Lucifer: What are you writing?
MC: Diavolo wants to know what kind of dangerous weapons we have in the house. I’m letting him know it’s private information
Satan, looking over MC’s shoulder: This just says ‘fuck around and find out’ in calligraphy.
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Mammon: [has another bad and dangerous idea]
Lucifer, waking up in cold sweat: something is wrong.
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MC: May I sit there?
Lucifer: That's my lap.
MC: That doesn't answer my question
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Luke: Simeon, am I ugly?
Simeon: What nonsense! I'm looking at you right now, you're the most beautiful angel in the world!
*meanwhile*
Mammon: Lucifer, am I ugly?
Lucifer: Very much.
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Lucifer: Say one more word I dare you
Mammon: ”One More Word”
Lucifer: ...
MC, whispering to Solomon: Should we run?
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MC: I want to wake up with you everyday for the rest of our lives
Lucifer: I wake up at 4:30 AM
MC:...
MC: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives.
Source: I’m not sure, tumblr probably
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Lucifer: Where are you going?
Satan: To get ice cream or commit a felony. I’ll decide in the car
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Satan and Belphie: We can explain.
Lucifer: Can you?
Satan: If you give us thirty seconds to think of a lie, yes.
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Asmo: What is the hardest thing to say?
Belphie: I was wrong.
Lucifer: I need help.
Mammon: Worcestershire sauce
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Asmo: You can’t rush perfection
Lucifer: I’m not rushing perfection, I’m rushing you
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Lucifer: Satan, why were you up yesterday until 3 am?
Satan: Wait, how did you know I was up until 3 am?
Belphie: We could hear you clapping to the FRIENDS intro every 25 minutes.
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MC: Wow, are you two twins?
Lucifer: Oh certainly not, he's just my stunt double.
Satan: HEY-
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Lucifer: good morning
Belphie: good morning
Levi: good morning
Satan: you all sound like robots, why don't you spice it up a bit?
Mammon: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS-
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Lucifer: Must you always attack me with your words, Satan?
Satan: Should I use rocks instead?
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[On a mountain hike]
Satan: It’s beautiful out here.
Asmo: And quiet.
Lucifer: Too quiet.
Levi: Did we lose someone?
[cut to Beel with a bear in a headlock]
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Lucifer: [sigh]
Lucifer: anyone care to explain why levi is laying on the floor here?
Asmo: he's a little overwhelmed
Lucifer: because?
Asmo: mc smiled at him a few minutes ago
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