Too Sweet
A/N: Hi friends. I haven't written anything in a while, as I've been tussling with my mental health and raging SAD from the weather near me. Please accept this Mandalorian drabble? Rambling? Takes place between the end of season two and Din's appearance in the Book of Boba Fett.
Tags: The Mandalorian, Mandalorian x Reader, Din Djarin x Reader, Mandalorian x F!Reader, Apostate!Din
WARNINGS: None
Summary: You've been a safe place for Din Djarin for years. He comes to you at his most vulnerable, but always has to leave before you're ready. Title inspired by the Hozier song of the same name.
Word count: 1.6k+
Hours later, you’re still in shock.
Din Djarin is in bed next to you, sans helmet.
It wasn’t unusual for him to be in your home- hell, it would be more unusual for him not to be there between jobs. Your Mandalorian had spent years visiting, hovering somewhere in between a lover and a partner. He shows up in the afternoon one day, and is gone early in the morning before you wake. When he returns, beaten and bruised, you chastise him for leaving without saying goodbye. The routine was comfortable. Familiar.
Except every other time he had been there, you had never seen his face.
It feels like a dance each time he comes. You tend to his wounds quickly but gently, lathering cuts and bruises in bacta before wrapping bandages or slings where necessary to let the medication heal. Once you’ve played nurse, Din secludes himself to your study to eat dinner. And each time, without fail, he leads you to the bedroom to extinguish the fireplace and blow out your candles. His hands find your body, and he ravishes you in the darkness.
Key word being darkness.
Today was the same song and dance. He’d limped into your cabin without greeting, shaking snow from his armored body and settling himself into a kitchen chair while you fussed. A tube of bacta and half a roll of bandages later, he silently trudged away to eat in the study. There was a distinct lack of little green child with him today, which was a major concern after the past year. You suspected it had something to do with the oppressive sense of sorrow following him through the house. So you carried on with your usual routine, asking little to no questions. It wasn’t until he’d crowded you up against the sink, bowl still in your grip as you rinsed it, that he spoke.
“Mesh’la.”
Strong arms wrapped themselves around your waist, and you leaned back into an unarmored chest. In hindsight, you chastised yourself for not noticing the words lacked the electrical buzz of a vocoder.
“Din.” You returned.
He only grunts, right hand gliding up your side. It grips your shoulder, and presses until you turn to face him, bowl still gripped in your damp fingers.
“You know, words are- Din!”
The porcelain bowl shattered as it collided with the kitchen floor. You’d dropped it out of pure instinct, hands flying up to cover your eyes. As much as you’d tried to forget what you saw, it was burned into your brain. Wavy hair, long nose with a scar crossing the bridge of it. Big, brown eyes that couldn’t possibly belong to someone so stern and ruthless. It flashes across your mind, and you almost tear up at the thought of Din breaking his Creed after all these years.
But he’d pulled your hands away and explained - while your eyes are still pinched closed- that he was an apostate. The Child was returned to his own people, but at the cost of Din’s Creed. It had taken minutes of coaxing and reassurance, but you’d opened your eyes and cursed the universe for being so cruel as to hide such a face. From the set of his brow to the nervous biting of his lip, you basked in seeing so much bare skin. It took less time for him to attach his lips to yours and lead you out of the kitchen.
He’d taken you to bed, and now here you sit.
Your room isn’t anything special. Quaint and cozy if nothing else, with two small windows that face out over the mountain’s edge. A fireplace flickers opposite the bed, its warmth trickling out to the sheets and heating your toes. Two bookshelves border either side of your headboard, with a nightstand tucked on Din’s side of the bed. On it, the usually extinguished candles burn bright.
The firelight flickers against Din’s tan skin, highlighting each bead of sweat and curled tendril of hair where it sticks to his forehead. He’s naked, back propped against the headboard and covered in a maroon sheet from the waist down. You’ve donned a short silk robe, black and bordered with laces where it plunges between your breasts. You lay between his legs above the sheets, head on his chest. One of his large hands caresses your scalp and trails to the ends of your hair. The other hand is occupied by a half-full glass of old Corellian whiskey.
You trace a line of yellow bruises on his hip where they extend below the sheet on his lap.
“What happened to you?”
His chest rumbles. “I fought an Imperial Moff. And Imperial battle droids.”
Your eyes widen, and you sit up. Din’s hand leaves your hair to grasp at your waist, pulling you to face him.
“Stars, Din.” You reach out to touch a patch of black and blue skin over his collarbone. “No wonder you’re so beat up. I’ll get you some more bacta before we go to sleep.”
He lifts your fingers from his collarbone to his mouth, kissing each fingertip. “You’re too good to me, cyar’ika.”
“You deserve it.” Is your instant reply.
If there was anything you knew about Din, it was that he never quite comprehended the good he brought to the world.
The Mandalorian brings the whiskey to his lips and takes a swig. You opt to push an errant curl behind his ear.
“I’m not a good man,” Your name falls off his tongue like honey. “Spent my whole life as kyramud.”
You tilt your head at the Mando’a. He’d called you some pet names for years- mesh’la, cyar’ika. But this… kyramud was new. Without his helmet, hearing anything out of his mouth was like a drug. But Mando’a warmed you to the core, building off Din’s comfort and fondness when he spoke the ancient tongue. You yearned to know more.
“Teach me Mando’a.” You kiss him gently, tasting the whiskey where it lingers on his lips. “So I can tell you why you deserve every bit of kindness.”
Din adjusts your legs so you’re sitting square between his, rear end on the bed and legs straddling his waist. He props you up with the ridiculous amount of pillows lying around.
“I’ll teach you anything you want.” Din strokes your knee. “Where do I start?”
You chew on your bottom lip. “What am I to you?”
“Ner cyare.” He pauses, debating. The whiskey makes another appearance, and you’re distracted by his Adam's apple bobbing deliciously in the column of his throat. “Naysol uj par ni. Each day I see you is aay’han.”
“What does that mean?”
Din tilts your chin up. “My beloved. Too sweet for me.”
You blush. “What about the end? Ay-hen?”
“Aay’han. Mourning and joy. At the same time.” He finishes the whiskey. “I mourn when I leave you here.”
Much to your annoyance, tears prick your eyes at the reminder that when you closed them, he would be gone before you woke. “Don’t remind me. Please.”
Din leans forward to capture your lips with his. The sensation only serves to make the stinging behind your eyes worse, and a single tear drips down your cheek. He’s quick to kiss it away, large hand curling into your hair. You climb all the way into his lap, suddenly desperate for closeness. His skin is hot and damp, and you’ve never felt anything better.
“Ni ceta. I never meant to hurt you.”
You sniffle against his neck. “Just promise me you’ll say goodbye from now on.”
He wets two fingers with his tongue and extinguishes the candles before cradling you in strong arms. Two words are murmured into your hair, quiet but sound.
“I promise.”
You grip him tighter than ever, warmth sadly fading as the dread of morning envelopes you.
*
The reflection of daylight off snow-covered ground wakes you.
It bounces in your windows, bathing the room in cool white light. You blink slowly, a heaviness settled on all of your limbs. It’s a familiar soreness that aches from your shoulders to between your legs, dredging up memories of the night before. Din’s bare face, and all the sweet words in Mando’a that he tried to teach you before you remembered he can never stay as long as you’d like. You sigh, letting one of your arms dangle off the edge of the bed. The thought of turning over and seeing the candles, thinking about him blowing them out on each visit was too fresh. It’s easier to lay and stew in your sadness, watching fluffy flakes of snow fall. The clock on your wall reads ‘1457’, another unintentional reminder of your late-night escapades.
You hate to admit that the feeling makes you tear up again. So you lay in bed, curled beneath a thick comforter while the fireplace crackles its last few breaths towards your feet. It’s easier to stare at the snow than it is to close your eyes and think about Din.
“Damn it.” You breathe.
“What are you damning?”
You swear that you stop breathing for a moment. Despite the fact that he had already spoken, you ask aloud, “Din?”
The sounds of bare feet padding across the floor nears, and the Mandalorian appears in your vision. Barefoot and clad only in a pair of loose gray lounge pants that tighten at his ankles. His abdomen is without cover, displaying an array of healing bruises and deep scars. You sit up, letting your feet hang off the bed.
“You’re still here?” You look at the clock again. “At 1500?”
Din smiles, kneeling in front of you. He presses a mug of steaming Caf into your hands and a kiss to your forehead.
“If it’s alright with you… I might be for a while.”
It’s your turn to smile as he smoothes away your bedhead.
“No arguments.” You sip at the warm mug. “I’ll keep taking my Caf in bed, though.”
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Masterlist | Send me ideas
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You may be aware that Satine is the only character to speak mando'a on screen in tcw, but let's get even nerdier! Written mando'a. There's not a lot of background writing and very little that's legible, but there is some. Now first of all for identification purposes, this is the mando'a script:
And this is the aurabesh (galactic standard) script:
Most of the background writing is blurry and tiny, but aurabesh is noticeably blockier, which helps. Here are a few from a single episode, Corruption:
nice car art, satine
is that some sort of periodic table?
I like the detail of the writing on the imported bottle being a different script.
Can't believe I almost forgot the mando'a touchpad.
I also sampled The Academy but I'm about to hit image limit on this post so.
yes this was brought on by me back-clicking out of another jangobi fic that went on an unpromted character-bashing tangent about Satine and mando'a and as you all know I am a petty nerd.
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Mando'a Dialects in- and out-of-universe
Outgame (irl) there are several different versions of Mandoʻa: The Shadows of the Empire Soundtrack version (Notron Cant), the Republic Commando Soundtrack version (Jesse Harlin's text), the Old Republic version (as seen in SWtOR or KotOR), the Republic Commando Novels version (Karen Traviss' version), the Mandoa.org version (their forum members made up a lot of extra vocabulary), several different tumblr versions, and the Disney version (as in the TV-series Star Wars Rebels).
They all have distinctive similarities (the Notron Cant is an exception), but unfortunately, they also all somewhat differ.
Since Karen Traviss published her Mandoʻa version online, complete with a dictionary, the Mandoa.org version and most tumblr versions are based on her version. Her version in turn is vaguely based on Jesse Harlin's version-the first Mandoʻa on file, so to say. I myself see them as different dialects or development stages of the same language.
See, Karen Traviss' Mandoʻa and also most of Mandoa.org's Mandoʻa uses Basic (i.e. English) grammar with a Mandalorian vocabulary, so I call that version Soldiers' Pidgin. It's obviously (ingame) a creole language that came into existence after the Mandalorian diaspora.
It is this Soldiers' Pidgin that Kal Skirata taught his children (the Nulls) and possibly also the language that the Alphas taught other, younger clones (e.g. the CC class or the ARC-troopers) as a "secret" language to hide from the Kaminoans.
If it was used by the clones in such a way, the GAR should have its own dialect.
The different internet versions of Mandoʻa all seem to be based on Karen Traviss' dictionary, so I see them as different dialects of the Soldiers' Pidgin. The same reasoning can be applied to Disney's Mandoʻa.
The language of Vode An, Graʻtua Cuun, Darasuum Kote, etc. on the other hand uses a grammar that differs from Basic. It is an older form of Mandoʻa, probably the Mandoʻa spoken on Mandaʻyaim before the Excision - seven-hundred years ago. It's a lot more interesting (for me, at least). I propose calling it Classic Mandoʻa. It has its own grammar; it has a similar vocabulary as Soldiers' Pidgin, but with distinct and sometimes varying pronunciations (sometimes depending on the rhyme or rhythm of the song); it has a lot of epitaphs and kennings and references and can have very flowery phrasing. It's used, in or around the time of Palpatine's Empire, predominantly in older songs and poems. An irl-equivalent could be Shakespearean English.
We can probably view the (archaic) tOR version as vaguely translated into modern Mandoʻa (Soldiers' Pidgin, probably) since there is exactly no way that the language changes so little in over 3000 years. I also propose that the Basic back then has very few similarities to the Basic that's spoken during the Skywalker Wars.
Missing is a sort of current, modern version of Classic Mandoʻa. I think that is (sadly) very realistic. A society that is so broken up by something like orbital bombardment would likely, over the centuries, develop several different creole versions and try to keep their original language as unchanged as possible, leading to exactly the combination described above.
Here are some other people's thoughts:
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