloaded the persona-model and 3D-printed it to give it to her.

Y'know. As a symbol to help her bring her ideal self into meat-space.

🌈 RAINBOW - what advice would they give to their younger self?

Oof, that's a painful one. So, Alberich was married twice. The love of his younger years was Terry, an Orc who died of VITAS. He didn't take it well and due to that and his job being very… corporate, he was dipping in and out of depressive phases when he met his wife. His wife was funny, quirky and optimistic. But one day she decided to leave out of the blue, saying that she needs to find herself. He's still fears that it was something he did.

What he would say to his self from 5 years ago would thus be: "Get professional help for your depressive phases. Your wife is trying to carry both you and your emotions and you're crushing her."

⚙️ GEAR - what are your ocs thoughts on science & art? which do they give more importance to? how much value do they place on each?

Alberich loves art with a passion, but he is also very disllusioned with the art world. Science and technology brought him companionship shortly after his goblinization, since he became a shut-in for a good half to a full year. Rationally he thinks science is more important. Emotionally he just loves in what ways the human spirit can express itself way too much.

🍩 DONUT - favourite sweet treat?

Ice cream :)

#alberich #shadowrun #thank you for the asks #this was very self-indulgent for me #troll #horns

[hannaweeen]

My Life: Lead Up To My Diagnosis.

I thought I would share this as it may help others to relate, as well as help me process the lead-up to my autism diagnosis. The battle I went through, and the ultimatum.

Young Years/Toddler: (age 4 till 8)

being extremely clingy to mum, and would hide behind her

was shy of everyone

hated being touched, and would hurt people who invaded my space.

hated hugs

read the same books & did the same activities over and over for comfort

quiet

felt alone, and depressed. didn't understand why.

had a few very close friends.

Child ( 9+)

extremely blunt, rude, outspoken had no filter

argued with everyone (for dopamine?)

wasn't liked by classmates for this

suffered from nausea before school, and threw up a lot from anxiety.

had intense hobbies

copied others to 'fit in'

would have panic attacks but didn't know what they were, never told anyone

High School Years

Argued and fell out with almost everyone

Started self-harming, and feeling suicidal.

Had one or two very good friends who understood me.

Didn't fit in.

Referred to CAMHS and school counsellors. Didn't listen to my concerns or feelings about my MH, and told them something was going on more than just anxiety.

Anxiety and panic attacks crept back in at age 14.

Tried hypnotherapy, which cost my mum a lot. She was desperate to help me during this period and keep me in school.

Attendance plummeted, went home 'sick', and avoided school.

Felt like a failure. Bad grades, no matter how hard I tried. Cried and had meltdowns a lot, just didn't know it was a meltdown at the time.

Didn't understand what was 'wrong' with me

Couldn't do exams in the big hall. Had panic attacks and had to go into a small room to do them.

Sixth Form/University. (16-20)

Sixth form/College aged 16:

Yet again had no friends, no matter how hard I tried.

Kept to myself. Had awful attendance, again.

Had to do my work from home by the end of the second year.

Couldn't handle going in.

Started local counselling, but felt like it didn't help.

Started my first job with the public, only lasted a few weeks as I felt stage fright talking to people. Couldn't handle it.

Did work experience at college, which lasted 4 hours. Went home crying from exhaustion, thought I was just anxious and lazy.

Easily manipulated and love-bombed by others. University:

Never went in. Submitted work. Got good grades despite this.

Refused to do group work.

Felt locked in a prison by accommodation, made no friends and fell out with the ones I had.

Thought I had BPD.

Dropped out of university.

19+ Adult Years.

Ended an abusive relationship.

Obsessive intrusive thoughts started. Had a breakdown and spent time in a mental health ward.

Still didn't understand what was "wrong with me".

Anxiety and depression are at an all-time high. Suicidal.

Tried to work again, lasted a month.  started having heart palpitations there, and had the stage fright feeling again.

Got into self-employment.

At around age 21, my sister's boyfriend brought up that he thought I may have autism, due to my lack of joke understanding, sarcasm and bluntness.

As I and my family looked into the symptoms more, we realised I could. My mum referred me to be assessed.

If you would like a post about my assessment, let me know and support me, please! https://www.buymeacoffee.com/hannaween

#autism #late diagnosed autistic #autistic adult #actually autistic #autistic

[noblechaton]

soooo I sorta rambled about my coming out as trans the other day elsewhere for national coming out day and kinda feel like rambling here too so uh. anyway

for the longest time I’d sort of intentionally obscured my gender and let people refer to me as they saw fit and for a time I’d told myself everything from it maintaining some ~mystery~ to being outright afraid of losing friends over it but for just about as long I’d sorta. hated being referred to in a masculine sense but then I also hated that bc I. had to be masculine. y’know? that’s how I was raised 

and that’s right bc why wouldn’t it be right? sure I still feel all....weird but like I was raised that way and can’t be the other way bc I am the way I am and that’s how I was raised and like

how could that be wrong?

why do I feel wrong? 

so it just sorta sat there in my brain and in my heart for most of my life in some cage I’d refuse to acknowledge just like that. like I couldn’t possibly be that way bc I was the other way and it couldn’t be wrong

I talked about this in my coming out post way back when now but I’ve felt like this since kindergarten - that I was different, that I was wrong somehow and I just didn’t know how for a long time bc I didn’t really have a frame of reference or anything for this sorta stuff but then when that stopped being an issue and I had more space to learn and explore myself I still sort of intentionally didn’t and only went as far as my sexuality which I confronted more head on and confidently for some reason

bc again. how could it be wrong? but then why have I felt for my entire life that I was wrong? it made me angry whenever I’d even briefly considered the notion - that I was stupid or greedy or something for even thinking like that

and now I can sorta realize that all of that - from intentionally obscuring myself to not allowing myself the ability to broach the subject - was bc I hated myself. I hated myself for not being what they’d raised me as while hating myself for feeling as if I couldn’t be the other way, the way that some friends saw me as, despite that being the most comfortable for me - and they made me so happy when they’d refer to me in a feminine way entirely by accident

yet I never commented on it or encouraged it bc. it couldn’t be right. that wasn’t right. right?

and like. the more it seeped out and the more I found myself sitting on it over the last few years especially. for a while it scared me. it horrified me that maybe those feelings I’d had since kindergarten were actually valid and that maybe this super obvious explanation was actually right the entire time and oh my god am I trans? am I trans? how can I be trans? no I’m not. I’m not trans I can’t be trans

that’s. kinda how it felt in my head when it all really clicked which was just a few weeks before I’d actually more publically came out. I panicked and felt so anxious and scared and angry again like I had been so many times thru the years and yet with a few minutes and some music I’d sorta calmed down and just breathed. I don’t know why but that late night I settled down and sat at my glowing monitor, the only light in my room, and just breathed and thought and when it felt right I finally let myself just. accept. 

I cried. I’m kinda crying now lmao. I fought myself for my entire life but for some reason that night I just. stopped fighting. I let it sit and let myself think. I thought of how happy it made me when I was referred to in a more feminine sense and how much joy I felt in having my nails done or my bushy eyebrows complimented. even the lil things like silly pet names over the years that were far from masculine rushed back along my thoughts and I just. sat there crying and accepting until I managed to smile again. then a few weeks later I swapped my pick and y’all picked up on it hard and fast lmao

it’s still...hard. knowing that I’m different in this way and yet sorta having to stay in the way my family raised me since none of them know yet and honestly I don’t think they ever will. and so I’m not as outward about it as I’d like - my nails are long but I dunno when I’ll paint them, I can’t dress as I’d wish or carry myself like I’d want and hrt is a far off fantasy for my broke ass and there’s still that lingering doubt y’know? that thought that I’m doing this wrong and that I’m a fake somehow

but sometimes I’ll catch myself in a reflection real briefly and I’ll see my eyelashes and my brows and my eyes - still wear masks lol - and I’ll see myself in this more feminine light and it’ll make me feel so happy. and my friends - the people most important to me - accepted me without hesitation and sure they slip up sometimes but. they accepted me. 

I accepted me

and....I’m proud of that. even if it took me a while and even if it’s still super private and not entirely how I want it to be

I’m proud that I finally feel comfortable in who I am

#big dumb long personal post i shouldnt make but anyway #maybe delete later. idk. in a mood lately #im trans and im gay and im glad that thats who i am #actually this post took me like an hour to write in any coherent manner it aint getting deleted lmao #buried maybe. privated maybe. but still