#maybe im getting too ahead of things

[vse-kar-vem]

together in every universe. or something

#bojan cvjetićanin #kris guštin #joker out #im neglecting schoolwork to draw this but that seems like the norm at this point #hoping if i get it all out of my system now i'll be normal during exam szn (in like. a week 😨) #<<sorry if i keep talking about school btw (semi age reveal ahead) gcses are fucking killing me uuaghhgshhahhhaj #i actually quite like this since i started drawing on a whim this afternoon and its only ten now #i dont even mind the lineart (DONT LOOK AT BOJANS HAND OR ILL JUMP OUT A WINDOW) #only a one storey one tho 💗💗💗 can't die without seeing bokris irl <<pipe dream as im too embarrassed to go to a concert #NO because bumping into jo in london would be my worst fucking nightmare 😭😭😭 #what do i even fucking say 'hey are you jan from jo--' NO id combust on the spot #and what if im bothering them uknow 😭😭 idk but i used to live in an asian city where none of my idols from the west would ever visit #(except safiya love you safiya) so keeping the real life person and fictiinalized versions apart in my brain and/or at arms length was easy #but now that i live in the uk and the chances of seeing them irl are non-zero? and presented with the chance to #actively seek them out and you know go to a concert #im just too scared and awkward to do it #maybe i'll bully my friend into going with me #i feel safer revealing age more in the fucking depths of these tags but another thing that makes me feel awkward about going is age #like ik lots of jo fans are younger than me and there's no shame at all in bringing your parents i just feel so embarrassed?? to??? #like i'd rather go with my friends #but that would require at least us riding the train alone and i am a small east asian girl who never looks up from the floor ever #sooooo #not happening any time soon #maybe next yr?? but probably not #unless i suddenly get a lot more independant and cool #i doubt anyone's read this much of my tags but if you have 😭😭 hope you like the art i guess #at the time of me writing i want to draw more but i'll see #(you will know since it will have been posted) #a tag previously used to say 'queueing to post at school' this is false as i am now in fact nauseous at home #my art

[fuckingstupidbracket]

like a regular bin, not even recycled or anything

#poll #okay so uh #dont read the tags ahead unless you care about my little vent #my mom got me a hoodie in December from shein #even tho i had two very similar hoodies already both from better brands #still fast fashion but not as fast #and one of them was modded by me #but the hoodie was fucking soft and comfy and good length so it quickly became my favourite hoodie #according to my mother tho after a month she started complaining that it's ugly. #it had those little balls idk what they're called but #1 i don't fucking care #2 they're removable #so anyway fot the past week or two shes been complaining every time i wore the hoodie and today she screamed at me and threw it in the trash #she also kicked me but thats unrelated #and like even if she bought me a new identical one that wouldn't help at all cause she still threw my stuff in the trasg #and bought from a company that goes against my values #and she keeps excusing it like “its cheaper” #im sorry but buying one good thing and wearing it too death is cheaper than buying a hundred things you throw away after less than 3 months #so fucking sick of this!!!!!!!! #i have more than enough clothes too and am currently trying to get rid of some #BUT NOT LIKE THAT WHAT THE FUCK #btw my vinted is dupiarz it's mostly stuff from 2017-2020 so not really trendy but maybe youd like something #the pnly clothing i dont bother repairing and just throw out is underwear #but i do fix socks because good socks are good socks

[kirnet]

seriously considering wiping my last like 10 hours of gameplay to restart the shadowlands bc of how mad i am at this moonrise bs

#bg3 spoilers #im going in with the harpers and ive tried the fight like 6 separate times #but im bling. cant misty step out. cant use my aoes. cant dispell the darkness with sunlight. cant hit a damn thing #cant magic missile cant use my bonus actions cant fly while i have my potion of flying #i had already beaten it too! and then the harpers went aggro and i had to reload! #i have fun with hard fights if theres more strategy but idk. maybe im just stupid!! #but when i try to go around and look for alternate areas of entry my ass keeps getting blasted with radiant damage?? #i kind of want to see what the underdark route has in store but im worried im gonna miss out on the character stuff if i do that #ill try it again later but ugh. im buffed out the ass with potions and equipment and i still cant walk 5 feet ahead. its not fun #ramblings #mina plays bg3

[lesbiacnh]

omg i get a little stressed and to cope i end up playing esthetician until 130 am and go to bed feeling worse than before. and like id pluck every leg hair out but haven’t brushed my teeth yet. and after that my skin gets soo bad and im like whattttt why is this uappening.

#text #the past couple of months have been crayzeeeeeee but now things are cslm. but im still 🫨🫨🫨 mentally bc im not in a good routine or anything #it always starts bc im like ‘i need to take better care of myself’ and then ends badly. lol #tiktok ‘everything shower’ joke kinda made me get back into the strange habit of doing the absolute bare minimum + doing everything in one #night and feeling worse. instead of like having a more consistent routine #rly i need to start working out again. it helps me regulate things bc i like to plan ahead lol #im on anxiety meds now so im gonna TRYYYYYY to help myself by getting in a better routine #AND BY THAT. i mean SLOWLY bc ive gone through this cycle before and and starting things all on the same day is a variant of this. #and i gotta get off my phone. my neck fucking hurts from sitting weird and scrolling too long #tiny bit cringy to admit but i want to find a stim toy that i could do the same scroll motion on. if that makes sense #like a smooth peice of metal or something. maybe i’ll buy a little keychain and see if that could replace the motion while im chillin doing #something else #SORRY if anyone does read this usually i reread my posts to make sure im coherent before posting but its 140 something am and im high again #ALSO 2024 resolution im done being high on most week nights. i need to calm down w it #ok last thing bc this is funny #phoebe bridgers song came on while i was driving home and the one lyric was like im not afraid of going back to school……. #and it hit me in that exact moment bc I AMMMMMM AFRAID TO go back to school but im not‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ it’s fine‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ i am not gonna #ok goodnight. i brushed my teeth #sabotage this.

[catmemey]

newness? maybe.

#big tags ahead fyi #last chapter in the [redacted] saga probably for a little bit #i responded to his message from last night #i didnt want to go overboard with being affectionate in a romantic way or anything #so i went a softer route of thinking about how he's my closest friend and I still want to tell him what he means to me #so... it was still extremely genuine and i was vulnerable in saying all that #but... then his response was like. 'i think i get a bigger picture and maybe misunderstood what you had said' #and im internally like. wait. what do you mean. what did you misunderstand. #why does it sound like you think i only like you as a friend #because i dont but it felt selfish to dump all that on him #and he even apologized for dumping some of the things he said on me #but anyways. i panicked a little bit. #i guess i didnt want him to get the impression i wasnt interested at all #so i sent an obscure message being like 'well if its not selfish to say then i actually would have said more #but it felt selfish to say all that' #and then he was like 'well maybe i'll say one last thing. it isnt selfish to speak your mind.' #'and id rather be honest with each other if nothing else happens' #so i was like well ok here's my chance #and said that i want to and would date him if he was single and exclusive #and then he was basically like 'yeah me too but i care too much about [my gf] to end it' #which i knew #its just.......... a lot. #and i offered some advice about his relationship if he wanted #as long as he didnt care if it was hard hitting #and he was like 'sure let me see how you throw those punches' #so i lobbed some heavy questions at him #and he was like 'those werent bad. i cant say i know the answer to any of them' #so mission accomplished there i guess? #but... he said he wanted to have some time to himself to think everything over #which is very fair. there's so much

[andromerot]

started reading deathless btw um. i dont like it

#yeah besides how cringe and silly the portrayal of leninism is. so incredibly silly. #i just cant do fairytale retellings. i get mad. theres a couple out there i like but they need to be doing v specific things that this is #not doing. #i get why people on here like her work though! good writing style but this is too. eh #whatever i should have seen this coming. ive spied ahead and idk if its gonna pick up but maybe ill save it to read when im tired #and i would probably enjoy her short stories which i think she has. i think fairytale retellings work a lot better in smaller formats

[erichtmercury]

CHAINSAW MAN PART 2 HITTING JULY 13TH IM IN SHOCK

#july is so fucking STACKED like r u kidding me? #stranger things 4 finale plus WWDITS season 4 and now this!!!bby i’m delighted #nayuta denji found family n the hunt for blood devil in hell with HOPEFULLY yoshida and reze coming along w denji #high school trio takes on devils in hell after bonding in classes/yoshida seek out denji at school maybe? kishibe asks him to keep an eye #and reze is a surprise but kishibe revives or whatever from the devil hybrids storage locker makima was keeping them in #basically he’s inherited at least a fraction of makima’s position and resources at public safety #quanxi maybe will train denji alongside kishibe like she’ll teach him more abt how they’re kind fights like how reze started too!!! #meanwhile reze just wants to be normal this go around and kishibe won’t force her to be on active duty i think he’d be merciful #but STILL keep a close eye on her bc she’s a dangerous asset so yoshida doubles as an eventual genuine friend/ally to denji and - #a handler ready to deal w reze at any moments notice at their high school #i’m getting ahead of myself idc im astounded fucking next month this feels like a joke #chainsaw man part 2 spoilers #csm spoilers #chainsaw man #meklit.txt

[penisliker-moved]

we havent even hsd that many rooms recently but today and yesterday ive been lagging sm andnit makes me feel like a bad person

#whixh is so dumbb bc its only like..by 30 minutes. but im like Well i deserve tk burn in hell.fkr this #thats 30 kinutes i couldve been like. at home yk.. #hopefully i pickit up tmrw.. i think today it ws bc i found a new video essay channel thag covers rly jnteresting tooics so i ws invested #so #i need t start #whattvthebfuck since when can i do that. what #i can like. before i stat a tag i can oress enter snd go down thats fuckingncrazy whatttt. look #t #hats crazy. anyways #i need t start preparing my uhmm. videks to listen to ahead of time.. i rly wish i could find a digital upload of th series of unfortunate #events audiobook i like sobssss.th first 2 are on yt but none of the resr i dont think #and ik i could just listen ro a different version bc they Have djfferent versions on yt #but :(( #idk #ig.i cn pray that i dont have t go in tmrwww. maybe therell be too few rooms smiles. i doubt it. but smiles #if she does th thing where shes like Omg too few rooms yiu dont havta come in ^-^ but you have to come in tmrw instead 😈im just gonna say #that i cant JDNFNF. ik thats reasonable of her i get kt but naurrrrr #idk.. lets all lrayy i surpose. #Lso today she didnt have us do deepcleans smiles..hopefullyyyy she keeps not making us do them #bc i hate deepcleaning..well notso much now #basicslly i thot it ws 30min for a normal room.40 for a deep clean #but apparently its an ENTIRE hour for a deepclean #HUGEEE if true. i ws rushing myself rly bsdly and doing a shit job in my deepclean rooms tbh #so knowing that i ummm actually have an extra 30 minutes unstead of an extra 10.. super helpful

[tiixij]

i will change my major and go "this is it. this is the one im going to complete" then after one semester go "hmm.. what if i changed my major..."

#[spongebob arms out image or whatever] THIS ONES NOT A BIG CHANGE THOUGH #also #im just contemplating it. going from science education to like. biology. #MAYBE biology/physics double major bc i really love both of those areas and i hate picking between them but idk well see #anyways i dont really want to do like high school level education i want college level + make a free online thing with like lectures and #tests and stuff. and i want to like. do graduate school because i looove learning and also i have specific interests that undergrad doesnt #typically get too in depth with.. and i could get some teaching experience with like. being a ta. like the labs are run by #graduate school tas so.. idk just thinking. contemplating. #having some possibilities lined up and thought out #i love planning ahead and never following through btw except this time im following through im serious i promise #thank youu pell grant for giving me money to be a complete fool with #anyways. how the hell does anyone pick a major at 18 and stick with it

[gyahyahyahayhahayahyahyahyahyaha]

mayber i can finish this first frame before the year ends hopefully

#its like 5ish days? given the pace im going at that might not be too bad #but i wish i could work faster on this. not so i can churn out stuff faster but so i have something... to show for all this time spent on a #single frame loal #i draw slow enough as is loal #ive just been taking an incredibly long time to get a single frame done cuz ive made so many revisions that i ended up just closing the prog #program without saving cuz none of the revisions i thought were worth keeping #aoufouuffffguuuuuuuuuuu its just annoying.b..... but i cant give up or else it will never get done cuz thats what always happens. i just #stop working on it cuz i get tired of the lack of progress #and lookin gat the same thing for so long.... uuurururur.r.r.r.rurur.ru.urur.rur.urruru.rurur #i have to get used to this process or come up witha better workflow or whatever the fucign word is #i spent a better portioni of today working on this isngle frame but.... i wouldnt say there was NO progress whatsoever. there is definite p #progress from before. and i know this. but... ururururururr i want to ......... #wait maybe ican skip ahead a few frames and just draw a different part.... ig....

[mukamibabe]

hi friends ❤️

#mun post #i honestly thought about reorganizing this blog but.. thats too much work lol #anyways. bless you all honestly i say this everytime i leave and then reappear but.. i appreciate you guys so much #educate me on anything new with dl if any #and also. go ahead and send in requests maybe?? #i realllly want to write again and yes i could finish some of my drafts + answer other ancient asks but.. theyre ancient #i may or may not be posting a rules thing too but idk #i have a couple of old works that i wrote for my own pleasure and never finished or posted so those might be posted too idk #dont take my word for any of this #also!!!! tell me about your ocs!!! please !!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will get on my knees seriously jdfhjhgd #i still have my current ocs but. i wiped that blog clean #asdfh shameless self promo but: @cordeliasgirlfriend #anyways rip im anxious but ily guys mwah mwah

[bbeelzemon]

frill got me excited about my comic and characters again so.... keep an eye out for potential content on the horizon

#we're moving like later this week and we're hoping to have like. an office room setup #i do my best comic work at my computer tablet vs my galaxy tablet....... im more streamlined there #they were helping me figure out plot stuff earlier too.... ive been wanting to start illustrating it for forever #but my first arc is . pretty weak! imo #so once we get past that hurdle i might.. start drawing... :seeing: #im redrawing the main cast lineup now because what the fuck the last one i did is 2 years old now. what the fuck #anyway main cast get slight redesigns just to keep them up to date with my current art style #im inspired to go back and do crisp lines again too when we get our desktops set up at our new place #again its just.. so much easier to do that style at my computer #little tablet is for sketch style things and computer is for crispy style things. ok #we have a lot of things coming up between now and october so i wanted to have something Productive i can work on in the meantime #bc i dont think getting a new job and immediately taking 3 long weekend type vacations within the first 2 months is a good look #anyway after we get settled im gonna make a new commissions post bc i think i actually feel up for doing REAL comms again #not sketch comms! but the big fancy polished comms again! maybe! we'll see! #feel free to inquire about that ahead of time but heads up it could be a couple weeks b4 i get that going for real

[vibrantlifeboringdeath]

the closer i get to getting somewhere with HRT the more impatient I get, which was fine when the steps i was taking were like, changing my morning routine or wanting different clothes, but now that im relying on waiting for doctors to get back to me/liase with specialists im like 😬😬😬

#look its not THAT bad comparitvely #im very lucky for the initial steps to have been so quick. #but. this is something that is Actively Preventing Me From Living My Actual Life #Like I dont plan that far ahead in my life bc I am. Sometimes Not Convinced I'm going to make it much further #but this is like. The Thing. The thing that keeps me going #a lot of what I *can* bare to risk looking forward to is kind of dependent on this. All the personal steps #and every day I dont hear back about the thing I've chased for feels like it pushes everything back so far #I am tired of having boulders roll back over me every fucking day. #HRT will not fix *everything* but I WILL catch at least One Fucking Break #the sooner I get going the sooner I can stop hearing about how Careful I Need To Be. #the sooner I can Maybe Be Myself. Without being insane. Without being insufferable. Without being Too Much #if I can make *this* weight just a little lighter I can shift everything else around a bit maybe #anyway im fine. im just tired

[mayasdeluca]

Just so you know there's an Ash stan on L Chat accusing you of being an Anti Ash troll

Lol...it's probably the same annoying Ash stan who is everywhere and was in my inbox the second I said something about Ash's style or was posting more about Ali than Ash and they accused me of not liking Ash at all and that I was the troll commenting about Ash not posting Ali on social media just because I pointed out the difference. They're like rabid animals and the second you say the slightest of negative thing about Ash they attack you like they're her spokesperson and need to defend her from the wolves. It's so embarrassing. God forbid you criticize anything she says or does because she can't do anything wrong so obviously we should just keep our mouths shut and who cares if Ali is having a good season because Ash isn't so everything else doesn't matter. It's all about Ash to them and they don't care about Ali but that's okay!!! It just can't be the other way around. Bunch of crazies.

#asks #anon #they were definitely the ones who i first attracted in my inbox #and they ended up leaving because they got all salty i liked ali more lmao #i hope they see this too and accuse me of more things #go ahead you freak...maybe get off the internet and find something better to do than police people's feelings #and protecting someone you don't know #she's not gonna fuck you pal #im so tired of the crazy ash stans everywhere and you can't escape them if you like the wives relationship

[bittwitchy]

the most unfortunate thing about reeves universe being separately contained is that we probably wont get clark which means the majority of bruces fruitiness is gonna be confined to harvey

#now get o/scar i/saac as harvey #the unfortunste thing abt no clark tho si that rob would fucking eat sup/erbat UP #if i trusted anyone ever to do b/atcat and s/uperbat in one universe #and maybe even potentially bring in my ultimate dream of the polycule aka bruceselinaclarklois altogether in a cule #it would be rob #bc he doesnt really gaf abt other ppls choices so hes the prime person to play those relationships #bc hes not capable of being against them so he’ll just go along for the ride #ah. such a shame #still a possibility we could have bruce/harvey/selina tho #which i prefer over bruce/talia/selina #mostly bc i havent trusted any writer w talia in y e a r s tho #but also talias wanted to murder selina too many times and whilst im into that its also like leave selina alone #whereas harvey doesnt even teally want to hurt people it just sort of happens #and he mostly just wanted to be bruces sugar baby so #like harvey is a delicate subject always but he doesnt want to do it usually #and thats the issue #he just wants control and to take advantage of things and get ahead in life and better the world in the ways only men would think help when #doesnt st all bc ofc he does