#moist man...

[nipuni]

⚰️ A speedpaint video of this will be available at my Patreon on august 1st!

#the phantom of the opera #phantom of the opera #phantom #erik #my art #here have a a sad man #sorry the packaging is a little morbid and moist #he is having a moment #so am I ...god I'm so drained my mental health is in the negatives

[doctors-star]

thinking about how the watch books and the moist books are all about the city, and what would happen if it was moist given charge of the city watch and vimes working in the post office. the easy answer is obviously that it wouldn't work; lipwig's heart lies in selling sizzle, whereas vimes' primary interest is ascertaining where the sausage was on the night in question. but i'm compelled by moist looking at criminality from the other side - it's the same thought process, but the criminal should end up inside the cell, the patrician beams - suddenly faced more often with the consequences of petty crimes, with the victims, with the messy nasty aftermath. vimes, drunk and depressed in a dead-end job in the post office, which no-one uses or respects anyway, seeing the next postmaster die and hearing about the clacksmen dying and deciding: no more. moist would think carrot was his parole officer; vimes would struggle, somewhat, with a nine foot man of clay hiding the bearhuggers all the time. the watch would be shiny and sexy and the post office wouldn't be, not at all, but there would be a very angry man hauling letters about the place, mumbling to himself about setting them on fire because he's not having someone else's words in his damn head. the summoning dark wouldn't like lipwig; he knows its tricks. moist wouldn't arrest an army, or the patrician, because he doesn't believe in the law that way, but he'd talk everyone into such confusion that they'd forget what he was ambassadoring for in the first place. vimes wouldn't race the clacks, but he'd check the vault for gold properly when he took on the bank and get its previous owners arrested, causing widespread chaos and giving lipwig a headache. it'd work out of sheer bloody-mindedness and love of the city and it would shake out all wrong - but it would shake out nonetheless.

also lipwig would think it was so funny, being head cop, and vimes would love playing with trains. they deserve that.

#discworld #moist von lipwig #sam vimes #rest assured moist is also investigating a break in at the golem trust and sam is shyly delivering dragon medicine up scoone avenue #any man that fond of driving a riverboat would love playing trains #this is your captain speaking

[jowdraws]

I spent a lot of time working out what Vetinari is. Vox Populi and Vox Phantasma - now those are easy. But what is Vetinari the voice of? The voice of the city? not really. He's just the voice of Vetinari, really.

#One man one vote #voice of the people - voice of the dreams - voice of the tyrant lol #ankh morpork #sam vimes #havelock vetinari #moist von lipwig #discworld #digital

[pratchettquotes]

There is a saying, "You can't fool an honest man," which is much quoted by people who make a profitable living by fooling honest men. Moist never tried it, knowingly anyway. If you did fool an honest man, he tended to complain to the local Watch, and these days they were harder to buy off. Fooling dishonest men was a lot safer and, somehow, more sporting. And, of course, there were so many more of them. You hardly had to aim.

Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

#moist von lipwig #going postal #discworld #terry pratchett #con man #crime #honest #an honest man #dishonesty #human nature #psychology #fool me once #low risk #more sporting #you hardly had to aim

[suchawrathfullamb]

honestly, fics underestimate Will sexually. he's always the one taking pleasure bc Hannibal is such a sex master, and hey, I'm sure he is, he certainly has the vibes and he knows the human body very well, but like...What if Will is a more discreet sex master? justice for Will, let him showcase his talents

#I want fics where Hannibal is just as taken and impressed and in awe as Will usually is #my water logged man has talents I know it #let the moist king put the D to the task #hannigram #nbc hannibal #hannibal #will graham #murder husbands #hannibal lecter

[potato-lord-but-not]

"tell me your woes"

my woes is moist losing the poll to a guy i know nothing about 😔

I feel your pain and I drew to cope

#not making my man moist look good at all but idc #he killed him in cold blood #ask

[washed-up-wurmcoil]

I love how much the Ankh-Morpork protagonists hate each other.

#Discworld #Sam Vimes #William de Worde #moist von lipwig #Police Chief vs Newspaper Editor vs Government Hype Man

[negrowhat]

We never talked about Miyata silently losing his shit when Iwanaga was speaking in English.

#had that man MOIST idc #love is better the second time around #koi wo suru nara nidome ga joto

[archdemoning]

i forgot about this picture i took during the splatfest. effervescent

#code from the corner #splatoon #splatoon 3 #big man #i LOVE how he glistens #moist lad

[p4nishers]

my absolute favorite thing in reaper man is terry naming a god "hoki the jokester". like. he couldn't even be bothered to change another letter i love him sm

#his names are fucking ridiculous i love them #like fym there's a character named carrot. and moist. and ridcully. and fucking teater and. he's just too good at it #gnu terry pratchett #discworld #discworld death #reaper man

[i-am-dulaman]

Guys I just had a horrible thought. You know all those posts of people complaining about like oranges burning their tongue or something only to find out they're allergic?? I used to laugh at them. But. is moisturizer supposed to make your face burn???? Pls say yes or else I've been putting poison on my face for years

#seriously #it only occured to me right now as i put moisturizer on my face #and i was like man i hate the burning part but i guess its worth it for a moist face or whatever idk #and then i was like 'heh i sound like those people about to find out theyre allergic to fruit' #'wait a minute' #😳 #😭

[sourgrenadine]

HELP I WAS TRYING TO DRAW JOHNATHON BUT IT JUST LOOKS LIKE MOISTCR1T1KAL

#johnathon ohnn #the spot #spiderverse #spider man: across the spider verse #across the spider verse #my art #moist critikal

[pratchettquotes]

"Now...will you take the job? No one will recognize you, I am sure. No one ever recognizes you, it would appear."

Moist shrugged. "Oh, all right. Of course, I accept as a natural-born criminal, habitual liar, fraudster, and totally untrustworthy perverted genius."

"Capital! Welcome to government service!" said Lord Vetinari, extending his hand. "I pride myself on being able to pick the right man."

Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

#moist von lipwig #havelock vetinari #going postal #discworld #terry pratchett #con man #interview #job interview #job description #government #crime #criminal #welcome to government service #the right man

[little-spoon-izzy]

Con’s instagram

#izzy hands #our flag means death #ofmd #con o'neill #con oneill #con o’neill #poor man #but hashtag moist #he knows what he’s doing

[domysterio]

Dominik Mysterio | NXT - October 10th 2023

#my man is SO moist SO pathetic #this is an incomplete gifset but i'm posting bc i'll never finish it #dominik mysterio #wweedit #mysterio gifs #10-10-23 #flashing

[bitchthefuck1]

Rip to Kaz Brekker, you would have loved Moist von Lipwig

#terry pratchett the man that you are... #anyways moist and kaz are the same flavor of guy in a different genre #Going Postal is a great read bit of a slow start but by the end its just perfect #moist von lipwig #kaz brekker #discworld