#lol I'm sure last time I mentioned what I was reading in a similar tag it was also Lovecraft

[unseenacademic]

20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by my dear, talented friend @mihrsuri Thanks, friend! 💜💜💜💜 1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 13 at the moment 😅

2. What's your total Ao3 word count? 28,823

3. What fandoms do you write for? The West Wing.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? The First Lady - my ongoing fic where I answer the most important question in the world: what was Abbey Bartlet doing during the episodes she didn't appear in?

Josh and the Jackass - what happened right before Governor Bartlet decided to follow Josh to the airport in In the Shadow of Two Gunmen.

Breathe - a post-ep for Dead Irish Writers. Her birthday party is over, and Abbey Bartlet must face the New Hampshire Medical Board.

A Bit Desperate - part three of a series of three-sentence fics about Abbey and Jed in the aftermath of Zoey's kidnapping.

Anything Else I Need to Know - Five times the staff of Bartlet for America interrupted a barbecuing session and one time CJ interrupted a different kind of session. Takes place during the First Bartlet Campaign.

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes, I do. I do my best to respond to every comment I get, as fast as I can. It's a two-way street, we, as fic authors, often complain (and rightly so) about the lack of feedback, the lack of comments and kudos, but we don't respond to comments. As a reader, I am more likely to comment on a fic from an author who's replied to my comments earlier. But I guess I get so few comments that I can easily respond to all of them 🤷‍♀️ and since there are like 7 people who care about what I write, the least I can do is respond to their very kind comments 💜💜

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I guess it's Anything Else I Need to Know. The ending isn't too angsty by itself, but if you put it into context and you know the overarching plot of first few seasons of TWW, it's definitely angsty. Honorable mentions: With Pomp and Parade & And the Silence Haunts our Bedchamber - they both deal with the aftermath of Zoey's kidnapping.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? White Christmas. And Something for Us to Remember too also qualifies. You have to read them to know why 😊😉

8. Do you get hate on fics? Luckily, I'm not popular or interesting enough for that 😅

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes! Oh, all kinds! The worst thing I've ever written came before I started my fanfic writing career (I used to be involved in forum RP, I'm less active there now) and... nope, I'm not going to write about it here. Too cursed. 🙈🙈 If you want to see some sane smut I've written, check out Game On, Boyfriend! I hope I'll write another barbecuing fic soon, so stay tuned.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I don't. But I'd love to see a TWW/NCIS crossover.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? I hope not.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but if anyone's interested, go ahead.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, I haven't. The closest thing to co-writing fics was RP-ing which is sort of similar, but not really lol. It might be fun, so if anyone's interested in writing with me, let me know.

14. What's your all time favorite ship? Abbey/Jed! There are many ships I love, but I have to go with my horny nerds.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? There was a WIP I started last year, the first fic I posted, but I ended up deleting it, so it's not very likely that I'll ever finish it.

16. What are your writing strengths? I'm really, really good at research lol! If I'm writing a fic set in the 1960s, I'll make sure that they're eating food, wearing clothes, listening to music etc. that was popular in that period. You won't catch any of my characters wearing historically inaccurate shoes. I'm also really good at digging up random canon details and writing thousands of words around them.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Plot lmao. I write fics about nothing, it's just banter and nerdiness, with the characters and/or the author showing off 🤣🤣

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Hmmm... I don't know, don't think I've ever needed to do it, but I guess it depends on what I want to achieve, I might write it in English and add a dialogue tag like "she said in French" or something.

19. First fandom you wrote for? The first fandom I published a fic for was The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck, but the first fandom I wrote for was Harry Potter.

20. Favorite fic you've written? Can't choose only one, so have a few of them:

Breathe: Once again, Abbey is reminded how cruel the world can be towards women. 

No one asked Jed what he was wearing when he took the censure. 

Anything Else I Need to Know: Josh finally opens the door to his room and slumps on his unmade bed.

Next time, he’s going to pay attention. He’s going to pay attention to Mrs. Landingham’s notes on the Governor's schedule. And he’s going to pay attention to Mrs. Landingham’s instructions, so he’ll know what her notes on the Governor’s schedule actually mean. Next time, he’s going to pay attention.

Had Josh been paying attention, he would’ve noticed when the Governor dashed across the hall and up the stairs right after lunch. Had he been paying attention, he would’ve noticed Leo’s smirk that followed the Governor’s departure. Had he been paying attention, perhaps he would’ve noticed the soft, rhythmic squeaking of the bed and muffled gasps and groans coming from the Bartlets’ suite right before he opened the door.

Well, too bad that Josh wasn’t paying attention.

And Something for Us to Remember too: “I take it your conversation with Doug didn’t go well?”

“I spoke slowly and I didn’t use big words, but I couldn’t talk him out of marrying Liz. Maybe I should’ve taken him on a hike. A six-hour hike through Vermont wilderness in the dead of winter would’ve changed his mind.”

“It wasn’t a six-hour anything! I was there, Jed, you were only gone for two hours.”

“You weren’t there, Abigail, you were baking with your mother, while I was fighting for dear life, braving the cold and wolves and bears.” He sighs and adds, “Guess it’s too late to take Doug hiking now and leave him for the bears.”

White Christmas: “’She – New Hampshire – is one of the two best states in the Union. Vermont’s the other’, said Robert Frost, your favorite poet, who also happened to be the poet laureate of Vermont.” Abbey made a dramatic pause and gave Jed a pointed look.

“She’s one of the two best states in the Union. Vermont’s the other.” She continued her performance. “And the two… the two lie like wedges, thick end to thin end and thin end to thick end.”

Jed chuckled.

“Sweet Knees, we’ll lie like wedges, thick end to thin end and thin end to thick end any time you want,” he leered at her, “on our bed, in front of the fireplace, on the kitchen table…” his smirk grew when Abbey’s lips curved into a little smile and her cheeks flushed, “but Robert Frost named his poetry collection New Hampshire, not Vermont.”

“Well, I’m going to write the words ‘Freedom and Unity’ on the pie and you’re going to eat them!”

The First Lady: “Mrs. Landingham withholds food from me,” he complained.

“Because I asked her to.”

“Yeah, cause you don’t want me eating real food like steaks or hamburgers. She won’t let me have a banana.”

“I’m sure you did something to piss her off.” Abbey shrugged.

“Do you two enjoy torturing me?”

“Yes,” she said innocently.

Tagging (no pressure!): @claudiajcregg @onekisstotakewithme @hondagirll @miabicicletta @librarianmouse @holy-ships-x-red-lips

💜💜💜💜💜💜

#20 questions for fic writers #my fic #the west wing #abbey bartlet #mrs doctor abbey first lady doctor #abbey x jed

[sunstaar]

Third Time's the Charm

Shikamaru x gn!reader

Hiiii :)

So I just wanted to tell you I've been reading your blog for the past 7 hours haha it's almost 4 am here in Mexico were I'm from and your writing is SOOOOO good I'm obsessed, I love how you write Kakashi 🥰🥰🥰

And well so I just wanted to ask you, if it's not too much trouble, if you could write something with Shikamaru since I am sucker for him, something like the reader and him get on each other's nerves all the time, like they are so similar and there's this rivalry, Kakashi is fully aware that they have feelings for each other lol, reader and Shika go on a mission and you get injured and he takes care of your wound and he's so gentle about it that it makes reader question everything now. I know it's kind of specific, and honestly you don't have to do it, just something with Shika would be amazing, anything, that was just a thought

And seriously thank you for the amazing content 💓💓

Thank you so much for your request! I'm glad you enjoyed my writing, I really appreciate it! This took a bit longer than expected to write, but I do hope you enjoy it nonetheless. Also, I should note that along the way of me writing this, it became more and more dramatic... and the wound kind of escalated at one point? I did attempt to steer this into a more gentle way and I do hope it worked, at least somewhat...

Word Count: 5,3k

Warning: mentions of death, violence

tags: @smelllikeme , Ao3

Summary: They say third time's the charm, and Shikamaru hopes it is enough to save you.

Shikamaru could still vividly remember the day his sensei Asuma had died in his arms. As though the memory was burned into his brain, it came to haunt him in his sleep time and time again, nourishing his doubts and regrets, harvesting his heartbreak. Each time the dream came to haunt him, it appeared more vivid than the last time, so much so that Shikamaru could feel the blood of his sensei on his hand again and the way the older man’s body shivered in his last moments. The sombré tone of Asuma was etched into the memory, accompanied by the gruff undertone the dark-haired man always spoke with. His last words most importantly, Shikamaru felt as though they were in his heart, something he would never forget, and take with him to his grave.

The future head of the Nara clan could also remember how his father had died during the Fourth Shinobi War. The way Ino beside him cried out at the loss of her own father shook his mind to the core and had his heart sinking to the bottom of his stomach, bile beginning to crawl up his throat. His mind was in shambles, but he was required to get right back to work and push away all of his sorrow and his grief so they could win the war. Only at the grave of his father, his sobbing mother standing beside him did Shikamaru get a moment to allow his grief to swallow him, almost drowning in it to the point he couldn’t breathe.

The sensation of death surrounding his entire being was something Shikamaru never wanted to feel again. It was a feeling he despised with all his being.

Following the death of two of the most important people in his life, two men to whom he had looked up since childhood, and whom he had set as an example for himself, Shikamaru vowed that under no circumstance, he would ever let someone important to him die again. At all cost, even when it meant he would endanger his own health, he would make sure that those dear to him would make it to see the light of another day, live to wake up in Konoha, and get back onto their feet.

To his dismay, death, however, was a treacherous thing, one that did not listen to the prayers and vows of the people. It did not matter to death what Shikamaru promised, neither did it matter what the dark-haired man intended to do. As a mere man, Shikamaru did not stand above danger and near-death situations, a lesson he soon learned during a mission alongside you.

When he strode into the Hokage’s office one morning, the smell of cigarettes lingering around his body, and his hands buried deep into the pockets of his pants, Shikamaru had not expected the man to hand him a mission instead of paperwork.

The Hokage had always been a walking enigma, mystery shrouded around him. So, Shikamaru shouldn’t have expected anything else but a surprise awaiting him.

His first clue to something being different had been the sight of you in the Hokage’s office, sitting on one of the two chairs placed in front of the desk. Despite only being able to see your back as he entered, that little piece of information was enough to identify you. Maybe it was the way you slouched in your chair that gave Shikamaru the necessary clue, or the exact shade of your (h/c) that he could never forget even if he wanted to. Either way, his expression morphed into one of recognition as soon as he saw you sitting there.

Without saying anything, Shikamaru made his way over to the chair beside yours and sat down, ignoring how you scrunched up your nose in response. There was a curious gleam in the Hokage’s eyes, but neither Shikamaru nor you could tell what exactly it indicated. His gaze flickered between the two of you, his charcoal eyes settling last on the piece of paper laying on his desk to skim over it quickly before talking to the two of you.

With a smirk playing on his lips, not visible to either of you, Kakashi leaned back in his seat. “Do either of you know why I asked you to come?”

You were the first to narrow your eyes. “To go on a mission, I presume?” Once you glanced over at the raven-haired man sitting beside you, the smell of cigarettes still lingering on his vest. Then, you forced yourself to focus on the Hokage again, trying to keep yourself from frowning visibly. “Together, most likely.”

Merely from how you strained the first word, the Hokage could tell your lack of enthusiasm when it came to the mission. That was no surprise to him, he already had expected such a reaction from both you and Shikamaru, so he paid it no mind. He was following his very own mission, after all, and not even the two of you disagreeing would keep him from continuing on with it.

“I chose the two of you to complete this mission because it is of importance,” Kakashi began, sitting a little straighter in his seat now. He really could have chosen anyone besides you and Shikamaru, but neither of you needed to know that fact and potentially mess with his meddling. “And I trust you to complete it. Together.”

Both of you had to swallow down the groans of annoyance you were about to let out. It had to be a joke, didn’t it? An unnecessary joke from the Hokage himself, in that case.

“Don’t you two look at me like that,” Kakashi felt like he was reprimanding two children, not two of the most capable and intelligent Shinobi. He shot both of them a warning look before he slid the information slip across the table for them to take, deciding that briefing them now would cause him more of a headache. “The mission begins tomorrow. I expect the two of you to get a good night’s sleep and head off early in the morning.”

Kakashi did not even need to dismiss the two of you, as you both willingly left the Hokage’s office without a word to him or each other. The first to go had been Shikamaru, who stood up as soon as he had skimmed over the paper, pushing his chair back with a loud screech, before he pushed the door to Kakashi’s office open and left. You quickly followed suit, with a few seconds of difference so you wouldn’t run into the dark-haired male when outside of the office. The silence remaining was loud, to say the least, and left the room colder than it was before.

(That did not have the Hokage doubt his meddling, not even in the slightest as Shizune could see as soon as she entered the room with a cup of tea in her hand.)

The raven-haired woman let out a sigh, placing her hands on her hips as soon as she sat down the tea on his desk. “What did you do now?” From the gleam in his charcoal eyes alone she could see he was up to something.

Kakashi leaned back against his chair, stretching out his legs and arms, listening to his joints cracking in the process. His playful gaze settled on Shizune, a twinkle in his eyes. “Oh, you know, nothing.”

Shizune knew that he was lying, and couldn’t help but worry about what the man was brewing up.

You could still remember when you first met Shikamaru back in the academy when the two of you had still been young children starting their way of being a Shinobi. To you, it was like the memory was burned into your brain, something you knew you’d never forget due to the significance of that day to you.

Your first crush you would never forget, anyway.

Already within the first few months of starting the academy, you had begun to develop a crush on the raven-haired boy from your class. You weren’t sure what it had been that had pulled you to the Nara, whether it had been his unmatchable intelligence, or his lazy attempts at humor, which often came out dry, you didn’t know. At his witty jokes, you often were the first and only student to laugh, the only one to understand it immediately and also find it funny. Your attention was always drawn to him, your eyes always finding a way to settle on his slouched figure. Your chin would rest on your hand as you daydream of some kind of future together, wistful sighs pushing past your lips.

Something just drew you to him. You couldn’t exactly explain when your crush on him blossomed to become something fully fletched, you could only build your tower of hopes and dreams, and continue to stare at him during class with your lovesick gaze.

Little you had thought of Shikamaru as cute and adorable. Just as many of your other classmates did, like Sakura and Ino, you attempted different combinations of your name with his, meshing them together, writing your first name in combination with his last name, or even hyphenating both of your names. Little hearts quickly joined your messy ideas, little love notes adding to your expression of feelings, or in that case, lack of open and honest expression of feelings.

(To say the least, you had been head over heels for the genius boy since early childhood).

At one point, everything had begun to change, however. You would pinpoint the time of change to around the Chuunin exams, specifically the first round of the one-versus-one fights. It was the round in which you lost in a one versus one against Shikamaru, shame coursing through you as embarrassment had your cheeks feeling warm, your head cast downward as you accepted your defeat.

It wasn’t even that you were a bad Shinobi or one below average, because that wasn’t the case, not at all. Rather, you couldn’t match Shikamaru’s wit and intelligence, the two qualities you had so dearly admired, which had become your downfall on your way to becoming a Chuunin. They became the qualities you too, wished to possess, qualities you were becoming jealous of, and you thought of as necessary to be a Chuunin.

With the help of your understanding and supporting sensei, you were determined to become better than the boy who, unbeknownst to him, crushed your heart during the exams. It had taken some time without a doubt, but every second you spend gaining knowledge was worth it when you finally caught up with the raven-haired later and became a Chuunin without even losing one round.

The climb was hard, there was no doubt there, but the result was a better version of you, one determined not to allow their heart to be broken again, one that wished to be better than the boy who did so.

All of your hard feelings toward Shikamaru, mixed with the jealousy you felt toward his abilities brought you to this point: a mission with him. This happening would’ve been little you’s dream, and yet, for obvious reasons, you couldn’t help but feel annoyed at the prospect of having to go on a mission with Shikamaru.

What if you embarrassed yourself again, or something worse happened? You couldn’t cope with that, you would most likely sink into the ground from all the embarrassment. So, you were yet again determined, determined to be better than him.

During the mission, you couldn’t slack up, you knew that which was why you chose not to engage in any witty banter stemming from Shikamaru. On your way to the mission’s location, you ignored the few words leaving the raven-haired’s mouth, but listened nonetheless, little you rather excited to learn more about the Nara.

Halfway to your destination, the silence between the two of you had become unbearable. You were basically itching to say something, anything really, to break the silence and to have it stop. But you kept tight-lipped.

The green trees around the two of you became shades darker the further you were walking into the thick forest surrounding Konoha, leaving your home further behind you with every step you took. Walking under the large shades of the trees felt somewhat peaceful to both you and Shikamaru, the harsh sunlight of the summer sun no longer blinding either of you or burning your skin. The longer the two of you walked, however, the path seemed to grow smaller and smaller, the trees growing closer to what was supposed to be the path. It was like the forest was pushing you together, or so you thought as your shoulders accidentally bumped.

“Sorry!” You squeaked out immediately, your cheeks feeling warmer upon contact. Why did you have to be that clumsy, again? “Didn’t mean to.”

And here you were embarrassing yourself of all things, making the mission more uncomfortable than it already was.

Shikamaru cleared his throat, his eyes flittering to look over at you, before looking away again. “It’s fine.” He said, his hands twitching in his pockets, as though he was itching to do something. You noticed, though didn’t say anything.

You were walking shoulder by shoulder by now, the close proximity of the trees forcing you to do so, not knowing that neither of you would get to say something else to the other before everything went to shit.

Neither of you had seen the attack coming, as both of you were lost in your own bubble of thought concerning one another. It wasn’t professional to do of either of you, since both of your attention should have been dedicated to protecting yourself and your partner on your way to the destination instead, and yet, here both of you were, about to be ambushed because of your own lack of attention.

The first indication that you aren’t alone in the forest came from one of the trees, a small rustling of the leaves that sounded too big to be of a bird. Shikamaru stopped you in your step, his hand grasping your upper arms to keep you from moving forward. Both of you were now alert when it came to your surroundings, the hairs on your arms standing up from the chill running down your spine.

It didn’t take long for the intruders to reveal themselves, sly smirks tugging at their lips, the upper part of their faces covered with masks, holes cut within them to leave their eyes uncovered. While the men and women looked ridiculous, it was no time to laugh as they pulled out their knives and got ready to perform Jutsu.

“If you want to enter, you’ll have to go through us first.” spoke the leader of the group, his tone deep and intended to sound threatening.

The woman beside him twirled a knife in her hand, adding, “We don’t let people pass without a price being paid first, that goes without saying.”

You weren’t nervous at all about the impending confrontation, not at all, really. You not only trusted yourself and your capabilities but also the ones of Shikamaru. Regardless of that, your hand moved to where your own knife lay against your hip. “And what would be said price?”

For a mere moment, shock crossed the features of the woman, but she was quick to revert her facial expression back to one of nonchalance. “You’re Konoha Shinobi, eh?” It was a question that required no answer from either of you. “You must have a lot of money to give to us, then.”

That statement couldn’t be more wrong if it tried to be. Following the Fourth Shinobi War, the financial situation was dire for everyone, even including yourself and the future Nara clan head.

From the peripheral of your vision, you could see Shikamaru hatch out a plan. Due to the location of the ambush, it was obvious who of the two of you was at an advantage. There were more shadows than necessary surrounding all of you, meaning Shikamaru could perfectly use his clan’s Hiden Jutsu. He only needed to not be caught.

To give him more time to act, you chose to act a bit less rational than you would’ve preferred to. Instead of having your hand simply remain near the knife on your hip, you chose to draw it and point it at the woman opposite you, the blade of it gleaming in the few bits of sunlight managing to protrude through the many treetops.

The woman took a step back but did not deter from her mission.

“Don’t trick us, Shinobi!” growled one of the other men of the ambush, his knife now drawn toward you. You refused to flinch and stood your ground. “Drop the knife! Now! Or you’ll get it!”

Admittedly, you were beginning to feel a little nervous with one more knife pointed at you, but you fully trusted Shikamaru to perfectly execute the plan. While it would be rather difficult for him to catch all four of the intruders all at once, you were sure that he would be able to do so, if you were only able to buy him more time.

You refused to drop your knife and instead spoke in a calm voice, “We don’t have that kind of money.” It was true, neither of you had barely any money with you.

“I’m sure we’ll find a solution then,” spoke the leader, his voice deep enough to send a shiver down your spine. “You,” He pointed over at you, “will stay here, with us, while you,” Now he pointed at Shikamaru, “will get us the money we ask for, alright?”

You shot a glance at Shikamaru, the worry gleaming in your eyes saying more than a thousand words. It would be best to strike now, the raven-haired decided before any of the four intruders dared to try anything dangerous. 

As fast as he could, Shikamaru allowed his shadow to spread out all across the ground of the forest and to connect with the shadows of your opponents, to trap them in a certain position. As soon as he heard the first gasp coming from the man with the knife, Shikamaru knew that he had been successful. The man was quick to drop his knife onto the ground, barely missing his foot. The woman, the leader, and another man, who so far has made no comment, were quick to follow suit, stuck in the position as Shikamaru wanted them to.

Shikamaru shot the four of them a smirk, unaware of what would be coming next.

From high above in the trees, came a silver glint toward the two of you, specifically toward Shikamaru. Your eyes immediately picked up on the glint coming toward you, meant to knock out Shikamaru and free the four intruders. If you were the knock the Nara out of the way, you knew that his Shadow Jutsu would break the moment you made contact with him, allowing the four to not only attack you but also rob you and then flee. Would you take the hit, however, none of that would happen and if you were fortunate enough, you could still knock those four out later.

Maybe it was the little you had buried deep inside you long ago thinking and acting, or maybe you never lost your feelings for Shikamaru, but you moved in front of him without much more thought. His eyes widened as he saw the glint coming toward you now and hit you in the chest, a gasp pushing past your lips as you hunched over, attempting to breathe.

Shikamaru’s shadow immediately climbed up the tree and also managed to interweave with the shadow of the last man standing, also trapping him in his Jutsu.

You, meanwhile, had more and more trouble breathing, the cackles of the five intruders sounding distant, almost blurry to you. Anger and frustration were both coursing through your body as you formed the finger sings necessary for the Wind Jutsu you were about to perform. Breathing was becoming increasingly difficult, so as you breathed in to gather enough air for your Jutsu, it felt as though your lungs were on fire. You ignored the pain you were feeling and finished your Jutsu, knocking over all four of them with a wall of wind, sending them flying against trees and knocking them out in the process.

You yourself could barely hold your own weight up, so as soon as you made sure that Shikamaru was save without needing your aid, your knees buckled underneath your voice and you fell to the forest ground, desperately gasping for air to fill your lungs.

Shikamaru yelled out your name, but you could barely hear him in all the panic you were feeling. Blood was rushing to your ears, making Shikamaru’s voice almost inaudible as you with your back against the ground, your eyes staring up at the trees as your vision blurred with tears.

“Breathe,” Shikamaru told you, placing his hand on your shoulder to rub it in circles to get you to calm down. “You need to breathe, (Name). Calm down.” His gaze traveled over to your wound, and while the wound itself was not life-threatening, the knife appeared to have been poisoned. No wonder you were reacting like that.

Ever since his sensei and father died, Shikamaru never was the greatest at calming people down in a difficult situation, especially when they were hyperventilating as you were. “Somewhere in the bag is an antidote, (Name), but until I prepared it, you need to breathe, okay?” He could see the tears rolling down your cheeks and the panic so clear in your eyes, and yet, he couldn’t help you in any way.

As quickly as he could, Shikamaru began rummaging through the bag in search of an antidote, specifically the two vials of antidotes given to him by Konoha’s very own poison specialist before the mission began. As soon as he found it, he was confronted with another problem: Which was the right vial to give to you?

From merely seeing the knife, he couldn’t tell what kind of poison was coating it. On the other hand, he couldn’t pull it out either in fear of you bleeding to death as soon as he did so. His heartbeat began increasing, anxiety pumping through his blood as he considered his options.

You felt like your whole body was on fire by now. Pained screeches pushed past your lips, tears falling from your eyes as your body spasmed on the floor, you crying out in pain. Your gaze was set on an unsure Shikamaru, the raven-haired man in a situation he had never been confronted with before, and in spite of his undeniable wit, he found finding a solution rather difficult.

“Help… me…” You could barely speak, your throat scratchy and voice coming out in a mere pained whisper. Your breaths came out erratic and without a pattern, as though you were clawing for air to enter your lungs.

You couldn’t die like this! Not only was this a mortifying way to go, in front of the now man you’ve crushed on as a child, but also rather pathetic. You wanted to die a happy death, after managing to confess your feelings to someone you would consider to be the love of your life. You didn’t want to pass on with so many regrets, things you wished you had done sooner.

Maybe back then you just should have taken the leap of faith and confessed to Shikamaru, told him that you liked him.

By now, you also couldn’t tell anymore what was going on. Your vision was completely blurred from all of the tears streaming down your face. You could only hear Shikamaru scrambling around you, moving constantly and muttering inaudible words under his breath. You only regained somewhat of a sense of orientation as soon as a needle penetrated your skin, making you hiss loudly.

“It’s going to be alright.” Shikamaru told you, another attempt to calm you down.

You nodded, unable to speak a word of confirmation. Wholeheartedly, you believed in the genius as your body began to calm down a little. It felt like you could breathe again, air entering your lungs. That was, at least, until everything went to shit again.

Out of nowhere, you began crying again, your body feeling as though it had been set on fire another time. You convulsed, screeched, and let out noises of pain, returning to a state worse than the one before.

“Shit,” Shikamaru cursed, taking in a panicked breath. “Why isn’t this working?” He wiped the layer of sweat forming on his forehead with the back of his hand, attempting to clear his mind to think.

He could distantly remember what the poison specialist had once taught him during the war, the words somewhat saved in his brain, words he never recalled before. “These antidotes work best if the poisonous object is removed from the body. Some poisons flare up when in contact with the antidote, so remove the object if the first dose doesn’t work. Just be careful while doing so.” And while it was dangerous to do so, it appeared to be the only way to save you.

“Pull… out… knife,” You told him as though you had been able to read his thoughts, gasping for air after each word. “Trust… you.” You were well aware of the fact that there was a chance that his Jutsu would not work, that you would bleed out here, poisoned on the floor of the forest, but something told you to trust him.

The last time his mind had been this close to falling apart into shambles had been when hearing his father speak to him, death coming closer to the man. His heartbeat had increased drastically and blood rushed in his ears, he could barely focus on anything but his father. The same could be said for when Asuma died, Shikamaru’s heart feeling as though at any moment it may break apart.

At that moment, Shikamaru knew that as soon as he managed to bring you out of the life-threatening situation, he would confess his feelings to you one day. He couldn’t lose a loved one again, it would hurt too much. He refused to give up on you.

They say third time's the charm, so he should be able to save you. If the saying held any truth to it, you shouldn’t be the one to die in his arms or continue to suffocate as by now your hands were beginning to desperately claw at your throat.

Your only hope would be now the bits of medical ninjutsu Ino had taught him in case of an emergency. He was regretting not having listened to his blonde teammate more intentively than he should have.

Shikamaru carefully wrapped his hand around the handle of the knife so he could pull out it. You hissed as he did so, a noise that made his wince. “I’m going to pull it out now, alright?” He attempted to create eye contact between the two of you, but your eyes were filled with too many tears to even get a hint of your surroundings. “One… Two.. Three.” In one pull, Shikamaru pulled the knife out and threw it beside you.

There was only one antidote left that he could give to you, but first, he had to close the wound with medical ninjutsu. His hands were shaking more than he wanted them to, your crimson blood splattered across them. Shikamaru set his growing panic aside and hovered his hand above the wound, using each and every technique Ino ever taught him. His hands were beginning to glow a mint tone after he pushed his chakra into them, his body feeling weaker during the process. His technique may have been the ideal one to use, but Shikamaru knew that what mattered most was that it worked. As soon as he saw your wound close up, however, he knew that every side effect would be worth it.

A sigh of relief escaped both of you as soon as the wound was closed, no more crimson blood escaping it.

“Next time, you really should wear your vest.” Shikamaru joked, barely able to catch his breath. His skilled fingers were already working on putting the other antidote together to use it.

You let out a pained laugh, coughing afterward. While every limb in your body was still burning, the combination of the knife being removed and Shikamaru’s medical ninjutsu did wonders and had you feeling like you could breathe again.

Seeing this side of Shikamaru was… new and quite frankly, also exciting. If it weren’t for the fact that you had almost stood at heaven’s door just now, you would most likely be swooning.

“Now breathe, I’m going to inject the antidote,” Shikamaru said, carefully positioning the needle above your skin. His other hand rested near the wound to keep you still. “It’s all going to be over soon.”

You squeezed your eyes shut and nodded, doing your best to not only keep still but also to ignore the uncomfortable sensation stemming from the injection. Both proved themselves to be difficult to do, your breathing still labored as the antidote made contact with your bloodstream.

The relief you felt was instant. Finally, you could breathe normally again, your body no longer feeling as thought it had been set aflame. Your chest rose up and down as you breathed in even breaths, given the opportunity to calm down from your high emotions. Curios, with your fingertip you dared to explore the wounded skin of your throat, but as soon as you touched it, you let out a pained hiss.

Shikamaru’s hand immediately came to envelop your own, keeping it away from the wound. “Let me see,” He said in an unusually calm and kind tone. “I’ll put some ointment on it, so it will heal.”

With remaining tears in your eyes, you agreed wordlessly.

Shikamaru worked the ointment onto your skin in silence, not a single word coming from him, and neither from you. With each breath you took in, his gaze would flicker upward to meet your eyes, checking if you were still alright. Only after a nod of confirmation, he would continue, his fingers shaking noticeably as he rubbed the ointment onto the wound.

“Thank you, Shikamaru.” You were able to croak out, your throat still feeling raw from all the screaming you did.

Shikamaru shot you a smile, one that instantly had your heart beating faster against your chest, heat rising to your cheeks. “Thank you for trusting me, (Name),” He allowed his body to fall onto the forest floor right beside you, sprawling out all of his limbs as his body calmed down from the emotional high he experienced. “And for not dying on me.”

A small smile tugged at your lips. “I would never. I’d feel too bad,” Your gaze flitted over to Shikamaru, taking in his exhausted form. “Plus, who else would have annoyed you then?”

The raven-haired brushed over your last comment. “I should have protected you better. As your teammate-”

You raised your hand to interrupt him, but not without letting out a cough. “It wasn’t your fault, I jumped in front of that knife. I’m sorry, Shikamaru.”

He let out a relieved chuckle, wiping his sweaty forehead with the back of his hand. “At least neither of us dying anymore,” He turned his head to look over at you, smiling. “What a mission.”

“Yeah, what a mission,” You echoed back, lost in the mesmerizing sight that was his eyes. For all these years, you had thought of Shikamaru wrong, and now you were mourning the wasted time. “Friends?”

Shikamaru blinked, for a moment not comprehending what you meant. But then, he nodded. “Friends.”

It was only small progress, but the third time after Shikamaru left such an impact on you, you knew, it would change your life for sure.

#naruto imagine #gender neutral reader #nara shikamaru #shikamaru nara x you #shikamaru nara x reader #shikamaru nara #shikamaru #nara shikamaru x reader #nara shikamaru x you #nara #angst #and a little bit fluff

[elizmanderson]

Wondering about how to find beta readers? Especially finding those who would understand what your writing. The previous question you answered was SO INCREDIBLY HELPFUL LIKE OIGHSODPIHGDL K - Especially about how to respond and work with beta reader feedback.

because my family had been my previous 'beta readers' which... the 'best' time was when I got into a huge slump and hated my comfort writing because my parents said my MC was too 'overdramtic' when I was just... describing and trying to process feelings that I've felt before with characters? It did not feel nice whatsoever and sent me spiraling. Another time I got kicked out of the house for the day for not wanting my NON-HUMAN characters to be gendered... but I digress.

Which brings me to my next question, how would I find people (preferably online) who can give me feedback and beta read? It's been difficult to find people IRL who are as excited/understand what I'm trying to write with my plant fairy escapism comfort.

Thanks for answering my questions! It means a lot to me. :)

this is, alas, a tricky question, because...guess where I used to meet beta readers? if you answered "Twitter," you are correct! and that's obviously considerably less viable than it once was (and less viable every day).

with that in mind: if anyone else reads this and has suggestions for similar events/hashtags/ways of connecting on other platforms (including Tumblr), please rb or comment!

at any rate, in general social media can be helpful for finding betas because there are often hashtags to use when you're looking for readers. sometimes there are even specific events to help writers connect with each other for critique purposes! again I'm unfortunately most familiar with this on Twitter, but for example there's been an event there called like CPmatch or something like that where folks would pitch their books and then interested people would comment like "wow yes I'd love to read this!"

personally most of my virtual beta readers are friends I met online just by talking about my books and learning about their books! while several of us are agented and/or published now, we all started in the same place: writers finishing up projects and hoping for good luck in the query trenches. so we'd all just shout excitedly about our books on Twitter, and that's how we found each other.

(hashtag events for writers - weekly, semi-weekly, or monthly events at a set time where the host asks questions/provides prompts and writers answer them and comment on others' answers. I'm sure they exist somewhere other than Twitter, but that's the only place I've seen them. not to be a broken record lol but I fear my knowledge about connecting with people online is more useless day by day because of the incompetent grapefruit now destroying my favorite platform.)

anyway, sometimes you'll be more excited about someone's book than they are about yours or vice-versa, but overall being genuinely interested in other writers' work and making friends with them over your shared interest is the best way to find future virtual betas, particularly betas who will understand what your books are trying to do (as opposed to what you described coming from your family).

and I know you said "preferably online," but just in case you ever have interest in in-person meet-ups: depending on your location, you may have a home region on NaNoWriMo (dot) Org, the official site for National Novel Writing Month. (I think I mentioned that in my last post, but if you're like "what the hell is that," lmk and I'll explain.) various regions may have in-person events in November, which is a great way to meet people irl!

(actually, speaking of NaNoWriMo, it's a great time to meet other writers virtually, too! use the tags "NaNo," "NaNoWriMo," or "National Novel Writing Month" to declare your participation and find other writers who are also doing it. the official site also allows group chats - I think there's a maximum of 20 people per chat - and don't quote me but I think you can request to be sorted randomly into one in case you don't already know anyone there.)

additionally, try googling writing groups in your area. there may not be any (and I have zero tips on how to start one, as I am much happier joining an existing group), but it's worth taking a look. in my area, we have an unofficial NaNoWriMo group that chats throughout the year on Discord (so online even though we're also close enough to see each other in person!), plus a weekly critique group that meets up at a Panera to share feedback, plus a weekly writing group that meets up at a local coffee shop to chat and get some writing done! even if your area doesn't have a critique-specific group, you can meet other writers in your area if that's something you're comfortable with and able to do.

(of course you should always meet people in a public place until and unless you get to know them well enough to feel comfortable meeting them somewhere private.)

I feel like this was basically no help at all because all my virtual meeting-other-writers experience came from Twitter, but:

tl;dr

use hashtags to indicate that you're looking for beta readers (don't ask me which hashtags; I've never personally done it this way)

join hashtag and beta-matching events on social media to meet people

connect with other writers on social media by shouting excitedly about your projects and theirs

if you participate in NaNoWriMo, meet people using relevant hashtags or on the NaNoWriMo website

to meet other writers in person, google writing groups in your area or check your NaNoWriMo home region to see if a group is active near you

#answered #beta reader #critique partners #writing tips #writing group #more info needed because I hail from twitter

[loveotomization]

i got unbaaaanned here's an ask: can i get a behind the scenes for (one of) your fav/s akekita scene/s you've written, any fic 👀 like, how did the idea come to you, or some fun fact abt the writing process... if you have anything to share ^^

Thank you for this!! I've been dying to have an excuse to talk about this stuff, you have no idea!

This wasn't exactly what you asked, but I thought I'd mention that people who have read my stuff in general point out my use of off-the-wall metaphors/similes. If anyone enjoys my little flair in doing this, I highly recommend reading the works of Peter Beagle! I shamelessly stole the technique from him and made it my own. I recommend starting off with The Last Unicorn (it's a classic for a reason), but any of his older works share a similar style (A Fine and Private Place, Folk of the Air). I'm not sure that I would be a writer today without him.

Anyway...

-Fun fact: Akechi is easier for me to write than Yusuke. I, too, am very angry inside and probably just need a hug lol It's cathartic. Although, two years of studying art in college actually helps with writing Yusuke, because I don't need to look up art terms.

-In Aesopica, the ending was highly inspired by my favorite Tokyo Ghoul fic, in which Kaneki turns the tables on Tsukiyama in the end (huge content warnings for that TG fic btw). I loved how satisfying the circular nature of it was and wanted to try something similar. I knew the ending I wanted to create right from the first chapter.

I cannot remember how I came up with the fruit bowl to both mark the passing of time, and the decay of their relationship. But go past me for coming up with that! My 2017 brain was the real mvp.

This is also my longest fic and you will not see me write anything this long again lol I just don't have it in me. Shout out to long fic writers, I'll have some of whatever you're snacking on.

I also remember this being something of a vent fic. I was sad and wanted to my faves to be sad together. While I do enjoy supportive akekit, where they both grow together, I also love when they just make each other worse.

-Sliced Halves, Light Syrup, please imagine me in the grocery store staring blankly at a can of peaches while concocting an entire fic. Writers are very normal people.

This is also my second most popular akekit fic. Fluff sells, I guess. I prefer my darker stuff tbh!

-After Aesopica, my personal favorite of mine is Psychosomatic. I'm shy about my love of organ-fondling since it's not a common thing to be into (there's not even an official ao3 tag for it lol), so I'm grateful to the person on the kink meme for prompting this. Knowing someone else was interested allowed me to put myself out there and write it. I re-read it not long ago just for fun, and it holds up. It's the intimacy of literally touching the insides of someone, you know?

-I'm scrolling through my akekit fics now and wow! I do not remember some of these? Who wrote these while I wasn't looking??

-Kilroy Was Here was going to be serious angst about Akechi forcibly kissing Yusuke so that he would no longer trust him, because he feels like he doesn't deserve trust, blah, blah... But the idea of Yusuke annoying the crap out of him before they got to that point was so funny to me that I had to run with it. If anyone was wondering about my sense of humor, this fic is it. (I am not funny)

-Born to be Posthumous 69 kudos harr harr... I enjoy this one even if it wasn't as popular as some of my others. I remember being depressed and angry and wanting to take it out on Akechi.

This is getting long now, but it was fun! Thank you again! Hopefully this wasn't too far from you asked! Most of my scenes just come to me as I'm writing with a basic idea in mind, so I just toss them in as I go. A humble chef tossing anything she finds in the fridge right into the soup.

Now that I'm back from my writing hiatus I definitely plan to bring out more akekit when I can!

#akekita #goro akechi #yusuke kitagawa

[embossross]

ahhh hi hi i'm here with thoughts about the new chap hehe

ok first, i LOVE this line so much. i can kind of see it now - the similarities between reader and hanma, but at the same time they are so so different. i'm not sure why but this stood out to me! there were also many lines like this thru out the chap - i do pay attention to details bc i know some writers have a bunch of foreshadowing in their fics👀

another thing is that i literally GASPED when a certain violet haired man made an approach in this fic, im guessing it was ran but i was so happy to have him in this fic!! (i don't think it was actually mentioned if it was ran or rin, but i'm p sure it was ran ahah) i rly liked the entire encounter and he was being pretty respectful which i didn't see coming lol.

yknow i loved this entire convo so much there was a lot thrown at us but at the same time you described/phrased it in such a way that made it easier to understand. i think i re read this part like 3 times; i kinda felt like this is the most honest convo they’ve had and it was the most series imo. it was really nice seeing hanma kinda open up. we also got to know more about the docs past too.

the last line about minimizing pain for the reader 👀 idk if im being dumb or if this has some sort of deeper meaning, but is it talking about the docs emotional pain? (towards hanma maybe?) im not sure lol rip and maybe it’ll be cleared up within the next few chapters but for now i’ll be left wondering hehe

okoki this is getting so so long i’m so sorry BUT i reallyyyy wanna talk about the smut i was literally vibrating in my seat the entire time aksdj when i first read the chap tags i kinda saw where it was going. club - hanma get head - reader watches. BUT OMG I DIDNT expect the reader to join in??!AND THE EYE CONTACT? deceased. i had to put my phone down a few times bc it was just THAT good ahaha. you really write such good smut it leaves my brain all mushy (that kakucho fie lives in my head rent free btw.)

OK IM FINISHED. i’m really sorry if this was annoying but i genuinely love this fic so much and your writing as well!!!! your fics are perfect for analysis and every chap keeps me thinking ahah but thanks again for sharing your wonderful work with us!!! have an amazing week!! (i’ve also read the devotion of the girl in the mirror again but was too nervous to send an ask rip)

this is the kind of comment/ask that really means the world to me 💖 it feels like so much more than i could ever ask for. so thank you so sincerely! i was stuck on the next chapter for both stories, and after reading this, i sat down and edited 2k words and broke the writers' block. THANK YOU 🥰

the fact that you screenshotted lines that really resonated!!!!! nothing could be less annoying!!! i'm giving you a long response right back because this is so much good stuff to react to!!!

one of my favorite lines from the chapter too! And yeah, reader + hanma are so different from each other, but i think they have a pretty similar problem with how they move through the world. they never could have had this conversation before. they're only able to be this open now because a) they both think they're talking more big picture and not being fully aware of what they're revealing about themselves; but most importantly b) they have a CREEPING INTIMACY! they are so much closer than they were a few chapters back :) I am so glad you noticed that because it was Very intentional.

you pretty much nailed the pain comment. Reader recognizes that she is taking on a very out of character risk with the Hanma stuff, and that opens her up to emotional pain but also risk that he's going to make her (or her life) change, which she is resistant to.

not much to say about the smut stuff other than...i am glad to see it's working. that is what i was going for 😏😆 (also thank you on the kakucho fic :))

it means the WORLD that you find things to analyze and think about because i am pouring so much of that in there intentionally, and knowing that people see it and get something out of it too is Super motivating. You are more than welcome to send me nice asks on any story any time (in fact, i'm begging lol jk)

#literally insanely kind and nice and so grateful wow #like woww #read more because i said a lot #i love you for this so much #asks

[wiseatom]

hi! i was wondering if u were willing to share what ur relationship to writing as a writer has been recently or when you first started out? maybe also like how you envision a piece before you start writing it?

my problem is that i only seem to want to write when i'm REALLY entrenched in a fandom and that hasn't happened since i gave up on harry potter a few years ago. so i'm pretty out of practice, and i wasn't that good to begin with, and i don't even really consider myself a writer, but i just have so many ideas for the characters that i love that i feel like i need to write them down!!! any advice?

anyway i just love your content so i thought i'd ask. no pressure to respond tho haha :)

hello!!! i am absolutely willing to share because i’ve had a very similar experience to you!!

i’ve had a really weird relationship with writing fic. i wrote and published around 400k words of fic from the time i was thirteen to when i was sixteen, and then literally just. stopped. for several years, lol. i got really into art around then, and spent more time and energy on developing that skill set vs writing, and i just found it very hard to balance the two (and i still do!!). i wrote a little and posted a little when i was around twenty one/twenty two, then stopped actively writing again until last year. i completely get where you’re coming from as far as feeling out of practice, and i also really only want to write when i’m deep into a fandom — i can’t tell you how many unfinished fics i have sitting in my google drive because of how many times my interests have shifted over the years lol. it’s a crime ❤️

my best advice is to stop getting so caught up on whether or not you’re a “writer” (whatever that means to you! it’s different for everyone!) and whether or not what you’re writing is “good”. writing is a skill, and like with any skill, you can’t get “good” without being “bad” first. i put these in quotations because i use these terms very loosely — creative skills in general are annoying and hard, because your brain learns what “good” is faster than you are able to actually produce. that’s why blocks happen! because you feel like nothing you’re coming out with lives up to the learned standard you have in your head. sometimes your standard/your ability match, and then your standard pulls ahead and your ability has to catch up. something i’ve found that’s helped my writing so much is making sure i’m reading more, because being well-read increases that standard, and your ability WILL get there. you just have to fumble and flail a little for that to happen.

which leads to my writing process! it depends on what i’m writing — i mostly write one-shots, but i have a multi-chapter in the works that is Scaring Me because i haven’t written anything multi-chapter since i was sixteen lol. i don’t have any master doc with writing ideas, so each new idea gets it’s own separate document. once i make a new doc, everything i’ve thought of for that idea goes in there: dialogue, a certain sentence, concepts i can’t turn into a sentence at the moment but want to later, etc. with dialogue, i find it easiest to script it without dialogue tags. isolating the lines of dialogue like that helps me hear it in the characters’ voices, which helps me identify when things are out of character or worded weirdly. when it comes to actually writing the scene the dialogue is in, i just follow the script and re-write with dialogue tags, narrative introspection, etc. i usually have the beginning of a fic in my mind, script all the dialogue associated with the idea, and then go back and write (mostly) chronologically around everything. it’s very disjointed, but it’s what works for me! with multi-chaptered fics, i make a pretty rough outline so that i can make sure certain ideas don’t get lost and that themes are cohesive.

editing is a whole other process, because like i mentioned earlier, it’s not productive to get caught up on whether something is “good”/“bad”, so when i’m writing, i try to treat it as a very rough draft (emphasis on try, bc this is easier said than done, lol). once the draft is done, i go back through and absolutely tear it apart, like to the point of bullying myself lol. since i use drive to write fic, my first run through is just making comments on things i think need to be reworded, awkward parts, etc. then i go through the entire thing again on suggestion mode and make those changes, and do a third reread to see how everything is sitting. yes, this process does make you sick of your own fic before you even post it ❤️ after the third run through, if everything is good to go, i’ll plug it into ao3, fix the formatting, and then read again in post preview because i’m a little insane! i accidentally hit post instead of post preview for it’s a choice, so i am still finding formatting issues weeks later lol. but anyway! i find that doing it this way helps my ability match my standards a little better!

i am SO sorry that this is so long omg. i hope that this answered your questions and helps at all!! thank you for enjoying my content and letting me ramble for four paragraphs!!!

#asks #writing* #when you’re insane and can’t give a concise answer to anything ever 😇

[tiny-tany-thaanos]

Tag game

I saw @cloudberry-sims and @poisonfireleafs doing this tag and decided why not? I need something to procrastinate 

Five songs you’ve been listening to on repeat recently?

Caravan Palace - Human Leather Shoes For Crocodile Dandies 

Alligatoah - Füttern Verboten 

Sunrise Avenue - I Help You Hate Me 

Within Temptation - Mad World 

Cryo Chamber mixes in general - they help me concentrate while studying

Last movie you watched?

Let’s say Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (the plot is kinda meh but I liked the visuals). I’m pretty sure I watched something after but I can’t remember what exactly, yo.

Currently watching?

Oh I have a long to-watch-list and the most difficult part is to choose where to start, lol. 

Currently Reading?

H.P. Lovecraft’s stories - I have a big collection, probably full one, of his works and I read them when I feel like it. Also Austin’s Pride and Prejudice and Hermann Hesse’s short stories for my studies

Consider youself tagged!

#non-sims #tag game #about tiny-tany-thaanos #lol I'm sure last time I mentioned what I was reading in a similar tag it was also Lovecraft

[sylenth-l]

share the candal fics🔫🔫🔫 NOW

NOOO I'LL PROTECT THEM WITH MY LIIIIFE

Jk jk I'm happy to share 😂

I think it's pretty straightforward on AO3, you just go in the tag and read everything you're interested in. There are 4 pages total, so I don't think it requires some heavy filtering or recs to not get lost in.

BUT since we're talking about fanfiction and I LOVE it 👀✨ I'm gonna use this as an excuse to list some fics anyway, in no particular order.

UPD: added one more work (Like the Pull of the Tide to the Moon) I was so sure I already linked this one, but apparently I didn't, because I'm a dumb idiot?? Sigh

💠 Candy from Strangers - oh, it was the first candal I read, so this one has a special place in my heart. This writer is just generally so good at portraying them, I wholeheartedly recommend to read every single candal on their page, they all are perfect. There're SO MANY things I like about them, but I think the highlight is how good Exos are written and how recognizable Destiny's world in general is. Also the best nsfw content out there

(And for this fic in particular - this thing about the candy gesture is 1000% canon, and if it's not then Bungie just didn't figure it out yet, duh)

💠 Candal Collection - same author and I know I already said they're perfect, but there's no way I'm not including this Holy Bible of candal in that list. Reread every Sunday, 12/10 🔥

💠 Solar flare and Remembrance - ah yes, these two. They're quite different in the mood, but have something similar in them - both are one of those fics where at first you cry from how good, and hot, and soft, and filled with love it is and then you get to the 2nd chapter and. Just cry. 10 times harder.

💠 Lucky Pants - aww, it's the most adorable and funny thing, love it. I can imagine that scene so well. Has a continuation, don't miss it! I felt almost as disappointed as Cayde in it tho lol (I mean it in a good way ofc)

💠 Freckles and Constellations - that's some heartwarming and soulhealing fluff right there, so nice and romantic. Oh and did I mention I absolutely love it when Andal speaks Spanish?

💠 Where Do You See Yourself In The Future - now it's time for some quality angst. The utmost respect for writers who can set the mood so well you feel like sitting in a dark corner and crying even though nothing really bad happened... Yet. And you know what? IT'S THE SAME AUTHOR. They're so good at describing emotions. So you know what to do, read everything they have! (As a bonus there's also a very nice gen about Cayde, Andal and Tevis)

💠 Fool's Gold - ah, I'm a sucker for such dramatic scenes, they just. Make me feel things 🥺 Especially when done so nicely.

💠 Andal/Cayde Word Prompts - another blessed golden mine of candal content, different in mood, genre and length, but all equally amazing 🥺💙 (With occasional mentions of Shiro and Tevis as well!)

💠 live through this - I'm a sucker for such dramatic scenes [2] 🥺 I really like the idea about the gun though, it's actually quite clever and angsty in the just right amount

💠 Little Laramie - oh this, this is such a nice view on how they tried to fix whatever it was between them after the Dare, I love it. Cayde, you're such a dumb idiot (affectionate) Also it features their Ghosts as a couple! My sweet girls!! 😭💙 Once again I recommend to check out other works of this author, not all of them are shippy, but interesting nonetheless

💠 Best Laid Plans - this actually feels like a prequel to the previous fic, they seem to match well to me imo, despite being written by different people. Cayde is a dumb idiot in the exact same amount for sure, sigh This one is like the calm before the storm, the last nice days before everything changes. I just wish this fic was a liiiittle bit longer considering where it ends iykwim… 👀✨

💠 Till We Fall Apart and 最亲爱的人 are both in Chinese. Can I read Chinese? No. Does that stop me? Hell no! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ If you're not scared of Google Translate (or can read Chinese, which is obviously better and I envy you to no end) then go for it and see some other their works (read tags and warnings carefully though, just in case).

💠 Like the Pull of the Tide to the Moon - oh, this is a wonderful ust, very beautiful with both of them being idiots just in the right amount. AND with a good ending after all.

💠 Honorable mention: the rushing sea - it's actually O14 fic that I love, but it has my favorite candal cameo of all time. Thanks to it I discovered I have a kink for my otps beating each other's asses in the best Crucible activity aka Crimson Doubles 😂

And also some works I didn't see on AO3 (maybe I'm just bad at searching…), but still love them:

💠 gamble - I really like how Cayde's thoughts are portrayed here, it's exactly what he'd feel in such situation imo. Bonus points for Felwinter's mountain ✨ They have a couple of other candals as well, so! CLICK THE TAG!!

💠 You’re supposed to talk me out of this - it's filled with so many details and Cayde's feelings are so visible and bittersweet from just this it makes me go aaaahh 😭 Also CLICK THE TAG [2], there are so many quality posts about them here!.. (it's the same author as «Little Laramie» btw)

💠 #6 slow kisses - extra soft and wholesome kissing AND dis was for meee 🥺😭💙

💠 Kinktober Candal - unfairly hot 🔥hair pulling🔥, god bless this author for keeping me fed on this kink in particular. And you know what to do with the tag!

I tried to include no more than 2 fics from the same author to keep this list at a reasonable length, but I once again HIGHLY encourage you to check their profiles, since many of them have more amazing works available and of course to look through the whole tag on AO3, since I obviously didn't link everything!

#ask #anonymous #destiny #cayde-6 #andal brask #candal #fic recs #sorry i'm bad at putting my feelings/impressions into words #i just. love them 🥺 #forever crying about how i missed the candal boom a few years ago #what an idiot huh

[modernpaw]

Midnight Ride

Adam Sackler x Female Reader

Summary: You've been chatting with a guy you matched with on a dating app for two weeks now, and tonight is your first time meeting him in person.

Notes: This is not at all related to The One, the other piece I wrote about Sackler days earlier. For the purposes of this universe, let's pretend that sitting on the metal handlebar of a bicycle and going around New York late at night aren't dangerous. LOL. And just for added feels, this is the song that was responsible for this fic.

CW: A little bit of swearing, AFAB reader, awful cycling practices, but generally fluff

Words: 1.3k

It's been two years since you last went out on a date, but anyone looking at you now wouldn't be able to tell, not with the way you seem so comfortable talking to the man sitting across you.

Several weeks ago, you decided to finally reenter the dating scene, swiping left and right through New York's most eligible bachelors. To your unexpected delight, the pickings weren't as slim as you thought, and you ended up matching with several interesting men.

Adam happened to be one of them. His profile listed him as an actor, a detail that usually makes you a bit wary, considering that most actor types you know seem to be only interested in themselves, but there was something about him that made you reconsider.

His eyes had both an intensity and a vulnerability that made it hard for you to look away. And with that kind of connection just from the screen alone, you couldn't not give it a shot.

And you're so glad you did.

Adam is thoughtful and sweet, remembering details about you despite mentioning them only once and reminding you to take your vitamins. But he's also funny as hell and swears like the world is going to fucking end tomorrow.

After two weeks of constant messaging, you two agreed to meet up for dinner at a late-night diner along Madison.

The moment you strode in, the two of you locked eyes immediately. There was no mistaking Adam. His hair was just as long as it was in the photo, and when he stood up to greet you, you saw exactly what the 6"3 in his profile came with, and boy did you approve.

Fortunately, he didn't seem to notice your ogling, overshadowed as it was by the confusion of whether you two should go in for a hug, a kiss on the cheek, or a handshake. It should have been awkward, but then you laughed and gave him a bright smile, and just like that, the tension was broken.

You spent the first hour candidly talking about your respective expectations about how the other would look in real life, which somehow, led to you two exchanging photos of your younger selves over burgers and fries.

"You looked so cute with braces on!"

"Oh my god, Adam, your ears are so adorable!"

"Holy shhiiiiitttt, had you gone to prom with me in that, I never would have left you a virgin!"

"Adam!" you hissed, clamping his mouth with one hand while looking around frantically. You might have told him about your high school boyfriend backing out of having sex with you on the night of your high school prom, but that didn't mean you wanted the rest of the diner to know it, too.

"What," he replied innocently once you removed your hand. "I totally wouldn't!"

"Shut up!" you said, trying not to laugh as his declarations became more and more ridiculous. The rest of dinner went on in a similar vein, with Adam making you laugh and you trying not to choke on your food, and by the time you decide to get the bill, it's nearly midnight.

"I can't believe we've been talking for almost four hours!" you exclaim, looking at your watch.

"I can," he says boldly, eyes twinkling at you, like he's still in awe that you're real. And he is. From the moment you two connected on the app, Adam has found himself drawn to you. You're smart and funny, but not in a way that seems like you think yourself better than everyone else or self-destructive. You appear genuinely interested in him as a person, and so far, you don't seem to be put off by his "intense" disposition.

Whenever he talks to you, he feels like he wants to be on his best behavior, but also that he doesn't have to pretend to be anyone else, which he's well-aware is a complete oxymoron. Still, it's the only way he can put it.

He told Ray as much earlier this evening, and Ray just told him that maybe, just maybe, him being on this so-called best behavior is not too far from who he really is.

But Adam has no fucking clue who he is. After Hannah, after Jessa, after all the women he's been with, he feels like he's just beginning to get to know himself again. One thing he knows for sure, however, is that he likes himself when he talks to you.

And he doesn't want the night to end.

Neither do you.

You two are walking aimlessly down the street when Adam stops in his tracks and turns to you.

"Wanna go for a ride?" he asks.

"What?" you squawk.

Adam laughs at your reaction. "Not that kind of ride, kid," he says, and you realize that he's referring to the row of Citi bikes for rent on the curb.

You're not exactly embarrassed by your reaction, but his next words definitely fluster you.

"But maybe on our next date," he teases, wagging his eyebrows suggestively.

"Don't make promises you can't keep," you manage to toss back in reply before leaving him to inspect the bicycles at a closer range.

Adam shakes his head. "Okay, that's it," he says before wrapping his hands around your waist and picking you up from behind.

"Adam!" you yell out, giggling.

He swings you a few times before eventually helping you get on the metal handlebar of the bike. Your hands automatically hold on to the bar to keep yourself upright. "Keep that adorable tush right there," he murmurs as he gets on the bike seat behind you.

Then he starts pedalling.

It's not exactly easy to hold a conversation on a bicycle, but somehow, you two manage by taking turns asking each other short would-you-rather questions with absolutely no context.

"Elephants or koalas?" he asks.

"Elephants. They never forget," you answer. "Lions or tigers?"

"Lions," he says grimly. "Tigers will most certainly eat you on sight. Hero or villain?"

"I-Innocent bystander," you manage to say despite the laughter that's already bubbling so close to the surface. It turns into a full-on guffaw when he sputters comically behind your ear. "That's not even one of the choices, kid!"

"Well, the rules have changed!" you yell back when a cab honks loudly in the distance. "Gold or silver?"

"Glass," he replies, not willing to concede even though he has zero idea how to not lose. "Upstairs or downstairs?"

"Uh," you stutter, not expecting such a difficult one right away. "Sideways."

"Really?" he asks, his voice taking on a velvety quality. You don't know how to explain it, but you feel like Adam has just changed the rules right under your nose.

"You bet," you answer, soldiering on. "On or off?"

Adam laughs, and you try not to shiver at the hot puffs of breath that warm the back of your ear. "Oh, definitely off," he says.

"You're supposed to give me an answer that's not one of the choices," you say, trying to distract your thoughts from going down that road.

"I'm sorry," he says in a way that says he's definitely not sorry at all. "Fast or slow?"

Well, two can play that game. "Fast," you say, but before he can react, you add, "Like a fucking jackhammer."

"Ffffuck," he swears and he pedals a bit faster.

"Adam!" you cry out suddenly, afraid to lose your balance.

"Shit! Sorry!" he apologizes, gently slowing down to a stop. The Brooklyn Bridge is a good place to end the ride as any, and if you didn't know any better, you'd think that he planned this perfectly. You hop down from your seat and turn to face Adam who makes to dismount as well.

"Want to walk the rest of the way?" Adam asks you with a goofy smile.

You smile back. "Yeah, I'd like that."

As you stroll over the bridge side by side, Adam slowly inches his hand on the handlebar closer to yours and you reach out to do the same. You can't stop yourself from smiling, and you just know, even without looking, that he's got a smile on his face, too.

Tagging: @cornmousequeen, @fizzywoohoo, @paper-n-ashes, @morby

If you would like to be tagged in future adcu stories or only those for specific adcu characters (which I cannot promise will actually happen), let me know! :) Otherwise, thank you for reading!

#Spotify #adam sackler x female reader #adam sackler x reader #afab reader #adcu fanfiction #adcu #mild swearing #do not ride bikes like this!

[giuliafc]

Chinese horoscopes and Miraculous

Hi there!

I actually wrote this article for a Facebook group during the summer, but i had completely forgotten about it until I read the very in-depth analysis of Kagami's role in the series written by @geekgirles . There, she mentioned the bit in Ikari Gozen that had got me started on this research, so I thought why not? let's 'delight' you with this indepth analysis of the four characters of Marinette, Adrien, Luka and Kagami based on what we know of their zodiac signs in the Chinese horoscope. There are a couple of things that may surprise you.

First of all, let's put a lovely wee "keep reading" tag, so it doesn't clog your board, because it's a little long (ah, the understatement!)

Now. Here we are and if you clicked on carry on reading it means that you may be interested so... welcome welcome.

Apologies for the length

Let's first of all talk about how the Chinese horoscope can give us a clue as of the characters age and date of birth.

In Ikari Gozen we find out that Marinette is a Snake in the Chinese horoscope. This narrows the search for her date of birth to two very precise years. 2013 or 2001. Now... counting that if she was born in 2013 she would be 7 now, it's most likely that she's born in 2001. In the French edition she is revealed instead to be a Leo. Which places her birthday in late July/beginning of August 2001. Kagami instead is revealed to be a Dragon, and a Scorpio, which places her birthday around November 2000. In an official Marinette’s Instagram post her birthday has been revealed as the 20th of November, IIRC.

Now... not only this is a great deal of trivia information for us fans, which also helps us place the timeline of the story, which hasn't yet reached a full year in Canon from the start (in the Felix episode it's revealed that it's the first anniversary of Emilie’s disappearance. Hence in 3 series the story has advanced only by less than one year). It also helps up place the birthdays of some other characters.

Adrien for example. His birthday was series 1 episode 1, quite far from Marinette's birthday in Befana. So it's likely that he's a dragon like Kagami (which would also make sense thinking that Kagami is a character that mirrors Adrien's life and situation. But this isn't the place to discuss such thing, i refer to the very well developed article written by @geekgirles if you want to know more). A lot of people have theorised that he may be a Libra and be born maybe at the beginning of October, but of this I have no proof.

However, coming back to the Dragon sign it gets even more interesting, guys. If one of you have got more in-depth information and this comes up to be wrong I do apologise. I performed quite of an extensive research on the subject but of course I'm no astrologist so I can be wrong. That said... Not only the Dragon is considered the sign of the Emperor in the Chinese horoscope, and a lucky sign (ha). But 2000 is also the year of the Golden Dragon (metal). What better description than a golden dragon for our handsome sunshine?

It gets even better when you get to the Dragon man's personality. Loves to be the centre of the attention. Natural flirts (ha! Touché Chat Noir!). Hot headed. Stubborn. Competitive. Naturally attracts money and women. Full of energy. Do I need any more proof that Adrien is a Dragon?

Let's see what the horoscope says about the Snake, and let's compare it to Marinette/Ladybug, so you understand why I'm pretty sure that the production looked this up quite in detail and that Chinese astrology can be at the base of our beloved characters.

So the Snake woman is intuitive, intelligent, reserved and mysterious, has deep thinking, a mind that goes a mile per minute. Because they are smart and come quickly to solutions, they are great in crisis situations. They're able to step back and consider workable solutions. They are determined, sensual and smart and have innate wisdom. Doesn't this speak Marinette AND Ladybug from a mile?

Now... Luka. Until last week we weren’t really that sure of how old Luka was, Astruc had said that he was a couple of years older than Marinette, but Zag’s website had highlighted that Luka was Juleka’s twin brother which, counting that Juleka was in Marinette’s class, didn’t make any sense. But last weekend Astruc has actually confirmed that Juleka has repeated a year and that yes, Luka is her twin brother.

Already before knowing this I had a look at the personality of the previous signs in the horoscope, and I had strong feelings that Luka may be a Rabbit, which would make him born in 1999 and one year older than Adrien. And this has been confirmed, so now we know. He is indeed a rabbit. Do you want proof? Rabbit men are calm, extraordinarily polite, and will do everything to avoid conflict. They have control over themselves and are sometimes conservatives. They can be considered a "yes-man", but have a line that they will never cross. They like organising, decorating, helping the wife/gf. They are great friends but don't like getting too close to someone. They are shy, introverted, honest, cuddle-lovers and attention givers. They are associated with the western sign of cancer, which is associated with the moon and the arts. Tell me if this doesn't speak Luka by a mile?

Now a little bit of trivia that will make you laugh is... in the Chinese horoscope the cat doesn't exist. The legend says that Buddha invited the animals to a dinner, and the mouse tricked the cat and didn't wake him up, making him miss out on being chosen for the horoscope. However in TAIWAN things are different and the Cat takes the place of the RABBIT in the horoscope. The confusion seems to come from the old Chinese word for Rabbit, Mao, which sounds like the Taiwanese word for Cat Mau. So the sign of the Rabbit is also the sign of the Cat. Oh the irony!!

Snakes are yin energy. Rabbits are also yin energy. Dragons are yang energy.

But it gets better! Let's look at love compatibility, shall we? *rubs hands* hehe...

Dragon man x Dragon woman (Adrien and Kagami) can be steamy and can work only if both have their own realm to shine on, because both are too competitive and can get into competition with each other. They love to be the centre of their world. They're great leaders but want the spotlight and don't settle for less. They're both independent and stubborn and their personality will clash, making it difficult to maintain the relationship going. They require a lot of love and admiration. They will never give in and apparently two dragons have a good physical relationship, mostly.

They CAN work together, but only if each has their own way to shine.

Sorry, Adrigami shippers.

Dragon man x snake woman (Adrien and Marinette): they can be an excellent couple. They find each other physically attractive. The dragon is bold and full of energy, the snake is appealing in a more subtle way. Excellent romantic relationship, they both have strong personalities that attract each other. They share a degree of savoir-faire that prevents serious concerns. The male dragon will be tempted to stray, but he will know better than doing that, because he knows very well that his companion has hidden poisonous fangs (lol) and is VERY jealous... so he will look but not touch (the wise one will at least). Snake women love success and attention, but they're not as flashy as dragon men so they will be more subtle. Snake women are self-possessive, devoted and can give a good boost of confidence to a dragon man. She will be better at handling finances than him (that wouldn't surprise me in adrienette!). They both like fine things but Snake will teach Dragon to not overspend. Little trivia: the dragon was the sign of the emperor and the snake was the advisor. So they work very well in tandem. Their union will be full of passion and personal satisfaction.

Adrienette is in the stars, guys.

Now last but not least... Snake woman x Rabbit/cat man (Luka and Marinette, but in a way even Chat Noir and Ladybug): very good couple too, they enjoy great conversation and have great time together. They make great friends. Snake loves the attention Rabbit gives and Rabbit is drawn by her sensuousness. They start as friends and have enticing conversations, which draws them together. When they start dating they realise they have similar tastes. They love cuddling in a hidden corner and will feel safe in their cosy nest to explore each other's sensuality. They can make a strong couple, unless their personalities start clashing. Rabbit can get annoyed at Snake's love for novelty and her extravagance, which may cause friction. If their temper clashes, they can't overcome differences.

So... Lukanette can work too, sorry guys. But as highlighted, it also works very well as a friendship. And sadly it's the same for Ladynoir...

What I find funny in all of this is that, if this is true, Luka has the Snake miraculous, Marinette is a Snake sign, Luka is a cat sign, Adrien is a cat miraculous, Adrien and Kagami are a dragon sign, Kagami is a dragon miraculous... Jesus what a circle! Add to the mix Marinette as the RAT miraculous and we have a real laugh… (if any of you has ever watched Fruit Basket, the Japanese anime about the Chinese horoscope, you know perfectly well what I’m talking about!) and Snake/Rabbit as friends and potential couple works for both Lukanette AND Ladynoir, counting that rabbit = cat. And then you think about how Chat Noir bounces on his baton and you think "yes that's a rabbit, indeed"!

Any thoughts?

(apologies if this reflection doesn’t make sense to you!)

#miraculous #miraculous ladybug #miraculous les aventures de ladybug et chat noir #miraculous lb #miraculous marinette #miraculous adrien #miraculous chat noir #miraculous luka #Kagami

[beskar-cowboy]

I'm sorry but I just keep coming back to it...can you please BANG out an Ezra story?? 😏 Looks like you wanted to, so do it!!! Your writing is fantastic!

oh my gosh thank you so much for requesting!!! have you been reading my tags?! :)))) i AM cooking up a little ezra story so here is a totally improvised, bullshitted excerpt from something that i may or may not be including in it! i hope this doesn’t totally suck, it took a turn i was not expecting it to take lol.

(850 words) NSFW - mentions of sexual activities, mentions of food (i think that’s it? let me know if i’ve missed something!) 

***

The digs start early.

You learned quickly that Ezra likes to make the most of his days. Getting up bright and early and setting foot outside the tent much earlier than he would like to. He’s still dealing with the learning curve of losing his arm and whatnot.  

Some days you go with him, other days you stay in the tent to work on your diagrams and write ups on the unique flora and fauna of the Green.

Today was a day that you happen to accompany Ezra.

You follow behind him, notebook in hand as you survey for unique bugs as he does the same with the ground, looking for aurelac deposits, for signs of roots and hidden gems beneath the surface of the alien moon. Some days when you two don’t speak much, he’ll walk along ahead of you, not bothering to stop and see what you’re looking at if you happen to spot a new bug or plant. Other days he lingers and asks questions. Today he’s quiet.

Which you’re actually thankful for, for once.

You’re not quite sure what’s compelled you to come up with this little plan, but you’ve hatched it nonetheless. Over the past few weeks you’d been harvesting and growing up a little collection of edible vegetation that you’ve managed to catalogue in hopes of making a real dinner for once.

All the food the two of you have is rations: all dried, dehydrated, powdered, blended or pre-made. It’s all mush and you’re sick of it. You’re sure Ezra is too.

Today you’re in search of edible bugs to finally cross off your list, the last ingredients for the little food bowl you’ve cooked up in your mind and will actually cook up later tonight.

You sort of want to surprise Ezra with it. You’re still not sure why, but whatever. He works incredibly hard, much harder than you, especially with the one arm. All you do is look at bugs, animals, plants. He mines for precious, expensive gemstones.

Even if your relationship is strange, very professional, even cold at times, there was still a lingering of some sort behind all of that. You won’t dare name it. You can’t.

It’s in the lingering of his eyes out on digs, protective perhaps as he surveys the area for deposits and threats alike, making sure he doesn’t stray too far from you even when it looks like his back is completely turned on you and he couldn’t care less.

The lingering on the way your hand moves over your notebook or notepad with a pencil or pen in hand, the way your wrist curls along with your letters across the old worn paper as you scribble down notes about some fucking bug thats apparently so interesting and unique.

The lingering and fixation on your lips, the way they form around words and smile a bit when you get particularly excited about something: a plant, a little animal. Whatever it is, it makes your eyes sparkle and that makes Ezra feel a little funny inside.

He doesn’t linger on that thought too much though.

Not even when his eyes linger in the darkness of the tent tracking you like a predator would its prey, when the sun is long past the horizon and it’s hard to see anything other than your silhouette. Especially when he’s pressed up right against you, fucking you into the wall, your cot, his cot, over your work chair which you sit in too fucking often but he won’t tell you that.

No, he doesn’t linger on that thought too much. Not when you’re trembling beneath him like a flower in the wind and crying out his name, begging for more when he’s already pummeling you into oblivion.

Your body lingers on that, especially when you follow him out on digs the next day. Like today.

There’s a funny sway to your walk, one that has Ezra refraining from commenting on in hopes of avoiding sounding like a complete douchebag. You always feel him the next day, it's not something you particularly mind, sometimes it's comforting, especially when you two don’t talk or you’re left alone in the tent writing while he’s out on a dig. 

So as some sort of weird ‘thanks for keeping me sane on this alien moon by fucking me dumb every night’, you’ve decided you’re going to make him some good, normal food for once.

You smile to yourself as you pluck a bug matching your diagrams from a tree branch and plop it into your jar filled with similar bugs. Ezra stops ahead of you and turns to look at what you’ve found.

“Found something good there, little dove?” He draws out in that accent that makes your knees feel a little weak, maybe it's just the toxins from the dust getting into your system. You’d rather it be that. Better than feeling all warm and fuzzy when he calls you his little dove.

You smile something knowing as you place the jar back in your bag and replacing it with your notebook filled with drawings. Ezra being ever the smart and cunning man knows you’ve got something up your sleeve. He’s been trying to figure it out all morning.

“Maybe.” You smirk. Ezra shakes his head, you think he smiles too. 

#sdjhvskldfhjg i hope this isnt garbage #i really love ezra so much and im excited to actually start working on this story #ezra prospect #ezra x reader #reader insert #drabble #my writing #request #blackberries45 #ezra (prospect) #prospect #smut #ezra smut #ezra x you

[itsclydebitches]

How long does it take you to write a rwby meta? I'm thinking of doing a similar thing for miraculous ladybug but I'm not sure I'd have the time. Any tips?

Miraculous Ladybug! I started you and then... lost track of it, as usual lol. I should pick that up again. 

To answer your question though, each kind of meta takes a different length of time. If we’re talking recaps, each generally takes me around eight continuous hours to complete. I watch the episode, take notes as I go, frequently stop for screenshots, write the meta, browse the main tags for clarification about anything I’m confused about/general reaction to the episode, read through to edit/try to catch typos, format it into a tumblr post, add screenshots, add links and such as needed... post. If I have any tips, it would be to not do all that over the course of one Saturday afternoon and night lol. The only reason I subject myself to that stupidity is because 1. I like to ride the episode’s wave and post when people are engaging with it (or at least the First viewers are) and 2. If I let myself post whenever, there’s a good chance they’d never get done (as my poor Before the Dawn recaps attest). If you establish any sort of routine though you’re good. If, for example, you want to write a meta about each week’s episode but don’t think you’ll have time to do that in a single day, space it out. Tell readers you always post the day before a new episode airs, helping to remind everyone of what happened last week and giving yourself six days to write. Something like that. 

Other, very general tips: 

Like with any analysis, work to prove any claims you make. Point to where you saw this on screen, mention the dialogue where this occurs, provide screenshots as evidence, etc. 

Accept the fact that you’ll probably be wrong about things. Obviously a great deal of meta-ing is subjective, but there are plenty of times you just misread a scene. Example: when I was confused about how Weiss got her boar to Whitley in time, not immediately realizing that Willow had summoned it. It happens (but it also happens less when you’re not writing on a self-imposed deadline lol) 

Edit your work to the best of your ability and try to break up long paragraphs (oof I’m dragging myself today) and/or break things up with images 

If you’ve discussed a point elsewhere and your blog is organized enough to know where it is, link it so new readers easily know what you’re talking about without you having to rehash the whole thing 

Speaking of organization, have a page on your blog where people can easily access all the stuff you’ve written 

I usually work chronologically through episodes, but don’t be afraid to jump around, especially if you have a singular point to make about multiple, connected scenes 

Pick your battles, whether we’re talking about criticism or praise. Chances are you’ll have far more to say about an episode than you can work into a single meta (mine usually clock in at about 4-7k, which is already pretty long). Save the smaller stuff for side metas or, like me, start half your posts with, “I was also thinking about this thing I didn’t put in the recap...” 

Don’t be afraid to reblog your metas on different days/at different times to catch new readers. Tumblr has developed a strange “You can’t reblog your own stuff” mentality which I’m personally not here for. It’s your blog. Do what you like! 

And, as said, have fun with it! 😊

#rwby #Anonymous

[samshogwarts]

My review of 2020

Or: I say thank you.

First of all, sorry for the long post 😅. You guys know I don'tike long posts without a "read more under the line". But I nade the post with my mobile phone.... Aaaaaaaanyway. Also sorry for all the tags. I hope I don't annoyed someone with it <~<. So let's continue:

I think this year has been a particularly difficult year for everyone. As 2020 is drawing to a close, I mentally let the year pass again.

The bottom line is that I have to say that 2020 was turbulent for me, but not necessarily bad. Much good, but also bad, has happened. And I want to start with the bad things right away.

At the beginning of the year, my depression and eating disorder relapsed. I've always had trouble talking about it because I know my friends can't handle this issue. I felt pressured because they wanted to do things with me, but I couldn't. So I withdrew completely, hiding my emotions and wearing a mask.

At that time I created this blog. At first I didn't want to create my own content, just follow the content of @ladycibia, @hogwartsmystory and @kyril-hphm. Incidentally, that is also the reason why I call these 3 blogs the Big Three. So it's their fault that I'm here. Lol.

And then the first Hyops message came at the end of March. A very good friend of mine got Corvid-19 and lost the battle against the disease a few days later. I still remember how the news pulled the floor from under my feet. It feels like I completely lost faith in everything and I started to realize how dangerous this year could be. 

But life goes on and so I visited a friend and her family in early July. It was the anniversary of her husband's death, who was also a very good friend of mine. He died of cancer last year and I couldn't go to his funeral. So I wanted to stop by on the day he died. I actually thought I could do it. But when you read a friend's name on a tombstone for the first time.. Guys, that's a punch in the stomach like no other and I can't really describe how it feels. I had made up my mind not to cry in front of his wife or children because it was hard enough for them. Didn't work.

And of course this year meant to go one better.

Another friend of mine died of the virus in mid-August, leaving behind a wife and a child. Again, I was unable to attend the funeral. And to be honest, it still bothers me way more I want to admit. In two years I lost three wonderful people who meant a lot to me and I couldn't say goodbye to any of them. When I see the three of them again after my death, you can be sure I'll kick their butts for it.

But August was the worst month for me in many ways. In addition to the death of my buddy, my father's family also volunteered. And that means only one thing - trouble.  And properly. I haven't had contact with this family for over 12 years for good reason. Now one person from this family has passed away. And first of all, I don't really care if anyone of them would die. I don't even know the person who passed away. But I wasn't told either by my grandmother or my father. So my deadline to cancel the inheritance has expired. Of course it was debts. You have to know that the inheritance rights of my country are very complicated. The reason my father or grandmother didn't tell me about it was because they didn't want to bother with the paperwork. They always had the opportunity to contact me via Facebook or my half-sister. But that would mean work for them. And while I was walking from lawyer to lawyer to court to court, I was allowed to hear sayings from my grandmother that I apparently have achieved nothing in my life. Nice to know that some people never change. I'm still struggling with this matter to this day and will probably not be able to fully clarify this until the beginning of 2021.

At the end of October everything seemed to be taking its revenge and I passed out at a friend's house. Nobody knows exactly what happened until today, but my friend took me to the hospital where I had to stay one night. That was Halloween. And I'm such a big fan of hospitals hahahaha hahahaha. After that I was allowed to wear an ECG for 2 weeks and it turned out that my heart values ​​had deteriorated. Why not. Let's just take everything with us this year!

Rounding out the negatives this year was my (as a teenager) best friend's suicide. I have to say that I haven't had any contact with this person for 9 years. However, it is the one who cut herself in her youth and then called me afterwards because she didn't know what to do. It was also the one I tried to get into therapy for 2 years. But her mother was always against it. And it was exactly this mother who was standing in my mother's shop, telling her about her daughter's suicide and that I was probably in the farewell letter. I don't know exactly what it said, but the mother now blames me for her daughter's suicide. And do you know what's craziest about the whole thing? I agreed with her! I really thought it was my fault because I knew how sick my former friend was. Yet I was the one who ended the friendship (for many reasons that had nothing to do with her depression). And I still wonder what would have happened if I had acted differently.

But enough of the negative things! A lot of nice things happened this year too. Among other things, I have found a new job within my group, earn more money and have pleasant working hours. I've renovated my apartment and I've started saving money on a new one. My two nieces are now going to school and I am a proud aunt. My male best friend and his girlfriend (my best harry potter friend) are pregnant and are expecting their first child soon and my mother's health is better.

But one of the best things that happened to me this year is this blog.

I already mentioned that I actually only created this blog to stalk the Big Three. I didn't want my own content at all. But I discovered more and more blogs and these incredibly great MCs that I thought I wanted to do whole too. And so Samantha O'Connell was born.

I received so much great support and encouragement on this platform. I don't think many people even realize how much that means to me. Especially this year.

I have also found great and lovable people here, some of whom I also call my friends. Even if we come from other countries, speak other languages ​​and may never see each other in real life, you are my friends and I am grateful to know you.

@annabelle-tanaka-official : I'll start with you of course! XD on tumblr you are just my best friend. I don't write as much with anyone as I do with you. You are such an incredibly talented person and so warm hearted! Over the year we have invented so many insiders that soon nobody will know what we mean.  Be it the monster hug, or that my cats are your spies or our many RP scenarios, which I really enjoy and which always make me laugh. I thank you for that!! I love you so much and I am so glad that we are friends! *minster hug*

@lunasilvermorny / @lunasilvermore : you are next to you !!! XD the next person I write to almost every day. What started with a little conversation about among us has turned into a friendship. I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to streaming with you next year (and this year)!!! You are such a good listener that strengthens me. Your support is so nice of you too! Just the fact that you have subscribed to my YouTube channel xD (because of the language I even have an idea). I'm looking forward to the next year with you! Thank you so much for dealing with my craziness and still likes me! 

@kyril-hphm : muahahahaha. You can't escape me !!! Yes, what should I say? One of my big three even made friends with me. One of my Senpais noticed me! And then it's a lovely fluffy marshmallow! I still think it's funny  that we have such similar circuits and hearts! Nevertheless you are an incredibly honest, loving and talented person. I've never told you before, but sometimes I stare (for 20 minutes +) at your drawings to improve my style (just not working so far). You are an honest person and I am happy every time we talk, or when you react to my content. I would like to say thank you for that too! You are great and you can trust yourself more.

@carewyncromwell : my Chinese fireball, my Disney princess. Yes, for me you exude the aura of a Disney princess and nothing can change my mind. So! You were one of the first friends I made here on tumblr and one of the first to write with me! I still remember how proud and nervous I was back then! Just when I was in the hospital on Halloween and couldn't sleep that night, you kept texting me and distracting me from my fear. That means a lot to me. You are such a creative and lovable person too. Ah, that's just amazing. Your comments or hashtags always make me grin or laugh. Thank you for all your support and help!

@catohphm : my fluffier Ravenclaw brother!!! Of course you can't be missing either. I also write with you almost every day and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your kind words and your support. I just love the energy between Samantha and Cato. And it's always fun to write RP with you!  Thank you for being such a lovely and kind person!

@mira-shard : MIRAAAAAAA! It's kind of funny how long we've basically walked next to each other without talking to each other. And now I don't want to miss you anymore! You are such a fun and happy person. Writing with you is just fun! I also love your cosplay photos. Someday I'll come to visit you, and then we'll do cosplay shootings together until the camera bleeds! I would also like to thank you for your support and your kindness. 

@sirfluffig : ha. I hope you didn't think you were escaping me! Where should I start with you? Maybe that you were one of the first to give me such lovely feedback on Samantha? Or this super funny stream and that you helped me to stream in English? Or just like that, when we talk about our MCs or pen and paper. It's definitely always fun. I want to thank you for that and I'm looking forward to playing together again soon (get Among us)

@nightrhea-hphm : * run into you in slowmotion * Night! My wonderful supportive Gremlin! I've grown very fond of them over the years. And your support and feedback are just amazing. I also love the friendship between Night and Samantha. I think it's very similar to ours, right? You are also such an incredibly creative and lovable person. You make you feel like it's ok to be who you are. Thank you!

Of course there are many, many more like @rosievixen, @wangxianforever000 , @mollydarling-hphm , @morningstarinwinter , @hogwarts9, @hphm-brooke , @raymondhope-writer , @nikyiscreepy , @immagrosscandy , @mizutoyama , @ariparri-hphm and many many more.

I want to thank you all for your encouragement, support and feedback. You are the reasons why I am adding more and more details to this blog, why I dared to start with the fan comic and many more. 

It's still so amazing for me to meet so many talented, creative, kind and funny people. 

This year showed me again that life isn't just black or white. Life is Grey. Good things and bad things happen. Sometimes one side more than the other side. But as long we are taking the next step, life wl continues. Just keep in mind, as like you support me, I want to support you. So if you ever wanna talk, no matter what, remember you guys can always contact me. 

I'm really looking forward to next year and already have so many plans. I can not wait any longer. Enjoy the last days of the year, stay safe and most important: they the way you are guys! 

Love you all so much. 

#My end of the year thank you #Personal #Ooc #My year 2020 #God my heart beating so fast #Don't know why but these post makes me nervous #Very personal #Cry counter while writing this: 4 #Yeah so adult xD #Like I care #Hope you all enjoyed the Christmas holidays #Love you all #Such a great community #Never saw this before #💙❤️💚💛

[echo-inthevoid]

Season 2 q&a and overall reaction

Jonny stealing everyone's names XD 

Is martin going to be ok!? I also need to know! 

He said no;-; 

ok ya, no one's gonna be ok. 

Ya, he must do sooo much research. 

Ya, except for "fatigue" lol.

Eyyy the mechanisms!! 

What's the red string brigade? Ok, I guess a group of fans theorizing about stuff. 

Oh ok so someone else did martins poetry. Ooh, there's more martin poetry out there! *grabby hands*

Ok ya, Alex clarifying that Jon isn't stupid he just makes poor decisions. Probably if he'd paused and thought about it (like I did lol, I had to go do some stuff in the middle of that ep and thought about it a whole bunch lol) instead of immediately going out and buying an axe and further isolating himself and panicking immediately he probably would have figured it out. This is why it's bad to panic in a crisis guys. 

Eyyy! Jonny's parents voiced Gertrude and Leitner! That's so cool. 

XD Jonny grumbling about having to work with his parents. 

Hmm, I hadn't really thought of Gertrude being like a mother figure in the story? She just seems very cut-throat I guess from what Leitner said. Idk so far I've been very suspicious of her. Especially since that one statement where her photo burned a whole bunch of people or something. She just seems very shady... 

Alex chortling over Jonny's pain. XD

Side note, Every time there's a q&a I just can't stop noticing Jonny's voice going in and out of archivist range? Like most of the time I'm just listening along and then he'll say a sentence a bit grumblier and my brains immediately like "ARCHIVIST! That's THE ARCHIVIST!!" 

Martin would be the last one alive in Friday the 13th! It's official! 

(Is it bad that this gives me hope)

Jon likes Nonfiction, documentaries, and probably collects something just a little bit weird. *writes down for use in potential fics* 

also while im at it I remember jon saying he dislikes coffee at one point,  and so many people have him liking coffee in their fics! This has been your daily reminder of that fact because ever since then it keeps bugging me lol. (But also do whatever u want.)

Alex's spluttering sounds so much like Martin.

Yes!! I want to hear jon sing!! Yes! Musical Episode When!!?

Ah yes yes yes! All the characters are so unique!!? How does he do it!! 

Ya, it being in audio format sometimes makes it hard to understand what's happening in the live-action bits. (Live-action is the wrong word but u know what I mean.)

Oh ok ya, how he mentioned he got a pipe was quite clever I didn't realize that that's why he mentioned it at all. 

Ooh, there's a manga where there's something similar to Michael? I'll have to look that up later...

XD Alex and Jonny arguing about apples. 

Ok, so all the statements we're hearing ARE for reals. I kinda assumed but good to have it confirmed.

They used to hang out together!!? Work function curry nights!! ;-; 

Ya Ya! Who made the leitners!?

"You are assuming a book needs to be written" ...ok then. (but it has to have been created somehow??? Did they just spring fully formed from the powers? why? And why take the form of books?)

Alex's mischievous laugh about whether jon has friends *trembles in fear*

Yes!! Micheal is so good! I'm so happy they love him too! Yesyes! His laugh! 

Ah Yes!! Mary kaey was so creepy! 

XD yes yes yes fatigue was written on zero sleep, I knew it! 

Akskdjdkd I love them so much. Also, I've looked up Michaels voice actor luke booys and he does some other horrory type sketches n stuff and I kiiinda want to do a little animatic with some of those but it's Michael like annoying some poor soul lost in his halls... I think that'd be fun. I wonder if anyone's done that yet? If so someone send me the links I neeeed iiitt :3

Season 2 summary:

Uuuuu ya so this season was really good. I kinda listened to it in bursts of about ten episodes every couple weeks and then have been saving up the reactions to post later so these are usually going up about a week or so after I actually listened to the episode just FYI. 

I also do have a lot of spoilers cause I can't keep myself away from fanfic and people don't always tag for spoilers and I kiiinda wana know what's coming beforehand anyway? Idk it's hard man I get very stressed about what might happen and then also listening to too much at a time is too spooky for my poor little heart so I gotta read the less spooky fanfic to fulfill the hyperfixation you see. (If anyone has fanfic with spoilers only up to season 2 that'd be great btw) 

Anyway, I try not to take spoiler type stuff into account unless I'm just so sure of it I can't really not acknowledge that I know about it. 

Also, can I just talk about Michael for a minute?? Cause he's such a unique character? And I guess maybe there are other characters like him but I haven't ever seen one -tho to be fair tma is only like the third horror thing I've ever really got into (the other two are the SCP Foundation in its various forms and Little Nightmares. Hence why I keep making reference to SCP it's really the only thing I know similar to this.) But he's such a cool concept!!? Like someTHING that still has a personality? He's so not human? Like I get what he says but also I don't really? Idk im pretty sure he's an avatar right? Right?? Idk if that means he was a person at some point? But all this to say that he is probably the most inhuman character I've come across so far and I'm trying to figure out what it is about him that's so "other" to me? Like... I don't really know what Micheal's deal is? he seems to want to be sort of a neutral mischief-maker but also it seems like he keeps getting invested. But also I just love the way he talks about himself. Like he's a monster that has a personality and is fully intelligent but isn't just evil but isn't neutral either and certainly isn't benevolent. Like he's so complex and just,,,, the idea of a "thing" that's got a personality?? I love it? Kind of like dryads or spirits of things? Like the idea that after a long time things gain personality just by existing? Not that that's what Michael is necessarily? but that same sort of concept applies to him I think. Like the way he IS the maze and wants to help but wants to just watch but wants to kill them all. He's just so interestinggggggg. (And another vision of what jon could become?)

 also "es Mentiras" is a beautiful name 💕

So are him and not-Sasha avatars? Not-Sasha also seems completely inhuman and I was under the impression that avatars were (or used to be) human? Or are they like personifications of their power? Do all the powers have personifications of themselves. not-Sasha seems even less human than Michael? Like she seems to just really genuinely enjoy causing fear? Tho I guess we didn't really get to hear a lot of her. She just seemed kinda gleefully angry most of the time we heard from her. Was she... Human once!???

Anyway. Also, can I just talk about leitners line about jon belonging to the eye!!? Just..*chefs kiss* hnnnngg I need more jon grappling with that. I just need more everyone dealing with the fallout post all of the finallies ok? I still need more of jon angsting over his worms scars and stuff and now I also need jon freaking out about belonging to a fear god power thing. 

Also Martin! Is Martin ok? He sure did a lot of yelling which he doesn't usually? Look I love him and he actually thinks before he acts (unlike SOME people *looks at jon*) and he writes poetry and it is pretty good poetry ok!! And he cares about everyone and just wants a happy ending and aaaaa😭

Petition to get some statements from Martin's pov tho? I mean that's not gonna happen cause Jon's the archivist but I want more martin pov!! Maybe we can get some of his poem tapes??? Pls????? 

I feel so bad for Tim. It sounds like he's kinda fallen into despair.

Also Elias!!? Is showing his spooky side!!? He can control cameras and beat a man to death with a pipe!!? This is his "place of powerr"!!? I am afeared!!? At least jon knows he shouldn't trust him now. Oh jeez, I wonder if jon will listen back to the tape and know what happened. Thhhatsss rough. Oh dear, I hope he doesn't feel guilty cause Leitner did keep trying to hurry him and now everyone thinks it was him. Even martin thinks he did it? Wich like I kinda want to hear more of his thoughts on that? How much does he believe that jon did it? Tim certainly seems pretty certain but he's a bit biased and cynical right now so. 

And they were in the maze for DAYS? 

Now I need martin recovering from being stuck with Tim in Michaels maze for days being angry and worried and hungry etc... Dksjdksa knowing jon could be dying RIGHT NOW and there's nothing he can do. Please someone give me the fic links if this exists!! I've already written like 5 drabbles based entirely on spoilers/other fics (which I'll probably post (w/ links to their inspirations) once I'm caught up and can make sure I'm not just completely demolishing cannon lol. 

Leitner didn't even scream or yell or anything when he was murdered. Literally the chillest dude ever. F

Overall super great, Elias is terrifying, let's dive into the next season!!! I've got 2 seasons to finish in like, less than 2 or so weeks(?) if I wana be caught up by season 5 hhhh,,,

Better get started I guess. 

#tma #tma lb #tma liveblog #liveblogging #tma season 2 #season 2 #season 2 q&a #season 2 finale #the magnus archives

[theshinsun]

brace urself, this is for the writing meta ask: 2, 6, 7, 14, 17, 19, 20 (if you need a direction for this... I always wanted to hear more about Bring Me Roses), 21, 22, and 24 bc i'm nosy and still very into your craft. thank you buddy!!

2. Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project

I'm so excited/terrified to finally start my knb college AU. I've been sitting on this idea for almost two years I'm so ready but at the same time I'm so not ready.

The gist is it's every single self-indulgent, chaotic, projection-ridden idea I've ever wanted for these boys all rolled in a big ball of shenanigans and character growth. It's a beautiful mess and I can't wait to make it happen as soon as ANR is done.

6. What character do you have the most fun writing?

This is gonna come right the fuck out of left field, but I love writing Himuro. I have so much fun writing just... snark, and that boy is the perfect outlet, there's no bottom to that salt mine. I remember getting a similar kick out of writing Tsukishima in the past, I just live for sassy dialogue. It ain't much but it's honest work.

7. What do you think are the characteristics of your personal writing style? Would others agree?

My style is very present, I think (which is funny bc there was a time I never would have considered writing present tense) focusing on what's happening and how it makes the character feel in the moment. I like to write specific, detailed imagery, but I try to keep it short and relevant to the scene, so I can move along and focus on what's important. I wouldn't call it fast-paced, exactly, but it is pretty to-the-point. And I think, based on the feedback I've received, that people who read my fics might agree with that. I've heard that my writing is very personal and character-driven, and I think that might be a byproduct of the time I spent writing in first person. Now I write almost exclusively third person limited, but I still like to get in the character's head and tell the story from their "point of view", I guess. 

14. At what point in writing do you come up with a title?

It depends almost entirely on how quick I'm able to come up with a pun lol. Sometimes a fic has a title before I've even written the first sentence, sometimes I have to scramble for something, anything in the last few seconds before I publish it. A lot of the time I'll have a working title like "that one really fucked up aokaga oneshot" for pretty much the duration of writing a new fic… and a lot of the time I'll end up using song titles, even though we're past the days of writing songfics. 

17. Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations?

I think, to a degree, people get different things from my writing than I intended -- which is good! The way a piece of writing can be interpreted completely differently depending on who's reading it is one of the best things about being a writer tbh. I think people might be surprised, though, how different my fics often turn out from how I set out to make them. These days I've usually got a pretty detailed outline for what's going to happen, but even with all the preparation in the world, sometimes a fic will take a sudden detour I didn't expect, or something I wrote before will take on new meaning and change the direction I meant to go in. This definitely happens more with my longer fics, but there are times even with oneshots where I look back at what I set out to write, and what I ended up writing, and they're completely different.

19. Is there something you always find yourself repeating in your writing? (favourite verb, something you describe ‘too often’, trope you can’t get enough of?)

I tend to write a lot of scenes with characters talking while in the car (cars are an intentional motif in ANR, but in something like GWGE there's not actually a lot of narrative purpose to this) I don't know why, maybe because it's a convenient way to have characters talk one-on-one, or maybe it's because I've had a lot of meaningful conversations while riding passenger, couldn't tell you, but it's cropped up more than once in my current fics and will probably feature in some of my upcoming ones (the college AU strikes me as a likely candidate), and I think it's worth taking note of.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

SINCE you mentioned Bring Me Roses, and I never really get to talk about it, pls allow me to go on a lengthy tangent about my most underrated fic of all time. (Like 90% of the reason it's still incomplete almost two years later is because the response when I posted it was so underwhelming, but I still stand by it. Someday I'll finish it, hopefully, if just for myself.) 

I'm so fucking proud of the language in this one. It's not perfect, by any means, but the imagery in my opinion is very strong, and almost every line of dialogue is saying something without really saying it. There are frequent allusions that something happened to Aomine's mother, relatively recently, and that Momoi is worried about him overworking out of grief or guilt, but none of those things are ever actually stated. There's also some pretty heavy implicit flirting between Aomine and Kuroko, even if it's a bit unusual and they're both playing it coy at this stage, the chemistry is there and the interest is mutual. And of course, because it's a florist AU, the flower symbolism… I spent so long researching bouquets, plant husbandry, how to prep and preserve cut flowers, and of course… flower meanings. The main ones that keep getting brought up are dahlias, which have just as many negative connotations as positive ones, including betrayal and instability, but also dignity, creativity and change, and come in a variety of colors shapes and even sizes (Islander or "dinnerplate" dahlias were definitely going to feature in part 2… as well as the connection between them and Aomine's mother). I know a lot of these things might not hit as hard because there's no actual payoff (yet), but still, in terms of "show don't tell" and setting up things to come, I don't think I have a single better example in my fic repertoire, I really went all out with this.

It's a shame I never got to follow through, but I got the impression that there just wasn't a lot of interest, and even if that alone is kind of a dumb reason not to continue, after I worked so hard to pull off what I did, the lack of response really killed my motivation. (I wonder sometimes if it would've been better received if it was an AoKaga fic… actually, I don't need to wonder, I'm sure it would have been, but that's not the story I set out to tell and I'm not going to change it.)

21. What other medium do you think your story would work well as? (film, webcomic, animated series?)

Oh, I'd love to do some of my fics as comics. I even tried it at one point; GWGE was going to be a comic originally, before I decided a multichapter fic would probably be less exhausting (the first couple pages are still floating around in my art tag somewhere, though this was back in high school so the quality is… heh).

22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them?

Yeah… I reread a lot. Usually while I'm working on a new chapter, I'll go over the ones that lead up to it to make sure I don't repeat the same phrases too much and that the continuity lines up, and I'll also admit to going back and just reading my own fics for fun. Sometimes the only one who's written exactly what I want to see is me. 

How I feel about them depends on the fic… some of my older ones are a mix of nostalgia and cringe tbh, but there are some I still genuinely enjoy revisiting from time to time. 

24. Would you say your writing has changed over time?

Oh hell yeah. For… better and worse, honestly. I feel like I've lost some fluidity and confidence in my writing, and it sometimes turns kind of stilted, so I try to overcompensate which results in pretty jarring changes of tone, but at the same time, I've gotten much better with rhythm and syntax, my grammar skills are always improving, and I'm able to incorporate a lot more intentional meaning and subtext without always stating things outright.

#shin speaks #writer woes #this turned out... long #long post #knb #anr #bmr #gwge #aokaga #aokuro #meta #thanks friend it was really fun answering these! #not sure if I need a... readmore break here... ah well #answered

[sugarcookiesandsins]

Hey. So I don't meant to come off as rude or offense, but I'm really curious. I know you're a new blog and that you're friends with Kura, but I feel like you lost a lot of originality you could've had. You basically try to mirror everything she does, which I understand it's also because you admire her and want to be like her, but you can't BE her ... Like for example,,, you use "Jae talks" when it used to be "Jae speaks" lol and now you want amm asks when that's all she's been doing. (1)

This is going to be a long answer, but I feel it prudent to respond to this ask in particular because of the evidence this anon has brought against me in regards to my friendship with Kura ( @re-sugance ). She is free to make of these accusations what she will and whether or not she continues to be friends with me is up to her discretion and judgement. Each point that this anon has brought forward will be quoted and addressed. 

1. “…lost a lot of originality that you could’ve had…basically try to mirror every thing she does…”

    I feel that in no way I have lost any originality. I am very proud of my own ideas for my stories as well as the work I have put into making those ideas into reality through each chapter. Apart from Nymphet Garden, all my stories are independent works that are in no way related to Kura or her ideas for her own stories. As for trying to mirror everything she does, there is no way I could even if I wanted to. Like Kura, every writer on Tumblr is unique in their own way with their own quirks and interpretations for even the most common au’s that may exist.

    True, the mafia!au idea for Charmed was not mine, but then again everyone who writes and reads that genre knows that. What is mine, is my application of the idea to the boys. Their profiles, painstakingly constructed so readers could relate more to the story and to the OC, because isn’t that the goal of any ‘x reader’ or ‘reader-insert’ stories? For the reader to feel like they are that main character. Those are my ideas. So please, if you still believe that I am mirroring her, tell me where. 

2. “…because you admire her and want to be like her, but you can’t be her…”

     I will not deny that I admire Kura; she is an amazing writer with a wonderful gift. Nor will I deny, that I have imagined being able to write like that. All of her readers will agree with me that she had a nuance about her writing that blurs the line between reality and fantasy, making the stories more real to our minds than they should be. And because I understand the art in her works, I also understand that I will never be able to be her.

     I have my own writing style that differs from hers by a mile, but I am not disappointed in it. It is a style that I have created over these last 10+ years that I have been in creative writing. I have developed it through what I have read and through my influences in literature, and especially through my own personality that shows through my voice. I have my own merits in my writing, and if I want to rise in the ranks of the tumblr writing group, I will be doing it with assurance in my uniqueness and not the filched merits of others who have already achieved success. 

3. “…you use ‘Jae talks” when it used to be ‘Jae speaks’ …”

If you really looked through all the tags on my old account, you would have noticed that I alternated between the two, half out of forgetfulness for which I had used before and half out of indecisiveness. When I deleted my original blog, and recreated my second one, I decided on which one sounded better when said aloud. You have no idea how many times I felt like a maniac alternating between both, before I decided that talks sounds better than speaks. Even phonetically the ‘ae’ from Jae and ‘a’ talks have a similar vocal shape when I say both words, making them sound better suited than the transition from ‘ae’ to ‘ea’ if I say Jae speaks. 

4. “…now you want amm asks when that’s all she’s been doing…”

    Yes, her and many other authors. If you would like I can provide you with a list of authors that participate in the ‘ask my muse’ and ‘ask my character’ types of asks as they are very helpful. Personally, I saw them more as a way for me to be forced into thinking more about my characters and their backstories, further than what I have to come up with for the story. They also provide authors with the opportunity to get ideas about possible spin-off chapters or one-shots to create.

    As an author, you have read the story and chapter many times, the repetitiveness sometimes causing us to miss the smallest of details. These details are the wonderful little easter eggs that our readers discover and tell us about. This is why I started opening my inbox to ‘ask my muse’ and ‘ask my character’. 

5. “…you already have an advantage given you are collaborating with her and she has a follower base…”

    This is the most disgusting accusation I have heard. What ‘advantage’ do you think I am trying to gain? What you are insinuating here is that I am using Kura, someone who I personally call a friend, to help boost my own popularity on tumblr. I find this downright disgusting and a direct attack on my character and morals. Yes. I am collaborating her, but you best believe that I am putting my own share of work into this collaboration. I have in no way specially requested her to promote me on her website and the only promotion I have ever gotten from her is her tagging me in our collaboration and by reblogging a one-shot I co wrote with another writer. That to is on her recommendation blog and not her main one. I believe that if people follow me it is because they have read my works and enjoyed them. If you feel like I am using her, please ask her yourself. She is very strong individual who I believe is able to cut people out of her life who she feels are toxic. 

6. “Even your writing style has changed.”

     The beauty of being a writer is the ability to experiment with your writing style. Here I assume you mean that my writing style had changed in an attempt to match hers. Subconscious interference is not something to be taken lightly, and if you find evidence that my writing has changed to match hers, I am also sure that you will find evidence of stylistic qualities that will match Joseph Konrad and Jane Austen as well. As I have mentioned above, I am influenced by what I read. I read Kura’s works with just as much voracity as the works of greats. In light of that, I find it no issue that my writing style had changed; it is changing to improve and to learn. 

7. “….I don’t mean to come off as rude or offensive.” ; “Sorry if this comes off as mean but I’m just curious if you’ve noticed that you’re doing the those things as we do.” 

     I think that the first thing is your attempts at placating me regarding the crude accusations you have made regarding my intellectual property and my character. Do not try to justify your accusation of me using a friend to further my own aims or that I am losing my “originality”. If you are accusing me of such, I believe that you should own up to it. And the first step, is coming off of anonymous and facing me as yourself. Additionally, I wonder who this ‘we’ is that you speak of. This means that there is a group of you that share these ideas. I invite you all to come forward, and not just to me, to Kura as well. I believe she also has the right to see these accusations you are making as it involves her, does it not?

I have addressed every point you have brought forward regarding my ‘mirroring’ of Kura’s blog and writing. This will be the last time I will address such claims as they are demoralizing and with the intent of hurting me. I have confidence in my own writing and wonderful friends who have faith my me and my character; this is all I need.

#jae talks #anon #the final answer #hate anon