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#maxx tag
invaderskoodge · 19 hours ago
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i seriously think something is wrong with my body. i have been in chronic pain for years, but this pain is different. my feet, knees, and upper legs are hurting in ways they havent before, and i have blisters on feet and legs get shaky whenever i try to walk. somethings fuckin.. afoot... lol...no but srsly i think i should get checked out. idk how to ask my family to go to the doctor... i dunno how to set taht up i just simply do not go to the doctor. never have been able to afford it. -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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(rebel voice) haha you can skateboard? wow... can you teach me how to grind like that LOL LOL LOL -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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irak sticking out a long and draining-like tongue to eat pollen out of flowers like a fucking madman while crimna watches with fascination and awe (he had given irak the boquet) -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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didnt feel like doing anyone else. maybe later i will do them. i felt like piss and needed what they call a Distraction Coping Skill(tm) so be proud of me for making a good and ‘healthy’ mental choice -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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okay noah’s fences but 5 hours is a light nap, 10 hours is barely an average night of rest, and 12 hours is a good night’s rest. except i sleep during the day so its a day’s rest. any other opinions are wrong, it is not ok to sleep less than 11 hours a day imo -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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i dont want to be alone but trusting people is so hard. and getting along with people is so hard. but i do not wnat to be lonely.. -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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the entire world is just traumatized, hurt people unaware theyve been hurt because their pain is so normalized that they go around inflicting trauma on to others because its “normal” or “how things are,” and then when you speak up about how that was traumatic for you or how that sort of dynamic/situation is Not Okay Or Safe they freak out, calling you sensitive, insulting you, saying youre dramatic, because in order to come to terms with that situation or action or beliefs they carry being abusive or harmful or traumatic, its too much - they cant handle the concept that they were abused, that their abuse is normalized, or that htey too abused others in this process by further normalzing it or carrying it out on others, and thats too much for them. so they just insult you and insist youre broken, and everyhting else is and everyone else is fine. youre “broken” because you see how broken everything else is. and its soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo fucked UP dudes! its fucked up! (do not re/blog) -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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every time i experience physcial pain im like “ok so if i take a painkiller it will aid to my body’s pain but itll also aid to the ‘im becoming resistant to this becuse i always just down pain pills and eventually they wont work as well if at all anymore and hten i will resort to taking more than needed even though you shouldnt’,” and hten i have to decide if i want to ride out the pain or take another and risk it becoming less affective. OR if i should just rile myself up on purpose, get angry and/or excited, get adrenaline going, and then no logner feel pain. but that is something i always do and will eventually destroy my body as well (i think adrenaline long term can wear on blood vessels or something like that i odnt remember) SO. 
aka everything hurts and i am like well! my options for relief are all very destructive! but its all i got! 
i already took a hot bath today didnt do anything for my feet. i can elevate them but it also does nothing.... -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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actually my feet have been hurting for weeks now i wonder what the hell is up. i try googling it but its all stuff that doesnt apply (i dont overexert/exercise often, i dont wear shoes that fit bad, i dont stand or walk for long periods of time, etc) so i have no idea whats been causing it but my fucking god my feet hurt a lot lately. what’s the haps -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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i have blisters on my feet and idk why. did not walk a ton. did not wear shoes that fit badly. did not wear bad socks that rubbed on my feet or caused friction. and yet. blisters. -maxx
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invaderskoodge · a day ago
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hey everybody there’s baby mushrooms spawining in a ring shape around the hydrangeas in my yard. 1) WILL this kill the hydrangeas? im not the one who does lawn work but i am just curious. 2) one day ill be gone and itll be because i left to go to the fae realm and thats how its just gonna have to be -maxx
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invaderskoodge · 2 days ago
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you can imagine what happens if they switch from rebel to sayko. you can imagine the toll, 
-maxx
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invaderskoodge · 2 days ago
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meet me in the middle 
-maxx
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invaderskoodge · 2 days ago
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Beginning of recovery. 
Physically and mentally. 
-maxx
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invaderskoodge · 2 days ago
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drawing him. -maxx
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invaderskoodge · 2 days ago
Favorite scene music? How did you get into scene fashion?
thank u for the ask!
i got in to it when i was really young, around the time/a few years after myspace was made and about a year after mcr's second album released (2005) ! i remember pre-black parade mcr and when that album came out it was incredible. someone i knew at the time introduced me to it, but i had seen some various emo/scene-esque stuff on like, neopets or xanga or other early-to-mid-web places. i remember setting my icon to the one that said "emo" and also put that as one of my interests on the neopets page xD along with tons of glitter graphics, transparent anime/sonic gifs, and "which __ are you?" quiz results on my page. and some ascii of anime characters too.
i really like some of the old rave-core-esque scene music, the ones youd likely find as related videos to nightcore remixes of songs, or stuff by S3RL and similar. i also really like crunkcore, even though i know the music is not good (in terms of that its just basic club beats with gargled screams), but i like it BECAUSE its trash. and mostly nostalgic. i think a lot of birthday massacre and MSI are nostalgic for me too, because i used to load those on my mp3 player and listen to them on bus rides on the way home from school. and of course, some of the songs that are more emo but still popular in scene community too, like MCR or black veil brides or bullet for my valentine.
thanks for the ask, hope ur having a good day! -maxx
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