#maybe my brother could buy my laptop off of me or something

[pixie-mage]

I’ve thought about telling you. I’ve thought about bringing it up. You’ve asked me about my purple striped pendant enough times, and I’ve always brushed it off, and you still give it a sidelong look as if you know, so I’ve thought about saying something–

(Or leaving my laptop open on the wiki page, or doodling the flag on a sticky note and leaving it where you can see, or buying a book about it on your Amazon account, or–)

–but I never have.

Maybe it would finally convince you to leave my dating life alone. Or at least, maybe it would convince you that a dating app won’t work the same for someone like me.

Because when you’re asexual, most men on a dating app are expecting a future hookup, whether that’s now or a few weeks down the line…so you’re not what they’re looking for.

Anyway, I’ve thought about it. But I’ve also seen how you talked to me behind my sister’s back when she came out as bisexual, how you were outwardly unbothered and generally supportive but would turn to me with “If this phase lasts” and “She's still young” and “When she settles down with a guy” on your lips. It’s been a while since I’ve heard it, but even now, when she’s college age and openly dating a woman, I get the feeling you still don’t take her relationship as seriously as our brother’s relationship with his girlfriend. I get the feeling you still judge.

(You love us dearly. I know you do. The good and great family memories far far outweigh the bad. And you care about us so much. You’ve fought the world for us in the past and you’d do it again and you’ll always always love and support us in everything we do. But. But.)

And maybe you wouldn’t judge me so harshly for simply saying I’m ace, because it’s not like I’m gay, right? It’s not like I’ll end up with another girl, right? It’s not as big of a deal…right?

But I’ve also seen how judgemental you were when I started crossplaying, when I started choosing male characters to cosplay alongside the female. I was just dressing up for fun and that’s all it ever will be, but still…the judgement. The unspoken judgement of different.

And when I brought up the idea of adoption instead of having my own kids - the one time I opened up enough to mention it - you gave me the most indecipherable look that made me feel like I’d said something horribly, horribly wrong. And I said “What?” and you said “Nothing.” But it was “nothing” in the “I won’t say it, but you should know” way. It was “nothing” in the “I won’t say it, but I’ll let you feel my dissatisfaction from where you’re sitting” way.

And just this year, I got so close. I almost said something. We were having a conversation - god knows I can’t even remember how it started now - but I got brave enough to ask if it would be so wrong to never want to be physically intimate with someone. And I got an exaggeration eyeroll, and a “You have GOT to get over your fear of sex” as if you knew me sooo well that you obviously could see what I really meant. But you didn’t. You don’t. And when I said - rather impulsively - that “I’m not afraid, I just don’t want to do it. It’s gross and uncomfortable” - well.

“That’s a childish response.”

Because god forbid I feel differently than you do about something that would only affect my life. God forbid I dislike something even when the rest of the world expects me to want to love it. God forbid.

So I haven’t told you. With a response like that, why the hell would I?

You always say “you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince”…and sure, I understand the meaning. But why does finding a prince require kissing? Why can’t I hug him instead? Why can’t a peck on the cheek suffice? I’d offer him a Lego minifigure if that would do the trick. I’d much prefer it.

But no, I’m childish for wanting to keep my body to myself.

You signed me up for a dating app when I was in early college. At the time I thought it was funny, and I still kind of do. I know that you want to see me happy and you assume finding a partner is what will do that. And maybe I would be happy with a partner in my life…but not the kind you’re thinking of.

See, the problem with dating apps - the problem with dating - is I know eventually the guy will get bored. He’ll get bored before we hit five months because the whole time he’ll have been waiting for the chance to take me to bed, and unfortunately for him, the thought will have never crossed my mind. Hell, the last time we tried to make out I was probably thinking about pizza rolls and wondering how long people are supposed to keep kissing like that. When is it acceptable to stop? When is it polite to get back to watching the movie? How much kissing is enough to satisfy someone else? Because it sure as hell does next to nothing for me.

I used to think I was broken, you know.

I used to think there was something wrong with me if everyone was explaining kissing and sex as this fantastic thing, and I was sitting there going “What’s there to like?”

I used to think - hell - maybe mom was right. Maybe I just have to keep kissing frogs.

But at some point, you kiss enough frogs that never turn into princes, and you start to realise that maybe the problem isn’t the frogs you’re picking. Maybe the problem is you. Maybe you don’t have the magic in your lips to turn ‘em back into royalty.

And then you date an amazing, amazing guy, and you think “Wow, I could picture a life with him” and you think “This could be something” and you think “This is a prince…right?” …but you still feel nothing. The romance is there, and the joy of shared interests, and the matching sense of humor, and the laughter and the fun and you fit and it’s amazing - but physically? Sexually? Nothing. You feel nothing. You’re still daydreaming about pizza rolls when you’re kissing on the couch, and nothing has changed.

So you think…another frog?

And you end things.

And you think it’s better that way.

And you think maybe you were just excited over a solid friendship and misinterpreted what you were feeling.

But then you find an internet post that is far too relatable. You find an artist that has put into words the exact way you’ve been feeling for years. You find a comic that sends a shockwave of a revelation through your head and you feel - you feel whole. You feel unbroken. You feel like this is what you were missing all along.

One word that makes you feel a little less alone, knowing there are others out there just like you.

Asexual.

A person who feels no physical attraction toward others.

Sometimes they want to be physically intimate with their partner even though they feel nothing, but sometimes? Sometimes they really really don’t.

And it’s okay.

And it has a name.

And it’s not broken.

…and I would tell you all of this if I felt like I could. But.

But.

It’s just a phase and you’d be happier with a partner and that’s a childish response.

Is it any wonder I have never explained what my purple striped pendant really means?

#The Purple Striped Pendant #Asexual #grey ace #demisexual #okay to reblog <3 #it was a demisexual comic in truth but it also explained asexuality as a whole and it was the best thing I could have ever found #I would love to thank the artist for helping me realize and discover this part of myself #if i ever find that comic again I surely will send her a message #Pixiemage Writes

[luvly-writer]

“XOXO”

Ch. 3 Part-Time lovers, full time problem

—•—

Tim Drake x reader

Fic + social media Au

warnings:

taglist: @w31rdg1rl @mxtokko @loonymoonystuff @grandstrangerphantom

Author’s note: One thing i love about Christmas is all the free time i have to write new stuff after finals 🤭 (she said as she still has a few finals to finish 😍). HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS CHAPTER!

For those wondering about “BOCM” i am having such a hard time finishing it. When my phone got changed the notes i had on that story got deleted and so i had to improvise a little cause i forgot its ending and it’s so frustrating cause i always want to give you guys quality content. I am scratching my head trying to finish it so i’ll continue this one and update slowly so that i can finish it correctly. Love you all and thank you for your patience.

Masterlist:

“Absolutely insufferable, she is,” said Tim to himself as he ran his hand through his hair. He had been begrudgingly cleaning his apartment. He was tempted to leave it dirty just to take a piss at Yn but he was sure that wouldn’t look good for his reputation so here he was. He would have hired someone to do it for him but recalling all the things he had regarding his alter ego, he knew he would have been fucked and he really couldn’t risk someone else knowing.

Finally, he finished ensuring everything looked great and sat back on his couch with his laptop. "There must be something about her that I can find. I refuse to be outdone and unprepared for this," he said, searching for any leverage he could hold over Y/n's head to bargain for his secret to remain so. Thirty minutes later he had found absolutely nothing. Unlike her two best friends, Clara Dupont and Satine Abbott, who were known to be found in scandal after scandal every week, Y/n had a clean slate. Satine was constantly partying during some fashion week or getting caught sleeping around with some governor's son or a married businessman. Clara has been known to pay off people to do her bidding, caught buying off police, lawyers, teachers, professors, judges and so, to run the city however she pleased. Yet, Y/n had nothing against her. Every article he found was about a charity she had worked on, a program she had opened, or an award she was given; and were all of them legit. She seemed like the angel in their group, but Tim knew better than to trust the all-too-shiny act. He has some recollection of them during high school though; he was a grade above them. They were known for their tight and exclusive group of three. He remembers how girls would do anything to become one of them. If it meant they had to step on someone else to appease one of the three, they would have done so. After all, having them as a connection moved mountains. Tim quickly grew frustrated. No psycho exes, no drug addiction, no jail time, no one dead, no bribes, nothing that could have stained the Vanderbilt name.

Throwing his head back, he heard his phone ring. Y/n was here. He sets his laptop on the coffee table and walks to the door, opening it and revealing a dazzling young woman in an outfit he thought someone as flashy as she never would wear. White Converse, comfortable mom jeans, a laid-back button-up up, and a cozy long brown coat. Her hair was loose and her face fresh with little makeup. Even after spending hours looking at pictures of her during his search, she still managed to take his breath away every time he was in her presence.

"I know I'm mesmerizing, but can you please let me inside? I'm freezing here," she said with her nose a little red.

He rolls his eyes with a laugh and lets her in. "I was gonna go more for repulsive but if that helps you sleep at night."

"Says the one that looks like sewer trampled rat" she quips back.

Tim couldn't help the snort that came out of him. She was an endless supply of good comebacks. He wonders how an interaction between his brothers and her would go, maybe he finally found someone to go head-to-head with Damian. She takes her coat off and lays it on the couch, together with her Burberry bag. He takes notice that her coat is also Burberry and decides to tease her a little. "And here I thought you were actually looking a little humble, but the coat and the bag ruin the look," he says as he scrunches his nose. He feels laughter bubbling as he catches the deadpan she gives him. "Whose less humble, me for wearing it and not saying a single thing or you for identifying it rather quickly and feeling the need to point it out?" she asks as she places a hand on her hip smirking at him.

"Touche"

She nods satisfied at his response and sits on the couch in front of him. "Ok. First order of business-"

"First order of business is giving me the reason as to why you are doing this." Tim interrupts her. She sighs and looks up, "God give me strength to not strangle him" she whispers and Tim tries to hold back a smirk.

"I wAS going to get to that before you so rudely interrupted me. The first order of business is giving you the context I am sure you are dying to hear." she pauses to look at him and he gestures for her to continue. He sees her look down and seem almost embarrassed. He can tell she is hesitating so he tries his best guess, "Are you trying to make someone jealous?"

"No, it's not that, it..." She takes a deep breath and spills it out. "My parents want me to marry a man who is very much too much older than me with the idea that it will help solidify the family lineage which I think is absurd because my sisters are right there AND THEY ARE MARRIED already to someone they love. But because Aurora and Charlisse keep on fighting to become the next CEO, my parents think it is only right to marry ME off to a very wrinkly and truly disturbing man who i am sure 20 years older than me because someone should continue the line whilst the other two are focused on their careers and making something out of their lives. SO, I needed to find a boyfriend who would be suitable for their standards whilst Aurora and Charlisse sort it out so that when they do, the attention and pressure of continuing the line will go back to them and not me." Y/n finishes breathing out. Tim was taken aback. Not only the normally composed girl he was used to seeing, spoke 7 words per second, but he was blown away by the information she had just given him.

"I need...a drink? Do you want one?" he said standing up and heading to the kitchen. No wonder she said this might take a while.

"Yes please" she said with a tense smile. "do you have wine?"

Tim made a sound of confirmation as he poured some scotch. He wasn't much of a drinker, but years of being part of the business world made him earn some appreciation for the drink. Especially on times like these. He poured some wine for her in a glass and walked back with both drinks. He gave her the glass and sat down. "Isn't that a little medieval?"

"Old money has habits that are tough to kill, unfortunately" she mutters dejectedly to her glass. "So, Timothy, any questions?"

"A few actually"

"Go ahead" she sad as she leaned back and got comfortable.

"Whose the old man?"

"Mr. Morris."

"You are fucking with me!" Tim reacted horrified, making Y/n laugh. If he hadn't been so shocked he would have delighted in her laughter but atlas, the situation did not give him the flexibility to do so. "Y/n say you are lying! That man is too old"

"I know, next question."

"Why me?"

"You are a good candidate and a lucky coincidence. I was going to ask Satine and Clara to help me but, that frankly would have ended in a disaster. I believe that as long as a plan stays between the parties involved who have something to lose, it will be successful. Satine would have chosen some random man who she's probably been involved with and Clara knows everything about everyone in the city-"

"Everything?"

"Except this of course, as I was saying she probably would have created a fake identity, assigned it to someone then, bribed them into playing the part."

"Much like you did?"

"I blackmailed you, not bribed you, get it right. Continuing, it was rather easy to choose you. You are Bruce Wayne's son, and even without that, you come from high society from your biological family, so you know the social cues and the ways of the people I am constantly surrounded by. You have proven to be quite ingenious as well as a good businessman. Knowing your "other me" proves you might as well be honorable too and what hero is not dammed with a savior complex can resist a damsel in distress? It is in your nature to want to influence things to be okay. My parents are friendly with Bruce therefore making things more appealing for the situation. I had the perfect leverage, the perfect candidate, and now I just need the perfect situation. So, lucky me when you bumped into me"

"You mean when you bumped into me?" he asked and she glared at him. "Careful, pretty boy," she said, and the way she said it caused chills to go down his spine.

"Any more questions, perhaps about my clean histoy and my best friend's not so clean image?"

Tim looked at her and she gestured to his laptop.

"What do you have to hide?" ha asked leaning foward.

"Wouldn't you like to know? Next question." she smiled as she also leaned forward in her seat. "What's our story?" he asked looking down at her lips, a little bit stained by the wine she had been drinking. Tempting

"Well, that's why I'm here huh, detective?" That nickname shouldn't have had the effect it did on him, but God, he wanted to hear those words from her again. "Show me why Red Robin is the world's greatest mind, second to Batman's only," she said leaning back and taking a sip of her glass once again.

"World's greatest detective, not mind, and some would say I have surpassed Batman, get it right," he said as he repeated her words in the end. "We need cero plotholes, so much so that it has to be so good that not even my family can find them. We are after all a family of detectives"

"Amazing" she said, sitting up straight, her entire focus solely on him.

"We both went to GA, so that's a starting point, we may not even have to lie. We met at Gotham Academy a few years back, you crushed on me for some time seeing as I was a year above you, and then forgot about me when I dropped out. Years later, we bump into each other on the street, and sparks fly or whatever the fuck will make the crowd fall in love with us, and then we start from there. Depending on how desperate are our odds, we will explain our timeline, but we have to agree on it before going public. How did you react when your parents told you the news?

"It waaaass..messy. A lot of screaming and crying"

"Then you will tell your parents of how heartbroken you were when they told you because you finally get the chance to be with your one true love and"

"Wait wait wait wait! Why do I have to be the lovesick puppy in this and you the prince charming" she said narrowing her eyes at him.

"Whose the one in dire need of escaping the situation?"

"Who's identity is in danger?"

"Who will be recreating the handmaid's tale?"

"You bitch!" She gasped at his insinuation

"Exactly so, puppy love for you it is. As I was saying, you finally got the chance to be with the love of your life, and the moment you are prepared to tell them, they spring this news onto you. So how dare they. We can coordinate public appearances, photos, family dinners, and posts so that everything will flow perfectly. Finally, once, you are liberated, we coordinate and stage a breakup and you hand me all the information you have on me cause I know you made copies of everything and I will eliminate all. of. it. We will just be another famous couple that got together and broke up and moved on." Tim was satisfied with his work. Y/n looked absolutely amazed by him.

"Wow...and you came up with all of that, that fast?" she said full of wonder. Tim felt a tug in his heart due to her reaction. It had been a long time since he had managed to make someone truly amazed by him in a really long time. He had been so used to being surrounded by skilled detectives, assassins, meta-humans, and aliens, that he forgot how great it felt to simply just be and have someone admire you for it. The little praise-seeking self in the back of his mind was thriving on her admiration. "Yes."

"Fuck...I think I couldn't have ever picked a better partner for this if I tried. Your reputation does you justice, Timothy, you are brilliant." she smiled. Y/n felt relieved. She was soon going to be free from her family's pressure. Another scheme has gone perfectly. She cleared her throat and masked her face once again. "We have to make a contract, establish some ground rules."

"By all means," said Tim. "I am serious. First rule, I get all evidence of my alter ego destroyed once it's over. I am doing this only if that is assured."

"Deal. Second rule, no one, absolutely NO ONE, knows except for the two of us." she said and he nodded, "I agree"

"Third rule, Kissing only happens if the situation requires it," she said. He hadn't noticed she had opened a doc in his laptop and was writing this entire thing down. He hummed in agreeance, too busy admiring her....admiring her...WOOP WOOP! EARTH TO TIM! This is a fake relationship and you are already getting fond of her?!?!??! WAKE UP

"Fourth rule, no feelings. This is strictly professional" he snapped, making her look at him strangely. "I think that was already implied but sure, if you want it written, I'll add it" and turned to his laptop again.

He felt a pit in his stomach. This was professional and besides, he just found her attractive, he can anyone attractive and it doesn't mean anything. Plus she is kind of an asshole. She is blackmailing him into a fake relationship...to save herself from being sold like cattle and forced to marry a creepy man which if he thinks of it maybe it is the best way she saw fit. AND AND she was very rude to him and has quite the attitude..although it is so attractive how she goes head to head with him. Tim was sweating' bullets.

"And done. I added a few things such as we have to have some sort of PDA, and how we might coordinate things. You know, some silly stuff that most people think isn't important but might end up being so. Do you have a printer?" She asked to which he nodded and gestured to his office. She sent the paper to print and went to look for it. Tim took a deep sigh, he just needed to calm down. He just found her attractive and interesting like a new case that needed to be cracked.

"Perfect, I printed two contracts; one for you and one for me. I also took one of your blue pens and signed on both papers, here, sign here and here." After it was done, she had noticed that a few hours had passed. "I should get going. I promised Satine and Clara that I would have dinner with them if they kept the paparazzi off me so that I could get here unbothered and we didn't have any issues." She said as she went for her coat and her purse. "Have a nice night, Timothy"

"Tim"

"Huh?"

"My friends and family call me Tim," he said looking at her.

She smiled softly, "Okay...Timmy, have a good night and get some rest." His heart melted at the fact that she took his nickname and altered it to make it hers. She heard her driver arrive outside and walked towards the door, Tim not so far behind. He noticed she faltered her step a little and looked at him hesitating. "Be....be careful tonight" she said but it was more like a whisper.

Tim nodded, "Thank you, enjoy dinner and get home safe," he told her as she went outside and went to her car. He stayed there until she got in the car and it began moving.

As she left, Y/n unfolded the contract from her purse and read the last rule...no feelings...

"you are going to be trouble.." she said fighting off a tiny smile and thinking of the handsome boy with the sharp quips, magnificent brain, and gorgeous blue eyes.

"What was that, miss Vanderbilt?" asked Donnie, her driver.

"Oh, it's nothing, Don. We are headed to L'amico, I'm meeting the girls for dinner," she said sweetly and her driver nodded.

Author's note: What do you think of their dynamic? Liking it so far? Feel free to give me any feedback you'd like.

#batfamily #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #duke thomas #stephanie brown #barbara gordon #cassandra cain #damian wayne #alfred pennyworth #batfam #batman #tim drake x fem!reader #tim drake x you #tim drake x reader #tim drake x y/n #batfam imagine #batfam dc #batfam au #batfamily social media #batfam x you #batfam x reader #batfamily x you #batfamily x reader #dc reader insert #dc batman #dcau #dc #dc x reader

[alltingfinns]

TEH, part 3

I wasn’t sure how much there was left after the bonfire scene but apparently there’s about a half hour left, meaning these parts are in neat thirds.

I write as if anyone else knows what I’m talking about when these drop randomly once a year or so.

Sherlock remained more in focus from John’s perspective.

Still so cute how Sherlock immediately must hustle his parents out when his crush heterosexual former roommate shows up.

Mum putting her foot in the doorway in case there was any doubt who’s the “sherlock” of these two.

“Your parents? Your parents? Those were your parents?”

John who desperately wants to understand Sherlock. How much he would have wanted to interrogate them, I’m sure. But then he has to giggle at the absurdity of the Holmes brothers having such (seemingly) ordinary parents.

And then the hurt. “Did they know too?”

“So that’s why they weren’t at the funeral!” Because if they had been, John would have recognized them now of course. But also he probably thought they had died or something, making their existence as ordinary people even more shocking.

“Wasn’t working for me.” If Molly and John not mirrors then why this exact line. Why not “Well, everybody hated it” or “Didn’t fit me” or “Kept tickling my lips”.

Just saying. Plenty of options.

“Last night” “Too nebulous” goes on with the case.

There’s all the likelihood that, like with Sherlock’s survival, the writers just didn’t care who put John in the bonfire. They just wanted John in the bonfire. So that Sherlock could heroically rescue him.

And yes I was thinking about how this episode takes place “today” as in 5th November as in Guy Fawke’s Day. (Though the cool kids call it John Johnson’s day.)

Am I just that Johnlocked that I find it adorable that Sherlock angled the laptop so that John would see more/be more included?

Sumatra road is 28 minutes by car from Westminister. Definitely not below it. Gotta take some creative liberties for those sweet canon references.

Why hasn’t Moran just left town entirely? Oh well.

A bit of illegal breaking and entering as people walk by without giving them a second glance. That’s big cities for you.

I forgot how far they have to go through this.

Love that John got to comment on the demolition charges.

Ah, I get it! Moran still has to be in like radio range or something.

“Why do you think I know what to do?” Really, Sherlock? Really?

“And a soldier, as you keep reminding us all!” Sherlock why are you being so petty, you love him being a former soldier.

051113 is the bomb code.

I just love the line “Use your mind palace” because it makes me think of how intelligence is weirdly used as a superpower in media.

Also that you can vaguely hear Sherlock saying “off” as he’s panicking with his hands around the bomb.

John is so fucking smart but also maybe he also just has faith in Sherlock being clever enough. But anyway just cutting through the bullshit, this is a trick.

Maybe Sherlock is underhanded here. But John finds this sort of stuff difficult.

So here we get John Watson’s version of Dean Winchester’s purgatory prayer. “Of course I forgive you”

This explanation is definitely unreliable narrator. Sherlock wasn’t quite as in control as he likes to portray himself so of course he makes it out otherwise. But he’s convinced that Moriarty died but again: A. Singular. Body.

This explanation means that it was John that most importantly had to buy it. Possibly because close friend, with medical certification who Sherlock nonetheless felt he couldn’t trust the acting skills of.

I think this scene happened (more or less) and sometime after the proper end to the episode. But like even Anderson(Philip) noticed that the explanation is lacking.

Sherlock laughing like the utter little shit he is.

“There’s always an off switch.” Say that to the undefusable bomb. Although technically it did have an off switch, it was just too complicated to be tried without knowing the proper sequence.

Getting John to laugh even when he’s angry with him.

They really are the right kind of wrong for each other.

Mycroft being les miserable. XD

“Weddings. Not really my thing.”

You’re going to be planning and arranging the whole thing you miserable bastard!

A difference between Molly and John. She went for the suspiciously similar substitute, he went for (what he believed to be) the exact antithesis.

Oh my little lestrolly heart at Lestrade asking if Molly and Tom are serious. Although he is likely doing it because he is the one who would comment on the elephant.

“Real life is rarely so neat.” The goddamn bonfire.

They’re literally saying that the one true explanation for Sherlock surviving is that John asked him to.

“Time to be Sherlock Holmes.” *wears the damn hat*

Sherlock’s mind palace is certainly nicer than Magnussen’s.

#rebecka’s sherlock rewatch #sherlock #johnlock #sherlock meta #remember remember the fifth of november #john mirrors

[ayoharuko]

Genshin Impact Bf Headcanons

 Hi everyone I'm back yay!😊

I'm feeling a bit better so i decided to just make a part 2 instead of snoozing around....

I hope u guys enjoy this part and I'm sorry for the wrong spelling or bad Grammer.

I also apologize if the headcanons are a bit occ or not canon at all these are headcanons after all. i wrote this on my laptop

Also one more thing I'll apologize for is sometimes the writing style will change like last time it might look nice and now its....just a bit not nice?? Does that make sense? sorry sorry I'm getting side tracked....

I just had my adhd moment−

oh even if i wanted to copy the same style as i did last time I'm too lazy to check the last post probably cause I'm derived of sleep and surviving with coffee ok fr imma stop-

REMINDER: All these characters belong to hoyoverse and does not belong to me (•ˋ _ ˊ•)

Anywaysss hope u enjoy this!

(Liyue Boys)

~Ajax my boi~ (Childe, Tartagila)

~Possessive Boyfriend~

• I had a debate between possessive or overprotective since he's technically both, a cunning fox and a blood thirsty wolf, but possessive takes the cake for me hahaha

• He doesn't like people's eyes on you. makes him jealous but he also likes peoples eyes on you. makes him prideful to show off that your he's

• Definitely leaves marks on you like obvious places too!

• If you fight or have a vision and can fight expect him to train with you, help you with your tasks and spar aka fight with you just to see who's stronger lmao

• Buys you expensive gifts when he's away(That fatui money yuh~✨)

• PLEASE BE CAREFUL NOT TO MAKE HIM JEALOUS. i feel like if he gets like really jealous your walking card....gone bish✨ and that person ✨G O N E✨

• Like when you met traveler he full on THOUGHT that were flirting with you and actually kind off threatened them-

• He siblings/family already adore you even if they haven't met you yet, they just know your a very nice person because of what teucer tells them!

• Speaking of teucer.....he probably loves you more then he's big brother....lol jk..or maybe...? But teucer loves you a lot since he sees you make he's big brother really happy all the time and also because your very nice and play with him a lot! This makes childe very happy since he knows he doesn't have to worry about he's siblings hating you.

• If you can't cook expect him to cook breakfast or dinner and also if he's free and yall live together he could also clean the house if you want~

• He always has hearts in he's eyes whenever you guys are together and for once the people around him and see a Slight sparkle in he's eyes

•  He's your overprotective but possessive wolf and he would go crazy if something happens to you...

• You guys go on dinner dates especially if your both are in Snezhnaya

• He kinda keeps you a secret from the fatui but sometimes he can't help but brag about you still being careful with he's word of course 

• He loves you...a lot...but sometimes it can be... a little....crazy

Nicknames: Mine, Babe and baby

Voice line about you: Heyyy there comrade! I see your getting quite comfy with y/n over there....what nono..I'm not assuming you of anything I'm jjust gonna let you know their mine....alright? Good! dont want you sealing them now haha!

When he talks to you: Hiya babe~ what? You didn't like the way i talked to traveler? oh come on the were sealing all your attention from me tho~!

~Old Man Morax~ (Zhongli)

~Gentleman boyfriend~

• I don't imagine him as a jealous or possessive person since he's lived through so many years he probably has high patience. However doesn't mean he's not  overprotective since he's basically lost a lot of things in he's life he always make sure your safe, your eating well, water etc always cares about your health.

• Hu tao at one point has told you both that you remind her of an old married couple....and i think she's right-

• He wakes up before you and prepares you both tea not before admiring your sleepy face of course❣

• Cooks breakfast(Imagine him in an apron😫)for you both and cleans you guys house when your at work just him being a malewife🥺

• Would always open doors for you, buy you flowers(When he has mora) and buys you thinks when he's out in liyue(Again if he has mora otherwise its childes-)

• When you first made him lunch as a surprise at work he had the most heart warming smile ever like smiling while eating the food you cooked and just praising you constantly as well. Hu tao was jealous you didn't make her lunch lol

• At one point of you guys relationship he told the whole truth about him being an ex-god and even showed he's dragon form just so you would believe him.... and thank the archons you still accepted him for who he was and loved him...

• Sometimes when you guys are at the comfort of your house he lets out he's horns and tail so you can pet or touch them which he likes very much and you end up with a big dragon on you-

• Xiao has definitely been watching over you and zhongli knows it...he's grateful that even if he's not present xiao will be the one to watch over you🥺😭

• You guys would be outside at the sunset enjoying your tea and just overall chilling...those are he's favorite moments with you❤

• You guys can be found strolling around liyue just looking at the beautiful city

• He appreciates how you try and listen to he's tales even if he knows that some of them are boring and makes you fall asleep but he still appreciates in you trying to listen.

• Arguments would almost never happen in your relationship of course excluding you guys disagreements but zhongli tries to avoid arguing with you since he hates yelling and overall just hates seeing you mad.

• Even in a million years he would never stop being over in heels inlove with you💕

Nicknames: My gem, dear and my beloved

Voice line about you: “Hm...traveler..would you perhaps think that this would look nice on y/n? You think it would? Alright then I'll be taking this then. What? Oh...m-mora i..uhm..forgot my wallet again it seems...apologies..I'll pay you back traveler”

When he talks to you: “Dear i must thank you for this....it tastes marvelous”

~Baby Xiao~ (Alatus)

~Shy But Overprotective Boyfriend~

• He's both shy but very overprotective of you. Like he thinks your made of glass so he always watches you. minus when he has to go fight demons at night of course, but he always wants you to stay at the hotel when its night time since he knows how dangerous it is when its night time at liyue. if you have errand to do however...except him to come with you even if he hates large crowds.

• He'll only come and see you when you bring him food or call out he's name. and that was at like at least a few months into your relationship with him. The reason for this is because he doesn't want he's karma to affect you since your the only light he has.

• He only eats whatever you cook as he thinks their exceptional to he's taste. girl he actually thinks your cooking is delicious thats why lol

• He LOVES headpats and LOVES kisses on the forehead. FIGHT ME I DARE YOU🙂

• When you hug him he turns red in an instant and then relaxes but sometimes(Sadly) pushes you off of him...since he's too scare of he's karma going to you😭, meaning he's always running away from you....

• But there are sometimes when you convince him to stay...and when he does stay...he lets you do whatever you please with him. Thats including kisses, reassurance, comfort and cuddles for the baby💕

• If you get hurt he instantly blames himself. So you have to reassure him that it isn't he's fault whatsoever.

• He brings you Qingxin flowers he's favorite flowers and leaves it at your nightstand if you live in the hotel its a reminder from him to you that he loves you and that he always watches over you.

• At every affection you give him it doesn't matter if big or small he always turns red since that how much he had fallen for you. 

• Ya know you'll feel like you have a guard dog always watching you....in a good way

• Always dreads the day you'll have to leave him...he knows your a mortal...he knows their fragile and weak...but he just doesn't wanna let you go...your he's only weakness and the only one who shows he's love for.

Nicknames: My light(Rarely)

Voice line about you: “What? I'm not looking at y/n...your simply imagining....”

When he talks to you: “You called? H-huh? Cuddles? I suppose it won't hurt...just this once...I'll humor you..you mortal”

~Bookworm Boi~ (Xingqiu)

~Prince Boyfriend~ 

• He might act like a prince but he is still a bookworm...but we love he's nerdy side so thats fine!

• Since xingqiu’s basically rich he definitely knows how to act like a gentleman...although before he fall inlove with you i like to think he had ignored every person who he's family set him up with..so they were surprised to find out that he suddenly took an interest in you.

• There are sometimes where he pays more attention to he's books more then you but please dont worry he loves you😊

• Buys books that he thinks makes you think of him. i mean he does have the money-

• He thought of a love story that was about you both and wrote it down...but writing it down poor Chongyun had to since our water boi’s hand-writing sucks, but it was worth it since it was very romantic and cute⁓

• He also writes poems about you and then read them to you in the afternoon under a tree while your napping either on he's shoulder or lap.

• Compliments everyday baby💕

• HE'S A MF TEASE. like you see the pranks or things he does to poor Chongyun?? I feel bad for you both😔

• When he's not occupy with a book you both are walking around liyue either buying things at stalls, books or food really anything he's down.

• Yelan watches over you both. like sometimes she'll treat you both to a restaurant and she'll sit in another table while you both have your meal(She pays for it too)Basically she observers how you both interact with each other and finds you both cute🥺

• Overall he's a real prince to you minus being a bookworm

Nicknames: My liege and love

Voice line about you: “This book reminds me of them....lets buy it”

When he talks to you: “Hm? You would like my attention? Hehe...alright then my liege..I'll give you what you want~”

~Precious Exorcist~ (Chongyun)

~Shy Boyfriend~

• Now him...he's 100% baby

• Whenever you touch him he short circuits. My boi knows nothing about girls-. Xinyan or yun jin obviously don't count, When we're talking about periods...its a different story....

• But he's very sweet and cares for you!, always senses when your upset/sad and immediately tries to cheer you up.

• Your he's meat shied if xingqiu comes looking for him...he tries to avoid he's friend quite a lot.

• Xingqui teases you both well mainly chongyung about how much he's a simp for you hehe...

• He always stutters when he talks to you. with the blush too!

• He's always on a look out for evil spirits or demons since he wants to protect you. When you have a nightmare he blames it on demons and he's dislike towards them increases.

• Like how yelan would watch over you and xingqiu. Shenhe watches over the both of you as a protector since she knows that chongyung still has a lot to learn and even if doesn't wanna admit it...she worries for you both.

• Shares he's popsicles with you💘

Nicknames:(Sadly no nickname he's too shy yall)

Voice line about you: “I-i get it now xingqui! g-geez...i..love them..a lot..”

When he talks to you: “H-how are you? O-oh fine? thats good...uhm..would you like to go to xinyan’s concert tomorrow?”

And that concludes our liyue boys!

tysm for reading this far everyone and again I'm sorry for the grammer or spelling mistakes o(*￣▽￣*)ブ

I hope u guys enjoyed this one my brain kinda hurtled from thinking this much headcanons lol

But it was worth it I'm proud to have finish part 2!. Now part 3 will be maybe after a few days and its the inazuma boys this time yay💕

But yea tysm for reading this far everyone mua mua~!💕✨

#gensgin impact #genshin headcanons #genshin x you #genshin fluff #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #zhongli x you #xiao x reader #xingqui x you #chongyung x you #childe x you

[heymeowmao]

2023.06.06 - https://weibo.com/l/wblive/p/show/1022:2321324909692089401460

加油啊!

bgm: Chong Zi OST - Heaven Light (天光)

LYN: Hallo everybody, good evening. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning! Welcome!! Long time no see. I feel like I haven’t streamed in a long time, at least. And... why is the sound so loud? /adjusts/. It’s been a while since I streamed last and I saw that a few of you were going out of your minds. You resorted to taunting me to get me to get me to come. Can we spread a little more kindness in this world? Please? It’s only been a few days and you’ve already started to taunt me. It’s not necessary, alright? LYN: When I’m in a good condition, I will come to stream on my own when I think the time is right. I hope you don’t push me next time. When you start pushing, I start second-guessing myself and think that maybe I SHOULD be streaming. But if my condition isn’t great- for example if I did some recording that day or took care of some different business- then I won’t be able to stream the way I want. I’d be forcing myself to stream. It’s not necessary. Let’s leave it up to me, alright? If I’m in a good condition and I want to stream and chat and relax, I’ll come. But otherwise... let me rest! 

LYN: The stream lagging a little is normal, because I’ve upgraded my equipment. If I upgrade my camera, I have to upgrade my computer, too. After that, you might think the sound card isn’t doing a good enough job- a lot of you always complain that the sound is too low. I don’t know why you can’t wear some headphones... but you always complain that the sound is low. After upgrades, the computer can’t keep up. See? It seems like I have to change my computer AGAIN. I’ve only had it for two years- it cost a lot- and now I have to buy a new one. Technology is too advanced for my computer to keep up. C: Sell it. LYN: I won’t be selling it. It’s just because that for this stream I’ve returned home to Beijing. i don’t have a desktop computer here, so I’m using the laptop. The signal on it is probably lacking, so it lags every once in a while. It’s enough for you to watch, though. Thanks, everyone (for your understanding). Our main focus is on “company”. Even if you are just photos (profile pics) we’re keeping each other company, alright? 

bgm: LBFD/CLJ OST - Searching for You (寻一个你)

LYN: Why am I wearing this today? Because the NCEE is fast-approaching. In order to fit the theme, I’ve worn some clothes that make me look younger. Let me pretend to be young, to be a student. Is it alright? Our theme here is “young.” LYN: As long as you’re satisfied with this look, all’s well.  LYN: The other thing is I haven’t lived in this Beijing house for a long time, since I am always away in Hengdian. I don’t really have any clothes to wear, here. I tried looking, I did, and I couldn’t find anything to wear. People always say that a woman’s closet is always lacking something. I get the feeling I’m lacking ten outfits- to use for streaming. I always feel like I don’t have anything to wear when I want to stream. Let me tell you- I do put thought into what I wear. You might think that I choose my streaming outfit at random, but I actually put a lot of effort into it. 

C: Ning-ge, I thought you had 3,000 outfits. LYN: When I first debuted- in the first two years- I might have had 3,000 outfits but now, three years later, how many clothes do you think I have? Think about it. There’s a room in this house that looks like a storage room and it’s full of clothes. I can’t even wear some of them because I bought them so long ago that the color has gone off from age.  C: Raffle them. LYN: We could... we could pick a concert stop- if I’m having a concert next year- and let’s say it’s a 10,000 person venue... Wait- I don’t have 10,000 pieces of clothing... Let’s do this instead. I’ll take 1,000 pieces of clothing for each stop and gift it to the audience. The concert benefit is being gifted clothes second-hand. 

- - - - - - - - - - 

C: How’s the album coming along? LYN: I really am working on album stuff right now. But if it were such an easy thing to do, it wouldn’t have taken me three years to release one. Think about the singers nowadays- there are as many as they come. It’s really difficult to continuously release albums, unless they are songwriters themselves. They could write their own works and put as much into that as they wanted; but even so, there are times when you have no inspiration. For me, as someone who does not have the ability to write songs... I just have to wait for something that works. Sometimes even when you find one, someone else gets to it first. It’s up to luck and timing. This time around I have taken my time to pick the songs and I’ve gotten some that I really like.  LYN: Let me tell you about my plans. I want to release this album before the end of the year. I previously released a song called “Fall in Love”- you know it, right? My fans have probably heard it before, but there are many of you who are just passing by and have entered the wrong shop- or have been dragged in by someone handing out cards- let me play my song “Fall in Love” for you. -- Fall in Love LYN: I went crazy all of a sudden. 

LYN: This was going to be the title song for my album... but it’s been two years since the track was released. Well- one and a half years. I sang it for the first time at the Jiangsu New Year’s Event... and then... about two years have passed and the album was never released. If I release it later in the year, it WILL be three years. So my plan for this year is to get my album out before December. It’ll be around 10 songs. This song (Fall in Love)- we can do without. I mean- not count it as part of the album. It’ll just be a single. LYN: As for my album, I’ll remake it. I had collected a few for the album from before, and have recorded two of them. But now... immodestly speaking, my singing has improved in the last two years. Listening to those songs now I think, “What the heck is this singing? WTF is this?? You think you can release an album like this, you must be crazy!” So the other day I re-recorded one of the songs. LYN: To singers “progress” is relative to a lot of different aspects. The first is the progression of age. The second is the advancement of music. The third probably has to do with the fact that I am acting now. After acting, I feel like I can better express emotions. I can let them show more or.. how should I say it? (Express them more subtly.) I have a deeper feeling/understanding of them now. LYN: Penny-jie gave me a song. Not counting Fall in Love, I should have... four now. But I should be able to confirm another one or two in the next couple of days. They’ve given me demos and I’ve given gone through them briefly and I think they’re very nice but I’ll have to get a better listen. I now have four complete songs and will get another three or four in the next days. I’ll have seven. Then I can just find three more and we can release the at the end of the year. :) My plan is to release the album before the end of the year- 10 songs- and then open up my concerts mid 2024. That’s just an estimate, because I have to film in the first half. Probably May or June. But before the concert I want to release an EP of about 5 songs.

C: Will you release an MV? LYN: I am working on an MV, yes. I’m planing on finding a few of my good friends- I can now make a PROPER MV. The MVs I shot before were all: I’m looking for something. I walk to the ocean and I search. I climb a ladder. I run. I look up at the sky and sit by my bedside, depressed. I’m emo. More conceptual. Now I don’t want to make MVs like that. I want something with a plot. So the songs I am finding now are all- /cuts himself off/. In any case, I’m going to find some of my good friends to help me shoot it. Of course, I will not be paying them. LYN: I already asked them- “If I release an album next year, will you help me shoot the mv?” They asked me if I would pay extra, and I replied that if they continued that thought I would block them. XD  LYN: My MV would need a group of them- I'll find 10 artists to act in the MV for me. Something that requires 2,000 extras. We’ll do a “human wave attack” (人海战术; offensive infantry tactic in which an attacker conducts an unprotected frontal assault with densely concentrated infantry formations -wiki).

LYN: So, for those of you asking about how my album is going, I really am working on getting it released this year, I swear. I have time in Beijing now to work on it properly and wrap up with logistics and with the music. After all that is finished I will re-focus on my acting. We’ll see.

C: I want to be an extra. LYN: Er... for extras the fee is 200RMB, sent to me. 1200RMB to me and I will include two meals. I won’t pick you up, but will send you back- to the closest bus stop. C: Ning-ge, I’ll invest 300k for your MV. LYN: Are you really investing or has chasing starts made you silly? If investing, let’s say my mv makes any revenue- you’d like a cut of the profits? But if you want to shoot a nice MV, it requires quite a bit of money. I don’t think 300k will be enough. I’m thinking of shooting two to three. C: I’ll invest 1M. LYN: I will find a staff member to contact you immediately. You can’t run, I’ve remembered your ID. I’ll find a staff to contact you and we can exchange the deposit in private. For a 1M project, you only need to give me a deposit of 200k first. C: Ning-ge, I’ll invest my charms. LYN: So what you’re trying to say that you’re too good-looking, so you want to be a part of my video and... that will be favorable for me? We’d be taking advantage of you because you’re too pretty, too beautiful?

C: Ning-ge, how about I give you 10RMB. LYN: Has the progression of my career reached a point where I need to do crowdfunding? I can’t survive on my own anymore, and if I want to do something my fans have to drum up the money? It’s not necessary. I know I’m not doing very well but I’m not that pitiful. Also, I just want to say- let me think of how I can phrase this nicely, to filter it-   LYN: ~ I think that music has always been a dream of mine. I can give everything I have to my music. You tell me you want to crowdfund in order to let me release my songs, but I think there’s no need for that. The music I release is for you to listen to, to enjoy, and to experience. If you feel anything when listening to my songs then that already is my greatest honor. That’s why, I don’t want you to give me any money. I will figure out the funding on my own. I appreciate your good intentions. You are all kind people. You all have dreams. You are good samaritans. ~ LYN: ~ I’m sure that everyone who has a dream in music who sees such a group of people who want to support their passion for music, will be moved. Thank you all. ~

- - - - - - - - - -

- /gives his support to students taking the NCEE/

C: Ning-ge, your voice is like this and you’re still streaming? LYN: ~ Honestly friends, I have to tell you, my voice is really uncomfortable today. Because for a long time I was in the South- in Hengdian- which is more humid. I’ve suddenly returned to Beijing and I haven’t quite adjusted. I have a really dry throat. I am withstanding searing pain to stream for everyone today. But I don’t want to make this a big deal. I don’t want to say that I am sick. I just want to say- that you are all very important to me. I’m willing to do this for you- ~ - /breaks character because he couldn’t stand himself/ LYN: Beijing is dry, alright? My throat is uncomfortable. I’ve been living in the South all this while- me, who originates from the North, has been living in the South. Hendgian is in Zhejiang, right? That’s south. It’s humid. So being back here now (in the North), my throat has been uncomfortable. It’s really dry. Especially Beijing, which is particularly dry. Liaoning, Dandong- where my house is- is okay, because there I am close the the river/ocean. The air isn’t as dry for a place in the Northeast. Beijing is really dry, though. I have to put on so many face masks every day. LYN: Wait for me a sec, I’ll go grab some water.

C: The chair looks nice. LYN: Are you making fun of me? This house in Beijing is rented so this furniture was all here when I got the house. I don’t have such high tastes. This is the landlord’s stuff, not mine. - C: Drink less soft drinks. LYN: This isn’t a soft drink, it’s just carbonated water. It’s carbonated, but there’s no sugar or anything in it.  - C: It’s a princess chair. LYN: /laughs/ Yes, it is. There are six of them. They were around the dinner table but I grabbed one over to sit on while I stream. I’m not in Beijing very often, anyway.

C: What special effect is this today? LYN: You can tell that this video has special effects?? This is the “aurora” effect. Why am I using it, do you know? Well- you all know what an “aurora” is, right? A very mystical phenomenon. LYN: ~ I am using this aurora effect today because I believe that not many people in this world have seen an actual aurora. Or a real rainbow. But I hope that each one of you who are in my stream can see this wonderful aurora special effect. So you can feel like you are in a faraway place- somewhere you can see the lights. ~ - bgm: Young Captain队长 & ODD Chen Sijian - 超感 (Super Sense) - LYN: But remember to tell me where I can see a rainbow. I saw one the other day- with my eyes, it was very clear. But I tried to take a picture of it on my phone and I found out- you can’t really see it.  C: Your skills aren’t good enough. / LYN: Oh. C: Change your phone. / LYN: Right, okay.

C: Have you done your physical yet? LYN: Not yet. I want to get everything arranged first and acclimate before I do it. Lately I’ve been preparing to start working out again. I want to give myself half a year’s time to start a regular eating schedule. I’ll mind what I eat- like not anything fried or sweet- and try to stick to an exercise schedule. I want to know, after this half year, what the results will be.  LYN: I really have properly started working out now. I’m not kidding anymore. My abs... I’m at... 10%. If having full-on abs is 100%, then I have at least 20% now. That is- you can see something if you squint. Let me train for a bit first. If there are results by the end of the year I’ll post up a picture. I see a lot of male artists wearing suits, right? But they don’t wear a shirt- it’s just the suit jacket- and a low middle button. I see a lot of male artists like that and I’m super jealous. They have such nice physique that allows them to wear the clothes in that way, to show a little skin. Either that or it’s a dress shirt, but the buttons are undone until the last few. The name of the game there is “Temptation/Seduction”. I can’t do that, though. If I open it up I look like a boiled chicken. LYN: I just want to have a nicer physique. I won’t make any promises from now on. I won’t bring it up again. We’ll just.. wait and see.

LYN: I was worried that I would come onto the stream today and my face would look fat. Lately I’ve been eating less but if I want to work out I have to eat more- three meals is modest. I’ve been forcing myself to eat, so I feel like I’ve gained weight. I thought it would show on the camera but it’s alright. The beauty filters are strong, after all. LYN: I had a huge bowl of rice and vegetables just earlier. But those are all regular foods. It’s alright I didn’t gain weight. // I have a performance in a couple of days, I told you about it before- some college, right?

C: Ning-ge, your hair color is makes you seem young. LYN: I don’t like the words “seem young”. I used to sell clothes, so I know all the right words to say when you’re trying to make a sale. If you say I “seem young” then that means that you don’t see me as ACTUALLY young. You don’t see me as young at all, but the words “seem young” should be allocated to 45+ year old men and women. You can use “seem young” to describe them. Okay?? You’ve just admitted that in your mind I am already... an old man.

C: Feels “youthful”! LYN: Friends, you don’t need to make forced compliments. I have a very clear image of myself and “youthful” doesn’t fit it. I told you before, that I had a script come to me and they wanted to act as a high school student for a portion of it, didn’t I? There was a plot where the two people met in high school and went to college together but later separated to start working. The majority of the plot is focused on when they are adults, but I couldn’t get past them wanting me to act as a high school student for a portion of it. Because of this, I gave up on this drama.  LYN: I can act as maybe a college student if you lay down the foundation extra thick to cover up the wrinkles. Maybe get some Thermage treatment in, and I could pass. But if you want me to act as a middle or high school student, I really can’t do it. I am 1.9m tall- when I’m not wearing shoes I’m 1.89m, but if I wear shoes I’m taller than 1.9m. It’d be okay if I were shorter but have you ever seen that tall of a high school student?? They’re already done growing! So me acting as a high school student would be a little unfitting. 

C: Kids nowadays are all tall. LYN: /laughs/ You’re right, but I still can’t do it! They might be tall but they still have young faces. My face has obviously seen time. I just can’t do it. A kid can play someone older, but someone older can’t play a kid. My face already has time on it. If you wanted me to act as someone around 30 years old or so, that wouldn’t be a problem. But early 20′s is difficult for me!

C: Ning-ge, you’re very young. Ning-ge, you can do it. LYN: I realized there’s something about this industry... let me tell you how I feel about it. People who do well in this industry- I’ve been to events, I can see who’s doing well or not- you’ll discover something. That is, no matter what they do the people around them will endlessly praise them. Really. I’m talking about people who are doing well for themselves. Their staff, the staff you meet at events- let’s say we’re at some recording for a show or an event- any staff around will give them endless praise. For example, an artist goes, “Huh? What is this, a phone? I’ve never seen one like this before. It’s called an iPhone?” The staff around them have already reached a point where they reply, “You’re so smart! Amazing! /claps/. You’ve never seen this thing before, but you knew it was a phone. You’re so great. You have a natural talent for identifying phones.” I was at the side, watching like:

LYN: But most of the time the artist will gladly accept the praise. “Oh, I just have a knack for this. :) I have an interest in mobile phones- oh, I see this is an iPhone! I’ve never seen one before, but I already know. I’m just talented. I have an interest in electronics.” !! It’s like humoring a child! And these artists aren’t young. LYN: You know- once you reach a certain point you’ll find out that the words of the people around you are 99% praise. The people close to you, as well as the people you meet. After I saw that happening I thought, “Oh~ So (that’s how it is)...” They’re probably already used to it and it doesn’t affect them at all but to me... I don’t feel a thing.  LYN: Just like when you tell me that I��m young and that I can play a middle schooler. I’ll listen to what you’re saying, but leave it at that. I might even have the passing thought that maybe you are trying to provoke me. After seeing all that, I have my own judgement on what people say to me in the future. I don’t believe that all you should hear is praise. There needs to be all sorts of comments in order to level you. Only then can you mature. Only then will you know where your limits are. LYN: That’s why when you praise and support me- of course, I like to hear it. But I don’t think there’s a need to take it seriously. There’s really no need. C: I was being honest. LYN: Even if you were, I still won’t take it seriously. I need to have self-awareness to maintain my balance. 

- - - - - - - - - -

- /saw a passing comment and makes note to answer it later, but clarifies he couldn’t really see the whole thing because the comment was too long. If they are short comments, usually he sees all of them scrolling by./ LYN: I can’t answer all of them, so please be generous. Don’t think that just because I am not replying to you, you shouldn’t comment at all. Our theme here is “company”.

C: Are there kiss scenes in ZY? LYN: What’s it to you?!? You must be crazy. XD LYN: There are no kiss scenes in ZY, only bath scenes. Of course by that I mean- a normal bath. For example, I’ll go to bathe and my bros will scrub my back for me. Scenes like that. They'll perform some gua sha and  ba guan for me. Because we’ll all get together to wash up after we go out to battle. We’re starting a “community bathing” culture. C: Such a big scale? LYN: We’re still wearing pants. If we want it to air, we’ll still be wearing pants. They’ll only show the top half. Just a bunch of guys helping to scrub each other’s backs.

C: Your ears are turning red. LYN: Why would they be??? What did I say today that would make my ears red?? You really think I’m only 18 years old?! Have you forgotten what I was trending for a while ago?? (Married) Oh-sorry. I’m... I’m not a young kid. Why I turn red from talking about washing up and scrubbing backs?? C: Now it IS red. LYN: Yeah, I misspoke earlier. My mind was running slow and my mouth too fast. I apologize. C: Drink some water to settle your mind.

C: When will YNGS air? LYN: I don’t know! :D Let me tell you friends, a lot of actors are also dumbfounded. I know you like to ask us actors when our dramas will air, but we’re in the dark and really don’t know. I’m guessing if you try to ask the production company, they wouldn’t either! Sometimes you’ll hear that a drama is airing tonight and then the next morning you find it didn’t. This is normal, so if you ask me when a drama is airing, I really don’t know. LYN: It’s been two years since I finished filming a couple of my dramas and even now I am getting notices to do voice acting or supplement for voice acting. It seems like everything is going according to plan and the OSTs are all recorded, but then... it’s just indefinitely about to air. So what time a drama airs is really hard to say. I can only tell you that I can’t tell you.

C: Do you have a variety? LYN: I do, we’ve been in talks. But I- I- Once I start in a drama crew I don’t have the time anymore. Varieties nowadays need two to three or up to seven to eight days to record. There’s no way the drama production is letting me off for that long. Especially since I am starting to accept male lead roles... So, it’s hard for me to go. The production doesn’t really give the time off. So the variety is hard to say, since I will be entering another crew soon. You all are afraid of me wasting my time at home, and desperately want me to enter a crew. Don’t worry. I know what I’m doing. You’ll see. When I pick projects, they’re usually dependable. If any news gets announced I’m sure you will be happy for me. I won’t be sitting around at home. C: Is it a modern or historical? LYN: Which one are you referring to? Are you talking about the one in the latter half of next year? That one... hasn’t come yet. Let me pretend. // This is called “I’ve been home too long and now I’m making fantasies”. I clearly don’t have work but I’m pretending I do. There are some people like that, and I am one of them.

LYN: If you don’t quite understand me, let me explain. I’m a workaholic, I really am. Just look at how I spent the past five years. I started off singing on the streets and slowly made myself internet famous. After that, I became a singer. Now I’m starting to be an actor. I’ve made it this far step by step. Do you think, if I took even one moment to rest in these past five years, I would have been able to make it to where I am today? Getting to work with all these comparative (to me) amazing people? I don’t want to say that I am putting a lot of effort into this; I just want you to know that I don’t want to let myself rest. I want to learn quickly how to make my way in this industry.  LYN: The people I’m working with now are all amazing, right? I started off as a busker on the streets. In order for me to make it here, if I rested at all in the past five years do you think I would have been able to walk this far? I don’t have a company backing me. I only have this group of fans who have kept me company all this way. I don’t have a company (公司/gong si), only fans (粉丝/fen si). LYN: I’m the type of person who gets anxious if they don’t have work. My old fans all know this. But can you see me being anxious right now? If I didn’t have work, and I hadn’t decided my next drama or made plans for the future- I’d be having a breakdown. Do you think I’d be sitting here so calmly, discussing this with you? I’d be here complaining, not telling you jokes. LYN: So, you can tell by my mood. If I’m relaxed then I have plans in place. Lately I’ve taken a break because I really do want to work on my album. It’s not like an OST, where I can just take a song someone else has written if I like it and just record a song and release it. Albums are complicated. The process of collecting songs alone is difficult. Another thing about me is that I don’t want the songs on my album to be like songs I’ve sung for OSTs. I’ve accepted many OSTs that I really like a lot. But if there are songs on my album that are no different from the OSTs then I’ll think, “What’s the point of releasing this song? This is exactly like an OST I can sing.” Choosing the music is hard. I hear too many songs every year, so it’s hard to pick one I really like. I’m really working on the album. LYN: I’m also going to start the voice acting for YNGS. I’m going to plan to give them 10 days for recording. For example, I’d go in at 10a-1p, grab a bite, then start again at 4-5p until 7-8p. It’ll be like working a regular job, for about 10 days. I want to get the voice acting finished in the coming week. I also have some OSTs I need to record and events to attend. I won’t be idle. Don’t worry- you don’t need to be anxious for me. LYN: Oh- I don’t need fan support for voice acting. Just want to let you know. If I go to the recording studio and there’s a group of you with banners chanting our fan motto... it’s not necessary. I just need to do my job and that’s it. LYN: Maybe in a few days when I go to the hospital for my physical, you can come give me fan support then. /laughs/ You can stand by the entrance and shout, “LYN, good luck on your physical!” or something like that.  C: Steal urine. LYN: ?? What does that mean? Are you a pervert?? You must be. I told you I was going in for my physical and you said you want to steal (my) urine?? /barfing sounds/ LYN: Unreasonable. Truly unreasonable. Oh my goodness. This is too perverse. C: Extreme sasaeng behavior. LYN: This isn’t even sasaeng behavior anymore. This is... /barfs/

C: Can you turn the lyrics off? LYN: What- what, are the lyrics blocking your sight to something? How about I make it smaller? This is fine, right? /sigh/ I’ll turn it off. Save you some face.

- - - - - - - - - -

-- break #1 (his friend is having a baby and he needs to take a look) LYN: Excuse me friends, I made you wait long. I’m back. Lao Wang had a son a while back, this time he had a daughter. It’s nice. C: Are they good-looking? LYN: Not better than me. /laughs/ Why does that feel low- I’m competing in looks with a child?? C: How many days apart are they? LYN: The last time they had a kid was... three months ago. Now they have another. It’s amazing.

C: You look young. You can go act as a middle schooler. LYN: Let me tell you, friends- lately I’ve been thinking I want to start “pan chuan” (counting prayer beads (?)). I just think it’s cool. I think it’s fun. Watching the string change over time is interesting. But then I was thinking, if I started to do this, wouldn’t it prove that I am crossing another...I can’t say “realm”, can I? I’m entering into the meditative mind and healthy body category. But my current category is as a “Disney-lover”! C: I’ve been doing this for many years already. LYN: Which means to say your age... is probably around mine, right? C: Elementary kids do this, too. LYN: Do they? I didn’t know. But I really bought a string online and later I’ll... play with them. // I met someone not too long ago, and they told me they had nothing fun to do. I suggested they count beads and they said that they didn’t want to because if they did that, they would enter into the “middle-aged” mindset. That’s how they described it, at least. I thought about it and... yeah, they were right. But if you’re telling me that even elementary kids are doing this now, then I think that this is the popular trend for now. Then, we’ll count! C: Don’t count them, “pan” me. LYN: Do you want to “chuan”?? // Wait- sorry. That sounds like a curse word. That is- Sorry. - /clears his throat and skips the topic/ ;; t/n: there’s some wordplay here, but idk LYN: I won’t. I seriously did research on this and these things need a high density. You’re probably not dense enough. Also there’s a process of going from white, to colored (oxidized), and then opened (?). I don’t really want to see you “colored”. I think I’ll forget it. You can “pan” yourself in the mirror. I won’t be participating.

C: Watch out for tendonitis. LYN: What do you mean- like when I’m moving them, this part of my hand is likely to get tendonitis? I’ll buy a machine to turn them. I saw that there are those things online. / Oh, was it “tenosynovitis”? Sorry, I read wrong. / But there are machines for this, so I was thinking of getting one. I won’t have to use my own hands. I won’t get tenosynovitis, it’s okay. // There’s another machine, where you can take each of the beads and there’s like a tube- you can put the bead inside and it will spin.

C: Nine-ge, don’t wash your face in the morning just take the beads and rub them on your face. LYN: Why are you so dirty? That would be so gross. We want the bead’s natural oils. Maybe this topic is not interesting to many females, but we want the bead’s natural oils, not your dirty face oils. That’s no good. Forget it, let’s not.

C: Tell Daimi to count them for you. LYN: Daimi? I’d be lucky if she didn’t take them for peanuts and eat them. 

LYN: I thought you wouldn’t be interested, but it seems like a lot of you women- and men, there are bound to be men here too, right? - you all like to play with this. When my string arrives, will we be considered “pan”you? [t/n: play on the word “friends” (peng you)] Or “chuan-you”? I don’t know. We can discuss it. LYN: I didn’t know elementary school kids were interested in this, too. I honestly don’t know too much about it myself. There aren’t many grade schoolers in the group of friends around me to begin with. So I’m not sure what they’re into these days.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: Is your dog male or female? LYN: She’s a girl. I won’t own boy dogs. I used to own a boy dog, a long time ago. I took him out for a walk and all of a sudden he set his eyes on another dog and took off. He was a bigger breed- a sheepdog (Scotch Collie). He took the leash and started chasing a female dog. I ran across 8 hilltops- I was walking him up in the middle of nowhere- it was up in the mountains, and there were giant storehouses. He took the leash and ran and I chased him across three hilltops. I was this close to a breakdown, I almost threw up and I couldn’t catch him. I lost him and it scared me so much. Even /I/ got lost in the chase, because I wasn’t familiar with the area. I was chasing my dog, and my dog was chasing another dog. After all the running I lost the dog AND my way. I ran for about ten+ minutes. Do you know how helpless I felt, surrounded by unfamiliar terrain, lost dog and lost way? So ever since then I learned my lesson for having boy dogs. LYN: After that I only ever owned girl dogs. Youmi... Daimi... and there’s was also a cocker spaniel, whose name was also Youmi. I had two dogs named Youmi. The original had died, so I bought another one immediately so the love could be transferred. [t/n: if I recall, he didn’t want his grandparents to be too sad that Youmi (original) had passed away.]  LYN: All female dogs.

C: Did you ever find him? LYN: Later, he came back on his own. It took ME a while to find the way back home- I really ran across three hills before I found the path and went home by myself. I went home and cried to my mom that I had lost the dog and that I almost got lost. But when it came around nighttime, he came back on his own. That dog was so smart. People could hold his leash as long as I was there, but if I wasn’t he would go crazy. He was so smart. But in the end that dog... you probably know how it went. He ran away. That’s why people tell you- you can’t trust men. If they so something wrong once, they’ll do it a second time. He ran away, and didn’t come back this time. C: It was a BE. LYN: That’s an appropriate description, yes. At the time I was really sad about it, I cried for a few days and didn’t own a dog for a long time after.

C: He went to become someone’s son-in-law. LYN: He was a really handsome dog, but unfortunately I don’t have any pictures of him. You know sheepdogs- they have long snouts and long hair. Usually they’re all cream and black, or brown, right? But he was black and white. If there were a litter- only one of them would be patterned like that. It was so pretty. LYN: ! He wasn’t a Border Collie, though. I know what you’re talking about- Borders are black and white. He was a Scotch Collie, but black and white. Wow, he was so handsome. // I know the difference between a Border and a Scotch. He was the only one of the litter with that coloring- he was very unique. Very special.

C: What breed was Youmi? LYN: The first was a cocker spaniel. The second was a toy poodle. The one now is a schnauzer. After raising the cocker first, I discovered it was better to own a dog that didn’t shed as much. Schnauzers don’t shed as much- only the undercoat- and nor do toy poodles. These dogs are easy to clean up after, they’re small and smart, and don’t need to be walked as much.

C: Why don’t you like big dogs? LYN: Wait- look, I just said that I liked dogs that don’t shed as much and someone in the chat said, “Ning-ge, I also don’t shed a lot. Raise me.”  I’m guessing in not too long someone is going to pick up on this topic. LYN: Don’t you lose hair? I don’t believe there’s one person here who can say they don’t shed hair. We all do, more or less.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: Ning-ge, this special effect looks like “spitting pies”. LYN: ?? What is that? There are small orbs flying at you, so you think I’m “spitting pies”? I don’t always make “pies” (pipe-dreams). When have I made a pie for you? There aren’t many. The first is my abs- that’s going to be fulfilled this year, isn’t it?  C: “Stream until we throw up.” LYN: It counts if I do, too. Someone earlier wanted to steal something of mine, didn’t they? I threw up, then. If I throw up it counts too.

LYN: I saw a comment in the group chat that read, “Ning-ge is streaming today. If someone pushes him to stop streaming, I curse them to eat instant noodles without the seasonings forever.”

C: Disney stream; Carnation Festival 3.5. LYN: I had explanations for those, didn’t I? I told you about the Disney stream the last time- it’s not convenient for me to stream at the park. It was going to be okay, but lately their business has been booming. It became inconvenient for me to stream at the park because we wanted to avoid any unnecessary crowding. C: Recipe for marinating meat skewers. LYN: I’ve been busy lately... watching dramas, going to concerts... XD I’ve been busy with that lately. As for the grilling recipe, I’ll see if there’s a time I want to go out and relax. Maybe when I’m done with voice acting for Ning Yuanzhou- I’ll film a video, then. LYN: I saw someone asking me where I’ve been- I’ve really been busy as of late. And this work isn’t on a set schedule.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: After going back to Beijing you look more lively. LYN: I’ve been in Hengdian for so long that I’ve felt stifled. I honestly really like Hengdian, but the problem is- it’s a town. There’s nothing wrong with it, it’s just very small. It’s mostly the food- I’ve had so much of it! All the restaurants and take-out... I’ve been there for three years. Think about exactly how many good restaurants there can be. I’ve already eaten my fill. Also, there’s no place I can shop around! Sometimes I like shopping and buying clothes- give myself some motivation to keep working hard. I’ll go shop and say, “Wow, these clothes are so expensive! These shoes are expensive! I should buy them. Then, I can continue to work hard so I can afford them.” That’s what I do when I shop. LYN: I like living in the city. I can eat whatever I want, whether that’s skewers, hot pot, stir fry, Shanghai cuisine, Hangzhou cuisine, etc. I have choices. But the problem is that in Hengdian, there are only so many shops. You don’t really have a choice. All I did there was eat. I felt like I had enough. But after coming back to Beijing- there’s nothing really fun to do here, either, but- at least I can shop. As for “play” I like... arcades. Last time I was in Beijing I played with VR or escape rooms- those are fun. 

C: ZXD-laoshi is here. LYN: Welcome.

- /talks a little more about what he’d like to do in Beijing while he can experience the freedom of having choices: to eat/shop/play./ LYN: I’ve just been in Hengdian too long. Now that I’m back here I’m letting myself go, a little. I like the feeling of living in a big city. I like the bustle. I’ve asked my friends before, where they like to go for travel.One of them told me they go on hikes- to see the mountains and watch the rivers; how on the way there’s a part of the river that’s really beautiful. After hearing that, I didn’t have any reaction/feeling for it. They in turn asked me where I like to go for fun. I told them I like to go to Shanghai, Beijing, Hangzhou. They replied, “You’re not going there to work, are you?” LYN: I’m just the type of person who has to come to a bustling/busy place to relax. Why? Because my hometown is a tourist city I’ve grown up along the river bank. Behind my house is a mountain. I would ride my bike along the river to work everyday. Do you think I’m missing any opportunity to see the mountains and rivers? My home is a tourist city and I’ve grown up seeing the mountains and rivers. Now I’ve finally entered society and am doing well for myself, do you really think I want to return to see the mountains and rivers in my downtime? I’ve never seen such a flourishing city when I was little. I like the hustle and bustle of the city. I don’t want to go back to see mountains and rivers- I’ve seen enough. LYN: It’s been thirty years and I finally made it to a big city. Now you want me to go back? You’ll find that a lot of people- once they become wealthy, they want to “return to the natural state”. They’ve had enough of the luxurious meals, and now they want to go back to the simple things. But friends, I’ve had the simple things all along. I can finally eat meat, have the chance to have abalone, and you want me to go back? It doesn’t agree with my plans.

C: You’re trending. LYN: Really? :) I don’t believe. I don’t deserve it. LYN: LYN, trending? I don’t think he’s worthy. C: The Entertainment Tab. LYN: What’s wrong with that? C: #41. -- 我不配 (I’m Not Worthy) LYN: A sang a whole verse of this song just for those three words. (I’m not worthy.)

LYN: I’m trending, though? ~ Honestly, I think that being trending or not isn’t important. I think the most important thing is that if by being here streaming, I am able to bring to you some happiness. As a singer or an actor, the most important thing is to have good works for you. A trending topic is not something an artist- whether singer or actor- should be in pursuit of. You need to have truly good works, works you’ve put your heart into, works that can touch other people’s hearts- to give to everyone who supports you. That is what you, as an artist, should be pursuing. So this trending topic... is nice to have, but it’s not a big deal if I don’t. Friends, let’s let our work do the talking. ~  LYN: Who doesn’t know how to say nice things? Those are the basics, aren’t they?

bgm: Ice Paper -  夜泊秦淮 (Ye Po Qin Huai)

C: I learned. Thank you, laoshi. LYN: Are you an artist? If you aren’t then there’s no use in you learning this. Do you want to be celebrity??

- - - - - - - - - -

C: You have too many buttons. LYN: ... Okay. I’ll listen to you. Next time I’ll buy a shirt with a zipper. This shirt if full of buttons. If you think they’re too much, then from now on I’ll buy shirts with zippers. I think they exist- I’ve worn one before. LYN: Don’t think I don’t know what you’re thinking. We are just a normal stream. I am a singer/actor. This can ONLY be a normal stream. Or are you telling me that you want to see something immoral in my VERY MORAL stream?? I see right through you. I’ve already turned of the gifting option, so there’s no paid content here. I don’t try to sell you products, either. There’s no way you’re seeing any paid content.  C: No~ That’s not what we were intending. We’re just afraid that you’re hot. LYN: I have an air conditioner. It can make the room 1° in a second. I’ll turn it on blast. I don’t need you to worry. I’m not hot. Later I’m going to put on a down jacket.

C: You’re so hot that your face is protruding oil. LYN: This has nothing to do with the heat. I just have naturally oily skin. I even looked it up online: Is it bad to have oily skin? I went to look up the pros and cons. The con is that I am more likely to produce oils and accumulate sebum on my face. Now I have to advise you to use this very good selfie stick- lol. No, I’m not going to push any products on you. It’s just that if you produce too many facial oils, your pores are more likely to become blocked and get acne. But the pro is that you don’t appear to age as quickly. That’s just what I need. I only just started taking male lead roles in the past two years. I really hope I can film a few more. LYN: There were some people trying to advise me, “LYN, can you stop playing male lead roles? We can accept you playing second male lead, but not main.” I can’t make that promise. Because... I have oily skin. I want to make the most of it and shoot a few more male lead dramas while I can. Is that okay? Please, I’m begging you. Stop trying to talk me out of it. I can’t promise you on this, but maybe on other things. Like that person earlier who said that I had too many buttons- I promised them that next time I would wear a shirt with a zipper. But on not playing the male lead, I can’t promise. I’m sorry. I’m the type of person who can understand and consider everyone’s feelings, but your feelings are... not feelings but gutsy demands. [t/n: this is a play on words.] I can’t promise you.

LYN: I really did see a comment like that, though. “LYN, can you stop playing male leads? I can accept second male lead but not main. I can’t stand it. I’m throwing up.” /laughs/ When I see comments like that, friends, it makes me happy. Do you know why? This is the mindset and logic you should have in order to keep living. LYN: At the very beginning when I wanted to be a singer, people were telling me, “You’re just internet famous, what makes you think you can be a singer? What do you think you’re doing on stage competing with other singers? You’re just internet famous- go back to your streaming room.” After a few years, I’ve finally made it as a singer- something people acknowledge me as, and now I’ve gone into acting. People said, “Why are you acting? You’re just a singer- just do your jobs and sing your songs. You don’t know your limits. What are you doing trying to be an actor? Other people have studied for so many years at a performing arts school and can’t find a role. What are you, a singer, doing acting? That’s ridiculous. Just because you have some fans doesn’t mean you can be an actor.” Some time passes again. “Why are you acting as the male lead? Just stay the second male lead!” LYN: You know? Unreasonably, they are- step by step- continuing to acknowledge me. So the fact that they have already accepted me as an actor makes me very happy. LYN: No matter what industry you’re working in, you have to have a good mindset. You have to consider things from all sorts of points of view. You can’t make trouble. If you live thinking, “Why are they saying this about me? I only want to be a singer... /cries/” It won’t help you. No one will pity you. Friends, you have to learn this in your lives as well. Don’t complain. You can, but not all the time. There’s no use. Complaining all the time will only degrade you. You have to think about making a place for yourself. You have to use your brain. Make your words powerful. Move forward. Alright? - C: /tries to make a joke on the word “complain” (bào yuàn)/ LYN: You don’t perhaps think that you’re very funny, do you? I hope not.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: We’re listening to music now. LYN: Yeah. I’m your music DJ, Modern Brothers Xiao Ning.

C: How long will you stream until? LYN: I don’t know. I’ll just keep streaming and stop when I’m tired. I’ll continue to stream for now. My stream doesn’t really have specific content or fixed rules that state I have to promote something. But, I do want to recommend something to you... hold on. LYN: ! Attention, attention! We have some good news! Tomorrow, Modern Brothers Liu Yuning’s song “The Remaining Life (余生)” will be online. This song is the ending theme from the drama “Gone with the Rain” (微雨燕双飞). The broadcasting station- everyone listen up- is Youku! This song will be online tomorrow- I hope that when it’s up you all can take a listen. Thank you! ! LYN: That wasn’t too much, was it? But it’s true that I sang the OST and they paid me for it... My main thing is price:product ratio. We deal in after-sales services, here. Tomorrow the very good drama Gone with the Rain will be airing- please watch it. Back from the Brink is also still airing. If you haven’t checked that out yet, please do. 

C: Promote all of your OSTs that way in the future. LYN: I’ve always promoted them this way. You must be new here. If you want to be able to get along with people in this industry, you have to know where you can fit into the ecosystem. For me, I am good with after-sales services. All of you are consumers. You might be looking for me to sing an OST, a platform, or brand. All of them are consumers. To a consumer, what is the most important aspect of a product? The first is good quality. The second is having something you can really make use of. The last is everything that comes after- the maintenance and upkeep. The after-sales services. As long as the after-sales is done right, and customer service is done right, you will always have good business. Remember that. C: Ning-ge, you’re a 4S shop now? LYN: I’m an OST shop. Mine is different from a $s shop- as long as you maintain upkeep everything is fine. But OSTs are a single-use thing. They don’t need upkeep. The OST doesn’t come back to me to change its engine oil or brakes. I don’t need to so anything after. It’s a single-use product that you can have for a lifetime. In terms of quality, it’s a treasure. I will definitely sing it to the best of my ability- as long as I can, I will but 110% into singing it. Secondly it’s single use, but it’s not as if you can keep listening to the song and then later think that it’s no good. I want to deliver a good price:product ratio, and you never have to worry about after-sales services here.  LYN: My after-sales does not only include promotion of the song and drama during my streams, but also when I attend galas. That is, it’s entirely possible that this song will come up again during my performances. It will be repeatedly broadcast to everyone. This way, we can keep reminding people of the drama. Give them something to remember the drama by. That’s my price:product ratio.

C: How much is it to advertise? LYN: It’s free for the consumer. All after-sales is on my own dime. There’s not much expense that goes into it, I just spend a little more time talking. Honestly, it’s just money for toothpaste and toothbrush. XD Other than that, there are no other expenses. I don’t collect more fees.

C: What are your rates? LYN: I get paid for OSTs like this, friends. It’s calculated by- what’s it to you?? You’re inquiring about my worth, now? How amusing. LYN: I hate these types of people! The ones who don’t buy anything, but ask about the price first! How annoying! // If you’re not going to buy anything, don’t ask! If you’re going to buy something then just buy it. If you’re not, then why are you asking??  LYN: XD I don’t know why, suddenly I went crazy. But anyway, don’t ask- that’s a business secret, I can’t just tell you. But as to whether it’s expensive or not... I can only tell you, it’s not cheap. :)

C: A business secret? LYN: It’s not a secret. It’s just that my group and I have been working for such a long time together, plus the fact that I’m my own boss. For a lot of things, I don’t need to follow a set business practice. I’m not doing things to further my company- like accepting jobs in order to pay my employees. I haven’t reached that point because I don’t have many employees to begin with. It’s mostly just me- and I can do a lot of things at once. Like promotions- I can do 30% of the work on my own. That means I can afford to hire one person less, right? This applies to other parts of the business as well. We don’t need to accept any jobs I don’t want to in order to further development.  LYN: When I get OSTs, it goes through this process: 1. What drama is it for?, 2. What platform is it airing on?, 3. I’ll listen to the demo. Of course, the song is always the most important but I have to understand the project first. If I like the song, I’ll accept. If I don’t like it, it doesn’t matter how much they offer. It has nothing to do with the money- if I don’t like it, I just won’t accept the job. The first step is never to ask about the price. I’ve encountered companies that started off like that, but I felt that approach is very... I don’t want to comment. For the most part, people usually do not ask about the price from the start. Usually it’s introducing the project and sending a song demo. If you like it, we’ll negotiate the price. If I don’t want to accept the job in the first place, there’s no point in asking how much they can offer me.

C: They’re afraid they can’t afford you. LYN: The investment in making a drama is very huge. At the least it’s tens of millions and at the most it’s a couple billion. They’re not lacking the funds. It’s not as if a single song will break the bank.

C: Then, do you have a discount for OSTs on 6/18? LYN: Do you need a discount for my OSTs? Oh my goodness... Okay, let’s do this. There might be some video production bosses in my stream now. I have a discount on OSTs on 6/18. If you buy 300RMB’s worth, you’ll get 20RMB off. Alright? If you want OSTs, please place your orders on 6/18.  C: The second song half off. LYN: No, that’s not worth it. Each song is its own price. C: Buy 300RMB for 20% off. Can the discounts stack?  LYN: So you mean, if a song were 600RMB instead of 300RMB? If it’s 300, you get 20 off, so if a song were 600, you’d get 40RMB off? Is that what you mean? You can do that. It stacks. 

C: Ning-ge, don’t say any more. If you keep on, you’ll be at a loss. LYN: This friend is considering it from my point of view. That if I let the discount stack, then I would lose out. They’re looking out for me and letting me know I would lose profit, right? LYN: ~ Actually when I hear you say that, I’m touched. I think this friend is a really honest person. In such a chaotic world, you really need to cherish when you meet such a person. Even if I make good on my word and let you take 20RMB off of 300RMB on my OSTs, have you ever encountered such a sale in the real world... but the caveat is that they raised the original price? Then, in fact, though they are selling very many- it’s at even more expensive prices than usual, disguised as a sale. Of course, I wouldn’t do that to you. ~

- - - - - - - - - -

-- break #2 (no excuse, he just needs to use the restroom) LYN: You’re still commenting on this “spitting pies” effect, so I’ll change it for you. I have a “ghost story” effect, do you want to see it? :) LYN: But there are a lot of women in my stream, I’m afraid that they will be scared. If I put on this effect they might get so frightened they will cry. It needs to be paired with music so that you can feel the chill. Let’s play this. It’s not very frightening, don’t be scared. LYN:  It’s not as scary as you think! If it’s too scary my weibo will be in violation. I’m an old streamer already, I understand this much better than you do. It can’t be too scary- no blood or jump-scares here. The “scary” I’m talking about is not the “scary” that you are thinking of. I was just exaggerating. You need only believe 20% of what I say. LYN: Alright. Three, two, one- - /error/ LYN: It’s not supported? Why is it telling me that?? Huh? What’s happening? LYN: Oh, well. It’s not supported. This is a flop. // ?? But I tested it out today and it was working?? /clicking around/ Oh, it’s this one. It’s not scary, though.

LYN: It wasn’t scary. C: What was that? Failing eyesight? // That was it? LYN: Friends, if you’re going to be like that then I’ll do a super scary one! I’ll make you cry in fright!! Friends, I’ll show you what is truly “terrifying”! Let’s do it, I’ll play a quieter song, otherwise the mood will be wrong. Friends. Three, two- I’ll let you see the scariest thing in the world! THree, two, one! - /error/ LYN: ?! “The special effect is unsupported.” /feeling stifled/ Okay, I found one equally as scary. Let’s try again. Three, two, one!

LYN: Sorry, it flopped. The stream doesn’t support the effect. Because this is on a horizontal screen. Next time if I’m streaming vertically, I’ll show you the terror.  LYN: There are a lot of different ones I can use, though. /shows them off/

LYN: /laughs/ What IS THIS??? This one really IS terrifying. Oh my goodness...

- - - - - - - - - -

- /someone tells him he's trending, still. but only in the entertainment tab. he thanks everyone for the trending topic anyway./  LYN: I was wondering what you were talking about- I almost threw my phone. [t/n: bc they told him he was trending, but he couldn’t find it on the main page. XD]

LYN: I feel like my face is very bright. Maybe this is TOO MUCH oil. Let me find some blotting paper. This is too much. I know we were talking about oily skin types earlier but this is too much- I look greasy. LYN: Is it better now? Not as greasy? C: Ning-ge, that’s called dewy skin. LYN: No, it’s just grease. That’s how you can tell a household is wealthy. I remember a story I was told when I was little. There was someone very poor, who wanted to pass themselves off as wealthy. They would take a piece of pork lard and rub it on their face before they went out. When they went out, they could say that they had just eaten. It would make it seem as if the household was wealthy enough to eat meat. I am like that, too.

C: You haven’t changed the special effect. LYN: It’s alright. This one is plenty scary enough.

C: Ning-ge, you’ve played this song so much I know how to sing it. LYN: Come here and sing it, then. Sing. Come on, sing! I thought you knew how?? I gave you the mic, but you can’t sing it, huh. C: Connect the mic. LYN: Er... /shaky sigh/ Connecting the mic... uh... The thing is weibo streaming is not as complete on desktop. If I were streaming from my phone, we could connect- it has that capability- but the desktop doesn’t. If one day I stream from my phone, I’ll spend that whole day connecting the mic with you all. We’ll chat. We can give it a try.

C: Is that a pie, too? LYN: It’s not a pie! It’s just because when I was connecting with people before, they didn’t want to. I didn’t see the harm in it, I just wanted to get some interaction, to play. I wanted to be different from others. We can chat and communicate, because I see people connecting mics often. It’s an effect of streaming and a mood maker. There’s no reason why we can’t. But the prerequisite is that I have to connect with a “normal” person. Otherwise, it’s quite fun. Even if you aren’t my fan, you can come chat with me. It’ll make the stream more meaningful. If I happen to accidentally connect with an anti, like the type who want to curse me out- no, not those- like the kind who wants to back-talk me. I really hope I can meet someone like that. We can chat. I want to see if I can win over them, and make them my fan. LYN: I’m someone who’s really good at arguing. /laughs/ Back when I was working in the restaurant if colleagues were fighting or talking about some logic, I was amazing. It was like a debate- I could lay out all the logic for them. But it’s been many years since I last dared to fight with someone. I want to test if I am still able to. Of course, not the type of fighting by cursing, but teaching you a lesson within the realm of reason.

C: Have your skills regressed? LYN: I think they have. Because at this point a lot of things don’t matter anymore- it doesn’t matter if I win or lose. Not to say that it’s not important... it’s very unimportant. If it doesn’t concern me directly, I don’t see the need to make it a focus for my attention. There’s no meaning in that. Sometimes I might mention a topic in passing during my stream- and that’s only because they became a topic of conversation. Otherwise what else would I talk to you about? You can say that I look young. I say thank you. Then what else? LYN: I’ll talk about a lot of things during my streams, but not because I care about them- though there ARE the ones I DO care about... It’s just because they become a topic for conversation. I can turn them into jokes and tell you about them during my stream. You find it interesting, and we can have a common ground.

C: Ge, you’re trending. LYN: Someone already told me. Entertainment, #31. It’s alright. Let’s be low-key. You don’t need to promote it. Being #31 on the Entertainment Tab means that people can get jealous. (sarcasm)

LYN: Let me go grab something to drink. I left earlier and saw someone say, “I can see the princess chair again!” LYN: I’m back. I told you before, this is part of a set of chairs at the dinner table and I grabbed this one to sit on. This is a rented house, so this is all the original furniture.

LYN: Drinking coffee at this time of night is okay, right? C: You’re not going to be able to sleep. LYN: No, it’s because when you talk too much there’s too much information and it jumbles my thinking. Drinking coffee will help me focus. You’ll notice that many people do their work in a coffee shop. Did you think that they had no place else to work? There is that possibility, of course. But it’s more because the coffee can help them focus. I have to stream, so I need to focus. C: It doesn’t look like coffee though? LYN: What does it look like then, herbal medicine? I don’t have enough energy to stream, so I need to drink herbal medicine to supplement my stamina? Shan yao, dang gui, and goji?

C: Ning-ge, are your glasses magnifying? LYN: /sigh/ Do you mean to say that my eyes are so small that I’ve purposely replaced the lenses with something that will magnify and make my eyes look bigger, as a sort of physical beauty filter? To make my eyes look bigger? Is that what you mean? I can make my eyes big- they’re not always small. /opens his eyes wider/ Are they small? No. LYN: I’ve worn these glasses today to go with the rest of my outfit. It’s not because I’ve replaced them with magnifying lenses to make my eyes look bigger. That’s hurtful. You’ve hurt me. :( LYN: See, who ISN’T cyber-bullied? I was just streaming, doing nothing- not trying to sell you anything or take your money- and I’ve still been cyber-bullied. They made fun of me and said my eyes are small. Friends, cyber-bullying is a real and scary thing. I’m not kidding. LYN: ! You’re laughing?? It makes me want to sing a song... “You’ve hurt me and played it off with a laugh.” I told you it hurt me, and you’re laughing?? -- 一笑而过 (Laugh it Off) [Na Ying] C: Sing it. LYN: I want to sing something different. I want to sing something more tender. Something that can promote love. Promote positive feelings. Let’s do it.

C: Ning-ge, what is the correct way to address cyber-bullying? LYN: For this, you should go baidu it. I can’t give you a proper answer. Everyone faces it differently. I don’t have the correct answer, but I still think you need to become stronger. If you become stronger, you won’t consider it as bullying. Let’s say you’re learning martial arts and are at the top of the game and someone punches you- you’ll think nothing of it. But if you are someone who does not work out at all and someone punches you- you’re going to get knocked out. But these punches carry the same amount of force. I can’t give you a correct answer, because this depends from person to person. The only thing I can tell you is to make your heart/mind stronger. For all else, abide by the law.

-- 這世界那麼多人 (Empty World) [Karen Mok] C: So gentle you don’t seem like yourself. LYN: Do you know why I was so gentle? Because this song is in the female key. So I could only sing it an octave lower. I can’t not be gentle. If I weren’t then I wouldn’t be able to sing the song. LYN: “So gentle you don’t seem like yourself”... so does that mean that usually in your eyes I am very... callous? No, right? I still LOOK upstanding though, right?

LYN: I used to listen to very loud or noisy songs. But lately I feel I enjoy listening to slow songs more. I imagine I have a glass of red wine, just sitting there listening to slow songs. I can’t say I’m emo, but I am in a very comfortable state. That’s a different way to relax. C: That means you’ve gotten older. LYN: /laughs/ I like listening to slow and gentle songs and that means I’m getting older?? What are you talking about? The songs I’m talking about are MBY’s. Not only have you offended me, you’ve offended everyone who listen to his songs. Let me sing one of his. I didn’t go to his concert for nothing; I came back having learned a song. LYN: What does “No lyrics yet” mean??? MBY, as a singer, is popular enough (to have lyrics) isn’t he? What else do you want?? How can you tell me you don’t have the lyrics? // It’s because I’ve selected the arrangement and since that’s the case the program can’t find the lyrics.  LYN: tsk. /sigh/ Fine, I'll find the lyrics on my phone. C: Ning-ge, didn’t you say you learned it? LYN: That doesn’t mean I have to REMEMBER THE LYRICS, though?? What I meant by “learned” is that I learned the melody. I learned the melody, not how to recite the song. LYN: The lyrics: “Every morning I wake up naturally at 7:30a. The wind chimes are ringing and the clouds are light.” He wrote his own lyrics, too. How well written! -- 平凡的一天 (Ordinary Day) [Mao Buyi] LYN: It’s not because I’m getting old. Just sometimes I think that a nice and quiet song is good to listen to. Of course, I still like those noisy and loud songs. They just give a different feeling. 

C: Sing one of Xue Zhiqian’s. LYN: Do I have to sing a song from all the popular male artists now? XZQ... I really don’t know his newer songs... /ning-ge.jpg/ Also all of his songs are very difficult to sing. I’m afraid to insult his works. Let me search. I’ll sing something for fun. Everything I sing during my streams are for fun. -- 我好像在哪見過你 (I Seem to Have Seen You Somewhere) [Xue Zhiqian] LYN: /shakes his head, no/ I don’t know this one. I’ve heard it before, though. It’s been such a long time since I last sang one of his songs. I used to all the time. I really like him. But it’s been a long time... Let me find an old song that I still remember. -- 方圆几里 (Within a Few Miles) LYN: I think I can do this one. C: 刚刚好 (Just Right) LYN: Let me listen. I used to be able to sing this, but I’ve forgotten now... // I know this one. I’ll sing it. -- 刚刚好 (Just Right) (Take 1) - /sings the first couple of lines/ LYN: Oh, this song! I was bragging to you earlier that I had improved, but I actually forgot a song I used to know before! Excuse me. I’ve sung this before, on a show. Let’s try that again. -- 刚刚好 (Just Right) (Take 2) LYN: It’s been such a long time since I sang this song. I suddenly remembered that I’ve sung it before. So... oh. But it’s already been 5 years since then. Thank you, XZQ-laoshi.

C: I’m dizzy now because of your swaying. LYN: If you’re going to say that, then I have no choice but to turn your words back on you. You’re getting old. What if one day we meet up at an amusement park. If you’re already dizzy after this bit of swaying, then you won’t be able to enjoy any rides with me. Your ticket will go to waste.

LYN: Now let’s find one of Zhou Shen-laoshi’s songs. I said in a stream before, that I would never sing one of ZS or Wu Qingfeng’s songs again. Their songs, to me, have it out for my life. I really can’t sing them. We don’t sing the same type of songs. I really can’t do it. But today, I want to give it a try. Friends, wait for me. I’ll go to the restroom and come back and then find a song to fight for my life with. I’ll find a very high song and lower it an octave to sing. - /singing Big Fish, but kinda scarily XD/ LYN: He’s singing about big fish in the ocean, but we’re talking about fish in the deep sea. He’s on top of the water, but I’m on the ocean floor. Where there are lantern fish. Deep pressure.

LYN: Let me play a video for you. I think I’m running out. I don’t have any new ones to play for you. Later I’ll download some more. Make do for now. Wait for me. -- break #3

- - - - - - - - - -

LYN: Alright, I’m back. C: Sing one of WQF’s.  LYN: Later I’ll pick one to try. Of course, I did see the comment telling me to sing my own songs. I’ll sing them, but I’m sure that my fans always hear my songs and are used to them. The other thing is, I just sing for fun in my streams. I’m not here to show off myself. I’m not here trying to gain OST work by showing you what I’ve got. My stream is here for company. I want to sing, play, and chat with you. That’s all there is to it. You don’t need to make it too complicated. No matter whose songs I sing, it’s a show of respect, right? It proves that I listen to and like their songs. Right? I’m paying my respects. The original will always be yyds, of course. So.. this is just for entertainment. LYN: Keep me company. It’s a... Tuesday night. We can play and have some fun. Let me find one of ZS’s songs... I’ll see if it has a track. -- 光亮 (Silver Lining) LYN: /misses the timing to start/ Is it really in such a high key?? This is too high, isn’t it? I was listening to the beginning chords and going over the key in my head. It’s already... up high. // Let me try lowering it an octave.  LYN: ... LYN: How about this- for the places I CAN sing in the normal key, I will. Once it gets too high I’ll switch to a lower octave. This is one method... Let’s try. -- 光亮 (Silver Lining)

C: WQF-laoshi. LYN: I’m honestly a little afraid.

C: Then, Zhang Jie-laoshi’s. LYN: All of his songs pretty such send me to the grave. His high notes are really so high. High notes are not my main thing. My main thing is the /starts singing the more rock-genre ‘爷们要战斗 (Men Fight)’/ Me and high notes go in opposite directions. LYN: 最美的太阳 (Most Beautiful Sun). Let me try it. // There’s no track for it. In this case... his copyrights are tight. C: 天下 (The World) LYN: Didn’t I sing that last time and my voice cracked? I can’t do it all. Remember, it went to my head? Someone had requested it the last time and, not knowing my limits, I tried. It got me worked up. I’ll try it. I’ll sing you a part of it. When it gets too much, I’ll stop. -- 天下 (The World) /stops right before the chorus/ C: Keep going! LYN: Uh.. it seems like you’re cheering me on. I just felt a sliver of support, then. LYN: Friends, there’s a saying that goes “见好就收” (quit while you’re ahead). People can’t be too greedy. If you continue... C: Lower it an octave. LYN: /laughs/ - /picks it up at the chorus; he did it!/ LYN: It goes straight to my head. I got worked up again. C: It’s okay. You can do it. LYN: Honestly, I CAN sing this song now. I just didn’t do it well, because I wanted to show you a comedy. Someone just cheered me on, again. Let me see if I can push through and get this song finished. - /finishes it up/ LYN: I did my best.

LYN: Men- we always try to look tough. But we all know who’s really suffering, don’t we?

C: Sing it through from the start. LYN: I really can’t stand when people cheer me on. If you’re going to be like that, then I’m going to stop streaming. I’m going to sleep. Stop provoking me.

C: Can you see the comments clearly? LYN: I can. Do you think I’ve sung so much that I’m lacking oxygen and can’t see clearly? No, I’m fine.

C: Ning-ge, 左手指月 (Upwards to The Moon). LYN: HAHAHAHAHA. Upwards to the Moon? Um.. .why don’t I just take my head off and give it to you? You’re asking for my life here, aren’t you? I’ll just give it to you. Is that not enough?? My head is yours. Upwards to the Moon... C: Ning-ge, let’s do an octave lower. LYN: You saw right through me. -- 左手指月 (Upwards to The Moon) LYN: Friends, here’s an interesting thing. I can’t even sing it with it lowered an octave. I can’t even sing it on a lower octave. Think about the concept of that. Let me try again. If nothing else, I’ll go all out. - /tries again/ LYN: This song hurts. Singing this song makes me feel like I hurt a lot. It’s not a physical pain, but a mental pain. Ahhh~~! Just these few words- you feel an inexplicable pain. LYN: Very painful. Excruciating pain. LYN: Alright, it;s not worth it. Let’s forget it. C: Bro, forget it. LYN: Are you calling me out?! LYN: I really don’t need to do this to myself. It’s enough already.

C: Ning-ge, you still have to record for your album tomorrow. LYN: Tomorrow... I’m not recording for my album. I have other work, tomorrow.

C: A Mayday song. LYN: Let me see if there’s a track. -- 夜訪吸血鬼 (Interview with the Vampire) LYN: This accompaniment is too noisy. :| But I really like this song. - /thinks of a different song/ -- 你不是真正的快樂 (You Are Not Truly Happy) LYN: I don’t really know it. So... I’ll stop singing it. C: Watching you sing this makes me really happy. LYN: I am very happy, but You Are Not Truly Happy.

LYN: I see you spamming “十年人间” (Shi Nian Ren Jian/DMBJ), but I really don’t know how to sing that song. I’ve heard it, but I don’t know how to sing it. Maybe if there’s a chance the next time I’ll sing it, then.

C: 黑夜一束光 (Praying) LYN: I won’t sing it now because I’ll have a performance in a few days that I’ll be singing it at. In order to leave you with some sense of “freshness”, I’ll save it for my performance. LYN: I’ve gone through all my songs and none of them really have that bright/positive feeling. I’ve mostly sung OSTs, so the majority are emotional songs. Those songs aren’t suitable to sing for particular occasions. I wouldn’t sing “你說愛情啊 (You Say Love)” at a school. Would I be encouraging them to start dating?? That’s not very uplifting. I’ll go to a school and sing 余生只想握紧你的手 (I Want to Hold Your Hand for the Rest of My Life)?? LYN: 意气趁年少 (Be Earnest While You’re Young) will work. It’s more positive, because it centers around learning. There’s a youthful feel, too. -- 意气趁年少 (Be Earnest While You’re Young)

C: Sing 初升 (Rising). LYN: I really haven’t sung this one before. Let me see if there’s a track. // There isn’t. /searches again/ There is. I’ve never sung it live before. Let me give it a try. If I crack then it does not represent my real ability- because this is my own song. -- 初升 (Rising) [Gen Z OST] C: You’ve crushed the original singer. LYN: Em, that’s overpraise. I AM the original singer. This is the theme song for the drama Gen Z. It’s a character song, and my first time singing it live.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: 云字诀 (Yun Zi Jue). LYN: I might not be able to sing it in my current condition. /searches for the track/ I can sing you MXT’s version? Oh, it’s the same version. Then, I’ll sing it. -- 云字诀 (Yun Zi Jue) [The Ingenious One OST] - /messes it up. starts over with the excuse he didn’t turn on the special sound effects/ LYN: Later I need to find someone to get these pictures on Kugou Music changed. What IS THIS??

LYN: I’ve already done Thermage treatment and don’t look like this anymore. ^

LYN: Change this picture out. What the heck. Look at these beady and small eyes and eyeliner. I can’t stand it. ^

LYN: This one’s okay. It looks like this fellow is emo. He’s a little depressed. Look at his eyes, full of gloom. His face is chubby, too. ^

LYN: Look at this. This is worse. Look at how big this face is. Oh, my goodness. He looks so bloated. Is your name “Liu Fu Zhong”?? Look at this face. ^

LYN: This one is okay. This one is good. He’s got a good jawline. This one doesn’t look as bad. It’s good. ^

LYN: This is from my concert three years ago. I’m waiting for the audience, looking worried that I won’t have many fans in attendance. ^

 LYN: This one was taken in the early days, when I was in a better condition. We took a whole set of “business” photos. ^

LYN: Look at this one. This one doesn’t want to live anymore. Pretending to be depressed, using his hand to hold up his head. In reality, the head is empty. Look at this guy- head empty. ^

LYN: This one is okay. It’s more recent. I look a little more lively, at least. You can see just a little bit of handsomeness on this face.  ^

LYN: This is also more recent. But at that time I was a little chubby. Look at this big face. It’s even this big AFTER the picture was shopped. Think about what it would look like if it weren’t?? ^

LYN: THIS you can say was when I was at my peak visuals. I took this photo as part of a set for a magazine; there was also a video. This was probably the peak of my visuals. I took these when The Long Ballad was airing. ^

LYN: This is okay. Also more recent. Golden-haired. The Disney look. It was pretty lively. ^ 

LYN: There’s no problem with this one. I think it’s okay. This was a while ago. You can see- his eyes are different. There’s something there. ^

LYN: This one’s a fool. /laughs/ Look at this fool. Look at these eyes. They sure are open wide. Open but soulless. This guy doesn’t have a clue what’s going on. ^

LYN: This is- kind/a little foolish with a side of wandering. He looks youthful, with hopes for the future. ^

LYN: This one is.. more mature. This was taken for the Jiangsu New Year’s event. You can say I was a mature artist by then. I do have eyeliner here, but not as “deadening”. ^

LYN: This one is.. pretending to be young. This should have been for the New Year.. otherwise I wouldn’t be wearing red. But I did look more refined. ^

LYN: This one... has some after-editing. Why do these just keep scrolling? This one is quite nice, though. Curly hair. Hong Kong-style. (?) ^

LYN: This one... he has a stick! Pretending to be Sun Wukong, or what?? At this point, he already has the eyes of an actor. They’re not like the one before, with nothing in them. ^

LYN: This is... over-edited. It’s.. too much. ^

LYN: This one was not too long ago! I look a little... chubbier, here. Look at this baozi-face. ^ LYN: Oh, we came back around. This is the worst one (the first one). LYN: Alright. LYN: /sigh/ LYN: Let’s sing a song. It’s called 云字诀 (Yun Zi Jue). -- 云字诀 (Yun Zi Jue) [The Ingenious One OST] [The Ingenious One OST] LYN: Thanks, everyone. This song is quite nice. I pretty much liked it after my first listen.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: I want to hear a Cantonese song. LYN: Don’t rush. Ehm... hold on a minute. Let me go grab something more to drink. I’ll sing for you after I come back. I’m running out of videos to show you, though. Because honestly this stream is running a bit long. I don’t have enough. You can watch it again. Wait for me while I get some water.  -- break #3.5 LYN: I’m back. Hold on, hold on. Let me find a song... (Stay with Me)

C: Where’s Daimi? LYN: She’s sleeping, don’t disturb her. She doesn’t have any schedule today. Let’s not disturb her. Let her sleep. Later, when she wakes up, I’ll call her over.

C: Did you see the ZY wrap trailer? LYN: What are you talking about? Of course I saw it. I acted in it, would I not go watch it? I’ve seen all the trailers for things I’ve acted in. It’s nice. I think in a few days there’ll be... no, never mind. I was just going to say there would be more content out in a short while. It’s a drama we spent several months working on, so I hope you can take a look when it comes out. LYN: Of course, YNGS as well- you have to watch. - /recites his lines from the trailer/ LYN: I remember it, because I only have so many. C: I support Ning Yuanzhou being abducted by aliens in the end. LYN: Have to taken a peek at the script? I admit it- at the end NYZ is taken away by aliens. The ending is a big suspense. He’s fighting with someone and in the very end, when it looks like he is about to win, a flash of light crosses the sky. A UFO appears and takes NYZ away. Why does it end like this? In preparation for a second season. The first part is called “Yi Nian Guan Shan”; the second part is called “Yi Nian Kai He”. Close (Guan) to Open (Kai). Mountain (Shan) to River (He). In the second season called YNKH- the UFO comes back in the first episode. NYZ has amnesia.  C: “Er Nian Guan Shan” is easier to remember. C: “Yi Nian Guan Si”. LYN: What is that?? If the first part is called “Yi Nian Guan Shan”, then the second should be “Er Nian Guan Shan.” The third part is “San Nian Guan Shan”. If we make it all the way to season 11, would it be called “Shi Yi Nian Guan Shan”? LYN: We should call it “Yi Nian Guan Qi” (Guan Qi, the character from SYXSSYX, who was “abducted by aliens”). C: Negotiating more scenes for yourself in a second season? LYN: No- our screenwriter is Zhang Wei-laoshi. She likes to use people’s names, and she has her own “Zhang Wei Universe.” I don’t mean any disrespect. It’s just that a lot of her male characters across stories have a connection to each other. The detailed people will have found out. If you watch her dramas you’ll find that some names appear across the universes. For example our drama will mention the name of a character in a different one of her dramas. What was the name of the male lead in A Dream of Splendor? I think it was Gu Qianfan, right? In this drama, my name is Yuanzhou. Qianfan and Yuanzhou- don’t you think there has to be some relation there? [t/n: part of a common saying] LYN: We’re all part of Zhang Wei-laoshi’s written universe. It’s possible that when she writes a script in the future, there will be a character called Ning Yuanzhou in it. The other day she posted something to her friend circle- I think it might have been at the wrap party and she complimented me! I forgot exactly what she said, at the time I had a bit to drink. But I promised her that if he character Ning Yuanzhou ever showed up in another one of her works, I wouldn’t just let it be a name on a page- I would come to act for her. I would cameo for her, as long as she continues to write and write about NYZ. - /fan makes a side comment asking about how much he drank.how many dishes he has to eat/ LYN: So, friends. Don’t think that I am being unfair only to you. Because I don’t exclusively makes “pies” for you, either. I have nothing against you, that I make “empty promises”. Don’t assume that just because ZW-laoshi is a very amazing screenwriter that I won’t make “pies” for her, too. No- all are treated equal. // After this story, do you feel more at ease? I’m not only like this to you. I make pies for other laoshis to eat, too. XD LYN: But if she ever comes to look for me, I really do have to go. How could I not?? But... I’ll probably have something else going on when that time comes. I might have something else to do... but it’s not for sure! If she asks me, I have to make the time. I have to make good on my promise.

C: You drank four cans already. LYN: It’s not four. I probably have more... Oh. It is four! You got me. Four, and a can of coffee.  LYN: Why are you keeping track of how many cans I’m drinking?? Are you going to take these to recycle? Should I mail them to you? C: You’ll get water swollen. LYN: What are you talking about? It’s a food thing to drink plenty of water. I don’t care about being bloated; I’m not going to be on camera tomorrow anyway. It’s fine. C: Give me the cans. I’ll sell them for money. LYN: Okay. Pay the postage yourself. I’ll send you these four cans, but pay the postage. C: The sugar content is high. LYN: No- this is just carbonated water. There’s no sugar/flavor. It’s just water.

C: The rising star of 2023- is that you? LYN: What an interesting question. I don’t get what you mean. From your language, I hear a story. That is, one day, you were surfing the internet when you inexplicably came across a fortune telling stream. The host posted an article that read, “In 2023, in this industry, there will be a rising star. A superstar will appear in the year of 2023.” They might have seen something like that, Am I right? Isn’t this story very complete? I extrapolated it out of just a few words. They probably saw someone post something like that. And then, in that moment, they thought that this prediction was describing me. They saw me streaming and they thought that they could see a purple aura from me. LYN: Look, I have lights here. So this friend thought, “Is it you?” Here’s the thing- I hope it is. If you ask me, of course I would hope its about me. Everyone wants to climb to the peak, right? But I’m guessing this “rising star” isn’t me. There are all sorts of highly skilled people are are just on the verge of popularity- why don’t you go ask them? It’s probably not me. You can go and ask them. I’m not- go ask someone else. LYN: I want to keep both feet on the ground, because I’m tall. If I climb too fast it might be too unstable. I’ll keep both feet on the floor- take it one step at a time to try one thing after another. I want to accumulate my viewers and their interests, and accumulate my own experience. That’s my path. Let’s not mess with any “rising stars.” LYN: Many stars pass in the blink of an eye. They’re shooting stars. So.. I don’t want to be a star. I’ll be... a little white rabbit. LYN: Now I want to gift you with a nice song. -- 感覺自己是巨星 (Think I’m a Superstar) [Mao Buyi] LYN: /to the tune of the song/ ~ Superstar, superstar we love you. Quickly, listen to us give you “rainbow farts” (excessive compliments). In our eyes, you’re the youngest. ~ LYN: So, friends. I would like to bear witness to exactly who this “rising star” is together with you. Who will it be? Let’s anticipate it! I’m also very curious! Let’s find out who it will be.

- - - - - - - - - -

- /Daimi barking/ LYN: Why are you being so mean? What do you have to be angry about? LYN: She’s awake. - /gives her the mic/ LYN: Weren’t you barking earlier? Come on, say something. Sing.

C: The rising star is Daimi. LYN: Are you talking about her? Let’s hope so. LYN: Once I said “rising star” she got angry- I mean- she woke up. I hope my female artist can be popular. 

- /Daimi, licking his arm/ LYN: Enough of that! She keeps licking me. -/Daimi tries to lick him again/ LYN: ! Do you want me to stop streaming? You’re trying to get me to stop, is that it? Okay, I understand. Sorry, friends. I need to stop streaming now because Daimi was pushing my hand away. She doesn’t want me to stream anymore. She doesn’t want me to stream- she’s about to eat my mouse. - /Daimi tries to lick his hand again/ LYN: Tsk. That’s enough...  - /makes her wave/

- /dancing/ - /promptly puts her on the floor/ LYN: /to Daimi/ Go play, go play. Don’t bother me. It’s time to work.

- - - - - - - - - -

C: Ning-ge, could you wish me well on my exam? LYN: Of course I can. I hope that tomorrow, or all of this week- everyone who is preparing to take the NCEE is in good spirits and can have a good result. Let’s amaze the world with one brilliant feat and reach for the stars. - /had said the proverb wrong, initially/ LYN: Excuse me. See- this is what an uncultured person will do. They’ll say the wrong thing. People who haven’t taken the NCEE will mis-read the phrasing. - /makes up for it by saying a bunch more (correctly)/

C: Ning-ge, could you bless me with passing the 16th level (?)? LYN: Am I a tortoise? Is my stream a wishing well? And I am the tortoise in that pond? You’ve come to me with your wishes? Then, why aren’t you throwing me any money? You should at least leave an offering, before making a wish. This is just... forceful wishing. What you’re doing is taking game money to throw into the pond, to trick me. LYN: I’m sure you’ll pass. Do well on the test! LYN: In order to become the “Rising Star of 2023″ like mentioned earlier, from now on I will change my name. I’ll be Liu Ziwei. Don’t call me Liu Yuning anymore. From now on I will be known as Liu Ziwei.

LYN: Friends, how many of you are watching my stream for the first time? How may of you are first-timers? If this is your first time watching or if you don’t watch often, you can subscribe to my weibo. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. Here’s the thing with my streams- most of the time I’m speaking nonsense. Don’t take anything to heart and don’t fall for any tricks. If you take this too seriously then it becomes meaningless. That just proves that you are too innocent. Only believe about 20% of what I say here. Most of the time I will use an amusing or joking delivery to communicate with my fans and make the people who maybe don’t necessarily hate me stay a while. Just listen to my stream for entertainment. Don’t fall for what I say. Okay? I’m not capable of teaching you any lessons or opinions. Just listen for entertainment. C: Before you told us to believe 30% of what you said. How did it dwindle to only 20%? LYN: /sigh/ It used to be that I wasn’t very strict with what I said, so it ended up that people had a lot to hold against me. I was ridiculed for my words. Though it might not have been my intention, I was honestly too careless with what I said. So now my game plan is to say more nonsense and avoid more... sensitive topics. It���s fine as long as you are okay and I am okay, and everyone is happy. 

C: Will you sing a Cantonese song? LYN: I don’t know very many. Let me sing this for you. -- 无赖 (Rascal) [Ronald Cheng] LYN: Listen for entertainment. I’m a North-easterner, after all. My Cantonese is very poor. I know that. So.. it’s for fun. Someone earlier said “You’re Cantonese is skewing!” I don’t know what they meant by that, but probably that my pronunciation was off. It’s alright. 

LYN: Let me think... what other Cantonese songs do I know? What else do I know...? C: Once you start speaking the Dongbei dialect comes out. LYN: What else did you expect?

C: I’m a Cantonese person. I can say, it sounded very nice! LYN: You really are clever at speaking. “I’m a Cantonese person, I can say it sounded very nice... but it wasn’t accurate.”

C: First Love. LYN: Oh~ -- 初恋 (First Love)

C: I’m going to throw up. (bc of the video and swaying) LYN: Your age...? Forget about you- I’M a little nauseous. LYN: Is my stream over-trying to be cool? It’s slightly over. LYN: This is too eye-searing, yeah? Okay. Let’s stick with this effect for the... “middle-aged”.

LYN: I thought of a song just now. I REALLY really like it. -- 一生所爱 (Lifelong Love)  LYN: If there’s a chance later I’ll sing it properly for you. I don’t really have much strength left, today.

- /Daimi barks/ LYN: :| What are you barking at?

-- 倩女幽魂 (A Chinese Ghost Story)

LYN: That’s about it. It’s about time, friends. Thank you for keeping me company and for your support. I told you I would stream until you threw up. In terms of length, today’s stream didn’t let you down, did it? I accidentally saw a little earlier, how long I’ve streamed for. Right now it’s... four hours and thirty-five minutes. C: Don’t go! Don’t! LYN: I’ve been streaming for four and a half hours. That’s not a small amount. If i keep streaming /I’M/ going to throw up. You’re over there lying on your bed and snacking on melon seeds, but I’ve been over here yelling and singing, moving my mouth for four and a half hours! Now you’re telling me you don’t want me to go?? I’m going to throw up! I’m not streaming until you throw up, I’m streaming until /I/ feel like throwing up, now. Do you think you’re the only one who sees that violently shaking video and gets dizzy? I get dizzy too! I’m older in age- you all know that. C: You still turn it on, even though it makes you dizzy? LYN: I just wanted to give you the best experience in such a simple stream, didn’t I?? I didn’t want you to feel like I was just sitting in a room. I wanted to give you some stage effects, so that you can immerse yourself. I do this all so you can feel included- even this laugh sound. It’s all so you can immerse yourself in this room and the mood. Even though I’ve made myself nauseous- I still have to power through and stream for you. It’s all for the immersive experience, is that not enough??

LYN: It’s about time. If you still haven’t subscribed to my weibo, please do so. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. I thank you all for keeping me company and for watching my stream. Even if you’ve only been watching for thirty minutes or if you’ve been here from the start. I thank you. I hope to see you in the next one, alright? I hope you had a relaxing, wonderful, and happy night. It was great to have you and I hope you had fun. See you next time! Goodnight, everyone!

#Liu Yuning #lyn livestream #(4:40:00) #album/concert chat #entertainment industry observation #new hobby? #dogs chat #laughing in the face of antis #osts and pricing #playing with filters #some singing #including zs's 光亮 #! #左手指月 (Upwards to the Moon) #HAHAH #lyn's biggest anti is himself #daimi time #[i forgot how to Chinese???] #[it's been a long two weeks friends]

[icameheretoreadstuff]

Butterflies

Pairing: Sam Winchester x F!Reader

Warning: angst, fluff, drinking alcohol

Summary: You've been hunting for years with Sam and Dean. You caught the monster, but you almost died, And sam is pissed.

A/N: masterpost & links are pinned on my tumblr.

You came into the bunker sighing and sat down, Sam stopped and looked at you "How could you be so careless y/n?" he spat "Don't you know how much you mean to us?" he continued. Dean walked over to you guys with beer "Hey! Everyone is alive!" he said giving you guys each beer, you accepted the beer. "Y/n apologized tons of times, but the most importaint thing is that the monster is dead and without y/n input It might have gone the other way" He said to Sam, "She is a hunter Sam, she knows what she's getting her self into" he took a deep breath "she's okay!" Dean reasured him.

"the bitch is dead!" he joked while he cheered. But Sam did not seem to laugh. "Sam-" you trailed off, wanting to apologize again. Dean stood there still trying to hand him an beer. You looked up at sam and saw how pissed off he was. He shrugged it off and said "no thanks, I think I'll just go to bed" He spat, and began walking away from you. Dean tried to stop him, "Sam!" you saw him walking over to his brother. you could see them talking but had no Idea what they were talking about.

You just froze, thinking about the monster who almost killed you. You didnt quite understand the situation with Sam, since you've been hunting for a long time with Sam and Dean. You could'nt understand why this time was so different, Why was Sam so pissed? You felt so bad, but couln't help but wonder if there was something you didn't know. You were scared cause you were madly in love with Sam. The look on his face went on rewind in your head, you felt like you were not welcome anymore. Maybe it was your time to leave.

You just wanted to go over to him and just hold him and make him smile again, but maybe he'll never see you that way. Dean gave his brother an reasuring look on his face said something to him, Sam just nodded annoyingly and then he replied "please just let me deal with this by myself! I just want to sleep." he said to dean. "Ok" Dean answered and backed off. "I'll se you tomorrow" he said to me and Dean and walked away.

Dean walked over to you and sat down, "Don't worry about him, He'll be fine" he began and took a sip of his beer. You just sat there feeling like crap "I didnt mean-" you began, Dean caught you off, "hey, y/n" he gave you a smile, trying to cheer you up. "Don't worry about it." After drinking up your beer, Dean had tried to cheer you up but you couldn't shake Sam out of your head. So you thanked for your beer and went to bed.

The morning after you woke up, You wanted to stay in bed and just hide from everyone and not face the world, but you got out of bed either way. When you were finished dressing up you stood infront of the door. You took a deep breath and counted to three before opening the door.

You walked down hall finding the kitchen. Sam sat there, you told yourself to just go in and face the music. You walked over to the coffee station "hey" you said grabbing a cup of coffee. "hey" he answered. "Where is dean?" you asked as you sat down sipping your coffee, trying to break the Ice buy small talk. "I don't know" he anwsered "oh" you responded.

He sighed out and layed down the laptop screen and looked at me, "y/n-" he began, laying his hand over yours, giving me a look. You couldnt read what Sam's look was all about, but before he could say anything else, Dean caught him off "Sam! Is y/n leaving or staying?" Dean had his nose up in his phone, "I really hope-" he trailed off and looked up from his phone, noticing you sat right there. "Dean!" Sam spat. You pulled your hand away from Sam. "Sorry for the intrusion, Just letting you guys know I'm going on a beer run" Dean turned and walked away.

You just sat there, didn't know what to think. "I think I have to go" you stated and raised up, "why?" Sam asked and raised up after you, You walked towards the door " Wait! y/n!" he began. "obviously It's time I moved on" you began, feeling the butterflies inside your tummy going nuts. All your feelings for him surfaced and you had no control over holding them back anymore. "You dont like me the same way I like you, So I should pack my stuff" you blurted out, continuing to walk out the door.

Feeling so dumb for even saying that, you stopped and put your hands over your face, feeling like you've made the situation worse. "sorry I shouldn't have said that" Your tears started to build up inside you. "y/n!" he sighed. "I think it's just best that I go, I think I've overstayed my welcome" you answered, tears slowly running down your face. you continued to walk twoards the door, but Sam stopped you by grabbing your shoulder. "It's not like that at all!" he answered. "please let me explain" he begged, you turned your head around looking at him. "Dean was just talking about some new case.”

He walked over to you drying away your tears. "Im sorry for the way I acted yesterday, I was just scared of losing you" he said, "oh okay" you nodded, You started to wave away the situation, covering up your tears "im so sorry for what I said earlier" you began "you know, about me liking you and stuff, let's just pretend that, that never happened" you sighed "I don't want to put you in a difficult situation, I don't want to lose you either" you tried to cover your face and turned your face away from him. But he walked around you, grabbing an tissue and drying away your tears. "It's okay, I didnt mean it" you reasured him, But you could see his face looking teared up as well, which made the situation not easier. "y/n-" he began.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to do this." he said, cupping your face and crashed his lips into yours. The kiss was intense, passionate and felt so right. Before he could catch a breath he said "I love you y/n, and I got mad yesterday becuse I was afraid of losing you, I've been holding it a secret for so long I just-" He said, while cupping your face. "you love me?" you interupted him with a smile, He began drying away your tears. He nodded "yes, please dont go" he said looking deeply into my eyes, "I love you too" you said back and gave each other a big hug. You dried away his tears. He smiled and cupped your face and kissed you passionately.

"Im so sorry for-" you sighed "all my feelings everywhere" you chuckled, feeling so embaressed. "Don't apologize, I love your feelings" he replied with a chuckle and gave you a hug.

#sam winchester x reader #sam winchester x you #sam x you #sam x reader #sam winchester x y/n #supernatural fic #supernatural #sam winchester #spn imagine

[kaitaiga]

OC Interview

G'day! I felt like doing some writing tonight and I remembered I saw this OC Interview thing going around, so I thought I'd give it a crack! I did something like this a while back but in an ask game. I had so much fun with it so why not do it again!

It's pretty long and is written from your pov (the interviewer!). I hope you enjoy and I'd 100% recommend you give it a go yourself with ur own ocs!

August 2022

You trailed behind a tall man with a thick moustache and cap, trying your best to keep up with his quick pace and long strides.

“You, wouldn’t think he would mind, right?”

“Hm?” He glances over his shoulder at you. “What? Nah. You’d actually probably make his day more than anything. Bit of time off trainin’ would make any bloke ‘ere happy.”

You were visiting the main barracks of the 2nd Commando Regiment in hopes of interviewing a special forces operator about his life outside the military for your class assignment. A brother of a friend of yours just so happened to be an acquaintance to one, and he agreed to meet you.

The man, who introduced himself as Lachlan, lead you over to a quiet corner overlooking a large grassy field with soldiers running about, fitted with a small round table and two chairs. He gestures his head for you to take a seat.

“Right. I’ll be back for ya with Damo in a moment. Don’t go runnin’ off now, will ya?” He says firmly.

“O-okay.” Not like you were, anyways.

Ten minutes go by…

Sigh. He is taking an awfully long time. You skim over the questions you had prepared on your laptop once more, making sure everything was in order. You didn’t want to take up more of the valuable training time of that soldier. When suddenly…

“G’day,” startles you and you swivel around in the chair, looking up at the tall, blond man as he places a hand on your shoulder to ground you. “Haha! Sorry darl’ didn’t mean to scare ya” he says with a warm smile.

He moves past to sit in the chair across the table from you and as he does so, you could smell the overwhelming scent of men’s body spray, deducing that he just applied some before coming to see you out of consideration.

“You must be Damien, right?”

“Yep, that’s me, love.”

“Alright! Are you ready to answer a few questions?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

Basics

Name:

“Damien Whitlock. You can just call me Damo though, that’s what most blokes refer to me as. Sergeant in the Second Commando Regiment.”

Are you single?

“Woah! Crackin’ onto me ‘ere, are we love? We just met! *laughs* Buy me a drink first, would ya? Haha. Nah yeah, I’m single alright.”

Birthplace?

“Was born in Sydney, though was raised on a farm in the countryside for most of me life. Only really came up to Sydney to go to boardin’ school.”

Hair colour?

He reaches up and tugs on a chunk of his hair. “What colour does this look like to ya?” he snorts. “Red? You callin’ me a ranga? Don’t insult me. Blond.”

Eye colour?

He hums and leans forward so you can get a better look into his eyes over your laptop screen. “Blue. Blue, Gray. Something of the sorts, I reckon.”

a/n: puppy eyes…

Birthday?

“7th March. 26 right now…gettin’ bit old now, aren’t I?”

Gender?

“Male, last time I checked.”

Mood?

He shrugs, “Eh. Livin’ the dream, honestly. Not much to whinge about right now, and not much to be over the moon about either.”

Are you happy?

“Pleasantly. It’s because I’m not havin’ to do what those fellas down there are doing right now” he says whilst peering out of the window besides you.

Are you angry?

“Nah. Cool as a cucumber.”

Summer/Winter?

“How ‘bout neither. I’m an autumn man. Not too hot and not too cold to get shit done. If I had to choose though, winter. Nice to rug up in layers of clothes or walk anywhere without bustin’ a sweat.”

Morning/Afternoon?

“Mornin’. The air feels nice and it’s quiet. Just the way I like it, believe it or not.”

Eight Things About Your Love Life

Are you in love?

“Can confirm that I am indeed, not in love.” He nods. “Maybe with my ute though.”

Who ended your last relationship?

“Uhm,” he clears his throat and looks away at the floor, “Reckon it was me? Given I did in fact catch her with another bloke, in me own bed may I add, and kicked her out. You could also argue that she ended it when she started havin’ it with him. I dunno, really.”

Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

“Probably.” He shrugs, “Look, like I’ve turned down people for sure, but they were mostly some randos you’d find at the pub. Not someone I’ve known for a while.”

Are you afraid of commitments?

“Uh, probs not. They sure as hell scared of me though, that’s for sure. Not one relationship I’ve had where I’ve caught the misses doing dodgy shit behind me back. Can guarantee ya that I’m a very loyal person, even when I’m away. Marriage? Not gonna beat around the bush ‘ere, I do wanna get married it’s just…*sigh* never mind...”

Have you hugged someone within the last week?

“Nope. Would be nice, though.” You look up and notice he’s staring intently at you.

Have you ever had a secret admirer?

“Yeah, this one chick over in the US. My mate told me ‘bout ‘er. I reckon I only had about one convo with this chick and all of a sudden, she starts anon sendin’ me things and placing things near my gear. Though it was nice until I found out she was literally tryna do a ritual on me or somethin’. Crazy stuff.”

Six Choices

Love or Lust?

“Love.”

Iced Tea or Lemonade?

“I would absolutely kill for a Lipton right ‘bout now. Iced tea.”

Cats or Dogs?

“Doooogs all the way! Love ‘em to bits. Cats are just lil pieces of shit that try to scratch me whenever they can. Also, I’ve been told I look like a dog, can you confirm- “

A few best friends or many regular friends?

“Couple close friends will do. As long as they’ve got my back and I’ve got theirs, that’s all I need.”

Wild night out or romantic night in?

“Night in, thanks. Piggin’ out on food with my misses and watchin’ a movie sounds fucking mint to me.”

Day or Night?

“Love the night. So peaceful and beautiful when you walk around the city, lookin’ at all the lights or when you can see the stars clearly in the country.”

Four Have You Evers

Been caught sneaking out?

He laughs. “Yeah, this one time back in school, Daniel and I snuck out of our dorms to go grab some grub. We were raaaavishing! The food they served us in that school was criminal. They caught us jumpin’ the fence ‘round back.”

Fell up/down the stairs?

“Yeah. Ate shit tryna run up ten floors of stairs during PT. Never seen ol’ Lachy boy laugh so hard, so I guess it’s a win?”

Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt?

“…Physically? Yeah, probably joining commandos. Christ, I couldn’t even tell you how much pain and suffering I went through in training and the selection course. Worthwhile though, look at me now.”

Wanted to disappear?

“Yeah…For sure. Losing Daniel was hard, but what came after, the grievin’ and the possibility that he could’ve been saved…*sigh*...I’ll stop there for now.” His voice subtly cracked, and you noted seeing his eyes water before he turned away.

Four Preferences

Smile or Eyes?

He pauses to think, staring at the table. You notice a pink tinge appear across his cheeks. “That’s hard…can I pick both? I can get lost in some beautiful, big eyes…the way they look at ya…” He notices himself getting carried away and clears his throat, “B-but a nice smile always makes me heart melt also…”

Shorter or Taller?

“Shorter. Love to just pick ‘em up for the shits ‘n giggles, throw ‘em over my shoulder. Also, great arm and head rests.”

Intelligence or Attraction?

“Intelligence. Love me a smart woman, like yeah tell me about the thermodynamics of a kettle. Draw me the free-body diagram while you’re at it, too... Don’t ask how I know all this.”

Hook-up or Relationship?

“Relationship for sure. Lookin’ for my misses. Not sure if I’ll ever get one the way things are going but oh well.” He shrugs, “Not gonna sit here and pretend that I haven’t had my own fair share of hook-ups, though.”

Family

Do you and your family get along?

“I get on well with my sisters. They’re probably the ones I keep most in touch with, the rascals. Parents I do keep in touch with but…even less than before. They’re still not happy about me enlistin’. Brother fucked off years ago without a trace.”

Would you say you have a ‘messed up’ life?

“Nah. Well, before joinin’ the army at least. No real issues growin’ up but after enlistin’…Let’s just say I’ve seen and done some shit that only so little have the balls to do.”

Have you ever run away from home?

“Nah. Where would I run off to anyways in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere?”

Have you ever gotten kicked out?

“Again, no. I’d like to think of myself as a good boy.”

Friends

Do you secretly hate one of your friends?

“If I did, I wouldn’t be friends with any of ‘em now, would I?”

Have you considered all your friends’ good friends?

“For the most part yes. To be fair, we’re all in the military so we’re all a little fucked in the head, honestly. We’re just here to do our bit and clean up a mess.”

Who is your best friend?

“Ah…” His smile fades, “Daniel. Danny, Dano. Doesn’t matter. He’s…long gone now…went to school together and enlisted together. He passed a while ago, tryin’ to save me. Smart fella he was.”

Who knows everything about you?

“Again, that would be Daniel. We grew up together so, he’s seen all the embarrassing stuff. I don’t think anyone else knows me on the level that he did, could be Lachlan but even I’m hidin’ stuff from him.”

--

“Well, that’s all of the questions I have for now, Damien! Thanks for letting me interview you!”

“Ah, no worries. Thanks for takin’ me outta PT.”

#cheeky bugga #anyways this took ages but it was fun! #getting into your oc's mind is very entertaining #it also helps me make out their personality more #bc damien for me can be a bit all over the place #damien whitlock #cod oc #my oc #call of duty oc #oc interview #australian oc #mwii #original character #call of duty modern warfare oc #modern warfare oc

[winderlylandchime]

(Lets all say a silent thank you to my cousin who suggested that I record him at major moments last week) 2/3And Brian said there’s nothing noble about being poor. (And my brother lost his mind. Im glad you gave me a heads up that you guys were wondering about this scene so i could film him) ‘Wait!!!!! hold up!!! Pause it! I’ve had thoughts about brian and money and *waves his hands while fast walking* stuff but I need my laptop! (he has over 20 google tabs opened with research about colleges in Pittsburgh that could do marketing degrees, how much it would cost and shit like that. One tab was also ‘how to learn to play violin in less than a week’ he said he wanted to see if its really that hard) Okay so! I’ve been thinking A LOT about this. So Mike said they were in the same school, remember? But Mike dropped out or something like that from college which to be fair, so did I and I think I’m doing fantastic, haters that go by the name mom and dad may disagree but I’m here for a fun time not to cure cancer, anyway back to Brian. Brian has this big fancy wearing suit type of job and he’s a partner remember? So that unfortunately demands a resume with big words on it like “college”. So Brian definitely went to college and he obviously worked his ass off since clearly him and Mike are nowhere near each other cash wise. I mean a loft like that? That he probably owns? At 30? Plus the suit wearing job? Yeah, he did a lot of work and probably even had straight As. Probably even in high school so he could get into college AND like how he keeps going at Justin for school? Remember him being impressed by his SATs and how he would make him study like crazy. Shit I wouldn’t be surprised if he even quizzed him during sex. Poor Justin for sure got a boner while taking a test. Wait im getting distracted! Anyway his *gags* dad also took money for him AND HE HAD IT FUCKING READY! He went to see him and he already had it ready! And just before his nephew said Brians sister says he doesnt give them any money which clearly not true to some level but clearly they saw him make money and they took it. And we both know that house was on fire! It was burning every day! This dude made it out alive but he most definitely got 3rd degree burns. So he for sure knew the only way out was to turn 18 and get into college far away and then never come back unless it’s for a funeral to make 100% sure that they are in in that box. So him saying there’s nothing noble about being poor is coming from a different place than what Justin is dealing with with that fucker. That dude is just a broke college student who got offered a deal that kinda sucks BUT he said it himself to Jen, his parents payed for shit, they supported him. Meanwhile Brian? Every single thing he has down to his drugs was bought by him. And i doubt he’d ever take anything from anyone because you know how shitty abusive parents are? They buy you a box of cereal once and then throw it in your face for 3 years straight. So he probably never got anything from his parents and if he did it came with a price *looks at paused Brian on tv and takes a deep breath* and probably some bruises too. So him saying and thinking that, is coming from a place of survival and “look what i did for myself” when everyone probably told him he’s never gonna be anything except maybe dead. And sure he clearly loves money and power since he’s even willing to work with that fucker but in some way can you blame him? He was powerless all his life. But if that would be Ethan who would say that? Now that’s different. It’s not exactly survival in the same sense *looks at me in worry* i fear, i lost the plot of the point..i will make it back but i need to think. *plays the episode again* ‘WHY WOULD THEY MAKE HIM JERK OFF TO RAGE?! No matter what he’s always gonna be obsessed with Brian. HE IS RUNNING WITH SPERM IN HIS CUP! RUN FORREST RUN. Is that really how this was done?’

WOW the character analysis from your brother… I personally think he’s spot on (I’ve given a lot of thought to Brian’s SES background and where he is financially and professionally at the start of the show… too much thought? Nah.) (Btw tell your brother some day that the fandom thinks Brian went to Carnegie Mellon - I love all his open tabs) And this is happening in parallel to Stockwell - Brian is clearly a take the money and who tf cares where it’s from because he had to be, he didn’t have any alternative. His advice makes perfect sense for him to have survived.

Cosign your brother’s analysis.

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

[bnnywngs]

the day wwx found out his father is a cheater

rating: T words: 1778

pairings: lan wangji/wei wuxian | wei changze/jiang fengmian

tags: established relationship, cheating, angst, good friend/sibling jiang cheng, slice of life (ish?)

cw // tw : cheating / caught cheating (not wangxian!!!)

(incomplete as of now, may or may not continue)

-

Today was a good day and Wei Wuxian was feeling pretty happy. He just got back from a very secret errand for himself - he bought an engagement ring all by himself for his lovely and perfect boyfriend of eight years! (he did send pictures to the group chat between him and his best friends, created just for this event, asking for help and if the ring was pretty enough for his Lan Zhan)

Wei Wuxian was ready to speak with his father about his plans and then to wait for his mother's text so they could talk too. But first, he needs to get there.

“You’re sure you’re ready to live far from your parents? You’re like, one of the most filial guys I know.” Jiang Cheng argued from the other side of the call, a rude tone with a hint of worry.

“Aww, A-Cheng!” Wei Wuxian cooed “You’re worried about me!” he laughed “But, yeah, I’m ready. I think. I’ve been spending more and more time at Lan Zhan’s apartment now, you know. Sleeping there every other week. And it’s not that far from here, I can still visit dad or have lunch with him.”

“You once told me you didn’t want to leave home because your dad would be alone.” Wei Wuxian is quite certain that Jiang Cheng was rolling his eyes.

The elevator’s door opened on his floor and he got out “Yeah, that’s why I have plans to buy an apartment nearby with Lan Zhan when we have enough money.” he shrugged.

“Ugh.” Jiang Cheng groaned, probably rolling his eyes again “Do you even know when you’ll get married? Like, in a month or in a year? Please say a year.”

Wei Wuxian gasped dramatically, pausing in front of his door “Why would I wait a whole year to marry the love of my life? Why don’t you say something like ‘do you even know if he’ll say yes?’ like anyone else?”

“Because I’m not dumb like you. Lan Wangji obviously love you, he fucking punched Wen Chao’s face for you back in highschool.” Jiang Cheng scoffed loudly “And he would be dumb if said no to you. Because I would hunt him down for making you sad. With Wen Ning. And maybe Wen Qing. And a-jie, too. Maybe I can convince the peacock to give us some money to hire… people.”

Wei Wuxian laughed, unlocking his door after too much time trying to find his keys “Aiyah, Jiang Cheng, I really love you so much. Platonically, of course.”

Jiang Cheng sighed loudly, as if trying to control himself “We’re brothers from other parents.”

Ah, Wei Wuxian really loves it when his best friend says that. He opened and closed the door rather quietly, chuckling a little and stepping inside and quickly taking off his shoes to walk to the living room, making a movement to take his backpack off his tired shoulders - his laptop is rather heavy.

Wei Wuxian started to say something to his friend, probably a joke or teasing. He doesn’t even remember what he was thinking at that moment because when he looked up and saw something never thought would happen to him.

His father was on the couch, but he wasn’t alone. Jiang Fengmian, Jiang Cheng’s father and his own father’s best friend from high school, was sitting on Wei Changze’s lap while they kissed deeply, shirt already open and Wei Wuxian could see love bites, those red patches were definitely love bites, on the other male’s neck.

Jiang Fengmian. Who Wei Wuxian saw as his second father, who divorced his wife a few years ago, when he and Jiang Cheng started university. Jiang Fengmian, who had an unhappy marriage with Yu Ziyuan and had two children with her, but happily joined his kids with his best friend’s only son so they could be friends too. Jiang Fengmian who often had ‘men only’ nights with Wei Changze, and loved to take Wei Wuxian out with his own kids and gave him more attention.

And Wei Changze, his father, who’s still married to his mother. His mother, who’s away from home, working as a flight attendant since Wei Wuxian was little enough to be left behind with his father. Wei Changze, who’s a romantic and loves to pamper his wife, saying how much he loves her and their son, someone who had so much love in his heart and was so nice and polite with everyone.

Wei Wuxian’s house was something of a safe haven for his closest friends, who all grew up with dysfunctional families and parents who either hated each other or were long dead. So many people in school envied Wei Wuxian because of his parents, even jokingly asking if they wanted to adopt.

“Wei Wuxian?” Jiang Cheng called from the phone after his friend suddenly shut up “Hey, answer me.”

He didn’t know what to do, or what to think, even less what to feel. Wei Wuxian just stood there frozen, phone still against his ear while Jiang Cheng got more and more worried about him.

“...the car right now and coming there, ok? Just please say something.” Jiang Cheng’s voice kept getting scared, but Wei Wuxian couldn’t focus on him.

Suddenly, he felt very angry. Pissed. Enraged. He was feeling hurt, lost, disappointed. How could his father do this? How dare he. And inside of the house he shared with his wife, when nobody but him was home. This was something Wei Wuxian thought only Jin Guangshan could do - he is a disrespectful son of a bitch -  and not his father. Not Jiang Fengmian.

“Is this what you do when you’re alone?” Wei Wuxian asked loudly, startling the coup- them.

Jiang Fengmian jumped out of Wei Changze’s lap, looking every bit a man who was just making out, eyes wide in shock, while his lover quickly tried to look less… like he was doing what he was doing. Wei Wuxian couldn’t help but feel more anger bubble up inside of him, his heart beating hard and loud against his chest.

“A-Xian…” he called, an uncomfortable smile on his bruised lips “This is not-”

“This is exactly what I think it is.” Wei Wuxian was furious.

“Wei Wuxian?” Jiang Cheng called him almost sofly, making Wei Wuxian realize the situation he was in.

“You know what? Fuck you.” he turned around and wore his shoes sloppily, trying to get out of there as fast as he could.

“A-Xian!” his father yelled before he closed the door and dashed to the stairs.

“Jiang Cheng.” he whimpered against his phone “Are you here?”

The Wei family lived on the eight floor of the building, and Wei Wuxian had the brilliant idea of taking the stairs. Laughing wetly, he almost cursed at himself. He should probably call Lan Zhan.

“Not yet, but soon. What happened?”

How could he say something like that through the phone?

“Remember how your mother always envied my mother because she thought your father was in love with her? And used this on the court when they were getting divorced?” Wei Wuxian forced his voice not to shake, his tears not to fall. Not yet, not until he was safely away from here. He jumped a few steps and almost fell, his backpack swinging violently against his back.

“How could I forget?” Jiang Cheng scoffed.

“Yeah… It wasn’t mom he was in love with.” Wei Wuxian’s voice wobbled at the end.

“...What.”

“Jiang Cheng I just caught dad making out with yours. In my living room. While mom’s away somewhere in Italy.” his voice was so choked it was almost incomprehensible.

“WHAT?!”

Wei Wuxian finally stopped, breathing hard and legs trembling with the effort it took him to get to the building’s ground floor. He really hoped neither of the men were waiting for him at the lobby, Wei Wuxian didn’t want to see them right now, he just wanted Jiang Cheng to arrive now and take him away from here.

“I’m here, come.”

Wei Wuxian dashed, not looking anywhere but the door, opening so fast he almost beat his face against it. He ran to his best friend’s car, the door already open for him. When he was inside, he remembered to disconnect the call, turning the silent mode on for the first time in a while and screamed against his shaking hands.

“That fucker.” Jiang Cheng said, his car’s tires screeching against the asfalt as he drove recklessly until they got to the main road. His voice was shaking, his eyes furious “I can’t believe it.” he punched the steering wheel “Wasn’t it enough to tear his own marriage now he’s doing it to your family, too? Bastard!”

Feeling exhausted, Wei Wuxian took off his backpack, sighing loudly “I want to punch him.” he confessed “He was there sitting on the couch with fucking Jiang Fengmian sitting on his lap.”

Jiang Cheng inhaled sharply, looking so angry “Let’s go to a-jie tonight. Call your Lan Zhan later.”

“Lan Zhan. Yeah. Now I have to get married so I can not invite those two.” he laughed, “And mom can walk me to the altar.” his voice wobbled, tears gathering in his eyes once more “Shit, mom…”

“Fuck.” Jiang Cheng shook his head, stopping at a traffic light “I want to kill them just for her.”

“Imagine madam Yu when she hears about it.” Wei Wuxian tried to joke “Maybe we should just let her and mom deal with them.”

Jiang Cheng snorted “Do you think she will lend her lawyer to auntie?”

“She better.” Wei Wuxian laughed again, “Damn this is going to be so messy. Do you think Lan Zhan will still marry me?”

His only answer was a punch on his arm and a muttered “Dumbass.”

They kept silent the rest of the way, Jiang Cheng driving faster than normal so it wasn’t long until they arrived at the fancy condo Jiang Yanli lived with her husband, parking by the visitors car spot. Wei Wuxian called her before, asking if they could sleep there and saying vague things to explain, finally declaring that they needed to talk to her, a serious conversation.

“Do you think she’ll be fine? Is it bad for the baby?” Wei Wuxian asked in a whisper.

“...I don’t know.” Jiang Cheng sighed “But we shouldn’t hide it from her.”

Wei Wuxian sighed, too, opening the door and looking at his backpack for a moment “Should I call Lan Zhan?”

“I can take you there, if you want. Later. But, yes. Call him.” Jiang Cheng shrugged, looking exhausted before taking a deep breath and getting out of the car.

#mdzs #mdzs fanfiction #mdzs fic #the untamed fanfiction #the untamed #wangxian #wangxian fanfic #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan wangji #lan zhan #lan wangji x wei wuxian #wei changze #jiang fengmian #bisexual jiang fengmian #jiang cheng #jiang wanyin #cangse sanren #cangse sanren x wei changze #bisexual wei changze #jiang fengmian x wei changze #changmian #wwx parents are alive bc i want to #mo dao zu shi fanfic #modern mdzs #mo dao zu shi #modern au #good sibling jiang cheng #my writing #bnnywngs writing

[ongreenergrasses]

🎟 please.

absolutely! i hope you enjoy 💜

There’s an enormous crash from the kitchen, and Nicky looks up from his laptop.

“Joe?”

“Holy shit,” Joe yells in response.

Nicky assumes that this is because he knocked over one of the many boxes stacked up in the corners. After they won the lottery, the first order of business was to find a new, better, more convenient apartment, and now they’re packing.

(Buying a house together seemed a little over the top. Nicky is not opposed to doing so, or generally just being with Joe and following him around for the rest of his life, but this is not something he would tell a roommate.)

“Is everything okay?” Nicky calls back.

Joe skids around the corner. “We have to go. Grab your stuff.”

“Okay,” Nicky says, and begins packing away his laptop.

“Not that. Well, maybe that. Whatever you can’t leave behind or be without. We have to go.”

“What?”

“Please, Nicky. We don’t have time.”

Nicky stares at him, and sees that Joe is shaking.

“Okay,” Nicky says, getting up and steering Joe to the bed, sitting down next to him. “Can you please tell me what is going on?”

Joe buries his face in his hands. Nicky hasn’t felt this helpless since he set fire to several pieces of onion that were caked to the stovetop and made the sprinklers go off.

“You’re going to hate me,” Joe says, muffled by his fingers.

“Joe! I could never hate you.” I love you, hangs on the tip of Nicky’s tongue. He swallows it back down.

“Okay. Okay.” Joe straightens up. “I have a brother.”

“Okay,” Nicky says slowly. He wasn’t aware of this before, but he knows Joe has a big family. “So do I.”

“My brother is crazy,” Joe says bluntly. “Not, you know. Clinically. But he’s completely insane.” It all comes out in a rush. “And we’re estranged, I love him but it’s for the best, but Samara told him about the money, and now he wants the money that we won. And he doesn’t have limits. So I’m worried he’ll do something to one or both of us to get the money, and we really have to go, now, Nicky.”

Nicky stares. “Your brother wants our money?”

“I don’t think he’s homicidal. But we need to go.”

“Homicidal?”

“Please, Nicky.” Joe turns the full force of his gaze on him, and Nicky never stood a chance, not against Joe’s enormous pleading (beautiful) eyes. “Let’s just go.”

Nicky stares around his room. He’s writing his dissertation. Will he need to leave school? Will he ever come back here? What if he stayed, and Joe left? Would he be safe?

He looks back at Joe. His mind has already been made up, long before this. He could never leave Joe. Not ever.

“Okay,” he says.

One of the perks of having an enormous amount of lottery money is that they’re able to get to the airport and be on the next flight out of the country without even making a dent in their finances. Nicky stares at the cover of his passport. He didn’t expect to ever leave the country again, let alone so soon.

Joe coughs next to him. Then coughs again.

“Are you all right?” Nicky asks, turning to face him.

“Why did you come with me?” Joe scuffs the toe of his shoe on the hideous airport carpet. “You could’ve stayed. This is ridiculous, I’m sure you would’ve been fine.”

“I…”

It’s the worst possible time for this. Nicky knows that. But Joe asked him a question, and this situation is entirely terrifying and entirely out of their control. The least that Nicky could do is answer honestly.

“I love you,” he says frankly. “And you said that we needed to go. So we’ll go.”

“You love me?”

“Yes,” Nicky says. His voice doesn’t waver. He’s never been so sure about anything. “And I trust you. So if you think that we needed to leave together, I know that it is for the best. For both of us.”

“I didn’t know that,” Joe says. His voice sounds very small. “I wish I had.”

“I’m sorry,” Nicky says, because the look on Joe’s face is spreading an icy, horrible feeling throughout his chest. “I should not have said anything.”

“No, I’m glad you did.” Joe looks at Nicky, then leans over, and tentatively takes his hand. “I - love you. Too. I love you too, Nicky.”

“Huh,” Nicky says intelligently. He looks around. There’s at least thirty people surrounding them at their gate, and they’re both wearing masks. It’s probably the worst possible time for this.

He feels Joe’s hand on his chin, tentatively guiding Nicky’s face back to his. “Can I kiss you, Nicky?”

Nicky whips off his mask so fast that he nearly tears it. He doesn’t care. “Yes, Joe, please - ”

Joe pulls his own mask down, and then kisses him, in the airport, in front of all those people. It makes Nicky feel as if he should be embarrassed, but all he feels is joy.

“I’m glad we have each other,” Joe whispers against his lips. “And that we’re doing this together.”

“Me too,” Nicky says, and kisses him again. He really did win the lottery, in more ways than one.

emoji prompts

#ask and you shall receive #scriggle-scraggle #prompts #the old guard #joe x nicky #yusuf al kaysani #joe al kaysani #nicolo di genova #nicolò di genova #i hope you like this!! it departed a little from the prompt and got long but oh well #sorry abt the weird read more break too there wasn’t really a good place to put it

[kay-oc-rambles]

Okay it's been a hot minute since I thought about the first of my Stardew Valley OCs, Cas (even though I made a whole ass sideblog for her that I ended up never using)

But more importantly, I am thinking of an AU. Where some magic shit goes bad & she gets stuck in a time loop (me? Thinking about time loops? What a surprise)

So for context, when I first played SDV it was on my laptop. I think in my very first file I was dating Sebastian, then lost interest in the game. Later I came back & made a new file. After a little while I ended up adding mods (mostly quality of life like faster walking speed, infinite health/stamina, not passing out at 2am, but I think the thing that ultimately screwed me was no crows. For some reason that mod did not play well with other mods). I married Leah in spring of year 2, as soon as I could. And then like 3 days later, the game crashed & the file is corrupted. I was upset of course, deleted a bunch of mods (I had so many mods y'all, though some of them were for hair/clothes bc I'm a sucker for dress up shit). Also at some point before the crash I made my OC Cas & changed the file data to be her.

I started a new save file & this time I went for Harvey (still playing as Cas). Once again, over that first winter I finally got enough hearts so as soon as that first spring of year 2 rain hit, I bought a mermaid pendant.

And then 3 days after marrying Harvey, the game crashed. File corrupted.

At this point I had logged roughly 80 hours across those files & I was so pissed off at losing ANOTHER save file. I gave up.

Flash forward to later I decide to buy the game on my phone. I don't think I got through year 1 before losing interest.

Then I get it for the switch one summer. I play as Cadmus. I play for a while but can't decide who to marry. Eventually put down the game. Then sometime later I find out my brother has sdv on the switch so we start a co-op together, thus my making another OC, Bea.

Recently my brother was like "hey we should start playing stardew again" so we picked up that co-op file, I decide that I'm gonna marry Leah. I also decided after he had enough for the day that I wanted to keep playing so I opened up the Cadmus save file.

Initially I was thinking that for this file, I wanted to marry someone other than Leah or Harvey. My brother suggests Sebastian, & I go with it (in part because back when I first played I was considering him, & also he looks like he could be Anubis's emo brother so why not put Cadmus with the purple haired emo bangs guy?).

But now I'm almost a year in marriage with Sebastian & I miss Harvey. Very much. Like, I'm heavily considering saving up to divorce Sebastian (and then saving up more to erase his memory that we were ever married bc I don't want him to be mad 😔). SO ANYWAY NOW WE GET TO THE POINT

Cas gets a time loop AU. Idk maybe the wizard's ex-wife decides to curse her for sneaking into her house to steal back the magic ink. 3 days after marrying Harvey, Cas gets sent back to her first day moving into Pelican Town. The first reset, she's just like "wtf is happening". She goes to the wizard about it but he thinks she's just crazy. She wonders if maybe it was all a dream so she goes on like normal. She marries Harvey again. 3 days later she gets reset. Now she KNOWS something magical is going on. She insists to Rasmodius that she has lived here for a couple years now. He's like "okay if both times it happened 3 days after marrying the doctor, which happened on a specific day, marry him on a different day?". So she speedruns it & manages to marry him fall year 1 (idk offhand if this is possible but I don't see why not). 3 days later, another reset. First person she goes to is Rasmodius. She has no proof of what's happening but he is getting a weird magical vibe off of her. They on trying to figure this shit out & in the meantime, Cas CANNOT give Harvey a mermaid pendant.

But one day Harvey decides to propose, and Cas can't bear to say no to him.

She & Rasmodius are scrambling to figure out SOMETHING, even if it's just a way to gather proof that will stay despite the reset.

3 days after marrying Harvey, Cas wakes up once again in her old apartment, ready to make the drive down to the valley. She cries. She actually puts off leaving for a couple days, until she gets a letter from Rasmodius. She finally goes, & Rasmodius actually visits her at the farm. He explains that something felt off when she didn't arrive as scheduled, he checked out the farm & there was residue of time magic or something. Hella cursed vibes stuck to Cas herself. She explains everything. They decide that maybe, until they can figure out what to do, Cas shouldn't even date Harvey (or anyone for that matter, just in case). She's a social person, she loves & misses all her friends in town, she especially misses Harvey, but she needs to stay distant.

It's not till year 3 of this loop, year 3 of just being friends, of keeping everyone at arms length while still helping them out (she finally gets the chance to finish the Community Center at least) that Rasmodius realizes it's his ex-wife that put this curse on Cas. He didn't even think she was capable of such a feat! But now that he knows the source, he can work to undo the curse.

Together they're able to figure out how to undo it, but Rasmodius asks if Cas wants to start over one more time, since in this loop she's spent 3 years keeping everyone at a distance. He could make it so that he remembers everything from this loop, so that once it resets, he can immediately break the curse & Cas can live normally. She briefly considers it but ultimately decides that she's tired of starting over. She's worked so hard & doesn't want to lose it all again. Besides, it's not like the town hates her, she's just earned a reputation as a loner who helps everyone out.

I'm honestly tempted to have something terrible happen that would *make* her wanna reset one more time. Or not even terrible but "Harvey marries someone else" or "Harvey has to close up the clinic & move to Zuzu City". But I also wanna give them a happy ending.

Maybe Rasmodius's ex decides to come after Cas right after they break the curse, she gets seriously injured & is taken to the clinic.

What if, once the curse is broken, Harvey remembers all the loops? The rest of the town has no clue, but since the curse centered on Cas marrying Harvey (technically Cas marrying anyone, but she only ever married Harvey), for whatever reason he regains his memories of those past loops.

So when Cas ends up in the clinic, he freaks out & patches her up but there's this whole heartfelt thing where he's like "I suddenly felt like I had spent the last few years falling in love with you", Cas explains it. They decide right there, no mermaid pendants, that they're gonna get married. The whole town is surprised because as far as they knew, Cas and Harvey were barely even friends, now they're suddenly getting married?????

(Cas is of course super anxious during the wedding & immediately after, but 3 days pass. 4. 5. A week. She's still here. Everything is fine. They live happily ever after.)

#cas #sdv oc #fan oc #idk i just love time loop angst

[calypsoff3]

Fifty Two.

Rylee: BUT it doesn’t bother me I just told you but you care don’t be so boring 🥱

Oakley: I ain’t tryna be boring I’m just saying

Rylee: BF in Cali and side in London 🤣

Oakley: U BAD!

Rylee: You already think I am bad soo….

“You have done nothing but smile at that phone” looking up at my mom “yeah, I know. I am just going to my room, well the shared shit” getting up from the couch, making my way to the bedroom “I also need to get something from the room” Tianna said behind me, rushing to the bedroom so I can lock it on her, she is always in my space. Mom has her own room, and we have to share which sucks because she keeps telling me to shut up because I am speaking on the phone too loud, this is not my fault she is in my space. I was about to shut the door but she barged in “oh brother, hurry up” I said but she shut the door “are you actually going to see him?” she asked me “maybe, I mean I got invited out” I shrugged “Rylee that is dad’ friend, don’t make the mistake I did. You have seen looks and you are all gooey inside, you have Melo that is so sweet to you, he is a bad boy. Don’t do what I did” she pleaded with me “oh my god, just be a sister Ti, why can’t you just stop being boring. Just because you got your ass beat now you acting holier then anyone” Tianna shook her head “I made a mistake ok, I was just like you. I thought he liked me, he is older then you are too, and you are going to run around with him, you wasn’t supportive of me. You snitched on me because you was concerned” rolling my eyes “Ti, you can either come with me or stay here and snitch, I really think he likes me because the way he is with me but he keeps saying my age, just stop being so dumb about things. Live life, damn. It’s London, nobody going to bite you” Tianna doesn’t like the idea, but I don’t care, I either go with her which will be easier for me, or I go alone which I will have to talk my parents into, I am not telling mom anything because she will just speak on how everything is wrong, she will need to tell dad, we don’t need that in life.

Tianna is being the annoying sibling she is but she can be, I am doing my own thing “mom, dad” I said walking out with my coat and everything on “huh” my mom looked at me “so like you know with the fact we are here, I haven’t got any gift for you or dad or anyone, can I go?” I asked looking at my dad and mom, they are both so boring since they went to the doctor’s appointment, my mom just sits with my dad watching TV and she is on the laptop, I haven’t seen this woman spend so much time with dad since, she is always next to him “in London? A place you don’t know, take Tianna with you” she said “no she doesn’t want to go, I will take an Uber there and back” which she doesn’t want to go “she will be ok” my dad said, I grinned but Tianna is not happy, and she can be “be back before eight, I mean it. If I have to send out a search part I will be livid, don’t do that to me” I smiled “I won’t, not my fault Tianna thinks you both aren’t worth presents” I chuckled “shut up” she is so moody “thanks mom” doing a little run over, kissing her cheek and then kissing my dad’ cheek “it’s so good to see you a little more you” whatever they changed he looks like him, I love that for him “ok, just go” he waved me off, this is on Tianna. She wants to be all innocent, I on the other hand, I am young and I want to have fun. Oakley and I could be very close friends, who cares anyways. I do like him, and I think he likes me too, we joke about random stuff, more so he laughs at himself, and I giggle like a dumb bitch.

I did a little run over to the car, he flashed the lights at me. I love this for me, look at me being picked up outside instead of a SUV outside my damn house to take me there. He reached over and opened the door for me “what’s up?” he said, he is always smiling. Dragging the door open and sitting inside “what’s up with you” banging the door shut “hey, relax. This is rented you know” letting out an oh “buy a car?” I questioned “no, it’s not worth it” cute little Range Rover, I like “I need to buy gifts now, I told my parents I am” I cringed “oh man, shopping? I didn’t say shopping, I said a little tour around the ends, I ain’t say that” he shook his head “Oh please, just let’s go, I won’t be long. Just a little sneak peak here” pushing my hood down on my coat, he is just staring at me down “man” he breathed out “you said lowkey, man. You pushing this shit bad” he shook his head “but yet here you are, I said we can just vibe, let’s be realistic. I am going to be eighteen soon. So?” he shook his head “soon, as in next year. This is some shit that will get me in trouble, damn” he mumbled to himself, he needs to get over himself because nobody will find out. I do actually like him a lot, I am not even joking about it, he is like so laid back about things, a little thug on the side, that is me. I find it funny how he says no he can’t do it but then he does, Oakley looked at me and he caught me staring and we both laugh “you dumb” he shook his head “you stay saying this but you like” he groaned out “just don’t speak” he waved me off.

My eyes darted to Oakley “is that for you?” I asked, those blue lights aren’t good at all “yeah, yeah. Don’t say anything, I am legit. They just hating” he pulled up to the side “oh my god, my parents will murder me, the police being here” now I an panicking, we are literally here and then this happens “just relax, it’s ok” rolling my eyes, leaning forward and grabbing my bag “officer” I gasped as someone tapped the window on my side “she is getting her bag, relax” Oakley said to him, they hating. The officer opened the door on my side “get out of the car” I pulled a face “man, this is rented. You can check, y’all always doing this” I shuffled out of the car “what is your name?” the officer asked “Rylee” looking at Oakley “how old are you?” I laughed “I don’t live here, I am visiting” asking me all these questions “don’t worry I ain’t kidnap her” this is just my luck “this is your fault” I said to him “I am clean, trust me. Don’t worry about it” shaking my head, if this leaks out my parents will go crazy on me badly “I feel bad, I really do you know” I didn’t say anything, they are searching the car now, I hope it’s nothing bad.

Looking for gifts is hard, I am just staring at them like I know what I am getting them, I am just starting at the jewellery, I mean Tianna will be easy “hey” Oakley bumped into me, looking away from the glass “huh” I love his smile so much, he is so cute “I feel bad, like I really do. That wasn’t supposed to happen. The police here are haters, I am so sorry. Like really am, I am smiling because you are making me laugh but I am sorry ok” he apologised so I will take that “that is fine, I can tell you feel bad” I grinned “help me choose for Tianna” I asked him looking back at the jewellery “what she like?” I breathed out as he stood right next to me “maybe a bracelet, that looks nice” he pointed “the heart thing is cute you know” he got a point “I think get your mom a nice bag and your dad, he loves board games” looking up at him “shut up” Oakley pulled a face at me “I am being serious, you know what we do at the studio? Play board games” pulling a face “mhmmm” the assistant came over to us and the way she did a double take, she knows who he is “have you chose?” Oakley moved away from me, I was enjoying his body heat actually next to me like that.

 

It tickles me how Chris and I are just boring, like literally the last few days on the lead up to Christmas we have done nothing but watch TV and I’ve just sat here watching with him while doing work on my laptop, it’s been cute because it’s not uncomfortable, it’s natural to us because I mean we have been married for so long and we do love each other “Ti, how come you didn’t go with her anyways?” She shrugged, I mean I am confused on why Tianna didn’t want to go “I’m going to FaceTime my friends” she got up and left “moody” my eyes dragged towards Chris, I have a feeling he’s feeling nausea, I just know his persona. I bet he hasn’t taken his nausea tablet either, the plus side he has stubble growing, he’s not shaved it off, this is good “got you” I said moving my laptop and reaching over, grabbing the trashcan, I’ve had this since, knowing my husband. Just in time he hunched over, and he felt sick in the trashcan, looking away from him as he puked, rubbing his back pulling a face “this is how I know you didn’t take the nausea tablets” shaking my head, this whole puking business makes me uneasy. Looking at him, he groaned out sitting back. Grabbing the tissues and reaching over to his mouth, wiping his mouth “did you forget the nausea tablets again” he nodded his head “well have some water” throwing the tissue in the trash can before getting up “here” passing the water bottle to him and walking off to get them, he always forgets the tablets, I don’t know why “I don’t forget them, just I don’t want to rely on that forever, I don’t want it” opening the cabinet door “right, but for now. You are on a high dosage Chris, you need to have the tablet, that is all” he is always trying something new and it doesn’t work.

I put my laptop away, I have done enough work for the day. I never switch off “you know, I should have told Rylee to get the Turkey” I mumbled to myself “no, just go somewhere. Don’t make the effort, it’s fine. We can just go somewhere” clearly he doesn’t want the effort “you know I haven’t got anything for anyone?” looking at Chris shrugging “neither have I but I am easily pleased” I laughed which actually made him laugh, he smiled at me, and I missed that, he put his head down “let me pay for the food tomorrow, it’s ok. I can get that sorted” nodding my head, I won’t step on his toes “I miss when the girls were little, I really do. Just seeing them grown, I dislike it. A lot too, just watching them grow, I miss the cute little pigtails and just running around, telling me that I need to come to their tea party” he smiled “I miss their tea parties” he is reminiscing “you got the better half of that really, I missed majority of it. I got the teenage phase and you are so lucky, you are literally the best dad” I like that Chris is thinking for himself now, he is feeling, I like it. This medication is better besides the sick but it could be fixed if he just take the other tablets, it would solve it all “then I turned into the least favourite person, I escalated without knowing and I am literally so laid back and they knew that, I wish I could take back what I did with Tianna, she did that but it’s mistakes we all make them and as teenagers sex happens, just doing it the right way. Also like with my son’s, I didn’t actually get to know them and they are growing, I really didn’t know what I wanted in life. I had a home in California, and I was just there” looking at him in sadness “you may see it as mistakes, but the kids love you despite what you think, you are still the best dad. Honestly, don’t ever worry about that” he really is though “not the best husband really” I sighed out “Chris we have had a lot going on and thinking back you was neglected to the point where even I didn’t understand why, like I thought you hated me. When you was good, you was good. When you was bad, you was bad but the good outweighs a lot of it because one thing about you Chris you hated to see me ever in pain, you hated that and you would make sure I am ok, always. Just like I do you, it’s love Chris, I love you, and you love me” Chris nodded his head, didn’t say anything though.

Chris sleeps early, like I mean early, he went to sleep. My nosey ass checked, I mean I took a risk because he could have been awake and then what, but he wasn’t. He was asleep with the light on which he never did, but I left it. It literally made my heart pound against my chest, he always knows his side to sleep on, and it hasn’t changed, but he is asleep so it’s ok. He is at peace “ok but don’t you think you should tell mom at least, she has always said don’t keep secrets” oh the girls are tussling “tell me what?” I asked, Rylee groaned out “Ti is just a hater, I can’t even” what is happening with these two “it’s not even that, you are just assuming I am because I care, I went through it” I shushed the girls “please, your dad is asleep, what is it?” Rylee huffed out “can I speak to my mom alone!” she spat, looking at Ti “by all means but I am trying to save you from yourself, I am helping” Tianna walked off, I wonder what the hell is happening now “so, erm. I didn’t want to say because you may just say I am doing wrong but I am not doing wrong, so me and Oakley” I squinted my eyes “wait” I stopped her “Oakley as in your dad’ rapper friend whatever?” Rylee nodded her head “yeah, so we have been talking like messaging” oh this is going south “you mean you like him? I have seen you so smitten with him; I am not blind that boy is an adult! You are a child, you have a boyfriend at that” Rylee huffed out “when I said Uber, it was Oakley and he took me but then like you know, he was driving a fancy car and the car got stopped outside Selfridges but the police let him go, nobody knows and then Tianna is a snitch! Nothing bad happened, he took me shopping, just a friend” is this girl real “does Melo know?” she shook her head “you lied to me and your dad!? Are you serious, why are you doing this when your dad is not well right now, you stupid girl. He is an adult and you have a crush! Get over it before I send you back home, he should know better too! When I tell your dad” Rylee gasped “no mom, it’s not his fault. He is so kind to me, he literally said he will take me shopping, that was it. Please mom, I am eighteen soon, I know he likes me too” I gasped “get the fuck out of my face!” I barked “now!” I shouted, now she got me screaming in this apartment, she ran off. This girl is acting beyond her age and on top of that the boy is twenty plus, what the fuck, she has a boyfriend. Rylee banged the door, and this is going to be my second calling, because why would she do that. Stomping to the bedroom, Ti and Rylee are arguing now, opening the door “shut up! Both of you, Ti you sleep with me and you! Give me your phone” Rylee stared “please no, oh my god! You can’t do this” she is going to cry “why is everyone arguing” looking down hallway and at Chris room, oh he is skinny, skinny still “erm” I stumbled on my words, I haven’t seen his body since “girls” I just said, looking away and in the bedroom “out, Tianna. You, I will be back, Chris go to sleep, it’s fine” I said that while not looking at him, but I don’t like seeing that, the doctor said gradual weight gain but I want him to be him again, it hurts to look.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction #Chrianna Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfiction

[sharloola]

my eggs keep going bad

And I like to say it’s because I live alone now and food goes off a lot quicker when my brothers aren’t in the same house but I only buy the small carton and four eggs isn’t a lot at all so actually the reason my eggs go bad is because I don’t use them. I keep buying eggs and they keep going bad because most days I can only muster the energy to only make ramen because ramen is better than nothing and if I add two eggs that’s almost a real meal so I say “Okay. You’ll just eat this today. And tomorrow it will be something better because you will love yourself by then and go grocery shopping.” But then tomorrow comes and it’s two weeks later and the eggs are bad again so I throw them in the bin and I think that there might be something wrong with me.

I tend to twist my words when I don’t want to be me which happens a lot because I’ve managed to forget how my body feels and if I have to be me I don’t think my bones will remember how not to break so sometimes words like “is” pretend they are words like “might be” because if you stretch out the truth people get distracted in the gaps and don’t realise your mouth is missing. I think there has always been something wrong with me and the problem with knowing there’s something wrong with you and doing nothing else but thinking about it is that you always know there’s something wrong with you and you know exactly what caused it and how you got here and why you keep buying eggs but you don’t know why you can’t cry these days or if you always hated being here.

I should like being here because my friends hold me and every sunset looks like love has fallen out of the sky and there are a million things I could do but sometimes I think so much about not being here even when sunset blazes and my friends are holding me. I feel so guilty that their arms are wrapped around a dead thing but they keep asking me if I’m okay the same way I keep buying eggs and I keep saying I’ll be fine and I don’t think any of us believe it but I’m not sure if people like us have any other options so I laugh for good measure and feel bad that I can’t say how I’m really feeling as I read articles about how it’s good to say how you’re really feeling which I know is true because I read a lot about brains like mine and I think I am a smart person but then again I don’t know if a smart person would waste as many eggs as I do and I think I’m going to break my mothers heart. 

Only because if she ever finds out how many eggs I have thrown away she will probably realise that I was never any good with money and if she realises that her entire version of me might unravel until only a shadow remains and my dad will look over her shoulder and be so humiliated by the whole ordeal that he won’t even acknowledge it. My mum likes to tell the story of how I was born premature against all the odds and how my tiny barely developed hands ripped off the oxygen mask which signalled to the doctor that I was stronger than anyone thought but if she finds out about the eggs she might realise that I didn’t need that mask because I have never needed to breathe. I have never breathed because I have always been so terrified to make the wrong move that even a breath seemed too risky but everyone called that sensible and said I must be smart because they had never seen a child read so many books but no one ever asked me why I read so much and maybe if they had all those words in my head could have explained that I was suffocating and only books seemed to listen to me but I don’t read much these days anyway. 

I try to when I’m on the train which is fine until I remember people can see me then I forget how to read and start thinking about how all my particles are occupying space and how the eggs in my bag might be cracked and spilling over my laptop right now and god. I know it’s ridiculous to think about eggs this much but they break so easily sometimes I mistake them for the skin of my fourteen year old self and I save recipes every so often with very few steps and cold ingredients because I know what I’m like and that I’d probably be less tired if I ate like everyone else did. I add the ingredients to my shopping list and imagine myself going to the kitchen but then the thoughts catch up and I’m glued to my bed again and wondering how a shadow can be so heavy. I try to teach myself how to breathe but by the time I’ve realised that’s futile it’s time to leave the house again and check if I paid the water bill and balance my limbs enough to pass as human and maybe I can be better this time if I just talk less and feel more maybe I just need to buy more eggs.

s.o.

#going batshit crazy over eggs #prose #prose poetry #spoken word #eggs #tw depressing thoughts #sharloola

[planet-magic-land]

putting personal vent under a keep reading bc maybe venting about it Somewhere will help (self harm suicide mention, probably delete later)

Mum has now declared that the "house has spyware in it" so now my Mum;

- is blaming my Dad for crappy adverts she's seeing when she's going on crummy sites, stating he's "hacked our internet" and is.. sending these ads to these sites she's visiting himself, so not allowed to have the internet on when she's home (((:

- she's decided that my brother's wife and predictably now my brother is also apparently in on all this too, she's completely cut communication off from them, but won't tell them what they've supposedly done wrong bc they "already know what they've done" and them literally sending her two letters asking why she's cut them off and in turn missed out on seeing their newest daughter grow up is just them "playing dumb to guilt trip her"

- she's decided that spam mail (you know, the stuff everybody gets through their door) is now also targeted harassment towards her

- she told one of my Aunts (I overheard them in the kitchen) that I wanted to change my name because "deadname is what my Dad always called me" so that's the sole reason I want to change it apparently, first of all I did not give her permission to tell others I'm changing my name, and secondly I have NEVER stated or even hinted that that's why I want to change my name, ever, so I guess she is effectively lying to other family members to get them on her side and make my Dad out to be an even bigger villain than he apparently already is? either that or she somehow genuinely thinks that's why I'm changing my name, either way it absolutely sucks lol

- apparently the laptop's camera and built in mic is also hacked so my Dad and my brother and his wife are always listening in to our conversations, despite this laptop being new and literally only me and my mum ever touching it (also when I got a antivirus on it to scan for anything malicious and Surprise Surprise there was literally nothing, she simply stated that that antivirus just "doesn't work")

- she's accused me of being involved based off of nothing, multiple times in the past, this had pushed my mental health to the point of falling back to self harming and suicidal thoughts, and when I finally told her this none of it seemed to actually get through to her and her response to me almost getting close to killing myself because of her accusations towards me was "and who'd you think would get the blame for that"

- and now yeah, apparently the house has spyware in it too, could not be bothered to ask her to elaborate (not that she would have even if I did ask her, because there is nothing to elaborate on other than another accusation)

I can't feel like I can talk to my own family, bc me living with her they'd inevitably ask Me why she's cut them off, and I can't tell them the truth bc if she found out I'd told them then that leaves me in a completely fucked position, and moving out isn't an option bc Money to buy a place, and Money to Keep a roof over my head, and it is apparent, that no matter how many times we might move, or change the internet, or get antivirus software, there will always be Something, bc none of those things will ever stop her from going on her phone, going on those dodgy sites herself, or anything like that, and blaming any of it on anyone other than herself.

[muddi-gutz]

The one thing about if I started using procreate is that I’d have to buy an iPad and that’s basically like investing in another laptop when I have a perfectly good one right here with a bunch of stuff on it already

#bc the one I want is $1’000+ #which is like. whatever. I’ll be able to afford that with one pay check. sure it’ll be most of it but yknow #but hmmm #I’ve wanted procreate for a long time #idek lmfao maybe I’ll talk to my parents about it #maybe my brother could buy my laptop off of me or something #bc I know he probably wants one #OH WAIT FUCK WHAT WILL I PLAY MINECRAFT ON #OOHHHHH I COULD USE MY SURFACE PRO FOR GAMING AND MY IPAD FOR ART #GENIUS THOUGHTS HERE NOTHING BUT GENIUS THOUGHTS #OK YEAH IM GONNA SAVE UP FOR AN IPAD <3 #muddi thoughts

[to-star-lake]

in the early days when you joined bonten as their new advisor, you spent a lot of time with koko; drawing up business plans, managing the books, overseeing construction on new clubs and buildings.

koko had the nicest office of all of the bonten leaders. it was on the top floor of a highrise in the middle of the shibuya business district. complete with high-end leather and mahogany furniture, and a gorgeous city view.

you'd spent time with each of the bonten executives when you joined and koko was probably your favorite to work with. you found takeomi too serious, kakucho boorish, mochi too macho, the haitani's were exhausting, and sanzu..well..

koko was like you; blunt and efficient with work, a little impatient, maybe a little condescending. you enjoyed your daily work with him in his office. it was always quiet, productive, and his assistants always served the best sencha.

except today.

today when you walked in through the mahogany double doors that led to his office, you were almost decked in the face by a toy rubber basketball.

"he shoots! he scores? no! he misses!" you heard a voice yell, followed by a maniacal cackling.

what...the hell is this? the floor of koko's office, which was normally clean, surgically clean, was littered with teddy bears, squeak toys, board games with their pieces strewn about haphazardly, a jump rope, a putting green, and a trash bin overflowing with crumpled candy wrappers.

the rubber basketball that almost hit your head rolled towards the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves on one end of the room and you saw a kiddie basketball hoop attached to one of the shelves. and below that, sanzu, flopped on his stomach on the floor, a different flavored ring pop on each of his fingers.

"koko..i'm really bad at basketball," he grumbled, picking himself up and walked over to koko's desk, slamming his hands down on the surface, the sudden gust of wind almost blowing the stack of papers in front of koko away.

"oh no, well, why don't you go try the putt putt?" koko sighed, not even looking up from his work, waving his hand in the air like he was shooing away a fly. "ah, y/n! finally, someone sane. please, get over here, i need you to look at something," koko waved you over when he noticed you standing in the doorway.

you made your way across the minefield of toys on the floor and greeted sanzu as he walked past you. "good morning," you smiled cordially.

he sauntered past you, looking down at you through bloodshot, half-shut eyes, his usual sinister smile plastered wide across his face. he'd opened his mouth to say, "good morning, little prin-" but then stepped on a pile of toy soldiers and tripped, tumbling to the floor, his long limbs getting all tangled up in themselves.

"uh... hey, koko?" you took a seat in the armchair beside the desk, setting your laptop down on the tabletop. "what's going on here? where's mikey?"

koko let out an exasperated sigh, rolling his eyes. "sometimes mikey goes off on his own, and when he does, the rest of us have to take turns...babysitting," he nodded at the gangly man with bubblegum colored hair with a plastic toy putter in his hands. "i pulled the short straw today," he sighed, pushing the large binder of documents he was looking at over to you.

"koko!!"

"jesus, what now?" koko looked up, so annoyed you could almost see the steam coming out his ears.

"there's no balls," sanzu pointed at the putting green on the floor.

"well, who decided to ambush people by pelting them with the balls outside the bathroom last time?"

sanzu stared back at koko blankly.

"ugh, nevermind. could you play with something else? y/n and i have work to do." koko scooted his seat closer to you, and began circling a few line items on the page in front of you. "got this today from the guys over at the club in akasaka. these totals look off to you?"

you glanced over the document, and flipped back a few pages and reviewed the itemized lists also included in the binder. "damn," you said, looking up at koko. "these assholes are skimming."

koko opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a sudden loud popping noise. both of you turned to see sanzu on the floor, pulling the heads off of a pile of barbie and ken dolls.

koko raised his hands to his temples, the frown lines between his eyebrows deepening by the second. "jesus christ, this psychotic clown, if he wasn't the number 2 I swear to god-” he muttered under his breath.

"hey, sanzu?" you called out and sanzu's head jerked up to look at you, his eyes suddenly bright and attentive, like a child amongst the sea of toys on the floor.

"yes, princess?" he called back.

"could you go on a coffee run for us?"

sanzu tilted his head a little, confused. "a coffee...run?"

"yeah...you know, to buy coffee?"

he blinked, still confused.

"to buy...starbucks?"

"ah! you want me to buy you starbucks," he suddenly shot up.

"yes! yes, please, for me and koko, that would be great," you smiled, thinking you were finally getting somewhere with him.

he walked over to the desk. "anything for you, princess. and you can call me haru," he hummed, taking a bright pink ring pop off his finger and sliding it onto your ring finger, and a blue one onto koko's ring finger. "be back in a flash."

he turned to walk out of the office, whistling and not bothering to avoid the toys scattered on the floor, simply stepping on them as he went.

the doors closed behind him and you turned to koko, "now we can get some work done."

"let's hope he takes his time," koko rolled his eyes, sliding the ring pop off his finger, holding onto only the plastic part as gingerly as possible, a disgusted look on his face because he could tell sanzu had definitely licked the candy already.

"is it always like this when mikey's away?"

"sanzu? yeah, pretty much. but mikey tolerates him cus he's been with him longer than any of us, he's his loyal mad dog," koko sighed. "but that bastard's insane. apparently back in the day he got moved back and forth between all of mikey's captains cus nobody could handle him."

"wow. yeah, i guess i can see that," you glanced over at all the toys scattered on the floor. "seems pretty tough for you too."

"oh, i've actually done the best with him," koko scoffed. "last time, he was the haitani brothers' responsibility, they decided to take him to a hostess club. thought it'd be a good distraction for him. crazy maniac decided to pay for all the women there."

"all of them? that's..that's a lot-"

"no, that's not the crazy part. he paid for all the women, and then made them line up against the wall with liquor bottles on top of their heads and he used them for target practice." koko ran a hand through his hair, sighing. "anyway, who knows when he's gonna be back so we should try to get as much done as possible while he's away."

you nodded. the two of you worked dilligently, reviewing the rest of the books collected from bonten's other clubs and businesses in town, making one stack for ones that pass, and one that required additional scrutiny.

after a while, you stretched your arms up over your head, noticing the sun hung high in the sky and glanced at the clock on the wall. it read 12:15.

"i wonder where he is," you said, realizing it'd been almost two and a half hours since he left.

"who knows what that lunatic gets up to," koko sighed, turning the page of the binder he was leafing through.

"i actually could've used some coffee though," you yawned.

"i can have my girls make some sencha-"

just then the doors to his office burst open, and sanzu staggered in, eyes blood red, a blue gift bag in one hand, the other dragging a giant 10-foot teddy bear behind him.

"and suddenly my headache's back," koko muttered and sanzu approached the two of you at the desk.

sanzu dragged the huge teddy bear over and plopped it beside you. "i got this for you, princess."

"hah..um...where'd you get this..giant thing?" you didn't even know where to begin.

"there's a carnival downtown. i got it playing a shooting game," he grinned from ear to ear. koko groaned, knowing sanzu, by 'shooting game' he probably meant he threatened to shoot the person manning the booth if he didn't give him the bear.

"hah..i see, thank you. but why is it missing its eyes?" you asked, looking at the bear's face and noticing the eyeballs had been ripped out, only some tattered threads remained in the sockets.

"they were ugly," sanzu shrugged. "koko, i got you something too," he dropped the gift bag down in front of koko.

"thanks.." koko reached into the bag and pulled out a tiny cross-stitched sweater which could've only been made for an infant. "uh...dude, what is this?"

"it's a sweater for your chihuahua," sanzu explained, yawning and plopping down onto a chair by the desk.

"i don't have a chihuahua?"

"i could've sworn you did," sanzu tilted his head, as though in deep thought. "oh, i guess it's just you that's always yapping. it's amazing y/n puts up with this every day," he laughed, but his tone was filled with hostility.

you saw koko's body tense in your periphery and you quickly spoke up to diffuse the sudden tension. "haru, did you get coffee?"

"coffee? oh! the starbucks. yes, i did."

you stared back at him. "that's great, uh...so where is it?"

"on the corner of harajuku square, by yoyogi station," he smiled.

"what?"

"oh my god," koko groaned, raising his palms to his eyes and rubbing them in circles.

you looked back and forth between koko and sanzu.

koko took a deep breath and leaned back in his chair, turning to look at you. "he bought the starbucks."

#sanzu haruchiyo #sanzu haruchiyo x reader #bonten x reader #tokyo revengers fluff #tokyo revengers x reader #sanzu fluff #sanzu x reader #despite being no.2 sanzu is bonten's baby you can't convince me otherwise #bontens murder baby #he just needs to be entertained ok #and he's just a *little* jealous of you and koko