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#love spoiling a book that came out like 5 years ago but when it comes to new releases i'm like -_- do i or don't i
babybluebex · 2 years
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STOP! HAMMER (what if you wrote something about actor reader kissing joe on the check during the premiere when someone asks what their relationship is like in the new season) TIME!
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"It's been great fun working with this lot," Joseph said into the microphone, gesturing around at the cast all surrounding you. "Coming into a show this late in the game is hard, but everyone was so kind and warm and welcoming, it didn't feel like a chore."
"Y/N, do you feel the same?" the moderator asked, and your heart warmed when you heard a few cheers as Joseph handed you the microphone. Getting booked for a show like Stranger Things was incredible, especially with your character: Amanda, the Girl™ in Hellfire Club. She was so much more than that, though, a fighter and as quick as a whip, and playing her had been a dream come true.
"Yeah, I was really nervous," you chuckled. The stage lights were almost blinding, and you squinted as you gathered your words. "Like Joey said, it's like... It felt like everyone was so excited to have us on board, and that definitely was such a blessing."
You cursed yourself for using your special nickname for Joseph, something only you called him. After filming started two years ago, you and Joseph were quick to become friends, especially with the amount of scenes that Eddie and Amanda had together. You spent more time with him than anybody else, and you knew that the audience would love your chemistry. In those two years, though, a genuine friendship had blossomed between you and Joseph, eventually leading to a confession during filming of episode 9.
Eddie's death had been scripted to be with very few words, just the necessaries, Dustin and Amanda coming to Eddie's rescue just too late, and Amanda tearfully accepting Eddie's pleas to lead the sheep. "I will," the script said, but, on the day, at 5:30 in the morning, covered in more fake blood than you knew what to do with, your emotions got the better of you. Instead of "I will", you said, "I love you". And Joseph, with his quick wit, had replied, "I love you too, princess." After wrap, Joseph came to you, inquiring about the improv, and, by the time he left your trailer, he was your boyfriend.
Joseph was, by nature, very private. He didn't use social media hardly at all, and you had already heard him in interviews saying that he had "friends" who would send him TikToks; you being the friend, laughing at videos of Eddie as you laid on Joseph's chest before bed. It wasn't a surprise to you that he asked to keep your relationship under wraps from the press, and, while it was hard sometimes, the quiet moments with just him were worth it.
"We don't know too much about Amanda or Eddie," the moderator said. "The episodes are going live online tonight, in about three hours; tell us a little bit about Amanda."
"Well," you started. "Where do I start? God. Mandy's the only girl in the Hellfire Club, of which Eddie is the Dungeon Master. She's so fierce and fun, doesn't take anyone's sh... Crap— forgot I can't curse here— and she's just a perfect compliment to Eddie. Dustin and Mike really find a-a sister in Mandy, and I loved being able to be that for them."
"And who is she to Eddie?" the moderator asked, and you caught Joseph smirking out of the corner of your eye.
"To Eddie," you started. "Mandy is his best friend. He's been held back a few times and all, and she's always been there to support him." That was about all you could say without spoiling much of Mandy and Eddie's storyline, and you shrugged.
"And, Joseph, who is Eddie to Mandy?" the moderator asked, and you handed Joseph the mic back with a smile. He looked dashing in his blue pinstripe suit, but you could tell that all of the layers were hot, his forehead dotted with sweat.
"Eddie is..." Joseph began, and he looked back at you curiously. "Eddie is Mandy's best mate. He confides in her, drives her to school, steals her ham sandwiches... Wait, maybe that last one's me and Y/N." A chuckle rose from the crowd, especially Gaten, standing in front of you, obviously remembering the day on set that Joseph had stolen your lunch and only accepted kisses in return for getting it back.
You couldn't help yourself, and you leaned up and pressed a kiss to Joseph's scruffy cheek. You were satisfied with yourself and the puzzled reaction from the crowd, but then you saw a smudge of your red lipstick on his cheek. "Shit," you mumbled to yourself and hastily began to wipe it off, but Joseph jerked his head away.
"Nah, leave it," Joseph laughed, batting your hand away. "Getting kissed by a pretty girl, I want evidence of that. We get that on camera, yeah?"
"I'm so sorry, Joe," you giggled, and he smiled at you.
"I'll get you for that," he said, grinding his teeth in fake-annoyance, and he touched his cheek. Then, away from the microphone, he leaned into you and mumbled, "I'll really get you for that."
"Consider me gotten," you said, and your Joey smiled at you.
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goodboypolly · 5 months
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A long thought about surprise queer representation:
The term ‘“getting ‘EVERY’ed” isn’t something that can just happen in any context.
The thing about the original EVERY is that it was from a completely unrelated multi show promo from Amazon’s Twitter, and no one paid that split second of Good Omens any mind for a good couple of days. Why would there be a Good Omens kiss in a queer kiss compilation for pride month, after all? Then someone actually watched the promo and went ‘wait a fucking second…’
It was out of fucking nowhere. We didn’t see a kiss coming in a million years.
When I first read the book years ago as a teenager, I fell in love with the idea of Aziraphale and Crowley. But it was a book that was finished and we would never get any new content. So I read every fanfiction written.
Then a show was announced. A mini series. A one off. Six episodes to tell the story of the book updated to the modern era. Like most of us who were fans of the book before the show, I was cautious. It could have been a dumpster fire.
And then it just wasn’t. I remember seeing a post way back in 2019 that summed it up perfectly: I knew I was going to like Crowley. I was always going to like Crowley. But I wasn’t expecting to LOVE Aziraphale. (Or something like that).
They were perfect and the extra scenes and watching these amazing actors actually play these characters gave us so much more fuel. The fandom exploded and we were so lucky to have an influx of ridiculously talented writers and artists and cosplayers joining our ranks.
I saw Neil Gaiman give a talk a mere week before the season 2 announcement was made. He is a professional like no other. I was fully fooled by him sadly saying that Good Omens was only going to be one series. He signed my book and was lovely and fully knew the whole time that he was going to change the trajectory of my fucking life the next week.
The announcement came and I lost my shit. This was something that was never going to get any more content. I was happy watching the same episodes over and over again and listening to different versions of the book or flipping through and rereading my favourite bits.
We were getting more content.
I never expected a kiss.
I don’t think any of us did. I thought we were always going to be living in the ‘it’s a love story, we’re just not going to show it or talk about it’ world. I’m used to being told that my existence as a queer person is meant to be kept as subtext.
It was days out from the show that EVERY dropped. Someone I followed on Twitter reposted it so I saw it. And I froze. I genuinely thought it was an edit. I had to tell myself it was an edit or I’d go insane. For the most part we all stayed silent on the subject. We didn’t want to spoil it for people who hadn’t seen it.
But I was going fucking insane. We weren’t getting a kiss there was no way we were getting a kiss.
When the show dropped I was there the first minute to binge the whole series in one go.
EVERY sitting in the back of my mind for the 5 or so hours of episodes.
Episode 6 was happening. I was 10 minutes out from the end. EVERY hadn’t happened. It must have been an edit.
Schrödinger’s EVERY, if you will.
Then it very much wasn’t.
It was real and it still is and I still lose my mind when I remember that it actually happened.
I don’t think anything else will ever feel like this.
For those who never saw it, I present:
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myloveforhergoeson · 4 months
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i'd love to read some good ol' hockey romance novels but idk where to start lol; would you happen to have any recommendations? (it's totally cool if not!!)
YES OMG ok but something you must understand about me is that all of my book recommendations come exclusively from booktok or instagram so please take this with a grain of salt. i like them dumb, stupid, cliche, and smutty!
i am very new to the hockey romance genre, so i only have two books that i have read as of now to recommend, but i've got three on my to be read list so i can talk about those too <3
the one i just finished is called behind the net by stephanie archer and friend... god... i thought this one was just going to be just like pwp but there was plot and it was good and had me actually shocked something so interesting popped up in this book bc i had expected something completely different. it centers around jamie, a hockey player (goalie) for a fake team called the vancouver storm who trades his life playing for a team in new york to move home and take care of his mother after a series of mental health crises. he's a bit mean, a little arrogant, but he is mostly and above all... say it with me... MISUNDERSTOOD. god i eat this shit up. his counterpart is a young woman named pippa who just got out of a pretty one sided (read: slightly emotionally abusive) relationship with the only guy she'd ever dated. her ex is a pretty famous musician and it's her dream to write and record her own album one day, but after the break up and a little bit of a traumatic experience with her ex and his manager, she's not quite sure that's the right choice for her. she's very sweet, determined, and overall someone i found to be a very interesting character. anyway, she ends up as his assistant, chaos ensues, things happen that i won't spoil, but i enjoyed it very much.
(he calls her songbird a lot and though i do not have the claim on the pet name every time he said it my mind immediately went rames rames rames rames like a dog chasing after a squirrel)
i've got a little journal where i keep track of all the books i'm reading and i gave it a 3/5 stars on quality of writing, 5/5 stars on the strength of the characters, and a 4/5 on the plot. and my own extra rating, 4/5 on the spice scale
also! the author is writing a series that includes other members of the team and some minor characters from the first novel! the next one comes out in a few days and i can't wait to pick it up!
the first book i read out of the hockey romance genre is a book called icebreaker by hannah grace - this one was pretty popular when it came out and many people have many opinions on it. here are my own which are very general because i read it almost a year ago
the summary of the book is a little misleading, the main conflict is supposed to revolve around the captain of a fake college hockey team (nate) and a figure skater (anastasia) who's shooting for olympic gold having to share an ice rink after the one the figure skaters use is put out of commission. long story short, anastasia blames nate, but they're put in a bit of a forced proximity situation that lasts like... five chapters max. the rest is them figuring out their feelings for each other yada yada which is fine and i enjoyed but it was not what i thought the book would mainly be about. so, personal warning there lol. this one is a bit closer to pwp, but both of them have goals they want to accomplish and they help each other through that. i liked stassie a lot and found her to be an interesting character - watching her fall for nate was very sweet and i think i would have enjoyed it even more if i really liked him. he was just kind of mid to me with his only two personality traits being rich and team captain. but also, as a college student myself, i liked the atmosphere of the school they attended, the dynamic between stassie and the other players on the team as she slowly got to know them, and the way both nate and stassie worked to better themselves in order to be with each other!
in my journal i gave the quality of writing 3/5, the strength of the characters a 3/5 and the plot a 2/5 (it would have been 4/5 but i HATED the epilogue. if you read this book do not read the epilogue your life will be so much better without it) and my own special 3/5 on the spice scale
this one is also a series involving the other players on the team! the second book came out a few months ago and i'm planning to read it soon. it's been sitting on my shelf for ages.
i would recommend behind the net over icebreaker, but both were enjoyable to me!
on my hockey romance tbr:
the graham effect by elle kennedy
wildfire by hannah grace
the fake out by stephanie archer
but, i am a well-rounded (romance) reader so if you'd like to know my favs or other books im reading or like reviews just lmk... i'm slowly turning this blog into one where i just share whatever i want instead of it being focused toward my story LOL
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alwaysthehbp · 2 years
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A list of my favorite Snily fics, just because
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/6613973/1/The-Long-Road-Home The Long Road Home. This is my all-time favorite (so far). It’s over 800,000 words (nearly the length of the entire HP series) and I read it in the span of 3 weeks. It’s my favorite because it consists of adult Snily that reunite after their falling out in school, it follows events of HP canon very closely during Harry’s school years until the end, it has alive!Regulus who is bffs with Snape, Snape isn’t as miserable as canon because, well, he didn’t cause Lily to die, and women actually are attracted to him. I always love reading a fic when women are attracted to Snape, idk 😂 The fic is very well written and I am not usually a fan of OCs but the author had me caring for everyone in this fic! I shed many tears during emotional moments but it has a happy ending and even a sweet Christmas one shot that takes place after the events in the story. It’s Snily centric of course but to its core it is an ensemble fic and the author handles it very well. I liked reading a Snape that’s in character to a degree but also not completely, hopelessly miserable. I won’t spoil anything but let me just say a certain young character completely captured my heart. This fic has become my canon practically. I wish I had friends to fangirl over it but alas, a tumblr post must suffice. If anyone reads this or has read it, please come to my dms 😂
https://archiveofourown.org/works/716010/chapters/1325814 Obscura Nox Animae was my first ever Snily fic! I was reading HP book 1 for the first time around Aug or Sep 2021 and thought how cool it would be to read from Snape’s POV since he’s written in such a negative light in HP. I came across this fic. Heatherlly has a wonderful way of writing that is hard to come by! I even read one of her SSHG fics because I wanted more of her content, and I am typically 110% SNILY ONLY trash 😂 She seems to always have such original ideas and writes the characters SO well. She can write drama, angst, action, romance, and humor all so well. I always enjoy her works but since this was my first, it’s on my fave list!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/11527821 Vox Severus by Adante825. Oh how I wish this was more than a one shot!! Gods above, let this fic from 2017 become a series PLEASE!!! I just found this one a few days ago as I write this post, and absolutely loved it! I personally prefer fics of adult Snily, like the ones mentioned above, but this one was so, so, so much fun! Severus’s voice changes during his years at Hogwarts and everyone notices. I love a fic where people actually find Sev attractive!!! It’s so fun! And… relatable 😏
https://archiveofourown.org/works/13844247/chapters/31840572 Come Once Again and Love Me by laventadorn packs a hard punch in just 25 chapters. I didn’t think I’d like a fic where Sev dies and comes back to life in the past, especially as a teen with the mind of a 38-year-old, but the author handles that with an interesting twist! I absorbed this fic in a day. I couldn’t put it down!! It’s very well-written and in-character. Definitely in my top 5 and is a must-read for Snily fans!!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/37255837 Show Me Family by @zivitz “SHE DOESN’T EVEN GO HERE” but she did it for me!! My twitter friend from the Kabby fandom posted a while back asking for fic requests. I jokingly requested a Snily fic (knowing she wasn’t in the fandom). Being familiar with the characters and up for the challenge, she to my surprise obliged! And blew my expectations out of the water. This fun, fluffy fic packs a lot of tooth-rotting sweetness in just 647 words. Ziv knows children well, so of course she writes them well! With all the unpredictable and funny things that kids say along the way. I love reading a softer Severus, especially Dad!Sev!! And domestic Snily is always so fun. I love them being comfortable with one another. If you’re a snily shipper, severitus lover, and enjoy reading babyfic, this is a short but absolutely lovely read 💞
https://archiveofourown.org/works/501886/chapters/881306 Essence by VR_Trakowski and the sequel Threshold https://archiveofourown.org/works/550550/chapters/980834 are two very lovely fics about a teenaged Severus who’s too afraid to tell Lily his true feelings, but works tirelessly to create the perfect gift for her. Of course, if it didn’t have a happy ending, it wouldn’t be a fic I would recommend, but I’ll keep these reviews spoiler-free! It’s a really interesting AU and is written so wonderfully! I really like fics that show Snily’s differences but how those differences really help complement each individual. Their love is written very beautifully and sensually, and can bring you to feel emotional as you read! Like many other Snily fics, it does not paint the marauders in a positive light. Be sure to pay attention to TW in the sequel and read at your own discretion! Highly recommend! I actually just finished the series today and am having withdrawals.
That’s all for now!
That being said, I’m always on the lookout for a new Snily fic to read! Like I said, my most favorite is The Long Road Home where Snily are adults, most events of HP canon occur (besides Lily’s death, obvi) and I love a happy, domestic ending for Snily. If anyone has any suggestions for completed fics, especially if they’re similar to those requirements, please send them my way. 😁
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freakinasheet · 9 months
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2023 Thoughts About Things I Finished Roundup
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I had this going on Twitter, but the site is... Like That right now, so I figured it'd be a good idea to mirror and continue it here, as well. I do like the character limit forcing me to keep it brief, so I'll stick with that here too; I'll expand out my impressions when I do my top 10 games list at the end of the year.
The deal is pretty straightforward - quick impressions on stuff that I finished, and recommendations for stuff I found cool - not full reviews. Really handy for me to have a list of stuff I can look back on later, and hopefully you can find something that seems interesting to you, as well. Updated continuously!
1. Good Omens (the book)
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I came in as a Pratchett fan, and this sold me on Gaiman, too! It *feels* like two guys trying to make each other laugh - starts a bit scattered, but comes together excellently by the end.
I haven't seen the show, but I understand why Crowley/Aziraphale became a Thing
2. Kirby's Dream Land 2
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I probably spoiled this for myselg by having played KDL3 first, which did everything this did but better, but it's fun seeing where those ideas started. Some annoying backtracking for 100% and DANG that final boss is a difficulty spike, but a nice, if relatively un-standout, time.
3. Puss in Boots: The Last Wish
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Well, this came out of nowhere, huh? What an unbelievably good movie, way better than it had any right to be
Absolute feast for the eyes (WOW that action), consistently hilarious, and one of the visually coolest depictions of Death put to animation.
4. Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards
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I've tried to start it a few times before, but always dropped it from how slow it felt to play...
After finishing it, I've definitely come around to it - the Dark Matter trilogy isn't my fave style of Kirby, but it does land the fun of experimentation and the charm of the characters nicely!
5. Kaguya-Sama Love is War: Ultra Romantic
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As hilarious and charming as ever, even with the expanding cast!
Just when you think the series is done with schemes and mindgames for a more grounded character study, it hits with a season-long scheme that makes your heart go "YES!" at the end.
6. Kaguya-Sama: First Kiss That Never Ends
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A really great time - largely just a long episode, but one that could easily be a satisfying conclusion for any other romance series!
Just like the rest of Kaguya, it's hilarious, stylish, and heartwarming.
7. Mario + Rabbids: Sparks of Hope
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Kingdom Battle was already a pleasant surprise, but it still shocked me how improved this one was!
The characters all have more unique roles, the new three are a blast, the overworld has so much more to do, and that music! Hugely delightful game, all around.
8. Theatrhythm Final Bar Line
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I'd played a ton of Curtain Call, so I didn't expect much from this, but wow, those new button controls add a surprising amount of complexity and freshness to familiar beatmaps!
It's worrying how addicting it is to play just one more song, then another, then...
9. Metroid Prime Remastered
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It's one of my favourite games of all time, except now it's ridiculously gorgeous (it got the exact same "whoaaa" reaction that the original did out of me, 20 years ago!) and it plays even smoother with the new controls, of COURSE I adored it.
I'm left even more excited for 4!
10. John Wick Chapter 4
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Easily the one John Wick movie where I’ve come out the most impressed by how creative the fight scenes are; the extended overhead shot with the incendiary bullets is maybe one of the most impressive action scenes I’ve ever seen, and that scene at the stairs is also an all-timer for how over-the-top it is. Really great suite of rivals to go against John, too. Very fun movie!
11. Yakuza 5
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Glad I spread this one out over a longer play time than usua. - it's the Like a Dragon series at its' most maximalist.
The writing's laser-focus on 'dreams' was way too on the nose, but I liked seeing this complex plot come together, and it had very strong character moments - it ends in the upper half of the series for sure.
12. The Super Mario Bros Movie
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Yeah! This one was fun! I'm glad the movie that came out on my birthday didn't disappoint.
I really want an extended cut to let a lot of those scenes breathe, but what's there is pretty and charming, and OHH THAT ORIGINAL SCORE WAS SO GOOD... also Jack Black ATE
13. Hi-Fi Rush
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I played this on an underpowered laptop, that liked to randomly slow things down whenever it felt like it, which is really unfortunate for a game that's so reliant on consistent timing.
LUCKILY... this game was so damn good that I didn't care one single bit. This was one of the best, funniest, most creative and charming action games I've ever played, an absolute 10/10 that left me smiling the whole, entire time. Roquefort HAS to go down as one of the best boss fights of the year, holy moly!
Also as a big Mòrag from XC2 liker, Korsica just felt like pandering to me, personally
14. Lego Builder's Journey
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A charming finish-it-in-one sitting game! Its story is simple and wordless, and rendered in these gorgeous brick-built dioramas (with VERY satisfying brick-clicking ASMR sounds) that you can fully interact with! It makes for a pleasant couple of hours.
15: Thud! (Discworld)
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It says how good Pratchett is that this one's still great even when it's a story about fantasy racism that has Vimes overpowering a corrupting evil god through how much of a Good Cop he is.
Vimes moving heaven and earth to read to his son every night unambiguously rules!
16. Mega Man Battle Network
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Finally playing these games I really should have played as a kid! It's good! The first one has a few... really rough levels, but also shows a ton of potential, and that battle system really is a blast... looking forward to seeing how it evolves!
17. The Way of the House Husband (Vol 9)
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Still one of my fave manga out there, and I'm glad to see it evolving beyond its main joke of "looks like Tatsu's doing something scary, but it's mundane" and using its supporting cast better; won't-eat-vegetables girl is a new all-time great bit.
18. Ms. Marvel - Army of One
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Never read Kamala Khan before, so I picked up a random collection, and I immediately see why she's a very endearing character!
This one features melting flesh-bots, a Canadian ninja syndicate, and HYDRA running a gentrification scheme, so it's good fun.
19. Xenoblade Chronicles 3: Future Redeemed
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They ever pulled it off! A satisfying ending to one of the all-time best RPG series!
It's the crazy fanservice ride I was missing from the main game, some of the most refined XC gameplay, in a short, neat package, just like Torna... phenomenal.
20. Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur (comic) #1-12
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The writing was a bit all over the place sometimes, but these two have a fun dynamic! Anyone who builds a dinosaur mech out of Lego is good in my book.
Also I love how a good chunk of this is Lunella wanting Kamala Khan to think she's cool
21. The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #1-5
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Unsurprisingly, the writer of Dinosaur Comics is still very funny
The entire issue with Galactus worth the price of admission alone, but this volume even included her very first appearance just to give context for Iron Man owing her a favour!
22. Catch These Hands! #4
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THOSE IDIOTS DID IT A low-key yet cute and funny yuri ending to a low-key yet cute and funny yuri series; consistently good in the end even as the self-doubt and misunderstandings pile up.
If you're hoping they get a good smooch, you won't leave disappointed!
23. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3
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I clocked out of the MCU after No Way Home, but the praise convinced me, and yeah! They can still make a good, actual movie!
Rocket's backstory was excellently done, and Mantis and Nebula were in top form here.
There's a Vocaloid song in this one. It rules
24. Young Ladies Don't Play Fighting Games #1-5
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Adore this manga already! It's by a huge FGC fan and it shows - it lets its shoujo characters get *super intense* to show the mindsets behind why people use trolly strats, obsess over training mode, or get salty at tournaments. It's great!
25. Street Fighter vs Darkstalkers (Udon comic)
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I expected a fast-paced, fanservice-filled romp, and that's exactly what I got! It's not the deepest, or anything, but you get exactly what you came here for.
There's a side story about BB Hood encountering Dan, Blanka, and Sakura and I wish we got a whole thing of just that
26. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
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Every five seconds of this could have been its own movie, and that would still be the most gorgeous animated thing ever made, holy shit
FANTASTIC followup to possibly my favourite movie ever; an absolute visual buffet, with spectacular characters.
27. Street Fighter Unlimited (Udon comic)
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There's a bonus Street Fighter 2010 comic that has future Ken fight Cyber-Akuma and the Akuma mech from Cyberbots, and that makes it all worth it.
Also Rufus (briefly) dies, Makoto dances, and Alex gets an actual connection to Gill, so yeah, this is fun
28. The King of Fighters: A New Beginning #1-4
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Shockingly... genuinely really good?! Like yeah, because it has to adapt KOF, half of the first volume is character intros, but the art is consistently killer, and it gives great personality to otherwise-plain guys like Shun'ei or Ryo.
Is it a good introduction to KOF for newcomers? Not at all, it's very much introducing the 14th part of a story so it gets convoluted with many characters and arcs very quicky, BUT it's peak KOF content for me because it has King of Dinosaurs being too much of a good guy to play the heel convincingly, *still wearing the Tizoc mask under the dinosaur mask*, and autographing Clark's hat because Clark is a huge Tizoc fan. Love that guy
(continued in the next post because whoops, image limit!)
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kulemii · 1 year
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5 OC Headcanons: Kenjiro Hara Readyyyyy Go!
special guest; oc edna namikawa <3
idea courtesy of @majimemegoro
cw; mentions of suicide, torture and abuse
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◈ 2 1/2 years ago someone that Kenjiro loved dearly took their own life and he was the one to find them (they knew he would be). In their note, they asked that he take care of their dog Runa because he was the only one they could trust to make sure that Runa lived a happy life. He's not one to deny the final wishes of those he loves and so day in and day out he spoils Runa with all the love in the world. She eats the best food. His apartment is filled with her toys. Everyday he’s sure to find the time to walk her- even in between murders :) Runa-chan gets her walkies <3
◈ His apartment is two blocks away from Kyoto Station and yet he still opts to drive everywhere. His car was the first major thing that he bought himself: Imported– German make. Black, sleek & stylish annnnnd it’s pretty much the same car as Hiro’s except it’s a more recent model. What can he say? When he used to chauffeur Arika and Edna around, he fell in love with the car so much he wanted one of his own! Is that a crime??? Fellas, is it a crime to subconsciously mimic every aspect of your crime boss’ slash fucked-up father-figure’s life and want it for yourself? 
◈ One thing that Kenjiro can’t mimic no matter how much he tries is Hiro’s techniques. Kenji is just… not great at forcing out information which is really important for an Itou man. The Itou Clan is NOTORIOUS for torturing and extorting their victims. He can torture someone and he’s come up with a brilliant system that helps pass along information within the torture room amongst Itou men without so much as saying a word so that the victims are none the wiser but the ratio for hurting ops versus getting them to crack is… it hurts his pride. He’s begged Hiro multiple times to let him shadow him but Hiro always insists on being in the torture room alone. He’s never gotten to see it once. He’s convinced that if he could just witness him in action once, he could replicate it forever. 
◈ Kenji gets recognized by random people out in town, women especially because of his club’s reputation but that’s not all of it. Actually, he gets recognized by women more often simply because he frequents cabarets and cabaret clubs– Ah ah, relax- it’s not for the reason that you think. In fact, the purpose is quite self-serving. His club, Reign, operates under the guise of being “members-only” but that’s simply a gimmick to make their attendees feel more self-important than they are. Literally anyone can become a member but the words “members-only” in that location generally scares off the riff-raff with no money. He offers membership cards to popular hostesses who are smitten with him because he knows that they will show up and he also knows that they’re keen to brag that they’ve been given the coveted Reign membership just for being oh so beautiful… He relies on hostesses as a cheap advertising method- word of mouth. Reign often has celebrity “visitors” too and he might ‘let it slip’ which star has reached out to book VIP and let the gossiping girls do the leg work for him. There’s quite a bit of overlap between some of the top cabaret clubs’ clientele and his disco- that’s why!
◈ Kenjiro left home when he was in his early teens due to his mother’s abuse. When the Namikawas took him in (at Edna’s behest) he got to see what a mother’s love could truly feel like and he feels there’s nothing like it. He adores Edna so much he’s almost forgotten what his biological mom was even like. Almost. Culturally, it was difficult in the beginning because he’d never so much as met an American before but once he understood who she was the rest came easy. Even after moving out on his own, he frequently made it a point to fetch her just to take her out on the town for lunch or shopping. He tells her everything– everything. Business and money, women and dating, goals and aspirations. She tried to talk him out of the yakuza life once and for her, he genuinely did consider it but he decided that his sins were far too great. But the thought of having a wife and bringing home kids that could call Edna their grandmother did make him feel all warm and fuzzy inside… As far as he’s concerned, that’s not in the cards for the future head of Itou.
edit: as of 2/26/2024, some information in bullet 2 is inaccurate. please disregard. for the more up to date information on this oc, please visit the kenjiro hara tag @sinsofthefather-kulemi
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crackspinewornpages · 2 years
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Jane Eyre 5/38 -Charlotte Bronte
(so this book is a fictional biography)
1
Jane was happy they couldn’t go for the evening walk because it’s raining and she doesn’t like being cold. (same girl) Her cousins were around their mother who refused to let her come near. She goes off to another room to read and shielded herself with curtains and describes the places where the birds in the book live. John bursts in with Eliza and Georgiana, John always bullied her and his mother ignored it and he slaps her for not addressing him right. (I’m sorry Lord Asshole of Bastardland) He takes the book saying she has no right to it being a penniless dependent, everything in the house belongs to him. “You have no business to take our books; you are a dependent, momma says; you have no money; your father left you none; you ought to beg, and not to live here with gentlemen’s children like us, and eat the same meals we do, and wear clothes at our mama’s expense.”p.5 (so he’s only the real child gets the best stuff kids) As she goes to leave, he throws the book at her drawing blood, they fight each other until separated and Mrs. Reed has her locked in the red-room. (she’s afraid of it)
2
Bessie and Miss Abbot dragged her to the room scolding her for hitting John, she’s worse than a servant, she does nothing for her keep. (a child doesn’t have to do anything for their keep they are children) And they threaten to tie her up talking about how she’s underhanded and not to think of herself as equal to the Reeds. (why would she want to think herself equal to a pile of human shit) She better make herself agreeable to them or be sent to the poor house or even God will strike her dead for her tantrums. When they leave her they lock the door, he room was decorated in red and rarely entered since Mr. Reed died in there nine years ago.  
“All John Reed’s violent tyrannies, his sisters' proud indifference, all his mother’s aversion, all the servants’ particulity, turned up in my disturbed mind like a dark despit in a turid well. Why was I always suffering, always browbeaten, always accused, forever condemned? Why could I never please? Why was it useless to try to win anyone’s favour?” p.9 (because you’re not the golden child) Eliza who was selfish was respected, Georgiana spoiled and spiteful was indulged and John’s cruelty and rudeness ignored. (Reed is one of those my child can do no wrong it’s everyone else who is the problem parents) Jane tried to be perfect but was named naughty and sneaking. No one punished John for hitting her and she thought of running away to escape the injustice or starve until she died.
She wondered why she suffered for years, she’s a nobody in Gateshead Hall, nobody loved her and neither did she. She didn’t hold the children’s interest or pleased them, had she been more brilliant and handsome she would be tolerated more and not a scapegoat. It grew later and colder and her ire died down, maybe she was a wicked child, she just thought of starving herself. She thought of her uncle on his deathbed making Mrs. Reed promise to raise her as one of her own children, Mrs. Reed probably thought she did with the interloper. (she treats you about as well as a cockroach that’s nothing to be thankful for)
She never doubted if Mr. Reed had been alive he would have been kind to her and feared his spirit would rise with the wrongs done to her. She tries to make herself stop crying and tries to open the door crying for Bessie and Miss Abbot to let her out. Miss Abbot calls her naughty for screaming out and dismisses her and Mrs. Reed tells her to be silent and she’ll be locked in longer as they shove her back in and she faints from fear.
3
She wakes up with people talking and for once a gentle hand holding her as she came to. She was in her own room and the apothecary, Mr. Lloyd, was beside her. He gives Bessie orders for the night and Jane is saddened when he leaves. “I felt so sheltered and befriended while he sat in the chair near my pillow; and as he closed the door after him, all the room darkened and my heart, again sank: inexpressible sadness weighed it down,”p.14 (oh she’s immediately attached to a stranger who shows her a smidge of kindness) Bessie asked if she’d sleep and Jane was afraid to answer and Bessie tells her she’s going to bed but to call if she needs anything. (are you actually going to help her or ignore her cries for help again) This civility boldened her to ask a question, is she’s sick, Bessie’s sure she’ll be better soon. When she leaves Jane overhears her saying she’s afraid she’ll die and wonders if she did see something in that room, while the servants are asleep Jane stays awake with dread.
The next day Jane felt weak from her mind and she was crying despite the fact she could be happy all the Reeds are gone and Bessie was being kind to her. She can't bring herself to eat a tart but perks up when Bessie offers a book but she can't read it. When Bessie finished tidying up the room she sings while sewing and Jane finds it sad. (it’s about an orphan)
In the morning Lloyd came again and said she should be more cheerful and asks Jane if she’s in pain. Bessie tries to disregard her tears as pettiness but Lloyd doesn’t believe it and Bessie scolds Jane for saying she’s miserable. (she’s treated like shit) Lloyd asks what happened yesterday, Bessie tries to say it was a fall (damn this feels like an abusive parent trying to cover their ass I the ER) but Jane bluntly explains she was knocked down. Bessie is called down and Lloyd tells her he’ll handle Jane. With Bessie gone Jane explains what happened that night and she’s unhappy with other things, he wants her to explain. “children can feel, but they cannot analyze their feelings; and if the analysis is partially effected in thought, they know not how to express the result of the process in words.”p.18 But Jane tries with this only opportunity and tells him how she’s treated.
She has no other relations but some called Eyre, Mrs. Reed suspects are poor, (why would you trust anything she says) he asks if she would like to live with them. “Poverty looks grim to grown people; still more so to children: they have not much idea of industrious, working, respectable poverty;”-”poverty for me was synonymous with degradation.”p.19 (you’re like ten what do you know you don’t even know how so called poor your relatives are) She wouldn’t want to live with poor people even if they were kind, she couldn’t see how they could be kind and Mrs. Reed said they’re a beggarly set. (she thinks the sun shines out her ass why would you believe anything she says) He asks if she would like to go to school, John hated his school and Bessie said that’s where ladies are expected to be genteel, still an escape to a new life.
Bessie came back as the carriage with the Reeds arrived, Lloyd leaves to go talk to Reed about sending Jane to school. At night Bessie and Abbot talk and Bessie says Reed was glad to get rid of a tiresome plotting child and Abbot called her Guy Fawkes. This is when Jane learned of her parents, her mother married a clergyman beneath her and her father cut her off, a year later they caught typhus (a bacterial infection caused by mites ticks and lice) and died. Bessie says Jane it to be pitied too, if she were nice and pretty, (what you think children should be treated horribly if they’re ugly) Abbot says she can't care for a toad like that unlike Georgiana. (99% of people is this book are horrible)
4
Jane waited for change in the tiresome weeks where Reed watched her and drew a clearer line between her and her children in keeping her separate. Eliza and Georgiana ignored her but when John started up again, she turned against him and he stopped and tried to get his mother who only told him she said to stay away from her. “I do not choose that either you or your sisters should associate with her.” “They are not fit to associate with me.”p.22 Reed takes her to the nursery and asks what her uncle would think. “My uncle Reed is in heaven, and can see all you do and think; and so can papa and mama: they know how you shut me up all day long, and how you wish me dead.”p.22 Enraged Reed shakes her boxes her ears (what lady can’t handle the truth) and leaves her proving to Bessie Jane being a wicked child and Jane half believed her.
January came and of course with the enjoyments of Christmas and New Years, Jane was excluded, only to see Eliza and Georgiana in their best and the noise of cheer. She was alone in the nursery with her doll, “human beings must love something, and in the dearth of worthier objects of affection, I contrived to find pleasure in loving and cherishing a faded graven image, shabby as a miniature scarecrow.”p.23 She waited in bed for the festivities to end and sometimes Bessie would bring her a cake during them, despite her temper Jane preferred her to anyone in Gateshead. (this is like preferring antifreeze to cyanide)
On January 15th Eliza was going out to feed her chickens and collect eggs to sell and save the money. From the window Jane watched a carriage come through the gate and Bessie ran up for Jane and scolds her for not being ready despite doing the chores she ordered her to do. She hurriedly gets Jane ready and takes her to the breakfast room where Reed showed her to a man, Mr. Brocklehurst. He questions her if she knows where naughty people go, hell, would she like to fall into it forever, no, and to avoid it, be in good health and not die. (I like little Jane she’s a smartass) He tells her children die daily, he just buried a five-year-old the other day and they’re now in heaven but the same won’t be said of her.  
He asks if she reads the bible and is shocked she doesn’t like Psalms, they’re not interesting. He declares it proof of a wicked heart, (of course the guy that likes the Old Testament is all doom and pits of hell fire) Reed takes over the conversation from there. She wrote three weeks ago that the teachers keep a close eye on her at Lowood school since she has a tendency to deceit and tells Jane not to impose Mr. Brocklehurst. “never was I happy in her presence: however carefully I obeyed, however strenuously I strove to please her, my efforts were still repulsed and repaid by such sentences as the above.”p.29 (you not her child and therefore not the golden child) Now the words cut her in front of the stranger and a feeling she was sowing unkindness in her new path.
Brocklehurst declares he’ll talk to the teachers and Reed says she wants Jane to be made to her prospects, useful, and she’ll spend her vacations at the school too. Brocklehurst assures Jane will be given special care since he does his best to mortify the sentiment of pride. Even his own daughter commented on how plain all the girls looked, “and those little holland pockets outside their frocks-they are almost like poor people’s children!”-”they looked at my dress and mama’s as if they had never seen a silk gown before.”p.29 (so you’re a rules for thee not for me type of religious guy) Reed says the system is perfect for Jane, she’ll send her immediately relieved of the irksome responsibility.
Brocklehurst leaves giving Jane a cautionary pamphlet to read, as the minutes pass Reed’s narrative to Brocklehurst about Jane stings and formed new resentment. Reed orders her back to the nursery at the door Jane felt she must turn to speak. “I am not deceitful: if I were, I should say I love you, but I declare I do not love you: I dislike you the worst of anybody in the world except John Reed; and this book about the liar, you may give your girl Georgiana, for it is she who tells lies, and not I.”p.31 “I am glad you are no relation of mine: I will never call you aunt again as long as I live. I will never come to see you when I am grown up; and if anyone asks me how I liked you, and how you treated me, I will say the very thought of you makes me sick, and that you treated me with miserably cruelty.”p.32 (tell her girl)
It’s the truth she thinks she has no feelings and can do without love but she can't, but she has no pity and she’ll remember her tossing her in the red-room as she cried and John’s cruelty. “People think you are a good woman, but you are bad; hard-hearted. You are deceitful!”-”Ere I had finished this reply, my soul began to expand, to exult, with the strangest sense of freedom, of triumph, I ever felt. It seemed as if an invisible band had burst, and that I had struggled out into unhoped-for liberty.”p.32 Reed looked frightened rocking like she was about to cry saying Jane made a mistake, (what mistake Reed reflect on your own soul and you’ll know the truth) Jane refuses for her to be her friend after what she said and she’ll let everyone at Lowood know what she’s like.
Reed says children need their faults corrected, deceit isn't her fault, she tells Jane to lie down in the nursery. Reed leaves the room, Jane the winner for the first time. She felt victory but it eroded into remorse because a child cannot fight their elders. (bullshit) She would have asked Reed for a pardon but she would have scorned her more for it. Instead, she tries to read but can't and goes outside still not feeling pleasure. Eventually Bessie calls her for lunch, after what she said to Reed she tells Bessie not to scold her somehow pleasing her by her frankness.
Bessie asks if she’s going to school wont, she be sorry to leave her, why when she’s constantly scolding her, she should be bolder since she’s so put upon. (you’re one of the ones that put upon her what did you expect her to act kike whenever she tries to assert herself and fight you’re one of those behind her mistreatment) Since the family is at tea she’ll have tea with her and cake and then help her pack. Jane makes her promise not to scold her anymore until she leaves for school. She’s gotten used to Bessie and doesn’t fear her, she likes her best. (that’s like preferring bees to wasps) Bessie asks what’s gotten into her lately but Jane doesn’t say what happened between her and Reed. That afternoon Bessie sang and told her stories, “Even for me life had its gleams of sunshine.”p.35 (girl your emotionally dumpster diving for food)
5
On January 19th Jane was already ready to leave, she won’t tell Reed goodbye she already visited her last night to tell her she’s been her friend and to be grateful, (with a friend like you who needs enemies) she didn’t say anything back as Reed wasn’t her friend. Jane called out goodbye to Gateshead Hall as they went out the front door to wait for the coach. Jane didn't remember much of the fifty-mile journey except for the Inn they stopped off for a while. She fell asleep for a bit to be woken by a woman asking for her and lead her inside.
A tall lady meets her, remarks on how small she is and gets her something to eat before bed. Miss Miller leads her through the building to a room full of girls of all ages dressed in the same brown frocks. Miss Miller orders the monitors to fetch supper, after eating oat cakes the girls ready two to a bed. No sooner had Jane closed her eyes they opened to a bell for morning. It was cold and one basin to six girls and after Miss Miller orders classes on scripture before breakfast. Jane was happy to eat after hardly eating anything the day before but to everyone's disgust it was burnt porridge and an upper-teacher ordered them to silence. They could barely eat it even a teacher remarks in disgust.
In the fifteen minutes before class was all the girls had to voice their displeasure but at nine Miller ordered them to their seats. Jane observes them all, even Miller looked overworked when all eighty girls and teachers stood up and Jane sees at the end of the row the woman that received her last night. Miller has the monitors fetch the globes and the woman moved up the room, Maria Temple, superintendent at Lowood and gave her lesson in geography.
After she gave an announcement as they couldn’t eat breakfast bread and cheese will be given for lunch surprising the teachers. (I don’t think I want to live in a time where bread and cheese for lunch was considered luxurious) They were ordered to the garden to work in despite the cold and mist, more than one was coughing. (foreshadowing) No one noticed Jane but she was used to it and she reflected on the present and future and read the school plaque multiple times not registering it. A girl’s coughing catches her attention (foreshadowing) and she asks if her book is interesting and starts up a conversation, contrary to habit. “but I think her occupation touched a chord of sympathy somewhere; for I too like reading,”p.45 the girl offers it to Jane but she’s disappointed there’s nothing about fairies and hands it back. (she prefers fairy tales)
Jane asked her what Lowood Institution means, it’s a charity school like for orphans, one or both parents dead. Fifteen pounds a year for an education, but not enough and teachers are ones from the neighborhood. Naomi Brocklehurst built the house, her son overlooks everything as treasurer and manager, he buys all their food and clothes. “He’s a clergyman; and is said to do a great deal of good.”p.47 (yeah a lot of them are said to do that but their true actions contradict it) She explains what the teachers do here but eventually grew tired of Jane’s questions and goes back to her book. They were then summoned for dinner, then classes until five, that afternoon she saw Miss Scatcherd (we all know a teacher like this one who loves harsh rules hates kids and wants to take it out on one or all of them) punish the girl she spoke to and had her stand in the middle of the room. Jane wondered how she could bear it quietly and firmly and wondered if she was the good or naughty type. After five they were served bread and tea, recreation, study then oat cakes, prayers and bed and that was her first day at Lowood. 
NEXT
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celticbarb · 17 days
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Book: THE LASS HE LEFT BEHIND
Author: Jayne Castel
Series: The Sounds of Mull, Book #1
Release Date: March 14, 2024
Publisher: Winter Mist Press
Print Length: 242 Pages
Overall Rating: 5/5 Stars
Blog Rating: 5/5 Saltire
The Sounds of Mull, Scotland
1314
This is a second chance romance. Will Mari Macquarie give Loch Maclean a second chance when he ripped out her innocent heart ten years ago? Did Loch destroy any chance to win the woman who owns his heart and soul? Read the first book in Jayne Castle's new series The Sounds of Mull.
Loch Maclean is a self centered heartless warrior who went off to fight the English for his King Robert the Bruce ten years ago. During this time he had never come back to visit his clan, family or Mairi Macquarie, the lass he left behind. Loch had never even sent a letter to his father, sister or Mairi. He only cared about his own needs and didn’t even think of anyone else while he was campaigning for Scotland’s cause.
Now since The Bruce and his warriors won the Battle at Bannockburn against the English It was time to return home. Loch comes home expecting everything to be the same. Except he discovers his father is dead and the lass he left behind had never married, except Mairi Macquarie is even more beautiful than he remembered! So he expects her to be waiting for him with open arms except she wants nothing to do with him. On top of that he finds out his father is dead and the enemy clan The Mackinnon’s are up to mischief again stealing clan, property and livestock and his clan what something done about it!
However Loch immediately becomes Laird and starts lording it over to everyone and tries to force his sister to marry their bitter enemy Laird Mackinnon. However nobody wants this match especially his sister and his cousin Jack. His cousin Jack has seen this man’s brutality and no matter what he says Loch won’t listen until it is too nearly too late!
As for Mari she has always loved Loch but only uses her for his own needs. He broke her heart ten years ago and she is not going to allow him to do it again. She ignores him as she is busy running her own Inn with her cousin. Except her cousin is sweet on one of the young men that came back with Loch after fighting for Scotland’s cause. When Mairi starts to let her guard down and open her heart and doesn’t change, she has had enough as this time it nearly destroys her broken heart.
Will Loch ever learn to respect the people that love him and get over his vanity and realize the mistakes he has made? Will Mairi ever forgive him or move on with a new love? Is it possible for Loch to redeem himself? I will never tell and spoil the book as you will have to read this wonderful story to find out!
This is a second chance romance story.Another wonderful story that I absolutely loved by my go to author Jayne Castel. I had a difficult time liking this hero to be honest. My heart definitely was breaking for the heroine as this was definitely an emotional read for me. Another Castel book I highly recommend and I can’t wait to read Jack and Tara’s story next!
Disclaimer: I received an advance readers copy and agreed to do an honest, fair, review and blog through Booksprout. All thoughts, ideas and words are my own.
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pugwitharug · 2 years
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Introducing: Book Thought Thursdays!
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Book Thought Thursdays is a new series I will be starting to help encourage myself and others to continue reading. I'll share my thoughts on books I've read, and everyone is free to add their own thoughts as well.
This week's book will be...
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Happily Ever Afters by Elise Bryant!
Genre: YA, Romance, Contemporary Fiction
Published: January 5, 2021
Length: 374 pages
How did I get it?: Once Upon a Bookclub: YA Edition
Plot: Tessa moves to Long Island to go to a special conservatory for fine arts to pursue her love of writing, but finds herself stuck in a tough writer's block once school starts. When she starts having feelings for one of her classmates, she thinks that experiencing an actual romance will help break down that block.
Content Warnings: Teenagers are a little insensitive to a mixed WOC and her disabled brother, really it's the second-hand embarrassment that got me more than anything actual disturbing
My Thoughts
Rating: 7.5/10
I enjoyed reading this book! It had something I could relate to, being a student with a passion for writing, I just didn't have a fancy conservatory like she did lol. I remember reading this a year ago in my class while we were watching a movie and just being so enamored by the main character and the friendships she had. I liked the side characters more than the actual MC, but a flawed MC is a good thing to have! Watching someone improve as a person is a part of what makes reading great....and what makes it embarrassing when they regress at the very last moment. I won't spoil what that is, but I'll tell you I was heavily disappointed in her decisions at the end of the book.
I cannot stress enough how much I love Tessa's first new friend (who has her own book now! It came out pretty recently and once I read it I'll cover it on here), and just her whole friend group in general. If you want a good sort of coming-of-age story with a good representation of mixed people and people with disabilities, I'd recommend this book. Really I just recommend this book in general, it's a good journey and it shows that people make mistakes in their lives, especially when it comes to relationships.
Quotes
"And that is the greatest risk, presenting something you love and asking others to love it too."
"I'm done taking up less space than I deserve."
"Why do his words get to come out all flawlessly Times New Roman, and mine are, like, Wingdings?"
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propertyline · 3 years
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literally the amount of self restraint i need to scroll past mi spoilers on my dash..... i want to know everything no i do not yes i do no i don't yes no
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pesiko · 3 years
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JAEHYUN SERIES RECS
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⇨ ongoing | ✔ completed
Balance of Us (sns AU) {19} ✔
Jung Jaehyun is the beloved captain of your university’s basketball team. You’re a freshman in the school ballet company and somehow get roped into giving him dance lessons. The issue is that your brother is Lee Taeyong aka Jaehyun’s on-court rival, who broke his little sister’s heart. That’s where you, revenge, and a little bet come into play. @solecize
Beyond the Palace Walls {10} ✔
Your father, the King, had always been highly protective of you. @prettywordsyouleft
Breathless (sns AU) {25} ✔
Jaehyun walks Johnny’s dogs for some extra cash, y/n is an unemployed psycho who likes to break into his house and eat all of his cheerios. When Jaehyun meets y/n, his life is turned into a series of very unfortunate events. @peachyuns
Broken {9} ✔
He punched hard, fought with all he had. He fought until he got you and fought until he lost you. @sugarjaee
Chlorine Dreams (sns AU) {15} ✔
There’s been a long standing rivalry at your school between the basketball team and the swim team. The swim team has been undefeated for 4 years, whereas the basketball team hasn’t won a game in 3. Every year the basketball team ends up with all of the funding for the athletics department whereas half of the school doesn’t even know the swim team exists. With a bet that Jaehyun wouldn’t even be able to finish a swim practice, y/n threatens the existence of both of their teams. @dahyunmingyu
Close as Strangers (sns AU) {17} ✔
Where Jung Jaehyun can’t decide whether he enjoyed spoiling your day or he just couldn’t show you how much he actually enjoyed being around you. @hyuckflirts
Dangerously {5} ⇨
You were polar opposites. He was royalty, you were a criminal. You hated him, he hated you. This mission was the last thing any of you wanted, but you had to make it work. @yesnanasbaby
Dusk Till Dawn {14} ⇨
After finding out that her entire family syndicate has been practically eradicated by a new, rising enemy, and that she is one of the only two survivors, Y/N is left with the responsibility and the legacy of the company hanging heavy on her shoulders. With the persuasions of an old friend, the charm of a new ally and a captivation with an enigmatic assassin, she joins the notorious group ‘U’ in a hope to restore her family’s dignity, and to squash the new opposition before they can bring the same fate to any other organisation in South Korea. @iridesuhnce
End to Start (sns AU) {13} ⇨
You work part-time at a small karaoke cafe during the night shift. Every month on the 18th, a brown haired boy wearing a suit, carrying flowers in his hands, always came in at exactly 10PM. He stays for two hours, playing the same song repeatedly before leaving. On a warm July night of the 18th, you told yourself that tonight you will talk to the boy. Can you free the shackles on the boy from the ghost that haunts him or is he long past saving? @bunny-doyounq
Fly Away with Me (sns AU) {24} ✔
When Johnny’s little sister flies all the way from chicago to live with his brother and college friends, their once peaceful apartment gets disrupted by an extremely annoyed Jaehyun who can’t seem to stop being mean to Johnny’s sister. @cupofjae
Healing {9} ⇨
You adored your mother, but sometimes, well sometimes she should have minded her own freaking business. Or, when paying your apartment bills becomes almost impossible, you manage to find a job in the infamous 127 Tower, which the Jung Family owns. Not as a secretary or as the cleaning lady, but as Jung Jaehyun’s daughter babysitter. @nctream
Let Me Know ✔
A recollection of all the times you’ve fallen in love with your best friend Jung Jaehyun, the times where you hopelessly pine after him, and the times where he starts to fall in love with you too. @ppangjae
Minor Inconvenience {4} ⇨
Spilling coffee all over a stranger only to find out that said stranger is your lab professor is your worst nightmare brought to life. You wish you were joking. @ppangjae
On the Rebound (sns AU) {12} ⇨
In an attempt to finally move on from his ex-girlfriend, basketball star Jeong Jaehyun reaches out to Y/N, who he knows has a crush on him. @whispersatdawn
Pact (sns AU) {15} ✔
What would happen if these two childhood best friends started to secretly ruin each other’s relationships in order to stay together because of a pact written on a failed math test 8 years ago ? @127-mile
Rollerskates (sns AU) {13} ✔
Who knew yn, who works at the local hangout spot, the roller rink, would end up falling for the campus fuck boy, Jung Jaehyun, and will he return the same feelings or keep going back to his ex girlfriend? @hhjwrld
Star Crossed (sns AU) {32} ✔
Y/n’s life story is written by her parents, but she wants to end the story before the final chapter: arranged marriage. @nakajeno
The Beauty Within (sns AU) {21} ⇨
You never passed up the chance to get in the good books of all your teachers. So when the opportunity arised to possibly make your chemistry teacher actually like you, seeing as he was the only one that seemed to have it in for you, you couldn’t say no. Only problem? You had to tutor the bad boy. @justwinwin
The Breakfast Club (sns AU) {32} ✔
In which you have to write a short film for one of your classes and somehow end up falling in love. @jaehyunhour
The Cowboy {15} ✔
Leaving the city for a rural area called Blayne seemed simple enough. Your task was to convince the people to agree with selling their land for a resort redevelopment. But once there, you soon realise that your city ways are entirely different to theirs. Winning their trust was going to take some effort, and when you start to fall for a local cowboy, you wonder if you really needed Blayne more than the city life after all. @prettywordsyouleft
The One with the Roommates {5} ✔
In which jaehyun and y/n are roommates and pretending to be his fiancé seems like a really good idea. @mistymark
To You {4} ✔
“If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don’t, they never were” ~ Kahlil Gibran @sugarjaee
Welcome to my Playground (sns AU) {16} ✔
All he wanted was a peaceful last year in university and all she wanted was to finally live in peace without her past haunting her. So what happens when their paths collide, will this be a start of a blossoming relationship or the beginning of a tragic story? @cupofjae
❥ JAEHYUN NAVI
[main masterlist] [nct masterlist] updated 7-30-21
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Going Back Home
Summary: Claire never thought she would be back in the town she grew up in. But after her fiancé broke off their engagement, leaving her 5 months pregnant and alone she found herself calling Frankie Morales in the middle of the night, one of her childhood friends who insisted that she booked the next flight out. Trying to fix her life with a little help from her friends she would find out soon that going back would be the best decision she ever made.
Pairing: Frankie Morales x Claire Beck
wordcount: 3.1k
Warnings: more or less unplanned pregnancy, break up, mentions of sexual encounters
A/N: I am a weak weak person so here it is, a chaptered fic. I will try to update this weekly, but no promises. Rating will go up later. I'm attempting slow burn. Let's see how slow lol Let me know what you think. Reblogs are, as always, appreciated 💙
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Even Though most of her happiest memories were connected with this town, the town she spent most of her life in, Claire never thought she actually would be back here. And certainly not pregnant and all by herself.
It wasn’t that she had been unhappy here. Claire just always wanted something… bigger. Something more. Something exciting. After her parents died and most of her friends moved away, there was nothing holding her back. Well, that wasn’t true. Frankie and Santiago were there. But only when they weren’t overseas or god knows where, which left her with her dream of being a journalist in a small town where she had no chance to ever make it.
She still remembered Santi’s face when she announced that it was her turn to leave just before they were about to be gone for months again. She had gotten a job in New York and thought for days about what to do until she took the job. That was eight years ago and they hadn’t seen each other in person since then.
Yet when she called Frankie three days ago in tears, it was like no time had passed. She wanted to call Santiago first, but she knew him. If she had told him what happened to her he would have gotten into his car and gotten to her, no matter if it took 3 straight days. No, she had called Frankie. He had listened to her for hours until he made her promise to book the next flight out.
When the fuck did her life become such a shit show?
Only a week ago, she had the dream job, was engaged and 5 months pregnant.
Claire was happy. Until her fiance came back from a work trip and suddenly announced that he wanted nothing to do with the child and moved out within days, leaving her on her own. Not even his phone number was working and she wasn’t gonna show up at his work. She wasn’t that desperate. She should have seen it coming. John never planned to have kids. But when Clarie found out that she was pregnant he had already asked her to marry him and maybe he was too proud to end the engagement back then. Thinking back maybe this was the reason he stayed. Because a part of him wanted to spend his life with her. They didn’t fight. He just moved out, told her that he would take care financially of her and the child, but that he didn’t want to be a father.
The first days she was just numb. Trying to wrap her mind around the fact that the man she thought she would spend the rest of her life with, left her while she was pregnant with a child they didn’t plan but that she loved without a doubt. That was what kept her going. Her little bean. Claire would do anything to protect her little girl.
The guys to this day called her bean. She found herself thinking more of them since John left. Even without seeing them in the last years, they still stayed in contact. Not a week went by where she didn’t receive a letter. They had a group chat that was only used when they were at home and the bachelor was on. Cause fuck did they all hate that show but they watched it anyways.
Claire was okay with the whole suddenly being on her own thing, until she felt her baby move for the first time and turned in her bed to wake her fiance, finding the side empty and cold. For one tiny moment, she had forgotten that she was alone in a city where she had only a couple of friends who were his friends rather than hers. She had always had a hard time finding friends. That probably wouldn’t change.
Sucking her bottom lip in, she rested one hand on her belly as she waited for her luggage to arrive. She slept almost through the entire flight. Claire had gotten rid of the last eight years of her life in the last 48 hours. She wanted to start fresh. She needed a fresh start. Even if she had no idea how to deal with all of this on her own.
A woman next to her helped her get her suitcases on the cart, noticing that Claire was on her own. Pushing the cart through security she saw Frankie as soon as the door opened and next to him Ben, Will and Santiago who all smiled at her, while she felt the first tears escaping her eyes.
She had met Ben and Will only a couple times, they were living an hour away, but they became part of the group immediately. Once upon a time her childhood best friend, Leah, was in that group too. Claire hadn’t thought of Leah in a long time. She had died in a car accident almost 12 years ago.
Arms pulled her in a warm embrace and even after years of not seeing each other for such a long time, she still noticed Frankie’s scent.
“We got you,” he whispered, kissing her hair. She sobbed once before she was pulled into Santi’s arms.
“Look at you,” he smiled before he looked down at her belly.
“And look at you?” he smiled and leaned down.
“Hello, this is your favorite Uncle speaking,” he winked, bending down to speak directly to her belly, making her chuckle.
“Oh please, we all know I’m gonna be the favorite, hey bean,” Will hugged her.
“Don’t listen to them baby girl, we know they're all gonna spoil you rotten,” she grinned, letting Ben kiss her cheek.
“So you’re staying?” Frankie asked and you nodded.
“I already called some realtors. I wanna get this over as quickly as possible. Already sold everything back in New York,” Claire said, looking at the two men who formed most of her teenage years.
“Okay. Let’s get you out of this airport first. You okay to stay with Frankie? He has the biggest house,” Santiago asked, pushing the cart as you slowly walked towards the exit with Ben’s arm around her shoulder.
“Uh… I don’t wanna impose. I could just take a room…”
“Fuck no. Stay at my place. It’s my Pa’s old ranch. I’m renovating it.”
“What? No way!” she said surprised but Frankie only nodded.
“Yeah after Liz and South America I needed something to keep me busy. Also needed more space for Elena,” he explained. A small smile sneaked to Claire’s face.
“I still can’t believe you’re a dad Frankie.”
“Can’t believe you gonna be a mom. Fuck we’re really adults now, huh?” he winked and Claire sighed.
“Certainly didn’t plan it that way. Or planned it at all,” she said sadly before she shook her head as if to get rid of the sad thoughts clouding her mind.
“I meant it, Claire. We got you. We are bored most times anyways.”
“Hey speak for yourself, Fish. I got a business,” Santi said.
“Yeah. Yeah. Me too. But after work you’re either drunk or after some pussy so?” Ben grinned, making her chuckle.
“So still no ladies in your life, boys?” Claire asked as they reached what definitely was Frankie’s truck. It had his company name on it. “Morales gardening”
“Nope. But now that you’re here we could finally….” Will started only for Claire to look away in disgust, making them all laugh.
“You ready to become a Daddy, Will?” she asked, her hands both on her belly.
“Uhm… of course?” he answered and she chuckled.
“That’s what I thought,” she patted his cheek.
“Come on. Let’s get you to bed. You must be exhausted,” Frankie said and opened the door for her.
“We’ll see you tomorrow for the BBQ,” they all waved. She waved back, letting Frankie help her inside before he closed the door behind her and hopped into the driver’s seat.
“BBQ?” she asked.
“Can’t blame the folks from wanting to welcome you, bean,” he winked.
“What folks?”
“Ya know. Folks. You gonna see,” he looked at Claire. He felt better now that she was here. Frankie had missed her these last years, the couple of calls throughout hadn’t nearly been enough. And when she called two days ago in tears… He would have gotten the chopper and flown over but he couldn’t risk it. He had to be on good behaviour to be able to keep seeing his daughter.
“I missed you, Francisco,” she whispered.
“Missed you too, Bean.”
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The sun was already setting when Frankie drove down a familiar path. Claire had spent countless days on this ranch when she was younger.
“How is your Dad doing?” she asked softly and Frankie sighed as he killed the engine in front of the house.
“I fucking hate that I can’t take care of him on my own, but he’s hanging in there.”
“I’d like to visit him if you’re okay with that,” she reached over squeezing his hand and he looked at her with a small smile.
“I bet he would love that.”
“And I’m sure he would have wanted it this way, Francisco. You know your dad. He wouldn’t have wanted you to drop everything for him. Don’t be too hard on yourself,” she said quietly.
“Damn I really missed you Bean,” he shook his head.
“Missed you too,” she let her head fall against his shoulder.
Claire didn’t really have eyes for the house, all she wanted was to go to sleep.
“I finished the guest room this morning for you,” Frankie said, setting one of her suitcases down as he opened the door.
“Please tell me you didn’t work overnight to finish this,” she sighed looking at him. He was rubbing the back of his head, pulling the cap he was always wearing down and avoiding her eyes.
Knowingly she shook her head, but couldn’t help the smile sneaking to her face.
“I won’t say it. But please don’t touch the walls, they might still be wet,” he said and she chuckled.
“Okay. Bathroom is over there. The shower isn’t working yet but you’re welcome to use mine. Will is coming over to take a look and make this one work. Other than that if you need anything just ask. Until you found a place this is your home.”
“You really didn’t have to do this, Frankie,” she said quietly, feeling overwhelmed by all of this. So many things had changed in such a short amount of time for her and she only now seemed to realize that she was indeed about to be a single mom.
“I wanted to. You’re… You don’t deserve to be treated like this. So let us help you, okay?” he said softly and she nodded but avoided his eyes.
“Okay. Go to sleep. My room is down the hallway if you need anything,” he stepped closer, kissing her forehead and for one tiny moment, she felt like the 15 year old teenager again who was crushing on Frankie Morales.
“Good night, Francisco,” she smiled.
“Good night, bean,” he whispered before he turned around and closed the door behind him.
Claire looked around, in awe of the room, the bed looking so inviting to her. Sighing she walked over to the window, knowing she would be able to see the whole property during the day. Crossing her arms in front of her she closed her eyes, listening to the sounds of nature that she had no idea she had missed living in the city for all these years. She felt a fluttering in her belly, her hand wandering down to feel a kick.
“We’ll be happy here, I promise,” she vowed, rubbing over her belly.
She didn’t want to disturb Frankie, even though she could hear the TV running so she just washed herself at the sink before she put her Pajamas on and sat down on the bed. She would unpack tomorrow. For now she had to sleep.
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The sun wasn’t even up when Claire woke up. She turned in bed, propping herself up so she could look out the window and watch the sunrise. She had to make a plan. A plan that included finding a house, a doctor and help. Though help would be her smallest problem. She already looked at houses in the area and it didn’t look good. If she had more time she would buy the house just down this road, but there was no way the house would be ready before her due date. She would ask Santi for help. He had a lot of connections through his business. Though Frankie too. Claire knew that he had a little gardening company since he lost his pilot’s license. He never really talked about it, but then again, they didn’t talk that much. She knew that he had some problems with drugs in the past, but that he has been clean for almost two years and was doing better. She also knew that there was a lot more to this story then he had told her. Maybe they would have time to talk. To really talk. Groaning to herself, her quiet and peaceful morning was interrupted by her bladder. Time to start the day.
For a minute she wondered if she could risk sneaking into Frankie’s room to take a shower when she heard music playing. Grabbing her bathrobe and toiletries she opened the door and walked down. Now being really awake she had time to take in the house. It seemed like there still was a lot to do. The walls were still unpainted, the floors still old, though she could see he already started with the floor the closer she got to the kitchen.
Frankie was sitting at the kitchen island, a cup of coffee in front of him as the radio quietly played in the background. He had a serious case of bed hair and she smiled to herself. He hadn’t noticed her yet and she found herself thinking back to all the times she had thought that maybe there was something more in between them than friendship. And maybe there was at one point a long time ago. But that was before he joined the military. She might be selfish for it, but she couldn’t be in a relationship where her partner was gone all the time. She needed someone to be there. Even Though there had been times in the past she had found herself asking if maybe she should have risked it.
Instead she had slept with Santiago.
Yeah, that was a big fuck up. Well it was also a pretty good fuck but it was just once and they definitely were better off as friends. She still didn’t know if Frankie knew. Not that she had to explain herself. Frankie always knew what effect he had on the women around him, and he sure as hell took advantage of it. And now she felt nothing more than love for him. As a friend, nothing more.
“Good Morning,” she said quietly and Frankie turned his head, yawning at her.
Chuckling she walked over taking in the kitchen, setting her toiletries down.
“You weren’t kidding when you say you were still renovating,” she sat down next to him. He got up from his seat walking over to fix her a mug of tea.
“Still hooked on Strawberry tea, I hope?” he asked and she nodded, surprised that he remembered.
“Yeah. Though the kitchen and living room are supposed to be finished by the end of next week. So sorry for the noise in the next couple days,” he walked over and set down the mug of tea in front of her.
“Hey it’s your house. I’m just thankful you let me stay.”
“Of course. Couldn’t let you stay in the dumpster motel in this town,” he winked. She took a sip of the tea and it was perfect.
“So what are you planning for today?” he asked.
“I probably should start looking into houses. I’m kind of on a timetable here,” she rested one hand on her belly and Frankie followed her movement.
“Yeah. I think Pope already called someone for some houses. It’s not looking good.”
“Yeah I thought so. Everything I found on the internet was in really bad shape,” she sighed.
“It’s gonna work out. And if you don’t find something, you’re welcome to stay. The place is big enough,” he shrugged and Claire laughed quietly.
“Yeah I bet you can’t wait to live with a hormonal pregnant woman and then with a newborn,” she joked.
“I lived with Pope. Nothing can be worse and…”
“And?” she asked.
“I already lived with a hormonal pregnant woman. It’s not that bad,” he shrugged with a small smile. She looked at him with a small smile on her face.
“You say that now. Wait till I’m craving your mug cake at 3am now that I’m living with you,” she joked. Frankie laughed.
“Wow I haven’t had one of those in at least 10 years.”
“Well then it’s about time.”
“Yeah,” he sighed, looking at Claire. She looked more relaxed today, like she had a good night’s sleep and he was thankful he put in an overnight to finish the guest room for her. She deserved to relax. When she told him that she not only was pregnant but dumped by her fiance Frankie was furious, yet at the same time he already decided that he would take care of her and help her with everything she needed. It was the least he could do.
Even though they grew apart in the last years, she still was one of his best friends.
“Okay. I’m gonna go take a shower. I got to drive out to check on a project. You gonna be okay here for a while?” Frankie asked. Claire nodded, grabbing her mug of tea.
“Just tell me when you’re going out so I can take a shower,” she said.
“Thank you, Frankie,” she whispered when she stopped next to him and softly kissed his cheek, before she walked down the hallway. Frankie looked after her with a soft smile before he got up to get ready to head out.
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manchesterau · 3 years
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my thoughts after reading my policeman: SPOILERSS of course!! (ignore spelling or grammar mistakes) (this is very ramble-y and not as in depth as it could have been sorrryyy lol, if you want specifics send me an ask after reading this)
okay...so i read the book in 3 days....which....im very proud of myself bc it takes me so long to finish books but that’s not why you are reading this.
im not going to lie to you...i liked the book. i love angst, and this had plenty of it and i liked it. if you like books such as: harry potter, six of crows, red queen, red white and royal blue you will not like this book. i know many people found it boring, which yeah i can see that, but i didn't find it boring at all. but mostly because i love boring books but that's beside the point. 
the book flowed easily, there isn't a bunch of raunchy sex scenes that ive seen people say it has (i...the things ive read idk what book they even read????) and Tom does has backward views on marriage and what it means to be a wife. but he is not overtly sexist or misogynist or abusive, or subvertly those things either. to be frank he's a scared gay man in the 50s trying to not get caught and thrown in jail. that's literally it. (ill go more into detail on him later). but if you want to read this book i recommend you go in knowing that there will be homophobia (the word queer is used as a slur....3 times or 4 but no more than 5), expect outing, expect not supportive characters, and remember to have some compassion (more on this later).
next i want to go into characters: starting with tom, then Marion, then Patrick, and then the other characters. so if you are planning on reading this book or just dont want to be spoiled them....don't read the next bit.
Tom:
I'm going to get this out of the way.........Tom (who we never get to know outside of the two-point of views we are presented with, and who is being played by Harry) is a police officer in the 50s UK. to be frank when the rumors first went around I was mad like a lot of people were, which is funny because when we got those pictures of harry reading the book before all the speculation we were....happy, that he was reading a book about a gay man. now...I don't care honestly. I could call out the hypocrites (i won't) and honestly I'm hypocritical myself. I use to watch shows like svu (if you were to turn it on right now I wouldn't turn it off) and I enjoyed watching svu. I know and have seen a lot of mutuals, people on my dash enjoy cop shows like b99, or who like actors who have played the character of police before. so it would be hypocritical of me to be mad at him (this is just my single black opinion) and then go and turn on svu (which I don't do anymore). 
I'm not saying that no one can be mad, I'm not saying that the anger people have at him playing this role is bad or not needed or valid. all I'm saying is.....is that I don't care. I got angry over this months ago, and all that anger I felt I don't have anymore, and I can't tell you why. Harry is playing an abusive demented husband who traps his wife in a simulation, and then he will play a gay policeman trying not to face persecution..........and that's that. nothing I can say will reach him, he's playing these roles and there is nothing I can do. will I watch them (pirating of course) yes.
anyways let's get back to tom's character (do not use my opinion to silence other black people I will find you....don't do that shit weirdo): tom is......tom?? like I literally was expecting the worst when I read this because of what other people had to say. but as I'm reading him through the eyes of Marion (his wife) and through the eyes of Patrick (his...true love, fuck the 50s I hate the 50s) one word came to mind constantly: scared. Tom is very scared that he will be found out and his life will be ruined. His family knows about him, which is why I think his father (more on him later) pushed him to be in the national service (where he was a cook, which disappointed him). you don't realize his family knows and then his sister says something and then you go 'wait....THEY KNEW???' and then you will go 'oh so that's why-' 
tom does have old fashion views that you would expect of any man at that time (gay or not it's the 50s and gay men are still capable of saying sexist shit). when asked by Patrick if women should still work after having a kid he said no it's the men's job to provide, Marion said she would like to keep working, he said no when they do have a baby (they literally never did, and idk why he thought he could be intimate with her for that long to produce a baby lol). that's....the most sexist thing he said in the whole book (there maybe some small things im forgetting but nothing that really stood out). that's it. I know it's not small and that was a legitimate issue in the 50s but yeah. Just in case you were apprehensive about Tom's character being a raging woman-hater, no,....he just wasn't a true feminist yet (???? I don't know that's like..the most this book says about an issue women were facing at this time). It's still bad what he said (you'll see how Marion justifies it in the book and both Patrick and her don't agree and try and challenge him on his view).
i dont want to go too in depth but it is very obvious from the beginning he has no and i mean ZEROOOO interest in her at all (you can tell when it hits him that he needs a wife and he starts to act a littleee different but it's not romantic at alll). 
i feel like my review on tom is shit but like!! we don't really get to know him without bias from Patrick and Marion. I think Harry will play a wonderful Tom (even tho he doesn't not fit the description for Tom...at all....like at alllll).
To summarize Tom: very scared gay man from the 50s who is trying to do everything he can to not be found out. his family knows, even he knew at a young age, and yes he does quit being a police officer but it doesn't happen as soon as id like but then again he wasn't one for that long if you pay attention to the years.
Marion:
😑 
i just...if yall could see the notes i made on her.....
To summarize Marion: SHE IS LIVING IN LALA LAND, TOM LITERALLY SHOWS HER NO ROMANTIC INTEREST AT ALLL, AND WHEN SHE METS PATRICK FOR THE FIRST TIME SHE FREAKING NOTICES THAT HE'S ALL BLUSH-Y AND SHIT LIKE...GIRL.....
this is a note i wrote that sums up her and tom's relationship (which is more like friends then anything romantic i mean god their honeymoon was horrible and he proposed to her....nvm 😑)
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listen...i can't lie and say i didn't feel sorry for her up until the end when she (spoilers: she outs patrick to his employer which ends up with him getting arrested). after that...ive never hated a character more in my fucking LIFEEEE like oh my god i was pissed
all she does is have fantasies about him being romantic with her (holding hands, hugging, etc) and none of them come true...BECAUSE HES GAYYYYYY i really....the author could have done a better job because there were so many damn red flags.
she's fucking annoying and whiny and yeah it sucked to be a woman in the 50s but you literally outed someone your husband was in love with and thought that you could just go back to being married like he's not devastated and instead of telling what you did you stayed unhappy and made your husband thing that at any point they were coming for him too.......*****
Patrick:
PATRICKKKKK
Patrick and tom deserved a fighting fucking chance i hate the fuck 50s fuck you 50s!!!! I absolutely LOVEDDD his pov and seeing Tom through his pov like it was just so damn refreshing seeing the world through his eyes and how he navigates his queerness in the society they live in. (the dichotomy between a proud gay man and a scared maybe proud but fear overrules that (talking about Tom here) gay man).
There was a lot more to say on how gay men were being persecuted at this time than how women were treated in this particular book. There were some little things here and there about what was expected of Marion as a wife and of a girl/woman at that time but it wasn't the focus.
I loved seeing the way Patrick navigated through his world of art and creativity. And how Tom seemed to fit right in with him.
I hate the things the author made Patrick go through (outed, sent to prison, stripped of his job, and later on in the present day he has had 2 strokes in his 70s). it felt a bit much but it's not too distracting (Patricks pov takes place in the past as he writes in his journal). 
Patrick and Julia (more on her later) are my two favorites in the whole book (Tom is third bc he's a very multi-facted character, Marion is not even on the list) and I wish we got a lot more of Patrick's pov.
Other characters!! (speed round bc this is wayyy too long):
Syvlie (Tom's sister): SYVLIEEE IM MAD AT YOUU I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WHYY WHYYY
Julia: JULIAAAAA QUEEENNN (you'll see why i love her at the end) 
Tom's parents: his father is abusive point-blank. or at least i think he's abusive (verbally). as im writing this i am now realizing that the way Tom's mom reacts to him (sometimes crying) is bc they knew he was gay omg wow.
tom's dad is very much a man's man guy?? Picture a sexist man from the 50s....now picture him with a gay son.....yeah, I'm not surprised Tom went into national service then to the police force. you can tell he didn't want anyone to find out about Tom so he pushed him to do what he thought best and Tom went with it, scared. 
overall: please do not go into this book expected things to be all flowers and rainbows...this is a book about two gay men in the 50s yall.....
there is something to be said about the tragedy that is in a lot of queer stories, I'm more interested in how white these stories are (that's a rant for another time). but I don't mind my policeman, and i think stories like this should be told. because this actually happened (here is a link to em forster's story where the author takes inspiration from, he really had an affair with a policeman!!! who had a wife!!!).
the ending is bittersweet, and i couldn't help but curse for what could have been. Marion could have not outed Patrick (which she instantly regretted), she could have gotten a divorce (she even contemplated it), they could have been more secretive, Julia could have not said what she said. I think Patrick and Tom were sadly doomed from the start, I just wish they had more time together because I loved seeing their love (the little glimpse we got) bloom into something bigger than them.
thank you for reading!! here are random screenshots of my notes as i read this lol enjoy!!
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tma-ficrec · 3 years
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Five All Time Mod Recs
To start off this blog, we decided to submit ourselves to the mortifying ordeal of being known and show y’all our TMA top fic recs!
These are fics of very different premises and categories that stayed with us and soothed our souls. Feel free to ask for more recs (or more specific stuff) because we’re definitely not done. Enjoy!
Mod Ami:
Statement Ends  by @martivist 4k words. Jonmartin. Angst. Post-canon AU. Ending Speculation. Lore speculation. S5 AU.
"Final statement of Jonathan Sims. The Archivist. Statement given… I think it’s June? We haven’t done very well counting time since the days stopped. Summer 2019, call it that. Statement begins.
We’ve found a way to send them back where they came from. All of them."
Forty-some years after the apocalypse abruptly ends, the final acts of Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood come to light.
Mod note: This fic... goddamit this fic. I read it halfway through s5 and I genuinely think this is one of the best endings the show could have had. It hit all the points Jonny made and then some. This fic is pain, yes, but the best kind.
Ninety Feet To Home by @judesstfrancis 33k words. Jonmartin. No Powers AU. Baseball Players AU. Fluff. Pining.
Jon isn’t really Martin Blackwood’s biggest fan. And he knows it’s a him problem, because it’s not like Blackwood is a terrible person or like he loses on purposes just to ruin Jon’s life, but he can’t help it. In his defense, if you were on a hot streak and the same person kept coming in and ruining it for you every single time, you'd harbor a bit of resentment towards them, too.
Mod note: I’m so obsessed with this AU that I broke my vow of not making fanart for TMA and made fanart of it. Yeah. Sue me. It’s the perfect levels of pining, ridiculousness and it brought me (an argentinian whose only baseball reference is the HSM musical number) tremendous joy. As the us-statians would say: home fucking run. ALSO, MARTIN BLACKWOOD IS LATINOOOOO.
Maybe not the stuff of legend by imperfectcircle. 14k words. Jonmartin. Post-canon AU. S5 AU. Ending Speculation. Lore speculation. Angst with a Happy Ending.
Martin forgets slowly at first, and then all at once. One moment he's grasping at memories, desperate without knowing why to retain even a single image of an angry, scarred stranger saying incomprehensible things about eyes, and the next, nothing. He can't even remember what had him so anxious just now. A car alarm, probably, or a dog barking in the distance. He's always startled easily.
Mod note: I still quote it to myself from time to time. ‘’Martin, you ate the megalodon’’ makes me giggle and also terribly sad. This is an excellent way of exploring entities lore, as well as grief and hope. 
the garden of forking paths by @bibliocratic. 49k words. Jonmartin. Post-canon AU. Ending Speculation. Angst with a Happy Ending. Use of Spiral Doors.
Whatever he had predicted might happen, Jon wasn't expecting to survive upon demolishing the Panopticon. He certainly wasn't expecting to be rescued.
Instead, he wakes up in an alternative universe where he's never been the Archivist, and Martin Blackwood doesn't exist.
Martin Blackwood wakes up somewhere else entirely.
Mod note: I’m argentinian and the major element in this story is a Borgues book. OF COURSE IT’S HERE. This fic is an absolute ride and so so so beautiful - multiple universes and Jon and Martin doing the same thing over and over and over again, with hope of finding each other.
Family, Found  by Dribbledscribbles. Gen fic. 9k words. S4 Divergent. Canon Divergence. 
It’s Basira who catches onto it.
The collective shift that seems to come over them when heading in or out of the Institute. Not just the oppressive sensation of being observed, their every move catalogued for the voyeuristic cravings of some unseen Eye(s). That feeling remained with them even when they left the Institute these days, but it was always stronger inside its walls. That wasn’t the change. Nor was it the point.
The point was: making life worse for Jonathan Sims.
Mod note: Do you want to hit the Eye? Do you want all the Entities’s plans to be twarted by the power of found family? Do you want everyone who blamed Jon for everything in S4 to sit down and apologise? This is your fic.
Mod Ebby:
the apple of the eye by  gocrazygostupid. 2.8k words. Fluff. Lore speculation.
TELL ME, ARCHIVIST
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SONG?
i'm not sure. i don't really get the chance to listen to music
if i told you, what would you do with it?
Mod note: I am absolutely weak towards any fic that gives the Entities some form of sentience, no matter what canon said. Especially when these interactions are so surprisingly soft. 
I WOULD PLAY IT
I WOULD LISTEN
in the chillest land and on the strangest sea by  imperfectcircle and raven (singlecrow). 19k words. S4 Divergent. Canon divergence, in the space between 159-160
Jon remembers a statement he read years ago given by a Jesuit priest, who said that the shortest prayer he knew was, just, fuck it, as in fuck it; it's in God's hands. He takes Daisy's hand and trails on after her.
or; hope is a thing with feathers.
Mod note: Everytime I read this fic, I end up at least a little teary eyed. It’s not exactly happy, more bittersweet, considering, but I still love it.
Come Love This World (Come Hate It, Too) by cedarbranch. 3.3k words. Character Study, fluff and angst, spans s1-5. Canon Compliant. 
Jon never liked poetry, until Martin.
Mod note: Yes I am picking fics that personally came for my heart one way or another, not much else to say, besides that “it feels like loving you” haunts me still to this day, in a good way.
i love you, i'm glad i exist by kissyourlocalmoth. 1.7k words. Scottish safehouse period. Fluff.  Established relationship.
Martin was thinking of a poem. It’s name sat on the tip of his tongue, aching to get out. It was a lovely one, too: something about how life felt easy now, at peace; how the small things felt like everything, a poem about… the importance of the little moments. These last few days had been like that, he thought. He couldn’t stop smiling to himself recently, and even Jon teased him about it sometimes, though he was hardly less giddy. He thought of the immense joy the little things brought him now, the mugs of tea they made for each other, how he would lay in their bed late at night staring at the ceiling, his love nestled against his chest, overflowing with so much contentment and fondness he did not know what to make of himself.
Mod note: Short and sweet, it was the first time I read that particular poem, and now it’s forever intertwined in my head with little scenes of jon and martin in the scottish safehouse before 160 happens.
exit wound by autoclaves. 3.1k words. Post-canon AU. Ending speculation.
Suppose there is a house on a hilltop. Suppose there is a story. There is always a story, and every universe is always expanding.
Mod note: I would’ve liked to tag this more, but it would probably spoil the twist it has. Reading back on it, the narration reminds me of the statement from 196, which I find fitting and a funny coincidence, considering. 
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amandaklwrites · 3 years
Text
Top Ten Favorite Christmas/Holiday Movies
This Top Ten may seem silly, but the list came to me, so I thought, why not! Christmas is my favorite holiday, and that time around Thanksgiving, leading up to Christmas, is easily my favorite time of year. It does something to my soul that I love. So, I have a lot of these movies that I love, love, love. So here we are: my Top Ten Favorite Christmas/Holiday movies!
1. It’s a Wonderful Life
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This is my absolute favorite. I grew up with it (I have watched a lot of old, old movies and shows because of my family), and it was when I was like a preteen that I figured out that Jimmy Stewart is one of my favorite men. I love all the actors in this movie, the crazy sets, the feelings of it, the themes. It always makes me cry, and it’s the movie I watch every Christmas Eve, no matter how late it is.
2. Elf
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This is one that both my mom and I love equally. And it has become some weird thing that both of us agreed upon (without specifically saying so) that Elf is always the first Christmas movie we watch every year. My mom’s birthday is in early December, so we usually watch it around then, and it just brings me right into the season.
3. The Christmas Chronicles
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I watched this movie for the first time last year, and I LOVED it! It’s hilarious, it’s a wild ride, and it’s still wonderfully sentimental as Christmas movies are supposed to be. Plus, this version of Santa is the absolute best. He’s so rad and crazy, and I want to meet this Santa in real life!
4. Last Christmas
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This movie just gives me all the feels. It’s sweet, hopeful, heartbreaking and romantic. The twist in it (I won’t spoil, I promise!) surprised the hell out of me, though I had guessed it not long before. This is a Christmas movie that is so different from others.
5. The Nutcracker and the Four Realms
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I’ve always loved the story of the Nutcracker. I’ve seen the ballet a few times, and I think we all have this story ingrained into us for Christmastime. I saw this movie in theaters and it was so magical. It’s beautiful, wonderful and surprising. Another great addition to me.
6. The Man Who Invented Christmas
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This movie so just so fun. I love A Christmas Carol, and this fun spin on how Dickens created the story is wonderful. It is so creative to make the characters come to life (sometimes, they really do!). It gives a new feel and brings the story and Christmas to life.
7. Samantha: An American Girl Holiday
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This movie was a fave growing up. I haven’t watched in a few years (I think I will this year!), but every time I do, I’m instantly like twelve again. It’s so sweet and beautiful and makes me think of my childhood.
8. The Holiday
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I love this movie. It’s so romantic and funny and is just a great rom-com. I can’t say much else to it, because that’s simply it. I guess I’ll add: Jude Law, right?
9. Rise of the Guardians
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This movie is really something I can watch any time of the year, but it brings a new feeling at the holidays (even though it’s set around Easter?). I think it’s the feel of late winter, and that it features Santa Clause and literally Jack Frost. It’s one I always watch as the holidays lead up, and it makes me feel so warm and fuzzy.
10. Dash & Lily
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I know, I know, this is a Netflix series. But I read the book when it first came out, and I loved it, so when the series came out last year, I was so excited. And I loved it! It brought so much magic to the season (that’s literally what the two of them were doing for each other), and the romance is so adorable and fun.
Runner Up: A Christmas Carol (2019)
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There are so many different adaptions of this story. I think more than anything else. But this one has become my favorite since I saw it a couple of years ago. I like that it’s so dark, and I love how much more they added to the story. They made Scrooge even more horrid, and the twists of the stories were so great, and the ending was fantastic. I even convinced my grandma to watch it and she liked it! It’s just a great adaption, because it feeds so much of what I love in stories.
I’m so ready for the holidays again already. 
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ace-trainer-risu · 2 years
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oh here! i’ll come ask you for book recs lol. do you have any spooky and/or autumn-y book recs? or just your fave books :)
First of all, I'm sorry this took me SO long to answer. I want to say I've been busy but it's just been general [waves hand vaguely] life.
ANYWAY thank you for asking! I actually don't read scary stuff a lot b/c I'm a wimp, but I have a few spooky/autumnal books up my sleeves! Let's see what we've got!!
1) The Little Stranger by Sarah Waters
Let me just start by saying that Sarah Waters is one of my absolute favorite authors ever! All her novels are suspenseful, twisty historical novels with great female and queer characters. Although, fair warning, actually The Little Stranger is like her one novel that isn't queer, but it is VERY good. If you read The Little Stranger and like it, please read Fingersmith and/or The Paying Guests.
The Little Stranger is set in the countryside of post-WWII England and follows a mild-mannered doctor as he becomes increasingly involved in the lives of the family living in the local, increasingly decrepit, possibly haunted mansion. Think Downton Abbey but creepy. Strange things keep happening inside the house, from dog bites to mysterious sounds to creepy black spots. Literally just typing that gave me goosebumps. It seems like someone may be out to get the family, but who...or what? Is it simply the ghosts of their own painful memories, or is something more? Sarah Waters is excellent at lush, intricate historical detail, and she leans into that here to create an atmosphere of slowly building dread and horror and mystery.
That being said, as a person who isn't normally a fan of horror, I don't think this book is too scary. It's more of an atmospheric, psychological horror than a jump-scare, bloody horror. It's not a book that will give you nightmares (probably), but you might lie awake thinking about it.
Also. Pro-tip. As a haunted(?) house story, the house is obviously fairly central to the story. Dear fellow Americans, keep in mind that the British refer to the floors of a building differently than us. For Americans, the ground-level floor is called the first floor, the floor above that the second floor, etc. For the British, the ground-level floor is the ground floor, and the floor above that is the first floor, etc. There's all sorts of creepy references to characters hearing noises above them on the first floor, but I was just like, Why are they always in the basement?
2) Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno Garcia
This and the above are two very different books, and yet they are both set in the mid-1900s and both are about weird, creepy, maybe-haunted houses. What can I say, I like gothic fiction.
After our heroine, Noemi, receives a bizarre, borderline incoherent letter from her beloved cousin, she sets out to visit her in the literally decaying mansion she resides in with her husband and his new family deep in the countryside of Mexico. All Noemi wants to do is persuade her cousin to come back home with her, but her cousin's new in-laws are very determined not to let that happen...or to let Noemi leave either. Secrets abound in the bizarre house and even creepier nearby cemetery, and soon Noemi finds that she too is suffering from bizarre dreams and visions...although, are they just dreams?
This book is so weird, but in such a good way? I read it for a book club and every week we had increasingly bizarre theories about what was going on, we were googling alchemy and fungi and St George, and some of our theories were even right. Although definitely not all. Another very twisty one that keeps you guessing.
In terms of scariness, interestingly I think there's more overtly creepy and horrifying moments in this novel than The Little Stranger, but I found TLS more overall scary? But that may be because I read it quickly, which I think is the ideal setting for suspenseful stuff, and I read Mexican Gothic over a longer amount of time since it was for a book club. This one does have some more typical horror elements to it, but I don't think it's more creepy than terrifying.
3) The Echo Wife by Sarah Gailey
I listened to this one as an audiobook and the audiobook is excellent so would recommend that, but have no doubt it would also be great to physically read.
Oh my god this book...it's more thriller than horror, but I think it fits the brief. There were multiple moments listening to this book that I literally gasped or said "OH MY GOD!" out loud, and there are moments which are very creepy and horrifying. There's a particular scene in the backyard... Again, incredibly suspenseful and twisty. And the character development and character psychology is just! really really good! There's also really interesting and knotty feminist stuff which is a lot more complicated and nasty than some of the "girlboss" stuff which is popular right now.
Super minimal summary: All you really need to know is that it is a sci fi novel about a scientific researcher trying to pick up her life after her marriage has imploded, only for everything to go BATSHIT WRONG. Trust me, that's all you need to know, it's better to go into this not knowing what's going to happen or what to expect. I had no clue what this novel was about when I started it, and holy shit. Very good book, absolutely recommend this if you want some super suspenseful, creepy sci fi that will make you say "oh my GOD" repeatedly.
Okay, shifting gears a little now b/c autumn isn't just spooky, it's also cozy and restful and daydreamy!
4) The Thinking Woman's Guide to Real Magic by Emily Croy Barker
This isn't maybe a cozy book per se, but it's a great book to cuddle down with on a dreary day and lose yourself in. If you've ever asked yourself, "What would it be like if you crossed Pride and Prejudice with Howl's Moving Castle except the wizard was way worse but somehow still sexy" - then you should read this book! I actually came across this book b/c I was like, I wanna read a book that's a portal fantasy but for adults, and this book was like OH here's everything you wanted.
It's about a grad student, Nora, who has totally stalled out on her dissertation and is at a shitty wedding when she accidentally wanders through a portal into a beautiful, fantastical fairy world. At first, everything is amazing and literally perfect...but surprise surprise, not all as is it seems, and soon everything goes to, how should I put it, shit. Nora escapes, but rather than returning home, she finds herself trapped in a far more dreary realm. But not one without it's own charms and it's own magic, and Nora finds herself the student-slash-sorta-captive of the crochety, sexy, maybe-killed-his-wife magician Aruendiel* and she begins to learn magic herself.
Unlike the above books, this is not a fast-paced, twisty book, and I think if you go into this expecting high fantasy along the lines of Game of Thrones, you may be disappointed. It's not really a typical high-fantasy novel, it's more of a cross of an 18th/19th century realist novel, a fairy tale, and a fantasy novel. But if you want that, then it's REALLY good! I loved this book! And the magic in it is so cool, something about the way its described feels so visceral and real and like you could really do it if you just tried hard enough. There is a romance and it's totally, intentionally hashtag problematic, but it's very laid back, very slow burn, so I think even if you aren't a person who digs romance you can still enjoy this. If you're looking for a feminist-leaning fantasy novel that you can just sink into and lose yourself in, this is the perfect book. You will long to magically fix broken plates.
5) The Ruthless Lady's Guide to Wizardry by C.M. Waggoner
Honestly I can't even justify why I think this one is an autumn book. It simply is. It's autumn colored in my head. It is the coziest book I have ever read about necromancy and crime. Also I just want to recommend it. This is another one that I listened to as an audiobook and it's also a good audiobook, for those who are interested. But it also means I will not be able to spell absolutely any of the character's names.
This novel follows Delly, an enterprising young scoundrel of a fire witch with a teeny tiny gin habit as she attempts to support herself and her hot-mess of a mom in the roughest neighborhoods of Fantasy-City-That-I-Can't-Remember-The-Name-Of. Lice...gate? When Delly comes across an advertisement for a bodyguarding job for young women for a hefty fee, it seems like the answer to definitely not all but at least some of her problems. She accepts, along with an interesting assortment of other sorcerous young ladies, including a wonderfully bitchy Absentia (my love), a young woman who can turn into a boar, boar girl's necromancer mother, and the very sexy part-troll Winn, who in my imagination looks like Gwendoline Christie and talks like Miranda Hart. Which. Perfect woman. Winn being a fine, wealthy young lady, Delly can't help but think to herself that it wouldn't be such a bad thing if Winn happened to fall in love with her and carried her off to be rich and spoiled the rest of her life.
Of course, things quickly don't go to plan, and soon Delly and her companions find herself caught up in wicked schemes of murder, drugs, and an undead mouse named Buttons who says BONG. I love Buttons SO MUCH.
This book is just a silly romp of a novel which worms into your heart and your brain. It's fun and cute and gay, and also it made me cry. I haven't stopped thinking, "Not quite regulation hammerball" since I listened to it like half a year ago.
Also, while I'm here, this novel is set in the same world as and features a few of the same characters as Unnatural Magic. Which is also a hell of a book. Literally the best bisexual relationship I have ever fuckin read. It's a winter book tho, so I simply can't go into it here.
Aaaaand...that it's! Happy autumnal reading :)
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