#maybe then I'd do my stories.... lol who am I kidding

[il-miele-che-scrive]

Go for his brother part 2

Part 1 here

Part 3 here

username1 DOUBLE BETRAYAL 😭

↳username2 wdym bro wtf Arthur is just getting his karma, he CHEATED on Y/n with her best friend

↳username2 and Y/n only got with his brother after the breakup

username3 It's so crazy to me how not long ago Y/n was with Arthur at Charles' race and we could see them all lovey dovey and now she's with Charles 💀

username4 I hope they actually like each other and it's not just something Y/n schemed to get back at Arthur

↳username5 And even if it is, so what? Both Leclercs deserve this if she's doing it for the sake of revenge

username4 What did Charles ever do to you 😭 he's a literal pookie

username6 I am BEGGING to find out Arthur's reaction

username7 I wanna see this on Drive To Survive lmao

↳username8 The most interesting thing in the whole season lol

username9 Exactly! Men driving in circles? Nah, fuck that, give me family drama

yourusername The Art & The Artist

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charles_leclerc I took way more than these 2 pictures, should post them all

↳yourusername some would get me banned🤭

username1 MY OH MY

username2 What did she say 😐

username3 I'm jealous but haven't decided if I want him or her

username4 Arthur better not read this comment section (I hope he will)

francisca.cgomes Thanks for blessing my eyes 🫶

↳yourusername You're welcome bestie🫶

username4 it's so nice to see Y/n found a friend who won't steal her bf

username5 You can't be sure, it's Charles Leclerc we're talking about. You think he wouldn't go for his best friends' girlfriend who is now his own girlfriends' best friend after pulling what he's just pulled?

username4 ngl girl I got lost in whatever you're saying

yoursister In your iconic girl era ❤️

↳yourusername I slayed didn't I 💅

username6 Honestly guys I believe it's not just a revenge scheme

↳username5 What makes you think that?

username6 Given these pictures and the pictures from the gossip page they look pretty much happy to me, too happy for it to be fake

username5 Whatever you say, we'll see. They have to get tired of pretending one day

exbestfriend Glowing ✨🩷

↳yourusername 😐

↳francisca.cgomes 😐

↳yoursister 😐

↳charles_leclerc 😐

↳pierregasly 😐

↳georgerussell63 😐

↳carmenmmundt 😐

↳alex_albon 😐

↳lilymhe 😐

username7 Y/N AND HER COMMENT SECTION ARE ICONIC 😭

↳username8 I can't stop imagining them having a gc and she sent a screenshot of her ex best friend's comment like "you know what to do, guys" 🤣

username9 I just know Arthur is screaming crying throwing up because LOOK AT WHAT HE LOST

username10 Lol who's next? Toto Wolff?

arthur_leclerc My favorite love story is ours ❤️

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exbestfriend So happy we found each other ❤️❤️

username1 💀

username2 Alright they both have the audacity

username3 your love story is cheating on Y/n lmao

username4 Imagine they have a kid one day who'll ask mom dad how did you meet lol

↳username3 I'd be EMBARRASSED

username5 They deserve each other tbh

username6 Hey but... What if this pic and Y/n's pics were taken on the same day...

↳username7 wdym

username6 Arthur wanted to keep and eye on his ex and his brother from afar 😭

username7 it's terrible but possibly true lmao

exbestfriend I'm so sick of people judging us

↳username2 That's what you deserve, the both of you

↳username4 when actions have consequences:😮

yourusername Back at the paddock ❤️

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username1 At least she didn't downgrade right?

yoursister You guys look so good together

↳yourusername Thank you 🫶 ily

↳charles_leclerc Yes we do 😊

↳username2 Y/s/n never commented anything like this when Y/n used to post with Arthur😭

lilymhe It was nice catching up with you when the boys were playing

↳yourusername maybe next time you and Alex could come over so the boys can play some video games together

username3 Pls they're just two single mothers bonding over their toddlers being besties😭

username4 I NEED TO KNOW IF ARTHUR WAS THERE

↳username5 You crazy? Ofc he wouldn't have come, he's too scared of confrontation

username4 Okay but then what if one day Y/n and Charles get married? Will Arthur just skip his brother's wedding?

username5 I think some time will pass before Charles decides to settle down. And not with Y/n, that's for sure

username6 Why not? Y/n makes a much better couple with Charles than she did with Arthur

username5 Charles would never take her seriously lol she dated his brother, Charles is just having fun with her while letting her have her moment

arthur_leclerc Are you wearing the dress you wore on our first date?

↳username2 SHE'S WHAT?????

↳username3 wtf are u doing here

↳yourusername Maybe...

username4 Mother keeps slaying 😭👏

username7 I aspire to be like Y/n fr

alex_albon Lily said we should have a double date

↳yourusername Let's do it then @/lilymhe @/charles_leclerc when and where

arthur_leclerc I just wonder when will you get bored of this

↳yourusername Bored of what exactly? Going to races? You know I've always enjoyed looking at cars go vroooom

arthur_leclerc You know what I mean

arthur_leclerc Of pretending to like Charles just to prove me some delusional point

yourusername You really think I'd waste my energy on that? It's a funny coincidence indeed, but I do like him actually

arthur_leclerc Mhm sure I give you maybe 6 months more, can't keep pretending forever

charles_leclerc A family gathering & the morning after

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username1 OH GREAT HEAVENS

pierregasly Now that's something none of us expected

↳username2 bro speaking facts

username3 They said fuck you Arthur you'll get a proof we're not pretending😭

username4 Well at least the family already knew her

↳username5 Pascale liked Y/n so much she said girl you have my blessing no matter which one u marry

username3 Guys do you think Arthur was there? You know, it's a family gathering, so he had to be there, right?

alex_albon Charles settling down wasn't on my bingo card this year

↳lilymhe Neither was it on mine but I love it

francisca.cgomes Girl you realize there's no going back now? 😂

↳yourusername I hope so😜🫶

arthur_leclerc I still can't believe how disrespectful you both are

↳charles_leclerc Look who's speaking of being disrespectful

↳yourusername stfu arthur maman literally had to kick you out of the party

username3 The way it used to be "Thurthur" and now it's "stfu arthur" 😶

username2 at least the "maman" is the same right

username5 I feel like Pascale likes Y/n more than she likes Arthur

username7 wtf guys PASCALE HAD TO KICK ARTHUR OUT OF THE PARTY 😭😭

↳username8 That's crazy, imagine how's the wedding gonna look like

carlossainz55 Getting engaged after a few weeks? Is she pregnant?😂

↳username9 Not funny

username10 Chill that's just millennial humour from back when pregnancy outside marriage was a disgrace

↳charles_leclerc We've known each other long enough to make this decision 🫢

carlossainz55 Valid point

arthur_leclerc But for majority of this time she was my girlfriend

charles_leclerc On which you cheated

arthur_leclerc @/yourusername did you use me just to get to Charles? Was it your plan from the beginning?

↳yourusername Sure because I have nothing else to do lmao

↳yourusername We've talked about it yesterday arthur, don't start again

arthur_leclerc I just still can't believe Charles would do something like that to me

yourusername And half a year ago I believed you wouldn't have ever cheated on me

charles_leclerc I said it yesterday and I'll say it again, Arthur I will always love you as a brother, but you messed up big time, you can't be mad at us

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc imagine #f1 smau #f1 social media au #Charles leclerc smau #arthur leclerc x reader #Arthur leclerc smau #Charles leclerc social media au #Arthur leclerc social media au

[crushedsweets]

Would you ever consider including nurse ann in more of your art/ stories? She's one of my favorite characters and I think your design for her is amazing lmao- I'd also sort of like to know what her relationship with the others would be like

yes. actually. i would love to . ok i have some vague ideas for how shed fit into the lore so thatll be under the cut !! i also start rambling about lulus lore too cuz i decided theyre friends.

ok so, again, my au is based around slenders forest being like... some sort of magnet for the paranormal. slenderman wants to keep all of these cryptids within the forest.

since its in a fictionalized forest in tuscaloosa, where marble hornets was filmed, i decided to move the abanonded hospital they visited up north of the tuscaloosa lake. she roams there.

SOOOOO nurse ann is just... a demon. slenders forest is sort of like limbo for a lot of the cryptids and kinda puts them in like.. a long daze and loops unless they're consistently leaving or being grounded by humans.

i dont EXACTLY know why/how she's in that specfic hospital, especially since i dont believe she has an official origin? maybe when the hospital shut down, she was let go and wasn't transferred to work in a new hospital, so she lost her shit and preformed some crazy rituals that ended up making her an undead nurse ? now she's forever roaming the hospital. or maybe she was killing patients when she was a human and kept doing weird demon shit with their bodies and the operator/zalgo fed off of her bad vibes. LOL IDK.

now about lulu cuz i drew her too.

i used to be sooo fond of lulu. and i originally said she was just going to be another ghost roaming the forest pointlessly, mourning everything and being incapable of interacting with humans, BUUUUUT. she is 24 and NOT A GHOST?!?!??!?! IDK WHY ALL THIS TIME I THOUGHT SHE WAS JUST A GHOST WHO AGES CUZ YK HOW CHIBIWORKS STUFF WAS BACK THEN LOL... i def am tired of little kids being tortured and all these children ghosts tho so im kinda glad to have smth new to write. anyway. so im thinking lulus just another little demon thing... i'm thinking her story goes.

she was in strict private schools all of k-12, and went to uni on her own in tuscaloosa. she wanted to branch out, have a little rebelious phase, make friends, etc. tried to join a co-ed frat. she experienced an absolutely horrific hazing when she was like 19, the frat fully believed they killed her by accident and in their panic, tried to bury her in slenders forest, and some demonic entity in the forest infected her before she was buried fully. she ends up climbing out of her shallow grave, never having died. perhaps the operator did it, perhaps zalgo like in her og lore ? PERHAPS ANN CUZ SHES A DEMON HERSELF?

anywaaayyyyy :3 l think theyd be cute friends. they just look really cute together and i could see good chemistry so i totally would love to expand on them and make them friends. maybe expand more on the type of species they are, what kind of powers they have(esp if i make ann the demon who infects lulu).

BUUUUT ALSO this made me realize i should totally look into adding zalgo to my lore. cuz it doesnt make sense for the operator to make anyone a demon, thats not really what he does.... and i dont want him to do that i just dont like the vibes. so mmm yes.

anyway in terms of relationships..

lulu and her are cool good besties beautiful they would take selfies and do tiktok dances together.

masky and hoody are incredibly indifferent to her, because they dont have to worry/visit her often. she stays in the hospital thats in the forest, and thats exactly where slenderman wants her, so theyre content. theyre kinda grateful she keeps lulu in the hospital too, cuz lulu actually freaks them out bc she'll be jumping at them and shit talking about their eyes.

tobys EXTREMELY scared of ghosts (bc of his hallucinations of his sisters ghost . . ). he eventually gets over it(kinda?) with sally, but he keeps accusing ann and lulu and the sort of being ghosts cuz they just.. kinda pop in and out. at least jack has to walk into the room to show up. so he doesnt like them

mmm jack wouldnt like her IF he knows that she kinda turned herself into a demon through like, a ritual or smth. he'd be beyond pissed to know someone CHOSE to be what he is. if he doesnt know, he doesnt care for her. he kinda jokes about 'well why dont YOU be their medic' and shes like 'dont fuckin wanna be'.

jane and liu and kate prob dont know her... kate might but wouldnt care.

jeff would prob think shes hot or some bullshit and nina would be beyond pissed. at first ninas like AHHH SHES SO COOL cuz shes a fangirl at heart, but the second she hears a single 'goddamn' from jeff shes livid.

ben prob wouldnt care much for her... hes so uninterested in demons idk why i just feel like he doesnt care.

clockwork would LOVE HER. she'd think she's so fucking cool. she'd try talking to her all the time but ann prob wouldnt be interested in clocky at all...

ofc the proxies purposefully come into contact with the paranormal the most because thats their job, so i wrote the most for them, but that doesn't mean theyre the closest or anything.

ok thank u anon you did smth to my brain that benefitted my mental health cuz i love writing this shit for the creeps thank u sm .

#asks #creeped #hcs #sweetart #creepypasta #nurse ann #lulu creepypasta #creepypasta art #creepypasta fanart #creepypasta headcanons #ticci toby #masky #tim wright #aaahhhgghg #i love doing these so much seriously #heals me #toby rogers #Lucille-Tiffany Greatfeild

[tardismyrp]

Turning Out by AJR is so Kristen coded and I love it. (Kind of represents all the Bad Kids in a way, but Kristen specifically) This song can be used to describe her relationships with multiple people.

My analysis if you care 😅:

• Tracker: “Am I ready for love? Or maybe just a best friend. Should there be a difference? Do you have instructions?” Was her love with Tracker what she needed when she was vulnerable and just figuring out who she was?

• Cassandra: “In my mind, I thought the birds would sing and sparks would fly, But it's just quiet. Am I cruel? Or am I ignorant or was I fooled. By the stories I knew?” “I'm a little kid with so much doubt.” Kristen’s relationship with religion has always been rocky once she found out about the harvestmen and how Helio was. There’s no neon sign saying yes (besides the god lol) this is what you should do. She hasn’t had a big ah ha moment like she was expecting.

• Her Parents: “But I'm confused. I thought I'd recognize when love was true. But I'm confused.” “Who can I turn to now? When I'm still turning out.” “I'm a little kid with so much doubt Do you want to be there to see how I turn out?” Kristen finding out the love her parents had for her was conditional on her being the chosen one of helio. Even though they have abandoned her she is still trying to be there for Bucky and even reaching out to her parents (the coffee that hadn’t happened yet)

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #kristen applebees #gorgug thistlespring #adaine abernant #fabian seacaster #fig faeth #riz gukgak #the bad kids #cassandra fantasy high #song analysis #bucky applebees #tracker o'shaughnessey #Spotify

[justatalkingface]

what's your opinion on the big 3? When I was hyperfoxed on this series they were the thing I care Abt the most (I enjoyed season 4, obv I'd change some stuff now but I still remember it being atleast ok)

I hate how dirty they did my girl nejire, as far as I'm aware they didn't even do anything with her after the whole pagent thing she just got a small backstory about how she was sad (don't know all of it I haven't been keeping up that well w the manga)

mirios not having a quirky and having to save eri (a girl who I can't imagine would be that skilled at the age she is and has been training on lizards to give his quirk back all together, I'd imagine it taking a few more months but bnhas time is shit so) and coming back in the war arc to punch one person and then basically do noting iicr

The only decently written one was amajiki, I wish they had more going on I think they have a fun dynamic (w them helping taking care of eri and me rlly liking idk what it's called but I love the fluff it brings) :(

Lots of mixed feelings, in all honesty. Lots of mixed feelings.

I'll admit, a big part of my mixed feelings about them is they showed up as the latest, 'Stomp on Izuku's everything' at the point in the story where it was becoming obvious that there was always something stomping on Izuku, and that gave me a bad first impression on them I've never been able to shake... which isn't helped by how they're connected to the clusterfuck of Nighteye, of all people, which is kind of my whole thing with Mirio (warning; I am biased):

As a person, he's obviously nice, but as a character, basiclly his entire reason for existing was, 'give Izuku an existential crisis' and I don't think I've ever forgiven him for that, really. His entire character is just bigger, stronger, older, happier, more capable, more confident, more successful, more loved Izuku, who had a Quirk his whole life and only had to dig deep to find out how strong it, and he, was all along.

Unironically. It's....

It's a really bad look, to be blunt; he feels kind of like a bad fanfiction character written by a bad writer who wanted to put their super special OC in the story, except he's canon.

Since we've never seen him even think something unheroic, there's really nothing that distinguishes him from that impression factual statement, which, again, makes it hard for me to give a shit about him, or even remember him... which is a problem Hori seems to share, lol. It doesn't help that I loathe Sir Nighteye and that most of his development time is spent admiring him, to boot, and that his parts of the story are either empty or focused on a living plot device I can't quite like no matter how hard I try because of how blatant the emotional manipulation is about the biggest story breaking, SOD shattering plot device until Stars and Stripes showed up.

If he ever got any kind of development to flesh him out a human being rather than being either Izuku and/or a heroic archetype, it'd help, but beyond all of that his biggest personality trait is liking jokes, and that barely even comes up. Or, rather, considering both the Final Arc and his response to Bakugou's name, along with Nighteye's own tendencies, 'jokes', maybe.

He doesn't deserve it, I admit it, it's not his fault, but I just can't get past that. He also doesn't deserve to just be forgotten until his big moment of a butt joke, but... MHA, everyone. In all honesty, I'd just like him better if his entire story arc didn't exist in and as some of the worst parts of the Overhaul arc, but he's tainted by that fact.

I freely admit that I am unfairly biased against him, so take all of that with a mountain of salt.

As a side note though, god, the story doesn't seem to realize how badly Nighteye is using the poor kid; Mirio thinks Nighteye is training him because he's worthy, while Nighteye mainly seems to be doing it because he's the closest thing to an All Might clone he can get, bar him actually cloning All Might, even if he grew to like him for who he is. I'm not sure Nighteye ever thought of Mirio with just his Quirk as anything more than a temporary situation; even at the start of canon, when on his own merits he's rising to fame with how successful he is, Nighteye's overall focus is still about getting AFO into the kid.

I almost wish I could see Nighteye explaining how all of his training came down to getting All Might's Quirk, just to see MIrio react and tear Nighteye down a peg about it, except Hori's history of handling these kinds of things means he'd never be allowed to be properly offended on his own behalf, the poor bastard.

Moving on, Tamaki. Out of all of them, he's had the biggest of an on-screen story arc, and in a intellectual way his Quirk is easily the most interesting. Unfortunately, while he has a personality, it feels so bland at times that he's far easier to remember for his Quirk than who he is.

I liked his story, really, but at the time it was overshadowed by Mirio and his everything, and by the time he showed back up it was clear how irrelevant it and he was, so it was more about how (admittedly, very) cool he get his Quirk to be than it was about him, and with some brutal honesty, it's probably because his Quirk is so interesting that he even got that much focus beyond that initial arc by Hori.

And... Nejirie.

In a combat sense she's easily the best of them, really; Mirio is almost purely defensive, which limits him (especially if he's not surprising someone with it) while Tamaki's Quirk, while flexible, is so conditional in ways that can easily hold him back (we only ever see him fight with full preparation; if he's not gearing for a fight he'd be easy to ambush), and like a lot of things in the Final Arc, his big laser canon thing is.... questionable.

Nejirie, though, is just simply powerful. In a setting where everyone has one power and one main application of that power, where you either fly or blast things, but not both, she's the closest I've seen to a 'traditional' super hero, like you'd see in Marvel or DC.

At the same time, though, out of the three of them she least has a story, for obvious reasons, and it's a disgrace, really. If Hori had just spent some time on her, on the her backstory that apparently exists (yeah, I'm not sure where that is either), she could have been so interesting... but really, all she is is the Girl Teammate. Her personality traits are The Girl Teammate's personality traits. She's just The Girl Teammate stamped over all of the interesting stuff, and it's such a waste, it really is.

And finally, as a unit? The Big Three is a shiny toy that Hori forgot in the corner somewhere as soon as he got bored with it. He spent a few minutes oohing and aahing over them, focusing really hard on developing interesting powers, how they could be used, and how strong they were, only to start to lose interest as soon as those powers were established, and he was writing the three of them off before their introductory arc was even over.

#ask #bnha critical #mha critical #nighteye critical #izuku deserves better #my deeply conflicted feelings on Mirio's everything #he doesn't deserve it but still #he's the true victim of the Overhaul arc #i hate nighteye ever so much #hori's chronic hatred of women #the big three is big wasted potential

[fallloverfic]

Solo Leveling Episode 7 Thoughts

Excellent ep!!! Spoilery thoughts for the anime, novel, and manhwa below, CW: blood:

Jinwoo and Jinah are so cute together T-T I love them being close sibs. I mean obviously he helped essentially raise her since he was 14, when their dad disappeared and their mom was too ill to do everything, and then fully did so after he graduated because their mother was comatose, and I just... think about that a lot. This kid who has to raise another kid and never got to finish being a kid himself and had to immediately go into the workforce and give up going to university and he just wants her to have the opportunities he didn't and I just T-T

I feel like I accidentally am vibing with this because I got fried chicken on the way home from errands today, completely unaware this was going to be in the episode.

I love Jinah asking about him and how he's doing. Makes up for calling him a cheapskate >.< I mean to be fair to her, I grew up in a household that struggled for money and I was completely clueless about why we often didn't get stuff, though my parents really tried to spoil us to the extent they could. I do get it. It's realistic in my experience to react this way, especially when the younger person is kept clueless about finances. It's just T-T sometimes. But I do love that she cares about his mental health.

Jinwoo just processing his first murder(s) essentially alone cause he certainly didn't confide in Jinho and he is the older brother with a sister in high school who is just living a normal life and wants her to be happy and so cannot confide in Jinah and it kills me he kind of doesn't do this with anyone, ever T-T Sort of when the Hunters manager warns him, but not on an emotional level. I mean to be fair he's also kind of just, "I resented them for thinking they had a chance against me," which is pretty dark lol But he's obviously really conflicted about that cause these were humans.

Jinwoo has one goal and that is protecting the people he loves. He's pragmatic. I think it's interesting he doesn't focus as much on "they tried to kill me multiple times, it was self-defense and defense of another person". Just... "My family is what's important and I'd do it again if I have to." Which, yes, that's a consideration you can have.

I mean he "could" have incapacitated the Lizards, maybe, rather than killing them, but he's not trained to do that, lacked equipment for it, and in the moment it's hard to process that. It just bothers me he doesn't really do any actual emergency training or whatever other than just building up muscle, EXP, and fighting/movement skills. Even his healing solution is just... shove a potion in people's mouths and it's unclear if he has literally any training in first aid of any kind outside that time he helps Song Chiyul wrap his arm.

Also Jinwoo is still really cute :3 He's animated well.

Hehe learning about the detox, poor guy lol I honestly do love the detail that the system detects alcohol as a harmful substance. It's fun when stories add it in.

Jinah worried about him drinking too much T-T They love each other T-T I love themmm

(just skip down three paragraphs if you don't care about my rant about cellphones lol)

One criticism I have because I always focus on the appearance or absence of mobile phones in modern stories where they should be there: the novel focuses a decent amount on how Jinwoo's cellphone broke in the double dungeon, and he has to get a replacement specifically from the Korean Hunter's Association, and that is completely absent from both the manhwa and the anime, and the anime is compensating weirdly. The novel explains, "Hunter-issue smartphones used specialized technology, so Jinwoo had to put in a request directly with the association." (Vol 1, Chapter 4). So the phone does more than just allowing the Hunter's Association easy access to hunters (I think at one point it's shown it works inside the dungeons, when most technology does not, so I imagine it's powered somehow by mana/essence stones). Jinwoo doesn't have the money to speed up the process, so he has to wait for multiple weeks for them to provide him with a new one, and he forgets to take care of it until I think after he's out of the hospital, so that puts off the process even longer. This means: the association cannot contact him except via landline, and anyone with his cell number cannot do so either, unless, presumably, they have his landline number. In the novel, Jinwoo demands an explanation from Jinho for how Jinho has the number on the presumed landline (it's just called "phone" in the Yen press English translation, I don't know why he wouldn't have his cellphone if he has one in the anime outside his bedroom where Jinah is, and I can't imagine Jinho getting Jinah's cell number, or why the Association would have it other than maybe as an emergency contact, which, again, why would he get that number and I feel like Jinwoo would kill him if he did lol), and Jinho explains that he knows someone at the Association.

Most of this revolves initially around various people trying to contact Jinwoo during this non-cellphone time and not getting to him because he literally does not have a phone and, presumably, they don't have his landline number. The nurse whose number he got tries to contact him via his mobile and nearly gives up by the time he gets his phone back to see her messages. Like many related subplots, this is also part of showing that Jinwoo is just... bad at keeping in touch with people lol (I mean he explains, sadly, in the novel, "No one ever calls me anyway." (Vol 1, Chapter 4). But he gave this woman his number and ultimately decides to ignore her/not respond when he sees all the messages she sent him rather than saying literally anything like, "Sorry I was out of touch" or whatever, or just politely turning her down. He does this for most people: most of his interaction with his cellphone is to decide not to use it lol I can see why the manhwa dropped this plot nearly entirely (except for a later modification, which I really like) because it feels clunky. But it creates this weird scenario where... it's South Korea, Jinwoo doesn't have a ton of money but he's doing fine-ish enough to have a giant TV and a computer, and he needs his phone for work. Phones and mobile phones in particular exist in the anime (e.g., we see Woo Jinchul use one, Dongsoo crushes one). So one would ask: why does he not have a cellphone (and when/how did Jinho get his number)? And unrelated: why doesn't his email almost ever get used? The webnovel released in 2016, both would have been commonplace things then; I mean the guy goes onto a forum to ask if other people have leveled up in the novel; it would have been a lot simpler to have Jinho send him an email, though I guess I appreciate the added Jinwoo & Jinah bonding created by keeping this to some extent.

It doesn't ultimately matter in the grand scheme of things. It was really one of the weaker elements of the story and it's really incredibly minor. I can, again, see why the manhwa dropped it and why the anime is side-stepping it when considering what to adapt. But anyway, that was my aside of "how cellphone usage/lack of it when it should be there changes stories". (Also for the record, I think it's good he didn't respond to the nurse, in the end, because that entire plotline is really creepy and probably violates some ethics, but it's also so completely unnecessary).

Jinho pointing out the fight with the Lizards was self-defense :3 Good!

The "this cafe sells coffee" glamour shots are making me laugh, I don't know why lol

One thing that's always intrigued me with this series, and I don't know if this is common to the genre or something, maybe it is, is how much buildings are used as collateral. Like it is a simple truth that buildings are a very core part of value for wealthy people and organizations. Real estate is where big money is made. A lot of people in power literally control large chunks of your local real estate. But a similar story would probably just say like... "I can wire x money to you as needed". Instead this just upfront goes, "I'm rich, but here's this really big money item you could have: a building." It's just neat.

O.o Jinwoo doesn't take Jinho's offer. That's interesting. He does take the offer in both the novel and the manhwa, so I'm unsure about why the change? Maybe it combines into his realization that he needs to level up to face enemies past Cerberus and Jinho is a convenient way to do that.

Dongsoo's Japanese voice actor (Junichi Suwabe) has too pretty a voice for Dongsoo alkdjaldja Like he sounds unfairly beautiful aldkjalalkj (Unsurprising for the guy who voiced Viktor in Yuri on Ice) I don't precisely know what I expected him to sound like, and I'd love to see who they picked for the Korean dub, but alkdjal dang. To be fair... he did also voice Jaeha in Yona of the Dawn, and Grimmjow in Bleach, so I'm not that surprised the actor sounds good... I just. Wow. Salud. I don't know that this works for Dongsoo (at least for me) but he does at least sometimes play annoying dudes lol (I love you Jaeha and Grimmjow, and Viktor and Oda, but still aldkjalj).

Stop fatshaming your sister Jinwoo. You deserved that kick even if you did not at all feel it.

Bonding time ruined T-T

The way the buttons on the system get clicked is such a satisfying look/sound.

O.O oh, Jinwoo's learning about the Elixir of Life way early. That's intriguing! In the novel and manhwa he doesn't learn until way later. The anime is really focusing overall on making his goal centrally about caring for his family rather than more about improvement for the sake of improvement (I mean in the novel it feels kind of like 60/40 trade-off with the former being improvement). I get why the change: it makes him more sympathetic. And it also makes him look less strange for trying this difficult dungeon early, and for why he focuses so hard on getting back to it, even before he knew about the elixir. Also gives him a solid goal for season 2.

The gentle piano is lovely, and really sets the mood well. Jinwoo has a lot on the line: his mother's health, caring for his sister, beyond his own survival. The juxtaposition is really good.

As someone who loves Greek myths, I have seen a lot of designs for Cerberus (I have two plushie three-headed dogs, including the Cerberus from Hades the video game). Can't say I'm a fan of this design lol It's fine. It's functional. It's a very good remake of the manhwa design. I guess it just... didn't look as eh. It moves well and works, and the team did a good job. I think just... seeing more of it highlights how I really don't care for the design lol Dubu/the team were really good at designing some monsters, but not others.

The fight is really amazing and well-paced, though. Though it's an interesting change that the system is the one reminding Jinwoo about the gland during this fight, rather than him doing it on his own (he figures it out after discovering the detox in both the novel and manhwa). I like him making the connection on his own. Jinwoo can be a little thick a lot, but he is pretty intelligent, and that was one of his smarter moments. Ah well.

Will never get tired of his eyes glowing in shots. His wounds steaming as they heal is also a neat effect.

He's getting the Elixir of Life recipe early too :3 That makes sense. Would be weird if they bring that up early and don't reference it again for... goodness I don't even know that they'll come back to it before the season ends. I don't think we will, because I wouldn't be surprised if the season ends with the Igris fight. But it gives something to look forward to for maybe season 2.

Also he gets the dog collar :3 BUT... like the manhwa we don't see him put it on lol In the novel he's really nervous about people seeing him wear it, but canonically speaking, particularly since he never seems to take his armor off other than to exchange it for improved gear, he puts this on and wears an invisible dog collar through a good chunk of the story (until he gets a better neckpiece) lol Love it. Ah well. Would have been funny to see animated but they are generally sticking to the manhwa, so. It would be funny if I was proven wrong <.< Have him put on the collar, anime!!

All in all, a really good episode, with some great animation, some more lovely music, and some lovely moments between Jinwoo and Jinah. This continues the trend of modifying stuff in interesting ways. Looking forward to episode 8!

More episode thoughts:

S01E05

S01E06

S01E07 (you are here)

S01E08

S01E09

S01E10

S01E11

S01E12

#solo leveling #solo leveling spoilers #sung jinwoo #yoo jinho #woo jinchul #great episode #fallfthoughts #sung jinah #hwang dongsoo #나 혼자만 레벨업

[pikapeppa]

15 questions for 15 friends

Tagged by @elveny and @johaerys-writes -- thank you, my loves!

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? My mom. Apparently my dad really wanted to name me after my mom and she was like "ugh really fine" LOL. My dad is also named after his dad, who was named after his dad... REAL ORIGINAL. This is going to sound like a total humblebrag, but my mom and I are both published academic authors, so we have to use our middle initials to distinguish who published what 🙃

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Probably in therapy last Thursday LOL. Though I got a little prickly-eyed earlier this week watching the episode of ATLA where Zuko and Aang go on their lifechanging field trip to the Sun Warriors' secret village 😂❤

DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Nope! Childless by choice.

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED? I played T-ball when I was 5 or 6 (hated it, cried so much that my parents pulled me out LMAO) and I was on the volleyball team in Grade 6. I'm left-handed and I had a habit of serving into the wall, unfortunately, and the habit got worse when I was nervous. During one game, they took pity on me so much that they paused the game until I got the ball over the net. I was fucking humiliated and have never played a team sport since then. 🤣💀 Re: other physical activities, I like dancing! I've taken a ton of different kinds of dance classes including swing, salsa, bellydancing, and Bollywood dancing, and loved all of them!

DO YOU USE SARCASM? No. Me? Never. 🙃🤣 Forreal though yes. All the time.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Uh...! I don't know if there's any one specific thing? I usually take in an "overall impression" of appearance. Vague, but that's all I've got. If the question was "what's the first thing you notice in people you're attracted to", that might be a different story 🤣

WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOUR? Brown.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? I am going to copy Johaerys's answer and say it doesn't matter to me, as long as the story was good. But also, who says scary movies/horror media can't have happy endings?? 🤣Haunting of Hill House, anyone? (Bittersweet, maybe, but it counts as happy to me!)

ANY TALENTS? Would it be wretched if I said I feel like writing might be a talent? Whatever, I'm saying it. 🤣😅

WHERE WERE YOU BORN? In a hospital in the same city where I currently live! Which I will chose not to reveal openly! 🤣

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES? Writing! It takes up a solid 75-90% of my free time. Also gaming (which I might count into the writing time since it often becomes Research™ for the writing 🤣). I also enjoy baking and cooking, though I don't know that I'd count those as hobbies since they're necessary ADLs?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? A cat named Meeko. She is my daemon. We can never be apart when I am home. Case in point, a photo taken in real-time while completing this quiz:

HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5'3".

FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? Uhhh... what level of school are we talking here? In undergrad, I took an incredible linguistics/history course about writing systems, and that was probably my favourite class ever. I took a course during undergrad about different schools of psychotherapy that was pretty damned influential too.

DREAM JOB? I also loved Johaerys's answer here: "I don't think there's any sort of job anyone could do in this capitalist hellscape we're all currently living in that would be enjoyable enough to make up for, well... living in a capitalist hellscape." I'm lucky enough to work in the public healthcare system so I'm pretty safe from the worst of capitalism, I guess, though my job (speech-language pathologist) is one I chose more for practicality (certainty of employment) than because I was really passionate about it. If I could do something else and not have to worry about money, I would either want to be a fiction editor, or a sex therapist.

Tagging forward to @ranaspkillnarieth @iamcayc @heroofshield @fantasy-girl974 @hellas-himself @midnightacrobat @alyssalenko @vorchagirl @elinorbard @stuffforthestash @mwasaw @lordofthenerds97 @y0ureviltwin @ladyofthelake91 @perhapsrampancy @cha-mij and genuinely, anyone else who wants to share!!! Tag me so I can spy on your life! 🤣❤

#tag meme #about me #tumblr game

[spectralsleuth]

Now that we're entering into 2024, I'm asking some artists and writers that I follow:

1) What is the one piece you're most proud of from this past year?

2) What are some pieces that you would have liked more people to see? If you can include links, I'd love to go check them out!

3) What were your top three favorite pieces (art, comics, fics, etc) that someone else has made this past year?

(As always, no pressure to respond! Feel free to just ignore, or let me know if you'd rather I not send you these kinds of asks in the future.)

This is such a sweet and fun ask!! Thanks so much! I enjoyed seeing other authors answering this it’s so hype to get it myself.

1. This is hard to answer, because this year I tried to do something different with every fic I posted. When I got a concept I very pointedly didn’t shy away from it because it seemed difficult, or I thought I might be bad at it, so there’s something that makes me proud with each one. IF I HAD TO CHOOSE THOUGH I’m going to cheat and pick two.

What it Will Be I’m proud of this because it fell out of me SO EASY. I felt like the process of writing it was a testament to how hard I’ve been working at improving all year, and it came together very quickly and very well. I’m also proud because I incorporated @heckitall ‘s comic page to base it off of, and I’d never tried writing fic for a visual media like that. It was super fun!

On the OTHER end of the spectrum is Case of the Hidden City vs Lou Jitsu because it is VERY technically and narratively complicated and is by far the most ambitious thing I’ve ever written. It’s very hard, but I am VERY proud because I haven’t QUIT it. It’s not complete yet, but it is a good amount of the way there and I’m excited to finish it. Probably once I’ve recovered from surgery lol.

2. This sounds insincere maybe, but I really am happy with the engagement I get on my fic. I really do write my fic for me, and while I love to make sure as many people who want to read it can find it, at the end of the day I don’t like assigning people homework! I went through my whole works list and scratched my head and really tried to think of there was anything I wanted to plug, and I don’t think there is!

I guess I’ll post my lowest viewed, my Swanatello fic! @tangledinink ‘s AU I’m sure everyone’s familiar with lol. I knew that one would be lower when I posted it, if only because it has prior required reading (Swanatello). But I wrote it mainly because the AU was starting to reach a critical point and I REALLY wanted to write fanfiction of how I fantasized an ending might be, so I could go back and read it for comfort. I love Odette and the lore Kayson made for his AU, so I’ll plug this only because I think some people may have missed it!

3. Three works!! JUST THREE?? AUGH.

little kid with a big death wish

By @remedyturtles ! This made me leak tears the whole way through, so huge CW’s obviously. Not only was it one of the best fics I’ve ever read, but I got the privilege of seeing how talented Rem is behind the scenes a little and saw how they write and work and I really want to emulate them going forward. One of many all timer fics for me, for sure, I’d love to read any original fiction they put out.

The Whispering Forest and Other Tales

By @sroloc--elbisivni and @kithnkin ! I love love LOVE the feudal Japan fusion, the research, and the perfect blend of Usagi Yojimbo’s universe with what the Riseverse would have been like in this era. Even the little segues into what they’re wearing and eating is endlessly fascinating to me. Every single character is written to be the best and most interesting version of that character I could imagine. Theres Leosagi, there’s a PB&J murder mystery, there’s spookiness- AND Raphael Hamato gets wifed up!! WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT? I love people that write a fully fleshed story that could be a standalone universe, without losing ANY of the flavor or humor or narrative of the original source material.

And last is I’m Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now

@tangledinink has such a good grasp of family and writing, and realistic portrayals of what would HONESTLY HAPPEN if you discovered literally any aspect of the ROTTMNT narrative. Not even taking into ACCOUNT the turtle nonsense, how do you unpack a family that’s been devoted to destroying a magic monster and sacrificing themselves, or a Dad that fought in a death match battle royale for over a decade, or a RIVAL CLAN OF NINJA? All the characters are written SO WELL, and Kayson does a fantastic job of never letting the characters or story fall into cliche tropes. Their characters are always super detailed, to the point where I really feel it if they’re hungry or hurt or itchy. Which is a weird thing to point out but they make sure you really FEEL the situation. Also like, turtles in highschool? Body dysphoria? My CO-CEO of Hamato Yoshi???

What a great year!! I had so much fun in fandom this year and made a lot of friends.

#rottmnt #tmnt #ask #friendlyneighborhoodterrapin #there’s so many others i want to mention #fic #fic rec #my fic

[spurgie-cousin]

Sorry if this is a personal ask but as an ex-Christian how do you deal with the paranoia that you might go to hell when you die? I have considered myself agnostic for a while but lately I’ve been feeling like I should go back to Christianity because I am so scared of going to hell but I also feel like I should want to be a Christian for more reasons than that. Have you ever dealt with something like this? How did you handle it? Thanks and I love your blog!

Thank you! And that's a great question. The idea of going to hell got its claws in me deep as a kid so this is something I definitely struggled with even as an adult.

For me, the thing that helpe the most was just completely deconstructing and then reconstructing my idea of spirituality. A big part of that was studying other religions, particularly other types of Christianity but also Judaism, Islam, new age stuff, etc. The idea of hell can vary SO much from denomination to denomination, some believe it's not such a bad place, some believe it's temporary, and some don't even believe in it at all. It really got me thinking about how many ways the Bible can be interpreted and how even if hell was a real thing, maybe my own church's interpretation wasn't even correct. People are imperfect after all and we know religion can attract people who care more about power and control than spirituality. There are so many ways people think about the afterlife, how can I be sure what I was told is any more correct than what my Jewish neighbor, whose religion is even older than mine, believes?

Along those lines, another thing that shifted my perspective was learning that most people's idea of hell as a fiery, torturous underworld was actually not even included in the Bible but invented by a poet and philosopher named Dante Alighieri. Even Biblical scholars consider the poem in question to be complete fiction, but the idea burrowed its way into our collective psyche through other fictional media like movies and stories.

I think another thing that has been really important for me personally is defining my morality outside of the Christian idea of it. Basically sitting down with myself and deciding what few things, if any, I know are almost certainly true about myself, people, the universe etc. One of those things I decided was that despite my flaws, I do not think I am inherently bad (as my church had told me). I know that I do my best to be kind, fair, and always try to be a little better than I was the day before, even on the days I don't do it as well as I'd like. From that perspective, the idea that a supposedly benevolent creator would send me to eternal suffering for breaking a few arbitrary rules starts to feel less and less like the truth. If there is a God and he knows everything about me (and is not a masochist) he knows my heart and intentions.

There's definitely more but this has gotten long lol so I'll stop there for now. I guess the tl;dr of this all would be, to try to reframe your idea of spirituality as a whole. Learning about different kinds of spirituality, doing some serious self-reflection, and being very honest about it will help you do that, which can help you get out of your old ideology's grip. I hope any of that makes sense or can be helpful in some way ❤️ let me know if there's anything I can clear up, if you have other questions, or want to talk about it more

#exvangelical #ex-christian #ex-religious #religion

[gamerbearmira]

HEY

So uh for the giant mermaid au Mostly questions on that new Antonio meet human kid story. If u don't mind 😊

What do the other giant sirens or the madrigals think of the human kid being there, I know pepas cool, but what about the others mainly alma since yknow she hates humans and Isabela, Dolores don't like them either

Why do the giant sirens protect human kids from the adult humans, abuse, danger or just from becoming like them and when they take the kids from the shore, what do they do with them?

What happened in Antonio's pirate incident in the first chapter of the story

Can we see the giant sirens or giant madirgal sirens HUNTING I'd love to see them in action!!!

Also this is just the first part of the we don't talk about Bruno song but for we don't talk about alma lol just how I imagined the lyrics

(Felix) We don't talk about alma nah nah nah

We don't talk about alma~

BUT!

(to Mirabel)

It was your special day

(Augustine) it was your special day~

(Felix) We were getting ready and there wasn't a doubt on our minds

(Augustine) No doubts at all on our minds

(Felix) Alma walks in with a nervous grin

(Augustine) CANDLE 🕯️

(Felix) you telling this story Or am I

(Augustine) I'm sorry amigo go on~ 😎😎

(Felix) Alma says that it was fine

(Augustine) what was her issue?

(Felix) Her worry was the obvious sign

(Augustine) julieta got the tissue

(Felix) It happened at the worst of times

(Augustine) Which is all the time for me but see...

We don't talk about alma nah nah nah

We don't talk about alma~

Ok I'm done lol I love your aus and all your ideas have a good day or night ❤️ 😊

HELLO⁉️⁉️

The other Madrigal actually don’t mind. Typically they’d be wary, especially Alma, but not in the case of a child. Julieta and Pepa especially like to dote on him, and Camilo and Mirabel take him to go play with the other guppies in the grotto. Alma doesn’t hate the idea of him being there. If anything, she’s just nervous about him being around such larger beings, and he’s so small, and she knows that human children are far less usable than guppy children. Isabela and Dolores like him enough, they think he’s cute, and much like Luisa, harmless.

Giant sirens take little kids mostly because they fear the smaller humans will turn into bigger humans. And bigger humans are bad people. So, their logic is, take the kid, and raise the kid like a guppy. That way they can still be safe around humans. Actually, when I first started this AU, there was an idea I had where there was a village on the Encanto Island. So, taking that idea, the kids taken from shore over the course of the years were then placed on the main island of Encanto Islands. There's something of a village there, so there was two communities; the giant siren one, and the human one. The humans were raised by sirens, so they essentially are allies. There's no beef between these specific (special kind of) humans, only outsiders.

Also what happened to pirate. That is entirely up to you <33 I left it pretty open ended, mostly because I didn't have an idea, but I also. Just wanted that cliff hanger. If anything, Antonio likely would've harassed him for more food and ate him out if house and home before dragging him to either the Grotto or the village.

AND LET ALMA LIVE1!!!!11 not but. Def try and play it off but like. Alma was stressing for no reason 😭 Felix ain't gaf, and Agustín was playing along the whole time. Question is who would've asked about Alma??? Like would Mirabel still ask, or is she too busy as the leader and someone else asks. Or maybe just the younger grandkids who don't remember her. Idk.

Glad you love my aus what duh 😨

#my asks #my asks are open #encanto #encanto au #au #encanto alma #encanto mirabel #encanto antonio #encanto isabela #encanto dolores #encanto Pepa #giant siren au

[an-au-blog]

hello again! i have a handful of unclenapped au thoughts for you today!

who is the funniest local that could recognize u!buggy and why is it franky? no but really, my favorite rn is the old skypiean knight but i am eager to hear your thoughts

buggy crying in rayleigh’s arms and not knowing why!!!? TT~TT stooop, it’s too much, i can’t take it!!

now that i’ve heard it, i do prefer your take on buggy deciding post-marineford to lie through his teeth to shanks rather than risk an emperor’s ire. he doesn’t know him! this is a reasonable fear! of course lying to him risks compounding that ire, but buggy getting in over his head is just… how these things go for him. it’s fine! it’s totally fine!

until shanks calls his bluff. oof.

does shanks ever manage to convince buggy to be honest with him about what he remembers, do you think? or to stay on the red force with him, after they see luffy’s 3d2y message? and where do the impel down guys go, if buggy refuses to be their captain? do they pull a barto and go around calling themselves members of the strawhat fleet? galdino i assume goes back to working for crocodile?

xoxo, difan

I can tell you've thought about it lol, I'm happy!

Sorry I take so long to respond but I really wanted to have time to think about some of these.

Idk who the funniest one would be, but when you said Franky I think he'd be so thrilled that he can meet a former Roger crew member. Though (as I think I mentioned in another post) I don't think Buggy would like him very much. He wouldn't dislike him but you know... Franky is way too puppy coded and Buggy is a scared and aggressive stray cat. I can see Franky getting all excited like "Wow, no way! It's you!!!" and Buggy jumps up the nearest tree hissing like a cat.

Maybe it'll be funnier if he doesn't recognize Buggy at first though. He's just lounging on deck after they leave water 7 and Franky just jumps and narrows his eyes to Buggy. The clown is on his toes - this freak is staring at him so intensely that he's ready to jump in the water.

Though I understand if you don't agree with my take and I'd love to hear if you have a different vision! Because honestly I'm not 100% convinced with mine either lol

The skypia knight is honestly so cool and I loved him from the first time we saw him to the last, he is so dear to me! The most interesting and maybe unnoticed recognition, in my opinion would be the big snake thing that I forgot the name of. Imagine: it's attacking everyone but Buggy. No one knows or cares why and maybe Nami tries to use him as a shield but the snake just swoops Buggy to safety and continues.

I'm gonna be honest: out of pure selfishness and self-indulgence I'm saying "yes." Shanks absolutely would convince Buggy to stay with his crew for the 2 years after seeing the message.

I think that after Buggy accidentally snapped and let out all his thoughts and practically had a meltdown in front of him when he confessed that he doesn't remember. Maybe he had a little retreat back into his shell after he calmed down and realized he just exploded on one the emperor of the gawddamned sea, but Shanks started taming him like a scared wild animal. And essentially that's what he is, at that moment... Buggy eventually stops avoiding him and goes back to sleeping in the captain's cabin. At first I imagine that at first he felt safer with the impel down prisoners. As much as he doesn't trust them either, he at least knows he'll be strong enough to fight them enough to run away. If he stays with the emperor, he stands no chance.

It takes him a bit but they become friends again.

Buggy is used to observing people to weigh their intentions but the more he observes the more he realizes that Shanks is honest. He starts understanding what Luffy meant with all the stories about him. And in return Shanks lives talking about Luffy as well. And Buggy loves listening.

I've a feeling that they talk about Luffy until dusk one time. About what a good kid he is, what he did for Buggy and how Shanks sees the new generation of pirates in him. They talk about dreams, and fears and hopes despite the fears. And watch the stars and have a little moment.

And because I hate having good things, Shanks misreads the mood and kind of leans in for a kiss, Buggy leans away and for a second has a "wtf is going on? I don't want this! will he kill me if I don't want this?!" moment and kind of starts shaking. He thinks that that's what Shanks meant by the fact they used to be "friends" and this is what was expected of him. So he tries to lean in and kiss him but Shanks is the one to lean away this time. He realized he messed up and he keeps apologizing to Buggy and telling him he feels like an idiot for not reading the room. That he shouldn't force himself to do anything. And Buggy just starts crying and thanking him because he's the only person outside the strawhat crew who doesn't expect anything from him. Whether on purpose or not. (For example the prisoners expected him to be their leader, his captives expected information he didn't have...)

Shanks is very consented but doesn't want to push him and thinks he'll share when he's ready. And he does. He shares about his painful trauma and the full story of his memory loss and escape a few months later. Shanks had never been more angry, yet full of sorrow in his life.

The impel down prisoners want to follow Buggy but he refuses to lead them. So half of them go back to their homes, some to their families, some start families (like how in the episode there was one guy who said "i wanna go back to my wife and kids" when he got free and then heard that buggy was a roger crewmate and went "who needs a wife and kids when we have buggy!" or something and I thought that was kinda funny) but I like the idea that some of them, even though they were dismissed by Buggy and then again by Luffy after the reunion of the straw hats (yes they followed him), they still count themselves as part of their fleet.

As for Mr. 3, I don't think he would have much of a choice other than going back to Crocodile. I still think he'd made good friends with Buggy. Maybe he could even run away on the same ship he did, but he wouldn't want to be part of the straw hats.

#unclenapped au #shuggy #buggy au #answers #op

[luminae-system]

(Danny, as almost always, speaking)

Venty ramble-ish post of the day under the cut as promised in the update (ended up a long post, sorry)

If anyone wants a quick summary, there is a tldr bolded and green at the bottom! Would love some advice if anyone is nice enough to share their experiences and stuff.

Tw: General negative thinking, obsessive/repetitive thinking, ocd-like tendencies, lots of self-doubt, system doubt/self denial, brief neglect(? Descriptions, brief abuse mention (tell us if we missed something else)

I've been thinking of System Origins (xyz-genic) lately. Something about messy thoughts and obsessive patterns and stuff, our psychiatrist calls it "cow chewing" or something like that (since January, our memory has been shit, sorry).

So. I'm afraid to label us as traumagenic because like, as I mentioned in the notes of a reblog this week, we never went through traditional abuse, we had food and education and shelter and all that good stuff.

Maybe mom was down in the dumps herself, and dad was always away on a buissness trip, not to mention mom having to deal with three kids at the same time... so we never really got enough love and attention. We were loved ofc, and I am grateful for all mom did for us.

But like... her best wasn't enough in many ways, that's why we're in therapy since like 11 and always go off the deep end whenever we try to go long periods without a session (monthly sessions seems to be the stretch/limit). And well, we have more diagnoses than fingers in one hand already, wonderful! So funny! Amazing! /sarcasm

So, anyways, back to the topic. We never really lacked anything, were never abused, and the emotional neglect wasn't thaaat bad and totally not on propose. So... was it enough to form a traumagenic CDD system? Are we really disordered?

I do have emotional amnesia in the rare times we've managed to get someone else to be the main fronter, and we do have some ptsd symptoms but like... we do have a separate ptsd diagnosis bc of my ex-bf (another story/post, bad bad guy) and the childhood ptsd-like symptoms are nowhere in the same level as when we first got the diagnosis of the other ptsd.

And looking at posible diagnosis, Partial DID (pdid) is so so so close to what we experience! That's like, us! Main frontstuck host with other headmates acting as 'advisors' and less fronting and more passive influence and co-conciousness (even if we are monoconcious, it's a bit weird, don't wanna think too hard about it)

But like... I didn't start having "multiple people in my head" until like I was 14. Or atleast being conscious of it I guess. That's way past the age threshold for identity consolidation and thus traumagenic system formation...

So are we "disordered enough" to qualify as a disordered/CDD system? Would we make a mockery of "real" disordered systems to self-diagnose that?

I've been thinking of sharing with our current psychologist. The last one dismissed my concerns and said I was being a hypochondriac (god, it's always that excuse! Even with our physical health, which, yes, another post/story).

I'm scared of being wrong. What if I really am just talking to myself and making a sorta tulpamancy thing on accident? Ofc nothing wrong with that, but it would change our system dynamics a lot.

On the flipside, if we really are a traumagenic system... now what? I doubt there are any specialized psychologists for systems in our town... so yeah. Not sure what we would do after a hypothetical informal/formal diagnosis by our psychologist and/or psychiatrist.

Gosh. This is... a lot. And I tried to be brief. Sorry, and if anyone did read it all, thank you so much for caring about us! (Or being curious I guess lol). I'd love some advice

So, tldr: No abuse, only some emotional neglect on accident. Is it trauma enough for traumagenic? We disordered enough for a diagnosis? What if yes? What if not?

-----------------------

Bonus info for anyone(s) who want to give us advice (thank you!!!!)

System of 3

One front-stuck host and two "advisors"

Daena is a sorta reformed persecutor and sorta trauma holder?

Aelius is our protector (he is taking a long nap/trip somewhere in the brain, miss him)

Danny (me) and Daena are two sides of the same coin, share a lot of traits and stuff even if personality is different, basically like a median system.

Aelius is fully separate from us gals

Dissociation has been very common since we were a very young kid, especially derealization, though depersonalization did happen a lot too. Therapy has helped a lot in terms of grounding

Not much in terms of Amnesia I think? Like, maybe I'm not aware of something, but we do remember our childhood well enough to tell anecdotes and funny stories

We do have emotional amnesia tho, mostly with taking care of the body and household chores (remembering something but like, I did not do that. The memory spawned by itself???)

Uhhh ask for more details if needed!!!

#-Danny #Danny✨️ #// #luminar rambles #pluralgang #tw syscourse #syscourse tw #<- ? (just in case) #luminae system #tw vent #tw spiral #tw spiraling #long post under the cut #pdid #partial did #questioning system #< ? i guess #tw neglect #tw abuse

[incomprehensiblelentils]

@purlturtle tagged me in this, thank you! <3

15 Questions for 15 Friends

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

Not my first name, but my mom got my middle name (Melissa) from a coworker she really admired.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

Ooh...I think it was a couple weeks ago while I was watching the Fantasy High episode where they find the corpses of *SPOILERS* and Kristen does a ritual to free their spirits. I just found that scene very beautiful and touching.

DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

Nope! I'm very excited to be a gay auntie to any of my friends' future kids. And B and I have our dolls (see @saintalectoshomeforwaywardgirls).

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?

I rode horses from ages 8-16 (had to stop bc school got too overwhelming). I toy with the idea of getting back into it as an adult sometimes, because I do miss it.

DO YOU USE SARCASM?

I don't know the meaning of the word. (I know this joke doesn't really work but I couldn't resist)

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

This is a weirdly difficult question - I am hilariously non-observant at times and have had to ask more people than I should if they recently got their hair cut/styled differently. I guess maybe their way of speaking? Not necessarily accent but the cadence and pitch of their voice. Physically I guess it's just their general bulk and/or the way they take up space in the world.

WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOR?

Light brown.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

Depends on my mood honestly! I am dipping my toe into horror films (I generally prefer audio dramas or books/short stories) but sometimes I want a good creepy time. I think generally I will go for happy endings most of the time, but I like horror as a container for my anxiety to go into.

ANY TALENTS?

Writing, I'd like to think! I'm also reasonably good at drawing (mostly animals) and I'm a speedreader. Nothing that's any good for a talent show unfortunately.

WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

In a suburb of Seattle, which happens to have a tiny airport they use to fly in celebrities who come in for the local ComiCon (which is very embarrassing, because that means like, Gwendoline Christie has seen a lot of my shitty hometown).

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

Cosplay, general fandom bullshit (affectionate), reading, writing, and I think my Warrior cats spreadsheets count as a hobby by themselves at this point lmao.

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?

Not yet - we'd like to get cats but shit keeps happening to put it off lol. We love our friends' and parents' animals though!

HOW TALL ARE YOU?

5'3", which I recently found out - I have been saying I'm 5'2" for like a decade and this revelation was kind of destabilizing.

FAVOURITE SUBJECT?

English/Writing.

DREAM JOB?

I think I should be one of the guys making up shitty puns for children's valentines, because I'm way better at coming up with them than the stuff I see every year in stores.

Tagging @toriasimmons @swiftzeldas @jenny-dreadful @emmaswanned @theomenroom @dannypinot @amidalleia @zenithofdork @ben-g99 @areax @dollsome-does-tumblr @mrdistracted @nerdfaerie @afterword @thydungeongal only if you wanna! (also if you see this and you wanna do it count yourself tagged!)

Also stealing purlturtle's genius idea to include this at the end of the post - a version for easy copy-pasting!

15 Questions for 15 Friends ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? DO YOU HAVE KIDS? WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED? DO YOU USE SARCASM? WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOR? SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? ANY TALENTS? WHERE WERE YOU BORN? WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES? DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? HOW TALL ARE YOU? FAVOURITE SUBJECT? DREAM JOB?

#me

[bywayofmemory]

15 Questions for 15 Friends

I was tagged by @starsuncounted, thank you!

(also lol that this assumes I have 15 active followers. I assure you that is not the case.)

are you named after anyone? First name no. My middle name, yes.

when was the last time you cried? No idea because I cry all the time. Seriously, making me cry is no accomplishment at all, sorry to all the filmmakers, authors, fanfic writers, musicians, commercial directors etc who have managed it.

do you have kids? No, thank god. Children are for other people.

what sports do you play/have played? lol.

do you use sarcasm? Yes, as evidenced by my answer to the last question.

what is the first thing you notice about people? Their hair, absolutely. I love a good head of hair.

what's your eye colour? Blue, with central heterochromia (ie they've got a brown ring around the pupil).

scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings! I'm a wuss who doesn't like scary stuff much, though ghosts are okay.

any talents? I'm a decent singer. I write well. I can bake, but that's just following a recipe.

where were you born? In the Great Lakes region of the US.

what are your hobbies? Reading, listening to music, video games, writing.

do you have any pets? No and it makes me sad. My bf has a cat who adores me though!

how tall are you? 5'0". People are often surprised when they realize just how short I am. I'm very fond of high heels.

favourite subject in school? History, easily! It's stories that are (more or less, maybe) real.

dream job? No job is the dream tbh. But I'd have liked to be a fiction editor back when that actually meant something. I'd have been good at it.

Tagging @thatgirlnevershutsup, @siterlas, @iamstartraveller776, @earnmysong, and @galadryels!

#tag game #about me

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Books I’ve read so far in 2023!

Friend me on Goodreads here to follow my more up to date reading journey for the year!

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196. The Alien by K.A. Applegate--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was such an interesting perspective! I wasn't expecting it a few books back and was curious how Applegate would tackle it, especially since we know so little about the character. It definitely added a new pov to the story and I'm excited to see how they are represented in the future after more time has passed and more character development has happened!

I can't say too much because spoilers. But I am genuinely enjoying this series and can't wait to get to the next one!

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197. The Grip Of It by Jac Jemc--⭐️⭐️

If there is one thing this confusing and jarring book did really well, it is the representation of what it might be like to slowly fall into madness. The way the characters worked off each other in their madness and the way the dialogue and chapters worked together to create a choppy and disorienting dialogue was genius.

What wasn't so genius was how confused I was most of the time. There are so many unanswered questions and the story is full of confusing moments. I know that Horror can sometimes truly be a hit or miss and that one person's horror won't be another, but this is the kind of horror that should probably be read more than once to fully grasp just what the hell is actually happening.

I will say that while the structure of the story definitely works in creating the mood of the story, listening to the audiobook was an interesting and frustrating experience. The chapters would end rather abruptly and would often leave me wondering what had just happened.

Overall, this book was everything I was expecting, but also underwhelming in its over-all presentation. It was wild and so brain twisting. I don't know if I'd recommend it, but if I did, I'd recommend reading it slowly and maybe more than once LOL.

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198. The Island by Adrian McKinty--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

THE ISLAND was both exactly what I was hoping it would be and still completely different than what I was expecting. I knew it was going to be a ride, but I wasn't prepared for the level of wildness that this book would adopt.

Imagine that you're on vacation with your new husband and his children, shortly after those kids' biological mother has passed away. You're in a country you know close to nothing about (Australia) and being the tourists who should be featured in a horror film, you find yourselves on a small, private island being chased by a trigger happy and aggrieved family. What ensues is something straight out of Hollywood.

I saw this as a cautionary tale for "actions have consequences" and while yes, the consequences here are dire, we have to admit that the catalyst for this was heartbreaking. I think McKinty does a good job of showcasing the dangers of grief and the magic of morally grey characters. Let's be real, the MC and her husband are no saints. They do a pretty twisted thing in order to save their asses and while yes, I was rooting for them and the kids, a corner of my mind couldn't forget the awfulness of their choices.

If you're a parent, this might be a little bit of a rougher read since it does include younger kids in dangerous situations. We get to see an MC who grows as a character in order to make sure these kids survive, but I know some parents, especially those who have younger kids, might have a harder time with stories like this one. Keeping that warning in mind, there were some pretty badass moments, but also some very human ones, as well.

I really enjoyed this and I'm glad I finally picked it up!

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199. Aesthetica by Allie Rowbottom--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

AESTHETICA was a lot and to be honest, I think that's necessary in the world we live in. So many young people obsessed with social media and their appearance on those apps are incredibly impressionable. What can help them be more famous? What can make them look more beautiful? The exploration of beauty standards and how they affect a young woman, in particular, and those around her can be relatable to at least one reader.

I think that Rowbottom's book is also a great look into generational trauma because of how the MC's mother raised her and how she herself had a level of dislike towards her mom that is a whole other side to this book. While we have the clear main story of the MC regretting the choices she made and dealing with that trauma, we also have her disentangling her love/hate relationship for her ill mother.

AESTHETICA was brought to my attention by an article presenting it as a horror story. In some ways, I can understand that. There is a certain kind of horror behind the trauma of selling yourself in the name of success. There is definitely a particular kind of horror in wanting to face all of the trauma you've faced, to the point where you're set on undoing everything that is the physical proof of that trauma.

Though this is a relatively short book, I think it carries a lot of weight. We see the power of social media and a naive mentality. We see the dangers of those who present themselves in a certain way. And we see the sometimes incredibly complex relationships between mothers and daughters and how deeply entwined these relationships and our own self worth can be. Also, a brief mention on the power of childhood friendships and how they can scar us if they end too soon, or shift in any way that is beyond our control.

I'd recommend this if you want a bit of an acid trip of an exploration into the above mentioned topics.

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200. Icebreaker by Hannah Grace--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

RE-READ: September 2023:

My library got the audiobook version, so of course I HAD to put a hold on it. I was a little scared I wouldn't love this book as much as I did the first time around, but I'm happy to say that I DID! ICEBREAKER is still one of my favourite romances, if only because of the level of communication between the characters. I also forgot how spicy and full of sexual tension this book was.

Overall, super happy I re-read this. Maybe it'll be a yearly re-read. 😌

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201. Theodore Boone: Kid Lawyer by John Grisham--⭐️⭐️⭐️

There's something interesting about an older man writing a young kid--especially when his MC mentions in the book that at 13 years old, boys don't even notice girls and actively try to stay away from them. LOL. I actually laughed at that because I was thirteen over twenty years ago and I distinctly remember that not being the case. I just thought that was hilarious and felt super disconnected. Not that I want a romance story in a middle grade book, but just...let's be real. And I mention this first because it happens pretty early on.

Anyway, the MC was a pretty cool kid--he knows everyone and even has a little side gig where he gives advice to his classmates. His smart take on the current case and his enthusiasm jumps off the page. I'm not sure how I will feel about the rest of the series, but we will see!

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202. Misery by Stephen King--⭐️⭐️⭐️

I went into MISERY knowing that it's a fan favourite. I don't know what I was expecting, but I was a bit let-down. I think that while I did enjoy some aspects of this book and was genuinely freaked out at times, this kind of fell into the same category of THE SHINING for me. When I read THE SHINING, it was incredibly hyped up and even though it DID have a terrifying take on the fall of madness, it was otherwise meh for me.

One of the best things that King does with his writing (or at least back them) was his creation of madness in a character. He somehow knows how to take the most terrifying characteristics of humanity and integrates them really well into his characters. The brutality of this villain was something else, especially when we actively see her professing her love for the MC and then causing him bodily harm.

I think one of the downfalls for me in my reading experience of this was listening to the audiobook. It was disjointed and confused the hell out of me. Maybe physically reading it would have been a wholly different experience, but the disorientation of the audiobook could have either freaked me out or confused me and sadly, it was the latter.

Not my favourite King novel, but I can see why so many love it. Will continue on my reading journey with King's books.

___

203. Natural Beauty by Ling Ling Huang--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Phew, this book was weird and wild and hooked me right from the beginning.

Huang explores so many topics in her skin crawling novel: Racism, social perception of beauty, the addiction the wealthy sometimes have when it comes to "self-care", unexplored sexuality, envy, and SA in the most unusual of ways but could also be an allusion to how the rich can sometimes use money when it comes to getting away with sexual crimes.

I never expected body horror when I picked up NATURAL BEAUTY, but here we are. I remember when that started to show up in the narrative, along with the changing physical body of the MC, I paused what I was doing (while listening to the audiobook) and became even more enthralled. This was such a creepy and genius exploration of societal expectations and the things people will sometimes do to be either "different" or "like everyone else".

There's also an interesting sub-story about the MC's experiences as a child musical prodigy and how that definitely played into her malleability as a victim for the people who would eventually take advantage of her. It definitely played into the stereotypes society has about young Asian children when it comes to classical music.

And somewhere along the way, as the MC is evolving (both metaphorically AND physically), she starts to discovery a side to her sexuality never fully explored. During these scenes, it truly reminded me of the "will they/won't they" that usually accompanies blossoming sexuality--the "I want this, but do I really? But should I? Do THEY want to?" narrative that usually flashes through our minds when we're right on the verge of making that exploration.

Anyway, I'm just rambling now. I really enjoyed this, much more than I thought I would because this book was WEIRD. Like, mind-bending weird. And if it was ever made into a movie, I'd be watching it with the biggest side-eye.

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Have you read any of these books? Let me know your thoughts!

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Happy reading!

#books #booklr #bookish #Book Reviews #book review #book blog #book blogger #Features #my writing #my opinion #long text post #read #reader #reading #book list #book rec #bookworm #bookaholic #book recommendations #book reader #readers of tumblr #book addict