#making one every time i saw one would give me hella anxiety

[absentlyabbie]

i'll tell you what converted me to being all-in on keeping cats indoors only:

living for a year and a half in a rural area with a sudden feral cat colony explosion on the property.

i moved in with my folks for a bit and at that time, one (1) stray cat mama had taken up residence on the property, but was too feral to let my mother anywhere near her. but especially after she brought three kittens around, mom fed her and the kittens in hopes they'd grow trusting enough she could catch for spay and neuter at the minimum. momcat stayed mean and hella wary, but the kittens would hang around a little nearer and play with my mom via long stick, but still wouldn't come close enough to touch or catch.

unfortunately, two of the three kittens were girls and started having kittens of their own before further progress was made, shortly after i moved in. and that was pretty much instant doom.

there were so many kittens. SO MANY. multiple litters. every time we turned around, more kittens.

we fed them. we hunted for and located the kittens every time anywhere on the property and would move them to a repurposed doghouse anytime a mama cat had them somewhere else, so that they could grow up human-socialized and we could spay/neuter them when they were old enough. (also it was a handy tactic to push the issue of the mamas getting more used to/trusting of us themselves. only really worked with one of them, though.)

and we watched them die.

we watched litter after litter of kittens never make it to the age they could be spayed or neutered. the moms stayed, for the longest time, too skittish to more than briefly touch, much less catch and crate for a vet visit.

it sounds like a silly joke to say i have kitten-related ptsd, but i absolutely do.

too many goddamn times i'd walk out of the garage and find the carport and gravel drive strewn with tiny bodies. others simply went missing, never to be found.

one in particular, i wish i hadn't found, and the visual literally haunts me still, almost a decade later.

i saw so many kittens die of snake bite, spider bite, wild dogs, birds of prey, hit by cars, respiratory illness, covered in fleas and eyes crusted with infection.

and we loved them all. scrimped for antibiotics if the vet could be convinced to give it to us despite our being unable to bring them in. bought flea collars and ointments. we cared for them and fed them and petted them and played with them, brushed their fur and cleaned up their little faces, put ice in their water in hot summer, rigged a heating lamp in their house in the winter.

and they died. horribly. that property is pocked with unmarked graves of kittens and cats.

all the best intentions, not enough resources, and it didn't matter anyways because the population went from three to almost twenty (at times, over thirty) in the blink of an eye.

they died and died and died. our hearts broke over and over again. the stress and anxiety wore us down like sandpaper. i think, by the end of it all, we managed to find less than 10 of them all homes, including batman the disabled kitten i found a home across the country through tumblr.

it was carnage and tragedy, frankly. and we were helpless.

it only ended because they started dying faster than they could be born, and because we finally caught the two remaining mom cats in traps and got them spayed.

the points about outdoor cats being invasive predators devastating to local wildlife populations is true and valid and important.

but i know cat people, and cat people who don't know better than to let cats outdoors. what matters to you is the cat itself, generally. the cat being happy and taken care of.

keeping cats outdoors, letting them outdoors, is not taking care of the cats. it's not protecting them. it's not giving them any happiness or invigoration that couldn't be provided to them as indoor-only pets with just a little research and effort.

they die. they get ill. they get hurt. they're at risk of predators, and cars, and disease, and carelessly cruel children and deliberately cruel adults. they're at risk of disappearing on you because someone else saw a cat outdoors and intervened to give it a better, safer life not in conflict with the local environment.

and if that offends and angers you that someone would just take a cat they saw roaming outdoors, even collared, and that it sounds like i'm endorsing that, i am, but not if you intervene and be that person yourself for your own cat.

if what matters to you is doing right by your cat because it's family and a living creature whose happiness and health and safety is important to you,

keep them indoors. not part time. always. exclusively.

edit: since apparently i need to clarify this, i'm saying cats should live inside, that they should not live outdoors, even part time. visiting the outdoors supervised on a leash or in an enclosed catio is not the same as even part-time living outside, and i am certainly not advocating against it.

#long post #cats #indoor cats #outdoor cats #keep your cats inside

[compact-turtle]

How would Atticus be like with a Mexican reader?? I just wanna call him, “mi amor, guapito, hermoso, mi corazón” !!! All the cute names. Teaching him Spanish, how to dance, cook, and usual customs.

It would be super cute just him asking what does the name ur calling him by mean and u say some lovey dovey shit. Also the fact that we kiss on the cheek for greetings. *gasps* or how he is pretty isolated so he’s either gonna have to get comefortable with random family pulling up or reader giving him an ARMY of kids. Just so that they don’t get lonely cuz family is hella important!

"Mi amor, where's the salt? I can't find it" You called from the kitchen, "I need it to finish making dinner."

"Reckon I saw it sitting in the spice drawer."

-Atticus strolls into the kitchen. He notices you standing near the counter looking for the salt. Quickly, Atticus rummages through the nearby spice cabinet. Without missing a beat, the salt is located. He slips the salt into your hands.

-You thank him then continue cooking. For a few minutes, Atticus just continues to watch you cook. The smell lingers in his nose and his mouth began to salivate.

-A small sense of curiosity began to bloom inside him. Multiple times, he remembered that you would call him mi armor. He couldn't figure out what it meant. Were you unhappy with him? Is this why you called him that?

"What'd ya call me earlier, Doll? Me a-more?" Atticus asked.

"Its mi amor, Atticus. It just means my love in Spanish."

"Hm."

-Atticus comes up behind you. His arms slither around your waist. Slowly, small kisses are littered all over your face. Your nose, cheek and forehead are all claimed by his lips. Not a single inch is spared.

-You laugh as he buries his face in your neck. His warm breath tickles your neck. As you try to squirm out of his hold, Atticus tightens his arms around your waist.

"Let go now. I haven't finished." You say as you playfully pushed his arms away.

"No."

----

-He would love pet names in a different language. It makes him feel so happy that you thought of him. He'd try to learn Spanish to give you one as well. (Honestly would probably butcher it and give you something that sounds funky. You'd totally have to correct him and teach him what it really means).

-Would eat up telenovelas and get super invested in them. At the end of the day, he would pull you into his lap and you would watch it with him. Theorizes about future plot points and characters with you.

-Struggles to make food with you. He can only cook an omelet, oatmeal and potatoes. However, Atticus really enjoys your cooking. He finished it every time and always asks for more.

-Super lost when it comes to your culture. However, he understands with time. You just have to be patient and explain it to him slowly. Would enjoy participating in it with you. sees himself as special since you took the time to integrate him into your culture.

-----

-At first, he wouldn't like being around someone else's family too much. It gives him anxiety because it reminds him of his own messed up family dynamic with his parents.

Also, having to many people around. He's not used to it. Eventually, he'd come around after repeated exposure. Even grows on the children in the family. Comes to learn that not every family dynamic is abusive or hurtful.

-Would be super nervous to have his own kids. A little afraid that he might turn out like his father BUT knows better. He's a bit strict with them since he wants them to learn discipline. However, reminds them about how much he loves them through his actions. (Ex: taking them on special bonding trips)

-Absolutely adores when you're pregnant. Gives your stomach little kisses and wants to listen to the baby. Tries to cook all your pregnancy cravings (fails but A for effort) Messages your feet and back.

-Refuses sex. He's really afraid it'll hurt the baby somehow. Only does it when you coax him into it. Very gentle and constantly asks for reassurance.

----

#yandere drabble #yandere imagines #male yandere #tw yandere #yandere x reader #yandere oc x reader #yandere headcanons #yandere oc x you #yandere male #yandere x darling #yandere farmer #yandere farmer x reader

[aloesarchives]

How would Cosmo react if his s/o randomly started to mess/braid his hair out of a habit (let's say s/o has anxiety and doing Cosmos hair helped them calm down)

Oh my god, this has been sitting in my inbox for almost 2 years! I'm so sorry to the anon who requested this!

A/N: I know it's been a while since I've been back on this blog. I've been busy with college and my personal life that I had to stop writing here to focus more on them. Unfortunately, because of that, I've sorta lost that hype I had for Kengan that I had back a few years. I still love the series but I have other interests I want to write more for. I'm thinking about making a multi-fandom x reader blog to do my other works on because this blog kinda just became a Kengan-only blog and I think it's better to keep it that way. I'll still post some headcanons and stories on here every now and then. But for now, Kengan will take a backseat when it comes to my focus because I want to post other headcanons and writings for other fandoms. Thank you all for the support you have given me by enjoying what I write!

I honestly believe Cosmo would be thrown off by s/o when they start braiding his hair or messing with it.

But because he is such a sunshine boy, he wouldn't mind it after the third time and probably encourages them to continue what they are doing with his hair.

Since Cosmo started growing out his hair more, his s/o started to braid it more often because it is high-key looks better on him than his bowl haircut.

Cosmo honestly likes it when his s/o braids his hair because when he does it, the braid is a little messy and some of his hair starts to poke out so he ends up having to do it again later.

When his s/o tells him one of the reasons why they started braiding his hair, he is not bothered by it at all. In fact, he is okay with it if it means it helps calms his s/o's nerves.

Imagine it: Cosmo sitting in the dojo doing some stretches before he starts his training for the day. His s/o is on the side of the mats fidgeting with their hands. This doesn't go unnoticed by him and motions s/o to come over. S/o's face lights up and comes over behind him and starts braiding his hair. Once they are done, Cosmo says thank you and either gives them a hug or even a kiss on the cheek if that's okay. Then he's off to train while s/o is sitting on the mat feeling all warm, fuzzy, and giggly.

High-key asks his s/o to braid his hair because s/o does it better and faster.

Depending on s/o, Cosmo will have hair accessories in his braided hair. S/o might add a ribbon or tinsel added to it, maybe some beads if they want to and Cosmo is not complaining. He probably vibing with his hair because s/o just made it better.

When Cosmo cuts his long hair when he started entering into more serious tournaments, let me just say that s/o was absolutely devastated when they saw him go back to his original haircut. S/o obviously understands that long hair can put him at a disadvantage in his fights. But they can't help but miss it because it looked so good on Cosmo then his previous haircut.

Since he cut his hair short again, his s/o obviously can't braid it but instead they ruffle and play with his hair to fill the void that is the loss of braiding Cosmo's hair.

S/o gives nice head massages and would do this to Cosmo before his matches to clear his mind and after so he can relax and calm himself down.

Cosmo doesn't mind his hair being ruffled, he just plays along with s/o. But Cosmo likes it when s/o slicks his hair back to have that classic look he gets when he does it during a fight.

Ngl, Cosmo's slick back hair look he does in Ashura is hella cute and handsome. My handsome boy.

But either way, Cosmo just lets s/o do whatever they want with his hair since it gives s/o peace and calms their nerves. He's just happy to know that he can help out s/o in any way that he can.

But don't worry, he'll most likely grow his hair back out again after there are fewer major tournaments going on so his s/o can go back and do his hair again.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you for taking the time to read it and I hope you have a wonderful day!

Much love,

~Aloe

#kengan ashura #kengan omega #x reader #imai cosmo #imai cosmo × reader #kengan ashura headcanons #kengan ashura x reader

[benignbucky]

Whiplash Pt. 2

Based on THIS REQUEST

PART ONE

AN: (MINORS DNI) This is probably gonna be the final part, I'm not super feeling this series anymore in all honesty so I'm gonna leave it as a mini series so we can get that resolution. I may come back to it later but for now I am happy with this ending. This could honestly be a standalone but the first part is linked above. Thank you for being so patient with me while I got this out, last weekend was stressful but this weekend is so much better. You may need a fan for the last half of this. ♡

PAIRING: stucky x reader, john walker x reader briefly

Word Count: 2.4k

WARNINGS: John Walker is the ex because absolutely no one likes him and we all know this man radiates tiny pp energy and would be the worst in bed, fighting, minor angst, mostly fluff and smut, unprotected sex (wrap your wang before you bang), threesome, overstimulation, squirting, HELLA praise kink, pet names (baby, peach, good girl), brief mentions of dub-con/non-con with ex, unbeta'ed (all mistakes are my own)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The memories of that night were burnt in the back of your eyes. Seeing your ex, John, for the first time in 6 months and he still had so much power over you.

The second you opened the door, tears sprung to your eyes as a barely audible 'w-what are you doing here?' escaped your mouth before he was walking in, clearly not noticing Bucky and Steve walking over with fury in their eyes.

"You need to leave before this gets messy." Steve and Bucky were easily twice his size, not so much in height but in pure muscle.

"Oh, so you're moved out and fucking both of your roommates. A whore like you would do that, huh?" John

You backed behind Bucky as Steve took the lead. "Listen, I don't care who you think you are but you don't just get to come back around after how you treated her. Let alone call her something she most certainly is not seeing as you're the one that cheated on her with how many women?"

"You may look all big but I doubt you even know how to fight. Useless muscle if you ask me." Little did he know that both incredibly skilled in combat, especially hand-to-hand combat. And that's all it took for Bucky to leap forward and land a bone breaking punch to John's jaw, almost knocking him out cold. This had him backing out the door, learning his place.

"And don't even think about coming back here because next time you'll have to be dragged out," The tone of Bucky's voice was firm and aggressive but only until John walked out of the building before he joined Steve in comforting you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been three hours since John tried to pry himself into your life again. You were still trembling even though you were in the arms of the two people you trusted most. The idea that John could just show up again out of nowhere terrified you more than anything. You were well protected by Steve and Bucky but just having John in the same room, no, same building as you brought on heart shattering fear and anxiety.

You had all migrated to your room, the three of you barely fitting on your queen size mattress. It really showed off how much bigger they were compared to other guys, especially compared to you. Both of them were easily at least a foot taller than you. Their biceps easily closer to the size of one of your thighs than your arms.

Around you, they were gentle giants. That was until they needed to protect you. And they would, with their whole being. They just wanted to show you how much they valued you, how much you lit up their lives. They wanted you to know that it wasn't one sided. The two of them were pampering you in kisses and praise, gentle caresses, doing everything they could to make you feel safe and loved.

Eventually your breathing and heart rate had calmed, turning on your back so you could look at the two men. Their overwhelming appreciation towards you made you want to show your appreciation for them but you were mustering up the courage. You hadn't been intimate with anyone, let alone with yourself since before you moved in. Any experience with John had been too rough, basically forced from you but you didn't know any better.

This one moment with Bucky and Steve, everything felt different. They asked if they could play with your hair, caress your face in their hands, or even to soothingly rub your back. Every touch required you to tell them yes. If it made you even the slightest bit uncomfortable, they would stop and move back to something else you had already agreed to, which only made your core dampen more than it already was.

Fighting the nerves, you kissed them both with nothing but love and passion, hinting for something more. It took them a minute to take the hint but when they did, their actions only got softer.

"Are you sure? You don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with." Steve whispered. His and Bucky's eyes had darkened, pupils blown out. This only made you want them more.

You nodded at them both even though you knew they wanted a verbal answer. You gulp before mustering up a soft, "Yes, I want this. Want you. Both of you."

Slowly, you sat up, starting to tug at the hem of your oversized shirt before you felt one metal and one flesh hand move your hands away, removing your shirt for you.

"This is about you, peach. Don't worry about us. We want you to feel good." Bucky whispered in your ear, sending chills down your spine but in the best way possible.

Steve was behind you, rubbing circles into your back as Bucky trailed kissed down your jaw and neck. You leaned back against Steve's chest as Bucky's kisses went lower to your chest. "Can we take this off?" Looping his flesh fingers under the strap of your bra.

"Please…" You breathed out your answer, feeling Steve's hand loop under you to unclasp the article of clothing. You gasped at the cold sensation of Bucky's metal hand brushing over your hot skin and he chuckled softly. "You're so fucking beautiful, you know that? Isn't she, Steve?" You leaned back once more only to gasp again at the light flick that Bucky gave to your nipple. "Absolutely gorgeous." Steve hummed his answer, you could feel his length growing underneath you.

The moment you felt Bucky's mouth over your chest left your mouth agape, your back arching at his touch. His mouth didn't linger long as it started moving lower and lower until he was in between your thighs, kissing over your biker shorts but not over where you wanted him the most.

Out of instinct, you reach down to pull off your remaining clothing but Bucky just shakes his head and replaces your hands with his. This time it's him gasping at how absolutely dripping you are. "Oh you poor baby, probably haven't had someone focused on your pleasure in so long."

Steve's hands moved up to tease your chest, massaging and caressing everything he could reach before pulling his shirt off with you still on top of him. Bucky did the same before placing your thighs over his shoulders, looking for any sign of you being uncomfortable but only saw your eyes shut in pleasure.

Dipping his head down, he licked a broad stripe up your dripping cunt, not even giving you time to be shocked as he got to work. Your sounds were only making him work harder as you took his hands in yours at your side.

John only went down on you once and that was after begging him because it was 'only fair' seeing as you had always done it for him. Steve and Bucky didn't even ask, didn't want you to because unlike John, they cared more about your pleasure than their own.

"Such a good girl," Steve mumbled in your ear before leaving open mouthed kisses on your neck. This only fueled your needs.

"More, Bucky. Please…" You had let go of one of his metal hand only to tangle your fingers in his hair, pushing him even further into your core. He was groaning against you at your neediness, which sent vibrations throughout your entire body.

You were about to beg again but before the words could even come out, you felt two cold fingers at your entrance before they slowly slid in and bumping into your g-spot, which wasn't something you had ever experienced before.

"B-Bucky… oh my god! What was that?" You were a blubbering mess at this new found sensation.

Looking up at you and only moving his mouth away to say, "You can't tell me no one has ever?-" His fingers were curling up at an agonizing pace, your hips bucking on his hand was the only response he needed before he started moving at a faster pace. You were almost at your peak, legs trembling, as he put his mouth back on you and sucked your bundle of nerves into his mouth.

You had never felt this much pleasure before in your life. Only a few more strokes of his hand left and you felt like you had exploded, seeing stars. The sounds you were making and your grip on Bucky's hair had him groaning against you, only heightening your peak and making it more intense. Bucky wasn't done yet though, he was going to drag out your high until you couldn't take anymore, Steve nearly forgotten behind you.

Any words you tried to make were incoherent as Bucky finally slowed down and kissed back up your body. "Such a good girl for us, aren't you, baby?" Chuckling at how you could only nod as a response. The two men would have been happy with at that but you were already sitting up and turning around to give Steve attention, which took them both by surprise.

You were a shy person in general let alone during a situation like this but your orgasm only gave you more confidence. Bucky laid down as you crawled up and straddled Steve. As much as he would love to watch you ride him, you were spent. You looked it to. With a swift motion, you were back on your back, legs spread again as Steve pulled down his pants and his briefs, Bucky following behind shortly.

You knew both of them were packing at the one too many times you had walked in on one of them getting out of the shower so you weren't that surprised to see how big they were in the moment. "I would love to taste you but I can't wait any longer, needa be inside you. Is that alright?" Steve accepted your whimper of a yes and draped his body over yours, giving you a tender kiss before reaching down and running a finger in between your folds and lining himself up to your entrance.

He didn't even need to look up at you for approval, you were already snaking your legs around his hips. "Eager girl, aren't you?" Steve smirked before pressing into you slowly, earning a soft moan from you before rocking his hips slowly as you got used to his size before working up to a faster pace. Both of you moaning and groaning as you raked your nails down his back.

"Fuck, so tight. Don't know how long 'm gonna last." You were already squeezing around, trying to milk him for everything he had.

"F-faster… harder…" You begged and he happily obliged. You didn't care if he didn't last much longer, you knew Bucky wanted a turn and you wanted to give them both a chance at you. "Oh my god, Steve. I'm gonna cum… please." Your begging only made Steve's release come sooner, only letting go when you had reached your peak as well, pulling at his hair as he groaned into your neck before his thrusts slowed to a halt.

You were still catching your breath before the two men swapped places. "Think you can handle one more, peach?" Bucky hovered over, looking for any sign of you wanting to stop. "I sure hope so." You chuckled out of breath still before gasping as Bucky flipped you over onto your stomach and pulling your hips up to meet his, his hands resting at your hips.

"That's a good girl," lining himself up, Bucky groaned at the wetness that was Steve's release mixed with yours as he pushed in. Steve was longer but Bucky was noticeably thicker as he pushed into you. "You weren't kidding, Steve. So. Fucking. Tight." Bucky growled out. Steve reached over to moved your hair out of your face before Bucky started thrusting into you.

"If it's too much, just say and we'll stop and take care of you." Steve reassured you before nodding to Bucky, encouraging him to pick up the pace.

And he did, his thrusts were relentless but were all for your pleasure. Neither of you would last very long but he wanted this one to be the best orgasm of the night. "Steve," Bucky managed, nodding his head to Steve, motioning for him to touch you. The whine you let out when Steve scooted down to rub feverish circles around your clit which was only bringing your third incredibly intense orgasm of the night only moments away.

"Oh god… of fuck fuck FUCK…" amongst another string of curses cam out of both you and Bucky's mouth as you came, covering Bucky's thighs, Steve's hand, and your comforter. It only took that sight and a couple more thrusts as Bucky was filling you to the brim. "Fuck…." He groaned, "Can't say I've ever had that happen before."

You drop to lay flat on your stomach on the bed, clearly oblivious to you squirting all over the two men and your blanket, only humming in response. "Did you know that you could do that, baby? Did you know you could squirt?" Your eyes widened at Steve as he asked, he took that answer as an obvious 'no' and chuckled softly.

You wished you could move but you were so fucked out that your limbs were limp. Steve got up and grabbed a new t-shirt and underwear for you to put on as Bucky eased out of you, causing another whine from you at the sensation. Steve left the room temporarily just to get a warm washcloth and a different blanket for the three of you as the other one was deemed in need of a wash.

The two cleaned and dressed you before laying out the new blanket over you. Bucky laid down first, pulling you to lay on his chest before Steve crawled behind you, spooning you. You were barely conscious but you heard the small I love you's and praises from them about how good you did. You breathed out a small 'love you too' before falling asleep.

#♡benignbucky♡ #stucky #stucky smut #stucky blurb #stucky fanfic #stucky x y/n #stucky x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes blurb #bucky barnes x reader #bucky imagine #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes #bucky x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky barnes headcanon #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers #steve rogers smut #steve rogers angst

[ijwrff]

If you are taking requests, May I have a Yandere Anti fic? Maybe one where the reader is hella shy and a big history nerd(like myself 👉👈)and they like rocks,sticks,and are basically Goblin brained? Thank you 👉👈

I can’t remember if this was before or after I opened requests so I wrote it anyways XD hope you enjoy! 

You were anxious. You always got anxious meeting new people, but you knew you had to meet him. Anti. He was the last septic you had to meet. You’ve even met Angus at this point. 

You’d been friends with Jackie first, after he helped you when someone tried to steal your wallet. He saved you, and you were grateful for him. Since then, you’ve met the rest of his family. All but Anti. 

He was rarely home, always busy doing something. The others have warned you he can be...difficult to get along with. Which only served to make you more anxious about your meeting. 

Jackie pulled you out of your thoughts, “It’ll be okay! He’s a softie at heart.” He knew of your anxiety meeting new people, and gradually introduced you to the members of his family. You were anxious to meet all of them, but they all responded well and eased your anxieties. All of them you’ve met have been kind and understanding. 

“He’s an asshole, don’t lie. Lying will only make them more anxious.” Marvin pitched in, and successfully made your anxiety worse. 

“Um...I don’t know if I can do this…” You didn’t want to skip out on meeting Anti, but the septics weren’t helping. 

Jackie put his hand on your shoulder, “It’ll be fine! If he’s mean to you I'll speak up. You don’t have to meet him alone, we’re here for you!” He was ready for you to meet his last brother, even if he could be mean at times. Jackie truly believed he was a good person, but he would admit he could be cruel at times. If he was mean to his friend...he wouldn’t remain quiet. 

Jackie, Marvin, JJ and Robbie were there with you. Angus was away on his latest adventure, and Schneep was working. Chase was out with his kids, or he’d be there with you too. 

JJ seemed almost as anxious as you...apparently they’ve had a lot of fights in the past. He confided in you about them, and it fueled your anxiety. If Anti could get into bad fights with his own family...what if he had fights with you?

Before you could leave the front door opened...and there he stood. Adorned with ripped black jeans and a solid black shirt. His green hair flowed, and you couldn’t help but think...he’s gorgeous. 

You decided to speak first, “did you know turkeys were revered as gods by the mayan people?” Shit...you got nervous and gave a fun history fact instead of introducing yourself again. “Um...sorry. I really like history. I’m y/n.” You held out your hand to shake his, but he didn’t move. 

Awkwardly you pulled your hand back, but he reached out and grabbed it at the last minute. “Anti.” 

“Welcome back!” Jackie pulled him into a hug, and it looked like Anti wanted to be anywhere else in the world. 

“Oh! I got you a gift!” You reached into your pocket and pulled out a shimmering green rock. It was how you showed your love, giving your friends rocks that remind you of them. You thought it would be a good gift to give to Anti. 

He reached out and took the rock. “Thanks.” He kept his responses short and sweet, and the others looked surprised that he even said thank you. Apparently he wasn’t one to do such. 

“I’m going to my room, don’t bother me.” Without another word, Anti left to go to his room. 

“Well…” Jackie started once Anti was gone, “that could have been a lot worse.” 

“Told you he was an ass.” Marvin got up from his chair and walked away. 

“Do you...think he doesn’t like me?” You voiced your worries and Jackie instantly reassured you. 

“He doesn’t like a lot of people, he just needs to get to know you more!” He gave you a smile then went to the kitchen to make lunch for you all. 

JJ smiled at you before walking to his own room, leaving you with Robbie. 

“He...not good about feelings.” You smiled at Robbie, pulling him into a hug. 

“Thanks Robbie.” You knew he was just trying to comfort you. You pulled away from the hug and followed him to the tv so you could play videogames together. 

That was a couple weeks ago. And since then, you’ve given Anti sticks, rocks, and shiny things. It was how you expressed your feelings. And for some reason...Anti hasn’t left again. It seems like whenever you were at the septics house, he was there too. 

You found yourself visiting more often than usual, enjoying the time you got to spend with Anti. Today was different though...he seemed more...on edge. 

“Anti...is something wrong? You seem distant…” You had grown more comfortable with him since visiting more, and you wouldn’t lie...you were developing a crush on the septic. 

“No. Drop it.” That made you even more concerned. 

“Are you sure…? I’m here for you if you want to talk about it.” You just wanted him to know you were someone safe to confide in. 

He grunted and grabbed your arm, pulling you towards his room. 

“Anti...why are we going to your room?” Maybe he wanted to be out of the open to open up. He didn’t confide in his brothers much from what you could see...maybe he didn’t want to talk about it when they could walk in at any moment. 

He opened the door and pulled you inside. It was the first time seeing his room. It reflected him a lot, many dark colors. But what surprised you was all of the items you’ve given him out on display. You honestly didn’t think he’d keep them. But apparently he valued the gifts, enough to display them on his desk. 

“You...stop caring about me. It’s dangerous for you.” He wouldn’t deter you that easily. 

“I can’t. And even if it’s dangerous...i’d like to stay friends.” Even if you secretly wanted more. 

“What if I don’t want to be friends?” The words broke your heart, and he saw the pain on your face, instantly continuing, “I want to be more. But I’ll hurt you. I know I will.” 

“I can handle it. I can make my own decisions.” You looked up at him, determined. 

“Tch...you’re not very good at making decisions then.” He had yet to let go of your arm, and you thought he might just enjoy the contact. 

You reached over and held his hand, “What if I choose you?” 

He grunted, and pulled you over to the bed, laying you down and hovering over you. “You shouldn’t. You have no idea what you’re getting into.” 

“Then tell me...what makes you so dangerous?” 

He didn’t respond, and leaned down, lips connecting with your neck. It made you gasp, and a blush crawled onto your face.

“Anti…” he growled at the word. 

“Don’t say my name like that…I can’t be held responsible for the consequences.” He bit your neck gently, and you almost laughed at how gentle he was being.  

“You have to tell me what makes you so dangerous.” 

“If you were mine...you’d be mine and only mine. I wouldn’t let anyone else look at you. I’d mark you so everyone knows you’re mine.” He bit harder, before sucking on the skin gently, effectively giving you a hickey. 

“What if I want to be yours anyways?” You felt bold for just a moment, and the words came out before you could stop them. 

Anti growled once again and leaned back, taking a good look at your red face before leaning back down and pulling you into a kiss. 

It was passionate, and more gentle than you thought possible. You kissed back with the intent of showing your feelings through it. Still...it made your face red. You were kissing your crush, of course you’d be red in the face. 

“I want you...but if we do this...you can’t be with anyone else. You have to be mine. I don’t even want my brothers around you. I want you to be mine.” 

“Then do it...make me yours.” You leaned up and pulled him into another kiss, this one rougher than before. 

You would be his...forever. He would never let you go. He meant every word. You would be his and only his. 

#antisepticeye x reader #yandere anti x reader #yandere antisepticeye x reader #x reader

[stuckyxren]

Stucky and I / Part 1

Summary: The reader is an enhanced. She doesn’t know where her powers came from, but she knows that Hydra wants her. After an unfortunate Hydra incident, Steve and Bucky come to her rescue. Hella fluff ensues. This is basically a fluffy sickfic of sorts. (Part one of a multipart series)

Warnings: Decriptions of blood, panic attack, vomiting.

Authors note: Please know that I do not have a lot of medical knowledge. I do suffer with anxiety issues. Information may be slightly inaccurate to some, but makes perfect sense to me. Thanks for reading!

————————————————————————————————————————

After finishing my daily workout, I jogged back to my house.

As I approached, I could see that the door was slightly ajar and all the lights were off in the house, which was very odd.

Looking around, I cautiously stepped toward the door, staying low and as quiet as possible. Once I reached the door, I slowly pushed it open to see that the living room had been tossed. The couch was ripped open and turned over, papers were everywhere, tv smashed, and the coffee table turned over with a burned Hydra marking on the bottom. I’ve seen them on tv fighting the Avengers so many times that it’s an easy symbol to recognize.

Slowing my approach and reaching for the baseball bat by the front door, I continued into the house. Walking slowly toward the kitchen, I could see the flickering of the stove light and something smeared on the floor. Upon turning on the light, I see that it’s blood and there is a lot more of it. My breathing gets faster and my legs grow weak knowing that this is too much blood for anyone to survive.

As I start to fall toward the floor, an arm catches me by the chest and a hand covers my mouth to hold my screams in. “Miss, please calm down. I won’t hurt you. My name is Sergeant Bucky Barnes with Shield. We had some intel on Hydra for this residence and we tried to get here as soon as we could.” He said in a calm voice. “If I let go of your mouth, can I trust you to stay quiet? We don’t want them to know we are here.” He asked.

I nodded my consent, still breathing too fast. Bucky let go of my mouth and slowly turned me to face him. As I looked around, I saw Captain America, Black Widow, Hawkeye, and some other shield agents behind Bucky. All of the Avengers, that were at my entrance, and Shield agents were all giving me sympathetic glances while Bucky held me in his arms.

“Hey Buck, get her out of here and in the Quinjet. Start checking her vitals and get her warm before the shock wears off.” Captain America said, seeming to take control of the situation. “The rest of you follow me. Quietly.”

Bucky gave his nod of consent with the rest of the team before looking down at me once more. “Ma’am, may I carry you?” I nodded again before he lifted me in his arms bridal style and maneuvered through the rest of the team toward my door and out to the quinjet. I resigned to laying my face in the crook of Bucky’s neck and clutching to the material of his Tac gear while trying to calm the anxiety attack that was building up, but I think we both knew it wasn’t working.

“Hey. Hey. It’s gonna be alright. I’ve got you. Can you tell me your name?” Bucky asked me in a hushed tone as he started walking up the ramp of the jet.

Shakily, I pulled my face out of his neck and looked at him as I spoke, “My name is Y/N.” I spoke in a hushed tone since I couldn’t seem to get enough air in my lungs.

Bucky gave me a small smile as he put me down on a table. I tried to clutch to him, afraid of letting go, but the super solider slowly peeled my hands away, whisper to me all the while, “Hey, Hey, Hey. Y/N, Doll, I need you to let go. I can’t help you if you are stuck to me. I’m just going right here to get the medical bag and a blanket. Okay?” He asked.

I nodded and let go of the tight grip I had on him. “There you go beautiful. Now, I want you to keep your eyes focused on me. Okay? Focus all of your attention on me and my voice. We will get through this. Together.” Bucky said in a soft, but authoritative tone.

Again, I nodded and watched Bucky, never taking my eyes off of his. He knew where everything was without having to look and soon, he was right back in front of me, wrapping me in the blanket.

Grabbing my hand, Bucky kneeled down to my level and brushed the hair out of my face. “Okay Doll, now I need you to slow down for me. Take some deep breaths and look into my eyes. I’m gonna ask you a few questions and I need you to nod yes or no for me. No talking. Just focusing on your breathing. Can you do that for me love?” He asked ever so gently. I nodded, remembering his request to me.

“Good. Now, were you at home when this happened?” I shook my head no.

“Okay. I’m glad. Now, do you know why Hydra went to your house?” Again, a shake no.

“Okay. That’s fine. Do you know how many people were in the house.” I nodded my head yes and showed Bucky two fingers. He nodded and spoke into his ear piece, “Cap, we have two civilians inside. I repeat, two civilians.”

We never got a reply back so Bucky continued his questioning. “Do you have anxiety normally Y/N?” I nodded my head yes.

“Okay. Do you want me to give you something for it? You don’t seem to be calming down.” I began to shake even harder and frantically shook my head as I pushed back toward the wall. Bucky got up slowly with open hands, and spoke to me in a soft tone, “Hey. Doll. Look at me. I asked because I’m worried about you. I will not give you anything if you don’t want me to. Let’s relax, okay? I promise I won’t hurt you or do anything you don’t want me to.”

With all of Bucky’s reassurances, I slowly scooted back toward him and leaned my head down into my palms, trying to quell the growing nausea from the anxiety attack. Suddenly I started swaying. The feeling of being light headed increased the nausea and I reached for Bucky, who was standing a few feet away from me, quietly watching my every move.

“Woah. Easy there. I got you. Give me a second.” With that, Bucky got back on the com and called for back up, “Um Cap, we have a situation on the jet. I’m gonna need you in here ASAP. We may need to take off sooner than we hoped.” Bucky said in an urgent tone as he rubbed my back while I supported my head on his torso.

I groaned as I felt bile rising in my throat. I pushed it back down and went to try to stand. “Hey. No way. You are way too unsteady. Cap will be here in a moment. He’ll know what to do and I’ll be here the whole time, okay?”

I gripped on tighter and obviously started hurting him. He didn’t say anything, but I could tell he was noting my every move in his head. Seconds later, while my head was resting on Bucky’s torso again, I heard foot steps on the ramp and almost freaked out, but I could tell Bucky knew the person since he was so at ease, so I slightly calmed down.

“Hey Cap. This is Y/N. Would you mind grabbing that for us?” He asked. I didn’t know what it was or what was really going on at this point. “Preparing for the worst. The shock is wearing off and I think we both know what could come next. Do you have any updates?”

At that, I looked up and saw Captain America , mask off, shield on his back, and trash can in hand. There was blood on his gloves and a sad look on his face. My stomach finally gave out, as dread dropped to the bottom of it, and I lunged for the trash can. Cap and Bucky were quick as Bucky grabbed hold of me before I could fall over and Cap had the trash bin under my chin while pushing my hair back to Bucky, who gathered it in his hand.

“Alright Y/N. Get it out. It’s okay. We’ve got you. Your safe. I promise.” Captain America said as he and Bucky kept whispering reassuring words to me as I continued to get sick. Once I was finished, I went to go sit back and went right back into Bucky’s chest. Captain America put the trash down, in reach, before kneeling at my height. Bucky slowly wrapped his arms around me and started attempting to warm me up again. “Y/N, I’m Steve Rogers. I was the team lead for this mission and on my sweep, I’m sorry to say that I found both of your parents dead.”

My eyes welled with tears and I threw my hands up to my mouth as another gag escaped. Knowing that I was empty, the boys put a towel under my mouth as Bucky turned me into him and started rocking me, shushing me, and making promises that we both hoped he could keep since he discovered my abilities. Once the gags stopped, Steve placed an oxygen mask on my face, helped Bucky situate me, and laid us both down on the stretcher that we were sitting on. Steve sat at the head of the bed holding one of Bucky’s hands and smoothing my hair back.

“Rest Y/N. The rest of the team will be back soon and then we will take you back to the tower with us. I think you’ll fit in quite well.” Bucky said. I felt Steve stop his notions, but quickly resume when Bucky turned his head toward him and mouthed something over my head.

With that in mind, and the exhaustion of my emotions weighing me down, I fell asleep in Bucky’s arms for the first time.

#james bucky barnes #avengers #steve rogers x reader #stucky #bucky x reader #emeto tw #emeto #emetophilia #panic attack

[binunus]

college bf!bin

a/n the duality of this man??? i’m deceased...anyway i did not think this would go this long but uh my hand slipped...happy birthday binnie!

word count: 5k

genre: fluff, smut, (tiny) angst _________________________________________________

ugh yo

bin is so??? infuriatingly hot??? yet cute at the same time

major: exercise science

and because I love mermaid prince/the beginning, he’s been on the swim team since first year college

swam varsity starting his second year

besties with eunwoo, they were roommates their whole college career

alright so bin loves making friends

he’s so playful and talkative once you really get to know him

but his aura?? tbh very intimidating

like he has an rbf and just like he’s so tall, broad shouldered, built, like he just carries himself very strongly that you will get intimidated when you first meet him

very well known in the university

literally has a professional photographed banner of him hanging in the athletic building with the gold medal he won freshman year

a little embarrassed about it

not really, only when the boys (as in literally the other five) tease him

myungjun: woOoOw bin that guy on the banner really looks like you, don’t you think?

rocky: we geeeeet it you’re a star athlete

blah blah blah you know the vibes, they’re endearing

so how do you meet bin?

basically you’re a friend of a friend—you’re eunbi’s (sinb) friend

you’ve only met bin briefly from time to time, but otherwise you never really had any reason to get acquainted with him

your only encounters of him are when he wants to annoy eunbi and she immediately puts him in his place

but then suddenly in the spring semester of your 2nd year, you and him are in the same 8 am

a boring statistics gen ed class that everyone needs to take in order to graduate

you were running a bit late during the first class meeting—you woke up 30 minutes after your alarm and literally rushed out of your apartment—you made it to class with 2 minutes to spare

most of the seats were filled up already, except that one seat in the back left corner by the window next to the one and only moon bin

oh would you look at that

you felt a bit relieved honestly, you didn’t know anyone else in that class so at least you saw a semi-familiar face

he grinned at you when you sat down

“hey y/n”

you were a bit taken back, “you know my name?”

he laughed a little, “yeah of course, you’re one of eunbi’s really good friends, why wouldn’t I know your name?”

before you could respond, the professor started class and ceased your conversation

one thing you realized as the weeks start to go on

you and bin could not give any two fucks about statistics

no offense to stats lovers

every 8 am on mon/wed/fri, neither one of you would pay attention in class

you both enabled each other to not pay attention basically

so when the professor announced the content and date for the first exam

you and bin literally looked at each other with the same expression

you were both fucked

after class was dismissed, instead of the two of you quickly packing your things and fleeing the room immediately, you both lagged a little bit

you: so...do you know anything that’s going to be on the exam?

bin: uh...no? y/n you’re literally right next to me, you know I don’t do jack shit in this class

you: well fuck, how are you gonna study then bin?

bin: I was probably gonna ask my roommate to help me, he passed with a 96 when he took this class

you give him the best puppy dog eyes you could muster up, you lean in and clasp your hands together like you’re praying

“can he help me too...? please?”

bin’s eyes go a lil wide bc you were a bit closer than he was used to and shit was his heart racing rn?

bin: uh...yeah...sure, i’ll text you to come over when we’re gonna study

you beam at him and like in your excitement you give him a hug

“thank you thank you thank you! i literally cannot fail this class. I’ll see you on friday bin!”

with that you grabbed your bag and just left, leaving bin shocked

he’s surprisingly a shy boy okay!

he always thought you were cute from when he first saw you hanging out with eunbi, but ofc he never thought any more of it

until you guys had this class together and he started to think every day, that wow you are really cute

bin texts you the next day

coincidentally, eunbi texts you too

bin: hey this is bin, if you’re free in an hour my roommate’s gonna help me go over the material in ch. 1

eunbi: why did bin ask for your number

you to bin: yes! send me your addy and i’ll be there :)

you to eunbi: we’re in the same stats class lol and we’re gonna study for our exam next week

eunbi: lol moon bin studying? you might wanna bring some wine with you for emergency y/n

you: lol what do you mean by that?

eunbi: binnie hates studying, but good luck!

ahh, eunbi becomes unhinged when it comes to bin

but you know it’s bc they’re that close, they’re literally childhood best friends, more so like siblings

still, studying w him couldn’t be that bad right?

spoiler alert, it went alright

you felt bad showing up to bin’s apartment empty handed so you picked up some coffee before you arrived

you officially meet bin’s roommate, eunwoo, and you’re floored for like 2 minutes bc literally how can a man like him be real?

cue bin being a bit jealous bc yeah he knew his roommate’s perfect but like damn did you have to be affected by him too :(

eunwoo’s a good teacher alright? you actually understood the material from him

you: idk what eunbi’s talking about, you’re actually not that bad at studying bin

bin being offended: oh god what did eunbi say about me

eunwoo smirking: maybe it’s because you’re here y/n, bin usually doesn’t focus this much when it’s just me trying to help him

you: ???

bin in his head: i can’t trust anyone huh 

before you left his place, you and bin planned to meet up and study one more time before your stats exam

it was just you and bin this time

although you’d never admit it, yes you tried to look good for meeting up with him

yeah he’s a friend?? at least you think you were at that level?? but still, he’s a cute friend and you really didn’t want him to see you looking crusty

you and bin end up studying for a whole 5 hours

granted, half of that time you two were messing around, eating food, trying to procrastinate for as long as you could

bc even though you two had a good handle on the material now—thanks to eunwoo—you both still hated statistics

you knew bin started to get more comfortable with you bc he started teasing you

it made you happy hehe so ofc you started to quip back at him

not at the intensity that he and eunbi do but it’s enough for you :)

he walks you back to your apartment after your study session

wow what a gentleman

bin waving bye at your door with the cutest smile: see you in class y/n :)

mayhaps your stomach did a little somersault

anyways

on the day of your exam you were freaking out

you have test anxiety ah ha ha

you woke up at 5 bc you were paranoid about being late to class

you’re like hastily looking over the notes again when you get to class like are you really prepared omg you’re psyching yourself out hella

bin comes in with 2 cups of iced coffee and he’s like woah are you okay

you: i woke up at 5 bin, idk if i can do this omg

you are like visibly in distress rn and he feels like a pang in his chest 

he was gonna mess with you and say like “bet im gonna get a higher grade than you” but he smartly decides against it

instead, he just takes your hand and gives it a little squeeze: y/n, take a deep breath. you’re going to do great, you studied your ass for this and we both know that you got this material down—even eunwoo hyung said you were gonna ace this exam. just trust your instincts, okay? breathe with me.

he was staring at you so intently and genuinely when trying to calm you down

your anxiety yeeted and suddenly you felt shy

you: th...thanks bin...

bin was worried about you while taking the test rip, he kept secretly glancing at you (while also trying not to make it look like he was cheating) just to make sure that you were okay

he walks you to your next class after you both finished your exam

bin: you sure you’re okay? you said you woke up at 5, did you even eat breakfast? let’s get food after your next class.

you were feeling better after the test but like you got so endeared at his fussing

yes you and bin got lunch that day

your exam results were uploaded the next day

you immediately called bin: I GOT A 95

bin: i told you that you would ace it! i got a 90 hehe

you: bin i literally owe you and eunwoo my life, lemme buy you guys food or something

you hear a little bit of bickering over the phone and suddenly you’re talking to eunwoo

eunwoo: i would love some sushi, but since bin can’t eat seafood, why don’t you come watch his swim meet this weekend :)

you: o...h...o-okay yeah i’d love to watch, what time is it? :)

eunwoo: it’s saturday at 10 am

you: okay! i’ll see you there bin

bin already planning on drop kicking eunwoo

cha eunwoo—best wingman™

you basically beg eunbi to go with you to bin’s swim meet

eunbi: i know bin can swim, why do i have to watch him flounder around under water

also eunbi: faster bin! don’t you fucking dare lose!

bin places first this meet

are we shocked? no

okay you mentally prepared yourself for seeing him shirtless, but clearly you didn’t prep enough bc you’re on the cusp of drooling when you’re watching him from the bleachers

and let’s face it, you’re not subtle and eunbi knows everything so she’s literally closing your jaw for you and like messing with you

eunbi: y/n, you’re really sure you like bin? he’s a good guy but c’mon, i think you deserve better

you: since when did i say that i like him ???? and what do you mean ??? i think he checks...all the boxes...for me...

eunbi: maybe it’s bc i’ve known him since when he used to wet his pants so i don’t understand why people are attracted to him, but like...really, you’ve been checking him out since he removed his shirt. even the ref can see that you’re simping over him

you and eunbi meet up with eunwoo and the rest of bin’s friends—that you haven’t met yet but know of

jinjin: oh so you’re the y/n that bin’s been talking about *wink wonk*

baby you’re blushing

even more so when bin comes up to your group

mmm middle parted wet hair, muscle tee and white sweats, towel around his shoulders

he’s so hot ???

you’re all congratulating him blah blah, but like bin keeps glancing at you and all you can do is just smile and like nervous laugh

sanha: y/n! eunbi noona! you should come eat with us to celebrate bin hyung’s win

eunbi glances at you, little smirk on her face: i have plans, but i know y/n’s free! bin you make sure they get home safe after y’alls dinner plans :)

hwang eunbi—best wingwoman™

dinner with the boys was chaotic, you were talking and joking around with them as if you didn’t just meet them today

*you about to get your wallet*

bin, not even able to look at you: it’s okay y/n, i got you this time

cue the boys teasing

astro: kings of making fun of each other

rocky as the group is splitting up: walk y/n home safely hyung :) don’t stay out too late

bin: sorry about them, they’re a bunch of loud idiots...ah haha...

the walk back to your apartment is actually pretty sweet

he didn’t know if you would actually come watch his meet or not but he was excited when he actually saw you

you talk about small random things about yourselves, but it’s not like useless information, you bet that both your subconsciouses are keeping track of whatever y’all are talking about

you give each other a “friendly” hug goodnight...that lasts like a minute or so

and while you’re hugging, bin just can’t help but think that wow you fit so perfectly in his arms

and on the other hand, you’re thinking he feels so warm? so safe? you don’t want to pull away?

but ofc the hug has to end and you’re thanking him for walking you home and he’s like glued to his spot waving goodbye sweetly and waiting for you to go inside so that he knows you’re safely in your apartment before leaving

bin sighing dreamily as he walks back to his and eunwoo’s place

eunwoo waiting on the couch with a glass of water: how was your date ;)

bin: it wasn’t a date, i just walked y/n home

eunwoo: yeah, but you want it to be a date

bin: ...shut up

god why is the pining stage so long

alright everyone knows you and bin like each other

it becomes pretty obvious after the swim meet

you and him fall into this little routine of switching who buys coffee for your 8 am

and then he’d walk you to your next class afterwards

you both still don’t pay attention in stats, sorry

but that means more outside study sessions dates

you come watch his swim meets, whether astro’s there or you’re just watching by yourself

and then you and him get lunch?? early dinner?? right afterwards, it depends on whenever his meet ends

but like??? neither of you have confessed your feelings for each other

even though you both have like a little hint that yeah the feelings are mutual

you and bin are literally like this for 3 months, like damn the semester is almost over

eunbi and eunwoo are tired of your shit, they’re both just like: when the fuck are they getting together? we’re sick of this.

alright so the masterminds literally pay one of eunwoo’s friends from his major to ask you out while you’re studying with bin

let’s do mingyu why not, he was in your korean history class last year

you and bin are in the library, half studying half goofing off per usual

eunwoo, eunbi, and mingyu are at the opposite side of the floor

mingyu: u sure bin won’t clock me for trying to ask out y/n

eunwoo: probably not??

eunbi: just do it please

mingyu giving them both the finger before walking up to your table

“hey y/n...i was wondering if you’d like to get dinner with me...as a date?”

you: o_o huh?

mingyu: i always thought you were cute from when we had class together last year, but i never had the balls to ask you out or anything...you’re not dating anyone, right?

you glance at bin to find that he’s already looking at you with an expression that you don’t really know how to read

you: um...well no I’m not-

bin: actually, we’re dating so y/n can’t go out with you mingyu, sorry.

mingyu’s not even phased, he just gives you a thumbs up and then leaves

you’re confused like literally what is going on—and then you process what bin said and you whip your head to look at him

bin: sorry i said that...i just felt...jealous i guess when mingyu asked you out

you: I wouldn’t have said yes anyway...I sorta like someone else

bin: fuck it, the topic already came up...y/n I’ve liked you for a while now but uh...I don’t know I guess I was scared to tell you because I’m scared of rejection

you just laugh, but not mockingly! more like bin you’re so cute wtf

“bin, why would I reject you when I’ve literally been into you for the past four months?”

it’s safe to say that you and bin officially began dating after that

eunwoo texting in their gc: bin and y/n are finally together

myungjun: fucking finally

bin: how...did u know that eunwoo...?

*eunwoo has left the chat*

alright but bin’s charm?? flirting?? teasing?? sweetness?? up 1000%

bin is touchy y’all, in private his hands are always on you, whether it be sexual or not sexual is up to you

he restrains himself in public ofc, the most he does is put a hand on your waist or hold your hand

eunbi threatens bin early on in your relationship: bin you’re like my brother, but y/n’s one of my dearest friends and if you as much make them cry i will kill you

ofc bin is still eunbi’s punching bag, but when you three are hanging out, he’s dramatic and acts like he’s hurt so he’s like whining to you

sometimes you play along and coo at him like: aww binnie, where does it hurt baby?

other times you’re like: you really think i believe that?? with the size of your biceps??

eunbi: excuse me while i vomit

okay but binnie? bestest sweetest boy

yes he looks all big and intimidating

but he’s soft—especially for you

your nicknames for each other are either “bub” or “baby”

yes will join in making fun of you with the boys, but when you start pouting he’s a goner and will defend you

bin is also a big cuddler, but i mean you’re not complaining hehe

he’s the big spoon, no questions asked

okay but being in bin’s arms is like your favorite place in the world

his frame literally just envelopes you and all you can feel and smell is him and it’s so??? content, you feel at home with him

you feel bad in the morning bc like his arm has to be sore from your weight so you try to like get out of his grasp, but he literally just whines and hugs you tighter

okay but just imagine you and bin napping and his arms are around your waist, his nose is buried in your neck and he wakes up like nuzzling his face in your shoulder like a puppy

im soft

one week you’re staying over at bin’s apartment and then the next week he’s staying over at yours, the cycle goes like that

if you’re one of my ladies with a ~vagíne~, he will buy all your cravings and your tampons/pads, literally anything you want that week, it is yours

doesn’t really get jealous now that you two are official, he knows that you’re his and he’s yours

you two lightly bicker like friends, but you’ve never had a terrible fight before

you were really close to though—or...like you did?? but it was resolved really quick

one of the only problems of bin is that he hates showing weakness and it takes him a whole lot to truly fully 100% be vulnerable with someone even if it’s someone close to him

he pulled a muscle in his arm and it cost him one of his swim meets

he had to go to rehab for like a month and you knew that mentally he’s been off bc of it

you try to ease talking him into telling you about how he’s really feeling but he just kept dodging the subject

one night after one of his rehab sessions, he came back to your place and you’re just like

“hey bubbie, how was rehab? how are you doing?”

and he just snaps at you: stop asking me how I am, y/n, it’s getting really annoying

you’re taken aback, like what the fuck where did that come from?

your eyebrows furrow and you cross your arms bc you are not going to get spoken to like that

“so me worrying about you and wondering how your recovery’s going is annoying? that’s what a partner is supposed to do, moon bin. what’s going on with you?”

bin: you’re being suffocating! it’s the only thing you ask me about nowadays, sometimes I—

oh boy you got mad

you: I ask you because I know you’re not telling me things! I know you’re suffering by yourself and I want to let you know that I’m here for you, I want to help take some of the pain away or at least help you deal with it because I’m your partner! but how can I if you can’t even let me in?? we’re fucking dating moon bin, we’re supposed to go through rough times together. and you call me suffocating...? 

bin’s silent and he’s looking at the floor

you sigh, tears are building in your eyes because you’re frustrated and a bit hurt by what he said, and your voice cracks when you speak again: if i’m suffocating you, then you should leave. text me or something when you can breathe again, I don’t know.

there’s a bit of spite in your words, hidden by the pain

bin sees the tears rolling down your cheeks and that’s when he knows he fucked up

he’s never seen you cry before—besides like from a sad movie or something

so like the fact that he made you cry and hurt you with his words? damn he hates himself rn

he immediately wraps his arms around you, and you like try to push him to get away bc why is he hugging you? didn’t he just say that you were suffocating? why is he confusing

bin: baby, I’m sorry...I shouldn’t have taken out my frustrations on you, you’re not suffocating me I promise...you’re right about everything, I should be sharing things with you and telling you how I’m really feeling...I’m sorry.

you don’t say anything and just like sniffle and he picks you up and brings you to your bedroom and then he just lets it all out

he tells you how rehab is hard and like yeah his muscle pain is going away, but he doesn’t know if he can swim as fast as he used to and that scares him

and he tells you that sometimes he’s thought of giving up swimming since his injury, but then he thinks of you and that’s how he’s still going through with rehab

you’re his motivator and comfort but he doesn’t want to show you his weak side bc he hates that part of himself

and at this point, bin starts tearing up and you’re like stroking his hair to try and comfort him

bin: I’m not good at telling my feelings baby...probably why I didn’t tell you I liked you until 4 months later...but I promise I’ll work harder and at least try and tell them to you.

ugh pain

anyway your communication with serious things got better after that encounter

eunbi finding out that you and bin argued and he made you cry and she literally punched his stomach

you: omg eunbi stop

bin: it’s okay...I sorta deserved that

eunbi: why...are you not swearing at me? shit, bin are you okay?

he nods to the girl and just puts an arm around your shoulder: we talked things through, don’t worry. I’m all good now, but I did deserve that punch because I hurt y/n when I promised you I wouldn’t

bin ends up having a full recovery and bam his first swim meet after he got the clear from the PT, he gets first place again

all the boys and you and eunbi were there supporting him

bin was hella nervous before the meet started, but you gave him a little good luck kiss and was like: I believe in you bub, no matter the result, as long as you give it your all and don’t hurt yourself again, you’ll be the winner to me :)

this was actually when the first “i love you” was said

after your little pep talk in the locker room, bin’s just hugging you and holding you for comfort

and he just went out with it

“I love you y/n”

you blush hella hard bc you were not expecting that

obviously you’ve been feeling it like yeah your feelings for bin have grown into love for a while now

you just bury your face in his chest and hug him tighter

“I love you too binnie, now go get em bub.”

he smiles and kisses you and tells you that he’ll see you after the meet is over

you come back to the crowd where the boys and eunbi are and you just have a huge smile on your face, you’re literally glowing

myungjun: please tell me you guys didn’t fuck before his swim meet

speaking of fucking

okay let’s get down and dirty ladies and gents wink wonk mmm grr bark bark

bin is so sexy y’all like i dont need to tell you that

he’s 100% a tease

you have a little muscle kink hehe

which bin very much uses to his advantage

if bin is wearing a sleeveless shirt, you bet he wants to smash that day

will walk around shirtless after a shower or after a workout just to turn you on and then depending on his mood, he might tease you for like an hour or you’ll just get right to it

he’s very proud of his body and the work he put into it and knowing that you get turned on from one look of it?? gives him an ego boost, he loves it

one time at a party, he wore a crop top (mm hello bad idea bin) and you literally went feral

you dragged him inside the nearest bathroom and just started making out

he’s an ass guy

...all of astro are ass guys, it’s just obvious with how much they slap each other’s asses and poke each other’s assholes

okay you know how he’s touchy right? i mentioned that earlier

he always wants you on his lap

even if there’s a space available, nope your seat is his thighs

ofc when the situation allows, like you’re not gonna sit on his lap in class duh

most of the time in public like if you’re hanging out with the boys or something, it’s innocent

but if he wants to be a tease, he’ll literally just tighten his grip on your hips and grind you down onto his cock

subtle, he won’t straight up thrust into you

just enough to get his dick stirring and make you feel the outline of it through your pants

and then he just stops and hugs your waist again?? wtf

his major’s exercise science right? will ask if he can practice on you for anatomy and physiology, but you know after touching you in a couple places, y’all will just end up fucking

likes to bite and mark

very proud seeing the hickeys he leaves on you

you can bite, but you can’t bruise, idk his upper body is exposed a lot bc swimming so you can’t really leave any marks on him unless it’s the off season

foreplay’s cool, but he prefers the main event, he just wants to be in you

as much as he loves doggy, his fav position is the hook

(it’s when your legs are on his shoulders ohoho and it just lets him fuck you in a deeper angle mmm)

also in the hook, he can choke you

if i have a choking kink, you have a choking kink

okay little tangent, choking is so hot?

like just imagine you and bin are making out, he pushed you against the wall, literally grinding his hips into you, and his hand just comes up and squeezes your throat? that’s so sexy

likes butt stuff oops

i don’t make the rules, he just does

daddy kink, but no power play

will not degrade you (even if you really just want him to call you his dirty slut) bc he really values seeing you as equals

seeing your face when you cum is a must

almost always: you cumming → bin cumming

nothing gets him off more than knowing that he’s making you feel good

after !! care !!

sweetest boy!!

will clean you up with a warm towel after sex

and if you’re one of my ladies, he will always remind you to pee so that you don’t get a UTI

if y’all had a marathon or something, he will draw a bath and carry you to the bathroom and you will bathe together, so soft

always ends sex with an i love you :’)

okay let’s get back to the soft stuff

special thing about swimmer bin: pool dates

sometimes when he’s practicing and it’s just him, he asks you to come to the aquatic center and you two end up splashing around and being cute together

he like knew that you were the one for him some time during senior year

it was the holidays and his parents invited you to spend christmas with their family since your parents were out of the country this break

his parents and sister liked you immediately—which you were so scared about, but bin just knew

you woke up early christmas eve (and bin was out like a rock) so you just went downstairs to brew some coffee or something and you saw that his mom was already starting on making food

naturally, you offered your help and she was like no, you’re a guest y/n, but obviously you started helping

bin comes downstairs like an hour or two later to see you, his mom, and his dad just cooking and listening to christmas music and talking and his heart just like swells??

you: morning binnie :)

his mom: how can you be sleeping when y/n’s here helping us with christmas dinner

his dad: what kind of boyfriend are you, son?

just kidding all jokes

but that’s the moment when he knew

best boyfriend bin ugh

he becomes a legend in the school for swimming

but doesn’t continue after college, he’s all about becoming a physical trainer after graduation

he goes to grad school, while you’re out working in business

bin moves in with you after graduating, it was the obvious next step

you do talk about the future together, but obviously bin’s still in school and you’re both fresh from undergrad so there’s no rush yet to tie the knot

doesn’t stop his or your parents from talking to you two about marriage tho oops

ugh but the domesticity after bin moves in with you? superb

like yeah obviously you both basically lived together anyway when he still roomed with eunwoo just from how much you and him spent at each other’s places

but like your apartment is now both of your place and it’s like your home is finally complete

your apartment becomes the reunion place for the boys and eunbi

at this point everyone knew you and bin were gonna get married eventually

eunwoo and eunbi: we did that ;)

and that’s how you and your college bf!bin live happily ever after uwu

happy birthday binnie moonbob ♥

1-25-21

#im in love with bin ???? #like one second i think eunwoo is my bias and then i see bin and suddenly im questioning my life? #happy birthday binnie moonbob! #it's the first astro birthday im celebrating as an aroha :') #i was literally in my nursing zoom class and i got the notif on vlive that bin went on #i never clicked a button so fast #moonbin #moon bin #bin #astro bin #astro moonbin #binnie moonbob #astro #astro au #astro headcanons #astro fluff #astro smut #astro scenarios #astro scenario #astro fic #moonbin au #moonbin fluff #moonbin smut #moonbin scenarios #moon bin au #moon bin fluff #moon bin smut #moon bin scenarios #bin au #bin fluff

[cheeriecherry]

I saw ur dating headcanons and they were really sweet, so what about //checks notes// All Might, Hawk, and Tamaki? i am but a simp

Ur darn tootin’ I can I can’t believe I just typed that Anyways, headcanons requests are open!

All Might|Yagi Toshinori

-An actual ray of sunshine, love is stored in the Toshinori. For real though, he’s such a good boyfriend??? He genuinely cares about you and wants to support you however he can and would probably bring you the moon if it made you happy.

-So you guys probably met either as both heroes, or both as civilians. I think he’d be too worried about openly dating a civilian as All Might, but if you were a hero he’d be a little more okay with it, since you can obviously take care of yourself. But if you met him as Toshinori and not as All Might, that would be the best case scenario.

-However you guys meet, he’s probably really drawn to you at first, maybe not even romantically, just interested in you as a person. So he makes small talk to test the waters, see if you’re into the potential of a friendship, and you guys end up hitting it off!

-You probably don’t get to hang out very much, what with him being a teacher and living on the Yuuei campus, and you being a pro with your own busy work life. So you guys exchange phone numbers and keep in contact that way! He prefers to actually talk to you over the phone, but if you’re not feeling up to it he’ll settle for texting.

-Send him memes and watch his confusion as he tries to figure out what the hell the image means. He loves his kids, but he’s really not in with the young crowd XD

-Like doing relaxing activities with you, like walks in the park, private dinners and lunches, and corny shit like getting dressed up and slow dancing in your living room. He really is a huge sap, and values the time you have together.

-He gets down on himself sometimes, blames himself for a lot of things, so give him gentle affirmations and kind words. Tell him what you like about him, how he makes you feel, how you appreciate him, stuff like that! And if he’s still sad, then lay the logic on him, give him facts and truths that he can’t deny. It might not solve the problem right away, but he’ll at least appreciate your efforts.

-He loves you so much tho, like damn. He is absolutely your number one fan, biggest simp on the block. All you have to do is look at him and he turns into a pile of mush, you just make him happy, and help him feel at peace.

-He loves cuddling, too. In public, hell yeah he’s gonna hold ur hand, and kiss your cheek, and hug you close. But in private is really where it’s at. He becomes an octopus, pressing up against you and wrapping you up in his arms. He likes feeling you so close to him, feeling the warmth from your body and the best of your heart.

-If u guys are snuggled up somewhere and you stat playing with his hair, he’s gonna turn into a cat. His eyes fall shut and he just lays there in bliss.

-As sweet as he is, it can also backfire. He’s a worrier by nature, so whenever you’re not around, or you’re not answering your phone, his mind immediately jumps to ‘did they get hurt’. Even if 99% of the time you’re just busy or on patrol or something, he’s still gonna stress. His job hasn’t really been to kind to him in that aspect, and he’s learned to always be looking over his shoulder.

-The tried and true way to calm him down is to give him a lil kiss, on the forehead, on the cheek, on the back of his hand, all over his face, you name it. It never fails to make him smile.

-His kisses tho. What a way to make you melt. You can feel the love he has for you poured into every kiss, whether its a small peck, or a more heated make out. The way he holds your face is so gentle, as if you’re the most precious thing in the world to him. Which, well, you kind of are.

-He’s a good guy though, and his love for you is immeasurable. He requires a lot of verbal affirmations and soft touches, and he always returns them tenfold. He’s willing to help you out with work cases if you need it, and supports you in all your escapades. He’s funny, and charming, and sweet, and absolutely loyal to you. Please be gentle with his heart.

Hawks|Takami Keigo

-This mf.

-Dating him is both a really good idea, and a really bad idea. He’s young, he’s famous, he’s on a lot of people’s shit lists. Dating him would without a doubt put you in danger at some point. That being said, once you actually get him to open up, he’s kind and funny and smart and loyal.

-Something I think he’d really like in a person is genuineness and honesty. Not necessarily wearing your heart on your sleeve, but a willingness to open up once you trust him. He likes knowing things about you, your hobbies and interests and dislikes, the way you like your eggs, what you take in your coffee, mundane stuff like that. He never really gets to know people on a deeper level, so it’s something he enjoys with you.

-It would probably take a long time of knowing him before you started dating. He’d want to get to know you as a friend first, know that you wouldn’t just be using him for popularity. Plus he’d want to trust you some before he starts baring his heart to you, because despite his persona, he has a lot of troubles and shit he’s hidden away.

-Don’t push him to open up, though. That’s the fastest way to get him to clam up. Instead let him know that you’re there for him, both with words and actions. If you tell him you’re gonna do something, then make sure you do it. Not only will he be proud of your accomplishments, but he’ll gradually learn that he can trust your word.

-It might also help him be more comfy opening up if you also let him in on your more private life. Tell him about things that have scared you in the past, or done harm to you, events, people, whatever you’re willing to let him in on. He’s not gonna tell anyone unless you ask him to, though he will later joke about wanting to kick the asses of the people who’ve hurt you.

-He’s hella protective of you. Not possessive, he wants you to be able to do your own thing and maintain your own life, but if anyone dares hurt a hair on your head then he’s going to hunt them down. He makes that fact pretty clear to the public.

-He will try and convince you to take precautions about your safety, because of his job. Like moving in with him as soon as you’re ready, making sure someone always knows where you’re planning to be in case something happens, stuff like that. If he ever gets a little to suffocating, let him know and be up front about it. He’ll sulk for a while, but he’ll do his best to trust you on the matter.

-This guy is also touch starved as fuck. Like, god when was the last time someone held him. Some please hold him.

-He won’t always ask for physical affection, beyond some hugs and cuddles in bed, so it’s up to you to read his body language and know when he needs it. If he looks even slightly stressed or like there’s a crack in his facade, lay down on the couch, hold him against your chest, and pet his hair until the tension eases out of his body.

-Once he’s all nice and mellow, he’ll perk up a little and stretch up for a kiss. It probably starts small and then escalates to something more, because let’s be real here, his desire for physical touch absolutely carries over to kissing. He can’t get enough of you, and probably tries to kiss you even at the most inopportune times.

-The first time he showed you his true colours, he ended up crying in your arms until he fell asleep. He tried to apologize for it later probably, but you better shut that shit down and reinforce the fact that he is a person and not an object and that he has feelings and needs and that he’s allowed to be sad and angry and scared.

-If he’s shown you all of himself, then that’s it for him. You’re it for him. You’re his person, and he’s never going to love someone else the way he loves you. After he decides this, expect his affection to quadruple. 

-He’ll bring you trinkets that made him think of you, odds and ends for whatever you collect, pretty clothes, fancy food, you name it. Nothing is too expensive for him, even if you scold him for being too lavish sometimes.

-Will take you to every event that he’s allowed to, and will proudly show you off to everyone you meet, even if they already know who you are. He’ll be close by you the whole night, with your shoulders bumping or a hand on the small of your back. He just really loves being near you.

-If it’s a fancy event that he takes you to, like a gala or smth, then you bet your ass he’s gonna dance with you all night long. Screw socializing with other people, you’re all dolled up and looking fiiiine asf, all his attention is on you. And honestly it’s pretty romantic, just swaying with him while he holds you close, foreheads touching, whispering quiet nothings to each other. The tabloids probably get some really good shots of you guys making gooey eyes at each other.

-A good asf boyfriend. Hard egg to crack, but once he lets you into his heart, he’s squishy and really a nice person. He overworks and hides his stress well, but once he trusts you he’ll let you help with that. He’s protective and soft just for you, and probably the most loyal of the bunch (which is saying a lot). Good for cuddling and hanging out with, and all your dates are fun because he hasn’t had the chance to do a lot of leisure things, which is a little sad, but it also means you get to see the way his eyes light up when he tries something new.

Suneater|Amajiki Tamaki

-Okay I relate to this guy the most in terms of personality. I, too, am an anxious mess. But I digress, you’re here for him, not me XD Anyways. You’re going to have to be the one to ask him out, hands down. Unless he’s 100% certain about your feelings, it’s gonna be you.

-And you’ll want to get to know him as a friend first, otherwise he’ll turn you down. Slow, small steps are a friend to anxiety, so you have to work your way up. Spend time getting to know him in all aspects of his life. Take in interest in things he likes, show that you pay attention to him, ask for advice about things, that sort of stuff. Show him that you trust him and respect his opinions, it’ll help him to trust you and yours.

-He’s shy as hell when you first start dating. Like, he almost stops breathing at the thought of holding your hand, never mind kissing you. Again, you’ll have to be the one to initiate, but please do it somewhere private or less populated. Always make sure to give him an out if he gets uncomfortable.

-Once you do manage to get to the kissing stage, though, I think he’d actually be the one to ask you for it. It would probably be weighing on his mind for days, so much so that he’s more distracted than usual, and you take notice. If you ask him what’s wrong, he’ll deflate and quietly admit that he can’t stop thinking about you, and then he’ll turn bright red.

-Reassure him that you’re into it and that you feel the same way, and that kiss is gonna happen.

-His kisses are really sweet and soft, the kind of kiss that just turns your heart into a puddle and makes your stomach flutter. And the more you do it, the more confident he gets. He might even be able to eventually work up to kissing you before class in the hallway, or in passing at the dorms.

-Behind closed doors, he’s a lot more bold. He definitely likes for you to take the lead with things, but when it’s just the two of you he’s not so shy about his desire to be close to you, and has no qualms about laying down beside you and holding you close, or resting his head on your thigh while you study.

-Please touch him regularly, a hand on his shoulder here, a gentle nudge there. He likes your touch, and he likes how gentle and non abrasive you are.

-Dates will almost always be chill. Mundane things like walks on the beach, trips to the zoo, a night in with home made dinner and a movie, soft shit like that is his jam.

-He’s also surprisingly protective of you, even though he knows you can hold your own. He wants to make sure that you never have to face anything by yourself, though, since everyone is stronger when they’re not alone. You make him stronger, so he wants to return the favour.

-That being said, if he’s watching you train then he’s not going to jump in and help, he knows you need to practice. He’ll be cheering you on from the sidelines instead! Very quietly, but you can see in his smile the pride he has for you.

-A good boi, a very good boi. He’s sweet and gentle, caring, and though he gets hella anxious sometimes, he’s always gonna do his best to be there for you, and be someone worth your time (even tho he’s already worth your time as he is). He’ll support you and listen to you, and help you solve problems if you have them, and if you’re just feeling shitty about something then he’ll cuddle the crap out of you. He’s strong in his own way, and you know that he tries so hard, so make sure to tell him how much you appreciate his efforts!

#all might x reader #yagi toshinori x reader #hawks x reader #takami keigo x reader #suneater x reader #amajiki tamaki x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha headcanons #Anonymous

[binniedeactivated]

𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 ↺ || 𝐡.𝐤.

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 |  𝐡𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐤𝐚𝐢 𝐱 𝐦𝐢𝐱𝐞𝐝!𝐩𝐨𝐜 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 |  𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞!𝐚𝐮 , "𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫" 𝐚𝐮.

𝐖/𝐂 |  15.389k

𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 | (𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐞 "𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫") 𝐮𝐩𝐨𝐧 𝐠𝐚𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞'𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐲𝐚𝐥 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭. 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬, 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐞𝐥, 𝐡𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐤𝐚𝐢.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 | 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐲 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟, 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬.

a/n; i miss making legit fics for yall ;(((((( and I feel bad because I haven’t been writing as much as I should I’m so so sorry <3

“so what are you? sophomore? freshman?”. bria asks, stuffing her foot into her platformed converse. gabrielle nods, folding a shirt and inserting it into her drawer. “wow I wasn’t expecting them to give me a freshman for a roommate”. she scoffs kind of smug. “is that a problem?”. gabrielle speaks up, pushing a puffy curly strand of hair over to the other side of her head. bria only grinned and shook her head no. “nah. that just means I have a lot to teach you”.

“teach me?”.

“yeah”, bria agrees, in the mirror coating her lips with gloss. bria was a dark skinned five foot eight beauty. if gabrielle didn’t know any better she’d mistake her for a model almost. she had gorgeous curly afro hair, similar to that of a lion’s mane. gabrielle hadn’t saw much of her wardrobe yet but just by the edgy outfit she was already wearing she could tell that her style was to die for. her lips were thick and full and complimented her cat-like eyes well. gabrielle thought maybe she could pick up a few tips from her, especially with makeup. it was so perfect she could feel herself shrinking into her own insecurities. she thought she was pretty decent looking but no where near bria's level. gabrielle herself had honey brown skin, big brown curly hair with lots of volume. heart shaped lips. large brown wistful eyes with clear glasses frames worn over them. she was sort of chubby. her physique wasn't something she saw as a win in her eyes. her chest was average sized and her ass was there yet barely visible. and her waist definitely wasn't as snatched as bria's. but still, if she was going to be in college amongst those who looked different from her she had to try and gain some type of confidence about herself.

“what is there to teach me?”.

bria scoffs again, screwing the cap back onto her gloss. “you don’t want to know what it’s like to live the life here? trust me girl I’m almost a senior I can teach you a few things”.

“like what? if you’re talking about partying and all that I’m going to have to pass. I just got here and I don’t want to be running into trouble”.

“girl how is partying going to get you in trouble? you’re grown now. you don’t have you parents watching over you anymore. you can be free and do what you want to do”.

gabrielle grabs another shirt. “yeah but suppose one of ya’ll do some illegal shit? and then what? I can’t tell the cops that I wasn’t involved because I’m just a freshman. I’m going to jail right with ya’ll”.

bria tilts her head back and laughs. “you’re a trip if you think we ever do illegal shit and get caught”.

gabrielle shuts her drawer, moving another box across the room to her desk. “yeah well, I don’t want to be involved anyway. even the risk is too much. plus I don’t know how my boyfriend is going to feel about me out partying with other guys and shit”.

bria made a tsk noise with her lips prior to walking to her closet for her collection of purses. “you really came to college with a boyfriend? just how dumb are you?”.

“what? what’s wrong with having a boyfriend?”.

“girl do I even have to ask? look at you. you’re already uptight. you don’t want to party, you’re worried about what he might think. he already has you right where he wants you. living a boring life like him”.

gabrielle shifts her weight on her feet. “he doesn’t--live a boring life. he’s just protective”.

“tsk. that’s what he told you?”.

“well yeah--”.

“how old is your little boyfriend?”.

“he’s seventeen”.

bria tilts her head back and does that laugh again. the one that made gabrielle seem out out of place. mostly because she didn’t know what was funny to begin with. “yeah he’s young he’s still a senior in high school so what?”. she quickly defends.

“girl that ain’t gonna work. you’re in college you have to level up”.

“my boyfriend is fine. he’s all the leveling up I need”.

“mhm. we’ll see about that. anyways, I’m going to my girlfriend’s suite later you should come”.

“suite?”.

bria rolls her eyes. “girl relax we’re not going to be doing anything illegal. just chilling. maybe a little drinking or smoking but--i wouldn’t call that illegal”.

“drinking and smoking? I’ll pass”.

“you don’t have to do it. you’re acting like there’s going to be people there forcing you. it’s going to be her friends and a little bit of mine. if you want to make some lit friends quickly then I suggest you come so you can get yourself out there a little”.

“don’t worry. I can make friends in my classes”.

“aren’t you a biology major?”.

“yeah”.

“then you definitely need to come. or else you’re going to be playing battle of the nerds these next four years”.

gabrielle rolls her eyes, “what’s your major anyways?”.

“fashion design”.

gabrielle nods her head in response. that made a whole lot of sense.

“so? gabby? you coming or what because if so I want to see what you’re wearing”.

“it’s just a suite gathering right? I’m not trying to wear nothing special. probably like a sweater, some ripped jeans and sneakers”.

“pft ‘gathering’. you are so proper. outfit sounds cute but don’t you want to wear something a little revealing? you need to get a new man”.

gabrielle rolls her eyes. “like i said before I’m happy with the guy I have. and no I don’t want to wear anything revealing, have these guys out here thinking that they’re going to get a chance to fuck me”.

“and what’s wrong with that?”.

“everything”.

“whatever. I’ll be back to come grab you later. be ready.”. bria prompts before swinging a bag over her shoulder and leaving the room. gabrielle rolls her eyes. she continues organizing the knick knacks on her desk, most importantly the picture of her and her boyfriend. she missed him dearly and with her college being two hours away from home she didn’t know what she was going to do away from him from so long. texting and facetiming helped but there was nothing like being around him. she huffs her breath though, trying to push the thought to the back of her mind until she was ready to think of it again.

when she started getting dressed she was thinking more and more about what bria was saying. she wanted to look like herself but she still wanted to look cute because at the end of the day, she didn’t know bria or her girlfriend’s friends. this would be their first impression of her so she wanted to make it count. she pulls a scrunchie through her ponytail in a half up half down hairstyle and throws on a couple of hand rings and necklaces to go along with her outfit. she wasn’t too keen on makeup but she did apply winged eyeliner and a bit of lipstick just to keep herself from looking too plain. she looked over at herself in the mirror almost one hundred times, posing so she could see herself from different angles. she wondered if she really looked as good as she thought she did.

“girl you ready--ou okay! so you want to get a new man tonight after all?”. bria says while barging in, scaring the hell out of gabrielle. “damn can you stop screaming? no I don’t want a new man. I just want to look nice”. bria smirks. “whatever. if we don’t leave now we’re going to get there hella late so let’s go”.gabrielle nods and takes her phone off it’s charger. it was getting kind of dark outside but she could already hearing laughing and playing inside the quads of campus. she figured night time was only the beginning of all the fun.

“so? how is it here for real?”. gabrielle asked while they were walking, bria held her phone in her face preparing to take a selfie. “it’s actually not that bad. it’s just like every other college. has it’s pros and cons but at the end of the day, it depends on who you know. as long as you surround yourself with lit people you’ll have a good time”. gabrielle nods. she wanted to surround herself with those kind of people but she needed to focus on her studies. in high school she wasn’t in the mix too much. so she didn’t really know how she was going to function being around them in college. for the most part she had good control over herself, so she wasn’t worried.

when bria said suite, gabrielle wasn’t taking it quite literal. she hadn’t known the seniors practically had two floor suites together. gabrielle had never felt the sudden urge to rush and be a senior in her life. the living room was full with a bunch of people which automatically gave gabrielle anxiety. bria kisses her girlfriend on the lips before intertwining her fingers with hers. “babe this is my roommate gabby. gabby this is my girlfriend diamond”. gabrielle gave her a shy greeting trying to figure out if everyone bria knew looked just as good as she did. diamond was also a fair-skinned doll. “she’s a freshman I’m trying to make her make some friends”. bria comments. “they roomed you with a freshman?”. diamond asks. “right? that’s what I thought. but don’t worry she’s gonna be lit soon”. gabrielle rolls her eyes and scans around the room. there were people in the living room and kitchen it seemed. there was music playing and some of them was drinking and/or smoking and some weren’t which gabrielle liked.

when scanning though she wasn’t expecting her eyes to land on a certain someone, or rather, a certain someone’s eyes to be landed on her. his hair was black and long down the nape of his neck and over his eyes a bit. he wore a black hoodie, black jeans and sneakers. his overall aesthetic was dark gabrielle noticed, he also had a couple of finger nails painted black and a large cuban linked necklace peeking from his hoodie collar. his lips were pink and supple and his eyes were deep set and light brown, boring into hers. needless to say gabrielle thought he was the most gorgeous thing she’s ever laid her eyes on. she looks away to avoid his gaze and he smirks in response.

bria went around introducing her to everyone before going elsewhere with diamond. it kind of scared gabrielle because now she was forced to fiend for herself. everyone seemed considerably chill though and welcoming, offering her blunts and drinks to which she kindly declined. they didn’t seem to care, instead talked to her about other things like asking her her major and telling her how pretty she was. and every so often she’d try to join in the conversation to stay on her toes. she thought college gatherings would be much more crazier than this, maybe some project X party type of scene. she was shocked to see how cool they actually were, and how easily she clicked with them. things didn’t start getting a little wilder until later when a bunch of them gathered in the middle of the floor to play a drunk spin the bottle game. something gabrielle declined also, well, her and others. specifically that guy that was staring at her earlier, whom was leaning on the wall talking to some of his friends. his eyes broke away from them and fled to her every so often, admiring how pretty she was. and if anyone knew heuning kai, which everyone had, they knew that girls like gabrielle were the type of girls he aimed for.

“I take it that you don’t drink or party often?”. he spoke lightly, making gabrielle almost freeze in place. his voice was smoother than she imagined it. subtle, yet serious. “um--yeah it’s not really my thing”. she assures nervously, wanting more than anything to detach from his eyes but he was leaning on the kitchen counter near her and he had this addictive gaze that she couldn’t get enough of. not to mention he was six feet even, tall enough to be quite intimidating over her five foot five frame. “what’s your name?”. he smirked a little at her nervous fidgeting. “gabrielle”. he nods. “hm. gabrielle. you pretty. you know that?”. he took a quick sip of his drink and it was there where she noticed the silver rings around his fingers. why the hell was he so attractive?

“thank you”.

“i don’t really do all of this either. maybe we can chill somewhere together”.

gabrielle scoffs. “no, I’m fine. I know what guys mean when they say they want to chill. and I’m not that type of girl”.

“I’m not the type of guy to beat around the bush. if i wanted something from you I would’ve just said it. but”, he shrugs. “I want to hang with you. and if you don’t want to that’s fine”.

she bit the inside of her cheeks thinking, which was a bad move because by the the time she conjured up an answer he already walked off, leaving her feeling kind of stupid and the scene ate at her for days. she kept thinking of other answers she could’ve given him to make her seem less rude. he probably hated her now and thought she was uptight. one thing’s for sure she wasn’t going to tell bria about this just to avoid the teasing and taunting about it all. but gabrielle couldn’t help herself. she found herself wanting heuning kai’s attention. she wanted to be the girl that he desired. and ever since that night it seemed as if she saw him everywhere.

“he’s so fucking cute--”. her seatmate mutters in philosophy, gabrielle was too busy doodling on the edge of her notebook sheet to pay attention. “who?”. she asked without even looking up. “him”.

she shifts her attention away from her paper and captures a sight of kai. his hair was parted over his eyes this time and he wore a white turtleneck underneath a black ripped jean jacket. he still had different fingernails of his painted black, and a thin silver necklace wrapped tightly around his neck. gabrielle watched as his hair sifted every time he walked. he was the type of gorgeous where every time you saw him it was like everything was happening in slow motion. he had the fair share of girls surround him and his guy friends who encouraged him to sit by them. while he was on his way to his seat his eyes locked with gabrielle’s for a swift moment. her heart raced. her seatmate tapped her vigorously. “girl! who was he looking at?! was he looking at you?”. she whispered excitedly. the professor arrives and sits his bag down on the desk in front of the class. “I don’t know”.

“I’m assuming you’re all coming to class with a fresh memory of the reading from last night”, professor witman started, “I want you to take out your notebooks, laptops, phones or whatever you use to take your notes on and I want to ask you this, would you rather be a big fish in a small pond or a small fish in a big pond? and why?”. he takes a piece of chalk and scrawls the letters on the blackboard. “I want you to be really thinking about this”. almost instantly gabrielle could see everyone writing or typing away. but she was too deep in thought. about the question, and about heuning kai. he stared at her like that frequently and she never knew what it meant. or how she could reproach him. she was far too intimidated to. maybe he would’ve shrugged her off. maybe he would’ve just flat out ignored her. he had enough clout and divine looks to deny anyone and still have a line of people waiting to date him. gabrielle just wanted to smack herself. what the hell was she doing thinking about him? she had a boyfriend back home. a boyfriend whose been loving her for almost two years now.

“heuning kai. share your thoughts”. professor witman directed. and like always, but much more literal now, all eyes were on the attractive tall boy at the back of the lecture hall.

“the way I see it it’s kind of like a double edged sword”, he talked with his hands and with certainty, “if you’re a big fish in a small pond you’re among the privileged. you have life going for yourself. you do the best at everything, you’re at the top of everyone’s list, you cross every t and dot every I. life is good. but at the end of the day it’s just because you’re in a small pond. outside of that pond you’re just a normal fish like everyone else. however if you’re a small fish in a big pond you’re hidden. no one really notices you, everyone looks over your intelligence, talents , and wit. there’s going to be people miles ahead of you and people miles behind you. but in this big pond there are big fish that you can learn from and help you overall grow as a person. so even though you’re a small, you’re gradually improving yourself. you’ve made mistakes and you harness them to your advantage. so yeah”, he continues. “I’d rather be a small fish”. all eyes rested back on the professor who nods his head in agreement. quite impressed with his answer.

“well said heuning. well said”.

he began calling on others but gabrielle kept her mind fixated on kai. there was no way he was attractive and smart at once. she never heard of that before. attractive and rebellious yes. attractive with horrible grades yes. but she never came across someone like kai before. she was intrigued.

"cute right? I think I'm going to ask him out". gabrielle heard a voice beside her while she was walking out of class. the sudden voice startled her a little, she wasn't expecting to be interrupted by anyone especially when she was staring at the boy for what it felt like the umpteenth time. she quickly tried to act like she was looking for someone. "ask who out?". gabrielle asks. the girl nudges her, directing her attention to the infamous rebel at the end of the hallway, talking and joking around with some of his boys. "kai", she nods with certainty, "I think I'm going to ask him to go out with me this weekend or something. then again I probably shouldn't have told you that. you probably were planning on doing the same thing". gabrielle quickly shakes her head no. "I wasn't actually I was trying to figure out which way to go for my next class". the girl curled her lips into a dubious grin of disbelief. "yeah right. you're telling me you're not attracted to heuning kai at all?". gabrielle pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "I never said that it's just I wasn't planning on asking him out or anything". the girl hummed. "yeah well don't tell anyone that I'm planning on doing that. I already know everyone else is going to try to rush to do it before I do". gabrielle fiddled with the corners of her notebook pages. "yeah no problem". and with that they parted ways. the girl went to meet him at the end of the hallway and gabrielle walked past them both, trying to process the fact that kai took a quick look in her eyes before he looked at the girl in front of him.

within a few weeks her newfound friend from her biology class observed her well. especially while they were walking in the quads. it seemed as if gabrielle couldn’t keep her eyes off of him. all the while he kept his attention elsewhere, either horsing around with his friends or talking to them.

“don’t tell me you’re falling for him too”. michelle insinuates.

“too?”,

“heuning kai has enough girls swooning over him that they all could probably wrap around this campus”.

“look at him. you don’t think it makes sense?”.

“well yeah it makes a whole lot of sense but you don’t want to get caught up with him. i heard he’s trouble“.

“what kind of trouble?”.

“trouble. why are you worried? i thought you had a boyfriend anyways”.

“I do but for some reason I just-- I can’t help who I’m attracted to”.

“well you need to. he’s no good”.

gabrielle exhales, listening. yet her eyes peered up at the boy anyways. what a mistake that was. she caught him doing the same thing. no smirk, no smile or anything. just a stare that captivated her enough to where the rest of the world blurred around her. she took heed to michelle’s advice for a couple of days, where she only focused on her school work and seeing what her boyfriend was up to back home. he was doing well and from the looks of his snapchat and instagram stories it seemed that he was having some fun of his own. he too was partying and hanging with friends also. it only made gabrielle think about the other possibilities. how was she so sure that he wasn’t with some other girl? or took interest in someone else? everything was so unclear while she was far away. she never took her boyfriend to be the cheating type. but the both of them were living in two separate worlds now. in his world he was still trapped in his high school lifestyle. but in hers, becoming appealing to heuning kai was all she could think about. and she hated it.

she drains the water out of her hair and fluffs it, throwing a bathrobe on to go to her room and study. she hoped bria wasn’t there because she really needed some alone time to collect her thoughts for a while. and let’s just say bria wasn’t the quietest person to study around. she twists the doorknob of the room and jumped back with shock, dropping her toiletries and clothes right in front of the door. it was heuning kai, relaxing on bria’s bed scrolling through his phone as if he belonged there. once his eyes laid on gabrielle’s he covers them with a hand and turns the opposite direction.

“heuning kai! what are you doing in here?”. “bria told me to meet her in here so she could give me the homework that’s due tomorrow. I’m not trying to be a pervert”. gabrielle squats to pick up her belongings, placing her clothes in her hamper and toiletries on her shelf. her heart was pounding through her ears almost but she tried her best to keep calm.

“well, she should’ve told me that. she didn’t tell you she had a roommate?”.

“well it’s common sense that she has a roommate but she made it seem as though you weren’t going to be here”. he says, speaking to the wall. gabrielle folds her arms.

“you know you can uncover your eyes. I’m not naked”. slowly but surely he reveals them, sliding his hand down his face until it was on his lap. their eyes met again, the same heart wrenching stare that they always gave each other at a distance. the one that made gabrielle just want to pass out right then and there. “why do you always do that?”. she mutters breaking the silence between them. “do what?”.

“stare at me. why do you always stare at me like that?”. she swallows nervously, afraid of the answer. “why do you always stare at me like that?”. he replies. she swallows again searching her mind for a response. how the hell does one tell someone that they stare at them because they want to be noticed without sounding too desperate? she didn’t want to sound that way. even though to an extent, she was.

she turns on her heels to place her phone on the charger, figuring maybe if she avoided his gaze she’d be able to think of something. kai licks his lips before he speaks again. “I like looking at pretty things”. by now her hands were practically shaking. she could’ve sworn he hated her by now. “what’s the matter with just telling someone that you think they’re pretty? you don’t think you’re going to look like a creep by just staring at them?”. kai shakes his head no. “whose to say I stare at everyone?”. she reaches into her drawer to grab some pajamas. she couldn’t believe she was even talking to him. “i thought you hated me”. she mutters. “why would I hate you?”. ,

“that night at diamond’s place. you walked off before I could even give you an answer”. kai thinks for a moment. “you made an assumption about me and brushed me off. and I’m not interested in courting girls who don’t want to be courted. so I left you alone”. “whose to say that I didn’t want to be courted?”. she blurted without even thinking. shit. she probably sounded desperate as hell right about now. “so tell me. what’s it going to be? because I’d love to take a pretty girl out on a date tomorrow night”. gabrielle played with her fingernails wanting to pinch herself. or run maybe. either way the question made her just want to curl into a ball and hide. “tell me who the pretty girl is and maybe she’ll provide an answer”. she shortly replies. kai laughs a little. “the pretty girl is you. go on a date with me”.

“mm - how do I know you’re not some serial killer or something?”. kai laughs again and god, how her heart fluttered at his laugh. “wouldn’t I have killed you already? we’ve been in the room alone for almost ten minutes now”. she nods and giggles soon after. “makes sense”.

“so yeah I have a car, maybe you can meet me at the side building tomorrow night? we don’t have to go anywhere far. downtown maybe”. gabrielle shrugs through the fact that she was practically dying inside. “that’s fine. does seven work?”. kai smiles a little. “seven is perfect”.

“damn kai how long you been waiting in here?”. bria marches in, more than late for the time she arranged with him. “since the time you gave me. by the time I turn this assignment in it’s going to be overdue”. bria playfully slaps him on the shoulder before sliding the homework sheet for him to copy out her folder. he laughs and rubs the spot in pain, “thank you mean ass”. she shoos her hand. “yeah whatever. get out my room I’m tired. did you say hi to my roommate on your way in?”. kai continues sliding his jean jacket over his arms before getting up to walk towards the door. he rolls his eyes. “yes I said hi. didn’t i say hi gabrielle?“. he smirks. she tried her best not to smile too hard. “yeah he did. get out like she said though. I’m tired too”. kai laughs and grabs the doorknob, “fine, I’m out”. bria was flipping him off but halfway between him closing the door he gave gabrielle a little smile that made her heart warm, almost as if to say “don’t forget about tomorrow night”.

which gabrielle hadn’t. hell, she straightened her hair hours prior just to prepare. she was happy that bria was out for almost the whole day, leaving her to get ready in peace. she wasn’t quite sure what to wear but she wanted to be comfortable. so instead of wearing a skirt or halter top she settled on a stylish oversized t shirt look with baggy pants and sneakers. and to be a little more girly, she grabbed a small purse. it was weird you know, just leaving her dorm and not having anyone to report to. not having to tell her mother or father that she was going out. not having to explain that she was going out with a boy and not them not having to meet him. it kind of felt nice and it was kind of freeing. she exhales deeply while walking to his car. he was parked where he said he was, in a car that was pretty gorgeous might she add. out of her dorm and now into the passenger seat of his car was an unbelievable feeling. that’s for sure. “you look pretty”. he compliments with a toothy smile that gabrielle couldn’t stop looking at. her cheeks flush deeply. “thank you. heuning”. he laughs at the name and shifts gears preparing to drive. “heuning”. he repeated. “just call me kai”.

“what if i like the sound of heuning?”. he laughs again. “no one does. but, if you do I wouldn’t mind you calling me that. it sounds cute coming from you”. she exhales for the umpteenth time, “please, with the flirting”. she smiles. he was truly killing her on the inside. “where are we going?”.

“shouldn’t that be a surprise? it will ruin the whole date if I told you”.

“how would it ruin the whole date? what if i want to prepare myself?”.

“you will. once we arrive”. she giggles and settles for his answer although she really wanted to know. cutting through her thoughts though was her boyfriend sending her multiple text messages at once. explaining to her how his day went and asking her how was hers. but while on a date he was the last thing she wanted to think about so she switched her phone to silent mode and shoved it back into her purse. “whose that? your boyfriend?”. kai jokes. she sat there with a frozen expression for a while until kai elbows her a little. “it’s just a joke relax”. he laughs. she tries her best to laugh through it when it really kind of scared her. she hadn’t planned on telling him a thing. especially since she really wasn’t obligated to. it wasn’t like heuning was her boyfriend anyways.

out of all places to take her an ice skating rink wasn’t on that checklist. she had no type of coordination, nevertheless skating in a rink full of pros. “have you ever been ice skating before?”. kai asks while slipping the money to the box office worker to pay for their tickets. he gives her a small thank you once she exchanged them. gabrielle shivers a bit, she forgot how cold the rink could be. maybe she shouldn’t have left her jacket in the car. “I have. i wouldn’t say I’m good though”. once their skates were all tied up kai slips his jean jacket off his arms and positions it behind her. “here put this on. you have to be warm when you skate don’t you?”. she shakes her head, “no it’s alright I got it. I think I’ll be fine”. he chuckles. “just put it on. I don’t want you getting a frostbite in here trying to be modest”. she finally gives in allowing him to slide her arms inside of it. it was much more oversized on her and warmer than any jacket she had in her closet. kai eyes the way the sleeves slip past the tips of her fingers, he thought it looked adorable on her.

stepping onto the ice was a brutal nightmare for her. she had no balance and hasn’t been ice skating in almost four years. before she could slip and fall to the ice in embarrassment kai catches her fall and lifts her back to her feet. “baby steps love. do you want to hold my hand maybe?”. her heart sank at the sound of his voice being so overwhelming when he was much closer to her. and as nervous as she was the last thing she wanted to do was fall. so she obliged. she clutched his hand and took glides with him, trying to get the hang of it but it was obvious that she was only surviving because of him. well kind of surviving. once a little boy zoomed past her it went downhill from there. she immediately lost balance and plopped right down on the ice on her butt. “this shit is embarrassing”. she shamefully admits and kai smiles. he squats down to her level and lifts her to her feet again. “it’s alright you just have to try harder.  do you want to hold my hand again coldbutt?”. kai chuckles and holds his hand out for her to grab. she rolls her eyes pretending to be annoyed with him. “not if you’re going to call me that”.

“okay fine. I won’t. come here stop being a baby”.

she takes his hand again and he guides her around the circumference of the rink slowly. she had her hands in front of her just in case though, trying to brace any future falls. “see? just carefully shift your weight around. it’s not that bad”.

“for you it isn’t. I almost died a couple of times. and you laughed”.

“i wasn’t laughing at you I was laughing with you”.

“I wasn’t even laughing!”. she said aloud with a light chuckle at the end of her sentence making kai chuckle as well. “you and bria must have a grand time together with your matching attitudes”.

“oh please. she gets on my nerves sometimes. how do you even know bria anyway? aren’t you a freshman?”.

“sophomore. and I know everyone”. she scoffs. “oh yeah of course. you’re thee heuning kai“. kai hums. “why are you emphasizing my name like that?”. she shrugs. “that’s how everyone else emphasizes it”.

he swallows. “I’m not what everyone says I am”. 

“I figured”. 

“you figured?”. she points. “yeah look at your face. you have too much of a baby face to do anything rebellious”. kai chuckles, “what’s that saying? don’t judge a book by it’s cover?”.

“yeah. I’m just saying. why you single anyway? with all those girls after you”. kai shrugs, gripping her hand a little tighter sensing that she was drifting off and on the verge of falling again. “I don’t want them”. gabrielle makes a pft noise.

“what?”.

“you mean to tell me out of all the thousands of girls that want you, you’re taking interest in absolutely none of them?”. kai looks away for a second before looking back down at her. “I’m taking an interest in you aren’t I?”. gabrielle waddles for a second before standing straight up, trying to glide her feet again. “oh please. who said I even wanted you?”.   

   “why would you be on a date with someone you don’t want?”. she playfully rolls her eyes. “whatever heuning”. he glides in front of her, facing her and skating backwards, holding her hands that way. “how about we do it like this?”. he starts picking up his pace leaving her dragging with him. “wait! slow down a little”. he grins. “the only way you’re going to learn is if you take risks”. she panics. “I’m not playing you’re going to make me bust my ass on this ice”. he grins a little more and completely lets go of her hands skating circles around her making her dizzy and unstable. she tries her best to stay afloat but every time she looked up he was at another angle around her. she laughs. “stop playing! I’m going to fall“. he laughs along with her and continues his 360 circles until she put out a hand in attempt to push him out her way. he instead grabbed her wrists and leans forward so that she was dangling from his back. “come on hop up”. he coaxes, she breathed watching her breath become frost in the wintry air. "I'm too fat for that. please".

“oh shut up”. he hiked her legs up around his waist and dashed around the rink a couple more times, she had to admit it was fun riding on his back like this. more fun than she thought it would be. it was kind of like she was riding on a sleigh of some sort. she was nervous though, she hasn't really been carried by anyone before and it shocked her that heuning didn't care much about her weight. in a way she felt seen. she felt more appreciated. “heuning if we fall I’m beating your ass”. he chuckles. “why would I put you on my back if I knew there was a chance I’d drop you?”. he turns his head to the side to look over his shoulder at her features, never minding the fact that his lips were dangerously close to hers. she melted into the warmth of his eyes. they were pretty. so were his lips. so was his face. his voice was soothing and he was gentle with her. she turned her head the other direction to keep herself from becoming too flustered. “I’m hungry”. she babbles switching the subject of focus.

she begged for the bill but kai refuse to let her pay for her own food. had she known, she would've gotten something cheaper. but nevertheless the black haired boy was pooling out cash to pay for not only his own but her expensive meal as well. he clutches the tray and stuffs his wallet in his back pocket. he shoves one of his fries in his mouth heading towards the table. “are you mad at me coldbutt? I’m not letting you pay for your own food on a date. what kind of gentleman would I be”. he assures with his mouth full. she crosses her arms again pretending to be annoyed at the pet name. it was cute. she just wasn't going to admit that. “heuning i’m not afraid to fight you. you know that?”. he laughs when he sits down across from her. “so aggressive”. she grabs her slushie cup. “thank you though. you’re actually nicer than I thought you’d be”. he chews on another fry. “am I? thank you”. she carefully dips a nacho chip in it’s cheese. “so. heuning kai. if you’re not the person that people portray you to be, who are you?”.  he pulls a couple of napkins out of the dispenser and wipes the excess cheese from the corner of her lips while she chewed. “that’s for gabrielle to find out isn’t it?”. he finished his sentence with a smile so bright it could've blinded her.

and yeah, i guess you could say bria was right. how dumb was gabrielle to come to college with a boyfriend. every time she had a bit of free time she was out, spending it with kai. she felt like she was in high school again, waiting for his texts and swooning over the selfies he often sent her. she thought about him in her passing time. thinking about how she gotten lucky enough to catch a guy like him. as much as she wanted to deny it she was a bit happier too. god, it felt like she was obsessing over some celebrity. she didn’t want to make love and relationships the center of her college life. she came here to study and do well after all. but she couldn’t help herself. 

she scrawls down her biology notes in the cafè with michelle in between classes. she had another class in about an hour or two and she wanted to have some downtime before then. “wait--do you know how to solve this?”. she questions, feeling completely out of focus. michelle eyes her paper and slides it toward herself and nods. she plucks up a pencil so she could show her. the bell at the top of the door chimes and in walks a couple of guys laughing and goofing off with heuning kai following behind. gabrielle’s eyes were soon fixated on his and he notices of course, and gave her a soft smile. she was studying so he didn’t want to go over and bother her. michelle follows her line of sight and scoffs. “gabby are you listening?”. gabrielle nods. “I’m listening I only looked away for one second relax”. she turns her attention back to the paper for a while prior to looking up again, seeing a group of girls surround kai.

he was good looking, it was normal for that to happen. at least that’s what gabrielle was trying to convince herself. but even if she wasn’t fond of the attention he so often got, she had no place to say anything because she wasn’t kai’s girlfriend. he wasn’t required to claim her. technically, he was still on the market. and there was nothing she could do about that.

“I think it could be a good way for you to mingle”. bria spoke in front of the mirror. gabrielle was too lost in her thoughts to listen to her though and once she finally heard the last word of bria’s sentence she jumped. “huh?”. bria turned back to look at her oddly. “girl you okay? you been out of it”. gabrielle sits up and sits her textbook on her lap. “I’m fine. what were you saying?”. “I was inviting you to a party but you seem a little too out of it to come....you sure you alright?”.

“I’m fine I’m just tired. and you know I don’t do parties anyway I already told you that”. bria swings her bag over her shoulder. “well excuse me I was just trying to invite yo-”. cutting through her sentence was a knock at the door. she went to open it and there was kai, hitting her on the head with his homework binder. “bri I need the study guide answers”. she throws a hand on her hip. “when are you going to start doing your own homework? nobody got time to be feeding you sheet after sheet”. she starts going through her drawers and kai rolls his eyes while her back was turned. kai peered over at gabby who in turn was peering over at him. “here. you’re about to make me late”. she handed him the packet and he snatches it playfully giving her a soft thank you. she gives him another eye roll and grabs her phone off her bed. “I’ll be back gabby”. she scurries past kai and out the door leaving him standing there awkwardly in the middle of the room.

“so? how was your day?”. he spoke trying to break the silence. “heuning if you’re going to be into other girls while you’re ‘interested’ in me then we can just stop this”. he exhales, already knowing that was coming. “I’m not into them. I can’t help who approaches me. plus haven’t I told you that I don’t beat around the bush? if i was into someone else I’d just tell you”. he plops down at the edge of her bed. she pushes his thigh with her foot. “whatever”. she turns her body over as if she was preparing to sleep. “aw. you’re jealous?”. he teases. she kicks his thigh a little harder. “stop it heuning”. he rubs her ankles. “my pretty girl is jealous isn’t she?”. she grasps a pillow and hits him over the head with it. he chuckles and caged her body between his arms, hovering over her. she refused to look him in the eyes though. he was much too good looking this close. he twirled his finger around the coils of her hair. “gabrielle. look at me. you know you want to”. he could see the small smile twitch at the corner of her lips. “no I don’t. get out”. he cups her cheek with his hand. “you’re so pretty”. she stifled blushes from rising through her cheeks. she finally turns over with his face just inches from hers. he looked just how she imagined him to be. utterly breathtaking. “I’m sick of you”. she lies, making kai smile. he deposits a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“no you’re not. and if you are that sucks. I wanted to take you out”. she rubbed shapes into his sharp jawline with her thumbs. “hm. where did you want to take me?”. “and why would I tell you that? you’re sick of me remember?”. he teases pretending that he was going to get off of her but she only pulled him back down begging him to stay. “no wait I was just kidding! I was kidding stop”. he laughs at her pleas and takes a glimpse in her eyes. it was moments like this where he enjoyed the silence. the silence that allowed him to admire her in every way that he could. in ways that her boyfriend hadn’t. the butterflies inside her stomach were on a rampage. he leaned in not too far but just enough for her to meet him halfway. he didn’t want to just go for it if she wasn’t onboard. but she was and she meets him with hesitance, shadowing her lips over his. he caressed her cheek with the back of his hand, making the connection of their lips painfully slow. but once they touched, magic was there. electricity sparked through her veins as his lips waltzed upon hers, dissociating her from the world and taking her to another reality. a reality where she was finally living the life she always wanted to live. not being known as the smart chubby girl and finally feeling normal. finally feeling like she deserved a love story of her dreams. whenever he broke away her world shattered. but she was always grateful for him distracting her from life's troubles for that moment.

"you ready to go? love?". he questions while still caressing her.

the burger joint was loud and rowdy but that was expected among college kids. the bar was full with drunk students watching the heated sports games and yelling obnoxiously without reason. gabrielle was grateful that was here at least with kai so it wouldn't bother her much. other than the reprehensible students she enjoyed the vibe of the place. it looked like something straight out of a 90's film with the pink neon glow lights and old license plates and polaroids hanging along the walls. "this place is nice huh?". gabrielle nods across the table from him, dipping her fry in the small cup of ketchup. "yeah it is. how do you find these places on campus?". kai shrugs, taking the tomato off his burger. "when you hang out with upperclassmen they show you the hotspots. I mean other than those drunk ass students over there this place is actually nice". gabrielle laughs. she remembers something. "so? when am I going to find out about you?". kai folds his arms on the table. "you think you still don't know me?".

"no i feel like I don't", she takes a minute to swallow her food, "I think you're too perfect. what's the catch? are you crazy or something?". kai laughs at her accusations. "no I'm not crazy. this is just me. I'm really a genuine guy and I want to start something with you. perhaps a relationship if I could". she hums even though it was kind of inaudible over the roaring music. "why me? that's what really raises a red flag in my head. I remember just a couple of weeks ago, this girl from our philosophy class told me that she was going to ask you out and she told me not to tell anyone. I guess what I'm trying to say is, why not her? why not the others". kai waits until his food was chewed and swallowed before he spoke. "what is with you and these others? I told you I don't want them. and the girl you're talking about is clara. she asks everyone out if you haven't noticed. I'm surprised she hasn't asked you out yet". gabrielle laughs a bit. "I'm sorry It's just I'm not the best looking and I know that. so in my mind me and you just don't make sense". he takes a sip of his milkshake. "gabrielle stop it. you're beautiful and I'm attracted to you. you make perfect sense". her cheeks began to flush but she ignored them of course. "well riddle me this because I'm curious. what do you want out of life heuning?". he gives a half smile and adjusts his seating. "I want love".

"love?".

"yes. why are you shocked?".

"most guys want you know, to be famous. to have lots of money. a big ass mansion somewhere. sexy super model ass wife. a pitbull or two".

"that sounds nice. but is it fulfilling though?".

"well...I'd think so".

"most guys want that because they want their ego to be stroked in every aspect of their life. there's highs and lows in life but they don't want to see the low of anything. no one wants to, really. but you have to. and when you put your ego first before everything, you become nothing. while a garage full of expensive cars and a mansion on a mountain side sounds nice, those things get old. I want something that never gets old. something that's timeless. like love". gabrielle's heart flutters and she got lost in the sea of his eyes again. "so above all else, love is what you aim for?". he nods. "i want to love someone the way I wish someone loved me". there was a swift moment of silence before he spoke again. "how about you? what do you want out of life?". she thoughtlessly shakes her head. "I don't even know how to respond to the question anymore after you said that. I'm very much questioning my morality now". he laughs. "what? did you want money and cars and a hot wife?". he jokes while dipping a fry into honey mustard. before gabrielle could answer she was interrupted by a drunk girl, approaching the table and grabbing the hem of kai's sweater before she sat beside him. "i m-missed yoooou kai", she pouts and leans in, giving him clumsy kisses along his neck. he annoyingly pushes her off. "jessica get off me. you're drunk and you need to go home". she pouts her lips again. "when are you coming back to me?". gabrielle was grateful for another guy reaching for the girl's wrists and helping her out the seat. he seemed to be her much sober friend. "come on we're leaving. leave them alone". she blew kai kisses before she staggered away.

gabrielle kept silent while taking a bite of her burger and wiping her face shortly after. kai only stared at her, sensing that she may have felt some type of way about the situation. "look, she's just an ex. I haven't been seeing her at all". she swallows. "I know, heuning. I'm not angry". that's what she said, but kai felt otherwise. he reaches his hand across the table just to intertwine his fingers with hers. "come on. let's ditch this place I got something to show you". she furrows a brow. "this late at night?". he took out his wallet and pooled out some cash to stamp on the table for their meals. "yeah. it's hilarious trust me".

with the utmost confusion gabrielle takes his lead and his word for it. the campus was rather dark at night with a light here and there but lights were often hard to come by. this is what made gabrielle the most scared while she was running through the woods in the darkened quads with kai, with him tugging on her wrist egging her on. "heuning slow down! I'm scared what if I fall?". she whispered with her heart racing and all she could hear was the leaves and twigs snapping beneath her and kai's moving feet. he chuckles. "you're not going to fall stop being a scaredy cat. we're almost there". she tried to ignore every ounce of fear she withheld until they were finally approaching a small light at the side of a building. she was still catching her breath while she was nearing what looked to be a small window low at the base of the building. kai was crouching down right beside it, waving her over and pushing his index finger to his lips to silence any further noise she made. "I'm about to fucking die". she gasps for air and kai shushes her again to point to the window.

she peaks her head in just a tad bit to see a security guard in the back of an empty library at his desk on the computer. gabrielle shrugs her shoulders. "you made me run through the fucking woods just to show me this?". kai laughs and points again. "no look. look at the computer screen". gabrielle takes another look and scrunches her eyes a bit. her heart dropped at what she saw and she immediately tucked her head into kai's chest in disgust. "ew! that's so fucking digusting". kai laughed at her reaction as quiet as he could. "this old guy watches all kinds of shit. felching porn is his favorite". she shivered at the thought. "I just don't see what's arousing about seeing someone suck semen through a straw out of someone else's ass". kai shrugs and peers through the window again. "to each their own I guess?". she fixed her lips to reply but felt something crawling along her leg and she panicked, she gripped kai's shirt. "heuning! something is on me something is fucking on me". he looked down at her body but it was hard to see any creepy crawlers due to the lack of lighting around. "calm down calm down, I don't really see anything". whatever bug it was had quickly made it's way into the palm of her hand and it felt abnormally large and furry. she freaked out, flailing her body around and in turn kicked the window, gaining the attention of the security guard who quickly closed the tab and got up hastily to go outside and chase after them. "oh shit! come on". kai shrieked pulling her upwards to her feet and tugging her through the woods once again. by now she was wiping her hand on the pants of her jeans running as fast as she could go wanting to just pass the hell out.

sweat trickled down her forehead and she struggled to breathe. after moments of running they were finally out in the open in the quads, which was a terrible mistake because their movement set the sprinklers off. she wanted to get agitated but she couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous kai looked trying to block the projectile shooting water from hitting him when his body was already drenched. "heuning stop you look like an idiot". his hand was still in hers when his feet slipped on the wet grass underneath an oak tree, causing their wet bodies to fall on top of one another. they breathlessly laughed at their efforts of trying to get up but eventually slipping due to how wet the grass and the bottom of their shoes actually were. normally gabrielle would get mad about wetting some of her favorite clothes and wetting her hair even. but for some reason she didn't care. kai sat up on his elbows once he finished laughing, taking a minute to admire her even in the messy, muddy condition that she was in. she removes her glasses trying find a dry part of her shirt to dry them with and he strings his hand through her tangled hair. "you look like a beautiful disaster". he commented with a small grin. she blushes trying not to smile. "yeah well, it's your fault anyway. had me watching an old guy beat his dick to felching porn". kai laughs and pulls her in so that her face was adjacent to his own. he brushed his thumb over the tiny water droplets on her cheeks and waited for her lips like he always had. she got lost again. swept into the sea of his eyes and the heat of the moment, clashing her lips onto his once again.

"girl look, there he goes again". her seatmates jeers in philosophy, watching kai enter the room like she always had. gabrielle continues doodling. "you say that shit everyday. give it a rest". she starts eagerly tapping gabrielle in excitement, "oh shit he's coming over here". by the time gabrielle looked up she saw kai standing in front of her, smiling, plopping his things into the seat right beside hers. it took everyone by shock, gabrielle knew it even though no one had quite said anything. but she knew they were surprised that he was sitting beside someone else today. a girl in particular. "why are you looking at me all weird?". he grins before sitting. "I wasn't expecting you to sit next to me". he dug around in his bag for his utensils and notebooks. he was wearing a black oversized zipper hoodie and a graphic band t shirt. looking just as attractive as he did any other day. "I can't sit next to you? were you saving this seat for your other lovers?". when he said that it made her mind resort to her boyfriend, whom she hasn't texted in a while. she quickly shook the thought out of her mind though and playfully punches kai's shoulder. "oh shut up. you're the only one with other lovers here". kai laughs, "see now you shut up". professor witman finally arrives and sits his things on the desk at the front of the room like he always had. he began speaking briefly about the reading from last night. kai rests his head on his hand. half paying attention to what the professor was saying and half sneaking glances at gabrielle, whose beauty he admired so much.

"girl are you and kai... a thing?". her seatmate whispers discreetly. gabrielle didn't quite know how to respond to that. she keeps a blank expression. "something like that, I guess you could say". she responds but still unsure if that was the right answer either. kai nudges her. "so? you and me tonight at my dorm? what you think?". gabrielle was still doodling along the edges of her pages. "I think it's time that I catch up on my chemistry notes once and for all. that's what I think".

"well after you catch up? take your time it's no rush. my roommate is going to be out for the night so. maybe we can watch movies?".

he raised his intonation like a kid convincing their mom to buy them candy at a candy store. it was adorable to say the least. needless to say, she was at his dorm like he asked that night with no further questions. it was kind of fun being out often to be honest. it gave her a break from her studies at least. entering kai's room though was something she never thought she'd be doing throughout her whole four years here. but here she was, plopping on his bed and gazing around at the posters and decals he had plastered on his side of the room. it was pretty neat to be honest. organized too. "you like it?". he questions while standing in front of the tv with the remote controller in his hand. he was switching through the selection of films. "yeah. to be an active student here your room is actually clean". kai chuckles with his eyes still fixated on the tv screen. "what are you trying to say? that I'm dirty?". she pushes her glasses up a little. "no but--the fact that you have time to keep it neat while doing everything you do. I expected it to be a little messier than this at least".

"you really think I'd invite a pretty girl in my room and leave it messy? you're crazy". gabrielle hums, "so what are we going to watch?". kai grins. "I should make you watch something sappy like the notebook". gabrielle scoffs. "please heuning. let's watch something funny". kai continues flipping until he finally settled on dumb and dumber. he sits the remote down and walks to the bed, grabbing the pizza boxes off his nightstand and sitting them between them. "you can eat as much as you want. I think I bought a little too much". she opens the box and laughs. "boy I'm not about to sit here and scarf down all this pizza. I have enough weight that I have to lose". kai chews into a slice. "where?". she deadpans him before gesturing towards her tummy. “right here. you don’t have to act like you don’t see it. it’s okay”.

“well, I don’t. you think every time I look at you I’m thinking about your weight?”.

“yeah. chubbier people have anxiety when it comes to our weight”.

“I think you look fine. And I’m never looking at you like that so don’t worry. eat all you want”.

“I’m going to throw this pizza at your face”.

kai chuckles at her response. “what? why? why are you so aggressive?”.

“you’re sweet. I don’t know how to respond other than being aggressive. I don’t want the moment to get too soft”.

“just kiss me”.

“heuning, that’s a soft response”.

“I know I just want a kiss from you”. he admits, she thought it was kind of cute the way he asked. “maybe when we’re finished eating”. kai held her to that though and made sure she cuddled with him as soon as they were finished just so he could get the promised kisses. his chest was comfy and warm, and she always felt safe in his grip.

she thought for a moment. “heuning?”.

“hm?”. he hummed with his eyes still fixed on the tv screen. she toys with his hoodie strings. “give me three confessions about yourself. go”. he chuckles but kindly obliged. “okay well 1. I hate math. 2. I have a horrible ‘losing my virginity story’ and 3. I think I’m actually a very lonely person”. gabrielle laughs and perched her head up just to look at him. “okay the first one I understand. but you’re lonely and your first time didn’t go good?”.

“yeah. I mean I have friends and everything but. I just feel like I’m not fully connected with them sometimes. feel like we’re all just there to entertain each other. and as for my first time, well. that shit was a nightmare”.

“I feel you. I know the feeling. It kind of feels like you’re just floating. but I guess that comes with growing up. you just have to find your people. don’t think that I’m not going to ask you to share your story though. I’m curious”.

kai laughs. “you’re right I guess I do have to find my people. so far, I think you’re my person”.

“do you mean that or are you just saying that to distract me from telling me the story?”.

“no I’m serious”.

“well I think you’re my person too heuning”.

kai scoffs, “pft. heuning”.

“hey you said I can call you that. and tell me the story please”. kai playfully groans. “no it’s too embarrassing”.

“it can’t be that bad”.

“how about this? if you tell me yours I’ll tell you mine?”. she reaches up to cup his cheek. “how am I going to tell you mine when I don’t have one?”. kai breathes and brushes his thumb over the back of her hand. “you’re precious gabrielle”. she hums while swimming in his eyes again. “why? because I’m a virgin?”.

“no. you’re just pure. I think it’s precious. don’t let anyone pressure you into doing it alright? It’s okay to wait”. gabrielle nods in a daze. “everyone always says that shit. wait until you’ve found the right person. but how would you even know whose the right person. what if you do it and then things don’t work out with them and then you find the right person later on in life”. kai thinks for a moment. “I think it’ll just happen without thought”. gabrielle chuckles. “don’t be cheesy”. he smiles. “I’m not being cheesy I’m just saying. you’re always being mean to me”.

“aw? are you getting sensitive?”. she playfully mocked like kai always did. “no I’m not I’m just saying”. she walks her fingers up his chest teasingly. “my heuning is sensitive for me isn’t he?”. Kai looked rather cute when he was blushing. a red hue splotched around his cheeks. “I’m not sensitive”. she perks her lips up to peck him on the cheeks which he greatly appreciated since he loved her kisses dearly. they made his heart flutter. “kiss me again”. he begged.

“and just where the hell have you been?”. Bria asked finally seeing gabrielle come into their room after her morning shower. “I’ve been here. you the one that’s been going out. that’s why you don’t see me”. Bria gives her the best ‘yeah right’ grin. she continues tidying up her side of the room. “well since you don’t be doing anything diamond is having people over at her suite again. same crowd. you should come through this time”. gabrielle looks in her wardrobe to find some clothes. she felt kind of weary. “honestly I’m beat. I need to nap or something before I do anything else. I don’t know if I can go”. wait. if it was the same crowd that meant kai was going to be there. she quickly changed her mind. “I’ll try to make it though”. Bria tosses one of her dresses in her hampers. “good. I’m glad you’re being more open to going out”. well she really wasn’t. just more open to going wherever kai was. when she arrived he was sitting on the couch in the living room conversing with a few of his friends. everyone was sporadic as usual, either in the kitchen drinking, in the living room, playing games somewhere, or upstairs. kai was more than happy to see her especially when she plopped down on the couch right beside him.

Bria eyed the way he smiled at her and she grinned. “oop don’t get yourself caught up kai! she has a boyfriend you know”. she blurts while making her way upstairs. gabrielle’s heart dropped and her eyes widened. she was lucky no one else in the room knew what was going on so they continued with their festivities. but kai’s smile disappeared. “what is she talking about?”. she tried to wave it off. “that’s just bria. you know she be saying anything”. the cold look that he gave her right after that line made her world stop. “gabrielle? what is she talking about?”. she swallows before responding. she knew she had to tell the truth or things would be much worse. “I kind of.. have a boyfriend heuning but -“.

“kind of have a boyfriend? what the hell does kind of have a boyfriend mean? how long have you had a boyfriend?”. kai looked sweet when he was smiling but god, when he’s angry he’s lethal. his sharp stare could split her in two. “we’ve been dating since high school”. he clenched his jaw. “so you’ve had a boyfriend this whole entire time? and you didn’t bother telling me? so what were you trying to play me or something?”. she quickly grew nervous. “no it isn’t like that I was going to break up with him I swear”. she tried to explain herself but he was already getting up, making his way out of the house with a slamming door.

good. she felt like complete shit. this is exactly what she needed. she didn't mean for it to all happen like this. she was really going to break up with him but it was hard doing that to someone you've been in a relationship with for years. the party for gabrielle was essentially ruined. she didn't even want to be there anymore. well, she didn't really want to be anywhere anymore. kai hadn't responded to her texts and calls for days on end. even when she apologized. and even when she lied and said she broke up with her boyfriend. nothing worked. seeing him in the quads was quite different now, he didn't make eye contact with her even when she tried to make it with him. instead he continued talking to his friends, continuing on whatever conversations he was having. while they were in the library michelle could sense that gabrielle was a little more off than usual. she finally laid her pencil down and addressed her. "alright gabby. what's the matter?". gabrielle continued writing with her attention on her paper. "nothing I'm fine".

"oh please. you've been more down than usual lately. what happened? what did kai do?".

"he didn't do anything. it's my fault".

"your fault? what did you do?".

"he found out I had a boyfriend".

"gabby? you didn't tell him that?".

"it's not that easy michelle. I wasn't expecting all of this shit to happen. hell, I wasn't even expecting kai to even ask me out".

"you've been hanging with kai for weeks now. you don't think you had time to tell him in between any of those times?".

she deadpans her. "how do you have time to tell someone that? in the middle of dates you think I'm just like hey I really like hanging with you and I'm starting to like you but I have a boyfriend".

"you could've said something. you have his number right? you could've made it easier on yourself and said it through a text message or something".

"but I was planning on breaking up with him. i swear I was".

"either way you should've told him".

gabrielle sighs. shit. she should've. michelle was right. but how would the timing ever be right to tell someone that? her mind was swarming with ideas for how she could resolve everything. she waited patiently after philosophy class. even though her heart was practically pounding through her eardrums she exhaled before she approached him down the hallway. for the first time he didn't smile when he saw her. he looked at her as if she was every other girl that approached her.

"what do you want gabrielle?".

"heuning. I'm sorry. that was wrong of me to just continue on with this without telling you. i wasn't trying to be two timing I just didn't know how I was going to do it. when I'm with you I don't think about him, i forget about him".

"I'm glad then. this time away is probably finally getting you to remember him again?". he spoke calmly while walking away, out of the doors of the building and to the parking lot where his car was. gabrielle followed.

"it's not like that. why the hell would I try to play you? after all you've confided in me, why would I play with your feelings like that?".

"why don't you ask yourself that question?". he pulled open his car door.

"you're acting stupid as shit right now. for real. you should basically know me by now. I would never intentionally do something like that to you".

"why would you go on a date with me if you knew you had a boyfriend? huh? when I first asked you, you knew full well you were with someone. all of this could've been avoided if you told me the truth".

"go on a date?". a familiar voice repeated behind her. she quickly turned her head to see her boyfriend, noah.

"noah what are you doing here?".

"I drove up here thinking that since it's been a while, I should take you out or spend some time with you. I didn't think you'd be up here seeing somebody else".

"noah it's not like that I swear to god. we have to talk".

"this is what you wanted to happen right gabrielle? you didn't want to break up with him and you didn't want to tell me so you got what was coming to you. go deal with that. I have problems of my own to deal with". and with that kai got in his car, pulling off and driving away before gabrielle could say anything else. she shamefully turned back to noah who looked so disappointed that it actually broke her heart.

"you promised me that even while you were away your love wouldn't stop for me. and then you go do this shit. I'm done gabrielle".

"my love didn't stop for you".

"you don't do that to people you claim you love. I hope you're enjoying it here". she stretched her arm to grab his wrists but he shrugged her off and walked back to his car, leaving her feeling absolutely stupid by herself. her face felt extremely hot on her way back to her dorm and she didn't want to look up because she already knew her eyes were rimming with tears.

"girl? you alright? what's wrong?". upon entry bria could already sense that someone was off. and since gabrielle was in the comfort of her room now she figured she might as well let her tears fall. "you remember that night you told kai that I had a boyfriend?". bria nods before a lightbulb went off in her head. she covers her mouth. "gabby. don't tell me he didn't know. ya'll was talking?".

"yes. we've been hanging out for a while now and we've been into each other. I didn't tell him about noah. so when you said that it pissed him off. he didn't talk to me for days and then finally today when I confronted him, noah decides to show up and overhear us. he broke up with me. and now kai wants nothing to do with me because he thinks I was two timing him".

out of guilt bria pulls her roommate in for a hug. "I swear I didn't know I'm sorry that's my bad. why didn't you tell me you and kai was talking? you know I joke around a lot. I wouldn't have said shit if he didn't know".

"I was scared to tell you because I knew you would tease me about it and to be honest I was just ashamed of the fact that you were right. I shouldn't have came to college with a boyfriend if I've never really been on the dating scene before. when kai asked me out I didn't think about any of that shit".

"girl. this is a mess and is one of the reasons why I don't deal with men and their attitudes. and if it makes you feel any better I could understand why you didn't think about noah when kai asked you out. that boy is fine as hell".

gabrielle playfully punched her in the arm with a small laugh. "shut up bria. I know and I feel bad. like why would I play kai? who in their right mind would play kai?".

bria curls her glossed lips into a small smirk. "aw? you're in love with kai? aren't you?".

gabrielle ignores her to keep from blushing. " this is not the time. I just got broken up with".

bria laughs and tugs on gabby's cheeks. "aw my gabby is in love! I'm so mad that you didn't tell me about this. how did this all even happen?".

"I'd tell you if I wasn't in shambles. he probably doesn't even want to talk to me anymore".

"girl bye. I don't date men anymore but trust me when I did, one thing I learned is that if they like you they'll never leave you alone. that boy is just a little mad now. he's not going to stay mad forever".

gabrielle moves a pillow to the other side of her bed. "yeah, well. until then I'm just going to go to sleep. I need a nap after this shit".

"aw. well I'm going to get some food later. you want me to bring you back anything?".

gabrielle shakes her head no while clutching a pillow, ready to drift off. she wasn't keeping track of how long she slept but she just wanted to sleep long enough to where she could forget about everything. or at least to where everything didn't hurt as much. when she woke up her forehead was clammy and her room was dark, not a sign of bria anywhere. she figured she stayed over at diamond's. she turns the lamp on beside her bed and was greeted by a food tray container sitting on her nightstand. she didn't know what was in it but she was grateful for bria. maybe she wasn't as obnoxious as gabrielle made her seem.

she couldn't eat though, not right now at least. she couldn't stop thinking about what happened earlier which kind of pissed her off since she thought sleep could lessen the blow. but her heart ached just as much as it did when she was awake. she thought about what bria said. she's right. if kai liked her then there was no way he could stay angry. with that being said gabrielle discarded every bit of fear she had and threw on more comfortable clothes and made her way to his dorm. it was late so she wasn't expecting him to answer but she hoped he would. she knocked softly and her heart pounded with each knock. she didn't know what he would do or even say if he saw her.

to her surprise there was light shuffling behind the door before it opened, revealing kai in an oversized grey hoodie and messy hair. his face was flushed and he looked as though he were crying too. but she didn't want to make any assumptions. he folded his arms, not expecting to see her at his door at all. "what? what do you want?".

"I know you've probably heard this one thousand times from me but heuning I'm sorry. honestly. what I did was shitty. I should've told you. I only didn't because like I said, when I'm with you I don't think about noah, or anyone else for that matter. when I first moved into this school me and noah made a promise that even while I was away we'd stay together. so when I got here i had no expectations of being interested in someone else. but you make me feel things I've never felt before and I didn't know how I was going to tell him that I fell in love with someone else. I'm in love with you. and I'll admit that". she croaked. she didn't want to cry. no-- she was going to try and stay strong. kai starts swiping her tears away with his thumbs.

"don't cry gabrielle. i wasn't doing any of that to hurt you but I was angry because I thought you were trying to hurt me", he presses a kiss into her forehead. "I'm in love with you too". he pulls her in for a warm hug. "cmon. I have a place where we can go to blow off all of this".

and when he said that gabrielle didn’t think he meant the empty recreation center where the swimming pool and gyms were. once he brought her in and shredded his shirt he dived in the deep end in the shorts he already had on, then swam to the shallow end where gabrielle was standing there poolside with her arms folded, grinning at him. he shook his wet hair and combed it back with his fingers. the pool room was warm and she felt comfort in the fact that it was just them two in there.

“heuning are we even supposed to be here?”.

“why would they leave the door open if we couldn’t? I come here all the time. mainly at night where I can be alone. just to clear my head sometimes. you should come in with me”.

“I’m wearing a hoodie and sweatpants. I’m not prepared to get in. plus I can’t even swim. don’t worry though I’ll just watch you from the pool chairs”.

“just wear my shirt. It’s not scary I promise. plus this water is warm”. gabrielle stood for a moment in thought. he could tell she was still trying to decide. “please? I’ll teach you”.

she swipes his shirt off the ground and playfully rolls her eyes. “fine heuning. fine. turn around”. he smiled at that and turned his body, waiting for her to give him the signal that she was done changing. once she had though he marveled over her features as soon as he turned back around. he hated the fact that she was self conscious about her body. especially when he loved every part of her, and every part of cellulite and series of stretch marks that came with it. his oversized shirt dangled just above her knees and she stood there shyly.

“why are you staring at me like that?”.

“because you’re beautiful”. he walked to the pool stairs and held his hand out for her to grab. she did so and felt her body shudder a little at the sudden contact with water. it was easy to get used to since it was fairly warm. they were already at four feet but she was already getting anxiety thinking about sinking underneath the water.

“we can stay here if you want. we don’t have to go to the deep end”. kai informed leaning back, letting himself float on top of the water. “how do you do that?”.

“what? float? just lay back and relax”.

gabrielle thought about it and positioned her body to do it but she quickly got frightened feeling her head almost sink into the water. kai clutched her body just in time. he was holding her bridal style just at the brim of the water.

“relax. don’t think about anything”.

“I’ll try not to think about how a cute boy is holding me right now”.

“and while I’m holding you I’ll try not think about how a cute girl is swimming in my shirt”.

“other than the fact that it’s clinging to my body right now it’s kind of comfy. I think I’ll keep it”.

“go ahead. there’s plenty more where that came from”.

“sounds like I need to go shopping in your closet?”.

“you’d probably wear my clothes better than me”. kai smiles. “look. you’re doing it and I’m barely touching you”. her eyes widened with excitement.

“wait I’m doing it? Oh my god I’m floating!”. he laughs. “calm down before you sink. you’re supposed to stay relaxed remember?”.

"I'm relaxed I'm just excited!". her voice bellowed off the pool room walls and soon she began to quickly submerge in the water with her frequent movements. she hadn't sunk that deep, maybe a couple of inches or two but water still filled her nose and lungs when she breathed it all in. kai panicked and lifted her out the water and threw her over his shoulder, he walked to sit her on the pool ledge so she could take a break from the water. she was coughing and her nose burned a shit ton, she mentally vowed to never do it again. kai pats her back and consoles her, wondering how everything even happened so fast. "you have to be careful baby I told you to relax". he consoles. yeah, she was still trying to get her eyes to focus on earthly things but her ears were open enough to hear the pet name. she got butterflies when she was finally feeling well enough to look down into his eyes.

"what?".

she shook her head, implying that it was nothing. "you called me baby".

"yeah. because you're my baby".

she blushed. "I am? without permission? you didn't even ask me".

he gives her a gentle smile, taking her hand and hugging her torso from the middle of her legs. "gabrielle? do you want to be my baby?".

"yes. yes I'd love that".

he smiles again, the smile that she loved. there wasn't a delay in the kiss that he gave her, it was swift and smooth and he held her close enough to where the world around her blurred and suddenly there was no noise. just the beating of their hearts together, hopelessly, cynically in love.

after swimming she didn't want to leave him. maybe she found herself a bit attached but she didn't care and neither did he.

"I know you're devising a plan to steal my hoodies so. I might as well donate some to you while you're here". gabrielle shuts the door behind her looking over at the vacant bed across from his. "where's your roommate?". kai digs around his closet. "he's probably at some party or spending the night somewhere". he turns and throws a hoodie at her chest and she catches it promptly. she turned to the mirror and pulled it over her head to see how it would fit. firstly, it smelled just like heuning so she was already starting to love it even if it fit a little big. she turned to the side and posed so she could see different angles of herself as she did with every new article of clothing she had. she didn't notice kai lowkey watching from the side in admiration and amusement. she was adorable in his clothes.

her heart dropped when he appeared behind her. she was too busy thinking about the things she could wear with the hoodie she completely forgot that she was even in his room. he smiles sweetly at her through the mirror. "you look so cute". it was hard for gabrielle to keep trying to hide her reddening cheeks so this time she embraced it. she embraced him. she embraced the fact that no matter what she thought she looked like, kai would always see her differently. she embraced the way he embraced her. "thank you heuning". she mutters, meeting his stare. it wasn't a creepy stare but rather wholesome, he saw paradise in her eyes even if it was through a reflective piece of glass. for the first time in his life he felt something. he felt a connection. and she felt his hands encompassing her waist and his lips sprinkling soft, heedful kisses along the expanse of her neck. gabrielle drew in a sharp breath, observing it all through the mirror ahead. she reaches her hand up and allowed it to entangle in the damp curly strands of his hair. her head tilts back a bit further, giving him the opportunity to kiss the places that he abandoned. her heart was pounding but she no longer cared. the butterflies in her stomach was wrecking her much harder. she tilted her head back enough for him to look into her eyes again before swooping in for a delicate kiss that rippled fireworks through their veins. they were stuck like that for a while, enveloping in each other's warmth while their lips moved en masse. it was was one foot after the other until they fell onto the bed, giving themselves to the ardent love that they were yearning for.

when gabrielle awoke the next morning she faintly remembered falling asleep on kai’s chest but it was hard to remember much of anything with the yelling that was ringing through her ears. her eyes flickered open to see that she wasn’t cuddled with Kai anymore but instead gripping a pillow, and kai was at the door arguing with some girl whom she couldn’t see.

“can you quiet down? you’re being too loud”. kai exclaimed, wanting to just shut the door on Jessica’s face.

“no! no I’m not lowering my fucking tone for what?! you need to hear me. shit everyone does. you’ve taken this too far! you need to tell her already!”.

at the sound of her words gabrielle leaned up a bit rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “tell me what? heuning? what’s going on what is she talking about?”.

when kai looked back at her a guilty expression was drawn across his face. he looked as if he wanted to say something, he just didn’t know how. “It’s nothing gabrielle”. Jessica pushes his room door open and storms past him, approaching the bed where gabrielle was. “Jessica stop”. kai warned. but she ignored him and gave gabrielle an angry gaze anyway.

“kai never liked you. he never wanted to date you or any of that shit. since you rejected him the first time he made a bet with his friends that he could get you to fall in love with him and then sleep with you. all this shit is a lie”.

gabrielle clutched the blankets with her stomach churning and hands growing clammy. the walls around her seemed as if they were closing in and there was a large lump in her throat. she darts her eyes over at kai who was still wearing the same guilty expression from earlier. “heuning? what the fuck is she talking about? is it true?”.

“gabrielle”.

“tell me the fucking truth heuning kai”.

he swallows, just wanting to disappear. “it was true at first but—“.

before he could continue she felt sick to her stomach. she was upset beyond measure and instead of staying and listening to another lie she throws on her shoes and grabs her clothes, making her way out of the residence hall and into the quads. such a bright warm day contrasted the way she was feeling. her body was on fire and she didn’t know if whether she wanted to cry or go completely numb. she knew she probably looked stupid staggering through the crowded quad full of students in the midst of their Saturday festivities. gabrielle couldn’t even make it fully out the quad until she felt lightheaded and fell to her knees, puking her feelings onto the blades of grass. she couldn’t believe him. she couldn’t believe he would do something like that to her.

she hadn’t known that he followed her, stopping at a distance once he saw her throwing up. “gabrielle none of that shit is true anymore. here let me help you”. he reached his hand out but she spoke quickly with her stomach heaving. “don’t you fucking touch me heuning kai”. she wipes her mouth and dizzily stands to her feet, giving him the deadliest stare he ever saw in his life. fear and guilt washed over him. “gabrielle you have to believe me”. she draws a hand back and gifts him a stinging slap across his face. one so loud that it drew the attention of everyone surrounding them. kai was stunned, shocked even. he held his cheek in pain.

“that was such an asshole move I should’ve known. I was told to stay away from you and that you’re nothing but trouble but I decided to give you a chance because I thought that’s all that you probably needed. a chance to show someone who you really are but now I fucking know who you are. a lying piece of shit who doesn’t give a damn about anyone but himself”.

“gabrielle—“. he tries to grab her wrist but she swiftly pulls away. “I fucking gave myself to you. that’s something I vowed to do only when I felt like the timing was just right and you took advantage of that didn’t you? you got a kick out of knowing that I was a virgin freshman didn’t you? you’re such a bitch it isn’t even funny”.

“no you didn’t let me finish it was true at first I’ll admit that. I’ll admit I’m an asshole for even devising a plan like that but all of that changed once I met you gabrielle. I fucking forgot about the plan. I meant everything I’ve ever said to you. I want you and I’m so in love with you I can’t even put it into words. please. you have to believe me. I’m sorry”.

she shook her head in annoyance, unable to even withstand the sight of his face.

“fuck you, heuning kai”. she made those words her last before she turned on her heels to cut through the crowd, vowing to never speak to him ever again.

#heuning kai #heuning kai fluff #heuning kai angst #tomorrow x together #netflix fanfic

[mystaracrosstheuniverse]

Last Piece 2.

title. Last Piece pairing. GOT7 JB x Reader genre. slice of life, romance, attempts at comedy, angst warnings. cursing, jb being a cute cat dad, reader is hella awkward but so is he, mentions of anxiety, GOT7 members being hella extra bc they are summary. As an English teacher from abroad, you get a lot of perks. One of the best ones is that you live in an apartment for free. Another perk seems to be the elusive, attractive man who lives two floors above you… Though his cats seem to prefer your apartment over his. And so does his mail, which makes you travel to his place pretty often regardless of whether he wants to see you or not.

new beginnings master post.

part one. part two.

______________________________________________________________

Ever since that first package drop off, you’ve run into Jaebum quite a few times. Living in the same building and occasionally getting each other’s mail definitely attributed to the frequency, and you were thankful for it. While you’re sure the male wouldn’t really consider the two of you friends, you liked to call him a “not quite but almost friend”... Not to his face but to your own friends and to yourself. Maybe occasionally to his cats. Speaking of his cats, you’ve met more than just Odd and Nora at this point. Nora seemed to be the jealous type, wanting her dad’s attention to herself, and would push the younger ones out of the apartment as Jaebum would come and go. The amount of times you’ve found Odd or Kunta wandering around the hall made you wonder how the man didn’t ever notice his oldest child bullying her siblings.  Other times he gets your mail, having it been delivered to him on accident somehow. You’d never live down the time he got a huge package from your grandparents, an amused smirk across his face as he brought it to you.  “Forget some things back home?” He had teased, setting the package down on your counter. Your face was bright red, unable to string together a coherent sentence because you didn’t want him to think you were forgetful, but then again you kind of were but what if -- “Hey, I’m just teasing, Y/N.” He had said, gentler this time, “I know it must be nice to have someone back home who cares about you.”  You had just nodded, your heartbeat evening out slowly as you chatted for a few more minutes before he hurried off. He was a bit gentler for a few days after, as if scared to get that reaction out of you again. You appreciated it. You hoped that one day you’d be able to not have that instant reaction to panic over a small comment. Since then, you’ve been trying to gather up the courage to ask if he wants to hang out for lunch or something. Every time you get close, you end up chickening out. And every time you cursed yourself, because you just wanted to be his friend -- something about him made you want to be around him. Today, though, you just wanted to get to work. You had planned a big interactive activity for your class today and you wanted to make sure everything was perfect. Hurrying down the stairs, you made sure you had everything in your bag before leaving the building. As you looked up, you noticed someone just barely walking ahead of you. Jaebum. Immediately your mind went through possible scenarios, from saying hello to quietly avoiding him, maybe even -- “Do you want to get lunch or something later Jae???” Oh no. Oh no. Your mouth decided for you. Not only that, you addressed him so casually even though he’s older, he’s definitely going to hate you -- Was... that a laugh? You focused her attention back on him, seeing him looking amused and a half smile on his face. You ignored the small catch in your throat and pushed away the thought of how nice he looked.  “Sure, give me your phone and we’ll plan something.” You don’t even remember handing over your device or him adding himself to your contacts, but a few minutes later he gave you a little finger salute and a promise to message you later for planning.  “Im Jaebum” the contact read in kakaotalk, simple and to the point, much like the man you were hoping to befriend. As you mentally patted yourself on the back for not crying, you glanced at the time on your phone before cursing loudly in your native language and running off to the subway. You were going to be late.  Despite you thinking that you totally had your excitement under control, your co-teacher and students definitely thought otherwise.  “Teacher, why can’t you sit still? Don’t you ... much sit down?” Sangmin, one of your fourth graders, attempted to ask. You smiled and gently corrected him, saying you liked to sit down very much, but don’t ‘always’ do it. He bashfully nodded and bowed his head down to talk with his desk partner about the dialogue you’d given out for discussion. “They’re right you know,” You jumped before recognizing the voice of your co-teacher, Taeyeon, “You’re acting like you’ve drank the Ediya shop out of stock.”  Oh. Perhaps you were flitting about the room more, babbling a little to yourself and to your students, and constantly looking over at your desk where you kept your phone while class was in session.  “I just... I made a friend.” You admitted, “You know, the guy from my apartment building?”  Taeyeon raised an eyebrow, looking at you skeptically. “I know I’ve asked this, but you sure you don’t like him more than a friend? It’s not like we’re not friends and you don’t have friends, Y/N.”  See you KNEW this but one of your biggest anxieties and fears was that you’d never be able to make friends outside of work or your past. Because, like Christian had always reassured you, you were a wonderful sweetheart but you were so hard to talk to because you were always so nervous. It made it hard.  “I really just want to meet his cats... Except Nora because she seems mean.” You noted, not really answering the question but in your mind, it was sufficient. Having worked with you and had recently made herself your friend, Taeyeon knew this was probably the best she was going to get out of you and just left it be. You’d figure it out eventually and she knew she’d be one of the first to know. She still couldn’t help but question it when she saw you light up at a notification on your phone.  ‘Want to meet up after your work and eat some chicken? I know a good place.’

___________________________________________________________ You forgot why you were so worried about hanging out with Jaebum in the first place. Talking with him, after the initial awkward greeting, was coming really easily to you. You only hoped he felt the same, it seemed so.  “So why Korea, hm?” Jaebum had asked, looking over at you as he drank his water. You chewed your food thoughtfully before swallowing. It was a question often asked, but it never bothered you to answer it. “I fell in love with this country the first week I came here, back in school.” You explained, “I’ve only ever felt at home in one other place, and it was with my grandparents. But when I came here... it just felt right, you know? Like fate was telling me to come here. So I wanted to come back after figuring out what I wanted to do.” Jaebum listened well, nodding along as you spoke. “I see. And you found teaching was it?” You nodded. “I love what I do, even more so that I get to do it in the place that feels like home.”  A small smile creeped along his face, and you coughed to distract yourself from staring. “So what do you do, Im Jaebum?”  After finding out that he HATED being addressed by his full name, especially by someone younger than him (which you were by a year), you couldn’t resist. You had to. “I’m a freelancer. I do a lot of music production work or lyricist support.” He rolled his eyes at your antics, but didn’t say anything. You lit up at the mention of music. Your father loved music, and you had fond memories of growing up with him playing everything from Mozart to The Eagles while your mother was gone. “That’s so cool! Did you go to school for it or is it just... apart of you?” You struggled to find the words to describe what you meant. While you were confident in your Korean, some words just... didn’t translate well in your opinion. He chuckled lowly, “I’ve been making and doing music since I was young. Never thought about doing anything else once I found it. I learned along the way.” The conversation continued, talking about favorite genres of music, eventually leading you to ask how his cats liked his music or if they preferred a certain type, to you demanding to know why Nora keeps trying to bully Odd. It was nice. Really, really nice actually. Jaebum smiled so much at you and even joined in your weird reactions or antics and it just made you feel warm and happy on the inside. He even insisted on paying since he was older and who were you to refuse free food? You were to excited -- you made a friend! The talking lulled while walking back to the apartment complex, but the silence wasn’t an awkward one. It was gentle and understanding. You didn’t need to fill up the space with idle, unneeded chit chat to be with each other. As you came to the doors of the building, Jaebum opened the door and allowed you to go first, and you might’ve missed it because of how bashful he sounded. “It’s been a while since I’ve had fun with someone who’s not my group.. Thanks, Y/N.” You smiled brightly. “Well, consider me apart of your group. We’re friends now Jae!” There you went with no honorifics. He scowled at you, pinching your neck as you tried to avoid him on your way to the elevator. “At least call me hyung or something if not oppa, you disrespectful brat!” He called out, only getting your childish giggles as his response. Hanging out with Jaebum wasn’t really easy or often. He’s really busy and his schedule is… not consistent. You knew it was due to his job and not because he hated you, so you weren’t as worried about it as you could be. Especially since he tried to talk to you at least once a week, even it was just a brief conversation in the stairwell, or on your way out to work. It was enough for you. Of course you see each other a little more often than usual because of the mail situation. For some reason, the mail person could not understand that just because you were one of the only foreigners from the U.S. in the building does not mean that every package from the U.S. is for you. But it did give you an excuse to go see Jaebum after a week, so you head up the stairs, package in hand, and you hear Jae’s voice -- and a few others, it sounded like? Huh? “Jae??? Is that you???” You peer up the stairwell to see if you can catch him, and soon you see Jae leaning over his own railing, catching sight of you and waving, but looking over to where you couldn’t see and looking a little pissed off. Oh... That was new. Was someone bothering him? Were you bothering him? You started apologizing, “Hey sorry if this is a bad time -- I got another package from your friend and I just --” “Yoooo Who’s that?! It sounds like a girl OH are you in love?!” A loud, excited male voice shouted over you, startling you and almost making you drop the package in your arms. “I told you her name is Y/N and she’s a friend!!” Jaebum’s chin seemed to stick out in reaction to your startled state -- you hoped he wasn’t too mad at you. Or his friend. It’s not his fault you’re easily scared.  You decided to call out once more, “So... the box?”  He looked down at you, his arm pointed and pushing someone, supposedly his friends, as he responded. “Yeah, bring it up, I’ll grab it from you -- Just let me get my friends into the apartment.” “I want to meet her!” “Bring her to us!” “Let us see her!” The loud, rambunctious voices all decided to loudly protest at once, making you shake a little in your boots, letting Jaebum disappear from your sight before sitting down to regain your nerve. You didn’t know Jaebum had... such loud friends. Feral children was the phrase that came to mind... Gathering your nerve, you walked up the stairs and into Jaebum’s hallway, where he’s already waiting for you, leaning against the door as it bumped against him at times, the sounds of whining and demands to see you seeping through the solid door. “Thanks, Y/N.” Jaebum smiled gently, taking the box from you. You managed a smile back, jumping at the sudden movement of the door that jostled him forward. “Sorry, I didn’t want to overwhelm you.” He apologized, kicking the door, “Hopefully you can meet them later, but right now I can tell they’re going to be too much for you and I actually want you to still be my friend after meeting them.” His explanation was a little rushed at the end, pink tinging his cheeks. Was Jaebum embarrassed? Well that was kinda cute.  You quickly pushed that thought aside. But you couldn’t help but flush. He noticed that about you? “Sorry, Jae...” “Don’t apologize! When you’re ready we can set something up. I think you’ll like them when they’re calmer.” His smiled widened, “Then I’ll have someone calm and not evil to combat these brats.” “I thought I was a brat, though?” You tilted your head, feeling more at ease. He rolled his eyes.  “You’re all brats and I suffer. But I guess I enjoy suffering.” He shrugged. “Well, I’ll see you around Y/N. Promise.” You nodded, scurrying off before Jaebum’s friends could break the door down. After getting into the apartment, you smiled to yourself. Jaebum liked you enough to want to meet his friends. You were friends.

#a new beginning #got7 au #got7 x y/n #got7 fiction #got7 jb #got7 jackson #got7 mark #got7 jinyoung #got7 youngjae #got7 bambam #got7 yugyeom #jb x reader #mark tuan x reader #jinyoung x reader #jackson x reader #youngjae x reader #bambam x reader #yugyeom x reader #im jaebum #jb scenarios #got7 fanfic #last piece

[brelione]

JJ dating a Kook headcannons

I feel like he’d really love stretchmarks and find them hella attractive

He prefers brownies over cake

He enjoys puns

He likes pretty much all music except for heavy metal because the screams give him anxiety

He’d listen to Billie Eilish and Bring Me The Horizon

Likes to go shopping with you and stopping by the yankee candle store to smell all of the candles

You like to buy him comfy clothing and keep it in your dresser for when he slept over

Your shower is fancy as hell and he loves taking showers at your house 

He actually loves cooking and cooks plenty for you because your kitchen has all the proper ingredients he needs

He has a goal to fuck you in every room of your house

He feels so relaxed and mentally clean in your home

He’d walk in,let out a loud sigh like all of his stress had fled his body. “What?”You asked,placing your bag down.He shrugged. “I just really like your house.”He answered.

When there were large,powerful hurricanes he’d come to your house to watch movies,eat poptarts and enjoy the air conditioning because of your ventilator

John.B and Pope would come to your house after storms to play video games and text people

You loved to spoil JJ with whatever he wanted

A new phone,new boxers,new bed sheets

He loved to go through your closet and plan outfits for you

“Where did you get these panties?”He asked,holding up a pair of lavender lace.You looked at them,shrugging. “I dunno,why?”You asked.He smirked. “You should go back there and get a matching bra.”He suggested.You grinned. “Babe,i already have one.”

Your parents approved of him after meeting him briefly

He liked to float around in your pool and take your dog for walks

“You know,I could really get used to the kook life.”He grinned,looking over at you from your living room couch.You raised your eyebrows,scratching behind your dogs ears. “Yeah?I thought you hated kooks.”You bit your lip,waiting for his response.He nodded. “Yeah,I hate kooks but I dont hate their lifestyle.”He answered.

He loved when you’d take showers with him and let him wash your hair and body for you

Soemtimes he’d just sit in your bathroom for twenty minutes and enjoy it

You’d walk downstairs and see him dancing to the frozen soundtrack around the open room,sliding across the tile with his socks on

He likes your fancy blender

“Dude!Can this crush like...frozen fruit?”He asked.You giggled,grabbing a bag of frozen blueberries and tossing it to him.He loved watching the blueberries blend into purple paste and adding oatmilk into it. “Wowwwww.”He whispered.

He loved going out on your family’s boat with you

“Theres a mini fridge in your boat?Can we pick up the others so we can show them?”He asked.

“Hey babyyyyy?”He asked,lifting his head off of your stomach.You hummed,looking down at him. “Can we take Hugo for a walk?”He asked.

Sometimes you wondered if maybe he loved the dog more than you but those thoughts left your head whenever he hugged you or kissed you

Even though you could buy anything you wanted,including his life,he still loved buying you things to show you how much he appreciated you

He really loved paying for your McDonalds and your iced coffees

You and Kiara were pretty close friends even before JJ

You both had terrible experiences with Sarah Cameron and bonded over your dislike of her

Rafe having a crush on you and trying to sabotage your relationship multiple times

Topper was your ex,leading to your bad experience with Sarah Cameron when she started dating him

JJ was jealous of both boys,holding your hand tighter whenever he saw them when you two were out together

If you had a particularly close encounter with Rafe Cameron JJ’s jealousy would build up inside of him and he’d fuck you extra hard against your shower wall

You were able to get him into places he never thought hed get into including country clubs and fancy museums

He picked up reading as a hobby after you two went on a trip to the library together

On mornings after having him pound into you for hours youd be a bit sore so hed run you a hot bath and make you a nice breakfast,rubbing your tummy and thighs 

He loved every dress you owned

Everytime you sent him a new selfie it would become his lockscreen

He learned that he was a dog person because of you

“Hey-hey look at this dog toy I stole for Hugo!”He exclaimed,showing you a sqeaking dolphin.

@nas-marie-loves-u​​ @28cnn​​ @sexytholland​​ @copper-boom​​ 

If you’d like to be tagged in all future JJ imagines/headcannons/series comment with a heart,if you’d like to be tagged in all future Pope imagines/headcannons/series comment with a smiling face,if you’d like to be tagged in all future Rafe imagines/headcannons/series comment with a frowning face,if you’d like to be tagged in all future Kiara imagines/headcannons/series comment with a question mark and if you’d like to be tagged in all future Sarah Cameron imagines/headcannons/series comment with a plus sign.Or if thats too complicated you can just comment whose name you’d like to be tagged in.

#jj maybank #jj maybankxreader #jj maybank imagine #jj x you #jj maybank oneshot #jj x reader #jj outer banks #jj imagine #jj maybank x kook #jj maybank headcanon #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank x you #jj maybank x #rudy pankow #rudy pankow imagine #topper thornton #topper thorton x reader #topper thorton imagine #topper imagine #rafe cameron #rafe obx #rafe x reader #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x you

[redloftwingfeathers]

I feel like talking about the shit Zelda not only had to put up with but also what she subconsciously summoned herself and you're going to sit and listen and maybe cry with me okay? Okay.

While I don't think that was very cash-money of 'Hylia' to make Zelda wait until she's reached true, unrelenting despair to finally find her light, it made me wonder how everything came into play that made her journey so painstakingly hard, and not just Hylia pulling fast ones from the clouds. (Trust me I wanted to blame the goddess so bad after that moving performance at the spring of power but wait!! there's more!)

Things I'm looking at are specifically Zelda's anxieties of wanting to be a scholar but having to throw herself to the dogs of religion to keep Rhoam happy, the HEAVY depression she carries with not just from the loss of her mother but also just constantly being berated by her father and feeling like she's not good enough for Hylia, the jealousy and anger she harbors towards Link in their beginnings and how it effects her growth.

All of these are things (coming from someone who is very mentally ill) are ingredients that distract Zelda from her goals, intentional or not.

Zelda has a classic case of "I wanna do This Thing (studying, traveling) but I have to do That Thing (religion, strict orders) instead and now the fun is sucked out of it and my mind is buzzing and now I don't know what to do girl (hylia) HELP"

What's even worse is despite her hand-picked maturity, she KNOWS what is right and what she needs to do (her level of self awareness is impeccable sometimes) but she is still just a child in the end, wanting to live her life without dictation, which causes frustration and anger and can lead to self-doubts.

Starting with the loss of her mother, Rhoam claims that Zelda did not cry at all during the ceremony, and that it proved to him he could still be a strong king with how unwavering his daughter was. And although that's shown as an "awe inspiring" moment, it shows Rhoam does not understand how the processing of grief registers differently amongst people, especially children. She may have not showed it when she was, what, 6? (Not every normal 6 year old understands the fragility of mortality) but you can definitely see it affects her later on as Zelda grows older. It may not be entirely visible at first, but the way they portray it in HWAoC (I know its not entirely canon but bare with me on this) she longs for her mother's advice and comfort when her pleas and ideas fall deaf on the king's ears. Her mother seemed to be a very wise and compassionate queen, where Rhoam is a wise and a very bite-the-bullet king.

When stakes are high he trusts what he thinks needs to be done, and he enforces Zelda to finish her training Because she is part of his plan to push back the calamity. He knows protocol, and there's no room for creative thinking when the land of Hyrule is in danger. (Disclaimer: I hate Rhoam but I can also try to see what Nintendo was doing. He's not intentionally mean, he's an assertive dad that wants to see his daughter succeed (and also hella depressed) but he's really fucking bad at it and comes off as a dickhead. He is the embodiment of a boomer that does things the old fashioned way to get things done).

But all of this pressure he is putting on her, taking away things that make her happy so they don't distract her from her duty, shooting down her ideas because he wouldn't know how to even approach it from his standpoint, it really does a number on Zelda and really births her insecurities.

No matter how hard she prays and dedicates herself to Hylia, it doesn't work. Her mind is distracted, filled with fear and very little hope that the magic isn't Working. What even kicks me in the jaw more is that she's putting all of her effort into these prayers, and it's not even her wish she's making. It's Rhoam's wish. Her Ancestral Family's wish. That's why it hasn't sparked. She's praying on the behalf of her father and ancestors and not herself because she firmly believes there's other ways to settle the score. Zelda knows the importance of her role but its just not clicking when someone else is forcing you to do it. It just doesn't work like that.

Moving onto her liaison with Link, she is, well, in the beginning very irritated with him. Even a little bit after being chosen by Fi. But I don't think she MEANS to be angry at Link, he didn't do anything wrong in all honesty. She shouldn't take out her anger on him, but she's jealous, and he exists...so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When Link is suddenly chosen by the sword at a drop of a hat?? Yeah she's relieved, but there's also undertones of resentment. All of her Champions are here at the ready and she's still trying to figure out what shoe goes on first. She is the goddamn Princess of Hyrule, one who carries the blood of Hylia in her veins, and this random tiny knight who, mind you, fought tooth and nail to be her escort ends up finding his role before her? She is riding the struggle mule up Mount Lanayru (and I don't really blame her). And when she's exploring the shrines?? She makes it very clear to him she can work independently and does not need an escort, which although understood (freedom is a peace everyone strives for) she is careless regardless of her careful planning and efforts. She's a Princess, wandering Hyrule unarmed (and without her powers) with a horse as her only mode of transportation. You won't see yourself as a target even if they're pinned on your back, and with her determination to utilize these mysterious shrines as more Sheikah tech is being discovered is making her blind in remembering where she's placed in social status. It's dangerous, and I'm glad Link is there to see what she fails to see.

That's another thing too. As they progress and strengthen their friendship, Zelda sees Link as a mirror to question what her role really means. She uses him as guidance to help understand her situation, asking him "If you were told your whole life This is what you're meant to do, to take up your family's legacy...but one day realize this isn't what you want, would you still take the path you've been told to take?" In this case I think it's safe to say this is what Link knew he wanted. He loves being an aid to those in need, and becoming a knight despite following his father's path, this felt like his true calling. The spirit of the hero is VERY strong in his soul, and when he sees someone in need of help [Zelda] he's going to aid them whether they want it or not.

But Zelda still feels so lost, she feels so disconnected from her ancestors, as the previous daughters in the royal families were Given their powers at birth and meant to be awakened when the time has come. They were all given the gift of premonition, to be a medium for Hylia and a messenger of the gods, and overall able to keep Ganon away from the world no matter how many times he crawls back from the depths of hell. Being told your whole life you're meant to be like your ancestors, but not being able to fulfill any of those roles? It makes the past seem like one giant fairy tale when in you're in BotW Zelda's shoes.

No voices, no premonitions, no secret awakenings...Nothing.

At this moment, I finally understood why Urbosa said to Revali about Link. She said he is a constant reminder of Zelda's own failures. Link found his calling by following his instinct. Zelda has yet to figure out what she really wants, and is clouded by judgements not only from her father and people, but from herself too. With every passing day she is undergoing a meltdown, questioning if she is even meant to be apart of this whole plan anymore, probably something among the lines of "Was it meant to be someone else? I'm the only daughter, and yet I can't even do my one job." She lost everyone and everything, she's frightened, it feels like she's lost her faith in the gods, or even dare say, the gods lost faith in her.

But through absolute despair when Link just about gives his life for her protection, that's when it all clicked. She found her power and strength through Link, who was the one that, all this time, taught her about what she needed to do to awaken her powers without even directly telling her. Every conversation she had with him, she saw herself in Link. She saw all the effort he gave into becoming a royal knight, the unwavering determination in his eyes with every Lynel he slew, a never ending supply of optimism and hope no matter how high the stakes were. And yet he was also Free. He followed his path blindly, not even knowing where he'd end up, as long as he knew he was

able to protect those in need. And she wanted that.

He was her mirror, and Zelda managed to awaken herself when that mirror cracked.

Living the burden of being part of a prophecy and saying you're ready for anything, is very reckless. Understanding the heaviness that comes with sacrifice is not truly understood until it starts happening to you.

Zelda found her wish, her independence through Link. Her mind is finally clear and she understands what her role means in all of this.

She is meant to protect, to save, to understand more than just personal loss.

Zelda couldn't stand by idly anymore after everyone told her to do something else and let others handle the job. That was the last straw when Link stood in front of her, shield weak but at the ready when that guardian approached. She saw the desperation and said NO, which finally broke her seal. She chose to sacrifice herself, igniting her powers just as Hylia did for her people. She chose to save her last, literally dying hope, because Ganon cannot be fought alone.

He was the connection, the literal link, she needed to awaken her powers. And I just find that so fucking great.

Anyways thanks for coming to my TED talk I've been typing this for like 4 hours now

#hHGDFJDF SORRY THIS IS SO LONG #dont tag as zelink pls i tried keeping this ambiguous as possible thank #the legend of zelda #botw #aoc spoilers #sorta #cat talks #also my thoughts are flying faster than my fingers #so this might skip and jump around #my adhd welcomes you

[honesthammie]

From my prompt list:

4) After reaching your 16th birthday you gain the ability to see everyone's red strings of fate and on your 18th you finally get to see yours, except yours dissappears into the ground/sky.

Fandom:Doctor who

Pairing: 13 x gender neutral reader

This is my first fic on tumblr. I know its hella long and not all of my fics will be like this. This came to me from a dream I had recently. I love Jodie and I decided to write the spider episode from a different perspective. I may have change the episode slightly to fit the reader. I am thinking of doing a part 2 but it may be a while before I do as I have deadlines and stuff to keep up with. The next part may be more fluff between 13 and yourself. I know this didn't have much but it's something. I'm also sorry to any Americans reading this, I love yas but its just the personality I put to go with the readers personality. I'm also sorry for any spelling mistakes as I'm doing this on my phone.

Summary: spider episode with a small change I'm plot to accommodate your beautiful self in this fic

Warnings: slight description of a couple of panic/anxiety attacks, swearing and a bit of angst. Long intro for small fluff. And it's a part 1 do I guess a small cliffhanger is a warning?

Beep beep beep. Your alarm starts blaring in your ears, waking you up with a start. You glare at the interrupting machine before turning it off. After such a crazy night, you did not want your sleep so rudely interrupted. Why did you have a crazy night? It's your 18th birthday today and your friends decided to visit your place for a little house party, last night, to celebrate and now you have a pounding headache.

You groaned as you realised, you would need to take some pain meds before you even think about going back to sleep. Slipping out of your bed, you walk to the bathroom and find the cupboard with all sorts of medicinal and bathroom bits and bobs. You then grab the glass that you placed there in preparation for the definite hangover. The glass was a little cold to the touch but you filled it with some cool water from the sinks tap.

You took two, just so you could have a longer sleep. You waddle back into your bedroom and just as you get comfy, you widen your eyes at the memory. You needed to see your mother today, she said she had a gift for you but she would only be at home until 11. You looked at the machine that you hated for the time. It was currently 10:05. You jumped to your feet and rush to get ready.

As you walked outside, you saw the regular red strings that you saw everyday. Why do you see strings? You honestly didn't know, but you knew their purpose, it helped match 2 soulmates together. But something seemed a little off, there was no one on the street anymore, so why could you still see one line of destiny? You decided to follow the string south, down to your own (s/c) hand which was now slightly shaking at the sight.

"Fuck. Fuck,fucky fucking fuck. Why now? Why me? What the shit is going on with me?" You curse to yourself. You could feel your breath getting rapid and your head started spinning slightly. You quickly unlocked your car and sat down to help calm you down. You took a few deep breaths and focused on your senses.

When you eventually calmed down, you decided to look at where the string led. Oh, how you shouldn't have looked. It didn't go in any way of a compass, it went straight up and past the clouds. How? You had so many questions but you had to focus on the day ahead.

You had been to your mothers house and collected your new (fave game series) and your card. You were incredibly thankful as you have been saving up to buy it for yourself one day. You had played the previous games and loved every one of them and to say you were excited was an understatement. You almost ran back into your place if it wasn't for needing the key to access the gates.

Living in a gated community helped you feel a lot safer but it did also make you a big target for thieves to practise picking locks. No one had figured out where the hidden camera that kept alerting the authorities was though. Even you have tried put of plain curiosity but you got stumped after the 10th day of searching. You were sure you looked in every possible hiding spot, yet the camera always seemed to evade you in the pointless game of hide and seek.

As you unlocked the gate, you felt a twitch on your finger. The string was moving down and at a very fast pace, almost falling speed. You looked up and saw a small black dot heading towards the ground, if thats your soulmate, they would certainly be dead the second they meet their fate. When you could no longer see the dot, you kept your eyes glued to the string, waiting for it to disappear like everyone else's did when a soulmate died.

After five minutes, the string was still there and was still as red as ever, like no harm had come to them. But thats not possible. No creature could survive that especially from that great a height! You were beyond curious and quickly went into your living room and searched on all your social media for anyone else that may have spotted the dot in the sky, yet no one had but you knew (b/f) had another massive fight with their roommate, Stella, over whose turn it was to do the dishes again.

If you didn't know that Stella was in a relationship with another, you would have sworn those two were in a relationship. You giggled at the silly thought, "if Stella ever goes through a break up with her, I'm totally gonna set those two up."

You give up on finding anything out today, maybe it'll be on the news tomorrow and you set off to go on an online shopping spree, you had a few codes and now, thanks to your wonderful mother, had a little cash to spare and you did see that gorgeous top on sale. Once you had spent the day either shopping or gaming you decided to head to bed but you couldn't stop thinking about that dot and what the red string meant for you.

When your alarm had went off, you hit it and got dressed for your new job at some hot shot posh hotel run by an aspiring American with High expectations and little experience with Sheffield. You had been told you wouldn't get to meet him much and you were beyond fine with that, you hated Americans, simply because you hated violence and guns were the big no on your weaponry list of avoidance. You didn't mind weapons in video games, those were harmless to the outside world. You didn't mind verbal violence though, it was all you had to defend yourself with and in Sheffield, that was better than nothing. You were very short tempered when it came to your anger but you found that it was either verbal or physical, you chose to be verbal.

You looked at your phone for any messages from (b/f) and had a good luck message. You replied with a smiley face and a "ill need all the luck I can get. I've heard from a few employees that he can be a real asshole for no reason and fires people just because they made eye contact for too long. It's like he suspects someone is out for his blood."

After 2 minutes you received a reply from from them. "You better be on your best behaviour then, young lady!"

"That's the problem. I wonder what the record is for the quickest a person has got fired? Because I may break that, you know me! I don't exactly do as I'm told, that's why finding a job has been so hard. Anyway, I best get ready, gotta look the part! First impressions and all!" You replied with a nervous face. What you failed to notice was the red string no longer pointing towards the sky and you were making it shorter with every step you took. You did give up on finding out about the strange dot and came to the assumption that it fell in a lake, there were plenty of them around.

You walked into the swanky looking hotel and noticed the cobwebs that definitely were not there two days ago when you had your interview, yet they looked like they had been there for weeks. You would have put it down to Halloween decorations if it wasn't for the fact that it was June. You decided to not ask in case this was some sort of strange new American trend that your boss was following to help bring in the youth. It does help make it fit into Sheffield a lot more with the run down and abandoned look. It would need some rust, water damage, mold and cracks to finish the look but it was a start. If you had to be honest, the spider webs helped bring the place together. It was way too posh for Sheffield but you had to lie and say you love it in order to get hired. Just from that lie alone you knew exactly the personality of your boss, arrogant, vain and ignorant.

"Hello, you must be my new helper! I'm Najia, your second in command here. As you can see, there are loads of spider webs so they should be priority. If you could start cleaning in the south west second floor and continue that floor, that would be amazing. Now here's your cleaning trolley and if you happen to finish the floor early, send me a little message through the walkie talkie and I'll give you another room or floor. Do you have any questions?" Najia spoke softly. She seemed lovely and it was shame that she had to be in a place that would get more damage than its worth.

"Just one question: why so many spider webs?"

"I don't know, they just seemed to have appeared, I thought it was silly string from some teenagers that managed to break in somehow but it is actual spider web. It wasn't here when I left last night. I guess I'll have to ask someone about that."

And with that you separated and got to your floor when you finally noticed a slight burning sensation on your finger, it wasn't hurtful. It was like putting the finger in a really hot bath. You looked down and noticed it now pointed downhill and seemed to be glowing a shade of gold ever so gently that you would miss it if the weird sensation didn't make you look.

You left your trolley outside a toilet to make it seem like you were in there when really you had wondered off to follow the string. You would probably lose yourself in the maze of hallways that all looked the same as the last if the string didn't help lead you to a ballroom. You opened the door and instantly screamed. A giant spider was walking towards you, however you couldn't get out, you had used a staff door which needed a key card to use from this side as the other side still needed to be fitted and you left yours in the trolley, near the toilets. And the massive spider seemed to be blocking the other way out so you were trapped.

You weren't scared of spiders but seeing them at the size of a van did intimidate you. You started shaking from fear of what it would do to you. Out of pure instinct, you put your hand out to protect yourself and the sound of 8 legs against wooden flooring had ceased. The only sound was your laboured breathing. It stayed like this for what seemed like hours but in actuality was only 5 minutes. You opened your eyes slowly to see 8 more stare right back. 8 eyes that showed fear but no intention of harm. Instead the spider gave you space to breathe by walking back a few feet. Then it seemed to be watching you, studying your next move to see if you were a threat and whether or not it should kill you.

You stayed still for a moment, wrapping your head around what had just happened before gently walking towards the creature with both hands forward to show them clean of weapons. You decided to try and speak to the spider to see if it can understand you.

"Hello. I'm new around here, I'm sorry if I'm trespassing on your area, I wasn't aware of you being here to be honest. I mean you no harm, if anything, I want to help you but unfortunately, I'm stuck in here aswell." You spoke carefully as if it was a child that was afraid. You gently put your hand in its head and it seemed to understand your good intentions and your situation as it let you pet it. Now you were close, you started to admire it and realised it wasn't poisonous or venomous, it was just a regular house spider. But you couldn't figure out how or why it got this big but it did explain the cobwebs everywhere.

You had been with the spider for hours and it seemed like Najia either didn't care or has gotten fired as she hasn't asked about you. You had spent the time talking or singing to the spider. She, as you found out after looking it up, seemed to put her body around you to protect you. You had even met a couple of her children as they gave you food from the cafeteria to nibble on when your stomach growled.

Eventually the burning on your fingers turned up massively and was causing you pain. The spider seemed to sense this and wrapped her web around your finger to help cool it down a little. It didn't help but you showed gratitude anyway as she was only trying to help in anyway she could. You gave her a small smile and her eyes seemed to show sympathy in return.

Then the doors opened again and the sound of several feet walked in. "Oh thank god. I thought I was never going to be found in here." You thought to yourself as you heard the voices mumble to each other and probably about Betty and what's the best way to get rid of her. You would have paid more attention if your finger didn't feel like it had caught fire and was tight as if your soulmate was amongst those that had walked in.

Now you were nervous. How would you introduce yourself? What did they look like? Were they male or female, not that you really cared? So many questions made you feel lightheaded so you grabbed onto Betty to keep yourself planted.

Then the door opened again and a familiar voice echoed in the hall and you knew exactly how he'd want to deal with Betty and after your bond today, you would rather die than her. She was obviously innocent here and maybe the others could see it. Then you heard the familiar click of a gun safety being taken off and your body reacted before your mind did and you jumped in front of her to stop him, although you had a feeling it wouldn't, but it was worth a shot for the others to stop him.

"Don't you fucking dare shoot that gun Dickhead! Not without going through me!" You spoke with fire in your eyes and maybe a slight mix if fear aswell. That's when you looked over at the new group of people. They all seemed trustworthy enough.

There was Najia, who welcomed you here earlier and she looked sad, so she had definitely been fired. Then there was another woman who looked a lot like her, you guessed she was a daughter or something and she was pretty and definitely somone with authority with the way she stood and held herself, maybe she is a police officer? A man who looked as though he was in his 50s and definitely did not belong in this weird group. A young man who looked of a similar age to the police woman, maybe they are friends.

Then you laid your eyes on one of the most beautiful woman, no, human, you had ever seen and would probably never see again. She had short blonde hair in a bob. They seemed to be brunette at the root. She had beautiful chocolate honey eyes that glimmers with so much emotion and age well beyond her years, like she had experienced thousands of years before this moment. You also noticed her odd sense of style but you admired her boldness and it did look amazing on her. You decided she could only be described as sunshine and rainbows.

Then you noticed her hand And a familiar red string that was also glowing a beautiful subtle gold. Like millions of tiny golden stars circled around the string in a beautiful dance of love. Your eyes started to follow the string down and back to your own. She was your soulmate. That goddess that stood before you, was to be yours forever some day.

Then you looked into her hypnotic eyes before you remembered where you were and what situation you were in. And you realised everyone was staring at you for your previous action towards a spider.

"If you want to keep your job, I'd suggest you move out of the way silly girl!" Your boss grumbled in a threatening tone.

"Nope. You are about to hurt an innocent creature that is stuck and terrified. You built on top of landfill and didn't bother to check and thought of no consequences. This is your fault. Is this how you would treat a child that was a mistake after a one night stand or something? Would you shoot a child that had no choice?" You spoke with confidence yet more nerves now she was there listening to every word. When he didn't answer you shouted "Answer me! Would you shoot your mistake of a child?"

He glared at you. "This is different. This is an animal. A pest. It needs to be killed so more can't be born! I made my mistake and now I'm fixing it!" He bellowed just seconds before a shot was made from his gun. You had expected pain but instead you heard a horrible shriek from behind you.

You quickly turned around and petted her whilst whispering sweet words as she took her last breath. You stood up and made your way over to the murderer. You couldn't stand him and you were so tempted to take his gun and shoot him with it, but you didn't. With fire in your eyes and pure hatred, you slapped him hard enough to leave a mark and maybe a bruise as a reminder of his shitty choices. "You can't fire me because I fucking quit you arrogant dick! She had caused no harm to you or I and I'm sure if you would have sorted it sooner, so many more lives could have been saved as she only had humans because flies didn't fill her anymore! She was so kind and just so afraid. I hope you lose everything you pathetic sad sack of boiled shit! You are truest one of the lowest excuses for a human I have ever met and if we meet again please be very afraid, because next time, it won't just be a slap you have to worry about! It'll be your balls as I cut them off beacuse men like you shouldn't repopulate the planet! You horrid scum! I hope your empire fucking collapses!" You spoke with venom lacing every word. You were seething and boy did his face look punchable. Instead you walked away with your middle finger proudly being the last thing he sees as you walk out the normal doors.

Once you were outside, you sat in the steps and finally let out all the emotions. You cried so hard, over your loss of yet another job and a newly found friend. You screamed at him with a string of curses that would offend just about anybody. You suddenly felt somone sit at the side of you. You knew who it was when the string was burning more than ever before and yet you couldn't feel it over the pain your heart.

"You did brilliant back there. You chose, not just your job, but your life over a creature you barely even knew! If you wouldn't have jumped in when you did, I don't think her children would've had a chance to escape to my TARDIS because he's going on a hunt right now for the rest of them. Sure, you didn't save her but you saved so many more lives than you think. And I know each one is eternally grateful for what you did. I know I would be." Her words were certain and sympathetic. They seemed to calm you down instantly. Or maybe is was the way she talked that helped with her soft but strong voice and you knew you already couldn't get enough like it was the best drug ever. You could listen to her all day and yet, she had said very little to you. It was a strange effect but you liked it.

She fell into a silence for a while just keeping you company as you came to terms with had happened.

#thirteenth doctor x reader #13th doctor x reader #doctor who x reader #thirteenth doctor #doctor who

[eyeofthedrgn]

Rowcan Oneshot - Just Friends

Here's a slightly angsty fluff AU Rowcan piece that I whipped up. I wanted something a little less heavy that A Heavy Battle Symphony. Let me know what you think!

TW: Language, mentions of alcoholism, I think that's it.

Word count: 2648

Just Friends

Lorcan was waiting. He still had two hours, but he didn't have anything else to do. So he waited. Maybe he should turn on a movie or take a nap. Or both.

Laying on the couch, he put on a movie he had seen a million times. The Disney movie Tangled. It was his guilty pleasure. He always felt like he identified with Flynn Ryder. No one knew, though. No one could ever know. So he made sure to set an alarm so he could turn it off before anyone showed up.

He fell asleep shortly after "I Have a Dream." His alarm went off. Lorcan didn't hear it. He only startled awake when he heard the door close. As quickly as he could, he turned off the TV before whoever it was saw the menu screen of the well loved bluray.

"Lor, where you at?" A voice echoed through his small house. Rowan was always the first to arrive. Always punctual. It drove him nuts, but it was also endearing. Hellas, he needed to stop thinking like that. Rowan was his friend. That's it. Friends.

"Living room," he hollered back as he ran his fingers through his shoulder length hair. He pulled the hair tie off his wrist and put his hair up in a messy bun as he walked down the hall to the kitchen where he saw Rowan putting food and drinks in the fridge and shoving a casserole in the oven.

Ah, shit.

He hated watching Rowan acting at home. Actually, he loved it, but they were friends. Just friends. He sighed, the silver haired hottie turned to him then.

"What?" He laughed. “Were you napping?”

"Nothing. No." Lorcan just pushed his feelings deep down like he always did and kept his face stoic. He pushed past the man and opened the fridge to pull out a chilled beer. Apparently, he was going to need it tonight.

"I thought you were trying to quit," Rowan seemed confused. Lorcan was trying to cut down on the alcohol, well... quit, but fuck if it wasn’t hard. It had started to get out of control after he broke it off with Maeve and couldn’t get a grasp on himself and his sexuality. His confusion with his sexuality was a big decision in said break up. But it also helped lead to the drinking. Lorcan had felt lost and didn't know who he was anymore. So the alcohol helped hide his strange feelings for his friend.

Lorcan had been in a long-term relationship with Maeve. She wasn't the best person, he thought he loved her, but she had just manipulated him to do the things she wanted. And she cheated on him. Multiple times. She always managed to get him to forgive her. Every. Single. Time.

He had finally broken it off after seven years. Rowan and his group of friends had finally gotten him to understand that she was a terrible, manipulative person and he deserved better. He had met them at a bar a year before he broke it off with her.

It was also around then that he realized he wasn't straight. He wasn't sure what he was, but Rowan made him feel things that no one else had ever made him feel, even his girlfriend who claimed loved him. The way the man talked to him, comforted him, listened to him, it did things to him. He always wanted to smile around him, but refrained. Lorcan was always the grumpy person in the room, he couldn't ruin his reputation for some guy he shouldn't have feelings for.

After a couple years, he finally decided he needed to cut back. The small intervention from his friends may have also had something to do with it.

"I am. I just," he shrugged, unsure of how to finish his thought.

Rowan just grabbed the beer from him before he could take a drink and gave him a look.

"Fine." Lorcan took a glass from the cupboard and filled it with water from the fridge door. He leaned his forehead against the stainless steel while he waited for his glass to fill. The cool surface helped with the slight warmth trying to flush on his skin. Why did his friends care so much?

A knock on the door sounded before it opened and the hall filled with familiar voices. Suddenly, Lorcan didn't want anyone in his house. He had been fighting his demons the last couple of days, but he couldn't cancel the dinner they had had planned for a month. It had been a long time since they could all get together. He took a big gulp of his non-alcoholic water.

A chorus of hello's sounded as the kitchen quickly filled up. Dishes were placed on the small island, other dishes were put in the warming oven along with Rowan's casserole, and some went into the fridge.

Lorcan slipped out and back to the living room while conversations started. He pulled out his phone, opened up Spotify and connected to his house wide speakers before putting on a chill playlist. It Takes a Fool to Remain Sane quietly filled the house. It was one of his favorite songs.

A few people in the cramped kitchen started singing along as he sat on the couch. He just sighed. Lost in thought, he didn't hear Rowan come in and sit next to him.

"What are you doing in here by yourself?" Rowan nudged their shoulders together. Lorcan closed his eyes at the contact and the small zing that shot through his body.

Friends. They. Are. Friends.

"It's a little crowded in there." Rowan hummed in acknowledgment. Then he bumped their knees together. What the fuck was he doing? Did Rowan know he was being so touchy?

"Food's ready!" The sound of a cupboard opening and plates being pulled out met his ears giving Lorcan the perfect opportunity to get out of this uncomfortably comfortable situation. He stood and quickly went to the kitchen.

Lorcan wasn't even hungry. He was so anxious about what just happened between him and Rowan on the couch, the touches. He had to be imagining it, right?

Fenrys was at the end of the buffet line and he smiled when he saw Lorcan. "Hey, Lor! I forgot how small your kitchen is! Or it's that there's too many people in it!" He laughed. Somehow Fen was always cheery.

"I think it's the latter,” he huffed a laugh.

"I agree. So how have you been? I haven't seen you in a while."

"Fine. Same shit, different day."

Fen just chuckled. "How's sobriety treating you?"

"There are good days and bad days," he shrugged. The conversation cut off as soon as Fenrys had made it to the food.

Everyone had made themselves comfortable in the living room with their plates and beverages. Lorcan finally joined them and he saw that people weren't using coasters on his handmade coffee table.

"Hey, coasters!"

Aelin and Connall apologized while placing their cups on the leather discs. Conversations and laughter flitted through the air. Lorcan was sitting on the floor between the living room and kitchen, just pushing around his food with his fork. It smelled great and looked even better, but his anxiety was making him nauseous.

Someone sat down cross legged next to him, "Are you not feeling good?" Of course it was Rowan. He was always so observant. He just shook his head, hoping that would be the end of it.

Rowan just set his plate on the floor next to him and got up and went back to the kitchen. After hearing some shuffling and cupboards opening and closing and the microwave, he came back with a cup of chamomile tea. "Here. This should help. And yes, I put honey in it, just how you like it," he said with a small smile.

Lorcan's stomach fluttered and it wasn't because of the nausea. He took the mug, their fingers brushing. Fucking Hel.

The evening went on like that, conversations and laughter between his friends, small touches and gestures from Rowan.

Rowan was the last person left. He was in the kitchen putting the rest of the dishes in the dishwasher. Lorcan was grabbing the rest of the cups from the living room. Most people were good about taking their things back to the kitchen, but it was always Fenrys and Vaughan who left their dishes behind.

After setting the final cups on the counter he looked at Rowan as he put some leftovers in the fridge.

"I got it from here. You can head out."

Rowan looked at him with something in his eyes. Disappointment?

"Oh." He shut the fridge. "Uh, I thought maybe we could, uh, talk?"

Lorcan cocked an eyebrow. "About what?" He walked over to the sink and started rinsing glasses. Rowan stood next to him. Next thing he knew Rowan's lips were on his cheek.

He froze. His breathing stopped. Heat flushed up his neck, over his cheeks and to the tips of his ears. After a few moments, he managed to catch his breath, he set the glass down he was holding in the sink and turned off the water. Slowly, he turned to Rowan.

Rowan looked terrified that he just ruined everything.

"Sorry. Sorry, I just.. Sorry." Rowan was flustered, his cheeks were reddening. As he started turning away, Lorcan grabbed his elbow to keep him there. He just looked into Rowan's pine green eyes for several moments. The man in front of him seemed to squirm under his gaze.

"I.." Rowan started, but was cut off by Lorcan's lips against his. His eyes widened before closing and leaning into the kiss. His arms snaked up and wrapped around Lorcan's neck. Lorcan's hands rested gingerly on the other's waist.

"I've wanted to do that for a long time," Rowan confessed after they broke apart. Lorcan's brow creased in a frown. He had been missing out on kissing this man for how long?!

"How long?"

"Since I met you," Rowan said sheepishly, the blush deepening.

"Well, fuck." Lorcan dropped his hands to his side. "So I've been questioning my sexuality for years since meeting you and you've liked me this whole time?" Rowan just laughed, then hid his face against Lorcan's shoulder. The fluttering in Lorcan's stomach was back.

---

They sat on the couch and talked about everything and nothing all night. Lorcan finally felt free. At home for the first time in his life. Rowan had scooted closer to him throughout the night. It made the corner of Lorcan's mouth lift up every time he got closer.

Soon enough, Rowan was trying his best not to fall asleep on Lorcan's shoulder, but failing. Lorcan shifted and maneuvered them so they were spooning on the cushions, Rowan being the little spoon. He draped the blanket from the back of the couch over them and made sure the silver haired head was on a pillow before he wrapped an arm around the other man's waist. Rowan just wiggled closer and let out a sound of contentment. Lorcan laid there staring at the back of Rowan's neck, eyes tracing the black lines of his tattoo.

Was this happening? Could he be happy? Could he finally be happy? His throat tightened at the thought and his eyes started burning. He screwed his eyes shut and tried to focus on his breathing. Failing at calming himself, he silently cried himself to sleep hoping he wouldn’t wake Rowan.

---

The sun filtering through the curtains woke Lorcan before he wanted. He hadn't gotten much sleep. The last time he saw the clock it said 4:37 and it was now 6:30. Two hours was not enough. His eyes stung from being opened too soon.

Rowan seemed to still be asleep in his arms. His breathing was even and he hadn't stirred, so Lorcan tried to go back to sleep. But it never came. He was used to it, sort of, insomnia was his dear old friend.

After another hour or so, Rowan finally stirred. He yawned and stretched then wiggled around until he was facing Lorcan.

"Hi," Rowan's voice was deep and rough with sleep. He placed a soft kiss to the tip of Lorcan's nose and the smile that pulled at his lips couldn't be helped.

"Morning."

Rowan furrowed his brows. "How long have you been awake?" Lorcan just shrugged the shoulder he wasn't lying on. "We could have slept in your bed if that would have helped."

"I have insomnia. Sleep doesn't always happen." Rowan frowned at that.

"Thanks for holding me even though you were probably bored because you couldn't sleep."

Lorcan chuckled, "It was nice." It was. Really nice. Lorcan couldn't remember the last time he had cuddled anyone. And besides his minor breakdown, having Rowan's warm body pressed against him was comfortable and… right.

Rowan smiled at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling. It was a beautiful site. Lorcan let his eyes drink it in.

"Your eyes aren't black. They're dark chocolate with flakes of dark gold." Rowan sounded surprised. "They're so beautiful."

Beautiful? "What?" No one had ever called any part of him beautiful before. Not even Maeve.

"What? Has no one told you that before?" There wasn't any judgement in Rowan's question, just a hint of sadness. Lorcan just shifted his gaze away across the room. "Well, I think you and your eyes are beautiful."

He took a deep breath and brought his eyes back to settle on green ones. They just stared at each other for a while. Rowan brushed some of the hairs off Lorcan's brow then gently traced the lines of his face with his fingers. Lorcan had never been treated like that. Like he was fragile, like his face was worthy of memorizing by touch. He took a shaky breath as a tear slipped out of his eye and landed on the bridge of his nose before sliding off onto the pillow.

Rowan tangled their legs together and scooted closer. He rested his forehead against Lorcan's and stroked his hair. All of the tenderness Rowan was showing him started to overwhelm him enough that he couldn't hold back the flood gates anymore. A small sob left him, Rowan only held him closer.

After several minutes of crying what felt like eons of pent up emotions, he managed to fall asleep again. Rowan stayed close and watched him, eventually falling asleep himself.

---

Lorcan stretched and groaned before opening his eyes. He was thankful that his couch was comfortable to sleep on.

“Hi, sleepy head.” It seemed that Rowan had been awake for a bit and had decided to sit on the couch with Lorcan’s head on his lap. Lorcan just groaned and turned his face into the other’s stomach. Rowan just laughed at him as he pet his hair.

“Oh no.” Lorcan finally heard what Rowan had been watching on the television. “Mother Knows Best” was sounding through the speakers. He immediately sat up and covered himself as much as he could with the blanket as he made himself as small as possible. Complete and utter embarrassment flooded his veins. Rowan was a giggling mess next to him.

“This is not funny,” Lorcan’s voice was muffled by the blanket.

“Of course not,” Rowan managed to squeak out through his laughter. Lorcan had to admit that he adored that sound and if he had to be a puddle of embarrassment to hear it, then it wasn’t all bad. He peeked out from under the blanket at the pile of giggles next to him. “Come here!” Rowan held his arms out.

“You can’t tell anyone,” Lorcan said sternly, but there was no bite to it.

“Never.” The giggle fit finally calmed down.

Rowan glowed as Lorcan curled up next to him, head once again on his lap as they both watched the movie.

___

Thanks for reading! Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future Rowcan fics!

#rowcan #rowan x lorcan #rowan whitethorn #rowcan fanfic #lorcan salvaterre #throne of glass

[writingfortoomanyfandoms]

I Need You

Pairing: Calum Hood x Reader

Summary: The relationship through the years

Requested: No

Warnings: Swearing, just a lot of fluff, mentions of anxiety

A/N: This is probably the longest fic I’ve ever written I got a bit carried away so I apologise - sorry if any of the times/ages are wrong! Just go with it! I’m kinda exhausted writing this so I was trying to do the kinda basic maths in my head and it just gave me a headache but please excuse any issues with age that there may be! Also I’m actually really happy with this one and it made me hella soft writing it so I hope you enjoy! Please remember to like, comment, reblog, send asks and just let me know what you thought of it!

~~ 2008, Age 12 ~~

Y/N’s face was scrunched up with nerves as she waited for the bus to arrive. The previous two days her mother had driven her to school, Y/N too nervous to get the bus in. But then the boy who lived down the street had asked her during school why she didn’t get the bus to school like he did.

Y/N had shyly admitted to the boy - Michael, that was his name - that she was nervous about it.

“You came!” Michael’s grin was wide when he arrived at the bus stop. Y/N’s lips up into a nervous smile and she nodded mutely. “Here!” He thrust a bottle at her. “My mum gave me two orange juices and told me to give the other to Cal but you can have it instead,” Michael gave her an innocent smile and Y/N took the bottle.

“Thank you,” she said nervously but she clammed up again the moment the bus pulled into the stop. 

Michael bounded onto the bus before her, leaving Y/N behind.

“You coming, love?” The bus driver asked, a kind smile on her face. Y/N looked around her, noticing that she was the only child who had yet to get on the bus at her stop and gave an embarrassed, awkward nod of her head.

Her steps were shaky when she stepped onto the bus. She flinched as the door shut behind her. 

It was the typical kind of school bus, the exact same formation as it had been like at her old school at her old home town - the youngest pupils at the front and the eldest at the back.

Y/N was just going into year 7, as was Michael, so she knew that she ought to sit at the front but she didn’t know where.

It was the start of spring term, Y/N having moved house late in the year meaning that she didn’t know anyone other than Michael.

There were some empty seats next to other year 7s but Y/N wasn’t sure whether they’d allow her to sit next to them or not.

“Y/N! Come sit here!” She was relieved to hear Michael’s voice calling to her from one of the three seaters, where he was sat in the middle seat with a friend next to him at the window, an empty seat on the aisle. 

Y/N practically fell into the seat next to Michael, giving him a thankful, exhausted smile.

“This is Calum! We’ve known each other since primary school!” Michael introduced.

“Mike said he gave you my orange juice,” Calum said, looking to Y/N with a hurt expression and her eyes widened, her jaw slackening and she was quick to hold out the juice to him, not wanting to make any enemies in her first week. Calum looked at the bottle before his face broke into a wide grin, shaking his head. “I was just joking.”

“Y/N just moved here,” Michael informed Calum who nodded.

“You’re in my History class, right?” He asked and Y/N’s eyes flashed with recognition and she nodded.

“Yeah,” she confirmed timidly.

“You should sit with me!” He told her and Michael frowned.

“Why aren’t you ever that excited to sit next to me?” He accused his best friend and Y/N couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her.

~~ 2009, Age 13 ~~

“Everything sucks and I want to die,” Y/N looked at Michael for a moment in silence before nodding.

“This is why we don’t talk too much,” she informed him and Michael scoffed.

“So not the reason,” he grumbled.

“No the reason is that Y/N has other friends,” Y/N couldn’t stop herself from smiling when she heard Calum’s voice and she turned around, watching him take the final few steps towards them in the lunch hall.

“I still sit with you guys on the bus every day,” she pointed out and Michael pointed at her with his fork

“Good - don’t you fucking dare forget your roots,” he said through a mouthful of food, making Y/N wrinkle her nose in disgust and she looked over at Calum to see a similar expression on his face. “I’m the only reason you have friends here,” he insisted, shovelling more food into his mouth,

“I forget why I sat with you today,” Y/N said to him.

“Because you knew I’d be here?” Calum offered with a cheesy grin.

“Because we were your best choice since Sandy’s being a bitch?” Michael offered instead and Y/N stuck her tongue out at her friend. “How mature.”

“Fuck you, Mikey.”

“You were nicer when you were anxious all the time.”

Y/N was friends with Calum and Michael - for the first half of term that Y/N was at the school the boys essentially took her under their wing, showing her around the school and introducing her to new people. But after that Y/N made her own friends, a group that ran in similar circles to Calum and Michael but they weren’t one group. 

Despite that, though, they still sat together on the bus every morning and evening and her and Michael still walked to and from the bus stop together. Michael’s mum still provided Y/N and Calum with a bottle of something to drink on the bus in the morning and the three of them did still hang out together, just not as often as they had when Y/N was still a new student.

“Heard you’re planning on trying out for the football team?” Y/N mentioned, looking over at Calum, who had just taken a bite from his sandwich and he nodded, his eyes bright.

“Yeah! Next week!” 

“That’s amazing, Cal!” 

The fluttering in their chests was inevitable, really. 

~~ 2010, Age 14 ~~

Calum looked up, surprised when Y/N slid into the seat next to him on the bus. 

“Mike’s ill,” she said awkwardly. “It’s... I’m still okay to sit here, right?” 

“Of course it’s okay,” Calum laughed and Y/N’s heart skipped a beat at how adorable he looked when he smiled. “Has he just never been sick since you started here?” He questioned and Y/N shrugged.

“I guess so.” 

Silence fell between the two friends for a moment and then Y/N nodded towards Calum’s headphones.

“What’re you listening to?”

“All Time Low,” there was a pause before Calum asked: “want to listen?” 

“Is that okay?”

“You’ve not been this nervous around me since we first met,” Calum informed her and Y/N smiled, moving over into Michael’s usual seat, close enough to Calum so that they could listen to the music together.

“I like this album,” she admitted quietly.

“If you didn’t we’d have serious issues.”

Y/N smiled, glancing at him from the corner of her eye.

“Thanks for letting me listen,” Y/N said when they pulled into school and Calum shrugged.

“I saw you haven’t have yours for a while.”

“Yeah - the dog chewed them up,” she saw Calum’s eyes light up at the mention of her dog.

“How is Alan?” He asked as the two of them got off the bus.

“Misses you, Cal,” she assured, giggling.

“I miss him,” Calum sighed longingly.

“You can come over any time and see him,” Y/N pointed out. Calum smiled at her and nodded.

“I might take you up on that,” silence fell between them as they walked together towards the school.

Normally by this point in the morning Y/N would have left Calum and Michael to seek out her other friends and the two boys would go to the music room or Calum would have an early morning team meeting for football.

But this morning was different - this morning, neither of them wanted to leave the other.

Without Michael there, it was easier to get wrapped up in one another’s presence.

“Hey, can I ask you something?” Calum’s hands were playing nervously with the straps of his bag, refusing to look over at his friend.

“Yeah?”

“Would you maybe wanna see a movie together, or something?” 

“We’re going to see one with Mike this weekend,” Y/N pointed out, laughing a little. “You already asked me, Cal.”

“No! No, i mean... one without him?” Calum offered awkwardly, clearly feeling he had gone too far now to go back on his question. “Like... just the two of us?” Y/N stopped in her tracks, staring wide-eyed at Calum.

“Are you... Cal, are you asking me on a date?” He looked up at last to meet her eyes, anxiety dancing in his. Y/N began to feel her own anxiety building up in her stomach, which was strange, she hadn’t felt nervous around Calum since the day that they first met. “Because... Because if you were,” she spoke again when she realised that Calum wasn’t going to clarify what he meant. “I’d... um I’d like that.”

~~ 2011 Age 15 ~~

“So you’ve found a drummer now?” Y/N asked from her seat in the music room, where she was watching Calum, Michael and their friend Luke tuning their instruments.

“Yeah - Michael found him,” Luke confirmed, giving a shy smile to Calum’s girlfriend.

Luke had been introduced to Y/N a few months ago by Michael and Calum as the guitarist in the band they were forming and yet the two of them were still painfully awkward around one another.

Not for Luke’s lack of trying, he was putting a lot of effort into befriending Y/N but she was constantly nervous when it came to talking to new people, even those who had been so highly talked of by her boyfriend and Michael.

“He’s called Ashton,” Michael supplied before looking to Calum with an unimpressed look on his face. “Don’t you tell your girlfriend anything?”

“No,” Calum shrugged, a smirk growing on his face. “All we talk about is how fucking annoying you are,” Calum looked over at his girlfriend when she snorted with laughter, her hands flying to her mouth in shock from the noise she had just made.

Calum bit his lip to stop himself from laughing and shook his head, affection evident in his actions.

“Well when we hang out we just talk about how much she regrets saying yes to your date,” Michael countered, challenging Calum.

Luke looked over at Y/N.

“Are they...?”

“Yeah,” Y/N filled in nodding with a sigh. “They’re always like this.” 

“Only because Mike’s bitter that I asked out Y/N before he could,” Calum gloated arrogantly and Luke and Y/N burst out into laughter at the look of disgust on Michael’s face.

“Should I be offended that you’re that against dating me, Mike?” The young boy rolled his eyes.

“Whatever - girls have cooties anyway.”

~~ 2012, Age 16 ~~

Y/N was sat on Calum’s bed, watching him pack.

He was chatting away happily to her, eager to tell her all of his plans for exploring London while he was away. Telling her all about the plans that the band had for their debut album that they were planning on recording since their first single and EP had been such a hit.

His eyes were bright and sparkling with excitement as he continued to go on about all of his plans.

Y/N just watched and listened, nodding her head and making noises of agreement whenever it seemed appropriate.

Calum paused for breath, his cheeks flushed with excitement and he turned to face her, his smile so heartbreakingly wide.

“Isn’t it insane?” 

Y/N nodded her head, trying to muster up excitement. Because she was excited. Of course she was excited both for Calum and the rest of the guys.

She had known Calum and Michael since they were all eleven and being in a band, recording albums, touring was all that they had ever dreamed of and now two thirds of that was already coming true and they were only fourteen, fifteen and sixteen.

“I’m really happy for you, Cal,” Y/N confirmed, her voice gentle and a little sad. Calum’s face dropped into a frown and he sat next to her on his bed, his arm resting around her shoulder.

“Everything okay?” 

“Yeah I just... I’m going to miss you,” she admitted, resting her own head on his shoulder.

“We’re not going to be gone for long,” he promised her.

“Come on, Cal, you have to realise by now that you guys are gonna be big, right?” Calum snorted a laugh at that.

“Yeah, well, we’re never going to forget our number one fan.”

“You can’t, Liz is going with you,” Y/N deadpanned, pride filling her chest when Calum started to laugh.

“It’s going to be weird not having you there,” Calum mused. “Who’s going to tell Michael that he sucks on the daily?”

“It’s okay, Cal, an ocean isn’t going to stop me from ensuring Mike’s head doesn’t get too big.”

“Well there’s a relief.”

~~ 2013, Age 17 ~~

“That’s amazing!” Y/N congratulated, amazement and pride filling her chest.

The previous two months had been interesting for them to say the least, with Calum in London with the band song writing and collaborating with other, UK-based artists. 

Y/N missed him - of course she missed the band as well, the three boys who she had become close with since the band had formed and she had met Luke and Ashton, and Michael who she had seen every day since she was twelve - but she wasn’t ashamed to admit she had missed Calum the most.

It was strange. They were so young and yet, they had spent nearing three years of their lives calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. Too young to know about love and yet... that was what this was. Love in its purest, most innocent form.

“I can’t quite believe it,” Calum admitted and even with an ocean between them on a crappy phone connection Y/N could hear his smile. See his expression.

“I’m so proud of you.”

“Want a confession?” Calum asked, just a hint of guilt in his voice but amusement being the overlying tone.

“What?”

“I haven’t told my parents yet,” silence fell over the line for a moment before Y/N burst out laughing.

“Cal!” 

“I’m sorry!” 

“Don’t tell them that you told me first or they’ll be so offended!” 

“I promise,” Calum chuckled.

“You’re still coming home next week, right?” Y/N asked, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen between the two teenagers.

“Yeah,” Calum confirmed. “And on the tour we’ll be playing in Sydney and the One Direction guys promised that they could get you a good ticket.”

“Man... I can’t believe you’re touring with One Direction,” Y/N reiterated and she heard her boyfriend release a long breath on the other side of the line.

“Neither can I,” his voice was a whisper.

“Hate to be that bitch but... I told you you were going to be big.”

“Mum did always say that I should listen to you,” Calum teased, causing Y/N to let out a gentle laugh.

“You can repay me by getting Louis’ autograph.”

Y/N had been joking at the time, but she wasn’t particularly surprised when Calum returned a week later and brought out a prototype shirt for the ‘Take Me Home’ tour which had been signed by all five members of One Direction.

~~ 2014, Age 18 ~~

Y/N’s arms were around Calum the moment he stepped out of the airport gate. Her boyfriend laughed, dropping his bags to the ground and wrapping his arms around her waist, nestling his face into her neck.

“Shit, you’re really here,” she mumbled and Calum’s arms tightened a little. If Y/N didn’t know any better she would have thought he was crying.

“I’m really here,” he confirmed. Y/N went to pull away but Calum wouldn’t let her. “Just give me a second,” he pleaded.

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t want the fans to see I’m crying,” he admitted bashfully and Y/N laughed.

“Calum Hood? Crying?” She teased and Calum laughed, pulling back but only so that he could kiss her for the first time in months.

“Fuck off,” he mumbled, resting their foreheads heavily together.

“I like the hair by the way,” Y/N added. “Very punk rock.”

“You know what I didn’t miss you,” Calum said decisively, pulling away from her, but the smile on his lips contrasted his words entirely.

“I wasn’t joking! I do like it!” She promised, her hands reaching up to gently comb through the curls. Calum’s face softened and he ducked down to kiss her again.

“I’m so glad I’m home,” he confessed and Y/N laughed a little into his mouth.

“I am too - but I’m sure your family is as well,” she pointed out.

When Calum went to go greet his parents, Joy pulling him into a bone crushing hug, Michael’s arms slipped around Y/N’s shoulders, pulling her into his chest.

“Miss me?” He asked and Y/N laughed, turning around to hug her friend. 

“It’s so good to see you all again!”

“Is that us included?” Ashton piped up, looking over to Michael and Y/N with raised eyebrows.

“Not you.” Ashton giggled and walked over, wrapping his arms around Y/N and Michael, who were still hugging. Luke was swift to join in. “You guys stink!” Y/N groaned, wrinkling her nose in distaste.

“Bloody rude,” Ashton commented as the three bandmates released her.

Calum reached over and interlaced their fingers, pulling Y/N back to his side.

“You two ready to go for food?” Joy asked, a knowing look sent to the couple. Calum pressed his lips to Y/N’s forehead and nodded.

~~ 2015, Age 19 ~~

“I’ve missed this,” Calum admitted, the two of them walking down the road, their hands linked together, swinging slightly where they hung between them. Y/N’s dog, Alan, was bounding down the road in front of them, knowing the path to the park well, able to quite contentedly lead the way, the couple following him.

“Yeah? You over your rockstar life already?” Y/N teased, squeezing Calum’s hand and he let out a soft laugh at her question, shaking his head.

“You’re really annoying sometimes, you know? Like, honestly, every time I even try and be cute you have to go and ruin it.”

“You trying to be cheesy and cute makes me uncomfortable because you’ve always been a bit of a shit to me,” Y/N told him, a serious expression on her face, which cracked the moment Calum shot her an offended look.

“It’s one hundred percent the other way around,” Calum grumbled.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Y/N scoffed.

“You and Ash have been taking the piss out of me ever since you first got introduced,” Calum claimed.

“Yeah - thanks for introducing us, by the way. I love Ash,” Calum burst out laughing at her tone, tugging on her hand to bring her closer so that he could kiss her temple.

“I’d say ‘you’re welcome’ but I do think that it’s the dumbest move I’ve ever made.”

Silence fell between them again as they followed Alan into the park. The outing made both Y/N and Calum feel somewhat nostalgic - walking Alan together around the park was something that they had done as dates since they got together and before they were together Michael would also join them after school.

Of course, all the band had tagged along at some point or another when Y/N went to walk her family dog but it was Calum’s favourite thing for them to do as a casual date - Y/N was insistent that it was because he preferred Alan to her, to which Calum never responded to other than to laugh.

“I’ve missed this too,” she finally confirmed, gently squeezing his hand again. “Walking Alan’s just not the same without you.”

~~ 2016, Age 20 ~~

“I’m so in love with you,” Calum’s words were whispered into Y/N’s hair. Calum’s arms were wrapped tightly around her, keeping her safe and secure, as close to him as he could physically manage to keep her.

A secret between the two of them. So much of his life now was public, had been since he was sixteen. Y/N and their relationship was the one thing now that felt private, that made him feel safe.

Even his friendship with Michael, the one he had had for as long as he could remember, was in the public eye, no longer with the privacy of inside jokes to hide behind. 

He wasn’t sure what he’d do if he lost Y/N.

And he almost had.

Or at least, he thought he had.

Y/N had flown out to stay with him and the other guys on tour, having just finished university for the year and having the whole summer to do whatever she wanted, until she had to go back for the start of term in late September.

It was the first time she had been with him for anything other than the Australian leg of the tour and the two of them had been looking forward to it, planning it for months.

But it had all come crashing down so quickly.

Y/N wasn’t used to the same lifestyle as Calum anymore. She was used to the paparazzi following them around home occasionally, fans coming up and asking for pictures when they were together but nothing could have prepared her for tour.

Everything was publicised, all the time. Nothing felt private anymore. Y/N had never felt so exposed in her whole life and she despised it.

Y/N had panicked. They had gotten separated in a crowd of fans and Y/N had had a full blown panic attack, which Calum hadn’t seen happen because he was the other side of the crowd, taking photos. Ashton had found her and brought her safely back to the bus, where she had sat shaking with nervous energy, waiting for the boys to return.

Calum was the first through the door to the tour bus, rushing over to his girlfriend, eyes wide with worry as he tried to get a grasp on her mental state.

Y/N had assured him she was fine and Calum hated himself for dragging her into this kind of life, which she had never asked for.

“I love you too, Cal,” Y/N promised, nuzzling closer to him. They had taken themselves off to their bunk early, wanting to recover from the stress of the day. Normally they would at least pretend for a little while that they would be sleeping in separate bunks to avoid the teasing of their friends but they were both unwilling to leave the others side after the previous events.

“But... are you sure this is what you want?” Y/N rolled over so that she was hovering on top of him and if Calum hadn’t been caught up in his own thoughts and fears about their relationship he would be astounded by how gorgeous he thought she looked.

“Cal, I’ve loved you since we were thirteen... I’m not... of course this is what I want,” she settled on, leaning down to kiss him gently. “You’re what I want.”

“But this... this isn’t what you agreed to when we first started going out,” he pointed out, gesturing with his free hand around them at the tour bus and he watched as Y/N just shrugged.

“No - but it’s what I signed up for now, Cal... you can’t get rid of me that easily.”

~~ 2017, Age 21 ~~

“It’s nice that you’re finally taking a break,” Y/N mentioned, watching Calum bustle around his kitchen from her place sat on top of the breakfast bar.

Y/N normally did most of the cooking when they were together - she would joke about the only reason Calum inviting her down to spend her holidays with him was because she would cook for him.

But this morning, Calum had insisted on cooking her breakfast. Y/N had put up little fight and allowed Calum to do as he pleased, deciding on cooking pancakes for the two of them.

“Yeah - it gives us the time to actually properly think about this album, you know?” Y/N nodded in understanding. She knew how hectic the past few years for Calum and the band had been and she knew that they weren’t necessarily with all the songs they released as they could be had they just had a little more time.

It was also nice for them to be taking some extra time off and to themselves because it meant that she got to see Calum more with him flying himself to her university, her being able to get to LA and it was nice being able to see him so much.

“Okay, so I know it’s early to be asking this,” Calum stated, turning around with two plates of pancakes in hand. He stopped short though when he saw where Y/N was sat. “Can’t you just sit at a chair like a normal person for once in your life?” He sighed and Y/N laughed, moving off of the counter and taking a plate from Calum, pecking his lips.

“Thank you for breakfast,” she responded, sitting at the table. Calum rolled his eyes and sat opposite her.

“As I was saying,” he went back to his previous train of thought, shaking his head a little at his girlfriend’s antics, adoration swimming in his eyes. “I was thinking about us,” Y/N froze. She knew those words were almost never good. Calum picked up on her sudden nerves and reached over the table to grab her hand, rubbing his thumb over the back of it as he knew always soothed her. “Nothing bad, baby, I promise. Nothing bad,” he prefaced and Y/N nodded, letting out the breath she had been holding.

“If you say it’s nothing bad and now break up with me I’m going to kick your ass, Hood.” She mumbled, listening to Calum start to laugh.

“What I was going to ask is if you want to move in together when you’re done with uni?” Silence fell between them for a moment and Y/N nodded hesitantly.

“I do...”

“Is there a but?” Calum asked, his heart sinking at her expression. Y/N grimaced a little.

“I’m... where would we live? I... I’m not sure I want to live in LA, Cal.” 

Calum moved his hand in hers so that they were holding hands more properly and he squeezed it gently.

“Hey, that’s okay - we’ll figure it out, yeah? Reach a compromise?” Y/N nodded again, a nervous smile forming on her face.

“Then yeah - lets do it.” Calum beamed, leaning right across the table so that he could kiss her.

The couple were broken out of their bubble by the sound of Calum’s apartment door opening and gasps of delight coming from his band members, who just regularly invited themselves around.

“Nice! You made pancakes!”

~~ 2018 Age 22 ~~

Y/N shifted from foot to foot in front of Ashton’s house, waiting for him to answer the door. 

She had gotten a call from Calum about an hour ago during work, imploring her to come over the moment she was finished because he missed her.

Luke had taken the phone from him pretty quickly and insisted she bring alcohol with her as they were running out at Ashton’s house.

As Luke spoke to her, Y/N could hear Calum complaining in the background, which had made her laugh. 

Calum always was a clingy drunk.

“Oh thank fuck you’re here!” Michael exclaimed, reaching out of the door and pulling Y/N inside.

“You good, Mike?”

“Cal’s being complaining about you not being here for hours,” Michael groaned, dragging Y/N behind him into the kitchen.

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the scene in front of her. It had turned into a small party in Ashton’s kitchen. Calum, Luke, Ashton and Michael all had dazed looks in their eyes, their smiles slightly dopy and their laughs just a little too hysterical.

Sierra and Crystal were also in the kitchen, sat at Ashton’s bar with drinks in front of them, watching the band members in amusement.

“It’s literally half past five and they’re hammered,” Y/N stated, joining the two girls, who laughed, nodding their heads in agreement.

“They were smashed after the first video,” Sierra contributed.

“Well... Mike and Luke definitely were,” Crystal mused. “I think Cal and Ash hung on until the second.”

“Y/N!” Calum’s voice broke through the room and Y/N turned around, raising her eyebrows at her boyfriend, who had raised his arms, eyes bright in delight as they fixed on her.

“Cal you’re in the middle of filming!” Y/N pointed out.

“I don’t care! Come here!” He pleaded but Y/N shook her head.

“Not drunk enough for that, babe,” she told her and Calum’s eyes slipped over to Sierra and Crystal, pointing at them seriously.

“Get her drunk so she’ll come on camera - need to show her off,” Calum took another drink and Y/N turned back to the girls.

“Okay at what point do we need to cut them off?”

~~ 2019 Age 23 ~~

“You okay?” Y/N asked when Calum flopped onto the sofa next to her on the tour bus, resting her free hand in his hair as she continued to scroll through her phone.

“Yeah,” Calum sighed, nuzzling closer to her. “Glad you’re here.”

“I promised, didn’t I?” Y/N pointed out, gently running her fingers down his cheek. “Couldn’t let you spend our anniversary alone,” she teased.

“I’m sorry we’re stuck on the bus for it,” he sighed but Y/N just shrugged.

“I don’t mind, Cal - plus, lets be honest, even if we weren’t stuck on the tour bus, the guys would find a way to crash our plans. They always do.”

It was true. Calum and Y/N had never managed to have an anniversary where it was just the two of them. Every year at least one of them would crash it and invite themselves along to whatever it was that the couple were doing. When they moved in together they had been hopeful of spending a quiet anniversary together at their home with just Duke for company.

It had been a vain hope and both Luke and Ashton had invited themselves along to their movie night.

By this stage, Y/N and Calum were pretty much certain that they just did it to annoy them.

This year, Y/N had booked off two weeks from work months in advance so that she could join Calum on tour and Calum when he was looking at the dates for the tour had done his best to ensure that they could spend their anniversary in a hotel rather than on the move so that they could go on a real celebration to a fancy restaurant.

Unfortunately, at the last minute there had been a change in the tour and more dates had been added, meaning that they were spending the night of their anniversary on the tour bus, Calum having spent the day doing promo with the band and the Chainsmokers.

“Yeah I know,” Calum sighed. “Guess I just wished this year had been different,” he admitted. Y/N’s smile softened and she put her phone to the side, ducking down to kiss him.

“Nine years, Cal - that’s quite a while,” she mused and Calum nodded in agreement. “Having any doubts?” She teased and Calum reached his hand up to curl around her neck, ensuring that she remained close enough for him to kiss her again.

“With you? Never.”

~~ 2020 Age 24 (almost) ~~

Calum’s arms wrapped around her from behind, his face nestling into the crook of her neck.

“What’re you doing up?” He mumbled.

“Jet lag,” Y/N sighed, relaxing back into his arms a little bit.

They had only recently flown back home to their LA apartment (Y/N had given in to his pleads for them to move to LA, understanding that it was where Calum needed to be) from spending the time with their families in Australia.

“Could’ve woken me,” he told her and Y/N chuckled lightly.

“I know - but you need sleep, Cal,” she turned around in his arms, wrapping her arms back around him. 

“I need good sleep - I only sleep well with you,” he told her, not a hint of untruth in his voice, just telling her what he honestly felt. “Been an issue since we first shared a bed when we were sixteen.” 

“Sorry to ruin your sleep like that,” she giggled when she heard Calum’s breath against her neck, laughing.

“What were you doing anyway?”

“Just on Instagram,” Y/N shrugged. “Looking through my tagged.”

“Anything interesting?” Calum asked, practically dragging Y/N over to the chair situated on their balcony, sitting down first and pulling Y/N on top of him in an attempt to keep himself warm.

“Everyone wishing us happy anniversary,” Y/N told him.

“Our anniversary was months ago,” Calum pointed out, blinking his bleary eyes to focus them on her screen.

“I haven’t been on in a while,” she admitted. “Stalked you for a bit as well.” She mused. “Liked the post you put up for our anniversary,” Y/N added and Calum chuckled.

“You really haven’t been on in a while.”

“It was cute,” she told him, turning around and cuddling closer to his chest.

“Thought you were gonna hate me from putting up photos from when we were fourteen.”

“As Mike would say,” Y/N cleared her throat. “I would never forget my fucking roots,” she said, a poor imitation of Michael’s accent sending Calum into fits of laughter.

“That was awful,” he told her as he tried to catch his breath aain.

“It made you laugh,” Y/N shrugged, looking up at him, a softness in her eyes that was reserved purely for him.

Calum felt privileged in the knowledge that it had been for him and only him to see ever since they were fourteen. To know that no one else had ever seen that look directed towards them.

“That’s all I ever really want to do,” she promised.

“I love you so much,” Calum whispered. He took her hand and placed it over his chest. “This beats for you,” he brought the hand up to his lips, pressing a kiss to each finger and went back to kiss her ring finger again. “We’ve been together almost ten years and I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”

“Cal...”

“This isn’t an official proposal,” Calum prefaced, shaking his head. “Not yet - the ring isn’t ready yet,” Y/N’s eyes widened and Calum’s lips perked up at the reaction. “Didn’t you think I was going to propose?”

“I mean, I guess,” Y/N shrugged and Calum kissed her, their lips moving together in a way that was so comforting and normal for them.

“So it’s not an official proposal until I get the ring,” their foreheads were pressed heavily together, breathing into one another’s mouths. “But I just needed - need - you to know that I want to marry you. And...” Calum trailed off, seeming to loose some confidence.

“Whenever you’re ready, Cal,” Y/N vowed, kissing him again. “Whenever you’re ready to ask, I’m ready to say yes.”

Before you go: If you enjoyed this fic and want some more of it, check my blurb masterlist under 5sos blurbs and there you can find any spinoff blurbs I have done for this fic :)

#courts writings #fics #5 seconds of summer #calum hood #calum hood fanfiction #calum hood imagine #calum hood x reader #calum hood fanfic #calum hood fluff #calum hood imagines #calum hood x you #5 seconds of summer fanfiction #5 seconds of summer imagine