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#misty days in nature. a day for the creative to show in you
ghost-1-y · 7 months
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trust me - sanemi shinazugawa
Pairing: sanemi x afab!tsuguko!reader
!!PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS BEFORE CONTINUING!!
TW: major character death (reader), no happy ending (hurt/no comfort), mentions & descriptions of gore & injury, brief thoughts of self-harm (Sanemi - briefly mentioned, doesn’t actually happen), consensual sex (Sanemi and reader are 18+), penetrative sex, unprotected sex, handjob, oral (m! and f! receiving), creampie, Sanemi is pussy drunk in this lmao; spanking (happens once), slight manhandling, praise kink, spitting kink(?) (Sanemi spits in readers mouth), (very) slight olfactophilia, brief mention of vomit (again, doesn’t actually happen), mention of scars (Sanemi and reader) MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI - I WILL BLOCK YOU
CW: fluff; general angst; arguments between Sanemi and reader; Sanemi is a bit of a meanie at times :/ (aka Sanemi being Sanemi); mentions of food/eating; descriptions of wound care; love confessions; Sanemi uses the following pet names for reader: “baby”, “pretty”, “beautiful”, and “sweetheart”
Word Count: ~6.2k
A/N: this is my first fic, so I hope that y’all enjoy it! I’m not gonna lie I was superrr nervous to post this lol so please be nice🥲🥲 I’ll probably do a fluffy comfort fic for Sanemi after this to make up for the pain lol; also wanted to let y’all know that this was half-inspired by the song “Fragile” by Laufey, so go give that a listen if you’d like!
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Quiet. 
As the dewy drops of the morning mist came into contact with his bare hands, Sanemi noted the silence of the sunrise – one would believe that its light denoted respite, a time of peace – something beautiful to behold as its rays began to gently sweep across the grassy field. He could not yet hear the calls of the mourning dove, for it was too early for the birds to grace anyone’s ears with their softening sounds.
However, as Sanemi continued his way through the tall blades, his hands wet with the remnants of night, respite gave way to apprehension, and the misty air was filled with a sense of malaise.
For the mist that lowly hovered above the grass was red.
––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––
One year ago.
“You can’t expect me to treat you differently from them.” Sanemi pointed his blade to the lower-ranked slayers on the sidelines of the training grounds, those who hadn’t passed out yet being completely keeled over or having nearly drowned themselves in water to stave off the summer heat. “If you want to handle stronger opponents, I need to ensure that you are trained well enough to do so.”
Having been at the point of near-exhaustion herself, Y/N could barely muster a reply. “I know, Shinazugawa-san,” she panted while looking up at him from her not-so-flattering position on the ground. “Why else do you think I’m here? ‘s not like I enjoy being trained half-to-death,” she replied sarcastically.
Sanemi’s glare met her. “You should consider yourself lucky that I was gracious enough to let you train under me. At the rate you’re going, I’d half expect you to move down a rank, rather than up one.” He walked towards her and, despite his cold nature, offered Y/N his scarred hand. “Get up. I’m not lettin’ you go until you can knock me down to my knees.”
A challenge she knew to be nearly impossible with the skill level she was currently at, Y/N wondered if her rank of Hinoto meant anything against the Wind Pillar himself. She took his roughened hand in hers and stood up, and, after a poor attempt at dusting the dirt off of her uniform, steeled herself once more for the upcoming attack from the man glaring across from her. 
Sanemi tightened his grip on the hilt of his sword and started lunging toward her.
–––––
Y/N continued to train under Sanemi’s watch, each day somehow more grueling than the last. She woke up at the god-awful hours of the morning and trained until midnight. This repeated day in and day out for weeks, with seemingly nothing to show for it except a bunch of creative insults that she’d managed to add to her arsenal after receiving them from Sanemi himself.
“You’re not using your sword correctly,” he pointed out. It was always something, she thought – her stance was wrong, her breathing wasn’t efficient enough, and now she apparently couldn’t even hold her sword correctly.
By the time she looked up at Sanemi, frustrated with her apparent inadequacies, he was no longer in front of her, having walked around so that her back faced him. He placed his hand on her forearm, “just– move your arms here…good, and your hands should be like this–” he spoke softly into her ear as he adjusted her grip to what he deemed satisfactory. Y/N was thankful that Sanemi stood behind her as she felt an intense warmth flood across her cheeks. By the time he was finished, Y/N noted the lightest blush on the tips of his ears as he returned to his original spot and took his own offensive stance, clearly not intending nor wanting to address the familiarity of his previous actions. 
“Now you don’t have any excuses to have such a shitty attack pattern,” he quipped, before engaging her in battle once more.
As months passed, the Wind Pillar slowly transitioned from insults to providing Y/N with actual guidance, and she was slowly reminded of why exactly she requested to become his Tsuguko in the first place. One day, while she was taking her thirty-minute lunch break at the wooden chabudai inside of the Wind Pillar’s estate, Sanemi sat next to her and started to eat his own meal. He refused to look at her, but the words he uttered from his mouth sent relief through her veins.
“You’ve gotten stronger.”
Unsure of how to respond, as compliments were rare coming from the usually rather hostile Pillar, Y/N simply nodded and whispered a “thank you,” continuing to pick at her food. Eventually, she looked over at him and noticed that he was frowning at the wooden chabudai before him, an internal conflict seemingly battling out in his mind.
“I have a mission I’ve been assigned to, I’d like you to come with me.”
His words were quiet, almost hesitant.
“You want me to assist you?” she asked, mainly because she didn’t believe Sanemi had trusted her enough to bring her on a mission assigned to a Hashira, much less himself.
Sanemi nodded in response. “Lower-ranked slayers have been going missing in one of the nearby mountains,” he sighed. “If it were up to me, I wouldn’t have named them slayers in the first place if they’re stupid enough to get caught by some demon.” He paused, and then finally looked at her. “I think that you’re capable enough to help me should things get out of hand,” he added quietly.
A sense of warmth flooded through her, and she smiled at him, grateful that he had finally acknowledged the hard work she’d put into all of her training. “Thank you, Shinazugawa-san. I promise that I will do my best.”
Sanemi thought to himself that he would like to see more of that smile.
“Don’t think that just ‘cause I’ve seen you improve that it means I’m gonna let you take it easy from here on out,” he said as he stood up. “Also, if you get into trouble on this mission, I want you to call for me immediately. Don’t get yourself into some shit you can’t handle,” he added, and his gaze upon her suddenly hardened as the words left his mouth. “Let me deal with it if things get too difficult.”
With that, he left to head back towards the training grounds.
–––––
That night, Y/N followed closely behind as Sanemi hiked up the mountain, with the bitter cold becoming more apparent as patches of snow were slowly augmented by the tiny flakes falling around them. Every once in a while, they’d find some blood splatter or human entrails, with such carnage becoming more frequent as they continued their trek. 
Eventually, Sanemi stopped – Y/N had learned to trust his instinct when he sensed that something was off. Sanemi brushed his hand over the hilt of his sword and gripped it tightly, his muscles tensing with anticipation, which caused Y/N to echo his actions and grab her own sword, holding it so that she was prepared for any possible enemy attack.
Or so she thought.
A blast of icy wind came from her right, forcing Y/N to close her eyes lest her corneas were to freeze from the frigid temperature. Sanemi, however, immediately chased after the source – his speed something frightening to behold. After a futile attempt to follow him, Y/N found herself swarmed by fifteen demons, all of whom were nearly identical to each other, as they all possessed the same pale blue skin and white hair. After a few attacks, Y/N also noted that their blood demon art was the same: one that would allow them to manipulate freezing winds and ice however they pleased.
Y/N was able to hear Sanemi in the distance, easily decapitating what seemed to be a larger swarm than what she was presently dealing with. Just how many of them are there? Y/N thought as she made her way through twelve of the demons, decapitating each one until an attack managed to hit her mid-air – causing a sharp ice fragment to deeply slice open her upper thigh. Gritting through the pain, she finished off the final three demons that she’d been fighting before slowly limping toward a nearby tree to assess the damage of her wound. It seemed as though Sanemi’s battle was also over, as Y/N could hear nothing but the howling of the mountainous winds as he walked back over to where they both had split up.
Once Sanemi caught sight of her, his shoulders seemed to relax. However, such relief was temporary once he eyed her bleeding thigh, and immediately began rushing over to her, pulling out some spare gauze that he had stored on his person and a wave of anger that she couldn’t describe filling the violet hues of his eyes.
“What did I fuckin’ tell you? To stay back and let me handle it, yet you’re so stupid that you can’t even obey direct orders,” Sanemi spat at her as he started bandaging the deep laceration on her thigh, taking careful consideration of the pressure and tightness of the gauze wrap he was using. Each time she winced, he would look up from her injury, and his violet eyes would meet hers. However, there was no malice of the words he spewed at her within his expanded pupils.
Y/N sharply inhaled before responding. “I’m sorry! But you’re the one who went on ahead and left me with them! I had to–”
“No. You didn’t have to, you fuckin’ dumbass. That’s where you’re wrong – you didn’t have to put yourself in danger just because I was off dealing with something else. Fuckin’ think next time and maybe I wouldn’t have to be cleaning you up like this,” he lightly choked on the last few words, yet continued wrapping up her wound, hands gentle and considerate of her pain. Y/N huffed at his impossible reasoning and looked down at him with a hardened stare.
He looked into her eyes once more, his grip on her uninjured leg tightening. “I don’t- I can’t fuckin’ lose someone else,” he stated, a rare glimpse of vulnerability from inside his tortured heart. At that, Y/N dropped her stare and hesitantly placed her hand upon his tensed one.
“I’m sorry, Shinazugawa-san, I promise that next time will be different. I’ll get stronger, so you won’t have to go to such lengths for me.” She gave him a reassuring smile, and his hand relaxed as he continued his work on her wounded leg. With the sun still rising over the horizon, she couldn’t make out the brimming of tears on his waterline before he blinked them away.
It was a side of Sanemi that Y/N hadn’t seen before – but before she could indulge herself to begin examining every crevice of emotion that the Wind Pillar had put on display for her, his attitude changed once again to one of apparent indifference.
“Don’t apologize – just listen to me next time,” he stated as he finished wrapping up her leg. Once a couple of hours passed and the Kakushi had arrived to clean up the aftermath, he stood up and grabbed Y/N’s arm to pull her up from her sitting position. Sanemi then took the same arm and put it around his shoulder, allowing her to use him as a crutch as they both walked to the wagon brought by one of the Kakushi in the aftermath of the battle.
The ride to the Butterfly Mansion was mostly quiet. Sanemi, despite not being injured himself, decided to stay with Y/N as she slept on the floor of the wagon. The cold of the early morning seemed to be permeating Y/N’s skin as she shivered in her sleep. Always aware of his surroundings, Sanemi looked at her with concern and took off his haori, feeling slightly flushed as he placed it on top of her as a makeshift blanket, blaming the warmth of his cheeks on the cold morning air. He sat down next to her, crossing his arms and closing his eyes to alleviate some of his own fatigue.
It didn’t help that in his dreams, his body was keeping her warm instead.
–––––
Once Y/N had woken up, she first noted the sanitary scent of the patient room assigned to her. Having awoken from the gentle knock on the door, she looked to see Aoi entering with some gauze and antibiotics.
Sanemi was nowhere in sight.
“I’m glad you’re awake. I’m here to perform some general wound care for you. I’ll be changing your dressings, alright?” Aoi looked at her, and once she received a nod from Y/N, she proceeded to unwrap the layers of gauze and started to inspect the wound.
“There is some slight inflammation,” she observed as she lightly pressed against the sides of the laceration with her gloved hands, which exhibited some redness and swelling. “I’m going to be prescribing you some antibiotics in order to prevent any potential infections.” She started applying some antibiotic ointment directly to the wound, and Y/N winced at the stinging pain that it caused. Once satisfied, Aoi carefully rewrapped the wound with a new set of gauze. “Your antibiotics will need to be taken orally with food and water once a day. Make sure you complete the entire course that I prescribe so that you don’t face any further complications down the line.” 
All Y/N could do was nod silently, and once Aoi determined that she would follow directions, she left the room.
–––––
Despite wanting to thank him for helping her in the aftermath of the battle, Y/N had not seen Sanemi even once during her recovery process. She wondered if he had gone back to his estate, but it still struck her as odd that he didn’t at least come by to berate her for the lack of judgment she possessed in the midst of the fight.
Maybe he got it all out of his system when he was wrapping up my wound, she thought to herself.
During her stay as a patient, Aoi mentioned to Y/N that due to the cut slicing through the muscle of her leg, it could take weeks or even months to recover. Since Y/N had not yet mastered Total Concentration Breathing: Constant, Aoi explained that it may take longer to heal compared to if a Hashira had such an injury.
Y/N wondered if Sanemi no longer trusted her skills as a slayer.
She wondered if Sanemi ever had any trust in her at all. 
The very thought caused bile to rise in her throat. She wanted him to be proud of her, to trust her – just as she did with him.
Y/N slowly got up from her bed and walked outside to sit on the engawa of the Butterfly Mansion. The moon’s rise was slow, and the soft chirp of crickets could be heard from the nearby trees. Once sat, she admired the garden owned by the Insect Pillar herself – with beautiful azaleas and hydrangea plants shaping pathways throughout the grounds. Y/N closed her eyes and basked in the moonlight rays that shone upon the estate – that is, until her ears heard the softest creak of wood coming from behind her.
“Shinazugawa-san?” She softly whispered once she turned to see who it was, as though the peace of the night would be disturbed should she speak any louder.
Sanemi said nothing, but then moved quietly to sit down next to her – if Y/N hadn’t known any better, she would’ve believed that he was solely there just to admire the moonlit garden as well. His eyes appeared a soft, yet dark hue of indigo in the cool moonlight – they bore none of the usual aggression that they carried when around others.
“The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” Y/N asked him quietly, gaze fixed upon him, and he nodded. 
“Would be prettier if it didn’t cause so much needless death.”
She couldn’t argue at all. He was right – and would be until demons had been eradicated off the face of the earth, but that didn’t stop her from wishing that things were different.
Sanemi sighed and finally looked at her, and his eyes screamed ‘loss’. 
He was fragile. He wasn’t the roughened-up, aggressive, insolent slayer that others saw him as. Rather, it was his scars that held him together by threads, and it was his heart that silently called out to her – to “hold me, please.”
And so she did.
Y/N slowly slid her arms around him and had them reach up towards his nape. The sigh he emitted came from his chest, and Sanemi’s grip tightened around her as he buried his face in the crook of her neck. His eyes closed and brows furrowed, focused on nothing but the gentle touch of her skin against his. His mouth was slightly parted, lips pressed softly near her collarbone as he breathed against her.
His touch was warm.
She wished to feel more of it, to let it utterly consume her until all that she could feel was him. 
Once he parted from her, Y/N looked into his eyes and felt the need to speak. “I- uh, I wanted to thank you for helping me with my wound after the battle,” she admitted softly. In response, his eyes hardened again and looked down at her bandaged leg.
“Don’t mention it,” he replied shortly before getting up. Soon after, Y/N found herself alone on the engawa once again, although the peaceful silence of the night had been replaced with a feeling of despondency that she couldn’t quite place.
–––––
By the time she recovered from her injury, it seemed as though Sanemi had done the impossible by making Y/N’s training even more difficult. Not a day went by when she wasn’t completely collapsed on the ground by sunset. It only took a few days before dark shadows under her eyes became visible, and her muscles ached.
Gone too was Sanemi’s softer side. Instead, it seemed as though their relationship was right back where it started, sans the fact that he seemed to slightly tense every single time he caught a glimpse of her scarred leg.
The sun had set, and Sanemi was yelling at Y/N to complete one more series of reps before retiring for the night. The problem, however, was that Y/N’s legs had become gelatinous and were shaking beyond her control, and despite all the willpower that she had sustained within her, it wasn’t enough to pick herself up off the ground.
“Are you really that fuckin’ weak that you can’t even stand up by yourself?” he spat. “You should’ve never become a slayer – this shit is too dangerous for people like you. All you will ever be is demon fodder. Fuckin’ give up and leave the corps if that’s how you’re going to treat the training I give you.” His insults were never-ending, and given how exhausted she was, it took everything within her to not cry at his words.
“I’m fucking trying, Shinazugawa-san!” she choked out. “What the hell did I do for you to treat me this way? Have I not done enough already?” With tears brimming in her eyes, she musters up the courage to ask the question she’s been wondering since that night on the battlefield.
“Do you not have any trust in me at all?” she cried.
Sanemi scoffed and glared at her. “You need to earn my trust, and until you’re able to complete the training I give you without collapsing to the ground like some low-ranked slayer, then you won’t have it.”
Y/N’s stomach dropped and she ignored the tightening sensation in her throat as she resolved to bite back at the cruel man before her.
“Bullshit,” she spat. “You thought I was capable enough to assist you on the last mission. Don’t lie by saying I’ve never earned your trust before.”
Sanemi rolled his eyes. “So what? Maybe I did trust you – before the mission. But you fucking broke it by getting hurt!” he seethed, eyes wide as he looked down at her. 
“Maybe if you were capable enough to not get yourself wounded during the fight, then I might’ve still had some trust in you,” he admitted. “You think that I’m just gonna trust someone who gets their leg nearly sliced off to be able to handle themselves?”
“Is that what this is all about? ‘Cause I got some stupid cut on my leg? You can’t be serious–”
“Shut the fuck up. You know damn well it wasn’t just a cut. What if you had gotten slashed somewhere else? What if it had been more severe? What if you–” he didn’t wish to complete that sentence, lest he spoke the thought into existence.
It was the first time she’d seen Sanemi with tears in his eyes.
“It would’ve been my fault, Y/N! My fucking fault if something happened to you! I already told you, I can’t fucking lose someone else. I’ve already lost so many people, and I–” he watched as Y/N stood up, despite the obvious exhaustion in her legs, and walked towards him. “I can’t lose you, too,” he confessed, his voice softer than the wind that gently breezed through her hair. A tear had found its way down his cheek – just over the scar that was bestowed upon him by his own mother. As if by instinct, Y/N wiped it away with the pad of her thumb, but she did not part from his face. Instead, she proceeded to trace her thumb over the jagged scar, and he surprisingly leaned into the touch of her palm against his cheek, his eyes frantically searching her own. She smiled at him, and his breath caught in his throat.
“You have me, Sanemi.”
The groan that he voiced was soft, yet guttural – as though it came from deep within his chest, and he placed his hands on either side of her face, his eyes looking at her with utmost adoration and care, and his lips brushed softly against hers, and Y/N’s eyes were nearly sent reeling back before he closed the gap.
The pleasurable gasp that she emitted caused him to smile into the kiss, his lips slightly chapped, but gentle and loving with how they caressed hers, as though she would shatter under the slightest touch, or that she was a goddess and he a sinner seeking repentance by worshiping her.
“Fuck…wanted to do this for so long,” he breathed against her and his kisses became more needy – something fully welcomed by Y/N as she wrapped her arms around him and her fingers found purchase in his unruly hair. When he parted from her lips, a string of saliva connected his mouth to hers, which only broke as he went back to kiss her with his then swollen lips. He groaned once more before picking her up and carrying her over his shoulder, causing Y/N to yelp in surprise.
“Not letting you go anywhere, baby,” Sanemi grinned and smacked Y/N’s ass as he took her to his estate’s bedroom, which prompted her to roll her eyes at his antics. Yet, she couldn’t help but smile as he gently placed her on his futon and kissed her once more. “Can’t fuckin’ get enough of you, pretty,” he stated before moving down to her neck, where he licked and sucked until he found her pulse point, at which point Y/N moaned softly. “That’s right…feels good, doesn’t it?” he asked, knowing full well what her answer was even before she tried to nod her head.
“Sa- Sanemi…” she gasped, her hand cradling the back of his head as he left messy kisses up and down her neck.
“Sound so fuckin’ beautiful, keep saying my name like that, hm?” As he continued kissing her, his hands rose towards the top button of her uniform, a question of “Can I?” to which Y/N nodded. He unbuttoned her top, kissing down her chest and stomach until the clothing was fully removed. In return, Y/N helped remove the bindings that covered her breasts, letting them spill out in full view of Sanemi’s greedy irises. Sanemi wasted no time in latching his mouth to one of her tits, where he lavished her with his tongue whilst massaging and kneading the other with his roughened hand, rolling her nipple in between his fingers and playfully biting down on her breasts every so often solely to hear her whine.
“‘Nemi…need…need more please,” Y/N moaned and he chuckled. “Hm? What do you need, pretty?” Y/N only whined in response and he bit her breast again, causing her to jolt. “Need you to tell me what you want, beautiful,” he continued.
“Need your mouth…” she admitted, slightly embarrassed.
“Oh? Where do you need it?” he asked her before sucking her tit once more.
“Nngh… my– my pussy,” Y/N whined pathetically, to which Sanemi released his mouth from her breast with a lewd pop.
“Good girl,” he praised and started working towards her needy cunt, licking down her torso and leaving kisses and bites on her inner thighs. He took his time working towards her wet heat and ghosted his mouth over her panties, his hot breath permeating the cloth as she impatiently writhed underneath him. He selfishly inhaled her scent before pulling the garment to the side, and leaving a soft kiss against her core, leaving her to whimper when he pulled away to remove her panties, only for him to then lick a fat stripe up her slit. Sanemi moaned deeply and proceeded to pull Y/N towards him by her hips, ensuring that her sweetness was as close as possible to his greedy tongue.
“You taste so fucking good,” he groaned before proceeding to stuff his face full of her pussy once more. The tip of his nose nudged her swollen clit as he gathered her wetness into his mouth by licking into her tight hole and fucking her with his tongue, moaning against her pussy in the process. Y/N began bucking her hips in response, only for him to pin them down with one arm as he used his other hand to start fingering her after moving his mouth to suck on her clit. She moaned with abandon as he began curling his fingers inside of her heat, sucking voraciously on her swollen nub.
“F-Fuck, ‘Nemi! I- I’m gonna cum!” Y/N attempted to writhe underneath him, despite being held back by Sanemi’s arm pinning her down. Her admission only turned Sanemi more eager, causing him to rut against the mattress as he began quickening his fingers inside her and sucking harder on her clit. Y/N’s eyes rolled back and her mouth went agape, screaming and shaking uncontrollably as she came into his awaiting mouth. He licked up every drop that she gave him, using his fingers to coax more of her release onto his tongue, not wanting to waste any of her precious gift.
Y/N sat up and clambered onto him as soon as she came down from her orgasm, and kissed him deeply, tasting herself on his lips and tongue. “Wanna return the favor, ‘Nemi,” she whispered and he flushed red at the thought. “Yeah? Show me, pretty.” Standing up, he tilted her chin with one hand so that she was forced to look up at him from her knees. Using his other hand, he unbuckled his belt and removed it along with his hakama. His cock was thick, with pretty veins traveling all across it, making her nearly drool at the sight. Y/N brought one hand up and collected the precum from the tip of his cock with her thumb, before licking it off. Sanemi groaned, encouraging her to begin stroking his fat dick despite her hand being unable to fully reach around it. She took a curious first lick at his pretty, bulbous head, causing him to shudder, before wrapping her lips around it and sucking as she moved her hand along his thick length.
“Fuck, baby,” Sanemi groaned. Y/N moved her hand to fondle his balls and began taking on more of his length into her mouth, bobbing her head back and forth, a combination of saliva and precum coating his dick. “S-shit– you’re so good at that… fuck,” he groaned.
It took everything within Sanemi to not start fucking her throat at that moment – not wanting to hurt her as she pleasured him. He compromised by grabbing her hair and gently guiding her mouth along his cock, so that he could have some semblance of control over her movements and hence, his orgasm. Before he could cum, he removed her from his length and put his hand underneath her chin, tilting her head up towards his face – a wave of arousal shooting straight through his dick as he saw her swollen, spit-covered lips. “Open,” he commanded, and proceeded to spit into Y/N’s mouth before seeking her lips on his, demanding that she swallow. “Such a good girl for me, I’m gonna fill you up and make you feel perfect, baby,” he promised. 
Sanemi pushed her down onto the bed, spreading her legs apart with his. He stroked his cock a few times before lining it up with Y/N’s sopping pussy, selfishly rubbing it up and down her slick folds a few times. He looked into her eyes, seeing her smiling up at him before leaning down and giving a soft kiss to her lips. Y/N moaned softly — unable to wait any longer as she gently wrapped her fingers around his cock, pushing the tip into her tight cunt.
He slowly entered her heat, his shaft stretching open her spongy walls, and he let out a low moan. He lowered himself so that his chest was pressed up against her and his head was in the crook of her neck, and he took Y/N’s hands in his as he started to fuck slowly into her.
“Shit, you’re so perfect for me. You feel so good, baby,” Sanemi moaned and kissed her neck sweetly. Y/N whined as he slowly pulled out just to push his cock back in again – hitting the area that made her see stars. He chuckled, “your pussy just keeps sucking me back in, sweetheart – it’s like she doesn’t want me to leave.” Y/N responded by babbling incoherently, and he looked up at her only to see tears brimming her eyes from the pure pleasure he so graciously gave, and instinctively kissed them away. “Taking my cock so well, such a good girl,” he said before his mouth reached hers, tongue darting between her parted lips before caressing her tongue with his.
His thrusts started to become more desperate, nearly grinding into her – incidentally rubbing against her clit in the process. She moaned against his mouth, her kisses sloppy against his swollen lips. “So good, ‘Nemi…” she whimpered, allowing herself to get lost in the pleasure and heat that he was providing her. He choked on a moan as he continued to rut into her, the squelching sounds of her pussy driving him nearly insane, “gonna cum, pretty. Where– where do you want it?” he asked, surprised he even had the coherency to form words as his mind was half gone from pleasure.
“Inside,” she whined, and his eyes widened, the building tension in his gut rising. “Are you sure?” he asked, and she nodded, writhing underneath him. 
“Need it inside…please,” she begged him, and who was he to deny her? His thrusts became sloppier, and he let go of one of her hands to reach down and rub her clit. The pleasure was immense, and Y/N couldn’t think about anything but him as she clenched around his cock as her orgasm flooded through her body – which consequently brought Sanemi over the edge as well, as he all but exploded inside of her hot cunt, groaning deeply as his cum flooded into her womb in thick ropes – causing her to moan and babble incoherently. “Fuck! Fuck– Y/N, I fucking love you,” he confessed in his state of euphoria, and Y/N only fully grasped what he said once he had collapsed on top of her – having just enough energy to pull him up towards her lips to kiss him once more – his lips hot and wet and swollen as they pressed against hers. “I love you too, ‘Nemi. So much,” she confessed, and he looked at her, slightly embarrassed by his own impromptu confession, but beyond elated that she felt the same way. 
He slid off of her, his softening cock slipping out of her pussy and he reached his arms around her – wanting nothing more than to hold her close to him as they both lay there on his futon. She smiled lazily in his arms and he kissed her cheek softly. “Not gonna let you go, baby, I swear. I won’t let anything bad happen to you – not anymore,” he said as he gently brushed his rough fingers against her newly formed scar. 
“I know, ‘Nemi. I promise I’m not going anywhere,” she whispered softly, and he smiled, thinking that he’d finally found someone to share himself with – someone whom he could shatter into should he feel like breaking, someone who could piece him back together so he could remain strong for the sake of others.
“I know, I trust you.”
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Oh, how wrong he was.
He swore to himself that he was only parted from her for a second as his pace and heart quickened – traversing through the blood-slicked greenery. Sanemi was plagued by loss – his siblings, his mother, his first love – but the feeling that it would happen yet again never lessened the blow nor the curdling acidity that coursed through his gut. 
He frantically searched each corpse along the battlefield, hoping, praying, that he wouldn’t find her among them. Sanemi never considered himself religious – he would rather not believe in any god than believe that an almighty being could allow such devastation to course through his life – through others' lives. However, while mustering the waning strength of his muscles to keep him from collapsing, he called out to the universe – selfishly pleading with it to allow him to keep even a single shred of happiness within his life, swearing that he would give anything to ensure her safety, to secure her life as part of his own.
But the universe turned its back on him once again, as he saw a glimpse of her hair – but it wasn’t her hair. No, Sanemi knew that her hair shined in the morning sunlight, it was beautiful and soft as he would feel it between his fingers – it was never bloodied like it was now. 
As he rushed over to Y/N, he nearly puked upon setting his eyes on her. There was a deep gash that cut through her torso – one that couldn’t have been caused by anything but the claws of a demon. He could see her entrails spewing out of it, and as his eyes traveled up towards her face, it was obvious that he was far too late. Her eyes – the ones he loved to get lost in, were lifeless; her lips – the ones that were so soft and loving when he kissed her, were parted in what seemed to be remnants of fear from the last moments of her life.
Sanemi couldn’t take it – and, as though pushed by an invisible force, he was knocked down to his knees.
A wretched sob escaped him as he reached towards her, uncaring of the blood and gore that stained his clothing, and he held her close to him. He sobbed out her name, wishing this was some horrible trick – some fucked up nightmare that he was subjected to, but the longer Sanemi held Y/N in his arms, the more he realized that this was real and that he had broken his promise once again – the promise to protect those close to him.
He picked her up and carried her to a clearing away from the battlefield – where a sole willow tree stood, and resolved to bury her there. As he placed Y/N into the ground, Sanemi wished to carve her name amongst the many scars on his body, so that maybe the blood spilled in her honor would somehow tether his soul to hers, so that he may permanently have her in a way that life itself could not provide.
Hours passed, and he finally managed to stand up once more, his heart hardened once again, and it took everything within him to not look back as he walked away from her gravesite. And, despite not wishing to look upon her grave again, Sanemi committed himself to continue living and fighting in her memory as Y/N slowly returned to dust underneath the lone willow.
And so he did — until his very last breath.
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jessfromouterspace · 1 month
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nature of the weave 🌼 chapter one
a rolan/tav story
[this story features a named tav, Mari, I'll be putting together some info for her, she'll be tagged with oc:mari]
ao3 link
The group hadn't even been in the lower city for a week and Mari could not get in enough visits in to Sorcerous Sundries.
She always found some reason to pop in. At first she didn't have to reach, but once they had acquired the tomes Gale needed (and some he didn't) and disposed of Lorroakan, she had to get a little bit more creative.
She had been thrilled to see Rolan thrive once he was free from Lorroakan's abuse. Seeing what had happened to him had almost broken Mari. And Rolan held immense shame at being seen in that condition. It took some time, but she helped him work through those feelings, and those late night talks only made her fall harder for him.
Her friends all knew what pulled her to the magical shop, and most were happy to look the other way and let her find happiness and optimism where she could.
All except for Astarion.
He wasn't upset, not even a little. No, he was simply having a field day teasing Mari about her crush and delighting in the deep shade of pink her cheeks would turn.
“Maybe he'll show you his wand.” Astarion leaned over and whispered in her ear before bursting into laughter at her expression. Before she could stop herself she smacked him on the arm. He drew his arm away in faux outrage. “Careful with the merchandise.” He laughed, rubbing the spot where she hit him.
“If you don't behave yourself in there…” The threat was empty, laughter breaking through before she could finish her thought. “Just… don't embarrass me.” The slightest bit of insecurity creeped out at the thought of Rolan discovering her crush and not reciprocating.
“I would never, darling.” He looped his arm with hers, being able to read his dearest friends' concerns. “He'd be lucky to have you, you know.” He gave her a nudge, pleased at the smile that spread across her face as they made their way down the stone streets.
“He would, wouldn't he?” Her false bravado was back, gathering her confidence before they entered the store.
“I don't suppose the real Rolan is here?” Mari climbs up and leans over the counter, swiping her hand through the projection for effect. For a wood elf, she has quite the presence.
Mari was small, but strong, a talented ranger since adolescence. Her golden hair flowed passed her shoulders, on days where they didn't anticipate combat she'd take a break from the crown of braids she normally wore. She gave a huff, blowing a strand that had fallen in her face out of the way, giving one last swipe to the projection for good measure.
“Stop that, would you.” A slight smile betraying his annoyed tone as he descended the stairs. Her eyes took him in, he wasn’t wearing his usual robes, but a more utilitarian tunic and trousers. “You know you could simply ask like a normal person.” He stopped at the bottom step, leaning against the rail with his arms crossed. “Besides, my spies told me you were here.” He nodded to Cal and Lia, who were working on organizing some scrolls.
The belts and pouches that hung from him hinted that he was doing a bit more practical work today than his usual arcane studies. The look suited him and Mari tried not to be too obvious with her admiration, she suspected she failed from the laugh that came out of Karlach.
Ignoring her companions, Mari bounded over, excited to see her favorite wizard (not that she'd ever say that in front of Gale). “I'm afraid I ran out of misty step scrolls again.” She averted her eyes, ready to be scolded for her overuse.
He gave an exasperated sigh, but produced three more from a crate nearby. As she reached for them he pulled them back, holding them just out of reach.
“You will be responsible with these, won't you?” The sparkle in his golden eyes gave away his amusement. Between his eyes and the scattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks, she was too mesmerized to give a prompt answer. “Well, won't you?” He lowered his gaze to her lips, his eyes settling just a touch too long before looking her back in the eye.
“Ye- yes, of course.” She sputtered out, internally cursing herself for doing that in front of him. No. Worse. For doing that in front of Astarion and Karlach, who are already having a giggle.
“She might, but I won't.” Astarion piped up, snatching the scrolls while they were both distracted. “Don't worry, she'll pay for these.” He said, wandering off with Karlach to find Gale and give Mari and Rolan a moment to themselves.
Mari just laughed and shook her head. “You're a life saver, Rolan.” She let herself close a bit of the distance between them, his hard swallow as she got closer did not go unnoticed. She considered taking a step back, worried she had been too comfortable. Though there was something about him that always put her at ease, it certainly wasn't his usual demeanor, but he had come a long way from when they first met at the grove.
“How are -” She started, before Rolan cut her off, like he couldn't stop himself from speaking.
“I made you something.” There was an edge of nervousness to his voice as he shoved his hands in his pockets, rifling around for something specific.
“Me? You made me something?” Her eyes were wide, a thousand emotions swirling within her that someone, that he, had made her something.
“If you don't want it, that's okay, I just, seemed like, maybe, you could, I…” Words were flying out of his mouth as he produced a small pouch. “I'm sorry, I don't know.” A flush was spreading across his cheeks, as his flustered speech came to a conclusion.
She reached out and placed her hand on top of his before she could stop herself, the warmth from his skin melting into hers.
“Sorry.” She muttered, pulling her hand back to herself. “May I see it?” She asked, letting herself move a bit closer, mere inches between them now.
“Of course, I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me.” The blush on his cheeks was a deep red now.
“Probably just the same thing that's wrong with me.” She took a risk and decided to be bold, his eyes meeting hers and they both relaxed a bit, their smiles finding each other.
He pulls a golden chain out of the pouch, attached to the end is an opalescent stone that casts the faintest golden glow. It reminds her of his eyes, and she isn't sure whether that was intentional or not.
“It's beautiful.” She is in awe as he twirls it around for her to see. “I don't know what to say, thank you.” She reaches her hand out, but he doesn't let her have it just yet.
“It has two different types of magic working at all times. A protection spell to ward off any ill intended magic. It will also let you cast mage armor as needed.” He held the stone portion up so she could get a closer look. “While this looks fragile, it cannot break. Well, much like you, I suppose.” He undid the clasp on the chain, missing the tears welling in her eyes as she watched him talk about his magic and craftsmanship. “Would you like to wear it around your neck or wrapped around your wrist?” He asked, now catching the way she looked at him, with nothing short of love plastered across her face.
“My wrist, if you don't mind, I can admire it that way.” Her voice was much softer than it normally is as she held out her left wrist, pushing her sleeve back. He took his time getting the chain wrapped and clasped so that it wouldn't tangle. As he finished he let his thumb rub a lazy circle on the inside of her wrist while his other hand cupped her fingers gently.
“I feel better already.” He said, unwilling to let go of her hand, even as she tilted her head, an inquisitive look on her face. “I worry about you.” He shrugged, like the answer should be obvious. “Now I can help protect you even when I'm not around.” His thumb stilled upon her wrist. “Not that you need it.” A nervous laugh escaped his lips, afraid he had perhaps crossed a line or insulted her in some way.
She pulled her hand from his and for the briefest moment his heart was in his throat, until she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace.
“I do need it.” Her voice was soft in his ear as he let his arms encircle her, now very aware of how small she was. “I need you.” Her voice was barely a whisper, but he had heard it, and he didn't trust the words that might come out of his mouth. Instead, he let his lips lightly press against her forehead while he held her close.
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sleepyowlwrites · 8 months
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Your writing is very lovely and relaxing, so could it be possible to share a soft and fluffy snippet? I hope you'll have a great day and thanks for sharing your creativity♥️
I'm on my phone so here's what is readily available to me. This is from Youth Story, pretty early in draft zero, when Evie had a different personality and Bell actually showed up.
The ground was hard, as it was wont to be after a frost, and the grass all stood at attention with their tips grayish-white. Nyks stepped on them reverently at first, but the wonder wore off after only a minute and then it was just cold and the slight crunch under his boots didn’t really make him smile anymore. But then, most things made him cold when he was alone. He walked faster when he caught sight of Bell and Evie waiting for him under an overhang.
As soon as he was within range, he was stretching his hands out to receive theirs in his. They gave them immediately, expressions unchanged except for the slight amount of affection that always tinted their mouths whenever Nyks was being both physically and verbally affectionate. He threw out any reservations about it being too early for this and instead threw himself into Evie’s arms, snaking both of his around her shoulders and leaning down to sink his chin into her hair. It smelled like coffee and lavender, which was so Evie.
“Are you cold, baby?” Evie said, her arms encircling him loose enough to give him space, but he just pressed himself closer into her.
“Yes,” he said back, not caring about either the pet name or the insinuation. Maybe he was a baby for being cold when the leaves still hadn’t finished falling, but the grass was frozen so whatever. “I need lots of hugs to warm me up.”
“Okay,” Evie said through laughter, the softer version of her usual, that reverberated along her spine and shook them both. “We can give you those.”
Bell tapped his shoulder after a minute and Evie carefully transfered Nyks over to her, which was a little awkward since Bell was taller than Evie and they had to rearrange their arms, but she was still warm and that was the most important part. Part of Nyks knew that the warmth emanated more from their joint delight at being in each other’s presence than from actual physical body heat. It was a special kind of warmth and Nyks reveled in it.
“This feels like love,” he said after a bit of silence.
Evie laughed again, louder and sweeter. “That’s because it is, you silly. We’re loving you all the time. Naturally you’d feel it more when we’re pressed up against each other.”
“We love you, Nyks.” Bell’s voice drifted to him through misty air tinged with sage and charcoal. Her voice always sounded smoky and clean to him.
“I love you, too.” He pulled away just long enough to bring Evie in so that they were a friendship wreath, breathing out heat into the October chill. “I’ll love you forever.”
Thank you, sweetpea.
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happyheidi · 3 years
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minaslittleone · 3 years
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The Sarahs as plant mums (AHS & Ratched)
Like many people I've become an avid plant mum over the course of the pandemic (much to the chagrin of those in my life who have to hear every time one of my babies sprouts a new leaf), which got me thinking - what kind of plant mum would each of the Sarahs be?
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Billie-Dean Howard
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Billie-Dean is much more partial to flowers than she is to caring for a whole plant. She is definitely the kind of person who always has fresh flowers in her home but also takes the time to trim and rearrange the bouquet as she places it in a vase, rather than merely unceremoniously compacting the existing arrangement into a vessel. She also definitely has a secret cut flower food recipe (passed down to her by the ghost of a Victorian housekeeper whom she met while filming a special of her show at a mansion in the UK) which keeps her cut flowers looking immaculate for a full week. If her schedule permits it, her favourite thing to do on a Sunday morning is to stroll the farmers markets and choose individual types of flowers and foliage to bring home and arrange herself from scratch. She finds the process of trimming each of the stems and finding the perfect position for each individual bloom incredibly cathartic.
Her favourite flowers are bright and cheerful. She is particularly drawn to things like tulips, gerberas and lillies, but finds softer more delicate blooms like carnations frustrating and overly dramatic, she definitely appreciates a bit of tenacity in her flowers. She also has no time for strongly scented blooms, and particularly despises the way roses seem to emit a sickly sweet odor after only a few days. Billie finds scents and perfumes in general to be quite cloying and overwhelming as smell is one of the ways she is often viscerally affected when she makes contact with ghosts. She unfortunately associates most strong smells with encounters and so sweet smelling blooms hold little appeal to her, she much prefers fresh neutral scents. The one exception is lavender which she does find soothing. After a particularly taxing week it is not uncommon for her usual bright cheerful blooms to be replaced by simple posies of lavender and rosemary as she recenters herself.
Lana Winters
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Lana is undoubtedly a plant serial killer. Which is totally unsurprising since whenever she gets fixated on a new story she often forgets to feed herself, let alone feed and water her plants. That doesn't mean she doesn't appreciate them though. She loves the way little office plants bring life and vitality to her workspace, that is until they inevitably whither and die from lack of water, or from being burried under piles of paper but that doesn't stop her trying.
Eventually Lana discovers that she and succulents are well suited. It actually makes a lot of sense when she thinks about it - they're both a little prickly on the outside (but only to protect the softness underneath) and both are stubborn to a fault. Lana is particularly fond of the slightly larger cactus she keeps on her desk (which is incidentally the first plant she managed not to kill) and often finds herself talking to him to help work through the flow of her ideas or to overcome writer's block. Spike (as she creatively named him) really is a very good listener and a talented editor to boot.
Still there are times when Lana wishes she had a greener thumb and could expand her collection beyond succulents. As much as she loves Spike and his prickly friends, she really wishes they would grow just a bit quicker so she could experience that new leaf joy even just once. She completely dissuades herself of those feelings though when she returns from a week long book tour to find a weird bump on the top of Spike. Her first thought is that after all this time she's finally managed to kill him and that she really is as terrible a plant parent as she had feared. However, those fears completely dissolved the following morning when she returned to her office to find that Spike's bump had begun to open into the beginnings of a beautiful pink flower. For a minute she could only stare on disbelief, not quite comprehending what was going on however, that quickly gave way to a giddy childlike grin when she realised that she must be doing something right. That, and her little man really did look very cute with his flower top hat.
Cordelia Goode
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Cordelia doesn't just have a green thumb, she has ten green fingers. She absolutely adores plants and having living things around her, especially since the greenhouse has always been her place of peace and sanctuary. She finds it incredibly cathartic pottering around the greenhouse when she gets a few spare moments away from all her duties as supreme/headmistress/mother to a house full of girls. Most of the plants she keeps in the greenhouse are solely for practical/ medicinal purposes but she does keep a few plants in her room and office which she finds soothing. She is particularly fond of philodendrons and pothos with their easy going nature and relaxed growth pattern. She loves the way they seem to make themselves at home anywhere and every time she spots new leaves unfurling it makes her smile. She tries to make an effort to see the beauty in their imperfections and use them to remind herself that everything doesn't always have to be perfect.
Since her supremacy the plants in her personal spaces have thrived unlike anything anyone has ever seen, seemingly feeding off Cordelia's magical aura. Any time any of the plants in the greenhouse are waning she will take them to her office for a few days of rehabilitation after which they will always be positively bursting with life. It is not uncommon for her to find new additions appearing in her little infirmary if Mallory or Misty have noticed that a particular plant is in need of a little TLC.
The flip side to this is that any time Cordelia over taxes herself, while she may be an expert at schooling her features and hiding it from her girls, it will show in her plants. After too many late nights dealing with running the academy or too many days spent funneling all of her energy into everyone around her (and subsequently completely neglecting herself) the plants in her office (and room) will start to lose their vibrancy as well. The first victim is usually the heartleaf philodendron on Cordelia's office bookshelf (the first plant she allowed herself to bring into the space after ascending to the supremacy) which seems to be particularly attune to her moods, especially when it is feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy sapping her magic. Conversely it's the monstera deliciosa in the corner of her office that seems to be the first to wilt when its physical stress or exhaustion plaguing the supreme. Zoe now automatically takes stock of the plants in Cordelia's office every time she enters, knowing it's the only true indication she's likely to get that the supreme herself might be in need of some TLC.
Bette and Dot Tattler
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Bette has always been drawn to flowers, she thinks they're terribly romantic. From bouquets of flowers from gentleman callers to sweet cottage gardens behind white picket fences, teeming with blooms of assorted colours, Bette thinks flowers are a beautiful symbol of normality. She desperately wants to have a garden or even a window box that she can tend to, however that particular desire is not entirely compatible with living in a trailer.
What she does have though is a small collection of African Violets sitting on their kitchen windowsill. They were a present from Jimmy after Bette's first performance singing in the freakshow. Though she might be completely tone deaf she is fiercely determined, so after months of practice she had finally managed to learn "dream a little dream of me" enough to hold the tune (with Dot gently humming it alongside her to keep her in pitch). A few days before Bette was due to perform Jimmy had quietly pressed a note into Dot's palm after dinner asking which type of flowers Bette preferred so that he could get her a bouquet for her first performance. Dot's heart warmed at that, seeing the man that she loved so tenderly care for her sister. Later that evening she had pressed a note back in reply that Bette loved anything pink, cheerful and romantic, however she also ached for flowers the she could keep beyond the length of time a bouquet would last. So maybe a flowering plant would be better. Jimmy of course bought both, handing Bette a beautiful posie of assorted pink coloured carnations along with a terracotta pot of African Violets. Bette had thrown her arm around Jimmy's neck and squeeled with excitement at the sight of her flowers while Dot had offered him the warmest, proudest smile as she mouthed "thank you" against the backdrop of her sister's excited ramblings.
Given how long Bette had pined for flowers and how excited she had been to receive them it is unsurprising that she is a devoted plant parent. She waters her flowers once a week like clockwork, adding water to a saucer underneath the pot and letting them drink the water up through their roots just like Paul had shown her. Apparently African Violets don't like to get their leaves wet. Bette would even go as far as to take her flowers out for some sun if she felt the conditions on their windowsill weren't right at their current campsite. Her little pot of flowers really did bring her so much joy.
Dot may not have shared her sister's passion for flowers (finding them mostly to be needless and frivolous) but in the end she was the one who responsible for the expansion of her sister's flower garden. When Paul had originally shown Bette how to care for her flowers he had also mentioned that they could be propagated which had fascinated Dot. The idea you could just take a leaf and it would grow roots and become a completely new plant was amazing to her. But convincing Bette to let her try it out for herself definitely proved to be battle. Bette certainly wasn't keen on allowing her sister to chop into her precious flowers while Dot couldn't see why her sister was being so protective, the little plant certainly had plenty of leaves to spare, especially if it could give a whole new plant. Unsurprisingly the disagreement escalated to a pair of very raised voices which is what ultimately drew Jimmy into the argument. After managing to calm down both sisters Jimmy revealed to Bette that the tiny pot plant had originally been her sister's idea because she knew how much she wanted to have flowers of her own. Dot confirmed that she does know how important the flowers are to Bette and that she would never want to hurt them, she was just excited at the possibility of being to make more of them for her sister and be able to give her the windowsill full of flowers that she had always dreamed of. Bette couldn't help but relent after that. A few months later and Dot has become quite the propagation expert, to the point where their windowsill is beggining to fill up with juvenile plants as well as fresh cuttings just beginning to take root. Bette smiles every time they catch her eye, not just at the beauty of the flowers that she spent so long pining for but also for how they symbolise her sister's love for her. While they may still bicker bitterly from time to time, Bette knows that no one will ever love her as much or as fiercely as her sister does. Dot still has no real interest in the flowers themselves. She does still find propagating rewarding, especially watching her little babies start to grow and flourish. But mostly she just enjoys watching the way they make her sister smile.
Sally McKenna
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Sally is obsessed with carnivorous plants and you can't convince me otherwise. She definitely discovered them on Instagram and loves all the funny shapes and crazy colours that they come in. Sally would never be content with a plant that looks like a plant - no her plants need to look like vicious little aliens. The fact that they're natural born killers is also a nice little bonus. She loves how they subvert the natural order of things - insects should eat plants not the other way around.
When she first discovered plants online Sally got really upset that she'd never be able to go out and buy any of her own. It was Iris who mentioned that maybe she would be able to order some online - big mistake. Sally is nothing if not obsessive and her room now rivals Poison Ivy's lair with the number of plants she has crammed in there. The sheer number of babies in her collection doesn't mean that she neglects them though, no Sally is absolutely an A level obsessive plant mum - only the best for her babies. When she discovered that carnivorous plants prefer distilled water to tap water she started ordering it by the gallon, and as the best lit positions in her room started to fill up she definitely ordered grow lights so that none of her babies suffer. The grow lights also give off a slight purple glow which makes her room look like a rave which is absolutely a feature and not a bug.
Sally has also been known to go hunting for food for her babies, especially since her collection has grown and she worries there isn't enough to go around. Iris and Liz frequently find her collecting dead flies from window ledges to take back to her growing brood. She offers them to her babies with tweezers as a mother bird would to her chicks. The last time Iris had an exterminator spray the Cortez Sally accused her of trying to murder her babies with poison and absolutely ordered fruit flies online (intended for feeding pet reptiles rather than pet plants but meh) to keep her collection going until she could be absolutely sure that the offending toxins had dissipated.
It goes without saying that Sally has a separate plant Instagram account which she updates on nearly a daily basis with photos of new growth or just progress on her collection. She definitely has a great eye for plant photography and for making her babies come to life on the screen. One of her favourite things to do is film feeding videos with her largest Venus Flytrap "Fang" (who incidentally has his own Instagram account: @Fangstagram). Watching plants move so quickly will never get old to Sally and she has definitely been known to tease some of her smaller flytraps into snapping shut just for her enjoyment. She tries not tease them too much though, they are her babies after all.
Audrey Tindall
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Like Lana, Audrey is another serial plant killer, but for complete different reasons. Audrey, bless her, kills her plants with far too much kindness (and water). She so desperately wants a house full of the beautiful lush plants she sees all over Instagram so she tries her darnedest to be the best plant parent ever. Her problem is that every time she sees leaves starting to yellow or wilt she assumes it must be from lack of water (rather than the fact that their roots are already rotting from far too much).
Initially she fell into the trap of picking up plants she thought looked cute on Instagram or in the garden centre, without really knowing much about caring for them. Needless to say this didn't end well (multiple times). She thought she had cracked it when discovered the subset of house plants refered to as "hard to kill". Unfortunately, most of those plants are very resistant to neglect but not to Audrey's smothering type of plant parenting. Finally she discovered peace lillies which do actually like to have wet feet and appreciate all of her affection. She's slowly collecting other spathiphyllums in all shapes and sizes now that she's feels confident she's got the hang of them. She gets so excited every time one of them grows a new leaf or flowers - such a proud plant mum.
Now that she's growing a little more confident with at least a subset of house plants she will occasionally post photos to her Instagram. She's still pretty insecure about her plant parent abilities though and it doesn't help that she will occasionally get haters telling her she's doing it all completely wrong. She tries not to let them get to her but sometimes they really do get her down - all she wanted to do was share the joy that her plant babies bring her and she's doing her best to do right by them. After one particularly brutal bout of trolling it's actually Sally who defends her. Audrey has been following Sally's plantstagram since she first started getting interested in plants so the fact that Sally even acknowledged her kinda blows her mind. Sally tells people in no uncertain terms to back off Audrey or she will set her carnivorous babies on them. The two strike up a fast friendship after this and through Sally's guidance Audrey eventually begins to grow more confident as a plant mum. For her birthday Sally definitely sends Audrey her first baby Venus Flytrap with the absolute insistence that it be named "Audrey II".
Ally Mayfair-Richards
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Ally has never really seen the appeal of house plants nor does she have the time (or the headspace) to look after them. She does however have a fully stocked herb garden growing in window boxes in the kitchen to have everything within easy reach for cooking. She also loves the fresh clean smell of the basil and rosemary wafting through the house on the breeze if she leaves the windows open, particularly if it has rained. She may even admit that she's beginning to see the appeal of having the greenery around the place from an aesthetic standpoint as well.
Given how busy Ally is juggling being a senator, running a restaurant and being a single mum (plus whatever wink wink nudge nudge cult stuff she's up to on the side) it's not really surprising that it's Ozzie who's taken to caring for the herb garden most of the time. He's always been such an inquisitive kid and Ally loves watching the way his face lights up over simple things like flowers and new growth. Ozzie is particularly obsessed with propagation and there is always at least a handfull of his experiments on the windowsill. Whether it's an avocado seed he's trying to get to sprout or basil cuttings he's trying to root, he always has some new scheme in the works. Ally usually just smiles and ruffles his hair (so proud and glad that she has such an amazing and we'll rounded kid after everything that he's been through). As long as he leaves her enough basil to make pesto with, she's happy for him to play to his heart's content.
Wilhemina Venable
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Plants have never been of any interest to Wilhemina, she considers them to be unnecessary sources of dirt and clutter. They serve no practical purpose so she has no time for them. At least until she becomes the somewhat unwilling recipient of one. As far as office secret Santa presents go, she supposes, the lilac coloured orchid is actually quite inoffensive. However she can't shake the feeling that it must have been bought for her as some kind of challenge, that someone at Kineros is secretly watching to see how quickly she will kill it because someone like the imperious Ms Venable is obviously incapable of the kindness or tenderness necessary to keep something as beautiful and delicate as an orchid. What she doesn't know is that it was actually from Mutt, because while he is usually too coked out of his mind to show it, he is actually quite fond of her. And he knows her well enough to know that she would never accept a gift from him directly so each Christmas he rigs the office Secret Santa to get her name so he can her something (and also partly because he doesn't trust some of the interns not to get her something crude on a dare given the anonymous nature of the gift). He also knows her well enough to realise that she would appreciate the elegant beauty (and obviously the colour) of the orchid but would never cede to the frivolity of buying something like it for herself.
Despite the good intentions of the gift, Wilhemina can not fathom the idea that it was genuinely meant for her enjoyment. Obviously someone is toying with her but she will not be beaten. Wilhemina Venable may not know the first thing about orchids but she will be damned if whoever gave her the wretched thing manages to get a laugh out of it at her expense. So she learns. Mina is nothing if not fiercely independent and resourceful so she scours the internet for information on orchid care and reads everything she can find. And of course she succeeds (because anything else would be unacceptable to her).
After six months her little orchid is still alive and thriving in her office and privately she would have to admit that she has grown quite attached to it. Compared to other plants she finds it to be quite neat and tidy, and there is something elegant and refined about its arching growth habit which she finds quite beautiful. Over the course of her research she has of course come across the tremendous variety of orchids available. She of course is drawn to all of the different tones of purple blooms but also finds herself unexpectedly drawn to some of the darker, more gothic varieties. She tries to tell herself that it is merely an aesthetic appreciation, that they hold no actual allure to her, but she keeps finding herself drawn back to them. She almost buys herself one on *so many* occasions but the idea of doing something so frivolous just for her own pleasure and enjoyment is so terrifying to her that she always chickens out. Eventually she caves though, buying an indigo coloured orchid on sale at the grocery store, abruptly rushing home with it before she can change her mind again. She spends the entire rest of the day second guessing the decision but the next morning when she opens her eyes to the delicate purple blooms tenderly placed on her night stand she can't help the gentle smile it brings to her face or the warmth that settles in her chest.
After that her collection slowly grows. She still struggles with buying things for herself simply for pleasure but she is getting better, and the sick guilty feeling in the pit of her stomach seems to appear less and less each time she does it. So her collection of orchids grows, mostly including those with particularly dark blooms or interesting and unusual shapes (though there are definitely a couple of lilac and lavender coloured blooms in there as well). She also begins to expand to other dark leaved plants as well, like certain begonias and definitely a ZZ raven. Like with the orchids, all of her new acquisitions are thoroughly researched and she is determined to succeed in their care.
Mutt will sometimes catch her glance fondly at her little desk orchid as he passes her office. He is genuinely glad to have given her something that seems to bring her such contentment. If only he knew the true extent of the gift he had given her.
Mildred Ratched
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Image: bidoctor
Mildred has no idea about plants of any kind. Or at least she didn't before Gwen. Her childhood certainly wasn't filled with simple pleasures like planting flowers or playing in a vegetable patch, and any indoor plants or flower arrangements were merely things she was forbidden to touch and harshly punished if she damaged. So inevitably these things inspired a far greater degree of anxiety and tension in Mildred than they did joy or contentment.
But Gwen loves gardening. She had memories as a young child of helping her father in their backyard, returning of an evening covered in mud, much to her mother's dismay. Gwen's strong nurturing nature made her a very capable gardener and she derived a great sense of contentment from it. On some level Mildred wished she could help Gwen as she pottered through their garden of a weekend but she wouldn't have a clue where to start. In fact, the nasty voice in Mildred's head whispered, she would be so much better off without you, you'll just ruin everything, you're far too useless to be of any help. So as Gwen worked Mildred would watch, pretending to pay attention to her novel but really trying to find the pattern and reason to Gwen's actions so that maybe, someday, she wouldn't be quite so useless.
Mildred did, however, enjoy accompanying Gwen to the nursery when she went to collect supplies for their garden. Mildred may not have the faintest idea what any of the plants were called or how to care for them but she did find it peaceful to walk through the rows upon rows of different shades of green. She was continually fascinated by how many different shapes, sizes and colours they seemed to come in. Sometimes Gwen would catch her staring curiously at a particular plant but Mildred would always decline when Gwen offered that they could take it home with them.
One particular Saturday in spring Gwen found Mildred tenderly righting a small yellow marigold which had been knocked over by other nursery-goers as they riffled through the display to choose the brightest and most beautiful blooms. The poor little plant was somewhat lopsided and some of its leaves were slightly crushed from where it had lain, still there were the beginnings of golden yellow petals starting to peak from within the confines of its buds. Gwen watched as Mildred delicately unkinked the worst of the damaged leaves, fingers ghosting over the flowers that had yet to bloom. This time when Gwen suggested that they take the battered little plant home with them Mildred suddenly became very interested in a thread dangling from the cuff of her blouse as she muttered "Wouldn't it be easier to just choose one that isn't crushed? One without so much damage?". Gwen gently reached out, linking her pinkie with Mildred's, cursing that anything more would have been unacceptable in public. She gently squeezed Mildred's slender finger in her own until her gaze lifted to meet Gwendolyn's. "Never" she breathed. "The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all". She felt her throat tighten and eyes begin to burn as she watched Mildred's eyes begin to glisten and that *damn* dimple on her chin begin to quiver. "I wouldn't have the faintest idea of how to look after it", Mildred's gaze dropping again to the poor bruised little plant. Gwen squeezed their intertwined fingers once more, coaxing Mildred's eyes to meet her own. "I can show you, if you'd like?" Mildred's teeth began to worry her bottom lip as she considered. "What if I can't? What if I kill it?" "Sweetheart, you won't and I'll be there with you every step of the way. We can do it together." Mildred seemed to consider this offer, turning back to gaze tenderly at their little friend, before meeting Gwen's eyes. "Ok" she murmured, "together".
After that, every time Mildred and Gwen returned to the nursery Mildred would inevitably leave with a battered looking plant that she was determined to rehabilitate. Gwen, true to her word, patiently guided Mildred through the basics of plant care and Mildred, unsurprisingly, quickly became very proficient. Her tiny, dextrous fingers, used to dealing with needles and surgical instruments, were incredibly adept at staking and repositioning bent and battered plants as she helped them to heal. Soon enough, one end of their porch became entirely dedicated to Mildred's patients, so much so that Gwen began affectionately referring to it as Mildred's ward. And in spite of her initial fears Mildred had become quite the proficient gardener, with her little rag-tag bunch of plants, all twisted and pointing in slightly odd directions, forming the most beautiful and beloved garden Gwendolyn had ever seen.
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struwwelzeter · 3 years
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I’m surprised yet I’m not surprised that I haven’t seen anyone on tumblr talk about the Balenciaga collab. Twitter and Instagram are almost universally panning the move and are quite pissed off at it. Personally I think the collab was a dumb and tone deaf move on the management, but I can’t fuss about it too much because of a lot previous musicians I liked ate these kinds of designer streetwear brands up and I just had to turn a blind eye to it eventually.
😕 I was really happy tumblr largely ignored it because I expected the outrage and dreaded it. My take is not gonna be a popular one, and I am sorry it’s probably not what you hoped to get. I’ll try to explain why, but I do have big feelings about this and I don’t know how articulate i can be.
The thing I am seeing in all of these comments, and what I think you refer to when you say it was tone deaf, is a lot of hurt. And in a way I completely, 100% understand that. The problem is, I think, that it’s misdirected when it is directed at the band. The fact that some well off fashion victim can drop what some of us earn in a month on a hoodie, hurts. It hurts that people that have been with this band for years and years, have saved any and each magazine clipping they can get their hands on and struggle to save up for months to buy a concert ticket while other people can do that - that shit hurts. And I understand that. I really do. I feel it too.
The thing is though, and this is where I fear what I say could be taken the wrong way: Rammstein doesn’t owe anyone anything. They don’t owe anyone to stick with only accessible merch, they don’t owe us some weird class loyalty where they turn stuff like this down. They just don’t. Why would they? Why? Because the thing that is hurtful about it is systemic, and they don’t owe us to fix systemic unfairness. They don’t owe anyone to not take advantage of it either, when it is offered to them, because they aren’t exploiting anyone but the exploiters, if that makes sense. They just don’t. Sorry. They are a well off band, but they aren’t rich enough to fix capitalism. I am gonna ask you very honestly, would you say no to becoming successful in a system that by it’s very nature devalues what you do, makes it a huge lottery draw if you can even make a living of what you do and takes advantage of you wherever it can? Rammstein got very lucky, and worked very hard for longer than most people on this website are alive. But in general, the way this society treats people like them, yes, even a large potion of their fan base, is a disgrace. They are a 1 in I don’t know how many cases of people who took the same risks and had the same passion and didn’t make it. And I think they know that too. I am sorry, but they’ve earned it.
I grew up far below what is considered the poverty line in my country, in a community of artists, and I feel very strongly about this one thing: The same person that will drop a 6 figure number on a painting will tell you not to go to art school and get a real job instead, because you can never be “successful” that way (whatever they mean by that.) Please read that sentence again.
Society doesn’t give a shit about artists. And when I mean “society” I actually mean fans, too, because ... I could write an essay about this, but basically because they complain more about not getting a ticket refund than the fact that currently thousands of artists fall by the wayside and won’t make it through this pandemic. I repeat, society, AT large, don’t give a wet fart about artists. It pretends it does, because they want to look cultured, but it really doesn’t. Every now and then they lift one up into the heights of the glittery temples of fame and stardom, to circle jerk with their art criticism and their champagne events and photo ops. And it’s disgusting it works that way, yes. But again, that is systemic. And what I need you to understand is that the majority of people who turn to the extremely precarious lifestyle of trying to paint or to make music for a living, take up with how the world is treating them, take the risk of falling of the grod financially, take the degradation of being asked to “work for exposure” and the “why are you still doing this, wouldn’t it be easier to —— it’s clearly not going anywhere” questions year after year after year for ... they do it for that one tine little chance to be that 1 that gets lifted. This isn’t about the passion — you don’t make art to be “successful”, there are so much easier ways. It’s about taking the merciless grind and maltreatment for that one shot to one day be seen and recognised as worthy people and to get out of the grind. And when it happens, they are supposed to turn it down? Why?
Sorry, but no.
I understand that this is an inflammatory take. I do, in a way, understand why people get angry. I just don’t agree with the direction of the anger - at all. The thing is, if you look at it in a more innocent way, the creative director of Balenciaga, as I understand it, was a civil war refugee who somehow managed to become the leading designer on one of the biggest name in fashion. Do you think it was likely for him to get there? Do you think it was ever easy for any boy to become a fashion designer against a backdrop of constant teasing and a probably even smaller chance of “making it” than musicians? But he did it, and turns out he is a Rammstein fan. So he does what he loves. Big deal. To be clear: I think the existence of brands like Balenciaga is stupid to me too. But still - the same person that will drop a 1000€ bucks on a raincoat will tell you not to go to fashion school, you know? Rammstein also have a history of being in the high fashion world. They had 3 exclusive photoshoots with zoo magazine in the time they had like, idk, 1? With Rolling Stone, they were in fashion magazines first in the US, they had runway shows in their early career ... this was a long time coming. I WAS surprised it was Balenciaga. I hoped it would be something like Givenchy or McQueen but I guess they’re not that classy - what do you expect from a bunch of guys who wear sandals with tracksuits.
Another take I see quite often is the whole “well now there will be knock offs and people that don’t even know the band will start wearing it” and while that is a huge pet peeve, I have to think of Flake writing about that in his book and being all awed by how anyone could become that big - and just feeling a but of a misty eyed satisfaction of “they made it.”
I understand people are angry. But maybe consider of you’re really angry at the band - or simply the fact that we live in a world where some people have to make a living for weeks off the same money someone else drops on a t-shirt.
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animebw · 3 years
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Short Reflection: Pokemon Heroes
The best of the Pokemon movies are the ones that actually have something to say. Beyond the greatly improved animation quality and the grand scale of the stories, what sets the movies from the TV show is their willingness to use the concept of Pokemon themselves to explore big ideas and distill complex emotional drama down to a level that kids can connect with. Mewtwo Strikes Back was practically Baby’s First Philosophy Class, tackling nature vs nurture and the existential terror of being through a cloned psychic cat going on a rampage. Spell of the Unown used a literal living alphabet to tell a tale about the paralyzing nature of grief, and how we can’t disconnect from the world even when it hurts us. At their best, the Pokemon movies aren’t just entertaining, but also meaningful. Pokemon Heroes doesn’t really fall into that camp, though. It doesn’t have a powerful theme it’s exploring, no real big ideas beyond telling an episodic adventure on a grand scale. What it does have, thankfully, is masterful attention to detail. This isn’t the best Pokemon movie, but it’s definitely one of the best thought out, and that makes it more than entertaining enough to make up for its relative lack of depth.
The story takes place in the island city of Altomare, which is very obviously inspired by Venice with its Renaissance architecture and canal streets. Ash and his friends are having a nice, fun vacation in this wonderful tourist spot, but little do they know, they’re about to be roped into yet more earthshaking events. You see, this city’s patron “gods,” as it were, are the legendary Pokemon Latios and Latais, brother and sister flying beasts who saved Altomare long ago by creatings its canal system. It’s said they keep watch over the city to this day, waiting for when their power is needed to save everyone all over again. And trouble comes knocking in the form of Annie and Oakley, an elite duo of Team Rocket agents. They’re here to track down Latais and Latios, capture them, and steal the sacred jewel that protects the city’s canals. Soon enough, Ash and Pikachu are caught up in this mess, and it’s a race against the clock to stop Annie and Oakley before their greed ends up destroying the town... and the Pokemon protecting it.
Like I said, not the most creative plot in the world. There’s good Pokemon, bad Pokemon thieves, and a suitably apocalyptic fate in store should the bad folks get their way. You can predict where this movie’s going pretty easily, and there’s nothing in the way of deeper meaning to enhance the drama and make it feel personal or specific. It also shortchanges a lot of the main cast; Misty, Brock, and Team Rocket basically do nothing but sit on the sidelines all movie and pop in every once in a while to remind the audience they exist, never really interacting with the rest of the cast. So why is it still entertaining? Because it feels like the writing and animation teams went over the entire script with a fine-toothed comb, and at every step of the way they asked themselves, “What’s the most interesting way we could handle this moment?” It’s like they took all the creativity out of the main plot and spread it all around the entire rest of the movie, delivering on a series of moments and bite-sized ideas that crackle with wit and imagination even while the plot fails to connect. I couldn’t give less of a shit about the story, but I wanted to keep watching just to see what unique, imaginative thing would pop up next.
And that’s always been the core of Pokemon’s appeal, hasn’t it? More than story or battles or any of the characters (well, expect Team Rocket), Pokemon’s strength as an anime has been in exploring all the unique little corners of the Pokemon world, showing us all the neat concepts and enjoyable diversions it can come up with. And Pokemon Heroes is the most direct translation of that ethos to the movie side of things yet. We’ve got a fantastic location in the city of Altomare itself, which is positively bursting with character and history. We’ve got some of the best-characterized non-speaking Pokemon yet in Latios and Latias, both of whom have very unique interactions with each other and the human cast. We’ve got some very enjoyable villains in Annie and Oakley, all the prickly banter of our favorite trio of losers with the skills to actually pose a legitimate threat. And I appreciate that this movie is willing to let things play out wordlessly on occasion. There’s an artsy prologue detailing the foundation of Altomare that goes by with zero dialogue or narration, just letting the visuals communicate the story. And Latias and Latois themselves have a couple of conversations that aren’t translated into humanspeak for us: we can just understand what they’re saying through tone and body language. It’s got a surprising amount of trust in its audience, considering it’s, well, a Pokemon movie. Plus, the animation is still as impressive as ever, and this movie probably has the best CG integration of any Pokemon movie up until this point. There are some great tracking shots that make use of CG backgrounds for dynamic camera effects, and the 2D elements composite onto them so seamlessly you rarely notice anything out of place. Considering this movie’s from 2002, that’s really impressive stuff.
And it’s that kind of effort that makes Pokemon Heroes a worthwhile watch. it’s nowhere near the best Pokemon movie, but it’s sure as hell fun, and it’s clear the creators really cared about making it the best version of itself it could be. For that, I give it a score of:
6.5/10
And that really is the end of Pokemon for now. Thank you all for sticking with me, and I’ll see you next time when we start Legend of the Galactic Heroes!
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17/22 The World
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In Game
The World lies at the end of The Fool’s long and winding journey. Wiser and more world-weary than he started out, the Fool faces a moment of reckoning. Some of us accept where our journey has led us to, while others embark on a new challenge. One thing in this World is certain – you can’t have it all.
Location
The World is found on a balcony at Misty's workplace in Little China.
In Tarot
UPRIGHT: Completion, integration, accomplishment, travel
REVERSED: Seeking personal closure, short-cuts, delays
The World card shows a naked woman wrapped in a purple cloth, dancing inside a large laurel wreath. She looks behind her to the past, while her body moves forward to the future. In her hands are two wands or batons, like the one the Magician holds. It is a symbol that what was manifested with the Magician has now come to completion with the World. The wreath is circular, symbolising a continual cycle of successful completion and new beginnings because, as the woman steps through the wreath, she is completing one phase but beginning another one almost straight away.
Around the wreath are four figures (a lion, bull, cherub and eagle), similar to those in the Wheel of Fortune. Both the World and the Wheel of Fortune speak to the cyclical nature of your life and your progression through its cycles. The four figures represent the four fixed signs of the Zodiac—Leo, Taurus, Aquarius, and Scorpio. They are symbolic of the four elements, the four suits of the Tarot, four compass points, four seasons, and the four corners of the Universe. They are here to guide you from one phase to the next, bringing balance and harmony to your journey.
Upright
When the World card appears in a Tarot reading, you are glowing with a sense of wholeness, achievement, fulfilment and completion. A long-term project, period of study, relationship or career has come full circle, and you are now revelling in the sense of closure and accomplishment. This card could represent graduation, a marriage, the birth of a child or achieving a long-held dream or aspiration. You have finally accomplished your goal or purpose. Everything has come together, and you are in the right place, doing the right thing, achieving what you have envisioned. You feel whole and complete.
Now, the World card invites you to reflect on your journey, honour your achievements and tune into your spiritual lessons. Celebrate your successes and bask in the joy of having brought your goals to fruition. All the triumphs and tribulations along your path have made you into the strong, wise, more experienced person you are now. Express gratitude for what you have created and harvested. Finally, make sure you don’t rush into the next big project; celebrating your journey will set you up for success when you are ready for your next challenge.
If you have not quite reached this point of completion, then you are very close! You may still need an added level of understanding to graduate to a higher level and enjoy real success. Look back at your past experiences and acknowledge how far you have come and what you learned along the way. It may surprise you to look back at your progress and see how much you achieved. This reflection may also be what you need to bring your project to its final stages.
If loose ends still remain, the World card asks you to bring them to completion. In doing so, you will clear the space for new beginnings and opportunities to emerge.
More literally, the World can mean world travel, particularly on a large scale. You may be lucky enough to embark on a six-month overseas trip, or are working, studying or living overseas for an extended period. This card reinforces Universal understanding and global awareness, and you will find a new appreciation for people and cultures from across the world.
Reversed
The reversed World card suggests that you are seeking closure on a personal issue. Perhaps you are still emotionally attached to a past relationship and want to move on. Or you dream of the day you can fit into your old skinny jeans but realise now that your metabolism and body shape changed in the last ten years. You know, deep down, that to accept and embrace where you are now, you need to let go of the past and move on. Finding closure may be an intensely personal journey – something you manage through journaling, visualisation, energy work, and therapy.
The World reversed can signify that you want to fulfil a big goal or complete a big project, but you’re not taking all the steps necessary to get there. You may opt for the easiest or quickest path to attain your goal, but it won't lead to the outcome you intend. Climbing a mountain from the bottom up is an entirely different experience from getting a helicopter ride to the peak, even though the destination is the same. You need to experience the trials and tribulations along the way so you can learn and grow. And when you do reach your goal, you will enjoy such a fantastic sense of achievement. Don’t be afraid to set stretch goals for yourself, even if it means enduring hardships or challenges along the way; it will make the victory even sweeter.
The reversed World can also indicate a time when you are close to finishing a project or goal, but for whatever reason, you lose focus and slack off right at the end. You only have a short way to go, so why stop now? Re-energise and remind yourself how wonderful life will be when you get the thing you’ve wanted for so long.
Sometimes, the reversed World can mean a frustrating delay in completing your projects. You might miss an essential piece, and you won’t find closure until it gets worked out. You may need to get more creative to figure out how to touch the finish line.
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Thank you so much @cybervesna​ for the polish traduction from the official guide book and its associations with the characters!
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passionate-reply · 3 years
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On this episode of Great Albums, we explore a fabulous mini-LP by one of the most underrated stars of New Wave: Bill Nelson! (Not to be confused with the former senator of Florida.) Full transcript under the break.
Welcome to Passionate Reply, and welcome to Great Albums! Today’s album of choice is a bit less than an album, but more than an EP--a mini-LP, if you will. It’s Bill Nelson’s Chimera, released in 1983. Chimera features six tracks, and plays at 33 ⅓ RPM, so I’m going to go ahead and count it as an album. Whatever it is, it’s certainly something great. To quote the Bard of Avon, “though she is but little, she is fierce!”
If you aren’t familiar with Bill Nelson, I, and many other enthusiasts of his work, would be quick to recommend Chimera as an ideal introduction. Its brevity and tight aesthetic focus certainly make it an accessible listen, for one thing. And for another, Chimera captured Nelson at the arguable peak of his career, while he enjoyed the unfettered creative freedom that came with releasing music on his own private record label, Cocteau Records. Nelson’s early 80s releases were all over the map: he experimented with ambient electronic music, scores for stage and screen, and the continuation of his previous work in the 70s: New Wave art rock with a substantial synthesiser component.
Music: “Flaming Desire”
Nelson’s preceding LP, 1982’s The Love That Whirls, is a mix of poppier cuts like “Flaming Desire” as well as pieces that show his more progressive, psychedelic side, like “The Crystal Escalator In the Palace of God Department Store.” Chimera leans towards the former, but it isn’t without touches of the latter, either. Its opening track, “The Real Adventure,” is dense and complex, but its soaring refrain makes it rather easy to love from the get-go.
Music: “The Real Adventure”
Side one of Chimera is dominated by these more forceful, driving pieces. All three of them were composed around drum tracks sent to Nelson by Yukihiro Takahashi, of Yellow Magic Orchestra. Nelson is one of those artists who’s consistently resisted settling down and getting too comfortable with any particular band, and the contributions of his many guest musicians add substantial character to his releases. The second track on side one, “Acceleration,” features one of Nelson’s more consistent collaborators: his younger brother, Ian Nelson, who plays the saxophone here. I think that sax lends the song a lot of its free-wheeling, liberated sense of excitement.
Music: “Acceleration”
While there were no proper singles released from Chimera, “Acceleration” did receive a dedicated 12” in 1984, and its hooky appeal certainly justifies that. On its flip side, Chimera is much more dreamy and playful, though it maintains a strong pop core. “Glow World,” the second track on side two, features the bass guitar work of Mick Karn, formerly of Japan. I like to think “Glow World” approaches the same sort of misty, beguiling exoticism that Japan had been aiming for on their final LP, 1981’s Tin Drum.
Music: “Glow World”
The bittersweet final track of Chimera, “Another Day, Another Ray of Hope,” is both a favourite of Nelson himself as well as many of his fans. As the title suggests, the lyrics encourage listeners to look ahead with optimism, but the song’s downer melody seems more grounded in a tumultuous present than a promising future. On this track, Nelson makes remarkable use of “E-Bow guitar”--that is, using a device that allows players of electric guitar to produce sounds akin to those achieved by playing an acoustic guitar with a bow. Nelson was a pioneer of this technique, and a virtuoso guitarist in general. He may be something of a guitarist’s guitarist, but his intricate solos have always been stirring to my lay ears as well.
Music: “Another Day, Another Ray of Hope”
Chimera’s cover features stills from the music video for “Flaming Desire.” Stark and mysterious, they quite clearly channel Nelson’s interest in the experimental films of the Surrealists, like Cocteau Records’ namesake, Jean Cocteau. I suppose they’re a somewhat misleading inclusion, as “Flaming Desire” doesn’t appear on the album, but they do create an atmosphere of intrigue and mystique. Its rich fuschia background is quite striking and eye-catching, and when combined with the golden text makes for an overall pleasing colour scheme.
Chimera was originally going to be titled “Sextet,” in a clear nod to its six track length, but Nelson changed it in response to the release of Quartet, the sixth LP from Ultravox, his arguable rivals in the arena of synth-rock. I actually like “Chimera” much better as a title. If nothing else, simply being more abstract and open to interpretation makes it more interesting. Chimeric beasts composed of opposing parts, such as satyrs and minotaurs, were a common theme of the Surrealists Nelson admired, and they were often used as symbols of people torn between Freudian ego and the desires of the subconscious mind. The name fits not only the way the album’s two sides pursue different themes, but also the composite nature of the individual tracks, which were mostly stitched together in the studio. On “Tender Is the Night,” for example, Nelson himself is credited with playing every single instrument we hear, from synthesisers to marimbas.
Music: “Tender Is the Night”
After Chimera, Nelson spent several years focused almost exclusively on ambient music. But he never fully lost interest in making vocal-oriented pop, and in 1986 he aimed to release another album in that vein through a major label--in this case, CBS Records. But, as is often the case, his artistic vision for the LP ended up getting sacrificed in certain markets. Its sleeve design was replaced, due to controversy over the conflation of occult symbols and Christian imagery, and its title changed from Getting the Holy Ghost Across to On a Blue Wing. Not to mention a confusing reworking of its tracklisting!
Music: “Rise Like a Fountain”
After this release, Nelson seems to have retreated back into the world of small-time publishing for good, and it’s hard to blame him. Given the choice between kowtowing to higher-ups and sticking to his own aesthetic guns, Nelson maintained that he wanted to do the latter, and it’s hard not to respect him for that. These days, you’ll find most of his latest releases on a new private label of his, “Sonoluxe.”
My favourite track on Chimera is the last one featured on side one, “Every Day Feels Like Another New Drug.” While it starts out sounding similar enough to the first two tracks, its outro blossoms into something surprisingly experimental--a cacophony of samples, showing Nelson’s remarkable willingness to lean into advancements in electronic music technology. It’s something that sets him apart from other art rockers of his day, whose electronic dabblings were often much lighter, and something that I simply enjoy the sound of a lot. That’s all for today--thanks for listening!
Music: “Every Day Feels Like Another New Drug”
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eskelchopchop · 3 years
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tagged by @mondfuchs! :D
rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!
Uh yeeee yay For full effect, imagine me as that red-faced kid giving his presentation at the front of the classroom, talking too fast, avoiding all eye contact, and sitting down immediately before the necessary Q&A portion
5. A Standing Agreement - The one that started it all. Last Winter Break, I did nothing but replay The Witcher 3 and by the end of the gaming binge, I had the initial idea for this fic. It was the first urge I’d had to write fanfic since my Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver days, about... uh, fifteen years ago? I wrote six chapters, realized my plot structure was fatally flawed, put the fic away for five months, came back and rewrote it from top to bottom with a different focus & plot arc. It’s only 44k words, a modest length by the standard of fanfic long reads, but I’ve spent more time working on this fic than anything else that I’ve ever written. 
4.  The Color of the Wheat Fields - I found out about stillmadaboutpetra’s birthday the day before. They deserve gifts and nice things, so I wrote & edited this giftfic in a feverish last-minute fugue state. It was supposed to be a happy fic-- instead, it made them cry. Still feel bad about that. This fic is the reason I get misty-eyed whenever I see @calyxestra’s redheaded Geralt. 
3. Yearlings - Secret Santa gift fic for mondfuchs! I was aiming for a different style with this one-- sparer prose, a lot less inner monologue. I cut 2k words off the first draft, about 25% of the fic. Mondfuchs wanted a subtle fic about the unconditional trust & love that Geralt and Eskel share, so I set out to show the moment that Geskel became what they are-- that transition from bright-eyed kiddos goofing around in Kaer Morhen to the seasoned, jaded professionals who carry each other’s histories with a profound understanding beyond words. I think the fic works. Grateful to mondfuchs for the prompt & inspiration!
2. A Splinter in Time - My personal monster. This is me being my own psychopomp, marching down to the underworld and wrestling with the demons there. The fic’s not done yet; my first writing goal of the new year is to finish it. It may also be too harsh / brutal for anyone to really read, but that’s okay-- excavating that tar down in the deep is already changing me-- stories with happy endings are becoming possible again. Cheaper than therapy, if not easier.
1. After Tedd Deireádh - Artists can get kind of woo-woo about the nature of creativity and where their ideas come from. I get 100% woo-woo with this story. The first chapter poured out from who knows where, and Yen & Eskel did what they did against my own plans for the fic. It would have benefited from some editing after the fact, but oh well-- I love it in all its messy rawness. I needed a story like this. Thanks, invisible merciful muse or whatever, for donating one. 
uhhh yeah sooo I’mma tentatively tag @fayet and @stillmadaboutpetra and @lohrendrell (who tagged me in another post-- consider this a cheerful wave back! :D) and @laurelnose and @inber and @limerental, who can feel free to decline, and anyone else who wants to play because what the hell life is short and 2020 is awful and lets celebrate the good things that managed to crawl out of its toxic cesspit
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Since she began posting rustic-chic videos of her life in rural Sichuan province in 2016, Li Ziqi, 29, has become one of China’s biggest social media stars. She has 22 million followers on the microblogging site Weibo, 34 million on Douyin (China’s version of TikTok) and another 8.3 million on YouTube (Li has been active on YouTube for the last two years, despite it being officially blocked in China).
Li’s videos – which she initially produced by herself and now makes with a small team – emphasize beautiful countryside and ancient tradition. In videos soundtracked by tranquil flute music, Li crafts her own furniture out of bamboo and dyes her clothing with fruit skins. If she wants soy sauce, she grows the soybeans themselves; a video about making an egg yolk dish starts with her hatching ducklings. The meals she creates are often elaborate demonstrations of how many delicious things can be done with a particular seasonal ingredient, like ginger or green plums.
There is even a Li Ziqi online shop, where fans can purchase versions of the steel “chopper” knife she uses to dice the vegetables she plucks from her plentiful garden, or replicas of the old-fashioned shirts she wears while foraging for wild mushrooms and magnolia blossoms in the misty mountainside.
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While she occasionally reveals a behind-the-scenes peek at her process, Li – who did not respond to interview requests for this article – is very private. By all accounts, she struggled to find steady work in a city before returning to the countryside to care for her ailing grandmother (who appears in her videos).
Recently, Li has been thrust into a wider spotlight by the Chinese government, who seem to have realized her soft power potential. In 2018, the Communist party of China named her a “good young netizen” and role model for Chinese youth. In September 2019, the People’s Daily, a CPC mouthpiece, gave Li their “People’s Choice” award, while last month, state media praised Li for helping to promote traditional culture globally, and the Communist Youth League named her an ambassador of a program promoting the economic empowerment of rural youth.
Revealed: how TikTok censors videos that do not please Beijing Read more
As the government increasingly champions her, Chinese citizens have taken to Weibo to question whether Li’s polished, rather one-dimensional portrayal of farm work conveys anything truly meaningful about contemporary China – especially to her growing international audience on YouTube.
They have a point: Li’s videos reveal as much about the day-to-day labor of most Chinese farmers as the Martha Stewart Show does the American working class. As Li Bochun, director of Beijing-based Chinese Culture Rejuvenation Research Institute told the media last month: “The traditional lifestyle Li Ziqi presents in her videos is … not widely followed.”
In reality, many of China’s rural villages have shrunk or disappeared completely in past decades as the nation prioritized urbanization and workers migrated to cities, with research suggesting the country lost 245 rural villages a day from 2000 to 2010. The 40% of China’s population still living in rural areas encompass a huge diversity of experience, yet life can be difficult, with per-capita rural income declining sharply since 2014 and environmental pollution often as rife as in industrial centers. That’s not to say the beautiful forests and compelling traditions of Li’s videos are not genuine – like many social media creators, she simply focuses on the most charming elements of a bigger picture.
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So what do Li’s videos reflect about modern China, if not average daily life in the countryside?
For one, they say something about the mindset of her mainland audience – primarily urban millennials, for whom a traditional culture craze known as “fugu” or “hanfu” has been an aesthetic trend for a number of years.
“Fugu”, according to Yang Chunmei, professor of Chinese history and philosophy at Qufu Normal University, reflects the “romanticized, pastoral” desires of youth “disillusioned by today’s ever-changing, industrial, consumerist society.” In practice, it looks like young people integrating more traditional clothing into their daily looks, watching historical dramas and following rural lifestyle influencers like Li. (While Li is an extremely popular example of the trend, she’s not the only young farmer vlogging in China right now, and outdoor cooking videos of people making meals with wild ingredients and scant equipment are a genre of their own on Douyin.)
Among urban millennials in the west, giving up the nine-to-five grind and living humbly and closer to nature is a popular dream. In China, the contemporary experience of burnout is compounded by the intensity of “urban disease”, an umbrella term for the difficulties of living in megacities like Shanghai or Guangzhou, which can be used to refer to everything from traffic jams and poor air quality to employment and housing scarcity.
Also at play in Li’s popularity is the particular tenor of Chinese wistfulness. “It’s called xiangchou. Xiang means the countryside or rural life, and chou means to long for it, to miss it,” says Linda Qian, an Oxford University PhD candidate studying nostalgia’s role in the revitalization of China’s villages.
“It is quite prevalent for youth living the city life. They get really sick of [the city] so the countryside” – or a fantasy of it – “looks increasingly like the ideal image of what a good life should be.”
Qian also likens Li’s appeal to that of “Man vs Wild”-style entertainment in the west. “We’ve gotten to a certain point of materialism and consumption where there’s only so much you can buy, and we’re like, ‘What other experiences can I have?’” she says. “So we go back to what humans can do.”
Yet as her fame grows internationally, some have questioned, in comments, blogposts and Reddit threads, whether Li’s channel is communist propaganda.
In addition to providing China a form of international PR, Li embodies a kind of rural success the government hopes to generate more of through recent initiatives. With the aim of alleviating rural poverty, the Communist Youth League has embarked on an effort to send more than 10 million urban youth to “rural zones” by 2022, in order to “increase their skills, spread civilization, and promote science and technology”.
“We need young people to use science and technology to help the countryside innovate its traditional development models,” Zhang Linbin, deputy head of a township in central Hunan province, told the Global Times last April.
By using technology to create her own rural economic opportunities while simultaneously championing forms of traditional Chinese culture before a huge audience, Li may seem like a CPC dream come true.
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According to Professor Ka-Ming Wu, a cultural anthropologist at the Chinese University of Hong Kong: “Li represents a new wave of Chinese soft power in that she’s so creative and aesthetically good, and knows how to appeal to a general audience whether they’re Chinese or not.” And yet, “I don’t think this is some kind of engineered effort by the Chinese state,” she says.
Li’s narrative hinges on her failure to thrive in the city; that failure is antithetical to China’s overarching narrative of progress and urban opportunity. Were she a manufactured agent of propaganda, Wu speculates, “[Her failure] is something the Chinese state would never even mention.
“And I think that’s what really fuels her popularity,” says Wu. “That despair of not being able to find oneself in the ‘Chinese dream’. I don’t think she’s propaganda because one of her major successes is that she’s making that failure highly aesthetic … However, the Chinese government is very smart to appropriate her work and say that she represents traditional culture and promote her.”
According to some Chinese media, Li’s content is better than propaganda – doing more to generate genuine domestic, and especially international, interest in rural Chinese traditions than any government initiative of the past decade. “Dozens of government departments with billions at their disposal spent 10 years on propaganda projects, but they have done a worse job than a little girl,” writes the South China Morning Post’s Chauncey Jung, summarizing a tweet from journalist Jasper Jia.
However you feel about Li as a cultural force, her ability to flourish despite a unique set of contradictory circumstances is impressive. Out of the past and present, failure and success, independence and authoritarianism, she’s spun a truly pleasant vision. If only life was really so simple.
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Beautiful Day: The Don Hertzfeldt Q&A.
In which the singular creator of It’s Such a Beautiful Day and the World of Tomorrow trilogy answers 57 questions put to him by the Letterboxd community, about death, gills, snacks, back flips, the best time of day to watch a movie, and the sick pleasure of emotionally destroying people.
Since his first animated outings in the 1990s, filmmaker Don Hertzfeldt has had a way of staring deeply into humanity’s soul via a humble stick figure, and his skill at blending existential questions with situational humor breeds intense reactions. To browse Letterboxd reviews of Hertzfeldt’s animated works is to meet film lovers at a rare, collective gathering point: heaping great piles of love for films that do “the exact opposite of helping with depression”.
There’s something optimistically anti-feel-good in Hertzfeldt’s works; a bleak view of the future, and a frank appreciation of death’s inevitability, that makes viewers urgently want to fix the way they’re living right now. “I’ve built a lot of my life philosophy on the messages of this film,” writes Misty, of his acclaimed It’s Such a Beautiful Day. “It has kicked my ass completely,” writes Dirk of the first, Oscar-nominated World of Tomorrow instalment, “making me angry at myself for letting trivial stuff take over things I love and making me happy I have so very, very much in my life to enjoy and be grateful for.”
The filmmaker’s magic lies as much in the process as the content: “Hertzfeldt is able to make every moment count,” writes Artpig, of the second WoT instalment, The Burden of Other People’s Thoughts, “every line of dialogue, every moment of silence, every note of music, every line of animation.” The World of Tomorrow films, says animation expert Toussaint Egan in our Letterboxd Show animation episode, are “some of the best science fiction films, period”.
And his timing. Oh, his timing. Just as the northern hemisphere days were turning cold, and the drawn-out misery of the pandemic was really taking hold all over again, Hertzfeldt tweeted:
WORLD OF TOMORROW EPISODE THREE everywhere october 9 5pm est 🚀
— don hertzfeldt (@donhertzfeldt)
October 8, 2020
And like that, World of Tomorrow Three: The Absent Destinations of David Prime was ours, an overnight gift to the quarantined and bereaved-weary, on Vimeo for all to rent or own. The gifts, they keep coming: a master list of movies that have their fingerprints on the World of Tomorrow universe, and now, in recognition of our community’s love for his films—and in his signature lower-case—the answers to questions asked in an exclusive Letterboxd Q&A.
To make things easier for Don, we grouped similar questions (and have noted which members asked what). Read on for more than you ever thought you might get to know about Hertzfeldt’s process, brain, heart and influences.
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Filmmaker Don Hertzfeldt.
From “holograms that yell at you!” to the stunning colors, textures and folds of the blue mountains, to attributes David progressively deletes to make room for memories, would you please give us an insight into World of Tomorrow Three’s world-building process? —Letterboxd in the grand scheme of the series, episodes one and two still felt like baby steps to me. episode three was my first chance to really start blowing things up and exploring this universe. when i’m writing, i don’t want to worry about going over the top or think about structure or meaning or really much of anything yet. writing is playtime, it should be fun and messy. i want to go over the top. there is no top. i don’t want to start thinking too much until i’m rewriting and sorting through it all. thinking too much too soon can get in the way, like being too aware of when you’re trying to fall asleep. when you write a diary entry or a text to a friend, there’s no self-consciousness or creative blocks, you just write. it’s casual and fluid and automatic. but if you’re asked to write a term paper or a screenplay, suddenly all those lights turn off. it can be paralyzing. it’s hard to get to that place of truly not caring what anyone thinks and approach all forms of writing just as freely as writing those immediate thoughts in your diary. but that’s what i try to do.
When you start writing a new piece, do you usually start with a plot idea, a thematic idea, one uniform philosophical notion, or a little bit of each? —Kodiak J. Sanders, Trenz, Mr. Tables i don’t think i ever write in a straight line. i’ll jot down a hundred stray ideas over time, and one day i’ll sit down and see what connections might be made out of them. i really want this scene to be in the movie, so how do i get there? this is a good line, how can i get a character to say it? so the actual story usually only starts to reveal itself when i sit down to logic all these bits and pieces out. hey, in order to connect this strange idea to that strange idea, suddenly there is a very interesting third scene.
I’m astounded by how much the animation and the visuals improve with each instalment of World of Tomorrow. What have you done differently for each one? —Aske Lund, Cringetacular the characters needed to physically perform a lot more in episodes two and three so there were more demands put on the animation. when emily 4 dances or david staggers up a mountain, those sorts of scenes were animated in “ones”, which means doing 24 drawings per second versus my usual twelve. it’s still all 2D hand animation, just more of a classic disney approach that gives the movement a smoother look and a little more room for nuance. and obviously it takes a lot more work. but i hesitate to call such things improvements because i’m not sure i like the idea of different techniques being thought of as good or bad. it’s just another way of doing things. it really depends, sometimes super limited animation can be more effective.
Likewise, Part Three’s sound design is incredible. What conditions did you create it in, and what are all those sounds, and how do you have such an incredible command of the cut-to-silence trick?! —Letterboxd thanks, the sound design is always my favorite thing to do. other than julia’s lines, it’s easy to forget that all the animation starts with dead silence. obviously there’s no sound coming from a live-action set. so adding sound and music to everything, usually pretty late in production, is when all the stuff i’ve been working on suddenly starts to feel like an actual movie. this is not a future that works very well—particularly david’s, which predates everything else we’ve seen so far by a century or two—so you’re hearing a lot of creaky old hard drives booting up, electric distortions, and bent circuits from broken toys.
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Emily and Emily Prime in a still from ‘World of Tomorrow’ (2015).
World of Tomorrow used to fill me with existential dread, but now with the current state of the world it’s become more and more comforting in a strange way. Do you feel that at all as you make new episodes? —mariano gg i wish that were possible but when i’m making something i’m usually so close to it i’m unable to see anything but all the things i need to fix.
Can you talk a little bit about sourcing the photo-realistic images for the backgrounds in Part Three? —Jack Moulton most of the environments were 2D images i built in photoshop, usually starting from close-up photos of different textures (like sandstone), all sort of reshaped and puzzle-pieced into something new. an easy to see example was david’s cockpit, which was cobbled together from all sorts of different old aircraft engine and machine parts. the trick in building and lighting these locations was always figuring out where the line was drawn in making these places realistic, but not too realistic for minimal characters to inhabit. i kept landing on a sort of painterly looking middle ground.
If the cloning process in World of Tomorrow existed right now, would you go through that process and create clones of yourself to prolong your life? —tim probably not, that process doesn’t seem to work so well.
If you were put into the world you’ve created, would you buy gills? —Lauren Torres i tend to avoid putting my head under because i almost always get water in my ears so i guess i wouldn’t need them. gills also seem like they’d be a real nuisance to keep clean.
What does love mean, and why do your characters go through so much effort to find it? —Andrew Michalko oh man.
In this year of years, what do you hope people will understand about death and its inevitability (or is it all there on the screen, and if so, that’s okay too)? —Letterboxd understanding death and its inevitability is maybe the most valuable thing a person can do for themselves.
Was the absence of Emily Prime in Part Three a practical decision [Don’s then-four-year-old niece Winona provided Emily’s voice] or an intentional departure from the first two films? —Michael it was both. i couldn’t find a way to fit her in naturally and i also felt like the series needed to start growing in other directions and not rest on the past. episode two had also been really difficult to write, it was so reliant on winona’s recordings, and it felt like the dam was really broken when i was finally able to write without any restrictions this time.
In a series like World of Tomorrow, where you headed in a direction that is a lot more plot-driven than your previous work, how far in advance do you plan? Did you always know this was in David’s past, or are these stories told one at a time? —Ryan Welch, Kodiak J. Sanders, julius, Alex Leon i could tell early on that this wasn’t a story like it’s such a beautiful day with a clear beginning, middle and end, but a much wilder thing that could continue to grow. the openness of it is still what makes it so interesting to me. i have all sorts of notes for the next episodes but if i already knew what would happen in episode nine i think that would take a lot of the air out of the tires and i’d start to feel like i was just connecting the boring dots. while writing, i’ve also had to be aware that there someday might be an episode nine so i can’t go wrecking the timelines before i get there.
What were the rocks and the gas pump that Emily fell in love with meant to represent? —Ekaneff she was learning how to love, and like all of us, in her youth she gravitated to a bunch of individuals that were wrong for her.
Aside from the ability to release more frequently, is there something about the episodic structure that you prefer/appreciate, as opposed to creating one larger feature-length film? —SiddFinch1 there’s just more freedom. the traditional running time of a feature film, 90 to 120 minutes, is a totally arbitrary number.
Have you ever considered writing a World of Tomorrow book or graphic novel? —Jay Smith the earliest ideas for world of tomorrow were sloshing around in a graphic novel called the end of the world that came out in 2013. but i don’t have any talent or much confidence in making another book like that. it’s a different world. when i look at someone like chris ware and then look at something like the end of the world, it’s like, “wow, baby made a mess”.
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A page from Don Hertzfeldt’s graphic novel, ‘The End of the World’ (2013).
What attracted you to the unique style [of minimalist stick figures]? Is there a sense of intimacy that you feel you can achieve with this simplicity? —Evan Whitford when i was little, before i wanted to make movies i wanted to be a newspaper cartoonist. i think my drawings today might have more in common with newspaper comics than the sort of characters you usually see in animation. comic-strip panels were always composed in a very reserved way because they were generally intended to be skimmed. you needed to be able to read the strip in five seconds so you could be off to read the sports pages and obituaries. the comics pages were also under constant size and space restrictions. so they were minimal by design and the artists reduced their characters to only their most essential parts. there was no room for fussing. charles schulz said “i only draw what’s necessary”. and that’s actually incredibly hard to do. you’re accomplishing so much more with so much less.
i’ve also found that if there’s a scene that’s not playing right and bothering me, most of the time it’s because my composition was too cluttered. i almost always find myself removing things from the frame and trying to pare it down to only what’s necessary. very rarely do i ever think ‘i need to add more stuff in here’. because this shot is only five seconds long and i want you to be looking over here when this moment happens and this character says something, and if you’re distracted by this other flickering junk i put in the corner it’s going to throw everything off.
Animation-aside, which creative medium do you resonate with the most? —Bronkdan music.
How much did you pull from real-life experiences to make It’s Such A Beautiful Day, if any? What research did you conduct into memory? —Gunnar Sizemore, David Sigura, Micah Smith whenever i got a little stuck writing it’s such a beautiful day, i’d go back and reread my journal and pull more things out of it. dreams, conversations, small scenes. reading the journal now, it seems like i stole something from it every few pages. i also heavily researched neurological problems. it’s never said in the movie what exactly’s going on with bill, but i needed there to be a real diagnosis to base the medical writing on. so all the things he’s going through are real treatments or symptoms based on an actual condition. i didn’t want to ever come out and say, “he’s got terminal brain clouds”, or whatever in the movie, because then it becomes a “brain-cloud movie”, and that’s too easy for the audience to compartmentalize and distance themselves from… “brain clouds are so rare, that will never happen to me”. but not being told exactly what’s wrong with bill might help make the story more relatable and universal.
In what ways have you kept your mind fresh creatively? How do you keep yourself from slipping into complacency? —Watchmoviez, Drew’s reviews most creative blocks or stagnation come from anxiety, second-guessing and doubt. over the years i’ve learned to just sort of calm down and trust myself more. it’s like the old aesop fable: when you stop thrashing around in the water, the water becomes clearer and you can see more. if a scene isn’t working right, i can more easily chill out about it these days and trust that i’ll eventually figure it out—because i’ve figured these sorts of things out a hundred times before and i know by now that i’m not the sort of person who’s just going to allow a scene that isn’t working to remain in the movie. there’s a little more panic about that sort of thing when you’re young: “oh no, the movie sucks right now, will it always suck?!” i’ve reached the point where i know that i will not let it suck. and that sort of thinking allows all the movie gears to turn more easily.
Do you have a specific thematic, emotional or other miscellaneous motive in mind when including classical music pieces? —James Y. Lee when i’m listening to music and suddenly the right piece arrives, it’s usually blindingly obvious to me: there’s just no doubt this needs to be in the movie somehow. it’s like the idea has always existed and i’ve just finally uncovered it. it’s the same with writing. when the right thing floats along, it is striking and obvious and into the pile of notes it goes.
How much of your animation style lends itself to experimentation, such as discovering new tricks and pretty shots, that is then discarded if you learn it doesn’t work as intended? —Adam, Jacob i think i’m always experimenting. i figure if it doesn’t work, at least i’ve learned something.
What is the strangest compliment or critique you’ve gotten personally or of your work? —Elliot Taylor i’ve always remembered this one. i am so proud of you came out a couple years after everything will be ok. it was a continuation of that story, so it was basically the first time i had ever made a sequel. and everything will be ok had done really well when it came out. it won sundance and got all these great reviews. so i am so proud of you comes out and i remember reading this review that says, “everything will be ok was probably my favorite animated short of all time. it honestly changed my life. it was funny, sad, beautiful and just so wonderful. everything will be ok, boy did i love it. incredible. two thumbs up. truly, best thing ever. wow. so, unfortunately, its sequel, i am so proud of you, just feels like more of the same.”
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A still image from ‘It’s Such a Beautiful Day’ (2012).
Are there any pieces of fiction that have influenced your work that we probably wouldn’t think of? —Gyani Wasp, Mikolaj Perzyna, Aaron McMillan, Harrison, Axel, Cringetacular, The25centman, Hunter Guidry one thing that pops to mind is the phantom tollbooth. my favorite children’s books were the ones with all the fun metaphors and clever wordplay. when i was plotting out episode two i wanted to lean into that, where visiting different sections of emily’s brain would be like milo visiting the land of math, the land of letters, the land of sound, with different looks and logic to it. so we had the bog of realism, glimmers of hope, broken memories, the logic center, and all the stuff in triangle land and square land. i guess that’s a lot but i wish there had been a bit more.
How did your friends and family respond to the “my anus is bleeding” part of Rejected? —Alex Tatterson they were pretty used to me by then.
Do you know of the work of David Firth, the internet animator? His work is also surreal and has dark humor, but more sinister than whimsical. Would you ever consider making an animation in the realm of horror in future? —KEVIИ HДWKIИS i’m afraid i don’t know him. i’d love to make a horror movie. from a certain point of view though maybe it could be argued that most everything i’ve made is a sort of horror movie?
My first tattoo is of Billy from Billy’s Balloon hanging from his ankle and it was the best decision I’ve ever made. How do you feel about people having your work tattooed and do you have any ink from other creatives that have meant something to you? —Elias it really fucking enrages me when people get my stuff tattooed on them. no just kidding. mostly i feel embarrassed but i’m glad you haven’t changed your mind about it yet. sometimes i wonder how many people have.
Have you ever thought about directing live action? —Abeer, Noah Thompson yes.
Is there an update on your feature film Antarctica? —Rylan California it’s one of many things swirling around.
Will you do a remake of Robocop and why not next year? —Simon no, because robocop is already sort of perfect.
Do you ever see yourself directing a large studio film? Or working with a large team to make something with a higher budget, maybe through a crowd-funded project? Or do you just strongly prefer working on your own? —Vteyshev, Monotone Duck sure. i’ve never preferred working on my own at all. it was usually just the only way to ever get anything made. i haven’t had the funding to pay a big crew, or really much of a crew at all. there’s the old saying: you can make something good, you can make it fast, and you can make it cheap, but you can only pick two. if you make it good and fast it won’t be cheap, if you make it cheap and fast it won’t be good, etc. so my only route in hoping to make something good and cheap has been to totally forget about making it fast.
What did you find digital animation added or took away from your work, and what did those changes do for your storytelling? Will you continue using the digital medium when/if you decide to move on from the World of Tomorrow project? —Alec Lai, Slipkornbizkit, Aldo digital just sped everything up. it’s still one person drawing everything, so we need to remember that speed is relative here, but i felt like i went from riding a bicycle to driving a car. there are many pleasant, wonderful things about riding a bicycle but you’re not going to get anywhere very quickly. and i’m not in my 20s anymore, in fact my 20s and 30s were mostly entirely devoured by making movies in what was maybe the slowest way possible. so these days i am appreciating the speed of digital.
If you could have a conversation with any filmmaker, dead or alive, who would it be and why? —ToBeHonest, Cringetacular if i could resurrect one of my heroes from the dead i think i would feel terrible wasting his time forcing him to have a conversation with me. he might also just sit there, covered with graveyard dirt, screaming in horror.
What is the best time of day to watch a movie? —Sammy night. i always feel a little nuts coming out of a movie and the sun is still up.
What’s your all-time favorite science-fiction film, and why? —Letterboxd 2001. because come on.
What is your favorite of Julia Potts’ films, and why? —Letterboxd i like the one with the severed foot.
Are there any animated films that you felt had a profound impact on you as a child? —Sprizzle probably fantasia. and ray harryhausen stuff. whenever there was a sunday-afternoon movie on TV, my brother and i learned that if in the opening titles there was a credit for “special effects” we should keep watching because we might eventually see something cool.
Which one of your movies is your personal favorite? —Jakob Böwer, RodrigoJerez i don’t know. sometimes it’s the newest one because it’s usually the one with the most experience behind it and therefore feels like it has the fewest mistakes. but then over time i realize they’re all riddled with mistakes. of the it’s such a beautiful day pieces, i think my favorite has always been i am so proud of you. and then i’ll see reviews that say “clearly the second chapter is the weakest one”, and i’ll think, man you guys don’t know what you’re talking about.
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One of Don’s layout sketches for ‘I Am So Proud of You’ (2008).
What’s your favorite Pixar film? —Jordan inside out.
What film would you want to be the last one you watch before you die? —Gavin honestly if i’m in the process of dying i hope i won’t be watching movies at all.
Do you have faith in humanity? —Connor Kriechbaum not often.
What is something that worries you about where humankind is headed? —Felix_Bouchard social media.
What is the most valuable thing you have ever lost? How often do you think about it? —Siminup well now i’m getting sad.
Can you do a back flip, mister Don? —Doug maybe with the help of a catapult.
What is your take on the after life? What do you think happens to us when we die? —Luisdecoss i guess that it’s probably a lot like our memory of what the year 1823 was like.
Do you want anything from McDonald’s? —Andrew Rhyne only if i’m in an airport and desperate.
What’s your favorite meal or snack? —Pfitzerone, Evan lately in quarantine i’ve been discovering this particular breakfast burrito.
How’s your quarantine life, Don? —Ivan Arcena it’s okay thanks. eating lots of breakfast burritos.
Hi! I can’t believe you’re going to read this. I am currently filled with an unparalleled amount of joy, wow. This is a long shot but here I go. I’m 17 and your (self-proclaimed) biggest fan. I’ve seen It's Such a Beautiful Day eight times now and every single time I pick up on more details. I’ve watched a few of your interviews and in the AFS one about Rejected you said that the louder you play a movie, the funnier it is. On my seventh watch of It’s Such a Beautiful Day I hooked my laptop up to three huge speakers and I must say—you were so, so right. I made a video essay about the movie. Lol, I’m not sure if this will get to you but Michael Jordan once said something about missing shots or not taking shots or maybe about tequila, I am unsure but I know it was important. Thanks MJ. Not you, Mr Jackson. I’m sorry Ms. Jackson…
I actually do have a question, sorry about the rambling. Every single time I watch the guy at the payphone flip his pencil and go “fantastic, fantastic” I cry. And I think what really does it for me is that “we’ll finally have our day”. Earlier in the movie, Bill’s co-worker talks about how all of time is happening at once. So what I constantly ask myself is if the guy at the payphone is simultaneously having his day and waiting for it. And I’m no longer speaking to that one specific example or even to the movie as a whole but I guess I’m wondering if the idea of all events happening at once comforts you?
In Slaughterhouse Five, Kurt Vonnegut writes: “The most important thing I learned on Tralfamadore was that when a person dies he only appears to die. He is still very much alive in the past, so it is very silly for people to cry at his funeral. All moments past, present and future, always have existed, always will exist.” When I read this I immediately thought about your movie. I think the idea of all of time happening at once makes all of life feel less important but more special. You know? Anyway, I suppose I’d just like to know what inspired the lines about time in the office scene. This isn’t much of a question, more an incoherent ramble but thank you so, so much for all you’ve done. I feel so incredibly inspired and so deeply moved by your work and I know that so many people in this comment section and around the world would agree. I can’t believe I’ve been given the opportunity to ask something. It really is such a beautiful day. :) —Eli Osei (co-signed by Vooder) that old guy at the payphone was someone i saw at the laundromat once and he borrowed my pencil and the whole thing just played out like in the movie. i just thought it was such a perfect little scene that i’d just witnessed. anyway, the idea of time being a landscape and everything taking place “at once” just came straight out of a science magazine. i don’t know how, but apparently it’s been more or less proven to be true? we perceive time in one direction, but the past and the future are always all around us. think of it as though we’re driving our car through a landscape. even though the mountains we saw ten minutes ago are behind us now, it doesn’t mean those mountains have ceased to exist. they’ve only ceased to exist from our point of view. we’ve only just driven past them. the mountains, like your childhood, are still going on back there. anyway, i had never heard of that before and thought it needed to be in a movie.
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A still from ‘World of Tomorrow Episode Two: The Burden of Other People’s Thoughts’ (2017).
Are you a fan of Kurt Vonnegut by any chance? It may be coincidental, but I love how you both utilize science-fiction settings and concepts like being “unstuck from time/memory” to explore the human condition. I feel his writing and your animation are both capable of making me laugh wholeheartedly one minute and weeping genuine, sorrowful tears the next. —Vooder i’m embarrassed to say i’ve never read him and i’m told on a regular basis that i should. that all started after i am so proud of you came out with those discussions about time being a landscape. but i almost only ever read non-fiction. it’s a long story. but now i’m almost afraid to ever read vonnegut after all these years of build-up.
Hey Don, this is really cool. I don’t have as much of a question, more of a comment. It’s Such A Beautiful Day has gotten me through a lot of hard times, being in middle school sucks, I think everyone knows that: and your movie has made life just a wee bit better for me. It also gave me the inspiration and motivation to finish my first feature! Thanks lots. Love from Indiana —Blood Mountain: Experimental Cinema <3 hey thank you. yeah middle school was pretty much the deepest pit of hell. there’s this old saying, “if you find yourself in hell, keep going”. and i’ve never understood that saying. “keep going”, because, i guess, you can always just go deeper into hell?
Hi! Has the vitreous humour in your eyes started to deteriorate and have you experienced floaters within your eyeballs? If not, that’s okay. Just remember it’s part of life, so don’t get scared when it happens! Just keep moving on! But if you do have them, follow-up question: Do you think it’s funny that the body of vitreous fluid that allows your sight to be clear is called the vitreous humour, and when it detaches it’s anything but humorous? I find that pretty humorous myself, in, like, an ironic way. —Clbert1 i actually blew a blood vessel in my eye a couple weeks ago and the whole thing turned bright blood red. it didn’t hurt or anything, i just walked into the room all disgusting and my girlfriend was like, “what the fuck?!” and then the next day i had further weird eye problems. i just went to the eye doctor yesterday. i think i will be fine but i was thinking, wouldn’t it be like the most heavy metal thing ever for my biography if i just suddenly went BLIND? “and then in 2020, HE WENT BLIND.”
Will Intro ever be released to the general public outside of theater screenings? —Melissa okay yes you’ve talked me into it. on that note, i noticed that the poster of intro used on letterboxd is a weird fake and i’m not sure where it came from. someone just used a picture from rejected. if fake posters are to be made i would prefer it if they used a picture from raiders of the lost ark or something.
Do you have plans to combine the World of Tomorrow shorts into one feature-length film à la It’s Such a Beautiful Day? —David Sigura, Sam Stewart, An_Person no, it’s going to be much longer than a feature-length.
Will we ever get a ‘Hertzfeldt 4K Collection’? Or at least a Blu-ray with It’s Such a Beautiful Day and all episodes of World of Tomorrow? —Teebin, HippityHoppity there is actually already a blu-ray for it’s such a beautiful day. up next we’ll do some sort of world of tomorrow blu-ray of the first three episodes. but 4k is too many k’s. you don’t need that many k’s.
Would you ever consider comprising an OST album of all the songs you used and mixed from your films? —PhiloDemon i don’t think so. i read that for many years cat stevens resisted releasing his original songs from harold and maude on any records because he thought they were more special if you could only ever hear them in the movie. i like that.
Do you get a sick kind of pleasure from emotionally destroying people with your movies? —MaxT26 yep.
What’s been your ongoing experience of the outpouring of joy and love of your work? —Henry gratitude. how sad for me if, after all this work, nobody was watching at all.
Related content
Don’s invaluable Twitter thread about “old-school animation camera stuff”
A Few of the Fingerprints on the World of Tomorrow Universe: a list of influences curated for Letterboxd by Don Hertzfeldt
Modest Heroes: the Letterboxd Showdown for indie animation
The Drawn Cinema: Analena’s list of rough animation, pencil textures, watercolor effects, dynamic brushes and other poetic artistry.
Beloved Indie Animation: a list by Gui
Animated Sci-Fi and Fantasy: an extensive list by Stonefolk
‘World of Tomorrow Three: The Absent Destinations of David Prime’ is available now through Bitter Films on Vimeo.
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thezodiaczone · 4 years
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Capricorn Compatibility
CAPRICORN + ARIES (MARCH 21 - APRIL 19) Aries is the Alpha in most relationships, but here the Ram meets his match. In the Goat, Aries finds a more seasoned pack leader, and backs into a rare state of obedience. This weighty respect comes from Capricorn's ruler, wise old Saturn, the planet of maturity, authority and command. Capricorn is the zodiac's father sign; Aries is its firstborn child. It's the difference between a king and a knight, a queen and a duchess. Both are noble, but one is clearly the elder. This can be a dealbreaker for Aries in some cases, as too much paternalism makes this independent sign run for freedom. However, it usually works. Although Aries can be a hellish brat, Capricorn is unruffled and even amused by the tantrums, giving Aries space to act out. If you accept your cosmic roles, you can make excellent partners in both love and business. Aries is ruled by warrior Mars, and Capricorn is a four-star general by nature. You both see life as a battlefield to conquer, and with Aries' grit and Cap's determination, there's no goal you can't achieve. Earthy Capricorn excels at structure and planning, and is the terra firm beneath the Ram's restless hooves. Fiery Aries is a daring playmate who amuses, excites and entertains the sober Goat, especially in the bedroom (where Capricorn has a lesser-known lusty side). Aries is a flirt, and this can spark jealousy in traditional Capricorn. Over time, trust and mutual respect abolish the Goat's fears, and you make supportive lifelong partners.
CAPRICORN + TAURUS (APRIL 20 - MAY 20) ♥♥♥♥ You're fellow Earth signs who really vibe well together. By day, you're both hard-driving workaholics. Taurus is the plodding Bull, Capricorn the sure-footed Mountain Goat. Any business venture you launch together will thrive, and you share a deep respect for tradition, family and long-term security. You're both shrewd financial planners, though your love of earthly pleasures can break the bank, too. Once you punch out and uncork the Sancerre, you morph into a pair of hedonists. Sleeping and lounging are favorite pastimes, and on weekends, a forklift couldn't pry you off the sofa. However, Capricorn is far more self-disciplined than the indulgent Bull. Taurus is ruled by Venus, the goddess of beauty and pleasure; Capricorn by strict Saturn, the cosmic taskmaster. Where Taurus is a megalomaniac forever humming his own praise song, poor Cappy flogs himself for even the slightest misstep. Saturn's repression also gives Cap an eccentric side; he can fall into melancholy or fatalistic spells that confound Taurus. The Goat is always planning for rainy days—and as karma goes, plan for a downpour, and you'll surely get one. Taurus refuses to pack an umbrella, for he can't fathom worrying about something that hasn't even happened yet, nor shown up on the radar. You both have something to teach each other. The Bull is gifted at savoring the present, while nostalgic Capricorn obsesses over the past and the future. Strive to get your timing right.
CAPRICORN + GEMINI (MAY 21 - JUNE 20) A metaphor for this match: a music producer combines a soulful 1970s classic (Capricorn) with funky electronic hooks (Gemini) and delivers a mashup that's either a mess or a chart-topping hit. You couldn't be any more different if you tried, yet you can really benefit from each other's natural resources. Gemini is ruled by speedy Mercury, the lightning-fast trickster who speaks in silver-tongued half truths. Capricorn's overlord is Saturn, the cautious, conservative planetary patriarch, who only trusts that which stands the test of time. Gemini is versatile and restless, like a fusebox with a million criss-crossed wires. Capricorn is the dutiful ox who carries the yoke and plows the field, rarely diverging from routine. While Capricorn's dogged consistency and family loyalty can frustrate Gemini ("How can you let these people walk all over you?" Gemini asks, referring to Cap's elderly parents), it also grounds the scattered Twins.Gemini is Capricorn's one-man circus, keeping the Goat amused and entertained, adding color to his monochromatic world. You both have a lusty, experimental side, too. The magic really appears when you get physical, which happens fast, since your sexual attraction is intense. In fact, Capricorn is one of the few signs that can spike Gemini's jealousy. There are so many people who rely on sturdy, supportive Cap, and Gemini doesn't like to compete for the spotlight. To make this work, Gemini will have to accept that Capricorn's loyalty extends to family and lifelong friends. Stoic Cap will need to show a little more emotion, since impish Gemini needs to know he can get under Capricorn's skin. It will take time to work out the kinks, but the erotic tet-a-tets will be worth the trouble.
CAPRICORN + CANCER (JUNE 21 - JULY 22) ♥♥♥♥ Paging June and Ward Cleaver! Cancer is astrology's mother and Capricorn is its patriarch. You're opposite signs that might very well polarize into these retro roles. On the zodiac wheel, Cancer rules the fourth house of home, family and femininity. Capricorn governs its tenth house of fatherhood, authority, masculinity and ambition. In many ways, it's nice to have a mate who happily redresses your shortcomings. Yet, it can also be off-putting. Cancer longs for touch and affection, misty-eyed Hallmark moments and emotionally naked conversations. Stoic Capricorn can be stiff and formal, a closet neurotic who pooh-poohs Cancer's feelings as overblown melodramas. In truth, Capricorn just internalizes his feelings, then falls into depressions or flogs himself mercilessly. You must learn the other's "love language" to succeed as a couple.Cancer shows caring through sentimental gestures, food, togetherness and well-intended nagging. Capricorn's expression is through duty—bringing home a steady paycheck, showing up on time, holding it together when everyone else falls apart. Capricorn must learn to honor Cancer's feelings and intuition; the Crab must develop gratitude for Capricorn's loyalty and quiet wisdom. Parenting is where you really shine as a team. Raising children is the ultimate honor for your signs, as well as a creative challenge. You're both loyal to your families, no matter how much they drive you crazy. This is a quality you respect in each other. At the end of the day, you share enough common values to make a solid, lifelong match.
CAPRICORN + LEO (JULY 23 - AUGUST 22) You're insatiably attracted, but you often end up hurting each other through a series of misunderstandings and ego battles. Leo is ruled by the confident Sun, Capricorn by self-doubting Saturn. That's just the start of your differences. Leo is a starry-eyed Fire sign who believes that anything can be achieved by sheer willpower and the refusal to take "no" for an answer. Capricorn is a traditional Earth sign, equally ambitious, but rarely willing to color outside the lines. He approaches life like a steady Mountain Goat, taking tentative steps toward his ten-year goals. Your different pacing could drive you both mad. Although loyal Capricorn is usually the stalwart partner in relationships, Leo is far more devoted in this match. Lusty Capricorn is mostly interested in sex. While you'll have plenty of hot romps, Leo can mistake Capricorn's physical attraction for love. Oops! The Lion must perform due diligence, and assume nothing. Unlike Leo, Capricorn's love is hard-won, not something he hands out like candy to Trick-or-Treaters. Then, there's the cheerleading that grates on the Goat. Leo urges Cap to believe in himself, which the Goat laughs off as fluff ripped straight from a cheesy self-help tome. Yet, lo!—Leo follows Covey's seven steps and becomes a highly successful person. Instead of congratulating Leo, war is declared: Capricorn scoffs at Leo's dreams, and Leo sets out to prove Capricorn wrong ("I'll show you!"). Before long, you stay together just to spite each other. What's the point?
CAPRICORN + VIRGO (AUGUST 23 - SEPTEMBER 22) ♥♥♥♥ You're pragmatic Earth signs who strike a perfect balance between sensible and sensual. You bring out the best in one another. Virgo is ruled by Mercury, the communication planet. A natural psychologist and articulate speaker, this sign likes to talk everything out. Stoic Capricorn is ruled by stern, repressed Saturn, and struggles to voice his feelings. Capricorn benefits from Virgo's ability to draw him out of dark thoughts. When Virgo's anxieties take hold, practical Capricorn brings a helpful dose of perspective. Dutiful souls, you take care of parents, friends and family members, and your cozy home is everyone's favorite crash pad. Holidays and parties are warm, congenial affairs, and nobody wants to leave. Marriage is a sure success, and you laugh often, excellent medicine for your serious signs. The lovely thing about this combination is how natural you can be—a refreshing break from your formal public demeanors. A favorite example: One Virgo friend, a singer-songwriter, was stricken with a creative block. Her Capricorn husband poked his head into her studio, and found her obsessing. She launched into complaining, and he deftly interrupted: "Wanna f---?" A satisfied hour later, she finished the song. Offensive to prim Virgo from any other sign, but Capricorn can go there. You relax into your carnal natures around each other, loosening up in ways that few other signs can elicit.
CAPRICORN + LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 23 - OCTOBER 22) Capricorn is the provider sign, forever seeking a mate in need of financial backing. Libra is a vain dilettante who's happy to play muse to an Earthy benefactor. You have your oft-irreconcilable differences, yet you stay together all the same. In many ways, you have what the other needs. Libra is a master of social graces with a billion air-kissed "friends." Capricorn can be an antisocial grumble-puss who cleaves to childhood cronies and family. Libra spends on impulsive pleasures; Capricorn plans for tomorrow. Battles can be brutal. You're both convinced of your natural superiority; your haughty contretemps and ego showdowns merit a Bravo series. Of course, antisocial Capricorn would never allow cameras into the estate, while Libra would whip together a stylist, understudy and five-star craft services. Therein lies the difference: your values. Not an easy hurdle to scale, even for a determined Goat or a patient Judge. A successful relationship will require much compromise. The fawning affection romantic Libra craves will be in short order. Capricorn shows love through acts of service and loyalty, not pandering. Libra must learn to accept love in a less-adorned package, and trade a few parties for cozy nights in. Capricorn must exit the cave to meet new people, play host and smile once a season. You can do it—but will you be happy? That's the question.
CAPRICORN + SCORPIO (OCTOBER 23 - NOVEMBER 21) ♥♥♥♥ If you were to sign a pre-nup, Schedule A must clearly designate who will play the "Top" and who will be the "Bottom." After your attorneys haggle over the prone position, you may just call off the engagement. An inability to reach settlement is likely for two uncompromising Alphas such as yourselves. Although your business-savvy signs can make quite the contemporary Napoleon and Josephine, LLC, there are terms that must be negotiated in advance. For one, you'll need to swear off secrecy—and that will be the true test of your relationship. Scorpio and Capricorn are masters of underhanded power plays that could topple this merger fast. Your first job: learn and practice direct communication ("whip me like THIS" or "no, darling, the leather corset, not the PVC"). Master it, and the rest is a cakewalk. You can lash each other to bedposts, tryst on the conference table in your glass-paned office tower, or earn your mile-high wings with nary a flight attendant knowing. The 2.5 kids you produce will have some interesting conception stories, that's for sure. Not that you'll ever tell. A little secrecy with the rest of the world is fine. Just make sure to erase those sex tapes before the housekeeper finds them.
CAPRICORN + SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 22 - DECEMBER 21) The fate of this match rests in your ability to merge your strengths. Sagittarius is the visionary and the starry-eyed optimist; Capricorn is the master architect and builder, the ultimate realist. You each excel where the other is weak, and you make excellent business partners. However, your values and lifestyles can be vastly different, complicating romance. It's like the class clown dating the class president—an odd couple indeed. To Sagittarius, it's fascinating that anyone could possess such restraint. Stoic Capricorn cracks hard-won smiles at Sagittarius' antics and amusing insights. Yet, Sag optimism soon clashes with Cap pessimism, and here's where you reach your impasse. Restless Sagittarius needs a playmate to dream and scheme, but cautious Cappy shoots holes in the Archer's impetuous ideas, pointing out the foundational flaws. Yet, it's that grim, unvarnished realism that saves the day in a crisis. While Sagittarius freaks out and lapses into denial, Earthy Capricorn holds a powerful, Zenlike acceptance of "what is." Love truly blooms when you make it through a dire breakdown and realize your incredible teamwork turned the ship around. For the long haul, independent Sag must allow Capricorn to be the rock, and the Goat must learn to take a few more bold personal risks.
CAPRICORN + CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 22 - JANUARY 19) Two ambitious Capricorns are on a lifelong mission to get ahead. If you can reach the brass ring faster by teaming up, then why not? You certainly admire each other's unflagging determination and crafty tactics—and you apply your business savvy to courtship, much like a game of chess. Name-dropping is akin to sexual banter for your sign, and "getting into the VIP section" sounds like a kinky metaphor. In a way, it is. You're titillated by power and yearn to be part of the elite. Sure, it may sound cold and calculating, but by nature you're a goal-oriented sign who lives by a long-term plan. Thus, your mate must fit neatly into the picture. You're a pair of workaholics with a closet kinky streak, and if you can leave the office before midnight, you'll enjoy a lusty connection behind closed doors. At the same time, you cleave strongly to time-honored tradition and remain loyal to your childhood friends for life. Parental approval and proper stock is a must. No matter how much you love someone, if he/she doesn't fit into the family dynasty, it's a deal breaker.
CAPRICORN + AQUARIUS (JANUARY 20 - FEBRUARY 18) This is the match of the traditionalist and the rebel, the rule-maker and the rule-breaker. Capricorn is the guardian of history, and Aquarius is an innovator who has little regard for the past. If you can meet somewhere in the present, it's sure to be interesting. Disciplined Capricorn can teach Aquarius the value of structure, and Aquarius can help Cap think outside the box. You're both competitive and controlling in your own ways, and few signs can rival your work shared work ethic. The wheeler-dealer light never switches off in either of you—you'll hand out business cards at a funeral. Still, you might be better off as professional partners, since your bedside manner is so different. Lusty Capricorn may be aloof in public, but this sensual Earth sign is a bona fide freak in the sheets. Although Aquarius may love to shock people in public, behind closed doors your interest in sex can be tepid at best. (As the ruler of electricity, gadgets may be preferable.) Socially, Capricorn can be cold or snobbish, choosing friends based on status. Popular Aquarius befriends everyone—don't be surprised if the Chinese food delivery guy ends up at the dinner table sharing your Hunan chicken. Still, Capricorn can be an important grounding force for Air-sign Aquarius, preventing you from floating off into the ether. Life is never dull with an unpredictable Aquarian.
CAPRICORN + PISCES (FEBRUARY 19 - MARCH 20) On the surface, you might seem like an odd match—imagine a Harvard MBA in Armani dating a paint-splattered artist in Oshkosh. Yet, your signs pair well, even if you don't want to admit it. With classic good looks and a dutiful nature, Capricorn fits neatly into the system. Pisces is a flowy Fish who excels at playing the the artsy rebel, the indie darling, the adorable mess. By comparison, Capricorn seems structured and regimented—but appearances deceive. While Pisces may delight in coloring outside the neat lines Capricorn draws, the real surprise is that Capricorn is the bigger freak behind closed doors. Capricorn has a dominant, even cruel streak that can play out in the bedroom (not that submissive Pisces doth protest). Leather, whips and kinky fun—it's all fair game. You both love to find lesser-known wine, music, and art, a pride yourself on having cultivated tastes. Together, you can traverse the tony uptown spaces to the lowbrow dives, discovering cultural jewels wherever you go. Your diverse strengths could make you great business partners, too. Open a gallery, with Pisces as curator and Capricorn as financial backer.
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firstginger · 5 years
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types of people: d&d races
aarakocra » snowcapped mountains, finding shapes in clouds, fashion conscious, meditation, wanting to see the world, good singing voice, family pictures, expensive jewelry, easily irritated, asking too many questions, molted feathers, flowing clothing, talking with hands
aasimar » prep school, questioning people’s intentions, champagne flutes, dream journals, shiny hair, passionate speeches, sunrises, always following rules, heeled boots, family heirlooms, sitting by the fireplace in winter, rose gold, never changes their mind, teacher’s pet
centaur » leather belts, wine tipsy, mediator, sitting around the campfire, silent treatment, hair in your face from the wind, family reunions, morning jogs, group texts, roasted nuts, never admitting they were wrong, old soul, lazy handwriting, rising with the sun
dragonborn » all or nothing, gold leafing, mesmerized by flames, rib bones, keeping your chin up, misty mornings, pocket full of spare change, painted faces, amulets, hot temper, banners in the wind, biting their tongue, horoscopes, autumn leaves, never letting them see you cry
dwarf » working with their hands, tapestries, messy hair, standing up for what’s right, brands in leather, gemstone jewelry, saving for a rainy day, mulled cider, dirt beneath fingernails, belly laughs, pine trees, pros and cons lists, not shaving, muddy boots by the door, oak furniture
elf » never responding to texts, cat naps, ballet shoes, sunlight on water, practicing until their fingers bleed, braided ponytails, quail eggs, tunnel vision, grass between toes, high expectations, photographic memory, starting an etsy store, bells on ribbons, cursive handwriting
fey » indie music, leather jackets, pranks, flirting to get their way, dragonfly wings, bath bombs, social chameleon, cutting corners, birds on telephone wires, karma, playing devil’s advocate, lipstick kisses, gumdrops, changing moods, pressed flowers, tattoo art, bright clothing
genasi » mood swings, head in the clouds, confident laughter, wild child, shelf of trophies, beat of their own drum, drive thrus, crazy schemes, finger guns, wife beaters, collectables, comebacks, sunglasses on indoors, slogans, bragging rights, cult classic movies, large headphones
giantkin » back of the classroom, gangly limbs, pulling petals from flowers, turtlenecks, feeling like they don’t belong, perfect grammar in texts, sentimental jewelry, loose buttons, skipping stones, saving love letters, passive aggression, bright eyes, staying in pajamas
gnome » cottagecore, flannel shirts, ceramic animals, exploring downtown stores, puns, neighborhood potlucks, honey, broad-brimmed hats, burning tongue on tea, backyard gardens, knitting needles, talking quickly, optimism, finding humor in everything, playful nicknames
goblin » never without their friends, unconventional interests, loud voice, abandoned spaces, chewing nails, gullible comfortable clothing, being afraid to admit mistakes, creative insults, ride or die, untied shoes, ghost hunting, slow to anger but explodes, bruised knuckles
goliath » taking everything as a challenge, team sports, broken bones, competitions, tarnished metal, more sensitive than they seem, younger siblings, going to bed at 8:30, awkward silences, choking on pride, tight hugs, cobblestone pathways, biting off more than they can chew
halfling » card tricks, adventures, cheerleader friend, summer afternoons, following their heart, good luck charms, bursting into song, superstitions, finding the silver linings, keys and locks, day drinking, antique shopping, pretending they know the answer, good vibes only
human » jack of all trades, getting up when they fall, friendship bracelets, history nerd, believing in magic, natural leader, the sound of the city, band-aids on fingers, adventure stories, trying new restaurants, long daydreams, kiss and tell, sarcasm, the feeling of coming home
jackalwere » witty comebacks, chokers, work smarter not harder, feet up on the table, fair weather friend, back of movie theaters, honeyed words, taking challenges, pity parties, neon lights, trying anything once, studded necklaces, dog person, masquerade masks, black nails
kenku » has a vine reference for everything, caving to impulses, taking things apart, talking in circles, snack food, doesn’t read directions, all play and not work, snoozing their alarm, always reorganizing, surprise presents, board games, can’t drive, jumping from one topic to another
merfolk » watercolor paintings, collecting seashells, long nails, lips tasting like salt, the unknown, pounding heart, lace chokers, deep thoughts, wandering soul, sea foam in the wind, dancing alone, sunshowers, collection of lotions, fresh fruit, living one day at a time, strings of pearls
orc » shaving cuts, dropping anything for their friends, unable to sit still, drawing art and showing no one, beef jerky, brass instruments, stubborn as an ox, double knots, thinking too little of yourself, messy bedroom, tangled earbuds, able to nap anywhere, moving fast in relationships
tabaxi » reading wikipedia for fun, bedhead, short attention span, sleeping it off, bite marks, not finishing anything, logic puzzles, curling up with a blanket, sticker collection (but never using them), wallflower, library dates, clean bedsheets, only putting effort into their hobbies
tiefling » tarot cards, candles in the dark, never accepting help, replaced emotions with bad puns, pocket knives, bottling up feelings, long sidewalks, lilies, old books, gender? never heard of her, skull jewelry, ravens at dusk, traditional art, sleeping under a ton of blankets
tortle » restless soul, cozy apartments, potted succulents, handknit socks, packing a picnic lunch, thick skin, sunlight through curtains, collecting coffee mugs, subtle smiles, biting back laughter, watching the rain fall, lazy mornings, supportive texts, peeled oranges, finding a home
yuan-ti » chess pieces, choosing their words carefully, perfect posture, collection of pens, marble statues, formal clothing, paranormal skeptic, taking everything personally, ticking clocks, the taste of iron, eloquent words, leather-bound journals, reading the same book again
race / class
11K notes · View notes
multimentium · 4 years
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𝒕𝒚𝒑𝒆𝒔  𝒐𝒇  𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆  :  𝒅𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒔  𝒂𝒏𝒅  𝒅𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒐𝒏𝒔  𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒆𝒔
adapted  from  this post  !   bold  what definitely applies  to  your  muse. italicize what somewhat applies  to  your  muse. repost  ;  do  NOT  reblog.
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𝓪𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓴𝓸𝓬𝓻𝓪 » snowcapped mountains, finding shapes in clouds, fashion conscious, meditation, wanting to see the world, good singing voice, family pictures, expensive jewelry, easily irritated, asking too many questions, molted feathers, flowing clothing, talking with hands
𝓪𝓪𝓼𝓲𝓶𝓪𝓻 » prep school, questioning people’s intentions, champagne flutes, dream journals, shiny hair, passionate speeches, sunrises, always following rules, heeled boots, family heirlooms, sitting by the fireplace in winter, rose gold, never changes their mind, teacher’s pet
𝓬𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓪𝓾𝓻 » leather belts, wine tipsy, mediator, sitting around the campfire, silent treatment, hair in your face from the wind, family reunions, morning jogs, group texts, roasted nuts, never admitting they were wrong, old soul, lazy handwriting, rising with the sun
𝓭𝓻𝓪𝓰𝓸𝓷𝓫𝓸𝓻𝓷 » all or nothing, gold leafing, mesmerized by flames, rib bones, keeping your chin up, misty mornings, pocket full of spare change, painted faces, amulets, hot temper, banners in the wind, biting their tongue, horoscopes, autumn leaves, never letting them see you cry
𝓭𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓯 » working with their hands, tapestries, messy hair, standing up for what’s right, brands in leather, gemstone jewelry, saving for a rainy day, mulled cider, dirt beneath fingernails, belly laughs, pine trees, pros and cons lists, not shaving, muddy boots by the door, oak furniture
𝓮𝓵𝓯 » never responding to texts, cat naps, ballet shoes, sunlight on water, practicing until their fingers bleed, braided ponytails, quail eggs, tunnel vision, grass between toes, high expectations, photographic memory, starting an etsy store, bells on ribbons, cursive handwriting
𝓯𝓮𝔂 » indie music, leather jackets, pranks, flirting to get their way, dragonfly wings, bath bombs, social chameleon, cutting corners, birds on telephone wires, karma, playing devil’s advocate, lipstick kisses, gumdrops, changing moods, pressed flowers, tattoo art, bright clothing
𝓰𝓮𝓷𝓪𝓼𝓲 » mood swings, head in the clouds, confident laughter, wild child, shelf of trophies, beat of their own drum, drive thrus, crazy schemes, finger guns, wife beaters, collectables, comebacks, sunglasses on indoors, slogans, bragging rights, cult classic movies, large headphones
𝓰𝓲𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓴𝓲𝓷 » back of the classroom, gangly limbs, pulling petals from flowers, turtlenecks, feeling like they don’t belong, perfect grammar in texts, sentimental jewelry, loose buttons, skipping stones, saving love letters, passive aggression, bright eyes, staying in pajamas
𝓰𝓷𝓸𝓶𝓮 » cottagecore, flannel shirts, ceramic animals, exploring downtown stores, puns, neighborhood potlucks, honey, broad-brimmed hats, burning tongue on tea, backyard gardens, knitting needles, talking quickly, optimism, finding humor in everything, playful nicknames
𝓰𝓸𝓫𝓵𝓲𝓷 » never without their friends, unconventional interests, loud voice, abandoned spaces, chewing nails, gullible, comfortable clothing, being afraid to admit mistakes, creative insults, ride or die, untied shoes, ghost hunting, slow to anger but explodes, bruised knuckles
𝓰𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓪𝓽𝓱 » taking everything as a challenge, team sports, broken bones, competitions, tarnished metal, more sensitive than they seem, younger siblings, going to bed at 8:30, awkward silences, choking on pride, tight hugs, cobblestone pathways, biting off more than they can chew
𝓱𝓪𝓵𝓯𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 » card tricks, adventures, cheerleader friend, summer afternoons, following their heart, good luck charms, bursting into song, superstitions, finding the silver linings, keys and locks, day drinking, antique shopping, pretending they know the answer, good vibes only
𝓱𝓾𝓶𝓪𝓷 » jack of all trades, getting up when they fall, friendship bracelets, history nerd, believing in magic, natural leader, the sound of the city, band-aids on fingers, adventure stories, trying new restaurants, long daydreams, kiss and tell, sarcasm, the feeling of coming home
𝓳𝓪𝓬𝓴𝓪𝓵𝔀𝓮𝓻𝓮 » witty comebacks, chokers, work smarter not harder, feet up on the table, fair weather friend, back of movie theaters, honeyed words, taking challenges, pity parties, neon lights, trying anything once, studded necklaces, dog person, masquerade masks, black nails
𝓴𝓮𝓷𝓴𝓾 » has a vine reference for everything, caving to impulses, taking things apart, talking in circles, snack food, doesn’t read directions, all play and not work, snoozing their alarm, always reorganizing, surprise presents, board games, can’t drive, jumping from one topic to another
𝓶𝓮𝓻𝓯𝓸𝓵𝓴 » watercolor paintings, collecting seashells, long nails, lips tasting like salt, the unknown, pounding heart, lace chokers, deep thoughts, wandering soul, sea foam in the wind, dancing alone, sun showers, collection of lotions, fresh fruit, living one day at a time, strings of pearls
𝓸𝓻𝓬 » shaved cuts, dropping anything for their friends, unable to sit still, drawing art and showing no one, beef jerky, brass instruments, stubborn as an ox, double knots, thinking too little of yourself, messy bedroom, tangled earbuds, able to nap anywhere, moving fast in relationships
𝓽𝓪𝓫𝓪𝔁𝓲 » reading wikipedia for fun, bedhead, short attention span, sleeping it off, bite marks, not finishing anything, logic puzzles, curling up with a blanket, sticker collection (but never using them), wallflower, library dates, clean bedsheets, only putting effort into their hobbies
𝓽𝓲𝓮𝓯𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 » tarot cards, candles in the dark, never accepting help, replaced emotions with bad puns, pocket knives, bottling up feelings, long sidewalks, lilies, old books, gender? never heard of her, skull jewelry, ravens at dusk, traditional art, sleeping under a ton of blankets
𝓽𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓵𝓮 » restless soul, cozy apartments, potted succulents, handknit socks, packing a picnic lunch, thick skin, sunlight through curtains, collecting coffee mugs, subtle smiles, biting back laughter, watching the rain fall, lazy mornings, supportive texts, peeled oranges, finding a home
𝔂𝓾𝓪𝓷-𝓽𝓲 » chess pieces, choosing their words carefully, perfect posture, collection of pens, marble statues, formal clothing, paranormal skeptic, taking everything personally, ticking clocks, the taste of iron, eloquent words, leather-bound journals, reading the same book again
Tagged by: @seaprofound​ ( ty boo !! ) Tagging: @wandofwillow​ / @wanderingwolfwitcher​ / @vandbaerer​ / @xchxsingcxrsx​ / @vezely​ / @xqueenofscots​ / @warhornofgondor​
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metalbatandzenko · 4 years
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All the colors!!
Link to the original post so you can reblog it yourself :)
zinc white: how are you really feeling today? no one-word answers please!
Better now than I was the first time I answered this because I got my work done, but still pretty burnt out.
cadmium yellow: when you think of the word “happy” what’s the first thing that comes to mind?
Writing.
lemon: what’s your comfort food?
Homemade fried rice is my go to.
hansa yellow: what’s your guilty pleasure song?
I mentioned previously that I don’t really have a guilty pleasure song bc I’m pretty open about all the music I listen to, but one song I will scream out is Take On Me by Aha
yellow ochre: name an artist/band whom you just discovered & can’t get enough of!
I didn’t just discover her, but Tanerélle...her music is so good and she’s so hot..I’m gay
naples yellow: where do you feel most at home?
San Jose’s Japantown on the weekend of Obon.
raw sienna: with whom do you feel most at home?
With my closest friends.
golden ochre: describe the relationship you have with your closest friend.
I don’t think I have a “closest” friend, but my relationship with my group is pretty casual. We send each other things that remind us of one another, we joke and have fun together but we’re there for one another...I’d trust them with my life.
golden deep: what’s your favorite season?
Over the Garden Wall Season Fall. I love the crispness in the air, the colors, the foods...it’s all so good.
cadmium orange: what do you like to do on your days off?
I write so much. I honestly can’t remember my last day off.
orange lake: do you have anyone you can turn to when you’re sad?
I think so. I always worry that I’m putting too much on someone but I also trust my friends to assert their boundaries when they need it.
titans: do you prefer slow mornings or relaxing evenings?
Relaxing evenings. But I’ll take quiet mornings over both of them.
shakhnazaryan red: are you currently binge-watching anything?
Nope. I might rewatch otgw though.
red ochre: are you more right-brained (creative) or left-brained (analytical)?
My dad would say left brained, my mom would say right brained. I agree with my mom.
burnt sienna: is there a painting that brings you peace when you look at it?
Vincent Van Gogh’s Starry Night. Both the more famous one and Starry Night over the Rhône:
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english red: what animal do you relate to most?
Owls.
vermilion: what’s your favorite accent?
I grew up listening to and speaking Hawaiian Pidgin at home. I’ve lost the language, but hearing it soothes me.
cadmium red: do you have a “type” when it comes to a significant other?
Tall dark and handsome Capricorns regardless of gender. I’ve dated three people who fit this profile and liked seven others. I didn’t know any of them were Capricorn’s until after I liked them.
scarlet: describe your current crush/es.
I actually don’t have one. Unless you count the celeb crush I have on one of my mutuals on twitter akdbrbrb
ruby: what does your ideal first date look like?
Honestly I like lowkey, so probably a coffee shop date or doing something fun like bowling. Maybe if the first activity goes well we can hit a museum or botanical garden then get a quick bite (like in’n’out) after. God I’m so stereotypical skfbrbr
carmine: what does your ideal second date look like?
Definitely a botanical garden or museum if we haven’t already, then a slightly nicer dinner. This is not a high standard. A Chili’s counts.
madder lake red: would you ever kiss someone (or accept a kiss) on a first date?
I mean. I have in the past so. Akdbrbvtbr I’ve kissed people I haven’t even been dating nor interested in romantically! It’s 2020 lemme kiss my friends!
rose: what’s something really positive going on in your life right now?
Honestly Hidden Horns. It’s been so much fun to work on.
quinacridone rose: what’s something you’re really looking forward to?
Seeing my friends and family again. On top of everything going on right now, I live in a different state than my friends and extended family. I miss them.
violet rose: what does your dream house look like?
Not too large. Something with a bedroom for me and my significant other, a guest bedroom, a nice bathroom and a very nice kitchen. Ideally something with a nice view and large windows where I could watch the sun rise and set.
violet: is there any place in particular you’d like to settle down?
Honestly I’d love to move back to California somewhere. Either somewhere near my hometown, or in Southern California
blue lake: what would you like to do/accomplish before you settle down?
I’d like to publish a book to be honest.
cobalt blue spectral: what is the most beautiful place you have ever been to?
I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to go to Japan on a trip sponsored by the Japanese government. Words really cannot describe how beautiful Japan is.
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The first picture is of Odaiba, in Tokyo. The second row is from a small fishing town in Hokkaido. Those are the only picture I had of it that didn’t have a ton of people in them.
The last picture is from the 45th floor of the Tokyo Metropolitan Building in Shinjuku Tokyo. The picture doesn’t do it justice. For how bright the lights were, the stars were out in full force. It was hard to tell where the buildings ended and the sky began.
ultramarine: when was the last time you were in a good mood? do you know/remember what sparked it?
Earlier this evening my dog played with three other dogs.
blue: what’s the most recent dream you remember?
I was choking last night. That’s all I remember.
bright blue: what does your dream family look like? any kids or pets? how many of each?
I’m married to my lovely wife, and we have two kids, a boy and a girl. We also have a dog named Meatball.
blue cobalt: do you like your name? would you give yourself a different name if you could?
My mom chose my name and my brother chose my American name based off a character in an kid’s show. I wouldn’t change them for the world.
prussian azure: what’s your favorite scent?
Fresh bread, the smell before and after it rains, redwood, cinnamon, lavender.
azure blue: what’s your favorite type of tea, if any?
I grew up on genmaicha. It’s a type of green tea that’s brewed with roasted brown rice, which mellows out the bitterness and adds an earthy flavor.
turquoise blue: if you could start a garden, what would you plant?
Snapdragons definitely. They’re my favorite flower. Probably some tulips, gardenias, carnations, violas and lavender as well. For herbs, peppermint, basil, thyme and chives. And probably an apple tree.
cerulean blue: if you were guaranteed to have a viewership, would you start a youtube vlog?
I mean it’s a form of income so I’d be down.
glauconite: describe your body without using any negative adjectives.
I’m tall and broad shouldered, with a long torso and long arms. I’m a bit busty. I’ve got violin hips, strong calves, and solid thighs. I walk on my toes. I have high cheekbones, pursed lips, and almond eyes framed with long lashes.
yellow green: picture yourself walking in a field. what do you see & hear in this scenario?
I’m on a rolling hill of wild grass and wildflowers. The grass shimmers and ripples like the surface of the sea in the breeze. Through it, I see a blanket laid out under a California Oak tree. I can hear the wind, and birds in the distance.
green light: are you in a comfortable place in life? if not, what do you think might make it better?
Kind of? I’m stable enough bc I’m living with my parents, but I’m also closeted. I’m hoping to move out soon.
green: name three countries you want to visit; do you have any actual plans in place to visit any of them?
I’d love to go back to Japan, see New Zealand and visit the Basque Country in Spain. I don’t have any plans to though, I don’t have money for that.
emerald green: do you speak any languages besides english? are there any additional languages you want to learn?
My grasp on Japanese is pathetic and I’ve lost my pidgin. I’d love to regain them.
oxide of chromium: what’s your favorite book?
Chronicles of Prythian.
olive green: are you currently reading anything? how do you like it so far?
The Shape Of Water by Lidia Yuknavitch. It’s so painful but cathartic.
mars brown: what’s a movie that always puts a smile on your face/makes you laugh?
Emperor’s New Groove!
burnt umber: what’s something you plan to do before the day is over to take care of yourself?
Sleep.
umber: have you drank enough water today?
...no
voronezhskaya black: what or who is your go-to outlet for when you need to vent?
Either a friend or my second twitter ajdbfb
sepia: name five things that always make you happy.
Seeing my friends.
People commenting on my writing.
Seeing people like things I made for them.
Watching Lilo and Stitch.
Listening to my shitty nostalgia playlist.
indigo: what’s the best/sweetest compliment you have ever received?
I mentioned this before but my professor and mentor figure described me to her colleague as “fast to laugh, even faster to smile”. I also had someone tell me I had a genuine gift for writing and that my piece moved them to tears after they read a Nonfiction piece I wrote.
payne’s gray: describe your aesthetic?
Something out of a Hozier song. Things being reclaimed by nature. Earth tones. Misty forests. Knives. Ornate clothing.
Alternately: young hot suburban dad who all the moms have a crush on.
black: post a selfie because you are so beautiful!
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