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#nct collab call
rrxnjun · 2 years
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THE CRUSH CHRONICLES: AN NCT DREAM COLLAB
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❥ hello! this is y/n and welcome to my new youtube video! to celebrate my 600 followers milestone, I prepared something special: let's look at all the boys I've ever had a crush on and interrogate them with a fun questionare! ❥
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notes. happy 600 followers! thank you all so much for reading my fics and for following this blog! as a celebration, i decided to do something special that i wanted to do for a long time, and that is host this sweet collab!
about. this collab is inspired by one of previous youtube trends, and that is 'sending a quiz to all the boys i've had a crush on'
all the fics will have to follow a similar format! that is the original quiz the reader sent to one of the boys. show us the relationship between y/n and one of the dreamies through your fic!
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rules. the collab has 7 slots (although i'm reserving one of the dreamies for myself!) first come, first serve basis!
the collab also has 7 genre/au slots, first come, first serve basis! it wouldn't make sense for the reader to have a crush on two of her neighbours or to have her have five best friends, so i want to make sure that each member gets a slightly different storyline and genre! don't be afraid to get creative with it and bring something new to the table!
the collab is open to both fluff and angst stories, however, nsfw is strictly prohibited, as i'm not comfortable with it!
minimum wordcount of 3k words!
please be over the age of 15 to join!
make sure to have a discord account, since the majority of communication about the collab will be held in a seperate discord server! who knows, we might even make some new friends in there!
you can post your fics any time before the date of 31st of december! the last drop-out date for the collab is the 30th of october! please make sure to sign up only if you're sure you'll be able to complete the collab! :)
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how to join. send me a message/ask with the member and genre/au you'd like to write for! the genre can be changed later on, but note that once the genre/au you chose is taken, you'll have to think of another one!
once you're added to the collab, please make sure to reblog the collab call post and wait for the link for the collab discord server!
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❥ LEE MARK. the boy next door. | @nakamotos-blog
❥ HUANG RENJUN. my project partner. | @yuroids
❥ LEE JENO. the boy from the coffee shop. | @iceelenemonade
❥ LEE DONGHYUCK. my childhood friend. | @ohmytyong
❥ NA JAEMIN. the boy from the opposite debate team. | @fae-renjun
❥ ZHONG CHENLE. the boy who started a rumor about me. | @rrxnjun (me!)
❥ PARK JISUNG.
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if you have any further questions about the collab, don't be afraid to message me!
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sensitively-taken · 2 years
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“Because sometimes you need to have nightmares to appreciate the dreams.”
– Jay McLean
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HAPPILY NEVER AFTER — AN ENHYPEN, NCT DREAM, & TXT COLLAB
 welcome ! this is a halloween & fantasy collab co-hosted by athena, @soobisms and rin, @karsohn!! :)
| theme :: fractured fairytales and horror. endings do not always end with “always and forever” and most definitely not without at least any kind of dark truth. take your favourite fairytale, tall story, or fable and twist it into a tale you’d never want to listen to as a bedtime story. it can either be the full story’s plot or a key scene from the tale! ✧
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 — RULES & GUIDELINES!
1. this collab is open for enhypen, nct dream, and txt writers on a first-come, first-serve basis (there are 17 slots available as we’re both participating). at first, each writer will only be allowed a slot each so as many people as possible can apply, but if there are still free slots after some time, you can choose to write for a second idol!
2. this goes without saying, but plagiarism is not allowed at all. if you take any inspiration from any other works of media, beside the fairytale you choose to use, you must credit it/them for inspiration. if you need any clarification on how we want you to credit, please message us.
additionally, if it comes to our attention that any writer part of this collab has plagiarised in the past/is plagiarising, they will be promptly removed from the collab.
3. only member x reader or member x oc pairings are allowed.
fem!reader, gn!reader, & masc!reader are all welcome! for any other specified reader (black!reader, south asian!reader, etc), please DM either of the hosts for further clarification.
for member x reader pairings, please ensure your reader is as inclusive as possible! avoid specifying features/actions that may not apply to everyone, unless it is specific to the reader your work specifies. here is an inclusion guide, in case any further clarification is needed!
4. your work must be a oneshot and have a minimum word count of 1.5k words. if you need help reaching the minimum, you can reach out to anyone in the collab (preferably, in the discord server) to ask for help :)
5. smut/explicit nsfw works are strictly prohibited. we’ve decided to allow non-explicit suggestive content, though it’s still not preferred. (however, enha’s sunoo, jungwon, ni-ki, and dream’s jisung are strictly off-limits for this!) additionally, only 16+ writers are allowed to write suggestive content.
if you need clarification on what we consider explicit content, feel free to reach out to us (preferably, in the discord server) to ask!
6. as this is a halloween collab, the deadline is october 31st, 2022 and the final drop-out date is september 30th, 2022. your work may be posted at any time between the final drop-out date and the deadline.
however, if for any urgent reason(s), you cannot meet the deadline but don’t wish to drop out of the collab, please reach out to either of the hosts ASAP, so we’re informed & can work something out with you! :)
7. since there will be horror themes, as well as potential other graphic details in your works, please make sure to disclaim ALL warnings at the start of your piece.
additionally, all information regarding your work (pairing(s), genre(s), warning(s), summary/synopsis, & word count) must be at the start of your work & a read more should be placed after (no more than) 500 words.
8. you must also be at least 14 years of age to join the collab due to said themes.
we don’t really expect this to happen honestly, but please do not lie about your age just to join the collab :)
additionally, you must be, at least, 14 at the time of applying, so if you’re currently 13 but you’ll be 14 before the deadline, please wait until you’ve turned 14 to apply!
9. when you post your work, don’t forget to tag both of us and use the tag #happilyneveraftercollab!
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 — APPLICATIONS!
1. to join, DM either athena ( @soobisms ) or rin ( @karsohn ) with your member of choice and a fairytale you’d like to fracture. please note that fairytales can only be repeated twice!
if you do not have a fairytale in mind yet, you can decide on one later. however, we would advise you to have a fairytale in mind before joining, so you can claim it first!
you can easily search online different fairytales you may use! do not feel limited to the readapted fairytales disney had remade; check out other Grimm’s fairytales!
2. please have a discord account, or be able to make one, as all further communication & clarification will occur in the collab’s discord server.
3. reblog this post once you’re accepted to spread the word of the collab!
4. once you’ve been accepted, you’ll be added to the slots below with your desired member and fairytale & invited to the discord server for further discussions!
5. for logistical purposes, please inform either of the hosts of any changes you may make (url changes, pseudo changes, deactivations, etc)!
6. enjoy!
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 — AVAILABLE SLOTS!
ENHYPEN (0/7)
heeseung — @decembermoonskz — The King’s Son Who Feared Nothing
jay — @koishua — Hansel and Gretel
jake — @karsohn — The Three Snake Leaves Tale
sunghoon — @pshflrts — The Robber Bridegroom
sunoo — @rubysluvbot — Hansel and Gretel
jungwon — @chiyuv — The Peony Lantern
ni-ki — @darkhoonalter — The Little Prince
NCT DREAM (0/7)
mark — @seoulbinz — Godfather Death
renjun — @kp0p10v3r2​ — Mulan
jeno — @127-mile — Les Dons/Fairy Gifts
haechan — @treasuretaeil — The Little Mermaid
jaemin — @jenotapes — Little Red Riding Hood
chenle — @effulgentfireflies​ — The Midas Touch
jisung — @fae-renjun — Rapunzel
TXT (0/5)
yeonjun — @juunnies — Peter Pan
soobin — @soobisms — fairytale tbd
beomgyu — @writingmochi — Cinderella
taehyun — @dat-town — The Fox Sister
heuning kai — @sweetrainwrites — The People of the Sea
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copyright 2022 soobisms & karsohn, all rights reserved.
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svhnflwr · 2 years
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%! next steps event
an anniversary + 100 follower req & collab event
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??? : in honour to celebrate reaching 100 followers and the one year anniversary to this blog, which are two milestones for me, this event encapsulates just that, but in a more romantic light. the theme centres around relationship milestones for this request event and collab !!
what is a relationship milestone?
a moment or event in the relationship that shows the strengthening or development of the relationship. this can also include small moments to celebrate within the relationship <3
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— rules + guidelines
REQUEST EVENT
simply send me:
a prompt of your choice from the list under the cut
an idol from tbz, nct, ateez, or enhypen
and i will essentially fulfill your request and write you a drabble!
keep in mind you must be a follower to choose this option and request off anon
slot based bc I dont want to burn out lol and save some prompts for the collab
SLOTS OPEN [4]
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NEXT STEPS COLLAB
open collab for tbz and nct for writers 14+
member repeats are allowed! you may write for a secondary member with a different prompt if you want
sfw preferred ! i will be 18 in a month so i will allow nsfw submissions after august. nsfw content is completely prohibited for chenji and sungchan. suggestive content is allowed for writers 16+ only and obviously nsfw for 18+
you can either choose a prompt from the list under the cut or have one (or two) of your own approved by me. remember the theme of relationship milestones ! prompts are first come first serve
must be a oneshot and at least 500 words
only member x reader and member x oc allowed
make sure to include all necessary information at the start of your work (warnings, genres, word count, pairing, etc.) especially important for nsfw pieces
feel free to elaborate as much or as little as you want. doesnt need to be standard slice of life style, heck make them the last people in the world and saying ily (you may use this if you want lol)
apply by messaging me or leaving an ask with your idol + prompt
after being accepted, reblog this post to spread the word ! you will also be given a disc server link (not mandatory)
you may post your work anytime you're done and make sure to tag me and use the tag #nextstepscollab
DEADLINE: DEC 31ST, 2022
latest dropout date: nov 30th, 2022
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— relationship milestones prompt list
when a prompt is taken it will be removed from the list
first kiss
first date
first hug
first cuddle session
first time showing pda
first time making out
first holiday together
farting in front of each other
adopting a pet together
getting a plant together
meeting each other's friends
meeting each other's parents/family
saying "i love you"
having sex for the first time
giving gifts to each other
giving each other pet names
calling each other pet names in front of others
first time traveling together
proposing
getting the parents' blessing for marriage
a wedding
honeymoon trip
making up after your first argument
having a conversation about boundaries
deep talks
having a key to each other's houses
staying the night
sharing phone pass codes
moving in together/buying a home
making your relationship public (facebook status, idol!au announcement, etc.)
realizing they are "the one"
letting them take drunk you home safely
getting matching couple thing (matching phone cases, etc.)
if you have other prompts you'd like to write about, just msg me!
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masterlist for the collab can be found HERE
— thank you for joining ♡
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daegall · 2 years
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ok but tell me honestly,,, (esp if you're an experienced writer!!!) would you really genuinely join a collab still?
like they were the rave back when i started writing there were so many left and right and it was just so exciting but when it came to the task at hand,,, it was pretty damn hard
and after joining some, knowing what it's like, how hard it is to come up with a plot and all, i honestly dont know if anyone would join?? if you get what i mean
like let's say the concept sounds fun to you (felt like this a lot when i joined some) would you want to write, or read? bc i hadn't noticed back then, but those are the type of concepts i'd LOVE to read, but not write so
I LITERALLY DONT KNOW WHERE IM GOING WITH THTIS MY MIND IS SO JUMBLEDD UP RN BUT YEAH PLS TELL ME
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heartj4yn0 · 2 years
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updates on heartj4yn0!
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✎...april 6th, 2022
7wtsily:
hi hearties!!
i'm back after so long~~~! i've been feeling ill so i haven't had the time to be on tumblr and writing (but sometimes i do lurk around my notifications! 👀👀) so 7wtsily has been moved back from first week fo april 2022 to just the month of april 2022 which means there will be no specific dates for the works to be posted- a surprise to look forward to!
collab still open!
masterlist!
taglist!
see you soon hearties!!!
love,
heartj4yn0.
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tagging some luvs <3
@markedown , @crazyczennie & @cherryjaebomb !
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ohmytyong · 1 year
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spin the bottle
part of @rrxnjun 's "the crush chronicles" collab
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PAIRING: childhood friend!donghyuck x female!reader (side pairing: friend!yangyang x friend!karina)
GENRE: college au, childhood friends to lovers, fluff, slightly angsty, coming-of-age, mc and hyuck grow apart and then become friends (or lovers!!) again, best friend!yangyang, best friend!karina, xiaojun and giselle are mentioned a couple times
WARNINGS: mentions of food, explicit language, alcohol consumption, mentions and use of drugs, smoking, vomiting, use of pet names (barely lol), probably a bit too fluffy at the end, the side couple is lowkey more interesting than the main couple (oops), super cliché plot line, not proofread (please let me know if i missed anything)
WC: 21,2 k (oops lol)
‣[PLAYLIST]: amusement park by baekhyun, can i call you tonight? by dayglow, on the way by nct dream, fallingforyou by the 1975
SUMMARY: you knew you loved lee donghyuck ever since you met him, when the two of you were little kids. you had become best friends and were practically inseparable. until one day, donghyuck had to leave town and he also had to leave you. however, your feelings for him only grew stronger and stronger and you knew you had to confess to him when you met him again in college. but all this time, you kept suppressing them and you were always left wondering one thing; if he ever loved you back.
A/N: wow i can't believe it's finally here!! i've spent months working on this fic and i can say i'm very proud for actually finishing it. thank you everyone for being excited for it and especially thanks to @rrxnjun and the collab call for giving me the basis for developing this idea <3 enjoy reading this fic and don't forget to give me feedback, it helps me a lot<33
read on wattpad / ao3
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You were five years old when you first fell in love. Or at least you thought you did. You could never know what falling in love meant at such a young age. But that’s how you want to describe it. Because your feelings for him could not be compared to how you felt about other boys. He could not be compared to other boys. That’s why you fell in love with him. But he didn’t fall in love with you. Or if he did, he never showed it.
Loud cheerful screams were the sound echoing in your ears, mixed with the soothing dreamy music coming from the merry-go-round ahead of you. The gate in front of you seemed ginormous in comparison to your small body. Rainbow fairy lights were climbing up the sides of the gate, confetti glued in between each one of them. White balloons were tied to the top and bottom corners of the pillars, leading up to the bright red and gold sign at the top which read ‘Welcome to Dreamland’.
Your eyes were roaming around the place, looking up to the sky and then left and right to the amusement park your mum took you. Soft awes and chuckles left your lips every time you spotted something new. Everything seemed magical in your eyes, the music and the colors transporting your little brain to different dimensions; this was indeed dreamland.
You stopped in front of the merry-go-round and inspected it. The blue, gold and white horses were moving up and down to the rhythm of the music, kids were riding them with cheerful smiles on their faces. You wanted to go there too. You looked at your mother to ask her to get on the merry-go-round. You opened your mouth when-
“Y/n! Y/n!” a cheery voice was calling your name. You stopped to look towards the direction of the sound, only to spot your best friend. “Yangyang!”
You let go of your mother’s hand and sprinted towards him, capturing him into a tight hug. “Wanna go to the horses?” you asked him eagerly.
“Yes! Let’s go” he agreed and your mothers helped you get on the merry-go-round. After all, it was your favorite.
You and Yangyang went on almost every ride of the amusement park. You loved bumper cars, you went on the ferris wheel with your mothers and went on almost twenty rounds on the kids’ roller coaster. You even tried to catch a teddy bear at the claw machines, but you couldn’t get the chance to do so.
After hours of trying all of the amusement park rides, your little stomach started growling and the smell of food everywhere around you only triggered your hunger more. You passed by the food canteens, smelling and taking in all the delicious scents. "What should I choose?" you thought. Just then, you spotted a stand with something strange looking; it was multi-colored fluff on sticks. Cotton candy. You had never seen it before, so you had to try it.
“Mum! I want to try this! It looks like clouds! I want the pink one!”
Your mum agreed and bought you and Yangyang one stick of cotton candy each, while his mum bought you drinks.
You went over to the tables to sit and eat your cotton candy. You sat down on a chair and took a bite. You didn’t know what to expect, but the sugary flavor definitely met those expectations.
“Wow, it tastes so pink! And it feels like the clouds! It's so fluffy!” your mother laughed at your excitement and agreed.
Yangyang was eating his cotton candy too, but he suddenly grabbed your hand and dragged you down the chair. “Let’s go for a walk. Mum, can we go for a walk?” he turned to ask his mother.
His mum shrugged. “Okay, but not too far from here, I want to see you” she said and we left, grinning.
Obviously, you didn’t listen to her. You liked the freedom you had at that moment, so you went strolling through the entire amusement park.
You and Yangyang were holding each other’s hand so that neither of you run away and got lost. Your other hands were holding the cotton candy. You felt so small among the other people and the huge amusement park rides, but you liked it. You felt at ease.
Yangyang let go of your hand and started skipped in front of you. “In the count of three I’ll start running and you will chase after me to catch me!” he said leaving you still.
“No! Yangyang, I can’t run fast!”
Yangyang didn’t listen to you. He smirked instead and started counting. “One, Two. Three!”
“Wait!” you yelled, but he had already run away.
You sighed and started running through the crowd too. You could still spot him in between other people, but you couldn’t run that fast and stumbled when taking longer steps.
Yangyang stopped and turned back to look at you. He smiled and yelled. “Come on, you’re almost there!” and resumed running.
You were breathing heavily, your feet were feeling sore, and you couldn’t move with ease through the crowd. You took a deep breath and gathered all your energy to run as fast as you could. Your only focus was to catch your friend Yangyang, who was now walking backwards looking at you with a smug expression. You had blocked out your surroundings entirely and didn’t notice that another boy was running too. And he was running towards your direction.
Yangyang was now standing, waiting for you to catch him. “I got you!” you shouted before you let out a scream and fell on the ground. The other boy was running fast too, which ended in him bumping into you. Both of you and the other boy fell down on your butts, the cotton candy you were holding was now smashed and dropped on the ground too.
“No! My fluff!” you frowned, tears already forming in the corners of your eyes.
Yangyang was shocked to see you fall. He came over to you to help you get up, smoothening your dress. “Are you okay Y/n? I’m sorry, I didn’t want to get you hurt” he was the one that sounded more hurt.
“It’s okay Yangyang” you reassured him. “But my fluff fell too! I wanted to eat it!” you whined.
Yangyang hugged you. “Don’t worry, we’ll buy a new one."
The other boy steadily stood up by himself. “I’m sorry, I was running too. I didn’t see you.” The boy said, his head lowered.
Neither you or Yangyang responded, so he lifted his head slowly to look at you. “I can buy you cotton candy if you’d like. Sorry” he apologized again.
But you couldn’t speak now either. He looked at you with sorrow eyes, plump lips forming a pout. You took a moment to really look at him. His skin was darker than yours, he was slightly taller than you, his bowl-cut covered his eyebrows, moles on his cheek and neck.
You didn’t know why, but you felt your stomach clench. You cleared your throat and spoke. “Don’t be sorry, I was running too.”
The boy nodded. “My name is Donghyuck. What’s yours?” he asked.
“I’m Y/n and this is my friend Yangyang” you pointed at your friend beside you and he flashed a bright smile to the other boy, Donghyuck.
Donghyuck smiled too and you felt your stomach clench again. “Do you guys want to be friends?” he asked and both you and Yangyang nodded. “Yes let’s be friends! Do you wanna go ride the bumper cars?” Yangyang said and grabbed both yours and Donghyuck's hands.
That’s the first memory you had of him. The first time you saw him, and the first time you've ever felt this weird clenching feeling in your stomach. This was a memory you would always cherish and always remember dearly. But you weren't really sure if he held this memory as close to his heart as you did.
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Beep. Pause. Beep
Why isn’t he picking up the phone? You had called Yangyang three times already. Where is he?
You put your phone in your pocket and grabbed the books you needed for your next class from your locker. As you locked it, an arm linked with yours and dragged you to the corridor.
“Are you ready for this new semester? I heard new students transferred to our department, they might be hot” your best friend Jimin was smirking, wiggling her eyebrows.
“Yeah they might be, but I have a class now and Yangyang isn’t here, I can’t cover up for him on the first day!” you complained.
“Oh come on Y/n, you know how he is. He probably slept in, he’ll be here, don’t worry” she said and you nodded.
You were walking towards your class, greeting a few of your old colleagues on the way. It was your third year of college already, but it still felt like your first day.
You and Jimin parted ways and went to your respective classes. You agreed to meet up later for coffee and lunch, after classes ended.
The amphitheater was almost full; you managed to spot an empty seat at the back of the room and hurried to sit there before someone else took that seat.
You sat down and placed the books on top of the desk. You checked your phone again and saw that Yangyang had now texted you.
[Yangles]
slept in. don’t save me a seat
ttyl :)
Typical Yangyang. You sighed and put your phone aside as the lecture was about to start.
For the next two hours, you couldn’t concentrate on the lecture because of the group of friends chatting behind you. If you were honest, their conversation was a lot more interesting than the lecture.
The girls behind you kept talking about the new students at the computer engineering department. You heard comments such as “oh he is so hot” and “they looked at me and winked”. Oh Jimin is gonna love the tea.
The lecture finally ended and you headed towards the coffee shop in which Jimin asked you to meet her. You sent her a text to let her know you’re on your way. As you were typing the text, suddenly an arm slung around your shoulder. So you let out a loud-ass scream. 
“Guess who’s here!” Yangyang exclaimed, a wide grin plastered across his face, eyes bright, his loud voice a bit too close to your ear. If you ever become deaf, it’s all his fault.
“Oh good morning to you too Yangyang, I’m fine thanks and you?” you said ironically and he rolled his eyes at your comment.
“Cut the ironies bestie, I met Donghyuck earlier” he said and your feet froze and stayed glued right where you were standing.
But you haven’t seen him in years. He moved out of town when you were fifteen, right before high school, because his parents found a better job. He had promised both you and Yangyang that he would call and maybe even visit you whenever he could. And he kept his promise for a while, but after things got tougher with school, his phone calls and occasional visits stopped.
Your stomach clenched. You gulped and removed Yangyang’s arm from your shoulder. “what do you mean Donghyuck is here?”
“I mean that Donghyuck is here” he said, rolling his eyes again, but his tone was serious. “He transferred to the computer engineering department. I came across him on campus and met his friends too. Real cool guys. He asked me about you too.”
“He did?” you regret speaking, because you didn’t expect your voice to come out that shaky.
“Um yeah, why wouldn’t he? He wants us to meet and hang out, just like the good old days. Are you free now?” 
“No, I’m actually meeting Jimin for coffee now. I was texting her before you scared the shit out of me” you said.
Yangyang laughed. “Okay, I’ll see you later then. I’ll tell Hyuck you said hi” he squeezed your cheek and left.
But you were still standing frozen, trying to comprehend what Yangyang just told you. Donghyuck is back. He is back and you couldn’t wait to see him again. So he does remember you. There must be a reason why he didn’t contact you all these years. People’s lives change, right? Does he still look as pretty as he did back then? Does he still care about you as he did back then? All these questions started forming one after the other in your head, but you couldn’t distract yourself from the clenching feeling in your stomach. In fact, these exact questions were to blame for causing you this feeling. 
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You were ten years old when you fell in love again. Not that you ever fell out of love. But at least now you were sure about your feelings. It wasn’t something you had made up; it was rather a confirmation that you had loved him ever since the day you saw him.
You had went to the park with Yangyang and Donghyuck. The three of you decided to do sports in the park; Yangyang took his skateboard with him and Yangyang took his bike. You, however, didn’t take anything with you; you didn’t know how to skate and you certainly didn’t know how to ride a bike. You just wanted to tag along because you had fun spending time with your friends.
But Donghyuck had offered to help you learn how to ride a bike. Yangyang bursted out laughing so hard when Donghyuck said that. “I tried to teach her how to skate once and let me tell you, I wouldn’t even think about teaching her how to ride a bike” Yangyang said.
Yangyang always found his way to make fun of you. He didn’t do it in order to be mean; it was anything but that. He liked teasing you because you would get annoyed and then he would apologize because he felt bad. “I didn’t mean it Y/n” he would say. “I know” you always responded.
But that day Donghyuck was present in this conversation. What you didn’t expect was for him to stand up for you. “Well, in her defense Yangyang” he started “skating is too hard. It needs patience both by the skater and the student. The bike is a bit easier to handle. I think Y/n can do it”.
Every time Donghyuck spoke about you, your stomach clenched. You didn’t know what it was about him that made you feel this way. Was it his eyes? His smile? His honey skin? His soft voice? His kindness and humor? The way he treated you? You didn’t know.
Yangyang agreed with Donghyuck. “You’re right, I didn’t mean what I said. Just so you know. I think you can do this Y/n” he said, his smile fading.
“Don’t apologize Yangles, I know you didn’t mean it” you said and his signature grin appeared on his face again.
You eventually learned how to ride a bike. Donghyuck helped you every time; he taught you how to keep your balance, held you every time you were about to fall and did it every day until you were finally able to do it on your own.
One day he asked you to go to the park to ride your bikes together. Yangyang said he couldn’t come because he felt sick. So it was just you and Donghyuck.
You always felt such comfort with him. He reminded you of a warm summer day in nature. His pure gaze felt like the sun rays hitting your skin, his plump lips seemed to be as soft as the cotton fields, his laugh livelier than the chirping birds. He was comfort himself.
That day the two of you went biking, you couldn’t help but smile at the way you felt. You felt free, independent, powerful. The world surrounding you was in a haze, the only sight you could see was him, the only sound you could hear was his voice.
But sometimes it felt nice not hearing his voice. It meant that he was at peace, and you were too. You had left your bikes standing against a tree and the two of you sat down on the grassy ground to just stare at the sunset. You both loved the sunset.
Donghyuck’s arm was resting on your lower back, his head leaning towards yours, which was resting on his shoulder. Sometimes, when you sat in a position like this, you would try to match your breathing with his. If you were to be honest, you would admit that it was quite hard.
Donghyuck’s gaze was set on the colorful sea of clouds ahead of him, You did the same. He didn’t turn to look at you when he spoke up. “You know, Y/n, at moments like this, I realise how much I enjoy spending time with you. You are truly the best friend I could ever have. I would never leave you, okay?”
The words he uttered at this exact moment confirmed that you sure loved him. More than just a friend. But you could never open up to him about this. He could never know. Not when he wasn’t feeling the same. Not when he didn’t keep his promise.
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Jimin was sitting at a coffee table near the window, sipping from a white plastic cup while texting on her phone. You skipped towards her and sat down on the chair opposite from hers. “Donghyuck is here”.
She put down both her cup and her phone and looked at you with furrowed eyebrows. “What? Don’t tell me he’s one of the transfer students” she said. 
“Well, apparently he is” you said. “Yangyang told me. They’ve already met. Plus, he asked about me”.
Jimin’s bottom lip dropped down to her jaw. “What?” she said again. “Okay, when are we meeting him? I need to have a word with him”.
You laughed at her reaction. “Stop it Jimin, I’m over him now. It’s been years since I had a crush on him.” you said.
“I don’t believe you. You can’t trick me with that. I won’t fall for it.” she said, her tone serious. “I know you dated and all, but you always compared everyone to Donghyuck. You expect me to believe that you moved on?”
You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Whatever” you said.
The two of you paused for a moment before Jimin spoke up. “Do you think he got even hotter?”
You laughed at her comment and playfully slapped her forearm. “Stop it Jimin!”. She was now laughing too. “I don’t know, okay? He might be.” you said.
“Do you want to see him?” Jimin asked you and your eyes shifted down to your lap.
You seriously didn’t know. A part of you wanted to see him, talk to him, hug him and feel him again, ask him about his life and interests, spend time with him. But a part of you was scared; scared that if you saw him, you would fall in love with him again.
“My guess is that you do. Come on, I missed him a bit too” Jimin said and you chuckled. “Now, how about we get you some coffee and you tell me about your day, hm?” Jimin asked and you nodded in agreement.
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The next day Yangyang insisted on picking you up from your dorm and driving you to your classes. He felt bad he missed the first day of the semester so he decided to make up for standing you up by driving you to class. You grabbed your phone to text him and let him know that you were ready but he beat you to it. He was already parked outside the dorm complex waiting for you in his car.
You opened the door from the passenger’s side and got inside the car. “Hey” you greeted him and he did the same, flashing you his signature wide grin.
“Don’t make plans for later. We’re going out tonight. You, me and Donghyuck” he said after he turned on the engine.
 The mention of this specific name took you aback. You muttered a small “okay” and you hoped he heard you the first time so you wouldn’t have to repeat it. “Should I tell Jimin to tag along? She said she would like to hang out all together too” you asked.
Yangyang shrugged. “Yeah sure, I haven’t seen her in a while. Hyuck would love to see her too” he said.
You thanked him for agreeing to invite Jimin and smiled at him. But you couldn’t ignore the clenching feeling that appeared again in your stomach.
Your thoughts carried you away and you didn’t realize you had already arrived at campus. Yangyang parked the car and both of you exited it. You exchanged a short conversation of “see you later” and “text me for any news” and went to your respective classes.
The day went by in a flash. It was already afternoon and you were in your dorm with Jimin, your closet wide open, clothes scattered all over the bed.
You let out a frustrated sigh. “I officially don’t have any clothes” you whined.
“No, you do,” Jimin said, “you’re just nervous. And I don’t even know the reason why, I thought you were over Donghyuck, right?”
“Jimin please, you’re making this even harder!” you whined again.
Jimin got up from the chair and stood in front of your closet. She searched through the racks and the drawers for a while until she stopped and put an outfit on your bed. “Here,” she said, “get dressed. And do it quickly. We’re gonna be late”.
You complied and took the clothes to get dressed. It’s just a meet up with old friends. Nothing to be stressed about. You didn’t have a crush on Donghyuck anymore either. You were probably nervous, or rather excited, because you hadn’t seen him in a long time. Yeah, that’s probably why.
You were supposed to meet Yangyang and Donghyuck at the local diner. Yangyang promised to be there earlier so that you and Jimin wouldn’t have to be the ones to wait for them. You weren’t sure whether you should believe him or not; every time he promises to be early, there’s only gonna appear something on his way to make him late.
Jimin offered to drive the two of you to the diner that you were supposed to meet your friends at. You’ve been to this diner before, you’re going out with your best friends, just a normal night out. But why is your heart beating so hard? Why does it feel like it’s about to rip your chest apart and fly out of your body?
Jimin parked the car in the diner’s parking lot. You spotted Yangyang’s car in the parking lot too, two figures standing beside it. It must be them. It must be him.
“Hello? Are you listening to me?” Jimin waved her hand in front of your face and you quickly snapped out of your thoughts. “I see them, let’s go” she said and exited the car.
You imitate her movements and get out of the car too. Jimin noticed your uneasiness, so she linked her arm with yours and walked with you towards the boys.
Yangyang and Donghyuck seemed to have a conversation about something and didn’t realize you were right there, standing in front of them. “We’re here” Jimin spoke up and the two boys turned their bodies to look at us.
Your gaze immediately fell on the boy that made your heart beat and break at the same time. Black leather jacket hanging from his shoulders, black skinny jeans and boots covering his long legs, comma-styled black hair exposing his forehead. You locked eyes with him, his chocolate ones piercing through yours, plump lips sliding upwards to a wide smile. You swear you saw sparkles in his eyes for a second. Only your heart knew the answer.
“Y/n” Donghyuck breathed out and you returned his smile, before you threw yourself on him and embraced him tightly.
He started laughing. “I missed you so much” he said in your ear and you were thankful he wasn’t able to see your face because your cheeks were almost on fire. “Cute, but I wish I could say the same bitch-ass” you laughed too.
“Oh shut up, you haven’t seen me in years and this is the treatment I get?”.Of course he clapped back. Typical Donghyuck. And right there and then, it felt as if not a single day had passed.
You hugged him tightly. You forgot how comfortable he felt. He had rested his chin in the crook of your neck and you stood on the tips of your toes to do the same. He had definitely grown a bit taller since the last time you saw him. You took a moment to remember his scent, to feel his touch, to hear his voice. And then the clenching feeling was there again.
Yangyang cleared his throat. “Um, we’re here too, you know” he trailed off. You and Donghyuck broke the hug and Donghyuck motioned Yangyang and Jimin to join you in a group hug. Your cheekbones hurt because you were smiling so hard. Your heart fluttered. You were happy.
Yangyang was the first one to break off the hug because he started whining and said he was hungry, so he went inside the diner and invited us in. Donghyuck followed shortly after him, leaving you and Jimin behind. Jimin turned at you and mouthed “girl he’s so hot” and went inside the diner. Typical Jimin, you thought.
Time seemed to have stopped and felt like you were trapped in a loop. Spending time with your favorite people, laughing, talking, reminiscing about the past while making plans for the future. You only stopped the conversations when you had to take a bite from your food or take a sip from your drink. Yangyang didn’t seem to be bothered by that though. 
“So,” Donghyuck started and you shifted your gaze to your drink “are you still dating that guy Y/n?”
Oh he was talking to you. You looked up at him, confused. “Who? Dejun? Well, no, we broke up, like, so long ago” you said.
“Yeah he yeeted his way out to be a model in China or something, honestly who even cares? I almost forgot about him” Yangyang said after he emptied his glass of beer.
Donghyuck chuckled at Yangyang’s remark and went back to eating his food. Jimin kicked you under the table and when you looked at her side, she was smirking.
“Well Yangyang, how about you tell us about your relationship, hm?” you asked him and he choked on his food. He started coughing and Donghyuck patted him on his back to help him breathe.
“Let's not talk about it bestie, okay? I know I fucked up” he said after he caught his breath.
“Why what happened? Donghyuck asked, intrigued.
Jimin was the one who spoke this time. “He's supposed to be dating this girl but he never texts her, calls her or takes her out. Basically he never wants to spend time with her. I seriously don’t know why she hasn’t broken up with him yet”.
Yangyang lowered his eyes. “It’s not like I don’t wanna see her,” he muttered, “but I may or may not have lost feelings and I kinda don’t know how to tell her”.
“Maybe if you weren’t such a coward you would confront her and stop playing with her. It’s that easy you know. Whether you love or don’t love someone anymore, you should tell them before it’s too late” you told him.
“Sounds brave coming from you, Y/n” his response caught you off guard. You threw a piercing glare at him and before you opened your mouth to speak, Jimin spoke over you. “Maybe we should change the topic, what do you think?” she said.
You and Yangyang exchanged a look and focused your attention on your food. Donghyuck chuckled at the interaction between you and your best friend, but he didn’t say anything. 
The rest of the night went on smoothly and you soon forgot about the tension between you and Yangyang from earlier. He was right though. You should consider your own advice sometimes. Why can’t you tell Donghyuck you like him? Why didn’t you tell him when you had the chance to do so? Your feelings for him began to resurface and it was just the first time you saw him after years. You couldn’t let yourself make the same mistake again.
The entire night you and Donghyuck kept throwing hidden glances at each other. You caught him staring at you multiple times and if you were honest with yourself, you did stare at him too. You couldn’t ignore the fact that he looked beautiful. He had always been beautiful.
Your mind, however, was focused on something else, something you wanted to have an answer to. Why did he stop reaching out for you when he left? You needed to know the reason why. He must have had a reason. You tried to push this thought aside and allowed yourself to have a good time. I’ll ask him another time, you thought.
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You were fifteen years old when you had your first kiss. And it was none other than Lee Donghyuck himself who stole it from you. Part of you believed that the reason you were so attached to him even now was because of that day; he gave you your first kiss. But a part of you knew that the kiss was the incident that tied everything together.
Donghyuck announced one day that the company his parents worked in was moving their main offices to a different town, so they had to move away from this place. The same day, you announced to your friend Jimin that you had your first heartbreak. Of course you were going to miss him. A lot. Yangyang was sad too that day. Jimin didn’t know him well enough, but she still felt sad when Donghyuck told you all.
The day before Donghyuck and his family would move away, Yangyang had an idea; to throw a goodbye party for Donghyuck. Donghyuck disagreed and said that a normal hangout with all of us would be just fine, but Yangyang insisted on throwing a party at his place. It will still be just the four of us but a little bit fancier, he had said.
So eventually everyone agreed. The previous day, you and Yangyang went to the shops to buy snacks and some decorations. You were walking around the convenience store aisles when Yangyang finally admitted to his ulterior motives.
“So, Y/n, here’s what we’re gonna do. For the party. I think we should play games but in a more adult way, if you know what I mean” he smirked and wiggled his eyebrows.
You looked at him confused and urged him to continue. “So we’ll play spin the bottle. And before you protest, no we’re not gonna drink anything with alcohol in it because we’re gonna get caught, but it’s gonna be a good excuse for me to kiss Jimin and for you to kiss Donghyuck”.
You stopped walking with a bag of chips in your hands and turned to him. “Are you out of your mind? This cannot happen, ever!” you whisper-shouted at him.
“Oh come on Y/n, don’t be such a party pooper. We both win in the end so what’s the matter?” he whined.
You thought for a few seconds. “They might be uncomfortable and turn down your offer. We want to have fun, remember? Plus, I don’t think Jimin likes you back and Donghyuck certainly doesn’t like me back either” you said and put that bag of chips you were holding into the shopping cart.
“Okay, Jimin might not like me back but I am completely, utterly, absolutely sure that Hyuck likes you” Yangyang said but you ignored him.
As if the odds were against you that day, Jimin and Donghyuck agreed on Yangyang’s suggestion. Jimin wasn’t that fond of the idea of playing spin the bottle at first, but eventually the boys convinced her and she said yes. You had no other choice but to agree too.
You wanted to kiss Donghyuck. You really did. But not in a forced scenario and definitely not in front of Yangyang. You wouldn’t bear his annoying ass teasing you about it for the rest of your life. But this could be my chance to finally confess to him, you thought. But even if you did, nothing would change. He would still leave town the next morning.
Yangyang grabbed the glass of cola you emptied earlier and put it on the ground. You gathered up sitting on the ground too. You looked at Jimin and she smiled at you. “Don’t think about it too much Y/n, it’s just a game”. It wasn’t just a game to you.
Yangyang was the first one to spin the bottle. The empty cola bottle spun for a few seconds, four sets of eyes staring at it with laser rays coming out of them. The bottle started gradually spinning less quickly, until it took three, two, one seconds before it stopped and became still; the top part of the bottle was pointing at Jimin and the bottom part was at Yangyang’s side. “Oh my god Jimin has to kiss you bro” Donghyuck said, smiling.
“This game is bullshit, I don’t wanna do it” Jimin said and crossed her arms. Jimin’s words made Yangyang’s lips drop down to a frown.
“Come on Jimin, it’s just a game, you said it yourself” Donghyuck said. Jimin sighed and leaned towards Yangyang. “Fine, come here then you bitch” she said before she grabbed Yangyan’s jaw and kissed him on the lips. You and Donghyuck stayed still, watching them. Jimin only went in to peck Yangyang, but he went all the way in and kissed her properly. Jimin was quick to react and pulled away from him.. “Ew, don’t do that! We agreed on just a kiss not a full on makeout session. Jeez Yangyang” she said and sat back down at her side.
Yangyang tried to hide the sulk on his face. “I tried to taste your chapstick more, you bitch, but it turns out it tastes awful. What the fuck is this taste?” Yangyang said and wiped his lips with the back of his hand.
“It's vanilla” Jimin said. Yangyang loved vanilla.
The game continued for a couple of rounds and every single time, as if it was its fate, the bottle landed on Jimin and Yangyang. Jimin had already had enough with kissing Yangyang just once, so she suggested that they avoid the kissing part and just hug instead. This went on and on and on until the bottle spun again, going round and round and round until it stopped in three, two, one. But this time, the bottle’s ends were pointing towards two different directions. The bottom part on you, the top part on Donghyuck.
You gulped and looked at him. He seemed calm, relaxed. For him, it was just a game. Sitting there at that moment, looking right into his deep brown eyes, you regretted agreeing to play this game. And you made a mental note to slap Yangyang after all of this was over.
“Now this is getting interesting” Yangyang whispered just loud enough for you to hear him and went over to Jimin's side to sit beside her and watch.
Donghyuck licked his lips and leaned over towards you. You hoped he wouldn't be able to listen to the drumming sounds of your heart or see the embarrassingly vibrant red color on your cheeks. You just went along with it. It’s just a game, right?
Donghyuck was standing a bit too close to you, probably the closest the two of you have been physically. Or rather, the most intimate you’ve been together. He lowered his head to meet your eye level, and came closer to your face just enough so that his lips were grazing over your ear. “Don’t be nervous, it’s just for fun” he whispered to you. Suddenly, this wasn’t just fun anymore.
Donghyuck pulled away from your ear and was now staring deep into your eyes, his face almost attached to yours. He looked at you for a couple of seconds before he gave you a reassuring nod. You didn’t have the energy to say anything, so you gave him a nod too, signaling him that you were fine.
Before you could even process what was about to happen, Donghyuck leaned in and kissed you. Plump lips captured yours in a soft dancing motion, their taste perfectly resembling a mix of the pizza and cola he had earlier. Shock waves run throughout your entire body, as he moved his hand to the back of your neck to support you.
You allowed yourself to fall entirely into him, eyes closed and lips moving along the rhythm he created. A few seconds felt like hours, his homely yet unfamiliar touch making your stomach clench and your face heat up in love.
And then he stopped. Donghyuck pulled back and flashed the brightest smile you had ever seen painted on his beautiful face. He licked his lips and you laughed awkwardly, looking down at your lap to avoid his piercing gaze. Your heart was still beating rapidly. You could taste his lips on your lips, you could feel the touch of his hand in the back of your neck, you could hear the sound of his beating heart, you could sense his cool breath fanning your burning face. Donghyuck had stopped kissing you, but the sensation of his kiss was still present in your entire body. You just had your first kiss, and at the same time, you had your first kiss with Donghyuck.
“Gosh you were kissing for ages. Like, get a room, or something” Yangyang said and went back to sit on the side of the room he was previously sitting in. Jimin threw you a playful wink secretly from the boys. You knew what it meant. We need to talk later type of wink.
It was getting late and Donghyuck’s parents called him to go back home. He needed to leave sooner than the rest of you because he still hadn’t packed all of his things. You greeted him one last time before he walked out the door to leave.
As the door closed, you felt your heart sink down the deepest ocean, a piece of it shattering, tears welling up in the corners of your eyes, dryness in your throat. You missed him already. It had been just a couple of seconds since he walked out the door and your heart to go out that door with him too.
A tear streamed down your cheek.So this was it. A second tear followed shortly after the first one. Then another one. And another one. Soon enough a pool of tears was running down your face and it hadn’t occurred to you that you were going to miss him that much. 
But as if a lightning bolt struck you, you quickly wiped your tears with the palm of your hands, stormed out the door and ran after Donghyuck.
“Donghyuck!” you yelled and he stopped to look back at you. You were lucky he heard your voice, he hadn’t walked that far though, you were quick to react and follow after him, just so you could spend some more time with him. You and him.  “Do you mind if I walk you home?” you asked him and he nodded.
You skipped a bit so that you could walk beside him. You started walking alongside Donghyuck, taking a few seconds to catch your breath until it came back to its normal rate. “So, when are we gonna see you again?” you asked him. He left a low chuckle and shook his head.
“I honestly don’t know, Y/n” he said. Another piece of your heart shattered.
Donghyuck noticed your saddened expression and took your hand in his. "Hey, look at me” he said. You stopped and turned towards him, taking in the details of his face. His chocolate eyes were gleaming under the moonlight, the moles on his dark cheek reminded you of the stars in the night sky.
“I will not forget you. Ever. Always remember that. I will try my best to call you as much as I can, all of you. You guys are my best friends, I could never leave you. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, it won’t be that easy for me to visit you often. but I promise to make up for all the time that we will lose. Especially for you. But I can’t be sure when that will be.”
A tear slipped down your cheek again and he wiped it away with his thumb. Why is he being like this all of a sudden?
Your voice wasn’t strong enough at that moment for you to speak, so you opened your arms to embrace him instead. And he hugged you back so tightly you thought your body would be merged with his. He buried his head at the crook of your neck and you stayed there for a while, feeling the presence of your bodies on each other. Not a single word was said, yet you felt so comfortable and safe in his arms.
That night you had helped him pack his things. You stayed in his room afterwards, talking, laughing, crying. God you were going to miss him. That day, you thought for the first time ever that maybe your feelings were reciprocated. But he said nothing about it. So you didn’t say anything either.
But you wanted to. It felt like all the words were stuck in your throat and there was something blocking them from coming out. I like you Donghyuck, I like you a lot. It was that easy. But for some reason, you couldn’t say it out loud. Maybe you didn’t want to. Maybe you were too scared of rejection. Or maybe you were afraid of losing a friend.
You and Donghyuck were sitting at the stairs of his porch, next to each other, facing the stars of the night sky. You didn’t want to go home. You couldn’t. You wanted to stay there longer, kiss him again, talk to him about anything and then kiss him again.
When you stood up to leave, he hugged you one last time, stroking your hair lightly. He spoke in a low voice in your ear. “I’ll be back. Don’t forget me”.
How could I ever forget you Donghyuck?
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The day after you met Donghyuck at the diner, he texted you and asked to hang out later after your classes. You would be lying to yourself if you said that you didn’t screech like a schoolgirl the moment you saw his text message on your phone when you woke up.
Of course you agreed to meet him. At that moment, you didn’t feel nervous, at all,  but as time passed your stomach was clenching more and more.
Jimin wouldn’t stop nudging you about it the entire day. She wanted to meet up for lunch because she was dying to talk about this ever since you came back home last night. “The first thing he did in the morning was to ask you to hang out later? Yeah, sounds like a date to me” she said.
You rolled your eyes at her. “It's not a date, drop it. He just wants us to hang out, that’s it” you said.
“Are you sure that you want to just hang out though?” she asked you.
You thought for a second. “Well, no, but I won't try to do anything more than that” you said.
“Whatever,” Jimin said “you have to tell him sometime though, you know that right? And you also have to admit to yourself that you never really got over him, so now that he’s here you have to make your move. You had your chance once and you lost it. So don’t lose it again now”.
You sighed. “What if he doesn’t feel the same” you said.
“Who gives a fuck?” Jimin said “If he doesn’t feel the same, you will close this chapter and begin a new one. There are other fish in the sea too, you know”
Yeah but it’s not the same, you whispered to yourself. Jimin didn’t hear you.
As soon as you came back to your dorm, you went straight to searching through your closet for an outfit to wear later, when your phone chimed.
[Hyuck]
meet me at the park in about hour
[Hyuck]
bring your bike too
You were staring at your phone screen until it turned off. Oh he’s such a little bitch, you thought.
You put on comfortable clothes and running shoes, and decided to ride your bike on the way to the park. The sun was beginning to set; orange and pink hues painted the sky, a light chilly breeze combing through your hair. The park was still lively, little kids were playing with each other, old couples were going for walks, some students were studying under the trees.
You hadn’t been to the park since the day Donghyuck left. Yangyang wanted to go skating there from time to time, but every time he asked you to keep him company, you turned down his offer. Then, he started filling his time with dating girls and you started spending more time with Jimin, so the park wasn’t your go-to place to hang out anymore.
You saw Donghyuck leaning against a tree, foot resting on top of the bike’s pedal, same black leather jacket as the day before, a bucket hat hiding his pretty features. He was scrolling through his phone as you approached him.
“Hey” you said and his head shot up, turning off his phone and placing it in his pocket. “Y/n, hi” he said and smiled. You smiled back at him. He looked beautiful when he smiled.
“So, you still like the park, I see” you said. He nodded and hopped on his bike. “I do. So come on, let’s go for a ride. I think we have to catch up on a lot of things. And I promised to make up for all the time we lost. So, let’s go” he said and started riding his bike.
You followed shortly after him until you were now biking beside him. So he does remember his promise, you thought. You smiled to yourself and pushed your thoughts to the back of your mind. You wanted to enjoy your time with him, just like the old times.
You spent hours biking and talking about anything. Donghyuck told you stories from his high school years, the friends he met on the way, how he changed his college major and decided to come back here to study computer engineering.
“A part of me wanted this change because I missed this town, you know? I have so many memories here, I was kinda attached to this place. All I needed was a valid reason to come back, and I found one, so here I am.” he said.
You couldn’t help but bring the same questions to your mind, so you gathered all of your strength and asked him. “Then why didn’t you visit us at all? Or even call us back? You did at first and then you stopped. Why?”
Donghyuck pulled the breaks of his bike and rested his feet on the ground to stop the bike from moving. You mimicked his actions and stood there searching his features for an answer. He cleared his throat and turned to look at you. You couldn’t see his face clearly because the bucket hat was casting a shadow over his features.
“Honestly, I don’t really know. I didn’t want to stop contacting you, but I don’t know why I did it.” He paused for a few moments. He drew in a breath and started again. “You know what, I think I know, but I can’t tell you now. Maybe some other time, okay?” he said.
You were left confused, but decided not to question him any further. Instead, you nodded and smiled at him. He would tell you when he was ready to do so.
The sky was getting darker and darker and both your stomachs growled in hunger. Donghyuck suggested that you buy takeout and sit under at the park to stargaze. You left your bikes leaning against a random tree and put your jackets on the ground to sit on them.
The sky looked beautiful. The stars and the moon were shining brightly, contrasting with the pitch black background of the sky. Donghyuck was staring at the sky when he spoke up “I remember how much you liked watching the sky when you were younger. You were always watching the stars closely and we made bets on which one would fall first.”
You chuckled at the memory. “And you always lost. Every. Single. Time. Seriously, you have no intuition at all. You had won one time and bragged about it forever” you said and he laughed.
He turned his head to face you. He had taken off his hat too, his black hair was falling over his eyes. “You were just lucky all the other times. Don’t flatter yourself” he said.
You sat there and ate your food in silence. Comfortable silence. The only sound that was heard was the singing of the cicadas in the trees and occasionally your munching on the food.
Everything felt at ease again. You and Donghyuck, sitting beside each other, enjoying each other’s company, not having to utter a single word. You were smiling at yourself, it really felt as if not a single day had passed.
Donghyuck looked back at the sky and took a sip from his drink before he addressed you. “You really improved. Biking, I mean. I remember you were still struggling when I left” he said.
“Thanks, I still rode my bike to school so that I could get used to it more. Thank you for teaching me by the way. I don’t think I ever thanked you properly” you said.
“It's no problem” he said and sipped from his drink again.
He opened his mouth to speak again, changing the subject now. “So, why did you break up with that guy? Dejun, was it?” he asked.
Why is he so curious about that? “Oh, there were many reasons actually. He wasn’t a bad guy, he was really cool and I liked him a lot. It’s just that we got kinda bored of each other, I guess? And he also graduated from high school a year earlier than me so then he had to go back to China for college.”
Donghyuck nodded. “I see” he paused and asked again. “How was he like?”
“Why do you even bother so much? He is old news now, anyway” you said. But now you were curious about Donghyuck too. “Tell me about you, did you date anyone in high school?”
You don’t know why but you got anxious waiting for his answer. He shrugged. “Yeah but nothing serious. Just casual things, you know?” he said and you hummed in agreement.
The night went on and you talked more. You and Donghyuck agreed to hang out at the park every day after your classes, like you used to. That’s what he suggested. You couldn’t say no; of course you wanted to spend time with him.
And that’s what you did. You grew closer again, maybe even closer than you used to be. You enjoyed biking and stargazing in the park a lot. It had become your thing; an activity that the two of you shared with each other, an excuse to get away from everyone and everything and make up for all the memories you could have had.
There were quite a few moments when you wanted to look Donghyuck in the eyes and tell him I like you dumbass. But every single time you backed away from doing it. You were too scared that these harmless words would end up destroying everything you had built with him.
So you waited. You waited for the right time to bring it up. You were having the time of your life alongside a dear person that you’ve loved and appreciated your entire life. You were not ready to take the risk and possibly lose him. So you never said a word. Because he didn’t say any words either.
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“Why does Donghyuck keep asking me about Dejun? What is so interesting about him? If he wants to find out more about him, he should be the one to date him” the frustration in your voice made a couple of people turn their heads from the tables next to yours.
Jimin took a fork bite of her carrot cake. “Girl, you must be joking” she said, munching on the piece of cake. “He asks about him because, guess what, he is jealous! J-e-a-l-o-u-s. Got it? Why are you so stupid, gosh! The man has clearly fallen for you and you are so oblivious of it!”.
“I mean why would he be jealous? Dejun and I broke up so long ago” you muttered to yourself.
Jimin heard that and, obviously, she wouldn’t leave it at that. “This is what happens when you like someone. Donghyuck keeps asking you about your ex boyfriend because he wants to make sure he’s in the clear to make a move.”
You sighed. “Is this why you keep asking Yangyang if he broke up with his girlfriend? Look, Jimin, I love you, but I don’t think Hyuck likes me. As a friend, yes. But nothing more than that.”
Jimin gulped down a glass full of water. “Okay, whatever floats your boat, Y/n” she said and took another fork bite of her cake. “So, did Yangyang tell you? A frat guy he knows is hosting a party this weekend, wanna go?” she asked you.
“Come on Jiminie, you know I don’t really do parties” you whined.
Jimin rolled her eyes. “I wasn’t expecting a different answer. But we’re definitely going. There’s gonna be hot boys, good music and lots of alcohol. I heard Donghyuck is going too”.
“Well, he didn’t mention any party” you defended him. “He didn’t mention any party yet” Jimin corrected you. “He's gonna bring it up any second. I bet you can’t say no to him, you care too much about his feelings but you never care about mine” Jimin sulked.
You mentally slapped her only because you couldn’t bear to slap her for real. “I will go to the party because you want us to go, not because Donghyuck will supposedly be there. You know I always come along with you in everything. We come as a package, remember? Now, don’t sulk and eat your cake, we have to think about our outfits” you said. She was your best friend after all, it was the least you could do.
Jimin’s face lit up and her lips curved upwards, stretching all the way to her ears. Before she could open her mouth to speak, you cut her off. “But you have to promise me that you won’t get drunk, okay?” you said and lifted your pinky.
She linked her pinky finger with yours and nodded in agreement. “I don’t exactly promise it, but I’ll try my best” she said.
Donghyuck indeed mentioned the party later that day when you went out at the park with him. “I don’t really wanna go either Y/n, but all my friends are gonna be there. And now that you’re gonna be there too, I can’t be the only one missing out from all the fun” he said.
Donghyuck has had his fun share with parties during high school. He told you so one night at the park. He would sneak out the house and go to parties during weekends, but one night, or rather morning, he went home super drunk and threw up all over the front door rug. He claimed that this happened because of a dare his friends made him do and that he didn’t intend to drink as much as he did. After that, he avoided parties like the plague. It’s not that his parents never allowed him to go again; he could easily sneak out his window. He was smart enough to realize that parties were simply not good for him.
“I wanted to fit in with them, you know?” Donghyuck said “I got used to it eventually and I actually kinda liked it, but now I don’t really enjoy such things”.
That’s one of the many reasons you liked Donghyuck so much. His honesty. He wasn’t afraid to speak his mind about things that bothered him, or simply voice out his thoughts. So why wasn’t he doing it with his feelings too? Was it so hard for him too? Did he actually like you, like Jimin said? Or maybe you just wanted to believe that he did. If he really did, he would probably have said it by now.
But his actions spoke louder than his words. You couldn’t help but think about the way he looked at you under the night sky when you were staring at the stars but he was staring back at you. Or when he wiped your strawberry milk stains from the corners of your lips and his fingers stayed there brushing your lips a little longer than they should be. Or when he held you close to him among big crowds so that he wouldn’t lose you from his sight. Or when he would let you rest your head on his chest while he was stroking your hair so that you could fall asleep faster.
You swear you had heard him whisper something to you once, but when you asked him to repeat it he waved it off. Were you that desperate for his attention? Maybe. But maybe both of you were fools, afraid to let their heart be free because of the painful possibility that it might break.
You and Jimin were standing in front of the frat house door, the loud music blasting through the speakers behind the wall created a throbbing base sound in your ears, your heart beat in sync with the beat of the song that was playing from inside that house.
“Do we knock or...” Jimin trailed off before the door slid wide open and a tipsy young man stood by it. “Welcome ladies, come on in” he said. You and Jimin looked at each other for confirmation before hesitantly taking a step forward. The young man stepped aside so that you could get through the door.
The place was dark, the only source of light being the neon special effects lighting coming from the DJ set. The rooms were packed with people, some of them already drunk, some of them dancing all over each other, the mixed odor of sweat, alcohol and weed making you dizzy. At that exact moment you reminded yourself that this was why you didn’t like parties.
You and Jimin stood there, eyes wandering all over the room, trying to take in the scenery in front of you. “Damn, this is so cool” Jimin breathed out.
The guy who opened the door a few seconds ago was nowhere to be seen. A girl was walking with her sunglasses on, when she bumped into Jimin and spilled a bit of her drink on the ground, a drop of it landing on Jimin’s shoe. A “sorry” was barely audible on top of the loud music and Jimin stood there looking at her shoe in disgust.
“I guess it’s not that cool” she said and grabbed your hand. “Let’s go get ourselves some drinks.”
You walked towards the kitchen which was a bit brighter compared to the other rooms. Bottles of different types of alcohol were lined up on the kitchen counter. Juice boxes, ice and plastic red cups were placed on the kitchen table. A group of boys were refilling their cups with their alcohol of choice, while a couple was making out up against the wall next to the fridge.
Jimin’s disgusted expression from earlier appeared again. You decided to ignore your surroundings and went over to the kitchen counter to grab a drink for you and Jimin.
“Where’s Yangyang?” Jimin asked
“I honestly have no idea. He said he’d text me once he gets here, but I’m a bit surprised he didn’t arrive earlier than us. He doesn’t miss on such things” you said and Jimin nodded.
“And Donghyuck?” she asked again
You put the bottle of alcohol down and grabbed a box of grapefruit juice. You shrugged. “ No idea either.”
Jimin smirked at your answer, but she didn’t say anything. Instead, she took her cup and guided you out of the kitchen towards the living room. “Come on, let’s dance” she said.
The music was blasting into your eardrums and your body caught the rhythm of the music, adjusting its muscles to move along to it. It wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. Your body was swaying to the fast-paced song that the DJ was playing when you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket.
[Hyuck]
where are you?
[Hyuck]
can’t see you
You lifted your head to look around the crowded living room in hopes of finding Donghyuck. It didn’t take you long before you could spot him among the crowd, though. You could never miss him anywhere, he always stood out in your eyes. Your gaze caught his, and his lips curved a bit when he saw you.
He tried to squeeze between the people dancing in the living room in order to get to your place. “What are you looking at?” Jimin asked you when she noticed that something bothered you.
You didn’t have time to answer her, because Donghyuck grabbed your arm to smoothly turn your body around and shift your attention to him. You felt a lump in your throat, your breath trapped inside your lungs. There he stood, messy hair falling onto his eyes, black graphic shirt and jeans, a Cuban link around his neck and matching rings on his fingers contrasting with the dark colors of his outfit. He looked gorgeous.
He flashed you a smile, raising his voice so that you could hear him. “Hi” he said. He simply said hi. Yet a group of butterflies started dancing in your stomach. You said it back.
Jimin got the message and leaned in your ear. “I think I saw some girls I know from one of my classes. I’d better leave you two” she said and turned on her heel to leave.
Donghyuck waved Jimin off and grabbed your hand. He then bent a bit lower and leaned in your ear. “Should we go somewhere quieter?” he asked you, his low voice vibrating in your ear. You could only nod.
Donghyuck walked in the front and you followed behind him, still holding his hand. He led you outside the house, towards the back yard. Plastic cups were scattered all over the grassy ground, two girls passed out beside some bushes, a guy sipping alcohol from a glass bottle and dancing on his own. Yeah, parties were weird.
You felt weirded out and uncomfortable at the sight and Donghyuck sensed it. He squeezed your hand and you looked up at him. He nodded to the large swing beside the barbecue stand and motioned you to go and sit there.
You sat down on the swing and Donghyuck copied your movement. He leaned his body towards the back so that it touched the back of the swing and with a swift motion, he pushed his feet on the ground and the swing started moving. You lifted your feet off the ground and let Donghyuck rock the swing smoothly.
You sat in silence for a moment, that comfortable silence that only existed when you were with Donghyuck, which was interrupted by his honey voice. “I don’t like parties” he simply said.
You turned to look at him but he was staring into the void in front of him. “ I have bad memories when it comes to parties” he said.
You didn’t speak. You didn’t want to. You always let him open up to you without interrupting his stream of thoughts.
Donghyuck drew in a sharp breath. “Remember that story I told you about that party? That one when I went home the next day and threw up all over the door? Yeah that one. I couldn’t bear going to something like this again when the last time I did, I didn’t even do it for myself. Did you know that I started drinking so that kids at my new school thought I was cool? That’s how I ended up spilling my guts all over my mother’s rug.”
He turned to look at you. “Pretty disgusting, huh?” he chuckled.
You chuckled too. You lowered your gaze to your feet. “Then why did you come here tonight?” you asked him.
“I don’t know” he said without even thinking about his answer. “I guess I came for my friends again.“ He paused for a second and spoke again “And I guess I also came to see you, mostly” he trailed off.
You stilled at his words and you thanked yourself for staring at your shoes and not looking at him, because he would be able to see the embarrassingly bright red color of your cheeks.
“But you see me everyday. We hang out all the time” you said.
“I know” he said. That’s all he said. What was that even supposed to mean?
Before you could speak, Donghyuck got up from the swing and extended his arm in front of you. “Come on, let's get out of here. This party sucks, we both hate it, so why waste our time? Let’s leave. Me and you.” he said.
You looked up at him. “Hyuck,” you trailed off “as much as I hate this party and as much as I want to leave with you, I promised Jimin to keep her company” you really hated that you had to say this.
“Jimin has found other people to hang out with, she’ll be fine, I know it.” Donghyuck said, a glimpse of hope in the tone of his voice.
That glimpse vanished when you rejected his offer for the second time, the corners of his mouth dropping to a frown. “I’m sorry Hyuck, I can’t” you said.
Donghyuck nodded to himself and put his hands inside his pockets. He cleared his throat but his voice still came out a bit raspy and low. “It’s okay, I get it.”
Your heart shuttered upon seeing him like this. You really didn’t want to make him feel bad, but you had also promised Jimin to be there for her since she wanted this so much. And you couldn’t let yourself break that promise, even though it was actually a bit trivial. Because in all honesty, Jimin would really be fine.
But also a small part of you was too flustered to spend time alone with Donghyuck at that moment. You felt as if you weren’t capable of controlling your emotions; your feelings kept growing stronger and stronger, and his presence alone was enough to make you feel overwhelmed with love.
The back door opened and someone came running through it. “Donghyuck, dude!” a guy you didn’t quite recognize yelled and came to grab Donghyuck by his arm. “You’re missing out on all the fuuuun my dude, come in back insideeee we’re gonna get fucking wasted!” the guy was yelling and patting Donghyuck on the back of his neck while dragging him inside the frat house.
Donghyuck said something you didn’t quite catch, and he tried to let go of the guy’s hold on him, but he failed to do so. The guy had already taken him to the back door and inside the house.
The door closed shut behind them and you left sitting on the swing by yourself, rocking it slightly with your feet. You shivered under the cool evening breeze and wrapped your arms around your body to shield yourself from the cold.
You didn’t want to go back inside. You promised Jimin to keep her company, but a frat party was the last place you wanted to be at, at that time. You grabbed your phone and, speaking of the devil, a few texts from Jimin appeared on your screen.
[Jiminie]
spotted yangyang. pretty sure he took a girl to a room
[Jiminie]
doesn’t he a gf?
You sighed reading Jimin’s texts. You really had to have a talk with Yangyang. And Jimin, for that matter. At least you knew that he was safe and that you probably won’t have to take care of him like a baby after you leave the party.
[you]
let him be, we’ll kick his ass tomorrow
[you]
where are you?
The text you wrote was delivered for the next 15 minutes. Jimin hadn’t read your message. All of a sudden, your hands became sweaty and your chest felt heavy as if a rock had fallen onto it.
Why didn’t she text me back?
Worry started welling up inside you and you rushed inside the house looking for your best friend. The music had got louder, the crowd was bigger, the smell of alcohol and weed more prominent. You went running up and down the stairs, kicking open every single door you found on your way.
Still, Jimin was nowhere to be found.
You stood at the edge of the stairway for a second to catch your breath. You opened your phone to call her and started walking towards the bathroom, the last room you didn’t check.
The phone was beeping in your ear, but Jimin didn’t pick up. You exhaled sharply and opened the bathroom door, still holding the phone in your ear. The sweat on your palms and the rock on your chest magically disappeared when you saw Jimin kneeling in front of the toilet with an arm holding her hair back out of her face.
A sigh of relief escaped your lips and you stopped the phone call. “Thank god you’re safe. I was so freaked out you bitch” you said and crouched down beside her. “Are you okay?” you asked her.
Jimin nodded and let her hair fall down her shoulders. She wiped her lips with the back of her palm before she spoke. “I’m okay. I had a bit too much alcohol and I threw up. But I feel better now. Sorry for making you worried” she said.
You opened your arms and she fell into your embrace. You stroked her head lightly, as you could feel her warm tears wetting the fabric of your shirt on your shoulder. She promised not to drink too much, but your gut somehow knew you’d better stay there at the party because something like this would be inevitable. “It's okay Jiminie, I was the one who left you alone, I promised to keep you company” you said.
She pulled back from the hug. “I guess we both broke each other’s promise” she chuckled and you did the same.
Jimin sniffled and wiped her already dry tears. “Why are you alone? Where is Donghyuck?” she asked you.
“We were sitting outside but then a random guy came and dragged him back inside. He seemed pretty wasted” you replied.
Jimin’s eyes widened and she stood up abruptly. “Oh no, oh no no no” she said.
You stood up too. “What? Jimin, what's wrong?” you asked her curiously.
“If it's the guy I think it is, then Donghyuck might be stupid drunk right now, or even worse, under the influence. We need to find him. Now” she said and ran out the bathroom and down the stairs, skipping a couple of steps while doing so.
You followed right after her, the rock falling on your chest again. You hated parties. This was final. Things like this are unavoidable in parties, and you hated the fact that your friends had to go through shit every single time.
The music wasn’t as loud as earlier and the living room didn’t feel as crowded. Most of the people were gathered outside in the backyard, or were already passed out on the beds or the floors of the bedrooms.
You and Jimin spotted a group of people gathered in a circle in the middle of the living room. Everybody was sitting on the carpeted floor, bottles of alcohol scattered everywhere around them. You noticed that a guy was holding a blunt and kept rotating it to every person gathered in that circle. Oh no. 
Their voices were mixed in with the music coming from the DJ set, so all you could see was their mouths moving without saying anything meaningful. The smoke of the blunt made the living room foggy and your lungs were struggling to work properly in between the crowded room.
The stinging sensation in your eyes caused by the smoke and flashing lights made your eyes watery and you could not tell apart any face in the crowd, except for Jimin who was standing next to you.
“What the fuck is going on in here?” Jimin whispered.
You rubbed your eyes in order to clear your vision without even caring if this would ruin your makeup. The faces on the people sitting on the floor became clearer, and it didn’t take you long before you spotted the familiar chocolate eyes looking drowsy, honey fingers placing the blunt in between soft plump lips.
A girl passed Donghyuck the blunt and he took a long and slow drag from it, exhaling the smoke into the thick air creating smoke rings. He then gave the blunt to the person next to him and he leaned back supporting his body with his elbows.
Donghyuck was wasted. Whatever that guy did to him in such a little time got to him immediately. His chocolate eyes were drowned in a pool of red, his hair looking messier than before and his clothes were all wrinkled.
You stood there frozen looking at him. If you had tried to keep him away from that guy, he wouldn’t have ended up in this situation. He had told you that he was pressured by other people to do stuff he didn’t want to do, but was he that naive to let this happen to himself once again? How many times has that even happened before? 
Your thoughts had carried you away, your vision was blurry again and your ears had blocked away all the sounds. An arm slung around your shoulders and you jolted up at the sudden touch.
“Where have you been bestie? You came rrright at the perfect time. We’re playing spin the bottle” Yangnyang said drowsily, his eyes painted in the same red shade as Donghyuck’s.
“Oh you’re here too, come on, sit down” he said to Jimin and dragged us both to the circle on the floor. He used both his arms and his full force to sit us down next to each other, and then he got up to sit across from us where he was previously sitting.
The girl to your left offered you the blunt but you rejected it without a second thought. Everyone was either stupid high or stupid drunk, some of them were both. You were suffocating. You felt like a total stranger there, even the existence of your own body was making you anxious.
You turned to Jimin on your right. “We need to go home” you mouthed and she kept nodding to herself constantly.
Your eyes roamed around the small circle, trying to find a way to get up and leave. But before you could do that, the chocolate pair of eyes that was now drowned in deep red, locked in with yours. A sense of déjà vu ran through your entire body, shivering under his gaze. This cannot happen again.
Jimin took your hand in hers and squeezed it tightly. She was uncomfortable and so were you. You tried to get up and leave, but the girl next to you dragged you back down.
A guy gulped down an entire bottle of alcohol before he put it down in the middle of the circle. You didn’t even bother to look at what type of alcohol it was.
Yangyang moved in closer to the middle and grabbed the bottle. “Alright, I'll go first!” he shouted and with a swift motion, he spun the bottle fast.
The bottle was spinning at a rapid speed until it came to a stop, its two ends pointing on two people you didn’t know. Apparently, you were the only one who didn’t know them because everyone else was super excited for their kiss. Or at least they were too high to understand what they were doing.
The bottle spun again. And again. And again. You lost count of how many rounds you were in, the same way your eyes were lost in Donghyuck’s. You kept him under your gaze, watching his every move and trying to justify the way he was acting. You had never seen him like this, so out of himself. What happened to the boy you saw a couple hours ago? The boy you knew ever since you were five? It felt as if he had almost lost whatever it was that made him different from the others. Right now, he looked like every other frat boy in that house.
But he didn’t really look at you. In fact, his mind seemed to be roaming around, not really paying attention to any of his surroundings except for when someone would pass him the blunt.
The bottle kept spinning and almost everyone had kissed someone else at this point. Yangyang took his fair share of the game as he kept on kissing a different girl in almost every single round.
Jimin squeezed your hand again and you realized how uncomfortable she might have felt. This time, you wouldn’t let any of the others stop you from leaving. Your friend wasn’t feeling well, but so were you. So you let go of Jimin’s hand and stood up, ready to leave.
As if fate was against you, you heard a burst of cheers and whistles coming from everyone gathered in the room. You regretted not leaving sooner, because the one end of the bottle was pointing at your side. And the other end was pointing at Donghyuck.
Cold sweat ran down your temples and a tight knot appeared in your stomach. This can’t be. You froze there standing still, staring at the bottle on your feet. You lifted your gaze from your feet to meet Donghyuck’s, who was staring back at you with a smug expression painting his face. From the corner of your eye, you could spot Yangyang grinning like a madman, his entire dentition on full display.
As if he did it on purpose, Donghyuck took a long drag of the blunt before standing up too so that his eyes leveled yours. The smugness on his face never left his features, his drowsy red eyes pouring into yours.
He slowly walked towards you, stopping right in front of your standing figure. His face was now way too close to yours. You could smell the alcohol and God knows what else on his breath, the heat of his body radiating to yours.
Donghyuck parted his lips and your breath got caught in your throat. His body somehow got even closer to yours. He tilted his head to the side and leaned against your ear. His hot breath was fanning over your ear, his lips softly grazing your skin. With a voice hoarse and low, he spoke loud enough for you to barely hear him. “Don’t worry sweetheart, we’ve done this before.”
You hadn’t even noticed which end of the bottle was pointing at you, but Donghyuck took the initiative himself and smacked his plump lips onto yours. His touch caught you off guard. You were standing there doing nothing, while Donghyuck placed both of his hands on the sides of your neck, his lips moving aggressively yet smoothly on top of yours.
You waited for him to pull away so that you could leave the party as soon as possible, but his intentions seemed to be different. He bit on your bottom lip in an attempt to part your lips so that you could kiss him back. You hated to admit it to yourself but it definitely worked. You parted your mouth just enough and moved your lips in sync with his smooth plump ones, the taste of alcohol from his lips transfering to yours.
The knot on your stomach kept on tightening more and more with each second passing. Your pulse rate had reached an infinite number of beats per minute and you were sure that your legs would not be able to hold you for much longer.
As if Donghyuck read your mind, he pulled away after leaving a last soft peck on your lips, removing his hands from the sides of your neck. He pulled back smirking at you as you were still standing frozen, your lips still feeling numb and swollen.. 
You had blocked away everyone else that was around you. You couldn’t hear anything of what they were saying. Your brain was still trying to comprehend what had just happened.
With a quick snap back to reality, you grabbed Jimin’s hand and turned your back to everyone else, storming off through the door of the frat house.
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The night of the party you slept over at Jimin’s dorm. As soon as you exited the frat house, you went straight to Jimin’s car and you offered to drive since Jimin wasn’t in the right place to drive. She was still feeling unwell after she threw up all the alcohol she had consumed previously the same night, so you wanted to make sure she would be fine. But honestly, you weren’t feeling well either, and it wasn’t because you had drank.
Your mind kept replaying the moment Donghyuck kissed you like a video on loop. You were suddenly fifteen again, playing a silly game of spin the bottle with your friends where you happened to kiss your silly little crush. But now it happened again. And it wasn’t a silly game or a silly crush anymore.
Why was Donghyuck so complicating? All those times you hung out together, you never noticed him having any romantic intentions towards you. Everything he did or said was purely in the terms of friendship. But the way he approached you, touched you and kissed you at the party told you otherwise. Were you that blind not to notice his intentions?
You tried to excuse his behavior, saying that he was high or drunk and didn’t know what he was doing. Which is not necessarily a lie. It wasn’t his fault that he got peer pressured into drinking and behaving like one of the frat boys. He is the complete opposite of a troublemaker and ill-intended person; no wonder people found it so easy to talk him into things. 
Plus, it was only just a game. He sure didn’t think of it as something much of a big deal, so why would you give it so much importance? 
You mentally slapped yourself for thinking like this, because Jimin, who was already fast asleep, would yell at you for excusing Donghyuck’s behavior. He’s not a kid, he’s a grown-up, he knows what he’s doing, she would say. You had to wait until the morning to hear her scolding. The thing is, she wouldn’t be completely wrong about this.
During the thunderstorm of thoughts pouring inside your brain, a bold lightning struck in between. What if you confessed to him? Your heart couldn’t bear hiding what it felt for any longer. At that moment, you didn’t care if it would ruin your relationship with Donghyuck. He has acted recklessly enough quite a few times now, so you were allowed to be reckless for once too. He had to know how you felt, because this is what would make you feel at ease with yourself. He can’t find it so easy to kiss you in a drunk game and not feel anything either. After the spark that lit up with the touch of your lips and the butterflies that danced around the knot in your stomach, you knew you had to tell him. But the problem was that you didn’t know how to do it. 
For the meantime, you had curled up in Jimin’s bed hugging yourself tightly, crying your eyes out until sweet sleep brushed over them and closed them shut.
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The morning of the next day you and Jimin went out to grab breakfast together. She was still feeling a bit weird because of last night’s events, but she said that a plate of chocolate chip pancakes would cure her hangover.
You were fiddling with your fork, scraping it at the surface of the plate, a screeching noise coming from it. Jimin visibly shivered at the sound and you stopped it.
“So,” Jimin began, swallowing a big piece of the pancakes, “wanna talk about last night?” she asked.
You put your fork down and sat back, crossing your arms. “I don’t think there’s anything to talk about. Everything is so confusing” you answered.
“Um, that’s exactly why we need to talk about it” Jimin said. She drank a full glass of water and then set it down on the table with a thud. It was so loud, you thought that the table might have broken.
“Donghyuck literally kissed you and we’re gonna completely ignore that? Come on Y/n, we cannot pretend it didn’t happen. Well, at least you cannot pretend it didn’t happen” Jimin said.
“Drop it Jimin, he was drunk, or high, or whatever.”
“No he was not. Well he was, but not that much. He knew what he was doing. Look, Y/n, Donghyuck has been a great friend to you and I know how much you love him for that. But when it comes to the romantic part of your relationship, he’s been nothing but an ass.”
You sighed and didn’t say anything in return. Jimin was right. He really was an ass when it came to romantic relationships. But you couldn’t ignore your feelings. You knew the way you felt when he touched you, when he leaned close to your ear and whispered to you, when his lips danced with yours.
The question is, did he feel the same?
You broke the silence by speaking up. “I think I’m gonna confess to him” you said.
Jimin almost choked on her food. She started coughing and you immediately got up and patted her on her back to prevent any accidents. You filled in her glass with water and helped her drink a bit.
“You what?!” Jimin practically screamed and you were thankful that the restaurant was not full that morning.
“I thought about it last night and I can’t keep suppressing my feelings, But I don’t know how to do it and I still think that Donghyuck might not like me back, hell, he only sees my as a friend, but at the same time I felt it when he kissed me, it felt different than the first time he did it back at that goodbye party before high school and God I hate parties becau-“
“Hey hey hey! Calm down bestie” Jimin interrupted you. You were panting, trying to catch your breath. You didn’t realize you went on an auto-rant mode until after Jimin spoke.
“It’s okay, I know it’s hard to do it. But if you finally feel confident enough to tell him, you should do it. We’ll think of a way to do that, together.” Jimin reassured you and you nodded to yourself.
Speaking of the devil, your phone screen lit up and a ting sound echoed in the room. You picked it up, only to see a text from Donghyuck.
[Hyuck]
see you at the park later?
You sighed again and made a mental note to text him back in a minute when you would have calmed down from your previous outbreak.
You really had to tell him, and you had to do it soon.
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Despite your initial denial, you agreed to meet Donghyuck later that day at the park, at your usual spot. You were contemplating whether to meet him or not, because even though you wanted to confess, your anxiety and fear of a bad outcome got the best of you. 
You didn’t mind if you got rejected. You really didn’t care at all. At that moment, you just wanted to get it out of your chest. A few weeks ago, you would be dreading the possibility of Donghyuck rejecting your feelings and ruining your friendship. But right now you had none of that in mind.
You rode your bike on the way to the park in order to clear your mind with some fresh air. The sun had almost set and the park was becoming emptier. You spotted Donghyuck sitting on the ground with his back resting on a tree trunk. He had rode there on his bike too.
You went up to him and he only noticed your presence until after you sat down beside him. He turned his head to your side and he flushed you one of his precious bright smiles, the one that always made your heart skip a bit.
You didn’t want to lie to yourself, but your confidence from earlier magically vanished the moment you saw his face.
“How have you been? It was a mess last night” you spoke first and his smile dropped at the sound of your voice, his plump lips forming a soft frown, eyes falling down to his lap.
“Don’t remind me of that” Donghyuck said. He paused for a second before he spoke again. “I actually wanted to apologize for that. For whatever happened. I clearly didn’t mean anything I did or said, so if I did anything bad or weird, don’t tell me. I don’t wanna know. I promised myself I wouldn’t get carried away, but guess what! I did nothing but that. I’m sorry.”
You waited for him to finish with what he wanted to say before you said anything else. You went closer to him and rubbed his back in sympathy.
It took you a while to take in everything he said. What did he mean by “I didn’t mean anything I said or did”? Did he regret kissing you? Didn’t he feel the same spark, the same tingle, the same knot in his stomach?
You tried to push these thoughts away and focus on your feelings. It was time you put your feelings first, or rather, yourself. Your heart was beating out of your chest, blood rushing into your cheeks, as you gathered all your confidence and courage before you spoke up.
“Donghyuck?” you said in a soft, quiet voice, barely above a whisper. Donghyuck lifted his head, his chocolate eyes diving deep into yours, his skin glimmering under the moonlight like frozen honey.
That’s when your voice got stuck in your throat, and you stood there staring at him and he was staring back at you. “Wanna go on a ride with our bikes? To clear our minds?” you said.
He nodded and his plump lips curved upwards, his eyes creasing a bit on the sides. This is not what you wanted to say, but at least you said something.
You wanted to say so much more. So many things occupied the back of your head, you wanted to scream at him for giving you all these mixed signals, you wanted to scold him for acting so immature, you wanted to hug him and tell him that he’s too good for this world, you wanted to feel his touch and warmth on your body. But you did nothing for it.
You had to think of a way to confess to him without having to say any words. Otherwise, you would fuck up. Or you wouldn’t be able to do it at all, and you would be left with the burden upon your chest.
In the meantime, you were reminded how beautiful you felt every time you were with him. You relaxed, you laughed, you cried, you smiled, you frowned, you were stressed and then you were not. There was only one boy in all the world that could wake up every single emotion inside you and that boy was none other than Lee Donghyuck.
You still quite couldn’t put your finger on what it was that made him so different from the other boys. Maybe the fact that he was just a guy, like everyone else, but he seemed so gorgeous in your eyes. Maybe it was because you knew him in a way no one else did. That’s why you felt the need to share your feelings with him, because no matter what, you somehow knew that he would always love you back, even as just a friend. 
You were still mad at him for acting this way. But you could not completely ignore the person you knew because of one reckless incident. You knew Donghyuck very well, and you knew that he was better than this. You weren’t in the right mood to confront him after seeing how bad he felt with himself, so you chose to put whatever happened at the party towards the back of your head for a while and enjoy your time with him.
There is always the right time for everything.
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“Aeri broke up with me” Yangyang announced, with a frown on his face that could reach the floor.
“She did? Yeah, I’m not surprised. You shouldn’t be either” you said.
“But why?” Yangyang whined.
“Are you serious right now?” Jimin spoke up “You literally hook up with every other girl, plus, you never gave her any attention! And you have the audacity to cry about it.”
You were walking on campus, heading towards your respective classes. It had been two days since the frat party, and Yangyang’s girlfriend found out about his doings and she finally snapped.
Donghyuck caught up to you and joined the conversation. “Oof, I found you guys, I was looking for you everywhere. Wait what happened?” he asked as soon as he noticed Yangyang’s frown in his expression.
“Aeri happened” you said.
“Who's Aeri?” Donghyuck asked, furrowing his eyebrows.
Jimin was the one to speak up this time. “Yangyang’s girlfriend. Well, now ex-girlfriend. It took her a bit long to come to her senses but I’m happy she finally did.” She turned to Yangyang and slapped him in the back of his head. “See, you never even mentioned her name, you idiot! You’re gross, honestly” Jimin said with a disgusted expression.
Donghyuck smiled slightly at Jimin’s comment, but none of them saw him but you. Was it just your idea or did he look extra fine today?
Jimin walked to your side and linked her arm with yours. “Now if you will excuse us boys, we have to talk about girl things, mhm?” Jimin said and dragged you away from them, leaving them walking behind you.
“So, I thought of the perfect idea” Jimin whispered, lowering her head.
“About what?” you asked.
“You will make a quiz and send it to him” Jimin said. You stopped at your track to take in what she just said. “What?”
“You want to confess to Donghyuck, right? So I did some research and came across this quiz that you supposedly send to your crush and then they have to respond and send it back to you I guess. What do you think?” Jimin said.
“It sounds childish. Yeah I don’t think it will work” you said.
“But why? Let’s give it a try. Please” Jimin whined and you couldn’t do anything but agree with her. “Okay, listen. I’ll see what I’ll do. If I feel confident enough to send it to him then we’re good, otherwise we’ll have to think of something else” you said.
Jimin screeched and hugged you tightly. “Thank you thank you thank you! Oh my god, I really think it will work. Plus, it’s not gonna be a face to face confession so don’t be nervous about it. You got this. I’ll meet you later after classes to work on it. Love you bestie!” Jimin said and ran off to her class, leaving you walking on your own in the campus.
Maybe her idea wasn’t that bad after all. This couldn’t go too wrong, right?
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Later that day you met Jimin at your favorite café. You found her sitting at your usual table, scrolling on her phone.
Yangyang decided to tag along this time too. You bumped into him on your way out of campus and invited him for coffee too. You didn’t tell Jimin about it, but you were sure she wouldn’t mind.
You sat down next to her, and Yangyang went for the seat on the other side of the table, taking out his phone.
“Let’s start, take out your laptop” Jimin said and you did so. You opened an empty form sheet and stared at the cursor appearing and disappearing on the screen. “Well, how do I start?” you asked.
Jimin took the lead and turned the laptop to her side so that she could type on the keyboard easier. “So, we'll start with his name. Write something like, ‘Hi Donghyuck, if you’re receiving this it’s because I have a big fat crush on you and I don’t know how to tell you-‘”
“Shhhh,” you interrupted her “don’t say his name” you whisper shouted.
Yangyang raised his head from his phone screen and joined the conversation. “Don’t worry about it bestie, it’s not as if we don’t know about it. It’s so obvious that you like Hyuck to the point it hurts my eyes every time I see you looking at him. Can’t you be more discreet about it? What the fuck are you two even doing by the way?”
You were left speechless and kept blinking, staring at Yangyang. Of course he would figure it out, he’s been your best friend since you were literally babies. You shouldn’t be surprised by this.
“We’re making a confession quiz to help Y/n tell Donghyuck that she likes him. I saw it online and apparently it works wonders” Jimin said.
Yangyang stayed silent for a few seconds before he started laughing hysterically. You and Jimin looked at each other and then back at Yangyang, waiting for him to stop with his laughing outburst. 
You waited until he finally caught his breath, wiping a tear that slipped from the corner of his eye with his finger. “You guys are seriously so funny” he said.
“What's so funny about it, Yangyang? Hm?” Jimin asked him.
“I just find it such a stupid idea. Don’t you think it’s a bit childish? It won’t work” he said.
“That's what I thought too, but I’m gonna give it a try” you said.
“Okay, whatever” Yangyang said and went back to scrolling on his phone.
“Don’t give him any notice, Y/n. Let’s move on” Jimin said and started typing on the keyboard.
“So, we'll start with questions such as ‘Did you know that I liked you?’ and ‘If yes, then how did you know?’ and then ‘Do you like me back?’ and stuff” Jimin spoke while typing at the same time.
“Wait Jimin, don’t you think these are a bit too straightforward?” you asked. Jimin stopped typing and looked at you dead in the eye. “Are you kidding me? This is how a confession works, hello?” Jimin answered, full of irony. Through the corner of your eye, you saw Yangyang scoffing.
“Okay so next,” Jimin started typing again “you need to ask him the important stuff, which is what he thinks of you. And that includes what his first impression of you was, how attractive he finds you and how much he likes your personality.”
“How about we ask him something like ‘Is this awkward?’ because trust me, it probably is” you were the one who suggested a question this time.
Jimin wasn’t entirely sure if you were joking or not, be she agreed and typed it after the previous one. “Now, let’s end it with a precious moment between the two of you. One that he remembers, it might be anything” Jimin said.
She typed fast, her fingers running on top of the keyboard. Her eyes never left the screen, following the letters without even peaking at the keyboard to see what she was typing. She then pressed the enter key with all her strength and sat back on her chair. “And we’re done. It’s sent” she said.
The moment she said that the quiz was sent, you started trembling. You didn’t feel nervous up until that point. What if everything went downhill after this? It’s just a stupid quiz, you thought. Sure, the quiz was stupid, but your crush wasn’t. You were worried that once Dongyuck sees the quiz, he’ll start seeing you differently. You were only hoping that this differently didn’t mean negative, because if it did, your entire relationship with him would change. And you didn’t want to lose such an important person in your life over a not-so-stupid crush.
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You didn’t see Donghyuck on campus the next day. You were sure about it because ever since Jimin sent him the confession quiz, he hasn’t left your mind. You kept looking for him everywhere but not because you wanted to see him. It was rather the opposite. You knew that if you saw his face after knowing that you had confessed to him, you wouldn’t be able to utter a single word. You avoided him.
You had to thank him, though, for making your job easier. Not a single sight of him on campus for the entire day. Good news.
But the bad news was that he didn’t text you throughout the day at all, which was odd. He would usually ask to meet at the park, or just text you about not anything of importance. But there was no sign of him that day.
A lot of thoughts formed in your mind at the same time. In the worst case scenario, there was something wrong with him. In the best case scenario, he felt way too awkward because of the confession quiz and he didn’t want to do anything with you. You couldn’t explain how this was the best case scenario, but you were worried sick about him. So you hoped for the latter.
You didn’t want to text him or call him though. You wanted to avoid him, right? Your current behavior didn’t match the confidence you had a couple days ago. It felt like you were more intimate with him now, you had exposed a piece of your inner self and you were scared that your actions would make him feel uncomfortable.
Yet, you decided to give him time. You wanted to wait for his response. Whatever it would be. You thought that your confession would help you ease your mind, but you’ve been thinking about him even more now. What if he didn’t feel the same? Of course, you would respect his feelings. You can’t force people to like you, or love you. But deep down, you knew it would hurt. You would still continue to love him even if he didn’t love you back. You cannot turn on and off feelings like a light switch. Loving him took a long time and getting over him would take even longer. You didn’t want to get over him. You probably couldn’t. So you wanted to keep loving him and hoped that maybe, there was a slight chance that he would love you back.
However, you didn’t see Donghyuck on campus the day after that either. But this time, you didn’t know if it was because you were avoiding him or because he just didn’t come to any of his classes.
Worry washed over you when neither Yangyang or Jimin had heard of him. “I thought he would be talking with you” Yangyang told you. Yeah, you thought the same thing.
After your classes ended for the day, you decided to go by his dorm and see him in person. You still felt like avoiding him but you didn’t have another choice at this point. You wanted to see him.
You put on your earphones and let the music keep you company while walking. Your heart rate was slowly increasing with each step you took, but you couldn’t explain if it was because you felt anxious or because your heart followed the beat of the music.
After listening to a couple of songs, you found yourself standing right outside Donghyuck’s dorm door. Taking off your earphones, you stood there still, waiting. You raised your arm hesitantly, knuckles touching the wooden surface of the door. You slightly pulled your hand away from the door and then your knuckles touched the door again.
Knock. Knock.
You drew a step back, arm falling to your side. And you waited.
One, two, three, four, five, si-
Donghyuck appeared behind the door, wearing a pair of gray sweatpants and a t-shirt, hair messy and eyes droopy.
“Hi, um, sorry d-did I wake you up?” you said.
“Um, no it’s fine, uh, is there something wrong?” Donghyuck said, rubbing his eye with his fingers.
And then you noticed the flush color painting his cheeks and the way he kept his eyes on the ground, not trying to maintain eye contact.
“I was just worried, you know? We haven’t seen you in two days and I just wanted to see if you-“
“I’m fine Y/n, there’s nothing to worry about, now please, I was in the middle of something so, uh, I’ll see you later, bye” Donghyuck interrupted you and closed the door right in your face, without even sparing you a glance.
What was this all about? Why was he acting like this?
You blinked away the tears that were forming in the corners of your eyes and walked away.
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“Girl, you’re not the one avoiding him, he’s the one avoiding you!” Jimin said, munching on a cheeseburger. 
She swallowed her bite and spoke again. “What I think is, he’s in love with you too, but he’s an even bigger coward than I thought he was. I believe he got so flustered by the quiz we sent him, but don’t worry, he’ll come to his senses sooner or later.”
You rested your head on your palm and sighed heavily. “I don’t know Jiminie, his behavior is so confusing lately. I kinda regret sending him that quiz”.
“Uh oh, don’t say that again. You confessed and well done for that, so now it’s up to him to decide how the relationship between you two will go. Don’t blame yourself for how a man thinks. You never know what goes on inside those pea sized brains of theirs” Jimin said.
“So you say that he’s ignoring me because he likes me back?” you asked, a question which was addressed more to yourself.
“That's exactly what I’m saying,” Jimin said. “I mean, he couldn’t even look at you and his cheeks were all blushy and stuff? Girl, do we see the same things? Because this clearly shows he has lost his shit over you.”
You remained silent for a while, leaving Jimin to eat her cheeseburger in peace and allowing yourself to sort all of your thoughts that were scrambled inside your mind. Maybe she was right. Again. Her intuition regarding people’s feelings and behaviors is remarkable. She always left you wondering how she could be so good at reading other people.
You thought you were good at it too, until this boy named Lee Donghyuck came into your life. It wasn't that hard to understand him as a little boy, but now that you’re all adults, it seems like he has built walls around his heart and it’s not easy to read him anymore. The problem was that you didn’t know why he did this. He used to allow himself to be open and vulnerable with you. At least you thought so.
Now you are left wondering what’s in his mind and what is it that makes him act this way. Was the quiz that awkward? Did he see you in a different way now?
Questions like this kept messing with you and you wished you could unsend that quiz if it were to prevent this outcome. But you decided to give him a little bit more time. You were friends after all, right? Friends always come back to each other, no matter what. Right?
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The next couple of days Donghyuck had been ignoring you still. Jimin said there was no point in feeling sad about it and that he would just snap one moment and realize what an asshole he was.
You hadn’t told Yangyang about any of that. He had mentioned the quiz once, asking you something like how you made it and what you wrote exactly, but nothing more specific about Donghyuck. So you decided to let it go, he wouldn’t understand anyway.
You were sitting at the park alone, leaning against a tree while watching the sun slowly hiding behind the hill, waiting for the moon to rise and take its place in the sky. The cheerful screams of little kids were gradually fading away and the park was becoming quieter, the only sound interrupting the silence from time to time was the barking of dogs.
You felt peaceful. You found a moment in time to have for yourself, a small escape from all of last week’s dramatic events. You breathed in the fresh air, you let your body relax and your mind roam around the scenery of nature in front of you.
This inner serenity didn’t last long though. Your phone chimed in your pocket and the screen lit up, the intense brightness hurting your eyes due to the contrast with the now darker sky.
You lowered the brightness in order to take a better look at the text on your screen. You squinted your eyes a bit further, this time not because of the brightness.
[Hyuck]
i really need to talk to you
it’s important
you know where to find me
i’m at your favorite place
You kept rereading Donghyuck’s texts over and over. So he ignores me for days and now all of a sudden he wants us to meet and he puzzles me with a riddle? What the hell?
You turned off your phone and stared blankly in front of you, trying to think of what place Donghyuck was talking about. You didn’t even care about what he wanted to tell you. You had to find him first.
The gears inside your brain got to work, spinning quickly and digging through your memories to help you find the answer. But you were already in your favorite place. The park. At least it was your favorite at the moment. So if he were at the park, where could he be? You would be able to see him by now.
The gears in your brain suddenly stopped moving and the light bulb shone brightly above your head. You knew exactly where he was. And it wasn’t the park. You grabbed your things quickly and rushed out of the park, heading towards the place you could never imagine that you’ll ever see again.
You had been walking for only ten minutes and your legs were hurting and started feeling wobbly. The one time you actually needed your bike, you didn’t have it. A sigh left your lips and you continued walking, looking at your phone from time to time in case Donghyuck texted you something else or called you.
You could tell that you were almost there by the red and gold lighting attacking your eyes, contrasting with the darkness of your surroundings. You squinted your eyes as a reaction to the sudden appearance of light, walking towards the source of red and gold. The smell of butter popcorn lured you in and that’s how you knew you were at the exact place you needed to be.
You stood under the bright sign, the same white balloons climbing up the pillars on each side of the gate, confetti sprinkled and glued in between them, fairy lights trailing upwards to the glowing sign. ‘Welcome to Dreamland’.
You stood in awe. You never thought you would visit this place again. It's been years since the last time you visited the amusement park and it felt strange yet so familiar sitting there, looking at the place that felt like your childhood home.
Your eyes were roaming around and you just stood still, not moving a single step further. For a moment, you had forgotten the reason why you were there in the first place.
The scent of the familiar cologne was roaming in the air, snapping you out of your thoughts. Donghyuck cleared his throat and you turned around to face him.
He looked beautiful. The lights of the amusement park were reflecting in his eyes, his hair fell softly covering his forehead, his plump lips curved upwards to a smile.
You noticed that he held his arms behind his back, but you didn’t question it. You just stared right into his eyes, just like he stared into yours. “Hi” he said, his voice blurred among the music and random screams from little kids running around the amusement park.
“Hi” you greeted him back, and then both of you remained silent, looking at each other. Your eyes started stinging from keeping them open for a long time, so you lowered your gaze to your feet.
Donghyuck sensed the awkwardness and cleared his throat again before he spoke up. “I’m sorry, Y/n” he said.
Your head jolted up at the sound of his honey voice and your gaze locked in with his. You parted your lips to speak, but he beat you to it. “I’m sorry. I know my behavior was shit. I was an asshole. I was ignoring you when I shouldn’t. I’m surprised that you came to see me after the way I treated you. So thank you" he said.
You didn’t want to speak. You didn’t have the courage to do so, but you also didn’t know what to tell him. Instead, you waited for him to continue talking.
Donghyuck’s gaze shifted from your eyes to other places around him and he pursed his lips. “You know, I received that quiz you sent me” he trailed off.
You gulped at the mention of the quiz and suddenly your heartbeat picked up a pace so fast that was probably beyond human.
“I didn’t-” Donghyuck started, “I didn’t send it back to you because I wanted to answer it now, with you here” he said.
You found yourself incapable of speaking at that moment. You simply nodded and diverted your gaze back to your feet.
“Please look at me Y/n” Donghyuck said and you froze, slowly lifting your head to see him looking directly at you. You could tell he was nervous by the way he inhaled sharply and the soft red color that painted his cheeks.
“I didn’t know you felt this way about me,” he started, “so when I saw that quiz I was so troubled. Maybe you were obvious with it, maybe not, but what’s certain is that I was too nervous around you to even notice anything.”
You tried to process his words and come to a conclusion. Everything that came out of his mouth didn’t make sense to you. Why would he be nervous around me?
Donghyuck gulped and continued. “Do you remember how we met?” he asked, but the question was mostly addressed to himself rather than you. You smiled at the memory. How could you forget such a pretty boy?
“It was here, this exact place. We were both running, we bumped into each other, fell down and then dropped your cotton candy” he said and started laughing. You did the same.
“And then we became friends. Inseparable friends. You have always been the sweetest friend I’ve ever had. You are kind, funny, you make me feel comfortable, you’re always there for me even though I behave so shitty sometimes” he said.
“And you’re so beautiful. I find myself staring at you when you’re looking away and I just ask myself how can a person be this beautiful” he said, his voice getting gradually quieter, just a little bit louder than a whisper.
“Do you know why I stopped contacting you when I left?” Donghyuck asked, this time the question addressed to you.
You cleared your throat before speaking, voice barely audible. “No.” It was the first time you spoke after greeting him.
Donghyuck shifted a bit, balancing his weight on one leg. “Because I liked you so much I couldn’t bear talking to you, knowing that I wasn’t able to see you, touch you and tell you how much I missed you” he said. “I thought that maybe, if I didn’t talk to you again, maybe it would hurt less than it did.”
You felt your lips drying, eyes widening upon hearing these words. This can’t be real. Yes, you wanted him to like you back, but you never expected it to be true. Even if you believed in a slight chance that he might like you back, it never occurred to you that it might actually be true.
“Hyuck, what are you talking about?” you asked him, not believing a single word he was saying.
“I’m talking about how much I like you, Y/n. Fuck, I might even be in love with you. I don’t know, I always get this weird feeling around you and I can’t get it to stop! I keep thinking about you and how I want to be able to kiss you without finding excuses with these stupid spin the bottle games! I like you so fucking much Y/n, I don’t know how to act.”
You stood still, frozen. So this is really happening, you thought. All this time you were worried about your feelings for Donghyuck when he was feeling the exact same way towards you. Your heart fluttered to the sound of his confession and you felt like smiling so hard until your cheeks hurt.
“Please say something Y/n” Donghyuck whispered. You didn’t say anything though. You didn’t have to. Instead, you took a couple steps further and stood right in front of him, placing your hands on each side of his neck, smacking your lips onto his.
He responded immediately, parting his lips slightly to kiss you back. He removed one arm from behind his back to cup your cheek with his hand and he kissed you gently and genuinely.
The knot in your stomach was untied, releasing the butterflies it had been holding in for so long. Donghyuck’s plump lips moved in sync with yours, his soft touch on your cheek sending streaks of warmth down your entire body.
You slowly pulled back to catch your breath, looking at him in his eyes, both of you smiling as hard as ever. “Of course I like you too, dumbass. I’ve liked you ever since I met you.” You said and Donghyuck smiled even harder than before, if it was even possible.
You removed your hands from his neck, dropping them to your side. “What is behind your back?” you asked him eagerly.
Donghyuck dropped his hand from your cheek too and brought his other arm from behind his back, only to reveal a stick of fluffy pink cotton candy.
Your eyes widened at the sight. It was the last thing you expected to see.
“You know, I promised to buy you one because I had dropped it when we bumped into each other, but I never had the chance to do that, so...” Dongyuck said and you slammed your body into his arms, grinning hard and laughing.
You squeezed him tightly and he returned your embrace, wrapping his arms around your waist, his head finding its way to rest in the crook of your neck.
“I think I love you, Donghyuck” you softly said in his ear.
Donghyuck’s grip on you tightened more and he breathed in. “Y/n, I know I love you” he said, just loud enough so that you and only you could hear him.
Donghyuck pulled back slightly so that he could see your face. He was still holding you tightly, as if he physically couldn’t let you go. As you were lost in the pool of honey in his eyes, he spoke with a low voice. “Do you think you’ll finally be able to beat me in bumper cars?” he said.
You laughed at his question and his smile grew wider to the sound. “No, you’re too slow. I actually pity you” you said.
Donghyuck poked the inside on his cheek with his tongue and raised his eyebrow at your answer. “Oh yeah? Let’s find out, bitchass” he said and linked his fingers with yours to guide you to the amusement park.
Just like that, your heart was full. It was right at the place it needed to be from the very beginning. It was finally home.
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The doorbell chimed behind you and a chill breeze entered the inside of the diner for a brief second. You didn’t have to turn your head to realize that a group of high school kids entered the diner, their voices were too loud and annoying. You rolled your eyes and popped a french fry into your mouth.
It’s been about two weeks since you and Donghyuck made it official. You agreed to start a relationship that very night you confessed to each other outside the amusement park. Donghyuck only agreed to go out with you if he won three consecutive races at the bumper cars ride. Turns out you ended up crashing his car in every single round, but Donghyuck kept on saying that he didn’t really mean what he said and kissed you into agreeing to go on another date with him.
You were happy. Ever since you started dating, you found yourself enjoying the time you spent with Donghyuck even more than you did before. It’s not that many things changed, it was mostly the same things you used to do. The only difference was that neither of you was afraid to express their true feelings anymore.
You and Donghyuck were sitting next to each other at the diner booth. Donghyuck had his arm wrapped around your shoulder, while he used his other arm to grab french fries from the bowl on your table. You agreed to buy just one bowl of french fries to ease your appetite before you ordered your actual meals.
Donghyuck was talking to you about the drive-in cinema that will start working again next week. He said that they would be playing one of his favorite movies, so he practically begged you to go with him and treat it as a date as well.
“What are you guys talking about?” you heard Jimin’s voice and you looked up to see that she had just arrived with Yangyang standing there next to her. 
“Oh hey guys, we didn’t hear you entering. I was telling Y/n about the drive-in, it’ll be open again next week. Wanna go-wait-” Donghyuck started saying, but he cut himself off when he noticed that Yangyang was holding Jimin’s hand.
“Dude what?” Donghyuck asked again and you sat there staring at your friends with eyes wide open. Jimin and Yangyang were grinning at your and Donghyuck’s reactions, before they went to sit on the booth opposite of yours.
“Yup, it is exactly what you think it is. Now, what were you saying about the drive-in?” Yangyang casually joined in the conversation without addressing the matter that clearly needed to be addressed.
“Jimin, why didn’t you tell me about this? How long have you guys been going out?” you said smiling at your friends.
“Not that long, just a few days after you guys. See, I was going to tell you about it Y/n, but Yangyang thought it would be funnier if we just showed up one random day like this and let you guys figure it out on your own” Jimin said and Yangyang kissed her forehead before wrapping his arm around her shoulder.
“Yeah, turns out that stupid quiz you girls thought of works wonders” Yangyang said and popped one french fry that he stole from the bowl.
“Wait, Yangyang, you were the one to send Jimin the quiz? Oh how the tables turn” you said and he waved you off.
You weren’t even the slightest bit surprised that Yangyang and Jimin were dating now. Honestly, it was quite obvious that there was something going on between them, but both of them were way too stubborn to admit it. Was it that way with you and Donghyuck too?
The four of you spent time at the diner that night. The feeling of being carefree and relaxed around your friends reminded you of the time you used to spend all together back in high school. It really felt as if you never lost touch with one another, everything was back to normal. Except this time, your heart felt at ease too.
It was getting quite late and the diner was almost empty now. The four of you didn’t really have the heart to check the time and make a move to get up and leave, you were having way too much time to just call it a night.
You had now ordered a second round of drinks, non-alcoholic though because none of you was really that good at staying sober. Instead, you just stuck with fizzy drinks and sodas.
Yangyang emptied out his second bottle of coke before he slammed it on the table. He licked his lips and sighed. “Wow, this was a good one” he said. But this wasn’t the only thing he had in mind. You could tell by the smugness of his expression.
Yangyang smirked and then lifted his head to flash one of his signature wide grins. “I don’t wanna go home yet, guys. So, who’s up for a game of spin the bottle?” he asked.
Jimin kicked his leg under the table, Donghyuck sat up and smacked him in the head and you stretched your arm to pinch his nose. The four of you burst out laughing, thinking about how things would have turned out if it wasn’t for Yangyang’s stupid ideas.
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TAGS: @matchahyuck @peachjaem00 @hyuckieslove @bbyyhyuck @vdollys @positionslab @renjun-fairy @back2jisung @xxxx-23nct @jisungxident @smwhrinthehaze @tgnctzen131 @ridinhyuck @comfzo @daincty @aquamxrina @cas104 @annenakamura @jellymoonbear @nmyarhs @wakasays @hiraarri @myst-03 @meltinghershey @sundamariis @milkpier @kookiedesi @yipyipmorals @yvnjin-s @liliansun @peachyarpakka @06hee @cacaubs @emptynote @hyuckjensung @nanasfavenctzen @hearteyes4ji @the-midnight-arthouse @fairiejjk @idkbrohaha @n0hyuck
join my taglist here !!
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jenoslutie · 4 months
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a dreamy christmas: an nct dream collab
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˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥  Welcome to A Dreamy Christmas Collab, where a group of friends come together for a festive holiday celebration. Each participant in the Secret Santa exchange will be responsible for bringing in a present for the person whose name they’ve drawn. But with the friend group you’ve got, a group of 7 horny guys who think it’ll be funny to play a little prank on you. The 7 of them decide on all becoming your secret santa. While you take on the challenge to find the perfect present for the person who’s name you picked out, your friends are on a mission to each give you the best fuck of your life. As Christmas approaches, get ready to find a present for Renjun while also getting fucked by your friends during the days leading up to it. 
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ೃ࿐ A Dreamy Christmas Collab has 7 slots for all 7 dreamies! 
: ̗̀➛ each fic will be basically the member trying to be readers best present aka "the best fuck of her life" as hyuck calls it.
: ̗̀➛ minimum word count is 800 words! 
: ̗̀➛ each fic will contain smut. 
: ̗̀➛ must be over the age of 18 to join
: ̗̀➛ please make sure to have a discord account (preferred) or have your tumblr dms open so i can contact you on there! 
: ̗̀➛ fics can be posted anytime until december 31st
: ̗̀➛ i am super flexible with ideas so please feel free to share any ideas you have too :D 
HOW TO JOIN? 
❥ to join, send me a message on tumblr with the member you have chosen as well any ideas you have in mind for the fic (cuz im nosy and i wanna know hehe) and i will let you know if that member is taken or not! I am very flexible with the members so i’m okay with the same member being done more than once! 
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✧ LEE MARK - @be-my-sunrise
✧ HUANG RENJUN - @perfumejamal
✧ HUANG RENJUN - @thesafecafe
✧ LEE JENO - @jenoslutie
✧ LEE DONGHYUCK -  @calibabii21
✧ NA JAEMIN - @taeilteller
✧ ZHONG CHENLE - @lowkeyjaemle
✧ PARK JISUNG - @taexoxosgf
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hihi another collab coming your wayyy hehe. i hope this one goes as well as the last one woo. if u have any questions pls lmk :D happy reading!
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ihaechans · 7 months
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#NCT LUVZONE
╰・Welcome to my blog ! © ihaechans (ex. Yu69ta) 2021-2024 ♡
This blog is strictly for 18+ only and contains mature content. If I find any minors on this blog I will block you immediately. Any smut written will be labeled (M) for mature content. do not plagiarize, translate, or repost my works on any platform. This is my only account.
Do NOT ask for a part two if you did not like or reblog the post. Requests are always open! Don't be shy to send one!
♡ More info ➜ about me | WIPS
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⋆ — LEE TAEYONG
Fantasy — (M)
Over and over again. The dreams of your roommate fucking you senseless keep reoccurring and there’s nothing you can do about it…well, maybe one thing but the issue is that Taeyong is too shy and timid to even hold a conversation with you longer than two minutes.
.
⋆ — LEE DONGHYUCK
Again & Again — (M)
Haechan is needy. So needy that he can’t wait until you get home to play with himself, breaking the number one rule in your book. What was supposed to be a night of innocent quality time ends in Haechan getting milked dry, begging for you to make him cum over & over again. and over again.
Your Red Lipstick — (F)
Kisses, kisses, kisses. That’s all your boyfriend wants. When you refuse to give him the one thing he craves, he won’t leave you alone, begging and begging until you give in.
Impatient — (M)
Your boyfriend Donghyuck just wants you all to himself.
.
⋆ — MARK LEE જ⁀➴ Timestamps: [10:37pm]
Reminiscing — (F)
Time flies. Especially with best friend and nerdy ride-or-die Mark Lee. Reminiscing on the rooftop leads to foreign emotions and forgotten memories rising to the surface, and the obvious tension between you two can no longer be avoided.
.
⋆ — JEONG JAEHYUN
Back for More — (M)
Jaehyun can’t get enough of you, and you can’t get enough of him either.
.
⋆ — PARK JISUNG
Crush on You — (M)
Jisung is a little too innocent for his own good, and when he asks you to help him fix that your friendship takes a slight turn…. okay, maybe a big turn.
PT.2 "7 Days" — PT.3 "Teach Me"
.
⋆ — NA JAEMIN
Midnight Driver — (M)
Fucking in the middle of no where with a man you met no more than a month ago was not something on your bucket list, but for some reason, it wasn’t something you were completely against.
Hallows Eve — (M) part of @/jenoslutie '1-800-slashers' collab
When your friend told you about 1-800-SLASHERS. You could almost laugh at her. Paying people to roleplay as characters from scary movies? Who does that? But once you found yourself calling 1-800-SLASHERS way more than you’d like to admit, even going as far as using their video call feature time and time again. You don’t think you can stop.
Smile! You're on Camera — (M)
Jaemin loves taking pictures. He loves the beautiful and captivating nature, golden sunsets, gloomy rainy days, and flower fields. The only sight that is his favorite though, is the one of his girlfriend on her knees.
.
⋆ — DONG SI CHENG
Late at Night — (M)
Late-night walks around the city with your boyfriend Winwin turn out way more exciting than usual.
.
⋆ — XIAO DEJUN જ⁀➴ Timestamps: [7:00pm]
.
⋆ — LEE JENO
જ⁀➴ Sub Jeno thoughts...
.
⌞ DRABBLES, REACTIONS, HEADCANONS⌝
⋆ — NCT 127
You trying to dom them : ✘
NCT 127 as boyfriends :  ✘
.
⋆ — NCT DREAM
NCT Dream & Overstimulation : ✘
.
⋆ — WAYV
Attractive things they do : ✘
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tmzrkstan · 7 months
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the idol!reader stuff eats so bad but barely anybody does it
I am particularly passionate about this type of reading. And taking advantage of the moment, I leave here an old idea that I never gave a chance to. ;)
nct dream (hyung line) working with ex idol!s/o.
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•----------••----------••----------••----------••-------•
genre: idol!reader, ex to lovers (?), smutty, adult language.
•----------••----------••----------••----------••-------•
✭MARK:
Looking from a professional point of view, it was such a great opportunity. You could finally get to do another kind of concept, show other side of yours. Besides, you knew very well how much of a talented idol Mark was. Your team almost beg you for you to do it, them just freaking out with the attention y'all would get.
Even when you accepted there wasn't really a lot of meeting with your ex. Untill the MV shooting day at least. There you were, watching Lee from far while finishing your make up. He was receiving instructions from the director.
"Hey..." your voice sounded quietly.
"Hi!" his eyes turned out similiar from a lost puppy. "You look nice... I mean, it´s nice seeing you." he just got a short smile from you. "Your part it´s really great"
"Of course, you must think so since you composed it" he stammered a bit before correcting himself "No, I meant you made it a lot better."
Before any more chances to say anything the director made you two start the work there. Both of you acting the way you were supposed to. Inside, you were annoyed and still feeling a litle hurt, on the Mark´s side, he was feeling awful. He knew it was his fault that the break up happened. You were the most understanding girlfriend ever, since you knew what beeing an idol means. But you also got tired of waiting for your turn, to get attention. He lost weeks not even calling you while on tour, but you didn´t. Always texted and videocalled him.
After a lot of fighting you gave up and clean the way for him to focus just on that. Lee really tried to see as the best thing for you both but he was suffering every day since. His members made him notice who the jerk was. He smiled like a child on Christmans morning whwn you agreed to collab with him. It was the last chance and it would be worth.
Hours passed out, your ex complimented and took care of you all day long. Those who didn´t knew about your relantionship were surprised by how a gentleman he was with you, who just tried your best not to fall for his sweetness again. Especially when you found a letter on your bag during a pause.
It was his hand writting and his true feelings. Apologies all over it, confessions like that he writted the love lyrics of the song for you and that he never stoped loving you. Admitted he was wrong and childshid and was ready for trying again if you do too.
''Oh boy'' you thought as seeing how good he was with words while they were on paper.
The last ''Cut!'' was heard and you carefully whisper at him "We can have dinner, that´s all." you bet he was happy. "Better not wase my time."
"I would never dare to do it again."
✭Renjun:
Beeing in a relantionship with him was sweet, comfortable and lovely. But unfortunally this only was like this when you still a trainee. When you had a chance to debut it all changed. Schedueles, dates, you lost time together and all the fighting started. You just didn´t talked with each other anymore since the end. Until you worked together in a survival reality as judges.
Everybody noticed how you were always on opposite sides and skewered each other for your different opinions. There were even compilations of yours fights, that carried a lot of chemistry and tension, on the internet every week and the audience loved this intrigue.
Eventually, they ended up having to help the same team, which made them put their fights aside and gather even behind the cameras looking for a solution to help the poor trainees.
"I can't understand your point" you rolled your eyes laughing "Of course you never did." he huffed "It's not all about you, though you may think so..." you were discussing what would be the best direction for a choreography.
"You're so childish! It's obvious that this step is better! You take it, however, you lose your balance at a certain point and end up almost falling, if it weren't for him catching himself abruptly. Eye contact was present and you felt your mouth go dry and your hands sweat.
"You should be more careful!" he puts you back on your feet, still holding tight to your waist. "If not what?" he looked down at you "What?" you then repeated "If not what will happen?"
"I'm going to have to teach you a few things…how to respect your elders." "How?" He sighed, smiling with some anger. Took you to the wall attacking your lips aggressively as he squeezes your waist again and you lose your fingers in his hair.
✭Jeno:
Starting to date with your co-worker wasn´t a really a good idea, especially if him was another MC from the TV show you worked on. But who could blame you for not resisting to Jeno? I mean, look at him right?
You should´ve said "no'' the first time he asked you out, but was too late now. After a few months you two had a big fight because of diferences on toughts and were obligated to work together for at least five weeks more. You runaway for as long as you could but after a quick tour on Asian you had to get back. But it was clear that he wasn´t going to make this easy.
A lot of smiles and flirting talks run free during the meeting for planning the week and when you were on make up session.
"Just shut your mouth up!" you yelled as soon as the stylists leaved the room.
"Why? Need it shut for you to kissed?"
"I´m gonna punch just on the midle of your face."
"The face you love." he smiled all playfull.
"I simply hate your attitude and confidence, you´re not that all." you roll your eyes as you listen to him laugh. "What?"
"It´s fun... the way we were making out on that sofa a few days earlier and now you are saying this stupid thing..."
"You are stupid." he got up, walking to behind your chair and facing you through the mirror. "Really, darling? Only because we had a silly fight you think that?"
"You know it wasn´t silly" you sigh. "For me it was, anything that keeps me away of these beautyful lips it´s silly..." he pus both hands around your shoulders, caressing exactly the way you like it.
"Don´t...don´t touch me." you hesitate before spinning your chair to his front. "I´m not going to fall for your charm again."
"So I do have a charm." his high was cut in half by his knees touching the carpet. "You fall once, sweetheart." he blinked slowly before biting his lower lip. "Let´s not promise things we can´t deal with later, ok?"
The door was open after three knocks, reveling the hairstylist team. He came back to his chair, with a cheeky smile. Oh, he was so sure you would be his again, just in a matter of time...
✭Haechan:
You really didn´t wanted to finished things with Donghyuck, but unfortunately beeing famous demanded a lot. When you noticed your, just recent, relantionship with him was making Haechan a lot distracted from his work you felt guilty. With wich power could you make him risk everything if you got into his life few days ago? So hard, but you did it. Lied and end it all because of "mental confusions".
But here you were, getting ready to practice a dance stage with him for an award concert. The fans picked you two for it, based on your aparently "friendship", and you get bad to your side if you recused.
Very diferent from what you expect, he was normal around, at least for his general behavior. He joked around with the dance instructor and tried to make you laugh, he wasn´t awkard at all. However, you felt very strange inside.
Luckly, you guys were quick with it and finished the day earlier. You grab your things nd almost run to grab the elevator, the same he stops putting one hand between the doors.
"Oh, isn´t such a coincidence?" he pressed the bottom on the metalic wall.
"I guess..." you smiled weakly.
"I didn´t get why you so weird around me..." he sigh slowly. "I should be the one to be like this, since you broke my heart few days ago, right?" even though his words looked painfull he was smiling yet. "You really didn´t had pitty for me, y/n..."
"Haechan, I..." your felt like falling as the elevator lurched and its lights were replaced by a darker, apparently the emergency one. "What´s this?" you grabed your bag stronger.
"Don´t worry, this one always do something like it, just wait a few minutes." he put his back at one wall.
"What? Why didn´t you told me before?" he looked down "I ask the same to you..."
"Come on, it´s not the same thing!" you frowned at him. "All we can do it´s wait, i swear it happended before."
"Fine... but I won´t be listening to you atacking me or my motives during this time!"
"I wouldn´t do it." he shrugged. "Even hurted, I know you didn´t mean anything that you said." "What?" the man came closer "It may look like not enough time, but I nkow you well by now. You were concerned."
"About?" he looked up "Me giving all of me in this...what did you called it? Hookup time."
"You can´t be sure of that." you tried to get back but he grabbed you wrist "But I am, as much as I decide to forgive you for this." he put one hand on your cheek "Also sure that you missed me how I missed you..." And everything happened quickly, the touch of lips, the lights and the elevator coming back and the doors opening in Jaemin and Jisung's faces who watched everything with a shocked face.
•----------••----------••----------••----------••-------•
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marvelous-llama · 6 months
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NCT recs
most of the mentioned works is 18+ NSFW, MINORS DNI
tumblr is based on reblogs not likes, so please reblog and comment under works you like. Show love to the authors and appreciate their hard work
<<next chapters
pls don´t hesitate to hmu, if any of mentioned links doesn´t work or you have suggestions for more fics... thank you so much for all the love and comments
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Temptation by @lisired
buwan ng wika by @maknaesdancersrappers
RUNNING AWAY AFTER CONFESSING TO THEM by @ruwriteshours (NCT Dream)
Apply Within by @iced-nct (NCT Dream)
Frat House series by @shwazzberryswriting
ISTJ by @lowkeyjaemle (NCT Dream)
diary of the heartbreakers by @ryozaki21 (00´ line)
simplify romance by @rrxnjun (00´ line)
Let me Love you by @key201303 (WayV)
Frat House by @crdteezv (WayV)
mad city by @misted-dream
90´s love franchise by @mayaflowerxs (90´s Love)
the heart is the goal by @doderyscoffee (NCT Dream)
Crimson Aurora Hotel & Spa collab by @myeoning-call
Moon Taeil
Johnny Suh
Lee Taeyong
Nakamoto Yuta
Qian Kun
Kim Dongyoung
Ten Lee
Jeong Yoono
Dong Sicheng
Kim Jungwoo
Mark Lee
Xiao Dejun
Wong Kunhang
Huang Renjun
Lee Jeno
Lee Donghyuck
Na Jaemin
Liu Yangyang
Zhong Chenle
Park Jisung
Oh Sion
Maeda Riku
Tokuno Yushi
Kim Daeyoung
Hirose Ryo
Fujinaga Sakuya
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neochan · 6 months
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💌 - from the bottom of my heart, i want to thank each and every one of you who has decided to stick around <3 to those who like, comment, send asks, & reblog; this blog wouldn't have grown this big without you. & to the silent readers, thank you for indulging in my world of nct.
i never thought our community would grow this big. i mean, fifteen thousand people....and you want to read my writing? it baffles me honestly. but i'm so so thankful i have the ability to create a safe environment for yall to talk about our little kpop boys haha!!
each one of you has brought your unique insights and energy to this space, & i really cannot thank you enough. god, i remember sitting in the library like four years ago when i only had about a thousand followers... and even still, writing for nct has continued to bring me joy, and you all have been apart of keeping that spark alive.
& so have the mutuals i've met along the way. a lot of them have drifted off into bigger and better things, but to the ones who are still around, you mean a lot to me and this blog. never forget that.
huge thank you to @peachjaem00 . you've been stuck with me for years, and i couldn't think of a better mutual to spend that time with. we have both grown as people & writers and i want to thank you for always being there to help me through anything. i hope i can continue being that person for you as well.
& for @rainyjeno . you started as a reader and ended up being a friend. if it weren't for this blog, i wouldn't have driven hundreds of miles to see you and go get sushi, we wouldn't have facetimes and collabs etc. planned. we wouldn't have the friendship we do. thank you for always being here <3
and finally, @saintlyhyuck . kay, you aren't around much anymore, but we still talk all the time, & i love having the four hour phone calls. i love screaming abt things other than nct. i love planning a trip to come see you (my first ever international trip). and i thank you for being an amazing mutual to this blog.
there are so many others, @hykwrld , @mrkis , @hyuckmov , @ofjunemoment , @ohmytyong @lisired you guys are at the top of my head rn. thank you for supporting me and this blog. i'll continue to do the same for you <3
okay, moving on lol. i got too sappy i think. but as for the future of this blog. i have put this off for a while, but i'm going to stop writing soon. by soon, i mean this time next year. i'm going to be entering law school, and moving on to bigger and better things like my past mutuals. i'll be stuck doing real adult stuff, and i won't be able to continue this blog.
but that doesn't mean you'll see the last of neochan. you still have a year with me, sam, but once the time comes, this blog will be passed on to someone else who will continue the neochan legacy (there isn't really one but i like the sound of that.) of course, i may change my mind, if this becomes the stress reliever that it once was, but for now, i'm pretty set on this.
so here's to our last year, let's make it count, okay?
sam <3
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thelargefrye · 1 year
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JUST Y/N THINGS EVERY IXLUVS NEEDS TO KNOW … headcanons
was apart of kq fellaz and trained with ateez
moved to korea in 2015 to become a trainee
was sought after by several companies including the big 3 but chose kq after meeting hongjoong
is referred to as the “4th gen concept queen” because of how you do a new concept with each comeback
is widely known by other fandoms cause of your fashion and how even your personal style is always on trend
has started several trends in korea like jelly nails, belly chains, and fur hats
had a model concept and announced your comeback by creating a magazine that featured different concept images
learned how to pole dance for a comeback and even has a pole dance ver. to your song mago
collabed with mattel for your 2023 season’s greetings which came with a doll of yourself
you tied with loona for 2nd place on queendom
you are close friends with ateez, fans often spot you hanging out with several members in public
yeosang is your appointed fandom president
you and ateez did a reality show together in 2021 called “project the chillin’ house” which was eight episodes
you revealed in an interview once that the ateez member you are the closest to is yeosang 
“he’s very good at listening to me ramble and putting up with my pointless rants especially when we were trainees. i really appreciate yeosang for being such a caring friend to me.” 
has cussed on multiple lives and ixluvs now keep a tally for how many times you do it and you are now at 56
you have a great relationship with your manager and other staff members
made bracelets, keychains, and phone charms for the staff members that work closely with her
self-proclaimed herself as eden’s favorite
“hello, i’m y/n, eden’s favorite child. sorry i don’t make the rules.”
along with nct, you were one of the first idols to film the recording behinds to your songs and have been doing since early 2019
you once did a live dedicated to tier ranking the barbie movie villains 
has also went on a ten minute rant about why 12 dancing princesses and princess and the pauper are the best barbie movies
you were forced to lipsync at an event and instead of pretending, you just didn’t sing
appeared on immortal song 2 on the psy special and placed 2nd 
probably one of the few underrated dancers in 4th gen kpop
however everyone always talks about your vocals and how you’re one of the best in 4th gen kpop
ixluvs and atiny are patiently waiting for a collab between you and jongho
is more popular among female idols than male idols
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aryomengrande · 4 months
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#fromaryg or the tag for my stuff
#fromaryg: nsh inventory or my not-so-hidden inventory in which i store the digital spreads about the details of the commissions i've done (so i can compile it in an app called paper we transfer)
#fromaryg: commission or the tag for the commissions i’ve done
aryomengrande.carrd.co or the site to go to for more inquiries about commissioning me
#fromaryg: selfship or my general tag for my selfships (#bajira, #hara)
#aryg127 or my yearly tradition of making artworks of the characters featured in my top 1, 2, and 7 most liked posts across all my social media platforms, all of which will reference albums/tracks by kpop group nct 127
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2023 division feat. seishu inui exhibition art, hajime kokonoi exhibition art, and kakucho introduction day art
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recent stuff feat. time fragments (hara) and suguru geto (birthday art)
stuff in progress feat. yuta okkotsu birthday art ideas, yuji itadori birthday art ideas, and tokrev collab with @/half-baked-biscuit
recent commissions feat. keibby (selfship) and minxi (selfship)
commissions in progress feat. headshot (2) and half-body (1)
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instagram | pinterest | reddit | tiktok | twitter | ko-fi | © aryomengrande 2023
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calibabii21 · 1 year
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masterlist
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disclaimer: by no means am I *intentionally* excluding or discriminating against anyone of any ethnicity, body size, height, gender, etc.  seeing as I don’t use physical appearance descriptions, anyone and everyone can read my stories. but let it be known that I generally write for black women, as we are usually the excluded, and I believe we all deserve someone writing for, about, and on behalf OF us, with the people we desire to believe we have a chance with. because the reality is: we do. point, blank, period. we literally have just as much a chance as anyone to be with the one(s) we desire, so, I want to provide that descriptive, literary, visual for my fellow black queens and that’s that.
in addition: my content is not, whatsoever, for minors. if you are under the age of 18 do not interact with me or this page in any way, shape, or style. if your blog is empty and/or does not have your age displayed, it is an automatic block.
m = mature s = suggestive f = fluff a = angst
misc.
isn't this what you wanted (m) - reader's choice
rendezvous (s) - reader's choice
i hate you (m) - p.fn
collabs
a dreamy Christmas (m) - l.hc (w/ @jenoslutie)
be my valentine (m) - k.dy (w/ @jasminexox5)
Christmas in September (m) - n.jm (w/ @neoculturecollectives)
requests
stoner!hyuck (m) - l.hc
reactions
smoking with Dream (m)
wine drunk with Dream (m, s)
scenarios
things said during sex & dinner (m, s) - nct 127
things said during sex & dinner (m, s) - nct dream
series
you're mine too (m) - suh. j, k.dy, l.mk
awakened (m) - nct dream
nct 127
call me a jerk (m) - suh. j
anytime, anywhere (m) - j.jh
sensual banter (s) - j.jh
strawberries n' cream (f) - k.dy
drip drop (m) - k.dy
work your magic (m) - k.dy
isn’t the sky beautiful (m) - k.dy
are you jealous? (m) - k.dy
rock and a hard place (s) - n.yt
nct dream
awakened (m) - l.jn
sli(ck-p)up (m) - l.jn
awakened pt 2 (s) - nct dream
awakened pt 3 (m) - p.js
in my mind (m) - p.js, l.hc
you're a godsend (f, a) - l.mk
riize
why are you so damn cute (m, s) - l.an
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yuta-nakamots · 2 years
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Touch - S.Johnny
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Pairing(s) - Volleyball!Johnny x Female Reader, featuring Ten as Johnny’s roommate and teammate
Genre(s) - Fluff, University!AU, friends to lovers
Warning(s) - descriptions of an injury (Johnny gets injured during a game)
Summary - As a first year student majoring in English, you would have never thought that you’d end up working for the sports news network at your university. Even more so, flirting with one of your coworkers who happens to be on the men’s volleyball team.
Word Count - 8.6k
Author’s Note - I’ve had this in my drafts for nearly 2 years now and I’m so happy to finally release it! It’s been a while since I’ve competitively played volleyball so I’m sorry if my descriptions of actions aren’t the best but feedback is always appreciated!
Written for the NCT Sports Collab previously hosted by @leesmrk (deactivated) and currently hosted by @yuta-nakamots​ (me)​.
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Leaving home for college in your second semester was definitely scary and to make it worse, you did not know anyone at your school. There were a few other students who graduated from your high school but they were not close enough to call them friends. What’s more, you had promised your parents that you would get a part-time job to help pay for tuition without a single clue of how to go about doing so.
It seemed like some higher being was on your side when you received an email with information on the fall semester job fair. As you were going through the long list of departments hiring, none of them really caught your eye except for one, sports news.
Sports News Network: Flexible hours, no grade level standing necessary, open to all students. Experience in sports is preferred. Must be comfortable doing tasks such as running the scoreboard/live stream, taking pictures/videos, and managing player statistics during athletic events. Spring sports include but are not limited to; Volleyball, Baseball, and Softball. If you are interested, please leave your name and university email address. Thank you!
At the job fair, it was almost as if you had tunnel vision while making a beeline toward the booth, barely sparing the others a second glance. It didn’t seem like a boring desk job you would regret taking up so you eagerly jotted down your information on the paper, only slightly worried about the large number of students who applied before you.
You were not clueless with cameras and shooting content. Ever since childhood, you had experience with a wide variety of sports or at least prior knowledge of the ones mentioned in the job description. Leaving the job fair, you felt as dreadfully excited as one could possibly be when entering their first semester at a new school.
About a week later, an email came in from the director of the Sports News Network congratulating you on being hired and asking for your general availability. You responded almost immediately and sent a detailed list of your schedule. Apparently, your schedule was a near-perfect match for the job since athletic games were mostly on weekends, or occasionally weekday evenings while your classes were exclusively on weekdays with most evenings free.
Apparently, it was not common to take so much initiative because you were one of the first new hires brought in to start training at a women’s volleyball game. Most of the other people working at this particular game had at least a year of experience. They had little to no difficulty going between fulfilling their duties and also instructing you on how to do yours or fixing it when you made a mistake.
Though you were given mostly menial tasks like running the scoreboard and monitoring the live stream, it was most enjoyable when you were handed a camera and told to go down on the court and take action shots. It seemed a bit scary with all the balls flying around, looking like they were coming directly at you through the lens of the camera.
“Careful, sometimes it feels like dodgeball over here,” one of your coworkers joked. “Here, take my spot in the corner, I’ll get the ones behind the court line. I’m Johnny, by the way. You’re one of the new hires right?”
“Yeah, it’s my first day actually,” you informed him while switching spots with him. “How long have you been working here?”
“Three years now. I started when I was a freshman and never left,” he shared as he caught a ball that had been hit out of bounds.
You took a few pictures of both teams celebrating their hard work as the set concluded. “Interesting. What’s been keeping you here so long?”
“First off, I love photography and it’s been a hobby of mine since maybe the end of middle school,” he ushered you off to the side of the court where it was not as crowded, “second, I’m on the men’s volleyball team so it helps to have a hand in what gets posted about us and make sure all the information is correct. It motivates me even more if anything since I want to make sure my teammates look good.”
“Wow, this is practically the perfect job for you then,” you remarked while going over your shots from throughout the game.
Johnny chuckled a bit. “Yeah, I guess one could say that.”
He became an immense help as you started learning all the different roles and tasks for the Sports News Network. He showed you the best spots for pictures in each sport and how to take ones that are more likely to get chosen for the school newspapers. He was also the one to teach you how to run the sound system of the gym though he could not help himself from acting like an upscale DJ in the process.
He even made sure to introduce you to some of your other coworkers who were more experienced, similar to himself. Since men’s volleyball was coming up, he would be on the court as an athlete instead of working so he wanted to make sure you were comfortable asking other employees for help too. The thought of seeing Johnny in action was exciting and you could only imagine how he would look in his volleyball uniform and not his normal hoodie and jeans ensemble.
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It felt intimidating to be taking photos without Johnny beside you to ask for advice. Though it was reassuring to be able to see him through the lens of the camera knowing he was still right in front of you. Really, it was even possible to just run over during a timeout or while he sat on the bench if you seriously needed his help.
Despite this, it seemed like he was intent on making it obvious he was still paying attention to you even when on the court. When he and his team came out to warm up, they were met with the enthusiastic cheering of their fans and you took pictures of them waving and hyping up the crowd. Johnny was quick to find you and make a funny face, eliciting odd looks from his teammates toward him.
During warm-ups, he did not hesitate to strike a pose while running through your line of sight and stopping so you could get a better shot of him. “How do I look?” he asked, after mimicking The Discobolus after shagging a ball.
“Amazing,” you joked, “wanna take a look?”
“Hmm, that’s good but it would look better once I’m uniform.” He rolled up the sleeves of his warm-up shirt and recreated the pose. “Something more like this, you know? To get the boys in there.”
“Right, got it.” You laughed while he got called back into the drill by one of his coaches. There were a few of his teammates giving you second glances but you figured it was because Johnny kept interacting with you.
Once the starting lineups were being announced for both teams, you tried to do as Johnny instructed, situating yourself at a forty-five-degree angle from the team. Fortunately, the opposing team, the Warriors, was called out first so there was time to practice on them before taking pictures of your own men’s team.
You wanted to make sure Johnny’s photos look good they would show him you were listening to his advice and taking the job seriously. It felt like your nervousness only heightened when the crowd erupted in cheers as the Spartan name was mentioned, signaling the start of the home team’s lineup.
Taeyong, the team captain and outside hitter was introduced first, wearing the number 1 on his jersey. He stepped forward and addressed both sides of the gymnasium, giving you more than enough time to get a few pictures of him in. Yuta, the Allstar right-side hitter was next as number 7 followed by Ten, the team’s libero wearing, well, the number 10. Those three were known the be the favorites and the volume of the crowd definitely reflected that.
Sicheng was called upon, with some visible hints of confusion from the audience as the setter position, regularly occupied by Taeil as number 33, was now taken by him with number 28. It occurred to you that Taeil had been missing during warmups though you simply assumed he must be sick or missing for some other reason like an exam or interview. But you were interested in seeing Sicheng play since he hardly ever participated in games due to being a first-year while Taeil was in his final season with the team.
When the Spartan’s middle blocker wearing the number 29 was introduced, you got butterflies in your stomach but it was hard to tell if they were from your slowly developing attraction toward him or not. Johnny proudly came forward and waved to both sides of the gymnasium, lingering just a second longer on the side you were crouched on. Last, but not least, was another first-year student on the team. Jaehyun, adorning the number 77, was introduced and showed off his endearing dimples while acknowledging the crowd.  
The two teams met at the net to exchange greetings before the start of the match and you continued to take shots of the home team, wanting to be able to have gotten a photo for every member of the team. Kun, as number 11 led the rest of the team in following their starting lineup. On the roster, he was listed as the team’s second defensive specialist due to his skill all around the court. Following him was Doyoung, another right-side hitter who wore the number 26 and was often substituted in for Yuta when the older got too heated about bad calls by the officials.
The match started just the same as any other volleyball game, the constant back and forth of the ball making you feel somewhat dizzy at times. The male athletes kept up a faster rally than what was typical in the women’s matches, which left you struggling to keep up with the plays.
You remained on the same side of the court your team was on, which allowed you to hear the news of Taeil’s arrival about fifteen minutes after Taeyong had delivered the first serve of the game. The coaches and staff were anxiously whispering to each other as Taeil slipped into the line of other players standing next to the seats of the bench. “Should we put him in now?” The assistant coach asked.
“No, let’s wait for the boys to get a lead, I don’t want to disrupt the rhythm they have going right now,” the head coach responded. Sicheng started off a bit rocky with some of his sets going a little too low or a bit off target but within a play or two, he had settled down and been able to give his teammates nice passes for their kills.
Once the Spartans had pulled ahead by eight points, Taeil was called on from the lineup and substituted in for Sicheng. The other substitutes congratulated Sicheng as he took a seat on the bench while you got pictures of the other five members on the court welcoming Taeil in.
He had a worried expression on his face while he fell into position, ready for his teammates to receive the incoming serve. Yuta neatly bumped the ball to Taeil at the net, who then set it a little too short for Jaehyun on the outside. He quickly changed his direction to still get it over the net but his attack lacked its normal amount of sheer force.
This allowed the Warriors, to have an easier time organizing themselves to have a strong offensive play, sending Ten diving for the ball when it came beaming over. He had his arm stretched out for the pancaking technique in a desperate attempt to save the play, barely giving Taeil enough time to situate himself under the ball for the second touch. Again, he was unable to successfully hand off the momentum to his chosen hitter, this time being Yuta who had to stop his prep before jumping and spiking from the ground.
The opposing team had yet another opportunity to deliver an attack on the scattered team whose only composed defense was Johnny and Jaehyun shifting around at the net, getting ready to block the other team’s hitter. The ball got sent straight into Johnny’s extended arms causing it to fall slowly towards the ground, interrupted only by Taeil’s effort to get it back in the air.
It was a good attempt but instead of going straight up, it shot out to the back end of the court, none of the boys able to reach it in time. “Get your head in the game, Taeil,” the head coach shouted before shaking his head in disappointment at the senior. “Sicheng, get ready to go back in during the next set.”
The lead the Spartans had previously held became a neck and neck race to the end of the first set. Yuta closed off the last three points with a string of service aces, much to the dismay of the opposing team and the relief of the team next to you. As the court switched sides during the timeout, you reviewed some of the stills and adjusted your settings to have a faster shutter speed after noticing a motion blur in a few of them.
It felt like hardly any time went by when the twelve players were already returning to the court and the Warriors delivered their first serve of the second set. Ten received the ball, effectively stabilizing it for Sicheng who was able to set up a beautiful attack for Taeyong and earn the first point in the set. Now that you were on the opposite side of the court from the team, you could get photos of them from the front and capture their faces instead of just their numbers on the back of their jerseys.
Johnny was up to serve next. Excitement built itself up at the rare sight of a middle blocker serving. With so much distance in the second set remaining, it made sense to allow him to flaunt his court-dominating power. Though he wasn’t often trained to have such a heavy serve, his ball flew into the court with even more intensity than that of Taeyong or Yuta, the team’s strongest hitters.
There was a sequence of chaos as the Warriors struggled to return Johnny’s service, resulting in his first service ace of the game. The audience reacted enthusiastically, showing their support to see the middle blocker being given another go at starting off the play. Johnny ended up claiming his second service ace while the third was cut short by a well-placed attack from the opposing right-side hitter.
The second set continued on similar to the beginning half of the first set and the Spartans quickly racked up their points. By the time the score had reached the 20s, it was getting close to Johnny’s turn to serve once more and you fully expected him to be substituted but it seemed like their coaches wanted to see if they could steal the set with more aces.
You peered through the lens of the camera as Johnny stood at the other end of the court, waiting for the referee to signal for him to serve as he shifted the ball in his hands. This could possibly be the end of another set and the gymnasium was silent aside from the shrill sound of the whistle followed by Johnny’s footsteps as he tossed the ball into the air.
He took only two steps before jumping and pulling his arm behind him, his hand perfectly framing his face. You pressed the button on the camera, hoping the shutter speed would be able to catch these next moments as his hand came down on the ball, launching it across the court, easily clearing the net and falling into play as the opposing team received his strong serve.
There was no time to rest, already finding Johnny’s large frame again and tracking his movements as he fell into position behind Jaehyun, crouching with his hands out, ready for the incoming attack. When you noticed the opposing team’s outside hitter prep for the kill, you took rapid-fire shots again as Jaehyun jumped from the other side of the net, arms extended in hopes of a block.
Both the teams and the crowd burst into chaos as the ball was hit right into Jaehyun’s arms and came falling down against him, sending Ten scrambling to recover it. He managed to pop it up to the back where Johnny prepared to spike it over and again you set your camera off. His hand made contact with the ball, sending it into an empty space on the other side of the court, the opposing team failing to reach it in time.
“And that wraps it up for set two of the game, folks. The Spartans lead the Warriors, two sets to none.” You continued following Johnny as he turned around to celebrate the win of the second set with his teammates and were pleasantly surprised when he parted from their huddle to send a playful look with a pose, drawing laughs from the rest of the team as they either joined him or left for the locker room.
Entertaining him, you took a few photos of him and his teammates until someone came and dragged them away, allowing you to finally head back to the sideline. Since it was halftime, there was a fair amount of time to sit down with your laptop and upload the pictures to see how they came out.
Already, once the first few loaded, you were quite happy with the quality of the stills from today after switching the exposure settings as per Johnny’s suggestion. You were even able to get a few of Kun and Doyoung throughout the few minutes of the set they played before they were substituted out.
The way their skin glistened under the light of the gymnasium was truly something to be adored and you couldn’t help but stare in awe at the way they looked while clicking through the photos. It took a bit of time to get through them all, especially with how many were taken with the rapid shutter speed, but when you finally reached the action shots of Johnny, you could’ve sworn your heart did a little dance in your chest.
His hair fell in front of his eyes as he held the ball in his hands, the veins and athletic tape he wore made them all the more eye-catching. You went through the next few in which the ball floated in the air as he prepped for his service with his lips slightly parted, tracking the ball above him.
You didn’t get to finish looking at them all because the ones where he finally made contact with the ball were particularly eye-catching. Johnny’s arm was extended above his head, his toned muscles flexing as he followed through with the motion. Your eyes trailed down from his arm to his face, where you became lost in the details of his curved lips pulled thin as he clenched his jaw or the small beads of sweat covering his skin.
Going down even further, you took in the broad expanse of his chest and shoulders, the sleeveless uniform granting the privilege of seeing the warm shades of his skin and the definition of his muscles underneath it. You thanked the lightweight uniform once again when there was a glimpse of his abs peeking out from where his shirt drifted upwards, revealing a substantial portion of his torso.
It was almost mesmerizing, looking at Johnny’s physique like this. You were so engrossed in admiring the photo that you didn’t even notice the team coming back out to the court and Johnny’s presence behind you. “You’ve been looking at that picture for nearly a whole minute now. Are you okay?”
Your soul leaped out of your body for a second. “Good lord, don’t scare people like that, Johnny.”
“I was just standing here,” he stated, “you’re the one who found me to be scary.”
“What- wh-” you stuttered in confoundment, “who in their right mind just stands behind people and expects to not be considered scary?”
“Depends,” Johnny shrugged, “who in their right mind stares at a photo of their coworker for a minute straight?”
“I- you know what?” you were fumbling for a witty response, “I could have been checking for motion blur and thinking about which settings to adjust.”
Johnny raised an eyebrow and nodded as if thinking about that situation. “You could have been,” he agreed, “but you weren’t.”
“How would you know that?” you asked mockingly.
“Oh, I just know,” he taunted, “I have my ways.” He glanced over at the scoreboard and saw the time continuing to count down. “Also, I guess this is a better time than ever, but I heard some of the flowers at a botanical garden are gonna bloom this weekend. Would you like to come with me to take some pictures?”
“Yeah sure, just let me know when and we can set something up,” you agreed, “but I think you should get out there, some of your teammates are looking at us.” Ten was standing with his hands on his hips, waiting for his volleying partner to join him.
“Right, I’ll get your number later,” he assured while heading back onto the court, “take shots of my teammates, not just me!” You exhaled heavily, unamused.
Some of the best photos of the match came from the third set since you were now acclimated to the speed of the plays and the movements of the guys on the team. Taeyong had a constant lead-up to his attack compared to Yuta who was more spontaneous. Jaehyun was slower than his teammates but it was obvious why he became a starter despite being only a freshman along with Sicheng, whose setting form was ever so elegant.
The team’s senior setter was not as easy to track, though. Taeil jerked around quite a bit as if he got lost in his thoughts and yanked back out once he processed the ball in the air above him. His strained expression showed something was troubling him and keeping him uneasy throughout the game. He didn’t seem as shaken as before, but the way he quickly rushed out of the gymnasium after the game ended said otherwise.
You were helping your boss clean up the equipment on the sidelines and load the pictures onto the school laptop when Johnny came jogging over before heading to the locker room. “What’s up with Taeil?” you inquired as Johnny grabbed an extra copy of the roster and a pen.
“He didn’t really tell us much but I think it’s got to do with his girlfriend,” he shared. “She’s in my cinematography class and she was acting kinda weird this past week too.” He handed you the paper and pen, “here, write your number on this and I’ll text you later tonight.”
Right, your garden photoshoot ‘date’. You quickly jotted down your number and handed the paper back to him. “Congrats on the win, you guys did good tonight! Go join the rest of them before they start getting suspicious.”
“Oh, they already are, don’t worry about that,” he teased with a wink. You felt yourself heat up at what he could be possibly hinting at but forced yourself to concentrate on the tasks in front of you. It was definitely not a good idea to be imagining a strong, sweaty Johnny holding you and kissing you and-
“Can you bring the laptop back to my office?” your boss requested.
“Yes! Of course!” you replied, possibly with a little too much enthusiasm.
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Johnny had sent a message, as he promised, which led to an hour of cheeky bantering before both of you decided to head to sleep since it was getting late. He continued texting you throughout the week and it only increased your excitement to see him again. Sometimes his messages got a little more suggestive but he was probably just being friendly. It’s not like you would know how he treated other girls.
But if he treated all girls in any manner similar to how he treated you, he would be a man of much chivalry and far more pleasant to be around than other guys his age. He gave you a ride to the garden and made sure to hold open any door standing within your path. On top of that, he hardly was on his phone and devoted most of his attention to you throughout the day.
He wore a pale pastel orange button-down shirt with white and yellow flowers on them, the coral color of the shirt bringing out the warmth of his skin tone even more in the late afternoon sunlight. “Oh my gosh! Where did Johnny go? I think I lost him in all these sunflowers!” you dramatically exclaimed when walking past an area filled with the tall yellow flowers just around his height.
He picked up on your skit and stopped in his tracks, clasping his hands together and calling out your name like a damsel in distress. “I seem to have lost track of my dear friend! How will I ever get out of this garden without a brave soul to escort me through it!”
You burst out into laughter at his histrionics. “Why are you so good at that?”
Johnny shrugged nonchalantly, “just watched a lot of movies and studied the actors.”
“Are you interested in becoming an actor someday?” you asked, easily picturing him in a classic romance film or maybe even a blockbuster action movie.
He tilted his head with a thoughtful expression. “Not really acting per se but maybe directing or filming. I enjoy being behind the camera more than I do being in front of it but if an opportunity comes my way to try acting, I wouldn’t turn it down.”
His major in creative media made a lot more sense knowing this information. You had noticed it on the team roster because it seemed a bit out of place compared to the rest of his teammates who were going into things related to health. “I think you’d do so good as an actor,” you admitted, “I would watch all the stuff you’re in.”
Johnny looking at you questioningly. “Anything? Even if it had a nude scene?”
“Sure.” You were flustered by the question but knew you would watch things he starred in. Especially if he had a nude scene.
“Hmm…interesting,” he eyed you with suspicion but continued walking through the garden without further explanation.
It was clear Johnny was awfully confident with his camera in hand and giving advice on how to pose in front of the various flowers. He didn’t hesitate to shower you with compliments and call you a range of things like ‘pretty, hot, sexy, cute, beautiful, amazing’ and nearly anything else you could possibly think of.
While looking at the stills on his display, you definitely had some favorites already but it seemed like Johnny had a few of his own. “Look, a flower among the other flowers,” he said cheesily, presenting a photo where you sat on a bench surrounded by smaller flowers in full bloom.
“Thank you.” Your cheeks heated up from his remark of admiration, causing you to quickly scroll through more photos to calm yourself down. “Hey, how about I get some of you? You’ve only taken pictures of me today. Let me repay you somehow.”
Johnny shook his head, “no that’s okay, I like taking photos of other people.”
“Come on,” you insisted, “you’re so attractive. How do you not want to show that off?”
“Me? Attractive? No way.” He couldn’t possibly be joking when he was this handsome, right?
“Please, Johnny? What about just as a way to remember this date?” you prodded, though quickly regretting your choice of words. “I mean this day itself, not like a ‘date’ date but just a day that we hung out together you know?”
He chuckled at your scramble for words. “I think I’d consider this a date. Wouldn’t you?”
“Uh, yeah, sure, I would too but like-”
“Here, take the camera before you embarrass yourself more.” He handed it over while going to find a spot that suited him. He ended up choosing the wall of sunflowers the two of you had passed by earlier. “Just me and my crew,” he joked when posing in front of them.
You tried to remember the way he had taken your pictures and how he coached you to position yourself during work. Quite honestly, the shots of him came out quite good but you weren’t sure if it was your doing or simply due to Johnny’s photogenic features. “If you were a flower, I’d pick you,” you proclaimed while giving his camera back.
“Not bad, not bad,” he mused, “pretty good, actually.”
“What? My photos of you or my pickup line?” you clarified.
“Both.”
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By the time you and Johnny were back in his car, golden hour began to set in and both of you had exchanged more than a sensible amount of pickup lines, even disputing how well some of them would work in certain situations. It was surprising how many casual ones he knew since most of yours took a turn to a more intimate side.
“Duuuuude, are you flirting with me?” he contended after you delivered quite a risky line.
“Maybe, I don’t know,” you teased, wanting to egg him on to see if he knew any.
Johnny hummed in thought before turning in his seat to face you. “Fuck me if I’m wrong but you want to kiss me, right?”
Your eyebrows furrowed as you processed what he just said. “...Gosh, that’s so forward holy shit.”
“But am I right?”
“Should I show you if you are?”
“Go ahead.”
You reached over and cupped Johnny’s face, bringing him closer while leaning in and planting a quick kiss on his lips before releasing him and sitting back into your seat. You wished it was possible to sink further into it and have it swallow you whole once the reality of your actions hit.
“Wow…I can’t believe you just went straight for the lips,” Johnny mused.
You immediately blurted out an apology. “Sorry, I should have asked first, I just thought-”
Johnny cut you off by placing his lips on yours and pulled away with a smile when he felt you reciprocate his kiss. “It’s okay, I liked it. I wouldn’t have said such a suggestive line if I didn’t think you were down for it.”
“You think I’d be down to fuck you? Like right here? Right now?” you gasped.
“No, not really but I wouldn’t be opposed to it,” he teased. “I definitely thought that you wanted to kiss me though, and I was right anyway.”
“Yes, yes you are,” you sighed exasperatedly. His flirty personality kept you constantly on your toes.
A brief silence fell upon the car until Johnny spoke again. “Do you want to try that again but for real this time?”
“Johnny Suh, you’re such a flirt aren’t you?”
“You know you want me.” With that, you met him over the center console as your lips felt his for the third time. This kiss felt warmer than the ones before it and the sincerity behind it was evident. His lips were soft and hot against yours though they never tried to take control. They danced with yours and followed your movements, allowing you to lead.
The kiss lasted only a few seconds but felt much longer because of how intoxicating it was. Purely because of your need for air, you broke away, though you didn’t go very far. Johnny noticed this and waited for you to catch your breath before diving back in and placing a hand around your thigh. He began pushing for more control, his teeth grazing the soft flesh of your bottom lip as if asking to go further. You gave way ever so slightly, waiting to see if he would take the bait but before he could-
Ring ring. His phone rang from inside his pocket.
“Shoot, sorry,” he hurriedly apologized while fishing his phone out using his free hand. He paused when he read the name of the person calling him, “it’s my roommate, sorry, I think I should take this.”
“It’s okay, go ahead,” you reassured him. A friend had once said if a guy felt comfortable enough to answer a call around you, it was a good sign in the relationship. But you weren’t technically with Johnny. He wasn’t yours and you weren’t his. It still must be a good sign though…right?
“Hey, where are you?” You recognized the voice on the other end of the line.
“I’m out at the botanical garden right now. Why? What’s up?”
“Oh, nothing. I just wanted to know where you were because normally you’re at home and I didn’t remember saying anything about going out.” His roommate was Ten from the volleyball team.
You thought it was cute how Ten cared enough about Johnny to call him like this. “Sorry, I thought I mentioned it to you.”
“Wait, are you with that girl you were telling us about? The one that was working during the game last week?” It was both shocking and admirable that Johnny had mentioned you to his roommate and possibly some other guys as well.
“Yeah, I am. She’s with me in the car right now,” he informed Ten.
“Oops, sorry dude,” Ten giggled, “did I interrupt something?”
“Kinda, yeah,” Johnny finally removed his hand from your thigh and you immediately missed the warmth from it. “You did.”
“Damn, Johnny! You get some! And hi, future bestie! You really managed to catch Johnny’s eye so I hope I get to meet you someday.” You looked to Johnny for permission to respond to Ten.
He held the phone out to you, giving you the chance to respond. “Hello! I swear I didn’t mean to steal him away from you.”
“Nah, it’s okay. You can keep him, he’s kinda weird anyway,” Ten bantered.
“That’s enough of that,” Johnny interrupted, pulling his phone back. “I’ll be back in a bit after I drop her off. Thanks for checking on me. See you at the apartment.” He promptly ended the call and tossed his phone into one of the cup holders in the center console. “He can be a handful at times.”
“Yeah, I know. I’ve seen you guys on the court together.” You remembered Ten’s exaggerated gestures when Johnny failed to return one of his volleys as they were warming up.
“Yeah,” Johnny echoed. “Well, I guess it’s time to drop you off.”
You pulled the seat belt over your shoulder while Johnny started the car. “Right.”
Despite the air conditioner blowing, the air felt still and stuffy with awkwardness. You couldn’t pinpoint where it came from, nor did you know how to get rid of it. So you simply sat in it and soaked in it, hoping it wouldn’t be a major setback in your relationship with Johnny even on a platonic level. It wasn’t until you had shut the door of his car and watched him drive off, that it felt as if you could breathe freely once more.
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Johnny and the rest of the team left for an away game the following week, leaving you slightly bored without his constant texts. It left you slightly anxious not fully knowing where you and Johnny stood after having kissed each other within just a month of meeting each other. Regardless, you decided to watch the live stream of Johnny’s game to support him and the rest of the boys.
Due to the time difference, when you had finally ended class and tuned into the stream, the game was already in its second set with the Spartans up once more against the opposing team. The match was maddeningly close, neither time falling more than five points behind the other and you felt so proud of your schoolmates.
As much as you wanted to watch the game, you still had chores to do around your apartment and went around doing them while treating the live stream as a podcast. You checked back in every few points to monitor the score, the cheers of the audience informing you of how long each play went.
You were heating up a late afternoon snack when the audience began talking amongst themselves, making you think it was a timeout. There wasn’t any music playing as there normally would be during the short break, so you took a quick glimpse at the stream only to find the Spartans huddled around one of their players who was lying on the floor.
It was frustrating that there was no way to enlarge the video and zoom in on the boys. The numbers on their jersey were not big enough to be transmitted clearly and it left you anxiously waiting to hear what happened. As the team helped the injured athlete up and brought him over to the seats at the sideline of the court, your heart sunk when you realized who it was.
There was a replay being shown in slow motion on the large screen in the gymnasium and you watched the ill-fated play. The opposite team’s outside hitter was preparing to attack, both Johnny and Jaehyun jumping to block. Johnny had come over from his centered position, the other team’s defensive specialist mirroring him in case the block was successful and the ball needed to be saved. The defensive specialist had taken large steps in their hurry to get into position and accidentally crossed the centerline.
Following a successful block from Jaehyun, their foot remained over the line just underneath where Johnny was coming down. Your middle blocker landed unsteadily, falling unsteadily to the left since that was the side interrupted by the opposing player’s foot. He crumpled to the floor, grabbing onto his ankle in pain while the play was kindly stopped by the opposing right-side hitter who caught the ball before their attack upon seeing a player down.
“Foot foul by the Huskies. Point given to the Spartans,” the PA announced, interpreting the motions from the referees. “Player substitution for the Spartans, number 94, Sehun Oh coming in for number 29, Johnny Suh, and number 28, Sicheng Dong coming in for number 33, Taeil Moon…timeout called by the Huskies.”
There was so much going on all at once, you could only imagine how shaken the team felt seeing one of their core members become injured. Sehun was a year older than Johnny and was a senior like Taeil, though he was hardly put in because he was not as skilled as his younger counterpart. You weren’t very familiar with him but you knew there wasn’t any bad blood since Sehun and Johnny often fooled around together during practice. But again, Sicheng was being substituted for Taeil and you wondered if this was still due to his recurring lack of focus.
It was an odd mix of players on the court for the Spartans and the team was split into two groups along the sideline. The active players received hurried instruction from their coaches given their new combination while Johnny was surrounded by the athletic trainers and a few of his other teammates offering help where they could.
The game resumed after the short intermission and the Spartans lost the lead they previously held over the opposing team. There was a lot more noise coming from the team as they tried to find a rhythm amongst themselves and communicate who would be doing which touch. You couldn’t help but stare at the bottom corner of the screen where Johnny sat, getting his ankle wrapped. When the set concluded in favor of the Huskies, you saw him being helped off his chair and presumably to the locker room where he could rest out of view.
You struggled to pay attention to the rest of the game, your thoughts constantly wandering over to Johnny. Even though you knew he was not seriously injured since he had managed to hobble off with help from Kun and Doyoung, your worries got the best of you and were driving you insane. What if he couldn’t play for the rest of the season? They still have a few games left but Sehun could probably cover for him. What if he ended up not being able to play for the remainder of his college career? No one else was given the middle blocker position though it was always possible to train another player or recruit someone to the team.
Before you knew it, the match concluded with the Spartans winning a long battle of three sets to two. You turned off the stream and focused your attention on completing assignments but your mind refused to stay put. It was getting late in the afternoon, almost nearing evening, but you still had time until things were due at midnight. Putting on your favorite comfort videos, you spent a while watching those to calm down. At some point, you finally felt peaceful enough to resume your work.
You went to sleep uneasily that night with Johnny remaining in your consciousness. Even when you woke the next morning, he was quick to return. You sent him a message letting him know you watched the live stream and hoped he recovered soon. He responded almost immediately, thanking you for watching his game and saying that he wasn’t in too much pain though he did have to use crutches even past when the team gets home in a few days. You pledged to help him when he came back which he responded to with a simple ‘haha thank you’.
This simple interaction was enough for you to get your fill of him and you didn’t want to disturb him any further so you went about your day as best as you could. There was a basketball game that you were scheduled for and it seemed like all your coworkers had heard the news about Johnny’s incident. Luckily, they did not linger on the topic for too long but there was something inside you both nervous and excited for his return.
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You had nearly jokingly offered your help to Johnny, not expecting him to actually take you up on your offer by the second day he was back. He had called you during lunch when he knew you had a break in the middle of your classes and asked if you could come over to his apartment at the end of the day.
He claimed he was pretty much bedridden and without the help of Ten, he had a hard time even moving around his room. Plus with there being practice later, he knew Ten would not be around until later in the evening and he was not ready to struggle on his own for that long. You stayed true to your promise and told him that you’d be there after your classes finished with food and a few of his favorite snacks.
It was your first time going over to his apartment though you did have a few friends who lived within the same building so it was not hard to find your way to his unit. Johnny said Ten had left the door unlocked, both a smart yet dangerous decision since it’s not like Johnny could really defend himself if an intruder came in though it saved both of you the trouble of figuring out how to let you inside.
“Johnny, I’m here,” you loudly announced, not wanting to startle him.
“I’m in my room,” he called out. You followed the sound of his voice to the third door down the hallway, the only one open, which made sense. Johnny was dressed comfortably in a grey hoodie sporting the university’s name and logo along with matching black sweatpants that were hiked up on his left side to leave room for the brace he wore. Upon seeing you in his doorway, his face lit up despite immediately greeting you with an apology. “Sorry for making you come to help me, I know you probably have better things to be doing right now.”
“No, don’t be sorry. I offered my help and I’m happy to be of assistance,” you reassured him while leaning on his doorframe. “What would you like to do first, now that we can get you out of bed.”
“Uhhh, I have to pee,” Johnny sheepishly admitted.
You laughed as you took a seat next to him on his bed and helped him to stand up, supporting a portion of his weight through his arm placed around your shoulders. “Alright, let’s get you to the bathroom.”
It was really a team effort with him guiding you over to his crutches leaning against the wall and then you functioning as his hands once he was properly situated with them. Fortunately, once the two of you made it to the bathroom next to his room, he did not require assistance actually using it. You already skipped a few checkpoints in your relationship with him but you weren’t sure if you wanted to jump that far ahead.
Getting him to and from the bathroom was the hardest task that you completed for him. Everything else he had you do was comparably simple, like filling up his water bottle or grabbing something from the living room or Ten’s room. About an hour and a half went by where you sat next to him, both of you with your laptops out and working on school assignments.
The quietness was strangely comfortable and oddly enough, it felt like you were able to focus better than when you chose to work in the library. Maybe it was because there weren’t people bustling around or maybe it was just because Johnny was with you. If anything, you would have expected his presence to have the opposite effect, but that was not the case.
At a certain point, the two of you lost interest in working and decided to call it quits for now and opted to watch a drama on Johnny’s TV instead. “It’s called Dear.M,” he informed you when you asked for the title. “Jaehyun kinda looks like one of the actors in it.” While the first episode played out, you saw what he meant. The lead male, named Minho, really did remind you of the endearing outside hitter, even down to the way the character was being portrayed.
“Aww, that’s so cute,” you cooed when Minho gave his hoodie to the female lead and she got absorbed in the scent of it. “I would so do that too, not gonna lie.”
“Here, you can have mine,” Johnny suggested, though he didn’t give you much of a choice, already taking off the hoodie he was wearing and revealing a plain black shirt underneath. You used it more so as a blanket or a pillow, clutching it against your chest for comfort. “Cute,” he quietly commented.
You watched the next few episodes with him, enraptured by the plot of Jaehyun’s look-alike pining after the female lead with his efforts going unnoticed. “Man, I would love to have a guy like that as my boyfriend,” you mused, “literally what is she doing? She’s missing out!”
“You could have me, I’m pretty much just as good, right?” Johnny put forth. “I think we’d look nice together.”
Because of his naturally playful and flirty nature, you couldn’t tell if he was serious or not. You squinted ever so slightly at him, “are you offering to be my boyfriend right now?”
“Well, when you put it that way…yeah, I guess I am,” he confirmed.
You were still hesitant to believe him. “For real?”
He nodded. “Yes, for real. I’d love to take you on more dates and be your dorky boyfriend if you allow me.”
You inwardly thanked the universe for somehow making Johnny interested in you. “I would love that, too.”
“So, uhh…will you be my girlfriend?” he asked, holding his hand out.
“It would be an honor.” You placed your hand in his and he gently brought it up to his lips before leaving a kiss on the back of it, making you smile giddily.
Johnny chuckled at your expression. “Sorry that we already had our first kiss a while back, but how about we try it again.”
“Oh my gosh, you’re so cheesy,” you teased though you followed his gestures to seat yourself in his lap.
His large hands held you securely at your hips while your arms found their way around his broad shoulders. “I’ll make you so happy, I promise,” Johnny murmured while placing a kiss on your cheek before capturing your lips. They felt familiar and warm against yours, the tenderness of his lips making you feel ever so safe and allowing you to get lost in the moment.
Both you and Johnny were so taken up by each other that neither of you heard the sound of the front door opening until there was a complaining voice coming from the doorway. “I know I said I wanted to meet her, but I didn’t mean like this, Johnny. At least tell me when you’re gonna have people over so I can clean up or something.”
Johnny was breathing heavily when the two of you quickly broke apart. “Dude, why do you have to be so nosy? You could have just minded your own business and gone to your room.”
“I was going to ask if you wanted pasta for dinner but I guess I won’t order for you,” Ten scoffed. “Do you like red sauce or white sauce?” he asked, nodding over to you.
“No, sorry, I want pasta too,” Johnny interjected.
“Has he asked you out yet?” Ten inquired, clearly not wanting to talk to his roommate. “I’ll only get him food if he confessed to you because that’s all he’s been talking about for the past week.”
“He did,” you confirmed. “But really? The entire week?” You looked between the two volleyball players.
Ten enthusiastically nodded, “absolutely would not shut up about how happy he was that you watched the game.”
You looked over at Johnny who was playing with the strings of his sweatpants, “aw, that’s so cute!” You leaned over to kiss his cheek.
“Okay, no, ew. Stop,” Ten warned, shielding his eyes. “Both of you stop or else I won’t be ordering food for either of you.”
“Man, she’s my girlfriend, not yours,” Johnny spoke up, “we’ll do what we want.” He reached over your shoulders and turned you to face him, hastily kissing you in the most obscene way possible.
You heard Ten let out a yell of disgust and slam Johnny’s door shut. When Johnny released you from his hold, the two of you shared a laugh about the situation. “So I’m guessing we have to order our own dinner.”
Johnny flicked his hand, showing his apprehension to the issue. “Dinner can wait. We should finish what we were doing earlier,” he insinuated with a sly smirk.
“Right, of course,” you agreed, “how could I have forgotten?” You fell back into his embrace, his touch, as if it were the only thing you needed.
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If you liked this, you may also like: L.Taeyong - Stuck With You
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My top 15 kpop albums of 2023
It's been a year since I posted something. At this point, I feel I'm only writting to keep a record for myself of my favorites of the year. Still, if anyone cares to read this, know I've posted my favorite korean music and dramas of the year every year since 2016. First up, my favorite albums of 2023.
15. Heize-Last winter. I've honestly been in a Heize break for almost two years because I felt her songs started to sound too much alike but this album got me excited for her music once again. It has bearly been a week since it came out so I did hesitate including it but I think it portrays my favorite style of hers so at the end I was like "yeah, it deserves a spot". Forget me not feauturing BIG NAUGHTY's beautiful vocals is my favorite song of the album. However her title, a collab with 10 cm, is a close second. Picnic of the Night gives us a more uptempo beat and Chan's sweet vocals are so relaxing. I think I will be listening this album a lot in the next few months.
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14. PENOMECO-Rorschach (Part 1). Ever since Penomeco entered my radar I have loved pretty much everything he has released. I do prefer his more chill music but this year he brought us more of his hip hop side and released two mini albums called Rorschach, both could have easily made my list but I think at the end of the day I like the album he released in april a bit more, and he does have two songs with Zico in this one, which did tip the balance for me. As I said, I do like his more layback music so my favorite song is Margiela feauturing Paul Blanco. The album starts with strong beats with Boy Pablo (2019) and stays on track with his title song Rindaman feauturing Zico. His other collab with Zico: Pew! is also a fiery song. As is Bubble. He slows down for his other three songs and they all are such a great listen.
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13. TREASURE-Reboot. I think TREASURE has had really bad luck, from their delayed debut to the ups and downs lately. The thing is I've always prefered those groups I actually feel excited to listen to their whole albums and TREASURE has really delivered in all of them as far as I'm concerned. People keep saying YG is holding them back by making them have the typical YG songs like BONA BONA or STUPID on this album but since I'm a fan of those kind of songs so I really look forward to it. However it was the songs by their subunits I actually liked the most MOVE is just such an exciting song and THE WAY TO by the vocal unit is just my kind of ballad. To be fair listening to Jungwoo and Jihoon sing is such highlight for me on all of their songs. I just love their tones.
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12. Taeyeon-To. X. 2023 was a year where I really got into Taeyeon's discography. So I was really excited for this comeback. The title To. X is a fun midtempo break up song. I would have liked Melt Away more as the title but I did love both songs. This is also a recent release so I moved it up and down in my list a lot. I'm also having a hard time picking a favorite song. I also enjoy listening to Fabolous with the quorky beat and witty lyrics but I think I actually liked all the tracks equally.
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11. VIXX-CONTINUUM. VIXX has changed a lot over the last few years but somehow this album with only Leo, Ken and Hyuk sounds very much like VIXX used to sound in 2015. They really stand on their own and all of their voices are amazing. However I've always had a soft spot for Leo and his vocals in Lilac are just heavenly. Probably why I love that ballad so much. I was actually surprised with Hyuk's low vocals that give a needed twist to Leo and Ken's power vocals. All five songs in this mini album are so good. The title is Amnesia and the MV aesthetic is obviously inspired by the movie Dune.
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10. NCT DOJAEJUNG-Perfume. This release kind of blind sighted me. I never thought Doyoung, Jaehyun and Jungwoo would come together in a subunit so in that sense they reminded me of the time I heard EXO CBX was debuting. I really love the title Perfume. It's one of those rare times the title is actually my favorite song of the album. I thought they would do a ballad for their title but the fact it was an upbeat sexy song was unexpectedly right. Doyoung is my favorite NCT vocalist so listening to him this whole album was such a joy. Jaehyun's vocals can be a bit overlooked in NCT127 just because Douyoung and Taeil are so amazing. Listening to him have more time in this album to shine was exactly what I wanted. I love Jungwoo's personality and honestly I was afraid he would get a bit lost in this album but my worries were unnecessary. Often I found his low notes were that little bit of spice the songs needed in this album. I loved all the bsides but Dive and Strawberry Sunday were specially a fun listen. And of course they had to do a traditional SM ballad (Ordinary) which is just beautiful.
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9. D.O.- Expectation. I'll never stop wishing for EXO's Kyungsoo to do an r&b album but his heart is in easy listening heartfelt songs so I can't complain. I'm just happy to get anything from him as a solo artist. This mini album has so many pretty songs. I do is my favorite hands down and one of my most played songs of the year but Lost (both the acoustic and the regular version) is such a fun song to listen to and could have easily become the title. The vocals and the melody are so powerful. Ordinary days and The view also have a fun melody. The title Somebody is really catchy and the MV is so sweet.
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8. TXT- The name chapter: Freefall. I have to confess I haven't gotten into TXT's content. I just came to like them gradually in the last couple of years and there was so much to catch up on that I haven't really get to know the members at all but the albums are a different story. Deep down is my favorite of the album but Happily Ever After is also a highlight. The title Chasing the Feeling gave us a fun retro beat and the chorus was really addicting. I also found Skipping Stones to be an interesting song. Love the guitar and bass on that one and the vocals by Beomgyu, Taehyun and Huaningkai are just heavenly. And of course the collab with The Jonas Brothers was a bit unexpected yet exactly what I didn't know I wanted.
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7. Zion.T-Zip. This was almost out of my list because I just listened to it a week ago, but I had to add it. Zion. T is just so unique and entertaining to listen to. His collab with AKMU called V is my favorite. But as expected, this is a no skip songs with great use of instruments, beats, vocals and occasional rapping. He even released three MVs for this comeback (Stranger, V and Unlove). The album is 10 tracks long yet only sums up 26 minutes. Thank u featuring Yun Seokcheol is also a highlight.
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6. V-Layover. To be honest, I was not excited for V's solo stuff. I was expecting a lot from Jungkook and Jimin but not from him. I don't know why. So it was so surprising when I actually wasn't excited with the songs they released but I really loved V's album. It's my fault really because I do tend to overlook Taehyun's vocals when listening to BTS. The sound he went for it's exactly my kind of music. Layover just feels sophisticated. Blue is definitely my go to song with its fancy r&b sound and Love me again has my favorite beat of the album. Slow Dancing is so sweet and For us takes you in a journey. The album is only 5 songs but from the first listen I knew it would make my top 10 of the year.
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5. NCT 127-Fact Check. For me, this is the first NCT127 no skip album. I liked LIMITLESS a lot but even that one has a couple of songs that are just not for me. NCT 127's titles are either a huge hit with me or they rub me off, this time around I found Fact Check so addicting. I love Space's melody but Misty is my favorite overall. Everyone's vocals are on point but Taeil is such a wonder to listen to on that one. Love is a beauty is also a great ballad. Parade might be a hiphop heavy song but Doyoung's beautiful vocals really stand out to me. And Angel Eyes gave me a bit of NCT U's With you vibes. I love Mark's parts in Je ne sais quoi then again everyone sounds so good in that song.
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4. Taeyang-Down to Earth. Taeyang came back with a bang. Every song on the album feels so big. I wasn't a fan of the title VIBE featuring BTS's Jimin on the first listen, but it really grew on me. The chorus just pops in my head from time to time out of nowhere. Shoong featuring Blackpink's Lisa is amazing, and the performance video is crazy good. Seed is the power ballad of the album. Nightfall featuring Bryan Chase is also a highlight with its retro pop beat and beautiful vocals.
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3. Taemin-Guilty. The void Taemin left while he was in the military could not really be fulled by anyone else. He's just different. And yes, a lot of it is the performance but the music always comes first. This album is only six songs but they all are so good. Not gonna lie, the first time I heard The Rizzness I was confused because the strong beat and rapping surprised me. I didn't know if I liked it but it really grew on me after hearing it a couple of times. I'm obsessed with She loves me she loves me not and its playful melody plus it's definitely my most played track of the album. Not over you and Blue takes us in a dreamlike journey.
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2. Red Velvet-Chill Kill. I was surprised to realize this is the only album from a girlgroup I liked this year. I even forced myself to listen to some albums of the most popular girlgroups right now but it's just not my kind of music. However this album is straight up my alley. A Velvet R&B album. I hadn't enjoyed a Red Velvet album so much since The Perfect Red Velvet. My favorite Red Velvet comebacks are always the one with a creepy twist so Chill Kill was on point with that strong beat paired with a sweet chorus. Knock knock (who's there) is a seemless follow up to Chill Kill. Underwater is one of my favorites for sure but these days I keep going back to Nightmare. Iced coffee and One Kiss have catchy chorus while Wings is uplifting with beautiful vocals.
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1. EXO-EXIST. My Spotify Wrapped top 5 songs belong all to this album. It's actually the first time it happens. Despite me being an EXO-L, some pop or indie songs are usually in the mix, but I guess I missed EXO. They just did all the things I love in an EXO album: r&b, beautiful harmonies, and fun beats. I keep changing my favorite song of the album. At first, it was Regret it just because the production is so great. Then I was like, actually, all the falsetto and runs in Cinderella makes it my favorite. Yet I kept feeling No makeup was the perfect r&b EXO song, so I thought: that one for sure! But of course, the title Cream Soda is so catchy, and the chorus is expectacular, so obviously, that's the one. Nevertheless, Love fool is so much fun to listen to, and I do love Sehun and Chanyeol's verses in Another Day. Then why is my most played song of the year Let me In? And what about Hear me out that makes me happy every time I listen to it? Don't even get me started on Private Party's lyrics! Anyway, you get the idea, so just do yourself a favor and check out this album.
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