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jcbbby · 2 years

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A Chance Meeting

Heyo, this is my first time writing on here. Not sure if this is something I'll keep doing, but this was just an idea that popped in my head and I wanted to flesh it out a bit. Might be a two or three parter? I've set this in Boston, since that's where I'm at lol. Towards the end, it gets pretty rushed, sorry. I welcome any feedback!

Synopsis: By chance, you meet the person you've admired most from afar, Jamie Campbell Bower. By luck, a friendship blossoms. Or perhaps...more? Over the course of a whirlwind week, your wildest dreams start to become reality.

Warnings: None. Yet. Just like, a couple swear words.

Pt. 2 Here.

Pt. 3 Here.

-9am. Monday.-

Another day working at the museum. You had been working for a few years in the offices of the cultural institution. It was a very cool place to work, but you were working hard outside those walls on a different art form: your music; hoping for your big break one day. But that day was not today.

You shuffle your feet to your desk, bleary eyed with fatigue from your weekend playing shows at a couple bars around the city. You plop your backpack down at the floor and drop yourself into your chair to switch on your computer. You let out an audible sigh.

"Monday again, eh?" Allison, your coworker gives a pained smile.

"Indeed. How was your weekend?" You ask, mainly as a courtesy. You hadn't had coffee yet, and were not interested in conversing.

As Allison went over the activities she and her family and friends attended over the weekend. You half listened, as your mind wandered. She tended to go on and on anyway. You yawned as her story reached it's end.

"I'm gonna go grab a coffee, or three..." You stood up to head back out through the door.

Walking the streets of Boston on this sunny autumn day, you breathed in the crisp air as you glanced up at the clouds. Something about a cool breeze in the sun invigorated you, it filled you with the belief that good things were on their way to you. At least, you hoped.

You pushed open the door of the bustling Starbucks on the corner. Seeing how long the line was, you closed your eyes and sighed in annoyance. At least the soundtrack was good, currently playing "There is a Light that Never Goes Out" by the Smiths. You bobbed your head, singing quietly to yourself.

"This is a great tune, isn't it?" A warm, smooth, was it familiar? voice said from behind you in the line.

You turned, slightly embarrassed that anyone heard you. You see that the voice had come from a tall, blonde haired man in circular sunglasses. His facial features were sharp, cheek bones high, his jaw angular, a smile that lit the room. A face you would recognize anywhere, for you had seen it on screen so many times before. You inhaled sharply, an attempt to hold your breath harshly to maintain composure.

"Uh, y-yes. Awesome song." You smiled. You took a beat. "You um...sorry, you're Jamie Campbell Bower..." you said, trying to keep as cool as you could.

He smiled as he looked down and then quickly back up. "Guilty, and you are...?"

"Y/N" you answered, smiling back.

"Lovely to meet you." He offered a hand. You brought yours to meet his in a handshake.

"Sorry, I just...I'm a huge fan and...god, this is embarrassing to be doing in a Starbucks at 9am on a Monday." You snorted. "You know what, nevermind. It's just lovely to meet you as well." You smiled.

"Oh, no darling. No need to be embarrassed!" He grabbed your shoulder. "Believe me, there have been far more colorful interactions."

"I'm sure!" You chuckled as the line took a few steps forward. "So, what brings you to Boston? I have to say I'd never thought I'd just...run into you in my city. In a coffee shop."

"Oh, just some meetings really," he put his hands in his coat pockets "and I'm doing a photo shoot with a local photographer. Her schedule was a bit wonky so I've had to come here to her." His pocketed hands flared his coat outward as he gestured to the general area.

"How long are you here for?" you asked.

"Just a week. Have you got any recommendations for places I should check out while I'm here? I've been in the area once, for tour, but I didn't get to get out much aside from playing the gig."

The line moved a few more steps ahead. Your eyes went up to the left, as your head tilted to the right, scanning your brain for suggestions.

"Well, if you are into history, and there's obviously plenty of that here, you can do like, the Freedom Trail tour. If you wanted to find a nice place to go for a nice walk or run, personally, I recommend Castle Island. It used to be an old military fort centuries ago, and the fort is still there, but you can't go in. But it's a loop that goes out into the harbor and you can see planes coming in. I recommend going at sunset. It's just..." you sighed, "beautiful." you smiled. "It's one of my favorite places to just...be, I love it there."

He smiled back at you, his soft, plump lips parting to give way to gleaming teeth. "That does sound lovely!"

You were next in line to order now. You stepped up to the counter.

"Hi, what can I get started for you?" the barista asked, trying her best to be upbeat during this no doubt hellish morning rush.

"Good morning! Could I please get a venti cold brew with oat milk and vanilla?" You asked, pulling out your wallet. A ring-clad hand pushed it back down.

"It's on me, love." Jamie said, smiling.

"Oh, oh no, you don't have to do..." you stuttered.

"No, I don't, but I'd like to!" He held his smile, dipping his chin down towards his chest and tilting his eyes up at you.

"Well...o-okay. Thank you." you blushed.

He nodded, pulled his sunglasses to the top of his head, and stepped up to also order his coffee. A venti iced coffee, oat milk, and two pumps of caramel. He handed the barista his card to pay and gave his name for the order. When she handed the card back, he thanked her with a smile and told her to have a nice day. He held his arm in front of himself, gesturing you to walk in front of him over to the pick up counter. You smiled and nodded your head once, taking a step away from the counter, back towards the crowd by the pick up area.

"Thank you again," you said. "You really didn't have to!"

"Oh, don't worry about it. Thank YOU for your tourist suggestions." His eyebrows lifted, as his eyes held a look of genuine gratitude.

You nearly blushed. You had obviously seen his face before, in pictures, on camera. But in person, he was just beautiful. His pouty lips, deep ocean blue eyes, smooth skin. What on earth was his skin care routine?! You then had a thought.

"You know, another suggestion," you cleared your throat. "I actually work at the Museum of Fine Arts, around the corner. As a thanks for the coffee, I can get you in for free. I mean, if you have time, anyway."

His face lit up. "Really? Oh that would be so lovely! I haven't got anything going on at the moment, actually. Would I be able to pop over this morning?"

"Oh my god, totally! Yeah, right now would be a great time to go too. We're usually totally dead on Monday mornings, so it'd be like you have the whole place to yourself." You chuckled.

His brow furrowed. "Oh, you wouldn't be able to give me the tour?"

Your heart skipped. "You'd want me to show you around?"

"Well, I mean you are now my official Boston guide after all!" He joked.

"Two venti iceds for Jamie!" a barista called, setting down two drinks. Jamie looked up and went over to grab them.

He handed you yours. "So, I'll let you lead the way."

On the short walk back to the museum, you made small talk as you internally were losing your G-D mind over what was happening. Was this real? Was I still sleeping, waiting for my alarm to wake me up this Monday morning? How was I at such the right place at the right time. Why did he take to me so warmly and quickly? You were just a fan of his, and now you're about to have a museum date with him. Well, not a date... but one can dream.

You both walked up the stairs of the massive building that you knew very well. You walked up to the ticket desk ahead of Jamie.

"Hey Marsha!" You smiled at the ticket desk worker you had befriended over your years there. "This is Jamie, he's my guest for today. Could you print him one of my comps?"

"Oh totally. You got it, girl." Marsha said, clicking away on her computer.

Printing sounds soon followed. She handed you the small rectangle ticket. You thanked her with a salute that she also returned. You and Jamie walked up to the security guard who scanned tickets. You flashed your ID badge and reiterated that this was a guest of yours. The guard scanned the ticket and waved you both in.

"So, where do you recommend we start?" Jamie asked, looking around the rotunda and the pieces of art that lined it.

"We actually have a really cool Bosch exhibit on right now! My favorite is the Garden of Earthly Delights. It's so fucking weird." You laughed.

"I love weird, let's do it." Jamie smiled.

You laughed and beckoned him down one of the halls. You spent the next couple hours showing him around, relaying some historical facts about various paintings and artists you had learned here and there over your time working at the museum. He also shared some facts he knew as well. The whole time, it was like you were with an old friend. The organic chemistry and natural flow of your conversations and interactions. You almost forgot that he was a famous actor and rock star. For a couple hours, he was just...your new friend Jamie. You hadn't had such a good time at work in the longest time.

Standing in front of a Van Gogh, Jamie's pocket beeped and he pulled out his phone. He sighed as he looked at the screen, his eyes then looking up to you, twinged with disappointment.

"I've got to go, I'm afraid."

Your stomach sank. "O-oh. Well, duty calls, I suppose." You smiled sheepishly.

He placed a hand on your shoulder. "I've really enjoyed this, though. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your work day and showing me around. I really, really appreciate it." You could feel the warmth of his genuine gratitude.

"I've really enjoyed this too." You wondered if he could see the disappointment in your eyes too.

"Why don't I actually grab your number," he said. "You know, just in case I have any art questions while I'm here." He winked.

"Oooh, asking for my number." You smirked. He chuckled. "Yeah, for sure though. I got you on any art related emergencies." You winked and took his phone to enter your number and send yourself a text.

You walked him to the exit of the museum and he turned to you. "Thank you, again. This was really fun." He smiled.

"Thank you for the coffee." You smiled back.

He opened his arms for a hug, and you obliged. You were engulfed in his warmth. A tight, comforting hug, your head against his chest. He smelled intoxicating. A delicious cologne, mixed with a slight hint of cigarette smoke and mint.

You released each other and looked in the other's eyes. He nodded and you exchanged goodbyes. You watched him descend the step you had both walked up a couple hours prior. Watching him walked away, you stood in a daze, thinking back on the laughs you had shared. You wished you had told him how much he meant to you, how amazed you were by his talent, how much his music inspired you, how much his general outlook on life encouraged you. But perhaps that would have spoiled the time you shared. It was, after all, much nicer to spend the morning with this person who felt like an old friend, rather than the maybe 5 minutes you would have spent gawking at him in the coffee shop.

He disappeared from your line of vision as you turned to head back to your office. You checked the time on your phone. 11:23am. Shit, you thought. You fast walked back to your office.

"Oh you're alive." Allison said, monotone and not looking up from her computer. "Must have been a very large coffee."

You sat down at your desk. "Yeah. I uh, really, really enjoyed my coffee." You smirked up at her. She wouldn't believe you if you told her. Luckily, she didn't get paid enough to care about you wasting company time.

The rest of the work day, you found it so hard to focus. You checked your phone numerous times, hoping to maybe see "Jamie" pop up. But you knew he was busy doing work things, and in truth, you knew you likely wouldn't hear from him again.

-5:08pm. Monday.-

You waved goodbye to Marsha at the ticket desk as she closed up show, mouthing "thank you" to her, acknowledging the comp ticket she had given you earlier.

You walked outside, toward the train station to start your commute to your apartment. On the train, you glanced out the window as you stood, holding on to the silver poles placed throughout the crowded train. What a day it had been. The best Monday you had ever had.

As you approached the door of your apartment, you felt your pocket buzz. You took in a sharp breath, slowly reaching for the device. You had a text from Jamie. You blinked a few times, making sure your screen-saturated eyes were reading this correctly after hours staring into your work computer. Your eyes did not deceive you. You opened the text.

"Hey Y/N! I hope the rest of your day at work wasn't too bad. I thought I'd let you know that I'm interested in checking out that castle place you mentioned to catch the sunset. I thought maybe you'd like to join me if you're free? I remembered you did say it was one of your favorite spots. What do you think? x"

No way, you thought to yourself. He wanted to hang out again, in the same day? You leaned against the wall outside of your apartment as you went to formulate your response.

"Jamie! That sounds wonderful, actually. I would love to join. :)" You wrote back.

Three little dots popped up instantly. "Awesome. :) What is your address, love? I'll uber over and we can head there together. x"

You sent him the address to your apartment and finalized the timing. Hastily entering your overpriced studio apartment, you threw your bag down on your bed and rushed to freshen yourself up. You were so excited to be with Jamie again. He gave you a comfort you had never experienced with anyone else. Whatever that meant, you wanted to chase it. The idea of anything happening with him was not out of the realm of your imagination, he was gorgeous after all. But even if you ended up becoming true good friends from this chance encounter, that would mean the world to you.

--------------------------------------------

End of part one! Let me know if you're interested in a part two. I don't think this is going to go beyond three parts. Things may get smutty too, as a warning... but uh... yeah lemme know what y'all are feeling! Thanks for reading. :)

#jamie campbell bower #jamie campbell bower x reader #jamie campbell bower imagine #jamie campbell bower x you #jamie campbell bower fanfic #001 stranger things #jcb #jamie bower #peter ballard #vecna #a chance meeting

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so-mordor-itis · 2 years

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DANDELION WITH EDDIE PLEASE

Nevermind I did it twice I can't believe this.

Dandelion - finally hearing the other person laugh after a period of hardship

Staying overnight in an trailer that wasn't his own didn't sit right with him. Sure, Eddie did suggest the idea--helped hot wire the damn thing--and while in the moment it seemed badass, the aftermath of guilt crushed him hard.

There was no way he was sleeping well tonight. Or even at all.

Eddie sat up from the small couch, he took in his surroundings. Max and Lucas were close to one another, Lucas's hand was slightly reaching towards Max's; he most likely tried to hold her hand but then decided not to. Eddie almost smiled at that.

You were asleep besides Dustin (who was snoring, the little shit). You were leaning against your hand, using it as a pillow. Eddie thought it was cute, honestly. You were letting Dustin take up most of the space, attempting to sleep sitting up.

Steve and Nancy were sitting up front, most likely trying to do what you were doing. Eddie rolled his eyes. Harrington was so obvious it even made him want to throw up.

Deciding he needed a smoke, Eddie quietly--well, attempted to be--stepped outside, dodging Dustin's foot.

He took out a packet he had in his back pocket, and lit a cigarette. He took a drag before blowing smoke into the air.

The trailer door creaked a little behind him, making Eddie turn around to see your figure. "Rough night?"

"Something like that," Eddie replied, "Trying to sleep on a tight, shitty little couch with Henderson snoring like a motor isn't exactly the easiest thing in the world."

You snorted. "Tell me about it. I had to fight him for that damn spot."

"I heard the the argument you two had, pretty hilarious."

"I'm gonna sock him one day." You mumbled. "Not today though, he deserves the credit." You bobbed your head to the side. "Well, some of it."

You glanced at the cigarette in his hand and sighed. "Do you have any extra?"

Eddie nodded before tossing his packet at you. There was only one left.

"You sure I can have it?" You asked, eyebrows raised. Eddie just shrugged.

"You dealt with Dustin’s crap, think of it as a trade."

"Thanks," you said. "I'll definitely need it after this week."

"Nothing can surprise me anymore," Eddie admitted.

After lighting your cigarette, a mutual silence fell over you two. Eddie liked the quiet, reminded him of when he would be tuning his guitar, his uncle's TV making soft noises in the background. They were never too loud, and he wondered if his uncle did that on purpose.

Eddie heard you snicker. "I don't know about you, Eddie, but seeing Harrington shirtless with a hairy chest like that was surprising to me."

Eddie let out a laugh. "Oh my God, I know!"

"He said he thinks it'll get the ladies. Personally, I immediately want to disagree."

"That wasn't hair, it was a goddamn jungle." Eddie chuckled. "Even I wouldn't let it get that bad."

"No?" You smiled at him, and his heart leapt. Under the moonlight, your face glowed, and your eyes sparkled--though, he noticed they always did when you talked to him.

"Nah," Eddie shook his head, suddenly feeling his cheeks warm. "I don't want to my chest to turn into something from Teen Wolf."

At that you laughed, pretty loudly. You covered your mouth with the hand that didn't have the cigarette in it. "Shit, I'll wake everyone up!"

His heart did a flip again, and he found himself grinning like an idiot.

"Honestly, I hope you wake Harrington up. I might make him shave."

|Tags:|

@masterofmunson , @inaflashimagine , @corrodedcoffeen , @ghosttownwherenoonegoes

#stranger things #stranger things spoilers #stranger things imagines #stranger things x reader #stranger things season 4 #eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie munson x reader #joseph quinn #my writing

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urfavnegronerd · 9 months

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i'm old fashioned- ileane woods

sum slight

parings: pavitr prabahakar x shy black fem military brat reader

warnings: grammarly edited as per usual, mentions of racism, swearing i think? nun too serious

w/c: 1.35k ish

published: august 9, 2023

song lyrics are italicized

i’m old fashioned

Moving to Mumbattan was a huge change. With your Dad in the Navy SEALS you’d gotten used to moving around frequently, never in one place for too long, however, this station seemed like it would last longer than the others. It was scary and you were scared shitless, in a strange new place that seemed to be plagued with bumper-to-bumper traffic, the first thing on your mind was how people would receive you. Sure you’d lived in many places, however not all of them were as accepting of Black girls as they could be. You’d fried your hair down to the roots, essentially forcing yourself to press it every Sunday before the new week of school, and then decided to big chop. Like, big chop, full send, and shave all your hair off. Was it the best choice to shave it all off in a predominantly white Deep South? Fuck no. But it was the push you needed. That was two or three years ago, and your hair had grown back, thick, full, bouncy, and kinky, growing to just under your triple-pierced ears.

This move felt different though. You were much more jittery.

“Dad, my stomach hurts, do I have to go today? Can’t I start tomorrow?”

“Listen soldier, if you’re gonna do something, do it scared,”

“But Dad–”

“No buts kiddo, you have your uniform all ironed out?”

“Yes, sir,”

“And starched?”

“Oh jeez, Dad do you want me to look like an old lady?”

“See, you’re sassy still. You’re fine,”

“But–”

“What’s this about?”

“What if they don’t like my hair?”

“Your hair looks fine,”

“Yeah to you! You’re bald,”

“Why wouldn’t they like your hair?”

“Cus it’s… different,”

“I got clippers in the bathroom…”

“Nevermind,”

Still terrified, and anxiously gulping down the last dregs of orange juice, you pull off your bonnet and carefully inspect the lemonade braids, intricately patterned into a heart on either side of your head. Like Beyonce, you thought. Pulling the bonnet back onto your head, you grab the Mumbattan Visions Academy uniform from the hook on the bedroom door. Carefully selecting a pair of shoes, you go with navy blue retro space jams you got on a raffle, and you reappear at the bedroom mirror. Once again tugging off your bonnet, you frown at the untamed baby hairs framing your hairline. Applying a thin layer of Vaseline and sunscreen, you delicately lay down your baby hairs and fluff your eyelashes with mascara.

After what felt like hours of traffic, you arrive on campus. Horrified, you sink down in the passenger seat under your Dad’s laser glare.

“Isn’t there another school?”

“No. Go,”

“But–”

“Now.”

No room for arguments. You knew better.

“Thai food for dinner?”

“Yeah, Dad.” You smile weakly. “Thai food sounds good.”

“Do it scared, kid, do it scared.”

And then he’s off.

“Hi!”

Jumping out of your skin you turn around, eyes wide with a mixture of fright and nerves

“I’m Gayatri!” she says, sticking her hand out and beaming.

“Cool piercings,”

“Thanks, yours too!”

Half self-conscious, half flattered, you grab your earlobes and blush.

“Are you new here?”

“Yeah,”

“Welcome,”

“Thanks,”

“You’re not one for talking, are you? That’s okay, I talk plenty.”

Eagerly she snatches your hand and pulls you through the crowd of students, waving every so often.

“So, do you have your schedule?”

Nodding your head and mumbling a yeah you unfold the sheet of paper in the pocket of your polo skirt.

“Nice, we have almost every class together, except these three, but don’t worry, my friend Pavitr has these classes with you. He’s cool don’t worry,” She says, almost motherly, and begins standing on her tiptoes trying to survey the crowd. Confused, you mirror her movements, your toe caps slightly poking your pinky toes. She frantically starts to wave, you don’t mirror this movement.

“Pav! Over here!”

She practically bellows across the courtyard, the other students paying absolutely no attention to her abrupt screaming. A tall-ish boy begins to weave through the crowd, gently ‘excuse me’-ing his way through the crowd.

“Pav, this is my new best friend,”

“Replacing me already?”

“Oh, shut up,”

“Hi, I’m Pavitr.”

And the connection is almost instant.

but i don’t mind it

“Pav,” you mumble from under him, his body weight fully on top of you as you watch an old Bollywood movie he swears by. “My dad’s gonna be home soon.”

“Just five more minutes, Chittu,”

“You’ve never met a bald military man, have you?”

“He can’t be that bad,”

“Oh, my–”

You’re interrupted by the heavy steps, no doubt the hefty combat boots your father wears, coming down the hallway to the apartment.

“Pav, get off!” you whisper, shoving him off you, pulling him you're the half-moved-in bedroom the both of you tripping over empty boxes.

“Nice shoe collection,”

“Thanks,” you whisper-shout, pulling him closer to your bay window, fighting to get the fire-escape window open.

“I’m home!” Your father’s voice booms through the apartment. Scrambling with the window and finally getting it open, you frantically motion for him to climb out the fire escape, fear pulsing through your veins.

“Meri Jaan, why don’t you just introduce me to your dad?” he whispers pointedly, admittedly feeling a bit ashamed of sneaking around. But it wasn’t like the two of you were official yet, he’ll officially officially ask you out soon in a way to appease your father. No matter how difficult

“As much as I’d like to, it doesn’t quite work like that Babycakes,”

He cocks his head to the side, slightly pausing, at the use of the word ‘babycakes’.

“Southern thing, tell you about it later, get out,” you motion, still scared out of your mind, brain moving at a thousand miles per second, heart beating out of your chest. “Promise,”

“[NAME],” your father bellows

“Coming, Daddy!” you call back “Out.”

This time, you take no prisoners and gently push him out onto the fire escape. As he climbs down he pauses, pouting as you halfway close the window. Begrudgingly, you lean out and peck a quick kiss onto his lips, and then he nimbly, and incredibly quickly climbs down the fire escape.

thats how i want to be

“...And Mr, er, Lieutenant Jean-Baptiste, with your blessing, I would really like for your daughter to be my girlfriend.”

Your father sighs, the vein in the center of his forehead pronounced, and rubs his eyes.

“Prabahakar, you do realize that I am still in uniform?” This was entirely true, his medals proudly pinned to the breast pocket of his blue fatigues, your last names carefully etched into his left breast pocket, feet still clad in heavy combat boots.

“Daddy–”

“Hush, girl. Prabahakar?”

“Yes sir,”

“And I am tired,”

“Yes, sir, I can’t even imagine,”

“You cannot even begin to imagine,” he menacingly places both hands on the round kitchen table, standing. He has a good two feet on Pav.

He gulps.

Your father sighs again, eyes darting between you.

“You understand how important my daughter is to me?”

“Yes, Lieutenant,”

“What are your intentions with my daughter?”

“I–”

“Because let me find out she’s cooking a little you in her oven, it will not be a good day for you Prabahakar, I promise,”

“Daddy–”

“Hush. Do you understand me?”

Pav gulps again, clearly terrified to have gone down this route of asking permission, though he knew for a fact telling would have been worse.

“Yes, Lieutenant,”

Your father sighs warily, taking a look at your wide and hopeful eyes, then a glance at the sheer anxiety rolling off of Pavitr’s body. Breathing heavily, he rubs his cheeks. Sweet defeat.

“Her curfew during the week is 21:30. Strictly, no foolishness. On weekends I want her back exactly at 22:30. No ifs ands or buts.”

You smile something terrible and rush to hug your father.

“Thank you thank you thank you,”

Later, as the two of you are sitting on the fire escape watching the sun goes down he nudges you.

“So, your family's pretty old-fashioned then, huh?”

as long as you agree to stay old-fashioned with me.

taglist: @mayeluvsu @nagi3seastorm @hummusxx @kombuuuu @milesmolasses @n1cole-ghost @masaidabest

🩷 reblogs are always appreciated for reach <3

a/n: i think i'm gonna eventually put all my song based fics under the category 'sum slight' n e way, fill out the taglist form in my masterlist to be tagged in future works

xoxo,

rae <3

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bengiyo · 1 year

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The Warp Effect Ep 10 Stray Thoughts

With GMMTV dominating my watch calendar, it's actually becoming a bit difficult to recall everything that happened in a previous episode.

Last time, we tackled sexual health with Jedi and Rose, who had to contend with an HPV flare up in their open relationship. Over the course of the episode we questioned the nature of fidelity and safety, and learned that they likely were infected over ten years ago from other partners as the two revealed that they actually don't want their relationship to be open. Meanwhile, Nim discussed keeping the baby with Army, and also reconciled her relationship with Mollie. Elsewhere, Kim recognized that she didn't want to keep the baby at this time, and Ice spent the episode coming to terms with that and supporting his partner. Kat is back in the saddle, but Tony is a gentleman and is waiting for Jean. Alex and Jean may be on the path to speaking again.

As always, so much happens in this show.

Real shit, I want to see Jean's movie.

I don't have anything against Tony based on what we've seen, but I feel like it's a bad look for the lead to be involved with the director when they're advertising the chemistry between the leads?

I'm glad we're bringing See-ew back.

Ah, right. Liu has a handsy boss. I get her coworker choosing to accept it, but he should not be touching Liu like that and demanding she interact with him on IG.

I was lulled into a mild complacency, and now we're back to the sports homophobia plotline with Joe.

New is quite vascular.

I was not expecting Alex to just go into Liu's workplace and start a fight with her boss. What is he going to do if she gets fired as retribution?

And now we're storming back in with boxers? Why is no one talking to Liu first??

Lol, nevermind. Liu handles her own business. I want a show of just Clize whooping ass on the regular.

Okay, Mollie and Nim! Jojo said, "We are grown here. We give head."

Mollie is so valid. She just had Nim shivering from that tongue action, and now Mollie is all like, "We're just friends?" Friends don't get each other off like that. Get Tilly Birds on the line.

Okay, Silvy is so good. The aghast expression she pulled off was fantastic.

Oh, Army, I really need you to appreciate Joe's reality. Joe might lose the career that seems to provide a sense of purpose, and Army just doesn't grasp that.

"I just want the kind of love that makes me feel at ease." Me, too, Liu. Enjoying that these characters are in their late 20s, because your priorities start to shift.

The potential Kat and Jean have, only to reorient the conversation to Alex.

Really glad we're returning to Kim and Ice. In the 90s we had very special episodes about abortions and teen pregnancy, but we never lived with the fallout of the choice.

I think Ice should review his musician couple idols, because none of those relationships really worked out.

I'm gonna need the people on the internet to be respectful of Clize's feet. Still, I'm glad these two found some kind of balance.

Oh, I loved Jedi's proposal.

These dudes are going to sneer at their proposal in a queer-friendly bar? I think they should learn what bricks taste like. Give them a memorable LGBT experience.

They're not backing down? The whole bar should stomp their asses. I'll accept Jeana and Alex teaming up, and getting yelled at by the rest of the club.

Establishing that Tony has been a decent dude was a good move, because we expect him to not force an encounter on Jean after she panics. I like the way Joong plays his disappointment that they can't proceed along with his worry for Jean. I'm sure he suspects what may have happened, and knows it isn't his wound to heal.

I kinda wanna hear Phuwin play Motley Crue music now.

Mixed experiences across the squad right now.

I don't remember who Mr. Saran is, but I'm curious how the prom will act as a plot device next week.

#the warp effect #thai drama #Ben watches

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mikeys-bike-slut · 7 months

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Untitled - Sequel - PT. 5

Oh look I'm actually being active on here haha Hope you'll enjoy this chapter ^^ Monica belongs to my dear @kokonoiscoconut <3

Previous part

T.W: mild angst

***

Without even realizing Monica and I spent the entire afternoon shopping and visiting every snack and dessert shop in Ginza. Though I just met her we quickly became friends, we even exchanged numbers and decided to meet next day. When we got back to Ginza HQ Hyde and Kokonoi both looked rather annoyed of us being absent for so long but Monica just kissed Kokonoi who looked away blushing. It was kind of sweet how much he changed when Monica was around. He looks so intimidating with a horrible attitude on his own but with Monica he is like a whole different person. I guess that's how love looks like.

"See you tomorrow Yaya!" Monica waves at me before walking out of the office the the white haired money bag.

"You really shouldn't be friends with anyone you meet here..." Hyde speaks up the second were alone. "Kokonoi's one of Bonten's top exec and she is his girlfriend" Bonten.. here is that name again.

"I'm gonna stay away from Bonten, okay? I'm just happy to have a new friend" I sigh, hiding the fact that the more he mentions Bonten the more I want to know what's going on.

"Just be safe, okay?" he sighs and rubs his temples. "You should go home, I am sure Imaushi is missing you"

"Sure..." I reply rather sarcastically which makes Hyde raise a brow. "Nevermind, it's fine"

"Is he not treating you well?" he cocks a brow.

"He does, is just..." I let out a deep sigh and tell him everything and how I been feeling the past few weeks especially ever since that incident which I don't exactly tell in full details.

"It sounds to me you're still in love with those two guys. If you're not happy just tell Wakasa and go after those who you love. Don' let them go" he explains and I hear the hurt tone in his voice.

"I'll see, I just wanna lay down and forget what happened" I sigh as I lean against his desk.

"Do you wanna spend the night here?" he offers as he looks up at me.

"No, I have to take Waka's car home" I shake my head, deep down wanting to stay with him. He brings me comfort and safety just like Yasu did.

"Take the car home then I'll pick you up" he offers again and I give him a small smile.

"Thank you Hyde" I hug him then kiss his cheek to which he frowns, just like Yasu used to which makes me chuckle. "See you soon!"

"Drive safe, numbnut" he says with a small smile and shakes his head as he watches me skip out of his office.

Being with Hyde in the past few years really has became my comfort thing. It's strange how much he reminds me of Yasu but I know it's more likely my mind desperately wanting my brother back so it's projecting the small things onto him so I can pretend my brother is still with me. It's not healthy but Hyde doesn't seem to mind and I can tell he likes my company and he enjoys finally being able to take the mask off that he shows the rest of the world.

When I got back to Waka's to my surprise he was at home. I parked his Bugatti in the garage then walked in through the backdoor that opens to the kitchen from the garage. As I walked in I found Waka in the kitchen leaning against the counter sipping on a glass of whiskey.

"Hey, welcome home pretty girl" he smiles as his lazy purple eyes find me, but instead of the butterfly it just made me feel... nothing.

"Hey, I won't stay long I'm gonna spend the night with Hyde" I force a smile and he just cocks a brow.

"Why? I thought we can spend the night together. Go out to my club, have a few drinks, dance, let me show my pretty kitten off" he smiles as he pulls me to him but I just push him away.

"Enough Wakasa!" I suddenly snap and he gives me a confused look.

"What's going on with you? Did something happen, kitten?" he cocks a brow.

"Tell me, what am I?" I look at him staring straight into his beautiful dark purple orbs.

"What are you talking about?" he cocks a brow.

"Am I just a trophy? Am I just a young pretty thing for you to show off?" I ask and he goes quiet and my heart starts to beat faster. "Answer me Imaushi!"

"Where is all this coming from? I thought you were happy. Haven't I given you everything you asked for or needed? Does it matter what you are to me? I care about you and I want you in my life, you were the best thing that happened to me..."

"I need some time Waka..." I take a step back and shake my head.

"Let me know when you're ready and I drop you off at Hyde's. I only had one drink" he says then presses a kiss to my forehead before walking off into the living room.

I just stand there in the kitchen trying to figure out what the hell is going on with me? Did me seeing the Haitanis messed me up this much? Everything was perfect, even if I had my demons I never let them succumb me so why now? Is Monica right? Should I leave Waka? The thoughts were spinning around in my head and I started to feel like I was drowning until I felt a tight embrace around me.

"Are you okay Angel?" Wakasa asks as he pets my hair while holding me close to him.

"I don't know anymore, the dream really messed with my head" I mumble into his shoulder.

"It was all a dream. I know you miss those idiots and I am sure they're missing you too, but you all moved on. Try and let your thoughts rest" he kisses my temple and offers me a small smile. The way he lied so comfortably and naturally, scared me. Have he lied about other things too?

#wakasa x angel #wakasa x oc #imaushi wakasa #wakasa imaushi #black dragons #the white leopard #tokyo revengers #tr oc #tokyo rev oc

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now-we-say-c0ral · 1 year

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April 11, 2023

Sleep last night wasn't exactly that great. My body tends to not sleep very deeply when it knows that it's going to be the first day of the week that it's going back to work. Same with Eddie. Went to the train station around 5.45am and gave each other a kiss goodbye. He's kind of sweet for that. Arrived in Waterloo just in time for my 6.27am train back to Norbiton and got back home even before 7am. Passed by Little Waitrose to get me my favorite double espresso shot with milk in a can by Starbucks. It's really the best, mind you. It only costs, like, what? 1.5£? It's a steal. Gotta get your caffeine in your system.

Got to work at around 7.35am and there wasn't really much to do. Most cases have been cancelled and only the local Plastic list was running. Relieved the staff there for a while until most of them have had their breaks and helped arrange and clean some stuff in the unit. Went to lunch with Carla and Dani in the canteen. The day at work was very uneventful. Went home at around 5.30pm.

I could see the end of my schedule in Kingston in my work roster and it's kind of giving me mixed feelings. I THINK I won't be planning a big leaving due party for me. I'm shy. I just planned to bring food on my last day and that's it but the boys in the unit are asking if I did want to go on a fishing trip with them along with the others too as my leaving due party. It's kind of cute how they're thinking of planning this in my behalf and even if it won't happen, I guess I'm fine. I'm fine with the thought of them having have thought of me and how to make my last day with them memorable for me. They're literally the cutest.. and also the best.

Went to the gym and got there around 6.40pm-ish. Did legs, a bit of arms (so I could do it again tomorrow), and abs. Forgot to do some push-ups but nevermind, I'll do chest and shoulders tomorrow.

SZA's having her concert here in London by June 17 and 18, I think. Me, Porcia, Kim, and JC are going. I'm gonna make a groupchat and we're all going to be going to the concert. I'm so excited! Can't wait to bawl singing Kill Bill. Cancelled my meetup with John this Sunday. I know and feel that he's not into it as much as we were two weeks ago so why bother, right? But I am meeting up with JC this Sunday. Maybe around Shoreditch, he says. I have so many stories to tell him, my gosh. I think I'll just cry, to be fucking honest. My time here in the UK is anything but easy and to have another Zamboangeno hear my unheard and unspoken experiences, it's going to be so emotional for me.

Also have spoken to someone from Facebook Marketplace about buying a closet... Ed's landlords have okayed me getting one since they won't get me, which is kind of understandable considering Ed has a wardrobe and a chest of drawers. I just have to consult with Eddie if he'd think he'd like the design.

Went to Aldi after going to the gym and bought some essentials for my lunch and snacks at work. Going back to protein shakes in the morning. I have to build muscle. I'm not building any.

Thoughts... Mmm? I was overthinking again... but I didn't let the thoughts get too deep in my skin. I guess this is what I meant about what I wrote yesterday, that I feel more equipped handling difficult situations like this.

Just waiting for a call from Eddie then will cap the night off.

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pearbody-squareheads · 2 years

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16/06/22 (353 words)

39.025 words, 125 pages

It was one week ago (I was gonna say three days- my internal calendar has already gone to fuck itself), my best friend and I were chilling in a park, lying in the grass listening to old jugoslavian rock (under her request, though it was just two songs) when she pops up and says "is it possible to get top's funko pop at the comics store?" I tell her no, I already tried once and they're special, comic stores can't get them. So she checks online. "Hey, it's little less than 40 euros for both." Yeah, they were like 37 in the official website. "Found them! They're affordable. " And I'm thinking, uhm, is she planning to buy me one for my birthday? Because we had been talking about birthday gifts since our birthdays are coming close. Few minutes later I understand that no, she plans to buy them, we both pay our part and each gets one of them. She pills me 20 euros... an unplanned thing, bit of a heavy. I still haven't recovered from my wallet theft. But... nevermind. Then we argue about who gets to have who. It took 30 seconds. I say, "I kinda want tyler." "Oh, you can't always... I wanted him too!" "Who made you know top?" "But-" "Who made you know top?" And then she jokingly sighs and gives up while I laugh.

Speedrun to today.

Welcome aboard little buddy. This is my box of memories, of which the box itself is one. It is the box in which my Vans arrived. It contains: beer caps from events I want to remember, the two bracelets of the school parties I attended, a lace with the metal tongues of the last...20-30 cans I drank (monster and few redbulls), a tag from the Vans shoes, and a negative covid test. Now Funko Tyler takes up half of the space... and it fits perfectly! It's nice. I sure could live without it, I'd have 20 euros more in my almost dried wallet. But...OK... it's cool. Another piece for my tiny collection.

I hope I'll get to fill the box with more beer caps, bracelets and maybe. Photos. More memories.

And Lighty (I decided this will be her name) did answer me, this morning, after I sent her a sticker. Told me she actually stayed away from her phone, so ok, it's fine. Told me a not really good news... then to text her again in the evening to remind her to tell me the definitive decision. I did. She never read it. I'll wait tomorrow morning and repeat from the start... I don't want to spend another Pride like last time. Which, hey, it was cool! But the first 20 minutes were awful and I ended up being adopted by a pack of strangers... out of mercy, probably.

And my arm still hurts weirdly. The bruise is fading but it's still horrible to see.

#ruben one #funko tyler

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lettuce-gremlin · 3 years

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Oh god I gotta put together my little gay outfit for a cookout tonight

#two friends have graduated and one is moving #so we're having a final cookout before she goes #and most of the folks there are 1. lgbt and 2. vaccinated #so like... i actually gotta dress to impress y'know?#nevermind that I'm gonna see her again in like two weeks #because I'm also going to the same place #that's not important

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muite · 3 years

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY PLATANITO !

» angst with kokonoi hajime ; here's my granito de arroz in platanito's birthday event ♡

"you won't be coming tonight?

"I'm sorry baby, I've been really busy and that's actually a really good thing for the company"

"oh nevermind, I was thinking we could go out and have a nice dinner" smiling at him through the phone "I thought you could use it"

"hm, I don't think we can y/n"

"why not?"

"I'm gonna be busy tomorrow too"

"oh.."

"but we can go out the day after tomorrow baby, don't be sad ok?"

"yeah, don't worry about it"

"ok, I'm gonna go now, take care, don't sleep with your feet outside the sheets"

laughing softly at this demanding tone you answered "take care haji"

hearing the beep from the device pressed against your ear you sighed this is the third time he cancels our plans, not wanting to be suspicious of him you started preparing dinner

he's not like that.. he's not

how many nights had passed since he touched you or slept with you in the same bed?

he must be really busy and tired

but how did come inui was able to take breaks and keep his relationships with everyone normal and without any problems?, the sudden thought of inui rememberd you of a conversation with him a little while ago when he asked when the two of you would get married and have little babies running around

I ask myself the same

thinking that he must be really tired and that he probably will dismiss eating properly you decided on making him his favorite, you can bring it to him later to work, if he didn't have time to see you because of it you would go see him instead

an hour had already passed and you were ready, dressed nicely and simple, carrying the food in tupperware containers, utensils and two drinks in the biggest lunch bag you could find

excitement bubbled up in your chest, you hadn't seen him in over a week and missing him so much was making you go crazy

will he shout my name in surprise?

the thought making you giddy, laughing softly at your silly ideas you open the door of his apartment, sliding softly through it, it already late, the only source of light coming from a room at the back

walking towards it your mouth parted excited to say something like "delivery!" or anything that would make him laugh for sure

but instead you're met with his pleading voice

"please, I'm not asking for much"

"don't you have a girl at home koko?"

"she doesn't mean anything!"

it didn't take you long to understand that you were that supposedly 'girl at home' and that koko had just admitted how you didn't mean anything

you didn't want to, but with all the quietness you could get you poked your head out, trying to take a look at what was happening there

first: you saw your boyfriend's body and another one of the same stature Infront of him, who you guessed was Inui for the light color of his hair

moving your eyes up to catch a glimpse of koko's face your eyes made contact with Inui, said individual already looking at you

ducking your head you hoped he didn't tell koko, his earlier proclamation of how you were nothing still not settling well in you, and wanting to keep listening at what he had to say hoping that it was just a misunderstanding

I'm in denial aren't I?

"she doesn't mean anything koko?"

"you know she doesn't Inupi! just... please" a heaved breath coming from koko resonated in the room "please... I just want to see akane again"

the sound of your heart breaking together with every thought in your mind was all you could hear

"that's really low"

"I stopped caring about that a long ago" koko shuts his eyes closed "i'm getting desperate"

"then why don't you tell me what y/n means to you?"

your eyes widened at Inupi's request, he knew you were listening, did he want to break you even more?

"she's just warming my bed while I get akane back" he felt like he's going to regret this, but if the outcome of this mess let him get back with akane then it would be worth it "I really liked her at first, she was sweet and the perfect idea of a girlfriend but I was just fooling myself"

"how so?"

"I liked to think that the news would reach akane and she'll try to get back at me"

for a moment everything was silent, your poor little heart had been stepped on, pissed on and just thrown to the side like it was nothing, you felt numb all over, thinking to yourself if a human was capable of surviving a heartbreaking pain like this

"well, you have your answer y/n"

"ha?"

"you can come out now"

you wanted to go and scream, kick koko, slap him, but you couldn't, the life was slowly eated away from your eyes, soulless orbs took place where your had shining lovesick eyes before all changed with the sudden force of hatred

he said so himself, you were just a bed warmer while he was your first in everything, if koko didn't see any value in you how would you see it for yourself? tossed aside like trash you felt like it too, you didn't want to hate him but the state your mind was currently in wouldn't allow yourself to keep on loving him

removing your stupid big lunch bag and the contents inside you left as quickly as your feet could carry you, you didn't want any of them to look at how pathetic you had become in just a few minutes

and just as koko came outside of the room to see who was outside the room you had walked out the door

I didn't want to love you, you taught me how hate you

and now as you walked out of his life you wondered if you would be capable of loving someone again, you wondered where are the children you never had with him

maybe in saturn

#happybdayplatanito #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers x reader fluff #tokyorev x reader #tokyo revengers fluff #kokonoi hajime x reader angst #kokonoi hajime x reader #kokonoi hajime x reader fluff #kokonoi x you #kokonoi tokyo revengers #tokrev x reader #tokrev x reader smut #tokyo revengers mikey #mikey tokyo revengers #mikey x reader smut

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jojothaho · 3 years

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Sister Sister. Hanma + Kawata Twins

Word count: 813

Request: Hanma dating/hooking up with the Kawata twins older sister.

Warnings: Mild cursing

♡ Your brothers have never been fond of Hanma; The less they interacted with him, the better. If it were up to them, they wouldn't even attend the same school as him. He was such a snarky bastard, popping in and out of their homeroom, just to screw with them.

♡ So you bet they were anything but pleased when they saw him hanging around you, their precious older sister. When Souya first saw the two of you together, you were on the field. Hanma had his arm draped over your shoulder, and it took everything in Souya, and Nahoya holding him back, to not go over there and whoop his ass.

♡ The twins would confront you about it later, at home, where they wouldn't have to worry about seeing that snake's face. Or so they thought.

"Out of all the guys you could've chosen, why him?"

"You say that as if there's something wrong with him?"

"There IS something wrong with him."

"Look, the little brother smothering isn't something I want to hear right now."

"Tch."

♡ Nahoya knew you weren't having it, so he resigned, only warning you.

"Have your fun, but if he ever crosses the threshold of this house, I'll kill him <3."

♡ You never were the type to listen to your brothers.

♡ The second the twins saw Hanma rummaging through their fridge, half-naked at 4 am, they jumped him, with a bat. Where did they even get that wth???

"What the fuck are you doing in our house?"

Hanma laughed. "I think you already know why."

♡ Nahoya was not in any mood for Hanma's bullshit.

"I'm gonna ask one more time, what the fuck are you doing in our house?"

"Well, since you want me to tell you sooo badly, I just boned your sister."

♡ Hanma seriously underestimated how crazy your brothers were.

♡ Souya's fist collided with the side of Hanma's face, sending him to the ground, while Nahoya manifested a bat into his palm. Seriously, where did he get that from???

"Do you wanna die fast or slow <3?"

♡ Nahoya asked, his grin never leaving his face.

♡ Hanma recovered quickly though, "god, you're fucking crazy."

♡ If you had come out any later, Hanma's brain matter would've painted the walls of your kitchen.

"What the hell is going on?!"

♡ During the ruckus, the boys didn't hear you come out of your room.

"Nothing Y/n chan <3."

♡ Nahoya replied, not even trying to hide the mystery bat, which was dangerously close to Hanma's head. You huffed and snatched the bat from your brother's hand. How does he even have this????

"I don't know what the two of you were planning to do with this, but I'm pretty sure it was illegal."

♡ Hanma took that as his cue to rise from the ground, smirking the whole way.

"Thanks for the save babe."

"Who the fuck are you calling babe?"

♡ Sigh. You should've known this was going to happen, smh.

You pinched the bridge of your nose,

"Hanma, go to my room and stay there."

♡ After His departure from the potential crime scene, the worst of you came out.

"WHAT THE FUCK YOU TWO??"

"Didn't I tell you not to bring him here?"

♡ Souya didn't say anything, but you could tell he agreed implicitly.

"And where did I ever say that I would listen to you?"

"He probably doesn't even like you! He's just using you to get to us!"

♡ A loud slap echoed through the small kitchen of your home.

"You aren't special Nahoya, do you honestly think he would do all of this, just to get at you?"

♡ Nahoya was silent, clearly surprised you hit him, after all, you never had before. You sighed before speaking again in a less harsh tone.

"Listen, I understand you don't want to see me hurt, but I'm not a little girl. I'm smart enough to tell when I'm being used, and I don't need you two sheltering me."

"I don't care if you don't like Hanma, but I do, and you two need to respect that."

♡ After you finished your big sis rant, the three of you sat in silence, the tension higher than the arch in Kisaki's eyebrows. After few minutes, Nahoya left, Souya trailing behind him, totally shoulder checking you on his way out.

"Petty."

♡ About a week later, on one of their snack runs, the twins saw Hanma with a girl. And she was clearly trying to get touchy with him. Of course, they stalked him, they needed proof to snitch on him later. But to their surprise, Hanma was completely unresponsive to her tactics, and he even shoved her away at one point.

"Maybe he's not that bad?"

"..."

"Nevermind I still hate him."

♡ So, the twins learned how to deal with Hanma, and his late-night fridge-scavenging. But that doesn't mean they liked it.

"Get your ass out of my fridge you rat!"

#souya #souya kawata #nahoya #nahoya kawata #shuji #shuji hanma #shuji x reader #shuji hanma x reader #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader

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messedupfan · 3 years

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Should've Told You (Leigh Shaw x Reader) Chapter 6

Summary: Y/n and Leigh talk some more.

A/N: Let me know what you think. Not really sure how I feel about it.

Taglist Request | Masterlist | All Chapters

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She made you tie her shoes.

Almost every day at school or when you hung out together, Leigh made you tie her shoes.

Well, she technically didn't make you but she would ask only you. Sometimes she didn't do it verbally, she'd jab you with her elbow and stick her foot out to show the untied laces. Other times she would make a lot of eye contact and drop her gaze to the ground until you noticed. You would grumble in annoyance but you would still get down on one knee, prop her foot on the other, and tie her shoe without protest. To show her gratitude she would give you a hug and then you secretly anticipated the next time she needed her shoes to be tied. There were moments you initiated the action by asking if she needed them tied and she would blush with a sheepish yes. That meant she held onto you with a side hug until you had to go separate ways. Of course, that was before Jade took the majority of your attention.

Then one day, around the beginning of junior year, you started to notice that she wouldn't ask anymore. Her shoes would be untied through the day and she didn’t make you fix them. You would see the loose laces in the morning, during lunch, and in the afternoon just before everyone had to get on their buses. But because of an argument with your girlfriend, you didn’t offer right away.

You found it odd that they would be left untied because it's not like she wasn’t capable of tying her own shoes. You knew that she never liked to, but to leave them be and not ask anyone else was weird. So after another week of noticing this, at the end of the day while you were gathered with your friends, you noticed Leigh's untied laces once again. This time, you drop on one knee in front of her and pat the other one. "What are you doing?" She asks with a startled tone.

"Leigh, it's been several weeks and I've seen you tripping in the halls. Let me tie your shoes," you tell her with a smile and pat the standing knee again. She rolls her eyes but casts a grateful look towards you and you notice her giving your girlfriend a nervous one. "Can I come over today?" You grab her attention back to you and then switch her feet.

"Oh um… yeah. That should be fine. My mom said she wants to make tacos tonight, so it's a good day to hangout."

You feel a nudge on your shoulder and look up at your slightly annoyed girlfriend. "Babe, I thought you might want to hangout with me tonight… You know my parents are out of town this weekend and I hate to be lonely," she pouts and bats her eyes in a way that is supposed to be sensual and alluring but to you it only comes off as desperate. Jade has been trying to get you into bed for the past five months because she figured after being with someone for six months it was time to cross another threshold of the relationship. But you weren't ready to have sex. You didn't know if it was her, or timing, or some old religious teaching that you don't even believe anymore but you didn't want to have sex.

"Well, you can come—" Leigh is cut off by Jades glare and now you know that there is definitely something going on between the two of them. "Nevermind, Y/n, I think that you should go hang out with your girlfriend instead. Thank you for tying my shoes." Leigh backs away when you’re done and leaves to go on her bus.

You sigh and shake your head at your girlfriend before you turn and catch up with Leigh. She tries to ask what you are doing but you stop her. "You said what you think now I'm gonna say what I think. Okay? Can I do that?"

"Sure," she mumbles and plays with the straps of her bookbag.

"I think that I haven't really spent time with my favorite person in a while and I don't feel like being pressured into having sex for the millionth time when I'm not ready." Leigh scrunches her nose and complains about not wanting to know that much information about your relationship. You laugh and agree that maybe it was a little much to reveal but it was getting to the point where you needed to talk to someone about it. There was a whole lot more but no one needed to carry that around so you carried it alone. "Okay, I won't tell you any more about my troubles but if we break up just know it's your fault." You tease but then all expression drops from Leigh's face.

"Why would it be my fault? You didn't even like her until I said something. I practically set the both of you up!" She says with panic in her tone.

"Shh… her other super spy friends are everywhere. She'll hear you, and have my ass later for it," you whisper semi-jokingly. It was scary the amount of times Jade found out about some private conversation you had about her. She'd either get really mad or very clingy depending on what she found out. "Also that is so not true. I was attracted to her way before you told me she had a crush."

Leigh snaps her eyes towards you. "Really?" You nod. "Oh. I just thought… Nevermind. I don't know what I thought." There was that weird look again and you still haven't deciphered what it meant. But as usual, you shrug it off.

"Can I pwease come over? I really want to hangout with you. I miss you," you poke her cheek with a pout and a childish voice.

"Fine but no sleeping over. Your girlfriend already hates me enough," her eyes widened at what she had said.

Your brows furrowed in confusion, "What?"

"Nothing, let's just… talk when we're not at risk of being heard by her coven or whatever the fuck they're calling themselves these days," you laugh at her description of Jade’s band members slash other friends. They were always trying out some dark name to give themselves to seem deep and mysterious. Leigh grasps your bicep and rushes you over to her bus.

"Oh I stopped paying attention to all that a while ago. I just know that they all scare me. I've taken to calling them Widows but only in my head because I know that no one will get the reference," you find a seat towards the back to sit down.

"You're right because I have no idea why you would call them Widows."

"It's a comic book thing," you shrug.

Leigh snorts and shakes her head. "Nerd," she mocks.

It took the entire ride over to Leigh’s house to make you realize just how long it’s been since the two of you hung out. You had been busy with training for your new job and she was getting more shifts at her mothers dance studio. She wasn’t teaching yet but she was being given more responsibilities which kept her time occupied most afternoons. The two of you chatted and caught up with each other but it was mostly small talk. Like she was deliberately holding back from you. Normally, Leigh was right next to you so there was no chance of being overheard while you mocked the other kids on the bus. This time she used her backpack to make space between the two of you and kept the conversation formal.

She eased up when you guys arrived at her house and then things fell into a normal pace again as the two of you lounged on the couch in the basement, watching The Amityville Horror. Since watching Saw, she has changed her opinion of horror movies considerably but only if you were around as she was still frightened by them. Leigh admitted to you once that she can't watch them without you, that she tried with Jules and her mom on a few occasions but ended up running off to her room. That made you smile.

You couldn't help but laugh at her when she jumped; attaching herself to your side, burying her face into her hands. "We can turn this off if it's too much for you," you watched her with a grin on your face.

"Shut up! It's not even scary," she complained as she pushed herself away from you. You instantly missed her warmth but there was nothing you could do about it.

"Lollipop, you're missing half the movie!" You retorted with a laugh.

"Don't call me that," she mutters as she walks from the couch to the recliner to add space and you could feel the distance build between you again. “Why don’t you have a special nickname for Jade?” She asks, keeping her gaze on the screen even though you are certain she can feel your eyes on her.

“One hasn’t manifested naturally. Not a cute one at least, there are plenty of things I choose not to call her,” you respond lightly but Leigh doesn’t laugh.

You sigh and pause the movie. Leigh frowns and furrows her eyebrows as she turns to you, “I told you the movie isn’t scary. I can handle it!”

“What happened between you and Jade?” You ask.

“Nothing. Put the movie back on,” she crosses her arms and slouches into her seat. You don’t budge and ask her again, telling her that she doesn’t need to lie, that she can tell you anything. “I don’t know what you’re getting at. Nothing happened, nothing is wrong. Everything is fine,” she stands up and walks over to you to grab the remote from you but you hold it out of her reach. “Stop being annoying, there is nothing to talk about.”

“Come on, Leigh. I notice everything, something happened and I want to help. Please, just tell me what it is,” you plead with her and she locks her jaw, annoyed that you won’t drop the subject.

Leigh walks back over to the recliner and plays with her thumbs as she considers telling you what happened or kicking you out and making sure you never bring it up again. “We hung out just the two of us right before school started and she told me that I needed to set better boundaries between us. That it was wrong for you and I to be so close when she was the one dating you. Said that I was somehow getting in the way. Jade was just being annoying and jealous. You know how she is. But Jade was clear that as long as the two of you were together, you and I couldn’t be as close as we used to be. So she said either I pull away from you a little or cut you out completely otherwise she would take matters into her own hands.”

You frown and run your fingers through your hair. The sad thing was this wasn't unbelievable. It sounds exactly like Jade because she gave you the same choice, “Why would you agree to that?” you ask, hurt that she had been following along. She invited you over less and when she did it was always a group thing. She stopped asking you to tie her shoes. Leigh barely hugged you anymore. Phone calls barely lasted an hour any more. And she always had an excuse to avoid plans you made unless you mentioned another name being involved.

“Because she makes you happy and you make her happy. That’s important to me.”

“Oh, and our friendship isn’t?”

“That’s not… What? Of course our friendship is important to me! But your happiness means more,” she argued.

“Well obviously you haven’t been paying attention because I’m miserable,” you let slip. Leigh goes quiet, possibly wrapped up in her own thoughts. You curse to yourself because before this moment you hadn’t admitted to yourself how you were feeling in the relationship. No one knew there were problems with you and Jade. It all appeared to be happy and healthy, your friends often commented on how nauseatingly adorable they found you two. But alone it was far from it. She was controlling and manipulative and possessive. She was close to driving you insane with her jealousy and her rules. Most of the time you spent together would start off good. You would cuddle or make out, joke around or just chat. Then one wrong thing happened and that led to arguing and absurd accusations, which always ended with one of you walking out on the other. Recently she was fixated on the idea that you had feelings other than friendship for Leigh. You, of course, denied every claim she made. Making it clear that you only wanted her. Which she bought until she saw you around Leigh. Then the manipulation would start and you hated that the most. That really made you want to call it quits and find a way to get her out of your life for good.

Despite the growing pile of negative aspects of your relationship, there were some really good times. Like when she would make you laugh harder than anyone, or was supportive of all of your crazy ideas, or when she helped you prepare for a role, or when she wrote you a song, or the way she clung to you after she had a really bad day. Like she needed you and only you. It made you feel good in the moment but would later twist your stomach in knots in the most uncomfortable way possible. Thinking about what would happen if you broke up with her. Your mom liked her a lot and she got along well with your brothers. She was the second person you told about your older brother’s remission. Leigh was of course the first, but your brother wanted Jade to know. He really got along with her and that was important to you because for a moment there, you didn't think he was ever going to be around to meet anyone you dated. Both of your brothers were already calling Jade their sister-in-law. Which sounded cute at first but now it made you feel like you were suffocating.

Jade did make you happy sometimes. Those times were just becoming less and less. What made matters worse was not only did you feel that you couldn’t leave, you didn’t want to. Things were so complicated and ending it amicably was a pipe dream. You were wrong before, no relationship was flexible. Especially not when both parties were embedded in a very close knit group of friends. Breaking up with Jade meant that people were going to have to choose sides and you didn’t want to ask that of anyone but you knew that she would. You felt that you had to stick it out until she was done with you and hope that Jade didn’t make it into a big thing. Except you knew there wasn’t a way to end this relationship and remain friends after. You saw every ugly side she had and it scared you. But now that she brought Leigh into this, you weren’t as afraid of her. You would do anything to protect Leigh.

“I didn’t realize… You guys seem so… What’s going on? You can tell me, Y/n. I won’t say anything to anyone. I promise,” Leigh makes her way back over to you and takes your hand in hers to give you support and the strength you suddenly felt you were lacking.

It takes you a second to gather your thoughts but you easily confess to Leigh every negative part about your relationship; you end it by telling her how much you want out of the relationship but express why you can't leave. She gives you a hug and the two of you don't let go until her mom calls out your names to notify you guys about dinner being ready. "I wish…" you let the words fade away, not having the courage to properly end the sentence with “I was with you.” Instead, when she's looking at you in the eyes patiently waiting for you to finish you say, "I wish things were easier with Jade." She looks disappointed but you don't question why and pull away.

Dinner is light and fun, Jules ended up staying home instead of going out like she usually does on a Friday night. It was a full family dinner and you felt right at home being able to keep up with the dinner conversation and occasional quips. As it got late you became very aware of the time but you didn't want to leave. Leigh didn't want you to go either, despite what she had said earlier. So you spend the night after lying to Jade over the phone that you went home. You sleep on an air mattress instead of sharing the pull out couch like normal. Leigh moves to the edge of the bed and asks you to hold her hand because the horror movies are making it hard to fall asleep. You laugh but provide her that comfort. And you don’t let go until you wake up.

Saturday morning you help make breakfast, walk home, change and bike to work. After your shift, you go straight to Jade's house and give her exactly what she wanted. You made her happy and she told you that she loved you. That made you teary eyed, not from happiness like she assumed but you said it back with a heavy heart. You didn’t want an argument and when she wanted to go again, you did without question. Allowing to lose yourself in the moment instead of in your guilty conscience.

Monday morning Leigh resumed asking you to tie her shoes and you continued to receive the hugs that made your day. Jade quit trying to control your friendship with Leigh because she believed that you had given her every part of you and you never corrected her. Shortly after Jade boasted about the sex between the two of you, Leigh got herself a boyfriend and it killed you to see her with him. There was nothing you could do but concentrate on work, school, and Jade.

Then Leigh started working with you and it made it all the harder to focus on anything that wasn't her. But you carried on denying your feelings and just enjoyed making her laugh every chance you got. On the surface nothing changed between the two of you, the friendship remained intact and strong. But there were weird moments when you and Leigh would be hanging out by yourselves that you would remember that she had a boyfriend and you had Jade. She would be reminded as well. Things would go quiet for a bit and distance would settle between the two of you. But you always found a way to lose the tension and forget. Forgetting was easy, except when there were group gatherings and you were forced to be around each other and the significant others. Anytime you felt jealousy squeezing your heart when you saw them all cuddly and kissy and happy, you tried to pay more attention to your girlfriend. Despite your efforts, your eyes barely left Leighs. What made it worse was she would be staring back at you. Jade was oblivious to the little game you thought you might've been playing. You didn't want to read into her actions.

However, the jealousy didn’t go unnoticed by Leigh’s boyfriend.

At a party to celebrate the end of the school year that some kid in your class was throwing, he approached you about backing off of his girlfriend. Making insane accusations that you couldn’t technically deny but for the most part they weren't true. You simply told him that he had no clue what he was talking about. Then he got in your face, that’s what made things take a turn for the worst. Because Jade had made you smoke a full joint with some of her friends before they performed for everyone and Jules got you to share a few strong drinks with her and her friends, his outburst made you lose control. You didn’t remember much the next day, just that your hands hurt and you were completely embarrassed and ashamed of yourself. You went to your mom and asked if you could spend the summer with your dad who was ecstatic to host you during the vacation and paid for the plane ticket to leave that week. The only calls you answered that week were Jades and she was the only one to know where you were going to be for the summer. She asked for a break and you were relieved to give her one.

When you arrived in your hometown, you listened to Leigh’s variety of voicemails. She was upset about the fight, then she wanted to make sure you were okay, then she was upset to find out that you left, then she wished you a good summer. It wasn’t until a few weeks before your return that you had the guts to call her back. She was surprisingly happy to finally hear from you. She brushed you off when you tried to apologize and said it was probably for the best. Leigh tells you about the break up she went through, the girl she was secretly seeing, the babysitting she was doing for Lisa and Jerry and all of the other things she had done while you were gone. You hated that you missed out on a summer with your friends because of your stupidity.

When you returned, you had a new perspective on your life and you wanted to be a better person. You even considered finding Leigh and owning up to your feelings because hiding them appeared to be the root of your problems. All you could do was hope that it wouldn’t scare her away and maybe she even returned them. Then you saw Leigh unmeasurably happy with her girlfriend and you went back into old habits and straight to pursuing Jade. She wasn’t quick to take you back simply because she liked having you chase her around. But eventually she relented and it was the biggest mistake for both of you.

At the end of the day, Leigh was happy, Jade seemed happy, and although you were back to being miserable, that was all that mattered to you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning you wake up with a searing headache and a warm body wrapped around you. For a second you fear that you might’ve had some random hook up that could potentially be leaked to the media and annoy you for the next months but luckily it was just Leigh. You feel your whole body relax at the realization and then you take in your surroundings. The two of you weren't in her bed, you were in the living room. Questions build as the details of the previous night slowly start to clear them up in your mind and guilt eats at you.

You can't believe that you told her about Matt's message. How you kept the true nature of your feelings for her all of these years is a mystery because you've failed again and again at keeping any other secret from her. Leigh snuggles into you more in her sleep only making you feel worse about the situation. Luckily, the movement caused the cool metal of the pendant on your necklace to land on her face and it was enough to wake her up. She never was a heavy sleeper.

"What is this?" She asks with closed eyes as she reaches for the pendant with her hand. "Am I feeling this right? Is this a cross?" She shifts in the position, hovering over you, to observe the newest piece of jewelry.

"It's my brother," you sigh.

"Okay, I must still be dreaming. What is this?" She holds the cross up so you can see it too.

"It's some of my brother's ashes," you explain better.

"That's not at all creepy," she mutters looking at the object more. You laugh a little at her words, still in pain from the headache. "Why'd you choose a cross? Literally no one in your family is religious."

"Not true, everyone in my extended family is religious. My mom was just the black sheep and then made sure her kids were too," you joke.

"Okay, that still doesn't explain the cross."

"I didn't pick it," you yawn. "My dad sent it to me. He's religious," you say pointedly.

"Huh," Leigh continues to play with the piece of jewelry which makes you smile. "How long have you had this thing? And why am I only now noticing it?"

You frown as you think back how much time has passed since you received it. "I don't know, not long. It wasn’t something I wanted to show off and have to explain so I usually keep it under my shirt and I take it off before bed. I was way too tired to do that last night though," you finish sheepishly.

"Right," Leigh says, still playing with the necklace. "I'm so sorry," her lower lip begins to tremble and it's a telltale sign that she is about to start crying. You adjust your position to sit up and hold her face in your hands.

"Hey, hey, no tears. It's okay, I'm okay. I deserved it, I was the one who showed up here wasted out of my mind. It's not your fault, Lollipop," you comfort her. "I believe I already forgave you. I'll buy a chisel and find a stone if I have to." She smiles through her tears and throws her arms around your neck in a tight hug. You return the gesture while stroking her back until she's ready to pull away.

"You're too good to me, you know that?" I feel like I'm not good enough, you reply in your head.

"Oh I know, but you've stuck with me this long. I think you've earned it." Leigh nudges your shoulder and calls you a jerk. "Ow hey! Do I need to look up a number for domestic abuse?"

"Whatever you big baby," she giggles, making the butterflies in your stomach flutter. Then she makes your heart race when out of nowhere she leans in and kisses your cheek for much longer than she ever has before.

"What was that for?" You ask once you've recovered from the shock.

"To make you feel better," she shrugs.

“Are you only healing the pain you caused or can you help with my headache too?”

“Hmm, I think I can make an exception,” Leigh places three chaste kisses on your head. One on each temple and one in the middle of your forehead. “Better?”

You wear a goofy grin and nod your head even though it didn’t cure the pain. "Much better,” you stare at her a little longer until you get an idea. “Give me the hand," you requested gently. She is confused, "The hand you hit me with," you elaborate. Then she pretends not to know which hand it was so she demonstrates every slap that was possible making you laugh before she gives you the hand that she hit you with. "Did it sting after? I vaguely remember my face stinging after."

Leigh shrugs, "I didn't think about it much because as soon as I realized what I did I went searching for you. Why?" She watches you examine the palm of her hand with curiosity.

"No reason," you say before you place an abundance of kisses on her hand and after you give it a light massage. "There! I kissed away all of it’s sins," you declare. “So now, the slap never happened.” Leigh shakes her head at you. "What?" You ask innocently.

"How is it that I hurt you and you still take care of me?"

"Because I love you," you answer simply. Leigh puts on a brave face because she thinks you mean it as a platonic kind of love. At this moment you wanted to kiss her to correct her but instead you consider letting Matt do that for you. "Are we okay?" You ask unsure if she was still upset about not letting her listen to Matt's last words.

Leigh pulls her hand away from yours and fiddles with her fingers. "I want us to be… I'm just confused. Why would you keep something like that from me? You never keep secrets from me."

You sigh, "It's complicated, he… Matt says that he didn't want you to even know about it. I figured since it was the last thing he asked of me then I have to do it. Besides, it's not an easy thing to listen to. It could set you back, Leigh. I don't want to see you hurting."

"Shouldn't that be my choice?"

You couldn't help but agree. It should be her choice. If she chooses to put herself through that pain, who are you to stop her? But it should be your choice too because the message exposes the biggest secret of your entire life. There was no way you were ready to have that out in the open yet. If ever. Not when there is a chance you could be repeating history and completely obliterate the relationship between you and Leigh. "You're right, it should be. But Matt explicitly says not to let you hear that message."

"Didn't he also say not to let me know about it? You already broke that promise. What's the harm in breaking one more?"

A lot of harm, you think to yourself. "Can I please think about it a little longer?"

"What is there to think about? He was my husband," Leigh stands up from the couch and you know that the moment is over for good. "Please, Y/n. Just let me listen to it," she pleads with you. But you don't budge and your headache is only worsening.

"I should go," you say, climbing off of the couch.

"Really? You're just going to walk out on me?" She raises her voice. Thankfully, her mom and sister were long gone by now.

"What would you rather I do? I don't want to fight with you but I can't just do what you're asking of me right now. You do realize what you’re asking me to do, right? I don't have many things that are important to me, Leigh. But keeping my promises is a pretty damn big one. All I need is a little time to be okay with choosing to break this one. Yes, I broke one last night while I was drunk. There's no excuse for that, but I can’t knowingly break another one. Not for you, not for anyone. You know this, Leigh.” You shake your head and rub your irritated temples. “Thank you for taking care of me last night but I think it’s best for both of us that I leave. I’ll call you when I’ve made up my mind,” you make sure you have your keys and cell in your pockets before walking towards the front door.

“Fine, just run away like you always do! Never one to stay when it’s time to actually step up, huh? Always playing the saint until someone catches on to your mistakes. How long are you going to disappear this time? A month? A year? My next wedding? Hell, when I become a widow again?” Leigh follows behind. You grip the door knob and take slow breaths to consider your options with a clear mind. Don’t say something stupid, she’s just upset, you remind yourself. There is nothing you can say that won’t upset her more and you’re not ready for her to know yet. So you open the door and with one last attempt, she tries to stop you. “Please, don’t go. I can’t promise that I’ll be so forgiving this time,” because you trust that she will be, you continue walking. “This will ruin our friendship!”

That makes you pause. You want to believe that she isn’t aware of what she is doing, that it was the new, irrational, and desperate grief side of her trying to manipulate you. Not the Leigh you’ve known for half your life. Not the one who helped you get out of several toxic and manipulative relationships. This wasn’t a person you recognized anymore. She wasn't your Leigh right now, but if you were going to help her find her way back you needed to know she would let you back in. Everything in you wants to walk away but she already made the mistake of saying something she can’t take back later. So you offer her a chance to take it back now and desperately hope she understands. “If I stay, I don’t know how I will be able to forgive you. So really think about what you say next, Leigh.” You keep your back facing her as your words are tense and short. The two of you are left at a standstill. She is being stubborn and so are you, the only good thing being that you guys aren’t saying a word. Neither is aware of how much time passes with both of you standing on her front porch. But it feels like forever. “Did you mean it?” You ask.

“No.”

“Can I leave?”

“Please don’t.”

You sigh, “I have to. I can’t think straight around you right now.”

Leigh approaches you and takes your hand in hers and gives it a light squeeze, relief fills you. “Okay, but please, don’t run away this time. Please come back.”

You squeeze back, “I will. I promise.”

Chapter 7

Taglist: @madamevirgo @imskyefallen-blog @diianagrimes54 @trikruismybitch @elenaguarnieri @mionemymind @wwheresmymindd @cristin-rjd @simplethoughts07 @lezzzbehonesthere @awkwardmandalorian @dizzy4lizzie @royalityofmultifandom @chillin-like-a-villain @ilovemiddleagedwoman

#leigh shaw x y/n #leigh shaw imagine #sorry for your loss imagine #sorry for your loss #leigh shaw #leigh shaw x reader #leigh shaw x you #fanfiction

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lovelyminnieee · 3 years

Text

Without you- J.J.H

Pairing: Jaehyun x reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Car accident mentions, mentions of death, father!Jaehyun, Coma, mentions of losing a loved one

Summary: Jaehyun doesn't want to deal with life anymore. Without you there to hug him, or tell him it was okay to cry, he didn't want to even come home, unless it was for his daughter. He missed you, so much he could go crazy. Maybe you will never come back, he hasn't lost hope yet. Will you be able to comeback to him and your daughter's lives again?

A/n: this is my first fic on my account, feedbacks would be deeply appreciated. Uh, I am a little nervous to post it, but please do give me feedbacks. And the paragraphs written in italics are memories

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It's been 3 years. Three years without you. There wasn't one day where he didn't think of you. Your daughter and the way she reminds him of you. He's tired of it, tired of life. Without you there to comfort him, tell him it's okay to cry, he's tired.

"Eun ha, we have to get to school!" Jaehyun shouts from one end of the apartment, packing her lunch. "Coming daddy!" His daughter waddles over to him, struggling to put her shoes on. "Let me do it," Jaehyun said as he picked her up and put her on the table. He smiles as he puts her shoes on quickly, placing her down after. "Let's go, okay baby?" Jaehyun holds her little hand, her bag in his other hand.

Jaehyun opened the door to the apartment and sighed. An empty home was not really welcoming. You weren't there to hug him, tell him that you love him. His habits haven't changed, he sat down on the couch and pulled out his phone.

"I miss you so fucking much..."

He texted your number. He missed you so much, he was going crazy. He closed his eyes, trying to hold tears bay. He sent you a picture of Eun ha in her dress up outfit. Like a princess.

"Look at Eun ha, she looks so pretty. Just like you baby"

His fingers type, the memories flooding in. He took you for granted while you were there, and that is the thing he regrets the most in life.

"I understand, but you can't just ignore me like that, Jae," you said, angry. He was ignoring you for the past few days, and you had no idea why. He said it was because of work, but he wasn't there at work during work hours. "No Jae, you're not working, you're somewhere else during work hours," you said, your eyes staring at him. Jaehyun paused for a minute, speechless. He was preparing something special for you, and that was the reason. "I- I was-" Jaehyun sighed. You were getting on his nerves. "Y/n, just leave me alone. You don't understand," he said and walked away, frustrated at your behaviour. You didn't know why you got angry so quickly, you were usually so calm and collected during arguments. "So now you want me to leave you alone?" You scoffed. Jaehyun turned around and stared at you. "Isn't that what I just said?" He stares back at you. "So it's completely okay for you to go out during work hours? And ignore me when you come home? What the fuck, Jae?" You raised your voice a little. "Can you not right now? I'm frustrated, Y/n." Jaehyun tried to keep his cool. "Jae, I've been dealing with so many things, do you think you're the only one who deals with stress?" You ask him, tears swelling in your eyes. Jaehyun closed his eyes, trying to stay collected. Maybe you had a reason to be mad this quick. "You might as well be cheating on me, or lying to me. And what not-"

"WHY ARE YOU BEING LIKE THIS Y/N?-"

"BECAUSE I WANTED TO TELL YOU I WAS PREGNANT, JAE!"

Jaehyun went silent. His heart pounded in his chest at the news. Well, that certainly wasn't a good way to release the news. She was pregnant? He thought.

"You're what?"

"You know what, nevermind," you walked away, wiping your tears. Jaehyun ran up to you and hugged you from behind. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Jaehyun whispered, kissing your neck softly. "I'm hurt, Jae." You whispered, your voice cracking. "I'm so sorry," he said, his hands softly resting over your tummy. Jaehyun's face ceased into a smile, continuing to press his lips against your neck. "I'm going to be a father," Jaehyun's eyes teared up as he twirled you around and kissed you softly. Everything felt unreal at that moment. He was going to be a dad. His heart swelled in happiness, pulling your waist closer to him.

"I'm so sorry about everything. I love you so much"

He pressed the send button, his eyes tearing up.

"Please come back to me, to Eun ha"

Tears ran down his cheeks and his world darkened again. Three years of torture. Three years without you. He doesn't know how he's going to manage. He shifted on the couch, staring mindlessly at the ceiling. "I miss you so much, Y/N." He whispered, holding his tears in. He had to visit you at the hospital soon, so he put his emotions aside for a moment and got up. He walked to his room and changed in a few minutes, grabbing his bag and walking out the door.

"Hi baby, I'm here," he whispers softly, walking closer to your bed. Your parents had been taking care of you for the past two days because he was busy, but now that he's here, he wants to tell you everything. He knows you're listening, unable to talk. "How are you, love? Is everything okay? Does it hurt?" He asks, gently caressing your hands. He misses your whiny self. Whatever he said, the room was so silent when it was supposed to be filled with your sweet voice. He sighs and closes his eyes, trying to hold in his emotions. "I miss you so much," his voice comes out as a broken whisper. "I can't do this anymore. I can't do this without you, please come back, I'm sorry," he cries, holding your hand close to him. Jaehyun remembers the day the accident happened.

"I'll meet you at home, babe. I love you," he said, cutting the call with a smile on his face. "You make me feel so single," Johnny whispers from his work desk, sighing. "Come on, John. You can bag girls if you try," Jaehyun chuckled as he put on his jacket. "Lucky, you get to go home early while I'm stuck with hyuck, great." Johnny rolls his eyes. Jaehyun just chuckles, walking out of his shared office space.

"So, how was work today?" Jaehyun asked, his eyes focused on the road. "Bad, all that man had to say was I did a bad job and screamed at me. The audacity," you scoffed on the other side of the phone. "Which man? The manager or the CEO?"

"Of course it has to be the manager. He's so annoying I swear," you sighed.

"Oh well, I'll ask him to shut the fuck up next time so he won't annoy you, okay?"

"Ew that was so cheesy, Jae," you cringed behind the phone. Before Jaehyun could even process your reply, loud crashes and screams were heard. He called for you repeatedly, only to realise that you weren't replying.

"I'm so sorry, if I hadn't distracted you, you would still be here for me." Jaehyun cries hard. He looks up at you to see tears running down the side of your face. "Sssh, don't cry," he said, wiping your tears and letting his hand rest on your face. He places a soft kiss on your forehead, his heart hurting at the sight of you. You laid in the bed, limp and pale. "Hey, you know..." He sniffled. "I met your manager on my way here today," he smiled, trying to get the mood better.

"And then, she was trying to write C, but Eun ha wrote it like it was mirrored," Jaehyun giggles softly, his hand still caressing yours. Your hands felt warm to him, and it was the best thing in the world to him. Just as he was about to let the unknown tears in his eyes fall, he felt something. He felt your hand move. His gaze snapped to your hands, which once moved. "Baby, can you do that again for me?" He says hastily, trying not to cry. And he sees a movement, yet again. "Wait for me, I'll go get the doctors, okay?" He says and hurries out of the room, holding himself together. He will come apart any second, but now was not the time.

Doctors rush in and out of the room as Jaehyun watches from the side, tears falling. He had called his mother and asked her to pick Eun ha up from school, just so that he can stay with you longer. "Mr. Jeong?" The doctor called. Jaehyun's cloudy gaze snapped to the doctor, hurrying over to the man. His first clenches in the anticipation of the news as the doctor smiles. "This is the first time I've seen something like this. Her senses are responding to the tests, after a full three years." The doctor tells him. "Is that good?" Jaehyun askes, sniffling. "Yes. Mrs. Jeong's health seems to be progressing so much more than the last three years, she has a higher chance of recovering from the coma for a week or so," Dr. Cho assures him, patting him on the shoulder before he leaves. Jaehyun stares at you for a moment before he comes closer to you. "Hey baby, you're gonna come back to me and Eun ha, aren't you?" Jaehyun asks softly, tears welling in his eyes yet again. "You will, I know it." He kissed your forehead again.

The hopeful week was crucial. Jaehyun visits you everyday of the week with Eun ha, trying his best to make you happy. He'd give his life up for you because what he and his daughter needed the most during this time was you. He had to go to work nevertheless, but you would never be left without a visitor. Mostly being his or your parents and your kid, or him and Eun ha. He was hopeful until the last day of the week rolled over, and he got a call from the doctor.

"Mr. Jeong, I need to talk to you as fast as possible."

"Is there a problem, Dr. Cho?"

He hears a sigh from the other side that sends fear through him.

"We need to talk as fast as possible. Can you make it to the hospital now?"

"Of course, give me 30 minutes, doc,"

Jaehyun cut the call, panic settling within him.

"Johnny, please take care of this document for me. I just got a call from Dr. Cho. I need to go, okay?"

"Yes sir, don't worry about it,"

Johnny said, gesturing to him to hurry on his way. Jaehyun rushed out of the building, getting into his car in no time. In fifteen minutes, he was there at the hospital. He found the same office he's been visiting for the last three years in a couple of minutes, panting as he barged in through the door.

"I was expecting you, Mr. Jeong," Dr. Cho said, sitting upright. He had a bad feeling about what he was going to hear. "I need you to sit down and take a deep breath," the doctor said, sympathy marked in his eyes. Jaehyun sat down hesitatingly, staring at the doctor.

"Would you like something to drink or...?"

"Cut the crap, Dr. Cho,"

Jaehyun snapped. The man just sighed, looking him in the eye. "Your wife, Mrs. Jeong, was pronounced brain dead over 20 minute ago. She had a stroke which caused the brain to stop working," Jaehyun's broken world came crashing down in a few seconds as soon as he heard the news.

"What?"

"Sir, you need to calm-"

"No no no, she hasn't died yet. She can't die yet. You said she was making steady progress, YOU SAID SHE MIGHT WAKE UP, WHY CHANGE YOUR WORDS NOW?!" Jaehyun asked, tears running down his cheeks.

"Jaehyun, listen. It was a stroke that prompted brain death. We can keep her on a machine which pumps oxygen onto her organs which will keep her warm, but it won't do anything,"

"Can you step out for a minute?" Jaehyun asked him, his voice soft. "Of course," the doctor said, moving on his way out.

Jaehyun takes in the news, tears pouring out of his eyes. All he asked for was you and God denied. Great, he hopes that he at least gets to see you one last time. He stepped out of the doctor's office with red eyes and nose. "Can I see her for the last time?" Jaehyun requests, to which the doctor agrees. Tears kept flowing on his way to the room, wiping then with the sleeve of his shirt.

"Go on in," the doctor says, gesturing at the door. Jaehyun holds onto the handle and hesitates before sliding the door open. He keeps his eyes locked on to the floor and when he does lift his eyes, surprise strikes him. You were up, alive and well. Jaehyun blinks before wiping his eyes and looking again. "Jae..." His name rolls off your tongue, bringing him back to earth. He didn't say anything, but he rushed to you and engulfed you in a big hug. He held you close to him, not letting go. It's not like you wanted to let go either. "Jae..." You said, letting your head rest on his shoulder, arms wrapped around him tightly. "I missed you so much," he whispered, breaking into tears again. "God, you're so warm. I missed this so much," you say softly. He missed your voice so much. Jaehyun pulls back gently and stares at your famished face, wiping your tears. "I love you so much, so much," he said, cupping your cheeks in his hands. Your tears ran down again, you missed him so much.

"So what was that?" Jaehyun questions the doctor, glaring at him. "Well uh, your wife had a special request," the doctor smiles, looking away after. "Cho Si-hyeon, I will smack you," he glares, shooting lasers through his eyes. "Hey! Yell at her, not me!" Si-hyeon, his fellow classmate who was a year older than him exclaimed, pointing at you. "No," Jaehyun said, kissing you all over your face as you giggled softly. "She needs to get physiotherapy for her legs and you can go home after," Si-hyeon says, watching them both enjoy each other's presence. "Mhm, 'kay. What else?" Jaehyun said, his gaze fixed on you. "This is disgusting. Bye, I can't stand it," Si-hyeon scrunched his face, leaving the room. "Tsk, he's just jealous that I have such a pretty wife," Jaehyun says and places a small kiss on your lips. "Oh well," you whispered, pulling him into a soft and we'll needed kiss, for both.

❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎❄︎

Taglist: @sparklysung @trying-to-love-myself

#nct smut #k-pop smut #jaehyun #nct 127 smut #nct #nct angst #nct fluff #nct jaehyun #nct fanfic #nct u smut #nct u jaehyun #nct 127 jaehyun #romance #nct senarios

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kittyspotatoes · 2 years

Note

hi hand over a lil "This is gonna hurt like a bitch, but I have to stitch up that wound" with the beloved kisa and kaidan 🔫

Aww crap this is long bc brainrot omfg jiro what did you do 💀

Stupid Together

(AO3 version)

Tools and medicine laid still on a desk. Light from the lamps barely illuminates anything that this room might as well be considered an old storage. One bed occupying the most space, two adventurers refusing to share it.

Crimson eyes gleamed of slight frustration in the dark, yet Kaidan continued to read the parchment with unmatched determination. An instruction for stitching wounds. He'd ask his companion to heal themself but she had used all of it to heal him. Better chance at escape, she said. And they did, so he can't really argue about her with that.

Seated backwards in front of him, Kisa waited with bated breath, keeping her fingers busy twirling red locks into a braid. She's not a mind reader, but the intensity of his emotions are starting to infest the atmosphere. Kinda like bugs on a humid day. Not that he’s giving it away, no, not at all. In fact, Kaidan’s very good at keeping his expressions boring. Under all that, however, is a familiar wildness, a chaos she’d picked up before so many times, in so many people, she’d even describe it as comfortable by now.

A soul is nothing but honest. And to her they will always be.

They had prepared everything needed yet Kaidan still hesitates. With a standing mirror nearby, she props on the seat and observes him review the procedures. Contrary to her striking blues, “His eyes look like rubies”, she thought. Kisa had meant to keep her focus on his eyes, they’re really attractive, after all, but his expression is just as distracting.

"Do you know how to?"

"No-"

"NO??"

"—I mean, I know how, but I've never done it to another.”

A mumbled relief slips out under her breath. "Stop looking constipated at least."

"You're one to talk."

She winced at that but had to crack an impressed smirk.

Sighing, he squints back at her. "If you've got nothing more to say.." He had to keep his temper. But did he really look- er, nevermind. "This is gonna hurt like a bitch, but I need-"

"-need to stitch the wound. Yes. Yes." Kisa had long discarded the shirt, and was nearly done taking off their half-assed first aid on her shoulder anyway.

It took a beat of inaction from him that made Kisa crane her head back. Instead, she felt his hand stopping the act. Was the wound that bad? She expected him to be an ass about it, honestly. But his touch was careful, light even, and he’s anxious… Wait, he's anxious?

"Of what? Am I gonna break? I'm not made of glass—....oh."

This is the first time he’s seeing a good amount of her skin isn’t it.

"It’s okay, Kaidan. It’s just my bad posture in all its glory, don’t be afraid of it."

She’d half a mind to call him out. The stronger people feel something, the more she—or her cursed condition—likely picks up on it. And honestly, it’s more trouble than it’s worth.

“You good, chief? I'll walk it off, don't worry.”

Startled by the intervention, Kaidan peers at their reflection to meet her gaze. "Were you reading my mind??"

"How many times do I have to tell you I can't do that. It's you. Stop overthinking and just do—you’re sort of putting me in a spot here, too.”

A faint red rises on his cheeks. He wasn't always at the end of her, uh, ability, so this caught him off guard.

But if she always had a decent grasp on people’s deepest feelings.. Does that mean she knows he hasn't been able to take his mind off her for weeks now—

"UUHHH…. THERE ONCE WAS A BAKER NAMED RAGNAR THE RED..!" Covering her ears, the woman suddenly became very invested in looking anywhere but him.

Kaidan blinks—hears Inigo and Lucien in the other room respond with a badly synced duet of the next lines—and blinks again. The tip of his ears already burning by the time he could utter out a confused apology while also applauding her for how professionally she evades his attempts of eye contact. This must be that true power of a dragonborn rumors keep talking about. Hold on, this asshole’s confirming what he was just thinking of just now!

“Oi! You knew? You knew didn’t you! All this time..!”

“Gods, you’re impossible! Stop thinking about it or so help me-”

Just as she’s about to get off the chair, Kaidan grabs the top rail—he’s not letting her off the hook so easily. The swordsman dares to lean lower, bringing them dangerously close; and now finally sees she’s as steaming red as he is, if not more.

“Or what.”

He couldn’t help but give her a little frown. Had to keep some level of composure here despite it being like someone’s setting fireworks inside his brain.

“You think I’ll be intimidated by a tomato?”

“Gods damn it, you look the same!” They whisper sharply, lest their companions start sticking their ears on the walls again, those fools.

The woman forces her way out of the tempting confinement which was Kaidan’s arms, picking her stinking shirt over their strapping friend—okay that’s enough. “I was born yesterday, I don’t understand these accusations!” But Kaidan’s never been more determined to get an answer before than this moment. They race towards the door like children scrambling for the last piece of cake, Kaidan beating her to it by the end.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Never in his life did he ever saw himself confessing to someone like this. But he’s here anyway. Like the fool he is.

“..er. Because you weren’t saying anything…?” Saying it like that makes it seem like she really wanted him to make the first move, huh. Which was not a bad idea itself, but dear gods if Kaidan’s terrible at this then so is she. Guess they’re both stupid.

“Right? Well.. Looks like I am now.” His frown softens, turning into a hopeful one. He’d take her rejection over her silence any time any day.

“Why do you even want my opinion on it?” Kisa flails her arms, looking like she’s about to combust any moment. “Your thoughts are yours!”

“Because they’re about you, you bloody idiot! I’m in love with you!”

It might have been adrenaline kicking in the weirdest times, or a one in a million chance where everything is right, or maybe she just wants him to shut up.

Either way, what distance sets them apart suddenly doesn't exist now. Auri and Rumarin might have complained about a loud pounding on their door—not like the two inside paid any attention to it, only that the door remained closed.

They were waves pushing back on each other, sending ripples of sensation that set their veins ablaze. A thousand torchbugs awakening under their skins.

And theirs was a touch of a side never seen, of butterflies leaving trails of scorching heat.

And they were a moment unique to the rest of the world, forever imprinted on each other's histories.

Flaring hues that turn the stars into but faint glimmers, they are a starburst of the brightest colors and she willingly surrenders herself into it.

"-ow! Sir, I got a bruise there-"

"Uh- sorry. Sorry, you alright?"

Both out of breath, the sudden pause forced them to realize what just happened… well, happened.

"I, uh-.. I don't know what-"

"What the hell was that?"

"Uhh... An answer?"

Kaidan, for some reason, lands his sights on the inviting mattress, subjecting himself to a new set of thoughts to struggle against.

"......"

Kisa did the same and felt a sudden urge to commit destruction of property.

"......"

The bed, while empty and enticing and would keep them warm on such a cold night, witnessed them in quiet and is now the most menacing thing within their vicinity.

"Er-..." Kaidan clears his throat. The woman snaps at his direction like a soldier called to attention. "Wanna grab a drink?"

"Oh.. Just one, seriously? How am I gonna recover from this heartbreak?" Ah now there it is, the smug bastard that he knows.

The party ended up going to an apothecary the next day anyway. Kaidan couldn't patch up Kisa. Apparently, the two went out to drink and ended up sleeping on the tavern floor.

They were stupid together.

#oc: kisa #kaidan skyrim #dhwjdkfnfhd thank u impromptu oneshot????#the way i couldnt write for shit dhaiqpwkAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #ship: red string #dragonborn oc #skyrim #asks #this is just fluff #kaidan being ???? and kisa being ¿¿¿¿

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hearteyes-for-killmonger · 3 years

Text

COLORS, PART 2

*Smutless

Before I even look at anyone else's work, I reinforce sharp lines and darken the darkest areas on my painting with blue tones and deep browns. I'm working on organic matter, a bouquet of flowers and it requires trusting my eyes. I can't paint in the way that feels good, I have to be precise for realism.

"Much better," Yaya nods and I smile having not noticed that she was standing behind me watching. "After one class too and no one told you anything," she adds.

"Imagine if I got some real feedback."

"Mr. Peters," she calls gently to the professor who comes right over. He's young and cute with locs and a septum piercing. A little kooky, but loved by his students and eager to help.

"How can I help you?"

"Criticize Meg's painting. What's she missing?"

"Honest critique," he asks and I nod. "Beautiful but it doesn't give realism. You left no room for the halo effect around the outer petal and your red leans too brown, that part is pink," he points the mid-petal. Black is not an outline color, retire your black completely. White it not an outline or highlight. Also that flower petal would have a tiny amount of speckling realistically. I'd typically use a toothbrush and splash with the bristles, but do what you can.. Keep going, you're doing so well."

"Gee thanks..." Looking at my painting with fresh eyes, I need to start over. I know I can do this way better and I'm excited to try, but I don't have the time. I have to suck it up and finish this current painting.

"What did Kellan say about your work of art last week," Yaya asks suddenly. "Could he see a difference in your technique?"

"I told you Kellan don't give a damn about my techniques or my skill level. He doesn't have an eye. He sees paint on canvas and to him it's finger painting."

"So you ain't show him. Is that because of the subject of the painting?"

"You mean the big black dick? Maybe. He's not..," I don't wanna sound mean but, "He don't understand art. He wouldn't see it how we see it. If I show him that painting he's gonna it's pornographic and then he'll think something that ain't true and I don't feel like dealing with that."

"Doesn't sound like you're compatible."

"You were just caping for him last week," I glare. "You should pick a stance."

"Oop! Well how about I'm not caping, I thought I was helping you look at things a different way because you can be harsh."

"Harsh? Because I see how things are and I tell you? You don't accept it until you repeat it. Then you wanna act like you told me something new. That's one thing that drives me crazy about you."

"I can think of more than a couple things about y-"

"Okay y'all ruining the energy in this room," Francis' voice rises. "It's a beautiful day today, sun shining!"

It is.. We're all painting the same thing today and Yaya's looks better than mine again, but I can see why and how and part of it is her colors. They aren't muddy. "Use more paint," she says reading my mind. "Don't be scared to use it up. Then when you want to mix in a tiny amount of a new color you have more to work with, less paint stroke, less mud."

"I can't wait to start this over or paint something else," I say plopping paint on my picture. At this point I just want it finished. "I'm gonna paint my mom's houseplant at home soon as I get there."

"Mama," I call through the apartment wondering if she's in her room or maybe the bathroom. I can't find her anywhere. "Where you at ma," I yell before calling her cell. She picks up on the third ring and who do I hear in the background? My boyfriend loud and clear laughing.

"Who's that," he whispers suddenly. I could scream. Who did he think?!

"We at Friday's what you want back?"

"Back? Ma.. Y'all really went to eat without me?!"

"Oh girl hush."

"Why was Kellan at the house and y'all ain't care to call me? That's aight.. I'm coming now."

"Megan, chill," Kellan cuts in.

"What? You don't want me there?"

"I ain't say that.."

"Tuh! Look nigga. This between me and MY mama so you can butt outta this one."

"HEY," she snaps but she's cut off.

"I'm just tryna know mom a bit more. I'll see you when I bring her back," Kellan says. "Love you," they say in unison. The call drops and I'm left staring at my phone screen. I didn't even get to tell them what I wanted from there.

Grabbing the keys to my mom's car, I go there anyway and I look from the door once I'm inside to see if I see them sitting down at a booth or at the bar, but they're not in there. Curious, I sit in the car and call again.

"Y'all ain't even get my order before you rudely hung up. Before y'all leave Friday's can I get the chicken and shrimp?"

"Yup," she says.

"How's the food, y'all been there a while."

"I'm not gossiping about you if that's what you asking," she mumbles and I roll my eyes wondering what would make them lie to me.

"Nevermind. I'm a let y'all enjoy each other's company without me," I snap hanging up. I go into the Fridays and get a free chicken sandwich and when I get home I start painting. I use every tip to create something that looks like I didn't even paint it, that's how good it looks and I'm only half done when mom and Kellan mozy through the door laughing with mom holding a food bag. "Is that my food," I ask.

"Yeah, lil girl, take this bag and gone."

Kellan laughs and tries to kiss me on the forehead but I move and ignore him until he gets the point.

"Seriously..," he kisses his teeth and I take my stuff to my room, closing the door. I'm close to breaking up with him.

"And then they lied about where they went that's what really pissed me off," I seethe squeezing the hell out of my Sprite. It's a vending machine and student lounge day. Yaya has McDonald's that she got her other friend to bring her.

"Take half these fries." She dumps them on a napkin. "Maybe they went to a different Friday's."

I glare. "No, Yaya."

"Okay then they lied. What you gonna do about it, dump them both?" She squeezes ketchup on her fries and I grab the other pack.

"No just him. I don't want to, but he's really irritating me with these mommy issues and he doesn't think it's a problem."

"Alright so dump him. Maybe you can go for that model guy. What's his name?"

"I don't wanna just dump him though, you don't get it. I want to because he's pissing me off but then again I don't want to because I do still like him. I just want him to take me serious and stop!"

"But he hasn't and you know he won't.. so NEXT. What about that guy?"

"Erik? I don't know what to think about him and I don't need to trade one issue for another one if you feel me."

"You only spoke to him twice, maybe if y'all had an actual conversation.."

"You saw how that went when I tried."

"He was doing a job, what did you expect? Him to stop and talk to you the whole time?"

Nah.. Just most of it. "Besides when would I run into him again, those two times were by chance." The gallery showing comes to mind. I took the brochure from COLORS when I went and the event starts this Friday and lasts the weekend. Slim odds of catching him if he goes. "Anyway, I'm just venting to you. Not asking for instant solutions."

She shrugs sipping her drink, simple as that.

"So I'm going to the gallery event Friday night if my mama lends me the car."

"And there it is," she smirks from around her straw. "You act like you don't need my advice but in the end you always take it."

"Shut the fuck up," my face cracks. I wanna mean mug but my lip keeps twitching.

"That's why good things happen for you."

"Anyway.. If he's there I'll get at him. If not, I'm enjoying the gallery so win-win."

COLORS is transformed when I walk in. Paintings line the walls and I decide to start from the left and walk my way around the entry room. They did well balancing the crappy canvases with the icy ones. They're all landscapes. Grassy hills with ponds and windmills or trees. Oceans meeting the sky. The Savannah. Dirt.. Rain.. Storms. The topic changes with every room or space. When I get to the sip & paint room, it's human portraits. If I had known I could submit mine, I would've. Still, it's fun to look at everyone else's. I see April's name next to a painting of a guy, not Erik, but a different model. I wonder if anyone else submitted their work.

Moving onto the next cluster of portraits I see a tall beanie from the corner of my eye. Turning, I'm shocked to find my ulterior motive for coming standing eight feet away from me, staring at a portrait.

"Erik," I whisper getting his attention and he does a double take. He hadn't noticed me. "We can't keep meeting like this, just say you want me," I joke rubbing my palms together. He loves it, he's smiling as he comes over to my side draping his arm over my shoulders.

"Where's your painting," he asks now scanning the wall for it.

"At home. I didn't know we could submit them for this, I surely would have." I really would have, I'm a little disappointed that I didn't know.

"Aw, I wanted to see it.. I showed you mine..," his eyes twinkle flirtatiously. He really is a troll.. but not better than me.

"And it was (chef's kiss)," I tease watching humor briefly flood his eyes. "I'll bring my painting to show you but when would I see you?"

He thinks about it. "When you coming by COLORS again?"

"Rather than a drive-by why don't we just paint one night?"

"Aight," he nods. "Say when. I have classes, but when I'm free.."

"What school you go to?"

"Brandman.. You know it?"

My face gives it away. Of course I know it, that's Kellan's school. I wonder if they ever met.

"What program?"

"General Business."

That's Kellan's program.

"You know Kellan?" I'm on edge right now.

"Yeah I know Kellan, wait.. you hisss- ?"

"Girlfriend," I fill in the blank and he nods letting go of my shoulders. In this moment I wish I were single. This just got awkward.

"Look," he sighs. "I don't want any negative energy surrounding me, my karmic energy is pure as of now.. So please don't take it wrong that I can't meet up with you in good conciousness."

"We can't.. be friends?" I shrug. I sound crazy right now.

"We can, but nothing beyond. No flirtation," he stares laying down the law. I get it. No line crossing.

"That's all I had in mind," I smile, a lie on my breath. If he smells it he doesn't call it out. "What's your contact, we can link and paint. I'll still bring the portrait."

He gives me his number and we part ways, him moving on to enjoy the exhibit while I move in a different direction to do the same. I don't notice when he leaves, I only notice that I haven't seen him. When I leave, I call my mom.

"Bring my car," she says. She leaves almost as soon as I get there so I call Kellan to come over.

"Hey baby," he greets squeezing my cheeks at the door like I'm five. I don't like that because my older brother used to do that before he moved. I stare as Kellan goes in the fridge for juice like he lives here.

"Why can't you kiss me like a normal boyfriend? I don't understand."

"What? Aw, come here. Big baby." He gives me a bear hug planting his lips on my forehead which isn't much different to me, but whatever. I'm tired of talking about it. I pull him to my room and push him to my bed. Of course he doesn't fight me, he just falls and lets me climb him. "You feeling frisky huh," he grins. I hate that word. My hand goes directly over his mouth.

"Don't talk." The more he talks the more turned off I get. He double hand smacks my ass and it helps, I'm back into it. We makeout until he moves me from on top.

"Left the condoms in the car. Be right back."

"Man hurry up," I yell after him and his clumsy ass knocks over my painted canvas which was backwards for a reason. He gets a glimpse and does a double take, stooping to pick it up and look at me. Here we go.

"What's this," his eyes go back and forth from the painting to my face.

"What it look like?"

"Who is this?"

"Don't start that, it's a model. I painted that last week. I also painted that self portrait," I point, "Those plants," I point again, "That fruit bowl." Neither of which are paintings he cared to see. I'd have shown him.

"Whose dick is this and why you painting naked men, was you in the room with him?"

"The room?"

"Here.. or his place?"

"Are you dumb? That's not how it works." He looks like I'm lying, his side-eye trained on me. "This is why I can't share my art with you, you either don't care or you judgy. I don't like that."

"I don't like you drawing dicks and thinking that's cool. You had to really focus on it didn't you? Did you like it?"

"Oh my God," I'm regretting calling him over now. If it's not one issue with him it's another. "It's ART. You don't see like that as an artist. It's purely interpreting and recording the human form."

"But you ain't deny it.. You liked looking at it."

"What is wrong with you? I'm not doing this with you, I don't have to explain myself." That fast I'm over it and I want him out. "You can go. I'm tired. I'm going to sleep."

"You want me out so you can call this nigga," he mutters. "Who is he? I know him. He looks familiar."

He's staring at the picture so hard I decide to tell him. It's not like I have anything to hide. "He's an art model. Me and my classmates went to COLORS, a sip & paint where we all created these artworks.. and as it turns out you do know him. He goes to Brandman."

"I knew he looked familiar," he mutters still staring at the picture.

"Yeah, he said he knows you. Decent guy. I told him I was your girlfriend. Very respectful." He looks up at that and I roll my eyes. I shouldn't even be explaining. "You know, you could come to COLORS if you're that concerned."

He sits my painting back down and rubs through his mass or curly hair like he's stressed. I don't understand why he's so bothered by this, but I knew it would happen. "When," he asks.

"I'll let you know. In the meantime, goodbye because I'm tired.. of this conversation and your nonsense, I knew you'd trip over absolutely nothing."

"Nothing looks like a whole lot that I ain't fuckin with.. I bet ma don't know about this."

"GET OUT." I all but shove him out the door. I'd dump him right now if I didn't think he'd attribute it to Erik. Also Erik would think I did it because of him. I have to wait. I should've just dumped him back when Yaya said something. I don't even wanna go to COLORS anymore because all Kellan will do is ruin the vibe.

From the time Erik came through the door, Kellan has been acting up and saying lil slick shit that Erik's been graciously ignoring. It's embarrassing! Luckily I warned Erik about Kellan ahead of time so he knew what to expect. I, however, was somehow still caught off guard.

Moving his brush across the canvas, Erik's focused face is one worth painting. "You have to have an artistic bone in you somewhere Kells.. Eeeeveryone has one thing.. they can do artistically."

"Nah. I'm not artistic and I don't care for it outside of Megan's art."

"Hm," I mutter so only Kellan hears it. He doesn't care for my art either, but I keep that to myself and work on my painting. It's a guided paint night where we all paint the same picture, a star fall over snowcapped mountains and steep water valleys. I peak at Kellan's painting. "That's a cute mountain, you know if you use your brush and stipple you could get some texture." Taking a brush, I dip it in a little paint just to show him what I mean.

"You gone paint it or me," he says, so I put the brush down and let him do him.

"Small world.. How y'all meet?"

"We kept bumping into each other," I answer though it was addressed to both Erik and I. "Rest is history."

"Where and when did y'all bump into each other?"

Turning to Kellan, I mouth 'stop' because he's about to make things awkward AGAIN. I wish I didn't invite him, but I thought he'd chill if he saw there was nothing going on. Erik's been trying to be chill the whole time but I see the irritation. "I'm sorry you got wrapped up in this," I apologize as he tries to make it look like it's no big deal.

"Don't apologize for me," Kellan blurts with silence following. It's so much negative energy.

"So Erik.." We need a subject change. "How good is that model money? I may be interested."

"No you not. You'll do no such thing," Kellan stares, daring me to oppose. It takes me right back to being irritated.

"Don't tell me what to do Kellan. You ain't ever did that before I don't know why you think it's cool now.. Anyway.. How is it," I ask Erik again.

"You get a lil something, it depends. Ask me again in the winter."

"Oh no, stick to the warm weather I got you!"

"You ain't got shit. Ma would kill you," Kellan blurts.

"You mean MY mom would kill me? Mine?? I'm grown.. What are you talking about," I glare.

"You grown until ma beat that ass. That's broke hoe activity, getting naked for people. Call it whatever you want, you're still showing your body. Male or female."

I pause. "This from the nigga fuckin me in my mama's house?.. Try again. And call her ma one more time, I'ma sleep you. I keep telling you stop acting like we siblings. It's weird. I already have a big brother and you are not him."

"You salty. Don't bring up personal issues in public, that's a me and you situation."

"What the! I'm about to-" I wanna slap this blue paint on his face. "I can't do this." I drop my brush and grab my bag. "I gotta go, Erik, I'm sorry and I hope we can still be cool. If not, I get it. Completely. I'm out though."

Kellan follows me out. "You forget we came together?"

"Nah you did. What the fuck was that in there," I point to COLORS. We're in the parking lot. "You had to embarrass me, didn't you?"

"So I'm an embarrassment."

"Take me home," I snap jumping in the passenger seat of his car. When we get to my building I get out and slam the door. "I'm done. We're over, don't call me don't at me."

"It's because of Erik, ain't it. You wanted him that's why you creating problems with me."

"It's because of yo ass! I tell you the same thing all the time. You don't care, you don't listen. You ain't interested in nothing I'm interested in. You won't even try and tonight doesn't count because the only reason you came with me was to embarrass me. You were rude as fuck for what? Jealousy? He barely said two words."

"Bet you can quote both though." He looks so smug.

"You ain't hear nothing else I said."

When I get to the apartment, I look at the painting I meant to show Erik. I left it in my room because Kellan wanted me to give it to Erik for him to keep so I couldn't look at it.. As if I sit in my room lusting over painted dick. Either way, I wasn't about to give it up, it's portfolio material. Kellen can go.. if anything.

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