A Sunny day in Delacroix
A small ficlet for @samtember2022 Day 26 - Rainy day/cosy
Bucky is going on a picnic and Sam doesn't like it at all, but he has a plan and asks his friend for help.
"You need me to do what? " Thor must have missed something, because Sam sent him a message with their secret code for emergencies, and then dropped this on him.
"You heard me the first time" Sam, was already irritated with his friend because he knew Thor was going to drag this forever. Sam just needed him to do this, no questions asked, but that wasn't happening apparently.
"I did, but I'm still not sure what you meant by 'I need you to make it rain'...", Thor was pretty sure this didn't qualify as an emergency.
"Thor, I've never asked you for anything ever, please just do this one thing for me" Sam said softly.
"Sam..." Thor started.
But Sam was already interrupting him "If you can make thunder, technically, you can make it rain"
"That's not how it works Sam, you texted code red for this?? Code red is supposed to be for emergencies like an alien invasion, or half of the city being about to be blown off. Why would you need rain anyway? The sun is shining, you should be happy." Thor was still trying to make sense of this whole conversation
"This IS an emergency, Bucky just left, he's going on a date and I need to stop it", Sam said, as if Thor was supposed to understand what this meant.
"Sam, I'm going to need you to stop talking in circles, be straight with me"
"Bucky is going on a date"
"...and?"
"And I need to stop it, they're going on a picnic and I need to stop it" Sam responded.
"You're kidding me right?" Thor thought for a minute that he should pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming this conversation.
"Are you going to help me or not?" Sam said with determination. Thor was lost.
"Since when are you and Barnes an item?"
"We're not, I just don't want him going on dates with other people".
"So, what's your plan here, to sabotage all his dates for the rest of his life?"
"I haven't thought that far, I just need to stop this one before I can set up another plan."
"Sam, you do realize how insane this is, right?"
"Yes, I do. So, are you going to help or not?"
"Of course I am, Sam, I've never refused to help Captain America, and I won't start now, just know that I don't approve of this plan. But I support your nonsense for better or for worse". Thor said solemnly, being his dramatic self.
"Thank y.." Sam was only focusing on Bucky's date, he didn't care what Thor thought about his plan.
Thor interrupted him "But you owe me a dinner date, and I get to be the Best Man at your wedding if this crazy plan of yours works out".
"Dinner first, I don't know if Bucky feels the same way"
"Yeah, right", Thor said, already thinking about the Best Man outfit he would wear to the wedding.
____
Sam was sitting in the living room, when Bucky opened the door to their shared house, soaking wet, and looking better than he ever did with his wet hair.
"Oh, you're back already?", Sam asked innocently,
"Yeah, it started raining before I even got there, we had to cancel our date. The weird thing is weather forecast announced sun for the whole week"
"You know, the weather is so unpredictable"
"I guess" Bucky agreed.
"I was going to watch Rings of Power re-run, we can watch it together if you want, since you liked the Hobbit, you'll like this one".
"Sure",Bucky was looking forward to this cozy afternoon home. If he was being honest, he didn't even want to go on this date in the first place, but he needed to get over Sam, because this thing with Sam would never happen obviously.
Sam and Bucky settled on the couch and started the show.
"Do you want some popcorn?", Sam said after 2 episodes.
"Sure why not"
Sam got up and went to the kitchen to prepare the popcorn.
Bucky kept watching the show because Sam had already seen it and didn't need him to pause, but Sam's phone started vibrating on the table.
Bucky didn't mean to snoop or check Sam's phone, but a message flashed on Sam's phone and something caught his attention. His name.
Bucky read the message quickly before it disappeared and it read "so how did it go with Bucky?" followed by a thunder and rain emoji. The most surprising thing was that the text was coming from Thor.
"You got a message" said dryly, when Sam got back.
"Oh, I'll check it later"
"From Thor" Bucky insisted.
Sam didn't say anything, and was a little afraid of checking his phone now, he didn't know what Bucky had seen exactly.
"You care to tell me why Thor is sending you texts about me, or will I have to ask him myself?" Bucky was getting irritated by Sam's silence.
"It's not what you think" Sam tried,
"And what am I supposed to think?"
"I asked Thor for a favor, and he helped me"
"And the service involved me obviously, so I would need you to tell me a little bit more"
"I can't"
"You know what Sam, I never know what to think with you, you say we have to be open with each other and then you do this"
Bucky stood up to leave.
"Where are you going?" Sam said as Bucky reached the door.
"I'm going for a walk. I can't do this right now"
"But it's still raining" Sam pointed out.
"I prefer the rain than whatever this is", Bucky mumbled, he didn't know what to think and was on the verge of tears, he didn't want Sam to see him like this.
"Bucky please", Sam pleaded, but Bucky was already out the door.
Sam grabbed a coat and an umbrella and went to look for Bucky.
It took Sam a while to find Bucky. He was walking by the docks, looking like he was lost in his thoughts.
Bucky slowed down when he saw Sam but didn't stop walking.
"Bucky, listen, I'm sorry",
"What are you sorry for? Sam, I don't even know what's happening. I just know that you're keeping secrets from me when you're the one who insisted best friends tell each other everything" Bucky sighed "You talk about me behind my back and I know that you would never do that to me, but I can't help but make up dozens of scenarios about how somehow I upset you and you felt like you couldn't talk to me, and had to confide in Thor instead". Bucky took a deep breath.
"Sam. If you have a problem with me, just tell me, I can handle it, you don't have to vent to your friends, I'm not some fragile child you have to tiptoe around, just tell me and I'll fix it.
"Bucky, I don't have a problem with you, you're perfect"
Bucky blushed at that, he hated when Sam talked like that because he always ended up craving for more "Then was is it?"
"I asked Thor to make it rain"
"What?" Bucky suddenly felt like they had switched to a completely different conversation without him noticing.
"I asked Thor to use his power to make it rain" Sam repeated "I knew your date was taking you to a picnic, and didn't want you to go, it made perfect sense to me at the time"
"You don't like Dave?" Bucky asked cautiously
"I don't care about Dave, but I care about you"
Bucky remained silent, not sure he understood.
"I'm so sorry Buck, when I thought about it it made perfect sense in my mind, but I realize now that it doesn't. I wasn't thinking, I panicked, I just knew I had to stop you from going on that date, and I lost it a little"
"What are you saying Sam?"
"I'm saying I love you, Bucky"
Bucky smiled and launched himself at Sam, because he had been waiting for this moment even though he never dared to hope that it would actually happen. Sam caught him and they kissed.
"You know, you're supposed to be the normal one in this relationship", Bucky said against Sam's lip, now that he had Sam all for himself, he had no intention of ever letting him go.
"We'll see about that," Sam smiled.
They walked home, finished the show, and both went to Sam's room instead of each walking to their own room like the previous nights.
Later that night, Sam sent a text to Thor saying "You'll be my Best Man for the wedding" and ended it with a wink face emoji.
Tags: Post-TFATWS, first kiss, jealousy, unrequited requited love, Sambucky, Thor Odinson.
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Okay, a little half mini meta thingy? I’m honestly very surprised that Bucky being suicidal hasn’t been brought directly in the movies/show. And I say this because his PTSD is basically the forefront of his character (other than his friendship Steve in the movies) and his arc in TFATWS was essentially mental health centered. So I do wonder why there wasn’t a tiny line drop or something.
And the MCU is not shy about the topic. In the early days, they had Bruce talk about his attempt, recently they showed Marc attempting and being saved by Khonshu. Also, despite it being a bit of a different situation, we were shown Zemo attempting suicide but T’Challa stopped him. If the mcu/Disney is willing to actually show suicide attempts, obviously they have no problem with talking about the matter.
And the reason why I’m so curious they didn’t mention anything for Bucky, is because it’s been brought up several times by crew members. Raynor’s actress specifically stated TWICE, in two different interviews, that Raynor is actively trying to get through to Bucky in therapy so he doesn’t commit suicide. The actress’s exact words being: “She wants to save his life. She knows if he doesn't do this, he is going to die. He will kill himself.” and “That's why she sees her work with Bucky as a life and death situation…. She can interpret just how bad it would be for him, and if he doesn't connect, he could die. As so many veterans do. PTSD is a horrible, horrible thing. If left to your own devices, if you go inside, you're just going to take your own life…..So her job is to not let him.”
One of the screen writers for the cap trilogy, Christopher Markus, was talking about Bucky’s character and said “Do you want to go on? Do you want to be free? Do you want to put a bullet in your head? What is it?". Seb Stan said in an interview “Bucky’s relationship with Steve may be the only thing stopping him from committing suicide.” And I’m 99.9% sure Seb said something along the same lines as that another time too.
It seems to be a pretty solid consensus amongst the people involved in the making of these movies/shows, that suicide is something that Bucky considers/struggles with. I mean, I do think that it was lightly implied in TFATWS (I could explain but that’s a post for another day) but l’m just begging the question of why they didn’t dive into that a bit, why it wasn’t explicitly stated? Especially since irl the risk factor for suicide in those with PTSD is EXTREMELY high. I mean, I’m not complaining that it wasn’t included, I’m just doin some wondering.
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