Tumgik
#my favorite thing about movie Kyle is u can see how hard he has to work to rub his 2 braincells together & experience a Thought
tinykonig · 1 year
Note
Okay but my boy Gaz😩😩😩😩 I’m seriously going into 2023 manifesting that man. Can the ppl (me) get husband Gaz headcanons and how he’d treat his spouse? (I get the vibe he’d be all for princess treatment) Can there also be dad Gaz? <3
Im going to use this post for husband!gaz and ill make a seperate post for dad!gaz :))
sfw & nsfw below, afab reader
kyle is the definition of a devoted partner. the dream man!!!
like i said in his headcannons, his love language is quality time. he loves spending any time he can with his partner, and especially loves going on little getaways to new cities and destinations and spoiling them
he is more casual about dates. he will do the whole dress up and fancy restaurant thing but he much prefers eating fast food in his car and driving somewhere with a view listening to your playlists
OH MAN this boy will make u little dedicated playlists every once in a while and its so sweet :) titled like “my sunshine” “listen to this when you miss me” and its just songs that you guys discovered together on your drives
very thoughtful about gift giving! will remember if you prefer silver or gold jewelry, remembers your favorite foreign candies, etc
loves all the pet names. hardly calls you by your name its always love, darling, princess, baby
constantly taking photos of you ! keeps polaroids in his phone case, wallet, and on his walls
especially nsfw ones :))) particularly his cum on you. on your boobs, dripping out of you, on your ass
multiple rounds kinda dude. he sees his cum in/on you, hes hard again sorry
god he is all about body worship in this bedroom
praises you the entire time and a big fan of eye contact
he calls you all the time and most of the time it’s very innocent and asks oh about your day and gossips about price to you
but he is such a perv… sometimes your voice just turns him on and he will start touching himself while you are just talking about something you did that day
his breath will hitch and you just know
fucking cums in his pants if you jokingly shame him about it. like “i’m just telling you about my day and you have to stroke your dick? i know you aren’t that much of a perv, kyle,” and he GROANS
gaz can be subby sometimes, as a treat
how could you not indulge him in phone sex
if he does the grocery shopping by himself for some reason, expect to have so many snacks but no ingredients for any actual meals
and he is so bad at making lists he just goes to the store and raw dogs it
so now its a rule that you have to be present for grocery shopping- he is not to be trusted
he loves hosting at your guys’ house!!! especially wants to be the house to host christmas dinners
plays bartender all night and LOVES it
gifts from gaz are always very sentimental but unexpected. like getting you a bracelet that has his vows engraved in tiny tiny writing
he cries at meaningful moments, like at your wedding, during a reunion where he’s been gone for a while. he just gets choked up
in tune with his emotions and talks about how he feels very openly ( at least with you ) if he is worried about something he will always ask for your perspective and it helps him process things
because he can have a fiery temper sometimes so he really wants to work on seeing things from your point of view. never would gets physical or anything, but he can say some mean things or shut you out
when you notice him making progress in this you always praise him and let him know you recognize his efforts and suddenly he is all mushy
the guys know almost everything about you, even if you have never met them. he talks about you all the time
“what movie are we watching? oh yeah my partner loves that movie.” and “my partner makes the best fucking cookies in the world”
one time you got up in the morning before him and made a little breakfast for you both and when he woke up and saw that he teared up and said “im fond of you, you know?” and it was just so cute that now you both say that to each other for little things
he enjoys taking walks with you, particularly with to-go coffees in hand
people watches with you and you guys make up conversations that you think strangers are having
its his favorite pass-time honestly
back to sexy time
he really likes your neck, spends a lot of time there during foreplay. you have to be really diligent if you don’t want him to leave any marks there
loves being on the bottom when he is dominant. just sitting back and telling you what to do and how to do it and seeing you get tired/cock drunk is his favorite
steals a few of your panties to take with him when hes gone. hes a lowkey perv im telling yall
he asked you to marry him one night after like 4 rounds of fucking, he just could not hold it in anymore
promises to make it up to you with a romantic date later but tbh you didn’t mind
174 notes · View notes
grepfrutmeat · 2 months
Text
very messy and probably a little misheard notes from liquid mercury twitter space below the cut
the return of kyler and marter twitter space, later changed to liquid mercury (and possibly something else idk)
was kinda late not sure by how much. maybe 10~ minutes
martin is still blown away by something
-kyle says he cant wait for thing to happen (evil laughing)
-its one guy (..) suit
-talked about terrified fansong, martin really dug it
-felix felix you motherfuckwr (twf the musical
-we should make a really bad walten files musical
-we did that- “felix where are my kids da da da”
-joke twf musical
-fucking. imagine dragons okay martin.
-??? SET IT OFF WOLF IN SHEEP'S CLOTHING OKAY MARTIN
-eva mentioned about the three characters holding beer bottles together how she made a joke that its norman felix and Rory and people thought it was serious
-but rory is not real..
-martin “who the fuck is that”
-”you gotta stop listening to me. i lie” -eva
-it is now revealed lily is charles daughter
-it was so hard to keep it a secret
-accidentally mentioned on space but nobody noticed until like one person
-he dies on her birthday …
-knowing what happens to this character,
-being able to talk about “bon” is weird.
-martin loves this spectre
-g man comparisons
-martin had 2 inspirations for spectre, one being calculated how hal 9000 (i have no mouth i must scream guy??) expresses emotions like batman riddler, (the batman)
-eva made it subtler
-I WAS FUCKING RIGHT ABOUT THE BON FELIX PARALLEL IM WINNING IN WINNING
-”perhaps what i am is not as important as what i can offer you” pinnacle of bon
-handing boozoo mask to charles?
-what if bon is from the futureeeee (okay martin.)
-most of episode 4 was made a couple weeks ago lolll
-this episode is a miracle
(missed a bunch here)
-charles lines are really good
-the scene ;) the highlight of the episode
-episode 6 at his best
-progression of susan + charles va improving
-episode 6 is a turning point, traumatic event for characters one specific one.
-episode 6 gets as close as it can be to being a nightmare
-not analog horror scary, but like a chaotic nightmare that shouldn't be happen. horror movie-esque
-everything that can go wrong goes wrong, like a real nightmare.
-arin hanson nightmare. barnacles.
-episode 6 high stakes
-”bon” - fe lix (bon says felix at some point? woag maybe) , martin says he likes how bon says felix
-eva (spectre( has a monologue in 6
-episode 6 is awe some
-maritial status. divorced
-martin talks about charles divorce
-in 1974 he's divorced, recently divorced.
-his ex wife is named emily. divorced a few months before shit happens
-if Charles didn't go missing they might have resolved their relationship
-small bit talking to Emily in one episode. charles still loves ex wife but it didn't work out.
-charles close friends with ex wife but don't work as a couple
-martin says charles feels like what jack and felix could've been.
-charles is selfless,
-felix and linda split up would be better as friends cus they're not good as a couple
-charles knows this about his relationship but felix doesn't think this about his
-martin loves charles ;3
-he's already my favorite
-eva likes charles susan dynamic (i hear u)
-theyre two sillt friends having fun!!!
-dynamic war.
-(joke) “heyt guys. in the next episode. rory appears. and kills bom” “it was all a dream” “susan marries linda and Charles raises his kid and jack finds his kids. and is found” he was hiding in a box” (trumpet sounds)
-susan and charles are better friends than jack and felix
-jack and Felix don't get along as well as real friends. business relationship.
-kyle quotes jerma lolll
-felix and jack written as people that seem friendly and social but are isolated in their own ways
-jack is only entirely honest with rosemary
-felix just doesn't
-felix tries to hide addiction from jack and
-felix sees jack as someone he'd like to be, looks up to jack, affectionate to him and envious, wants to be on his good side so doesn't say anything to him. which is why jack didn't know.
-sophie jophie and jenny jophie joke…
-theyd rock paper scissors over last names
-jenny is better than sophie at rock paper scissors. lettersons.
-sophie would change to sophie Letterson like 100%
-highlight of the month was liking jelix art and everybody noticed …
-”jelix sloppy making out” “DONT SPOIL SIX” (joke)
-joke about charles looking horrified cus jelix making out in felix office lmao
-boozoos voice slightly tiny tim-ish COOL
qna part
-spectre is freakishly tall, skinny michael meyers
-spectres voice changes a lot, sometimes silly, depends on what he's saying/who he's talking to.
-spectre wont hide his motivation but he won't reveal it outright, he won't sit down and explain what he's doing, he’ll just do it.
-chris appears in photos, isn't really mentioned. Chris is someone who knows how to turn a situation in his favor, go-getter. has interesting dynamics with main characters later in series
-kyle can't wait for people to see what happens with Chris
-long way to go to show it, but chris apparently has a really cool design later on (1982)
-cant wait for people to see his role in 1982 . martin can't say why
-no correct understanding of chris but some people have very different expectations of who he is.
-chris is a silly-serious blend, similar to charles, less naive
-all they can say
-charles fact: something really fun about charles, he will always put his kid first more than anything. he brings her to work a lot (not gonna see this in series tho) everyone would play with her. dress up as pirates. :)
-felix would tell lily santa doesn't exist. LOLLL
-cant say something spoiler…
-G ROUND BREAKING REVALATION: FOR CONTEXT. Brian stells was the first human character to speak in twf. back in 2020. people would ship brian stells and sophie walten. but it was wrong angle. because yesterday. came to the realization. that brian would be into middle aged single mothers (technically rosemary…)
-brian would try to hit on rosemary??? and jack would grab his shotgun and shoot at him. okay martin. jack is a good shooter ??
-canon brian is jesse pinkman
-chris is more season 4-5 jesse pinkman.
(missed a lot)
-showstopper lore bon and banny friends but like. only cus bon wants to save face
-cybertelly would be the showstoppers lawyer
-felix fursona with glasses and suits (kyle says bon is just like felix)
-sha js rose’s fursona. rosemary is a furry.
-4,5,6
-linda only talked to susan cus they were good friends but not rosemary. linda would've told susan she was leaving.
-felix scene on the river was hardest to animate cus it was in a lighter place, but with felix its lit up middle of day
-potential actual showstopper show ?? 11 minute episodes
-rosemarys favorite character was sha. but billy if not sha, rosemary loves clowns
-ed molly fun fact: they liked playing pong. martin thinks ed would be mischievous and do pranks, between sophie ed and molly he'd be the most rebellious. molly would be more like “ed you cant blow up the school that's not right”
-molly was very behaved. best behaved walten child.
-rosemarys sister laura in season 2. rosemary doesn't like her family and doesn't really speak to her mom or sister much.
-jacks favorite drink is ramasote or wine, rosemary likes champagne, sophie likes mojito “i think drink does not just mean alcohol”
-mollys is pepsi. eds is liquid mercury. jacks favorite drink black coffee or rumcoke. jack would have a gallon of rootbeer.
19 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Finally watched the Beastly movie & it was terrible but Kyle had such pure Dumbass energy that I was inspired to draw this (book characters, tho)
13 notes · View notes
sparkles-and-trash · 4 years
Text
My fav 3 versions/interpretations of South Park characters thing!
I’m so sorry this took much longer than anticipated, I was gonna do it Friday but then I had a panic attack for the first time in forever because my CFS have been real bad lately and I was in such bad shape my BFF had to come and smack me back to life, and Sunday was suddenly full on breakdown day, a bad BPD episode and yeah, it was rough, but today I’m doing better and I realize nobody really cares about my personal issues lol but I just have a need to excuse myself here and I realize that’s kinda dumb but here we are ANYWAYS I hope these are okay, and that these are in no way the RIGHT interpretations, just my personal favorites! 
Kyle:
suggested by the wonderful  @otherluces <3
#1 
I’m not gonna lie, I love nerdy, preppy Kyle. Sweater-vests, collard shirts, doesn’t realize how attractive he is Kyle, oblivious to people having crushes on him Kyle, set on Harvard to become a lawyer and fight for justice and argue for a living, yanno? 
#2 
I also really like the more dorky and nerdy Kyle, where he has really niché interests that he gets totally invested in and talks about 24/7, loves reading and studying, but not just to get good results, but because he genuinly enjoys it.
#3
The last version I can think of with him, is the tall, lanky and kinda hard to read Kyle. He keeps a lot of his feelings to himself, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have them. He plays basketball, he’s good at it too, and while he does well in school and everyone expects him to go into law, he has some totally different dream he keeps to himself for now. He kinda perks up a bit when in smaller crowds, esp with his cloest friends, but he still carries a lot of secrets that some time needs to come out.
Tweek:
suggested by my new fren  @soft-craig-and-tweek ^^
I like Tweek in so many ways these were hard to pick, but I’mma try to narrow it down a bit and not go totally off haha
#1
I actually quite enjoy the jagged, tired Tweek, the one who with help from friends and family manage to get off the meth his parents feed him secretly, but who still struggle with withdrawal, dark bags under his eyes, kinda pale and with sharp features, but he’s still a sweet and kind boy, a boy who wants to make the right choices and change the world to a better place, but who still has a darkness he carries, and the fact that he never gives up that fight is what makes him so special 
#2
and okay I have to be honest, I do love myself some sunshine boy Tweek. This Tweek still has issues, he is maybe even more anxious than the last one, but he’s also just as vibrant and energetic as he is anxious! He is an artist, he paints with bright colors, he composes beautiful, hopeful melodies, he feels everything so much,  and he is a contagious and exciting person to be around. Cannot dress for the life of him. So much mis-match and odd outfits, but it kinda works? 
#3
The last one I’m gonna mention for this wonderful boy, is the more alternative Tweek. He writes obscure poetry, he watches too many conspiracy theory videos on youtube, he draws the monsters in his mind, and he writes the scariest, most hauntingly beautiful stories on the internet, and people online love him. He has no idea how to deal with being popular in that sense, because irl he is the type to not belong to a certain friend group, but he does go along well with most people on a surface level. Dark circles, shaky hands, crooked and cute smiles, baggy t-shirts and ripped jeans. When he first opens up to someone, he really, really does, and he will always support and be there for you. If you deserve it, that is. 
Nichole: 
also suggested by  @soft-craig-and-tweek <3 
#1
I love nerdy Nichole who isn’t afraid to show it! Maybe she’s a streamer or youtube gamer even, I can def see her writing fanfiction, and being hella good at it too! Makes quite a name for herself online, and hangs out with the boys a lot irl, has game nights with the boys from Board Girls (even Cartman sometimes), is funny in a sarcastic way, but never mean. 
#2
Popular girl Nichole is also a favorite for me, but not in the “classical” sense. I imagine her to be a sporty, maybe on both the basket and volleyball team, captain for the basket one, she’s a born leader, she’s kind and fair, but can also be strict, and people always trust her to be honest and true.  
#3
Artsy Nichole!! I imagine her in bright yellow dresses and with her hair flowing and free, with flowers in her hair, freckles on her face, a big, genuine smile, a loud laughter that is so contagious, she loves spending time with Jimmy because they have a very similar humor, and she’s a theater kid, she sings like an angel and can act, oh boy can she act, she can make anyone laugh or cry in just a blink of an eye, she’s just a human sun-ray and I love her a lot 
Butters: 
suggested by @kinguidamundo, thank you so much!! 
#1
I love edgy Butters soooo much??? Like, he’s still a kind and bright boy, but he can also stand up for himself a lot more, he likes fashion a lot, he gets tattoos and piercings, he explores tons of ways to express himself, he’s a yes-dude, he goes out on dates a lot, but isn’t ready for a “real” relationship yet, but he enjoys meeting people and testing out himself around different types of people! Also he is a bi icon change my mind jk u can’t 
#2
I have a weak spot for the kind of soft and timid looking Butters too, who wears pastel colors and have big, innocent eyes, he is genuine and kind, but he carries something darker inside, something he isn’t sure how to deal with, something that scares him, but in reality it’s just normal feelings, anger, resentment and fear, but he’s lived his life ignoring them so much they catch him off guard at times. He learns to live with them slowly, and he does so with lots of help and patience from friends and loved ones. 
#3
Okay, last one, totally self-indulging here, but yeah, happy sunflower boy is also a big favorite. He is more confident than the previous version, but in a gullible way if that makes any sense? He believes the best in people, and if he is proven wrong, he’s willing to try to help them become better people, if they want to or not! This is honestly the version I love most with Stan, Butters being the ray of sunshine in Stan’s life and Stan being the realism to keep Butters grounded and them both supporting each other so much? Fuck yeah that’s the good stuff. 
Clyde:
suggested by @horrorpumpkin, ty sm friend! <3 
#1
Himbo Clyde!!! Jock dude who genuinely loves sports, he’s a team player, and while he might not be super intellectual, he is very socially smart, he is kind and empathic, he is funny and likable, he always tries his best to make everyone feel included, and while he loves chicks a lot, and is a sexual dude, he does it with nothing but respect and admiration for the ladies! 
#2
Bisexual disaster Clydeeee <3 obv being bi isn’t a personality trait, but he is very open about it, he wants to be confident and good at flirting, but goddamn is he a MESS! He’s also a huge supporter of every single relationship his friends is in, he loves love, in all shapes and forms, he is emotional and kind and awkward in an endearing way. 
#3
Can’t leave out crybaby Clyde, can we now? He’s a bit of an awkward bean as well, but he owns it a bit more. He is kinda like a puppy, a cute, excitable and emotional puppy who loves his friends, video games and lazy movie nights, kinda chubby, he loves baking and does it a lot with Tweek, he is also a huge nerd for Harry Potter and totally geek out over it with Kyle and Nichole sdhlksgdhl
Kenny: 
suggested by anon! 
#1
First up I guess I should put my high school AU Kenny. I know it’s controversial, but I imagine this Kenny to be more on the quiet side, but not really in a shy way. He’s just a bit of an observer who doesn’t speak unless he really sees fit, and while he still has his crude humor and is kinda rumored to be sleeping around a lot, he actually struggle with intimacy issues. He never imagined them to include sexual stuff, but turns out they do, and balancing being sexually open and curious and having these issues ain’t easy on the boy, let me tell you that. 
#2
This one is kinda heavily inspired by Luces, but I love him as kind and loyal, but also a bit more chatty and charming, but not for his own gain. He wants others to feel good about themselves, in social settings, his friends, during sexy times, he is selfless and good, but he is also living for the moment, he is a likable and wonderful guy, but he does still only REALLY open up emotionally to people he really trusts. Not traditionally attractive, but interesting looking in a way. Lots of freckles, bit of buck teeth with a big gap between his front teeth, messy kinda curly hair, long straight nose. Always wears baggy hoodies and worn out jeans, shrugs and gives that lopsided smile when people ask him about anything personal.
#3
Mysterious Kennyyyy. You think you know him, everyone does, but in reality, very few have seen the real him. He likes people, and he likes to help them, he’s always down to listen to people’s problems and help them, he wants to inspire kids like himself to never give up and think there’s only one path for them, because he knows there is not. Volunteers at the animal shelter with Stan, works part time at Tweek Bro’s and is good buddies with Tweek. Had a early sexual debut, slept around a bit and got his heart broken unexpectedly when he was a Freshman, so there are some walls there now, but he ain’t usually one to turn down someone who’s up for it and whom with he has good chemistry either. 
171 notes · View notes
geist-fledermaus · 3 years
Text
Get To Know Me!
Since I’ve received quite a few followers here and there, I might as well do this!
What is your full name?: Beryl (Sorry, I don’t like my whole name)
What does your name mean?: It’s a gemstone. 
Are you named after anyone?: My großmütter, Beryl Rae Jensen
Does your name make any interesting anagrams?: Not really?
If you had to change your first name, what would you change it to?: Fuck if I know. Probably something basic so I’m less easy to find. 
Where are you from?: North Pole, AK (I shit you not)
Where were you born?: North Pole, AK
Where did you grow up?: North Pole, AK
Who did you look up to growing up?: My father.
What are your best characteristics?: I can draw. 
What are your favorite things about yourself?: I can draw. 
Which of your parents are you closest to?: My dad.
Which of your parents are you more like?: My daaaad.
What relative was important to you growing up & why?: Tbh My dad was my super hero, he took care of me and my sister, worked 3 jobs, and took care of mom while she went through cancer. He’s the most important lmfao.
What is one thing that you’ve never revealed to your parents?: I’m Pagan.
What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender?: Bert Raymond... 
What is your best physical feature?: Eyes or chest. :/ 
What is your biggest accomplishment?: Being locally recognized as an artist, especially on local TV. 
What is your biggest fear?: Being forgotten, being alone. 
What is your biggest regret?: Not pushing myself even more with art. 
What is your eye color?: Various blues with inner green circles. 
What inspires you?: Other artists. 
What is the most important thing in your life?: My fiance! @boywasgirl
What has required the most courage of you in your life so far?: To not give up. To not quit college and drop everything I’ve worked hard for. 
What is your favorite flower?: Sunflowers!
What is your favorite weather?: Rainy weather and thunder/lightning storms!
Who is your favorite actor?: I have a few, but I love Johnny Depp and Jason Momoa. 
Who is your favorite actress?: F u c k. I adore Emma Stone, Emma Watson.. uhh.. Emilia Clarke! That’s just to name a few. 
Who is your favorite celebrity?: Oh fuck. Idk. 
Who is your favorite musician?: They’re a band but I love Bring Me The Horizon, Oliver Syke’s voice and lyrics hit me hard. 
Who’s your favorite person in the world?: @boywasgirl
Who are your best friends?: @armageddonne @darkdragoonxiii @vixenchildxd69-blog and my bff Alisha! 
What is your favorite childhood memory?: My sister breaking the fucking garage door like a dumbshit. 
What is your favorite color?: Black or seafoam green~ I also love other greens and blues! It’s so damn hard to choose. 
What is your favorite cultural activity?: Uh. Axe throwing? Idk what counts as a cultural activity when it comes to me and my family haha. 
What is your favorite drink?: For waking up, Monster or pomegranate and orange redbull kickers, I love mountain dew, anything with peaches and mango as well. 
What is your favorite fairytale?: HAHA. I looove reading about the Tales of Grimm. I can’t just pick one. 
What is your favorite food?: Pizza or Taco Bell.
What is your favorite holiday destination?: Anywhere but Alaska. I love to explore. I REALLY want to travel to Germany, Norway, Ireland, England, and most of Western Europe. 
What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?: Strawberry Cheesecake or Mint Chocolate
What is your favorite music genre?: Fuck. I have so many. I love a lot of metal subgenres, alternative rock, punk, old 2000′s emo bands, EDM, rap, I don’t even know how to label all of my favorites but there’s a lot to unpack there. If you’re curious just shoot me a question ahaha! 
What is your favorite physical activity?: Swimming!! 
What is your favorite quote?: “Keep listening to music because it gets you through everything, I promise.” - Mitch Lucker, former vocalist of Suicide Silence. 
What is your favorite snack?: Peach Rings, Brightside Skittles.. Uhh. MY MOM’S CLAM DIP AND RUFFLES CHIPS? 
What is your favorite song?: Throne - BMTH or Mis//Understanding - We Came As Romans.
What is your favorite sport?: Swimming, Hockey, Volleyball and Fencing. 
What is your favorite time of the day?: Early afternoons or late nights. 
What is your favorite type of clothing?: Goth/Alt fashion. 
What is your favorite way to pass time?: Gaming or drawing. 
What is the name of your favorite restaurant?: Family Diner (It’s in my town. It’s really chill and laid back.)
What is your all-time favorite town or city? Why?: I really enjoyed Denver, CO. It was filled with really colorful, intriguing personalities. There was so much to explore, everyone was so open and sweet. 
What is your height?: ... 5′2″
What time period would you love to live in?: Viking Era. 
What did you do for fun as a child?: Drawing. 
Who was a role model in your life?: My dad! 
Did you have any childhood pets?: I grew up with 5 cats and 4 dogs! 
When you were young, what did you want to be?: A mortician. 
What family traditions were important to you?: I can’t even remember many.. I loved during gatherings how we’d play Spoons, wrestle, and be reckless though. 
What was your favorite childhood memory?: Ahah! Shenanigans with my “Twin” Kyle. 
What was your favorite childhood possession?: My Gameboy Color! 
What challenges did you experience when you were young?: Almost losing my mother, trying to speak English, being bullied heavily. 
What is a defining moment from your childhood?: My mother coming home from the hospital finally. 
What do you do for fun?: Play video games and draw. I’m pretty boring. 
What are your hobbies?: Drawing, Painting, Digital Art, Gaming, Dancing, Singing.
What is something that you’re really passionate about?: My art.
What is something you could spend hours doing?: Drawing
What is something you wish you did more often?: Draw. 
If you had to watch a documentary, what would you want it to be about?: Anything WW1/WW2 related or Forensics/Serial Killer related. 
What do you always have on in the background?: Lofi Hiphop or random videos on youtube that catch my eye. 
How do you feel about travel?: Fuck yeah, where are we going and for how long? 
What is a guilty pleasure you enjoy?: Fuckin’ watching Serial Killer documentaries. 
How have your interests changed over the years?: Nah, I’m still the same. I’m pretty bland. 
Which sibling are you closest to?: My sister, Erika! 
How close are you with your parents?: Close but not too close.
How has your relationship with your parents changed over the years?: For the worse.
What is one of the most important lessons that you learned from your family?: You cannot trust anyone. Not even your own family. 
When does your family cause you to stress?: All the damn time. All they need to do is send me a text and I immediately begin to dread. 
What does the word family mean to you?: Something that I never got to fully have but I experienced. It’s also something I can create on my own accord. 
When you envision your ideal family, what do you see?: Honestly me with my partner/partners, kids, animals, and friends. 
How vulnerable is your family with each other?: Everyone is always on guard and they’ll be mean if you even show some form of sensitivity. 
What is a family trait that isn’t necessarily the healthiest?: Being a snitch, gaslighting, gatekeeping, misogyny, yelling if you even show an inkling of emotion. I could go on. 
What relatives had the biggest impact on you growing up?: In a negative way, almost all of my family. The only two I really loved growing up were my dad and sister, Erika. 
What do you watch on television?: If it’s cable I go to MTV, Forensic Files, or Adult Swim/Anything with cartoons. 
What is one of your favorite movies?: To Hell And Back, Howl’s Moving Castle, Princess Mononoke, Dracula Untold (For some reason I just really like it, don’t judge). 
If you could have free tickets to any event, what would it be?: A BMTH concert PLEASE. Or anything that’s a EDM/Rave environment. ;_;
What is your favorite form of media?: Youtube tbh. 
What role does music play in your life?: A huge role, BMTH got me through a lot of hard times. 
What is one of your favorite books?: Corey Taylor’s Seven Deadly Sins. It’s a riot of a read and makes me laugh. 
How often do you watch sporting events?: Here and there, especially at bars if they have Hockey going. 
What would your ideal weekend getaway look like?: Road trip to Anchorage and staying at my mom’s cousin’s estate in the mountains. I only got to go there a few times and the view is absolutely captivating. You can see the waters, the city, all the lights.. fuck I’d love to draw that. 
Who are popular figures that you love to learn from?: Fuck if I know LOL. 
What celebrity/musician would you love to meet in real life?: Oliver Sykes and Maria Brink tbh.
If you wrote a memoir about your life, what would it be called?: “Well, That Happened.” A memoir of a dumb bitch LOL. 
What fictional world would you want to travel to for a day?: FUCK. I’d love to just be in a simulation like the girl in Porter Robinson’s music video of Shelter. Just being in a drawing simulation where I can run around and create anything and everything around me. But if we’re talking actual worlds.. I’d probably love to be in Avatar The Last Airbender’s world. I love that series so much. 
What room in your house most represents who you are as a person?: The Office. It’s got art supplies, our gaming PC, all of my schoolwork/homework, the drawing tablets.. 
How clean a person are you?: Tbh I am pretty clean, it’s just cleaning huge messes/unpacking that I hate. 
What is a pet peeve that you have?: STOP CHEWING WITH YOUR FUCKING MOUTH OPEN. 
What behavior do you do that is most likely a pet peeve to others?: Uhh. Idk. Nail biting? Loud laughter? forgetting to turn off lights? Idk. 
What phrase or word do you overuse when you talk?: “I’m so sorry” “I m a g i n e” 
If you could only eat at one restaurant for the rest of your life, what would it be?: Fuck. Hahaaaaa. I’d probably love to just sit and eat at the Family Diner. I love their Reubens. 
What is something about your personality that you like? Don’t like?: I like that people feel comfortable running to me when they need a friend. I don’t like a lot about me, though.
What would your friends be surprised to learn about you?: I am ambidextrous and I know German/Englisch and some French! I want to learn Norwegian even more and Gaelic! 
Where do you see yourself in a few years?: West coast where it’s rainy with those that I love, pursuing my career finally after all these years of hard work. 
Thanks for reading this if you finally made it to the end! If there’s other questions you want to ask, don’t hesitate! ^^ Hopefully you learned something about me! 
3 notes · View notes
weekendwarriorblog · 3 years
Text
The Weekend Warrior 10/13/20: FREAKY, THE CLIMB, MANK, HILLBILLY ELEGY, AMMONITE, DREAMLAND, DOC-NYC and MUCH MORE!
It’s a pretty crazy week for new releases as I mentioned a few times over the past couple weeks, but it’s bound to happen as we get closer to the holiday movie season, which this year won’t include many movies in theaters, even though movie theaters are still open in many areas of the country… and closing in others. Sigh. Besides a few high-profile Netflix theatrical release, we also get movies starring Vince Vaughn, Margot Robbie, Kate Winslet, Saoirse Ronan, Mel Gibson and more offerings. In fact, I’ve somehow managed to write 12 (!!!!) reviews this week… yikes.
Tumblr media
Before we get to the new movies, let’s look at a few series/festivals starting this week, including the always great documentary festival, DOC-NYC, which runs from November 11 through 19. A few of the docs I’ve already seen are (probably not surprisingly, if you know me) some of the music docs in the “Sonic Cinema” section, including Oliver Murray’s Ronnie’s, a film about legendary jazz musician and tenor sax player Ronnie Scott, whose London club Ronnie Scott’s Jazz Club has been one of the central cores for British jazz fans for many decades.
Alex Winter’s Zappa is a much more satisfying portrait of the avant-garde rocker than the doc Frank Zappa: In His Own Words from a few years back, but I was even more surprised by how much I enjoyed Julien Temple’s Crock of Gold: A Few Rounds with Shane MacGowan, because I’ve never really been a Pogues fan, but it’s highly entertaining as we learn about the chronically-soused frontman of the popular Irish band.
I haven’t seen Robert Yapkowitz and Richard Peete’s in My Own Time: A Portrait of Karen Dalton, a portrait of the blues and folk singer, yet, nor have I watched Marcia Jarmel and Ken Schneider’s Los Hermanos/The Brothers about two brother musicians separated from childhood after leaving their native Cuba, but I’ll try to get to both of them soon enough.
Outside of the realm of music docs is Ilinca Calugareanu’s A Cops and Robbers Story, which follows Corey Pegues from being a drug dealer and gang member to a celebrated deputy inspector within the NYPD. There’s also Nancy (The Loving Story) Buirski’s A Crime on the Bayou, the third part of the filmmaker’s trilogy about brave individuals in the Civil Rights era, this one about 19-year-old New Orleans fisherman Gary Duncan who tries to break up a fight between white and black teens at an integrated school and is arrested for assaulting a minor when merely touching a white boy’s arm.
Hao Wu’s 76 Days covers the length of Wuhan, China’s lockdown due to COVID-19, a very timely doc that will be released by MTV Documentary Films via virtual cinema on December 4. It’s one of DOC-NYC’s features on its annual Short List, which includes Boys State, Collective, The Fight, On the Record, and ten others that will vie for juried categories.
IFC Films’ Dear Santa, the new film from Dana Nachman, director of the wonderful Pick of the Litter, will follow its Heartland Film Festival debut with a run at COD-NYC before its own December 4 release. The latter is about the USPS’s “Operation Santa” program that receives hundreds of thousands of letters to Santa every year and employees thousands of volunteers to help make the wishes of these kids come true.
Basically, there’s a LOT of stuff to see at DOC-NYC, and while most of the movies haven’t been released publicly outside festivals yet, a lot of these movies will be part of the doc conversations of 2020. DOC-NYC gives the chance for people across the United States to see a lot of great docs months before anyone else, so take advantage of some of their ticket packs to save some money over the normal $12 per ticket price. The $199 price for an All Access Film Pass also isn’t a bad deal if you have enough time to watch the hundreds of DOC-NYC offerings. (Sadly, I never do, yet I’m still a little bummed to miss the 10Am press screenings at IFC Center that keeps me off the streets… or in this case, sitting on my ass at home.)
Not to be outdone by the presence of DOC-NYC, Film at Lincoln Center is kicking off its OWN seventh annual “Art of the Real” doc series, which has a bit of overlap by running from November 13 to 26. I really don’t know a lot about the documentaries being shown as part of this program, presented with Mubi and The New York Times, but check this out. For just 50 bucks, you can get an all-access pass to all 17 films, which you can casually watch at home over the two weeks of the fest.
Tumblr media
Okay, let’s get to some theatrical releases, and the one I’ve been anticipating the most (also the one getting the widest release) is Christopher Landon’s FREAKY from Blumhouse and Universal Pictures. It stars Kathryn Newton as Millie Kessler, a high school outcast who is constantly picked on, but one night, she ends up encountering the serial killer known as the “Blissfield Butcher” (Vince Vaughn), but instead of dying when she’s stabbed with a ritual blade. The next morning Millie and the Butcher wake up to discover that they’ve been transported into the body of the other. Oh, it’s Friday the 13th… oh, now I get it… Freaky Friday!
Landon is best known for writing many of the Paranormal Activity sequels and directing Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones. Msore importantly, he directed Happy Death Day and its sequel Happy Death Day 2 U, two of my favorite Blumhouse movies, because they so successfully mix horror with comedy, which is so hard to do. That’s what Freaky is all about, too, and it’s even harder this time even though Freaky has way more gruesome and gory kills than anything in Landon’s other films. Heck, many of the kills are gorier than the most recent Halloween from Blumhouse, and it’s a little shocking when you’re laughing so hard at times.
Landon does some clever things with what’s essentially a one-joke premise of a killer in a teen girl’s body and vice versa, but like the Lindsay Lohan-Jamie Lee Curtis remake from 2003, it’s all about the talent of the two main actors to pull off the rather intricate nature of playing humor without losing the seriousness of the horror element.
It may not be too surprising with Vaughn, who made a ton of dramas and thrillers before turning to comedy. (Does everyone remember that he played Norman Bates in Gus Van Sant’s remake of Psycho and also starred in thrillers The Cell and Domestic Disturbance?) Newton is a bit more of an unknown quantity, but as soon as Tillie dawns the red leather jacket, you know that she can use her newly found homicidal attitude to get some revenge on those who have been terrible to her.
In some ways, the comedy aspects of Freaky win out over the horror but no horror fan will be disappointed by the amount of gory kills and how well the laughs emerge from a decent horror flick. Freaky seems like the kind of movie that Wes Craven would have loved.
Tumblr media
I’m delighted to say that this week’s “Featured Flick” is Michael Angelo Covino and Kyle Marvin’s indie comedy THE CLIMB (Sony Pictures Classics), a movie that I have seen no less than three times this year, first when it was playing Sundance, a few months later when it was supposed to open in March… and then again last week! And you know what? I enjoyed it just as much every single time. It’s an amazing two-hander that stars Covino and Marvin as best friends Mike and Kyle, who have a falling out over the former sleeping with the latter’s fiancé, and it just gets funnier and funnier as the friends fight and Kyle gets engaged to Marisa (Gayle Rankin from GLOW) who hates Mike. Can this friendship possibly survive?
I really had no idea what to expect the first time I saw The Climb at the Sony Screening Room, but it was obviously going to be a very different movie for Sony Pictures Classics, who had started out the year with so many great films before theaters shut down. (Unfortunately, they may have waited too long on this one as theaters seem to be shutting down again even while NYC and L.A. have yet to reopen them. Still, I think this would be just as much fun in a drive-in.)
The movie starts with a long, extended scene of the two leads riding bikes on a steep mountain in France, talking to each other as Kyle (once the athlete of the duo) has fallen out of shape. During the conversation, Mike admits to having slept with Kyle’s fiancé Ava (Judith Godréche) and things turn hostile between the two. We then get the first big jump in time as we’re now at the funeral for Ava, who actually had been married to Mike. Kyle eventually moves on and begins a relationship with his high school sweetheart Marisa, who we meet at the Thanksgiving gathering for Kyle’s extended family. In both these cases, we see how the relationship between Mike and Kyle has changed/evolved as Mike has now fallen on hard times.
It's a little hard to explain why what’s essentially a “slice of life” movie can be so funny. On one hand, The Climb might be the type of movie we might see from Mike Leigh, but Covino and Marvin find a way to make everything funny and also quite eccentric in terms of how some of the segments begin and end.  Technically, it’s also an impressive feat with the number of amazing single shot sequences and how smooth some of the transitions work. It’s actually interesting to see when and how the filmmakers decide to return to the lives of their subjects – think of it a bit like Michael Apted’s “Up” series of docs but covering a lot shorter span in time.
Most importantly, The Climb has such a unique tone and feel to other indie dramedies we’ve seen, as the duo seem to be influenced more by European cinema than American indies. Personally, I think a better title for The Climb might have been “Frenemied,” but even with the movie’s fairly innocuous title, you will not forget the experience watching this entertaining film anytime soon.
Tumblr media
Maybe this should be called “Netflix week,” because the streamer is releasing a number of high-profile movies into theaters and on the streaming service. Definitely one of the more anticipated movies of the year is David Fincher’s MANK, which will get a theatrical release this week and then stream on Netflix starting December 4.
It stars Gary Oldman as Herman Mankiewicz, the Hollywood screenwriter who has allowed himself to succumb to alcoholism but has been hired by Orson Welles (Tom Burke) to write his next movie, Citizen Kane, working with a personal secretary Rita Alexander (played by Lily Collins). His story is told through his interactions with media mogul William Hearst (Charles Dance) and relationship with actress and Hearst ingenue and mistress, Marion Davies (Amanda Seyfried).
It I were asked to pick one director who is my absolute favorite, Fincher would probably be in my top 5 because he’s had such an illustrious and varied career of movie styles, and Mank continues that tradition as Fincher pays tribute to old Hollywood and specifically the work of Orson Welles in every frame of this biopic that’s actually more about the troubled writer of Citizen Kane who was able to absorb everything happening in his own Hollywood circles and apply them to the script.
More than anything, Mank feels like a movie for people who love old Hollywood and inside Hollywood stories, and maybe even those who may already know about the making of Welles’ highly-regarded film might find a few new things to appreciate. I particularly enjoyed Mankiewicz’s relationships with the women around him, including his wife “Poor Sarah,” played by Tuppence Middleton, Collins’ Rita, and of course, Seyfried’s absolutely radiant performance as Davies.  Maybe I would have appreciated the line-up of known names and characters like studio head Louis B Mayer and others, if more of them had any sort of effect on the story and weren’t just
The film perfectly captures the dynamic of the time and place as Mank is frequently the only honest voice in a sea of brown nosers and yes-men. Maybe I would have enjoyed Oldman’s performance more if everything that comes out of Mankiewicz’s mouth wasn’t an all-too-clever quip.
The film really hits a high point after a friend of Mank’s commits suicide and how that adds to the writer’s woes about not being able to save him. The film’s last act involves Mank dealing with the repercussions after the word gets out that Citizen Kane is indeed about Hearst.
Overall, Mank is a movie that’s hard to really dig into, and like some of Fincher’s previous work, it tends to be devoid of emotion. Even Fincher’s decision to be clever by including cigarette burns to represent Mank’s “reels” – something explained by Brad Pitt in Fight Club – just drives home the point that Mank is deliberately Fincher’s most meta movie to date.
You can also read my technical/crafts review of Mank over at Below the Line.
Tumblr media
Ron Howard’s adaptation of JD Vance’s bestselling memoir HILLBILLY ELEGY will be released by Netflix into theaters ahead of its streaming debut on November 24. It stars Amy Adams and Glenn Close, but in honesty, it’s about JD Vance, you know, the guy who wrote the memoir.  The film follows his younger years (as played by Owen Asztalos) while dealing with a dysfunctional white trash family in Middletown, Ohio, dealing with his headstrong Mamaw (Close) and abusive mother dealing with drug addiction (Adams).  Later in life, while studying at Yale (and played by Gabriel Basso), he has to return to his Ohio roots to deal with his mother’s growing addiction that forces him to come to terms with his past.
I’m a bit of a Ron Howard stan – some might even say “an apologist” – and there’s no denying that Hillbilly Elegy puts him the closest to A Beautiful Mind territory than he’s been in quite some time. That doesn’t mean that this movie is perfect, nor that I would consider it one of his better movies, though. I went into the movie not knowing a thing about JD Vance or his memoir but after the first reviews came out, I was a little shocked how many of them immediately went political, because there’s absolutely nothing resembling politics in the film.
It is essentially an adaptation of a memoir, dealing with JD Vance’s childhood but then also the past that led his mother and grandmother down the paths that made his family so dysfunctional. I particularly enjoyed the relationship between the older Vance and his future wife Usha (as played by Freida Pinto) earlier in their relationship as they’re both going to Yale and Vance is trying to move past his family history to succeed in the realm of law.
It might be a no-brainer why Adams and Close are being given so much of the attention for their performances. They are two of the best. Close is particularly amusing as the cantankerous Mamaw, who veers between cussing and crying, but also has some great scenes both with Adams and the younger Vance. The amazing special make-up FX used to change her appearance often makes you forget you’re watching Close. I wish I could say the same for Adams, who gives such an overwrought and over-the-top performance that it’s very hard to feel much emotionally for her character as she goes down a seemingly endless vortex of drug addiction. It’s a performance that leads to some absolute craziness. (It’s also odd seeing Adams in basically the Christian Bale role in The Fighter, although Basso should get more credit about what he brings out in their scenes together.)
Hillbilly Elegy does have a number of duller moments, and I’m not quite sure anyone not already a fan of Vance’s book would really have much interest in these characters. I certainly have had issues with movies about people some may consider “Southern White Trash,” but it’s something I’ve worked on myself to overcome. It’s actually quite respectable for a movie to try to show characters outside the normal circles of those who tend to write reviews, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the movie might be able to connect with people in rural areas that rarely get to see themselves on screen.
Hillbilly Elegy has its issues, but it feels like a successful adaptation of a novel that may have been difficult to keep an audience invested in with all its flashbacks and jumps in time.
Tumblr media
Netflix is also streaming the Italian drama THE LIFE AHEAD, directed by Edoardo Ponti, starring Oscar-winning actress Sophia Loren, who happens to also be the filmmaker’s mother. She plays Madame Rosa, a Holocaust survivor in Italy who takes a stubborn young street kid named Momo (Ibrahima Gueye), much to both their chagrin.
I’ll be shocked if Italy doesn’t submit Ponti’s film as their choice for the Oscar’s International Film category, because it has all of the elements that would appeal to Oscar voters. In that sense, I also found it to be quite traditional and formulaic.  Loren is quite amazing, as to be expected, and I was just as impressed with young Ibrahima Gueye who seems to be able to hold his own in what’s apparently his first movie. There’s others in the cast that also add to the experience including a trans hooker named Lola, but it’s really the relationship between the two main characters that keeps you invested in the movie. I only wish I didn’t spend much of the movie feeling like I knew exactly where it’s going in terms of Rosa doing something to save the young boy and giving him a chance at a good life.
I hate to be cynical, but at times, this is so by the books, as if Ponti watched every Oscar movie and made one that had all the right elements to appeal to Oscar voters and wokesters alike. That aside, it does such a good job tugging at heartstrings that you might forgive how obviously formulaic it is.
Netflix is also premiering the fourth season of The Crown this week, starring Olivia Colman as Queen Elizabeth and bringing on board Gillian Anderson as Margaret Thatcher, Emma Corin, Helena Bonham Carter, Tobis Menzies, Marion Bailey and Charles Dancer. Quite a week for the streamer, indeed.
Tumblr media
Another movie that may be in the conversation for Awards season is AMMONITE (NEON), the new film from Francis Lee (God’s Own Country), a drama set in 1840s England where Kate Winslet plays Mary Anning, a fossil hunter,  tasked to look after melancholic young bride, Charlotte Murcheson (Saoirse Ronan), sent to the sea to get better only for them to get into a far more intimate relationship.
I had been looking forward to this film, having heard almost unanimous raves from out of Toronto a few months back. Maybe my expectations were too high, because while this is a well-made film with two strong actors, it’s also rather dreary and not something I necessarily would watch for pleasure. The comparisons to last year’s Portrait of a Lady on Fire (also released by NEON) are so spot-on that it’s almost impossible to watch this movie without knowing exactly where it’s going from the very minute that the two main characters meet.
Winslet isn’t bad in another glammed-down role where she can be particularly cantankerous, but knowing that the film would eventually take a sapphic turn made it somewhat predictable. Ronan seems to be playing her first outright adult role ever, and it’s a little strange to see her all grown-up after playing a teenager in so many movies.
The movie is just so contained to the one setting right up until the last 20 minutes when it actually lives the Lyme setting and lets us see the world outside Mary’s secluded lifestyle.  As much as I wanted to love Ammonite, it just comes off as so obvious and predictable – and certainly not helped by coming out so soon after Portrait of a Lady. There’s also something about Ammonite that just feels so drab and dreary and not something I’d necessarily need to sit through a second time.
Tumblr media
The animated film WOLFWALKERS (GKIds) is the latest from Tomm Moore and Ross Stewart, directors of the Oscar-nominated Secret of the Kells (Moore’s Song of the Sea also received an Oscar nomination a few years later.) It’s about a young Irish girl named Robyn (voiced Honor Kneafsey) who is learning to be hunter from her father (voiced by Sean Bean) to help him wipe out the last wolf pack. Roby then meets another girl (voiced by Eva Whittaker) who is part of a tribe rumored to transform into wolves by night.
I have to be honest that by the time I got around to start watching this, I was really burnt out and not in any mood to watch what I considered to look like a kiddie movie. It looks nice, but I’m sure I’d be able to enjoy it more in a different head (like watching first thing on a Saturday morning).
Regardless, Wolfwalkers will be in theaters nationwide this Friday and over the weekend via Fathom Events as well as get full theatrical runs at drive-ins sponsored by the Landmark, Angelika and L.A.’s Vineland before it debuts on Apple TV+ on December 11. Maybe I’ll write a proper review for that column. You can get tickets for the Fathom Events at  WolfwalkersMovie.com.
Tumblr media
Next up is Miles Joris-Peyrafitte’s DREAMLAND (Paramount), starring Margot Robbie as Allison Wells, a bank-robbing criminal on the loose who encounters young man named Eugene Evans (Finn Cole) in rural Dust Bowl era North Dakota and convinces him to hide her and help her escape the authorities by taking her to Mexico.
Another movie where I wasn’t expecting much, more due to the generic title and genre than anything else, but it’s a pretty basic story of a young man in a small town who dreams of leaving and also glamorizes the crime stories he read in pulps. Because of the Great Depression in the late ’20, the crime wave was spreading out across the land and affecting everyone, even in more remote locations like the one at the center of Dreamland.
The sad truth is that there have been so many better movies about this era, including Warren Beatty’s Bonnie and Clyde, Lawless and many others. Because of that, this might not be bad but it’s definitely trying to follow movies that leave quite a long shadow. The innocent relationship between Eugene and Allison does add another level to the typical gangster story, but maybe that isn’t enough for Dreamland to really get past the fact that the romantic part of their relationship isn’t particularly believable.
As much as this might have been fine as a two-hander, you two have Travis Fimmel as Eugene’s stepfather and another generic white guy in Garrett Hedlund playing Allison’s Clyde Barrow-like partner in crime in the flashbacks. Cole has enough trouble keeping on pace with Robbie but then you have Fimmel, who was just grossly miscast. The film’s score ended up being so overpowering and annoying I wasn’t even remotely surprised when I saw that Joris-Peyrafitte is credited with co-writing the film’s score.
Dreamland is fine, though it really needed to have a stronger and more original vision to stand out. It’s another classic case of an actor being far better than the material she’s been given. This is being given a very limited theatrical release before being on digital next Tuesday.
Tumblr media
This might have been Netflix week, but maybe it could have been “Saban Films Week,” since the distributor also has three new movies. Actually, only two, because I screwed up, and I missed the fact that André Øvredal’s MORTAL was released by Saban Films LAST week. Not entirely my fault because for some reason, I had it opening this week, and I only realized that I was wrong last Wednesday. Oh, well.  It stars Nate Wolff as Eric Bergeland, an American in Norway who seems to have some enigmatic powers, but after killing a young lad, he ends up on the lam with federal agent Christine (Iben Akerlie from Victoria).
This is another movie I really wanted to like since I’ve been such a fan of Øvredal from back to his movie Trollhunter. Certainly the idea of him taking a dark look at superpowers through the lends of Norse mythology should be right up my alley. Even so, this darker and more serious take on superpowers – while it might be something relatively unique and new in movies – it’s something anyone who has read comics has seen many times before and often quite better.
Wolff’s character is deliberately kept a mystery about where he comes from, and all we know is that he survived a fire at his farm, and we watched him kill a young man that’s part of a group of young bullies.  From there, it kind of turns into a procedural as the authorities and Akerlie’s character tries to find out where Eric came from and got his powers. It’s not necessarily a slow or talkie movie, because there are some impressive set pieces for sure, but it definitely feels more like Autopsy of Jane Doe than Trollhunters. Maybe my biggest is that this is a relatively drab and lifeless performance by Wolff, who I’ve seen be better in other films.
Despite my issues, it doesn’t lessen my feelings about Øvredal as a filmmaker, because there’s good music and use of visual FX -- no surprise if you’ve seen Trollhunters -- but there’s still a really bad underlying feeling that you’re watching a lower budget version of an “X-Men” movie, and not necessarily one of the better ones.  Despite a decent (and kinda crazy) ending, Mortal never really pays off, and it’s such a slog to get to that ending that people might feel slightly underwhelmed.
Tumblr media
Seth Savoy’s ECHO BOOMERS (Saban Films) is a crime thriller based on a “true story if you believe in such things,” starring Patrick Schwarzenegger as Lance, a young art major, who falls in with a group of youths who break into rich people’s homes and trash them, also stealing some of the more valuable items for their leader Mel (Michael Shannon).
There’s a lot about Echo Boomers that’s going to feel familiar if you’ve seen Sofia Coppola’s The Bling Ring or the heist movie American Animals from a few years back, but even with those similarities, Seth Savoy has a strong cast and vision to make more out of the fairly weak writing than another director might manage. Schwarzenegger, who seems to be pulling in quite a wide range of roles for basically being another generic white actor is only part of a decent ensemble that includes Alex Pettyfer as the group’s ersatz alpha male Ellis and Hayley Law (also great in the recent Spontaneous) as his girlfriend Allie, the only girl taking part in the heists and destruction. Those three actors alone are great, but then you add Shannon just doing typically fantastic work as more of a catalyst than an antagonist.
You can probably expect there will be some dissension in the ranks, especially when the group’s “Fagan” Mel puts Lance in charge of keeping them in line and Allie forms a friendship with Lance. What holds the movie back is the decision to use a very traditional testimonial storytelling style where Lance and Allie narrate the story by relaying what happened to the authorities after their capture obviously. This doesn’t help take away from the general predictability of where the story goes either, because we’ve seen this type of thing going all the way back to The Usual Suspects.
While Echo Boomers might be fairly derivative of far better movies at times, it also has a strong directorial vision and a compelling story that makes up enough for that fact.
Tumblr media
In theaters this Friday and then On Demand and Digital on November 24 is Eshom and Ian Nelms’ action-comedy FATMAN (Saban Films/Paramount), starring Mel Gibson as Santa Claus and Walton Goggins as the hired assassin sent to kill him by a spoiled rich boy named  Billy (Chance Hurstfield) who unhappy with the presents he’s being brought for Christmas.
While we seem to be surrounded by high concept movies of all shapes and sizes, you can’t get much more high concept than having Mel Gibson playing a tough and cantankerous* Kris Kringle (*Is this the week’s actual theme?) who is struggling to survive with Mrs. Klaus (played by the wonderful Marianne Jean-Baptiste from In Fabric) when they’re given the opportunity to produce military grade items for the army using his speedy elf workshop. Unbeknownst to the Kringles, the disgruntled hitman who also feels he’s been let down by Santa is on his way to the North Pole to fulfill his assignment.
You’ll probably know whether you’ll like this movie or not since its snarkier comedic tone is introduced almost from the very beginning. This is actually a pretty decent role for Gibson that really plays up to his strengths, and it’s a shame that there wasn’t more to it than just a fairly obvious action movie that leads to a shoot-out. I probably should have enjoyed Goggins more in a full-on villainous role but having been watching a lot of him on CBS’ The Unicorn, it’s kind of hard to adjust to him playing this kind of role.  I did absolutely love Marianne Jean-Baptiste and the warmth she brought to a relatively snarky movie.
I’m not sure if Fatman is the best showing of Eshom and Ian Nelms’ abilities as filmmakers, because they certainly have some, but any chance of being entertaining is tamped down by a feeling the filmmakers are constantly trying to play it safe. Because of this, Fatman has a few fun moments but a generally weak premise that never fully delivers. It would have thrived by being much crazier, but instead, it’s just far too mild.
Tumblr media
Malin Åkerman stars in Paul Leyden’s CHICK FIGHT (Quiver Distribution) as Anna, a woman unhappy with her life and inability to survive on the little money she makes at her failing coffee shop. When Anna’s lesbian traffic cop friend Charleen (Dulcé Sloan) takes her to an underground fight club, Anna her trepidation about joining in, because she has never been in a fight in her life.  Learning that her mother has a legacy at the club, Anna agrees to be trained by Alec Baldwin’s always-drunk Murphy in order to take on the challenges of the likes of Bella Thorne’s Olivia.
Another movie where I’m not sure where to begin other than the fact that I’m not sure I’ve seen a movie trying so hard to be fun and funny and failing miserably at both. Listen, I generally love Akerman, and I’m always hoping for her to get stronger material to match her talents, but this tries its best to be edgy without ever really delivering on the most important thing for any comedy: Laughs.  Sure, the filmmakers try their best and even shoehorn a bit of romance for Anna in the form of the ring doctor played by Kevin Connolly from Entourage, but it does little to help distinguish the movie’s identity.
Listen, I’m not going to apologize for being a heterosexual male that finds Bella Thorne to be quite hot when she’s kicking ass in the ring. (I’m presuming that a lot of what we see in her scenes in the ring involves talented stuntwomen, but whoa! If that’s not the case.) Alec Baldwin seems to be in this movie merely as a favor to someone, possibly one of the producers, and when he disappears with no mention midway through the movie, you’re not particularly surprised. Another of trying too hard is having Anna’s father Ed (played by wrestler Kevin Nash) come out as gay and then use his every appearance to talk about his sex acts.  Others in the cast like Fortune Feimster seem to be there mainly for their bulk and believability as fighters.
Ultimately, Chick Fight is a fairly lame and bland girl power movie written, directed and mostly produced by men. I’m not sure why anyone might be expecting more from it than being a poorly-executed comedy lacking laughs.
Tumblr media
And yet, that wasn’t the worst movie of the weekend. That would be Andrzej Bartkowiak’s DEAD RECKONING (Shout! Studios). Yes, the Polish cinematographer and filmmaker who once made the amazing Romeo is Bleeding, starring Gary Oldman and Lena Olin, has returned with a movie with the onus of a premise that reads “a thriller inspired by the Boston Marathon bombing in 2013.” No, I did not make that up. It mostly takes place in Nantucket, Massachusetts, which I guess is sort of close to Boston, but instead it focuses on the relationship between teens Niko (K.J. Apa) and Tillie (India Eisley), the latter whose parents died in a plane crash that might have been caused by a terrorist. It just so happens that Niko’s brother Marco (Scott Adkins) is an Albanian terrorist. Coincidence? I think not!
Once you get past the most generic title ever, Dead Reckoning is just plain awful. I probably should have known what to expect when the movie opens with Eric “Never Turned Down a Job” Roberts, but also, I strong feel that Scott Adkins, better known for his martial arts skills, is easily one of the worst actors ever to be given lines to say in a movie. And yet, somehow, there are even worse actors in this movie. How is that even possible?
Although this presumed action movie opens with one of three or four fight sequences, we’re soon hanging out on the beach with a bunch of annoying teenagers, including Tillie, who is drowning the sorrow of recently losing her parents by literally drinking constantly in almost every single scene. When she meets the handsome Eastern European Niko, we think there’s some chance of Tillie being saved, but it isn’t meant to be.
Part of what’s so weird is that Dead Reckoning begins in territory familiar to fans of Barkowiak’s movies like Exit Wounds, Cradle 2 the Grave and Maximum Impact but then quickly shifts gears to a soppy teen romance. It’s weird enough to throw you off when at a certain point, it returns to the main plot, which involves Adkins’ terrorist plot and the search by FBI Agent Cantrell (played by James Remar) to find the culprit who killed Tillie’s parents. Oh, the FBI agent is also Tillie’s godfather. Of course, he is.
Beyond the fact that I spent much of the movie wondering what these teens in Nantucket have to do with the opening scene or the overall premise, this is a movie that anything that could be resembling talent or skill in Barkowiak’s filmmaking is long gone. Going past the horrendous writing – at one point, the exasperated and quite xenophobic Cantrell exclaims, “It’s been a nightmare since 9/11... who knows what's next?” -- or the inability of much of the cast to make it seem like anyone involved cares about making a good movie, the film is strangled by a score that wants to remind you it’s a thriller even as you watch people having fun on the beach on a sunny day.
Eventually, it does get back to the action with a fight between Cantrell and Marco… and then Marco gets into a fight with Tillie’s nice aunt nurse Jennifer where she has a surprisingly amount of fighting skills. There’s also Nico’s best friend who is either British or gay or both, but he spends every one of his scenes acting so pretentious and annoying, you kind of hope he’ll be blown up by terrorists. Sadly, you have to wait until the last act before the surfboards are pulled out.  (Incidentally, filmmakers, please don’t call a character in your movie “Marco,” especially if that character’s name is going to be yelled out repeatedly, because it will just lead to someone in the audience to yell out “Polo!” This is Uwe Boll School of Bad Filmmaking 101!)
The point is that the movie is just all over the place yet in a place that’s even remotely watchable. There even was a point when Tillie was watching the video of her parents dying in a car crash for the third or fourth time, and I just started laughing, since it’s such a slipshod scene.
It’s very likely that Dead Reckoning will claim the honor of being the worst movie I’ve seen this year. Really, the only way to have any fun watching this disaster is to play a drinking game where you take a drink every time Eisley’s character takes a drink. Or better yet, just bail on the movie and hit the bottle, because I’m sure whoever funded this piece of crap is.
Opening at New York’s Film Forum on Wednesday is Manfred Kirchheimer’s FREE TIME (Grasshopper/Cinema Conservancy), another wonderful doc from one of the kings of old school cinema verité documentary filmmaking, consisting of footage of New York City from 1960 that’s pieced together with a wonderful jazz score. Let me tell you that Kirschheimer’s work is very relaxing to watch and Free Time is no exception. Plus the hour-long movie will premiere in Film Forum’s Virtual Cinema, accompanied by Rudy Burckhardt’s 1953 film Under the Brooklyn Bridge which captures Brooklyn in the ‘50s.
Also opening in Film Forum’s Virtual Cinema Friday is Hong Khaou’s MONSOON (Strand Releasing) starring Henry Golding (Crazy Rich Asians) as Kit, who returns to Ho Chi Minh City for the first time since his family fled after the Vietnam War when he was six. As he tries to make sense of it, he ends in a romance with Parker Sawyers’ American ex-pat and forms a friendship with a local student (Molly Harris). Unfortunately, I didn’t have the chance to watch this one before finishing up this column but hope to catch soon, because I do like Golding as an actor.
I shared my thoughts on Werner Herzog and Clive Oppenheimer’s FIREBALL: VISITORS FROM DARK WORLDS, when it played at TIFF in September, but this weekend, it will debut on Apple TV+.  It’s another interesting and educational science doc from Herr Herzog, this time teaming with the younger Cambridge geoscientist and “volcanologist” to look at the evidence left behind by meteors that have arrived within the earth’s atmosphere, including the races that worship the falling space objects.
Opening at the Metrograph this week (or rather on its website) is Shalini Kantayya’s documentary CODED BIAS, about the widespread bias in facial recognition and the algorithms that affect us all, which debuted Weds night and will be available on a PPV basis and will be available through November 17. The French New Wave anthology Six In Paris will also be available as a ticketed movie ($8 for members/$12 for non-members) through April 13. Starting Thursday as part of the Metrograph’s “Live Screenings” is Steven Fischler and Joel Sucher’s Free Voice of Labor: The Jewish Anarchists from 1980. Fischler’s earlier doc Frame Up! The imprisonment of Martin Sostre from 1974 will also be available through Thursday night.
Sadly, there are just way too many movies out this week, and some of the ones I just wasn’t able to get to include:
Dating Amber (Samuel Goldwyn) The Giant (Vertical) I Am Greta (Hulu) Dirty God (Dark Star Pictures) Where She Lies (Gravitas Ventures) Maybe Next Year (Wavelength Productions) Come Away (Relativity) Habitual (National Amusements) The Ride (Roadside Attractions, Forest, ESX) Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey (Netflix) Transference: A Love Story (1091) Sasquatch Among the Wildmen (Uncork’d) All Joking Aside (Quiver Distribution) Secret Zoo (MPI Medi Group/Capelight Pictures)
By the way, if you read this week’s column and have bothered to read this far down, I think you’re very special and quite good-looking. Feel free to drop me some thoughts at Edward dot Douglas at Gmail dot Com or drop me a note or tweet on Twitter. I love hearing from readers … honest!
1 note · View note
Note
lol binch if I did it you do too, 1-100
lmaoooo spiteful, but whatevs, also mine are gonna be more boring sorry.
1: Is there a boy/girl in your life? Nope! 
2: Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?
Yes in the sense that they’re in my life and I love them but I guess not fully in the sense that I’ll still feel upset sometimes. 
3: What do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”
I think of cats. Like what
4: What’s something you really want right now?
To be comfy with my body so I don’t have to stress about it over the summer
5: Are you afraid of falling in love?
No, I’m more afraid of not falling in love (sorry for how fake deep that sounds but for real)
6: Do you like the beach?
Very much, it will be my main habitat over the summer hopefully
7: Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?
Yes, at like sleepovers, with their feet in my face. Romantic haha
8: What’s the background on your cell?
Amber, it makes me homesick but I like it anyways
9: Name the last four beds you were sat on?
Mine in college, mine at home, Tu’s, and emme’s
10: Do you like your phone?
I’m very indifferent about it
11: Honestly, are things going the way you planned?
No not really, I’m very okay with it but sometimes I feel like more is expected from me and it stresses me out. 
12: Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?
My chemistry lab partner sophie’s
13: Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler?
Neither are my fav breed but I knew a really friendly cute rottweiler when i was a kid so that probably
14: Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?
As someone who is overly emotional I’d say emotional pain but I’ve never been through a physical pain that has lasted beyond a dull ache.
15: Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?
I’ve never been to an art museum so I’d love to go to one for the experience but a zoo is a guaranteed good time
 16: Are you tired?
Mentally yes, but I can’t physically fall asleep haha
17: How long have you known your 1st phone contact?
Alex Raydan, I’ve known him since 1st grade
18: Are they a relative?
Nope
19: Would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?
Nah
20: When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?
tonight
21: If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?
I don’t think it would be necessary, but if you could guarantee they were the person I’d want to be with all my life, then yeah I suppose 
22: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Maybe in the right context
23: How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?
I have one hair tie on each wrist for balance, does that count
24: Is there a certain quote you live by?
“Don’t get mad. Don’t get even. Do better. Much better. Become so engulfed in your own success you forget it ever happened.” lmao literally just a quote I found on tumblr but I like it a lot and it makes me feel stronger so 
25: What’s on your mind?
u kno I’m plannin my summer aesthetic 24/7
26: Do you have any tattoos?
No, hoping to get some soon
27: What is your favorite color?
Deep green
28: Next time you will kiss someone on the lips?
I have no idea haha, hopefully over the summer but no guarantees lmao
29: Who are you texting?
No one at the moment
30: Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?
yes
31: Have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?
yes
32: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
yes, i feel pretty comfy talking to michael, darious and zany. Gettin more comfy with vincent and tu now as well
33: Do you think anyone has feelings for you?
Not particularly
34: Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?
Yes, it’s always very appreciated
35: Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?
I’d be pretty weirded out and wish they would stop lmao
36: Were you single on Valentines Day?
Yessss
37: Are you friends with the last person you kissed?
Yes, i am
38: What do your friends call you?
Binch, dude, bb, bbygirl, aside from the typical just Nikki
39: Has anyone upset you in the last week?
Yes, but my bar for getting upset is pretty low oops
40: Have you ever cried over a text?
Yeah haha I have most of my serious conversations over text cuz I’m a lil bitch
41: Where’s your last bruise located?
Right in the center of my chest
42: What is it from?
Bra was too tight and pressed into my chest
43: Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?
Physics lecture last Tuesday when I was running on 3 hrs of sleep
44: Who was the last person you were on the phone with?
My mom
45: Do you have a favourite pair of shoes?
Yep, white sneakers
46: Do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?
No I look considerably worse in hats
47: Would you ever go bald if it was the style?
Probably not I like my hair a lot
48: Do you make supper for your family?
No but my mom deserves it lol so I should try
49: Does your bedroom have a door?
Yes haha
50: Top 3 web-pages?
tumblr, netflix, hulu
51: Do you know anyone who hates shopping?
my mom and dad both hate it
52: Does anything on your body hurt?
Yeah I worked out yesterday so my thighs and stomach hurt
53: Are goodbyes hard for you?
Extremely, I always build them up in my head so I’m always a little underwhelmed and unsatisfied when I leave
54: What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?
water
55: How is your hair?
It’s okay, I really need to get it cut, it’s lacking any style lmao
56: What do you usually do first in the morning?
Brushing my teeth is always first
57: Do you think two people can last forever?
Yeah I think so, but I think it involves a lot of compromise and effort
58: Think back to January 2007, were you single? hahaha yes
59: Green or purple grapes? purple for sure, the darker the better
60: When’s the next time you will give someone a BIG hug?
Probably june 15th when I say goodbye to my roommates for the summer 
61: Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?
Yes, I wish I were home
62: When will be the next time you text someone?
Probably tomorrow afternoon
63: Where will you be 5 hours from now?
Sleppin
64: What were you doing at 8 this morning.
Sleppin
65: This time last year, can you remember who you liked?
Kyle 
66: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?
Tommy melts my heart he’s precious, same with Charlotte
67: Did you kiss or hug anyone today?
no kissing, and I’m pretty sure no hugging either
68: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?
lmao “why is no one responding to me”
69: Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?
Yes maybe once or twice, but usually I’ve gotten what I’ve wanted out of situations so go me
70: How many windows are open on your computer?
4
71: How many fingers do you have?
all of them thankfully
72: What is your ringtone?
the default
73: How old will you be in 5 months?
Still 19 haha
74: Where is your Mum right now?
In vista CA no one try to find her and kill her pls
75: Why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?
Just wasn’t right I guess
76: Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?
No I have not
77: Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?
Yes!
78: Do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?
Brody Barnhill
79: Is there anyone you know with the name Mike?
Pipe down Mike
80: Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?
Nooope
81: How many people have you liked in the past three months?
I have very fleeting interests in college, but people I’ve liked for more than a few days would be zero haha
82: Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?
Emme and tracy are constantly seeing me in my underwear
83: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?
Nope
84: You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?
Kelsey and Amber probably and both of them are telling me to fucking stop
85: If your BF/GF was into drugs would you care?
Yeah, if it was habitual use
86: What was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?
I almost wasn’t allowed to see Baywatch because I didn’t think it was rated R and apparently I do not look 17 and my college ID wasn’t proof enough that I was at least 18 lmao
87: Who was your last received call from?
Me mum
88: If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?
Yes
89: What is something you wish you had more of?
Money and motivation lmao
90: Have you ever trusted someone too much?
Perhaps, but it’s never been to much of an issue, just embarrassing for me sometimes
91: Do you sleep with your window open?
Yes it gets very hot in this room
92: Do you get along with girls?
Pretty much 100% of the time
93: Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?
Nope
94: Does sex mean love?
Nope 
95: You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?
Nah, maybe a little boring after a while but that’s all
96: Have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?
No, I don’t know how I’d feel about it, I feel like I’d be afraid of pulling it somehow
97: Did you sleep alone this week?
All the time haha
98: Everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?
Yes, I do haha
99: Do you believe in love at first sight?
Not particularly, it sounds nice tho
100: Who was the last person that you pinky promise?
I think emme, she likes that kind of stuff 
Hope this made you feel better Michael lmao
1 note · View note
Text
This is my story of a beautiful relationship gone horribly wrong.
CHAPTER 1 HOW IT ALL STARTED So I was going into my junior year of high school and I realized that I was ready to have something real with someone worth it but I didn't have any young men in mind. also, I wanted to stay on top o my grades because the most important thing to me at this point in my life is being something and making my parents proud. Then I was in my Homeroom the next couple weeks after the first day of school and I was watching our morning announcements and I saw this handsome young man that I had noticed from previous years because he had this unique hairstyle that always caught my attention. So at this point, I really wanted to talk to him and get to know him because he seemed like a fun chilled guy that I could really relate to. I was really horrified to just walk up to him and say hi to him. for weeks I was going around school trying not to make eye contact but take the closet look as possible. So then I went to New York city with my cousin Danny for her sweet 16th birthday and New York is such an amazing place and it really got me thinking and I realized that is was time for me to be my own person and stand up and say what I wanted and make it known no more hiding how I feel. And I made a promise to my cousin my little sister mary and my friend June he would be mind. mary told me not to waste my time she knew because he lived in her neighborhood and for some reason, she thought he was weird. Most people do because how he's so introverted he is, it's kinda upsetting how bad he is about that. But, anyways then one of my friends that I called “my wife” her name is jewel  She was fun and cool crazy girl she was a senior at the time and she was one of my closest friends at the time and she was somewhat friends with the young man she kept saying his name was Kyle so I was running around talking about how I think kyle is so cute. So then I go to my other friend named sean. Sean was that guy friend that you have known for years then you fell off but you never stopped loving him. Anyways, He told me there was no guy by the description I was giving the guy But there was a guy named joe that he was friends with and balled with from time to time in gym class that I was probably talking about so the next class I came to class with a picture of the kyle/joe on my phone and he started laughing so hard and was like yeah his name is joe he a senior you think he cute? I told him yes very do u think you could help me get to know him he said I don't know he not really looking for anything right now but I will try and see what I can do. so a week or so went by nothing had come back from sam he just said “hey I showed him a picture of you, he thinks your cute so that's a good sign right?’ in my head I just thought he probably lied or thinks I'm a catfish because he kept telling sean that he never see’s me at school. Let me tell you a little something about me. I never ever really try to be cute when going to school once I became upper classmen I had given upon being cute for school. there was no one left for me to get cute for anymore. I'm a yoga pants hoodie type of girl with a sloppy bun to top it off. When I went out with my friends or went to church on the weekend I would do me makeup and get super cute because my mom always told me you never know who you might run into in the street. I really felt like I had nothing to prove to anyone in my school so why to try every day they can see my beauty every once in a while just in case they forget. Never sleep on the hoodie and sweatpants girl. So then another few days went by I thought enough is enough I'm just texting this boy and be bold. so I made a group chat with a few of my friends at the time Sean, Jewel, Jessica, Kayla and RJ and I told them hey you guys who ever gets me some type of contact information for Joe first gets a 10.00 chipotle gift card. so I swear to you, not within 10 minutes Jewel had come up with his kik. KIK was a personal messenger app that we used a lot back in the day before everyone had iPhones just because it was a free app and we could group chat. Anyways it took me a while to come up with the right message that I would want to say to him to start off the conversation without seeming like a weirdo. CHAPTER 2 MAKING IT HAPPEN So finally got my message together and I said “ hey I'm Kristin the girl sam has been telling you about and I just thought I should text you and stop being a creep around school because I find you very attractive and I didn't know how to approach you……so yea. So he responded hey thank you but I'm not really looking for anything serious right now so can we just be friends for the time being I told him it was fine so we began our friendship talking every day we found out we had a few things in common. Like we were born literally a day apart from each other His birthday was November 12, my birthday was November 13 the same exact year we had the same favorite colors we both had a deep love of music tv and movies. We both liked J. cole drake school boy Q and a lot more. We first starting talking in September if I wanted to be exact I would have to say the 14 because I got my iPhone 10 days later and he was the first person I ever faced timed. So first real bonding then we had I went to a lock in at my ex-best friends church and I got there and one of my exes’s were there and this girl that hates my cousin but it was a pretty big church so I was fine but at first I was freaking out and I texted him the whole time he claimed me down he even talked to me on the phone promising everything would be ok. I knew that he cared and he was a keeper just from that night alone. Then within those ten days I had to stay after school to work on a commercial for yearbook and I asked him if he wanted to stay after school to help with it, of course, he said sure so I met up with him at the lockers that day and went to the yearbook room no one was there which was very strange, but he didn't feel well anyway so he ended up laying on my chest as I played with his hair and looked out the window and held him and kissed all over his face thinking about life also took some pictures together I would do anything to go back to that day but can't reverse time. so in the evenings We would be on face time listening to music singing together and I mine like the cutest songs my favorite song to sing with him was Mine Feat drake by Beyonce it was so cute. But I never told him this but I planned on singing that song to him on our wedding day if we made it there while I walked down the aisle. All of that but the crazy thing is we just loved talking to each other so much we would stay up till like 5 am just talking knowing we had to get up at 6 Am for school but neither of us wanted to hang it just felt so good to wake up to his voice. He was a great person to tell my problems to and express how I was feeling. We would face time every day and we would always talk about our days and anything really exciting that happen that day. We would even gossip together about stuff that we heard about other people. I had no problem ever telling him anything because one thing I can tell you about joe is he would never tell your secrets or anything too crazy. He keeps to himself a lot anyways so it wasn't hard but any how He really became my right hand my best friend because of my best friend at that the time was one of the most negative people you could ever meet. She did have my back in a lot of cases but she ended up stabbing me right in it. He was the only person I wanted to talk to at night. A day without talking to him felt like a decade. I know that truly was in loved with him but by the end of this story I realized he didn't deserve all my love.By November we were closer than you could ever imagine we both felt like we had known each other for years.
CHAPTER 3 THE BIRTHDAYS So for his birthday I did something I thought he would like a lot. I made a picture collage with pictures of me and him and our longest face time we had ever done which was like 11 hours and some change that was a great weekend I had a yearbook deadline coming up and I was in charged of senior ads so I was up very very very late that night pushing to get a certain amount done for this first deadline and I also had to hope on a few other people pages and finish up stuff so we could meet the deadline. Deadlines are super important in yearbook world for one if a page is late it costs us money every day that it's late the more money we put out on late stuff the less food we get and less likely we are to get food in yearbook and I love free food who doesn't but I also have I love for yearbook I don't know why but I do. But, I put that picture collage on his locker day of his birthday so everyone could see. At first, I thought he wasn't going to it or he was going take it down but he left it up all day and it made me so very happy. Also, I went and bought him a pair of graphic socks but I put a twist to it. I bought a pack of individual skittle packs put a song quote on each pack of skittles and stuffed them in the socks because he loved skittles and he said all he wanted for his birthday was some graphic socks. But if you know me I don't just do regular gifts I have to make it deep and sentimental. So I put the skittles in the socks also gave him card wrote a nice message about how grateful I was to meet a guy like him and that we would forever be friends I also mention that he was definitely brought into my life for a reason and not a damn season. The man was I wrong or what but we get to that latter. Then I went and got him a chance the rapper phone case because he has he-man crush on that guy. When I tell you he has the biggest man crush on that man that you could ever imagine he really does he would do anything for that man. The phone case thing happens I hated the fact that he had a pink phone case. Like, let me give you an example you have a nice somewhat sexy picture from your boo and then they have a rainbow cast because they sprained their hand playing basketball and then the other hand their holding pink phone case so not sexy. So I thought he would like this. so he took the bag and just looked in and was like “Omg you got me socks thanks”. I was just yeah no problem. Then I had to stay after school for the yearbook that day so he faces timed me while I was still there like omg I didn't know all this was inside the socks and the phone case thank you so much I really appreciate this. what really touched me is when he told me no one had ever done anything like this for him before so I felt special.Then he showed his parents what did for him while I was still on the phone with him so I could hear all their nice comments it was so nice. But I kinda felt bad because the skittles were going down in his cast but that's not really my fault he sprained his hand after I had already got his gift together. he's somewhat aggressive when he plays basketball so feel like somehow it was his fault when he first did it I was worried sick. I was just sitting in my math class then I get a text saying I'm at the hospital didn't find out for hours why he was there. When he told me I could have killed him I was worried for what a thumb.
0 notes