*Drops w.i.p of the next chapter of the Trials of Loki AU here*
Whoops
[Chapter one here for anyone interested]
------
I woke up in a really soft bed with a sword over my head, an elf pointing runes at me menacingly, one of my spawn scowling at me, and a dwarf pointing a harpoon at my face.
So basically a typical Saturday morning for me.
"Good morning," I said casually, gently pushing the harpoon away from my face with the tip of my finger. "Or is it evening? How long have I been out? And get that out of my face, please."
"I thought you were in the walnut!" Alex yelled accusingly, as if it was my fault I wasn't in a walnut. Why would I even be in a walnut?
"Don't point at me, Alex; it's rude. And, can't a mother just want to spend quality time with their favourite daughter or son?"
Alex was, in fact, not my favourite daughter or son, living or dead, but Alex did not need to know that.
"Quality time? You tried to kill us!" Alex snapped. "And it's son today, mom."
He said Mom like a swear.
"Oh, build a bridge, son! You're already dead!" I snapped back, saying son the same way he said mom. Which, looking back, was probably not the right thing to do or say in that situation.
"Señor, permission to stab him?" Magnus's sword, Sumarbrander—or Jack, as he prefers—asked above my head.
"Yes," Alex said.
The elf signed, "Yes."
"Please do." The dwarf agreed.
"Not yet," Magnus said.
I crossed my arms before uncrossing them because, ouch, my ribs were still broken. "I claim guest rights."
See, guest rights and host rights are very important to Norse demigods (and most Jotun and gods, too). Long story short, they can't express the intent to harm me unless I try to kill them first, and vice versa. Because it's considered rude.
Of course, I'm not most Jotun. I'm not considered a god anymore, also I don't really care about rudeness. So, if the roles were reversed, I'd kill them in a heartbeat.
But they don't need to know that.
"That's bullshit!" Alex yelled, "He'll stab us in the back the moment we take our eyes off him!"
"Sorry, dude, that's the rules," Jack said, flying to his master's side. "He has to admit his intent first." If he had shoulders, he probably would have shrugged.
"Thank you, Jack; I'm glad someone around here is polite," I said. "Now, I will tell you why I'm here—" My ribs gave a sickening crunch as I tried to sit up. I whimpered, hoping that'd garner me some sympathy.
Of course, they (Alex, especially) were heartless and just stared at me, waiting for my explanation.
I glared at them, "What? Not even gonna offer to heal me?"
They stared at me in silence.
"Fine," I grumbled, realizing I wasn't going to get any help from them. "I'll just sit here in agony while I explain."
7 notes
·
View notes
@runest0nes how does it feel to know you’re in my sketchbook? You are on the 4th page, sketched by a fellow wizard during 7th period art class with a mechanical pencil containing 7mm graphite and the power of adhd hyperfixation.
15 notes
·
View notes
Reading hammmer of thor and we got to Hearth's house and um..
ALDERMAN IS SO FUCKING MEAN
@catsaresassy22 I KNOW YOU SAID HE WAS AN ASSHOLE BUT GODS ABOVE AND BELOW.
Its like he's trying to speedrun being a dick to as many groups as he can.
He's already racist, ableist and probably homophobic too.
I wanna bite him. Not in a cute 'he's my blorbo' way but in a vicious 'I want his blood to stain my teeth like sweet pomegranate juice' way.
Also Blitzstone (is that the ship name?) seriously Rick they better become a couple.
6 notes
·
View notes