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#mysophobia
sweetstove · 8 months
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[TW: DEREALIZATION, BODY HORROR, MYSOPHOBIA, DISASSOCIATION, DEPERSONALIZATION] It's all just shapes
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3
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angstytgcfthoughts-2 · 7 months
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You know that snippet in the extra where XL loses his memory that he refuses to drink out of the teacup because it has a stain?
To me, that doesn't come off as spoiled prince being a spoiled prince. XL seems genuinely frustrated with himself for being unable to drink the tea.
I winder if it roots deeper? Was prince XL wary of dirt? It seems unlikely because of the Hong'er situation but. Aside from that?
Was he mysophobic? I wonder how hard it must have been to settle into the life of a peasant of he was.
-♤
OMG I NOTICED THAT TOO! I thought I was the only one!
Did freshly fallen XL have trouble with work on the street? Did he unintentionally pull back from dirty things? How many times did he make up excuses to FX&MQ and his parents because he was embarassed/didn't want to worry them?
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aspergirl2022 · 2 months
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Gloves Whump
-Whumpee wearing gloves to hide an injury or an artificial limb
-Whumpee having mysophobia/germophobia (fear of germs) and wearing gloves as a consequence
-Whumper only touching Whumpee with gloves as a way of dehumanisation
-Medical Caretaker wearing gloves so they can treat Whumpee’s injuries safely
-Caretaker who put gloves to handle something dangerous for everyone (product or object)
-Caretaker or Whumpee force to wear gloves because of some allergies
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hadeantaiga · 5 months
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Cleaned my lizard's cage and now I'm freaking out about germs.
I washed my hands a trillion times while doing it and wiped down the counter with bleach wipes and scrubbed the sink. But like. I smelled it. What if there are germs in my lungs now?
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Mysophobia Pride Flag
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Mysophobia, also known as verminophobia, germophobia, germaphobia, bacillophobia and bacteriophobia: a pathological fear of contamination and germs.
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bbyaksha · 2 years
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𓂃୭̥ mysophobic!sakusakiyoomi
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genre ꒰ mental health induced panic attack, angst(?).
▧ trigger warnings ⇢ discussion of mental health (specifically mysophobia & a panic attack), self-doubt, self-degradation (talking down on oneself).
message to minors ༺ my content is not intended for you, do not interact.
⋆୨୧˚ word count ⋮ 931.
preview ➛ ❝ if only he hadn’t been so careless. ❞
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there are times when sakusa kiyoomi is certain he’s going to die.
these moments, much like waves, come and go. flowing in before, naturally, pulling back out— differing between higher and lower tides.
today, he thinks, is drastically high tide.
his body is crouched into as small of a ball as he can muster with his forehead tucked onto his knees. his hands mirroring those of a surgeons in preparation for surgery. it must be a comical sight, he presumes, how his six-foot-something body curls in on itself in some weird balancing act.
maybe someone’d laugh if they saw him right now. perhaps they’d write it off as someone just playing around and testing their own abilities— maybe he looks more ‘silly’ than he does ‘crazy’.
he definitely feels the latter. rationally knowing that his physical reactions aren’t necessary nor the socially correct way to respond to this situation, yet here he is; muttering to himself broken words of affirmations in between hiccups.
they’re clean, he finds himself promising, i cleaned them.
that is true. he did clean them. he washed his hands for seventeen minutes and thirty seven seconds. he used three different pumps of soap in five batches. he did everything correctly, his hands are one-thousand percent squeaky clean.
they wouldn’t be burning if they’re clean.
he’s right. they never burn when they’re clean. when he has them tucked tightly in his pockets, the zippers closing right around his wrists so nothing could possibly blow in, his skin doesn’t feel like it’s melting. so they must not be clean. they must not be at all. in fact, they hurt more now than they did before he washed them.
that’s only because my skin is raw.
he’s also correct in that point. he always washes in excess, his hands bright red and pruned as his clothed elbow nudges the faucet closed. raw skin hurts— it stings with even the slightest movement. that must be why they burn so much. it’s not because they’re dirty. it’s because they’re clean.
if they’re clean, then why won’t you touch yourself?
it’s a valid question. if he truly knew he was clean, as he has been telling himself, he shouldn’t feel like vomiting every time the thought of touching the fabric of his pants crosses his mind. he shouldn’t feel like his own hands will bring him harm if they do anything besides tremble within the air.
he feels so weak. situated within a stalemate in an argument against himself. powerless against his own mind as it tortures him with venom-laced threats of illness that he gave himself access to.
if only he hadn’t been so careless. if only he hadn’t just brushed off the alarms blaring in his head before he’d borrowed the pencil. if only he’d remembered to bring his own, like he’s always done.
he wouldn’t have given you one if it wasn’t safe.
he knows he wouldn’t have. komori’d always been the one person to ensure his mental and physical safety. always offering unopened packages, wiping things down before he’d arrive, asking people to stay at a distance when he’d been too nervous to say something himself. komori’d never force steps, he’d never do something behind his back— the pencil must be safe.
his arms ache. almost mirroring the same throbbing sensation as his palms. he should bring them in, tuck them under his legs against his shins. at least they’d be further from his face. he can’t get sick if they don’t touch his face.
i won’t get sick even if they do.
his lungs feel as though they’re inhaling glass shards. cutting, ripping, tearing out his body with each coming breath. yet he’s not crying anymore. the choked sobs have dissipated into sniffles and coughs as a numbness washes over the entirety of his body. inside and out.
pins and needles swarm his hands, his arms. the boiling gone as fast as it came. it’s in moments like this where he feels the most stupid. moments where his body shows him he panicked for nothing. moments that make the trauma his brain was putting him through feel fake.
his body still trembles as he retracts his arms back to his form, folding them neatly under his knees as he’d previously decided on. his heart rate hadn’t even quivered at the motion. no pain, no thoughts, no illness.
he’s fine. it’s fine. he’s safe.
though, sometimes he believes that truth is worse than any flu he could imagine.
it was always fine. he was always safe.
it’s not him being dramatic, is it? it’s not a temper-tantrum due to not having his own things or way? the waves of terror and nausea aren’t just a result of a change he couldn’t control?
there are times when sakusa kiyoomi is almost certain he’s going to die. times where he’s so violently nauseous that it puts the worst case of seasickness to shame—
but at least seasickness had validity.
it can be seen and felt, a common thing amongst the billions of people in the world.
at least seasickness doesn’t come in dangerous waves and whirlpools, just to calm entirely half a second later.
at least seasickness doesn’t leave the host questioning their own emotions and self-trust.
“sakusa?” his head snaps up at the sounds of his name, meeting gazes with the brunette in the doorframe. komori’s soft, knowing eyes almost bring him to tears again— but it was his words that pushed him over:
“ i’m sorry i didn’t let you open the package first. ”
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fastbrain · 8 months
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I'm gradually teaching myself that it's okay not to shake hands with people.
I work in a corporate environment, so it is difficult, but I deflect a bit of stress for every time I don't have to think about washing my hands.
A hand-on-heart "I won't shake your hand, but it's great to meet you" is generally accepted without question!
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charlietulips · 1 month
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hello people with germophobia/contamination ocd
i’ve been struggling with a fear of germs for a long time now but lately i can hardly do anything without crying about things being dirty. it’s really messing up my life.
if you have any tips on how to get better please share 🙏
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Not sure if it's trauma related or if I have mysophobia:
But does anyone else disinfect their toilet seats, when they know someone else used it before?
And has the urge to throw up, when there are hairs in the bathroom sink?
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aroaceconfessions · 2 years
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im aro and i've only been in one relationship before, in middle school/beginning of high school, and it was very toxic and traumatising but idk if that actually matters. while in that relationship i was obviously very different and young, but also my mental health was worse than now and during the past years i've worked on it and i started enjoying company and intimacy with my friends.
so now, i still hate people touching me for various reasons and mostly not even trauma related (autism, mysophobia, etc), but since i havent had another romantic relationship since then i dont know what my actual boundaries would be now. i have bad emotional permanence and all, so i dont really know how i feel about something unless im feeling it, and often my thoughts/daydreams about a certain thing will be different from how ill actually act in that situation.
okay, after having said all that, the problem is i dont know if i'd actually like doing some of the things that made me uncomfortable in that relationship right now, with a platonic partner for example. now im okay with hugging (god i love hugging people im close to), cuddling a bit and expressing my affection, though it's not easy said face to face. and while in that relationship i was SO uncomfortable with hugging, touching, holding hands sometimes, kissing omg, and saying "i love you" out loud.
i know (or at least i think i know) that that discomfort is a mix of the problems i listed before and my aromanticism, but it's really difficult to draw the line right now. same with sex. im acespec and i know i wouldnt like it for the most part, but i dont even know if what i think i could endure would make me uncomfortable too.
*screams in frustration*
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sweetstove · 8 months
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[TW: DEREALIZATION, BODY HORROR, MYSOPHOBIA, DISASSOCIATION, DEPERSONALIZATION] It's all just shapes
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3
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staydandy · 2 years
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Clean With Passion For Now (2018) - 일단 뜨겁게 청소하라!! - Whump List
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List by StayDandy Synopsis : Jang Sun Gyeol has wealth and good looks but suffers from severe mysophobia. He is obsessed with cleaning and even owns a cleaning company. However, he meets a carefree and untidy girl named Gil Oh Sol after she enters his company as a new employee. (MDL) AKA : Clean Up Like It's Hot | First, Clean Passionately
Whumpee : Jang Sun Gyeol played by Yoon Kyun Sang
Country : 🇰🇷 South Korea Genres : Business, Comedy, Romance
Notes : This is a Partial List - I didn't list every bit of whump, just what caught my attention the most • Adapted from the webtoon "Clean with Passion for Now?!" (일단 뜨겁게 청소하라?!) by Aengo (앵고) • There is also a Chinese adaption, Use for My Talent (2021)
Related List : Use for My Talent (2021)
Episodes on List : 3 Total Episodes : 16
*Spoilers below*
08 : Sun Gyeol has a panic attack
12 : Sun Gyeol’s mother attempts surprise shock therapy, Gyeol collapses
15 : Pushed to the brink, Sun Gyeol reverts back to his old OCD ways & gets so upset he’s in a car accident
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Told my ma about how my mysophobia is getting worse & I’m thinking of getting gloves and.
she licked me.
She pulled me in for a hug after I was crying. She comforted me and said she’d research how to help.
And then she fucking LICKED MY FACE
and then laughed like it was a joke
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Me: *trying to work out if they don’t set off my mysophobia because I love them, or if I love them because they don’t set off my mysophobia*
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myso-entity · 1 month
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existence is unbearable when your brain convinces you that everything is diseased and that bad things will happen to you if you come in contact with them.
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sunohws · 2 months
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I HATE HAVING MYSOPHOBIA... I can't go on go anywhere without my sanitization kit. Not even on dates, I WANT TO SEE CUTE GUYS AND GO ON A CUTE PICNIC DATE, WITH FLOWERS AND YUMMY SANWHICHES WITH CUTE MUSIC BUT IM AFRAID OF DIRT AND THE AMOUNT OF BACTERIA IN IT...
Sighs this isn't okay. I always forget I'm in medical school so I wouldn't really have time for a cute date anyway. WAIT DO U THINK SOOBIN WOULD WANT A COOL, FUNNY AND SMART ASD NEUROSURGEON BF????
CUS LIKE I GRADUATE FROM UNI IN 3 YEARS... WE COULD MAKE I HAPOEN.
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