#lost my mind

[skinnypaleangryperson]

My heart is broken over this gray world and this life dedicated to slavery by selfish people who are just playing sheep differently taking control of me and paying me so little that I can't even have a decent personal life to make up for crushed creative dreams. I hurt myself with my own imagination and how vivid it is, the TV shows that I would have liked to work on an extended with my passion and ideas, the artistry the lights, the emotion the storytelling, the storyboards and the artistic lighting that I work on every day simply because it's all that makes sense to me. These images, thoughts, storytelling, emotions, everything where I pour all of my desperation of what I wish the humanity and connection that my life would have into a couple of iPad drawings every day in the corner of an empty bedroom.

It comes across as melodramatic posting about it online, but if you were to live a day in my life with having nothing except for my raw isolated imagination in such a repetitive, soulless, compassionless gray world, where I have no connection to anyone anymore, and no one that I can share anything with and convinced I will never have a true friendship or relationship with anyone outside of baseline tolerance at best again, on top of failed motherhood and a failed creative career, you would be crying out on the internet every second you got the chance to. I haven't wanted to live this life for the longest time that I could remember, and I will never want to again. In a sense, thank God nobody cares and that I can just post about it at whatever whim that I want throughout the miserable day, because this is the only place left where I can still feel somewhat human, and where I can just be as unashamedly detailed about every single depressed and morbidly despairing thought, share some of my work, even if it's only to myself just to prove that it even exists outside of my own sick corner of the world, and generally to feel seen for a little while, Even if only by myself, which is what me and the majority of people in working class America have, with no way out, because we're not "special", And if you have an artistic vision it will break your heart more than anything else.

I especially love this scene that I came up with it during my on maladaptive daydreaming lately with my family with BoJack and Samantha and Harper. The storylines that I come up with his family and with our girls are always incredibly vivid every single day and they both still simultaneously break my heart, because I know that the vision that I share in the passion that I have and my want to share in storytelling will only ever be an ongoing sickly headspace in the back of my head while the gray reality of a life that has long since over if it ever began goes on around me without change. The beauty of the family life that I wanted to have on top of the creative dreams that I have that has projected itself into the muddled mental disorder of maladaptive daydreaming of my beautiful family with Bojack both is the only thing that keeps me going throughout the empty slave hours of my life, which is so lonely that most people I'm convinced would not be able to live it, well at the same time fills me with such a beauty and meaning taking it in that I couldn't ever let it go.

#bojack #maladaptive daydreaming #🫡 #Lost my mind #I mostly just use social media to grieve these days while I continue to live the graveyard of my life in reality #My life failed beyond comprehension in every possible way

[vane-sya]

Lost my mind by AsyaYordanova

#my edit #b&w #lost my mind #asyayordanova #monochrome #black and white #dark art #dark fantasy

[musicalchaos07]

I got a stranger things Advent calendar bc I'm an adult with disposable income and it came with these stickers and they're soooooo

Like what do I do with them like I can only stick them once (there's other stickers of the rest of the party but this isn't about them)

#MIKE WITH THE LIGHTNING #ARE FRIENDS ELECTRIC #UM HELP #anyways Imagine you're me opening this and the stickers were folded just so it was only them #lost my mind #stranger things #personal #will byers #mike wheeler #byler #< target audience

[swiftlydnp]

god the japan honeymoon viddy was just as gross and married as i thought it would be more even

#lost my mind #japan anecdotes literally the whole video #them saying upfront they were living vicariously through dab and evan???? #this video was crazyyyy #sanj rambles #they're gross (affectionate) #dan and phil

[sebbys-mama]

"You're the words on my lips that have left

But I still seem to taste"

Alice Kristiansen- Lost My Mind

#alice kristiansen #lost my mind #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #aziraphale good omens #aziraphale loves crowley #good omens #good omens 2

[lifeofafreckledredhead]

I lost everything loving you

I lost my sanity

I lost My identity

I lost my standards

I lost my morals

I lost my boundaries

I lost myself loving you

A.Val

#poet #sad thoughts #lost my mind #mental health #emotional abuse #narcissistic abuse #living with ptsd #ptsd recovery #abuse survivor #abuse victim #alcholic #loving an addict #addiction #sadnees #sad poetry #sadgirl #sad poem #sad quotes #self sabotage #selfish #self help #self care #self love #lost #heart been broke so many times #you broke my fucking heart #im exhausted #lose it #i love him #mental illness

[thanos-the-dad-titan]

#mads mikkelsen #hannibal #hannibal lecter #pikachu #goofy #funny #insane #lost my mind #coocoo #koo coo #crazy

[willgrahamscock]

what are u thinking about. alex what are u thinking about

you KNOW what i'm going to say.

society if they let Will tell Hannibal that it is good to see him.

#wtfannibal #alex answers #hannibal #LOST MY MIND

[stuffforme2]

I TOOK MATTERS INTO MY OWN HANDS AND MADE A HOTEL VALHALLA DISCORD BECAUSE I COULDNT FIND ONE.

https://discord.com/invite/xgtRrKAr

#hotel valhalla #magnus chase #pjo fandom #pjo headcanon #pjo series #pjo #pjo hoo #pjo hoo toa #pjoverse #trials of apollo #percy jackson and the heroes of olympus #heroes of olympus #please #discord chat #discord roleplay #lost my mind

[kayakovicyoo]

"It's about a girl who gets turned into a swan and she needs love to break the spell, but her prince falls for the wrong girl so she kills herself."

#black swan 2010 #black swan #natalie portman #darren aronofsky #ballerina #dark femininity #horror girls #girlblogging #horrorwomensource #ballet #horror #losing my mind #losing myself #im losing it #lost my mind #thriller #cult movies #cult film #dark movies

[blackstarchanx3new]

FSR characters getting their cheese squished compilation because it happens so often I can make a damn compilation X'DDDDD

90% of the time it's Vio lmfao.

HE'S JUST CUTE GETTING HIS FACE SQUISHED OKAY!?!??!?!?!?

Shadow being disapointed he can't also get hugs from Zelda makes me laugh every time I see that.

Yes Blue...Squish him. X'D

Well all remember how Green forgot what personal space was for a minute right? X'D

Could not have said it better myself Blue.

Lmao Green's sleepy he has an excuse. Vio's just a slut.

Little Shadow is so stinking cute tho.

I'm literally losing my shit at this point I did not realize how often I did this. This could be a drinking game I can't-

WHY DO I DRAW THIS SO FREQUENTLY!?

I have zero justification for this lmfao.

I cannot explain why I do this so often.

#Lost my mind #literally started laughing #FSR #fsr au #four swords returns #four swords returns au #loz fsr au #loz

[heyitsspaceace]

when carla said “i wonder who i’d be without you” i got WAR FLASHBACKS. WAR FLASHBACKS I TELL YOU

#LOST MY MIND #THIS SPECIAL #AHHHHH #doctor who #dr who #dw #doctor who christmas special #the church on ruby road #the doctor #ncuti gatwa #millie gibson #thoschei #the master #the master x the doctor #the doctor x the master

[nano20030601]

hello hello hello

happy new year and good health for everyone

Today's dump is sponsored by the need to bite that neck

ur welcome

#fernando alonso #fa14 #formula 1 #look at him #f1 #mofo has always been servin #want to suck him dry #his blood #obviously #lost my mind #and i was feral #monday nano dump

[breelynnxoxoxo]

WHAT’S A GIRL TO DO? 💋💋💋

#lost my top #lost my mind #blonde temptation #blonde attraction #blonde ambition #long blonde hair #take my body for your pleasure #enjoy my body #take me i'm yours

[yori-the-artist]

Hat is finished!!!

25hours of work made this beauty.

#art #top hat #wip #hat #will wood #will wood and the tapeworms #art wip #lost my mind

[deafeningsoulpeachrebel]

To those who have commented on my posts I want you to know that I can't reply as my account is set up. I'm not a bot or someone who thinks that what others have to say is unimportant, to the contrary I've learned that listening to others is something that I wish I had been doing over the years.

In case anyone is interested, I'm just a simple person who has been rebuilding my life after nearly losing it a few years ago. I'm still broken but I've learned what's important in my life and what I need. The world is unhinged at the moment and we should all try to love each other because we're all in this mess together.

When I was starting to find my way out of the hell I found myself in someone suggested that I watch a particular movie. It's called "Safety Not Guaranteed" and for some reason it was what I needed at the time and now I like to think that I'm going to build my own time machine to see if I can change the past. I'm only half joking but I've learned that you have to believe in the goodness of people and have faith in humanity.

Sorry for my poorly written rant but it's how I feel about my life right now and I don't want anyone who has commented to think that I don't smile when I read your words. Thank you for that. For the person who really changed my life I keep believing that what is meant to be will be. I've had a lot of people say that I should write a book about my life but I don't think anyone would find it interesting and besides my grammar and composition is still in 8th grade staring out of the window and daydreaming about the world.

If anyone has read this I want to thank you. For the person who was there when I lost my way I'm still waiting for a hug.

#old house #oddities #weird shit #lost my mind