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ilovelifeandiwanttotalkaboutit · 1 year

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Ryan Tedder Imagine:

🌶️ Honey Pt 2: Ryan Tedder x Reader Insert

Summary: Now that you two have officially done the deed, fear and humiliation falls a bit after. After discussing it, it seems it's time to play a little game. Which one of you will be the first to cave? Enjoy ;)

Warnings: Minors dni or I'll turn you into a goblin, implied age gap (still legal tho babes), inexperienced reader, oral male receiving, heavy teasing, technically period sex (tho I don't describe it during cause no one wants that), mirror female fingering, passionate missionary PIV

Word Count: 10,343

Link to Ryan Tedder Masterlist

My heart still managed to flush even though my body was exhausted. As I crawled to the bedside, taking his hand, I'm surprised when I stood that my knees wobbled out from under me. The sensation stemmed straight from between my thighs, and it almost had me laughing. Well, I smirked a little.

And it definitely had him smirking too.

Ryan caught me and said with a knowing tone, "Everything alright?"

"Shut up," I insisted, making him chuckle.

He walked with me, hand-in-hand to the bathroom. He warned me before turning on the light, but it still had me squinting. Now with the both of us in full light, I glanced at us in the mirror and felt myself blush incredibly. Now that my buzz from my orgasm had died off, I became hyper aware of the slickness between my thighs; all from lube and my own substances. I could see that my hair was still slightly damp and had dried weird in a lot of spots. My neck and breasts had several hickeys on them. Not to mention, my lips were red, puffy, and a little chapped.

I catch Ryan looking at me watching myself in the mirror after he turns on the shower, and he only smirks a little. It's devious.

I made eye contact with him in the reflection and briefly glanced over his body. His perfect chest and stomach, skin tanned and not a single blemish. Arms tattooed in different spots. I was almost annoyed that I managed to not make a single mark on him. Other than his hair sticking up wildly from me touching it and his lips gently puffed from me kissing them, he had no other signs.

"Cat got your tongue?" he smirked at me in the reflection, coming to stand next to me.

"No," I insisted, tilting my jaw up to reveal another hickey I missed observing seconds ago. Spotting it made him almost prouder.

He moved behind me slightly, brushing some of my hair behind my left ear before placing his lips next to it, saying softly, "What's the matter?"

Seeing him interact with me this way in the mirror was stirring something else inside of me, but the buzzing sensation in my legs reminded me that my body was truly tired. His eyes met mine in the mirror as his hands came around my waist, waiting for my answer.

"You've left all these marks on me, and I haven't left a single one on you," I say gently.

He smiled a little, humming before placing a kiss behind my ear, still watching me in the mirror. "That's not really true."

Ryan's fingers slip off my waist and he turns, letting me see his back. My lips part, seeing spots from my fingernails and where they dug into him a few times. I didn't draw blood, but they were still splotched and red.

"Oh," I say, my fingers tentatively reaching out to touch them. Ryan looks at me with the same expression on his face, shaking his head.

"It's alright," he says softly, picking up my fingers with his and bringing them to his lips, placing a chaste kiss on them. "You bruise easily, sweetheart. Take it as a compliment."

I feel my cheeks flush red once more as we both step into the warm shower. He pulled me in with him, fingers tracing my waist as we stepped under the water together. Shower sex hadn't even crossed my mind until now.

He shut his eyes gently as he tilted his head back, wetting his hair. I watched the water trickle down his perfect skin, past his collarbone and down his chest. What the hell did I do to deserve watching this?

He was an absolute treasure to be able to interact with, and now we've made out in his hot tub, in the hallway, had sex, and are now taking a shower together. So again, my thoughts tumbled and dried staring at the beauty of his man who was holding me so dearly to him, touching me sweet and simple as if he hadn't touched me intimately just minutes ago.

My eyes dart away when he's suddenly looking down at me. I turn to look at the shampoo, chewing on my inner cheek. He gently rotated us, stepping out of the stream so I could get a turn. I rewet my hair, my fingers coming up to help get underneath my neck. I feel his hands on me again, gently on my waist, almost slippery. A new sweet scent comes to my nose, and I see he's covered his palms in body soap, beginning to slide and rub it into my skin. We both stood partially out of the water now, and I finally looked up into his eyes.

His slate blue eyes are staring down at me, his lips pushed into his usual focused pout. I put some of the same body wash into my hands. I begin to rub my palms over his arms, slipping and lathering the soap up to his shoulders. As I feel his shoulders underneath my touch, the firmness of them, I get the sudden urge to squeeze them and try to give him a massage. Although, he's making it difficult as his hands slip around the small of my waist and onto my back, pulling me flush against him. My heart leaps as he pressed his lips down to mine, hands rising up my back with the soap.

I kissed him back, feeling the water hitting our shoulders. The kiss was more passionate than needy. It didn't feel like it was going places like our others had been earlier tonight. Although I enjoyed kissing him a lot, I backed away a little, and his grip on me loosened. He gently opened his eyes, looking at me with a slight question.

"Turn around," I whisper.

His hands trailed my waist and he raised an eyebrow, placing one more quick peck on my lips before he let go of me completely. Ryan turned himself around, and I brought my hands back towards his shoulders, smiling to myself with slight relief as he relaxed into my touch. I began to put more pressure on his shoulders with my thumbs, gently digging around and pressing them in the best spots I could.

I see his body relax and he sighs, head beginning to hang a little. He pressed his hand against the wall to steady himself

He straightened his spine and leaned into me. "That feels really nice."

I continued my motions, then pressing down and massaging my fingers across his shoulder blades, making him sigh. Then I gently came down his spine, rubbing my thumbs from the sides of the spine and out. When I reached the middle of his waist, he placed his right hand over mine, then his left over my other. He pulled me towards him, wrapping my arms around him, my hands to his hard chest. I had my chest pressed against his back now, my cheek between his shoulder blades.

He used my hands briefly over his own, rubbing the soap up his chest and across his stomach. I turned my head and placed a kiss over one of the marks I put on him earlier.

Ryan let go of one of my hands and let me loose on one side to turn towards me yet again. He seemed almost annoyed, or angry. Yet, he brought his hands below my jaw and brought my face to his, kissing me deeply.

"God," he spoke between kisses, "you're absolutely intoxicating."

I held my breath as he brought me towards the hot stream, pushing me back into it. Water fell on our faces now for a moment, but our lathered bodies were now being rinsed off. We kissed feverishly, his hands tracing my butt and eventually giving it a squeeze.

As however caught up I am in the moment, I feel something hot and familiar drip out of me, and it makes me furrow my brows with concern. Suddenly, I'm feeling really out of the moment. I know the sensation unfortunately well, and the fear that probably caught in my posture made me pray. Please, tell me what I think happened didn't actually happen.

I take one of my hands off his chest and try to subtly feel myself. I managed it quickly without him noticing and opened my eyes for the first time kissing him. In my peripherals, I see my fingers are crimson.

I broke the kiss and felt so embarrassed. I'm obviously going to have to tell him. It's not something I can hide.

He sees the nervous look in my eye and backs enough away immediately, hands resting on either side of my waist. "What's wrong?. Are you okay?"

"Uh..." I lick my lips, quickly rinsing my fingers off in the shower. He follows my eyes unfortunately and watches pink drizzle down the drain. His eyes gaze back into mine then down my body. I turned my head down and saw a line of blood that dripped down my left leg and was puddling at my feet.

I couldn't help the tears that well in my eyes and my face burned with deep embarrassment. "I'm so sorry. I was worried this was going to happen--"

"Are you alright?" He asks tentatively, then, "You're not..."

"No, no," I say, half dismissively. I covered my face with my hands momentarily before scooting him out of the shower head so I could rinse off my legs. "I'm so sorry; this is so embarrassing--"

"No, it's not," he insists, running a hand through his hair. "I... I should have been actually thinking. I should have known better."

"Some girls bleed after their first time," I mutter. "And of course, I have to be one of them."

"It's not something you should be embarrassed about," he said carefully. "Do you... Do you have supplies or anything? I can find something if you don't."

"Yeah, I do," I nod, quickly rinsing the rest of the soap off my body before scooting past him before any more blood came out of me. I couldn't believe this was actually happening. I wanted to implode. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey, you don't have to apologize," Ryan says steadily, "It is okay."

I was thankful he owned dark gray towels instead of white ones. There was only one, however, so when I took it off the rack, I made a note to bring him his own. I briefly dried my legs before wrapping my body in the towel, face red and almost tears in my eyes.

"I'll be right back," I stutter, walking with my thighs clenched as if it would help. My legs were exhausted and my hips were sore now that I was properly trying to walk around. I quickly made it to the hall closet and grabbed another towel, going back to his room.

I hear the water shut off, and I grit my teeth as I show my face once more. He's peeing out of the shower door, an almost deer-caught-in-the-headlights look to him. I hand him the towel, to which he says thank you, and I'm right back out the door again.

I'm thankful; I brought a couple of pads with me just in case. The hypochondriac in me wondered if the stress of being alone with Ryan would be enough to start my period early. This was a little different, but it was still circumstantial. I dried myself off once I got to my room, shutting the door behind me.

Once I'm dressed in another set of fresh lounge wear, I find myself still almost in tears. Wanting to die of embarrassment, I restrain myself from screaming into one of the pillows on the bed. Now that he wasn't next to me, I felt as if I was thinking for the first time. What the fuck did we do?

I glanced around my room, my phone plugged into the wall. I briefly thought about texting someone, anyone, about what to do, but I didn't move. No one can know what we did. This is just supposed to be between us. This was a secret. This was a secret I would be taking to the grave.

I felt like I was choking. I spot my bottle of water on my bedside table and practically dove for it. I force myself to take calming deep breaths and try to pull myself together.

I flinch when there's a small knock on my door.

Ryan softly calls my name through the door, "I know you probably want to be alone right now, but I just wanted you to know that I've had much worse happen, and this really isn't a big deal. I don't think less of you, or think you're… you know, gross, or anything--"

I open the door and see him on the other side, dressed in a black T-shirt and another pair of sweats as well. In his hands were my folded pair of clothes that he took off of me less than an hour ago. He was looking at me with shy eyes as I took them, thanking him in a whisper.

"Are you alright?" He asks.

I give a small nod, then a bit of a shrug. My clothes feel cold in my hands and my throat feels dry. "I'm just… I'm just thinking. That's all."

He gives a nod of understanding, eyes glancing at the floor before gesturing behind him. "Can we talk about it?"

I toss the folded clothes on the corner of the bed and sweep my usual sweatshirt off the floor. As I follow him back down the hallway and towards the living room, I slip it over my head, the smell of my laundry from home making me feel more calm and comforted.

I settled into an end of the couch, as did he. I sat with my feet tucked in beside me, placing a pillow on top of my knees. I looked at him expectantly, hoping maybe he would start. Surely, he understood what I was so pent up about.

"So," he begins, "Tell me what you're thinking."

I begin to gather my thoughts, trying to sort them. The heaviness in my chest now was suffocating me. "Well," I cleared my throat, "now I'm just... worried, I guess."

"Worried?" he repeated.

I leaned my head against the back of the couch and squeezed my eyes shut. "Well, it's like the same sort of guilty feeling I got outside after we kissed in the hot tub. Sort of the 'what the fuck did we just do?' sort of guilt. Surely, you feel it too."

"Guilty and worried are both two different things," he says softly, "but I understand."

I shook my head and opened my eyes, staring up at the ceiling. "Because I mean, seriously. What the fuck did we just do? How did it fall apart so fast? One second I was holding myself and then it all fell apart... how?"

"What parts of this are making you feel the most guilty?" he clarified, "because maybe we can do something about it? Or at least address them."

The way he phrased the question made me almost a little irritated. I turned my head towards him and couldn't help but ask, "Do you not feel any sort of guilt? None at all?"

"The only thing that's making me regret it is how it's making you feel now," he says honestly. "I don't like that you're feeling this way. Since it can't be undone, I want to help. Well, I want to try and help."

Tears burned in my eyes, but I remained focused to keep them at bay.

"I felt guilty when I first started properly having feelings for you," he admitted quietly, playing with the frayed ends of a pillow. "I obviously didn't want to because of our circumstances. That, and it felt... you know, a little immature."

I nodded, holding my breath momentarily when I wiped away my eyes.

"But what we just did, it made me feel different. Different in a way that I haven't felt in a really long time," he says, "And that's not to say that that outweighs any feelings you have. I'm an idiot for not taking them into account."

"You took them into account the entire time, Ryan, don't say that like this is all your fault," I say softly. "You consistently asked me throughout the whole experience if I was alright and if I wanted to go through with it. I did."

"Yeah, but..." he gave a small sigh, "I shouldn't have even started this. I really shouldn't have. I'm sorry."

"Well, imagine what would have happened if you hadn't done anything," I say, thinking out loud. "We'd both probably be in bed right about now, tossing and turning over pent up feelings."

"We'd both be?"

I blinked slowly and turned my head towards him. My anxiety was now swimming through the roof. My cheeks turned pink. He'd already admitted to having feelings for me, but I never said anything about me for him.

I stood and started pacing towards the kitchen, still tears burning in my eyes.

"Where are you going?" he watched me.

"Making hot chocolate," I say, taking out a large liquid measuring up. "Want one?"

He gets up from the couch, "No, I'll make myself a tea."

"Okay," I murmured, taking the milk from the fridge.

We both individually began making our beverages, silence falling between us. He turned on the kettle and leaned against the counter, watching me pour a cup and a half of milk into the measuring cup and set it in the microwave for a few minutes. As I found the sugar and the cocoa, I avoided his gaze, feeling him looking at me. I gave the small shake of my head as a tear fell down my cheek. As I turned away, I wiped it, but it quickly got replaced.

My name falls from his lips in a slight coo, just making me feel that much worse.

My fingers were shaking now, and I forced myself to take a deep breath. I felt Ryan come closer, his hands falling on my upper arms. I sighed and dropped the tablespoon measure into the cocoa. He turned me in his arms and pulled me closer to him. My damp eyes made contact with his shoulder and I slipped my arms around his waist. I managed to hold back a sob.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

He made a small disproving noise, holding one hand flat against my back which the other cradled my head. I took a deep breath, my nose pressed against his shirt. He smelled clean and fresh and comforting, but all the same, it still made me want to cry.

"I feel like such an idiot," I sniffed, backing away enough to wipe away my tears. He let go of me, but remained close, his thumb tracing my cheek as another tear fell.

"I... I never thought I would ever put myself in this position," I mutter, taking another few deep breaths. I couldn't stand to look him in the eye, especially when I felt like I was admitting the world away. "I didn't think about how it would make me feel. I didn't care. I'm so... I'm so frustrated with myself."

He still didn't speak, letting me go on.

"Just..." I squeezed my eyes shut, almost wishing to be home. "What happens now? We still have another four days here-- we didn't even last three days without something happening. What's supposed to be next?"

"I think," Ryan paused, choosing his next words carefully. "We both knew this wasn't going to last forever, right? This isn't... We aren't going to be permanent. We can't make anything out of this."

I began nodding, feeling my heart tear in half, but knowing it was the truth. "Yes, I know."

"Then," his fingers lingered on my arms, "I say, for right now, we don't need to worry about it. We just... continue on. We'll write that song and focus back on having a good time like before. Then after the trip... I don't know, we can figure it out. We can talk about it anytime."

His words calmed me a lot, and I finally looked up at him. He had a serious expression on his face, eyebrows furrowed and lips gently pursed.

"Okay," I whisper, wiping the rest of my tears away. He was right. I really didn't have to worry. This was our choice, and we were going to make it what we will.

I took yet another deep breath, "Thank you."

He then smiled softly, lifting my chin with his finger a little. When I thought he was going to kiss my lips, he instead placed the kiss on my forehead. My eyes had drifted shut for a second, my chest swirling again with excitement. Damn him for making me feel this way. He sighed a little, running his hands only once more down my arms before backing away.

"We'll figure it out," he whispered.

The aroma of his soap began to disappear as he drifted away from me, back to the other side of the kitchen counter where he continued to lean. I found my body wavering after his touch, stumbling the littlest bit to catch myself.

My eyes drift to the floor. I'm still frustrated. Although, now it's less with myself and more with what just happened. It was stupid that I wanted him to kiss me still. All the sweet touches, even having him stand right against me felt like something. Anything.

Then, I hear him begin to laugh.

I peer at him annoyed, "What?"

He had his mouth covered with his fingers, slumping over for a moment when he tried to catch his laughter. He had shrugged and tried to assume the normal posture, but failed to do so without a grin.

"What?!" I ask again.

"Nothing!" He claims, still smirking to himself as he glanced over at me, "You're just like a touch starved little puppy, that's all."

As I flatten my lips into a line, knowing it was damn true, he began to laugh again. Then, I found myself giggling a little too. My eyes were still damp with the old tears, but I felt a lot better. I chuckled and wiped my eyes, looking at him finding amusement in me.

"Be nice," I said. I didn't really feel that bad since I knew it was true. "I know it's pathetic."

"It's not pathetic," He calmed down some, crossing his arms and looking at me, still smiling, "I think it's sweet."

"Great," I nod, beginning to be sarcastic, "You think it's sweet to be touch starved and pathetic. That's cool, I guess."

"I said it's not pathetic," he turned towards me, placing one hand on the counter. The stance made my breath hitch for a moment. Looking at his fingertips on the counter then letting my gaze travel up his arm. It was stupid how it made my heartbeat faster. Then, I make eye contact with him. I think nothing of it until I notice the side of his mouth turn upwards.

I feel a little embarrassed that I'd been so obvious.

"You're cute checking me out, you know?" He says a little louder, making any smile I had hidden that much more apparent. My cheeks burned heavily and I forced my eyes back to the floor.

"I'll tell you what?" he starts. "If there's anything else you want to do while we're here for the next four days, then I want you to be in charge of them."

I thought about it for a moment, then tilted my head, "Be in charge of them?"

"Take charge," he says with a slight determined nod, "If there's something you want from me, get it. Say it. Do it."

I began to feel excited over his words, but also very anxious. "You want me to make all the first moves?"

He nodded. "I'm not going to make a single move first. I understand your thoughts a little better now, sweetheart. I know you have the confidence to do something if you wanted to."

I didn't really like the idea of every move from here on being my call. He had a lot of faith in me. As long as I'd known myself, I let myself believe that I had the confidence of a piece of seaweed.

"So... you're not gonna kiss me or anything unless I do it first?" I ask tentatively.

He began to smile. "Essentially, yeah."

I pry my brain for any move that I could try to do that wouldn't end with me dying in embarrassment. Maybe if I said something crazy enough, I wouldn't have to pull any glamorous first move at all. My mind began spinning with a mischievous new idea.

"Does the first move have to be physical?" I questioned slyly.

He seemed curious. "How can the first move not be physical?"

"For example," I got myself off the edge of the counter and began coming towards him. I waited until I was only a few steps away. He straightened himself up, and I saw a fierce playfulness in his eyes as he let me strut until I'm nearly chest to chest with him. His hands remained on the counter behind him, but his body leaned towards me a little. Very quickly I realized, maybe I had more confidence than I thought because the next words out of my mouth were some of the dirtiest I'd ever said. "What if I told you that I want you to take off all my clothes and turn me around and fuck me right against this kitchen counter?"

I saw his breath hitch and he licked his lips, looking down at me. The tension between us now was killer. I watched his eyes darken, searching mine.

"Or if I told you to take a seat on the couch and that you weren't allowed to touch me as I rode you?" I added, images coming to mind of literally any situation. What I was saying was clearly bugging him as he shifted and swallowed hard. "Or, what if I told you I wanted you to screw me in front of a mirror so I could watch you do it to me?"

He seemed to be breathing very deeply. Ryan's eyes stared down into mine, almost as a warning as I was playing a very, very dangerous game. Our lips were so close. His eyes were half lidded, his breath fanning across my lips, them parting as I let myself get so close to him.

I found myself smirking deviously at him as I backed away. I watched his eyes widen and he leaned forward to follow me, stopping at a few inches. I walked backwards, returning to my original space next to my cocoa. I dropped the seductive tone, speaking normally, but still quietly. "Things like that. What would happen then?"

"What do you mean?" His voice was lower and quieter than it was before.

I propped myself up on the counter, continuing to make my cocoa mix as the milk I put in the microwave finished heating a little while ago. "I'm just saying, I can insinuate things all I want, and if we're playing by your rules, you can't do them to me unless I kiss or touch you first."

There was a hit of silence, then a small chuckle from him. I turned my head, expressing a knowing look. In the light coming in from the living room, I can see his cheeks are bright pink and I spot another obvious problem poking from his sweatpants.

"Problem?" I asked, being an ass on purpose.

His eyes flashed by mine, the amusement slowly fading away. "What if I told you this isn't how we are going to play?"

I still measure out my cocoa, my heart secretly racing but praying my face doesn't show it. My plan might work wonders after all. "And... what do you mean?"

"We've been here for only three days, and I'm sure you would just love to rub it in that I can't handle myself around you," he says in a lower tone, his fingers barely grazing the counter as he begins walking towards me. I watch him out of the corner of my eye, coming closer and closer. "So... you know how long I can last," he says, making my fingers go numb and I set the cocoa back down beside me. He was now standing in front of me, trapping my body between him and the counter with both his hands. The temptation to spread my legs so he could be even closer was almost killing me. "But my question is, sweetheart," he whispered, leaning in close by my ear, making a heat pool between my legs again. "How long can you?"

My lips parted and I watched him as he hovered in front of me. I pressed my thighs together and shifted only a little, but it made him smirk.

"I would love to rip those clothes off you and flip you around, leaving you nothing but the counter to grip onto as I fuck you," he murmured, giving me heavy eye contact. The heat between my legs got worse, and I tried my best to think of other things. "I would love to sit down on that couch in the living room with you on top of me. However, there's no way in hell you're getting me not to touch you."

I swallowed hard, cheeks and neck burning.

"And I would love to fuck you in front of a mirror, you sitting on my lap, legs spread, eyes glazed over as I make you come again and again," he mumbled. I nearly let out a small gasp when his lips accidentally brushed against mine when he spoke. "And the pretty sounds you would make, watching me fuck you with my fingers. Your words begging me for more."

I couldn't help but imagine everything he had said. My heart now was begging me for some relief again. Even though I knew my body was tired from before, I wanted more.

No, I needed more.

He was now enjoying watching me internally struggle. I wanted him so bad, but I didn't want to lose. We both didn't want to lose. We were fighting each other. But what was really going to be lost?

As soon as our lips brushed again, my brain was spinning, but I forced myself to lean back. He still hasn't touched me. My fists were clenched and my legs were shut, but he still stood in front of me, hands on either side of my hips on the counter. He was waiting for me to lose it.

He opened his blue eyes and looked at me with lust.

"Ryan," I finally found my voice.

He whispered back my name, our eyes half lidded in anticipation.

He started slowly leaning towards me again, but I gathered every bit of strength and I had to back away. He looked at me now, patiently, almost as if he knew he was about to win.

The next words out of my mouth were the best I could come up with.

"Your water is done boiling for your tea," I mumble.

He blinks, making the slowest of movements to back away. He falters almost, looking as if he wants to forget about the game and just lean in and kiss me anyway.

Then, he takes a deep inhale, nodding a little bit. He pushes himself off the counter, his presence leaving my vicinity. I finally felt like I could breathe, but I was most definitely still hot and bothered. I felt for a moment that I couldn't unpress my thighs together. I watched him back up, seeing his length even clearer now in his pants. He was struggling just as much, if not more than me.

"Thank you," he manages to say.

When he turns his body, beginning to fix his tea, I slump down. I force myself off the counter, heart absolutely racing. Although I had done the same thing to him, what he just did to me felt like anarchy in comparison.

I wiped some sweat off my upper lip, going over to the microwave and getting my hot milk out. I needed a mug, which was in the cabinet above where he was now busying himself. I slowly came to his side, arms grazing one another as I lifted up on my tiptoes to get a mug. I feel his stance stiffen.

He had his mug in front of him, pouring hot water out of the kettle into it. I put the cocoa mix and sugar into the measuring cup, beginning to whisk it. We were completely silent. I didn't even want the hot chocolate anymore. I was craving something else. My brain couldn't stop thinking about it.

Especially with him beside me, his intoxicating scent. I stirred, longing to feel him and for him to feel me.

The silence between us was absolutely deafening. I could hear my heartbeat in my ears, my breathing feeling like it wasn't mine. My legs stung and I chewed hard on my inner cheek. Holy shit, I really wanted him bad.

I find myself looking at his hands, watching him open the box of tea and grab a bag. I observed the tendons move in his arm as his fingers opened the small packet. When he dropped the little tea bag into his mug, his hands rested on the counter. I gulped when I suddenly realized I had slowly stopped whisking. Now, he was watching me.

But I couldn't move.

My brain lulled me into a certain state. I wanted to turn my head, lean into him and press my lips on his. I craved something yet again, beyond my control.

I slyly began to raise my gaze up his arm. When I'd reached his face, he was doing the exact same thing. We were indirectly searching for each other. A part of me felt as if it were on fire. He wanted me too. He really wanted me too.

Then, at the same exact moment, our hands came off the counter and on each other. I placed mine on the collar of his shirt, pulling him down to me and he gripped the edges of my sweatshirt, pulling me to his body.

Our lips clashed against one another. The sensation again twisted in my knees and made me weak. Explosions occurred in my chest, being released. We grabbed at each other, having forgotten about our hot beverages as he walked us backwards towards the kitchen island. The next thing I know, his hands come under the backs of my thighs, lifting me upwards and back onto the counter.

As he pressed himself against my heat, I could feel his erection rubbing up against me. I moan into his mouth as his thumb kneads me through my sweatpants. I leaned into his touch, grinding my hips in circles with him. But through the sensation, I remember the women's hygiene products I was wearing and gave a small frown in the kiss, my mind swirling. I wanted him so badly, but knew it wasn't going to be clean.

I forgot all about it.

I got a different idea, scooting myself further forward on the counter as his hands wrapped around me. I take one of my hands down his body, past his chest and his stomach, then down to his groin. He groaned into my mouth when I felt his length, rubbing.

I slid myself further off the counter, him catching me immediately and almost not giving me the room to hit the ground. His hands groped me in ways I wished would never stop.

But I knew if I was going to do what I was going to try to do, my nerves were building, and I would need him to stop touching me like this. I found my way in being dominant. I slipped my tongue from his mouth and tilted his face gently away from me, diving my lips to his neck. I kissed his stubble, working my way underneath his ear and down his neck. I briefly sucked on a spot, the small whimper that passed his lips right next to my ear giving me life as he squeezed my waist. Then, I slightly showed my teeth and gave a small bite. Nothing that would hurt.

He groaned now, his body pressing me harder into the counter. He chuckled and said, "God, I love it when you do that."

I smiled into his skin, still placing kisses and raising my hands underneath his shirt to feel his stomach and waist. His hands were simply wrapped around me, enjoying what I was doing to him. I raised my hands higher on his chest, breaking off the kiss to take off his shirt. He raised his arms and let me do so, and as soon as it was ditched to the ground, my lips were back on his neck, kissing downwards. I left hot open mouth kisses to his chest, past one of his nipples which made a small noise escape his throat, then began down his stomach. I had to press against him to get myself off the counter as I came lower and lower to my knees. When my lips kissed his stomach, I momentarily backed away to look up at him. I gazed at his beautiful eyes through my lashes, my fingers wrapping in the band of the elastic around his sweatpants.

I see him visibly gulp as he reaches down and brushes some of my hair back behind my ear. "Are... Are you sure you want to?"

I lick my lips and nod, only pulling down his sweatpants, leaving me to look at the large print in his underwear. "I'd like to try."

"Okay," he sighed, eyes rolling shut as he felt my breath on him. "Holy shit."

As I observe him, I reach a hand out and begin rubbing him through his underwear, making his hips twitch towards me. I gather an idea and I slow my motions down, and he looked almost painstakingly back down at me, begging me to do more with his eyes.

"Tell me, darling," I cooed, continuing to rub him, the words he said to me earlier forever printed in my mind. "What do you like?"

He smiles suddenly, his other hand running through my hair to take hold of it. "Oh, so this is how this is going to be?"

I smirk, teasing the elastic of his underwear. "Tell me what you like, honey."

I visibly see him twitch when I call him that, making me grin wider. His fingers are massaging my scalp as I continue to rub him. As I gaze up at him, a sigh passes his lips. I'm patiently waiting for him to answer.

"I..." He dampens his lips, "I'll tell you what to do. Just be gentle with your teeth, alright?"

I feel myself salivating, nerves growing but confidence forcing to be built. I began to tug his underwear down, the words imprinted in my mind that drove me almost crazy when he said them to me.

"I'll see what I can do to you," I say in a lower tone, giving him a testing gaze up.

His lips part into a mischievous smile, dark eyes watching me bring his underwear to the floor. I bring more saliva towards the front of my mouth, trying to be strategic and smart about this. I gently took his length around my hand and guided it towards my mouth, giving a testing lick to the tip with my tongue. He mewled to my touch as I opened wider and began to very slightly suck, being careful with my teeth just like he asked me to.

His fingertips pressed onto my scalp, taking fistfuls of my hair and groaning rather loudly. "Fuck."

I took him out of my mouth and began licking down his shaft, placing several kisses as I went, rubbing him with my hand. I gazed up at him, watching with a hint of confidence in seeing that he took a hand off of me to place it on the counter behind me. Ryan was leaning, looking down at me with his eyebrows furrowed. I remember exactly what he looked like when he came earlier that night. I wanted him to look like that again. I wrap my lips around him again, beginning to suck him deeper into my mouth and almost to the back of my throat.

His eyes lazily blinked and looked upward as I saw his chest heave with a moan. His grip on my hair became ever so tighter as he began to guide my head closer to him. His voice was hoarse, "Just like that, beautiful."

I love the praise he gives me, rubbing my hand on the amount I can't fit in my mouth and continuing to suck on him. When I need some air, I pull away and he lets me. I rub the spit I left near his tip further down his length, looking up at his reaction.

I spot his hips twitch and his breath hitches for a moment. He is gazing down at me with his lips parted, and they tilt upwards with a smile as he chuckles, "Fuck, honey, you're going to make me come if you keep looking up at me like that."

I find a smile stretching on my lips as I blink innocently up at him, still rubbing his cock at a more vigorous rate. He twitched into me again, whimpering as he regripped the edge of the counter.

"Good," I purr, placing more hot kisses down his shaft that makes him groan, "I want to see you come for me."

Just when I was about to put him back in my mouth, I screeched instead when his hands were placed on my shoulders and he pulled me to my feet. The noise that escapes me is muffled by his lips. I moan a little when his tongue is in my mouth. It feels so empowering what we're doing. I'm completely clothed and he's completely naked. I felt like for two seconds, I had the upper hand.

I did wonder, however, why he brought me up? My hand traveled to his stiff cock as I was going to continue to rub him, but he twitched and his hand was wrapped around my wrist to stop me.

He breaks away from the kiss, and I open my eyes with perplexity. Had I done something wrong?

"I don't want to come just yet," Ryan says against my lips, taking my breath away as he steps away from me, curling my hand in his.

He was whisking me away out of the kitchen and back down the familiar hallway.

"What are we doing?" I ask, finding my voice slightly graveled.

He begins leading me back to his room, briefly stopping by the hall closet to grab a fresh towel. Needless to say, it made me a little nervous that he was grabbing a towel. But those nerves prickled excitement onto my skin. Were we going to make a mess?

"I can't stop thinking about you and the mirror," he admits, taking us into his room. When he lets go of my hand tenderly, he lays out the towel on the base of the bed, turning swiftly to begin dragging the full length mirror out from the corner of the room. I hadn't even noticed the damn thing, and it made me blush heavily.

"Can we do this?" Ryan comes back towards me, taking my hands in his. Then his fingers trace my jaw as he leans down and presses a kiss to my lips. "I know you're still probably bleeding. That's what the towel is for."

It all clicks for me now.

I press my lips briefly against his as well, pulling up the bottom of my sweatshirt and shirt all in one go. Ryan smiled and bit his bottom lip, taking me by the bare waist backwards towards the bed. As I brought my thumbs into my sweatpants, he stopped me. He took a seat on the towel, hands on my hips to turn me away from him. I was now looking at myself in the mirror, watching his hands on my hips. That same fuzzy feeling I got in the bathroom came back. I was completely soaked and excited again at the possibilities.

"Watch me," he whispers, ever so slowly beginning to pull my sweats down. I observe my naked body as I step out of my sweatpants and underwear. His hands traced up the outsides of my thighs, then wrapped around my hips to pull me back towards him.

His legs were spread, and I could feel his hard length pressing against my back. I gave a small sigh and leaned my head briefly back on his shoulder. I turned my head to try and kiss him, however, he just smirked and one of his hands turned my head back forward.

"Eyes on the mirror, sweetheart," he cooed, placing a hot kiss on my neck. My eyes almost drifted shut, but I watched him. One hand rested flat against my stomach, the other came to my knee, pulling me up and spreading my legs wide open for me to see myself.

I watched his hands all over me, lips attached to my neck and shoulder. I find my first low moan when his right hand begins traveling downward past my mound and his middle and ring finger begin to slowly rub my clit. I reach up behind me and put my hand in his hair, resting my head back more as he rubs me in slow deep circles.

"That's my girl," he purred, the praise making me whine a little. "Such a good girl. Watch yourself come undone for me."

I tug on a section of his hair and I feel his body slightly shift behind mine. His fingers trail down my clit and towards my wetness. As he feels me, he hums into my shoulder, placing hot, open mouthed kisses. Then suddenly, I watch his middle and ring finger dip inside me, making me gasp and shudder. I can see in the mirror that he's rather proud of himself, a smirk tugging on his lips.

I blink so slowly, watching in our reflection as his fingers sink into me. I bring my bottom lip between my teeth, leaning my temple against his own with a fistful of his hair. The sensation was already making me feel so much pleasure. His digits began moving faster, his other hand moving up my stomach over my breast, squeezing. I breathe out a moan, making eye contact with him in the mirror that made me squirm.

"Does that feel so good, honey?" he says quietly, his tone low. My thighs twitch and I can feel an orgasm coming in at the base of my stomach. My core burned for it, and his fingers curled ever so slightly and hit the perfect spot.

I couldn't even say anything, I was so pathetic. I was about to roll my head back onto his shoulder, but then his other hand slipped down my stomach and began to rub my clit at the same time. I let out a whine as my body reacts. Holy shit, it felt so good.

Ryan's lips were on my neck, kissing upward towards my ear. His hot breath in my ear turned me on even more.

"I want to hear those pretty sounds, sweetheart," he spoke into my ear, his voice sending a vibration of feelings down my spine. "Let me hear those pretty sounds as you come."

I grinded my hips into his hand, feeling as if I wasn't able to take much more. Small sounds escaped my lips as I focused on the burning hot sensation splaying across my stomach. This was intense. My eyes flashed in the mirror once more, watching his hands perform their magic. I moaned watching his wonderful fingers dip inside of me and pull back out wet with my juices.

"Oh my God," I say with clenched teeth, rolling my head and arching my back when I can feel it all wash over me.

"There's my girl," Ryan cooed into my ear, coaxing me into my orgasm. I cried out, holding on tightly to his hair and a fistful of the sheets by our thighs as my orgasm rolled over my body. My legs twitched heavily, my whole body shuddering into his touch.

When my orgasm rushed over, he slowed his movements, taking his fingers out of me. I turned immediately, capturing his lips in a messy, desperate kiss. He moaned into my mouth, arms wrapping around me as I moved to straddle him. My fingernails dug into his shoulders and I slipped my tongue into his mouth. I don't know where this domineering side of me was coming from, but he seemed to be enjoying it. One of my hands moved down his chest and past his stomach where I took his cock and started stroking him. He groaned louder, kissing me harder.

Feeling the burning continue between my legs and I know I need more.

I stop stroking him to place my hands on his chest, pushing the both of us back towards the bed. A small sound passed his lips when we landed and his hands fell to my hips. I wanted more than anything to ride him right now. I could do it. I think about moving my legs upward and scooting myself into position, but I break the kiss.

Ryan has bruised lips, his eyes fluttering open and deep breaths passing through his lungs.

"Everything alright?" he whispers out of breath.

My eyes flick towards the bedside table. "You have another condom in there, right?"

He lets out a small breath of relief, a smile forming on his lips. "Yeah."

A certain pressure he put on my hips was to try and move me off, but I kept myself grounded. I push gently down on his chest, placing him back on the mattress. His eyes flash mine, but I lean down and place a kiss on the end of his nose.

"Don't you move," I whisper, staring lovingly into his slate blue eyes.

He’s looking back at me the same way.. His hands come off my hips as he lets me roll off towards the side of the bed. My legs are still a little shaky, but I make it alright. I feel around in the drawer and feel the packet, taking it and ripping it open. I'm eager for him.

As I come back over, I steal a pillow from the top of the bed. I find my feet wandering back towards him, excited, and straddle his thighs, I let myself hover back over him like I was before, taking the pillow in my opposite hand. He takes the condom from my hand, and while he puts it on, I bring that hand reaching around the back of his head. I lift it, remembering the nice gesture he did for me. I prop the pillow under his head, and he makes eye contact as I do so.

There's a small moment between us. I suddenly almost feel a little self conscious. He's looking right at me. He's looking at me like he's never looked at me before.

I find a heavy blush forming on my cheeks as I slip my hand out carefully behind his head, letting him rest fully on the pillow. His hair is soft and clean beneath my touch. My lips part, and my voice is quiet. "Better?"

He's still looking at me, a certain perplexity behind his gaze. His hands were barely on my waist, a feather-like touch as if he hadn't completely destroyed me with those fingers two minutes ago.

"Yeah," he muttered, fingers tracing my temple to brush some of my hair behind my ear. "Thank you."

As his thumb trailed my cheek, I smiled gently at him. I rebalanced myself and my arms, scooting myself up a little. "Are we ready?"

Ryan's lips turn upward as he nods, guiding me down to kiss me. As our lips meet, I can feel a heavy sense of passion. Our pace changed dramatically. Once quick and desperate was now sensual and loving. He touched me so carefully. His lips were tentative and polite, yet still kissing me deeply.

I hovered my hips over his, reaching down to guide him towards my entrance. I was only a little nervous this time, but also really excited. Pressing down onto him was much less painful this time. I still took my careful time making it to connect our hips. He didn't take me or press me down into him to make it faster; he let me take my time. His hand ran down the length of my spine. I pressed my chest to his, our lips continuing to crash at a slow steady pace. Ryan's other hand stayed buried in my hair by the base of my neck, keeping me close to him.

Once I'd begun rolling my hips with his, I could feel my body responding and a sound fell past my lips and into his mouth. I ran my hand down his chest slightly as I rode him, feeling the few chest hairs he had. He gave a small groan into my mouth as I grinded down onto him completely. The hand he was being so cautious with gave my hip an encouraging squeeze.

Just as I began to caress his face, feeling warmth beginning to pool inside me at the sensation, I'm surprised when his arms wrapped themselves around me and he flipped us over. With my legs completely spread, the both of us still connected, he then pushes us over to the same spot and my hair splays on the pillow behind my head. His lips never left mine. Not once.

I feel myself in some pure form of ecstacy. His hands find both of mine and suddenly, they're being held on either side of my head. I moan and my heart flips. His chest is pressed against mine, hips locking with me. I wrap my legs around his waist, helping him hit a deeper angle that sends me into a moaning mess. There's something about this position that is driving me absolutely insane for him. His scent, his taste. The way his fingers were laced with mine, squeezing my hands. The way his lips were locked to my mouth. The way he rocked his hips with mine at a slow and deep pace.

I squeezed his hands back, catching my breath when he broke the kiss. Our breaths mix and we breathe together. My eyes drift open, feeling his hair graze my forehead. Ryan's looking right at me. He's looking at me like I'm the only damn thing in the world. I try to fight off my orgasm, wanting this moment to last. I know he can feel me clench around him, tensing to pull him in. As we are staring into each other's eyes, lips parted and swollen, he slightly increases his thrusts. We both moan out, and I feel my eyes roll back in my head as I try to focus on not orgasming. But it's becoming impossible.

His hands squeezed mine again and he placed another kiss on my lips. "Come with me," he whispers.

And suddenly, I do.

His words toss around in my brain and send me over the edge. I tighten my legs around him, squeezing his hands as I moan out his name. He grunts and his thrusts grow sloppy. I watch as that same intensity of his eyebrows returns. I watch him grit his teeth, a shaky groan escaping them. A sound reverberated out of my throat and my body continued to converge around him. I'm completely trembling, but with him holding me like this, it didn’t matter.

His thrusts slow down, and we're both breathing hard.

His motions come to a gradual stop, and he leans down and places his glistening forehead against mine. One of his hands unlaces from my fingers, running down my forearm before placing itself on my jaw. His thumb was tracing my cheek as he looked into my eyes. With my hand finally free, I let my fingertips graze his strong arm. He hovered closer to me and placed an endearing kiss on my lips.

The mood had totally changed in the atmosphere of the room.

He gently broke the kiss and got up a little, enough for me to press my leg against my own body so he could lie beside me. And that's exactly what he did. I let myself curl into his arms as we caught our breaths.

My mind swirled and spun. That was absolutely incredible.

"Are you okay?" he mumbled, brushing some of my strands over my shoulder. His touch almost made my eyes drift shut.

"More than," I responded in the same fashion, turning my head to smile at him almost lazily. "You?"

"Yeah," he whispers, the same sort of smile on his face. His hand raises and caresses my hair, my cheek. "Yeah, I'm great."

My eyes gently shut for a moment, feeling his touch. I tilt my head towards his warm skin, giving a small contentful sigh. My hands were curled in towards myself, fingers barely touching the skin of his chest. His palm travels down the side of my head, past my shoulder, my arm. Then, on my waist.

My eyes flutter open and I look right at him. His eyes were already on me, glancing over my face over and over again. I feel an odd massive amount of affection for him. It waved over my body and my heart and mind.

I can feel his thumb moving on my waist, waving circles of fire onto my skin. He leaned over slightly and placed a kiss between my eyebrows.

Ryan then rested his forehead on mine. "How about we wash up real quick and get some sleep, hm?"

I smile and nod, "That sounds perfect."

"Okay," he grins, giving my cheek one more graze with his thumb before he gets up. I follow him, mimicking his movements to pick up my clothing that was discarded around the room. I slipped only my underwear on, holding my sweatpants and shirt in my hand. He begins moving towards his bathroom, and I hover.

"I'm going to go to the one in the hall," I announced quietly, making him turn.

"Alright," He gives me a solid nod, his eyes dancing over my face. "Hurry back."

I feel almost relieved. So he wanted me to come back. I let out a chuckle and said, "Of course."

"And while you're out there," he says, making me pause in my step towards the exit, "mind grabbing my clothes from the kitchen?"

I feel my cheeks heat up. "Yeah, sure."

"Thank you," he beams at me, taking a few more steps into his bathroom.

I let out a small breath, doing what felt like a more exciting version of the walk of shame to the bathroom. I cleaned myself up, observing the old and some of the new marks on my neck with a smile. He was right, this was really, really fun.

After brushing my teeth, I decided to be bold and keep my sweats off, but my shirt was on. I tossed them onto my bed as I walked out to the kitchen to get his clothes. I found his shirt first that I mindlessly tossed away, then his sweats and underwear lumped together on the floor. I felt proud of myself for trying what I did. And it seemed as if I did it well for him.

I shyly paced back into the bedroom, finding him by the bedside, peeling the covers that we messed up twice back up to the top. The mirror was back in its respected corner and the towel was gone. I can also see in the dark that he was wearing a new pair of underwear. I set his clothes on top of the dresser and came around to the other side of the bed.

We both slipped into the sheets and he made the move of coming to the middle of the mattress and reaching out for me. I let myself scoot towards his chest as I laid a head in the crook of his shoulder. His skin is warm, and I sigh, feeling relaxed and unstressed.

His arms wrap around me and he lets out a little sigh too. "You're beautiful."

I tilt my head up to look at him. My fingers are curled on his chest, and I smile a little as I feel the stretch of slightly hairy skin with the backs of my fingers. I lean up the little way left and place a tired but chaste kiss on his lips. I can feel his lips turn upwards as I pull away from the kiss. I rest my head back down on his shoulder, still gazing up at him like a thousand suns.

"Thank you..." I whisper, "Thank you for everything tonight."

He's smiling down at me, eyes glistening with happiness, but also exhaustion. "No need to thank me, sweetheart. Thank you."

I chuckle, curling into him more. It wasn't much longer before I couldn't help but close my eyes. It wasn’t much longer before we both couldn’t help but close our eyes and drift off into deep sleep.

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