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perrywrites · 6 months

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yoo, thoughts on bllk boys who'd probably be in a 'die for you' (by the weeknd) coded relationship/situationship? 👁👁

Oh, that's definitely the Itoshi brothers' anthem. From the vibes I'm getting from a cursory lookover at the lyrics (I've heard the song before, just never paid attention to the lyrics before) correct me if I'm wrong about what they mean lmfao. Very much Sae, and also Rin - especially Rin. The emotional constipation and communication issues paired with that kind of intense and desperate love... Yeah, that's definitely Rin.

But let's start off with the 'colder' of the two - Sae. You just know that he's not going to give you enough in the relationship, especially in the start. Honestly, I think in terms of attachment styles (if you don't know about those, look them up and take the quiz! very fun and illuminating experience... lol), he's definitely very much on the avoidant end. He comes off as icy and distant in the start, impassive and bored, and although most of the angst would be dealt with before entering into a relationship with him (hopefully...) that doesn't mean things become that much better when you guys actually become official. Not in the beginning, at least. He's definitely softer, noticeably. He teases you with that trademark dry and sarcastic wit, bestows you with lingering touches, rare and precious smiles, but that's not enough. It's just not enough. At first, you cling to every crumb like a rain-soaked shirt to skin, desperate and lovesick for any ounce of affection, and his acknowledgment of you as his girlfriend sends you soaring. But of course, as a relationship starts progressing, one would want more, and it's no different in this case. Except, trying to ask a stubborn man like him for more is difficult, and eventually, tiring. It makes you feel crazy, trying to beg him for more than the bare minimum he offers. It's not necessarily so much so that he refuses to give you more, but more so that he thinks it's pointless. He doesn't see the point in complimenting you often (that would dilute their worth and effect, he would explain), or telling you that he likes you, I mean, you should know that, right? Otherwise he wouldn't be dating you in the first place. So when you start asking him for affection and for more of his time (to go on dates and whatnot... what? You knew he was a busy guy, stop asking to go out so often especially when you know the amount of precautions he'll have to take) and all of that, he starts feeling annoyed and cornered. You're asking for too much. What, do you want him to change for you? Is what he's giving you not enough? And before long, your need for affection is dismissed as neediness by him, and he declares you to be clingy and suffocating.

And we all know Sae doesn't hold back with his words, he's harsh and cold with what he believes to be true, and although he doesn't think he's being mean he totally IS mean when he coldly dismisses you as clingy and tells you that he wants an independent partner. And when your face crumbles like that, hurt visible now where it had been brewing subtly for weeks, if not months, Sae feels something that makes him feel even worse. Guilt? Yes, guilt. But he genuinely doesn't believe he's at fault for this, for expecting you to not be so dependent on him and expect him to be the kind of lovey dovey person he just isn't. And so when you ask him if he even cares about you, in that kind of pitiful broken voice, on the verge of tears - he snaps. He tells you if what he's doing for you isn't enough, you can leave him anytime and go to someone else. Of course, that's not what he really wants. What he's really hoping for is that you'll realize what you're asking for is stupid and childish, so you'll shut up about all of that and just accept what he's giving you. And you do, you shut up. And you're quieter after that, not as affectionate anymore, withdrawing into yourself. And although he felt relieved in the beginning, soon enough your weird behaviour starts making him antsy. At first, you don't message him that much after that argument, and then soon enough, you're not messaging him first anyways. He's the one starting all of your conversations (and he realizes, then, that until then you had been the one initiating most of the conversations), and although you respond, they get drier and drier with each passing day. And now you're the busy one, and he finds himself doing the chasing - albeit subtly - for your affection and attention. He finds himself doing the exact things you were asking for back then, but it's like you're completely unaffected by it, numb to it, and he realizes with a kind of late desperation that he's losing you. And he doesn't want that - but at the same time, he doesn't know what to do anymore. I mean, isn't he doing what you asked for then? He's doing that, so what else can he do? He can't be vulnerable, so he doesn't know how to ask - beg - you to stay when he can feel you slipping through his fingers. And it kills him, to watch you grow cold towards him like this, as all he can do is seem impassive to it when he is anything but.

After all, don't you know? He might not know how to tell you that he loves you, but he would die for you. So don't just leave him like this.

Now, Rin... He's an interesting case, and he's definitely more attuned with his emotions (uhm... in a slightly twisted kind of way...) and more capable of being vulnerable than his brother (ISTJ!Sae VS INTJ!Rin). So he's definitely more introspective and willing to communicate, and if you tell him you need something/want more, he's willing to accommodate you (saying that like he wouldn't like giving you the affection you want, because he loves every part of it - although he would never admit that. Fucking embarrassing as shit) and listen to your feedback, honestly. He's even fine with a certain extent of behaviour that is very clearly and outrightly clingy or needy (in fact, considering Rin's abandonment issues and loneliness, it would soothe a large part of him even if he's a bit troubled by it in the beginning, in contrast to Sae where it would make him largely uncomfortable - at least at first. The way the two would approach affection they're not used to is very fascinating especially with the whole younger and older sibling difference - Rin wouldn't know how to react at first, but he would definitely love and crave it, since he did receive it in his childhood from Sae. Sae would probably feel more uncomfortable with it, and I feel like he's more of a giver anyways, even if he's not doing a whole lotta giving in the sense that you would want him to 💀💀💀). That's until it interferes with his soccer, though. Although I believe Rin is the type of person who would pick his partner over soccer any day if he had to, that would come after a bit of dating/a while of him being in love with you tbh. But anyways, getting back on topic.

This happy too-good-to-be situation can only work so long as you're communicative as well, though. Because as honest as Rin tends to be, blushing and glaring at you as he calls you an idiot comes more naturally to him than 'I love you's. So if you want something and you're unable to tell him, things are going to go sour quick. He's not a mind reader, so as much as he's able to pick up on your moods and so on, he doesn't know what's going on in your mind. So if you want more affection, want him to hug you and kiss you more, express his love for you more, want to go on more dates, tell him. If you don't he's not going to know that. And although he's constantly trying on his own, scheduling movie nights, inviting you out to places he thinks you'd like, holding your hand in public because that's about the only kind of PDA he's comfortable with, if you need something more, you need to tell him. If you feel lonely sometimes because he doesn't respond to you much on days with practice, that his responses end up being more dry on those days, that you want to see him more often, then tell him. Otherwise, things are going to start crumbling. Good for you, though, because Itoshi Rin is not the kind of man that goes down without a fight. If he notices you're not telling him something, as much as he'll be annoyed at that, he'll push that aside in favour of trying to get you to open up to him - after all, don't you know? How soft he is for you? He might not be all that delicate about it, but he'll try to probe and get you to communicate with him - and although he seems relatively calm and collected, you don't understand how anxious he feels, how scared he is that everything could fall apart like this. Don't you know? He'd die for you, if he had to. So stop it, don't put him through this, please. You're crying now, and it feels like his heart is being ripped apart, and all he can do is hold you gently, like you're so fragile, like what the two of you have is so fragile, and run his fingers through your hair as he calms you down. It's okay, it's going to be okay. You two can work this out - no, will, work this out. Because this has to work out, and he's not giving up without a fight. He's in your corner, he's your pillar, don't you know that? So just tell him what's wrong already, dammit. And when you open up to him about all of your worries and insecurities, that you're scared you're a burden to him and his career, or that you're a bother to him, or whatever trash you're spewing, all he does is hoarsely call you an idiot and hug you even tighter. He assures you how untrue all of your insecurities are, but he knows that's not enough, so he promises to do whatever he can to prove to you how wrong your own mind is. After all, you're unbearably precious to him. He's already so attached to you, it's too late. Whatever you need, he'll give it to you, so please, just don't leave him.

Honorary mentions; post-wildcard Kunigami, and Barou.

Post-wildcard Kunigami definitely has intimacy issues, and he'll be closed off and mentally retreat inside, making him distant in your relationship (even though he loves you so much).

Barou would be similar to Sae here, except he'd be a lot more gruff and blunt about it, although tbh if it's something he's not necessarily against (like PDA - no way in hell are you convincing him to do PDA unless you're, like, to the point of engaged or something, and even then only a little bit) you could convince him if you can make him see your point.

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shower-phantom-ideas · 7 months

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Another DPXDC post for the first time

Yall remember winged danny? Yea me too the good ol days lads

But imagine Danny in Gothem cause hes either on the run from his family or the GIW you decide boys on the run and probably alone.

He gets picked up by the Waynes at some point and eventually he goes to have the “im not normal talk” but they all know. He is a meta or something. They have been waiting for him to be ready to tell them, if ever. They would accept him no matter what.

Except the time comes and he just “I have wings” and like everyone is shocked™️ Danny gets the idea hes about to be rejected and starts to fold in on himself and someone better snap out of it before the kid cries. Alfred is the one to speak first probably.

Just everyone so shocked but I mean it’s more a shock that they missed this instead of that Danny has wings. After that they fully accept him and apologise. Someone says the “we thought you were about to tell us about your powers!” Danny just has his own little moment before shouting “YOU GUYS KNOW I HAVE GHOST POWERS!?!?!!!?”

Anyway they move on and Danny hardly brings the wings up again but he does get seen around with them every once in a while. But eventually they find out hes not taking care of them as he should. It’s probably Duke who sees Danny with his messy wings and offers to help him.

Let Danny get help with self care ok. The Bats would all go nuts learning how to take care of Danny if he ever asks.

Now imagine the reverse of this and they all know he has wings but not that hes the High Ghost King Phantom.

#danny phantom #dp x dc #dpxdc #winged!danny #idk what the au was called tbh I wasn’t jn the phandom much in my high school years #I just wanna see them helping danny preen on #like hes a teen he aint takin care of himself at all and yall now it #he probably gets captured in a cage at some point and the whole bat clan in on a rampage #till they find Danny and hes gone ghost and best the baddies up #that or hes all chains and angsty and hurt and traumatised because this is why he hid his wings #I like that one better cause hurt the child #hahahaha danny becomes cagey after this for a while xD see u get it cause hes jn a cage lol #me and the joker would get along so well but would also be trying ti kill one another out of winning #wanna know how I got these scars? I was tryin to show that joker how a real man gets a scar #anyway I gotta get ready for bed cause it’s 644am lmao

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obihoe · 2 months

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naruto in that waterfall scene truly was like. the villagers have shunned me all my life and now they love me but its all fake cuz they just love me for what i have done to protect the village i HATE those fuckers, they can shove their autograph requests up their dumb asses and then he is like. well i got the solution. to solve all this hatred. to dissolve it and cure it. i'll just keep trying to become who they want me to be, if i manage to be the person THEY want me to be, they will love me and i'll keep their approval. this is the solution to all my problems ^_^ and then he like, hugs his dark self and it dissolves and the whole thing is done its like sfdfdgdgfs. okay, way to repress ur own feelings and do the exact same thing that youve already Been doing all ur life so far LOL. literally victim-blaming ur own self for what others have put u thru but alright. 👍

#naruto #posts #takes that are news to literally nobody here but yeah ..#its like 'i just have to be strong and be positive ^_^ just like that killer bee guy'#which like yeah cool that killer bee kept his cool all this time and just remained chipper but still.#its not his and neither naruto's fault that he was hated and ostracized all this time. lol #it shouldnt be Their responsibility to just be cool with it. and/or make it better #ANYWAY. this is all obvious but yeah #i also do have to say i kind of like the way killer bee's story of how he grew up was presented. nevertheless #cuz he's just like yo yo yo check out these cool rhymes 😎😎 while everyone throws like tomatoes at him or smth. asfsfdgds #like he just cannot be bothered #even when motoi his friend opens up to him abt hsving tried to murder him (which is like huh?? okay. youre scared #of the eight tails so youre just gonna ATTACK his jinchuuriki? w a silly little kunai as well like okay???)#anyway but his friend tells him he secretly hated him and wanted him gone and he's like whatever man 😎 give me ur fist #we are best bros forever like sfsdsfsfs #its kinda cool i think. like u COULD maybe frame this as 'ppl are going to treat u however they choose but if u just stick to urself #and know who u are. u have worth independent of them. believe in ur own strength cuz youre FUCKING cool and youre YOU #nobody can take that away from u. even if they throw eggs at u' or smth then that would be great!!#but no its framed more as 'well u just have to keep being nice and take it and believe that u can become better #so that they will love u' ... which is :[ like naruto bbygirl fuck those villagers .. u are worthy no matter what they say #ANYWAY. lol #killer bee

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thatone-highlighter · 7 months

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I wonder if fionna and cake in the upcoming episodes is going to follow up on the fact that Simon, Fionna and Cake are all directly responsible for at least one death in every universe they visited. Like not even as an unintended consequence but directly responsible for at least one per universe.

In the original Ooo both Fionna and Cake assault a lot of people and kill at least that hot dog knight

Farmworld Finn died to the Scarab trying to protect them

Fionna out right killed all those candy people as well as Winter King accidentally

They removed baby finn from the babyworld and left him with no one left alive to care for him in a world populated by vampires

Martin died joining fionna in her attempt to help people to fight her guilt

BMO dies as the last remaining life form besides the lich because they try to charge Prismo‘s remote for them

And after each and every time this happens, they just up and leave the universe and move on to the next as if nothing happened. All of them, even Simon, treat all these other universes like they’re fake and don’t matter as much as their original universes. They dont care what happens to any of these places because theyre not sticking around long enough to see the consequences of their actions. But there are consequences. in some cases they have irreparably altered the universes from what they were before Simon, Fionna and Cake came through them. That hot dog knight is dead now. Farmworld Finn‘s kids don‘t have a parent anymore. Wether you argue removing the Winter King is a net positive or not they also killed all those candy people and drastically altered that universes timeline for better or worse. Baby Finn has been at best permanently displaced from his original universe where he would have been safe, or at worst dead to the elements or vampires or starvation shortly after the episode cuts. And BMO, the lone survivor in post 2nd apocalypse Ooo, is gone forever, leaving the world inhabited by nothing but the Lich.

#i just keep thinking on this like #i can understand if its skipped over i guess its not super important to what the show is trying to say #and its not like they can DO anything about it now but also #the three of them went through these universes and didnt cate what happened to themn #and now all of these universes and many of the people in them are worse off for it #i guess PB in the Winter King universe is doing better. maybe Gary and Marshall but thats about it #i mean vampire world probably would have gone similar regardless but still #Tree Man Posts #fionna and cake #adventure time #fionna and cake spoilers #fionna campbell #cake the cat #simon petrikov #winter king #farmworld finn #martin mertens #adventure time bmo

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dykedvonte · 23 days

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A Defense of Benny Gecko

Benny is more of a capable leader and person than people give him credit for.

Seeing as no one challenged his position as head Chairmen for 7 years and even then he only loses the position if he’s caught, killed or forced to leave. Yes, it’s also likely House wouldn’t have allowed him to be killed but he sure as hell would of found a way to remove him if he was causing too much unrest within The Tops power structure. Even Swank and Tommy don’t outright dislike him and more so are concerned with his recent secretive and shady behavior, emphasis on recent.

Taking all we know into consideration, Benny likely knew the future direction that he wanted to take Vegas but was so caught up in the plans to acquire Vegas that he didn’t think of how to make his dream a reality. Something he admits to in canon. I see this being used as the main argument that Benny doesn’t know what he’s doing at all but I see it more in the same vein as you can’t really plan something from nothing. The transformation of Vegas is a sensitive thing that he can’t really work on until he has it. The only reason he ran to the Fort prematurely is the Courier who was causing so much of a stir he would’ve likely been found out much faster, making all that planning for nothing if he didn’t take that chance.

Benny is careful (well a lot more careful than he is regularly depicted in fanon), the Courier being able to trace him was dumb luck on their part and his hair being noticed at the Fort is a realistically small oversight that even Caesar is disappointed in because he admits Benny got farther than he should’ve been allowed by his legionaries. The fact he can plan an ambush on the Courier or tries to quickly and concisely clean up lose ends that don’t lead back to him shows he’s not just acting on impulses or in the moment decisions. Or rather he’s quite good at thinking them out, whether they work depends on how you play really. This is all to say it’s 100% believable that Benny could lead an independent Vegas (house was basically setting him up to do that). If he had known explicitly that House was setting him up to replace him, he likely would’ve bought more time by getting in closer, learning more of the system to then flip House’s edge to his favor. Again something he was doing already but likely without the knowledge of House’s feelings on him personally.

No matter what, Vegas’ future was tied to Benny; House’s plans for him, having to get the chip and if he had somehow succeeded. It’s also interesting that of all the people vying for control of the dam/Vegas, Benny’s plans are the only ones actually oriented towards a new future, not a recreation of something long past.

#something something despite going against you Benny has the most in common with an independent player #he’s just like an asshole and also knows when he’s no longer in the driver seat so he leaves it to you #cause despite all his lame traits Benny got supper far in his plan and likely could’ve done it if the courier never got involved #if he didn’t have the need to run to the fort he would’ve waited to learn what the chip did and then made a more direct plan but when a big #clue to what he’s been up to cough the courier cough came he had to throw caution to the wind #this is sorta related to why house chose Benny and his plans for Benny cause likely the rest of house plans were gonna be #about getting Benny to adopt his ideals and views on Vegas before testing whether Benny could run it like him #and would’ve likely been proud of all the planning Benny did for Yes Man if it wasn’t for it being against him #all I can imagine is like Benny being more disappointed than anything with how house decided to run things and he holds nothing personal #towards house this is a necessity as house will never give up control kinda like bingo but I feel like Benny at least respected Bingo #something something bingo could’ve been a father figure making killing him more of a reason Benny would go against house cause he murders #a potential parental figure thinking it’s what he has to do for the betterment of his tribe only to feel like he led them to stagnation and #a longing for days gone by cause the guy who filled ur head with glittery promises ain’t sparkling no more #and makes the resistance to a parental house make more sense #fallout #fallout new vegas #benny gecko #benny fnv

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marshmellowtea · 10 months

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i think one of my favorite dumbass ways people talk about nope is when they treat jupe not being healed from the gordy incident as a plot hole or something like lmao. what kind of support system as a child actor in the notably exploitative hollywood system in the 90’s do you think he had exactly

#this was more something i saw on tv tropes but it was absolutely wild to see this sentiment on there i have to laugh #the way people talk about trauma and mental health NOW is still super stigmatized. what help exactly do you think he was getting #and even when he’s an adult like…..he’s still very much trapped in the system!#he is not in an environment that fosters healing!#and even people who do get help are still like……affected by the trauma they’ve gone through they just get the tools to better manage it #why is the fact he’s still deeply affected by it weird to you gjbgjvfjfdh #that’s not even getting into the fact that he’s specifically a nonwhite man with trauma like c’mooooon be serious here #it would be more surprising if he did get any real sort of healing or closure here #nope 2022 #ricky jupe park #marshy speaks

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dootznbootz · 2 months

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Odypen definitely and equivalently adore each other BUT I weirdly can't see them as the type to actually say "I Love you".

They still definitely vocalize their love for each other but it's more so in "My Joy", and "Extraordinary Woman", "Strange Woman/Man", etc. And very cheesy lines (both say some cheesy shit in the Odyssey, and he definitely does in the Iliad as well. "Joy like a drowning sailor seeing land" bit???)

I could see "I adore you" but even then, that's probably during very specific moments but the actual "I love you"??? I just typed it just now for fic shit and... It weirdly just didn't feel right and I don't know why. 😅

Idk maybe it's kind of because I see them as over the top in ways, they love wordplay and riddles and I think they'd almost think "...That's not good enough >:( " about it??? I don't know???😂

#I wrote this last night. I'll do the asks I got later. don't worry! :D #I am the cheese god remember?😅#I think these two would try to “out-cheese” each other and whoever is left speechless first loses #“I would forget my own name before I would ever forget you” bullshit. CHEESY #And yes. “I sleep in our nest with you or outside on the dirt” stupidity >:D #I plan for Odysseus as a beggar to ask why she waits so long. As he's been gone a longer amount of time than the time they had together #(Simply asking as reassurance. He knows his answer. Calypso asked him. but what about Penelope?) but she gets mad at the #“Beggar” and pities him as he must be telling the truth about having a miserable life if he never got the chance to know such devotion #How what they have could never be sullied by #something as trivial as distance and years. How the years with him were the best in her life. Only made better by their son.#'My dear Joy made songs and poems about love a reality as that was simply the life we shared. Even separated our 'song' will always echo #no matter how long it's been. I'LL make sure it always does. And I know he's doing the same... That strange man used to say that #even if he died his corpse would drag itself back to us before he'd ever give up.'#...I'm not one for 'odyssey zombie au' but when I first heard it yeah. :'D Came up with this back then #“His eyes as hard as flint or horn-” Bullshit! The sad lil fuck is hiding sobs with coughs and telling her to keep away for fear of her #catching whatever “illness” he has. The nice thing about being disguised as old means sickly old man works.#...#I'm noticing that Odysseus has a lot of silly oneliners while I write Penelope with a shit ton of set up :'D #They are so silly and I love them so much #...I wrote a lot :'D #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #my headcanons #odypen #yahoo!!!#sometimes I wonder if I should tag this with more things but I don't want to taint the regular tags with my bullshit :'D I KNOW I'm insane

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deus-and-the-machina · 9 months

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I think an underlooked part of what shaped jin’s mindset was how even back in Torna, he was considered “property”. He and Lora spent their whole lives avoiding the authorities of Torna because they believed would straight up execute Lora to get Jin back, and no one ever denies it. and this has seemingly been a fear since Lora was a child. Jin had to hide his face everywhere he went. Maybe Torna wouldn’t have been cruel enough to execute a child, especially since the king seemed decent(?) enough, if not a bit distant. But the fact it was even a fear at all for Lora since she was so young is just awful to think about.

According to his past self’s journals, Jin and his old driver fought in a war of independence for Torna, perhaps what made him a hero to begin with. and because he’s a war hero for deeds he doesn’t even remember, the kingdom considers him owned by them. Which is on the nose in two different ways ngl. Both in how the Blades are seen and a wider metaphor of soldiers/state. idk it’s just very sad to think about

#I think a lot of people (esp people who dont really interact with the actual story of 2) boil jins motives down to lora too often #like yes her death sent him spiraling but his actual motives dont like. actually have much to do with her directly. it contributed to his #bad mental state that allowed him to get to that point but he still has plenty of reasons to hate how blades are treated and hes right!#its also why 'lora wouldn't have wanted this' doesnt really matter to him. yeah she wouldnt have. she's also been dead for ages so what does #it matter? like hes definitely not coping healthily mans is constantly retraumatizing himself by keeping her body around but like #he knows she's dead hes accepted it so hes doing better than N at least! jin hates being immortal but he stays alive to keep Loras memory #alive. but the longer he lives the more and more awful shit he sees and the more it breaks him. but he cant die bc then the only person left #who really knew lora would be gone (Minoth is alive too but he knew her for like several weeks at most alsfjakfjljfsa) and thats the curse #xenoblade #xenoblade chronicles #jin #siren says

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tswwwit · 1 year

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I would love, even if its just its just brief summaries, to know the different thoughts going through bills head throughout the last smut. (mainly when he got the text and when dipper starts just blurting out thoughts and ideas bc i think those moments would be fun to see)

Imagine you're having the shittiest day at work. You're gritting your teeth and hanging onto it by your fingernails, knowing that eventually dealing with this absolutely idiotic, waffling, overstuffed, condescending dipshit of a client will be done with, you'll charge him out the nose for your services - which will probably be, like a hundred dollars, the way this is going! What bullshit. At least afterwards, you can collapse onto the bed and complain to your spouse about it. Which you have been doing, actually, waiting for a decent excuse to bail or check out early.

Then you get a text. And it's your partner saying they got you a brand new console, your favorite pizza - Oh! And a million bucks in untraceable cash - but you might have to kick your shitty client in the nuts so hard his eyes pop out. Does that sound... okay? No pressure or anything.

The reason Bill was a minute later than expected is because even he needed a moment. It was the sheer whiplash from going from Shit to Fucking Amazing.

#answers #Bill went from full on eeueuughhh about his day to practically having hearts floating around him #Perhaps literally depending on the magic situation in the place he was in #In my head Bill was 'hired' by a (shitty) villain and he got out of it by doing a quick betrayal and demanding to be cast out by the 'heros #“I Got THIS to get back to!! You think I wanna keep him waiting???”#He already hovers in his normal triangle form but this man was practically floating with delight heading back to Dipper #A graph of Bill's mood would start out super low then spike sharply at the pic #It then stays super high up with more spikes during all the shenanigans #After the smut they likely get cleaned up. Cuddle. And talk shit about idiots they've had to deal with #Bill Cipher has gone from doing his evil deeds and playing piano to an empty bedroom while raiding his own bar for distraction #To coming home to someone who'll listen to him bitch about his day and absolutely bicker with him about it #Calling him the worst thing in the universe. A scourge upon reality.#The most clever awful bastard. How *dare* he be handsome that's a crime -and frankly Dipper basically did it for him so he can't take credi #And sometimes even saying 'yeah you didn't *entirely* deserve to be screwed over that way. I could have done that *way* better.'#While Bill rests his head in his lap. Having someone listen to him ramble while he gets his hair played with. Lots of really good kisses #Warm. Close. Grossly domestic. But hey! Even *sex* can seem gross if you phrase it weird and *that's* a normal demonic pleasure #Sometimes fun things are just fuckin' FUN y'know?? Even if this one seems weird to other demons #It's. Nice. REALLY nice.#There's absolute no goddamn way he's going back to NOT having this #Even death won't pry it out of his greedy little mitts

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spacedlexi · 11 months

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sooo glad we live in the universe where twdgs4 was rewritten to be about saving the school instead of the original lis2-esque on the road each-episode-is-a-new-location plot. really dodged a bullet there

dont know if it was due to the cuts and collapsing work environment (no budget for all the assets needed) or what but the school plot is just like the perfect setting for her to end her story. and we really almost got a plot about her.... just trying to make it back to her original house? oof

#my biggest problem with lis2 is that being on the road made a lot of your choices essentially meaningless #like wheres the threat of consequence when you know youll be gone by the next episode anyway?#the kids were originally gonna kick them out permanently.......Nightmare Scenario #the plot of her trying to get back 'home' is so silly honestly like its Just nostalgia/fan bait. convince me otherwise you cant #it makes no sense....she lived right outside a major city... that place is Not safe anymore #it wasnt even safe when she left it 8 years ago girl why would you go back #her finding a place to MAKE a new home and having to fight for it? with a community of her peers who love and respect her? so much better #shes a community leader now :) of a bunch of kids living secretly in the woods just trying to make a safe home for themselves #in a hostile world that wants them dead #love that for her #shes been managing adults since she was 11 and even before that tried to be a voice of reason. at 8 years old. community leader makes sense #s4 is just so narratively sound to me for clems character that i cant believe there was ever any other direction they wanted to go in #every time im thinking about how good s4 is i remember what it almost was......... and i am so grateful we got what we did #not only do we live in the universe where s4 is about the school but we Also live in the universe where s4 was un-cancelled :) yay #shit makes me so happy man. i remember clem is living happily at ericsons and my day is Immediately improved #these little fictional bitches in my head giving me free serotonin on command #it speaks #twdg

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lloyd-007 · 1 year

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Okay unpopular opinion… spider should have gone with his dad-

#avatar spider #avatar twow #avatar quaritch #spider deserve better #Like come on bro was completely abandon by everyone #Like even his siblings didn’t even try to help like bro #Like does this child hate himself or something bc if l was him I would have gone with my actual father not jake sully 💀#Sorry not sorry I love jake but come on man #miles spider socorro

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milflewis · 2 months

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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it #my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with #and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l #lovely?#bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am #glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone #since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life #he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even #harder now. in others he is easier.#he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken #about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better #my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he #hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his #personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the #nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off #he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he #still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay #long when you call in to see her?#whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael.#not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart #i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him

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kyuala · 6 months

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SOOOOOO hard to go through everyday life trying to ignore the never-ending feeling that im just irreparably fucked up and therefore should just give up on everything

#this aint exactly s******* but it aint exactly not s******* either #anyways it gets even harder when i have to live under the same roof as my brother who is so much better than me in every single conceivable #and imaginable way possible like #and i knowwww a LOT of it comes down to us having relatively similar yet wildly different lives despite being 1.5y apart and having the sam #family our entire lives like he has gone through NOTHING and i mean not a single societal issue ive had to face and endure my entire life #he's a man im a woman. he's white im black. he's straight im gay. he's skinny ive always been 'overweight'. he's always been the good #christian kid ive always had issues w faith and religion. he's never been mentally ill i was clinically depressed for nearly 8yrs of my lif #we both lost the same parent and im the only one who got pathological grief and a personality disorder out of it. he's had a great job for #the last 7yrs that now pays him 20k+ every month ive only had 3 odd jobs my entire life and 2 of those my MOTHER had to give me so i would #have SOMETHING and ive never made over 1.6k monthly n my last job was minimum wage only #he's had like 4 relationships and is nearly engaged im so traumatized + emotionally unavailable ive only ever been on 1 date my entire life #he has a good relationship w every family member we have i have Issues w like half the family. he's always been an active member of our #church i can barely listen to like 4 traditional hymns before i start losing my mind and spiraling. i think the only two ways we're pretty #much equal like socially is that we're both able bodied cis and christians but still the cis and christian thing is debatable for previousl #stated reasons so like. do yall see how much better he is doing than me in every little last area in life and how he's always gotten the #long straw when it comes to Not having to deal w certain obstacles in life. n i know its like yea idk what it actually is like to be him an #he could not be doing all that well first of all shut up. second of all if it was 1 or 2 things i'd get it but it's literally EVERYTHING #and i know bc of said things n our v different lives it's unfair to me to compare the two of us but then it begs the question: WHY #WHY did i have to go through these things. WHY do i have to deal w this. WHY did i get the short straw literally every goddamn time #WHY did i have to get THIS life like WHYYYYY why ME GOD. why have I had to put up w all this bullshit for 24 fucking years!!!!!!!!! im TIRE #and this is not me hating or resenting him i know it's not his fault and he is so good to me #but still. why was i left with these things? to live like this?#so yes i guess i do envy him a little bit. who wouldn't #mari.txt #personal #tw negative #dl #btw i do NOT mean some identities are better than others. i mean he is better and is doing better than me in life partially bc he's never #had to deal w certain social issues and obstacles that come w oppressed identities.

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kateis-cakeis · 2 months

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rewatching bbc merlin really has me like buzzing in my mind with so many thoughts. Like I'm kinda watching it backwards atm going from S5 to S4, I think I will jump around 3, 2, and 1 but just,,,, there is so much especially in S5 that makes me !!!!!!!

Honestly, I feel like this fandom has to give the writers more credit. Like they did a damn good job, and to me, it's such a good tragedy. Especially how S5 plays out, it takes everything and just tears you down, and down, and down. It's perfect, perfect with flaws! But still perfect

#bbc merlin #merlin #yeah idk on that note about the writers - this fandom is way too harsh #like i know we all have ideas on how it should have gone #but i think we lose how it's still a story that they planned from the start to end like that #they did their job they set up from the beginning and it is good as a tragedy imo as someone who has studied tragedies #hot take but the characterisations are consistent - i mean like as consistent as they get for a 5 series show #they did better than most and i dont feel like any characters get like their previous characterisation assassinated #that includes Arthur and Morgana btw they clearly have arcs that work well and where Arthur's is a slower progression - Morgana's is like a #lit match - slow at first but when it gets going it's going and then gone - it's wonderful #i mean look at s5 it literally starts by talking about Arthur's bane aka his fatal flaw aka his hamartia #which is himself and i dont think it's as much as the overdone hubris but rather Arthur's love and trust for others - but that like in many #tragedies can be debated #okay something else that can be debated is the peripeteia - i think a good example of it is the Disir episode because that's when Arthur's #fate becomes sealed anything after that point is fruitless because the Triple Goddess has decided he must die because of his rejection of #the Old Religion - it's a reversal of fortune in a sense that Mordred is alive to play his part in Arthur's death - as Merlin puts it. You #could see it more as Merlin's peripeteia rather than Arthur's but still #if we wanna debate it more Arthur's peripeteia would probablyyyy be when Mordred stabs him because that's when his death becomes imminent #it's a reversal of fortune because he's dying from that point forward rather than a strong king he is a man dying #the anagnorisis is another point to make. You could say for Arthur his anagnorisis is all of the finale - like this constant realisation of #Merlin and his magic and realising all that he missed all that he didnt see and now it's too late because he's dying #I'd say Merlin's anagnorisis comes with the whole Mordred and Kara ordeal and how he realises his mistake and how it's gonna cause the #downfall of not just himself but Arthur too #then catharsis - see i think it's the only part where the tragedy falters because do we get catharsis from Arthur's death and Merlin's #immortality - where he's still at the lake centuries later?#i think in some ways yes and in other ways no because I don't think BBC Merlin is following an Aristotle's tragedy #i think catharsis comes more from Morgana's half of the tragedy - seeing her die - and i think further catharsis comes from knowing it's no #over forever that there will be a second chance for redemption for both Merlin and Arthur #but it is a more difficult one for sure #anyway point is that S5 specifically has a tragedy storyline that is very well done and we should credit that more tbh

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wizardnuke · 3 months

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i am so over today i want to go home. and sleep for a week. fuckin ouch

#still thinking about that stupid fucking dog. oh my GOD bro #i don't feel bad at all like 1) don't let ur dog run around outside unattended 2) i CANNOT express enough that on top of #them allowing that. they live DIRECTLY beside a high school. teenagers drive on that road every day.#and your hazard of a dog apparently tries to dart across roads like a fucking squirrel #obviously i feel bad for the baby but like. dude. that could have gone so badly? for her or for me and my bf?#i now have further evidence that im a good driver that doesn't swerve. but i don't wanna fucking hit ur dog either.#so glad she's okay bc that would have been devastating for her owners and they were VERY sweet to us about it #alls well that ends well she's just a little road rashed because i clipped her at 30mph or so. poor thing got pingponged across the road #which is a million times better than going up and over her but still. auugh baby. don't leave ur fucking dogs unattended outside.#9pm at night.#she was Shockingly okay. like she wasn't limping or acting like she was in pain at all even tho she was scratched up. very happy about that #very spooked! very spooked baby she was not happy but she wasn't hurt. like it wouldn't have been my fault but #i would have felt TERRIBLE about it. like sorry i hit the baby but like NINE IN THE EVENING? OUTSIDE DOG? THAT BOLTS ACROSS ROADS?#also for reference she's a big girl which is good for her. a smaller dog would not have been okay.#but big dog vs small car. come on man

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8rujaa · 7 months

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to anyone dealing with ptsd, has there been anything that has helped relieve some of the symptoms?

#im emotionally stuck due to the constant reliving of what happened #i get these weirdly intense flashbacks where i can remember the how the fabric of the couch looked like up close #and how they felt. and how everything looked. the way the colored lights hit the room a certain way #i think i did myself a disservice by thinking i was soooo in love that i didn’t want to forget any details lmao #now i can remember everything like a photograph and sometimes i find myself back in my old apartment and the fear floods my chest #and i can’t breathe and my stomach starts turning it’s terrible. i really felt like i was in hell #i stopped smoking ouid 3 weeks ago bc whenever these flashbacks would happen the high would make them HD and it would send me into a loop #but now i think weed was the thing keeping me above water… it’s been a rough 3 weeks. but before i start smoking again #i wanted to ask if anyone found something else that made it a little easier #it’s been months since our break up and i really want to move on. i’ve tried to meet other people but i’m terrified of men #and i find myself unable to connect with anyone…#i’ve been physically better which i am so grateful for because being unhealthy was my biggest reason i was so depressed #i’ve been doing therapy but i talk about the same thing with her every week. i’m tired of it #i think i’m still in disbelief that they did that to me. i never thought they’d be capable of hurting someone so badly.#i can’t get over the fact that he r***** me for months while i was disabled and pretended not to know what he was doing was bad #i realized he knew when he tried to make it look like i was crazy. that made me really sad. i think i was hoping he was clueless so #i could still believe he was a good person… or at least the man i fell in love with. i was willing to forgive him once he apologized…#when he tried to make it seem like i was going insane the blindfold came off and i saw him for who he really was #like no wonder i was so scared of u dude… no wonder i kept having panic attacks anytime we were together and i couldn’t sleep next to u #i’ve been afraid to admit that shit broke me as a person. i don’t think i’ll ever be the same. i can’t function.#plus knowing i stayed for her bc i was worried for her and didn’t want her to experience the same thing without someone there bc i realized #how good he was at gaslighting and lying. only to find out she was waiting for an excuse to get rid of me… she wanted me gone…#i went thru all that for nothing…#and i still don’t understand why each time i tried to leave for my own good- to get medical help and support they begged me to stay!!! why #brain vomit

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