Horror movie fans are so funny because you'll bring up the biggest actor who's in 10,000 iconic roles, and they'll go, "Oh, the guy from Blood Burger 4: Keep Flipping." and that's the only thing on their filmography that they've seen.
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(teaching my art class)
me: and what’s the number one rule when designing characters with wings? …well?
a handful of students, sighing reluctantly: no good fa-
me (interrupting them): NO good-faith attempts at realism, EVER. you want all the bird dweebs and physicists jumping ship as EARLY AS POSSIBLE so they’re not around to cinemasins your ass when you get to the cool parts of your story, and…ugh, what now, gerald
gerald (my least favorite student): why not just do some minimal research instead of-
me: listen you little shit i can and will singlehandedly tank your 4.0 gpa
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"apparently if we do a miracle together it all works a bit too well" listen LISTEN i think this is why. i think the magnitude and power of that miracle they did together is what alerted the metatron and why he has come to separate them by all means, because they have not realized yet quite how powerful they are together and what that could mean!! this is why, i think???? they used to do each other's miracles and temptations for each other, but never with, and that could change everythign and could get in the way of certain Ineffable Plans (that i don't think are necessarily God's, looking at you villain metatrash)
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The most unrealistic thing about Baldur's Gate 3 is how you have a group of 25+++++ year olds that are perfectly ok sleeping on the floor every night.
I sit on the floor for five minutes and I just about need to call Withers for a resurrection and even if he brought me back, I still have the *Bad Back* debuff.
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Jazz is wandering Gotham with Danny after their parents visited the city for a convention but left them behind in the excitement of one of their ghost traps going off on the other side of the country.
The hotel they were staying at kicked them out not caring if they had a place to stay or not, only caring that the source of money had left.
Jazz couldn't show how scared she actually was, not when Danny was looking at her with complete faith that she could somehow fix this.
How he managed to keep that faith after a day of jumping at shadows like they held enemies and vending machine food for lunch was a mystery.
She's tired, she's stressed, and she needs an adult.
Like an actual adult and not her much loved but very scatterbrained parents, Vlad did not count either.
Nightwing: *falls from great heights into nearby dumpster* ...ow.
Jazz: ...You'll do.
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DP x DC: The Most Dangerous Card Game
Ok so Danny has essentially claimed earth as his. And he is fully aware that there are constant threats to the planet. Now he can’t stop a threat that originates on earth (that’s something he’ll leave to the Justice league) but he can do something about outside threats. Doing some research on ancient spells, rituals, and artifacts, he cast a world wide barrier on the planet to protect it from hostile threats so they cannot enter. This will prevent another Pariah Dark incident. However, barriers like this come at a price. You see, there are two ways to make a barrier. Either make one powered up by your own energy and power (which would be constantly draining) or set up a barrier with rules. The way magic works is that nothing can be absolutely indestructible. It must have a weakness. The most powerful barriers weren’t the ones reinforced with layer after layer of protective charms and buffed up with power. Those could eventually be destroyed either by being overpowered, wearing them down, or by cutting off the original power source. No, the most powerful barriers were the ones with a deliberate weakness. A barrier indestructible except for one spot. A cage that can only be opened from the outside. Or that can only be passed with a key or by solving a riddle. So Danny chooses this type of barrier and does the necessary ritual and pours in enough power to make it. And he adds his condition for anyone to enter.
Now the Justice league? Find out about the barrier when Trigon attempts to attack, they were preparing after he threatened what he would do once he got to earth. How he would destroy them. The Justice league tried to take the fight to him first but were utterly destroyed, so they retreated home to tend to their injuries, and fortify earth for one. Last. Stand. Only when Trigon makes his big entrance…he’s stopped.
The Justice league watch in awe as this thin see-through barrier with beautiful green swirls and speckled white lights like stars apears blocking Trigon and his army’s advance. The barrier looks so thin and fragile yet no matter how hard the warlord hits, none of his attacks can get through and neither can he damage said barrier. That’s when Constantine and Zatanna recognizes what this barrier is. Something only a powerful entity could create. For a moment, the league is filled with hope that Trigon can’t get through yet Constantine also explains that it’s not impenetrable. And clearly Trigon knows this too for he calls out a challenge.
And that’s when, in a flash of light, a tiny glowing teenager appears. He looked absolutly minuscule compared to Trigon and yet practically glowed with power (this isn’t a King Danny AU though).
And that is when the conditions for passing the barrier are revealed. And the Justice realize that the only thing stopping Trigon and his army from decimating earth. The only way he can get through….is by beating this glowing teenager in a card game.
Not just any card game though. The most convoluted game Sam, Danny, and Tucker invented themselves. It’s like the infinite realms version of magic the gathering, combined with Pokémon, and chess. And Danny is the master. So sit down Trigon and let’s play.
(The most intense card game of the Justice league’s life).
After Danny wins, this happens a few more times with outer word beings and possibly even demons attempting to invade earth, yet none have been able to beat the mysterious teenager in a card game. Constantine might even take a crack at it and try to figure out how to play. He’s really bad though. Every time this happens, the Justice league worry that this might be the time the teenager looses. Yet every time, he wins (even if only barely).
Meanwhile, Danny, Sam, and Tucker have gotten addicted to the game and play it almost daily. Some teachers might seem them playing the game are are like ‘awww how cute’ not realizing this game is literally saving the world. Jazz is just happy they aren’t spending as much time on their screens playing Doomed.
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