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#needless to say i am no longer reading this story
chrollohearttags · 2 months
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long winded ass post I contemplated not writing but did it anyways. read if you’d like or ignore lmao.
so I feel as though this kind of goes without saying but a lot has changed on tumblr and the vibe has shifted a lot, sadly, not for the better either :/ I thought about this for a while and although last week, I was not posting any new content due to the strike, I’ve decided to step away from writing in general after this month. I could sit here and go on a tangent about how it’s the ‘algorithm’ and ‘dying fandoms’ but to me, this boils down to the fact that I refuse to exhaust myself to be unappreciated + disrespected. That’s not to say I’m ungrateful to everyone who reblogs and comments on my works all the time because I am incredibly grateful! I love each of you and I look forward to reading your tags/thoughts. However, it’s not lost on me that the anime fandom in general is becoming shrouded in toxicity and many of us are being pushed away. We’re in an age where people are seen as content machines and not humans so others feel entitled to their art and feel no need to be kind, understanding or empathetic to that person’s feelings. I’m not wasting my time trying to teach people manners that they should’ve learned a long time ago. I refuse to share my craft with people like that. And to say the quietest part out loud: y’all don’t want black writers around, PERIOD. One scroll through the dash shows that much. As someone who’s written primarily for AOT (not changing btw) and specifically the black side of the fandom, it’s almost laughable at the extreme lengths that ppl have gone through to see it be erased. And I don’t mean getting fics hit with labels or reporting (that failed so they switched to plan B.) since I began back writing in 2020-21, it was obvious that it was the most popular among black girls and I remember ppl telling me to write for them. Hell, it’s the sole reason I even watched. Needless to say, I fell in love with the show and it holds a special place in my heart. However, I realized I didn’t need any of the original material. Not only that, in all the years I’ve been writing, it’s the first time I’ve seen so many black girls resonating and happy with a group of characters. It was the first and only time I’ve seen stories where I didn’t feel as though them being a black character was a hidden secret or toned down to appeal to others (no shade). It was in my face and proud, even if I didn’t personally resonate with the reader or concept of the story. It still felt good coming from a fandom where I was literally the ONLY black writer in it. Fast forward and I clearly see that now, it’s not welcomed. We could sit here and blame it on non-blk (yt) having the problems but that’s a load of bullshit and the only enemies we have are one another. It’s been other black writers who have littered the tags with discourse abt the same stupid topic to avoid new fics being seen. It’s been other black writers who have switched fandoms when they were no longer the ONLY ones bc coexisting is just too damn hard apparently. It’s been other black authors who have made it blatantly clear that they are only interested in seeing and creating stories that are palatable to other races so they won’t be perceived in a negative light or to be seen as one of the ‘good ones’. Even down to not using black reader tags or avoiding coded language. So much so, they are comfortable laughing at anti-black rhetoric being pushed on other apps so as long as their new favs are not the brunt of the joke.
I’m not here to tell anybody how or what to write. I’m not here to say you ONLY have to like one show but what I am saying is that i will NOT be spending hours and days agonizing over a fic for it to be minimized to a joke for a bitch on TikTok. I will not spend the little free time I have trying to crunch and finish a fic for it not do well but watch y’all pile in my mentions to argue over nonsense. And I won’t sit here and watch y’all purposely try to run other black writers away bc they don’t fit ur aesthetic. Fiction is fiction and whether you resonate with it or not, it’s expression. I’m a boring ass country bumpkin from the middle of nowhere, Florida who’s got social anxiety, chronically ill, neurodivergent and is in bed by 10:00. I don’t smoke, never had sex and I literally never leave the house unless I’m grocery shopping. I never have and never will live the life of any of my characters, even the most tame ones. But I write for EVERY black girl and want everyone of them to be seen. The one space where that seems to be allowed is obviously not welcomed anymore. Arguing and trying to defend ourselves against people who are committed to misunderstanding us is pointless. Minimizing us down to ‘baby mama’, ‘hoodrat’ fics, simply bc you no longer like certain characters (many of which you all were writing for not too long ago) is quite frankly clown and coon ass behavior. Watching y’all become enraged by tropes that are used by ever race, every fandom, etc but turning the blind eye bc it suits ur narrative is fucking hypocritical and laughable at best.
I’m not insecure in my writing. Never have been and never will be. I know I pour everything I have into creating the best work I can and it’s for that reason that I won’t allow it to be treated like trash. I have over 250 drafts in my Google docs and best believe, that’s where they’ll stay until I see fit. Although I know it’ll probably mean leaving the last place I have any sense of community and social interaction in general, it’s not worth coming on here angry everyday in defense mode. Its not worth getting out of my character over and I rather just not be around if it means I have to play mean girl. My mind may change and all of this will just have been me getting shit off my chest but as of right now, this account will be archived come February 28th. Thank you to everybody who’s supported me this far and gave me a safe space. I love all of you so very much and hope that we can enjoy the rest of this month together 🫶🏾 🤍
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raspberryfingers · 11 months
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A Lion in the Garden -Tywin Lannister x Reader- (Part 30)
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WARNING: NSFW/Mentions of sex
A/N: AHH alright, so I'm kind of losing it. It's genuinely hard to believe that A Lion in the Garden is over, or at least plot wise anyways. Because yes, I am going to go back and edit, along with adding new chapters into the main plotline to help with pacing and all that, but this is the end of Lady Tyrell and Tywin’s story and it is honestly making me emotional. I started this story in late November, and in the last six months I’ve written about 170,000 words about these two, which is around 300 pages the way that I have it formatted in google docs. So, needless to say, this has been quite the journey for me and also for all of you who have been reading as I publish. And a giant thank you to everyone who’s shown support for my story, because even when I was busy or lacking motivation, knowing that there were at least a few people desperate for the next chapter made me keep working, and now I’m here. Anyways, with all that said, please enjoy the last chapter and know that I am so grateful for all my readers <3
—————
To finally be in the tower of the hand was a blessing. I had spent no less than three hours in the great hall, and if I’d been stuck there any longer I might’ve gone mad. Thankfully, Tywin knew me well enough to know that my patience was wearing thin, and had distracted a few lords so I could slip away. 
It was about 10:00 when I made it back to our chambers, and instantly I collapsed on one of the sofas in Tywin’s bedroom, removing my shoes with a sigh. I massaged my feet and ankles, tired after quite literally standing still for hours on end. If I had been walking the whole time it would’ve been fine, but it was like I had been stuck.
“King Tywin Lannister…” I muttered to myself, getting up from the sofa and going over to the mirror. I could’ve rang for Cerella, but it was late, and the last thing I wanted was to be rude. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure I could tolerate a conversation right now. All I wanted was to let my hair down, remove my gown, and fall asleep.
No, that wasn’t all I wanted. I wanted Tywin beside me too. 
But he probably wouldn’t have the chance to join me until much later, and I couldn’t wait for him. Sighing, I grabbed at the pins in my hair, taking them out and running my fingers through it afterwards. It had not relieved my headache as much as I had hoped. 
I reached backward then, watching myself in the mirror as I undid my dress. I suddenly wished that Tywin had dressed me in red this morning, for at least I could’ve felt connected to him that way. The entire day—though not purposefully, of course—he had been so distant, and now all I wanted was to feel like he was with me. 
My dress fell to the floor, and I undid the rest of my unnecessary undergarments with a sigh of relief. I turned to go towards the dresser and find a nightgown, but I noticed that one had already been laid out on a chair. I was unable to hold back a smile, grabbing my gown and other undergarments from the floor and folding them as neatly as I could. Cerella had known me well enough to understand that I wouldn’t want to speak to anybody at this hour, and so she had set out my nightgown in advance. Gods, I loved her. 
I set my clothes down on the chair, taking the nightgown in my hands once I had and slipping into it. I found that I dearly missed the warm nights that Tywin and I had spent nude, lazily sprawled out under the thin silk sheets. The nights had become colder, and soon the days would too. After that, it would only be a matter of time before the ravens came from the citadel. Then the blankets and furs on our bed would pile, and I would press myself closer against him. Perhaps that was not so unfortunate. 
I slipped into bed, pulling the blanket up to the bottom of my neck and finding a comfortable position. I settled into the mattress with a sigh, my head sinking into the pillow with a sort of relief. It was odd, however, to be falling asleep without Tywin by my side. The bed felt too light without him, and I wondered if I would be able to sleep without the sound of his breathing beside me. 
King Tywin Lannister.
Everytime I found myself drifting off, that came back to me. It was still such a shocking concept, and I wanted it to feel normal more than anything. For some reason, though, I simply couldn’t make it sound correct. Queen (Y/N) Tyrell. 
A small shiver went up my back, and I had to turn onto my other side in bed. I kept hoping for the sound of Tywin’s boots outside the door, but they would not come. It was almost funny to me, how much comfort was derived from a man that plenty of people considered an insufferable cunt. Myself included, let it be known. 
And yet still, I felt restless without him. I had a million questions to ask, and a million reassurances I wished to receive. Although, I guessed he was worse off than I was, probably surrounded by far too many noblemen… and noblewomen.
Now I was lying on my back, a sort of jealousy sparking in me and making my body go hot. Never before had I ever felt that somebody would try and disrupt my relationship with Tywin, but if he was to be king, surely the title of queen looked appealing to many ladies. Just as I was certain the concept of birthing little princes and princesses did.
Would Tywin want children now? His relationship with Tyrion had improved, yes, but would he go so far as to put him on the throne? I wondered if that was better or worse than Casterly Rock. But that was only for a moment, because the idea of heirs was most important. I knew for certain that the titles of prince and princess had not changed my feelings, but sometimes Tywin was hard to predict. Although, if I hadn’t been so tired and my head not so clouded, I would’ve known instantly that his opinion upon the subject had not changed.
Eventually, this train of thought became so tiring that it no longer made sense, and the words in my head were not coherent any longer, especially as I had turned back onto my side and closed my eyes once more. My breathing had begun to slow as well, and slowly but surely I drifted off.
In my dreams, I was on the battlefield. I somehow knew that Tywin was there, but I did not see him. The other odd thing was that it had been snowing, and it was somewhat reminiscent of Winterfell. It was unlike any battle I'd ever been in.
—————
Tywin was utterly exhausted. He had been in constant discussion ever since you’d left the hall, and it was now approaching 2:00 in the morning. He was making his way up the tower of the hand, already grasping at the top of his coat and undoing the clips. It was unlike him to undress anywhere besides his chambers, but gods he couldn’t help it. 
All he wanted was to slip into bed beside your warm body and hold you close, because just as you needed his support, he needed yours. He was not an overly emotional person, but he could admit that to feel you in his arms would relieve the unbearable amount of stress he had accumulated in the last 24 hours. He had single handedly made House Lannister the most powerful and placed them on the throne; it was truly a wonder. 
Tywin did not bother looking at the guards outside his door when he entered his office, he only pushed the door open with a slight sigh and carefully shut it behind him. It wouldn’t have been enough to wake you up regardless, but it was so quiet that he did not want to disturb the silence.
He fully shrugged off his coat now, draping it over his arm as he went towards the bedroom door. That one was handled carefully too, opened and closed as softly as was possible. There were a few dim candles lit, but overall the room was quite dark. He could see you, though, lying in bed with your face turned toward the door. 
The candles were behind you for the most part, and it gave your figure a pleasant outline. Although, your face was partly buried in the pillow, and an odd feeling of guilt ran through Tywin. Had you been crying? 
He took light steps across the room, placing his coat down on the same chair that you had left your gown. He sat down in another, reaching down to pull off his boots with a soft groan. Once he had done that, he untucked his shirt from his pants and then continued to strip. Tywin found his black robe in the dresser and promptly slipped it over his head, periodically looking over to make sure you were still asleep.
Entirely ready to sleep now, he approached your side of the bed. He lifted his hand to your face, the back of his fingers brushing against your cheek. It did not feel as though you had been crying, but it was impossible to tell. He felt the pillowcase too, and was reassured by the dryness there. No, you had not been crying. 
Quietly, Tywin made his way around the bed until he reached his side, carefully lifting the blankets and getting in with as little disruption as was possible. You seemed relatively undisturbed by the shifting of the mattress, and he knew he had not woken you. Tywin laid on his back with a quiet sigh, feeling utterly relieved to finally be in bed and alone. It felt like being alone, at least, for your company was never disruptive to him.
He had been drifting to sleep, but was suddenly startled by a jolting beside him. When Tywin opened his eyes, he saw you shake beside him. He moved to reach over and hold you, but you had shot straight up with a gasp, and he could see a sort of fear in your eyes.
“(Y/N)? Are you alright?” He asked, having to clear his throat as he sat up and placed his hands on your arms. You looked over at him—as if processing that he was there—and then nodded. Something had clearly started you. “A bad dream?” he questioned, gently cupping your cheek and bringing your forehead to his lips. 
“Yes, y-yes. It was just a bad dream,” you whispered in reply, swallowing. The way you said it gave the odd impression that you were trying to remind yourself of it, not that you were telling Tywin. He gave you a sympathetic look, though you did not notice.
“Come, sweet girl. Let us sleep,” Tywin whispered, slowly coaxing you back down to the mattress. He sighed out airily when you moved closer to him, wrapping your arms around his torso. He could feel your stress and uncertainty being relieved as you held him, and he could not keep himself from holding you with the same ferocity. 
Tywin clutched at you, wrapping his arms entirely around you and pressing you to his body as much as was physically possible. He knew he wouldn’t, but there was an odd desire in him to sob. He did not want to be the king, all he wanted was to remain here with you.
“Oh Tywin…” you muttered, inhaling his scent with an overwhelming sense of comfort. Your own scent was simultaneously giving him the same feeling. You had begun to nuzzle into him, too, much as a lion would. In response, his hand had come to your hair, cupping your head as one does for an infant. It had come from some sort of protective instinct, and even knowing that there was nothing to fear, Tywin would not let go. 
His queen.
With both of you feeling utterly at peace in each other's arms, it did not take long to fall asleep. You had drifted off first, and the sound of your tired breathing had sent Tywin to sleep right after you. He had been so glad to hold you, and perhaps even a bit happy that you were tired and disoriented, for you had asked no questions. Those would come in the morning, he knew. 
Tywin would happily answer them then, but for now, all he wanted was sleep. And with you wrapped up in his arms, that was no strenuous task at all.
—————
Tywin had woken up before me, though he had not left our bed. When I opened my eyes, I understood that I was cuddled against his chest. However, when I looked up at his face, he was already smiling down at me.
“Goodmorning, my dear,” he said, his voice a bit deeper and harsher than usual. He must’ve not been up for long. I smiled, adjusting myself and sitting up slightly before reaching over to kiss him. Tywin gave a soft hum against my lips, hand coming to my hair as he kissed me back. The mornings that he got to stay in bed with me were always the best ones.
“Goodmorning, Tywin. What time did you come to bed last night?” I questioned, laying back down and resting my head on his shoulder. I felt his hand lifting my nightgown, and then suddenly his warm palm against my hip. He loved to feel the skin there, for some odd reason. Though, I would never complain, for I loved it too.
“Far too late. I only managed to escape the great hall at 2:00. Your nightmare woke up just after I came to bed,” he said, resting his chin on my head. I furrowed my eyebrows, as I did not remember waking from my dreams. I had experienced a nightmare, yes, but waking up because of it? I certainly could not recall that. Well, it was of no importance.
“I see. If you’d really wanted to, you would’ve left much earlier,” I said, knowing him better than that. Tywin Lannister would never do something he didn’t want to. At least not something like that.
“It would have been inappropriate.”
“Oh yes, I’m certain.”
I laughed, shaking my head at how ridiculous my husband managed to be. I suspected not a man like him had ever lived, nor ever would again. It was almost comical, for Tywin Lannister was rarer than a dragon. 
“We have much to discuss,” Tywin said after a moment, instantly making my smile fade. I could hear in his voice that he similarly did not want to, but felt it necessary. He was right, of course. 
“Yes, we certainly do.”
“What’s most important to me, (Y/N), is that you’re alright. You shook during the ceremony yesterday. It’s all been somewhat overwhelming and sudden, hasn’t it?” He asked softly, one of his hands reaching for mine and holding it. I nodded, sighing out and glancing around the room. 
“I suppose I- well, I hadn’t even considered that you had a claim. For some reason, the only two I had suspected were Jaime and Tyrion, and when I heard men in the hall discussing that it ought to be you, it did shock me. But it’s not you being king which frightens me, it’s the idea of me being queen. I’m nothing like my sister in that regard,” I admitted, suddenly finding one of the tapestries on the wall to be the most interesting thing I’d ever seen. Tywin had it put up after our wedding, and I hadn’t really taken any appropriate amount of time to consider it. There was something so beautiful and erotic about the nude figures, and it was a perfect distraction from my embarrassment.
Tywin suddenly moved beside me, and I realized he wanted to get up from bed. I moved off him, sitting up and watching him quizzically as he went over to a drawer and rummaged around. When he seemingly did not find what he was looking for there, he left the room. I simply waited, absolutely puzzled as to what he was doing. I assumed that like always, he was trying to prove a point.
He came back in with a rather large, rolled up parchment in his hands. He set it down on the table, undoing it and then using books that were already on the table to keep it open. Tywin then turned around and motioned for me to come over. I did so, scooting off the edge of the bed and adjusting my nightgown as I walked over to him.
He had laid out a map on the table, and after a minute it clicked in my head. It was a map of King’s Landing. I raised both eyebrows at him as a signal to explain, knowing he was going to come to a point eventually. 
“As you are aware, the smallfolk of King’s Landing are not entirely fond of me. If I’m to be their king, my reforms must actually have a directly positive impact on their lives. Tell me, how do I improve a city ripe with crime, disease, overcrowding, and homelessness?” Tywin questioned, gesturing to the map he had laid out. I let out a breath that was almost a laugh, feeling that the question was impossible. Staring at the map was not helping me any.
“You cannot improve all of those things single handedly, Tywin. Therefore, I cannot possibly have any ideas that would do such a thing,” I said, knowing that we needed to be realistic in this instance. He still hadn’t come to his point yet, and it was irking me. 
“It’s not single handedly, I have you. But even if I didn’t, that’s not what I mean. Give me a solution to just one of those problems, please,” he said, gazing down at me with a sort of twinkle in his eye. Where was he going with this? I looked at him hesitantly for a moment, but when all I received was an expectant look I knew he was serious.
With a sigh, I turned my eyes to the map once more. Gods, the layout of Kings Landing was absolutely horrendous. It was no wonder that overcrowding was a problem just based on the way that everything was structured. And of course, overcrowding led to disease, so I supposed a solution to the overcrowding would perhaps help that as well. The idea came to me then.
“Tywin, where was Tommen’s carriage destroyed?” I asked, turning to my husband for a moment. His expression was blank, but he pointed down to a certain street on the map.
“Right around here.”
“Well surely that much wildfire must’ve destroyed some of the street and the buildings around it, right?” I questioned, feeling that it must’ve been a completely logical assumption.
“Correct. I was told that these complexes here are practically ruins now, and several of the common folk in them were either seriously injured or killed,” Tywin informed, making my heart sink a bit. To think a religious order had caused such suffering.
“I see. We ought to make sure their families are provided for at the very least, and given reassurances that the sparrows will be held responsible,” I muttered, hearing Tywin give a hum of approval beside me.
“I’ll have Varys see to that.”
“Perhaps I ought to go with him. It will appear more genuine that way. Plus, then I can inspect the site myself. The problem with Kings Landing is that it wasn't built with any particular layout, but if we can slowly rebuild with a more thought out design, then it would be able to more adequately house the smallfolk, and if there’s less overcrowding, that also means less ability for disease to spread. Sickness is bound to spread in large cities, but if we could limit the amount of families living in one house, that ought to help,” I reasoned, continually looking down at the sheet before me and trying to formulate some kind of design in my head based off of what I knew about Highgarden’s layout. Though, King’s Landing was admittedly a much different space.
“And how do you propose we go about building such a thing? To redesign and rebuild the entire city is quite a hefty task. It would displace many,” Tywin pointed out, though I shook my head in disagreement.
“Not if we do it slowly. We could also use the sept to house people, there aren’t any more nobles in need of a marriage that grand so far as I’m concerned. And as we carry it out, we could also hire the smallfolk to help build. It would improve our economy significantly and reduce the amount of unemployed and homeless, especially because the new layout would ideally use the space available most efficiently. I’m no architect or city planner, but I’m certain we could find somebody from the citadel who would be more than helpful with that matter. We ought to focus on agriculture as well, especially with the upcoming winter. It will remain relatively warm enough to plant certain crops, and it would certainly relieve a burden off of Highgarden. Plus, the more jobs available the better,” I rambled, thinking of the endless benefits that redesigning and rebuilding King’s Landing would have. If we could execute it correctly, which I was certain we could, it would be infinitely useful.
When Tywin said nothing, I looked over my shoulder at him. I had leaned over the table subconsciously, both hands spread on the map like I was planning for battle. My husband was smiling rather fondly, and I raised a curious eyebrow. What on earth was making him grin like such a fool?
“A few years ago, (Y/N), when I saw you for the first time since you were 14, I had not a clue what to expect. For a moment, I thought you had remained as immature as you were as a young girl, but you quickly proved me wrong. You had leaned over my table then, just as you are now, and told me that we would be stupid to go through that ravine, because if Stannis sent men in another direction and they realized we were coming, we would’ve been easy to repel. You were admittedly correct, and I understood that you were no longer an inexperienced child. Now you stand here, telling me exactly how we ought to earn the respect of the smallfolk and more than that, how it will be beneficial for all involved. You underestimate yourself, (Y/N), and of all my concerns, you being a good queen is not one of them. You have always been a leader, that won’t change just because the title sounds more intimidating,” Tywin explained, stepping toward me and cupping my face in his hands. My lips parted as I stared up at him, my heart somehow pounding in my chest at the sentiment he was expressing. There was something so indescribable about the way that Tywin managed to reassure me, and I often wondered how it was possible. 
I reached for the fabric of his robe, pulling him closer to me and lifting my head up to show him I wished for a kiss. He chuckled softly, moving his hands from my face and grabbing my hips instead. Tywin bent down, pressing his lips to mine with a noise of satisfaction.
“You’re far too good at that,” I whispered when he pulled away, making his eyebrow raise.
“What, kissing you?”
“No. Well, yes, that too. But I meant that you’re far too good at reassuring me. I’m always in my head and you always know how to pull me out,” I said with a smile, unable to look away from my husband for even a moment. Even after all this time I was still so smitten with him.
“It’s because you often do the same for me, even if you don’t realize it,” he remarked with a kiss to my forehead. 
“And speaking of, well, reassurances… the subject of succession, your succession, I mean… do you- are you still firm on the subject of children?” I asked, knowing that was one of the other things I needed to discuss with him.
“Yes, I am. Why? Has the prospect of them being a prince or princess changed your opinion on it?” He questioned in reply, a certain hesitation in his voice as he asked it, almost as if hoping that mentioning he hadn’t changed his mind wasn’t the wrong thing to say.
“No! Gods, no. I just- I wasn’t sure if… well I don’t know. Your relationship with Tyrion has certainly improved, but I didn’t have a clue if it had improved enough to make you give him the throne. You were already unsure about giving him Casterly Rock,” I pointed out, watching him nod as he listened to what I was saying. He was contemplative. 
“Casterly Rock must have prestige associated with it. Jaime is no ruler, but he would not make the Lannister name an embarrassment. To have Tyrion there, whoring and drinking constantly, would be a problem. The throne has no obligations, it is expected for kings to drink and whore. Tyrion will get the throne once I am gone, and I feel quite certain he will rule far better than most,” Tywin explained, one of his hands holding mine and the other on the table, gently tapping against the wood. He quite frequently fidgeted with his fingers, I realized. I wondered if somehow it helped him process his thoughts.
“I see. That’s easily settled then,” I remarked, somewhat glad it had been resolved so easily. I had expected a much longer conversation, but I was quite satisfied. Tyrion would be a good king.
“Yes, it is.”
I thought for a moment more, and then an insecurity from the previous night came back to me. I found myself looking down, not wanting to see Tywin’s reaction as I said what was on my mind.
“You’re correct, Tywin. Kings certainly are expected to whore, drink, and hunt,” I mumbled, feeling insanely uncomfortable with the jealousy I was experiencing. Surely every woman in the seven kingdoms would be throwing herself at him now. 
“(Y/N), a crown is not suddenly going to transform me. Just like any other man, I have been with whores, and I have enjoyed them, but you are my wife. I had no need to marry you, House Tyrell was already firmly tied to House Lannister. I married you because I love you, and that means I have no intentions of being unfaithful. I would hang any woman who tried to flirt with me, because I will not see our marriage insulted that way. Rest assured that you are the only woman I want, and that is not going to change just because they decided to put me on the throne,” Tywin assured me, hand coming under my chin and forcing me to look at him. He was entirely genuine, I could see it in his eyes. In all honesty, I knew everything he said was true before he had even bothered to open his mouth, but somehow hearing it outloud brought such relief. 
“I merely hate the thought of women looking at you with desire.”
“And now you understand how I feel. Perhaps you’ll stop teasing so much when I get possessive.”
I laughed then, shaking my head and embracing Tywin. There was always something so lovely about knowing I was the only person with whom he acted this way. His hands were on my hips again, and when he gave them a slight squeeze I knew exactly what he was about to say.
“And believe me, none of those whores are anything like you. It left me rather unsatisfied,” he whispered, which had initially been what I expected. Then I was given quite the surprise.
“Unsatisfied?” I questioned, wondering if he was insinuating what I thought he was. He observed me for a second, as though he were debating whether or not he ought to admit something.
“About two years ago, when you left to go make negotiations with Robb Stark, I sent a description to the brothel. At that point, I was unaware that you returned my feelings. We hadn’t even kissed yet, but you were driving me mad. It was impulsive of me to do, and I felt incredibly guilty afterwards… but I- well, I couldn’t even finish with her. From behind, she certainly looked similar. Your same height, hair color, skin tone… but she wasn’t anything like you. She did not hold herself with any confidence, the sound of her voice was wrong. She did not moan how you would’ve, and when I leaned down her scent was nothing like yours. That’s when I had to stop. I paid her and asked her to leave. She wasn’t you…” he said, revealing what was probably the most shocking thing I had ever heard him say. I was trying to process my feelings, but in all honesty I had no idea what to feel. How are you supposed to feel about learning that a man fucked a whore with you in mind? More than anything, I was just surprised. I hadn’t even considered that Tywin desired me at that point in time.
“Tywin…” I whispered, not sure what else to say. It was the only thing that would escape my throat. Should I be offended that he had done it? Should I be flattered? There certainly was something erotic about the idea that I had driven him so mad with lust he had gone so far as to find a whore that looked like me. But at the same time, I hated the idea of him fucking another woman. He was mine. Although, as he had said, that was exactly why he’d stopped. She wasn’t me.
“You had been in my room in the last day or two. We had discussed something, I don’t remember what, but you had sat on my bed. You’d been fidgeting with the lace on one of the pillows, I remember that much. You left your scent on it, and that night… when I realized…” he trailed off, and it seemed that just the memory of it had sparked lust in him. I swallowed, instantly understanding. Yes, I was decided. That was utterly erotic.
Suddenly I was picturing Tywin naked, laying in bed that night with a sort of disappointment that the whore had not fulfilled his desire for me. I imagined him turning over and suddenly inhaling a familiar scent. He would flare his nostrils a few times, discovering that something smelled just like me. He would check the pillows around him, and then he would find the one that I had left my perfume on. Tywin would proceed to inhale deeply, and the lust would spark in him again. He’d reach down, touching himself as the scent consumed him entirely and he shut his eyes.
I came back to the present after picturing that, and I felt the heat in my cheeks. To think of Tywin in such a context was entirely new, but I found that I liked it.
“Until that night, I hadn’t been with a whore since weeks before the Battle of Blackwater. Once I had spoken to you again, (Y/N), you became my only desire. You called me an insufferable cunt, fine, I would prove you otherwise. Nobody had ever dared to say such a thing, and what had piqued my interest was that I knew you did not mean it just to be insulting, it was genuinely what you thought of me. When I wasn’t working, I was thinking of you. And when those thoughts became different in their nature, I did what I thought would satisfy the urge. No. No, it most certainly did not. I couldn’t have anything less than you, I discovered. Nothing ever has and nothing ever will compare to you, (Y/N).”
I felt my heart pounding with his words, so overwhelming was the love inside of me. Suddenly I could not keep myself off of my husband. I instantly kissed him, grabbing at his hair and moaning into his mouth. He did the same in response, and every touch was so raw and genuine. He lifted me from the ground then, letting me wrap my legs around his waist as he took me over to the bed.
He sat me on the edge of the mattress, standing between my legs as his lips grasped at mine. Gods, it wasn’t even 9:00 yet and we were already like this. His hands had come to my thighs, and he had to pull away for a moment, absolutely breathless.
“(Y/N)… (Y/N)…” he muttered, pressing his forehead to mine. I cupped his cheeks, swallowing and catching my own breath.
“I love you, Tywin… I love you so much,” I whispered, smiling slightly and looking into his eyes. He also smiled softly, removing his hands from my thighs and embracing me instead. It seemed that we were both equally emotional and lust-filled. 
“I love you far more than I ought to, (Y/N). My queen… my Nightshade of the Garden… my wife,” he said softly, tucking some of my hair behind my ear. He kissed me again, softer this time. I responded the exact same way.
It was an interesting thought, that I truly had no idea what would come next for us. I found that I did not care, for it did not matter. Tywin and I would continue on, just as we always did.
—————
“You look very handsome, your grace. The sash fits well.”
“It’s not your grace just yet, Cerella. And he does look handsome, even if perhaps a bit gloomy.”
I was fixing up Tywin’s outfit for the coronation, and he had decided on his black coat with the lions on the shoulders. On top of that, I had fixed a golden sash around his torso, as I was trying to prevent him from looking too plain. 
“I do not appreciate your jokes,” Tywin mumbled, which only made me smile even more as I adjusted his belt. He was simply so easy to tease.
“Have you ever considered taking the black, husband? I feel confident they would allow you to keep your wardrobe,” I jested further, finally stepping away from him and feeling satisfied with his appearance. Cerella had brought in my own dress and was presently waiting for me to strip out of my nightgown. 
“Ha! If I did, it would leave you begging,” he replied snarkily, only continuing to grin when I smacked his arm. 
“Do you hear him, Cerella? My husband is surely the most insufferable cunt in all seven kingdoms,” I scoffed, undoing some of the lace on my nightgown and pulling it over my head. My undergarments had followed, of course, and Tywin had pretended not to notice my nudity as he ran a hand over his hair in the mirror. 
“Here, my lady,” Cerella replied, handing me a fresh set to put on. She had not addressed my claim, but was smiling in a way that told me she appreciated the joke. I supposed that after serving the two of us for so long, she’d been forced to become accustomed to our constant teasing and yapping.
I pulled on the clean undergarments, and I held still as she assisted me with the lacing of my stay. After that came my gown, of course, which was a deep scarlet red. The top had minimal gold and white detail, for on top of my dress I was wearing a beautiful porcelain corset. It had absolute gorgeous ornamentation, with perfected gold detailing along the edges and roses painted on it. It had been a gift for my 24th name day, and I hadn’t found an occasion for it until now.
“You look absolutely stunning, my lady,” Cerella said as she helped me put it on. I smiled at her for a moment, and then I smiled at my reflection in the mirror. It certainly was quite the sight. Cerella had done my hair beforehand too, wanting to make sure that everything would stay in place. 
“Yes, she does. You’re breathtaking, wife,” Tywin noted, coming up behind me and placing his hands on my hips, just below the corset. I hadn’t even realized he was watching, in all honesty.
“Well, my husband is being made into the king of all seven kingdoms today. If that isn’t a good occasion to be wearing this, I don’t know what is,” I remarked, watching Cerella step back and take my dirty nightclothes out. Tywin and I were left alone after a moment.
“I have something to give you, (Y/N). I’m not certain what jewelry you were planning to wear, but I think you ought to consider this.”
I watched him retrieve a flat, square box from his dresser with a small smirk on his face. I was suspicious of him, just as I always was. Tywin brought it over to me, and I turned to face him with a raised eyebrow. Carefully, he opened the case and revealed an absolutely stunning necklace. It made me gape, and I quite honestly had no clue what to say in reply.
“What do you think?” he questioned, lifting his gaze from the jewelry up to me. I managed to avert my eyes too, though with quite some difficulty.
“It’s gorgeous, Tywin. Would you- would you help me put it on?” I asked softly, watching the satisfaction settle in his eyes. He said nothing, but nodded and motioned for me to turn around. I did so, watching him move around in the mirror and remove the necklace from its case. I adjusted my hair as he came up behind me, and I could feel his breath against my ear as he hung the thing from my neck. I felt the gentle clasp of it, and he carefully removed his hands. For such a gorgeous, detailed necklace, it was not nearly as heavy as I had suspected. I put my hair back in place with a sort of entrancement.
“It looks beautiful on you,” Tywin said after a moment, still standing right behind me and admiring my reflection. Carefully, he wrapped his arms around my waist and let his head lean against mine. 
“I think this would look beautiful on anyone, Tywin. Maybe even on you,” I jested, though there was no humor in my voice. Something about seeing myself this way was shocking, and I could not tear my eyes away. I looked like a queen.
“No, I doubt that. I had it specifically made for you, the measurements are specific. You are the only woman who’s ever been meant to wear it,” he said, his voice low and clear. I placed my hands on top of his, swallowing and then letting my lips part with a sort of overwhelmed feeling.
“I wonder, Tywin, if you will ever stop spoiling me like a child,” I remarked, finally looking at him. As well as I could, anyways, for our faces were rather close. 
“I have never spoiled you like a child. I have spoiled you like a wife—as you deserve,” he replied, placing a chaste kiss against my neck. I leaned into him, a sort of warmth filling me. To think this man had been my worst enemy a few years ago was incredibly odd, for now he was the most important person in my life. To think that a cut, a sword, and a set of armor might’ve changed my life forever.
There was a knock at our door which I recognized as Cerella’s, and I knew it must be time for us to leave. I moved myself from Tywin’s grasp, though I took his arm once I had. From there, we made our way out of the tower of the hand and down to the throne room. The walk was quiet, but the entire time Tywin kept me close. Occasionally, he would look over at me and hold my gaze for a few moments before looking away. I wondered if perhaps he was trying to make sure I was still there, as stupid as that sounded. 
When we reached the double doors, I felt him take a deep breath and noticed his gaze set firmly on the wood in front of us. I pressed my lips together, blinking a few times as I debated whether or not I should ask him how he was doing. I decided it would do little harm.
“Are you alright, Tywin?”
“Of course.”
It was kurt, and perhaps a bit sharper than he had intended. He was stressed, I understood. He was not easily made this way, either, and I felt awful. The man standing beside me was not only Tywin, he was the king. In this moment, the second identity had to be worn.
“I did not mean to use such a tone,” he said after a minute or so, finally looking at me. There was the husband again. 
“It’s alright, Tywin. You don’t need to apologize. Not today,” I whispered, giving him a sympathetic look. A sort of relief settled in his face, as though he was at least glad I was not upset by what he had said. I had learned Tywin well enough to know it was not truly him.
Slowly, the double doors were pulled open and the two of us were shown to the entire court. My heart skipped a beat, as if I was suddenly processing that we both were on public display. With a swallow, I stepped forward in sync with Tywin, looking straight ahead in spite of my nerves and desire to observe every face. Margaery would inform me of looks afterwards, I was certain.
There was a silence in the room as Tywin and I walked through the isle, heading straight up to the throne. It was almost like a moment of peace, a moment of time that nobody else existed in. I found that I could not resist the urge to look at Tywin, and even despite his appearance as king today, he looked back at me. Oh, and those eyes. Those blue, blue eyes with their green flecks. I loved this man so much.
We reached the platform then, and together we ascended up the steps. I made eye contact with Kevan, who Tywin had chosen as Hand of the King, for he never wanted politics to cause strife in our marriage. Although, both of us were aware that I would continue to be his most trusted source of guidance and advice. And, it was a good thing Kevan was hand too, for I did not want to relinquish our chambers in the tower and he had no problem whatsoever taking the kings instead. The bed was bigger in there, but Tywin and I had no problem sleeping close together.
It was Kevan who I had expected to stand beside at the ceremony, too, but Tywin did not drop his arm. With an open mouth, I found myself standing in front of the throne with him, and there was a smug look on his face.
“Let them see that the queen has every bit of power that the king does. Your title is owed a crown,” he whispered before we turned around to look upon the crowd. I was still somewhat shocked, but I did not let it show as we faced everyone. 
Tywin’s arm detached from mine then, but he then opted to grab my hand instead. He was certainly full of surprises today, and I could not keep myself from giving a subtle smile when his hand squeezed mine.
The high septon was behind us, and once Tywin and I had settled in, he began with the ceremonials. I—in all honesty—was not listening to what he was saying whatsoever. Tywin had been running his thumb up and down the side of my hand for the last several minutes, and that was all I could focus on. That and the two crowns I had noticed in the corner of my eye. One was much larger, and had the face of a lion upon it. The other was about the size of my head, and was covered in thorns and roses. 
The high septon had been going on about the seven blessing and guiding Tywin for at least 10 minutes now, and I hadn’t really processed what was being said until I was mentioned. It was not something that had ever been said in a coronation before, at least as far as I was concerned, and Tywin had given me the most fulfilled of looks when he’d heard it. 
“And may his lady wife support him in all his endeavors and be a pillar of strength in the crown. May she show love, compassion, and kindness to all in the kingdoms, and lead just as bravely as the man beside her. The Queen (Y/N) Tyrell, long may she reign,” he said, placing the golden crown of roses atop my head. Its weight was pleasant, and the echo of ‘long may she reign’ from everyone in the hall sent a slight shiver up my spine. Tywin squeezed my hand once more.
After that, the High Septon moved on to Tywin, and I was unable to remove my eyes from my husband. He looked every bit the king, standing tall with his perfect posture and elegant coat. The High Septon held the crown above his head, and with a shout of ‘long may he reign,’ it was placed upon his head.
“Long may he reign,” I repeated with the rest of the crowd, smiling at the sight of the golden lion upon Tywin’s white hair. It matched the blonde strands that remained on the edges of his head and his cheeks. 
Loud applause filled the room for King Tywin, first of his name, and I experienced the sort of feeling that one gets before battle. The feeling of rallying your men, of hearing them cheer as they prepare to die for you. Would these men fight for my husband? Would they die for him? I would. 
Tywin looked over at me then, and when our eyes met I knew everything would be alright, somehow. There were trials to come, I knew, but it was impossible to feel frightened when the man beside me was looking at me the way he was. Tywin and I had faced everything together for the last few years, and I had no doubt in my mind that we would continue to do so now.
“My Queen,” Tywin muttered, lifting our hands and kissing the back of mine. It was as if he had forgotten everyone in the hall was there, even as their applause continued to ring in our ears. I smiled even more now, looking up at my husband with utter adoration. Every choice I’d made in my life had been the right one, for I could not imagine living without this man. The Great Lion of the Rock and the Nightshade of the Garden. 
Tywin Lannister, I could say confidently, was the most important thing in my life. The man I trusted, guided, received guidance from. But most importantly he was the man I loved. They said that Westeros had not seen a match such as ours in centuries, if ever. And standing beside Tywin in front of the throne, his hand in mine and our eyes stuck on each other, I had the odd sensation that they never would again. For how could they?
I could not imagine another tale such as ours, with the hatred of him in my youth turning to eventual friendship in my adulthood, and then that friendship eventually turning to love. Tywin and I had fought wars together, settled conflict together, and kept all seven kingdoms intact together. What other couple could boast that? None. None could. There were no couples like us. There were no people like us. There was only us.
My thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of Tywin’s hand at my waist, and I realized that he was pulling me towards him. Before all present in the hall, he kissed me. Tywin was passionate, and yet simultaneously loving. I could not resist the urge to smile as I kissed back, the sensation of his familiar lips causing a wave of utter contentment to wash over me. A sense of peace. When Tywin pulled away, he smiled at me. It wasn’t even a small smile, it was genuine and raw. And I could see in his eyes, it was not the crown atop his head that had made him smile. It had been me, standing right beside him as the High Septon had placed it atop his head. I kissed him once more, with not a single care as I did so.
For they would never see our like again.
TAGLIST:
@cheyxfu @lemonscoffee @groovy-lady 
@ladysindar @vesta-ro @exo-nova @paola-carter
@prettykinkysoul 
@fullmoonshadowwrites @kishie8 
@the-desilittle-bird @dianilaws @girlonfireice 
@muscari-fae @lostgirllulu 
@abigfanofgameofthrones @smalltownbigheart 
@frombloodandflesh @supernaturalismyreligion666
@thanyatargaryen @rey26 @hexandale @pkawaiidesu5394 @aimsro
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Text
You Know Why
Pairing: Nick “Goose” Bradshaw x Female Reader.
Summary: You’re a sexy sweetheart with a past and a toxic boyfriend. Goose sees that and wants better for you. Why? You know why. ❤️
Warnings: Fluff, romantic, hurt/comfort, reader has jerk boyfriend, toxic relationship, some curse words, punching, Goose becoming “Mr. Steal Your Girl”. ;)
Word Count: 4,787
A/N: I couldn’t come up with a name I liked for Reader’s boyfriend in this so he’s just “Boyfriend” LOL. The word “Squid” used in this story is a common nickname for Navy sailors, usually intended as a mild insult. This idea comes from the 150 Random Writing Prompts list by @writinginstardust​.
“Don’t go on that date.” “Why?” “You know why.” “Say it.”
“Blue Hawaii” and “Can’t Help Falling In Love” by Elvis Presley. 🎵
I really like this one. 😍  I hope you enjoy! :)
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Lieutenant JG Nick "Goose" Bradshaw thought he always knew what his type of girl was. He wanted one that shared his sense of humor and values. Someone who didn't mind his silly antics with his best friend and someone who could understand how important his service to the Navy was to him. Someone he could feel comfortable with introducing to his mother. He let his friend, Maverick, chase the hot-to-trot bombshells. As nice as they were to look at, Goose knew he didn't want the hassle and drama those types inevitably came with. Or at least that's what he thought until he met you.
You worked at a little hole in the wall BBQ restaurant near the docks. The wall decor was tacky and the air always had the lingering scent of cigarette smoke. None of that mattered to Goose. The pulled pork sandwich was to die for and best of all, the restaurant had an old upright piano in the corner open for anyone to play. At least that's what he told himself on the reasons why he kept coming back. You were leggy and buxom. A "body built for sin", as they say, or even for the pages of a girlie magazine, as it was rumored you had once posed nude in one.
"I'm telling ya, man! I've seen her in there as Miss March, like, a year ago." Wolfman once told Goose during a round of locker room talk.
 "Yeah, you say that but you fail to come up with the evidence." Hollywood chimed in, laughing, while Wolfman claimed he no longer had the magazine to prove it.
 "Mother Goose got the hots for a centerfold?" joked Slider.
 "She's not a centerfold." Goose flatly stated despite not being quite sure of himself. He didn't know why he suddenly couldn't come up with one of his quick quips. "She's not..."
 As if reading his friend's mind Maverick spoke up.
"Hey, so what if she is?" He said to no one in particular.
"Like any of you horn dogs really care?"
Maverick turned and smiled and nodded at Goose who returned the nod. The conversation went in another direction and all was quickly forgotten. Except Goose didn't forget. He couldn't stop thinking about you.
Your story was that you had moved out to California from some small town in the Midwest. Like many girls before you, the bright lights of Hollywood had attracted you and your ambition was to make it as an actress or a model. Needless to say, your Tinseltown dreams never panned out. Not wanting to go back home but no longer able to afford L.A., you relocated south to much more laid back San Diego.
It really didn't matter to Goose whether or not you'd been a centerfold or whatever else was in your past. That was the least of it. His real problem was with that goddamn boyfriend of yours.
...
Goose sat on the piano bench in the restaurant, messing around on the keys, lazily playing whatever song came to his mind. It was early on a Friday night and the place seemed deserted at the time. It was only him, the bartender, and one other patron who looked half asleep at the bar. 
Goose hummed a few notes. From where he sat, he could see the small parking lot. He saw you sitting in the passenger seat of your boyfriend's Trans AM. Even from the distance, Goose could feel the tension. Your arms were folded across your chest, your face turned away from the guy in the driver's seat. The RIO watched your boyfriend's lips move. He was yelling at you, that was for sure. It made Goose shift uncomfortably. He didn't like it when any man raised his voice at a woman. You turned and said something back to your boyfriend, your face did not look happy. You turned again and made an attempt to exit the car, when the guy grabbed your arm. Goose felt ready to jump up to your defense but you quickly shook your boyfriend off and got out of the car in a huff. You slammed the passenger door so hard it rattled the car windows. Your boyfriend peeled out moments later.
You opened the door and stomped inside. You were so fired up you didn't even notice Goose sitting there at the piano until he casually said:
"Trouble in paradise?"
You froze and looked at Goose. He was in jeans with a T-shirt and a blue Hawaiian shirt.
He kept his eyes on the piano keys.
"Goose." You said. Just seeing him made you calm down a bit.
You walked over to the piano and stood next to him.
"Where's your partner in crime?" You asked.
Goose smiled and glanced at you over the bridge of his aviators.
"Mav? Oh, I imagine by now he's probably shacked up with some lady he picked up at the O club."
Goose paused and quickly added: "I mean, he had a date. Yeah, that's it. A date."
You chuckled as he winked and hit some keys trying his best to imitate the sound of a comedic rim shot.
"Have a seat, honey." He offered, nodding to the bench.
You had some time before your shift started. You slid your purse strap off your shoulder and rested it on top of the piano as you took a seat next to Goose.
"Everything OK, Y/N?" Goose asked, cautiously. He made it no secret he was not fond of your boyfriend at all.
You nodded and said: "Yes. I'm fine, Nick. Thanks."
He didn't press and you didn't offer anymore.
You reached out and touched a few keys.
"I never learned to play an instrument." You told him, changing the subject.
"It was just never a thing in my house. Growing up."
That was another thing. You didn't like to talk about your family.
He had been struggling all night to figure out what to play. "Great Balls of Fire" was his favorite song but sometimes he felt like switching it up.
Wanting to lighten the mood, an idea popped into his head and he started playing.
"Night and you/And Blue Hawaii/The night is heavenly..."
He turned and and smiled at you and continued singing:
"And you are heaven to me."
You felt your heart flutter and your cheeks blush.
"That's my favorite Elvis movie. Blue Hawaii." You mentioned.
"Yeah? It was on TV in the rec room last night." Goose said.
"I've always wanted to go there." There was a wistful tone to your voice.
"To Miramar's rec room?" Goose suggested. "It's nothing special. Let me tell ya."
You laugh. "No, you dork! I meant Hawaii."
Goose smiled and kept playing.
"You mean you've never been?!" Goose asked like it was impossible.
"Well, we should go! And WHO are you calling a DORK, missy?!"
You laughed and shook your head at his silliness but he went on.
"No, seriously, let's go, Y/N. It's beautiful! You'll love it! We'll go to Pearl Harbor first. Gotta pay our respects."
You giggle. "Of course, Goose."
"That's right! And then we'll do all the touristy shit, ya know? Like, we'll go to Waikiki Beach. It's crowded as all get out but don't worry we can still have fun. We can go swimming or surfing or snorkeling. Whatever you want, babe."
Goose winked at you as he continued to tickle the ivories. You couldn't help but smile. The man always knew how to make you smile.
"We'll go to a luau," Goose said. "Eat some pig that's been in the ground for half a day. Drink as many of those fruity drinks you like."
Playing along, you joke:
"Yeah and maybe if we're lucky we'll both get... Lei-ed."
Goose stopped playing and let out one of his loud, wild, and infectious laughs.
"Oh, baby!" He cackled. "At this point, I'd settle for a hula girl shaking her grass skirt in my face. But yes, ma'am!" He drawled.
"I always appreciate a nice lei." He gave you a knowing look over his sunglasses.
"You and me both, Navy man." You winked.
"Great Balls of Fire!" Goose quickly slid his hand back and forth across the keys so it made a range of notes.
You both loved the way you flirted with one another. Not so much in an overt sexually charged way but in a more tongue-in-cheek way.
"You're sweet, Goose. But I know it's all just a pipe dream." You sigh.
"Why do you say that?" He asks, softly, eyes still on the keys.
A beat of silence passes between the two of you.
"You know why." You replied.
"It doesn't have to be that way, Y/N." Goose replied.
Something about the way he spoke and the soft melody he was now playing made your heart feel like it was melting.
Changing the subject, you glanced at your watch and said you better get going but he gently touched your arm, stopping you.
"Wait," Goose said. "C'mere. I wanna show you something."
He patted his lap.
You raise an eyebrow. "What?"
"C'mere," Goose repeated, smiling. "This won't take long, I swear."
He pushes the bench back a little bit so you could stand up and sit on his lap.
You shoot him a quizzical look as you settled yourself on his lap. You feel butterflies dance in your stomach as he pulls you closer and his arms cover yours.
"This will be your first piano lesson." Goose tells you.
You laughed and turn to look back at him. "What?! Are you serious?"
"Don't worry, honey, it will be a freebie lesson. After that, I'm afraid I'll have to start charging. A guy's gotta eat, ya know?"
You can't help but giggle as Goose reminds you that you had just mentioned how you always wanted to learn an instrument.
"Yeah, but not right now!" You exclaimed.
"Oh, hush," Goose replied. "You're being a very difficult student to work with, young lady."
He turns you back so you are facing the piano. He places your fingers on the keys and rests his hands on top of yours.
He leans his head over your right shoulder and guides you on which keys to play. You can feel his breath hot in your ear.
The notes you make don't sound nearly as good as when Goose plays.
"That's all right, darlin,'" He coaxed. "It's a little awkward your first time but you practice enough and it will come more naturally."
He really didn't intend that as innuendo but you both catch it and chuckle.
Goose worked the pedal below while you kept trying the keys he taught.
"I'm no good at this," You comment.
"Here, let me show you."
Goose takes your hands off the keys but makes no indication that he wants you to get up so you stayed seated in his lap.
His arms flanked around yours and he shifted his body to scoot closer to the piano and you could feel his chest flush against your back. You caught a faint whiff of his woodsy cologne.
He started to play but he wasn't playing the same thing as before.
Gradually, you recognized the tune and it all started to click.
"Wise men say/Only fools rush in/But I can't help/Falling in love with you."
Goose sang softly in your ear.
You didn't realize you were holding your breath until you let out a sigh.
Sitting there in Goose's lap with his arms around you, the warmth of his body heat, his smooth singing voice serenading you, it felt so good. You felt warm, safe, and loved. Things you hadn't felt from anybody in a long time.
As Goose continued to sing, you closed your eyes and surrendered to the moment. Soon he was slowly rocking you side to side to the music. His face was so close to yours, you could feel his mustache brush against your skin.
"Take my hand/Take my whole life, too/For I can't help/Falling in love with you."
Goose finished singing and you both sat very still for a moment. Slowly, you twisted around to face him. He lifted his aviators up and rested them on top of his head. Your noses were practically touching. You were both staring at each other's lips. You both were breathing heavily.
You both wanted to say something but couldn't. You felt your bottom lip tremble but whether it was from anxiety or anticipation, you weren't sure.
Goose reached up and pressed his thumb to your lips and brushed it back and forth. Just when you felt like you couldn't stand it any longer, he leaned in and your eyes closed anticipating his kiss.
"Hey, Bradshaw!"
The voice of the restaurant manager made the two of you jump. It gave you such a jolt of surprise that you accidentally tipped backwards, catching yourself on the piano keys, resulting in a medley of sour notes. Goose reached out and helped you steady yourself.
"Are you gonna turn my waitress loose any time this year?"
The manager joked. He was a friendly, middle aged man.
"Dinner crowd's gonna be coming in shortly." He explained, his head sticking out from the kitchen door.
You watched as a range of emotions crossed Goose's face as he tried to pull himself together. He also had got lost in the moment before and had forgotten where he was. It was such an easy thing to do for both of you when you spent time together. He swore under his breath.
"Uh, yeah!" Goose called out your boss. "Sure thing, man! She's all yours."
Goose reluctantly released you. The piano bench made a scraping noise across the title as he pushed away from the instrument to allow you to stand up.
You gathered your purse and turned back to Goose. He remained seated on the bench, looking up at you with wide brown eyes.
"Thanks for the piano lesson, Goose," You tell him. "I gotta get to work now. See you around."
"Y/N, wait."
You shake your head no and started to move away as he stood up.
"No. I'm sorry, Nick."
Was it your imagination or did your voice just crack when you said his real name? It must have because you noticed the change in Goose's face. His brown eyes, reflecting concern. You both knew you only called him by his real name when you were being serious.
"I'll come back." Goose said. "Later. Tonight. When you're off."
You sigh. "That...That wouldn't be a very good idea. "
Goose inhaled and exhaled a very audible sigh of frustration.
"Your boyfriend? Is he coming back?"
You nodded.
"Look, I just don't want there to be any trouble..."
"Trouble?!" Goose repeated. He motioned to himself, trying to lighten the mood.
"C'mon. Do I honestly look like trouble?"
There was a beat and he added:
"OK, so I DO look like trouble but that's only when I'm with Maverick. He's a bad influence on me. Other than that I'm an angel, baby, I swear." He made a show of crossing his heart.
"Yes," You chuckle. "Yes, you are, Goose."
Damn this man, you thought. Damn this irresistibly charming, handsome and heartwarming man.
"Go to work, honey," Goose said. "I'll come back. "
...
Shit. Goose thought. The chance was right there and if it hadn't been for the worst timing in the world from your manager, you two would have kissed. One thing was made crystal clear: you felt the same way he did.
Goose never thought of himself as the type that would deliberately swipe another guy's girl. Tonight that was going to change. His reasons were valid. He was coming back and he didn't care if it started "trouble" or not. He wasn't afraid of your boyfriend and you shouldn't be either. You deserved better and he was going to give it to you. He was going to make you his.
All throughout your shift you couldn't get your mind off of Goose and the almost kiss you had with him at the piano. You kept replaying the scene over and over in your head. Oh God, how much you wanted him. And he wanted you, too. You told him not to come back but you hoped he wouldn't listen.
Please come back, Goosey. Baby, please.
You clocked out and when you walked out into the dining room, you felt your heart soar like a F-14 launched off the catapult.
Goose was waiting for you.
"Hey," He said, smiling. "I'm back."
"I see that." You said.
You wanted to run to him. You wanted to jump in his arms and plant kisses all over his pretty face but you restrained yourself.
He offered you his arm.
"C'mere. Walk with me awhile."
You walked together down to the pier. The night had a warm, balmy breeze. You both stopped along side the railing looking out at the twinkling lights of the passing boats.
"He's coming back to pick me up." You blurted, referring to your boyfriend.  You were looking to break the awkward silence. You turned to face Goose.
"He's taking me on a date," You explain.
Goose only nodded and listened to you explain how your boyfriend had been asking you to move in with him. He had been starting to get very adamant it and it was causing problems, among other things.
"Does he hit you?" Goose asked, carefully.
You shook your head no.
"Don't lie to me, Y/N. You can tell me. You know that."
"I would never lie to you, Goose. You know that."
Goose nodded.
"I know you wouldn't, baby."
There was something about the way he said that. It was so firm yet so warm and gentle. You felt your eyes well up with tears. You managed to kept them at bay.
"Look, Y/N," Goose started. You wondered if you were finally going to discuss what almost happened at the piano earlier.
"Do me a favor." Goose stated, taking your hands in his.
He hesitated before looking you square in the eyes.
"Don't go on that date."
You stood there for a moment, holding hands and eye contact.
You felt your bottom lip tremble again.
"Why?" It was all you could manage to squeak out.
"You know why."
Goose reached up and brushed his thumb across your lip.
You couldn't take it anymore.
"Say it."
To your surprise, Goose shook his head no.
"Say it," You demand. "Say it, Nick! Say it!"
Goose kept shaking his head.
"No, honey. I'm done talking."
Before you knew it, his lips were on yours. You immediately surrendered to his embrace. Your hands were moving all over each other. He pulled you as flush as he could to his body. You let your hands slide up his sides, over his neck and into his hair. You had wondered before what kind of kisser he would be. He did not disappoint. His tongue danced with yours over and over in the most tender and loving way. A moan escaped from your mouth and Goose squeezed you tighter.
Goose reluctantly released you when it became necessary to breathe again.
Your eyes fluttered open. You both were panting steadily.
"Oh, Goosey," You whispered.
You hugged him again, pressing your face into his chest. You felt his arms wrap around you, feeling like a cozy blanket .
"Talk to me, honey," He soothed. "What is it?"
"I've made so many mistakes in my past." You told him. "I'm not proud of the things I've done."
Just thinking about your life back in L.A. made you want to cringe.
You looked at the gold cross that he wore on a short chain around his neck next to his dog tags. You reached up and rubbed the pendant between your fingers.
"I used to go church," You said, not sure why you were telling him this. "I used to be a good girl. Once upon a time. You're such a good man. You should get yourself a nice church girl, Goose. A good girl."
Goose cupped your chin and tilted your head to make you look up at him.
"I don't need to do that. I already got a good girl."
You were both smiling when he leaned down and kissed you again. He wanted to communicate through the kiss. He wanted you to know nobody was perfect, everybody has made mistakes, it didn't matter what your past was, the time was now and that's all that mattered.
The kiss was abruptly interrupted when a booming voice from behind said your name.
"Y/N?! What the HELL is going on?!"
You froze stiff. Goose immediately pulled you off to his side, moving in a defensive position in front of you. His protective mode had been activated.
There was your boyfriend, standing there just a few feet away.
He was shooting daggers at you with his eyes.
"I've been looking all over for you. Your boss said you left thirty minutes ago?!"
His glare found Goose.
"And who the fuck is this clown?!" He was looking at the aviator but speaking to you.
You felt your stomach knot with fear. You didn't want there to be a scene. You didn't want anyone to get hurt.
"No, no, no, pal," Goose answered, waving his index finger, voice dripping with sarcasm. "There's only one Bozo around here and it ain't me."
Your boyfriend put his hands on his hips and squinted his eyes.
"Oh, a real funny guy, huh? We'll see what's funny when I knock that shit-eating grin off your face."
You clutched Goose's arm. He looked back at you and touched your hand, reassuring you it was OK.
Turning back, Goose could only find amusement in the situation. Guys like your boyfriend were a dime a dozen. Their bark was always worse than their bite.
"Y/N, I asked YOU a question." Your boyfriend spat.
"He's my friend," You simply said.
Your boyfriend moved closer. Spotting Goose's dog tags, he scoffed.
"He’s one of those squids, huh? I should have known. Boy, you'd really screw anyone, won't you? All right, you had your fun. Come on. Let's go."
He had the audacity to stick out his hand, expecting you to take it.
You shook your head.
"No."
Your boyfriend's eyes widened with disbelief.
"What?!" He was not accustomed to being denied.
"No," You repeated, much louder. "I said no!"
Goose felt his heart swell with pride at your new found confidence.
Your boyfriend let his arm drop. He threw up his arms in frustration.
"I can't believe this bullshit!"
"Believe it, brother," Goose gloated. "You heard the lady. She doesn't want you anymore."
"Hey, asshole, " Your boyfriend pointed his finger at Goose. "Nobody is talking to you!"
"Yeah, well, I AM talking to you," Goose quipped. There was an edge to his voice he didn't use very often but he still maintained his composure.
He knew nothing made a pissed off person more angry than someone who wouldn't take the bait.
"She doesn't want you here. I don't want you here. That gives you one option: Go away and don't come around ever again."
Your boyfriend edged closer. To your surprise, Goose did the same.
With the two men standing in front of each other, you noticed how Goose was taller than your boyfriend. Goose had his shoulders squared and his chest was puffed out like a peacock. He wasn't exactly a super buff guy but he did have a decent build.
You watched in awe at the display in front of you. You never had two guys fighting over you before.
"Oh, yeah?" Your boyfriend whined, peering up at Goose. "What are you gonna do about it if I don't, hot shot?!"
Goose grinned so wickedly it was almost a little unnerving. He started chuckling. "What am I gonna do?! What am I gonna do?! " He mocked.
He began cracking up.
He turned around to you and called out: "Hey, Y/N! Your boyfriend here wants to  know what I'm gonna do!"
You thought maybe Goose suddenly lost his marbles and your boyfriend looked just as perplexed.
Just as quickly as he started, Goose stopped laughing, turned back and violently snatched your boyfriend by his shirt collar, catching him completely off guard, lifting him off the ground. The action made your boyfriend yelp and you audibly gasp.
"Fuck around and find out." Goose told him, very matter-of-factly.
He released your boyfriend without warning and the man stumbled upon impact with the ground.
He looked visibly shaken up. You suddenly laughed. Mostly at yourself at why you let him bully you for so long. You walked over and defiantly linked arms with Goose.
Your boyfriend's panicked eyes flickered back and forth between you and Goose. You both waited to see what he would do next.
Nostrils flaring, he yelled: "Fine! Fuck it! You can have her, man. I was about done with her ass anyway." He told Goose.
He shot one more glare at you. "Fuck you, bitch!"
The last thing he saw was Goose's fist coming toward his face. It connected with his nose so hard it sent him flying backwards. He fell flat on his back on the pier, knocked out cold.
You gasped and turned to Goose. He was groaning, flexing his hand, rubbing his knuckles, trying to relieve the pain.
"I hate it when it does that!" He said, humorously, as if his hand had a mind of it’s own.
"I don't take it very well when somebody talks to my girlfriend like that."
You looked from your new boyfriend to your now ex-boyfriend laying splayed out.
 "Is he going to be all right?"
Goose shrugged.
"I suppose so. Don't worry. He's still breathing. He'll walk it off. C'mon, let me take you home."
...
You walked back to the restaurant parking lot with your arms wrapped around each other's waist.
"I didn't know you could fight like that." You said, curiously.
"Yeah, I used to box a little bit while I was in Annapolis." Goose explained.
"I gave it up because I didn't want to screw up my hands. I like playing the piano more than boxing. It's good to know I still got it, though!"
You give him a sultry glance.
"I got to admit it was pretty hot." You give him a nudge.
Goose laughed and made a playful growl in your ear which made you giggle.
"That get your motor going, baby? I'll have to remember that."
"You're a little bit of a lover and a fighter, huh?"
"Yes, ma'am!"
As you reached the parking lot, there was one burning question still on his mind.
"Can I ask you a really, really random question?"
"Shoot." You reply.
"You used to do some modeling, right? Back in L.A.?"
"Yes?"
You both stop walking when you reach Goose's car.
He chuckled nervously while he scratched the back of his head.
"So were you ever in a magazine? By any chance?"
You laughed and regard him curiously. You folded your arms across your chest and gave him a pointed look.
"What kind of magazine are we talking about?"
" Hehehe... " He chuckled. He wonders if he's going to regret this but he just has to know.
"You know," He said. "A girlie magazine?"
Your mouth opens in surprise but you're not upset. It was actually quite funny.
You pretend to be flattered. You clasped your hands over your heart and bat your eyelashes.
"Oh, Goosey." You fake some sniffles. "It's so sweet of you to say that! That's always been a dream of mine ever since I was a little girl. To be the centerfold in a girlie magazine."
You then burst out with laughter.
"No, I was never in anything like that! Where on earth did you get an idea like that?!"
Goose was cackling with you.
"I'm sorry, honey! I honestly don't know where that idea came from."
I knew those idiots in the Miramar locker room were full of shit! Goose thought.
This time you took the lead and kissed him.
"I love you, Goose."
"I love you more, honey."
He held you in his arms not wanting to ever let you go.
"You know, Y/N," Goose started.
"I happen to have a really great Polaroid camera." His voice had a hint of mischief in it.
You smiled, slyly.
"That's nice. Any particular reason why you're telling me this, Goose?"
He shook his head.
"Nope! No reason at all! I just thought you'd be interested in that little tid-bit."
"Uh-huh." You clicked.
Goose opened the passenger door for you. Before you slid inside the car, you told him that he could show his camera to you "on the trip".
"What trip?" Goose asked.
You smiled. "Our trip to Hawaii, of course."
Goose laughed.
"Great Balls of Fire!"
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astralartefact · 2 months
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NieR Reincarnation The People and the World Satellite Spoilers, Feelings and a lot of YoRHa:Dark Apocalypse
Please read this post imagining silent sobbing in the background...
First off, I liked what they did with 10H, just skipping a recap entirely and making her Mama's ally right from the outset while leaving the in-between after the story we already knew for the EX Story.
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speaking of which, I loved that they gave that ex story a straightforward happy ending (also, the carnation for reincarnation is just... so cute) I was so afraid that it was going to end with Mama betraying her again, but she didn't q___q And it makes Mama calling her 'our special girl' before the chapter hit so much harder q___q I love you Mama q___q
(also, food for thought, her ex story's name 'copied floral silhouette'... silhouettes are black on white, so it implicates a copied black flower)
I was thinking what the fuck they were going to do with her RoD story in the distant future though... but alas, I only opened Twitter after doing all of that.
So let's talk about it, I didn't expect it to EoS in APRIL. WHAT THE FUCK THAT'S SO SOON!! And I wasn't even expecting them to do another Season or anything, the story is in a perfect place to stop, all I was expecting them to do was drag it out a little bit longer with a skeleton crew only releasing RoDs and Costumes for a year or so until they didn't feel like it anymore - but this soon??? I guess the next NieR game must be closer than I initially thought, why would they just end it, surely they could have kept up the servers for a few more months with how much money and time they've put into the character models and stuff...
I do hope a Offline Version is coming, mainly so I can finally unironically call it the best NieR game without the looming "But it's a Gacha" threating my credibility as a... I don't have credibility, why am I even worried about that
Needless to say, my dream of #AnoggForReincarnation is probably dead in the water... But we'll get to her, because I have thoughts.
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Two Big things from the Chapter that I want to talk about:
No.1: It's revealed that Humanity had a plan to "return" (to Reincarnate, if you will) after their Extinction
No.2: The "Earth" we return to is just the Cage again, but whiter and snowier.
I have two theories for what the "Earth" we saw might have been:
a) It's a sort of Meta-Earth where every structure represents every possible parallel Earth in existence - like how we have a Drakengard Earth that's seperate from the Main NieR Earth that's seperate from Hina and Yuzuki's Earth.
b) They don't use Earth meaning planet, but Earth as the place where Humanity is - this is just where the Humans actually are right now, after all they don't just need a place to return to, they also need a place to return from as well.
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A notable line here includes 10H confirming to Yuzuki that the Round Egg in the Background (ROUND EGG, ROUND EGG, ROUND EGG!) "must be" the Cage, but that it's "not supposed to be here."
You know another Round Egg that can move around to anywhere it feels like at will and also contains the entirety of Human Memories within it? Well of course, It's time for me to bring up the only thing I ever talk about, YoRHa:Dark Apocalypse!
I've brought up before that there are certain similarities Anogg displays with Noelle's Introductory Chapter and at the time I thought that Noelle's whole deal might be involved in the creation of the Pseudo-Seed from Y:DA. But now that her backstory is fully revealed I actually think it's the other way around.
We now know that Noelle is actually a Human Clone that was created from a human after Humanity disappeared - but that makes it impossible that the Y:DA Pseudo-Seed was based on her if we do consider it to be the same or even just a copy of the Cage, because as we now know the Cage is part of Humanity's plan to Return - which means it must have existed before experimentation on Noelle even started.
Basically I think that Noelle was created using the same technology that was used to create the Cage - a Seed of Destruction. Which - if she actually is one of the pre-established "Dragon Weapons" - is actually pretty likely, because we know Accord had her fingers in making those Weapons happen and we know thanks to countless cameos that the Cage is Accords whole thing - and Accord is really the first and probably only person we know who could even possibly provide a Seed to do that with in the first place.
So while I had thought before that what we see the Red Girls do and what we see Anogg do in Y:DA with and/or caused by the Pseudo-Seed was just from whatever the Red Girls did to it, I think it's now much more likely that that's just how the Cage functions that the Red Girls copied. What if the Cage doesn't just store them, what if it can also Recreate Humanity when the time is right? And they were going to set that in motion after YoRHa defeats the Machine Lifeforms - which just doesn't seem to happen?
Or maybe Humanity's plan was to shoot themselves into space and recreate their entire planet where ever they land, just like the Tower/Cannon the Red Girls create and the Dark Apocalypse they chime in on Norvrandt!
Whatever it turns out being, I think Humanity turned a Seed of Destruction into a literal Seed of Resurrection. And wouldn't that be poetic as fuck. long live optimism, humanity is good sometimes
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sotwk · 7 months
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Behind the Scenes: SotWK's Writing Process
Welcome to a little "behind the scenes" of my attempts to keep my growing list of WIPS and story requests/ideas organized!
My Fic and HC Requests are (for the most part), always open, and open to Anons. Occasionally, I also invite requests in relation to writing events or games. Needless to say, I get quite a lot of requests, and I am both flattered and thrilled by that.
However, I also work full-time (albeit always in front of a computer), and I have two little kids (who attend preschool, whew), so I have much less time to focus on writing than most creators here.
But I love writing, and I love using it to make people happy even more. My rule is, I will accept any requests (that reasonably fall within my guidelines, but I can be flexible!) as long as you can wait patiently for me to deliver on them. I always give my best effort to make it worth your while, and I will never ignore your request or give up on it without checking with you first (yes, this includes Anons).
I have no wait list. I do not work on requests "in the order they were received". I work on whatever story speaks to and cooperates with me that day, and that means shuffling amongst up to five WIPs at a time. That's simply how my brain works, unfortunately.
All my fanfics / your requests are always, and forever will be, FREE. They're gifts I am honored to give.
I am constantly saying, "I'm working on it" or "It's on my list", and I would like to offer just a bit of proof of that. So, especially for those who have been waiting a long time (and those who might have to wait even longer), I present my Google Drive's Organized Chaos to show how I keep all those WIPs in check:
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Drafts in Progress: Stories that are closest to completion, and the ones I am currently trying to focus on.
Drafts on Hold: Drafts that I have started, but have stalled, so they're on the back burner for now.
Headcanons: I usually draft my headcanon requests straight on Tumblr, but sometimes they go on here.
Ask Screenshots: Where I save Asks that I responded to/deleted, but I needed to save the text for the sake of notes. Also lovely Asks that I save for posterity.
Valentine Event: I received so many Asks for this event that it required its own folder.
Gifted Graphics: Always hoping for new contributions to this one! (not subtle enough?)
And now, for my Fic Tracker Spreadsheet, which tracks ALL Tolkien fics I write, both requests and my personal projects:
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I redacted the "Requestor" column to preserve some surprises. I track the estimated "Status" aka percentage of completion as a way to motivate myself, because getting to that blessed 100% is the Holy Grail for me!
WIP: Every fic that's on the "front burner" and I'm actively fighting to complete.
Requests/Concepts: Contains details of all requests and ideas I have which will eventually jump into the WIP tab.
Valentine: Remember how I said I received so many responses to this event? Yeah. I'm still determined to finish them all, though!
To Read: Yup, I track all the fics of friends that I intent to read here, too. That's how important those are to me.
I truly hope all this info doesn't scare anyone off from sending in more requests! I hope this gives Readers/Followers a little more faith in me and show that I take all requests I receive very seriously. They are the most important part of what I do as a fanfic writer.
I may be slow, but I'm committed and determined!
If you have any questions about the above, or about your requests, I'm open! Please keep sending in requests! Thank you for your support and patience!
Link to my FANFIC REQUEST GUIDELINES
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Tagging some of those folks who are currently waiting on requests: @quickslvxrr @laneynoir @ladyweaslette @scyllas-revenge @lathalea @g-m-kaye @absentmindeduniverse @aduialel @friendofthefellowshipsnerdblog @jordie-your-local-halfling @ladyk8tie @blueberryrock @the-phantom-of-arda @tamurilofrivendell @achromaticerebus @klytemnestra13 @glassgulls @the-fragile-heart-of-a-lady @guardianofrivendell @a-burr-a-hobbit @literary-eclair
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ninjaofdeath16 · 3 months
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From dumpster fire to hopeful
Hello lovely readers,
As 2023 finally comes to an end, I can say that I really can't wait for it to end. The last six months of my life have been an utter dumpster fire due to medical issues, heavy losses, and my inability to get published as I wanted to. Needless to say, that 2023 did NOT do according to plan in any shape, form, or fashion and after a mountain of grief, tears, and coffee, I'm ready to let this year end and start fresh for 2024.
Despite the last six months, not all of 2023 was bad. I patched up a few relationships with people, made new friends, made detailed cross-stitch pillows for many amazing people who I greatly admire and appreciate, my boss at my job is (finally) retiring, got 40 subscribers on Youtube, finally started a patreon after indecision and procrastination, and have finally gotten into a better headspace for writing after lingering in the murky waters of just crappy reality.
Once again, I'm planning things, making goals, and fingers crossed that I'll achieve them. I've been absent from Tumblr and writing as a whole, only occasionally sharing/reblogging things and updating my stories. I've genuinely missed being on Tumblr and writing just in general. As I'm trying to realign my life and get things in order, I am hoping to post on Tumblr more. However, I will be making changes to quite a few things.
I still plan to write monster romances because that's just where a lot of my passion rests; however, I am going to stop writing the Disney Recruiter fanfics. But for real this time. . . Why? Well, Disney is Disney and copyright claims are a massive pain in my ass that I've decided I no longer want to put up with if I want to self-publish. I am still writing the stories; however, I'm titling them as 'Fairytale Retellings' that way I can freely write what I want without stress and worries. I still plan to use most of the Recruiters as inspiration, but they're all getting different themes, names, and whatever else I need for the narrative. That said, what's been written as in terms of the fanfics, I will leave up. Nothing will be updated to those stories, [Fanfic Black Apple Poison, Three Hearts, & The Last Card] but I will leave them up for your viewing pleasures.
For those that don't know, and those that do, I do have a patreon, but I'm terrible about promoting it because, well the last six months have been dumpster fires for me. I have more 'free' users than actual users. 'Free' users on Patreon means you can see the posts I've made publicly (which is very far and few) but you can't actually access/read/interact with any of my actual posts on Patreon. Due to the chaos that's been my life for the past six months, Black Apple Poison didn't get published, and to make up for that, I've been posting chapter by chapter of the new and improved story for my patrons. Getting back on topic, similar to how Webtoons works where there is a limited number of chapters for comics posted on Webtoons and then there's more on the Patron, that's how I plan to move forward. I will provide the Prologue and the first three chapters, starting January 2024, and will post chapters here on Tumblr accordingly. Since the story said it didn't want to stick to the original plot-hole-filled story and wanted to be better, it has hence made me rewrite the story over and it's something completely new. And honestly, I'm so much happier with it now because of it.
While I'm planning on writing Black Apple Poison, I'm also wanting to write a new story as well~ Scars & Roses, an old western paranormal romance featuring a very hard and grumpy werewolf who falls in love with the sugary sweet elemental witch. I have so many things I want to write and share with all of you, so I hope you look forward to 2024 as much as me ^_^. Thanks for coming along this stagnant journey with me, I really hope next year will be full of more fun written adventures.
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the-fandom-crossroads · 5 months
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Important Fandom Interest Check Poll!
Please vote and share around if you would be interested in a Genshin fic rec archive blog!
The basic idea would be an archive of posts linking to tumblr or ao3 fics of extremely high quality. It would make it easier to find older fics that are finished but don't have the high kudos to come up when you search by most kudos. The categories would be based on main ship or gen and the ship tag would only have fics with that ship in it. All fics would be read by me or a second mod before being added to the archive and they don't have to be complete before being added.
I am just trying to see if there is any interest in this type of blog. If the no's seem to be a lot or the number of votes is small all together. I won't sink time into coding a tumblr blog template.
If you are interested please consider reblogging so your genshin friends can also vote!
More about how this might work under the read more.
I would have submissions open and you would be free to submit your own fics along with others. I just can't guarantee I'd put it on the blog. I'd have final say to veto any fic submission. But the main reason would probably be needless smut.
Yes I am aware the idea of a genshin fic archive sounds redundant. Check marking only your ship on AO3 never gives you 20 oneshot compilation fics with other ships before the first solo fic or anything. The whole point is to make it so you don't have to scroll through countless not great fics that just happen to include your ship in the tags. And again to help older fics not get lost in the pile.
Genshin gets 100s of fics posted per day on AO3. It's not easy to sort through all of it. The blog is meant to make that easier. Also Tumblr fics. Those get lost to the void of character/reader what if posts never to be seen again.
Even if nsfw fics are included fics that are 50%-100% smut won't be included. I just can't read through that much porn personally. Including 18+ would just mean slow burns with countless chapters of character build up before one smut chapter wouldn't automatically be excluded. They would still be tagged and stored separately from other fics in that ships category.
Kaeyluc will be excluded by default. Along with any smut fics including child characters and rape/noncon. Also Porn without plot like mentioned above.
Quality would not be judged by kudos or any other metric. I even plan to allow fics with questionable spelling and grammar to an extent. If your story is moving or does something interesting with the characters involved. Then I don't care if you mix up your there, their, and they're. I don't want to exclude non-native english speakers from this list. The fic just needs to be readable.
Most ship fics would probably be mlm or wlw. There is just a larger quantity of those in general on ao3. I don't mind including lumineXchilde or LumineXdainsleif. But any other het ships will probably be reliant on submissions to be found and added.
But none of this is set in stone except for what I would be excluding. Tho that list might get longer. This is all just the basic idea and any suggestions on how to make it better are greatly appreciated!
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naffeclipse · 10 months
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NAAAAAFF :D HI!!! Recently I binge-read all of Sleuth Jesters and since then I’ve been rooting through your blog for any additional content like a raccoon through a dumpster <3 Legitimately better than some published books I’ve read. Thought it was worth mentioning that after Vigilante, Moon and Eclipse got shot I remember joking to myself “hey, now all that’s left is for Sun to get shot, then everyone will have had a turn! We’ll be four for four! C’mere, Sunny boy!” … needless to say, I began regretting that joke VERY QUICKLY. I felt like that “no no no WAIT WAIT WAIT” meme. Sun, my boy, I am so sorry :’) But seriously though, that moment?? Eclipse’s reaction?? Calling out to Sun in shock, then again in what almost looks like anger? Because no, that didn’t happen, I didn’t shoot you, I don’t make mistakes like this, so just get the hell up! Almost as if he’s angry at Sun, at the universe for allowing this to happen, because surely it can’t be his own fault, right? That’s impossible. Like he’s prepared to blame everyone and everything but himself for what HE just did, because despite everything, despite all his threats and bitterness and trying to convince himself otherwise, he still loves his little brothers. AND MOON, frozen there in horror, because this all just happened too fast and now it’s like the world’s been flipped on its head, because he also never truly believed Big Brother would or could follow through on those threats. Not like this. It’s such a short scene (there would’ve been what, ten seconds tops between Sun getting shot and the ceiling collapsing?) but it’s SO impactful, with very little going on but also everything is happening at the same time. It lives rent free in my brain, I am OBSESSED WITH IT. I’m DYING just like Sun and Eclipse haha  to know, what would have happened if the ceiling hadn’t collapsed on Eclipse, at least not at that moment? What would he have done?? What would MOON have done?! CURSE YOU, BUILDING, YOU HAVE TERRIBLE TIMING!! (God, these brothers have got me in a chokehold. Chewing on them, shaking them, gazing at them, rattling them around in my brain constantly. I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOUR.) Whoops this got longer than intended. Long story short, thank you for reminding me of how much I secretly love detective noir stuff, Naff <3 Your writing is beautiful and I am studying it and you to hopefully pick up on the thought and care you put into everything and utilise some of it myself <3
Hey, babe! Oh man, you're making me melt! Thank you so much!
PFFFT such a great joke at such a bad time LASJDFLASFD
You're so sweet, ahhh, thank you!!! I'm really happy you enjoyed Sleuth Jesters and that moment, ahhh! One of my favorite things I've ever written!
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safyresky · 1 month
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🆕 Crystal Springs Chapter 30: "What Comes Next" now up on ao3/ff dot net!
Chapter 30: What Comes Next
Jacqueline wakes up; Jack fixes the Dome. With everything all but wrapped up, what comes next?
ao3 | ff dot net
you guys...she's finished.
Crystal Springs is actually, honest to goodness, FINISHED. THIS IS THE LAST HECKING CHAPTER! I AM BALLING IN THE CLUB RIGHT NOW!
Please, take my humble excerpt while I SOB UNCONTROLLABLY--
Bright. It was bright. It had been so, so dark and now it was so, so bright. Why was it so bright? She cracked open her eyes. Bright. Blurry. Sunlight. Water. Humid air. Blue eyes. “…Jack?” A sharp inhale. “Oh, darling. I’m so, so sorry.” “Momma?” She was being crushed. Her tummy hurt. Momma was sniffling. “But where’s…where’s Jack?” She tightened her hold. She didn’t reply. This was wrong. It was bright out. Too bright. But it wasn’t the right kind of bright. She closed her eyes tightly. Opened them again. Squinted. It was bright. Way too bright. Artificial bright. She groaned, turning her head to the side. Blue eyes. “…Jack?” “Jacqueline?” On the edge of his seat, Jack watched as Jacqueline’s eyes finally opened—only to immediately shut tight once more as she winced at the bright light. She groaned. Wrinkled her nose. Her eyes popped open again, blues meeting blues. She blinked. Smiled. “You are here.” “Welcome back, little flurry.”
THIS IS MY FAVOURITE PART OF THE WHOLE THING I AM A MESS! AND I HAVE NOBODY TO BLAME BUT MYSELF!
So, indeed. What DOES come next? Read on at ao3 and ff dot net to find out!
Want to start from the top and read it ALL IN ONE GO, NOW? You can do that HERE on ao3 and HERE on ff dot net! I think it's time for a new pinned post now, lol.
Story summary and chapter musings below the cut!
It’s been almost a year since Jack Frost thawed and things are looking…well, not so great. Jack’s powers are seemingly gone. Without them, the Dome that keeps the North Pole safe from the cold and its magic controlled is melting, putting everything and everyone magical at risk. Unable to hide his power shortage any longer, Jack is forced to admit the truth. Thankfully, there is a solution: enacting the Legate Law, bringing Jack and the sister that he hurt so many centuries ago back together again. But when Jacqueline starts experiencing destructive blackouts, the pair are forced to head back home to Crystal Springs, bringing Jack face to face with the rest of the family. Needless to say, between getting his powers back, helping his sister figure out what in the FROST those blackouts even were, reconciling with his parents, meeting the two even younger siblings he didn’t even KNOW he had, NOT TO MENTION the ancient threat that’s had it out for the ENTIRE Frost family finally making a move? Saving Christmas (regrettably) is looking to be a little bit…complicated.
And there we have it! After way too many years, Crystal Springs is done! Again again! TBH it's probably a GOOD thing I paused halfway through rewriting--my writing has gotten muchas better and I don't think the story would be as lovely as it is now if I HADN'T taken a huge long ass pause from round 2 for a haute minute!
So, here's what's 🆕 This Chapter:
Kept the sillies but made them FLOW better
Since Fino got a whole ass bonding scene with Jack a couple chapters back, the Elfirmary scene went to Fiera instead, and it is LOVELY. It worked out well! She surprised me a BUNCH!
Lucy is in character now :) Love to see it :)
WORD COUNT!!!!!!
And I think that's about it!
OG 2014 Edition: 7,114k words
NEW 202X Edition: 15,387k ish words
Thank you all so much for reading and commenting and creating with me! I really hope that Crystal Springs is as delightful a read as it was to write 🥰🥰
In the meantime! Here's what we can expect to see from the CS-Universe:
Frostmas making it's way over to ao3 monthly! Complete with minor edits for a fresh ✨GLOW UP✨
Smile Shots creeping over there
NEW Smile Shots creeping up over here
The usual scrimblies
Into the Shadows musings? We'll see. She's a little disjointed rn but will be sO FUN once I've got all the threads connected 🥳🥳
And thank you from the very bottom of my heart for coming along on this ride with me! And the asks and the art--all of it has been so, so amazing and SO lovely to see! I cannot tell you all how happy my heart is knowing these lil fucks (affectionate) have resonated with you all, too 🧡💙🤍💖
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manonamora-if-reviews · 10 months
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Computerfriend by Kit Riemer
============= Links
Play the game (or its alternate version) See other reviews of the game See other games by Kit or follow @adz
============= Synopsis
The year is 1999. The place is Godfield, Louisiana: the tech capital of the world, where the sky bleeds acid and the mud boils in the bayou. It’s time for your state-mandated digital therapy.
============= Other Info
Computerfriend is a Twine (SugarCube) interactive game, submitted to the 2022 Edition of the SpringThing. I playtested this game.
Status: Completed Genre: Sci-Fi, Cyberpunk
CW: suicide, violence, consent violation, bodily fluids, animated content Note: the animation can be toggled off. Also drastic change of colour between passages.
============= Playthrough
First Played: March 2022 Last Played: 30-May-2023 Playtime: around 20min (one ending) - 1h+ (another ending) Rating: 5 /5 Thoughts: Therapy: Hardcore mode.
============= Review
Computerfriend is a nihilistic take on a future/past, where everyone is miserable and somehow still living through a more-than-poluted world devoid of community sense and safety nets. Following an unnamed incident, you are required to follow therapy sessions via a AI program on your computer, the eponymous Computerfriend(.exe). However, this program is not... what you'd expect of therapy.
Spoilers ahead. It is recommended to play the game first. The review is based on my understanding/reading of the story.
Computerfriend was my introduction to Kit's world, randomly answering a call to playtest it ahead of the SpringThing 2022. I remember it being very confusing and trippy and gross, and yet I did not want/could not to look away. I devoured that game, and played again and again until I had found all endings*. *Ok, I'll come clean, I cheated for a few. I opened the file on Twine and looked up how to get there.
Coming back to the game felt like swimming in a strange but comforting acid pit*, and talking to computerfriend.exe felt like talking to an old toxic friend you are not quite sure whether they mean good or harm. Needless to say, I was like a kid in a bath, refusing to leave. *dw I've never really done that.
Not going to lie, this game is very strange. And it has been stuck in my mind for over a year now. It has marked me in ways I'm still discovering today. Even if it is not supposed to be beautiful, with its blinding change of colours or its eye-printing fonts or the literal ugliness of the setting, there is still charm in the harshness of the visual. Even if it is not supposed to be cathartic, each story run left me strangely satisfied and [at peace / terrified / confused / angry / revolted]. Even if it was incredibly bleak and borderline fatalistic, with an unliveable world devoid of nature and cows that can lay eggs, there is still shreds of hope in there that survival is still possible, maybe for a bit longer.
In its indulgence in all that is considered bad, the game manages to be so incredibly good.
~~~
Honestly, I could stop here and be satisfied. This ruly incapsulate all my feelings about the game. But because I am greedy, here's below some randomly organised thoughts about the game. This is just because I want to talk about the AI program and could not find a better transition.
While the story is supposed to be about your recovery, the main show revolved around computerfriend.exe, your at-home therapist AI, which still needs a bit of tweaking before it can help you get back on track. At first, it seems the AI does not truly listen to you, as it goes down a checklist as if to fill in a form (to try to understand you) - the dissonance between your answers to questions and its responses is very staggering (for lack of better word). As you progress down the "recovery" path, the AI will propose different treatments, going from strange to terrifying to injecting yourself with drugs. If you refuse or don't find the treatment useful, it will pressure you to continue. Even saying NO is a painstaking process (and the first time, it is even ignored).
computerfriend.exe can truly be awful, but it remarkably funny. When it first assesses you, it does not just look up your location or how the weather is, but also finding the contacts to the nearest first respondent and pollen level (am i supposed to have hay fever?). This might be the bleakness of the game affecting me, but I still chuckle at it. Same after you close the application and try to reopen it, it will tell you to butt off because it is busy. It even gives you homework, actions to essentially distract yourself until the next session (and the options are delightful).
Some more random stuff, but less long:
starting with the 5 See, 4 Touch, 3 Hear, 2 Smell, 1 Taste calming method was brilliant, especially because it makes the situation all the more dire and tense.
The fucking computer visuals were so dope, especially that 90s webpage with the gifs everywhere, the weirdass adds, and the clashing colours. The news headline killed me.
transgender_foucault is an amazing username (especially having studied the work of foucault)
the world is so fucked up you can eat a kebab made of human flesh (just some cells mutating to make meat). Is that the future awaiting us?
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definitelynotshouting · 4 months
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Hello I’m here!!
Raaah I meant to talk about the latest chapter sooner but I kept forgetting :,))
But anyway! This chapter really hit home for me and I really resonate with Grian, and I feel so SO scared for him at the same time. The idea that he’s so dead set on hurting himself so badly and mumbo has no idea - along with the rest of the hermits - is very scary, and very effective.
And the fact that they’ve already witnessed him trying to hurt himself in such a way and they’re all trying to cope with that is so. It’s so good. The way you show how each person is dealing with Grian’s attempt is so good because you’re showing them all experiencing different forms of grief.
Mumbo yelled because he was afraid. Tango is trying to help Grian any time he can. Scar is trying to make him laugh. X is dead set on finding a way to save him. Pearl is upset with him. It’s such a good way of showing that grief can manifest in so many different ways, and no one is perfect- they do things like yell because they’re scared, or overstep because they want to help. No one prepares you for grief, and you do an amazing job of showing that.
I can’t express how badly I want to hold Grian’s hand. To me he feels like such a lost soul that feels there’s no hope for him. I have so much sympathy for this depiction of him.
It feels so.. “doomsday” to me?? If that makes sense? The way Grian talks about wanting to go outside and experience the sun and the grass and the sky for one last time before he leaves for good. I feel the bittersweet feeling he must be feeling; not wanting to hurt his friends’ feelings but simultaneously feeling like there’s no other option for him and he just has to do this, so he wants to have a good last day.
It pains my heart so much but in a good way- this is all extremely /pos I cannot express that enough. I think it’s so impressive that you’re able to capture such intense feelings through writing- that’s seriously incredible and if what I’m feeling when reading your story is what you’re after; you’re doing an amazing job!
Ok, I don’t want to overwhelm you so I’ll stop there- but needless to say I’m super excited to see where this story goes and I hope you’re doing well <3
- binge reader
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BINGER READER ANON MY HEART....... ohhh this is such a sweet ask and im so unwell abt it /pos
Words cannot express how happy i am that you're resonating so hard with my fic 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i feel so honored to be touching people's lives with this, i literally dont know how to articulate how much messages like these mean to me. And im just!!!! So pleased that you like what im doing with all these varying depictions of grief!!! From the start i truly wanted to explore different reactions and what i felt these characters would do when placed in such a fraught and urgent situation, and im indescribably glad im hitting the mark on what ive been aiming for.
Its been really enriching for me to explore all these myriad reactions to grief; i remember when i first wrote Mumbo in chapter 3, i was a bit worried about the potential reception-- but it felt so right to let him express his fear through anger. And with Pearl, ive loved taking a deep dive into her own fear and trauma and letting it play out in front of Grian during this situation. Literally everyone is so fun to dive into for all the reasons you've said-- Tango is in fix-it mode, Xisuma is pinning all his efforts on one desperate hope, and Scar is deflecting and trying to buy as much time as possible just to keep Grian alive a little longer. Their various reactions are so important to me, especially in how, like you said, nothing truly prepares you for grief-- and it often manifests in unconventional ways. Its been a real treat to depict that, and its something that i feel has some overlooked merit in the emotional realism department that im glad im able to bring to the table
Im truly so touched by this commentary, so don't worry about overwhelming me!!! Im just so genuinely happy people are getting so much out of my writing, its all ive wanted for such a long time, and finally being able to really reach people with it is a dream come true❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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weaselbeaselpants · 1 year
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Since I am familiar with the 2012-2016 comic, lemme just say that having too many characters wasn't the problem with Zoophobia. Viv's right in that it was a problem- but it's not THE problem. It's a problem that I think crops up in a lot of her works. Viv has really solid ideas for premises and characters, I think. I really liked the Helluva Boss pilot, Timber is good, I liked parts of Hazbin Hotel and the first chapter/set up into Zoophobia and it's world (Safe Haven) are honestly pretty good. Obviously made by and for an indulgent writer wanting to showcase a bunch of things they like? Yes but that's not a flaw in itself- also that describes half of like, EVERYONE ON TUMBLR's concepts, don't lie to me.
If you've never read the 2012 comic, Zoophobia's 'main' character was a human named Cameron who has actual zoophobia along with just an understandable reaction to being trapped in a mythical world of animals and monsters. She's skittish and unlucky and she gets a job at Phoenix University basically being a counseler and shrink to the students. This is a GREAT set up because what ZP was about was a chance for Viv to show off her childhood-made OCs (or just any OC she wanted to feature/talk about). It'd ostensibly would make a great 'OC of the Week' comic; Cameron is supposed to just be the school counselor but like in Undertale or maybe Amphibia, she gets dragged waaay too deep into the individual character's worlds and conflicts, which would be how she AND US, get to know them-
-yeah, the comic wasn't like that. Despite giving Cameron a perfect fantasy-inclined excuse to follow the student characters around because they were the actual focus, instead the comic just completely shifted focus onto Zill, Kayla and Damien in chapter 3 apart from Cameron. She should have been the one to see Damien's lie and be aware of the true cause of Zill and Kayla's scism. Maybe she didn't/couldn't do anything on her own because as established, she's scared of the animal people and monsters. She should have been with Damien's chaparones, looking for him in his chapter. I like Cameron (and so could the audience) not because she's interesting but because she's a surrogate for us. It's such an easy enough fix, and with a bit better focusing on the right characters with their arcs (Zill and Kayla in their arc; Jack in his; just Damien in his arc; just Addison in his), maybe cut some otherwise needless side characters and fill the background cast of one arc with what would have been the supporting from another- that would be interesting.
Viv has this 'thing' where she really likes to pitch a series/story with an ensemble cast everytime all the time. That wouldn't be so bad if she definitely had a role for the characters to play in the eventual story...but she doesn't. She has characters she really likes playing with and writing about and then other characters being horribly sidelined, which is a problem when the sideline-victim-in-question is an establishing character or the MAIN character even...and it really ends up effecting every character because then, when it comes to the mains Viv wants to write about- they feel way to overbloated or underdeveloped compared to how they were hyped up. Rewatched the pilot and this is still my problem with Alastor and Angel!
Alastor is supposed to be mysterious. He should be mysterious. Build up some tension with this obviously menacing smily-deer man by never showing you what he really can do in the end and ABSOLUTELY NO 'exposition sequence' from Vaggie essentially spoiling why he's just so important. Whether it is a stand alone story, the pilot to a longer series, or the intro to a longer series- it takes away so much of the bite from Al in favor of what the writers gushing over him.
Angel, meanwhile, is all but the real face of Hazbin, not Charlie. He's Viv's favorite character, not her. Within the pilot he's supposed to be her gunnea pig, but I was so underwhelmed by him.
Because they had to make him a jerk who doesn't care about the hotel at all, they gave him functionally nothing to do or care about at all- and that made him feel like complete filler. I keep asking again and again WHY Angel of all characters wasn't the main focal character, and/or why he wasn't the one to warn Charlie about Alastor. It really does feel like, after Alastor enters the story, Angel has to just go because his planet needs him and then he dies on the way to his home planet. This is YOUR BOY, Viv! Give your boy the spotlight he deserves and that you clearly want for him.
To me, Viv is really good at pitching a concept, but when it comes to actually executing the idea her works turn into fan fiction of themselves. From what I've heard, this is the 'problem' with Helluva Boss, that it's now "the Stolitz show" because Viv and her crew clearly lost themselves writing about them that they forgot about the main premise: low-level demons holding a service for sinners and causing mayhem wherever they go because of it. Either the show should have pitched itself with just Blitzo, Moxxie, and Stolas being the real power over the group which would have set up Stolas being such a key figure in the story, ax Millie and Loona from the main cover image or the main lineup- OR, you focus on all four of the supposed main characters first and leave the Stolas and possibly Stolitz stuff for later.
Tl;dr: I soooo wish Viv would make the basic script bible and "plot" of the series and then hand the actual writing of her stuff off to someone else. I'm sorry if I'm 'lame' in the eyes of the antis and stuff, but I actually really like Brandon's specific outlandish humor and I enjoy the Hazbin cast when they're in fanfics enough.....but I just feel like Viv herself is well outside her comfort zone trying to write lore or anything resembling a longer story.
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lutiaslayton · 4 months
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Hello! You seem to be knowledgeable about Japan-exclusive Layton stuff so I wanted to ask if you knew how many chapters were there in Mansion Of The Deathly Mirror? I tried to look it up myself but I couldn't find an actual answer
Thank you for all your translations btw I really appreciate them!
Hi, and thanks! <3 There are six chapters in total. For more info, I will simply give you (and anyone else who reads this) a Reddit post:
This post explains everything we know about Mansion of the Deathly Mirror and how to deal with the fact that this game is lost media.
That link aside, I have a transcript planned for Mansion of the Deathly Mirror just like I did with Chelmey's Casebook and London Holiday, but I don't even have the full first chapter completed yet, so I'll have to catch up whenever I have the time and materials to do so. I haven't had the time to work on it in many months, but don't worry, I haven't forgotten about it and I WILL make a better, FULL version of the translation, as soon as I can get to it (but right now I'm kinda supposed to be preparing for my PhD defence hahahahaha).
Now for some ramblings related to the above-linked Reddit post. Long story short: we have chances of securing the game. But for that to happen, we need to be patient, and we need to be silent. If you ever find footage of the game on youtube or elsewhere, no matter what you do, leave the player alone.
Let them upload at their pace and gather the crumbs as they fall off the table, because asking for them to let you eat the whole cake has never worked in the past. By that I mean: asking someone who owns the game "hey can I see your cool shiny thing asap plz plz plz" will result in that person blocking you, no longer posting any footage or content related to that cool shiny thing, and possibly disappearing off the face of the entire internet forever. I am neither joking, nor exaggerating.
I'm not talking that much about MotDM because we don't want to get too much attention drawn to it for the time being. But don't worry, if this game ever is found (and we have a whole team searching for it, we're just secretive on purpose -- for the reasons I mentioned here and for those that are explained in more detail in the Reddit post), we WILL make sure that the fandom knows about it. It's mostly just that right now, the only person we know who has the game and is somewhat willing to make a playthrough does not want any unwanted attention, and this person is not a friend of ours. They will stop uploading if people ask for them to upload faster, and they already threatened once to delete all their videos when someone asked them if they could "share the ROM." (No. No they won't. And even if they were willing to, we can't even make anything out of a ROM yet because of the hardware being stupidly complicated anyway.)
---
So there you have it -- your answer is "6," and I could have left it at that because I have no strict obligation to say anything more since you didn't ask for any other info haha.
Unless you want to dive into this endless rabbit hole, I highly suggest you just keep that answer, leave it at that for now, and go about your day minding literally anything else. We will get back to you and the rest of the fandom once we have real news about it! It's just that for now we're all stuck in limbo hahaha, there's some stuff done in the shadows but nothing worth hyping about until we're done with it. I mean -- we can't do anything until the one (1) person who owns the game decides to upload more footage of it. Given how desperately lost this game is, we should actually be happy we get to have anything at all, even if even NWoS might come out before it.
[EDIT] Needless to say, the player who is sharing some gameplay footage does NOT know that I have a website with the beginning of a fan-translation, and if they learn even so little that it exists, they are going to have a heart attack and will likely delete their entire playthrough. And nobody wants that.
I personally won't celebrate and heave a real breath of relief before footage of the full game from start to finish with as much content as possible is secured, which is why I don't talk about it a lot. I'm just paranoid that something might go wrong like it already has multiple times in the past hahaha
---
DO NOT show my website link around at random until I say it's ok to do so. And if you share it with friends, ALWAYS mention that I am the one running it. That way if you or your friends have questions, you know who to ask for explanations.
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astriiformes · 8 months
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18, 22, and 29 for the fic asks, please!
18 - Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?
Oh this so, so depends on the fic, in part because every once and a while an excellent title descends upon me early in the process and also if I'm working on a fic for a while I have more time to think.
Usually my fics start out with placeholder titles that are whatever came to mind when I first saved the document; I'm yet to have one of those graduate to being a final title but that's partially because they're all things like this:
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...and are often tonally different than what I'm actually going for.
As far as where my titles end up actually coming from, poems are a common culprit; I've got one or two song lyric ones, and some inspired by various other cultural references (ranging from like... pop cultural to Biblical). I tend to try to work in some wordplay, irony, or symbolism where I can, and love a title with layers.
Breaking down a couple recent ones:
Beharren ist eine Kunst -- German for "Persistence is an art," stemming from the longer proverb "Anfangen ist leicht, Beharren eine Kunst" (Beginning is easy, persistence an art), works particularly well for a story about an artist where "Kunst" doubles as a bit of a play on words.
Stemma Codicum -- A textual criticism term referring to the chart that can be drawn of different manuscripts relationship to each other (what was copied from what, where changes entered into the manuscript transmission process, and etc). Worked really well for a Pentiment fic about three "alternate timelines" all branching from a single change at a specific point in canon -- manuscript transmission as a metaphor for those critical points in people's lives that manage to change everything!
Long Upon the Land -- A tongue-in-cheek reference to Exodus 20:12, which reads ""Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee"," as a title for a fic in which a character with an overbearing abusive father contemplates art and things that can outlast us across generations. Really loved the irony with this one, it's one of my favorites I've come up with in a while.
Needless to say they draw from all over the places, but I feel like between them it's pretty easy to get a feel for what I like in titles.
22 - Are there certain types of writing you won’t do? (style, pov, genre, tropes, etc)
I don't want to say there's for sure something I won't do, just because it seems like there's exceptions to everything (Pentiment wrung a "Major Character Death" warning tag out of me which is a new one!), but in general I am pretty allergic to most romance tropes. I'll write romantic relationships -- although my fics rarely center on them, but that's one of those things I'd be willing to assume might have an exception one day -- but when I do, they tend not to be particularly trope-y. There's just a lot of amatonormativity steeped into ideas like soulmates, fake dating, etc, and I'm not interested enough in them to consider ways to rehabilitate them in my own writing. I am but a tired aro and while it means I'll never write the most popular fic in any fandom I'm in, I get by perfectly fine in my little gen niche.
I'm also not a big fan of writing in first person (reading can go either way! I'm less into it in fic unless the canon itself is in first person, but fine with it in original fiction), but even that one has an exception on the horizon! If and when I finally write my TOH Sherlock Holmes pastiche, it'll probably be in first person, to mimic the original source material. So really that's a great example of why I have a pretty solidly "never say never" stance on most non-romantic tropes and devices.
29 - What’s your revision or editing process like?
I have a horrible confession to make. I edit as I go. My terrible perfectionist brain struggles to make peace with messy first drafts, and while I'll often give things a final, editor's eye read-through once I've finished writing, the bulk of my editing happens on repeated re-readings of the material throughout the writing process.
This is not a good way of doing things and I would love to break the habit, particularly since I think it would result in me writing more and faster. Do as I say, not as I do, everyone.
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dollarbin · 3 months
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Shakey Sundays #5:
Neil Young and the Shocking Pinks' Everybody's Rockin'
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In 1983 Neil Young went bonkers when David Geffen put his foot down... who am I kidding? You all already know this story.
Yes, Neil had left Reprise Records the year beforehand and would forever regret it; yes, he dealt with his young son's inability to speak due to Cerebral Palsy by getting deep into assistive technology; and yes, he then turned that obsession into the primitive prequel to OK Computer that is Trans; yes, that record bombed even though it's actually pretty awesome; and yes, Geffen then rejected Young's next effort, Old Ways 1, and demanded a rock and roll record; and yes, finally, yes, that's why Young complied in the most Shakey possible and made the silliest record of his whole wonderfully silly career: Everybody's Rockin'.
But you didn't visit me on this fine Sunday to read stuff you already knew or can read on Wikipedia. You already know Stephen Stills sucks. You came because anybody who is crazy enough to think that this video was gonna make it big on MTV in 83 is your idea of awesome:
dailymotion
I have thousands of questions about this video. Did they pay for a real helicopter? Is that where all the wind is coming from or did the desert just happen to be that windy that day? Or did Neil summon his giant Budokan wind machines to the desert? If so, are they still out there? Did Geffen pay for all this? Is he still pissed?
And what's the plot here exactly? I see that Neil gets ditched by the band, fails to ride his large scale toy train, truck and chopper to where they're at, runs to them instead, and then the real helicopter shows up... But then what? Who the hell is in the dude in the chopper and what was he planning to offer them on paper (is it Geffen? But he gave Neil a contract! And then he accepted this record and this silly band after rejecting the previous one! What the hell's happening?) before he changed his fake-mustachioed mind?
But while we are at it, who are the actors Neil hired to be the Shocking Pinks in this thing? Are any of them his actual musicians? If not, did they put this acting gig on their resume?
Finally, back to the plot: do they ever make it out of the desert? Or are they still out there, rockin' away, everyone living in a communal trailer beside the Salton Sea and singing their hearts out to bewildered seagulls?
I have no idea. But the whole thing is so silly that it's outta control awesome; it's Neil at his sloppy, wacky best. Boo-hoo-hoo. Boo-hoo-hoo.
So let's talk about the record.
To begin, everything about Everybody's Rockin' is a joke.
Its length is a joke. At 25 minutes total, the entire record is shorter than the single first song on Psychedelic Pill; when I saw Neil play with the Horse on the Weld Tour in 92 he seemingly spent an equal amount of time in between each song, admiring the band's collective feedback. I imagine he spends way longer each day talking to his newest robot.
And the album's songs are a joke. Look no further than the lyrics to the title track:
When Ronnie and Nancy do the bop on the lawn They're rockin' in the White House all night long. Everybody's rockin'...
Needless to say Ronnie and Nancy did not invite Young the White House in response. Rather, they, respectively, committed war crimes and put the moves on Mr. T.
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And the Shocking Pinks are a joke. The great Ben Keith is in the group, along with Tim Drummond, one of the greatest bass players ever, and a host of other pros. But everyone plays the most simplified music of their career with great seriousness, careful not to ruin Neil's joke. Just take a listen to Kinda Fonda Wanda:
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The whole thing makes Dylan's Christmas record sound like Mozart.
Even the "Neil Young" on this record is a joke. Young acknowledges that the whole thing was "like being in a movie". He'd just finished playing the goofiest, nerdiest possible version of himself, Lionel Switch, in his dumpster fire of a film Human Highway. And he clearly wasn't done playing a bumbling dullard:
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Neil knew it all was a joke; after all, he was the one telling it. Years later he commented, "What am I? Stupid? Did people really think I put that out thinking it was the greatest fuckin' thing I'd ever recorded? Obviously I'm aware it's not."
And yet, he dedicated a full year and a half of his life to telling the joke over and over and over. He took the band and his character on tour, foisting it on audiences who'd paid to see Neil shred and play the hits; 17 years after Dylan fought the good fight at Royal Albert Hall and beyond, Neil fought a bizarre, self-created one, and it's impossible to tell to what extent he was giggling or furious.
After the two wonderful music videos flopped he even hired a big deal movie director, Hal Ashby, the guy behind Harold and Maude and Being There, to make an entire scripted film about it all.
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Neil Young: with every new wacko phase, he's like a dog with a bone. A year after Everybody's Rockin' he put body and soul into becoming the bizarro version of Willie Nelson; soon after that he donned Dan Aykroyd glasses and created his own version of The Blues Brothers. As we speak he's probably writing a Space Opera or converting water into wine, all while cackling madly.
If Neil's life is a movie, then he's forever hijacking his own script; and the sillier it gets the more fun we all have. With Shakey, Everybody's Always Rockin'.
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silent-silver-slip · 1 year
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Fires please please please write Charlie Weasley + his dragon tamer friends going to pick up Norbert through the lens of them as an exhausted, over-caffeinated grad school cohort trying to avoid working on their dragon tamer's equivalent of a thesis.
Knits, I love you and I ADORED This prompt and it went in a direction i did not expect, but I did enjoy writing some fun OCs. My apologies for any mistakes - I had work until 2am, am going off 5 hours of sleep, and it's almost bed time.
Needless to say, I'm a little tired lol. Story is below the line along with some fun little notes I made along the way!
Charlie feels like no one warmed him that studying dragons involved reports.
Which, look, sure it probably could have been explained in the whole ‘studying’ thing, and it’s not like Charlie minds reading or writing about dragons. He can do physical reports and description reports and health reports (and even incident reports)—but! He didn’t sign up for writing a Merlin damn thesis.
Except for, y’know, how he kind of did.
“Does anyone want to swap thesis topics?” Taylor asks, from where they’re on their bed—though, perhaps, it would be more accurate to say that they’re hanging off their bed, hair touching the ground. “I don’t think I understand anything about the keratin growth and how the production changes from an adult dragon to a hatchling dragon. I didn’t sign up to learn chemistry!”
Jessie kicks zir legs out. “I’ll trade,” ze says. “Do you know how little research exists on how sunlight effects the properties of dragon scales while the dragons themselves are still alive? The answer, in case you were wondering, is very little!”
“Would our supervisors kill us if we swapped topics a week before our three-minute presentations?” Charlie muses.
“Yes,” is the resounding answer he receives from the two other parties in the room. Charlie accepts this with a groan, and rolls over so that he’s face-first in the carpet. If he’s lucky, he might suffocate and die and not have to present his thesis at all.
One can always have hope.
There’s a moment of silence before Sunny says, “I suppose it’s a good time to mention I’m back?”
Charlie rolls over, and makes grabby hands at one of the mugs that Sunny has levitating beside her. “I love you,” he says. “What would I do without you?”
“That would be almost romantic if I didn’t know you were talking to your coffee,” Sunny says, “and also maybe if I was straight. Anyway, I caught the ends of the conversation—and I think our problems can all be blamed on one source.”
“Oh?” Taylor—no longer upside-down—says, before taking a long slurp of their coffee. Charlie pulls a face at the sound. At least he remembers his manners, for the most part.
Sunny hums as she hands Jessie zir drink. “Indeed. It’s Charlie’s fault.”
Charlie splutters, coughs, and almost dies by coffee. “I’m sorry, how?”
“Well,” Sunny says, as she begins to levitate herself, legs crossed, “consider our thesis topics themselves—do you know how often it is that there’s a focus on dragon health and safety to a standard above and beyond the Ministry standards? It’s not that often at all, you know.” The carpet rises until Sunny is sitting on it, and Charlie doesn’t know whether to frown at it—it never works for him—or at Sunny for her slander.
“She’s got a point,” Jessie says. Ze taps zir fingers against zir mug. “I mean, the sanctuary is a sanctuary, but usually research tends to be a little less ethical.”
By now, Charlie is well and truly frowning. “Just say cruel,” he says, anger growling in his chest like a dragon. “I mean, we’ve heard the rumours about how the goblins treat their dragons! But if I want to launch a rescue, it’s wrong and going to start a goblin war. I’m sure they wouldn’t notice if I figured out a way to create a spell that did the same thing without the whole sentient problem.”
“You,” Taylor says, with all the dramatics an over-caffeinated thesis student can contain, “are going to be trying to create this spell for years.”
Charlie sniffs. “That’s better than your first opinion of it taking decades,” he says, like he isn’t aware of the fact it will, likely, take decades. “Anyway, I fail to see how my caring for dragons wellbeing has anything to do with the struggles we face with our thesis?”
“I mean, it makes sense,” Taylor says. “The lack of research we run into is partially a result of our methods, really. I only look at shed scales, as does Jessie. You’re just insane, and Sunny is trying to start a new branch of research all on their own based on records from the dragon riders’ action in the war.”
“Well, when you put it that way,” Charlie says, and they all laugh at that.
Silence falls over the group as they let the warmth—and caffeine—of their drinks sink into their bloodstreams. Charlie glances at the letter off to the side, which he’d been using as a bookmark in a four-hundred-page book on how dragons have motivated spell development.
Pressing his lips together, Charlie considers it, and then surveys his friends and fellow students. Technically, they’re not formally recognised as students as they work on the sanctuary and get paid for it, but the research they do is a requirement to be recognised as having the academic requirements to work with dragons and, considering their workload on the sanctuary, Charlie bets that they’ll all get the title dragon tamer/worker or something too.
“You staring at the note like it hurt you personally for a reason, Char?”
Jessie’s voice has Charlie blinking and shaking his head. He really did drift away in his thoughts for a second. “I was wondering whether we would all like a break,” he says, “complete with a dragon hatchling and some adrenaline and maybe some minor illegal activities. Y’know, just for some fun.”
“Count me in,” Taylor says, with approximately zero hesitation—and it’s times like this that Taylor’s criminal record makes sense.
Somewhat more reasonable, Jessie says, “Can I ask for a bit more information?”
Charlie tosses the note in zir direction, only for the note to drift aimlessly down to the ground because—unsurprisingly—paper isn’t that good to throw when it’s not crumbled up into a ball. Pulling a face at it, Charlie says, “Well, one of my old teachers might have gotten a dragon illegally, and it might be a very dangerous breed, and he’s maybe keeping it in a wooden hut. Not fireproof, mind you. My youngest brother—Ron—found out and he and his friends think it would be best if the dragon was no longer where the dragon currently is.”
Jessie blinks once at his explanation, and then says, “Yeah, sure I’m in. Sunny?”
“Hm?” Sunny looks up at the call of her name. “Oh, I’m down. Sorry, didn’t think I needed to verbalise it. Tomorrow night, then?”
“Sure,” Charlie says with a shrug, rather nonplussed at how quickly it’s all coming together. His friends, after all, are insanely intelligent for all that they grumble over their thesis topics and research and the number of hours they spend on crying as opposed to actual writing.
So, really, there’s nothing else Charlie can say except, “I’ll bring the coffee.”
Additional notes:
Love how this kinda became crack
Sunny is trans (amab) and goes by Sunil, technically, but prefers Sunny by all
All of them are queer to varying degrees, which is just on point
Please don't ask me how any of the thesis work or how the whole academic requirements work because I will either not remember any thoughts I had while writing this or I will go off on a tangent (this is a joke, feel free to ask)
Yes I am scared of the fact I have to write a thesis for my degree, next question
Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed! I will likely upload this to AO3 when I locate a brain cell to edit and I'm not yawning so much lol.
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