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ohtobeleah · 1 year

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Chronos // Robert Bob Floyd

Summary: Bob told you that Chronos carried a sickle, that he used it to cut a hole, a tear in the cosmos between heaven and earth. Chronos did that to separate this world from the next, to separate the known from the unknown.

And while someone by the name of Pete Mitchell told you over the phone that your husband had been involved in a training accident….Well—you felt as if you'd fallen straight into it.

Warnings: Bob Floyd x Pregnant F!reader. F-18 accident. Medical inaccuracies. Birth. Bob Whump, ANGST. Major character death.

Word Count: 6.1k

Author Note: Today is Monday, for most of you it’s Sunday: Please enjoy this oneshot that’s been a work in progress since the 28th of March. ~ Last minute title name change. I’m posting this at 4am my time so blow this up.

First there was a storm of carbon and molten rock which begat granite and soil. Then, the land shook and it cracked and it rose till it spiked the sky. Forest grew and died and grew a hundred times again. And then people grew and died and grew and died a hundred times again. There were storms and seasons and fences and blood. Wonder and vengeance and a whole lot of regret….

And through every grievance, every war, the land and the sky didn't give two shits about any of it. Bob Floyd knew that as he and his front seater, Natasha Phoenix Trance, fell through the sky in a tin bird designed by man, for man to destroy other men….

That it wouldn't give two shits about them either.

“Extinguishing right engine!” There were far too many sounds coming from every system possible as Phoenix tried to regain control of the F-18 that seemed impossible to wrangle. All Bob could think about in those utterly terrifying moments was you.

He’d always made it a promise to come home to you. He knew how much you worried about him, how much the thought of being left behind ping ponged around in your brain. How sometimes you'd stay up all hours of the night hoping that wherever he was and whatever ocean he flew across that he was okay. That he was safe and that he;d come home to you.

Robert Floyd had made you a promise he had every intention of keeping, but he wasn't so sure he could.

“Phoenix, Bob! Punch out! Punch out!” Maverick shouted through the comms as he chased the rogue fighter jet down. Bob looked around at all the warnings flashing in his face, there was nothing left to save except themselves.

“Phoenix there’s warning lights everywhere, we’re in hydraulic failure!” All Bob prayed for in those terrifying moments as his colleagues watched on in pure shock horror from the ground below was that he’d get a chance to tell you he loved you again.

He always told you that he’d come home, that there wasn’t a chance in hell that he wouldn’t. You knew better than to believe Government Property though, Bob knew you knew that there was always a chance. So he promised in the event of his untimely demise that he’d come back to you and wiggle your earlobe. To let you know he made it safe and sound. That you need not worry about him anymore.

You promised him the same thing, because working from home was just as terrifying as flying a multimillion dollar fighter jet.

“I can’t control it!” But as the ground grew closer and closer, Bob knew he wasn’t ready to die, he wasn’t ready to leave you behind and he certainly wasn’t ready to not meet his unborn child.

“We’re going down, Phoenix! We’re going in! We’re going in!” He wasn’t ready to wiggle your ear.

“You can’t save it! eject, eject!” Maverick shouted again, he was watching on like he’d been sucked into some kind of timeloop. He’d seen this happen before. Only he lost his best friend when to this day he thought it should have been him.

“Eject! Eject! Eject!” Were the last three words Bob heard escape from Phoenix’s mouth before he was reaching between his legs to pull at the emergency yellow and black striped handle that sent him flying out of the cockpit. He’d been taught how to handle a situation like this, they all had. Every single naval aviator currently on active duty had been taught what to do when they needed to eject.

But when Bob's head hit the top of the cockpit? He didn’t care for procedures and protocol and what he should or shouldn’t have done in the moment, all he cared about was you and holding on to whatever consciousness he had left as he tumbled through the sky at a rapid pace. Reaching for his parachute in just the nic of time.

Knowing if he hit the ground where the land had shook and cracked and rose till it spiked the sky that it wouldn’t have given a shit. It wouldn’t have been all that forgiving and it certainly wouldn’t have mourned his untimely demise.

So Bob faught until he hit the ground with a not so graceful thud, he hit the ground hard—with an almighty groan as his ribs popped and his head throbbed inside his helmet.

“Ahhh!” He gasped as he clutched at his stomach, forgetting how to breathe as the darkness of tunnel vision claimed its next victim. Unconsciousness overcoming its latest casualty:

Bob Floyd.

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~

Bob had asked you once when you were wrapped up in his arms in the dead of the night, listening to the storm raging on outside if you knew anything at all about a Greek God called Chronos. When you had chuckled out a soft no as his lips trailed up your neck and his slightly calloused hands roamed your body like they knew every inch, Bob told you that he carried a sickle, that he used it to cut a hole, a tear in the cosmos between heaven and earth. Chronos did that to separate this world from the next, to separate the known from the unknown.

And while someone by the name of Pete Mitchell told you over the phone that your husband had been involved in a training accident….

Well—you felt as if you'd fallen straight into it.

You felt like you'd fallen into the cosmic existence between now and soon to come, plummeting into a realm where time didn’t exist and light didn’t reach. You tumbled into a parallel dimension where nothing made sense, nothing seemed tangible or real. You descended into a world where Bob Floyd wasn’t around.

“Your husband was involved in an accident during a training exercise this afternoon—“.

At the sound of Pete Maverick Mitchell’s voice explaining that there had been an accident on base during an exercise—you begun to crack, you started slipping further and further into the unknown because Bob had always said he’d never leave and if he did you’d feel him tugging on your earlobe to let you know he got there safe and sound.

There was no one tugging on your earlobe though, no soul that had passed on or ghostly figure watching over you. What there was though, was a radiating warmth between your legs. A wetness that shouldn't have been there.

Had your water just broken?

“Oh—oh god.” You gasped as you looked down, gripping the side of the kitchen island as you groaned out a prolonged, primal moan. You were in labour there was no doubt about it. “Ahh.”

“Mrs Floyd? Are you alright?” The voice on the other end of the line asked with a confused undertone as you watched the seconds tick past on the ongoing call.

“I uh—“ You tried to speak, tried to make sense of what you were hearing, what you were experiencing. Pain in every aspect both physically, emotionally and mentally. “I think my water just broke.”

“Oh—“ Maverick couldn’t suppress his shock nor could he disguise his sudden state of disbelief. “Oh okay, I’ll uh—I'll have an ambulance come by right away.” You replied with a sharp groan. Doubling over as you felt how hard your stomach had truly become. This was happening, everything was happening all at once and you had lost focus in the pain of both worrying about the state your husband was currently in and the fact your baby was on their way. “Mrs Floyd, someone will be there very soon, I’m gonna stay on the line with you until they arrive.”

“I need Bob—“ You’d begun to cry as you kneeled on the kitchen floor before you decided that sitting up against the cabinet with your legs outstretched felt a hell of a lot more comfortable. “I need my husband, I can't do this without him.” You felt warm tears streaming down your cheeks as your bottom lip quivered and another painful contraction rippled through your body. Every fibre of your being ignited in a fireball. “Ahhh—I won’t do this without my husband!”

On the other side of the phone call that had taken a rather drastic turn, Mav looked to Phoenix who was being wheeled into the awaiting ambulance on the tarmac. Bob was next, Pete didn’t have the heart to tell the Weapons Systems Officer that had just escaped death that his wife, who he hadn’t mentioned to a soul beside Phoenix, that his wife’s water had just broken.

“Phoenix, hey—“ Pete stopped the medics briefly, they looked at Pete like he was risking her life by wasting valuable time. But this was just as important. “What’s Bob's wife’s name?” Pete wanted to know so he could be a little more personal.

The truth was Natasha didn’t even know, she’d seen the picture of you in Bob's wallet that he’d shown her, but Bob had only ever called you by your nickname. Bob's beloved term of endearment.

Peach.

“He’s only ever called her Peach, I don’t even know her name.” Phoenix cried. She was still trying to process what had happened—she felt like the blame was all her own to bear. She’d damn near killed her back seater and she didn’t even know his wife’s real name or that you were pregnant. “I nearly killed him and I don’t even know his wife’s name—“

“Hey hey hey.” Mav tried to soothe the clearly shocked pilot. “It wasn’t your fault, it could’ve happened to anyone, Phoenix.” Mav smiled softly as he held the phone back to his ear, he was still yet to call Phoenix's emergency contact, her sister Lily. It wasn’t inherently Mavericks' job to call the emergency contacts listed in Bob and Phoenix’s files, but it was his duty, his responsibility.

He was going to as soon as he’d informed you, however, Pete wasn’t expecting this call to take the turn it had. “Peach, you there?”

There was no answer, Simply whimpers. When you’d doubled over in pain in the kitchen you’d left your phone on the island bench top. It was far too out of reach now as you sat trying to breathe through the latest contraction that bodied you.

“Peach—“ Mav started, but as he did so saw the medics wheeling Bob closer and closer to the ambulance waiting on the tarmac. He couldn’t say anything, not when Bob was still fighting to stay conscious. “Mrs Floyd, someone will be there as soon as they can, I promise.”

“Bbboooooobb—!” You cried out. “I can’t do this!” It was all too much for you to handle, the immense pressure, the anxiety, the fear of losing your husband. “I can’t fucking do this!” You never thought in your wildest dreams you’d have to do this alone. Bob always said he’d be right with you every single step of the way. And up until right now he had been.

“Someone’s coming Peach.” Maverick knew you couldn’t hear him, but he couldn’t bring himself to put the phone down. He looked at Bob being wheeled into the back of the ambulance on a stretcher, wondering if his decision to not say anything as of right now was a bad decision. He seemed to always be full of those.

“Someone’s coming—“

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~

By the time Bob was brought back to the North Island Base Hospital, he was very aware that someone would need to call his emergency contact about what had happened. Someone was going to need to call you, he thought it would be best if he was the one who called.

With a throbbing headache and a few cuts and gashes, Bob let the nurses and doctors tend to his aid without much of a fight. He knew he needed the care, knew it was for the best if he just let everyone do their jobs. He wasn't going anywhere anytime soon and if he put up a fight they would only keep him admitted for longer.

“You got a partner Robert? A wife or husband that we need to call?” Doctor Austin asked as he shined a light into Bob's eyes, watching carefully as he followed the light side to side.

“I have a wife–” Bob mumbled, his head hurt from when he’d hit the ground not so gracefully but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle as he sat up on the hospital bed with his legs hanging off the side. Phoenix was laying with an ice pack over her eyes on the other bed. “She’s um, she's pregnant, could go any day now.” Doctor Austin chuckled as he clicked his pen light off and placed it into his top pocket. Sending Bob an all knowing look.

“And you thought it was a good idea to fall outta the sky?” Bob's ribs hurt when he laughed softly, cupping at his side as he did so, laughing with the doctor who had cleared him and Natasha of any serious injury. “My good man, I can't say that's a good mix.” But there were still observations that needed to be made and a few more tests just to be sure. He wasn't out of the woods.

“Yeah I think you might be right doc—“ Bob smiled softly. “But can I be the one to call her? She’ll probably take the news a little better if she heard it from me.”

“I’ll see what I can do Lieutenant.” Doctor Austin nodded as he picked up his charts and headed out of the room, leaving Phoenix and Bob in the heavy silence of the aftermath of their near death experience.

“What’s her name?” Phoenix mumbled from behind the ice pack she kept over her eyes.

“Y/n—“ Bob replied softly as he played with the wedding band that was strung through his dog tags. “We’ve been together since high school.”

“Why do you call her Peach?”

“Because she’s as sweet as the peaches from the orchard my grandma used to own.” Bob couldn’t stop himself from bashfully blushing, a hume all consuming crept across the apples of his cheeks whenever he spoke about you. “We’re about to have a baby, the detachment was meant to be my last before I could access my paternity leave entitlements.”

“Rough last assignment—“ Phoenix chuckled as she shook her head in disbelief. Bob agreed silently, it was a rough last assignment. “You don’t talk about her an awful lot do you?”

“I would—“ Bob pressed his lips together. “Just no one really asked.” It was then that Phoenix realised that she didn’t know an awful lot about the man who had gone down with her. The man who sat behind her and had her back in the sky. Her WSO. “And I guess we’re not here for all that long anyway so I just kept her to myself, she’s a nice reminder that even after the rough days we’ve been having I get to go home, safe and in one piece to the woman I love.”

“Do you guys know what your having?” Phoenix didn't mean to pry, but she felt an overwhelming pressure to get to know the person she had been flying with since being requested for this detachment. Bob shook his head in response.

“Nah, we wanted to keep it a surprise.” Just as Bob was finishing his sentences Doctor Austin returned, his face looked all kinds of pale and worry was written in the deep lines across his forehead.

“Lieutenant Floyd it looks as if your wife was just admitted into the maternity ward—“ Bob's heart stopped beating inside his chest as he listened to Doctor Austin. “It appears that she was contacted earlier about your accident and the shock sent her into labour—“

“I uh—I need to see her.” Bob mumbled as he slid off the exam bed and nearly fell to the floor. His knees were so weak from the shock and adrenaline from the accident and now the realisation that he was about to be a first time dad. “I need to see my wife, where is she?”

“Lieutenant, I know this must be a stressful situation for you but I really advise against leaving until we’ve finished with your own test. We still need to get you in for—“

“I won’t miss the birth of my baby.” Bob shook his head in defiance. “No, I won’t leave her to do that alone, she needs me—I know she does because I know how scared she is about doing this alone.”

“Robert—“

“No no you have to listen to me. I can't let her do this alone because I’ve heard her cry about it in the middle of the night.” Phoenix's heart shattered into a million pieces as she watched Bob plead with the doctor and the nurses that had come in to try and subdue him. “She’s scared I won’t come back one day and today was almost that day and now she’s giving birth to our baby alone after I promised I’d be here for her—“

“We can’t let you go, it would be against all my medical advice.” Doctor Austin tried to explain. “I understand the difficulty of the situation Mr Floyd but your health and wellbeing is our number one priority.”

“But you have to let me!! That’s my wife! She needs me! Please—“ You needed your husband, things weren’t travelling all that well in the delivery room. You weren’t ready to have this baby—not if Bob wasn’t there with you. Not if Bob had left you behind, he was too young to die. He couldn’t leave you here by yourself to raise a baby, his baby, on your own. He promised he wouldn’t.

“Mrs Floyd, you are going to have this baby.”

“Aahhhhhh! I’m not doing this without my husband!” You groaned out. You were covered in sweat and crying your heart out as one of the labour and delivery nurses held your hand and placed a cool washcloth to your forehead. “I won’t have this baby without him, do you understand me!”

“Someone needs to contact her husband—“ Everyone from the King of England to the Hounds of Hell could hear you screaming. It had been a rather quiet day for the L&D department. Until the ambulance had brought you in.

“We can’t reach him, but I’ll try again.” One of the intern labour and delivery nurses replied as she rushed out of the room, she sprinted towards the nurses station in a hurry. So fast she almost went straight past it, she came to a halt with a flustered sigh.“I need you to try contacting Mr Floyd again, his wife won’t cooperate—she’s refusing to give birth to this baby without him.”

“She knows how having a baby works doesn’t she?” One of the older nurses sitting at the desk rolled her eyes. “That baby, no matter the circumstances, isn’t going to wait for anyone.”

“I’ll let the L&D ward know you’re here as a patient but that’s the best I can do at this stage Lieutenant, I can’t in good conscience let you leave this ward without having run through all the proper medical procedures to make sure you’re fit to return to work.” Doctor Austin wasn’t trying to be the bay guy, if anything he wanted nothing more than to send Bob on his way—but he couldn’t, he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night knowing he didn’t do his job to the best of his ability. “My primary priority is you and Miss Trance here.”

“You don’t understand!” Bob ran his hands through his hair as his bottom lip quivered. He was holding back tears as he looked up to the ceiling—begging whatever God up there that saved him this morning to work just a little more magic. “She won’t have this baby without me, that was the deal—I needed to be there and now that I’m not—“

“She can’t not have the baby Robert.” Doctor Austin sighed, that was the moment Bob knew he needed out. He needed to get to you, he needed to be there by your side and whisper how beautiful and strong and amazing you are for being a whole person into this world. Because if there was one thing you were, it was strong willed, and you weren't going to have this baby without him. That was a promise. “I’ll go talk with L&D and I’ll be right back.”

“Tell my wife I’m here!” Bob shouted as Doctor Austin left the room, Bob felt like he couldn’t breathe. There was a pressure mounting inside his chest, like an elephant was perched upon his chest. “I’m—I’m here.” He broke. Tears streamed down his grazed cheeks as Phoenix hobbled over. She’d done a little damage to herself but nothing a little rest and recovery couldn’t fix.

They were lucky—oh so lucky.

“She's gonna be okay.” Natasha tried her best to comfort the Weapons System Officer she hardly knew, but Bob was long gone. He’d fallen deep into that hole, the one that the Greek God Chronos had created to separate this life from the next one. He was falling through a helpless paradox of anxiety and fear. You were about to give birth and he was going to miss it. As he crouched down as a whale of pain escaped his parted lips, Bob wished for nothing more than to reverse time.

Because if he could just simply reserve time then he wouldn’t have gone into work this morning. And none of this would be happening.

***~***~***~****~***~****~****~***

“Desmond, she’s not doing well, at all.” Lily, one of your delivery nurses, pleaded with Bob's doctor to just let him come to your aid. “She thinks he’s dead, something about an accident he was in this morning.”

“F-18 ejection, he hit the ground pretty hard.” Doctors Austin looked in at you on the bed, in the middle of active labour, fighting every urge you had to push. You weren’t having this baby, not without Bob, the love of your life, your best friend, your husband. “He’s fine, but he’s in for observation overnight and I’m still waiting for his result to come back from his MRI.”

“If she doesn’t see her husband soon she’s going to need an emergency c-section and I for one am not about to place a panicked mother to be under the knife unless it’s critical.” Lily was your voice of reason. You couldn’t plead with Doctor Austin to let your husband go yourself so she did it for you. “If your patient can walk, hold his wife’s hand while she delivers their child and can sign a waiver saying he waved all medical advice then send him down here before she loses this baby.”

“You L&D ladies think you know everything—“

“Just bring me her damn husband before it’s too late.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~**

Bob felt like he’d been condemned to some eternal hell, time froze as the walls of the hospital room he sat in with Phoenix grew closer and closer. He felt claustrophobic for the first time in a long time.

“How did the two of you meet?” Phoenix tried to keep Bob's mind from going to places too dark to fathom. He needed a distraction from the fact he was here with her and you were delivering his child. All alone.

“I was never good at history, she was my partner for this assessment we had in ancient history class once, everyone was doing their research on Pompeii but not Peach.” Bob chuckled to himself at the memory. “No she wanted to do Herculaneum and it turned out to be the only project I ever got an A on for that class.” You were just it for Bob. There was something special about your aura. Your ability to draw him close like a moth entranced by a flame. You took his breath away every time you told him you loved him.

Your love sent Bob's heart clear out of this world.

“We kinda just never left each other's side since then.” Bob explained as he sat against the wall on the floor with his elbows on his knees. “She’s always been so supportive of what I do even though I know it scares her more than anything to see me walk out that door every morning and she worries endlessly whenever I’m deployed.”

“Becoming she loves you.” Phoenix wished she knew a love like Bobs, but her time hadn’t come yet. Bob nodded along as he twirled his wedding band around his finger as it hung from his dog tags.

“Because she loves me.”

“Floyd—“ Doctor Austin made his presence known as he chucked Bob a blue hospital gown and cap. “Put those on, sign this form that says you're going against my professional medical advice and follow me, you’re needed in labour and delivery.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~

“Push! Y/n dear you need to push—!” Lily tried to persuade you to push when your next contraction hit but you were too far gone. You weren’t ready to be a mother, not without Bob there to be a father.

“No! No, I'm not having this baby!” It was the hardest thing to hear as Bob came racing down the hall, his entire body ached from bruises, his head felt heavy on his shoulders from his concussion. But he was okay, he was alive. “I’m not! I won’t! I can’t do this without him!” You cried out in pain as you fought the urge to push, you swore your teeth were about to crush under the force of you clenching. A scream so heartbreaking and primal ripped through you as your body began to betray you. You were fighting nature's course and it wasn’t going well.

“She needs to push—she’s losing too much blood.” One of the nurses stated as a matter of factly just as Bob made it to the door. He froze at the sight of you, how could you look so beautiful in so much pain? He thought he was going to pass out as he took steady, slow steps into the room.

“I’m here—“ Bob cooed as he came up to your beside. “I’m here Peach I’m here.”

“Bob?” You turned in a delirious state to where your husband's voice had come from. “No no I thought you—“

“I’m okay.” He smiled as he bent over to kiss your forehead and splay his hand on top of your head to push your hair away from your face. “I’m here, I told you I’d be here didn’t I?”

“I thought you died, I thought you were in an accident?” You could barely focus, you felt so light headed that the world felt like it was spinning. “I thought—“

“Hey, hey you need to push alright? You can push now baby because I’m here and I’m with you and I’m fine.” Bob reassured you as you sobbed and nodded as he kissed your lips softly and held your hand. “You’re so strong, you’re so brave, and I love you so much, please push mama.”

“This baby is coming whether you're ready or not Mrs Floyd so I’m gonna need you to focus so we can get this baby out.” Lily rounded the bed as she positioned herself between your legs. Bob felt you tighten your grip around his head and everything stopped. Time stood still, your screams were all but drowned out by the excitement and fear in Bob's heart.

“Yes, Y/n good job. I can see bubs head you’re doing so well! Oh your next contraction I need you to push until I tell you to stop.” Lily smiled as you let your head fall back against the bed.

“You’ve been telling me to push and now you don’t want me to push!?” You hissed. Bob couldn’t help but to chuckle. He was so amazed by your strength.

“Yep, that’s exactly what I’m telling you.” Lily chuckled. She knew you were close, barreling towards another contraction. She could see it. “Alright this is the one mama, big push for me and bubs will be here in no time.”

“Bob! It hurts! Make it stop!” You cried out, Bob wished he could take all your pain and experience it himself. He never wanted to see you in such a state, but your baby was coming, the baby you’d made together. You’d created together late one night or in the early hours of the morning he wasn’t too sure. But what he was sure of was that you could do this. “It hurts!!”

“Push Mrs Floyd!” Lily shouted.

“Come on peach push! push!” Bob willed you on as you did. You shouted and cried and squeezed your husband’s hand so hard he thought you were about to break his damn hand. But this was it. Your baby was coming.

“Okay okay the heads out stop!” Lily guided you as you let your head fall back against the bed in pure exhaustion. You were dehydrated, covered in sweat and ready to give up. “So I lied before, you’re gonna give me one smaller push to help bubs out Y/n and that it’s—you're done.”

“I can’t.”

“No peach you can.” Bob cooed. “You can because you’ve come this far.”

“I’m not even sure if you're here or not.” You sobbed as you reached out to caress Bob's cheek. “I’m not even sure if you're here with me or if I’m seeing things.”

“I’m here, I’m real.” Bob whispered in your ear. “And we’re having our baby Peach, just one more little push and it’s gonna be you and me and our little one against the world.” You nodded softly and you shut your eyes and groaned. “You can do it.”

“Alright let’s have this baby! One more small push!” Lily announced as another contraction tour through your exhausted body.

“Ahhhhhh!!” You shouted and Bob swore you bust his eardrum, but it was a small sacrifice as the cries of the world’s newest human echoed off the walls.

“Congratulations Mr and Mrs Floyd you have a little baby girl.” Lily handed you your daughter the second she was born. Placing her on your chest within seconds of her arrival.

“Oh Peach, she's so beautiful.” Bob cried as tears streamed down his cheeks. He swore he’d never be able to love someone more than he loved you. But as you held your newborn daughter on your chest he kinda thought he’d been wrong. He could love someone just as much as he loved you. Your daughter.

“She's perfect, hi b-baby.” Your voice was all but a whisper as your head lulled to the side. You felt dizzy, lightheaded as your daughters cried softened. “I love you.”

“Y/n? Sweetheart are you alright?” You didn’t reply but you looked up at your husband with a dazed expression, a tunnel had begun to form, edges of a dark black hole crept its way into your mind.

Chronos hole—the one between this world and the next.

“Peach?” Alarms rang out as Lily removed your crying newborn just minutes earth side from your chest as your eyes rolled into the back of your head. “No no no no what’s wrong what’s happening to her?” Bob asked as he tapped your cheek softly. “Hey, Peach, no stay with me, stay with me.”

“Her blood pressure is dropping, she’s haemorrhaging.” Lily explained as she and a bunch of other nurses worked around you. “We need to get her into surgery, Mr Floyd.”

“Sir, step back—“ An older nurse asked as she placed a hand on Bob's shoulder. He did as he watched Lily take a sample of your blood.

“I’ll head directly to the lab to drop off the sample.”

“Just make sure her surgeon has o-negative on the ready.” The only nurse replied as Bob stood there, watching as they wheeled you out on the same bed you'd just given birth in. He didn't even get a chance to say goodbye, he didn't get a chance to tell you how much he loved you.

“Uh, do I go with her or?” Bob didn’t know what to do, his whole world had been turned upside down and on its head already today, and again it had just flipped once more. There was one nurse left, he didn’t know her name, but she smiled politely at him.

“No, you should stay here with your daughter, she needs her daddy now.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~

And through every grievance, every war, the land and the sky didn't give two shits about any of it. Bob Floyd knew that as he sat with his newborn daughter in the maternity room of the Miramar Base Hospital designed by man, for man to help other men with westernised medical procedures and treatments…

That it wouldn't give two shits about you either.

“Hey..” A gruff voice came from the doorway, it took Bob all his light and all his remaining energy to look up from his daughter. The light and life of you. “I uh, I just thought I’d come check in on you and Phoenix.” Mav crossed his arms over his chest as he moved into the room. “How’s your wife doing?”

“I don’t know.” Bob explained as he rocked his little girl, skin to skin was important so he’d stripped off what he could. “She’s still in surgery.” Pete could see the worry written in the lines of Bob's face. But the little girl who cried against his shoulder had him mesmerised. “Sorry darlin, I got you, daddy’s here.”

“She’s a little beauty isn’t she?” Mav sat down beside the WSO who’d had a longer day then most. “You get a chance to name her yet? Before—?” Mav didn’t have to say before you went into shock. Your body had been through a lot and the nurses believed if you hadn’t held on so long, held back against what your body was telling you it needed to do then there was a possibility that it could have been a rather smooth delivery. Bob took that personally, the only reason you were holding back was because he wasn't here for you when you needed him the most.

“No, but we’ll name her after, for now she’s baby Peach.”

“Your wife’s nickname.” Mav replied softly as he looked up. He knew then and there what was about to happen.

Bob knew there was a Doctor standing in the doorway. He didn’t dare look up. He knew if he looked up he’d be told the worst news of his life.

Bob remembered that had asked you once when you were wrapped up in his arms in the dead of the night, listening to the storm raging on outside if you knew anything at all about a Greek God called Chronos. He remembered that you had chuckled out a soft no as he trailed his lips up your neck. Bob told you that he carried a sickle, that he used it to cut a hole, a tear in the cosmos between heaven and earth. Chronos did that to separate this world from the next, to separate the known from the unknown.

And while a Doctor by the name of Henry Nardella told him that you didn’t make it through the surgery, that you'd left him and your daughter behind, in a world where nothing made sense without you in it.

Well—Robert Floyd felt as if he’d fallen straight into it.

“No, please don't leave me here.” Bob felt like he’d fallen into the cosmic existence between now and soon to come, plummeting into a realm where time didn’t exist and light didn’t reach. He felt like he had tumbled into a parallel dimension where nothing made sense, nothing seemed tangible or real. He’d descended into a world where you weren't around. “No Peach, no.”

But at the touch of his earlobe, a slight pressure formed at the lobe. So warm and comforting. Bob knew as your baby girl settled in against his chest at the lub dub of his heart beating for you–he knew you were safe on the other side.

Because you had tugged on his earlobe, just like you promised you would.

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~

#bob floyd #bob floyd imagine #bob top gun #bob floyd fic #bob x reader #bob floyd x reader #robert floyd x reader #robert 'bob' floyd #robert bob floyd x reader #bob floyd x y/n #bob floyd angst

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keen-li · 5 months

Text

Only one | 01

Warnings: toxic relationship trauma, trauma in general, mentally broken oc, manipulation, yendere jungkook. [Still more warnings to be added]

Psychiatrist jungkook x patient reader

.......

"I just wanna be good enough for someone you get" you play with the hem of your hospital gown.

"But no one is ever good to me" you take a deep breath feeling the tears coming but you hold them in.

"It's okay to cry, don't hide your emotions from me" your psychiatrist, Mr jeon, says having noticed you holding back. Once he says that your tears fall drop by drop until they're leaving your eyes like a waterfall. Mr jeon doesn't say anything, he just notes down what he observes.

"I know I'm good girl, don't you think I'm a good girl?" Good girl, a word You’ve been trying to stop referring to yourself as. Ever since your last relationship, which is one of the many reasons you're in this damn hospital, where your boyfriend would use it so often and even make you refer yourself as that, you haven't been able to let it go yet. Mr jeon hasn't addressed it yet but you're so sure he's noticed it by now.

He's silent to your question, "don't you think I'm a good girl" you ask so genuinely it's sad. Mr jeon simply smiles at you.

"I think you're a good person" he says no emotion behind it.

You scoff.

"I'm sorry, is there something else you would've liked me to say" he sits attentive and alert. His tone is gentle though the question feels sharp.

"I-i just..." You fail to speak and he gives you a reassuring look to help you speak.

"H-he always told me no-one will ever find me good enough apart from him" jungkook knows who the 'he' is, he's been a major topic of your sessions.

"Mmm" Mr jeon acknowledges as he takes note of something. Sometimes you spend your nights wondering what he's writing about you.

Could it be about how much he doesn't want to work with you anymore. Or maybe you're just insecure.

.....

"No please take me back" you flop around in the nurses hands.

"I'm okay, I promise." You don't sound okay and the nurses know better. It's one of those days where you have a mental breakdown. You don't see the damage you cause but others do and that's why they have to take you back to your room to cool down.

Mr jeon watches from afar as they take you away. You were having a session with him that's when you had your breakdown. You weren't even done with the session only in an hour out of the two hours you always have set. Mr jeon has seen your breakdowns before and even took notes of what you said while in that state.

Guess he has to see you next week.

......

You're sick of this place, its so plain and boring. You've been here for eight weeks and even though you feel you're getting better, the hospital thinks otherwise. Mr jeon hasn't given you anything on your progress, only praising you for your strength and openness. You want to know when you can leave this place. You wanna go back to your home, where your can rest peacefully with your dog and pet fish. Oh, you remembered your mother took your pets since you can't be there to take care of them. You just wanna be around them. And they've been on your mind lately.

"So how have you been?" He starts as he settles in his seat with just notepad, glasses glued to his face.

"I'm sorry I wasn't with you for the last two weeks" it's true, he's the only psychiatrist you trust and he hasn't been with you for two weeks. That caused you to have to speak to another psychiatrist, she honestly didn't understand you like Mr jeon does and that made it harder for you to express your true feelings.

"I had an emergency I had to attend to" Mr jeon doesn't talk about his personal life with you only focusing on yours. He doesn't need to tell you anything about his personal life and you don't need to know.

"I've been thinking about home more often lately." You say avoiding Mr jeon's eyes. He noticed you always did this when you expressed something to him that you weren't sure he'd be interested in. But he's always interested in what you say to him.

"Mm, what is it that you're missing at home?" he says in his ever present professional tone.

When he asks this question you remember the cute dog that's probably missing you right now, and the little fish you kept fed and clean in the tank, you hope whoever is looking after them is doing a good job cause if they aren't they're gonna feel it. Those animals have been the only source of comfort and joy in your life, until you were separated.

And now that he's asked that question and you realise the answer, the tears begin to form.

Mr jeon notices and smiles "its okay" his voice is so comforting that it aids your crying. Next second tears are flowing down your face as you try to control your sobs and breathing.

"I-i-i m-miss.." he can see you struggle with your words and reminds you of the breathing tactic he taught you.

You cool down a bit from the tactic, enough to say your words atleast.

"I miss my pets. My dog, my fish" you say and he can see how much they mean to you.

"Why do you miss them?" Seems like a bad question to ask someone in tears but because it's Mr jeon you don't mind.

"They were my only comfort, my only joy and my only hope" you sob as memories of them, especially your dog, make it to your brain.

He watches intently as you sob, he takes down some notes but you're too emotional to notice.

"I just wanna go home " you confess. "I'm tired of it here, I miss home" you sob intensely forgetting about the tactic.

"I'd honestly do anything to leave this place" Mr jeon stops at that.

"I just wanna leave this place" you confess all of this unconsciously. You feel so free around Mr jeon that you don't even think before you say anything.

"I just wanna go home" you whisper finally calming down.

You can see as you wipe your tears, Mr jeon places the note book down and even takes his glasses off. He only takes them off when he's leaving after his shift. He stands going to the door checking outside and locking it when he finally gets back.

You're confused about this new found behaviour, during your sessions he only focuses on you and never does anything else, especially not take off his glasses.

You're confused even more when he squats in front of you as if speaking to a child. He places his palms on the couch on each side of you as you stare at him with raised brows. It's weird seeing Mr jeon like this, he looks different from the the psychiatrist you speak to most of the time.

"Would you do anything to go back home?" he looks at you with so much patience and determination, like you would a child you're trying to convince to go to school.

"You'd do anything huh?" Even the way he's speaking is different, it's more casual.

You remember your previous confession, and even though it was an unconscious confession you still meant it. You can see him waiting for your answer and you unsurely nod.

He shakes his head declining your response.

"I need you to use your words. I need you to be sure" his tone is so soft and gentle and it makes you even more comfortable around him.

After thinking about it, which he lets you do, you have your answer.

"Yes I would." You nod along your words. He smiles at that, feeling to be going in the right direction with you.

"You know I can get you out of this place in a second, right?" He questions you.

You nod. "Words y/n"

"Yes, I know you can"

He nods. "Do you trust me? " It's actually something you've thought about. Do you trust Mr jeon? yes, yes you do. He's the only one you trust in this whole hospital or even the world.

"I do trust you, Mr jeon" he smiles at the honorific. You're unsure to what's he's getting to but you listen close.

"So if you trust me, then let me get you out of this place" why is he asking you this. Does he do this for others as well.

"I can take you somewhere better. I can take you home" and when he says home your eyes light up.

"Home?" You ask and he nods. "I do wanna go home"

"Okay then" he smiles at you. His eyes then turn dark But you can barely notice mind clogged with the hope of being able to go home.

"But you have to do one thing for me"

#fanfic #jungkook #jeon jungguk #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #bts #jungkook au #yendere jungkook #jungkook angst #jungkook and reader #jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook #jungkook x you #jungkook x oc

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fishyapple · 26 days

Text

clegan but make it mafia and crime and billionaire playboys !

--------

In which Bucky is the heir of a well-to-do billion dollar company with ties to some pretty shady businesses, and Gale is the bastard son of his father’s rival, who just so happens to be in the mafia.

a lil excerpt of a work in progress:

A hand covered his mouth, and then suddenly an arm shot around his waist pinning his arms to his side. Gale felt himself pulled back into a narrow corner of the warehouse. He let out a muffled grunt but the pressure on his mouth only increased to the point it was almost painful.

He squirmed weakly against whoever was behind him but his body was still aching from the punches the grunts had inflicted earlier in the day.

“Stay quiet. I’ll get us both out of here.” The voice wasn’t too deep. Not nearly as much as his own, but it had a nice tone. Smooth, and it tickled the nape of Gale’s neck as it was whispered to him. “I don’t suppose you’re very friendly with the owners of this fine establishment.”

Gale let out a huff that hopefully meant: no he was very much not friendly with the men who had hijacked his bike and then knocked him out.

“Okay. Promise me you won’t scream if I let go. Give me a nod.”

Gale debated trying to elbow the man behind him and making a run for it. But anything would probably be better than being caught at this moment, and in his condition he wouldn’t be making it very far anyway. He nodded slowly.

Slowly the hand moved off his mouth, and the arm around his waist repositioned itself so his arms were free to move on their own accord. Gale made a move to stand himself, but his left knee gave out as soon as he went to put some pressure on it.

A sharp jolt of pain ran up from his kneecap to his thigh, and Gale realized the knife wound from earlier had probably opened. Gale closed his eyes and tried to muffle his own scream with his hand. He exhaled a shaky breath, trying to will the throbbing to go away, and suddenly became aware of the arm around him tightening again, holding up a majority of his weight that he couldn’t keep himself.

#buck x bucky #clegan #masters of the air #mota #gale cleven #buck cleven #john egan #bucky egan #buck squared #gale buck cleven #john bucky egan #clegan au #fanfic #mafia au

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venus-haze · 1 year

Text

Rip 'Em to Shreds (Mickey Altieri x Reader)

Summary: Mickey’s your boyfriend, and he’s not cheating on you. At least, you don't think so, until your roommate plants the seeds of doubt in your head. While sneakily trying to find out the truth for yourself, being in the wrong place at the wrong time lands you as suspect number one in the Ghostface killings at Windsor College.

Note: Gender neutral (mildly fem-coded) reader, but no other descriptions are used. I think Mickey was a fun Ghostface, and I’m a sucker for Timothy Olyphant, so this is the result. I rewatched Scream 2 recently but obviously took creative liberties with some things. Do not interact if you’re under 18 or post thinspo/ED content.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: Descriptions of violence, paranoia, and emotional manipulation. Do not interact if you're under 18.

You stared at the blinking cursor on the library computer screen, silently cursing yourself for letting procrastination get the better of you. As much as you loved going to Windsor College, you were beginning to suspect that declaring a Literature major would be your downfall, especially the paper you were supposed to be working on. You already knew what you were going to write about, having notes and a weird-looking outline ready to go. It had just been a matter of sitting down and actually writing the paper that was due the following week.

It didn’t help that Mickey and his friends were exceptionally good at dragging you into more ways to procrastinate a paper that could easily segue into a grad school application. Perhaps the importance of the paper impacted your attitude toward it, not wanting to face the behemoth that would determine your academic future.

Just as you were halfway through a sentence on the second page of your paper, everything went dark.

“Mickey, c’mon,” you whined.

“Give me some credit, you’ve been hard to track down,” he said, moving his hands from over your eyes.

He pulled up a seat next to you, leaning on the stack of books piled next to the computer.

“What’re you writing about?”

“Sexuality in 19th century gothic literature—dark corridors, bodice ripping, ghosts, rape, incest, vampires, mad women, all that fun stuff.”

He grinned, tugging on the hem of your shirt. “You had me at bodice ripping.”

“Later, lover boy,” you smiled. “I have to finish this draft before the library closes.”

He tapped on the computer screen. “Dining hall closes in about an hour. Don’t skip dinner for this paper.”

“I hate not having a kitchen,” you lamented. “It makes no sense the dining hall closes at eight when night classes go until nine and the library’s open until ten.”

He gave your shoulder a comforting squeeze. “Next year we’ll get an apartment, then you can cook at two in the morning all you want.”

You couldn’t help the adoring smile that spread across your lips. “You wanna move in together?”

“Yeah, don’t you?”

“Of course I do.”

“Good,” he said, his smile matching yours. “Come over whenever you finish that. The roomie went home for the weekend so–”

“So I should plan to be there all weekend?”

“It’s like you can read my mind.”

You laughed. “Shut up before I change mine, jerk.”

“Look, I’ll be late getting in, I have to work on that short film for class, but I’ll leave the door unlocked for you.”

“Okay, see you later. Love you.”

“Love you too,” he said, giving you a kiss before getting up from the chair. “Don’t skip dinner.”

It wasn’t until you were six pages into your paper and your stomach rumbled that you remembered to glance at the clock in the corner of the computer. A quarter to nine. Damn. You took a chance on one of the vending machines in the library, getting a chocolate bar and a bag of chips to tide you over until you could eat a real meal.

You made incredible progress on your paper, though. The promise of spending the weekend with your boyfriend was a good motivator to at least bullshit your way through the first draft. It was only a draft, after all, it didn’t need to be perfect. At least, that’s what you told yourself.

By the time you reached the end of page seven and had typed up your bibliography, you felt like your vision was blurring as you tried to proofread what you’d written. Rubbing your eyes, you hoped to shake off some of the screen exhaustion to at least catch any glaring typos. Finally, at about half past nine, you’d printed your paper and had packed up, heading back to your dorm to get what you needed for the weekend.

Usually when you walked around campus at night, there weren’t many people out and about. Windsor College was a sleepy liberal arts school for the most part, which you appreciated. The groups of people ambling around finally clicked when you noticed Greek letters on various t-shirts. You hadn’t been all that interested in getting involved in Greek life, turning down an offer from some of Mickey’s friends to join them at the Delta Lambda Zeta party that night.

You weren’t surprised, however, to return to your dorm and find your roommate Kim lounging on a beanbag chair, her eyes glued to the small TV on top of her dresser.

“Hey,” she said, barely glancing at you as you walked in.

“Did you go to class today?” you asked as you set your backpack down, unzipping it so you could shove your pajamas and a change of clothes inside.

Kim finally answered when you walked past the TV to get to something in your dresser. “What? Yeah, I went to one this afternoon. I slept through the morning one.”

“Seriously? I woke you up for that before I left.”

“I fell back asleep,” she shrugged. “You going to Mickey’s?”

“Yeah. I’ll be back Sunday night, or Monday morning,” you said.

“Are you seriously bringing your books with you while you’re sucking and fucking at your boyfriend’s for the weekend?”

“First of all, gross. Second, he’s filming tonight. Might as well be productive while I wait.”

“Isn’t this like the fifth time in the past two weeks he’s been ‘filming’? Interesting how that’s happening while all the sororities are having their bullshit pledge mixers.”

“I know the air quotes around filming. I don’t wanna hear it.”

“I’m just saying!”

“Kim, he just asked me to move in together next year. I don’t think he’s cheating.”

“Maybe he’s just deflecting to keep you off the scent.”

“Of what? He’s been working on a short film that has a lot of night scenes. He even asked me to be in it, and I said no. You watch way too much daytime TV instead of actually going to class.”

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t come crying to me when you catch him six inches deep in an Omega Beta Zeta or whatever.”

You shook your head while shoving the last of your toiletries into your backpack. “Whatever. Bye.”

One more reason to live with Mickey the following school year, no more dealing with ridiculous roommates. Kim wasn’t that bad in comparison to the horror stories you’d heard about other people’s roommates, but she always had a knack for making an ass of herself.

As you walked across campus to Mickey’s dorm, you tried to shake Kim’s implications from your mind. Mickey wasn’t cheating on you. You trusted him, and the two of you had so many mutual friends all over campus that if he were, someone would have told you by now. Despite your attempts to reassure yourself, you found your mind racing, and you became the type of partner you swore you’d never become.

If you happened to divert your walk to his dorm to go past where he was supposedly filming, he couldn’t blame you for the coincidence. The clear, beautiful night was perfect for frat parties and leisurely walks in the moonlight. You passed by a few of your friends from your major, stopping to talk with them for a little bit before continuing on your way.

It seemed like in the fifteen minutes or so you’d spent walking around, you saw less and less people. Mickey said he’d been filming near the sorority houses, but you didn’t see him around. Your heart sank to your stomach. Could Kim have been right? No. You wouldn’t jump to that conclusion so quickly. Instead, you kept walking, hoping to find him a little farther up.

In the distance, you could see a girl standing on the front porch of one of the sorority houses, phone in her hand as she looked around frantically. Weird. She retreated inside, and against your better judgment, you decided to get a closer look of what was going on.

You noticed a gleam of silver out of the corner of your eye and stopped in your tracks upon seeing a black-robed figure with a stark white ghost mask that stood out in the darkness, stalking up the brick pathway across the grassy quad. Whoever was beneath the costume didn’t notice you, and you wanted to keep it that way, hiding behind a nearby tree as you watched him approach the Omega Beta Zeta house.

Clamping your clammy hand over your mouth, you tried to make as little noise as possible so as to not catch Ghostface’s attention. A cold chill raced across your skin. Someone was about to die. There wasn’t enough time to run to a phone and call the police or campus security. It’d take at least ten minutes for either to arrive, and then, it’d be too late. For a moment, you considered running after him, but quickly realized that without a weapon, it wouldn’t do any good.

You watched helplessly as the masked killer slipped into the open door of the sorority house. Just a few moments later, the door shut as a girl left for you assumed one of the parties that night, but it wasn't the same girl you'd just seen outside. Unsure of what to do, you waited, but it didn't take long for a faint yell to tear through the silence of the night.

Fear froze your limbs, keeping you in place as you heard the terrified screams coming from inside the house. Your heart racing, you swore you were going to pass out until you saw the balcony doors swing open, a girl tumbling onto it, followed closely behind by Ghostface. As soon as the knife pierced her, your body finally went into panic mode, and you started running.

More screaming and a loud crash came from behind you. Looking back, you saw the splintered balcony and a body splayed on the ground below. Ghostface slipped out from the front door, and seemed to be heading in the same direction you were sprinting off too. Oh shit, had he seen you? Was he following you?

Tears clouded your vision as you ran, and your shoe caught on a loose brick in the walkway, sending you to the ground. The contents of your backpack crashed and rattled against each other on the impact, and you groaned at your skinned wrists. Still, you pushed yourself off the ground with determination, not bothering to look behind you and see if Ghostface had noticed your fall or was now tailing you.

Slamming the door to Mickey’s room shut, you threw your backpack aside and immediately climbed into his bed, pulling the covers over your head, as if that would shield you from Ghostface. What the fuck was taking Mickey so long? Your breath caught in your throat. He probably had no idea Ghostface was running wild across campus. Burying your face in his pillow, you screamed into it, releasing the pent up anxiety and frustration over not being able to do anything about the situation.

You weren’t sure when you’d fallen asleep, but the sun had already risen when you were woken up by the phone. Shoving the covers off of you, you hastily picked up, almost expecting to hear Ghostface’s unsettling voice on the other end of the line.

“Hello?”

Relief swept over you when you heard Mickey’s voice instead of the one you were dreading. “Hey baby, it’s me—“

“Where are you? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m at the police station. Everything’s—well, everything’s not fine. I am, though. I’ll explain later. Have you been in my room all night?”

You hesitated before answering with a weak, “Yeah.”

The other end of the line was silent for a moment. “Alright, I’m leaving now. I should be there in like, 15 minutes.”

“Okay, see you soon. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

The other end of the line went dead. You looked at your discarded backpack on the floor, and decided to at least freshen up and change out of yesterday’s clothes before Mickey returned. Each article of clothing that fell to the floor felt like evidence piling up. You hadn’t technically done anything wrong, but the previous night's events, your complacency, made your limbs feel abnormally heavy as you changed into fresh clothes. Before you knew it, you were face to face with your boyfriend, who looked almost shocked when he saw you.

“What happened to you? Your wrists–” He gently tilted your head up, inspecting your chin. “You’re all scraped up.”

“I tripped and fell,” you said.

“You’re sure that’s all that happened?”

“Yeah, why?”

“You know Cici Cooper, from my film studies class?”

You nodded. You knew Cici. You also knew she was an Omega Beta Zeta.

“Some Ghostface wannabe stabbed her and pushed her off the balcony of the Omega Beta Zeta house, and then showed up at the Delta Lambda Zeta party.”

“Cici’s dead?”

You sat on the edge of his bed, your head in your hands as you let out a pained whine.

“Baby, what’s going on?” he asked, putting his arm around you as he sat by your side.

“I saw him.”

“Saw who?”

“I saw Ghostface. I saw him run into the Omega Beta Zeta house, but when I heard screaming I–I got so scared I just came back here. That’s when I fell.”

“Y/N, why didn’t you call the police?”

“I was terrified, Mickey! I wasn’t thinking straight and I—if I call now they’re gonna think I had something to do with it. Isn’t that what Randy says? Everyone’s a suspect! Oh my god, they’ll think it was me.”

“No one will think that.”

His paltry reassurance was no match for your word vomit, because before you could help it, you blurted out, “Are you cheating on me?”

“What? No! Why would you even think that?”

“Why did the police question you if you were shooting your movie?”

He sighed. “Derek was running late to the Delta party. He asked me to stop in and check on Sidney. I was at the party for maybe ten minutes before the police found Cici’s body. After Ghostface showed up, they questioned everyone who even looked at the place that night.”

“You’re right. I’m sorry. Kim—“

“Is about to be on academic probation because she watches soap operas instead of going to class.”

“Yeah. Maybe I should go ahead and call the police, let them know what I saw.”

“No, like you said before, with the timing and everyone being on edge, I don’t think it’d be a great look right now.”

“So what do I do?”

“Let’s just keep this between us, okay? No more secrets unless it’s with each other.”

“Okay,” you agreed.

He took your hand, turning it over to look at the damage to it. “Jesus, are you sure you’re alright?”

“I should probably go to the student health center, huh?”

“I’ll walk you.”

“You probably haven’t slept. I’ll be fine.”

“Just let me do this. I don’t want you to be alone right now.”

You smiled, giving him a kiss that he quickly escalated, laying you back on his bed. Making out with Mickey was nice, it was normal. For a few minutes, you let yourself forget about Ghostface as you parted your lips for him, letting him slip his tongue inside your mouth. When his hands gripped your wrists to pin you to the bed, however, you hissed in pain, and he quickly released them.

“Sorry, sorry. I forgot,” he whispered, pressing apologetic kisses to your lips. “We should get going.”

Reluctantly, you agreed, remembering that his roommate wouldn’t be back any time soon, and you had the rest of the weekend to yourselves after you went to the health center, and got something to eat, too, since you were thinking about it.

Mickey kept his arm securely around you as the two of you made your way across campus. You spotted Sidney, Randy, and Hallie speaking among themselves at one of the tables outside, and Mickey made a bit of a detour to go talk to them. You couldn’t exactly read their expressions when they saw you until Randy spoke up.

“You sure missed a lot last night. Convenient,” he said, not bothering to hide his accusatory tone.

“Cut it out. I already told you guys they were working on a paper,” Mickey said, holding you closer to his side. “You can check the computer logs in the library.”

“Wh-What happened to your arms?” Sidney asked, her eyes fixed on your scraped wrists. For a split second, you thought it was out of concern, but then quickly realized the suspicion in her voice.

“Look, I’m really sorry about what happened, but I don’t know anything,” you said. “After I finished my paper, I went back to my dorm and then I tripped and fell on the way to Mickey’s. There were plenty of people who saw me last night.”

Hallie gave you a tense smile. “It’s okay, Y/N.”

“Yeah, I’m taking them to the student health center so nothing gets infected. We’ll see you guys later,” Mickey said.

The varying looks of distrust on the group's faces made you want to cry. As you and Mickey resumed your walk to the dining hall, your brain worked overtime to come up with worst case scenarios, as if somehow the Ghostface killings could be pinned onto you, even the ones in town despite you being with your friends during that whole incident.

“They all think it’s me.”

Mickey’s silence was more than enough of an answer to make you panic.

Stopping in your tracks, you grabbed his arm. “You don’t think it’s me, do you?”

“I know it’s not you,” he said, his voice soft and reassuring. “They’re just on edge after what happened last night, especially after Derek went back into the Delta Lambda Zeta house after Sidney saw Ghostface—“

“Oh my god, is he okay?”

Mickey shrugged. “He got cut, but not fatally. Not the best look on his part.”

“What? No way, Derek would never—Seriously?”

“C’mon, Y/N, why would he go back in there?”

“So what, since he happened to get cut and I happened to trip, now they’re all thinking Derek and I have been secretly scheming to chop everyone up? Where is he? Maybe I can talk to him and—“

“Why don’t we just get to the health center before you run across campus to find the other top suspect in this whole thing.”

“Don’t say that. Please don’t say that.”

He nodded. “I’ll drop it. I’m sorry, baby.”

The rest of the walk to the student health center was silent, though Mickey kept his arm wrapped around you.

“If you don’t have anyone else, you know you have me,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“I know,” you said, though you didn’t exactly believe yourself.

#mickey altieri x reader #ghostface x reader #slasher x reader #ghostface #scream 2 #slasher community #slasher fandom #scream franchise #scream fanfic

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thedarkdisgrace · 1 month

Text

This is my thread from twitter on Dazai’s promise to Oda, how I believe Dazai tries to keep that promise & Dazai’s interactions with the PM + why Oda last words were what they were. I kinda had written this in response to some particular claims over there. Mostly around Dazai returning to the mafia.

Not gonna lie, this might be long for some, I actually cut out alot lol I kinda got carried away. These are just my interpretations, take them as you will. I also didn’t edit this from twitter so, sorry if there are spelling mistakes lol

I want to start out by saying that if you are viewing BSD in a “everything is either black or white” lens, I feel you are missing the entire point of BSD & a major theme. This story is entirely morally gray & every character is a different shade of gray.

There is no pure good or pure evil within BSD, even if some characters might get close to the extreme of one side or the other. Now, going into the rest of this with that mindset let’s start with EXACTLY what Oda said to Dazai.

“Be on the side that saves people. If both sides are the same, then choose to become a good person. Save the weak, protect the orphaned. You might not see a great difference between right & wrong but… saving others is just a bit more wonderful.” The Dark Era.

Oda is essentially saying that “sides” don’t matter, what matters is him choosing to be a good person. THAT is what Dazai promises to Oda. His promise is to become a good person. That is the goal he works towards everyday. Oda didn’t make him promise to leave the mafia.

It makes no difference what /side/ Dazai is on or who he interacts with. No matter where Dazai is or who he is with it doesn't change HOW he chooses to approach the world. As long as Dazai continues to do whatever good he can, to work towards being a better person, he is keeping

his promise to Oda. His interactions with the mafia or the people within it don’t affect the fact he is still choosing to try to be better everyday (which again, is keeping his promise). Whatever the mafia does is separate from Dazai even if he is interacting with the members.

Hell, even if Dazai ends up in the PM again with the upcoming trade, it doesn’t negate all the progress he made NOR does it break his promise. Dazai isn’t /completely/ different BUT he /is/ different than he was back then. His perceptions have changed, whether he admits it or not

That won’t change if he goes back. He will continue to be different if he had to rejoin the mafia. He’s fully capable of keeping his promise even then. There are all different levels & types of “doing good”. Dazai is still capable of doing good in the mafia, just not in the same-

exact ways he can in the ADA but all the organization's play important roles in protecting the city. People seem to forget that even the mafia members are mostly morally gray, they still have the capacity to do good, even if they also do bad. Chuuya is a good example as he has-

saved the entire city a minimum of twice, he loves his city & would give his life to protect it. On a smaller scale, Kouyou agreed to assist Dazai in getting Kyoka free from the PM & the government. Plus don’t forget Oda himself was a mafia member & ex assassin yet many describe-

him as a good person. Besides, the ADA has needed the PMs help countless times at this point, the ADA would’ve been screwed without them. Point is, Dazai can continue to chose to be a better person no matter what organization he’s with or whom he chooses to interact with.

His individual journey is up to him, but if he continues doing better that’s all that matters. But since I know people will disagree about what that promise means, let’s get to the root of WHY Dazai’s promise to Oda was to choose to become a good person.

So, why were Oda’s last words what they were? As we all know Oda was similar to Dazai in some ways when he was younger. As a child assassin, he was pretty much disconnected from the world around him emotionally & just going through the motions until Natsume came along.

Natsume gave Oda the book he had been looking for, the last installment of his favorite series. Reading that book is the key moment that altered Oda’s path. In Oda’s own words, “the world I’d known before completely changed. Before that all I had was killing.” The Dark Era.

But the copy Natsume provided was missing specific pages around why the assassin character in the book stopped killing, Natsume obviously did this on purpose. Before providing Oda with the last book, Natsume had told him “Then you write what happens next”.

Oda decides to take those words to heart later on & write about why the assassin stopped killing himself. This is where one of the most important lines is.

Oda says “I decided to write it myself. I would become a novelist & write a story about why the man stopped killing. But to become a novelist, I needed to sincerely know what it meant to live. So I stopped killing.” The Dark Era.

Oda admits here that he hadn’t really lived, hadn’t known what it /meant/ to live. To experience life in the way most people do. This is where he & Dazai connect. Neither of them had really lived & they couldn’t see a reason to do so.

Oda even says in the Untold Origins light novel, “I don’t need forgiveness. There is no forgiveness in this world. There is only retaliation- revenge against those who betray you.”

That was Oda’s mentality before but then Oda makes his choice to stop killing.

It’s only then that he starts to actually truly interact with the world around him & the people in it. /Especially/ the people. He starts to help people & through doing so he begins to understand living. Oda says he continued to think about one particular line from the novel-

“People live to save themselves. It’s something they realize right before they die.”

Oda believes Natsume knew he was an assassin. That he gave him the book with the torn out pages & that singular line left untouched to tell Oda to save himself. I believe Oda is right.

Natsume wanted Oda to save himself. As for exactly why Natsume did so, I couldn’t say as of right now.

But why is all that important?

Well, because that’s what Oda ends up telling Dazai with his last words.

Yes, Oda tells Dazai to become a good person, those are the words he uses & that is Dazai’s promise to him. But the message beneath the words themselves? /Save yourself./ Oda is telling Dazai the same thing Natsume told him. /Save yourself./

Oda wanted Dazai to save himself. He tells Dazai to become a good person, to save people, because that’s how he, himself, found an understanding of living. It’s how he experienced living for the first time & how he was trying to save himself a well.

He encourages Dazai to follow the path he did because they are similar & saving others was the only thing Oda could see that worked. & Dazai listens /because/ he knows Oda actually walked that path himself.

Oda would not care who Dazai associates with or where he goes as long as Dazai continues to try to save himself. To keep trying to be a better person for his own sake as well as others. Again, I repeat the line Oda kept coming back to. “People live to save themselves”.

So, if Dazai was hanging out with Chuuya (or anyone else in the PM or in the dark) or even started dating Chuuya, as long as Dazai continues working to save himself & saving others, Oda would be happy for him.

Dazai is also pretty clear with how he feels about Chuuya, given he never calls him ‘ex partner’ he only ever calls him his partner. I think what he says at the end of the lovecraft fight is an accurate description, “we’re enemies of the bad guys.”

Regardless of sides, their relationship hasn’t changed, they’ve proven that 3 times over already, & I doubt it will. Sides don’t matter because they’ve always only been themselves with each other. Dazai has still kept up trying to be better since reuniting with Chuuya,

That’s not going to change if he spends more time with Chuuya. Dazai is his own person & is more than capable of continuing to keep his promise no matter where he ends up or who he’s with.

Not to mention every single time Dazai & Chuuya have worked together again, it was for a good purpose. To save Kyu & prevent another Guild attack, Chuuya fought a dragon to save the city (without even talking about the plan beforehand) & with no guarantee Dazai would be alive

(aside their soulmate thing where they always know) & now they worked together to defeat Fyodor to save the world (hopefully saved it). So, obviously being close to Chuuya again hasn’t changed Dazai’s goals & he is still keeping his promise.

But tbh, at this point, I don’t think his promise is the /only/ thing keeping Dazai in the light & trying to become a better person anymore. Dazai in DA says “You were right, Odasaku. It’s certainly wonderful to be on the side that saves others. If you plan on living, that is.”

While Oda was right when he told Dazai being on the side of light wouldn’t be able to fix his loneliness, it’s clear by now Dazai sees the value in being there & he understands why Oda told him what he did. I think through the ADA, he has found more & more reasons to keep going.

In conclusion, Oda simply wanted Dazai to save himself by choosing to become a better person. Dazai is his own person & is more than capable of keeping his promise to Oda no matter where he is & who he’s interacting with.

BSD is a morally gray story & all the characters are various levels of gray, pretending the mafia is /all/ bad is just objectively incorrect given all they’ve done for the city.

Chuuya & Dazai’s relationship is one built on unyielding trust & his presence in Dazai’s life isn’t gonna affect Dazai choosing to be better everyday. It already hasn’t changed anything since they’ve ben working together again. I doubt his presence would ever change it.

Reminder to everyone, these are my interpretations & opinions. Take what you want from it, if you made it this far thank you for reading. i hope you guys liked it.

#bsd spoilers #bsd analysis #bsd manga #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #chuuya nakahara #oda sakunosuke #bsd #soukoku

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pendarling · 2 months

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The Town Theatre

Hero had to keep themselves level-headed as they watched the portrayal of their hero persona up on stage. They didn't think the town would actually take it this far, considering they were the only hero to save the citizens from Villain. Clearly, it didn't deter the townsfolk from writing a reconstruction of the events they saw into a play.

So when Hero sat down excited to view the story from the citizen's perspective, their jaw could not drop any lower.

"Oh, Villain, I know our love can't be understood," the actor that played them leaned up against the supposed version of Villain, their faces only mere centimetres apart. "But I'll do anything to be with you."

"I don't care, my love. They won't stop us."

Hero internally cringed, but looking around them, the audience silently watched with awe. Was this honestly how they saw Villain and them whenever they fought? Or were they so blinded by fantasy that it blurred the lines for them?

Hero would never act like this in a million years. Sure, there was occasional banter, but never to a romantic degree.

The crowd clapped as soon as the actors on stage kissed. They wanted to leave so badly, but curiosity kept them seated. They paid good money for their seat, and they would not waste it just not to see this through. Their hand went up to their mouth as the show kept going. They might have to barf sooner rather than later.

Hero had to wonder, however, if they could even make their appearances the same again; knowing what they know now, their interactions with Villain would have to change by force. It was the only way to stop people from making further assumptions about their relations. Besides, this was supposed to be a strictly work-related exchange, nothing beyond it.

As the play progressed, it kept getting worse. Eventually, Hero opted for a break; maybe a walk outside would do the trick. They stood from the chair and walked up the aisle to the double doors. By the time they had gotten out, the sun had just started to set.

They sat on the sidewalk's edge and stared into the sky, reeling from the dramatic play.

What were they even supposed to make of it?

"Crazy people…" They slowly shook their head in disbelief and numbly began walking back home. They would likely never recover from this again and probably refrain from fighting Villain in public spaces any longer. The risks were too high, and they didn't need the distraction.

It hadn't even been three minutes until the loud ringing of their phone went off, and as they checked their phone, it alerted them to a nearby police station in trouble. Hero worked with the police force, so for them to warn Hero directly meant trouble was up, and by the look of the locations, it was directly behind the theatre they left.

"Are you serious?" They mumbled and tapped on the screen. Villain was up to no good again and, as usual, had made their grand entrance by blowing up an entire row of police vehicles. Hero wasn't sure why Villain did the things that they did. Maybe it was for a form of satisfaction; the majority of the issues they've been causing were pointless and never led up to anything more remarkable than it.

Hero reflected on the chances of being caught out in the public's view again, especially after promising themselves a change of pace. They couldn't mull on it any longer, though; it was better to deal with it now and confront Villain about their actions. Hero spun on their heels and turned back around; whether they would be embarrassed or not was out of the question.

~~~ MASTERLIST

#fluff prompt #enemies to lovers #hero x villain #villain x hero #villainxhero #heroxvillain #hero x villain community #unreciprocated love #unrequited love prompts #unrequited pining #pining prompts #pining

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partyanimal167 · 6 months

Text

Talk Me Through It- Miguel x F!Reader

Someone (me) has discovered nsfw audios and has not recovered. I've also been into the nerd!Miguel fics that have been going around, but I won't bully him much in mine lol. I'm trying to get some nsfw practice in before I continue my multi-fic, so

cw: nsfw, mdni, fem reader, college au, author knows some Spanish, acquaintances to lovers, voice kink, praise kink, dirty talk, munch Miguel

Who was this? ...WHO! Ain't no way...he sound like that? Shit...

You barely stopped yourself from dropping your head on the desk as another student finished presenting their speech. You had mixed feelings about your Public Speaking class considering your major, but there were worse subjects to take. You already presented yours and were only staying to review other students' for extra credit.

You tapped your pencil absentmindedly as the next student stood to speak. You sat up a little better in your seat seeing who it was.

Miguel O'Hara grabbed people's attention whether he meant to or not. He took up space with his height, broad shoulders, and overall built physique. People were very shocked to learn that he was not an athlete his freshman year, and it probably haunted the football coach every season. You only knew him from hearsay and the occasional interaction when he was at the library during your work-study. You noticed him. It was impossible not to, so you were a bit intrigued to say the least.

The man stood at the front of the class and stumbled to get his laptop connected to the projector. Before beginning, he took out a pair of thin-framed glasses and cleared his throat.

"The work-life balance is something that many experts agree contributes to one's personal health. Yet there are many careers that demand inconsistent hours and strenuous work in order for progress to be made. How-," the man paused when he glanced from the screen to the array of faces looking back at him. He blanked for a moment, and you weren't sure if it was nerves or stress. After a moment, an awkward fake cough seemed to break his daze. He went on.

The presentation was actually pretty informative in your opinion, and Miguel did get his points across. You were surprised by the nervous emotions and little habits he displayed. He seemed to try to find a face to latch onto for eye-contact, and more than once did it feel like he was looking at you. You weren't quite sure, but it didn't matter really. He looked a tinge embarrassed when he finished and grabbed his things, but you hope it didn't bother him too much. People freeze, stutter, mispronounce things all the time.

After class you went to grab some lunch with your friends before the afternoon classes began. Your school was very diverse, and it excited you when you could hear different languages spoken at different tables. It was the main reason why you were taking a Spanish class as an elective. The world was connected in many ways, and many people around the world could speak two or even three languages. You glanced through your Spanish notes for a moment as you remembered that there was a project being assigned today. You were nervous, but your friends told you you were worrying for no reason.

...

"It's seem we'll be working together." That smooth voice grabbed your attention as people were packing up to go. You turned and looked up to see Miguel leaning on a desk near you. "I promise this project is going to go a lot better than that speech I gave earlier."

Oh so he did notice you. You smiled and shook your head. "Oh don't worry about that. Your speech was fine." you insisted. "Besides, why are you taking this class any way?" you were sure you had seen him giving parent tours for prospective international students.

Miguel chuckled as he shrugged his shoulders. "Easy A." You figured, but you also couldn't blame him. "How do you feel about presenting in Spanish though?"

You tilted your hand a little. "Eh I'm kinda okay with it. I'm much better reading it than speaking, but I can hold a conversation."

Miguel seemed to light up hearing that. "Verdad? De donde eres?" (Really? Where are you from?)

You didn't expect him to switch so soon, but you continued with the conversation. "Aqui, pero estudie espanol para cuatro anos y muchos gentes a la mi trabajo hablar." You knew what you said wasn't perfect, but Miguel nodded his head along as you spoke. (Here, but I studied Spanish for four years, and many people at my job speak)

"Bueno, pero tu sonas muy nerviosa. Por que?" You thought you were in your head, but somehow it felt as if he was expressing himself more in this language. You couldn't help but blush from the change. (Good, but you sound nervous. Why?)

You chuckled. "I am nervous. I like to say things correctly, and it's hard when I know I'm wrong."

Miguel shook his head. "Me gusta como tu sonas." he grinned. "Well, I'll text you my schedule, and we can find a time for us to meet up."

"Sweet! I look forward to working with you." you beamed.

The man softened a little. "Same."

~~~

You slumped in bed scrolling through your phone trying to find something to occupy the night. There were a couple of shows you could watch, comics to read, or just endless scrolling. You were looking through some fandom content when one of your mutuals sent you a message.

N3rdT@amer: Girl! I just found this. You got to check it out!

There was a link attached, and it brought you to someone's post where an video teased an audio release. You weren't sure why they sent you this but decided to give it a go. You popped in your headphones as recommended and took a deep breath.

You could hear what sounded to be background noise of people chatting and jazz music. The sounds of steam and glass clinking set up the scene in a coffee shop. Foot-steps got louder then a voice spoke loud and clear.

"Hi, can I get a cold brew with a little hazelnut. Large please." a pause..."on the house? What did I do to deserve such kindness?" There was a tonal change that followed--a little flustered and shy. "Oh, you see me scrabbling with my schoolwork over there? Hehe, that's very kind of you. I want to give you something in return." A pause.

The smooth and confident attitude returned. "No, I insist. You off soon? Perfect."

The pause seemed to indicate a scene change, and you gasped when your ears were filled with the sound of lips smacking and heavy pants that you could almost feel on your skin.

"Mierda," the panting continued, "keep playing in my hair like that I'm gonna keep you up all night." a hearty chuckle followed by a loud slick sound had your thighs clenching, "would you like that, chiquita? Then how about-,"

The audio cut off there, and you wanted to chuck your phone at the wall. What the fuck? What the fuck was that! You let out an irritated breath before clicking on the profile. You choked on a cough.

You were no newbie to the realms of internet personalities or seeing people's personal interests. You had mutuals who posted fanfics and also sold sex content. There were people at your school who would be seen as uppity that enjoyed streaming RPG walkthroughs. It wasn't that surprising but...

Fucking Miguel O'Hara? Fuck.

It was an account where he teased his audio works as well as promoted others. You couldn't believe it. That gorgeous man could be a model, and he was also using his voice to make some cash? Honestly, good for him, but now you were left with a little problem that wasn't going away as you scrolled to see what other works he had. You bit your nail a little when you saw you could buy an promotional audio for $1. You groaned internally...Fuck it.

~~~

You were burning up and tried to figure out how you got in so deep.

It had been a few weeks since your...discovery, and you were screaming mentally on the inside. You didn't think a voice could get you so hot and bothered, but you found yourself going down that rabbit hole with a few late-night purchases to your totally unaware partner. It was funny in a sense because you remembered how nervous and kinda awkward Miguel sounded in your Public Speaking class. You noticed it a little when you guys met for your project when he had to speak to cashiers or other classmates he didn't really know well.

It was cute, to be honest. You could tell he was a little self-conscious about it, but it was hard for you to believe Miguel didn't know about his effect on people. Even now, he took you out to celebrate the spectacular presentation you two gave at a local coffee shop. He must have stuttered or something since he was scratching the back of his head, but the barista just beamed at him and batted her eyelashes. You couldn't blame her really.

It was just such a night-and-day situation. That man was so confident sounding in his works and in Spanish, but when there was the occasional slip-up he blushed.

Your drink was placed in front of you, and you looked up with a smile. "Gracias."

Miguel smiled softly at you. "Claro," he took a seat in front of you and stretched. "I'm glad we did well."

"Same," you took a sip of your drink, "but it's not like you weren't going to." you added nonchalantly.

Miguel quirked an eyebrow. "Hmm, why you say that?"

"You know your stuff, and you can speak well." you answered easily.

Miguel brought his drink to his lips, and your eyes glanced at it. I think that's the drink he ordered in that teaser. Your eyes shot up at the thought. Stop. Stop! Don't do that. You've been doing good, self. Not when we're in front of him! "Everything okay?"

"Huh!" you perked up and then giggled awkwardly. "Yeah, yeah."

The man continued. "Well, I try my best. I just don't want to look dumb in front of people."

You kissed your teeth with a shake of the head. "You definitely don't look dumb, trust me."

Miguel looked at your curiously. "Then what do people think of me?"

You tried to stop your brain from glitching. There was no way this man didn't know how attractive he was--at least not completely. "Well uh," you grabbed your phone as a diversion, "let me show you this video! There's this girl who went to Puerto Rico and-," you tapped quickly on your phone while disconnecting your headphones, but wasn't really paying attention as you moved frantically.

"Ah coño, you feeling good, mi corazon?" A deep moan followed. "Do you like that? Let me give you some more. "

You froze. He froze. You made a short squeal as you slammed your phone down, wanting to run out immediately. You thought you closed that tab. Why didn't you close that tab? Fuck, he totally heard that!

Miguel was slow to speak. "What was that?" you blinked and made a dismissive sound. Miguel lowered his voice a little bit. "What was that, mami?"

You know your panic was displayed on your face, but you continued to play dumb. "I have no idea what you're talking about...anyway, so here's that vid-,"

Miguel's chuckle cut you off. It was different than his normal one. It was deeper, meaner--the one he used professionally. "Ah, it's not good to lie, bebita." he leaned in closer so only you could hear him. "You like my voice? It turns you on?" he growled lowly.

You refused to look at him. You turned to the side and played with your straw. "Mi-Miguel, we're in public." A mumble. You felt your face warm up significantly; you changed your posture a little and unconsciously rubbed your thighs together.

His low snicker went down your body. "So? I bet you were listening to that earlier. Was it while you were at the library? Supposed to be working, but you wanna hear me call you a good girl and think about how wet my fingers would sound inside you?" You bit your lip then released a shaky breath. "Mirame, chiquita," he watched you turn a little and meet his gaze. He grinned. "Que bueno" he looked you up and down and licked his lips. "Wanna hear something else?" you nodded a little. "Words," (Look at me, little girl./How nice)

"Yes, Miguel."

"Good girl."

~~~

You fidgeted nervously as you sat up straight on Miguel's bed and tried to avoid eye-contact. He was looking down at you completely smug after not saying a word to you on the way over. You were lost in your thoughts, but now, you could only hear the thumping of your heart in your chest.

"Tell me pretty girl," you nearly jumped finally hearing him, "did you get off to my voice?" you opened your mouth to speak, "Mirame."

Slowly, you did, and the sight was wicked. Miguel looked as cocky as you imagined him to. The angle of him looking down at you while you sat made the situation all the more intense and seductive. His eyes devoured you and told you that he was completely in control of the situation--enjoying it.

"I did."

He made a non-committal grunt--glancing around his room in thought. "I want to see."

Your body lit up. "What!"

Miguel chuckled. "Why not? You want me to give you instructions?"

You squeaked. "No! That's not the point...it's just embarrassing."

"Aww, but you did it all those nights at home." he leaned by your ear, "Imagining it was me making all those wet pussy sounds with my mouth. I bet you were hoping I'd find out." he watched as you squirmed from the sheer proximity and how he spoke. His voice dropped lower. "I bet you're wet now." he huffed.

"Miguel," you whined. You were asking for something, but even you weren't sure what exactly.

"What, baby?" he grinned.

You grumbled for a moment before yanking his collar towards you and smacking your lips together. You kissed him to shut him up, but maybe that wasn't a good idea either. Miguel met yours enthusiasm and groaned at the feeling of spark finally igniting. He leaned further in, and you found yourself on your back wrapping your arms around your neck.

He caged you in with his thighs before moving away to tease up and down your neck. He bit and sucked all over--memorizing what and where made you make a certain sound. "Ah there you go. You can make as much noise as you want for me." his words vibrated throughout you. You reached up and rubbed your fingers through his hair and along his scalp. He groaned. "Mmm, someone was listening." he moved up just below your ear and took a teasing nibble from your lobe. ''Which one did you like the most?"

It took you a second to realize what he was talking about, but you didn't want him to pull back. You were already this far; no point in shying about now. "The- the brat tamer one...with the neighbor."

Miguel seemed to approve your answer. "Naughty girl," his hands found your hips and slid a little under your shirt, "you need someone to put you in your place? Good thing I caught you being a slut." you whimpered at the name. "You were just gonna let this be your dirty little secret, huh? Playing with yourself after we did our homework--remembering how we chatted so innocently."

You gripped tightly on his shoulders as his hands ran further up while his teeth bit near your collar. "I should blindfold you right now. You don't need to look at me to finish."

"No! No, please. I want more. I wanna see and touch you, please." you took a leg and wrapped it by his knee--trying to bring him closer.

"Greedy and naughty. Tsk, what should I do with you?" Miguel leaned back before taking the hem of his shirt and lifting it away. Your eyes widened at the display of muscles and beautiful brown skin. You licked your lips. "Was this what you were imagining, chiquita?"

Your hand shyly reached out to touch his abs. "This is so much better." you nearly whispered. Miguel chuckled at your compliment. He backed away slowly; then you yelped as your ankle was pulled moving you to the edge of the bed.

You were bright-eyed as you saw Miguel kneel on the floor easily pulling your pants down. You moaned when he started kissing up one leg after throwing it over his shoulder. He massaged the other and wasn't shy to lick up and down--planting kisses and bites.

You gripped the sheets and started panting and wiggling. "That's alright, hermosa. I wanna hear everything from you. Haré música con este coño." He paused once he was closer and took a look at your panties. "All this just from some simple words." It was almost condescending yet admirable how he said it. "You flatter me." (I'll make music with this pussy)

You shrieked as he mouthed you through the cloth. This man was a tease. You shouldn't be surprised, but you were going to get him to cooperate as much as your foggy mind could do.

"Mmm papi chulo, give it to me good. Plesse baby," you begged, and it seemed that Miguel had a weakness for words too. He wasted no time dragging your soaked panties down and toss them behind. He grinned meanly hearing a faint plop sound on the floor. So wet.

Your hand quickly found the back of his head once his tongue made contact on your clit. You didn't think he'd go for it so quickly, but it seemed he was bent on getting you to cum hard and fast. He lapped up your cunt and made it slicker with his drool. He easily lifted you up a little to bring you closer, and you found yourself losing it when he teased by your hole.

He didn't let up--groaning when you gasped after he gave you a finger. He pumped slowly yet consistently and moved his mouth around to give everywhere all of his attention. Soon, your ears could only focus on the sounds that were coming out of your own mouth and the approval from Miguel below. He took a breather to play with your clit and was in daze hearing how it wet and slippery you sounded. You were all pants, moans, and whimpers. He smirked up at you--face shiny and wet.

"You sound so pretty, hermosa. You gonna soak my sheets by the time I'm done with you." you clenched around his fingers. "Mmm, I know baby; you want it badly." he started fingering you faster. "I wouldn't even need my dick to get this pussy squirting." your moans went up a pitch as that knot suddenly got tighter. "Ooo, hermosa. Such a slutty pussy doesn't even need a dick to make her happy. I should've made you cum with my voice, yeah? Say all those filthy things about you being a brat and how you make daddy so mad." you sobbed at that.

"You should've just been a good girl and asked daddy to fuck this pretty cunt of yours." He sped up and you were pulling at the sheets as three fingers made you clench up--going harder and making you fill fuller. "Naughty girls keep secrets. Maybe I'll stop right now."

That got you talking. "No, no, daddy please. Daddy please. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm such a slut and didn't ask for your dick. Please I'll be so good baby. I'll be such a good girl." you babbled on.

Miguel's cock was begging to be free. You knew just what to say it seemed. "Mmm, that's what I want to hear. Come on reina, let me see you make a mess. You gonna cum on my fingers, for me?" Your eyes were rolling to the back of your head as you panted and struggled for air.. Wet sex sounds bounced off the walls, and you were going to be done soon. "Start cumming bebita. I'll fuck you so good after this. Yeah? Give it to me. Right there, mmhm. Fuck there you go." Miguel watched as your release started coating his fingers and dripped onto his wrist. He kept going a little til you started to twitch then slowly decreased to stop.

You were slumped on the bed trying to process what just happened while your body recovered from such an intense orgasm. "Fuck," you said to yourself. You groaned as your legs were gently rubbed, and you could barely glance down at the man.

He was all smiles and innocence despite how he met your gaze and cleaned his fingers. Gosh that mouth was going to be the death of you.

As if he reading your thoughts, he grinned before starting to move. "Let me show you what else my body can do."

~~~

Whew! Oh my gosh, I can't believe I wrote this. I'm actually happy with it. I like how Miguel's personality is and I hope my mediocre Spanish skills weren't a pain. I needed to get this idea out my head, and I'm so happy how this is. Maybe I should try writing audio scripts 🤔Thanks for reading~

(Go download Quinn y'all. You will not be disappointed)

#atsv #migeul o'hara #atsv miguel #spiderman au #miguel x reader #modern au #spicy audio #fem reader #atsv fanfiction #mine #partyanimal167 #college au #miguel smut

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swayziiwriter · 9 months

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Restricted | Pablo Gavi

summary: Pablo teasing you to no ends and restricting your body from coming undone until he thinks you deserve it.

WARNING: 18+, sexual content

Although the room is cool, arousal is igniting your bodies. By the way, you're completely naked, and Pablo only has a pair of tight briefs that strain his rock-solid cock. It would be an understatement to say that you can only see the outline of it. You could have sworn that at least three times vou saw it twitch.

His tongue has been dipping in and out of your wet hole for the better part of fifteen minutes, the majority of his mouth is focused on your increasingly sensitive clit, with every muscle working hard to suck, tease, and kiss the bundle of nerves.

You haven't been given the endowment of even one climax in those twenty minutes in any case, the solicitations coming from your beau's enlarged and pussy juice-covered lips demanding you not let go right now and on the off chance that you can hang on now.

Pablo's tongue laps progressively quicker as the seconds pass, your eyes nearly getting wetter than your splashed twat over how out of line he's at this moment. The screams coming out of your mouth are already getting even more frantic as you uncontrollably tug at his dark ringlets of hair.

"Fuck, Pablo, please," you prolong the last syllable of that supplication to show that you are so frantic to complete all around his full lips and gifted tongue, spine bending much more trying to make him adjust his perspective; change everything he has planned and just let you rub your cum on his chin and mouth.

You can't understand how he can stop eating out your pulsating cunt and leave you unfulfilled so easily as his lips pull away from you before his large hands bring your shaking legs together. You let out a secret whine of frustration from your throat.

Pablo gets up and sits on the sofa right next to you, feet firmly planted on the wooden floor, biting his bottom lip to keep from smirking.

"I promised that I would make all of the teasing worthwhile, mi amor?"

When you lay your palms on his chest and kiss back with all the misplaced fervour you'd lost while chasing a high that never came from when his lips were lower down your body, he leans in to plant a small kiss on your pouting lips, unintentionally deepening it. Your own lips parted a little to produce breathy moans as you whine against his soft mouth. Before he takes your mouth in his again and the two of you are now passionately making out on the couch.

Pablo partially gapes his mouth while taking in all the sounds and sighs emanating from your throat. Pablo pulls away from you before you can get carried away in each other's wandering hands, leaving a final kiss on your flustered face. "Ven y quédate aquí mi amor."

He spreads his legs and taps his left thigh, the one nearest to you, and you randomly turn over in sheer urgency, the possibility of your wetness on his uncovered skin making a scrumptiously expecting to feel in the lower part of your stomach.

As you hover over his thigh, Pablo can experience the intensity of your pussy from inches away, swallowing at the manner in which your breathing gets shakier before you position yourself on his conditioned muscle with a fulfilled moan.

He calls you a "good girl" as you put both of your hands on his shoulders to secure yourself. His hands then grab you by the hips and hold you in place. "Want to ride me bebe? ride my thigh until you get the recognition you deserve for being my good girl?" You clench down on his warm skin as a result of his vehement words. You haven't done this previously not set in stone to put on an act for Pablo and to partake in the prizes of a very much anticipated climax at long last.

You give him a hasty nod and shift all of your weight onto your hands and, consequently, his shoulders. You then slightly raise your body before coming back down on him, making a shameless moan when your cunt touches his thigh.

"Yes, Pablo," you whimper out, hips shaking to run your dangerous center all over him. Your own arousal and his earlier spit help to smooth out your gyrating movements, which only make you move harder and faster on your lover's thigh.

Pablo tells you, "You're doing such a good job, sweetheart, fuck," as he guides you away from him. The slickness of your pussy has enraged him beyond comprehension. Still, you're making a mess, aren't you?” He examines the skin on his left thigh, which is now glistening with your juices, from below. You whine even more, panting into his lip parting, but you don't move your eyes from his face. Fuck, Pablo you feel better."

He grasps onto your hips harder, certainly leaving an injury really taking shape, yet you couldn't care less, the sensation of his strong thigh so radiant under your doused folds.

"You close, bebé? Let me help you," Pablo is now pounding you against him, almost causing you to lunge at him with your entire body. Again, you don't mind because the sensation is so good that the pretty image of his gritted teeth and dark furrowed brows makes your brain feel dizzy. The spectacle below you and in front of you makes your clit throb.

He is now whining, his voice becoming ever so slightly higher, "want you to cum on my thigh, darling, need you to cum on my thigh." "Let go of me, angel, you deserve it, baby girl; cum all over me." He puts the very tip of his thumb over your clit, and the contrast of the friction against the wet squelches of your cunt rubbing on him makes you almost scream.

You whine, "Pablo fuck, i'm so close, please," not knowing what you're really requesting because Pablo is giving you his all, with his head down and his lips now on your left nipple, sucking and swirling it with his tongue to fuel the journey to your orgasm.

The sounds of your sopping cunt and your lover's quiet groans warm the air around you as your meowing and moaning get louder. Before he can align his face with yours, Pablo pops his mouth off your tit.

"Cum for me, mi amor" he coos, hands now at your midsection to get a more focused control of your quickly moving body. "Haven't you sweetheart, been working so hard and so good for me, my bebé deserves to cum?" He abruptly flexes his thigh, the muscle appearing to have the potential to almost penetrate you.

The coil in your lower stomach snaps as a result. The exhilarating sensation extends all the way to your weeping pussy, where you make an unholy mess on Pablo's thigh, spilling your cum onto his warm skin.

Before Pablo can catch it with his mouth, you let out a belter of a scream that almost sounds like anguish. His tongue slips in to cradle yours as your moans get smaller and smaller before leaving his lips. pussy currently grasping on him, he increases the kiss, directing you to set down on the couch as he adjusts on top of you, hands actually fastened on the shape of your abdomen, yours presently snared around his neck.

His mouth is as hardworking as ever right now, dancing against yours in a heatedly sweet manner, and your aching legs instinctively wrap around him. Although neither of you wanted to, it feels like hours before you both pull away for air. Pablo leaves a sincerely profound kiss all the rage prior to maneuvering his face up to investigate your eyes.

"So pretty for me, bebé" he mutters, dropping down to leave kisses on your neck as you make a move to gasp out the impacts of your climax and pause and rest at last. "Always so perfect for me." You experience his cock twitch, becoming hard once more. This time on your inner thigh. You're not completely exhausted, you think.

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iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia · 10 months

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The Arcana HCs: Asra and Faust's Birthday

~ it's June 13, so here's how MC might celebrate Asra and Faust's birthday with them. Enjoy! - brainrot ~

You let them sleep in until they're ready to get up

You, on the other hand, sneak out early to collect supplies. For what, some might ask? Well, he's not the only one good at keeping secrets ~

Faust is happy to accompany you while her master snoozes, especially as you promised her unlimited chin scritches and she is determined to get as much out of that as she can

You want them to enjoy a slow morning, so you leave any plans for the afternoon and work on breakfast while the golden morning sun lights up the kitchen

Faust keeps watch so you can focus, and you know Asra's opening his eyes when you hear her excited little voice shouting Awake! Awake! into your mind

This is your cue to climb back in bed to snuggle with them. Breakfast can wait ...

When he is ready to get up, you'll be able to bring him breakfast. One of your errands involved swinging by Selasi's stall, and the lovely baker has given you samples of all his test recipes because he knows how much Asra adores new and unusual things

Selasi also helped you fashion a mini paper party hat for Faust

Now the three of you are piled on the overstuffed, rumpled bed, eating and giggling and watching Faust pose with her hat

You also have to keep coming up with excuses for why Asra isn't allowed to look around certain parts of the shop - pieces of your surprise are stashed in several different corners

"MC -" they're giggling at the edge of the bed, only pretending to struggle against where you have your hands pressed over their eyes to keep them from getting up or peeking. "Tell me what it is!"

Never tell! Faust is wriggling along his shoulders in her own intimidation game, trying her best not to be dislodged by Asra's happy laughter. Friend surprise!

"A surprise, hm?" They get suspiciously still. "How about this?" And the cushion they swing at you is the start of a pillow fight that turns the whole bedroom into a mess

You're trying to figure out how to keep things hidden while cleaning up at the same time when you hear a knock at the door

Right on cue, Aisha and Salim are standing in your shop with beaming smiles on their faces. You bundle Asra out the door to spend lunch with them and spend the next hour or so tidying and closing up

The next stage of your surprise begins when Muriel arrives at your doorstep to help you carry several things up to the palace. Most of what you bring gets whisked away to the gardens under Nadia's watchful eye, and Portia takes the last few bundles with a wink

You stick around for a few hours, helping to set up the majority of the more magical items and finalizing the evening plans. As it nears tea time, you collect a new bundle from Nadia and set off for Aisha and Salim's house

So far things seem to be progressing even more smoothly than you expected. Asra opens the door for you, confused because their parents told them to wait here for you while they went to "run some errands"

"MC?" He eyes the bundle under your arm curiously, a bemused smile on his face. "Is it time for the next part of your mysterious plan?"

"Not yet." You drag them to the couch and pull them down next to you. "Now we take a nap."

He's not arguing with that. You doze with him, knowing that the coming night is going to be longer than he can guess. You shake him gently awake as the sun begins to set, brewing him a quick cup of tea before you hand him the first bundle

"I can open this now?" They smile teasingly and purposefully fumble with the wrappings

Inside is a lovely new set of clothes, Nadia's gift. They're styled and tailored perfectly enough to be suitable for any party, and yet as durable and practical as the best traveling gear

It's twilight when you walk across the palace bridge hand in hand. You can hear and smell the festivities wafting from the palace gardens, and even better is the thrill of curiosity and excitement in Asra's fingertips when he squeezes your hand

They're prepared to be dazzled by whatever delights you and Nadia have clearly conspired to create, but they don't expect the number of people present when the two of you enter the grounds

All of them people he knows, all of them people he's friends with, but so many he assumed he didn't mean anything to. He was expecting to see under ten people, but this number is easily over thirty

They can't remember a time when they were considered a part of a community. For as long as they can remember, they've been a wanderer who found home with the two people they felt most connected to, with no permanent place or support system

This is different. Seeing all these recognizable Vesuvian faces in one place is the proof that there is a community around him, and that this community has a spot for them in it

The evening is magical. There's all kinds of food laid out with puzzles to solve to unlock different dishes, there's floating magical bubbles which play out different comical scenes in whorls of colorful light when they're popped, and there's a game of riddles that lead him on the silliest scavenger hunt Vesuvia's ever seen

Eventually it becomes late enough that even the night owls are beginning to get tired. Muriel disappears briefly and returns with two traveling packs, which he trades with you wordlessly for the shop key

Asra watches in delighted confusion. "MC, there's more? Where are you taking me?"

"Where do you think?" You bid everyone your goodbyes together, Aisha and Salim adding their own mysterious "see you soon"s, and then you're taking their hand and walking through the silvery moonlit fields to meet with a familiar beast

A very sleepy Faust curls herself up under Asra's shirt as the two of you take off. His head turns so he can speak in your ear over the rush of the wind

"We're going to Nopal?"

"Nopal first," you murmur back, "and Zadith after. Your parents say they want to show us where they learned alchemy - and where you got your name from. We'll meet them on the coast in a few day's time."

You won't always be able to plan elaborate garden parties or a month away from the shop for Asra's birthday. But for the dimples that keep appearing and the contented love and joy in their eyes? You'll do it as often as you can

#the arcana #asra the arcana #asra alnazar #happy birthday asra alnazar #the arcana headcanons #the arcana hc #the arcana game #the arcana fluff #asra the magician #asra alnazar x reader #asra x apprentice #ask arcana brainrot #the arcana fanfic

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zape-bun · 11 months

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things I do to prepare my study sessions

Get things so you don't have to stand up from the desk again. Before start the session I fill my water jar, get some coffee, open the window to ventilate the room, wear comfy clothes, and organise the books and notes I'm gonna need.

Set a shorter pomodoro. I get easily distracted and I need a constant change of stimulus, so sometimes staying focused for a straight hour is really challenging. The usual 60-10' pomodoro doesn't work for me, but doing 30-5' does. That way I can treat myself with little distractions and get back to study knowing that I don't have to deny myself the positive inputs I need. To set the pomodoros I use this app, that allow me to create a pack of 4 shorter pomos, and then adding more extras if needed. That way I am able to do big study session with very short breaks.

One hour to one task. I organise myself better if I assing a a limited time for each activity, because I have a large amount. If one day I just have one big task, then I divide it in shorter activities. To organise the timetable I use Notion to create a table with the days of the week in the first row and divide each colum into the hours I want to study. I also use a traditional planner to kept track of my progress.

I say hi to my discord buddies. I joined a community of students to study together. You can easily find someone studying at the same time that you. The days I'm struggling a lot to focus I turn on my camera to get that extra pressure and I promise it's super helpful. Having company when you need to run long study session is so much needed. Directs on Twitch can also be helpful, and the Study With Me community is a very nice place to get motivation.

Find a playlist you love. I have tried almost everything, from lo-fi to rain sounds. Lately, what helps me the most are keyboard sounds because they tickle in my brain. Also I like to use youtube playlists like these ones but in a very low volume.

Remember that each person and brain is different. What works for someone may not work for you, and you are not a bad student for that. We deserve to try and find what is the best method for our individual circunstances and lifestyle, not trying to fit in someone else's routine. Don't turn off a method because it's not what the majority of people do. If it works to you, then it works.

Happy study!!

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blueteller · 1 year

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So, Let's Talk Themes in TCF!

"Themes" is such a weird topic for me, not gonna lie... I always feel like it's something you're just supposed to know and feel instinctually – like rhythm in dancing. Which, btw, I'm not really good at. So it's difficult to talk about without that background anxiety that I'll totally flop and miss the point, despite my best intentions.

Still, I decided to give it my best shot anyway, and try to decide what "themes" there are in "Trash/Lout of the Count's Family", and why I like them, because that part is subjective and thankfully, I can decide without freaking out over the "correct" answer.

First, let me make one thing clear: I don't believe TCF was written to convey a single theme or idea. It's an adventure story, and it's supposed to be pure fun. Which it is!! But nevertheless, there is a lot of effort and thought behind it, and I believe that thoughtfulness from the author manifests itself clearly in the overall work, so it's definitely worth talking about.

Now, with that lengthy explanation of what I'm going for out of the way: what are the themes in TCF that I noticed (and like)?

Found Family

Beloved Hypocritical Hero

Overcoming Prejudice

Victory in Working Together

What makes Humanity, what makes a Monster

Healing and Moving Forward

Misunderstandings

Found Family is the most obvious theme, overall, so I don't think it requires much explanation. Cale doesn't "find" his new family on purpose as much and trips all over them, on total accident – then proceeds to adopt them all, despite his inner monologue telling the readers over and over that he intends no such thing. It's pure comedy, but it's also incredibly wholesome and heartwarming. Cale has the biggest, softest heart of them all, and he's the only one who doesn't see it. I wanna squish his cheeks and coo over how cute he is most of the time.

Beloved Hypocritical Hero is the second theme, which isn't apparent at the start. Cale's biased inner monologue does his best to convince us that he's totally selfish, and doesn't intend to be a paragon protagonists who selflessly helps others in the slightest! ...However, over the course of the story it becomes clear that Cale is one, big, fat, liar. He is exactly the sort of hero he constantly denies he is. His whole spitting-blood-from-power-overuse act practically became a meme at this point. Still, despite how frustrating Cale's blatant hypocrisy is, we can't help but love him all the more for it. I'd like to say that he gets better overtime, but.... yeah, personally, I don't see much progress on that front. He did promise Raon he won't get hurt one time, and he managed to keep that promise, but then he (spoiler alert) went ahead and stabbed himself right after, so. Yeah. Cale is a hero and a hypocrite and we all love him. That's definitely a major theme in the story.

Overcoming Prejudice is the best way I found to describe the whole plot of "anti-darkness attribute" propaganda in TCF. What I love about it is that the author found a much more interesting way to convey the theme than just make it about "fantasy racism". It isn't just about the Dark Elves, it's about Necromancers too, and all people using dead mana. The best part is that dead mana is, in fact, used by the very higher-ups who spread the prejudice in the first place, proving without a doubt that it's all 100% hypocrisy and there is nothing wrong with dead mana in the first place. It's all propaganda, and it serves a purpose. The true beauty of this plot unfolds when the Sun Twins show up, and Cale brings in Mary to help Hannah with her dead mana poisoning. Jack goes through an entire arc of realizing what "true light" is, and that despite the "voice of the Sun God" constantly ringing in his ears to eradicate all darkness, he comes to his own conclusion that it isn't what the power is, it's about what ones does with the power. It's just, beautiful. I feel like that part of the story doesn't get enough credit. Mary is one of my favorite characters, and Jack and Hannah combo is amazing as well. Definitely one of my favorite plotlines in TCF.

Victory in Working Together is another obvious theme throughout the story. It isn't just reserved for the good guys, either: the bad guys have a ton of alliances, too. The difference is that the good side is based on genuine intent, without stabbing each other in the backs, while the bad guys only pretend as long as they need to, then throw away their "allies" to the wolves when it's convenient. It's portrayed less as a "message" and more of a purely pragmatic fact: to get anywhere, you need to have support. Cale knows this from the start, which is why he manages to make so many allies in such a short time. This theme is simply about being able to overcome the biggest of obstacles, as long as you honestly work together with others and put all your effort into it. It is the simplicity of it makes it so effective, in my opinion.

What makes Humanity, what makes a Monster is an interesting one for sure. In a world full of so many interesting races, the final boss is – always – human. Be it Venion Stan, Redika, Prince Adin, Queen Elisneh, the White Star, or even the Sealed God – all of the main villains are either purely human or started off that way. I think it's very much deliberate, in order to show how what makes these people evil isn't some in-born characteristic; but only their choices. Not to say that non-human characters aren't ever bad, of course not – there is a bunch of evil non-human characters all over the story. But evil, true evil, is always a choice. And thus, non-human characters who choose good are more "human" than the "monsters wearing human skins". I won't call it an allegory, because it isn't even as indirect as that: it's a fundamental truth of life that the only real monsters are people who are rotten on the inside. And since the author put so much effort to make all the fantasy races in TCF feel very much human-like, it only makes sense that their choices is the thing that makes them evil, not their race. Even actual Monsters aren't all pure evil in TCF! I truly appreciate it. It's such a simple concept, but it works extremely well.

Healing and Moving Forward is one of the themes which honestly melts my heart. It doesn't simply apply to Cale; it applies to everyone in the cast. Everyone in Cale's group comes in damaged, scarred, hurt or threatened in some way, and comes out better in the end. From the children, to the adults, the entire group heals through their "Found Family" and their quest to defeat the evil forces threatening their world, in order to achieve a peaceful, happy future. Every time we see the evidence of it – like Cale admitting his life is precious, Eruhaben agreeing to extend his life, Choi Han attribute changing, and so on – it feels like an amazing triumph, and yet completely natural and earned. One could simply call it "good character development" and move on, but I see a commond trend and it deserves to make itself a theme of its own. It's not just about everybody finding their place in the family: it's about them growing as family. And doing so, despite their traumatic pasts. And since I once called Cale a "poster child of trauma", it's no wonder he's the one who has the most of "healing" and "moving forward" to do of them all. I hope it continues all throughout book 2!

And of course, I saved Misunderstandings for last. I think the name speaks for itself. TCF is practically a comedy built upon misunderstandings; except misunderstandings of the BEST kind. The misunderstandings where people look upon Cale – tired, in-denial, clueless Cale – and see whatever they need to see the most in the moment: a saviour, an inspiration, a leader, a friend, a parent, and so on. Many misunderstandings result in people seeing Cale in too-good-to-be-true light, which is always funny (Clopeh instantly comes to mind). The thing is: Cale deserves most of it, even if he doesn't believe so. Because it's not about what Cale actually is that matters in those situations: it's about what others need. Cale inspires just by being, well, himself. And that inspiration is what changes people. It's Cale doing his best and affecting others, that makes all the huge waves of change. In my opinion, there is no better misunderstanding than one which results in inspiration: because even if "truth" was revealed later on, the effects of it were 100% real, and something to be grateful for. Imagine if you had a terrible day, and you suddenly saw someone smile at you, and you felt better. Even if the person wasn't actually looking at you in that moment – that doesn't matter!! What matters to you is that your day DID get better, and that person was to thank for! That's the beauty of TCF's misunderstandings. Cale will never truly comprehend the gratefulness of others, without understanding how he can affect them without even trying. ...Then again, his obliviousness and hypocrisy is one of the many reasons why we love him 😊

Let me know if there are other themes in TCF you like!

#tcf #trash of the count's family #lcf #lout of the count’s family #tcf meta #themes #story themes #analysis #character analysis #misunderstandings #cale henituse #tcf mary #the sun twins #tcf jack #tcf hannah

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borathae · 1 year

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↳ Index [Chapter 04 - Backseats]

Pairing: Jungkook x Taehyung

Warnings: very graphic Smut, angsty Romance, hatred *wink wink*, cursing, angry sexual tension, sub!Jungkook, hard Dom!Taehyung, sadistic!Taehyung, masochist!Jungkook, Sir kink, car sex, size kink, they both have massive fucking cocks, frotting, major blood kink, using blood as lube (don’t actually do that irl), rough blood drinking, rough anal sex, rough edging, this just really rough yk, graphic dirty talk, degradation, degrading nicknames (bitchboy, slut, whore, fuckhole, cum dump), forced?stripping (he rips off his clothes), rough choking & breathplay, slapping, spanking, face fucking with fingers, drool & tears, Tae quite literally fucks Kook stupid, talks about fisting, mentions of voyerism, fang examination, creampies, biting, peeing from pleasure, Taehyung is a literal demon like wtf my dude, subdrop & regret, but the sweetest aftercare!!, cuddles, post-sex emotional talk, talks about lgbtq+ & vampire struggles, hints to grief & loss, descriptions of past torture, the bonding in this is chef's kiss

Wordcount: 13.7k

a/n: honestly i am 😶 i don't even know what to say other than bruh 😶 disclaimer: this is a work of fiction and does not portray their actual relationship.

Munich. That’s where your journey is taking you next. You left in the grey of the morning, sharing the cars Yoongi’s contact managed to deliver to you. Two black SUVs with their back windows tinted and enough space to house each of you comfortably. You shared the car with Yoongi and Jungkook, while the rest shared the other car.

The drive was quiet, except for the music you played on the radio. Jungkook took on the job as DJ and the songs he picked out were all very nice. He also filled the car with his singing, which you and Yoongi enjoyed greatly. If he wasn’t singing, he either looked out the window or chatted with you. After all, you and he had a lot of catching up to do.

He told you about his progress and you praised him for being so hardworking. He also told you about his guitar lessons with Yoongi and you made them promise you that they would play something for you very soon. While you told him about the progress with the estate to which he said that he can’t wait to see it. You also chatted about your shared time at the university to which both vampires said that they would never try again as the experience was less exciting than they thought it would be.

Upon arriving, you had just about enough time to check into your rooms before your schedule already dragged you out of the comfort of your temporary home again, to instead meet in the lobby. You were hungry, so Hoseok agreed on taking you out for late lunch to the hotel restaurant. Yoongi agreed to accompany Seokjin on his search for Emma as his contact in Munich didn’t have time today and he would have had free time either way. Which left Taehyung and Jungkook with the duty to follow a trail to a supposed meeting of Namjoon’s followers. Jungkook volunteered and somehow Taehyung wanted to come with him, which earned him a weird look from Jungkook.

They are taking one of the SUVs to the location. An abandoned soap factory a little outside of Munich with its windows boarded up and the gates chained up. Yoongi showed them a picture. Jungkook drives while Taehyung tells him the way. The drive was silent for the first third of it. Tension hangs in the air. It is heavy and thick.

“Do you listen to music?” Taehyung asks into the uncomfortable silence. The sound of his voice almost startled Jungkook. He was so used to the suffocating quiet.

“Yes”, he answers him dryly.

“Do you want to listen to music?”

“I guess.”

Taehyung turns the radio on.

“News”, he says.

“Change the channel.”

Taehyung does exactly that. The newest pop song is playing. They tuned in on it in the middle of its verse. The singer sings about breaking up with her boyfriend to get back with her ex. It’s a stupid song and neither vampire enjoys it. It’s better than radio news however. Or tense silence.

“That’s better, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, better than news."

“I agree”, Taehyung says, “you have to take the next turn left.”

“Mhm.”

Jungkook changes into the correct lane after looking over his shoulder. The red light stops them at the junction. There are three cars behind them and a small car is right next to them. They tower over it.

Jungkook stares at the light obsessively, while Taehyung glances at Jungkook. The latter feels his eyes on him with such intensity that he wants to scream. The tension between them feels suffocating to Jungkook.

“I think of what we did often”, Taehyung confesses.

Jungkook clenches his jaw, tightening his fingers on the steering wheel.

“I sometimes wish that our situation would have been different. That we did what we did because we wanted it to happen”, Taehyung says, running his eyes up and down the side of Jungkook’s face. The frown on it doesn’t confuse him.

“I have this fantasy with you”, he says.

“Keep it to yourself.”

Taehyung ignores him.

“I have this fantasy with you. That we were at a kink party instead of the prison cell and that you did what you did to me because we wanted to engage in kink with each other.”

The light switches to green. Jungkook drives off quickly, taking the turn with a certain kind of anger. Taehyung’s body sways from left to right because of it.

“You have to take the second right turn now.”

“Mhm.”

“And afterwards we would have fucked on the floor”, Taehyung continues, soaking the air with more and more heavy tension.

Jungkook shifts into fourth gear. Taehyung watches how his tattooed fingers close around the gearstick. He presses his legs together because of it. The view reminds him of what he did to him.

“Why did you refuse to fuck me when I offered? I was helpless, you could have taken me however you wanted to. You could have done so over and over again until I would have been reduced to nothing.”

Jungkook glances at Taehyung from the corner of his eyes. The explicit nature of Taehyung’s words flusters him.

“You could have ruined me. Why didn’t you?” Taehyung asks him.

“Because I didn’t want to fuck you.”

“You didn’t want to?”

Jungkook frowns. Taehyung follows his hand as he slips it back onto the steering wheel.

“I don’t want to”, Jungkook grumbles.

“Are you certain?”

“Very.”

“Truly?”

Jungkook stays quiet, taking the second turn right.

“You have to keep driving until the street ends. We should be there then.”

“Mhm.”

Taehyung lowers his phone to his lap, turning his knees to Jungkook.

“Do you know how to fuck?”

“Why should I tell you that?”

“Because I am trying to figure out why you didn’t take me.”

“You’re so fucking self-obsessed. Maybe I just didn’t want to be close to you.”

“So why did you kiss me?”

Jungkook grinds his teeth.

“Why did you suck my cock?”

Jungkook almost breaks the steering wheel.

“Those things are both very intimate.”

“They weren’t. I just wanted to show you what I could do.”

“So you wanted to show off?”

“No”, Jungkook hisses, “listen man. I did what I did because you deserved it. You needed to know how it is when someone forces you to lose control. What I did to you meant nothing to me.”

“Are you certain?”

“Yes.”

“Truly?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“That’s your own fault then.”

Taehyung studies his face.

“Also, I know how to fuck.”

“Do you?”

“Yes. I’m not a fucking idiot.”

“I never said that you were”, Taehyung scoots closer to Jungkook, making the latter shift nervously, “how good are you?”

“Very.”

Jungkook has no idea why he tells Taehyung such details about his life. And most importantly, why he lies. He and Taehyung both know that Jungkook can’t fuck people because of his curse. Jungkook still lies. He doesn’t know why. Maybe it’s stupidity. Maybe it’s pride. He doesn’t know.

“Do you take cock or do you give it?”

Jungkook shifts, glancing at Taehyung.

“Why should I tell you?”

“I wasn’t the one who continued to talk about it.”

Jungkook frowns, pressing his lips together just so he couldn’t talk again. He said too much. Stupid fucking competitiveness. Why does he always need to prove to anyone that he is the best at everything? Now Taehyung probably thinks that this was his invitation to fuck.

“You should have showed me back then”, Taehyung says.

“Keep dreaming”, Jungkook grumbles and turns off the engine, “we’re here”, he says, leaving the car. He slams the door on his way out.

Taehyung watches him stomp to the closed gate and then begin tugging at it. Taehyung enjoys today. He doesn’t feel as sad in Jungkook’s presence as he does on other occasions. The thrill of getting Jungkook to confess his attraction to him distracts Taehyung. Just like a good hunt does, it fills him with endorphins. That is why he volunteered to go with him. Because being with Jungkook distracts Taehyung from the fact that his best friend died.

Jungkook begins ripping at the thick chains which keep the gate locked. He seems to be struggling, which surprises Taehyung as he expected Jungkook to be able to rip through chains. A training Ripper of his age should be able to break chains. Taehyung’s eyes flit to the exposed tattoos on Jungkook’s arm. Unless those tattoos mean… Taehyung widens his eyes. Jungkook lost his arm as a human. That is why he is struggling. Because he still has a human arm.

Taehyung gets out of the car and hurries to Jungkook, feeling the need to help him.

“May I help you?” Taehyung asks Jungkook, resting his hand on his shoulder.

Jungkook shakes him off with a hiss.

“No. Piss off”, he hisses.

“Are you struggling?” Taehyung asks him, stepping closer again.

“No”, Jungkook growls and tugs harder. The chains don’t budge. Jungkook curses, dropping them, “it’s fucking useless, they’re rusted shut”, he spits, taking a step back and colliding with Taehyung’s chest.

“Careful”, Taehyung gasps, holding Jungkook’s waist.

“Fuck off”, Jungkook spits, writhing out of the touch, “why do you keep touching me?”

“I wasn’t. You ran into me.”

Jungkook studies Taehyung’s features with a frown. There is this desire to punch him deep inside his chest. Even deeper however, there is the desire to take him and press him against this gate to kiss him just so he would finally shut up. Jungkook hates that feeling.

“Fuck, let’s just leave. It’s useless trying”, he says in hopes of diffusing the tension.

“Let me”, Taehyung says, pushing him to the side. With one tug, the chains fall open, pooling by their feet, “done.”

“Tch. I could have done that too”, Jungkook says, looking to the side in embarrassment.

“And yet you didn’t”, Taehyung says, giving him a flirty grin, “that’s what I’m here for.”

Jungkook feels tingly in his stomach. Involuntary tingles, but tingles nonetheless. He forces them down, tries to ignore them, tightens his jaw.

“Fuck, you’re so annoying. I never should have jerked you off”, Jungkook murmurs and turns to leave.

Taehyung feels butterflies in his stomach. Jungkook addressed it. He initiated it. Oh, the game is getting more and more fun. Taehyung turns with a giggle, looking at Jungkook with a fluttering tummy.

Jungkook stops, opening the car door. He looks at Taehyung.

“What are you staring at? Are you coming or not?” he asks coldly.

“Drive without me. I am going to check it out”, Taehyung says and disappears, leaving Jungkook behind.

“Seriously?” Jungkook says, “fucking prick. Of course you wanna steal all the glory”, he mumbles and gets into the car to drive up the short road to the factory.

Jungkook knew that the situation between him and Taehyung would be awkward once they see each other again. Back when they left you at the motel so you could talk it out with Yoongi, they almost shared a kiss. Taehyung followed Jungkook all the way outside and pressed him against the car and till this day, Jungkook can’t get that moment out of his head. He hates how much he wanted to kiss Taehyung back then and how much he still craves his kiss. He hates it. Hates it so fucking much. He is supposed to loathe him, but he wants to kiss him. Jungkook is so angry at himself for feeling that way.

And now Taehyung is back and it seems that he wants to continue right where they left off. With Jungkook trying his hardest to deny his stupid attraction to him and Taehyung trying way too hard to break his composure.

Jungkook parks the car in front of the factory’s main doors, turning off the engine. The factory doors are ripped out of their hinges and he can hear yelling inside. Jungkook stays seated, staring at his own hands. He needs to think.

There were many nights where he replayed what they did in the prison. He does it right now too. Involuntarily, but still, it’s in his head which makes it too relevant. He repeats Taehyung’s moans and sighs, the way his cock sat in his fingers and how heavy it was on his tongue. Jungkook replays their shared kiss and the taste of the blood they shared. He replays it and fucking hates that he gets off to it. On most nights when those thoughts hit him, Jungkook looked for a distraction by letting Yoongi fuck him until he was dumb and brainless, but the distraction only helped for a little while. Jungkook was attracted to Taehyung ever since the night they shared. There was no denying that. And no amount of distraction could help him get rid of it.

Jungkook gets out of the car. He has to help Taehyung. If he wanted to or not. Taehyung was still part of the team and Jungkook shouldn’t slack on protecting his teammates. He closes his leather jacket and puts on his gloves. He needs to make sure his tattoos are covered. It could end badly for him otherwise. His thoughts are racing as he gets ready for the fight.

He should have known that something like sharing blood with Taehyung would establish a bond between them. It’s Jungkook after all and Jungkook doesn’t have enough control over his nature yet to distinguish between honest attraction and the attraction a blood bond forms. And right now the attraction they share feels way too goddamn real to him.

He slams the car door shut. Stupid Taehyung. Why did he have to tempt him so much? Jungkook stomps up the short path and enters the factory, squeaking in shock when a person collides with the wall next to him.

They turn into dust on impact, leaving Jungkook to cough and stumble away.

“What the hell is going on here?” he says, eyes flitting to Taehyung chasing after the last remaining vampire. The grounds are covered in dust. At least ten piles of them. Maybe even more. Jungkook can’t tell. The factory grounds are too dirty.

“Please don’t. Why are you doing this?!” the vampire screams as they flee.

Taehyung jumps and uses the momentum to rip off the vampire’s head. He lands skilfully, dropping the head of the vampire he just killed. Their body turns to dust within seconds.

“Stay dead”, he says coldly and wipes the blood off of his face.

This felt good. It felt better than last time. Last time left him out of control and in pain. This time around, he was in complete control and it felt healing to rip through Namjoon’s followers. One vampire at a time he will avenge Jimin’s death. Taehyung felt great killing if it meant that his best friend will be avenged.

Sharp pain shoots through his hand. Taehyung looks at it. His knuckles are bruised from breaking them on a vampire’s face. He moves his fingers, hissing in discomfort, “fractured.”

It will heal, so Taehyung doesn’t really care. He does care about his clothes however. A grey suit with a white button up. It was tailored to his figure. The fabric is soaked in black blood. Some of it is his own, most of it is the blood of the vampires he just murdered.

“This suit is ruined”, he murmurs, using his handkerchief to clean his chest even if it was beyond saving. “Oh, how terrible. I won’t ever get this clean again. How terribly annoying.”

“Ahem.”

Taehyung turns to Jungkook upon hearing him clear his throat. The young Ripper is staring at him in a mixture of disbelief, awe and disgust.

“Finally you are here”, Taehyung says, strutting to Jungkook, “I already took care of it.”

“I can see that. What the hell, man? What if they weren’t even Namjoon’s followers?”

“Trust me, they were”, Taehyung says, running his eyes up and down Jungkook’s body, “you look mad. I’m sorry, did you want to join in on the fun?”

“No, I’m actually-”, Jungkook pushes Taehyung to the side.

“Oh? Dear”, Taehyung gasps, grasping Jungkook’s arm for support. He feels disoriented for a moment until his eyes land on the unknown vampire jumping at them.

Jungkook stops him before he could latch himself onto Taehyung by grabbing him by his throat and slamming him down onto the ground.

“No wait. Wait. Wait, please. No. Plea-”, Jungkook rips out the vampire’s heart, silencing him for all eternity.

He exhales shakily, staring at the vampire’s face and watching as it turns to dust beneath him.

“Fuck”, he presses out. Killing doesn’t get easier. Yoongi always says that he shouldn’t feel bad if the person he killed was trying to harm him. That it was self defence and that he did what he needed to do to protect him and the group. But the killing doesn’t get easier. Jungkook still feels disgust at himself whenever he ends someone’s life.

He stands up, looking at his hands. They are shaking. He balls them to fists, trying to calm himself that way. It helps a little.

One deep breath. Another breath. One more because it helps. Then he turns, eyes locking onto Taehyung.

The older vampire is looking at him. Awe and gratefulness.

“Well, thank you. I must have missed him”, Taehyung says.

“I didn’t do it for you”, he hisses and then his eyes flit to the stake in Taehyung’s shoulder, “oh my god”, he gasps, hurrying back to Taehyung, “you’re hurt”, he says, tugging Taehyung closer by his waist.

“What? Ah!” Taehyung yelps, writhing in pain as Jungkook pulls out the stake. He didn’t even notice it. His adrenaline is way too high. He does feel the stake right now however, as Jungkook pulls it out of him with a strong arm around his waist.

“Careful, ah careful.”

“I’m already done. Quit whining”, Jungkook says, dropping the stake on the ground.

Taehyung hisses in discomfort, touching his own shoulder.

“I didn’t even notice it. He must have aimed for my heart, but missed when you pushed him away.”

“Probably.”

“Ah, it really aches.”

Jungkook rips Taehyung’s hand away to inspect the wound. Taehyung allows him with bated breath. Jungkook is still holding his waist.

“Do you feel splinters?” Jungkook asks, furrowing his brows in concentration.

“No.”

“You’ll heal.”

“Yes, lucky me”, Taehyung says, glancing down at Jungkook’s arm. Strong and protective. That’s how his touch feels. Taehyung places his hands on Jungkook’s chest, “thank you, Jungkook”, he whispers, bashful eyes flitting to his lips.

Jungkook gulps. Taehyung’s touch feels intense. He only realises now that he is holding his waist. What the hell is he doing here? He is holding Taehyung’s waist. What the fuck’s wrong with him?

He pulls away to escape whatever situation they were in.

“You’re so fucking annoying, stop trying to flirt with me”, he hisses, bumping shoulders with Taehyung as he runs away.

Taehyung however runs after Jungkook, catching up with him once they are outside.

“Hey”, he says, reaching for Jungkook’s wrist.

“Let go of me”, Jungkook hisses, shaking Taehyung’s hand off.

Taehyung circles Jungkook, studying the younger vampire from head to toe whilst walking backwards.

“What’s wrong?” he asks him.

Jungkook stops, pushing at Taehyung’s chest. It makes the latter take a step back before he catches himself again. He touches his own shoulder. The wound is almost healed, but the impact of Jungkook’s hands still made it sting.

“Stop acting like this. Stop acting like I’m into you”, Jungkook hisses.

“So you’re not?”

“No?” Jungkook laughs in disbelief, “you’re a freaking prick, I prefer nice guys.”

“I can be pretty nice too.”

“Yeah sure, keep dreaming.”

Taehyung steps closer, making Jungkook stumble back.

“Shall I show you how nice I can be?” Taehyung asks in a flirty rasp.

Jungkook pushes at Taehyung’s chest.

“Leave me alone. You’re so weird”, he spits with his voice pitched.

And with that he stomps off to the car.

But Taehyung isn’t having it. He runs after the younger vampire, rounding him in big steps until they are facing each other again.

“Fuck off”, Jungkook spits and turns so Taehyung was gone from his vision again.

Taehyung however follows.

“Why did you hold me that way?”

“Fuck off.”

“Is it because you wanted to protect me?”

“No. It was instinct.”

“Instinct? So you care for me enough protect me instinctively.”

“Stop twisting my words. I never said that.”

Taehyung steps closer. Jungkook stumbles away with his eyes glued to Taehyung’s lips.

“Go on, Kook. Say that you want me.”

“I want you to scurry off, that’s what I want.”

Another twirl. In perfect synch, almost as if the two men were in an angry dance of who can hold out longer. Jungkook, who is hellbent on believing his own lies. Or Taehyung, who is hellbent on pushing Jungkook’s buttons to the point of no return.

“Leave me alone.”

Another turn. Taehyung follows, keeping close to Jungkook.

“Go on Kook, tell me that you’re into me.”

“I’m not. I hate you.”

“You may hate me, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t want to fuck me.”

Another twirl. Taehyung seems to be closer than ever. Their lips are almost touching, their breaths are intermingling.

“Well, you’re wrong. I don’t wanna fuck you.”

“Of course not”, Taehyung smirks, grips Jungkook’s hips and presses the man against the car.

Jungkook gasps, fighting Taehyung’s grip by squirming, “you want to be fucked by me.”

Jungkook stops squirming, gawking at Taehyung with widened eyes.

“Mhm? Be honest Jungkook. You’re not thinking about fucking me. No, you are thinking about getting fucked by me. Hard and good.”

“N-no”, Jungkook stutters, blinking his eyes rapidly.

“I know what you’re into. I know you’re only getting off when someone fists your tight ass.”

“What the hell? How, how do you know that?”

“I listened.”

“What the fuck?”

“Trust me, standing in a cell gets rather boring. I had to find something to pass the time. Granted, listening to you scream like a whore wasn’t my first choice, but it’s better than silence.”

Jungkook convulses in Taehyung’s tight grasp in both disgust and excitement. He hates being exposed just as much as he loves it.

“You’re fucked up.”

“Pretty much, yes.”

“And I don’t fuck with people like you”, Jungkook tries.

“Now, now I’m pretty sure you do.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because I know you”, Taehyung smiles menacingly, “I know the cravings people like you have. The bigger the better. Bigger and bigger because nothing truly fills you up how you would want it to.”

“So? Even if I do, what’s that got to do with you?”

“Have you seen my cock?” Taehyung asks and laughs tauntingly, “my real cock, I mean?”

Jungkook can’t stop himself from looking down. He heard about that, he heard about how some vampires can get their cocks to grow. His own does it too when he is too excited. He didn’t think that Normals could do it. But then.

Jungkook looks at Taehyung’s bloodied face. Strands of his dark hair are soaked in it too, hanging into his features messily.

Taehyung has never been normal. He may be vast of cursed blood in his veins, but he is just as twisted as any other Ripper Jungkook knows. Maybe he is even worse.

“Course I did”, Jungkook croaks, “or have you already forgotten who got you creaming yourself like a chained up loser?”

Jungkook thought that this would do the trick, but he was wrong. Taehyung loves it. Oh, he is living for this, laughing loudly whilst forcing Jungkook harder against the car with a thrust of his hips.

Jungkook stumbles, whimpering quietly.

“You’re amusing me, Kook”, Taehyung rasps, massaging his hips, “I want to tell you a secret.”

Jungkook gulps when Taehyung breaks the distance between their faces just so he can whispers against the shell of his ear.

“I want you like nothing else”, Taehyung confesses and moans, “you have been running through my mind ever since you played with my cock. I just can’t seem to get you out of my system.”

Jungkook swallows down a moan. Taehyung did what Jungkook hated doing. They both thought of it. And while Jungkook hated it, Taehyung loved it. He got off to him. Jungkook actually managed to be someone’s jerk off fantasy. Fuck.

Jungkook lets Taehyung take his hand and then place it on his crotch. He forces down the moan threatening to escape.

“Feel it?” Taehyung asks, “feel how you’re messing with my mind?”

His slacks are stretching around his massive bulge. Jungkook feels how Taehyung twitches as he begins rubbing his hand over it. His deep moan tickles his ear, sending a shiver down his spine.

“I’m so hard, Jungkook. So hard because of you.”

Jungkook falters for just a second. For just one second he touches Taehyung and then realisation washes over him. How he is pressed against a car and touching the cock of the one man he swore to never touch again.

“Fuck off”, he spits and tries to push Taehyung away.

“What’s wrong? Did you realise how good I get you too?”

“No? I realised what I was doing.”

Taehyung turns his head, forcing Jungkook to tilt his head back in order to escape his lips.

“And what were you doing, Jungkook?” Taehyung rasps, pulling Jungkook’s hand back on his hard cock.

The moan slipping from his lips taunts Jungkook just as much as it turns his knees weak. He can’t lie anymore. Taehyung is messing with his mind. Talks about big cocks and getting fucked by them was all it took. And now that he is actually feeling just how big Taehyung already is, his skin is prickling in arousal.

“I, I”, he stutters, forgetting everything he wanted to say. What was he going to say anyway? He can’t think, not when Taehyung’s cock is straining so much against his slacks.

He dares to look down.

“Fuck”, he presses out.

“See that?” Taehyung says, squeezing his cock with Jungkook’s hand, “that’s not even close to what I can actually give you.”

“I, I don’t…I…”, Jungkook falters, feeling his knees wobble. He keens quietly, making Taehyung chuckle.

“Open the door Jungkook and get inside. Or leave and I won’t address it again. The choice is all yours.”

Jungkook hates that he follows Taehyung’s order without hesitation. He hates that he gives in so easily. He hates that just seconds later he is sitting on the backseat of the car while Taehyung climbs on top of his lap and forces his head to tilt up.

“I knew it”, Taehyung says and cups his face.

The kiss they share is rough. Taehyung controls the tempo even if Jungkook tries to take the lead. He fails miserably, having to give Taehyung the win despite his mind hating every second of the loss. Fuck, he thinks, I’m so weak, it’s pathetic. And yet he grabs for Taehyung’s hips and despite that, he begins opening his belt and later pants.

It is not long and both vampires are missing their pants. Jungkook’s gloves are on the floor as well. Next to his leather jacket and Taehyung’s suit jacket. Their shirts are messy on their torso, tugged to peculiar places from the desperate groping they did.

Taehyung grabs Jungkook’s cock and presses it against his own. He begins jerking them off, doing so fast and calculated.

Jungkook gasps, grabbing the edge of the seat. He never did something like this before, let alone had someone make him hard that way. Jungkook is rather proud that he wasn’t hard yet, but the pride is of short avail because Taehyung is doing an incredible job at getting him to the point of having to throb. Not long and Jungkook can feel how his cock is growing bigger and bigger.

“Ah”, he lets out, fighting the urge to close his eyes. The touch is so good. Taehyung’s cock is big and hard, rubbing against his frenulum each time his big hand is around their tips.

“You feel it, don’t you? Feels fucking incredible, doesn’t it?” Taehyung taunts, watching in delight how the younger vampire is writhing underneath him. Their cocks look incredible now that they are frotting. Taehyung is quite impressed actually. Jungkook’s cock is bigger than he thought it would be. His fingers are long enough however, that holding both their massive cocks is an easy task for Taehyung. He loves it, speeding up to the point that Jungkook arches his back.

“Oh Kook”, Taehyung moans, throwing his head back, “I know, it feels incredible.”

Jungkook can’t stop staring. It feels good and he hates that it does, because that means that Taehyung has enough power over him to get to him. He shouldn’t be hard, he shouldn’t thrust into his touch, he shouldn’t feel so charged in pleasure. He should punch in Taehyung’s face and call him a cunt. But he can’t. He can’t because Taehyung is touching him so good that he doesn’t want it to stop.

Taehyung, who is watching Jungkook stare at their cock with eagerness, has to smirk.

“It’s fascinating isn’t it?” he rasps, “look at it”, he says.

He stops his touches, holding their cock by their base to compare sizes.

Jungkook gulps.

He knows that he was way over average himself, but fucking hell, next to Taehyung’s cock he looks so small.

“What do you think? Isn’t it so big?” Taehyung taunts, rolling his hips so his cock would glide up and down Jungkook’s shaft.

“Shit”, Jungkook presses out under his breath, gripping Taehyung’s hips.

“Mhm, feels good doesn’t it?” Taehyung sighs and begins jerking them off again. Fast and sloppy.

Jungkook has to groan, but swallows it down as best as possible. Taehyung may have gotten him to the point of whipping his cock out, but he won’t break him further. He won’t make sounds for him, not for him.

“I must say”, Taehyung is struggling with his speech, “I’m impressed. Your cock’s marvellous too. I’m sure people love getting fucked by it.”

“Shut up”, Jungkook growls in anger, “you know exactly that I can’t fuck people.”

“Aw poor baby”, Taehyung feigns pity, “worry not Kook. That’s what I’m here for. I’ll fuck you so good, you won’t even miss a human touch.”

“No, you won’t.”

Taehyung growls deeply and in one swift movement he has the entire position flipped. Jungkook couldn’t even blink and he is already on top of Taehyung’s lap while the older vampire is holding him down with a strong grip.

“You don’t get it, do you? I can smell how into this you are, I know you want me. I know you are aching for it, don’t lie to me even now you’re clenching like a little slut.”

Jungkook stops what he was doing, frowning at Taehyung while his cheeks feel on fire.

“Don’t stop now Kookie, just because I called you out on it”, Taehyung taunts, embarrassing Jungkook oh so much that he feels his entire body shudder.

“You’re a cunt”, he spits.

“No, I’m not. I’m your fucking epiphany.”

Taehyung has such a big ego. Fuck. Jungkook is tensing in both anger and arousal.

Taehyung forces his fangs to the light of day, digging them into his own wrist deeply.

He rips himself open, watching in delight as Jungkook gulps in surprise.

Blood gushes everywhere. Dark red, bordering black. It covers Taehyung’s torso and parts of his thighs. But most of all it runs down his big cock, snaking along his throbbing veins and soaking his dark pubes.

Jungkook gulps again, squeaking when a second later he gets dragged on top of Taehyung’s lap by the older vampire. It is moments like these which remind Jungkook that he was only able to do the things he did to Taehyung because of the chains which held him back. Taehyung was ten times older than him and now that his strength has returned, Jungkook knows that Taehyung is hellbent on showing him.

“A-aahngn”, Jungkook gets out then silence takes control of his voice.

Taehyung is sitting him down on his cock. Slow and using the slip of his blood as lube.

“So fucking tight”, Taehyung growls, holding Jungkook’s hips tightly.

The latter is squirming, trying to fight him off. Not because it hurts, no Jungkook is stretching his hole too regularly for that, but because Taehyung decided it for him. He decided that this right here would be Jungkook’s moment where he is once again reminded that he will always be a pretty hole to fuck. Nothing more. Just a good, little hole useless unless it’s for taking cock.

“Don’t fight me, Kook”, Taehyung orders, pressing Jungkook’s hips down until he bottoms out.

Jungkook peels his eyes open only to widen them. He gasps for air and widens his eyes even more. He squirms, but Taehyung pins him down.

He quite literally pins him down. Jungkook is being held hostage while his ass is stuffed with the biggest cock he ever took.

“I said don’t fight me”, Taehyung rasps, “you little bitchboy are going to stay and take it.”

Jungkook squirms because those words are working. They are fucking working and he hates it. He hates it so much because it excites him so much to be treated with such little respect. He shouldn’t be excited to be treated like this by Taehyung. He should be angry at Taehyung, not feel ecstatic to get his cock.

Taehyung begins moving, having to struggle fairly little in doing so despite being on the bottom. Jungkook’s body is nothing but a little speck of dust in his hands. He feels no strain from holding him. Jungkook might be strong and his body might be muscular, but Taehyung sees no difference in it.

He is here to show Jungkook who will always be stronger, who has the upper hand, who controls the tempo and whose body is going to crumble at the end of the night. He fucks hard and he fucks loud.

Jungkook is supposed to hear how their bodies connect. He is supposed to hear how his hole gets fed bloodied cock. He is supposed to hear whose blood makes that fuck so fucking good.

Taehyung’s hard thrusts force his head to fall back and then kind of tangle weakly. It was also the moment Jungkook finds his voice again. He uses his new power to wail in bliss.

“Yes, scream for me slut. You little, slutty bitchboy are supposed to scream for me”, Taehyung growls, keeping Jungkook’s hips still. They want to fuck back, but they aren’t allowed to. They are supposed to stay still and accept the fuck Taehyung gives them.

And it is brutal. Fast. Punishing.

The car is shaking and croaking. It probably looks terribly amusing from outside, but inside there was no reason to laugh.

Inside the smell of Taehyung’s hot blood was in the air and the lingering scent of past death made both their heads dizzy. The adrenaline of killing is running through their veins. The bond of blood gets stronger the deeper Taehyung fucks his blood into Jungkook. They’re closer to animals than humans right now.

Jungkook arches his back, throwing his head back even more. His mouth is agape, giving view to his fangs being free.

Jungkook stopped hating it. This is religious. The scents, the feeling of Taehyung’s punishing grip and the size of his cock. That fucking cock. That big, girthy cock which stretches him out so well that it feels as if he is being shaped anew. This is it, Jungkook thinks as he trembles, this is the closest he will get to know how it would feel like to get fucked stupid by a fist.

It may be a confusing thought to some, but to Jungkook it makes perfect sense. He knows that once Taehyung stopped using his body as a ragdoll and pulled out, his hole will be gaping. He also knows how it feels to have a fist up his ass. Not the closed one because that feels even more intense, but the slick one. The one that slips in easily and which allows way to the smooth thickness of a forearm.

Taehyung’s cock makes Jungkook feel the same.

He knows that it is also because Taehyung just forced himself into Jungkook without preparation and decided that getting fucked roughly was the preparation Jungkook deserved. He wouldn’t feel that fucking thick if Jungkook had a few minutes of preparation beforehand.

Jungkook doesn’t mind. Big things up his ass don’t hurt these days. They just excite him.

And they make him feel like the biggest slut in history.

“You’re moaning so much”, Taehyung taunts, “you’re literally such a whore. Listen to you, you sound like a whore.”

Jungkook moans louder and nods his head. Yes he is a whore. He is nothing but a whore.

“I knew it. I knew you’re nothing but a fuckhole acting strong. Admit it Jungkook, the only reason you did what you did was because I was tied up.”

The clench Jungkook does around Taehyung’s cock is all the answer he needed.

“Of course, you know it too. You know that in any other situation, I would have had bend you over the next best surface and fucked you into obedience.”

Jungkook gurgles, arching his back in a sensual movement. He tries to fuck back, but Taehyung holds him down. Jungkook is truly nothing more than his sexdoll. And Jungkook loves that thought. He loves it too much.

Taehyung hooks his hand in the front of Jungkook’s shirt and rips it open. Jungkook’s torso is on full display and his secret of just how hard his nipples became from getting fucked is revealed.

“There we go, now you’re looking the part. Naked like a whore.”

He slaps Jungkook’s nipple as he speaks, grabbing his throat afterwards. With one harsh tug he forces Jungkook’s head to bounce to the front.

Jungkook gurgles out moans, fighting for air.

“Remember when you tried to do that to me, mhm?” Taehyung taunts, keeping an iron grip around his throat, “it told me everything I needed to know. It told me just how ill-fitted you are for taking the lead.”

Jungkook stares at Taehyung with half-lidded eyes and his lips parted in squeaky gasps.

“That’s how you steal someone’s breath, Kookie. So next time you want to act a role too big for you, play it right.”

Jungkook begins squirming. He is going to pass out. This is actually going to make him black out. Taehyung controls his air and there is none in his lungs.

Taehyung watches in delight as Jungkook’s cheeks become pink in too little oxygen and how his eyes become all big and glassy. He basks in how tight his hole becomes around his massive cock now that Jungkook is fighting him in panic. And he fucks him harder, showing off his long fangs in a maniac smirk all while his hand closes around Jungkook’s throat tighter, turning Jungkook’s voice into gags and squeaks.

“That’s how you do it, Kookie”, the taunts.

Jungkook squeaks, trembling in panic.

Taehyung releases Jungkook’s throat then, holding Jungkook’s hips because he knows the next few seconds will be bumpy. And he was right. Jungkook is squirming and shaking in his fight for air, clawing at Taehyung’s chest while his moans turn into coughs and gags. He rips his shirt open, but Taehyung doesn’t care. On the contrary, he is loving it.

“That’s how you do it Kookie. You’ll get them to believe that they’re about to die and only then you release them.”

Jungkook cries silently, “you’re, you’re so fucked up”, he croaks, holding onto Taehyung’s shoulders.

“I know and you’re a whore. So where’s the difference?” Taehyung taunts and picks up intensity. His cock is producing enough slick to make it possible.

“Hngn”, Jungkook presses out and drops his head, twisting his fingers in Taehyung’s hair while his forehead rests against his chest.

“Sit up”, Taehyung barks, tugging him up by his hair.

Slap.

Right across Jungkook’s face.

Slap.

And again. Hard enough to redden his skin.

Jungkook is squirming, gasping for air.

Slap.

“You’re supposed to look at me.”

Slap.

“Think you can get out of that easily? Of course not, you’re my fucking whore and I want my whores to look me into my eyes as I fuck them”, Taehyung growls, grabbing Jungkook’s face. He squeezes it, forces his cheeks to puff out and for his lips to pout.

Jungkook just looks kind of out of it, soiling Taehyung’s fingertips with his tears and sweat while barely keeping his head up right.

“I want to see your sweet little face light up in bliss when you realise that”, Taehyung tugs Jungkook closer, “I’m only fucking you like this because I deemed your ass worthy”, he whispers with poison in his voice.

Jungkook mewls, grasping for Taehyung’s face to kiss him.

One kiss. It is sloppy and more licking than anything. One kiss and then Taehyung tugs Jungkook away.

“Don’t kiss me”, he growls, shaking his head with a harsh grip on his hair. His hips speed up, forcing Jungkook’s body to tremble in not only bliss but also as a result of the intensity.

“Did I give you permission, mhm? Did I give you permission to put your slutty mouth on mine?” Taehyung asks, staring Jungkook right into his glassy eyes. He shakes Jungkook’s head for him, making the younger vampire mewl at the sensation, “no Sir, no you didn’t”, Taehyung speaks for Jungkook, mimicking his voice.

And Jungkook feels dumb. He feels so incredibly dumb. Not because Taehyung makes him feel that way. But because at this moment he can’t think. Holy fuck, he’s never been treated like such shit during a scene and it’s driving him so insane that he feels dumb in bliss.

“No, Jungkook?” Taehyung makes sure.

He shakes Jungkook’s head again.

“Mhm? What was that? Speak up.”

“No”, Jungkook croaks, “no Sir, you didn’t.”

Taehyung smirks darkly.

“And what are we saying now?”

Jungkook mewls and gurgles.

“I’m sorry Sir”, Taehyung mimics Jungkook’s voice again, grabbing the latter’s chin tightly.

“I’m…I’m sorry Sir”, Jungkook presses out.

“Good”, Taehyung praises and decides to push three of his fingers into Jungkook’s mouth.

With his eyes widening and his body convulsing, Jungkook accepts the feed. His eyes are focused on Taehyung’s, trying to find a reason but finding none. His instinct is to suck, but he gets very quickly denied when Taehyung begins fucking them in an out of him in time with his hips.

Jungkook’s eyes roll back and close. His big cock throbs, hitting his own stomach.

“See? That’s what you’re good for. Getting spit roasted like the good fuckdoll you are. That feels good doesn’t it, Kook? It feels good to know that your holes are getting fucked the way they deserve to be fucked.”

Jungkook can’t even deny it. He just makes dumb sounds and drools all over Taehyung’s fingers. It runs out of his mouth and down his chin, dripping onto Taehyung’s chest.

“I’ve always loved you guys. You Ripper just know how to make a mess of yourselves”, Taehyung rasps, watching in delight as Jungkook drools with his eyes all rolled back and his ass making the sluttiest of sounds. And all while Taehyung basks in Jungkook making a mess of his hand, his hips are drilling into him. More of his slick has joined his blood, making the slip oh so much easier. He also feels that Jungkook lost some of his tightness. He finds it beyond amusing just how easily the young vampire loosens up. A slut. Just as Taehyung thought. Jungkook is such a slut.

Taehyung slips his fingers free and holds them over his own mouth, letting Jungkook’s drool drip from his fingers right on top of his tongue.

Jungkook swears he has to drool even more at the view.

“Fuck”, Taehyung moans deliciously, curling his lips back in a drugged up smile, “I can taste the fucking acid.”

One swift movement and Taehyung has Jungkook’s face in a tight grasp, forcing his fingers into his mouth to tug his lips back and expose Jungkook’s massive fangs. Jungkook can’t fight it, just as he can’t fight his fangs squirting acid as Taehyung finds his glands and presses down hard.

It spills everywhere, golden and with fiery intensity in it. Taehyung’s chest is covered in it, as is Jungkook’s. It burns and Jungkook wonders if it burns Taehyung as well. He watches him with widened eyes and his nails trying to dig for support on Taehyung’s shoulders.

“I have always loved that you guys can do that”, Taehyung lulls and presses down again.

“Ahngn”, Jungkook feels his eyes roll back as the feeling of his fangs releasing the built-up acid courses through him. It feels so good. Jungkook’s head was pounding because of it and Taehyung helped him find relief.

“That feels good doesn’t it?” Taehyung taunts, massaging Jungkook’s gums, “I can imagine just how much pressure builds up in your head. To have so much acid but no fresh body to pump it into. It must feel like hell.”

Jungkook is rewriting his definition of Taehyung right this moment. He is fucked up. Way more fucked up and twisted than he ever thought he could be. And it turns him on. It makes him literally shake, because Taehyung gives him an opportunity to feel like the animal he is supposed to be.

Jungkook convulses, releasing the last wave of his acid all over Taehyung’s torso. He feels it on his cock as well. The burn digs deep, oh so deep that Jungkook has to open his eyes and wiggle in discomfort.

“There we go. That’s better”, Taehyung pretends to be caring, but his voice drips in mania. And Jungkook wonders if Taehyung is immune to the pain. His once ivory chest is covered in red burn marks and yet Taehyung shows no ounce of discomfort. On the contrary, his cock is filling up Jungkook with such grandiosity that he fears having to rip apart.

“Oh? Oh dear, it’s all over your cock”, Taehyung feigns concern, “that must burn.”

He wraps his spit slickened fingers around Jungkook’s throbbing cock and begins jerking him off.

“Aah!” Jungkook convulses, throwing his head back, “ah! Ah! Ah god!”

“I know it hurts. Don’t worry Kook, you’ll heal soon. Just a few more seconds, I know you can do it.”

Jungkook sobs, scratching down Taehyung’s burned chest. It fuels the latter. His hips punish him while his hand squeezes around Jungkook’s cock.

“A-ng-ah ngng ah, ah”, Jungkook gets out.

“There we go. Look at you. That’s better isn’t it?” Taehyung speaks softly, rolling his hand around Jungkook’s leaking tip.

“I’m c-cum-cumming”, the younger vampire squeezes out, convulsing around Taehyung’s thick cock.

“You are such a slut!” Taehyung exclaims and laughs, “you’re cumming? I don’t think so.”

He not only lets go of Jungkook’s cock but also lifts him off his lap.

Jungkook mewls, convulsing in Taehyung’s hands. He fucking breaks into a million tears. It hurts so much to be denied.

“Please”, he wails, writhing in Taehyung’s hands, “please, please, please.”

“Huh? Did you say something?” Taehyung taunts, shaking Jungkook’s nimble body.

“Please Sir”, Jungkook croaks, opening his eyes. He spills tears instantly with his lower lip trembling, “please Sir, please Sir, please Sir”, he chants, barely getting the words out.

Taehyung smiles in amusement.

“There we go“, he says, sitting him back down on his massive cock.

Jungkook stretches around him, taking him with a gurgled out moan.

“Thank you Sir”, he croaks and begins moving all on his own. It is clumsy and fast. This is a man so dumb by getting railed that his only instinct is to fuck, “thank you, holy fuck, thank you. Sir! Sir! Thank you Sir!”

“Fucking shit, Kook”, Taehyung twists Jungkook’s hair roughly, “you sound incredible like this”, he spits and finally lifts his hips to meet Jungkook’s rhythm.

It makes the younger vampire wail up and fall against Taehyung. He sobs miserably, barely fucking back because of how much he trembles.

“Weak bitch”, Taehyung spits, grabbing his hips to fully take over, “you can’t even fuck yourself properly.”

“Please”, Jungkook wails, “please, please, please.”

“Please what?”

“Cum. Please Sir”, Jungkook croaks and sobs, convulsing in a painful shake.

“Fuck, you slut. Fine. Cum for me”, Taehyung orders angrily, spanking his ass with so much force that the sound is almost deafening.

The scream Jungkook lets out as he finally cums overshadows it. Taehyung feels pain in his neck and he knows it is because Jungkook in his trance is digging his fangs into him. Jungkook shoots acid into his body, Taehyung feels the incredible pain rush through his veins. He laughs and tilts his head back.

“Yes, fuck”, he growls, letting the tight knot in his stomach burst.

Jungkook’s fangs dig deeper upon tasting Taehyung’s high in his blood, his entire body freezes up, becoming victim to Taehyung’s forceful thrusts while his hole is turned into nothing but his cum dump. And he feels sacrilegious, hoping that the feeling of being pumped full of hot cum never stops.

But it does stop. It stops once Taehyung fucked Jungkook’s overstimulated and creamed hole to the point where the trembling vampire is peeing himself because he possibly couldn’t cum any more. And then, only then he finally begins begging, clawing at Taehyung’s shoulders. Their bodies are ruined by Taehyung’s blood. Jungkook actually feels sick to the stomach from how much he drank. He can’t move because of his nature, but wants to.

“Please stop, no more, please”, he begs, gagging from being too stimulated.

“I thought you’d never beg”, Taehyung spits and drops Jungkook’s limb body, “fuck, you’re such a good fucktoy”, he praises, keeping Jungkook atop his recovering cock and hugging his waist against his stomach.

Jungkook falls, drops, collides. He can’t do anything against how hard he collapses against Taehyung. He is frozen up and weakened and can’t do anything except sit on Taehyung’s cock and think.

“That was incredible”, Taehyung rasps. He takes deep breaths, calming himself down that way.

And while Taehyung is basking in the afterglow, Jungkook feels empty. His brain is clearing and that means he has to face the reality. He gave himself in such a vulnerable, embarrassing state to the one man he swore to hate. He is so embarrassed. Now Taehyung knows how weak he is. Because Jungkook was so blinded by his animalistic needs, he exposed himself as a weak, little man. Taehyung will never take him seriously again. Jungkook decided his fate. He will be nothing more than a willing fuckhole for Taehyung from now on and that thought ruins him.

He is embarrassed, hates himself so much. He spills silent tears and wishes for time to turn back.

“Good boy”, Taehyung speaks softly, pulling Jungkook back to reality with a gentle touch to his back.

“W-what?”

“You were such a good boy. You took me so well.”

Jungkook lifts his head, staring at Taehyung in disbelief. What did he just call him? Good boy? Taehyung called him a good boy. No taunting words, but praise. Jungkook doesn’t understand. Why is he so nice to him? Jungkook doesn’t understand and he cries because of it.

“Now now, don’t cry”, Taehyung speaks in a soothing voice, cupping Jungkook’s face to wipe his tears away, “are you hurting? Should I pull out?”

Jungkook whimpers, squeezing his eyes shut with trembling lips.

“Okay, I will. Hold onto me, I’ll pull out”, Taehyung soothes him, lifting him off his cock. Jungkook cringes at how much cum spills out of him. This is it. The proof of what he did. He is marked as a dirty cum dump for all eternity.

“God, it’s everywhere”, Taehyung laughs, sitting Jungkook’s weak body atop his lap, “I apologise for orgasming so much. Gosh, you’ll leak for hours. I’m so sorry”, he says and giggles, pulling Jungkook in to kiss his cheek.

Jungkook flinches back, opening his eyes. He feels so confused. What is happening? Why is Taehyung not making fun of him?

“What is the matter?” Taehyung asks.

“Why are you not making fun of me?”

“Fun? For what?” Taehyung laughs in disbelief, furrowing his brows.

“For, for what I did.”

“Why should I? You were so good”, Taehyung says until suddenly his face lights up in realisation, “do you truly think me that cruel that I would make fun of you because of how much you enjoyed what we did?”

Jungkook feels too embarrassed to answer. Instead he spills silent tears and feels his lower lip begin to tremble.

“Wow”, Taehyung lets out an offended chuckle, “it hurts me that you truly think that lowly of me.”

Jungkook lowers his head.

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll just have to convince you”, Taehyung says and then pulls Jungkook against his chest in a soothing hug. He runs his fingers through his hair, drawing circles on his back.

“I know how you feel Jungkook. I had…someone…in my life not that long ago, who fucked me to put me back in my place and on many nights I felt so dirty and worthless afterwards while my spirit laid broken and in those moments I regretted ever consenting to what he did.”

Jungkook listens intently.

“And the worst part was that I still gave myself to him the next time he asked. Even if I knew how awful I would feel afterwards, I still gave myself to him the next evening and the next evening and the evening after that. And I let him fuck me until I was crying and then afterwards I laid still and regretted ever being so vocal or climaxing or enjoying it.”

Jungkook sees a lot of himself in Taehyung. He feels like that too right now. Just a little bit at least, because Taehyung’s hug keeps him safe from all those really painful thoughts.

“But I don’t want you to feel that way. You are not worthless”, Taehyung whispers, soothing through Jungkook’s hair, “and I don’t see you any less because of what you did. On the contrary, allowing another person to fuck you so roughly takes a lot of courage. I’m so impressed by you.”

Jungkook squeezes his eyes shut, exhaling so shakily that Taehyung tightens the hug.

“You got fucked too?�� Jungkook is quiet in the way he asks the question.

“Yes I did. I still do. Jungkook dear, there is no shame in getting fucked. Why are you even asking this question?”

“I don’t know, I just…” he exhales shakily, “…I don’t know.”

“Okay, I can see that you don’t want to tell me and that is fine. Just lean on me and I’ll hold you.”

Jungkook feels so tense. He knows that he should relax, but he can’t. Well, he could, but he doesn’t know if he finds it in himself to allow his body to relax.

“Why did you even fuck me if not to show me just how much weaker I am?” he asks in a whisper and for just a second he thinks that Taehyung didn’t even hear him. He feels relieved that he didn’t, until Taehyung inhales in a way that lets him know he will answer him. Jungkook begins feeling anxious then.

“Because I’m attracted to you”, Taehyung says, “and I wanted to fuck you the way you deserve to be fucked. Good and rough. And honest for once without you having to hold back on your feral side.”

Jungkook lifts his head, locking eyes with Taehyung. So that is why he pressed down on his acid glands and why he allowed him to bite so deep and feast on his blood until his tummy ached. Because he wanted Jungkook to be able to let go without control. Jungkook feels both grateful and scared.

“But all the stuff you said”, Jungkook whispers.

“Was because I listened in too many times to know that you get off on degradation. Come now Jungkook, do you truly think I feel that way about you?”

Jungkook nods his head.

“Well, I don’t. I think you to be quite sweet actually.”

“You do? Why?”

“Your eyes”, Taehyung whispers, running his thumb under Jungkook’s left eye softly, “they carry no evil in them. I could stare at them forever.”

Jungkook has to look away, lower his gaze.

Taehyung kisses his lips, making him gasp and flinch back.

Their eyes meet solely because Jungkook was so shocked that he needed to look at Taehyung.

“May I take you out?” Taehyung asks, “I’ll take you back to the hotel, we’ll clean up and then I’ll take you out.”

“Why?”

“Because I want to change your mind about me.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“So? We can change that over some coffee and conversation.”

Jungkook turns his head away, looking outside. It is raining. He didn’t even hear when it started. It is pouring down on the world, letting a wild stream of water run down the car windows. The edges of the windows were already fogged up, blurring out the world beyond the closed doors.

“It’s raining.”

Taehyung checks for himself.

“It is”, he says and chuckles, “I didn’t even hear when it started.”

Jungkook glances at Taehyung.

“Yeah, neither did I.”

Taehyung sneaks a look at Jungkook, locking eyes with him. He smiles, caressing Jungkook’s hips.

Jungkook wants to retort it, but doesn’t really dare.

“I always loved the rain”, Taehyung says, cupping Jungkook’s cheek, “especially in a car. The sound is so relaxing.”

Jungkook turns his head away, slipping out of Taehyung’s grasp.

“The others will look for us soon.”

“No they won’t. They are too busy.”

Jungkook sneaks a glance at Taehyung again.

“Come, let me take you out. I’ll pay and we’ll watch the rain somewhere.”

Jungkook lowers his eyes.

“Fuck”, he presses out, “fine, you won’t take no as an answer either way.”

And so it happens that Taehyung drives Jungkook back to the hotel with his hand on his thigh while Jungkook napped to recover from the fuck. And so it happens that the two men wash up and then later Taehyung drives Jungkook through town. They get cups of hot beverages. Jungkook gets coffee while Taehyung orders tea. And they get bagels too and after some driving around, they park the car by the river and watch the rain from the backseat.

Jungkook didn’t say a lot during that time, mostly because he felt too awkward to try. Taehyung looked at him a few times, but didn’t speak a lot either.

They sit on the backseat of the car by now, sharing their already cooled down drinks. Taehyung has his shoes off, resting his feet on the seat. Jungkook is pressed into the furthest corner, right against the door. He has his shoes on and stares outside with his head resting against the window.

He flinches when Taehyung stubs him with his foot.

One look to his left and he realises that Taehyung is staring.

“Why are you not talking?” he asks.

“Why aren’t you?”

“I have no idea, maybe I’m a little nervous”, Taehyung confesses and chuckles.

Jungkook furrows his brows in confusion.

“You still think me to be an evil cunt. I’m scared to start with the wrong thing.”

“Maybe start with an apology”, Jungkook murmurs.

“An apology?”

“Yeah. For all you did to me.”

“I didn’t do anything to you.”

“Yeah you did. You let them torture me and ___.”

“You know that I had no choice but to.”

“We always have a choice. You just chose the easier route.”

Taehyung stays silent. Jungkook sends him a dark look and turns away.

“Namjoon likes peeling off fingernails”, Taehyung breaks the silence.

Jungkook glances at him in confusion.

“He said that it is satisfying to watch the skin tear off the nail and that he especially likes the moment where he can pull out the root.”

Jungkook pulls a grimace of disgust.

“I know because he showed me how he does it the night they failed to kill ___.”

“What the fuck? What happened to the person? We have to make sure they’re okay.”

“He’s sitting in the car with you.”

Jungkook closes his mouth, gawking at him with widened eyes.

“He said that he likes doing it with me because of how quickly I heal, so he has infinite fun.”

“This is…”

“I didn’t choose the easier route, Jungkook. I chose the route which ripped me apart inside, but which assured my safety. You met Namjoon on a nice day, believe me. He could have done things far worse to you than just force feed you blood.”

Jungkook looks at his own lap. His thumbs have managed to rip parts of the cup. Just on the part where the plastic top meets the paper cup. The paper is curled and ripped in from all the fumbling he has been doing.

“I’m sorry”, Jungkook whispers, “I didn’t know that he treated you like this. I thought you were friends with him.”

“No, I wasn’t.”

Taehyung stubs his foot against Jungkook’s thigh again.

“I’m sorry too. I know that the right thing would have been to safe you and ___, but I didn’t. I didn’t because I was scared of Namjoon and, and Jim…” Taehyung looks into Jungkook’s eyes, “I truly regret that I couldn’t keep you safe.”

Jungkook wanted this apology for months. Oh how many nights he spent imagining how it must feel like to have Taehyung apologise to him. And now he finally has it. Jungkook can hear the honesty in Taehyung’s voice and smell the guilt in his scent. But it doesn’t feel as good as he thought it would feel. He imagined himself to bubble in triumph and to use the opportunity to gloat over Taehyung, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t want to gloat and he doesn’t feel as if he won some silly battle. He feels relief because he can finally look at Taehyung as an equal person and not as someone in front of whom he needed to put up a strong front.

“It’s okay”, he hears himself say, “we’re still here, aren’t we? You did what was best for yourself. I think I would have done the same if I knew that the consequences were Namjoon and his fucked up mind.”

“Are you truthful?” Taehyung gasps, “do you truly understand me?”

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Oh Jungkook”, Taehyung lets out a relieved laugh, stumbling to his knees. He closes the distance between him and Jungkook, placing his hand on Jungkook’s thigh.

Jungkook looks at it, then at Taehyung’s face. The touch feels warm and strong.

Taehyung carries tears in his eyes, but relief on his features.

“Thank you”, he says.

“Mhm”, Jungkook lets out, giving him a small tooth-less smile, “was Namjoon the someone who fucked you?”

“No, I never fucked him.”

“Who was it then?”

Taehyung looks at Jungkook with great sadness in his eyes. He lets out a painful laugh and looks the side.

“It doesn’t matter. I can’t see him anymore.”

“I’m happy for you. I’m sure that must have been a relief.”

Taehyung clasps his thigh so tightly, Jungkook wonders if he wanted it to crush it. He eyes his hand then Taehyung’s sadness stricken face.

“I don’t know”, he whispers, eyes racing between nothing.

Taehyung takes a deep breath and laughs, rubbing his hand over his eyes. Then he looks at Jungkook with a smile.

“Let’s not talk about this anymore. Shall we hold each other?”

“Huh?”

“Come”, Taehyung scoots closer to Jungkook, “let’s hold each other for a while.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. Just so.”

Jungkook eyes Taehyung with a cocked up brow.

“I don’t know”, Jungkook mumbles.

Taehyung’s smile grows. He reaches out for Jungkook.

“Please”, the word is so quiet in the silence that Jungkook almost missed it.

Jungkook studies the sad desperation deep in Taehyung’s eyes and he wonders if the request to be held carries far deeper meaning behind it than Taehyung may want to show.

“Fine”, Jungkook gives in. He leans down to undo his shoelaces and slips out of his shoes, then he pulls his feet on the seat, tensing up when Taehyung claims the emptiness between his legs and rests his cheek on his chest.

Jungkook watches with a clenched jaw as Taehyung closes his eyes and places his hand on his chest. He wonders why Taehyung is acting that way.

“Tell me something about you”, Taehyung says.

“I don’t know what I should tell.”

“Okay, then let me think of questions”, Taehyung says and for quite some time he is silent.

He traces Jungkook’s pec in the silence they share. He also touches his side and dares to dance his fingertips over his arm.

Jungkook lets it happen with so much confusion in his stomach. The touches feel nice. They are the type of innocent skinship he hasn’t felt in ages and it confuses him because it is Taehyung who gives it to him and he truly thought that he would be the last person to do such a thing.

“Do your tattoos have meaning?” Taehyung asks then.

“Yeah, some of them.”

“Did you get them before or after turning?”

“After.”

“So that means that you lost your arm, doesn’t it?”

Jungkook hesitates. There is still a part of him which is scared to admit that fact to Taehyung.

“Yes”, he whispers in the end.

“I see. I’m sorry, that must be really painful to live with.”

Jungkook feels tension in his chest upon being understood.

“I guess”, he says quietly.

“I understand. I’ll try to stay on your right side from now on.”

“Why?”

“So people can’t hurt you.”

“Oh.”

Taehyung glances at Jungkook.

“Tell me something else.”

“I don’t know what you want to know.”

“I’ll think of more questions”, Taehyung says and falls silent.

And as Taehyung thinks of what to ask, Jungkook tries to calm down his racing thoughts. Taehyung is going to look out for him now. He didn’t laugh at him like Jungkook thought he would, instead he is willing to keep his weak side protected. Jungkook feels deeply moved by the gesture. Moved, but also very confused.

“Did you always know you liked men too?” Taehyung asks then.

“Huh? That’s your question?”

Taehyung nods his head, looking up at Jungkook.

“I don’t…know? I don’t think I did. I was really happy with a woman before I became a vampire.”

“I see. I always knew”, Taehyung says, “as a matter of fact, I believed myself to be gay for the longest time until I had sex with a woman. Then I believed myself to be straight.”

“You did?”

He nods his head, “that was during a time where it was safer to sleep with women than it was with men. Not that they could have actually killed me, but you know, I was still scared because at this time I didn’t know if I would wake up again if somebody killed me and I didn’t want to die.”

“When did you die your first death?”

“I think it was 1343. A farmer killed me with a pitchfork because they saw me drinking their cow’s blood. I woke up buried in their dung heap a few hours later.”

Jungkook snorts.

“Don’t laugh. I had no idea what I was doing back then, I just tried to survive”, Taehyung says and chuckles.

“Really? I thought you had so many friends back then.”

“Not like me. Not vampires. I met my first vampire almost two hundred years later. His name was…” Taehyung’s face falls, his gaze becomes empty.

Jungkook studies the sadness in Taehyung’s eyes then watches as the latter rests back against his chest and squeezes his eyes shut.

“…I can’t remember”, Taehyung whispers. His fingers twist in his shirt, trying desperately to pull him closer.

“I died my first death in 1968 after I got high on LSD and then fell down the stairs. I broke my neck”, Jungkook says, hoping that it can cheer Taehyung up.

“Truly?” Taehyung asks, “you took drugs?”

“Too many. The sixties were a wild time for me.”

“Yes? Tell me, did you visit Woodstock too?”

Jungkook shakes his head, “I tried to avoid crowds of people for obvious reasons.”

“I see. I went and it was so much fun. Oh Jungkook, if we knew each other back then, I would have taken you. We could have had so much sex and danced and sang and gotten high.”

“You say that so easily. I wasn’t fun back then, just murderous.”

“That never bothered me. I can handle you guys.”

Jungkook scoffs.

“I am truthful. I was out of control for many decades and I taught myself control. I know exactly how you feel.”

“No you don’t. You’re a Normal.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does. You’ll never know how we feel.”

“Of course I do. Your body tenses up the moment you smell blood and there is this rational part in your brain, which keeps telling you, begging you, to stay in control. But no matter how much this voice is begging and pleading and crying for your control, you can’t give it to yourself. And then you black out. You black out because of how much pleasure you are feeling until suddenly it stops and you feel empty.”

Jungkook is holding his breath.

“You have all those bodies lying by your feet. All ripped apart and disfigured. And it hurts so much because you have no recollection of killing any of those poor souls and now you are left living with the knowledge that your demons won and you murdered too many people whilst fucking enjoying it.”

“Yeah”, Jungkook croaks.

“I know how you guys feel, Jungkook and I’m sorry that such a reaction is your default reaction. It must be so exhausting.”

“It’s so fucking exhausting”, Jungkook presses out, lowering his head.

“Hey”, Taehyung whispers, turning in the embrace so he could cup Jungkook’s cheek, “it’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. It’s so hard”, Jungkook whispers shakily, “I want to be like Yoongi or like you, but I’m not.”

“But you are on the path to.”

Jungkook sniffles, locking eyes with Taehyung.

Taehyung wipes away Jungkook’s tears, “it is a rocky road, long and exhausting, but you should turn and look at all the distance you already put between your beginning and your now. ___ told me that you couldn’t even stay in the same room as her when you first met and these days you can kiss her and hold her. Now tell me Jungkook, what about all of this isn’t progress?”

“I guess”, Jungkook lowers his gaze, “I guess, if you put it like that, I made some progress.”

“You did”, Taehyung says and smiles.

Jungkook retorts it this time around. Taehyung looks at his smile and for just a second Jungkook believes that he would kiss him. But he doesn’t, instead he rests back against Jungkook’s chest and begins caressing his side.

“So when did you realise that you were still into men?” Jungkook asks.

“Oh pretty soon after I died my first death. I couldn’t deny it, I loved sex with them too much”, Taehyung says and laughs.

Jungkook chuckles too.

“So what are you these days?” Jungkook asks.

Taehyung rolls to his back, pulling one of Jungkook’s arms around his waist. He intertwines his fingers with him and begins tracing his knuckles slowly.

“I don’t know. I couldn’t possibly define myself. Everyone is attractive to me, no matter what they identify as. I rather find myself drawn to personalities than certain genitalia.”

“Mhm, that’s good. That’s what truly counts in the end.”

“Yes, I agree”, Taehyung says and caresses Jungkook’s knuckles, “what do you define yourself as?”

“I just like nice people. I haven’t really thought about labelling myself. Maybe bi? Or pan? Or just queer? I don’t know though.”

“I see. Well, that’s good”, Taehyung says and shifts into a more comfortable position, “labels are way too constricting either way.”

“You think so?”

“Yes, I do. Labels aren’t for myself, they are for other people to put me into certain boxes”, he says, running his eyes over the rain outside, “people work this way. Things they can’t quite understand get easier to grasp once you put certain labels on them. Unknown food loses its intimidation once you know what it is, a stranger gets lets frightening once you realise you know this person and feelings get easier to understand once you know their origins. That is what is good about labels, but I don’t like them for myself.”

“You don’t?”

Taehyung shakes his head.

“I know myself better than anyone, I know what I enjoy and what I dislike. I don’t need to tell other people how they should label me. Because if I do, they will force their ideas on me, connect stereotypes with me and expect me to act according to the silly label they put on me. I can’t stand it when people tell me how I should be and how I should behave.”

Jungkook nods his head in agreement.

“I never even thought about it this way, but I get it. I really hate this feeling too. I had people tell me that I wasn’t a correct bisexual because I didn’t act the way they expected me to act. And I had vampires tell me that I wasn’t a true Ripper because I’m trying to better myself. Both really hurt me.”

“Those people were fools and had a very narrow mindset”, Taehyung says coldly, “I hope that you don’t have to interact with them anymore.”

“No, they’ve been out of my life for a long time.”

“Good. As they should.”

“Mhm yeah”, Jungkook agrees, watching the droplets of rain run down the window, “I think labels helped me too.”

Taehyung sneaks a curious glance at him, “yes?”

“Mhm yeah”, Jungkook nods his head, “I like defining myself as someone who is queer or someone who is a training Ripper. At least I don’t feel so alone knowing that there are so many people out there who feel the same way I do or who work on the same goals as me.”

“Yes, I must say that feels very nice indeed.”

“Mhm yeah.”

Taehyung sits up and nudges Jungkook’s chest.

“Now be honest. This is fun.”

Jungkook rolls his eyes, “fine, yeah maybe it’s fun.”

“See? I told you, I can be pretty nice.”

“Yeah, I guess you can”, Jungkook gives in.

At that Taehyung giggles, pulling his shoulders to his ears almost as if he was shy. Jungkook watches it with awed confusion. He must admit, he had such a wrong image of Taehyung in his head. He is kind and sweet and maybe even cute and Jungkook actually likes being in this car with him.

“Do you enjoy music?” Taehyung asks.

“Of course I do.”

“What kind of music do you enjoy?”

“All sorts of stuff. I like slower songs though. R&B is really good.”

“Mhm yes, it’s good. I agree. I really enjoy jazz, I think it to be so romantic.”

“Yeah, that’s true.”

Taehyung pulls out his phone then, scrolling through his music with sparkling eyes.

“Shall we put some music on?” he suggests, “we can listen to R&B if you want to.”

“Yeah we could. I have this playlist which I made. It’s really good.”

“Indeed? What’s its name? Is it public? Let’s play it.”

“Give me your phone.”

Taehyung hands it to him, using the time it takes Jungkook to find the playlist to turn on the bluetooth of the car radio.

The phone connects with a robotic female voice telling them about a successful connection.

“Here”, Jungkook hands the phone back to Taehyung, “that’s the playlist.”

“Starry Nights and Long Hugs”, Taehyung reads out loud. He smiles, meeting Jungkook’s shy gaze, “that’s a good name”, he says and presses play.

The music starts playing, filling the car with slow melodies and sweet lyrics. The two men just kind of look at each other for a while, being so close and yet so far away. Taehyung shifts, resting on his knees and placing his hands in front of him on the seat. Like this his hands are so close to Jungkook’s crotch. Jungkook fumbles with the empty cup of coffee, wondering what Taehyung may be thinking.

“Do you enjoy long hugs?” Taehyung asks him.

“Yeah, I do.”

“I enjoy them too, they comfort me quite a lot.”

“Yeah, I think so too.”

“I bet you can’t have them often, can you?”

Jungkook shakes his head, “they make me…”

“I know”, Taehyung interrupts him, “they make you want to murder the person. Well, at least your instincts kick in, I am sure that you don’t actually want to kill them.”

“Yeah”, Jungkook whispers, feeling flabbergasted once again just how accurately Taehyung gets him.

“Is it with everyone you meet or just humans?”

“No, just humans.”

“I see”, Taehyung nods his head, “shall I give you a long hug?” he offers with the sweetest innocence in his dark brown eyes.

Jungkook flusters, “no uhm…” he looks to the side, touching the side of his neck.

“I apologise. I’m way too pushy, please forgive me”, Taehyung says, putting distance between their bodies. He lies back against the car door, keeping his legs parted for comfort reasons, “I’m normally not like that, I don’t know what is wrong with me lately.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

Taehyung lets out a shy laugh, playing with the fluffy strands of hair at the back of his head.

“This is, uhm…” he begins, “…this is a good song, wouldn’t you say?”

“Yeah, it’s one of my favourite songs at the moment”, Jungkook answers him, but his brain is busy with something else.

Taehyung offered him a long hug. He hasn’t had a long hug in so long that he can’t even remember the last time he actually had it. He really wants to be hugged. He loves hugs. Especially long ones, warm ones, the kind which makes him happy to be alive.

“I can see why it is. The melody is very good”, Taehyung says, fumbling with his own hands, “do you make music?”

“Sometimes. It’s not good.”

“I’m sure that this isn’t true. How do you make music? Do you sing or play instruments?”

“I can sing”, Jungkook says and flusters.

“You can? I can sing as well”, Taehyung smiles shyly, “we must sing together one day.”

Jungkook looks at Taehyung, gnawing on his lower lip.

Ah fuck it, he thinks and gets on all fours to crawl to Taehyung. He plops down with his head turned to the side in embarrassment, falling into Taehyung’s chest with a soft huff of air.

“Oh?”

“Don’t say anything”, he mumbles.

“I won’t”, Taehyung says, draping his arms around Jungkook’s body. He buries his left hand in his hair, running his fingertips over Jungkook’s scalp slowly.

“Can you play instruments?” Taehyung asks him, having his eyes closed now that he is hugging Jungkook.

“Yoongi is teaching me how to play the guitar”, Jungkook answers him with his eyes closed in comfort. So that’s how it feels like. A long hug. That’s how it feels like.

“Oh, that is a good instrument. I am sure that you are very good at it already.”

“No, I’m not. It’s so hard.”

Taehyung chuckles, “indeed. I tried playing the guitar once, but gave up because it was way too difficult.”

Jungkook chuckles and Taehyung does too.

“Can you play something?” Jungkook asks Taehyung.

“Yes. The violin and the saxophone. I can also play the trumpet, but I am not very good at it. And at one point I was a very popular cembalo player.”

Jungkook has to laugh.

“Cembalo? Really?” he asks, looking up at Taehyung.

“Why are you laughing? Cembalos were very popular once upon a time. I was the most exciting person at parties”, Taehyung says with widened eyes.

“I’m sure you were”, Jungkook snickers.

Taehyung studies Jungkook’s features and slowly his face morphs into a fond smile before a warm laugh shakes his body. And Jungkook feels the need to laugh right with him, hands placed atop Taehyung’s chest and feet under the weight of his own butt.

Their laughter fades out in synch with the song fading into the next one. Taehyung’s eyes race between Jungkook’s. Jungkook’s do the same to Taehyung’s.

“I uhm”, Taehyung begins and sits up.

Like this, his legs are around Jungkook while the latter is kneeling right between them with his hands slipping down Taehyung’s torso as gravity pulls them down.

“Jungkook, I”, Taehyung whispers, placing his hands on Jungkook’s waist.

“Yeah?” Jungkook breathes.

“I really want to kiss you. Do you want the same?”

Jungkook exhales shakily, lowering his eyes. His hands finally come to stop on Taehyung’s lower tummy. It is bend in a little inwards slope because of the position the two vampires find themselves in. Jungkook traces the shape of it before his fingers naturally slip to his waist.

His eyes flit up, meeting Taehyung’s nervous gaze. He is holding his breath, not daring to move even if Jungkook’s gentle touch makes him shiver oh so much.

“I think”, Jungkook begins. His eyes flit to Taehyung’s lips. “I think I want the same”, he confesses and moves in.

Taehyung meets him halfway with his eyes already closed and a soft sigh slipping off his tongue. Their lips touch. Taehyung places his hand on the back of Jungkook’s neck instantly, fingers grasping him with such desperate emotion that Jungkook finds himself drawing closer to him if he wanted to or not.

He exhales shakily during a moment where their lips break apart, but neither of them decide to break the kiss any further. They fall into it again, wrapping their arms around the other until their chests melt into one and their hands bury themselves deep in the other’s hair.

A long hug and deep kisses. They won’t tell each other, but both know that this is all they needed tonight. They may both have different reasons, but they don’t mind because in this moment right here on the backseat of this car while outside the rain kisses the world, they were okay.

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gamebunny-advance · 2 months

Text

Let's Just Rip Off This Band-Aid (Kliff Doll Repaint)

I still haven't finished adding the fringe to his scarf, but at this point, I don't think y'all will actually care that much. It's a personal project anyway, so I'll just finish it on my own time. Right now, I want to be released from the shackles of this project.

Once again, my poor camera and lack of editing do him no favors (he's got a real bad case of jaundice in that first pic. I PROMISE he's not that yellow-orange IRL ;o;), but he is (mostly) done.

Well, he was (mostly) done like a week ago, but just yesterday I decided to redo a few things to try and "fix" what was really bothering me about him, so I really made recursive progress. That said, I do like him more now than I did a week ago, so I'm not mad about it.

A little backstory: Alongside Kun3h0, I've been working on him for the past month, so I've been pretty occupied with this project for a while. Now, I do wonder to myself why exactly I thought making this would be a good idea. All I can really say is that my impulsive tendencies drive me to do things against my better judgement.

But, I will still give y'all my documentation and thoughts on the process + more pictures.

(I'll talk a little more about it later, but for those of you that aren't going to go through the long-ass readmore, the Neon J. mask is a reference to an old comic I drew.)

(It's so old, I was still writing everything by hand~)

So, the "real" answer to "why" I made this is really as simple as "because I could." As I said in the Kun3h0 post, I've been wanting to repaint dolls for a long time, years even, so in the back of my mind, I'm always thinking of ways I could finally start one.

Well, recently I just finally put together the ideas and motivation I needed to start. And of course, that was with Kliff.

I don't remember *exactly* how I stumbled across everything, but I do recall looking at doll clothes online and stumbling across this trench coat (pictured with the other clothes for this project).

(I took this pic mostly because I thought I was going to take pics of every major step of the process, but that didn't end up happening).

I thought it was pretty darn close to Kliff's coat, and I got the horrible idea that, "I could def make a Kliff doll to go with this coat as long as I can repaint it."

I feel like usually people would think the other way around, but that is basically the truth of this project: I didn't find clothes to fit the doll, I made the doll to fit into the clothes. Because for me, customizing the doll wasn't really the intimidating part: it's making the clothes. I don't know how to use a sewing machine, and currently lack the patience to learn (and due to some personal trauma that I don't really want to get into), but I can hand-sew, so starting any project that involves it requires me to be willing to set aside a lot of energy for me to do it, which I don't often have.

But, if I could find ways to cut down on the sewing, then I'd be more willing to start. And somehow, I was able to find just about everything I would need for a potential Kliff doll without having to sew anything. In the end, I only sewed together one thing, and it's the one thing that isn't actually finished: the scarf.

So, I blame the trench coat for the entirety of this project: if I'd never seen it, I would have never made a Kliff doll. In fact, I got the clothes before I even had the doll.

Since I was brainstorming this project, one of the most important parts is of course the base doll, which was tricky. Male doll repaints are fairly uncommon, especially of older men, so there weren't a lot of resources or places to get inspiration for this project.

From what I found, most male (fashion) dolls were very youthful, and the ones that weren't usually took heavy modifications to achieve, which was out of the question. Kliff was supposed to be an "easy" project, so on top of not wanting to sew any clothes for him, I also didn't want to have to alter the doll that much to make it look like him. This was a lot to ask for without putting in any personal work, but in a way, this goal was supposed to keep me from actually starting this project: really this whole thing was supposed to just live in my head as a fantasy as most things do, but then I just stumbled into the right set of things, so I couldn't stop myself from going through with it.

The doll I landed on was a BTS Mattel doll. Now I've said before that I know basically nothing about BTS, and that is still true, but that's beside the point. In my research for finding a suitable doll to work with, I found out that a popular base were these BTS dolls. At first, I wasn't into it because I was still running into the "youthful face" problem that I was with other brands: most of them had pillowy lips and nice soft faces, but I did eventually find one that I thought was close enough: J-Hope.

(It's not the worst match up.)

I don't have pics of my doll before I started working on him, but it was pretty close to the stock photo. He has much thinner lips than the others, and a taller, more angular head shape that I thought would work best for Kliff. I did worry a bit that the nose wasn't "strong" enough to really be Kliff (and IMO, it wasn't XP), but it was the closest I found yet, so I decided to bite the bullet and get one, and if I had one, that meant I needed to start gathering everything I would need for this project.

So, no backing out now.

Now, actually acquiring this doll was a whole other song and dance, but here's the part that's important for how the process went:

Due to a miscommunication with the seller I eventually got him from, there was a delay with shipping, so I didn't actually get him until weeks after "officially" starting this project. In the meantime, the clothes and things for Kun3h0 (who I started as an impulse project within the impulse project) had already been gathered.

The original plan was that I was going to work on and subsequently post about Kliff first since he was a comparatively simpler project. All the things I was avoiding for Kliff: sewing clothes and making modifications to the doll, were all going to be incorporated into Kun3h0, so she was theorhetically going to take longer and be posted later, thus telling a small story of "starting simple, ending complex." But since I didn't have his doll, but didn't want to delay working on Kun3h0 just to wait on him, I started on her and repainting his clothes anyway.

So, I don't have any pics of the doll or his clothes from when I was working on them, unlike the sparse ones I had for Kun3h0, I only have pics from after he was finished.

But I'll still tell y'all what I can to at least preserve the story.

For starters, repainting this coat was probably the most time-consuming part of this process.

I really thought that it would take one or two days maximum to turn this coat bright yellow, but I think it actually took over a week. And I really should have known; the coat was a medium tone, and I know that yellow takes a while to build up on anything that isn't light. I lost count at some point, but I swear that thing has over 20 coats of paint on it. Mind you, the first 10 or so coats were watered down with the textile medium, which also contributed to how long it was taking for the coat to take color, but at some point I just got so frustrated that I stopped mixing in the medium and painting directly onto the coat to get the color to layer faster. This is a huge no-no for painting acrylics onto fabric, lest the paint crack from creasing the fabric, but I just couldn't be bothered anymore. I needed this thing to be dandelion yellow NOW or I was gonna lose it.

There were consequences for taking that shortcut, such as the paint cracking in high motion areas and the coat getting stiff, but it's not terrible. In the end, I accepted the trade-offs or else I might still be painting the coat. Perhaps one day I'll reverse engineer the pattern for the coat and make him a new one, but I wouldn't count on it. In retrospect, I wonder if I would have had an easier time if I had thought to bleach the coat first?

As you might notice, I contoured/shaded part of the coat in orange. That's something that I actually *just* added yesterday and added another couple of hours to the work time. It was just bothering me that the doll was essentially a giant slab of yellow, and was part of the reason I didn't like it very much. But I got inspired by this repaint to try contouring the coat to give it more depth.

youtube

(I also used this person's videos to modify the hands. He has one deidcated to just reshaping the BTS hands.)

In the end, I'm pretty happy with the results.

The rest of the clothes weren't as difficult to deal with.

The pants took the paint a lot better, likely due to being dark paint on a light surface. Since I used less paint, it's not as stiff as the coat and still go on very easily. Though, they are VERY high waisted, and I'm not sure if that's normal XP

The shoes are also painted (and slightly modified), though I had to paint them twice because the first time, the paint got stretched off when I tried to put them on the doll's feet: the shoes were just *slightly* too small for the feet of the doll, so they really get stretched to fit his feet, and his heels don't actually go in all the way XP.

He's still capable of standing on his own, but I try not to remove the shoes, so I can avoid having them crack again.

In my "initial clothes" pic, I put down a different shirt than the one he's wearing. The original plan was to repaint the shirt black, but my work space is very limited, so I couldn't really repaint three pieces of clothes at once without significantly risking that I would stain other things. In the end, after getting scarred by how long it was taking for the coat to take color, I decided to just give him one of the black shirts that came with the coat. This does make him somewhat inaccurate since the current shirt has flowers/plants on it, but I'm gonna say that they make up for the lack of flowers on his scarf. Maybe someday I'll make him a new shirt from an old sock or something, but for now, I don't think it's a bad look.

Other clothing of note is the scarf, but since it's not technically finished I didn't take any close pics of it. It's actually made of an old headband of mine that I just cut and painted to look like his scarf.

Originally, I had actually glued on ribbon to it for the stripes, which took a couple days for the drying, but because I couldn't flatten out the scarf to easily glue the ribbon, it turned into a mess and bulked it out too much: since the scale of the doll is already small, I really needed to keep the fabrics thin. This was especially important for the scarf since it was going to wrap around his neck: if it were any thicker, it was going to practically eat up his face, which it still does, just less so.

Speaking of face...

When I finally got the doll in the mail, I started working on him right away, so I don't have any "before" pics of the doll.

After I did the usual "wiping off the face and pulling out his hair," I started with repainting the entire body and head.

Despite Kliff being ambigously "WHITE 🫵," Kliff isn't as pale as the original doll. I'd say even the stock picture I posted above has more warmth than the actual doll did. So, I got the base to be "coral" all over, dusted him in light orange chalk pastels for contouring, and most of his details are outlined in shades of burgandy. I didn't take any nude pics of this doll, but he is countoured all over his body and you can rest easy knowing I gave him some nips XP. But maybe someday I'll show y'all doll!Kliff's washboard abs XP.

TBH, I did want to detail some tattoos and some body hair too, but I just didn't trust myself to do either of those well with the tools I have (my brushes aren't thin enough, and my hand not steady enough for those kind of intricate details). Maybe someday I'll at least get his tattoos in (and after I've actually designed them XP), but we'll see. I don't plan on having the doll in short sleeved clothes very often, so details like that are the least of my concerns.

TBH, I was pretty proud of how the face paint originally went on. I really took my time to make sure it went down flat. It really was beautifully smooth~

But disaster struck.

I had painted the head while it was still separated from the body, and when it finally came time to reunite them, the paint on the head cracked and peeled when I shoved it back on. And, foolish fool that I am, instead of accepting my losses and starting over from a perfectly clean head, I just peeled the lose ends and repainted the exposed parts, which of course made the paint uneven. I somewhat justified this with the idea that most of it would be covered by other details, but in retrospect, I really should have just started over properly.

But, after that ordeal was over with, it was time to actually work on the face.

I can't clearly remember if I worked on Kun3h0 or Kliff's face first. I think I worked on them simultaneously because it took me a LONG time to actually get the courage to work on Kun3h0's face.

I thought I did a decent job on Kun3h0 since I really only had the 1 eye to repaint (the hidden eye is painted, but it's basically just a void with no details), and it was a bigger "canvas", so it was easier to paint. Besides having 2 eyes that I would need to make nearly identical, they were also a lot smaller, so it took a lot longer to paint them in a way that satisfied me (and since it's not easy to "redo" acrylic paint, his eyes lost a lot of smoothness too).

Again, I don't have any "before" pics, so it won't be easy for me to convey my troubles about it, but I do want to say that I think Kliff with a closed mouth is very cursed.

He just looks like he's itching to say something heinous and that is no different for the doll.

It was so difficult for me both match his expression on a face that wasn't *completely* his and still look like him. Although I chose this doll because he most resembled Kliff, he was never gonna be a perfect likeness of him, but despite knowing this, it still bothered me that the face was still just very "young" looking.

Granted, I don't think the original Kliff looks *that* old either (if I didn't know any better, I would assume he was in his 30s, not his 50s, especially compared to other characters around the same age), but still not as *smooth* as the doll is (even with my paint mishaps).

If you can believe it, the face actually used be worse. I don't have pics of it, but like the coat, I actually repainted his face yesterday to again try and fix what was making me dislike it before. I think the problem is that I didn't outline the eyes as much as the final one (like, I don't think I lined his undereye at all), so he was lacking depth. The mouth was also a little more off. Instead of being like "<--->" it was more like "|-|"

(A rough illustration of what I'm trying to describe.)

So, while it's still not perfect, I do like him more today than I did a week ago.

I think the only things left to talk about are his accessories, starting with his wig:

I'm not actually a big fan of the color. When I started this project, I wanted to try and make him as accurate as possible, and the original Kliff design has a very "cherry jolly rancher" hair color.

However, how I draw him and how he appears in Encore Edition gives his hair a more red-orange tone which isn't as intense. In the end, I opted for accuracy towards his first design since that's the one I was technically most familiar with and wanted to replicate, but in retrospect, I should have realized that I was never gonna be able to seperate my personal quirks from this personal project, so I should have gone with a color that was more accurate to how I interpret him. (I dunno if I would have gone as far as to give him triangular eyes, but one of my biggest takeaways from this project has been that I should have just allowed this to be "my take" on the character instead of trying to be "accurate," meeting in the middle, and satisfying neither condition.)

I don't think I really got across how much I HATED brushing out yarn for the wigs when I posted Kun3h0. It was just such a tedidus process, from brushing it out, to straightening it, to gluing it down. It was such a mess. I'm still finding loose wisps of yarn hair floating around my home since I made them.

Since I had more than had my fill from making Kun3h0's wig, I once again started taking shortcuts when it came to Kliff: I really should have made more wefts for him. I figured since his hair was (compartively) shorter, that I wouldn't need to make as many, but in the end his wig turned out both too thin and too thick.

Since his hair is so messy, I didn't follow any kind of guide for his hair like I did Kun3h0. I basically just glued around the perimeter of the cap, horizontally on the inside, and made sure it would fold over in the front.

Part of the problem is that I made the wefts too thick: instead of just gluing down what could actually touch the surface of the work area, I wound up gluing layers on top of each other, so the wefts would be like a mm thick when they should have been less than half of that. So, I barely got enough coverage for the scalp, and the parts that I did get down are very thick. I think it makes his head look bigger than it should which kinda adds to the uncanniness of him.

I did try to style it as close to canon as possible, but there are some things that just aren't (easily) possible in certain mediums, and Kliff's wild hair is one of them.

In retrospect, I probably should have just sculpted his hair with clay or something: it probably would have been more accurate, but I don't have much confidence in my sculpting ability, and again, I didn't want to modify the doll that much, so I stuck with the yarn.

I might suck it up and try and make him a new wig, I still have a LOT of red yarn left over, so maybe I can make him some new styles too. But the tedium of going through with it makes it very unlikely that I'll follow through~

(The wig from other angles.)

Since the beard is made from the same yarn, I'll lightly talk about that. There aren't too many resources about bearded dolls, but I've seen people root it, glue it, and even just paint it if they weren't supposed to be thick. In the end I used this repaint for reference (suggestive content warning) and glued it on.

youtube

The scarf covers most of it, but I think it turned out okay. I need to add just a *little* more to his left cheek, but otherwise I feel like I was successful.

Next, it's usually hidden due to all the crap that's on his head, but I did give him an earring.

I didn't think about it until way too late in the process, and I tried to poke a hole through his ear so he could actually wear it. However, when I tried to do so, I almost ruined his head paint a second time. Saying, "fuck that," I decided to just glue it on.

If I had been more brave with modifying this doll, I might have just resculpted his ears entirely, because, being based on a real life human being, the doll's ears don't flare out that much, so they're easily covered by other things.

His glasses are just a piece of painted plastic that hold to his face using some plastic cord. They fit well while his wig is off, but putting them on with everything else is a goddamn nightmare.

Since his ears are so small, and his hair is so short, there's nothing for the glasses to "grab" onto without the cord, but the cord is too short to fit around the wig once it's on, but I can't make the cord longer to sit over the wig, because the glasses need to go over the headband, and it's a pain in the ass trying to layer everything like that.

So, I have to put the glasses in place first, TAPE the cord to his scalp so they don't move, put on the wig, then put on the headband. It's really such a hassle, but I don't think I can truly convey the annoyance of having to do it all without showing you. So, unless I absolutely have to, I'm never taking any of those things off him again.

I think the last things are the headband, mask, and tablet.

The headband is just a spare scrunchy that I have. I don't have one in the *exact* same color as the real one, so I went with the closest one I had, which was this teal color.

I didn't feel comfortable repainting one since it's essentially an elastic band, I don't think the paint, even with the textitle medium, would be able to hold up to all the stretching I have to do to even get it on his head.

If I happen to find a white one somewhere in my stash, then I might try dyeing it using water and acrylic paints to see if I can get it green, but for now, I think this works. A little thick, but it works.

The tablet is just a piece of foam painted with paint markers and the mask is a piece of cardboard. I wasn't planning on really recreating any scenes with this doll, but since I remembered that comic, and thought it would be easy enough to make, I went ahead and made it as an in-joke to myself.

Honestly, I think it's the most charming piece of the entire ensemble. Plus, he can wear it without me having undo/redo any of his other head accessories, so it's easy to make him wear it whenever.

My final comments about the doll itself are that he's fucking huge. I should have taken a pic of him next to Kun3h0, but he is too tall to even fit on my display shelf without sitting.

(Please ignore any mess you might see in the reflection. This is just one of the only flat pieces of furniture he can stand on without me standing on something to take a pic.)

Despite my interests, I don't actually collect dolls (I'm more into figures and plushies), so I wasn't expecting him to be so big. In fact, Kun3h0, who would be considered a small to medium doll in collector's spaces, was also bigger than I thought she'd be, so you can imagine my surprise when I got my hands on him.

So... I don't really know where I can put him. He obviously can't live in front of my TV, but beyond being too big for my shelf, he also doesn't fit in with any of my other collectibles. And I'll be honest, the contrast of him "clearly not belonging" among my more "kawaii" items was a motivator in starting this project, I live for the gap moe after all, but in practice he really just sticks out like a sore thumb. (This is also why his first pics are in a slightly different location without many props. I just couldn't put together anything from my collection or find a spot among my things to take a good thematic pic with. The magazines/CDs he's with are from my dad's collection.)

I do have space at higher elevations in my room, but it's kinda off putting to have him staring down my room, looking like he's plotting something (my space is too small to ignore it). So I dunno what I'm gonna do with him. I did have plans to make him some... cuter outfits so he wouldn't stick out as much, but that requires sewing, and I'm kinda worn out from this project.

In conclusion, despite my troubles with this project, I'm not entirely displeased with the results. At the very least, it was an experience, and one that I might even be willing to do a third time 👀...?

But for now, I'd like to rest and maybe go back to drawing again. I feel like I haven't drawn anything "real" for a while now. We're inching closer and closer to the next follower milestone (4 digit number BA-BY!), so I'd like to at least get back to being good enough to sketch some stuff for y'all soon~

#gbunny makes #gbunny draws #custom doll #doll custom #doll repaint #kliff #nsr #no straight roads #for the record i do find this project thoroughly embarrassing for me #but i can't justify its existence without sharing it. so here it is.#like. i wish i could have been obsessed with somebody else.#anybody else.#well. someone who's socially acceptable to obsess over i guess #but i'm not. i'm obsessed with him so i'm going to make things of him #and they're gonna make me happy #despite the embarrassment #Youtube

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