#next time you try to baby me for whatever reason idc if its because im trans or mlm or what please just fucking STOP

[araisbored]

Obelisk

That’s the only quirky title I could come up to make this a little bit more interesting.

I’m reviewing my favorite book again. More like making another post about it. Because I seem like the type of person to not shut up about something she truly, truly, deeply love. Though, I won’t really making a review. Because I am in no state to make one of those. I don’t know I just I’m not that qualified to that yet. Though I read millions of books, I still won’t. I re-read my last “review” and it just make me cringe because I can’t understand what I’m saying and there’s a bunch of errors on my sentence. Not that this whole post won’t containing grammar errors, but still. Also, the cringing intensifies when I saw that Jennifer Niven (the author of this book) liked my bizarrely wrong blog entry. Ms. Niven, if by any chance, reading this again, I love your work and I’m sorry for a lot of grammatical errors. Ms. Niven, your work changed my life and help me get through a rough time. Sounds cliché but its the truth. 

To repeat what I typed, I won’t make a review. Yet, I’ll post a very private diary log which where I somehow discuss my opinions about this book. So here it is. 

Trigger warning: Suicide topics, cutting and mental issues might come up on the next following paragraph. And it’s really graphic. Because it is a personal log on my digital diary. Beware. 

May 17, 2019: Theodore’s death, Avengers: End game and GoT discussion.

I never had a proper review of this book. Because lets be real here. Its me and probably won’t matter. Last time or more like last last year, I made a book recommendation/favourites about this book. And I emphasize on that blog post that it’s not a book review. NOT A BOOK REVIEW. At all.

Because:

I am scared of the internet scrutinizing my opinions and views about this book.

It’s about mental health or part of it. So it is really a sensitive topic and I even haven’t figured myself out. So I’m not really sure if  I’m the right person you want to have an opinion regarding with this topic. One thing about me is that you don’t go asking me questions on how you figured your life or how you deal with depression because, oh boy oh boy you’re in a wrong place honey.

Last night I searched Theodore Finch on twitter. Yes, twitter. Because that is where you get the real opinions. Real tea. As well as the stupid ones. And I read one thread or whatever you call it, some sort of a conversation or replies from one girl to another. (I just assumed you’re girl and I’m sorry if you’re not. I am really sorry for misgendering you.) The other girl said that she’s kind of annoyed how everyone around Theodore doesn’t get the signs when it’s literally on their faces. When you come to think of it. Its true. All the signs of Theodore’s disease was there. Bluntly on their faces. It’s kind of fascinating how it’s not noticed by his family and friends or even Violet. But again right now thinking about it, maybe because it happened when this world just slowly noticing or paying attention about mental health. Hold a second, let me search when it was published. Yeah, I'm right its 2015. A year of coming of age for the late Baby Boomers are introduced to depression and when people, mostly teenagers are committing suicide. I would be very harsh on my words because it was just me talking to myself anyways. So yeah, that's also the year where I'm cutting myself and wanted to kill myself. So no wonder Finch’s family have no idea about his mishaps and adventures. So about that discussion, it was already solved. That year was just the year where naïve people are introduced to mental health and issues. Anyways, back to that conversation. The other girl defended the book/author. That the author, Jenifer Niven, was just portraying real life happenings. That these things happens in real life. People really die because of mental health issues. By the way, Finch mental diagnosis wasn’t really mentioned on the book directly. As far as I can remember. That’s why I'm re-reading it again now. But so far zero mentioned of diagnosis or bipolarity(Is that even a word? idc.). Just the mention of him wanting to kill himself, the erotic changes in his moods, lack of appetite and being insomniac. He doesn’t sleep one night or he sleeps then have very bad nightmares after that. It’s pretty obvious but again, let’s refer to the points given above. Oh, oh! Then there’s one time he repainted his bedroom from blood red to blue. If that’s not alarming enough then idk anymore. But yes, 2015. The coming of age and the year where we birthed more stupid late boomers. But, yes. Wild book. A very wild and very BRILLIANT book. It’s the stupid characters or the people in Finch’s life that suck. Which is why I kind of sided to the girl who said that that the author doesn’t really write the characters well. Let’s call her Girl A. And the other girl who defend Niven, Girl B. I’m pretty sure you’re both girls but just in case, I’m gonna apologize again if I'm  misgendering you. Or if you don’t wanna be called a girl. I can’t say or disclose that Girl B was wrong because he clearly have a point too. It happens in real life. People die from depression and I might be one soon.

Just wanna say that It’s a good discourse. Arguments like that are my favorites where both sides are not wrong nor right either, makes you really think. A read. Both the book and that twitter discourse. If you happened to read it, good. But if not sorry I can’t link it for you. 

So for my opinion (oh no, here we go) I agree on both of them , as if its not yet obvious. I guess if it was written in the present days the author could’ve change the characters and made Finch alive. Or checked-in in a mental institution or he’ll be given a medical assistance he really needs. Because the only medical attention he was given was thru his Guidance councilor, Embryo. Which is a good thing, but also I think Finch’s situation needs more professional attention. No offence to all guidance councilors out there. I know you guys try your best. But you know, Niven can make Finch visit a psychiatrist in a clinic/mental institution right? Like violet. I know Finch’s financial state is bad but.. idk there’s something can be done here. But again it was during that time where people are shouting “Depression isn’t real”, stupid people posting tweets and Facebook status on how “Suicide is for the week”; they watch 13 reasons why and decided to skip the whole point of the show and just assumed that “yeah depression is for the weaklings”. It only shows how ignorant people are. They’re the kind of people who standby when you get punch on the face or laugh when people spreads rumors and lies about you. Basically, bystanders. I’m sorry I’m a little snappy. If you haven’t noticed. I don’t know I’m just mad today.

I think the book still holds it. And justify the ending. Though part of me really hate it too. But it kind of made me realized about a lot of things, not just about me but also about how I should interact with other human beings. I hate the ending because it breaks my heart but I guess it was necessary?? Or not. Any how,  It was a good ending. Maybe its just me because I’m a masochist. But I can not think of any other impactful and realistic way on ending it. (Rereading this again and I just need to clear things up. That IM NOT A MURDERER OR A KILLER. I DONT NORMALIZE SUICIDE,  but from a standing point the ending is justified. Its sad but its, again, realistic.) But still, breaks my heart, Theodore is a precious boy. Who deserves nothing but love. And I hope his story was more known by the people so jackasses would know how to treat their family and friends better. 

[This part was cut because I talked about Avengers and GoT ending; Which is very relevant to this topic]

Love,

Ara xx

So yeah, that’s some of my diary entry. Re-reading it makes me realized how funny I am. Jesus I should read more of these. Who knows, I might post it here. If it’s not that personal. I’ll end this here now. I hope wherever you are you’re having a good day.

Ttyl, Ara!

#books #jennifer niven #All the Bright Places

[sikereviewdotcom]

strawberry shortcake s2 ep1 - horse of a different color

this one was suggested by someone who couldnt keep their mouth shut and not sing the strawberry shortcake intro theme in the middle of our economy class

no one wanted to hear that, but they  went ahead and then i actually followed up on that train of thoughts i remembered about the fucking cartoons and i knew it pronto: its a must-see shit its like slightly above the level of magical school bus series, but the final rating is for the fin not the beginning so lets begin this horseshit:

were reviewing “horse of a different color”, it focuses indeed on strawberrys horse, honey pie pony (its her entire damn name, how sweet right? like all of them, i got diabete from this review but its the cost of maintaining this blog anyway, the kids are playing together on a that tree having fun jumping around like chimpanzees hooba hooba but sadly our filly quickly realizes she cant play king kong with them and keep falling on her ass,

yet since theyre all retarded or young (id say its a fifty-fifty case for them kinda normal ig, i mean they ARE literal 6yo) they try several ways of getting her up on that tree, not thinking how to get her down if they ever were to succeed (good for them: aint happening) its child labor too btw, from an horse still same deal what if honey pie fell down on them? crushing them corpses with her mighty pounds? the findus company would be delighted to hear such news, im sure its some quality (sweet ass) horse meat

once it all fails she understands a horse isnt meant to climb a tree, too big too fat its four legged, not even entertaining the relationship giraffes have with trees

but it aint over, then (after a talk with herself) hp hears the laughters of a bunch of kids which catches her attention, it always does who can ignore that sorta noise? although she aint annoyed by it shes just into the idea of riding a bike now, shes even gonna get a go at it oh yea thats it we finally found her human hobby gogdamn shes a backward furry

of course it fails aswell since she has no hand for the handle and shes heavy so i guess its the reason why she rides into w/e and cant stop? because otherwise she couldve also just.. actually it makes no sense does it? i mean she couldve easily stopped the ride actually how is that kid bike even holding her? ive never tried putting a pony on a bike for 6 y/o but i doubt about its capacity in not being crushed aswell as i doubt in the kids bones not being severely damaged after a visit under honey pies horsy buttcheeks

but all of that really makes her sad: she cant play with her human friends and shes the only horse around strawberry land or whatever see me tearing it for her, theres so much emotions in this episode especially after that filly trynna get kids to get into some horseplay horseshit like dude theyre only 6, lets go easy on them, might have a problem with the parents of the kids watching this episode no one even thought how fucked up this one part is? sure horseplay isnt only sexual or w/e but it still is the visual of 6yos on all four jumping around and neighing together with their ass a little bit too exposed wow im going on a dangerous road here? aint i? not gonna sue the writers im sure it was their subconscious speaking probably got issues from their childhood, eventually got them sorted out since 2004 what do i know? aside from me not caring

back on track : after seeing horsey being so sad the kiddos decide to get her a horse friend but where the fuck? they got no idea, they are proud nonetheless and go tell honey the good new until they are like “wait but we have no idea where to find horses!” ofc we get a big reveal, some serious strawberry shortcake lore: actually all the horses, ALL OF THEM FROM THE ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET are on one (1) single island: ice cream themed to diversify it all they are just chilling over there in ponyland and for some reason this one here got lost or idk guys she took the boat and checked the rest of the world out as an even younger filly, found strawberry and her friends and decided now she was a centaur  slash humanrry furry human, idk you get it but shes their friend and so on to introduce the concept of an AWESOME island full of equestrian activity and ofc ice cream but its kinda lame because who cares? everythings already made out of food, also why isnt the ice cream melting? its one water? nevermind for the introduction as i was saying, hp sings an horrendous sounding song it deteriorated my ear drums they got pierced or something  or maybe im exagerrating? either case horses cant sing:

so to the ice cream land they go, huh

of course it wouldnt be a big adventure without an almost broken bridge oh no whatever shall we do? could we possibly cross it safely? lets try it out  guys: yay it worked good for us little stress and suspense it was wack how they got honey pie out of the hole her big ass hoove made im mesmerized by the power of friendship and sugar at this point, just in full awe for the rest of the episode probably over dosed on all the ice cream flavoured horseshit, i got some all over my mouth its dripping on my desk i gotta clean that later

next thing we know: horses its all this episode is about (aside from labor) but you see, so far hp would switch between normal human language and neighing well turns out her other fellow equines can only neigh and so they just neigh together while our english well-spoken mammal translates to the moronic kids who just smile smuggly

of course the animals are having a welcome party then, dancing around while the morons are just bored, harsh one being a cartoon character isnt it guys? w/e theyre gonna ask for honey pie to come back home now, convinced that her natural habit isnt her place and she loves them too much to just leave them and never come back and break any plans they ever had together- oh shit looks like shes leaving forever huh? what a plot twist mark that on the bitch quota for today

the first one to leave is the little boy btw, important thing to note: hes the biggest pussy he cant even face reality: oh no, no more pony back time before sleep thats quite a bummer, downer and man how are they going to survive now they got no animal to watch over them? jesus theyre soon, on the boat (idk where they got it from idk why suddenly theyre on a boat because then theyre once again gonna cross that bridge but ok) anyway yea theyre having a relationship crisis during that ship trip yada yada ah and the bridge, because (see i do not call them morons for now reasons obviously they deserve this title not only because theyre 6 but also because they are just daft:) they proceed, once in the middle of the bridge all 4 of them, to stop and wonder

“will the bridge be able to hold all of us? wont it break? damn i wonder if it will crack” and they talks without moving until vlam: a tree comes and breaks it (dont ask) so now theyre in trouble:

back to ponyland: bitch pie realizes how much she misses her actual friends and that she can speak english which her other horse friends cant do so she is special and probably abnormal, shes a big outcat of the pony society and has no other reason but to escape her incoming death sentence for fraternizing with the humans of course none of the second part is true, she just wants to see the kids again so she says asta la vista baby to the neigher team and runs away see, she hasnt taken the boat and yet also arrive to the bridge? why a boat sequence then? i will skip this for now but it WILL play in the rating, imagine im the parent of the youngster watching this crap and i have to endure it

if it sucks this bad and is this illogical i might just get bored and change the channel, idc my progeny aint gonna be watching this in either case, ill make them watch political debates then interrogate them on what they learned after what but it wasnt actual political debates just random furry youtuber venting with their fursona sprites animated and thats how you make your kids retarded, the kick of this joke is that i aint planning on getting any kids but totally gonna make them watch classics too such as the attack of the killer donuts as soon as they reach 6 so they wont be dumb and probably not getting diabete or w/e in their adulthood

then honey pie saves the kids btw all of them, heavy shit

and they all go back to strawberryland, happily after a big “wow i missed you sm, you are my real friends w/e if you dont look like me i aint speciest guys really!” theyre all vegan too btw so this works for them i havent watched enough strawberry shortcake episodes to know if they ever eat meat but i have doubts seeing how theyre into a very cannibalistic diet which include eating dessert when obviously thats what they are at least half part, this cartoon raises a lot of political questions it may have a deeper value than i first attributed to it

the end: another terrible song plays about horseshit and how tasty it is

thats all folks

so the rating: big 6/10, so you know 5/10 if its a decent kid show where im highly eager to click on the x and get back making jams but nah

surprisingly enough, i only wanted to stop watching half of the episode and not the entirity of it so credits for thats since im an adult and not a kid, imagining kids enjoyed this sweet childish cartooness or w/e now why +1? its because of how many political questions it raised, how it made me think about our society and cakes yknow its more than kids having a conflict with an horse it talks about veganism, specism, handicap, cannibalism, the management of the limited ressources were exploiting and so on yea really makes you think, its subliminal messages to make kids smarter: they watch their dessert-imbecile counterparts doing bs and then get it right irl: good  ah- it also makes it better for you when youre watching this with your kid, you suddenly transcend to another level of spirituality, existential crisis activated or at least reasoning mode or w/e youre willing to name this the point is you arent bored still despite all of this i rated it quite low for such a serious kid cartoon what couldve possibly made me tic? 1) kids are morons and cant understand all of this, not clear enough for the targeted public 2) projection onto the characters/dialogues from the writers of their childhood traumas (the horse play event didnt go unnoticed, karren brown) 3) my little pony ripoff 4) its controversial, our society, especially in 2004 couldnt understand the depth of this shit and finally 5) i got so much ice cream flavoured horseshit all over my desk god help me this is so filthy what a fucking mess i would totally recommand it to anyone who feels like being blown away by the statements made in this work of art 6/10 but really we all know in the future, itll be a 9/10, some ahead-of-its-time-crap

tg, out

#strawberry shortcake #cartoon review #cartoons #sike reviews #child labor #pony labor #art #classic #diabete fuel #reviews

[pokefanbri]

I'm a good person, I have a good heart, im a good Christian woman or try to be despite my sailor mouth & what have you, nobodys perfect. But I know my rights from wrongs, I don't bite the hand that feeds me, I keep the faith & its not my problem if others don't have faith in me I'm used to it...idc what people think & neither should u, idc if someone doesn't like me for whatever reason say a crappy customer...but put yourself in their shoes...if someone is mean to u realize others are going through their own stuff respectively & take it with a grain of salt cuz it's them not u. We aren't responsible for anyone's happiness but our own...we all have our own ecosystems to take care of & manage for a happy healthy life best we can within our abilities, though we can certainly try ofcourse to help someone out if we are able & if they even want the help depending on level of stubbornness, pay it forward & all that. All we can do is try to push on, keep on trucking, & overcome what's put infront of us..we're built to do so, but we cant get good results or get what we want without putting in the effort & work.

I observe & soak in information like a sponge, its part of my disability but its a gift & I apply what I learn to tasks at hand..im great at the jobs I do, i have a TON of experience i know how to take care of myself even if I struggle in the process....sure I complain alot through it I know lol, but my struggles make me a strong independent lady afterall. I like being more of a follower but have the heart of a born leader.

My mother is very street smart & was beautiful too, I got that from her..i see her in my own face & it scares the crap outta me lol, but im not her & I never will be...it saddens me she leads a life of self destruction however there's nothing I can do believe me Ive tried to save her....again not my responsibility & I went through hell with her to figure that out...not everyone wants to be helped, not everyone wants to better themselves. Nothing wrong with giving them support & having their back, but ultimately they're the ones that have to figure it out.

Good or bad u affect yourself & those around u especially young children, u want to make a good impact on them. I try my best with what's handed to me, I didn't have parents that loved me, my twin brother & I were Mardi gras babies conceived in New Orleans lol, I grew up uncared for, thinking I was worthless & that I don't matter...& affects me even now especially if shown to me by those I care about, it brings me back to my roots the little girl that just wants to be loved & appreciated. I know im not worthless & couldn't be further from the truth...Im fully aware of how damaged I am from the life I was given but I try not to show my fragile self, there's nothing wrong with it & just means I've been fighting for way too long, but im afraid I'll lose someone because of it if they're not equipped to handle it, & unfortunately I have once. Which is why Id rather keep it in til I'm alone & my emotions run it course because it's my problem nobody elses, I dont want my teary eyed hot mess to affect anyone else. I usually dont cry alot, 2020 especially brought it out but I feel we can all relate. Lately I've been doing great, im working on loving myself more everyday.

But I mean who isn't damaged, everyone is affected by their past in some way but it helps u grow nomatter what kinda hand ur given. I try not to let meanies get to me but I do...cause it makes me feel like im the problem, & I react most the time by crying out of frustration, depression, anxiety, etc. I dont as much anymore which is great but once I move I know im just gonna ball my eyes out. Sometimes If someone snaps at me or someone I care about best believe I'll defend & snap right back unless I'm held back lol (except at work obviously) im a firecracker...thats in my genes too but I'm more sweet than sour. I stress through everything..u can't even tell I keep it bottled up & put on a brave face...however I have kicked or punched walls, fall to the floor in defeat with my head in my hands, but once I get past it I can rest easy...the relief & reward is worth the effort, and then onto the next obstacle in my way lol. I try my best, thats all we can do right. If at 1st you don't succeed try try again. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger. If you feel like giving up, you have more strength than u give yourself credit for. Stay positive the best you can, it makes things easier & lights up a negative environment. I hope I helped someone in some way by this, I cant do much or communicate by mouth as well as I can by writing but at least I tried ❤ nite

[softly-mossy]

been tagged by @drdone to do these 92 thingos

LAST:

1. Drink: coca cola

2. Phone call: i had to call my mom because i was Lost in a hobby lobby

3. Text message: text to srah that’s just “rats...we’re the rats...rats...” to bother her

4. Song you listen to: one of the grineer soundtracks looped while i was trying to do chemistry

5. Time you cried: mmlmao last tuesday in the fuckign middle of lab

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: no, i guess almost? but then i put my foot down kind of and said nah

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: i only kiss my dog on her head and i never regret it

8. Been cheated on: my cat is fake as hell!! like to snuggle until she had a prime chance to bite your arm and then leave

9. Lost someone special: i mean yeah

10. Been depressed: ?? i don’t know? like i’ll have little funks but they’re nowhere near how bad they were

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: im a babby that hasn’t gotten drunk so no

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. blue

13. orange

14. seafoam green

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: EYAH

16. Fallen out of love: don’t think so?

17. Laughed until you cried: a few days ago i was talking with srah and drew a very very poorly created baby and was in a pizza place when i sent it so i had to be quiet but i knew she would get mad at it so i was havin a good chuckle

18. Found out someone was talking about you: as in badly? i have no idea but i’m sure it’s happened

20. Found out who your friends are: yaes

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: n o

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: like a lot of them. maybe only like....a dozen are from online

23. Do you have any pets: we really gonna go there again

24. Do you want to change your name:sometimes i think about it. like “max” is a cool name to me

25. What did you do for your last birthday: i don’t think i did anything because i didn’t feel good

26. What time do you wake up: it depends.. days i have class usually like 8:30 to 8:45 but if i don’t there’s no rhyme or reason so it’s a wild card

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: tryin to stay warm and playin warframe

28. Name something you can’t wait for: i don’t know, gettin a horse?? there’s semi drag races next may so i guess im lookin forward to that a bit too

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like 10 minutes ago

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: my house i don’t really care about where it is but the size....bad

31. What are you listening to right now: diesel bros is on tv and i got some cr1tikal videos playing

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: YES last semester my microbiology teacher was named tom

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: my brother

34. Most visited website: tungle, the website for my chemistry book, and moodle

35. Mole/s: i have no idea where it’s not a freckle and its considered a mole

36. Mark/s:i got hella freckles and a noticeable scar on my middle finger where i stuck it in a pencil sharpener when i was a kid plus there’s scars all over my arms/knees for various reasons

37. Childhood dream: i went from wanting to be a vet, to being an astronomer, to being a field medic [?], back to being a vet. if we’re talking not careers then it’s still getting a horse

38. Hair color: brown

39. Long or short hair: long and the only thing i’ve EVER done with it is slapping it in a ponytail but i think about how free i would be if i just cut it short

40. Do you have a crush on someone: nah

41. What do you like about yourself: uhhhhhh i notice that i’m patient with stuff

42. Piercings: none

43. Blood type: i’ve no idea dude but i want to know

44. Nicknames: hannah banana/montana, hanners, truck fucker

45. Relationship status: sangle

46. Zodiac: taurus

47. Pronouns: she and her n all that

48. Favorite TV Show: WANDER OVER YONDER i found out all of the first season is onDemand and bout cried

50. Right or left hand: right

51. Surgery: i got my wisdom teeth taken out and it was the most surreal week i lived through

52. Hair dyed in different color:not at all really

53. Sport: is truck/tractor pulling a sport 

55. Vacation: i don’t really know?? i never really thought of places i’d vacay at

56. Pair of trainers: i don’t know what this means so uhh

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: im waiting for some pizza rolls to finish

58. Drinking: coke

59. I’m about to: eat pizza rolls

62. Want: i can’t articulate these things,, i guess want to have at least better finances so our fam would be all okay

63. Get married: idc

64. Career: pathologist!! i guess i’m technically halfway [?] through my program

65. Hugs or kisses: hugs bc they are good

66. Lips or eyes: would prefer if they had both

67. Shorter or taller: taller because i doubt there’s anyone that wouldn’t make me look like an actual baby

68. Older or younger: older?? around the same age i guess

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms for giving STRONG hugs and carrying MANY dogs

71. Sensitive or loud: depends on context? like everyday then really sort of sensitive but it’s not bad. if i’m expecting it to be like....continually loud then i’m fine with it too

72. Hook up or relationship: whatever has more hangouts with our dogs

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: ohh hesitant very much so. im a wuss

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: no

75. Drank hard liquor:  no

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i remember losing my purple glasses when i was like 7

77. Turned someone down: ? i guess i don’t know

78. Sex on the first date: no and that is a dealbreaker

79. Broken someone’s heart: not purposefully??

80. Had your heart broken: as in like sad then yes

81. Been arrested: no but i’ve been in a cop car more than once

82. Cried when someone died: i get upset when i see bad accidents on the road so yeah big time

83. Fallen for a friend: no

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84: Yourself: uh

85. Miracles: eyeah

86. Love at first sight: not really??

87. Santa Claus: i know he’s out there.

88. Kiss on the first date: nah

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: @equusoils that binch

91. Eye color: like blue grey

92. Favorite movie: THE IRON GIANT i would watch it every hour for the rest of my life its so good and i love it

tagging uhhh @zangapf @big-stupid-jellyfish @shrubbot @darvobek @biamblonyx and im like half coherent rn so i probably forgot someone but if u wanna do it say i tagged u

#also i really hope the read more worked bc this is Long #i need a new tag #about me #sort of i guess so

[ouik]

long rant warnin!! also very mean rant!!

i know i said that i wouldnt get angry or go through the “angry phase” of a break up but im definitely angry. not because my mind is doing some defense mechanism where i try to make you out as a bad person to cope with the breakup, but because you genuinely are a bad person and im realizing now that it was a mistake to even date you.

i dont really check up on my ex at all, unless his image shows up on my instagram, but even then i kinda just move along.. but i recently decided to look and also look at the person he cheated on me with and just …. I JUST… cant believe i ever felt insecure because of these people… im just so full of anger and im dumbfounded!! theyre UGLY!!! why did i ever…. put myself down because of them??? wtf im so angry at myself! why didnt i just fight them? why didnt i just cuss both of them out and move along with my life?? why am i such a big fat baby 😒 “love” really does make you blind and im putting “love” in quotations because it wasnt love.. i never ever loved him. it was just because i was super insecure and wanted approval… and because he wouldnt always give me that approval, i felt like i had to keep trying to get it which resulted in me staying with him for an even longer period of time. i never loved him and i dont love him as a person even now.. i convinced myself that i did because i just wanted everything to be cool but now i really dont care if hes successful and he would always say “youre gonna regret breaking up once i become a big producer” and its like.. bro… i really dont give a fuck. the only thing ill regret is dating you in the first place. you being rich in the future doesnt change the fact that youre the worst person to have ever entered my life. you fuckin suck and i pray that i can forgive all the shit that youve done to me.. im over mimi and im over cadence. its whatever. but you yourself are a shitty person and youll always try to make up for that fact but you never will be able to because youre just an immature kid who will always remain an immature kid. youll never grow but youll always act like youre “grown” because you know what the “right” answers are but youre never gonna feel it in your heart. im definitely being meaner than usual because im angry but im angry for a reason. you completely broke me down as a person and YOU MADE ME CONSIDER SUICIDE MANY TIMES. i always kept that a secret and never wanted you to feel guilty but idc anymore because it is what it is. im stupid for staying with you and i wish i could go back in time and tell myself to never ever waste any time with you as a lover and even as a friend. you are the absolute worst and these are my feelings right now. hopefully i can become a more grown person in the future but you better pray that i can find it in my heart to forgive all of the shit you put me through. you have all these people believing youre a great, funny guy but youre just so ordinary and you dont consider anyones feelings but your own.. i really hope the next girl that enters your life can have the willpower to be patient with you… “youll always have a special place in my heart” dude stfu every fuckin girl that gave you the time of day has a special place in your heart. that means nothing to me which is why i didnt say anything when you told me that. you have a place in my heart but not a good one. youll always be that burden on my mind and heart. the burden being the fact that i ever tried to make things work and the fact that i would beat myself over the shit you put me through. you will always have that place in my heart until i fuckin get rid of it through God

#personL #personal

[dualitysdownfall]

It's 12:25 am and I tried to go to sleep but it didn't work so i'm getting really hot in my bed and i'm gonna type about a bunch of stuff

I think if im trying to go to sleep then its probable The Worst Time to be typing out thoughts and rants on my phone but idc

You know that icky fuzzy stuff that gets on your teeth if you don’t brush them? Well i forgot to brush my teeth before going to bed and it’s too late to go out of my room again because there’s a baby sleeping in my house and if i wake up the baby i’ll end up waking up everyone. So i can’t go next door of my room to brush my teeth and i know the fuzzy stuff will irritate me, not to mention guilt me for not brushing my teeth, unless i get it off. So I picked it off with my fingernails. Ended up drooling on my pillow. Small price to pay I guess. I did still feel kinda bad about not ~genuinely~ brushing them, but then I thought. Hey, they didn’t have toothpaste in the caveman days, and cavemen still had teeth, right? So it won’t kill me if I don’t brush my teeth for a couple days. It’s kinda bad, but not life-ruining.

I’m a really picky eater and all my tastes tend to favor things that are more sweet or just less healthy, as most people’s do. I do genuinely want to be healthy, but it’s kind of hard changing that when you’re not the one buying the groceries, and my mom’s idea of healthy dinner is my idea of ew. So as I was trying to sleep just now, I started thinking about how I want to eat healthy, and so to prove a point to myself, and maybe my parents if it ever comes to that, I started compiling a list of healthy foods I like. Fruits, veggies, more healthful versions of regular foods I eat, etc.

While we’re on the topic of health, exercise for me is a different story. Whereas I do actually have healthy foods I like, there are very few exercises I enjoy. I bet I could count them on one hand. I like walking, swimming, rollerskating…. and that’s about it. …Y'know, come to think of it, I’d do those a lot more—by choice, even—if I had roller skates and a pool at home. (This sentence clearly indicates that I don’t.) Maybe I’ll ask for roller skates for my birthday. Maybe I’ll have my party at the roller rink. My cousin did that once: had his birthday at the roller rink and then got skates as a present. My sister used to like roller skating just around the house. She did it while she read books for school. It was interesting. I hope she looked up so she didmt run into things.

I’m listening to music instead of YouTube right now. My phone charger is downstairs, so I have lowbattery mode on even though its at 86%. Trying to make it last through the night because i dont have a second charger upstairs. Well i do but it’s old and hasn’t worked for years. I don’t know why I haven’t just thrown it away yet. I should do that...

It's really hot in my bed and I’m starting to sweat but I’m not gonna take the covers off because they’re blocking my view of the smoke detector’s light in the corner of my ceiling and I’m scared of smoke detectors (and the sound they make, and fire, and…)

I’ve always been scared of death. I don’t know what will happen after i die. Where will I go? What will I have to do or have done to me? I didn’t used to be so unsure of what I believed in. But when I was little I was still scared of being sent to hell. I wasn’t sure if I was meeting the requirements necessary to go to heaven. Now that I’m older I realize I don’t HAVE to believe what I was taught as a child. But I don’t know what I DO believe, and so for all I know once I die I’ll just float around, alone, endlessly, in the darkest depths of the universe… infinitely. Doesn’t sound fun.

I don’t want to be thinking about that at 12:51 AM, but here I am.

I should really go to sleep… but I can’t… and now I’m all hot and my arms are sore from holding up my phone and my mind is awake from using my phone…. I really should have thought this through.

I always wanted to try packing a backpack for a day or two and basically run away from home but it wouldn’t be running away from home because running away from home implies you needed/wanted to get away from your home situation, but that’s not what I mean. I just … the challenge of trying to fit clothes and water and money and other essential stuff into a backpack and then trying to survive on your own for a bit just appeals to me. Though I suppose those who have had to do it, as a necessity rather than a challenge for fun, would beg to differ.

I’m hungry.

Why did I let myself stay up so late? I really need to break this tendency to stay up this late, before it becomes irreversible.

In theory I really like being up late. It’s quiet and peaceful and you can pretty much do whatever. But in practice, the darkness and the silence creep me the heck out and the later it gets, the more guilty i feel for not going to sleep.

Coincidentally it just became 1 AM.

So I’ve been playing loads of Tetris lately, and I know the “tetra” in “Tetrimino” means four. Like how tetriminos are made of four squares. But what about the “mino”? Is it like, amino? Like amino acids? Tetrimino acids? I wonder

If I were to visit another country, I’d want it o be an English-speaking country, because while I’d like to learn new languages, I worry that upon going there, where people speak that language instead of English, I’d need a word for something and not know what it is or how to say it. You could tell me after a few years of studying that I was fluent enough to get around well enough and make small talk, but even just simple chatting can get complex.

The differences in American English and British English are interesting. There are different words for things sometimes. Like what an American would call pants, a British person would call trousers, etc. I’m sorta fascinated by British accents but if I tried to fool people and do one I’d probably use an American word and they’d figure me out

I don’t have any particular reason to want to do things like run away from home for a day or pretend I have a British accent. If I were to do them—not saying I will—my only reason would be “to see if I could”.

My art ability comes in two modes: Pretty Good and Meh. The usual setting is Meh: My sketches are OKAY, but not fantastic, and usually stay as sketches because I lack the control, patience, etc to do anything impressive with pens or markers. Then, very very rarely, the switch flips to Pretty Good. Now I am very able to use things like micron pens amd make interesting outlines with them, my sketches are spot-heckin-on, and I can use my markers quite effectively. However, this rush of artistic skill only lasts about one to two drawings. An example of a drawing made while that was happening is my gemsona Grape Agate, whose post people are still occasionally reblogging for some reason. I’m not sure why this weird inconsistency in my art skills happens. People will probably just say, it’s all in your head, you’re not trying, etc, but I don’t think it’s in my control. Though I’m sure some adjustments to my mindset couldn’t hurt in the moment while I’m getting ready to draw.

I’m going to keep typing about things until I get too tired to keep going.

There’s this thing called Pearlmethyst Week coming up and I want to participate by drawing something for each day of the week. The issue with that is, I want to draw using my mom’s display tablet that she has for her computer. She seems hesitant to let us kids use it during the day, so we’ve taken to using it when she’s not home or when she’s asleep. I’ve already finished and scheduled three Pearlmethyst Week drawings, but time’s running out to finish the other four and we’re going on vacation over the weekend meaning I won’t have access to the drawing tablet. I’m going to work on sketching them as much as possible until the weekend, but if I don’t get them all finished before we have to go, then I’m considering bringing my copics and microns on the trip and drawing them traditionally in my spare time.

I'm starting to zone out and not want to move my fingers. Maybe im finally falling asleep. However i am still not too lazy to correct my typos so maybe im not.

........Okay, it's now 7:47 AM and i have slept!!!!!!!! So now i'm gonna post this... cause I did want to. If you wanna chat about any of my weird thoughts, shoot me a message~

#melancholy starlight trying to go to sleep

[swearronchanel]

Who let me watch 5.06?

I should be doing an assignment that’s due tomorrow but ya know due tomorrow means do tomorrow. Lol I know I should be ashamed to be a procrastinator but university has ruined me anyway. I’m tired from literally going to one lecture haha, but in any event I’ve been rewatching mad men for the who knows what time but I thought I’d take a break from all that and watch an episode of CtM & @flyingnonny inspired me to do a reaction post so why not? I decided on 5.06 since last Sunday’s episode reminded us of that camping trip 😂😂  here goes nothing.. 

*skips intro bc I’m impatient*

Cute community moment ☺️

TRIXIE😍 slaying my life

Shelagh looks so good too 😍 and Angela melting my heart!

Why is shelagh forever wearing cardigans? I like cardigans every now and then but all the time, really?

Everyone is sitting outside, Trixie is in a sleeveless dress, as is Barbara, so it has to be warm?? take it off Shelagh

She’s still my bby though even if I don’t always agree with her fashion choices

what gross vejo pinching Trixie’s ass? That’s not ok

And Babs too lmao, creepy old man, die

Shelagh saying “hello dear” aw

But this is like the only interaction between Shelagh and Trixie & that does not suffice !!

ALL I WANT IS FOR THEM TO HAVE AN ACTUAL FRIENDSHIP IDC HOW MANY TIMES IVE SAID IT I REALLY Want it😭😭💕💕 my two fav bbys

I HAVE EVEN GIVEN REASONS WHY & I CAN GIVE THEM AGAIN ***        1) Why not?? Shelagh has like no real friends besides her husband and sort of Sister Julienne?                                                 

 2) just please, because I’m asking nicely                                                     3) When Shelagh was Sister Bernadette she was often friendly/ in the gossip and conversation with the nurses & remember that one time Trixie grabbed her to come listen to Jenny’s phone conversation?               

4) Trixie was the only one besides Sister Julienne to visit her in the sanatorium. That has to count for something!                                             5) They’ve both been on the show since day 1 & have known each other the longest (besides the nuns) why wouldn’t they be friends or least actually speak to each other?

Aye this is the lady who’s fake pregnant

Shelagh wearing earrings though >> here for it

Sorry there will be a lot of gushing over Shelagh and Trixie

And also I WANT TRIXIE’S HOOP EARRINGS SO BAD, where can I find them??

And how do I get her clothes and figure and her everything lol?

PHYLLIS ! My champion

“Would it have killed you to sit down for five minutes and eat the whole thing!” I LOVE HER, SHE IS A GEM, A HERO, A BADASS & IM NOT READY FOR SUNDAY. IM GOING TO BAWL WITH AND FOR HER

she deserves the best

I think this is the only time I’ve ever heard Trixie address Shelagh by her first name?? a prob.

They need to interact more 😭💔💕😍 I will stop saying it when I’m dead even then I’ll prob say it

Actually when I think of it no one ever calls Shelagh by her first name besides obviously Patrick? And Sister Julienne

#MoreShelaghAndTheOtherNursesInteracting2k17aka1962

And I need at least two seconds of them dotting on pregnant Shelagh

Helen looks so good like goals

“I threatened to put one man over my knee but that only encouraged him” HA IM DEAD NO KINK SHAME

I think there’s been a similar joke before but fuck it it’s still funny to me

But seriously everyone loves Trixie lol how could you not though?

Hey Pats, it’s been a while

Lol omg Tim in that uniform.. Not the best costume 😂😂

Never seen Whistle Down the Wind

But you see, Tom and Babs making out as usual, I’m not knocking it lol but this is why Sister J told her to chill when they went to South Africa😂

also lowkey jealous bc Jack Ashton is handsome af and that could’ve been me but it’s all good. He and Helen are adorable together and I’m here for it x10000

Omg I forgot this lady got assaulted

Oh shit I just remembered this is the episode where sister MC is attacked FUCK WHY DID I WATCH THIS

she can’t report it bc she’d get arrested for soliciting wtf

But remember Shelagh wore the headbands in like series 3 (so glad she stopped I was not here for it)? They must’ve gave them to Babs lol

I forgot Trixie didn’t tell the nurses about AA yet

But she looks gorgeous as ever, even with her mascara running

Lowkey nauseas looking at all that fish ugh. Funny becuase they put a grocery store that has a fish market on the block up from where I live in NYC and I hate it  

I forgot about Peter lol and he was in an episode this series whoops

LIKE WHERE’S YOUR WIFE LOL, *I know, too busy for this, I don’t think she’d fit in the series anymore anyway*

Sister Mary Cynthia 😰❣️

Lol she doesn’t sing loud enough ??

Sister Julienne is so cute when she smiles but don’t forget she’s a badass

REMEMBER THE AGGRESSIVE JACKET FLAP BC OF THE IRRITATING SISTER URSULA

How did this girl hide her pregnancy though?

And did her brothers just not realize she was pregnant and the mother wasn’t?

Oh jeez my cousin was a colic-y baby and my parents kept him like 3 days a week when I was in high school & it was a nightmare. I didn’t sleep for so long

Dont get me wrong I love babies. But when they scream when I’m trying to sleep, nope. Return to sender.

Shelagh is so excited about camping it’s the purest and most adorable thing 😭😭And I like her shirt  

Shelagh made Tim copy the napkin folding from a magazine, SHE IS A GEM

“We never have serviettes on a weeknight” wtf did they just not use napkins every day? I’m confused Lmaoo. What am I missing here 😂omg that reminds me of one of the times my family and I went on a cruise (2006, hella long time ago already wow?? 11 yrs yikes) and my brother & cousin were late to dinner and lied to my mom & aunt saying they were at a “napkin folding class” & my family deadass believed it up until 2 years ago😂

Shelagh’s accent is so cute. I’ve said that many times but it’s so sweet. But again why do we just have to accept she’s Scottish with no context as to how/why she came to England? Like I’m sure there were convents in Scotland. I dont even care that much I just will forever be curious as to why it seems she had no life before she got married lol? Like they don’t ever bring up the fact she was a nun, but ok maybe she feels awkward talking about it but what about before? 

They’re so excited it’s so precious, protect this family 😂😭💕💕

Sister MJ is fasting lol I should try it😂

Omg another dumb story, I didn’t realize today is Ash Wednesday and was hella confused seeing some people with ash on their forehead 😂😂 I should give up something for lent but idk what, we shall see. My mom gave up carbs last year & I died bc I lived at home and ate what she cooked and almost all my fav foods are carbs😂

Shelagh referred to Patsy as Patsy, I’ve only ever heard her say Nurse Mount??

lol Tim you’re what 14? you know damn well those arent* bullet holes

at least he has some of his innocence still. I didn’t @ 14

Sometimes I forget I’m gonna be 19 this year wtf. I’ve accidentally told people I’m 16 before and had to correct myself 😂😂

Patrick is excited about this holiday, boy you don’t know what’s coming 😂

HE’S GONNA ATTACK THE LADY WITH A BABY I FORGOT THAT TOO WTF

I wanna fight him

Diane’s anemic ? Or her mum is just assuming

SHELAGH IN HER CAMPING OUTFIT!! The hair scarf and trousers !! I’m so here for it 😍😭

I want to see her in another pair!! yes lets get it 1962. Probably not likely this series but hopefully next series!! Ah can’t wait

Shit this series is almost over 💔💔 but omg 1963 gonna be lit as well?!

Like the space race started/orbiting the earth, Kennedy’s assassination .. wait never mind lol I’m thinking of American History moments. but still a lot of it was crazy world news so maybe it’s mentioned?? first bond film came out in'63, petition for Tim to go take Susan whatever from around the corner to see it since we know he liked the novels

Lots of famous films came out in ‘63 so there’s gotta be some reference.

Fun fact: I love pop culture references in period drama bc I’m lame jk I’m majoring in education (to teach history)

Old news but still relevant: Phyllis’s turn on: Rolodex systems 📇

“CRANE, as in the wading bird or industry lifting equipment, whichever you prefer” LOVE U PHYLLIS, YOU CORRECT HIM

PHYLLIS’S FACE WHEN GODFREY SUGGESTS SHE CAME OUT OF RETIREMENT, IM DEAD

“I shall consider retirement when I’m at the appropriate age”  IM LAUGHING SO HARD, FUCK YEA PHYLLIS. I LOVE HER SO MUCH, LINDA BASSET IS ON THE LIST WITH LAURA AND HELEN OF PEOPLE WHO COULD PUCH ME IN THE FACE AND I’D THANK

LOL SHELAGH JUST STANDING AWKWARDLY LISTENING TO THIS CONVERSATION

“Buenos vacaciones”  I NEED MORE PHYLLIS WORKING ON HER SPANISH I LOVE IT, Ella es oro.

lol the roof rack, bet it was Phyllis’s they borrowed when they moved

PHYLLIS’S FACE OF DISGUST WHEN DR GODFREY SMILES AT HER IS ME ALWAYS

LOL THE THE NURSES & SISTER WINIFRED DYING OVER PATRICK’S SHORTS (EVen though sister W “swears she’s not looking”)

I THINK THE SOCKS AND WHITE DAD SANDALS ARE MORE AMUSING 😂😂

Poor Judith💔

It’s a vicious attack Sister J! But you don’t know it yet so I get u

Here comes summer..😂

SETTING UP IN THE POURING RAIN LOL

Shelagh and Angela being adorable !!

Tim and Patrick proud that  they set the tents up & boom it falls 😂 which is symbolic for me taking exams, I think I did well or at least decent on them and then I find out I failed by like 5 points

Nonnatus table scenes <3 😭

”I’ve seen more dangerous marshmallow bunnies“ lmao Pats this is a serious moment I shouldn’t laugh

Shelagh took off her glasses 😉😏 but fr how is Laura Main so perfect

Patrick put scotch in its lit, pass it over😏

Lol Shelagh drinking is a strange thought but I’m so here for it. Nuns can’t drink right? Idk. Imagine her drinking alcohol for the first time and just getting drunk 😂 we know Patrick and Tim are lightweights getting drunk off one beer so I assume shelagh would too😂

Damn it Patrick, you spilled your cup. Furthermore proving you’re a disaster 😭

LMAO SHELAGH’s “WTF” FACE WHEN SHE ASKS PATRICK WHAT HE’S THINKING ABOUT AND HE SAID THE ULCER CLINIC

LIKE C'MON PATRICK YOU KNOW WHERE SHELAGH WAS TRYNA GO WITH THAT😂

“And if you don’t mind my saying so, you’re not exactly Cliff Richards yourself” SHELAGH 😂😂 another great line of hers, love it

I love their playful banter lol we need more of that 😂 but lets be real series 6 has had some of the greatest Shelagh and Patrick moments so I can’t complain 😭😍

Peter and Barbara is such a unusual dynamic haha

“How is chummy?” Wait does Babs even know Chummy? I don’t even remember if they met tbh

But for real Shelagh did you really think Patrick would just forget about work completely ??

Lol Angela crying because she is petrified of squirrels😂😂and Shelagh running to her is so cute.

Why didn’t she just get rid of the *creepy* squirrel nutkin book? it seemed like they still had it in series 6 haha

rice pudding is I think the same as aroz con leche, lol it’s gross sorry

Diane’s water broke oh shit

the Turners all in the tent playing I spy bc it’s raining haha

I went camping for the first and last time this past summer w/ my sister in laws & her friends, it was awful 😂😂 I got like 100 mosquito bites that became welts, i literally slept in the car the second night & it was mid July fairly south of east coast aka it was humid and sticky af , there were wild horses that walked around..Thank God they brought alcohol cause it was a nightmare I don’t wanna remember 😂😂

ANGELA IS SO CUTE UGH & ANOTHER GREAT SHELAGH FACE😂

lol yes go to a hotel, should’ve done that from the get

So what exactly does Fred run? some civil defense thing?

She’s in labor and can’t even scream omg, I’m screaming

“They are often incorrect in their opinion” Sister MJ is a gem. I want someone to look at me the way Sister MJ looks at cake and the television

Phyllis yelling at Dr Godfrey😂

PATS’S FACE OF DISGUST IS ALSO ME

HOW DO THESE WOMEN GIVE BIRTH STANDING/SITTING UP?? AHHHH

There you are Beatrix, it’s been a while

Patsy being suspicious with the card game line lol. but when is Trixie going to find out about Patsy and Delia?

SHE RIPPED OUT HER WOMB?! WTF OMG IM SCREAMING

THIS HURTS TO WATCH AHH

Trixie and Sister MC to the rescue but omg this is wild I forgot

Fred wtf you can’t be sneaking up like that

DONT LEAVE SISTER MC ALONE TRIXIE

NOO, IM NOT PREPARED FOR THIS

“There are flowers on the table, and feathers in these pillows, that’s all the nature I need to get back to” I feel you Patrick lol, I like nature but not camping

Lol remember Shelagh’s old nightgown? ah I don’t miss it. The bri nylon is such a look™ & obviously has magically powers i.e this miraculous conception.

“..or they’ve been mulled to death by squirrels” IM DEAD HAHA THAT WAS A GOOD DAD JOKE, NICE ONE PATRICK

aw the baby is so precious

Why is the operating room/being in surgery called theatre in the U.K.?? and why is the doctor’s office/practice called the surgery? so many questions from a confused American..

Sister MC by the docks😭💔 she was just chillin with God and THIS HORRIBLE MAN RUINS EVERYTHING WTF UGH

Oh no

SISTER MC JUST UNCONSCIOUS ON THE DOCKS WTF IM CRYING WHY WOULD HURT HER

Patrick even if you were there she wouldn’t have called you, don’t blame urself

it’s not your arrogance sister MC!!

“don’t you even say the word fault, do you hear me, I won’t allow it” 😭💔 it’s NOT your fault sister MC 😰

I forgot how upset/hurt this episode makes me

“The worst thing is that I actually stopped to pray…” my heart hurts

You can’t even blame her for being angry😪

Judith you’re not a bad mother!! This isn’t your fault either

Sister MJ IN THE BATHROOM WITH HER😢😢💔💔 I’m c r y i n

I SAID PROTECT THEM AT ALL COSTS WHY DID THEY HURT ME LIKE THIS

Everyone so quiet at the table..

ILL FOREVER BE PROUD OF HOW BRAVE SISTER MC IS FOR SPEAKING UP FOR HER AND THE OTHER VICTIMS💖😭💔

Russian prison tats??

“I thought at first it was a test of faith, but it was a test of strength. I can bear more than I ever though I could and I can bear it for others because my strength is a gift, from him..” brb sobbing

I feel so bad for Mrs Hills bc I understand she thought she was doing the right thing and was trying to protect her daughter from the stigma & judgment from having a baby born outta wedlock 😭

But damn she almost killed her & now she can’t have any more kids

“I’m a mum, mum” Aw

lol I want children (obviously not anytime soon) but if I do Ima be shook for the rest of my life. Like my kids will  be like grown & I’ll still wake up like wtf I had them?  Lmaoo

SHELAGH’S GREY DRESS >>😍

Patrick jumping on the bed was cute lol

The Turners being cute and an unrealistically perfect family together as usual

Trixie 😍off to her AA💕

“I think it’s about time I came clean..”

Im so proud of her omg. She’s come so far in 6 series 😭💖💖😭

And Patsy and Delia are supportive yess👏🏼

“New truths were being spoken at Nonnatus house, but some remained concealed. While one voice rose, striving to erase its agony in song.”

Thanks Vanessa,, The End 😭

#call the midwife #lets get it 1962 #I'm too attached to this beautiful show #like TRASH for this show #my commentaries™

[stinkrascal]

Ok so I was thinking about your sims again 👉🏾👈🏾 and um ok so ik you said tarek's love language is romantic acts of service, but what about the others? Also like what would be their ideal first date? And how would they react to other people flirting with their partner? Like ik vlad would commit a murder, but what about brie 👀 ?

i actually listed all their love languages here!! but ideal dates?? jealousy??? OMG!! im gonna ramble so hard!! so i’ll put all this under a cut :’)))

vlad - a) vlad’s ideal date would be like... an idyllic picnic in a field, listening to soft music, chillin in the sun n eatin fruit n drinkin wine :-) all that sappy shit!! b) u know vlad. he will unalive u if u disrespect his wife. the truest simp. but anyways yes he is a very jealous person, sometimes it’s a little excessive and brie has to yell at him, to which he eventually realizes that he’s being unreasonable and he’ll step back. he really doesn’t try to be that way, sometimes he honestly just can’t help it. since he was alone for centuries, he’s extremely over protective of his family and can find pretty much any reason to dislike any man who so much as glances in breanna’s direction. his jealousy never stems from fear that breanna will cheat on him, but more so from his belief that pretty much every man on the planet is trying to bed his wife LMAO lowkey breanna loves the attention :’))

breanna - a) honestly, she’s very easy to please. just get takeout n get in bed n smoke a bowl n watch movies with her n she will be happy! ;w; b) brie is surprisingly not that jealous, like if someone finds vlad attractive shes like... well of course? look at him? Lmaoooo. unless someone poses a significant threat to their relationship, she doesnt see a reason to get worked up. like she knows how hard vlad simps u know, this man canonically KILLED her ex-boyfriend to be with her so like? she doesnt feel any reason to get upset if someone finds vlad attractive, bc she knows at the end of the day her husband is crazy obsessed w her and her alone so like <3

lucien - a) winery art galleries!! u know like where you go to art exhibits that have wine tastings!!!! sometimes they have those cute delicious tiny little cheeses that r just so good n fancy!!! going to that, then maybe takin a stroll around the park in the evening, then ending the night w a home-cooked meal. b) hes a touch possessive, but its all in good faith :’) if someone flirts with his WIFE he only feels it necessary that he puts them in their place and lets them know that she is, in fact, MARRIED!! like vlad, a true simp

gen - a) skatepark at night, long past closing time. its oddly serene, despite the faint threat of being caught. gen personally finds the parks lingering smell of cigarettes and weed very comforting. b) they r passive-aggressively jealous. they say theyre not a jealous type, but if the girl theyre talkin to is talkin to someone else, theyre like... ok. 😒😒😒

carlile - a) chiefin big rips then going to eat at a buffet....... he will eat so many frog legs like so fucking many!! then goin to see a movie in one of those big movie theaters and seein like a marvel movie or whatever. just somethin trite and theatrical with many, many explosions. b) not aggressively jealous, but his insecurities can sometimes get the best of him in arguments and sometimes he projects his fears that tarek will leave him for someone else, which isnt good u know but like :(( what can u do

nikolai - a) waking up with the sun and traveling to the largest museum he can find, followed by brunch at some hole-in-the-wall café tucked away in the city. the long drive home is spent listening to low-quality psychedelic indie rock, and when he and abigail arrive home, they nap for at least three hours. b) nikolai’s not really a jealous type, and abigail’s pretty clingy, so he doesn’t really have a reason to be jealous. although, when he's severely provoked, he’s prone to that tone of voice where it sounds as though you can’t choose between screaming, or crying.

klaus - a) perusing the local record shop, buying as many used vinyl he can possibly fit in his book sack, and listening to the new purchases in the dim-lit light of his bedroom while talking and napping in between. if he’s really into you, he’ll sing your favorite song—he might even play it on the guitar, too, if he can remember the chords. b) again, not much of a jealous type. most of his relationships have been nothing more than flings anyways, so he doesn’t often have the attachment to someone that would make him jealous, seeing as his relationships are often not exclusive.

anastasia - a) a long, early-morning walk through the aquarium, taking an extra long break to observe the sea turtles swimming about their tanks. she’ll gladly share all of her expansive sea turtle facts with you, if you promise to buy her a stuffed animal from the gift shop. afterwards, strolling downtown to shop in all the antique stores, then ending the date with lunch at her favorite restaurant. pls just let her talk your ear off and she’ll be satisfied. b) annie’s actually REALLY possessive, especially over her friends. she’s the type of person who will get offended if anyone else tries to say vaughn and caspian are their best friends, because, no? those are HER best friends? she’s never had a boyfriend before, but she can imagine she’d be just as possessive, if not more possessive, over someone she loved romantically. she takes from vlad :’)

ilya - a) he is literally like 1 yr old. he doesnt go on dates silly. when hes old enough to go on dates his dream date will be committing arson together <3 so romantic b) im sure he’ll be jealous af when hes older unless i forget u know we’ll see whenever he ages up yeah!!!!!!

bonnie - a) moving all the furniture in the living room, turning the radio up extra loud, and dancing to old-timey music!! then cooking a nice, healthy meal at home and watching reality tv while doing face masks. maybe ending the night w a nice bath fit for two <3 b) especially with her pregnancy, she’s been VERY jealous lately!! small things can trigger her jealousy, and sometimes she finds it difficult to be her usual, rational self when those feelings arise. luckily, it’s very easy to talk her out of this state, so she gets over these fits of jealous relatively quickly ;-;

 tarek - a) driving out into the forest, setting up tents in the middle of nowhere, and snuggling tight beside the crackling fire while watching the night settle. then waking early the next morning to go for a small hike towards the natural lakes scattered about. if carlile is too tired to walk, tarek simply carries him. :’)) b) level-headed as he is, jealousy doesn’t come to him often. it would take a lot to provoke him, and his relationship with carlile is so secure that he doesn’t really feel there’s a need to be jealous

abigail - a) midday trips to the mall with nikolai’s credit card in hand as he shamelessly lets her pick out anything she wants from any store she can possibly enter. she’s always sure to pick out a few outfits she’s certain he’ll love :’)). then going to get smoothies, yes nikolai’s paying for the smoothies too <3 b) abigail is extremely jealous, though she’s desperately trying to ease this habit. especially with nikolai moved to britechester, living with a female roommate, her jealousy often gets the best of her, and believe me when i say it isn’t pretty. she’s prone to dramatic outbursts, and she’ll even feel the urge to enact revenge (aka, cheat on you) if she feels you’ve truly cheated on her. she has to see and speak to nikolai often to have peace of mind, but even then, she often has her moments of insecurity. :((

caspian - a) watching some indie art film at a drive-in movie theater, binging on over-buttered popcorn and gas station hot dogs. if the weather allows for it, then he’ll lay a blanket out on the bed of his truck and lie back with his date, gazing at the stars, rambling about nothing. b) he’s a jealous type, but he doesn’t like admitting it. the truth is, though, it kills him to see someone he cares about with someone else. its just that he doesnt know how to express those feelings, so he often just shoves them away as if they dont exist at all. ;n;

vaughn - a) listen to him perform at one of his concerts, then let him fuck you in one of the bathroom stalls. a true romantic, i know. b) most of vaughn’s relationships are no-strings-attached anyways, so its rare for him to get jealous over a relationship thats already open to begin with. even when he did have partners in the past, he was never the type to be overly protective of his significant other

cooper - a) ok idc about cooper HAHA so like idk nobody is taking this man on a date anyways who cares. idk smoke a bowl with him in his car then go eat at a fancy restaurant that sounds like a very cooper bauer date to have yeah ok we’ll go with that b) he gets jealous but like in a baby way u know. if he thinks you’re into someone that isn’t him he’ll just bawl his eyes out and be like WHY DON’T YOU LOVE ME ANYMORE!!!!!!!!! IS IT BECAUSE IM ONLY 5′6″!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yes cooper it is because youre only 5′6″ im sorry short king

wolfgang - a) going around his neighborhood late at night and poking holes in all the tires parked in the streets. yes, that’s super illegal. no, he doesn’t care. yes, this is considered a date for wolfgang. keep up. afterwards, maybe he’ll sneak you up to his bedroom so you guys can watch rick and morty... cuddle. b) i feel like im gonna spoil something if i answer this fully. so. lets just say. Yes he is very jealous :)

#nonnysims #jade answers #GODDAMN MY FINGIES HURT TYPIN ALL THIS #straud asks

[mani-mari]

Misfits season 3 spoilers

sadjakhfdaj!!!! ahjdkabn!!! OKAY-- I-- AFSJFNAJNS

I can’t think a proper sentence because I keep interrupting my own thoughts with fangirling whisper-squeals ahhhhh

spoilers past this point!

I’m only 11 minutes in to episode 3 and I’m already fangirling I can’t . I can’t.

HE ASKED HIM IF HE WANTED TO BE HIS BEST FRIEND

SIMON IS SO PURE FUCK FUCK

WHAT’S THE OTHER GUY’S NAME?? WE GOTTA KNOW

“My name is-” “nobody cares” SHUT UP CREEP I HATE THE PROBATION WORKER

OK TIME TO CONTINUE WATCHING BEFORE I RUN OUT OF TIME LOL

IF I GO BACK TO REACTING TO WHAT HAPPENS I sorry caps I’ll just start the reaction with --, just like the previous post.

-- his name is peter okay nice

boy Alisha is pissing me off this episode.

1. Simon has a friend

2. Simon is allowed to have friends

3. the way he pets his hair when he’s nervous, I love him. I love him. I love this show

4. Peter... Peter is so cute......... im sorry

-- HE IS SHOWING PETER THE BASE? NO, NO, DON’T DO THAT-- OH NO.

ohhhh no he told him about Future!Simon

Simon you know the rules. I know Peter’s your Bestie-For-Life but there are BOUNDARIES, my guy. You can’t go sharing your whole life with him. Yikes.

“Why don’t you wear a bulletproof vest?” HERE WE GO HERE’S THE BIG REVEAL AND FILLING THE PLOT HOLE LET’S HEAR IT, SIMON!

“[Then she won’t fall in love with me and I won’t become him and everything will change.] it all has to happen exactly like it did”

i- I mean I guess so but you’re a little wrong like- I still think Future!Simon could have left forever instead of just DYING. I mean he didn’t even die in his own timeline, he had to go back in time and die. That’s so SAD bro. I love Future!Simon and Simon himself and it’s WACK that he has to die. whatever I’ll take that reason I guess

-- O-OH HERE SHE COMES. WATCH OUT OR SHE’LL CHEW YOU UP. O-OH HERE SHE COMES. SHE’S A MAN-EATER.

SIMON LOOK OUT IT’S YOUR GIRLFRIEND

i- Alisha. Stop, STOP, oKAY? you are being irrational and- SIMON IS ALLOWED TO HAVE FRIENDS. REFER TO NUMBER 2

wtf I’m only 17 minutes in alright I’ll try to shut up now

-- i know I just said I’d shut up but HE’S LEAVING NOW? wow. I’m not sure if I believe that though. she’s right, he was talking weirdly. but was it him or not?

-- uh- can Peter draw the future?

-- OOOOOOOOH ALISHA KNOWS

-- can Kelly’s lover not die? I know he’s a prick but she really seems to like him and there doesn’t seem to be any One-Episode-Long suspicious activity going on with him so.... I ship it

aw he’s super cute they’re super cute ahhh

-- K i hate Peter and his cute little face

-- THAT’S SO SAD SHE DIED AND HE STILL LOVES HER i- omggg bro

-- yeah Kelly your power isn’t so rubbish now is it?

-- POOR SIMON. BABY BOY

“I want you back” I - HE IS SO gmhnmf BUT ITS OKAY because Alisha SAVED her man

She was wrong to be like “he’s not your friend” because she hadn’t known the circumstances at that point-- but Peter was being a JERK the whole time smh

-- now hold on. you can’t say you won’t EVER leave her. like, you know what happens.

-- oh no. oh no. oh no. Peter’s definitely the one in the mask

WOW he had the nerve to put the Vegas photo up there. alright idiot

-- so Peter’s deaaaaad.... that suuu- is great, it’s so great, the cute one died, nice

IM SORRY he is a bad character. evil intentions. stupid idiot. but he’s cute.

-- FUCK Alisha she doesn’t understand, bro I love her but she is being such an idiot. Also Simon better not have burned that suit. He knows who he has to become!!!!!! boyyyy I swear

-- wait wtf there’s a hidden space behind the locker that’s actually sick

-- ................. bro

........... bRO

Peter- sigh. alright. Peter had like, one good intention

N- HOW DID PETER KNOW ABOUT THE HIDDEN SPACE

i- whatever idc anymore

this show is too good smh

-- I’m sorry, but what is going on in the next episode LMAOOO

the probation worker is standing in front of a Nazi flag and I could not be more confused

also snowstorm! nice

IM JOKING okAY next episode is going to be wild. Nazi episode. we don’t stan

...... can’t wait ! next week

#misfits #kelly bailey #rudy wade #alisha daniels #curtis donovan #simon bellamy #reactions