#my mom isn’t giving me any contact info for the np and doing all correspondence herself without talking to me so i have no control

[lindsaymendzs]

healthcare system + my mom thanks for nothing <3

#not to keep posting personal vents but i seriously have NO IDEA what i’m going to dooooo #my mom isn’t giving me any contact info for the np and doing all correspondence herself without talking to me so i have no control #the np is getting certified for her own practice in august so my mom isn’t letting me make an appt until then #which means i won’t be able to actually see her until AT LEAST the fall and like. that’s 7 more p*riods maybe more i can’t wait that long #i have no control over what happens when i’m on it idk what i’ll do what if i h*rt mys*of or somebody else or ruin a relationship #or destroy something i need or jeopardize a job or make a scene in public i am seriously sc*red!!! #and i’m not gonna be like mom i need to see her right now immediately bc i’m afraid i’ll **** myself while i’m on my period but like. #looking ahead at an expanse of half a year of this with no intervention when it’s been getting steadily worse every month for the past year #it’s so horrible and scary it feels like there is no hope and no way out #i’m a college graduate and fully grown woman i should be able to make a doctors appt when i fear for my health and safety on my own time!!!! #not be scared of the future and powerless to do anything abt it bc my mom won’t let me for no reason #i just like. ughhhhhh i just want to go to a fucking doctor #no i will not tell my mother why i need medical help immediately yes i will tell my near 1k tumblr dot com followers that’s my business #in conclusion i hate this and i cannot promise that i will shut up about it. goodnight #the ‘faith is losing her mind’ series continues next week #faithposting