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#lyrics make me cringe and laugh so fucking hard
ghosts-and-glory · 20 days
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absolutely no judgment here (hello fellow ex-undertale au girly) but some of your art makes me feel like you know what fatal error is
I HAD TO GOOGLE THAT ONE, I WAS NOT THAT DEEP IN, I SWEAR TO GOD I WAS NOT THAT DEEP.
The fact that y’all can see the Undertale in my art is so fucking funny. I will never be free. However, I like to tell myself you can’t see the hamilton phase.
Anyway y’all want really old Undertale art? I have a rule with myself that no matter how much physic damage it causes I hold onto all of my art and writing. My pile of art drawn on loose printer paper.
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Ye olde art under the cut.
Luckily one thing had a date in it so all this is from approximately 2017. I also have a vague memory of tracing some Undertale stuff, I’m 99% sure none of the art I grabbed is traced but if anyone happens to recognize something let me know so I can credit the actual artist lmao.
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“I’m sorry is that Set it Off lyrics on a sans Undertale drawing?” Yes, it was 2017 and I was 13, do you expect better? And the amount of comics is just proof that you never truly change.
That last comic was labeled as “UnderEdge” and I laughed so fucking hard at that. Who let me do that??? WHO LET ME DO THAT??!!?!!?
I would also love to bring to y’all’s attention the fact that these have sticky tack on them. I had this hung up on my wall for my parents to see. Shout out to my parents for letting me be cringe. Deadass I remember my dad giving me positive feedback on some of this stuff and that I’d draw Flowey a lot for him.
I have a lot more, the rest of the pile is mostly wolves and Star Wars stuff. I am cringe, but I am free.
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peepslibrary · 21 days
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Introducing~ Lay Bankz
This is probably one of the funniest things I've ever written. I guess this qualifies as a song fic? If you've been on tiktok a couple months ago, you'd probably recognize this song.
Synopsis: What would happen if the LU boys heard the song Ick?
Warnings: Explicit lyrics, mentions of sex
Y'all can thank @trippygalaxy for this.
... Why is there a portal right outside the camp?
Why is there
a
PORTAL-
You're fairly confident the whole town heard your sigh and the chain's groans as y'all packed everything up and linked hands to go through the stupid portal. The other side of the portal was - in fact - NOT another Hyrule. It was a stadium. A stadium filled to the brim with people, a gigantic stage, and multicolored lights moving all around. Ok wait- the portal might've been the least of your problems.
The group looks around with emotions varying from confused to overstimulated. Honestly, if you squint you could see their braincells work together. You turn around, doing a quick headcount. “Wait, where’s Wind?” You count again and… nope still 9 including you. Fuck
I don't mean to judge off a first impression. Or his part-time job at 7/11. But he's a broke-ass peasant ask-
You feel your eyebrows furrow. Where do you know this song??
(ick) and he's got bad credit (ick) and he got a foot fetish (ick) DNR, but he tryin' paramedic
Shit... that's where you recognize this from. Tiktok
You're quick to move and cover Sky’s ears, making a silent prayer to whatever poor soul is listening. You need to get everyone out. You guys need to find Wind and you're fairly confident that everyone present will get red in the face when they register the lyrics.
"Time." Thankfully he managed to hear you despite the current situation. You see him angle his head up for a milisecond. Just subtle enough for you to reply with a tilt of your head towards an emergency exit. He doesn't hesitate to nod, moving to Wars and Twilight to help move everyone along. It's not a stretch to think that he's overstimulated with the environment. Has any of them ever heard this much noise so close?? You wouldn't wish that on your worst enemy.
Actually... Dink can kiss your ass. He's literally the one that pulled you into this craziness in your pjs. Like... dude coulda waited until you were decent t-
“Hey, what’s going on?” You curse and look up at the question-er. His eyes stuck looking at the ground, his ears lowered under your hands while his playing with the fabric of his sailcloth. “Sky I’m trying to get you guys out of-“
(Ew) Lady boner gone (Oh no), He dry humpin' me and huffin' like a dog (Hah, hah), And he whispered in my ear did I get off?
You didn’t think it was possible to cringe laugh *this* hard. But oh boy, the collective faces made shouldn’t have been that funny. Red in the face and trying to move everyone faster - incredibly hard considering they’re all standing like statues - are Time, Wars, Legend, and Twilight. Sky, Wild, Four, and Hyrule have moved to cover their own ears, with some crouched against the floor.
Somehow everyone is able to leave the stadium with only their innocence (or lack of thereof) injured, only to find Wind standing with a security guard eating a string cheese and a can of soda next to him.
“There you guys- what happened?” Wind makes his way to y’all and you use that chance to check for visible injuries, making sure no one injured him.
“Although it’s likely they would be the one injured.” Your brain supplied helpfully.
“Uhh…” you look at the group’s states, “let’s just say they weren’t expecting what was inside the stadium.” Wind nods in understanding, “Yeah, Sam wouldn’t let me in because it was ‘for adults.’” You spare a glance towards the guard, who gives a humored nod and sends you guys on your way.
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thebottomfromhell · 6 months
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hi I absolutely love your writing!!! may I request the upper moons walking in/hearing reader singing a love song that they're so sure is about them, along with their reactions?
not necessary to add, but it'd be funny if reader had that song playing in their head over and over due to how in love they are while in the middle of a meeting with muzan and him going "what the fuck, who is this for, you're pathetic"
thank you so much for your time!
My brain after reading this ask in bethesda game quest format: *skyrim quest initiation drums* Find a song that at least have love included that represents the Uppermoons.
I loved this concept, call me cringe or whatever but if you have never liked a musical song (movie songs included, don't you go on denial. If you liked disney the stfu) or appreciate a good Opera (the LUNGS these people have, try singing in a threater loud enough for everyone to hear you without a mic, I dare you), then you're missing something.
I'm very sorry for the wait, I hope you like this one too. Thank you for the request too, it's something different and I had fun with it.
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Uppermoons and GN reader confessing over a song (Musical AU with modern music and spotify/music youtube)
Songs used: [vid with lyrics + translation if needed]
Gyutaro - Your love is my drug (Kesha)
Gyokko - Prisoner (Jeffree Star)
Sekido - Dark red (Steve Lacy)
Karaku - Perro fiel (Shakira ft. Nicky Jam)
Urogi - Balada (Gusttavo Lima)
Aizetsu - Name of love (Bebe Rexha and Martin Garrix)
Nakime - Boyfriend (Dove Cameron)
Akaza - Love story (Indila)
Douma - Shut up and listen (Nicholas Bonnin)
Kokushibou - Tsuki no curse (Reika Okina)
Warnings: My broken taste in music, sexual content mentioned (in song), sexual content implied, slight drug use mentioned (in song), Akaza sings in french and slight angst, yandere behavior (in song),
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Gyutaro:
"Maybe I need some rehab. Or maybe just need some sleep. I got a sick obsession. I'm seein' it in my dreams." Holy SHIT you listen Kesha? He listens Kesha too! His sister was the one to introduce him to the artist and, he admits, the songs are very catchy. "What you got, boy, is hard to find! I think about all the time.I'm all strung out, my heart is fried. I just can't get you off my mind" "Your love is my drug" is not really his favorite from her, "blah blah blah" and "cannibal" take that prize by far (no, it's not because it's fun to sing as if he was high, he doesn't sing... at all... no, Daki, he just said he would not-)
"Because your love, your love! Your love is my drug! Your love, your love, your love!" Fuck. He really didn't mean to, he just... did it. You look at him surprised, you didn't even know he was around. Still you laugh a bit with him as he keeps singing as he forces you into his shoulder and back like he does with Daki. "I said your love, your love, your love is my drug! Your love, your love, your love!" He moves slightly, careful not to drop you, he just looks so active and joyful.
You are addicted to this side of him to, this one it barely shows, that side of him that is actually fun to be with, chaotic and messy the same way he is intimate and caring. This is your guy. "But left to my own devices I'm addicted, it's a crisis. My friends think I've gone crazy." He interrupts again. "OH! I like this part! My judgment's getting kinda hazy. My steeze is gonna be affected if I keep it up like a lovesick crackhead." You let him keep singing, until it gets to a part that is important to you, in ehich you get off Gyutaro to cup his face in your hands, making eye contact.
"I don't care what people say. The rush is worth the price I pay. I get so high when you're with me. But crash and crave you when you leave." There, you got it, you see his eyes glow a little as he keeps looking at you, face blushing. He gets it. He always gets it, even when he doesn't want to. "Wow. Ne, just... wow. This song is perfect for you, y'know?" You chuckle a little at that. "How about you? Do you also feel like that?" He looks at the other side a bit embarrased before nodding. "I do, ne. The song is good. Really good." Maybe that is why you spend the rest of the night singing it, along with other songs from Kesha. It was lovely (Also, he nails it at blah blah blah), you wilk repite it again.
Gyokko:
"I got no regrets. And I remember the day that we met. There was no way that I could forget you.So I followed you home. And I waited 'til you were alone." Ok, Gyokko doesn't even own a home, staying at the house of his victims for a week or so doesn't count, even if you have followed him to one or two of them. He was the one to invite you, the behaviors of this song is not yours. If it had to be someone's, it would be Gyokko's. "And I know this seems so wrong. But I'm just a lovesick criminal."
"Oh! I knew you had good taste, but this is amazing!" You never stfu faster than that, closing your mouth the second you heard Gyokko's voice. You turn around and he seems... cheerful. "You can arrest me, baby, I don't wanna leave. Lock me up, throw away the key. I don't care if I'm in trouble deep. I'm addicted to your love." He keeps singing it, moving with the beat. You knew the song was his taste, but you didn't expect this outcome. "I love that song. One of my favorites. And the fact that you love it too! It's magnificent!" Still, if he is aware of the main reason you like the song, he doesn't let it show.
"I'll be your prisoner. I'll be your prisoner tonight." You keep goin, not knowing if it's to pretend nothing happened or if you are just vibing with it, but you both keep going. "I, I, I, I'm under your spell. And I just can't get enough!" You don't talk about it until you finish the song, but... you will, you can sense it. But you can also see Gyokko smiling, enjoying the time with you. "I'm prepared for all the consequences." "Believe me, I have the worst intentions." "I'm prepared for all the consequences! Believe me, believe me!"
You will be fine.
Sekido:
Sekido is NOT going to apologize, he never even thought about it. Sure, he was rude to you and maybe crossed a line or two, but you made him angry first. You also crossed the line this time! He doesn't even remember what you said to each other, but he remember it was bad. Why would he apologize if he is wondering if he even should forgive you. "Something bad is 'bout to happen to me. I don't know it, but I feel it coming. Might be so sad, might leave my nose running. I just hope she don't wanna leave me." He stopped when he heard your voice.
Sekido was never the one to plead, he was never the one to even ask for things. He is by far the most prideful of the clones. But if you were actually to go, to leave- "Don't you give me up, please don't give up. Honey, I belong with you, and only you, baby. Only you, my girl, only you, babe. Only you, darling, only you, babe. Only you, my girl, only you, babe. Only you, darling, only you." Wouldn't he beg like this, so pitiful and needy, because even if he doesn't want to admit it... he loves you. "Y/N."
He interrupts you, making you just realize he is there. "Is this... how you feel. Or am I reading this wrong?" He gets close slowly, but you can't really answer. You also don't want to be the one to apologize first, to admit you need him as much as he needs you without knowing what he is feeling. After some seconds of silence Sekido looks away and starts singing what you just sand, but more like a murmur, if the lips separated less then it would onlu be a hum. "Don't you give me up, please don't give up. Honey, I belong with you, and only you, baby." It sounds sincere. It is.
None of you apologizes, you both just keep... singing and huming. Just staying together, not wanting to leave. At all.
Karaku:
"C'mon, what were you humming, hot-stuff? I heard you just now. I promise not to laugh even if it's a lame virging song." He is teasing you. Of course he is, but he won't leave you alone until you obey. "How about you sing it? Since the song is clearly stuck in your head." How did he actually convince you? Only Karaku knows, but in the end you do as he says. Maybe you wanted this, to take it out of your chest. He has no way you actually think about him everytime you hum this song. Is like conffesing without actually doing so. "Aquí estás. Ya no puedes detenerte. ¿Dónde vas? Si estoy loco por tenerte." He seems to recognize the song, raising an eyebrow while smirking. "¿Cómo lo iba a saber? Que te vería otra vez. Tú me confundes no sé qué hacer...." You stop.
This is embarrasing, you better leav- "Yo lo que quiero es pasarla bien. Yo tengo miedo de que me guste, y me haga enloquecer. Si eso pasa yo seguiré. Contigo aquí como un perro fiel." Oh.... oh. He likes the song, and you don't know why, but that alone raises your confidence. Specially when he grabs your hand to make you spin around, as if dancing, laughing cheerfuly and loudly when you follow the lead. "Yo tengo miedo de que me guste, y me haga enloquecer." "Like that! Keep it up." You do, sometimes he moves as if to dance, mostly keeping himself roamimg around you, interrupting to sing himself or cheer up at times.
"Dicen que tú eres peligrosa. No le hago caso a esas cosas. Dime qué está pasando. Me tienes como un loco, soy un loco enamorado, eh." "Crazy man in love", that parts come from your heart, because you are in love. He puts one hand behind your head and the other in your waist before going the next part. "Quiero saber cuánto me vas a insistir. Y hasta dónde llegarías por mí. Siento mucho la espera. Pero valdrá la pena cuando te esté besando." "When I kiss you", and he just finishes the verse by doing so. And damn if it isn't worth every damn second of yearning. He speaks again after pulling apart, only inches away from your face. "Best love confession ever, hot-stuff. Very nice to use a "romantic" language. Keep coming for me and I'll keep you as mine, got it?"
What else were you meant to do but nod? Damn, you don't have to be a genius to know where the night is going. And you are going to like it.
Urogi:
For context... You were singing, only to stop when Urogi appeared from the sky. Now he has been following you "C'mon, sing again. PLISS? I like that song, I promise. I just want to hear you sing it." It took less than an hour of whining and puppy-eyes to convince you.
"Eu já lavei o meu carro, regulei o som. Já 'tá tudo preparado, vem que o brega é bom. Menina fica a vontade, entre e faça a festa. Me liga mais tarde, vou adorar, vamos nessa" And Urogi interrupts, to your surprise, singing the next part as he flies around you, grabbing your hands in his, exagerating movements as if dancing. "Gata, me liga, mais tarde tem balada! Quero curtir com você na madrugada! Dançar, pular até o Sol raiar! C'MON, IT'S YOUR TURN Y/N!" You follow the song and repear that same fragment before Urogi steals the next part again.
"O tchê tcherere tchê tchê! Tcherere tchê tchê! Tchê, tchê, tchê!" The song barely says anything at all. It's barely has content, but... it fits Urogi. It's more a thing of vibe than of actual words. "Se você me olhar vou querer te pegar. E depois namorar, curtição. Que hoje vai rolar." Really, it's simple, the song could be sintesized in a "let's party and if I catch your eye let's stay together the whole night", but it's cheerful, full of joy, very light... very Urogi. Maybe that is why you like it.
You are unsure if Urogi gets what you are really feeling, but he gets completely the song. And he does want to stay with you and have fun the whole night. It's a win. You will be able to explain things to him later, but for now. "Gusttavo Lima!"
Aizetsu:
"If I told you this was only gonna hurt. If I warned you that the fire's gonna burn. Would you walk in? Would you let me do it first? Do it all in the name of love?" Just after you finish that part you feel a hand on your shoulder, you turn around to see Aizetsu. You blush at the realization he found you singing, though he is blushing too. "Would you mind if I sing with you?" He doesn't explain himself futher as he asks shyly, you can only nod as he takes a breath to continue the song.
"Would you let me lead you even when you're blind? In the darkness, in the middle of the night. In the silence, when there's no one by your side." He looks at you as if waiting you to join, smiling softly as he offers his hand. "Would you call in the name of love?" You take it. "In the name of love, name of love. In the name of love, name of love. In the name of." You basically also hum together the instrumental, in a softer version. You spare glances on each other, deep and adoring.
"When there's madness, when there's poison in your head." It's almost as if you were actually talking. "When the sadness leaves you broken in your bed." You sure get that Aizetsu means it. Every word of it, that is why he wanted to sing with you. "I will hold you in the depths of your despair." "And it's all in the name of love" And so. "I wanna testify." "Scream in the holy light." "You bring me back to life." And it's all in the name of love. That you look at each other, hold your hands, talk. Because you do talk once you both finish.
"I love you a lot. Do you.. it would make me sad if you were not singing for me like I was singing for you.... but I would unders-" you must interrupt him "I was singing for you too." He smiles softly at you. "Can.... can I kiss you? Please?" No, because you kiss him first. What a lovely song, lovely night, and lovely romance.
Nakime:
"I could be a better boyfriend than him, I could do the shit that he never did. Up all night, I won't quit." Not the type of melody Nakime is used to, the opposite, but it's a nice song. "Thinking I'm gonna steal you from him. I could be such a gentleman." You sing with the most care, because you know she is watching, she is hearing, even if you can't see her. This is her castle, after all.
You know what you are doing, the message that you are giving. Nakime loves music, what better way to confess than with a song. And this is a song which just... vibes with her. You have no idea if she has ever heard it before, but it seems it doesn't matter. "I don't need to tell you twice. All the ways he can't suffice. If I could give you some advice. I would leave with me tonight." It doesn't, because she is talented in her art. So she plays the biwa, making a beat for you to follow. "The universe must have divined this, mmm, mmm. Ladies first, baby, I insist."
"I could be a better boyfriend than him. I could do the shit that he never did. Up all night, I won't quit. Thinking I'm gonna steal you from him. I could be such a gentleman." She sings this part with you, using the biwa to also change the settings. It gets a bit dizzy, but you love the display. She is very proud of her power. "Plus all my clothes would fit." She sings that part alone once you are both in the same room.
You look at her, she smiles at you. Seeing you are not going to sing anymore, she speaks. "I liked your song. Let's do this again some time. It's a date." She says, just before leaving you in your home. A date... you are proud of yourself, that's it. The lesbian power of the song did it trick, like you knew it would. You. Won.
Akaza:
Akaza doesn't know why he hasn't shown himself, he just... got lost in the song. It's one he knows, the melody,, the lyrics, the meaning... "Il n'est pas fou. Il l'aime c'est tout. Il la voit partout. Il l'attend debout. Debout une rose à la main. Non, non plus rien ne le retient." It's a lovely song, he can't think other way to describe it that is not deppressing, to be honest, and he doesn't want to think this song as sad, even if his chest aches a bit with it. "Dans sa love story!" "It's a love story", as said before, he knows the lyrics, he knows the meaning, and Akaza likes it. You keep singing for a while before even realizing he is there, but one second you open your eyes and turn around, facing the golden eyes.
"Em... how long have you been standing there?" You ask embarrased, blushing as Akaza also has some red in his cheeks. He doesn't answer your question, just takes some steps forward to grab gently yet firm, somehow desesperate, your hands into his. "Can you please keep singing? Please?" He asks twice, looking away as he whispers the secon pleading. You decide to just keep singing. "Je serai riche. Et je t'offrirai tout mon or. Et si tu t'en fiches. Je t'attendrai sur le port. Et si tu m'ignores...." "And if you ignore me...."
You know, you have seen, that Akaza is mourning, yearning, or something. You don't know, he himself doesn't know, but that nostalgia and melancholy.... sometimes you feel it takes him away from you. That is why you didn't want him to listen you sing about him, to confess. Because you are unsure id he will "Je t'offrirai mon dernier souffle de vie." "Give you the las breath of my life" and yet he keeps singing for you without letting your hands go. "Dans ma love story!"
"Et il y a toi..." Akaza waits for you to continue, tender and adoring eyes, "Et il y a moi." Yes! There is you. There is! And you are hopeful Akaza is there, is here, too."Et personne n'y croit. Mais l'amour fait d'un fou un roi. Et si tu m'ignores.... J'me battrai encore et encore!" "C'est ta love story!" You take that as a confession, and it shows in your blushed face and adoring eyes, he seems to agree in it. "C'est ta love story!" And of course, you join. "C'est l'histoire d'une vie! Love story!" You just look at each other, not bothering with the world, and giving in to tentation. You both kiss.
(And actually have to talk things through AFTER, you know? This is not a musical, as romantic as it was.)
Douma:
"Shut up and listen. Look at my eyes, don't tell me lies. I need you to tell me truth." You started singing on your own, but Douma got in the room, looking curious. He doesn't move besides closing the door besides him, doesn't speak, just... stands ghere, watching you. But part of you feels like he is urging for more. It's hard to tell, because he always urging for more of everything. "You gotta be clear, tell me the details. I gotta know as much as it hurts. I need you to tell me the truth." More violence, food, attention, power, sensations, pain... it's unclear most of the times. It becomes really hard to tell if he actually likes you.
"Bet you like it when I show up in a gown. Let my body work it out, slow your grind. Don't tell me to stop it, just let me on top and. Baby, you want it, yeah." He sings after you repeat the same part, maybe he hust wanted to do that. If it's because he wants to share the song with you or if he is just messing around... Douma himself probably isn't 100% sure. "When you tie me, do it slow, forget the time. Move position, take me south, ease your mind. Don't tell me to stop it, just let me on top and. Baby, you want it, yeah." He goes to grab you, to press his body against you. He understands the lyrics, not being able to recognize emotions doesn't make him stupid or inmune to sex. This is probably how the night will end.
Maybe it's better that way. "Slow it down if you need to, oh. Show me how just to please you. Ooh, work it out in the sheets. Do me and see through, I want to you feel you." Staying safe, showing intimacy in a way Douma can actually understand it, instead of leaving him guessing and wondering how he should feel. How a normal human, even a normal demon, would feel. You wish these things could be explainede with words in a language Douma fully knows. But the language is not the problem, nor is Douma or you.
You spend the night together, limbs tangling both bodies. Douma is content, satified, you too. Even if you feel like there a lot more things to say, but there is hardly a moment or a way to do so....
Kokushibou:
"Tsuki no kaasu tsumetai yume no naka de....." If you ask Kokushibou, music that is not in japanese is not real music. He is stuck in his own ass, always too focused on tradition and hierarchy and how japan is the "raising sun" blah blah blah. Sometimes he gets very annoying like that, to the point loving him does feel like a curse. "Kotoba no nai sekai de. Bokura wa ai wo kataru. Itsuka kimi ni todoku made..." wait a sec- Kokushibou is behind you, isn't he? You turn around and yep, he is. "Kokushibou-san...."
He keeps quiet for a while, like always, until he finally thinks he has something worth saying. "I like that song. Can you keep singing for me?" You really wanted to say no, but you also wanted to sing for him. After all, this song is recorded in your mind just for him. "Tsuki no kaasu. Tsumetai yume no naka kara. Kimi wo tooku tsuresaritakute. Dokomade yukeru. Ai wo shinjite ii basho made." Maybe another person, demon or human, would have joined and singed with you. Kokushibou did not.
"Dokomade yukeru. Ai wo shinjite ii basho made. Yoru no mukou futari dake de." Ypu finished the song for him, barely getting any reaction. This song is really perfect for you both. "Thank you for singing for me." He barely understands, it's not a surprise for you to have to actually explain it. "I did it because that is how I feel about you." Silence again, you are more than used to it. Kokushibou is not a person of intimacy, of sharing feelings, he clearly doesn't know how to answer back, and part of you feels guilty for putting him in the situation of having to. "I see."
He leaves after that, and you know he will evade you for at least a week or two from know own. If you are lucky he will want to talk about it after that and tell you he feels the same. But until then... it's a "Moon's curse in this icy dream."
Bonus:
Muzan: And then Nakime is going to su-
*Song from above starts playing in the background*
Muzan: Excu- *looking around* ..... Who is playing....?
Akaza: Is something wrong, Muzan-sama?
Muzan: Am I the only one hearing this?
Gyutaro: ..... I don't hear anything.
Nakime: Sorry.
Kokushibou: Hmn?
. . .
Y/N humming with the song on their head: Mhmnhmnhmn mhn hmn hmn mhn.
Muzan: SHUT THE FUCK UP, IT'S BEEN 5 HOURS WITH THAT SAME SONG! AT LEAST PUT SOMETHING DIFFERENT! Pathetic creature, who is this even for?!
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klausinamarink · 7 months
Text
Prompt: “rain” (discord drabble from STWG)
Forecast said that today was going to be bright and sunny with some clouds later in the evening. The weatherman even said it was recommended to “go outside and spend a few hours with your loved ones.” They said. Nothing else can go wrong, they said.
Well…
“It could be worse.” Steve mutters as he stares at the windshield. The rainstorm isn’t bad enough to ruin the outdoor visibility, but it’s throwing several hundred drops per second on the slightly foggy glass.
“Worse how?” Eddie stares out through the passenger window, where he’s watching the muddy puddles on the roadside slowly grow bigger.
“It could’ve been a tornado.”
Eddie pinches his bicep, earning a chirpy eep! from Steve. “Well, thanks. Now that’s gonna worry me for the rest of the day.”
They’re parked next to a field farmland with a patch of woods visible further down. Steve had been driving Eddie to some spot he declared was perfect for a picnic visit, but then the clouds opened up not even ten minutes after they left town.
“Well, since we’re waiting this out…” Eddie reaches an arm over to the basket Steve had made in the backseat. He manages to pull out one of the bread loaves, breaking it in half. “Best not to wait on empty stomachs.”
Steve rubs the new red spot on his bicep, sighing and accepting the other half of the bread Eddie hands him. He sniffs, his fingers pinching the brow of his eyes and oh no-
“Hey, Steve. This is okay!” Eddie shuffles in his seat so that he leans over, his head bumping onto Steve’s shoulder. “I mean, we could’ve been drenched like dogs if we were outside right now. Plus I still get to be out of town with my favourite big boy in his amazing Beemer.”
Steve makes a light scoffing sound. “I’m your only big boy.”
“Exactly.” Eddie presses a kiss on his cheek with a loud mwah. It makes Steve roll his eyes, but his hand falls from his face and there’s a small smile now. He turns on the radio and a cheery man’s voice comes in-
“Today is nothing but promises of sun-”
“Is that the same weather guy?” Eddie narrows his eyes as Steve immediately switches the channel.
“If it is, they should fire this guy. Only clouds in the evening my ass.” Steve shakes his head, turning the dial until he stops at one of the music channels. Of course, it’s playing “It’s Raining Men” because what the hell not.
Steve’s eyes light up. His body jolts up like he’s been struck by lightning. “Oh shit! That’s one of my favourite songs!”
And then to Eddie’s absolute horror, Steve jumps out of the car and into the rain
“What the fuck!?” He almost chokes on spit and half-eaten bread just as Steve starts dancing. He’s singing the lyrics aloud as he spins and jumps on the muddy ground, seemingly giving zero fucks about being soaked and dirty. Especially as his shirt sticks to his skin with his muscles visible-
Oh, be still my gay heart.
“C’mon, Eds!” Steve’s making grabby hands, mimicking in pulling an invisible rope towards him.
“Uh, why?! I thought we’re waiting it out!”
“It’s raining men! Hallelujah!” Steve sings absurdly loud instead of answering. He even emphasizes it with a jerk of his hips goddamn.
It makes Eddie laugh. He looks out at the hard pouring and mutters “Fuck it.” He swings open the door and cringes at how unbearably wet he already is.
Steve’s arms are around his torso and easily lifts him off the ground, spinning him around. Eddie is both screeching and cackling, his cold hands gripped on Steve’s forearms for dear life. “Jesus Christ, we’re gonna fall!”
“God bless Mother Nature, I’ve found my perfect guy!” Steve cheers. He sets Eddie back down, but holds both of his hands as he starts moving in what Eddie presumes is the Harrington mating dance.
Eddie follows along because it’s too contagious not to laugh and dance with Steve, who looks more happier and free than Eddie’s ever seen.
They’re definitely both going to be sick tomorrow after this, but all of this dancing and standing in the rain with his boyfriend is so worth it.
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sprinklesofktrash · 2 years
Text
ATEEZ reaction to ‘fuck me’ eyes:
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Hoongjoon:
“Baby tell me how I look when I do this” You tug his shirt so he could look at you. Hoongjoon look up from trying to write lyrics.
You reenact to the video you saw. When you finished, Hoongjoon just sits there. “Awh!” He lean in to pinch your cheeks. You blush as a smile form up your lips.
“Don’t you feel silly?” Hoongjoon eyes focus back on writing his lyrics. You hiss and turn away.
Seonghwa:
Your relationship with Seonghwa would be fill with love and a lot of cleaning. When it comes to cuddles, he would be the type to spoon you but you could feel his hard cock pressed against your back. You just know what he wants.
Watching a TikTok video one day, you decide to try the trend with the ‘Fuck me eyes’ and see how he would react.
Seonghwa scoff and rolled his eyes, continue to scroll through his phone. Not even a second later, he drop everything and straddle over you.
Yunho:
Yunho isn’t the type to show skinship in public but you, you didn’t care. You would kiss him or even hug him.
While waiting for the bus, you wrap your arms around Yunho’s torso. The best thing about having a tall boyfriend is that you can do the fuck me eyes any time.
You look up at Yunho who was stroking your head softly. He looks down to see you were pouting.
Yunho pout back. You started doing the fuck me eyes, making Yunho blush and look away. “My knees almost gave in” Yunho whispered making your both laugh.
Yeosang:
Yeosang doesn’t really like to show his emotions. He does it every now and then. You’re the outgoing girlfriend while he’s the calm and collected boyfriend. You both balances out each other.
“That’s cute!” You watch a TikTok on his lap. Yeosang try to look at your phone so you showed him it. “Can you do it?” He asks. You rolled your eyes.
“Can I do it?” You scoff. “Now it’s three in the mornin’ and I’m tryna change your mind” you mock to the video.
Silence.
“Hmm, yeah no. You got lazy eyes, this challenge don’t suit you” Yeosang cover your face with his hand. You burst out laughing, “that’s so mean!” You push his hand out of your face. Yeosang laughs with you and lean down to kiss your forehead.
“I’m kidding, you look kinda cute” he said against your forehead.
San:
“Why do you always have to film yourself?” San asks annoyingly as he put the car to park.
You were trying to film yourself doing the ‘fuck me eyes’ to see if you could do it. San on the driver seat watches you from the side.
You pressed play and begin recording yourself while San was watching. Once you realized you did it, you laugh so loud and got excited over it.
“Oh my god, it’s so funny, I forgot to laugh” San said nonchalantly. You groan and hit his shoulder for being so annoying.
Mingi:
You showed a video that you posted on TikTok, while Mingi watches it, you watch his reaction. His cheeks turns into a hint of red as he watches it.
“Phew, babe you have too much power, come here” He pull your chin to look at him. “You’re so cute” he peck your lips before looking down at your lips and back at your eyes.
“Did you just-“ He cut you off by kissing you again.
Wooyoung:
Between two of you, it’s always been a race of who’s give the best aegyo, sadly he wins all the time.
While he’s busy at recording, you sent him an impression of you doing the ‘Fuck me eyes.’ You wanted to know see his reaction but sadly you didn’t get anything.
When Wooyoung came back from practice, he quickly grab you and hold you in between his arms. “That should be illegal! Do it again! Wait! If this is for TikTok, let’s record! I promise to make it look like it’s my first time seeing it!” Wooyung excitedly, shaking you with him.
Jongho:
Jongho is the type to cringe at every cute things you do. He hates it when you’re being cute but lowkey likes it.
“Babe, look” you bat your eyes at him, pouting along the way. Jongho stare at you before he gag. You rolled your eyes after you saw his reaction. You threw a pillow at him, making him laugh.
“That’s cute, you thought you were being cute” he continue to laugh at you.
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waterparksdrama · 10 months
Note
can I ask what your critiques of IP are? like is it an issue of personal taste or do you have issues with the production/lyrics?
ok im gonna get this out first is that i listen to tons of music from radio hits to avant garde experimental noise so it kinda surprised me how grating some of these songs were on first listen. i think it's mostly awsten's vocals that are putting me off tbh. he really lays on this overly emo enunciation he has on this entire album which kind of just makes me want to laugh in his face like a jock to an emo kid. he is fucking straining in some of these and i think the only time it works is in the why can't i cover and that's not even an actual track it's just a bonus.
and i think that stacked with the lyrics just make me roll my eyes. because on one hand he attempts humor at some of them, but deep down i know he is so genuine about it i cringe (this is how i never forget he's a millennial). not only that but the lyrics when referencing awsten's explanation for the album's themes, the references to religion and sexuality are so fucking shoehorned in there it feels like when you're writing a resume and shoving in keywords the employer wants to hear. it's ironic, really because awsten's generalized the lyrics so much that shoving in these references sounds kind of counterintuitive to the point he's trying to make of religion entwined with sexuality because like....it tries so hard to make that point it just barely gets one of those points across.
also this is my chance to bitch about blackbear features i swear to god you hear one, you've heard them all he literally sounds the same in every one of them oml.
but the thing is to me for both aspects is that, it kind of just feels like a rehash of things they've already done better before and falls flat in the moments when they do interest me by being too in your face either with the overly blunt lyrics or saccharine production.
-iz
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cakejerry · 9 months
Note
I need to hear more on why you dropped BTS before
Ok. Tl;dr desperation for american validation beginning in 2017
Pretty normal scope of events actually.
1. Fucking hated spring day when it dropped, snoozer ballad, liked not today better. It doing so well on the charts only made me angrier. I had preordered both versions of the album and it turned out to only be a shitty repackage beating a dead horse (hyyh symbolism) into the ground. Stopped paying attention to their live shows as much but still kept up with the fandom.
2. Then boom they're being invited to billboard for a fake ass popularity stunt and everyone's acting like it's such a big deal. Bitch what the fuck is billboard? I genuinely dgaf. American validation desperation starts. I keep up with their releases even less. They're being cringe as fuck selling out to america and bringing in idiots to the fandom. I start hating the way namjoon is acting, as I look back on those days now he's trying WAY too hard with the aegyo and it's fucking annoying.
3. Bts outcast. I just... So cringe. So, so cringe. And everyone was acting so... Idk. People tweeting about jimin dying and laughing and making it blow up until there were actual billboard articles being written about it. Google it if you dont know what im talking about. Some of my tweets from the period:
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4. Love yourself concept teasers drop. There's a bunch of random girls for no reason, giving all of them het plotlines in a story about friendship. Cringe. Someone tweets "dont sexualise their relationship with the girls don't disrespect them like that!" and someone replies "yoongis girl is going to eat his ass i can see it in her eyes" (very important to the narrative). I start feeling disconnected from jimin and start finding jungkook very attractive.
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5. Dna teaser drops and im like ohhh this about to be good they're bringing retro back!! Turns out... They're going to be having the debut stage in america. I stay up with a friend all night watching it. Its exciting, but.... I don't care about america. I don't, i dont i dont. I truly dont. Oh yeah THE CHAINSMOKERS are on the album. I fucking hate collabs. I hate americans. But, whatever. The album is good. Like, really good. Serendipity is a jimin solo song, and I still love him despite my best interests. Best of me is good, pied paper is good, bojok is good, dna is GOOD... mic drop is fine, basic people are going to blow it up like they did with baepsae, but its okay. Im STANNING! But then the problems start arising.
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6. Mic drop steve aoki. Need i say more. The lyrics... The sound... We get it, you're hardcore. You're embarrassed to promote colourful pop like dna. You're tough boys who misuse aave. Its so cringe. No one says anything about it. Great. The collab... WHO IS STEVE AOKI??? IDGAF!!!
6.5 deliberately leaving this one out just to check if anyone is still reading... The worst betrayal of my life *shiv gif*
7. And then... the american promotions. I stop paying attention completely. I start resenting everything. The way they look, the way they talk. Fans start making fun of a pic of jimin where it looks like he didnt cut his toenails. Rumors start circling that he got his chipped tooth fixed. I... Idk. It's the little things. I can't describe how awful the fandom space was, you just had to be there. The american influx was awful. Burn the stage drops. Another cash grab. People make fun of jungkook being sick. The love yourself concept feels hollow. I go back to wings and realize we have lost the plot.. hoseok is singing about his real life mother and people are creating theories about how it all relates back to the hyyh storyline. Jungkook is singing about how much he loves his hyungs and he didn't even write the words; rap monster did. I hate rap monster. Rap monster changes his name to RM- its less cringe to the americans that way. They change their logo- its minimalist now, to appeal to the americans. They're not the bulletproof boyscouts anymore. They're beyond the scene. Its hybe, not bighit. They're embarrased. They're changing themselves. They write all of their songs. (They really dont.) No but they do! We have to chart. (Inflate those numbers guys!) They're the only kpop group worthy of success. They paved the way! They write their own songs. We can tell! (Stream stream stream). Im completely removed. I only hear about them through 3rd hand sources. Bt21... Merch... Money.. sell... Buy... Book, movie, another repackage album, another movie, a game, another game, buy, sell, money.... I see the video of jimins voice breaking in fake love-- I laugh. Oh they made him show his abs for that comeback... Great. We only love him for his body, anyways. Oh, they're collabing with some random white bitch.... Okay.... Its called boy with luv?... But boy in luv will forever be MY baby. They're BIG now. People talk about them. They don't know them like I do. I don't know them like you do. Idol drops and I catch glimpses of it. Its.. too much. Its awful. Everyone calls it the worst song ever. Hearing snippets on the radio at the gym, im bound to agree. I hear nicki minaj's voice. Shout out to korea. Why is she here? What is going on. Why.. why are they doing this. This isnt bts. I hear dynamite on the radio in the grocery store- i only know its bts because of Jimin's disgusting awful dying cat voice. I post about it. Its funny. I love to hate. The song is shit. The song is being payolad onto the radio in my small ass country because bts fans are genuinely crazy. Steam. Inflate. Buy. Break records. Pave the way. NO multis, ONLY solo. Someone says borahae. I don't know what it means. A japanese group i like covers butter. I cant listen to more than 3 seconds of it- it sounds like shit. Its in english. Why is it all in english? The rhymes sound like a third grader wrote them. Is this what my.. my bts are releasing these days? Are they not embarrassed? They're decked out in gucci and lv.. it looks like shit. They look like shit. Theyre embarrassing themselves. Theyre everything they swore theyd never become. Theyre the people they made fun of. They neglect the korean audience. They stop promoting on music shows- its all special release this, single package that. But lets mass buy it. Lets show our love. Money. Money is love. Money will buy them leopard print and tacky sandals. Are they still the same bts i knew? No... No, they're not.
I remember a jhope fansite dying back in the day. I remember that I had never heard about her before, but I remember feeling devastated. I remember feeling connected to her. As I write this, I am praying that she is well. We all came together and shared our condolences. It wasn't an event- we didn't trend anything. But there was a feeling of remorse that day in the fandom. Of community. I remember huddling around the phone with my friend- I had just gotten a twitter notification from bts. They just finished a concert in their red bullet tour. They post a group photo. It gets 10k likes.
Now every time I listen to a bts song in public this flashes in my mind.
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I hate bts.
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I read your review and listened to the album while getting ready this morning. Didn’t wake up for it, I’m done sacrificing my sleep for BTS, lol. I wasn’t expecting much because I knew it wasn’t for me, as I didn’t like Seven, 3D AND Too Much, lol basically none his collabs made it for me. Which, the album confirmed — both 3D and Seven are skips for me, I just can’t stand those songs.
That being said, I’m pleasantly surprised by some songs. I personally LOVE the sound of Standing Next To You, the 80s vibe! It’s a bit of deja vu as this trend has been going on for a while now but it’s right up my alley! Though I have to say it’s a tad bit too MJ-esque. I love MJ’s music, but it’s hard to make music inspired by him that isn’t too obviously inspired by him, if you know what I mean. But the sound suits my taste. That’s probably the song I’ll listen to the most. I could probably add Somebody and Shot Glass of Tears to my playlist as well. As for the rest, nothing special, maybe some songs will grow on me after some time?
The problem I have with the whole album is partly the sound — too generic, too mainstream pop, too much inspiration going all over the place, we’ve heard those songs over and over again, they’re well produced and catchy so it works but there’s not an ounce of novelty — partly the lyrics. I’m much more demanding for songs written in English (even though it’s not even my first language) than I am for songs in Korean. I’m not asking for poetry and deep meaning necessarily but it has to sound right, and in that department the album lacks a lot. For many tracks I noticed that, while I was warming up to the sound after a while, some lyrics just ended up toning down my enjoyment because they’re either way too basic or cringe (but I know I’m very picky when it comes to lyricism, I find so many songs so cringy, I’m probably just annoying) or they just don’t fit/sound right for me. I wouldn’t say it ruins the whole thing but I have to get myself accustomed and forced myself to not pay attention to it… For songs in Korean, I always read the translations and explanations about the songs but as my Korean is still pretty basic it doesn’t play a huge part when I listen to music in the language. I might become more demanding and hard to please as my level in the language increases (hopefully, I have to work hard).
Overall Golden is a bit better than I expected but not my cup of tea so while I’ve added a few songs to my playlist I probably won’t listen to the whole album a lot. Along with Layover, it’s the weakest in chapter 2 for me. But I’m impressed by Jungkook’s vocals, he really did challenge himself and worked on new techniques. I might not like the way he sings on several tracks but I can hear he worked hard on it. I love Jungkook so much, I feel a bad for being too harsh on him. And I appreciate his sincerity while talking about Golden, admitting that it was just not the right moment for a personal album, that he just went with the flow. I might not like the direction he took but at least he’s being honest about it. [How the fuck does it relate to his "golden moments" though? Hybe really just writes whatever for the album descriptions…]
Finally, about the MV… meh. Again, it’s nothing special? The outfit with the waistcoat is nice but not outstanding, it looks good on him, as for the rest? nope. That abandoned place in Hungary looks so impressive on pics but the MV doesn’t give it justice, they could have shot it in a studio using AI it wouldn’t have made a huge difference. The choreo, the photography — again, the 80s and MJ inspiration is a bit too much. Jungkook’s expressions are too exaggerated, it made me laugh lol sorry. He’s way hotter when he’s smiling and showing his goofy and cute sides rather than acting all tough. His Tik Tok challenges with LeSserafim and TXT were perfect in that sense, cute and sassy looks waaaay better on him, it makes him look so freaking attractive and powerful. The ‘mafia boss’ look suits Yoongi much better in my opinion. But I understand many fans like it on Jungkook, it’s how they want him to be. To each their own.
Overall the album is okay but nothing impressive, definitely some skips for me but I’m relieved there’s a few songs I really appreciate. I’m happy for Jungkook but I doubt this is an album we’ll remember in the future. I hope I’m not being rude. I wish people would also stop with the superlatives — breaking the industry, album of the year, mind blowing… everything is blown out of proportion, and coming from productors and people who collaborated on the album it’s just a marketing tactic for promotion but it’s getting annoying and it sounds fake. But I guess it’s fandom culture… Anyway, I’ll let it rest a few days to see if I change my mind and end up liking more songs. I’m happy Jungkook is satisfied, it’s nice seeing him happy.
Sorry this is way too long and I keep repeating myself!
Hi! Thank you so much for reading my review after listening to the album. That's really sweet!
I agree a lot on SNTY. I've heard the song a few times now. It's pretty catchy and powerful, but the MJ vocals at the end ruin the ending. It also ends really abruptly with an outro that sounds like a bridge. It's confusing when the song ends just like that. Many songs these days are like that. I think no song in Golden has a bridge? That's probably why I can never tell when the songs are about to end and stop paying attention halfway through.
Somebody is probably my favorite bside, Closer To You stands out because of the chorus, Shot Glass Full of Tears is growing on me, Hate You and Too Sad to Dance are pretty bland, I hate Yes or No, and Please Don't Change is meh and sounds too much like Closer to You. The issue with the album is structure and lack of cohesiveness. The song selection only makes sense after Please Don't Change. Why start with 3D and follow it up with Closer to You? SNTY makes sense after Closer to You, but after Seven? Seven after Closer to You? SNTY after Seven? And then Yes or No after SNTY instead of Seven? Why in the world... The songs also don't feel like Jungkook? I don't know if they will eventually, but I can't hear Jungkook in them. I can hear him in 3D and Seven. Hate You sounds like a song he would cover, but in general it's like they're not really him? SNTY sounds too much like The Weeknd too, especially the vocals, though JK is likely a better singer and sings really well in the song.
I don't even know the lyrics. It's hard to understand him tbh. He did a great job with his English pronunciation, but sometimes his accent is too noticeable. and I also keep spacing when listening to the songs. In SNTY there's a line that's like "left and right something" and makes no sense. And, yes, the songs have all been done before. Seven is by far the most refreshing and original to me actually.
Another issue with Golden is that the songs all feel really short and repetitive. I space out listening to them and before I know it they're over and I can't remember what the middle sounded like. I still can't remember how most of the songs end. I stop paying attention since they're so repetitive. 3D and Seven have bridges, but the other songs don't. Actually, Yes or No has a bridge, kinda, but it's not a good one and it's more like the pre-chorus. Jungkook's high note in that song sounds surprisingly bad. It's so thick and doesn't fit the song at all. So, yeah, most tracks sound unfinished.
Golden is neither worse nor better than what I expected. I think the issues with the album are Jungkook's lack of vision. As he explained, he didn't want to write the songs because he had nothing to say and doesn't love songwriting, so the lyrics are just lyrics, just images, not autobiographical, and apparently about love since it's universal. Thus the album has no message and the songs don't tell a story. He just wanted to try different genres and challenge himself, so the album sounds like a compilation of covers of different artists and less like a pop album. Jungkook's goals were to make a mainstream pop album and try many genres uncaring of messaging and refusing to settle on a specific sound... Imo the album was pretty much bound to feel unfinished and disorganized. It's almost mid by design.
Finally, about the MV… meh. Again, it’s nothing special? The outfit with the waistcoat is nice but not outstanding, it looks good on him, as for the rest? nope. That abandoned place in Hungary looks so impressive on pics but the MV doesn’t give it justice, they could have shot it in a studio using AI it wouldn’t have made a huge difference. The choreo, the photography — again, the 80s and MJ inspiration is a bit too much. Jungkook’s expressions are too exaggerated, it made me laugh lol sorry. He’s way hotter when he’s smiling and showing his goofy and cute sides rather than acting all tough. His Tik Tok challenges with LeSserafim and TXT were perfect in that sense, cute and sassy looks waaaay better on him, it makes him look so freaking attractive and powerful. The ‘mafia boss’ look suits Yoongi much better in my opinion. But I understand many fans like it on Jungkook, it’s how they want him to be. To each their own.
Took the words right out of my mouth!! Yes, the waistcoat look is sexy and very Jungkook - it's kinda sassy and androgynous - but his other looks, particularly the sparkly jacket are crap (and look like Enhypen rejects). I couldn't really put into words what was missing with the MV but it's exactly what you said! They shot the MV at a historical place all the way in Hungary but you can barely tell? All I noticed was a normal stage. They literally could've shot it in a green room and added CGI and I wouldn't have noticed. The MV is also so dark and monotonous? The MJ inspiration is an over kill. The choreo is good, from what I saw, but the MJ grunting and choreo at the end are just frustrating... JK's facial expressions are too exaggerated, thank you for noticing! JK's sexy when he's dancing and naturally makes these powerful and sassy facial expressions, he's naturally sexy when he's not wearing makeup and just chilling, but he was trying too hard in the MV and looked baby more than anything. I think he looks cool in all his TikToks, but sassy JK with LSF is a different kind of attractive haha.
As far as records go, I'm sure Jungkook will set and break them, but the album's nothing special and does not match his talent. He wasn't even sure about releasing it. If Jungkook had had all the time in the world to make an album, would it have sounded like this or would it have been better structured and more personal?
Don't worry, your post isn't too long! Mine is just as long! Thanks for the ask!! I love it when anons share their thoughts in such detail! I'm glad you enjoy the album overall.
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slutforsfender · 1 year
Text
𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧- 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭, 𝐬𝐚𝐦 𝐟𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫
𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚
I had hardly left my house since that night, too scared of seeing him again. I didn't even tell anyone what happened, just telling Phoebe I felt sick that night. How could I be so stupid? Telling the guy I have trauma attacks over about them.
I was currently sat on my windowsill, cigarette lit thinking back over my teenage years. Thinking about him, that's all I've done. The way rose still slipped out of his lips. The look of those blue eyes. Him.
Me and Phoebe were linked arms making our way to science, laughing over something that I told her about History as we met up after she had Geography.
"Aye at least I've avoided Sam well since November" I said as we walked through the door. 
Soon enough greeted by a new seating plan. Oh god. I looked all over the board for my name to soon see Sam Fender next to it, right at the back. 
I connected eyes with him as soon as we read the names. He sighed, hanging his head low while I let out a nervous laugh that I had never done before. 
The whole lesson was spent with me staring Phoebe down with help me eyes while fidgeting with anything I could. I definitely hated past me now. 
I had asked to sit with him while we were together because of my anxiety and she had denied but here we are. Now my anxiety is even worse. 
I sat in shock all through out lunch and when I saw him that afternoon, he was just as quiet. The next few months of that seating plan are gonna be fun. 
I internally cringed at the reminder of racing heart I had every single day after that. The one that I had now as I threw my cigarette into an ashtray. Sitting behind my keyboard, pressing random notes with a sigh.
And of course after a writing block since being back home as soon as I spend ten minutes with him, the lyrics flow. No surprise there.
"Struggle to put into words the way I loved you,                                        A shot of adrenaline                                                                                          With a mix of dreaming                                                                                    Until you screwed up, still saw the angel in you                                          Now I see the devil more                                                                                Darling this is a warning,                                                                                  I will tell everyone just how you messed it up
So I hope the flashbacks come your way,                                                    And the nightmares sting a little hard tonight                                            With a hit of shallow breathing                                                                       A payback of just what you did to me
So here's your reminder of how you couldn't compliment the one you loved,                                  Hold her close when she needed you the most,                                          Send her a 'hi how are you' text,                                                                  So you messed it up for your own shallow image,                                    Sick of blaming myself for your fucked up brain
Feel sorry for the girl that cried for you,                                                        Cause in reality you opened doors I never thought to                            Do you feel proud you broke my heart?                                                        Do you feel happy you won the breakup?                                                Do you feel great that your mates made my life hell?                                Do you feel accomplised?                                                                              Did it even scratch your heart?                                                                        Cause my love I don't see how you could feel oh so great
So I hope the flashbacks come your way,                                                 And the nightmares sting a little hard tonight                        With a hit of shallow breathing                                                                         A payback of just what you did to me
So here's your reminder of how you couldn't compliment the one you loved,                                    Hold her close when she needed you the most,                        Send her a 'hi how are you' text,                                                                      So you messed it up for your own shallow image,                                      Sick of blaming myself for your fucked up brain
I still picture that damn jacket you gave me,                                      Oh the safety I felt,                                                                                            You haven't worn it since that day                                                              Is that your sign?                                                                                                Or is that you cried?                                                                                          I know you loved me just as much                                                                So why did you break my heart?
So I hope the flashbacks come your way,                                                    And the nightmares sting a little hard tonight                                            With a hit of shallow breathing                                                                        A payback of just what you did to me
So here's your reminder of how you couldn't compliment the one you loved,                                          Hold her close when she needed you the most,                                          Send her a 'hi how are you' text,                                                                      So you messed it up for your own shallow image,                                      Sick of blaming myself for your fucked up brain" 
I stared at the fresh words in front of me, tears pricking at my eyes. I brought my knees to my chest and just let the familiar feelings engulf me. 
The reality is I was still that teenage girl just a grown up version who does things to escape. That teenage heartbroken girl never went. And every time I write about him, it comes up again.
----
hiya my loves! a new chapter omg what hahaha. this chapter is very special to me as i'm realising my inspiration for this book will soon be out my life and the song that Arabella writes is actually one of my own that I thought fit more than any other song. 
this book is so special to me and after realising the last chapter after not being active for a few months got so much love meant the world to me. i write this book as a form of therapy and healing through sam and seeing fellow sam fans love it means a lot. I love you guys 🤍
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nekrophoria · 2 years
Text
Music asks for @drawing-way-outside-the-lines
Thank you so much 💙
(Sorry for the weird format. Started writing this in my drafts and copying everything over on mobile is annoying as shit)
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Mel
6. a song from before you were born
"I think this one...?"
The Cure - The Same Deep Water As You
"Don't quote me on that though. "
7. a song that reminds you of yourself
Emery - Churches and Serial Killers
14. a song you didn’t like at first but warmed up to
Good Charlotte - I just wanna live
"Funny...i didn't like the song when it came out...and now it's the only Good Charlotte song I can still listen to without cringing like hell. "
15. a song from one of your favorite artists
"Uhh...not really sure if I have a favourite at this point...
Probably... Keith Flint - Laughs"
19. some of your favorite lyrics (explain why if you want to)
Keane - Somewhere Only We Know
"Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm gettin' old, and I need something to rely on
So, tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm gettin' tired, and I need somewhere to begin"
"Pretty...self explanatory."
22. a song from this year
(although Volatile technically plays in 2016 imma break the fourth walk here and pick a song from 2022 that I know he would like)
Korn - Lost in the Grandieur
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Mabon
2. an all-time favorite song of yours
"Don't have one."
("The Legend Of Zelda Majora's Mask OST - Song Of Healing" he listens to it to calm down/drown out noise)
4. a song in your native language (if english, choose a song from your country)
"These guys are English, least they kinda sound English I dunno."
Kasabian - Reason is Treason
7. a song that reminds you of yourself
"No."
(Slipknot - Dead Memories)
11. a song that makes you wanna dance
"For fuck's sake..."
(actually none that I can think of)
18. a song from a genre you usually don’t enjoy
"...why do people even give a crap about the genre?
If I like something I like it, if I don't...I don't. Simple."
(He hates pop music but Madonna - Devil Wouldn't Recognize You he strangely enough doesn't mind at all. Maybe it's the piano, or a positive memory connected to it he can't quite pinpoint....You didn't hear that from me though. )
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Simon
3. a song from your childhood
Tasmin Archer - Sleeping Satellite
"I think it was one of my sister's favourite songs for...quite a while actually. It was on pretty often and...I've just grown to subconsciously connect a lot of childhood memories with it."
7. a song that reminds you of yourself
Highly Supect - My Name Is Human
10. a song that makes you tear up
"Okay this one was hard. There are a lot of songs I absolutely adore but they don't really make me visibly emotional.
There was this one time. My dumb ass decided to do dxm on my own which was a damn bad idea because I was in a pretty vulnerable mental state all around. I was teetering at the edge of a bad trip throughout most of it, constantly trying to kinda pull myself back so...at some point I put on some music and got stuck on this one: IAMX - This Will Make You Love Again and the flood gates opened. I wasn't even really registering it, but it helped."
11. a song that makes you wanna dance
"Depends on the mood...Grendel - Harsh Generation is a pretty safe bet though."
21. a song that makes you nostalgic
Tool - Parabola
"That was the first Tool song I ever heard. Tool was the first band I really got into and...listening to this song really makes me miss this feeling of discovering a style of music you never quite heard before and this euphoric rush that comes with it.
That feeling's gotten rare these days. "
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kkryboygayman · 2 years
Text
little personal reflection rant thingy about my mental health progression
i am so fucking self aware that i metaphorically beat my mental illness half to death with a log
for the past 5-6 ish years i had the mindset of "i'm not gonna make it to 18. i don't want to be here. everyone hates me." i was so insecure of what people thought of me, i hated myself so much for any small thing that could be considered a "flaw".
and then i realized. you literally just don't have to care. everything is what you make of it. you can just do and think whatever you want. you just have to deal with the way things are. it's not "things happen for a reason" per se, more of a "things happen. yeah. what can you do?"
you just have to. go with the flow and accept most things. i don't like how my nose looks? welp, i can't change that, can i? that's how i was born, it's a crucial part of what i look like, what makes me distinct from another person. i'm trans, and yea, dysphoria is a bitch, but i've just accepted that fact. not the fact that i was born afab, but the fact that i'm trans. i'm not a cis guy, and i wouldn't be who i am if i was cis. i'd rather be perceived as a trans man than a cis man at times. i'm proud of it even (haha cringe pride month yea yea). it's not a girl body, it's a trans man's body. the parts that give dysphoria, they're not girly or feminine, they're just parts to some dude. people might disagree, but i know i'm right so it doesn't matter.
i used to be so uptight. i used to force myself to be emotional because people said i "wasn't empathetic enough." i used to get upset over the smallest things and jokes because i had the "that's problematic >:(" thinking process (i blame twitter. that site gave the worst mindset). i used to be so pressed over what people thought, if they didn't like me.
and then i came to the conclusion. "just don't give a fuck." and it has worked tremendously. i can let myself breathe, i don't worry much about those things anymore. i can laugh at the youtuber's insensitive joke. i can jam out to my favorite band even if they say faggot. i don't care if someone doesn't like me, at least i have other people who do, and that's so much more important. and y'know what they say, "any publicity is good publicity." ; in the words of patrick stump, "i don't care what you think, as long as it's about me."
it's really fuckin annoying and difficult when people tell you "don't worry about what they say" or something along those lines. but it is just like that. the only thing about that though, is that those phrases only work once you figure it out on your own. you don't understand until you just do. i just became self aware, that i'm a real person, and i have a whole life ahead of me. you never truly understand until you process these things on your own accord.
i don't want to die, i want to experience all the things i want, i want to try and live out the small dreams i have. i want to be a rockstar. like genuinely that's my dream. seems impossible and stupid, right? well, you won't know if you don't try. and so what if i don't become one? i have so many other things that could happen, i'm just gonna see where life takes me.
yeah, i still do have my moments, but this is an overall thing, not just my occasional breakdowns.
whenever my mind tries to run into the "what if"s and anxieties, i just distract myself, even if it's not completely. put on a youtube video, not something you have to focus too hard on. put on some music, sing along. one thing i find that really takes my mind off of things is reciting lyrics of a certain band's songs. it has to be the same band, and if you mess up you gotta start over.
tldr; the whole mindset that made my life so much easier is just "go with the flow, don't think about it too much." y'know what they say, ignorance is bliss. it truly is.
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3d-wifey · 3 years
Text
Temptation Sings
Pairing: Ryūnosuke Tanaka x Reader
Word Count: 3k
Warnings: Smut, fluff, senpai kink, p*rn watching, implied bisexual reader, excessive use of the word "babe" & some curse words
A/N: The senpai kink is sort of one-sided, but what kink isn't 💀 and the title is sort of based off a lyric from Super Freak by Rick James. Also, those are actual lines from a Hentai, but I fucking lost it half way through so I had to improvise. Anyway, this is over 3,000 words of straight dog water. Enjoy!
Synopsis: You ride Tanaka while watching hentai
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"What kind of porn do you watch?"
"What?" Tanaka let out a quick bark of laughter before staring at you with wide eyes. His hand was frozen over the bowl of popcorn as he turned his full attention to you. The two of you had been dating for over a year now, yet, you've never had sex.
Sure, there had been some over the clothes stuff before. Some tops off heavy petting, some groping while making out, but it had never progressed past that. Not for a lack of trying, of course. Anytime you could find time to hang out alone, something would always interrupt you.
You weren't a virgin, but you didn't have much experience, so, naturally, you were more than a little nervous. And Tanaka, bless his soul, was pretty understanding. As long as you two could still make out and he could grab your ass, he seemed fine. But, he's still a teenage boy, no matter how respectful. He could only handle being blue balled so many times. And you wholeheartedly felt the same way.
This seemed like the best way to go about it. Establishing a common interest in what you both liked to get the ball rolling.
"Porn. I know you watch it, Ryuu. So...what kind?" You sat up on your side of the bed and leaned against the headboard, knowingly making him eye level with your breast. Nothing wrong with a little incentive.
"Okay, wow. You're serious. Um," he stuttered, eyes flickering over your chest and back to your eyes, before a blush settled flooded his cheeks, "You're just gonna laugh." He moved his gaze over to the movie playing on the laptop, avoiding eye contact. Was he embarrassed? He should know by now that you didn't judge.
You wouldn't be dating him if you did.
"I promise I won't laugh, baby. Look, I'll go first," you moved the bowl of popcorn off his lap and grabbed his hands to pull him up, "Pay attention."
"Wha–"
"There's Amateur, Lesbian," you ignored his questioning look and kept going, "Creampie, Fingering, Solo male and female, Public, and Taboo. That's all I can think of off the top of my head. You like any of that?"
He stared at you slack-jawed. Had you been too forward? You thought if you were honest about it, you both could be comfortable with each other. You watched in anticipation as he moved his gaze from you to the ceiling.
"Thank you, God," he whispered, almost on the verge of tears, "I must truly be blessed."
"Are you serious, Ryuu," you scoffed, hitting his arm to hide how relieved you really were, "You made me anxious for nothing!"
"That is so hot, babe," he grinned excitedly, moving to sit on his knees with his legs folded under him, "All that stuff sounds cool, and we're definitely gonna come back to that lesbian thing later, but I usually just watch...Hentai." He cleared his throat, scratching his cropped hair.
You pulled the laptop over to you and paused the movie playing. Pulling up the browser, you typed "Hentai" in the search bar, and hesitated for a second.
Hentai. Of course, it was hentai. You weren't surprised in the least that he got off to cartoon characters fucking. In fact, you expected it. You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to date him. You briefly wondered what kind he watched before it hit you.
Oh, yeah, you thought, he'd like that.
"What are you doing, babe?" He questioned. You paid his nervous laughter no mind as you queued up the perfect video. You were a genius.
_
"Are you okay with this, Kasuri?"
"I've been telling you that it's okay!"
You watched as the small girl pushed the boy on the ground and climbed on his hips to straddle him backward. To your complete surprise, you were actually kind of invested in the plot. Sure, some of the lines made you cringe and the ethics behind the sister trying to fuck her brother were a bit iffy, but, somehow, it was keeping you entertained.
The less than spectacular writing didn't seem to be affecting Ryuu any. With how much he jerked off to this kind of stuff, you figured he was probably used to it.
"I want you to take it...take me Senpai."
You felt Tanaka stiffen up beside you before quickly relaxing. Well, more like you felt him force himself to relax. You watched out of the corner of your eye as he subtly, or as subtle as Tanaka could be, adjusted himself in his sweats.
He was trying very hard to hide how much the video was affecting him; however, you always found Tanaka easy to read. The furrow of his brows, the twitch of his muscles, the restless tapping of his fingers along his thigh—all of it was effortlessly understood like the words of a well-loved book.
He was holding himself back for some reason that you couldn't find the effort in yourself to figure out, but he wasn't the only one affected.
"You have to tell me what you like. You have to teach me, senpai."
There was that stiffening again.
You placed your hand high on his tense thigh, completely ignoring the eyes burning into the side of your face. Unlike Ryuu, you were a fantastic actor. You decided you would wait for him to fully relax, or be as relaxed as any teenage boy could be while watching porn before you would strike.
You waited for the moment his leg softened under your hand and oddly enough it was at the point in the video where they showed a very detailed shot of the boy coming inside of the girl. He probably thought it was ending soon. Little did he know you were going in for the kill.
You cuddled further under his arm before you looked up at him with imploring eyes.
"Do you wanna do that...with me, senpai?"
It was just like any other kink, you rationalized. It was on par with the guys who were into being called 'Daddy' or 'Sir' or some other title. It didn't do anything for you, but if your magnificent hunk of a boyfriend got turned on by being called senpai, you were more than happy to go along with it.
"Well?" You prompted when he said nothing and gawked at you like a test he didn't study for.
"What did you call—is this—are we actually about to—" His wide eyes switched between you and the computer screen before deciding you were far more entertaining.
Instead of answering his stammering, you rose to your knees to pull the sundress over your head. You unhooked your bra and threw it off the bed with no regard for where it landed. It was a shame it wasn't one of your cuter ones, but you doubted Ryuu cared.
Your hands paused on the waistband of your panties when you realized he was frozen beside you, eyes flickering over your body like he didn't know where he should look.
"Am I gonna be the only one naked?" You would have thought he was on the court with how fast he jumped off the bed.
You watched from his bed as he struggled to get out of his clothes. It was adorable how excited he was, but he wasn't the only one. You've been waiting nearly thirteen months for this and you were practically vibrating out of your skin.
You were content to watch him almost bust his ass as he tried to get his sweats off when you remembered something.
"We don't need a condom. I'm on birth control." You started birth control years ago to handle your irregular periods, but it also came with the added benefit of Ryuu being able to cream you like a Twinkie.
He stared at you for a second with a blank face before closing his eyes with his hands clasped together...almost like he was praying? You heard him whisper something suspiciously along the lines of him being blessed before he practically bounded up to you like a hyper puppy
Probably not the best analogy to be made in your current situation, but it was true! He was bouncing on the balls of his feet and shaking his hands out like he always did before a match. You briefly wondered if he ever did this before. He never told you if he got this far with any of his exes and you never asked.
At that moment, you decided it didn't matter what he did before because you would be the best he ever had.
Your hands shot forward to pull his underwear down before pausing.
"Is... Is this okay?" You asked, hands hovering over his boxer briefs. For the first time during the entire affair, you were hesitant. What if you were pushing too fast? You hadn't exactly asked anything. You just gave out demands and he followed. You wouldn't be able to live with yourself if you ended up pressuring him into this.
"I—," he stopped, staring down at you with wide eyes and for a split second, your heart stopped, "Are you kidding, babe? God, yes, it's okay!"
You honest to God giggled when you pulled him onto the bed with you and clamored onto his lap, like the stereotypical school girl. You calmed yourself down enough to just look at him. The way he gazed at you with a year's worth of pent-up desire made slick dampen the seat of your panties.
"You're just—you're beautiful. God, I love you so so much," the sincerity in his voice was amplified by the goofy grin he gazed up at you with and the blush on the apples of his tan cheeks, "you know that, right?"
One look at Ryuu and even a blind man could see how much he loved you. It was a good thing his feelings were mutual or it'd be pretty embarrassing.
"I love you too, idiot," your hand settled on the back of his close-cropped head to pull him into a kiss. And in typical Tanaka fashion, he kissed you like you were the only thing keeping him alive. He kissed like his only goal was to leave you as breathless as you made him. And he always succeeded.
"Now," you took a deep breath, "are you gonna fuck me, senpai?"
The groan he let out against your lips was more than enough of an answer for you.
You rushed to pull your panties off, thanking whoever was watching over you that it wasn't one with holes or bleach stains on it.
You reached to pull him out of his boxers, but he beat you to it. It gave you pause how he whipped it out like it was nothing to gawk at.
A little over half the length of your forearm, his dick was nothing to scoff at. He was the same width as your wrist with a thick vein running up the underside of his shaft.
Not the first dick you've seen but by far the biggest. Your heart rate picked up as you thought of the logistics of how he'd even fit inside you. You'd probably have trouble with just the tip.
You pulled the foreskin back to see precum already collecting at the angry red head. He jerked when you took the heavy weight of his dick into your hand and you could barely wrap your fingers around him. You didn't think he'd be so sensitive but you called yourself thankful for it. Easier to tease.
You rubbed his tip against the opening of your pussy and pulled away, strings of slick still connecting you. You repeated the action a few times before taking pity on your poor boyfriend. You used his quiet moans as motivation as you pushed his head past your tight hole.
You hissed at the unexpected stretch. The burn veering on the side of uncomfortable, but not painful. You couldn't tell if it was because of how long it had been since the last time you had sex with anyone or if it was because of the sheer size of him.
You decided it was the latter as you tried to take more of him.
"Here," you grabbed one of his thumbs and rubbed it over your clit in quick circles. The callused pad pleasurably rough against the slick covered bud. Luckily, he caught on quickly and kept up the pace as you tried to sink further down. The ache in your walls added to the pleasure on your clit.
You sighed once you finally reached the base. You hadn't expected this much effort would go into just taking him.
He was panting hard, eyes closed and struggling to hold still enough to let you adjust.
"Okay," you breathed, "okay." You slowly rose to your knees and peeked at his dick as it came out coated with your slick, before driving yourself back down with a moan. You settled your hands on his shoulders as you picked up a rhythm.
"You're such a badass, babe," he praised and you would have laughed if him shoving himself into you, thrust for thrust, didn't fuck a series of moans out of you.
You peppered quick kisses against his lips as you drove yourself up and down. You ran the tip of your tongue along his bottom lip before nipping at it. He eagerly took the hint and opened his mouth to you. You swallowed his groans as your hand slid up to the front of his neck and squeezed, tongues pressing together in an openmouthed kiss.
When you pulled away, his eyes flickered between your bouncing breasts, where his dick split you open, and your lidded eyes.
"I've dreamed of this for so long," you moaned as his hand resumed its motion on your sensitive clit. How he was able to piece together coherent sentences was beyond you, "Wanted you so bad, baby. So. Bad."
The headboard slammed into the wall as you sped up your pace. You were lucky you two were the only ones in the house.
"That's right, babe. Bounce on Senpai's dick. Fuck," he cursed, voice cracking when you swiveled your hips, "You like that, don't you? My pretty girl." You didn't want to admit it, but the senpai thing was really doing it for you. Not the actual word, but the sheer affect it had on him.
You can't say you were surprised by how talkative he was, his dirty words dripping over your overheating body like rich syrup. If you knew watching porn would lead to this, you would have done it ages ago.
His big hands used his grip on your ass to rock you back and forth at a faster pace. You relaxed your legs and let him take the lead, pulling his head towards your chest. The animated girl's moans on the computer combined with Tanaka's and created a harmony that pushed you closer to your release.
You moaned freely into his neck as the change of positions dragged your swollen clit over his pelvis with every buck of your hips. Sweaty bodies pushing and pulling against each other in a motion that was more grinding than riding.
Wet and sticky slaps echoed around the room, punctuated by the meat of your ass meeting his wet thighs. Thighs made wet by your juices collecting at the base of his cock.
Your release bubbled low in your stomach, steadily being pushed higher with every one of Tanaka's sloppy thrusts. It pulled heavily from below your naval, expanding to the point where you felt like you could burst. You weren't a virgin—this wasn't your first time, but, God, it felt like it was. And it might as well be your first time with how sensitive he made you.
You were sweaty and you were sore and so, so completely overwhelmed. But your mind was wonderfully cloudy with the pleasurable haze of an incoming orgasm and it made it hard to care.
"You close, babe?" You whimpered out a weak yes as his lips trailed from your jawline down to your damp neck before sucking on the skin.
"Can feel you squeezing me. So damn tight." He panted against your heaving breasts.
You knew it was coming, but knowing and feeling were too different things. Your thighs burned with fatigue, but you couldn't stop. You were so close and the humid air blurred out everything that wasn't Ryuu's cock plunging against that spongy patch on your wall and you didn't want it to end.
He couldn't take his eyes off of you as you used him for your pleasure. Head thrown back and skin gleaming with sweat.
"Shit, I'm-" he grunted at the tightening grip your walls had on him, just begging him to cum, "Fuck, 'M not gonna last, babe." His hips twitched uncontrollably as he rammed into you.
The knot in your stomach built and built before suddenly loosening, your vision blanking completely. Not that you could tell with how far back your eyes rolled. Hands shooting forward to desperately cling onto him as you trembled. Nails digging into his tense biceps, a mantra of his name falling from your lips like a prayer. Your thighs shook as you rode yourself past the sensitivity.
And that's what does it for him, your impossibly tight heat clamping down on him. Tender balls pulled taut against his body as the white ring of cum coating his cock grew with every one of your thrusts down.
The only sound that escaped him was your name broken by his breathy moans.
Once you came back around, you're still dazed with cooling sweat gathering on both of your bodies. The air is still clammy and you were sore from your neck to your thighs but it didn't stop you from looping your arms around Ryuu's neck.
He gathered you into his warm chest, heavy arms locked around your waist.
"So," he huffed, "lesbian porn, huh?"
"Shut up, Ryuu."
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weelittleweasley · 3 years
Text
hopelessly devoted to you (f.w.)
prompt: rejection hurts. but what hurts even more is still being absolutely infatuated with the person who broke your heart. 
pairings: fred weasley x fem! gryffindor reader, george weasley x platonic reader
warnings: heartbreak, crying, language, underage drinking, very angsty, think early 2000s movie
word count: 8k
taglist: @rosaliepostsstuff​ @harrysweasleys​ @gcdric​ @lumos-barnes​ @whizboingies​ @lumosandnoxwriting​ @pxroxide-prinxcesss​ @c-t-h​ @lol-idk-oops​ @another-lonely-heart-blog​ @starlightweasley​ @parseltongueswriting​ @shilohpug​ @peachypotter​ @spacexcowgirl​ @paintballkid711​ @vogueweasley​ @rogueweasleys​​
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It was like pouring salt into an open wound. You forced yourself to look at Fred, how happy he looked as he linked arms with Angelina in the hallway, smiling widely, whispering something into her that made her throw her head back with laughter. You tried to convince yourself that making yourself watch them showed him that you weren’t heartbroken or sad or sorry for yourself when in reality, you were trying to cover up the fact that you were miserable. The wallowing feeling of jealousy and sadness ate away at your stomach lining as you nibbled on your bottom lip, trying to remain composed as they passed you in the corridors.
After they were out of your sightline, you let go of the breath you didn’t realize you were holding in as George places a hand on your shoulder. “You can’t keep beating yourself up about this, (Y/N),” he wraps his arm around your shoulder as you lean into him with a pained groan. “I know it’s been difficult for you, but it’s been two months. No need to dwell on someone like my brother. It’s not worth your precious time, darling,” he tells you as you walk down the halls of the castle, making your way to the Great Hall. 
With a huff, you look up at George who gives you a knowing look. He was right, but at the same time, there was no way he could understand the kind of pain it was to be so heartbroken, but still so head over heels for someone. “I can’t help it, George. It’s not something I can just get over. I didn’t just have a crush on Fred. He felt something too or else what happened that night wouldn’t have happened...” you trail off, the memory of that night playing in your head as you cringed to yourself.
Spirits were high as music blared in the common room. Laughter and celebration was in order. A great quidditch game was just won by the Gryffindor team against Slytherin and that meant a common room party unlike any other. Lee Jordan pushed the couch against the wall, clearing the space for a dance floor as Ron and Harry started pour up stiff cups of Fire Whiskey, Daisyroot Draught, and Gigglewater. 
“Georgie, put on something that people can actually dance to! Enough of the bloody Cotton-Eyed Joe!” Lee groans out as George bursts out into a fit of laughter, changing the song to something more universally enjoyable. “The Macarena is not acceptable either!”
Fred grabs a drink as people filed into the common room behind him, filling up the space quite quickly. Your heart flutters at the sight of Fred, but you bury your face in your cup as you take a swig of whatever liquor Ron had poured for you. “Oh come on, Jordan, the Macarena is a fan favorite!” Fred laughs as you shake your head, Fred dropping his left eye in a wink, making you gulp and avert your eyes as if it were wrong to look at the tall ginger.
Lee rolls his eyes and makes his way over to the boom box. “You both are dickheads, I’ll man the music,” Lee groans before switching the music to ABBA as people cheer out as the music fills the space. “See? People like ABBA. Not the fucking Macarena.”
Soon enough, everyone has a drink in their hand and is on the dance floor, screaming out the lyrics to Mamma Mia so loud that you could barely hear the original music that came from the boom box settled in the corner of the room. Instead of joining the masses on the dance floor, you kept to the side lines, sipping on your drink as you made conversation with Katie and Alicia, laughing at a joke Katie had just told. Every once in a while you would look at the dance floor, watching Fred as he jumped up and down, holding onto his brother and Lee, laughing as the liquid in their cups sloshed around. You smiled to yourself, seeing how happy they all were, especially Fred. The way his dimple-y grin caused a grin to appear on your face as you watched his every move. 
Fred was one of those crushes that no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t stop liking him. You tried distancing yourself, but that only made the feelings grow stronger. And it didn’t help that you were close with his family. Whenever you were with George, Fred had managed to weasel his way into the conversation. If you were with Ron, Fred would always pull you away so you could hang out with “the more exciting Weasley.” No matter what you did, the crush to Fred Weasley stuck. 
You shake away your thoughts as you turned your attention back onto the conversation with Katie and Alicia. Looking down at your cup, you see how empty it was. “I’m gonna grab another drink, anyone want more?” you survey the girls as they shake their heads. You make your way to the drink table, passing the dance floor before reaching the punch bowl. But before you could pour yourself another drink, you feel a pair of hands grab your sides, squeezing them abruptly, making you squeal out. “Oh my days!” you grab your chest as you turn and see it was just Fred. “What the hell is wrong with you,” you slap his arm with a small smile on your lips. 
He laughs, “Why aren’t you on the dance floor? I know you can dance, (Y/N),” he teases you as you roll your eyes. Fred places your cup on the table and grabs your hands, trying to pull you to the dance floor.
“No, no, no,” you groan in protest, pulling away from him. “I’m not dancing, Weasley.”
Fred has a cheeky smile on his face as he gives you a look that screams, Oh come on. “You know you want to,” he sing songs. “Your favorite song is playing too!” he tells you.
Furrowing your brows, you speak, “No, it’s not.” He holds up a finger before the song switches abruptly to Dancing Queen as the crowd cheers out in excitement. You give him a look, knowing that Fred had planned this. “Oh, you cheeky bastard. You can’t play this song and expect me to stay still,” you laugh as Fred joins in, wrapping his arm around you, the two of you running to the dance floor.
The two of you start scream singing the lyrics to the ABBA classic, Fred twirling you on the dance floor into his chest as the two of you rock back and forth to the music. You can’t help but sport the goofiest smile. You couldn’t be happier in this moment. You were in your favorite place with your favorite song playing, dancing with your favorite boy. Fred brought you close to his body, hips moving against yours as your heart rate escalated, face flushed. You would blame it on the dancing even though it was definitely a consequence of your close bodies.
“I’ll give it to you, (Y/L/N),” Fred speaks close to your ear. “You are the dancing queen.”
With a giggle, you reply, “Don’t you forget it, Weasley.”
As the song fades away in the background, the two of you just look at each other, small smiles on both of your lips as you take the other in. Fred’s hair was messy from dancing, but it was still pushed back to show his handsome face and strong features. His lips were curved up in a smile as he looked into your eyes, his big brown eyes filled with tenderness. He looked so happy and a happy Fred was a beautiful one. 
You didn’t even know how long you two spent looking at each other, but it didn’t matter. In this moment, you were the only two people in the common room, the music still blaring as students didn’t stop dancing and singing and laughing. But it was all a blur in the background, Fred your only focus, and you were his. 
It wasn’t until his forehead was pressed against yours that you noticed he was leaning down, pulling your faces closer together. You inhaled sharply through your lips as he made contact with your forehead. “Is this o-”
“Yes,” you cut him off sharply before he waits no longer to press his lips to yours as you melt into Fred completely, pulling his body closer to yours as his hands grab either side of your face, cupping your cheeks. The kiss was everything you had imagined. His lips tasted of sweet cinnamon that warmed up your cheeks and sent tingles down from your head to your toes. Fred’s lips moved gently against yours, his tongue sliding past your parted lips as you started softly snogging on the dance floor. Neither of you cared who watched or didn’t watch, right now this was about the two of you. 
Fred gently pulled away, keeping his forehead pressed against yours, hands still cupping your cheeks as you smiled from ear to ear. He was silent for a moment. But then he didn’t say anything. He just pulled away, removing his hands from your face as you looked at him, a little puzzled. “Freddie?” you speak gently, reaching out for his hand.
But he didn’t let you touch him. He just spoke, “I need to take a step outside for a second.” 
Before you could protest, he dashed through the maze of people and pushed the door to the common room open, disappearing. What just happened? Panic dashes through your veins as you follow him out of the common room and to the stairs. “Fred!” you call out for him as he turns around to see you standing there confused as he ran his fingers through his hair. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
He chuckles, “What’s wrong? (Y/N), I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
Your heart sinks and your mouth falls agape for a moment before you manage to speak, “What?”
“I shouldn’t have kissed you and I’m sorry for putting you in that position. It was wrong of me. You’re my best mate and I just royally fucked things up for us, didn’t I? I don’t want this to change anything between us,” Fred walks towards you, searching your eyes for hope for your friendship.
You smile gently and grab his hands. “Fred,” you start, “It’s not your fault at all, stop apologizing.” He exhaled, relieved. “But...I, um, I want things to change between us,” you confess as Fred gives you a puzzled look. “Fred, I like you. I’ve liked you for so long and when you kissed me I was so thrilled that you felt something too. Even if it was for a second.”
Fred sigh and stutters for a moment, looking down at his feet. “Good Godric,” he speaks just above a whisper as you force him to meet your gaze as you look at him, hopeful that he will reciprocate those feelings. “(Y/N)...” he gives a breathless laugh as you bite your bottom lip in anticipation. This would be his confession. He felt the same too. He had to. Or else he couldn’t have kissed you. “You mean everything to me. You’ve been my closest friend here for so long. But I’m afraid that’s all I see you as. My friend...I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you felt that way about me. I wouldn’t have kissed you if I knew.”
Your heart sinks to your feet as you peel your hands away from him and look at him with complete and utter heartbreak slapped all over your face. Fred immediately feels guilty when he sees your eyes become glassy. He tries to speak for himself but you don’t let him. “I have to go,” you speak breathily before running back into the common room, The Winner Takes It All blaring through the speakers. How fitting.
You couldn’t let anyone see you like this, so you ran straight to the girl’s dormitories, trying to avoid sorry eyes and worried glances. The tears flow freely down your face as you scurry to the stairs, hearing your name being called out by an all too familiar voice. But you don’t let yourself stop. You run up the stairs, away from it all. Away from him.
The night haunted you like some sort of sick joke. George knew how much it bothered you, so he tried his best not to bring it up. But seeing you so upset over something as silly as a crush on Fred made him upset. “Something you surely know about Fred is that is a damned idiot. He does a lot of things he shouldn’t,” George tells you as you lightly laugh. “But you can’t let him get the best of you.” You knew he was right, but you couldn’t help but morn this crush you’ve nurtured for so long. 
And now Fred was able to move on like nothing happened between the two of you. You avoided talking directly to him, rather going through a sibling to talk to him indirectly or just ignoring him when you were in a group setting. But if he talked to you, you put on your brave face and flashed him a smile like nothing was wrong. This only encouraged Fred to move on as well and as a result, Fred was now taking Angelina Johnson to the Yule Ball. 
“I just can’t believe he could bounce back like that though,” you speak as you walk into the Great Hall for lunch. “I mean really? He’s taking Angelina to the Yule Ball, one of our mutual friends, and he expects me to be fine? I don’t know. It just doesn’t sit right with me, Georgie,” you confess as you plop down at the table, letting your head hang in your hands.
Katie gives you a confused look before looking at George. “Is this about-”
“Yes,” George cuts her off as Katie nods her head, sipping her pumpkin juice. “Listen, forget about them, alright? It’s done. It’s over. You’re going to go to the Yule Ball, you’re going to look fucking fantastic, and you’re going to dance your ass off and have the time of your life with your hot date,” George shrugs as if it were a matter of fact.
A short curt laugh escapes your mouth. “Sounds great, George. Only problem is that I don’t have a hot date,” you give him a glare.
He smiles. “Of course you do. It’s me, you git,” he nudges you. You burst out laughing as Katie joins you, the two of you clutching your sides in amusement. “Hey! I make a hot date!” George exclaims over the laughter. “Besides, we have a great time together. We’ll take nice pictures, I’ll dress up for you, I’ll treat you like a proper lady. It’ll be fun. But expect no kisses. None of that will be happening,” he tells you with a shiver as you smack his arm. “It’s nothing against you! You’re just like my sister.”
“Yeah, yeah, fuck off, will ya?” you speak with a small smile as George chuckles, giving you a nudge. “Fine. We’ll go together to the Yule Ball. My dress is winter white, if you care. And please, don’t bring me one of those ugly corsage things.”
George smiles, “Aye-aye captain.” You sigh and start picking at the food on your plate. “Now you’ve got everything you need for the perfect night out. Aren’t you glad you’re going to the ball with me?” he asks as you roll your eyes, mimicking him.
“Who would agree to go to the ball with you?” a voice asks with a sneer grin in their voice. 
Looking up stood Fred with Angelina by his side as they took their seats across the table. Your heart starts beating faster as you just look away and pick at the chips on your plate. George, reading your body language, speaks up for you. Thank Merlin you had a best mate who knew you so well. “(Y/N) is. We’re going as mates, of course, but figured we’d both have the best time that way,” George beams, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as you give him a smile.
Fred laughs, “That’s one way of putting it. (Y/N), if you need help getting out of it, blink twice,” he teases you with a grin as you gulp.
“Actually I’m really excited to go with George,” you exhale. “Might as well go with someone who I really care for then go with a date that I need to impress and don’t know that well. I reckon we’ll have a ball,” you wink to George who rolls his eyes, laughing at your awful joke as you smile.
Fred just watches the two of you chuckle together as he slowly nods his head. Katie interjects and speaks, “Reckon you chose the cuter Weasley twin too, (Y/N).”
You look at Katie knowingly and join her laughter as Fred calls out in protest, “Oi! Bell, piss off!” Katie spits a raspberry at him before scooting closer to you as you lean into her side. At least you knew George and Katie would have your backs.
Angelina looks at Fred, linking her arm in his yet again, “I think you’re still cute, Fred.” Her words make your stomach curdle, but you don’t let the expression show on your face. Instead, you continue to eat your food and distract yourself with a conversation with George about what he’ll be wearing to the ball.
The entire time you distract yourself from Fred, you can feel him steal glances at you, monitoring how you spoke to George, throwing your head back as you laughed, grabbing onto his arm as he leaned into you. You and George were mates, nothing more nothing less, don’t get that wrong. But still something about the interaction made Fred jealous for whatever reason. Regardless of how Fred felt, you couldn’t let yourself care. Fred had moved on and it was time for you to move on as well and enjoy a dance with your best friend.
--------------
“A few more pictures and then we can get going. Mum will have a cow if I don’t send her any,” George tells you as Katie groans as she plays photographer. “Oh, quit the bellyaching, Bell. Just two more.”
George stands behind you and places his hands on your hips as you place your hands over his, the two of you smiling as the camera flashes and snaps more pictures of the two of you. “My cheeks hurt, are we done?” you huff.
“Yeah, yeah,” George huffs. “Thanks, Bell,” he tells Katie as the group of you gets ready to leave the common room and head down with the masses to the Ball. 
You run your hands down the front of your dress. The winter white silk clung to every curve of your body, the deep v necklace showing off your smooth skin. It wasn’t everyday that you got this dressed up; you almost felt out of place as you ran your finger through your hair, toying with the style you chose. “I look fine, right?” you ask George as you two link arms, headed to the ball.
George scoffs, “Fine? Fine? You look bloody gorgeous.” You smile fondly at George leaning into his side. “I’ve got the most beautiful girl on my arm, I feel like the luckiest guy in the world,” he nudges your arm as you chuckle. “I’m serious, I’m glad that we can go to the ball together, (Y/N).”
Looking at George with kind eyes, you speak, “I am too, Georgie.” George presses a kiss to your temple as you walk down the stairs, arm in arm. “Ugh, why couldn’t I have a crush on you and not your bloody fucking twin,” you speak through gritted teeth as George laughs.
“Would that be any better?” he looks at you knowingly as you huff. “That’s what I thought. Come on, you, I wanna show you off to Lee,” he giggles excitedly as you roll your eyes.
As you make your descent down the stairs, you scan the room. Everyone was dressed sharply in suits and beautiful ball gowns. Everyone looked phenomenal. And that’s when you saw him.
Perfectly tailored black suit. New. His hair slicked back, his gloved hands running through his hair. His hand held Angelina’s, but his eyes were all on you. You suddenly felt very aware of yourself in the space, but you didn’t let that throw you off balance. Instead, you held your head higher and smiled around at the people by you. But his eyes didn’t move from you. It was like you had him in a trance. A trance he had no intention of breaking.
When you reached the bottom of the stairs, you were greeted by Lee. “Wow,” he speaks. “Absolutely brilliant. You look incredible,” Lee beams. “And you look alright, (Y/L/N),” he teases as you roll your eyes, making George laugh. “I’m joking, you look phenomenal. I don’t know how you managed to get her to agree to go with you.”
George shrugs, “I have a gift, Jordan.”
You give George a look, “A gift for what? Behaving like a moron? In that case, yes, you have a very special gift.”
Almost on cue, a voice speaks from behind you saying, “You look great,” making you turn your head. You meet Fred’s gaze and you give him a soft smile while gulping. There he stood in his suited glory, Angelina clinging onto his arm, looking absolutely breathtaking. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, they made a very attractive couple.
“Thank you. You as well,” you say politely even though he did look absolutely ravishing. “You look lovely, Angie. Your dress is stunning.”
Angelina smiles and thanks you as the four of you just awkwardly stand there in a lull of silence. You look over to George, hoping he would take the hint and diffuse the tension. George notices your panicked stare and clears his throat, “If you don’t mind us, (Y/N) are going to go tear up the dance floor now.” He pulls your hand away from Fred as your eyes linger on him for another moment longer. “That wasn’t awkward at all,” he whispers to you. “In fact, that went better than I thought it would go.”
You sigh, “Don’t remind me. Now enough about them. I don’t want to think about it. I want a glass of punch and I want to dance.”
George squeezes your hand with a giddy smile. “Atta girl. Come on then.”
The entire night, you spent it surrounded by George, Lee, Katie, and Alicia, jumping around to the live music, laughing and smiling. It was your mission to forget about Fred and who he was dancing with, instead paying attention to your friends and how much fun you were having. 
Katie grabbed your hands and pulled you into the lot of students on the dance floor as you twirled her around, making her giggle wildly. The two of you pressed against each other, dancing to the wailing live band as people sang screamed along to the music. You were having the time of your life and Fred became the last thing on your mind, too busy letting the music ripple through your body as you let your hips swing to the music. 
But then the music slows down and over the mic the lead singer says, “Alright everyone. It’s that time of the night to grab that special someone and take it nice and slow.” With that, the band starts playing a slow song and soon everyone is in pairs, smiling at their date with eyes of adoration.
Katie huffs, “Well, that’s no fun, is it?” You laugh and push her arm, teasingly. 
You feel a tap on your shoulder and see a bent at the waist George, offering you his hand. “M’lady,” he teases as you roll your eyes, accepting the extended hand with a smile. “I’ll try my best not to step on your feet.”
“Oof, that will be hard considering you have fat feet,” you tease him as he chuckles. One of George’s hands rests on your lower back as the other holds you hand delicately in his, you resting a hand on his shoulder.
The two of you begin to sway back and forth to the music as you sigh, scanning the ballroom, trying to inconspicuously look for that couple. “Don’t look for them, (Y/N). You know it’ll just make you upset,” George tells you.
But as the words leave his lips, your eyes land on them and your heart sinks into the floor beneath your feet. Angelina is giggling as Fred spins her around and pulls her back into his chest. Fred is chuckling as he holds her as if she were the most precious thing in the world. They looked so happy together and that’s what made you feel so upset. “Too late,” you huff as you watch Fred duck his head down, placing a kiss onto Angelina’s lips as you suck in a breath sharply. He kissed her just as he kissed you that night in the common room.
You turn away from the sight and look directly ahead of you, pretending you saw nothing with a shake of your head, but your eyes were fogging up with tears. “Don’t cry over him,” George squeezes the hand that rests in his. “We didn’t come here for you to cry over a boy. We came here to have fun. Crying isn’t any fun, is it?” he tries to catch your gaze as you give him a sad smile. “I don’t like seeing my best mate upset. Yeah, that’s right. My best mate.”
With a soft laugh, you take a deep breath in and calm yourself down. “You’re right. You’re right. We came here to have fun. I’m perfectly fine. I’m perfectly happy,” you tell George who gives you a reassuring wink as the two of you continue to sway. But with every passing moment, you keep wanting to look at them. What were they doing? Were they still dancing? Were they laughing? Were they kissing? What did Fred do? 
Inevitably giving in, you turn and look at them again and see Angelina resting her head against Fred’s chest as they sway. Her eyes are closed peacefully as she listens the sound of Fred’s heartbeat mixing with the serene music that plays. But Fred on the other hand is looking right back at you. His eyes are fixated on the way his twin brother holds you in his arms, his jaw lightly clenched as you look directly back at him. Your eyes are full of pain that you try to blink away, but Fred knows how you are feeling. There was no place to hide. Fred Weasley knew you too well. “Look away,” George tells you as he follows your line of sight. 
“I can’t,” you manage to sigh out. “He gets the very best of me.” You look at Fred’s eyes and how they stare deep into you. He knew that you wished it was you resting on his chest, and somewhere deep inside he wished the same. You avert your eyes from the boy and turn to George and speak, “Could we go outside? Get some fresh air?”
George nods, “Absolutely. Come on then.” You link your arm with George and start making your way out of the ballroom and away from the happy couples. Away from Fred. 
The two of you make it out to the courtyard that was beautifully decorated with roses and mixed winter flowers as you suck in the cold, crisp air, refreshing your lungs and hot face. The breeze makes your dress bellow in the wind as George leans against the wall as you take a few deep breaths. “Take the time you need,” he tells you.
You turn to George with a kind smile. “I’m sorry I’m pulling you away from the ball. You should be having fun and not worrying about me. Quite the date I am,” you sarcastically laugh as George shakes his head.
“Don’t apologize. You’re not just my date, you’re my friend. I want to make sure that you’re doing okay. That’s my priority. Take the time you need and when you’re ready, we’ll go back in and spike the punch,” he jokes making you laugh. “Eh, why wait,” he shrugs before pulling out a small flask from his jacket pocket.
You laugh, “Of course you brought it with you. Godric, I love that we’re best friends.” George hands you the flask as you take a long drag from it, the warm whiskey trailing down your throat and warming up your chest and stomach. You hand him back the flask with a small grimace, making George chuckle before sipping from it as well. “I fucking hate balls.”
George shakes his head, “Yeah. I’m not too fond of them either. To be quite honest with you, I’d rather go back to the common room and fuck around.”
Your eyes light up. “Can we do that?” George furrows his brows in confusion. “What’s left to do at the ball? Pretend like we’re enjoying ourselves?” you ask. “I know the both of us are just going to drink more and pretend to like the music, so why not just go into the common room and drink more and listen to music we actually like?”
He smiles and shakes his head, “You sure?” You nod your head. “Alright. I’ll go tell Lee and Katie where we’re headed and then we get get out of here.” You smile and George starts walking back inside. “I’ll be back in a flash.”
As George disappears back into the castle, you sigh and look out at the courtyard. It was such a shame. A beautiful night to have a ball, spending a romantic night with someone. It wasn’t that you weren’t having fun with George, because George was always fun to be around, it was just not how you pictured the night going in your head. You pictured yourself to go with someone you fancied, ideally that person was Fred. You imagined that he would have asked you to the ball and you would have danced the night away, ending the night with him asking you to be his. It was a silly daydream though. But still a dream you hoped for none the less.
However, the memory of that night in the common room sat in your stomach like a rock. The feeling of being told that you weren’t what he wanted made you feel ill. You never wanted to feel like a second choice. You wanted someone who wanted you just as badly as you did. But apparently that wasn’t Fred.
“What are you doing out here alone?” 
Without turning around you knew who it was and you wouldn’t dare look at him. Not right now. You had already seen enough of him. “Shouldn’t you be with Angelina?” you snap back, not intending to sound harsh, but the words came out that way regardless of intention.
You start to walk into the courtyard, allowing yourself to become distracting with the beautifully bloomed bouquets of flowers. The sound of Fred’s footsteps follow you into the courtyard as you gulp. “I saw you leave and I wanted to make sure that you were alright,” Fred tells you as you roll your eyes. “You’re still my friend, (Y/N). I care about you.”
With a small sarcastic chuckle, you reply, “Right. Good to know you care about me.”
In the distance, the roll of thunder sounds as you look up at the sky. What was once a clear night sky now becomes cloudy. But instead of retreating to the castle, you walk further into the gardens. Fred allowing himself to do the same. “I know that things have been complicated between us, (Y/N), but that doesn’t mean we can’t work this out. We can still be around each other without feeling awkward,” he tries to reason with you, but you simply keep walking away from him. You hear him groan before running ahead of you so he can look at your face. You abruptly stop when he appears in front of you. “Please, (Y/N). I can’t have you walk out of my life. You mean so much to me.”
You look at Fred’s apologetic face, but you don’t buy an ounce of it. No matter how much you wanted to take his hands in yours and tell him that you forgive him because you love him, you fight agains the urge and speak with a scowl, “You should have thought about that before you went along and kissed me.” Fred sighs and scoffs. “You know how I feel about you, Fred. And you’re choosing to pretend like I didn’t tell you. Do you know how uncomfortable that is?” you ask him genuinely.
Another rumble of thunder sounds as you look up at the sky with a groan, walking away from Fred again and deeper into the garden. But rather than Fred giving up, he follows you, chasing you through the maze of flowers. “How do you think I feel seeing you come here with my twin brother? Laughing and dancing and being around him constantly? You think it doesn’t make me uncomfortable?” he asks.
This makes you stop dead in your tracks and spin around to look at him. “You’re joking, right?” you scoff as Fred just looks at you. You huff out a laugh, bewildered that Fred would go so far to suggest that you had a thing for George. As you rub your hands over your face, you feel a drop from the sky hit your skin. Great. “George and I are friends!” you emphasize as Fred rolls his eyes. “You think I’m so calculating and manipulative that I would go after your twin? After you rejected me?” you spit at him.
“I don’t know what you think, (Y/N)! All I know is that when I see you with my brother it...does something to me. And I don’t know what it is, but I don’t like it,” Fred pulls at the roots of his hair as you frustratedly groan out. It was if the universe was feeling the same way; another rumble of thunder sounds as more droplets start falling from the dark sky.
You take a daring step towards Fred and say, “Well, I can’t help that your ego is so fragile that you get jealous that I’m having a good time with someone who isn’t you.” Fred rolls his eyes and runs hand over his mouth, shaking his head. You couldn’t believe that the two of you were having this conversation. With a burst of confidence, you yell, “Because you know what, Fred! I can’t keep pining over you! It makes me miserable! I’ve been doing it for so long and it’s exhausting. I can’t keep living like this, it makes me infuriated with myself. And now that I know that I have no chance with you, it’s pointless!” Fred runs his fingers through his hair and opens up his mouth to say something, but you cut him off, “But that night you kissed me...you made me think that we had a chance. A real chance. But it was all a lie, huh, Fred? You just wanted to take me out on a test drive before you committed to me.”
Your words make Fred’s heart sting and it’s evident by the look on his face. Your words were harsh, but it’s what Fred needed to hear. He was trying to string you along still when you didn’t want to be. And that’s when he explodes, throwing his hands in the air, surrendering, “I didn’t mean to kiss you that night in the common room! It was an honest mistake, heat of the moment! You weren’t a test drive, (Y/N)! Who do you think I am?!” he exclaims as you just shake your head. “I didn’t know you liked me! If I had known-”
“If you had known, you what? You would have found out eventually. And what were you going to do? String me along like some lovesick puppy?!” you exclaim, the lump in your throat rising as the rain starts to fall faster. The rain dampens your hair and the silk of your dress starts to absorb it. “Regardless if you knew I liked you or not, you still kissed me, Fred, and you can’t take that back! You kissed me! But instead of facing the problem as what it is, you’ve distracted yourself with someone new,” you protest as you allow the lump in your throat to burst as tears start to fall down your face, mixing with the fresh rain.
“That’s not fair to say,” Fred shakes his head, taking a step closer to you.
“No, what’s not fair is you being mad that I’m trying to move on!” you exclaim now, speaking through your tears, pushing Fred’s damp chest. He stumbles back at you continue, “What’s not fair is you telling me I can’t do what is best for me! What’s not fair is that no matter how much you hurt me or reject me or surround yourself with other women, I’ll still be head over heels for you, Fred Weasley! I’ll still want you even though you don’t want me! I’ll still be hopelessly devoted to you!” you confess with a sob, turning away from him, covering your face with your arms as you inhale shakily.
Fred doesn’t dare move a step closer to you. Instead, he stands there, listening to the rain pour down, hitting the tender Earth, the wetness absorbing into his fresh pressed suit. “What...do you mean?” he asks, genuinely confused.
With an exasperated laugh, you yell out, “I’m a fool! I’m a fool whose willing to sit around and wait for you!” pulling on the roots of your hair, you vomit everything you’ve been holding in. “I’m out of my fucking head, Fred! My mind is screaming to forget about you and move on, but my heart is telling me to not let go of you! You’ve pushed me aside! Completely! And I don’t know what to do! There’s nothing left for me to do!” you scream out in the pouring rain, the two of you completely soaked standing in the garden. Your chest is heaving in the rain as you just stare at Fred who looks at you, so sad and so torn up. But he is silent. For the first time in a long time, Fred Weasley is speechless.
In a more calm voice, you speak out in the garden over the rain, “I will always be foolishly and hopelessly devoted to you. And I’m sorry. So if I can’t let you go, you’ll have to be the one to do it.” Fred is still silent as you scoff, knowing that he can’t find the words he wants to say. He just stands there in the rain, hands in his pockets as you shake your head, pushing past him, through the garden to get back to the castle. 
“(Y/N)!” he calls out as you ignore him, only picking up your pace as you run out of the courtyard and back into the castle. “(Y/N)!”
As you enter the castle, you see George who looks at you confused as to why you were suddenly drenched, but the rumble of thunder behind you answers his question. But that didn’t answer why you were crying. And then Fred runs into the castle, also completely drenched, and George puts together the puzzle pieces. Katie, who stands next to George, gives you a sad look before speaking, “Let’s get you dry.” You run into Katie’s arm, crying as she rubs your back and guides you up the stairs to get back to the common room.
George just stands there, looking at his twin, shaking his head. Fred looks at his twin, not knowing what to do now. Does he chase after you? Does he take care of you? But next to George stands Angelina who looks at him completely confused. Fred sighs, knowing that he’s really gotten himself into trouble. And there was no easy escape out of it. 
Back in the common room, you have changed into cozy pajamas and are adorned with a fuzzy blanket as the fire roars, warming you up from the freezing rain. Katie sits next to you, rubbing your back as you rested your head on her shoulder. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. We can just sit here, have a drink, and listen to all the music you want,” she speaks as you nod against her shoulder. Lee hands Katie a cup to which she hands to you as you take a small sip of. 
Lee turns on the boom box in the corner, gently switching through songs before the intro to Dancing Queen starts playing. The sound makes you sit up straight, reminding you of that same damned night as you speak up, “Change the song.” Lee gives you a confused look before switching the song to something different.
Katie gives you a puzzled look as you pull the blanket around you tighter. “I thought you loved that song.”
“Not anymore,” you sigh. “He ruined that too.”
-------------------
The days had gone by slowly but surely. Each day you separated yourself more and more from Fred and tried to keep interactions limited. But it was all difficult since seeing George meant seeing Fred. No matter what though, you knew that Katie and Alicia had your back, giving your hand a squeeze under the table at the Great Hall as he walked in with George. 
Even though you knew the chances of you and Fred ever happening were down the toilet, you couldn’t help the fact that your heart still fluttered at the sight of him. Your stomach still did somersaults at the mention of his name. When you saw his silhouette in the hall, your heart raced with excitement and anticipation. But you couldn’t let yourself give into him. 
You sat in your room one night, writing in your journal, keeping yourself busy as Alicia rose from her bed and put on her shoes. “I’m going to head down to the common room to meet up with Katie. We’re gonna study in the library. You wanna come?” she asks with a smile. 
“I think I’m going to stay in. Thanks though,” you tell her before she slips out of the room. The door closes behind her as you shut your journal and huff, resting your arms on your shoulders. 
Rising from the bed, you look out of your window and look at the beautiful Scottish scenery that was slowly being covered in snow. It was gorgeous, the green grass being covered in powdery white snow that shimmered in the late afternoon sun as it set in the horizon. You smiled to yourself softly as you watched the snow fall from the sky. 
It brought you back one of the days it snowed three years ago. George had pounded on your door to put on snow shoes and your jacket. He insisted it was packing snow, perfect snow for a snowball fight. Of course, you had gotten ready in a flash, you, the twins, Katie, and Alicia all running outside of the castle to hurl snowballs at each other, laughing and squealing as the cold snow hit your skin. You remember Fred sneaking up behind you and dumping a chunk of snow down your shirt as you yelped out before smacking him with a snowball as he cackled. With a sneaky smile, you jumped on his back and did the same, shoving a snowball down his shirt as he yelled out, the cold snow melting against his warm skin. “Oh, you’ll pay for this one, (Y/L/N),” he called as you ran away from him with a giggle.
The memory made you smile, but was soon interrupted by the sound of pulsating music coming from what sounded like the common room. “What the hell?” you whisper to yourself as you slowly start to register the music as ABBA. “Good Godric,” you huff as you realize that Dancing Queen is the song being blared from the common room. You angrily slip on a pair of trainers before opening the door and making your way down the stairs. “Ever hear of the silencing spell?” you grumble.
As you descend the stairs, you start to call out, “Oi! Some people are trying to study! Would you knock it off?” 
But as you reach the bottom of the stairs, you stop in your tracks as Fred stands in the middle of the common room, the boom box blaring ABBA, in his hands, a hand picked bouquet of the flowers from the courtyard. The same ones from the Yule Ball. Your eyes meet Fred’s as he turns off the boom box. “Fred,” you speak quietly.
“Hey,” he smiles at you. “I, um, I want to make a grand romantic gesture like they do in those muggle movies. I don’t know how successful the execution was. But it’s the thought that counts, right?” he gives a shaky laugh as you gulp, looking at him puzzled as to what this all was. Fred inhales shakily before speaking, “Angelina and I are over.” Your eyes widen and your heart stops. “Look, (Y/N). I haven’t been able to sleep since the Yule Ball. And I know that what I said to you that night was so uncalled for and so childish and stupid of me and I will forever be sorry for it. But what you said. About being hopelessly devoted to me. That keeps playing in my head on repeat.” You fold your arms across your chest and awkwardly shift your balance, trying to stay calm at his words. “And you said, since you can’t get over me, that I’ll have to do it. But truth is, (Y/N), there is no getting over you,” he sighs with a hopeful smile as you look up at him, heart beating against your rib cage. “I’m not letting go of you. I’m holding onto the very end of it all because you’re the one that I want. I want you and you only. And it took almost losing you to realize that. And I’m a dickhead for not realizing it earlier, but I’m just hoping that there is a part of you that still wants me,” he tells you as you look at his trembling hands, a small smile forming on your face. 
You walk towards him slowly until you are face to face with Fred, looking into his worried, but hopeful eyes. You smile and pluck the bouquet from his hands as he lets out a breathy chuckle. “Nice flowers, Weasley,” you tease him as he smiles. 
Fred puts one hand on your hip, pulling you close to him as he cups your cheek with the other hand. “I’m not saying we need to dive into things right now, if you want to take things slowly, then I’m more than happy to do that,” he tells you as you sigh. “I want to prove to you that I will be completely devoted to you, angel. I want to prove that I’m not going anywhere. I can’t hide it anymore. I am devoted to you.”
A goofy grin appears on your face as you give into Fred’s touch with a sigh. “Freddie, I do want to take things one day at a time,” you tell him as he shakes his head, still overjoyed at the thought that you would still have him. A small giggle escapes your lips. “You are quite adorable when you’re excited,” you tell him as he rolls his eyes. “I’m out of my head for you, Weasley.”
Fred pulls you impossibly closer to him as he sighs, “I’m head over heels for you, my darling.” And slowly, Fred presses his lips against yours as you melt into his touch. For once, things felt right.
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lady-z-writes · 3 years
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Got this idea after listening to a cringey song with the lyrics, "There ain't really no such thing as gin and platonic."
Soooo here you go?
Heisenberg x fem!reader get tipsy and end up fooling around, much to Dimitrescu's dismay...considering it's a dinner party at her castle...
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A laugh sounds down the hall at Lady Dimitrescu's and the tall woman is cringing. Of course Mother Miranda offered up her castle to host yet another family dinner. Of course she's the one who insisted on having you here.
It's not that she has anything against you, no, it's just that she knows how things are between you and Heisenberg; knows the almost-friendship that started bubbling into an almost uncomfortable situation.
You're from the neighboring village, yes, but Miranda considers you one of her own. So, naturally, Lady Dimitrescu has to treat you as such.
Heisenberg on the other hand goes above and beyond his fake family duties.
He's downright flirting with you.
They were almost tempted to take away the drinks, but it almost seems like an experiment for Miranda - like she wants the two of you to get together just to see what happens.
He'd found the gin and - fuck - did he love the flirty way about you when you drank hard liquor.
The bedroom eyes and the lip biting and the laughter - it's downright distracting - thank God the party mostly ended with Moreau spilling the wine cart over.
Now it's just you, him, and his 'sister' cussing up a storm in an upstairs room.
Maids are on their hands and knees scrubbing the carpet nearby, trying to lift the stain before it sets.
Heisenberg rambles on about a new tool he's tinkering with. You're trying to follow his conversation, but you really don't understand much of what he's talking about. Not to mention, he's got a few buttons undone and you're staring at the peek of skin, the chest hair. Your fingers grip around your glass, trying to hold back the urges stirring inside you.
"Too snowy out there to leave this late..." he grumbles, looking down the hall. "Hate to say it, but we may have to stay..."
You know how much he detests this life; how much he can't stand Mother Miranda, how he dislikes Alcina. Merely having him suggest staying means he's probably feeling his drinks.
"Plenty of room," you hum, nodding, sipping your drink.
"Oh. I was suggesting we bunk together."
You almost choke on your next sip. The cheeky smirk he's sending you is alluring - the way he leans forward, elbows on his knees, glass once again empty.
"Now, Karl, that's completely against house rules, I'm sure," you lower your gaze to his lips.
His glasses and hat are off, jacket tossed over the back of the couch, shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He looks so tempting like this and the way he's looking at you makes you want to do something about it.
"Oh? And what'll you do? Punish me?" he sets the glass down beside the bottle of gin, leans back against the couch, a cocky look on his face.
You take the opportunity to close the distance between the two of you; his open body posture providing space for you to straddle his lap. You don't know who pulls the other in for a kiss, but before you know it, he's snaking his hands around your glass, putting it on the end-table mid-kiss, and your back's to the cushion. He's tracing kisses down your neck, nipping at your collarbone, facial hair stinging your skin.
His large hand grips around your neck as he comes back up to kiss you.
A clearing of a throat and you both pause, glancing toward the noise. The three maids are there, staring wide-eyed at the scene.
Heisenberg chuckles, "Sorry," he nods, points down the hall, "Room?"
They nod back at him and don't break gaze until the two of you are up out of the room.
The goal is to find a room before Alcina comes back down, but the two of you end up stumbling down the hall, laughing, groping each other, being way too loud to not be caught.
Heisenberg's got you atop a hall table when you hear someone down the corridor. He slowly removes his hands from under your dress, lifts his gaze to see who's approaching.
Cassandra Dimitrescu's giggle echoes down the hall.
"The two of you play nice together, now," she teases with a wink, continuing on. "Especially on Mother's expensive heirlooms."
Heisenberg huffs a laugh, "Noted," he tips his head as she passes by. When she's out of earshot, he growls at you, "If you aren't naked in one of these rooms in the next two minutes I'll edge you all night."
As soon as you're back on solid ground, you take off in a sprint down the hallway, Heisenberg chasing after you. Opening and closing doors, you stumble through the threshold of a dimly lit room - a large bed greets you.
"I'm gonna count to ten," he urges you forward, closes and locks the door behind you. "and you better be naked on that bed for me, hm?"
You nod.
"One...two, three, four..." you're rushing to shove your dress off your body, to step out of your shoes. "Five, six, seven," nearly tripping on your shoes, you squeak out an alarmed sound. "Eight, nine..." when you're on the bed he looks pleased. "Ten," he growls. "Back on the pillow, sweetness, give me some room."
You follow instructions only to watch him flop down on his belly, spread your legs, and plant his face between your thighs.
It makes his dick twitch: the way your back arches off the bed, the sharp inhale, the way your thighs clamp on either side of his head...and your taste.
Karl takes his time learning just what makes you whine. He's a big fan of oral - of leading up to the main event - of getting a good sense of his partner's body before he dives in, cock-first. He's always been about the theatrics.
He can feel his hard cock pressing against the bed as his hands slip under your ass to hoist you up just a little more for better leverage. He's got you gasping and gripping at him, arching your back, rocking against his wonderful mouth.
He needs stimulation.
It's getting so bad, he starts grinding against the bedsheets just to get some relief.
The orgasm takes you a little longer than he expected, but he wonders if the booze had anything to do with that. The moment you're cumming against him, you grip his hair and ride it out.
Karl lays down, motions you over when you're coming down from your orgasm. You expect him to have you take out his cock, but when he tells you to sit on his face you almost protest.
"Now."
You do.
Heisenberg is a fan of overstimulating his partner, just to play with them, just to remind them who's in charge at the moment. The weight of you on his face, the soft thighs he caresses with open palms, the wetness covering his face...it's too much.
"Take my cock out," he groans.
You do as you're told. He's big - bigger than you pictured - and you can't help but put your mouth on him. It startles him at first, you think he figured you'd just fuck him, but the noises he makes as you deep throat him...the little bucks of his hips, the way he grips your hair and demands what speed you go...?
You're enjoying this all too much.
"F-fuck, gonna cum if you keep that up." He's panting, tapping your chin to get you to stop.
A few more swirls of your tongue and he's pulling his hips back completely. When you pop your mouth off him, you hover your body over his, watch his chest rise and fall as he rubs a hand down his face and gasps.
He likes the look of you with your swollen lips, your pupils dilated. You look wild.
Without much effort, you shift on top of him, slide his dick inside of you. You're startled when his hands grip into your thighs, almost bruising.
"Just relax, big boy..." you hum, rocking your hips on him. He'd seemed like he wanted to take control until he felt your movements. "There you go, good..."
You pull your hips back completely, slipping his cock almost out of you before slamming back down. You adjust to have better control of your thrusting on top of him.
His fingers dig into your skin. "Fuck, fuck, wait..."
You shake your head, "Uh uh, I'm close."
"God damn it, woman, let me cum on your belly. Fuck, let me cum on your belly."
The thrill you feel from his demands sends you into another climax and you ride it out, not stopping even when he warns you that he's close.
The speed at which you're riding him is causing him to struggle to hold back. Several times in this little hookup he's been teetering on the edge of orgasm, but feeling your soft walls fluttering around his dick like that, knowing that he caused your pleasure?
He easily overpowers you, flips you on your back, and pounds into you.
His whole intention was to pull out, pump his fist around his overly sensitive cock, and shoot his load on your belly. But when you thrust up against him, whining and begging to be filled, he chokes.
"W-where do you want it?" he just wants to hear it again.
"In me, Karl, please? Fuck, just fill me." This is followed by whispers of 'I just want to be yours' and he's so fucking passed the point of no return it's not even funny.
He bottoms out, balls tight, breaths coming out in gasps as he watches your tits bounce with each thrust. Fuck, he's done for. Fuck, he needed this...
His vision goes white when he climaxes and he's humming your name like a thank you. The way you're gripping him while he cums makes him very aware that he's glad you're milking him for all he's got.
A shiver runs through him before he collapses down on you, holding himself up on his forearms so he doesn't crush you.
His dick's still hard.
He's pressing his forehead to your chest and huffing out gasps.
You're snowed in anyway, you figure; may as well spend the night doing something productive.
"I don't think I've got another one in me," you kiss him softly, run your fingers through his hair.
"We'll just have to see about that," he replies. "Didn't know you were a freak." You try to hide your face, but he lifts your chin and kisses you deeply. "Night's still young. I'm determined to cum on your belly before we're through."
"Deal," you laugh to which he quirks an eyebrow at you. "Guess there really isn't such thing as gin and platonic."
The half-lidded gaze, the humorless expression...maybe you should have kept that last bit to yourself.
"Think you're so fucking clever, girl? Cute."
"You gonna heckle me or fuck me?"
He picks up the pace with a 'why not both?' and you buckle in for a long night.
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driver’s license ~ machine gun kelly
word count: 2520
request?: no
description: in which a new song reminds her too much of her ex, and leads them to reconnect
pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader
warnings: swearing, angst, sadness
based on this song (of course)
masterlist
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Who knew that a song by a 17 year old could cause so much hurt to be brought back for me? Not to bash 17 year olds or anything, but when I was 17 I could never write something so heartbreakingly beautiful.
I was on my way home from work when the song came on the radio for the first time. I was captivated by the lyrics immediately and found myself having to pull over because I couldn’t stop crying. It took a solid five minutes and having to play my happy playlist on Spotify before I finally felt okay enough to get home, however the minute I got in through the door I found the song on Spotify and listened to it all night.
The lyrics connected with me in a way that a song hadn’t in years, and the pain in the singer’s voice opened up fresh wounds that I had thought were long closed.
She's so much older than me She's everything I'm insecure about
Of course he ended up with her. Even if he hadn’t actually left me for her, he always told me there was nothing between them besides on screen chemistry. And now they were dating and supposedly “so in love”.
And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me 'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street
He wrote so many songs about me. He played every one of them for me after writing and recording them, just to get my approval and my okay to put them out. They were beautiful songs - songs in which he promised forever. He’d always said he was going to marry me one day, make me the mother of his future kids. His “forever girl”.
Can't drive past the places we used to go to 'Cause I still fucking love you, babe
God...did I ever still love him.
Our relationship didn’t get a proper closure. At least, not on my end. It all happened so fast. He came home after a long tour and was silent the whole night. He didn’t even try to make love to me the way he always did after being away from me for so long. The next morning, he told me over breakfast that he had lost feelings for me. He asked me to get my things and take them back to the apartment I still had despite basically living out of his home. Then he left, saying he didn’t want to be there to watch me leave.
After that, it was like he stopped existing. Well, it was like Colson Baker stopped existing. Machine Gun Kelly was everywhere, especially after announcing his new relationship with Megan Fox, in which he made sure to post pictures and videos with her basically every week. But the Colson I knew and loved stopped existing. He blocked me on everything, even my phone number. He didn’t reach out to me, neither did Casie. I figured the latter was because her father told her not to, which almost hurt more than the breakup did. I loved Casie like my own daughter, and I loved Colson more than anything. And in the span of 12 hours, I lost both of them.
I credited that non-closure to the reason I had such a hard time moving on, even after being broken up almost a year. I really thought I was okay, until I heard fucking Olivia Rodrigo singing about her own heartbreak, and it made me remember mine was still fresh.
On one day that my thoughts were becoming too dark to bare on my own, I decided to go out for a drive to clear my head. I turned on the song, just to make myself more depressed I guess. I wasn’t really paying attention to the road (not good, I know) and, I guess by some muscle memory, I found myself driving down Colson’s street. I hadn’t realized where I was until I saw his familiar house, which his familiar car in the driveway...and his familiar tall frame getting out of it.
My breath caught in my throat and I was sure I was about to crash the car. I looked at him for a little too long, every good memory we ever had rushing back in that moment. He was looking down at his keys as he bumped the car door shut with his hip. I wondered if Megan was in the house waiting for him, and found that that thought hurt me more than actually seeing him.
I saw his head lifting, looking in my direction, for a split second before my eyes darted back to the road. I hoped he couldn’t see me in the driver’s seat, or that he didn’t see me looking at him. I hoped he just thought I was a random car passing through the neighborhood. If he couldn’t see that it was specifically me driving, there was no way he’d know it was my car. There were too many cars like it.
My heart was racing and I could feel tears welling up in my eyes again. I knew I had to pull over, but I was still too close to his house to feel comfortable stopping. I blinked my tears away and continued driving, trying to steady my heartbeat as I drove to the coffee shop just at the end of his road. The one we always used to go to.
I got out and went inside, hoping that getting something to eat and drink would help me to settle down before I drove home. I ordered an iced coffee and a muffin and took it to sit in a booth tucked away in the back of the coffee shop. I was trying to distract myself with my phone when someone approached and spoke.
“Hey.”
My whole body tensed up as I looked up to see - of course - Colson stood over me.
“Hey,” I said. I cringed at how hoarse my voice sounded. God, pull it together (Y/N).
“I thought that was you driving past my place,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets awkwardly.
“Yeah, sorry,” I said, trying to come up with some excuse on the spot as to why I was in the neighborhood. “I haven’t been to this place in so long and found myself craving some coffee. I guess...it was just muscle memory to come through your way to get here.”
“Don’t apologize,” he said. “I...I actually got a little excited. I thought...I thought maybe you were coming over for a second. I forgot...”
His voice trailed away.
How could he forget we broke up when he was the one who dumped me? And he was the one who moved on soo effortlessly?
“Can I sit?” he asked.
I shrugged in response. “Free country.”
He chuckled at my joke, and my heart did an involuntary flip. God, I missed that laugh.
He sat across from me in the booth and looked down at his hands. I stared down at the food in front of me, suddenly feeling too queasy to eat. Instead, I took another sip of my iced coffee.
“How have you been?” he asked.
The questioned annoyed me.
How have I been?! Well, let’s see: you absolutely shattered my heart, went MIA on me and took your daughter with you, started seeing the much older, much prettier actress that you told me you had no feelings for and decided to rub it in my face through social media, all while I have been so broken for nearly a year that I constantly have friends and family checking in on me to make sure I’m still alive. How the fuck do you think I’ve been?!
I decided not to respond that way though, even though I was aching to make him feel bad for what he did to me. I knew it was the smarter option to try and be the bigger person in this situation.
“I’ve been okay,” I responded, trying to be as vague as possible. “Not too much as happened really. Still...same old me.”
I didn’t ask him how he was, because I already knew. He knew that I knew, because how could I not? His face was plastered everywhere, usually sucking on Megan’s face as well.
“It’s cool to see you,” he said instead. “I...It’s been too long.”
“Well, it tends to be hard to communicate when you block someone on everything overnight.”
I quickly took a sip of my iced coffee, almost wishing that would put the words back in my mouth.
Colson winced. “Yeah, that was...that was wrong of me. I...I’m sorry.”
“Why the fuck are you here, Colson?” I finally snapped. So much for being the bigger person. “Couldn’t you have just watched me drive past in peace? Did you have to follow me?”
“I felt like I had to,” he said. “I wanted...I wanted to know I hadn’t just seen you this time like all the other times I saw a car that looked like yours. I had to know if it was actually you this time. And I...I had to see you in person again.”
“You could’ve called at any time,” I reminded him. “Or messaged on social media, or even just texted. You could’ve even sent a fucking letter, Colson! If you wanted to see me that bad, you had ways of reaching out. You decided not to, you decided that the break up meant I was non-existent to you anymore.”
“I know!” he snapped back, his hand hitting the table and causing the contents on it to rattle. All eyes in the coffee shop were staring at us for a brief moment before going back to what they were doing. “I fucking know, and it was the worst fucking mistake I’ve ever made. I’m so sorry, (Y/N), I was a complete idiot.”
“Sorry means nothing to me, Colson,” I told him. “Sorry doesn’t undo the year of heartbreak and agony you put me through. Sorry doesn’t undo the fact that you left me for six months to go on tour, that you texted and called me every morning and every night to tell me how much you loved me and how you couldn’t wait to see me again, even on the night before you came home, only to do a complete 180 the moment you got off the plane. It doesn’t excuse the fact that you told me to take my shit and leave the place I had considered a home for two years because you were ending the five year relationship that you claimed to be so deeply in love with. And it especially doesn’t excuse the fact that mere months after the break up you were all over Megan fucking Fox!”
He was silent for a long time. His eyes were becoming moist with tears, and I could feel a lump growing in my own throat. But I couldn’t break. I refused to do so. Not in front of him, not right now.
“I’m such a fucking idiot,” he finally breathed, his voice cracking slightly. “You have to know how much I truly do fucking love you, (Y/N). That never went away. It’s still there, you’re still my forever girl in my heart. But when I came home from tour...my manager called me as I was boarding the flight and told me that there was a plan in motion to get promo for the new album and for the movie with Megan. They wanted Megan and I to date for PR, to be all lovey dovey in front of the cameras and to gush over one another constantly. I reminded him about you and he told me I had to break up with you. He gave me no option, he said either I did that or I was being dropped from the label. No album, no movie, no...no nothing. Just the loser who was still being referred to as the idiot who got his career destroyed by Eminem.”
It was a shocking revelation. I had known Colson’s manager, he seemed like such a nice guy. He didn’t seem like the type to give those kinds of ultimatums. But there was that saying about a wolf in sheep’s clothing...
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked.
“It was easier to make you think I just wasn’t in love anymore,” he said. “I didn’t want you to think I was choosing my career over you, cause I’d never do that. You meant - you mean - the world to me (Y/N). You’re my everything. I just...all the hard work I was putting into everything, for all of that to go to waste, for everything to flop just because I didn’t want to fake date my co-star. I was afraid of the power my manager held over me so...so I just did it. I went along with the plan. I pretended to be hopelessly in love with Megan when I had no feelings for her at all.”
He reached across the table and took my hands in his. I jumped and thought about pulling away from him, but I couldn’t deny that it felt nice to feel his touch again.
“I love you, (Y/N),” he said. “More than anything, you’re the person I want to be with. That bullshit with Megan, it’s long over. We just haven’t made it known publicly, but it will be announced. I want to try and pick up where things left off with us. I want to have you back in my home - in my arms - preparing to marry you someday. Please, (Y/N), can you please forgive me?”
It was the words I wanted to hear more than anything. I had dreamt about hearing Colson ask to take me back ever since he had broken up with me. At that point in time, I probably would’ve jumped at the chance, too. But this time, I slowly pulled my hands away from his. He looked at me in confusion.
“I can’t,” I told him. “Colson, you really fucking hurt me. You left me with no explanation, not even any closure. I get why you did it, but you have to understand that you telling me now isn’t going to undo a year’s worth of hurt that you put me through. I don’t know if anything will ever undo that at this point.”
I stood from the booth, taking my coffee with me and leaving a heartbroken Colson looking up at me with puppy dog eyes.
“There’s this song I’ve been listening to,” I said. “It’s called Driver’s License. I think it’s the only accurate way to describe how much you hurt me when you broke up with me. I encourage you to listen to it, then you can try to take me back again.”
I turned quickly and left before he could see me cry.
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ohmyasmodeus · 4 years
Text
𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 + 𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘭𝘰 ✩
i miss concerts bro... i’ve been watching the 1975′s and bring me the horizon’s 😭 you know the demon brothers would be so fun to attend concerts with. it’s been so long since my last non-request post, so enjoy ! ♡
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
♡ 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘻𝘦𝘣𝘶𝘣
✧   Beel in a comfortable tank top with his muscles on display, carrying you on his shoulders during a music festival? What more could you want?
✧   It isn’t the festival food that gets to Beel; it’s the overwhelming amount of drinks offered by the vendors. The alcoholic slushies, the sweet drinks that taste like candy but will knock you on your ass as soon as you drink them, the bitter jelly shots that make him cringe and look at you with the biggest puppy eyes— he wants them all! The two of you are absolutely wasted before the day is half over, and he ends up just making out with you in the middle of the crowd as you dance to a set, mumbling about how good your lips taste.
✧   Beel protects you during the different sets, muscling away anyone who gets too close to you. He’s just a sweetheart who always asks you if you’re okay, and carries you on his shoulders if being in the pit gets too much for you. He can easily hold you like that for the rest of the sets, and you’ll feel him jumping about here and there and cheering loudly when the music really gets to him.
✧   Without hesitation, he squares the fuck up with anyone that comes onto you or tries to touch you. Your comfort is Beel’s biggest priority, but when it comes to dealing with girls that flirt with him or try to grind on him in crowds, he ends up running back to you to hide! He can’t deal with the attention at all, nobody can ever hear him above the music and you make him feel safe.
♡ 𝘢𝘴𝘮𝘰𝘥𝘦𝘶𝘴
✧   Before you even get a chance to leave the house, he’s taking a million photos of the both of you in your concert outfits because by god, do you look absolutely delicious. He’s going to be all over you in the car, pressing sweet kisses to your face on the way to the venue because he’s so damn proud to call you his baby. Rest assured, the night will be well documented. Asmo’s Devilgram followers need to know what they’re missing out on!
✧   Asmodeus is the absolute master of throwing it back. He’ll be throwing it back before the band gets halfway through the introductory song, glancing back at you to wink teasingly as he starts grinding. You have to make sure everyone else keeps their hands off him, because you’re just as proud to have him all over you. It’s the best when the both of you dance together, shrieking the lyrics at the top of your lungs.
✧   When he gets into the music, he’s squealing for the artists, clutching your hand as the both of you jump along with the crowd. Asmodeus looks absolutely radiant as the lights filter through the fog, even when he’s holding his phone up to record the concert. It makes you grab his phone to stash it away in your bag, and before he starts to whine, you pull him into a kiss and tell him to focus on being in the moment with you!
✧   The afterparty is an absolute must. Asmo knows everyone important, and he’ll sneak you into the exclusive afterparties to give you a taste of what stardom is like. Even if he usually flits around like the social butterfly that he is, tonight is all about making you feel like a star with the way he kisses you and makes everyone know that you’re his, the way he brings you drinks and makes sure you’re right beside him when everyone starts doing shots because he loves tasting the alcohol off your lips more than drinking it.
♡ 𝘮𝘢𝘮𝘮𝘰𝘯
✧   Mammon is hyped. There’s nothing better than doing one of his favourite things with his favourite human, and the entire time he’ll be clinging to you, screaming to the lyrics of his favourite songs. He shields you in the crowd, putting his jacket over you to make sure you’re comfortable (and because he wants to show off how he looks in his tank top).
✧   The music and atmosphere completely gets rid of his shyness. Mammon isn’t afraid to press himself up against your front even if the pair of you are up at the barricade, grinning like he’s won the lottery before he pulls you in to kiss you hard. It’s dizzying, the combination of Mammon’s cologne, and the feeling of the crowd pulsing around you, pressing the both of you closer against each other.
✧   Drinking. So much drinking, because Mammon definitely knows how to sneak alcohol into a venue. He’s taking swigs before pulling you into a kiss to share. The way he tries to avoid getting in trouble with security makes you clutch at the front of his shirt as the both of you laugh in exhilaration.
✧   During the slow songs, he surprises you with just how romantic he can be. It’s as if a switch got flipped— the way he holds you is so tender, and he runs his hands up and down your sides slowly while singing along, pressing his forehead against yours with a smile. Mammon loves sharing moments like these with you, he absolutely adores having you by his side, and he can’t help but lean in and laugh about how this feels so fucking perfect. God, does he love you.
♡ 𝘭𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯
✧   Levi is the best brother to go for concerts with. Being experienced with his idol’s concerts, the date and preparation for it would be a breeze, although he gets adorably shaky when he remembers that he’s going on a date with you. You’re way more important than any idol of his.
✧   His excitement makes him so adorable. He can’t stop himself from chattering on while you’re waiting in line, and brings plenty of snacks and drinks for you two to gorge yourselves on while cuddling. Levi has a perpetual faint blush when he’s around you, especially when you geek out with him, or sit in his lap while in the queue.
✧   To get you the best spots, he’ll sacrifice himself to help you squeeze into tight spots, though you never let him. Tugging on his hand, you pull him along too. The both of you end up pressed up against each each other in the middle of the crowd, giggling while the lights flash and the beat of the drums makes you bounce together. You two might as well be the only ones in the crowd, nuzzling your faces together before you kiss one of his blushing cheeks with a grin.
✧   Music speaks to Leviathan. It gives him that rush of adrenaline, the chills that go down your arms and make you laugh, and experiencing music like this with you is like nothing he’s ever experienced before. Fuelled by the adrenaline, he gains enough confidence to pull you into a clumsy kiss that has the both of you clutching at each other as your giggles turn into full-chested laughter. It’ll be over before you know it, but the both of you want to stay in this moment forever.
♡ 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘩𝘦𝘨𝘰𝘳
✧   Oh, boy, concerts are just not the environment for him. The sounds, the lights, the way everyone clings to each other in a sweaty, loud mess. But all it takes is one puppy-eyed look from you and his defences are breaking down. Belphie can’t help but agree, as long as he approves of your band of choice and it takes place somewhere lowkey.
✧   You’re disappointed at first— but you definitely can’t feel that way anymore when you end up cuddled into his side in a comfortable loveseat at a dive bar. The music stays mellow but the crowd is as upbeat as ever, and you can’t care less about not being able to see the band through the crowd. Not when Belphegor pulls you close and guides you to rest your head on his chest.
✧   As mellow as the music is, it’s intoxicating, and so is Belphie. You spend your time making out slowly while the night passes, tasting the alcohol on his tongue as he combs a hand through your hair. You don’t know if it’s the smoke in the air or Belphie’s hands in your hair that make your mind hazy, but either way, you want the moment to last forever. You’re basically putty in his hands, and it makes him smirk lazily as he boops your nose and teases you about being so needy, and out in front of everyone, no less. Are you trying to stake your claim?
✧   Though it’s in his nature to be lazy, you can’t help but pull Belphie up to dance at least once. He gives in without much of a fight, the corners of his lips slightly upturned as he watches you dance along to the music. He’s joining in easily, resting his hands on your hips to grind against you slowly. He can’t help but eventually spin you around to kiss your forehead and mumble that he thinks he’s found his new favourite thing.
♡ 𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘢𝘯
✧   You’d think that he’s the kind to be hesitant about attending concerts since he’s such a bookish guy, with the packed venue and the blinding lights and the sweaty crowd— but Satan fucking loves concerts. He loves screaming the lyrics and being able to shove his way through the mosh pit. Although, he has to admit that it’s a double edged sword. The aspects of concerts that he loves can irritate him as well, he abhors having people shriek in his ear or push him around.
✧   Music is another form of poetry for him, heaven in the form of passionate lyrics and the pure energy of the people around him. He never tells anyone though. He never thought he would, until you came along.
✧   The first time you attend a concert with him, he tries to tone himself down. That is, until you notice his energy and tug at his hand to encourage him to scream along to the lyrics with you. He’s losing himself in the music, tugging you close, heart racing because you just get him. You encourage him, you see him for who he truly is, and he couldn’t be more in love with you or this moment.
✧   Throw it back. Just throw it back, it doesn’t matter what music you two are dancing to because it has Satan going crazy for you. He presses himself up against your back as you straighten up, hands firm on your hips as he whispers in your ear about how irresistible you are. If you’re not careful, he might end up sneaking you out of the concert venue, eager to use his pent up energy elsewhere with you.
♡ 𝘭𝘶𝘤𝘪𝘧𝘦𝘳
✧   Like Belphie, Lucifer isn’t a fan of concerts or the environment it creates. Being an appreciator of the arts, he mostly attends orchestral performances and operas, so you take it as a great opportunity to open his mind to a side of music that he hasn’t experienced before! Like with most things, it takes a few kisses to coax him into agreement.
✧   He can’t complain when he ends up settled into luxurious seats with you in The Fall. He chuckles to himself as the band starts to play, shaking his head before kissing you and saying that it’s like you know him better than he does himself. The comfortable atmosphere makes Lucifer relax much more than usual, and as cordial as he is with affection in public, he can’t help but put an arm around the back of your seat and lean into you.
✧   Throughout the night, you catch Lucifer gazing at you from time to time. As much as he enjoys the music and the way the set’s lighting makes you look almost ethereal… he’s much more focused on admiring the way your wine-stained lips look as you smile. Full of dark desire, Lucifer’s crimson gaze makes your breath hitch in your throat as you lean into him. Whether you decide to tease him about it is up to you.
✧   When you finally manage to drag him out to dance with the crowd, instead of carrying you on his shoulders, he makes you wrap your legs around his waist while he carries you up, laughing as he looks up at you and marvels at how gorgeous you look. Without hesitation, you lean down to capture his lips in a kiss. Even Lucifer can’t escape the high spirits of the people around you, and the electrifying rush of adrenaline of being here, making memories with the person his heart belongs to.
♡ 𝙙𝙞𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙡𝙤
✧   Diavolo honestly doesn’t have much free time to have fun, so he’s absolutely delighted at the idea of a concert. He’s immediately struck by thoughts of how romantic he could make it, and spends his time daydreaming about hoisting you on his shoulders and spinning you around when he’s meant to be doing work. He looks forward to it so much, seeing you again is always the thing he’s looking forward to the most at any given time. He’s totally the kind of person to try and predict the setlist and listen to all the songs to make sure he can sing along during the performance.
✧   Even if he has the money for seated tickets, Diavolo wants to be in the pit. He wants to be able to dance with you, hoisting you onto his shoulders as the both of you sway to the music. Diavolo is one first starting different cheers, and everyone seems to follow along naturally. It makes you laugh and kiss his head, because even in a concert, the prince of hell itself is still so natural at leading.
✧   Being at a concert with you is the most free he’s felt in thousands of years. It makes him completely forget about his title, laughing with you as he drags you to the front barricade to get the best view and scream to the band, carrying you no matter if it’s against the venue rules. If Diavolo is going to let his hair down, he might as well go big or go home. He wonders just how many stupid stunts he can get away with helping you pull. He helps you stand on the barricade, letting you scream your heart out, because he adores you with his whole heart.
✧   By the end of the night, the both of you are running from security with your ten solo cups stacked into one another, buzzing from the mix of adrenaline and alcohol. The stupid grin Diavolo has on his face as he scoops you up while you run makes you shriek with laughter, and he’ll hide you away in a quiet alley, silencing you with a kiss.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
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