#loki- who's going to pay for my therapy thanos
Note
Okay, this is gettin’ real screwed up here.
I watch a lot of TV. Probably too much. And I’ve seen characters beaten to their knees before, sometimes even with collars. And yeah, there’s usually someone standing over them, and it’s been a woman sometimes. The kind of scene we got in episode 5 of Loki is not new ground.
But here’s the thing. In EVERY OTHER SCENE I can remember like this, the person kneeling is the hero. They’ve been brought down, fully humbled before the sneering villain, and in a few minutes something will happen to get them back on their feet again. It’s usually a tense moment, a “what if they break?” that makes you want the hero to win. You aren’t rooting for, or even liking in some cases, the person standing. You’re cheering for the person on their knees.
This doesn’t seem to be the case with the Loki show. Yes, the viewers may be rooting for Loki, but there’s no hatred for Sif there. She’s not proved herself to be a cold, heartless villain, ruthlessly pounding the hero until all he can do is kneel at her feet.
Except…she did kind of do that. But it isn’t treated as something bad. It’s treated more as something Loki deserved, in my opinion. The show wants us to feel like he deserved to get repeatedly beaten up and told horrible things, just for cutting off a lock of Sif’s hair. I’ll grant, it’s peanuts compared to what happened to him in the mythology. But it’s still bad. Especially since they had him acknowledge it, repeat her cruel words back. They’re playing it off as if Loki is still the villain by himself, and is only good because of other people- Mobius, mostly, but Sif is part of that.
That’s not the way Loki’s character is. In the comics particularly, his biggest arcs are always about reinventing the labels given to him, changing “villain” into something good, something he can use, and doing it by himself. Yes, there’s outside influence, but ultimately Loki is the one who decided to change.
The show is not letting him do that. The show is portraying him as a stubborn jackass who refuses to change until other people show him the light- either with psychological torture presented as therapy, or with beating him up a bunch of times until he gives in. The show and its characters are forcing Loki to become good- they aren’t showing him doing it by himself. He is not becoming one of the good guys, he’s being essentially enslaved by them, and the show is passing it off as somehow all that good influence finally rubbed off on Loki’s cold, villainous heart. That’s why him betraying Mobius was shown as so bad even though Loki barely knew him and had been psychologically tortured by him- Mobius is written as a character who can choose to be good, and Loki is written as a character who must be forced to be good.
And something about an entire show revolving around an independent character being treated as a villain, literally enslaved by the “good guys” (back when the show still wanted us to think the TVA weren’t shady as all hell), beaten to his knees with a collar around his neck until he accepts that he deserves to be alone because he isn’t “good” like everybody else…that doesn’t go down right for me.
The TVA being presented in not just a neutral but often reliable light is something I thought would change once Loki literally called out their propaganda and Sylvie called them fascists, but, for some reason the authoritarian genocidalists are not being presented as a bad thing and it irks me too.
It's especially weird because of the way what Loki claims to have wanted by making choices for people and what Mobius claims the TVA do ARE THE EXACT SAME THINGS, except Loki, until the show, hadn't done that of his own volition and was being tortured during the invasion and is treated terribly for something he didn't even succeed in doing, while the TVA successfully erase events on a mass scale but are presented as having a higher (or at best, - equal) moral ground.
The exact same thing was done in Ragnarok where Loki's "turning point" from a tricksy villainous scoundrel happened because Thor left him frying on the ground and gave him a pep talk filled with lies and general slander about how he could be better - and people see that as good because Thor is framed as a hero, and it's because instead of accepting Loki is a complex character they take what the narrative tells at face value and that is that Loki fights the protagonist(s) so he's bad.
I personally don't like the narrative pushing a character that is canonically an abuse victim and attempted suicide and was tortured right after as someone who needs fixing because he's lusting for power and needs it to gain a sense of control during a retcon which is occurring for the sake of calling him a complete bad guy who needs to change (probably because no actual original character development could be thought of?) after he was just confirmed as queer and colloquially (i assume) called a narcissist because of twisted love.
That he deserves to be alone was presented neutrally as a joke even as he was repeatedly getting beaten to the ground, and then both people he could call friends were removed from his immediate vicinity right after.
Loki isn't being presented as a character that has done a huge mix of good and bad in the movies, he's being presented as an oft incompetent idiot that deserves what he gets because he shouldn't have run away from captors, or he cut Sif's hair, or he killed his mother, or he dared to think he had any importance or could do something good, because the truth is he's an evil lying scourge.
"But maybe," Mobius says, "Maybe he wants to mix it up. Sometimes you get tired of playing the same part. Is that possible? He can change?" And everyone's already forgotten that moments before the mission Mobius said to Loki's face that the TVA has pruned a lot of Loki variants because he's so nice! look! he has hope in him when no one else does! It's also easy to forget the "and hey, if it doesn't work, I'll delete him myself," right after because the guy was smiling through it and the scene is followed by Loki really badly trying to explain the logic of being a trickster who everyone knows is a trickster.
A lot of people payed more attention in Ragnarok than to the other Thor movies so it's not a new retcon and people seem fine with the extremely strange take that 'loki is bad but he can do good sometimes,' because the character is more animated and acts foolish and that's generally more fun for comedy, which is fair for people to prefer imo, people find different things entertaining.
But I do solidly hope the show doesn't go that way though and takes a side with Loki on the narrative stance eventually because I've seen a lot of people who just. miss that the TVA's concept is bad. And those who think they're "reforming" Loki. As if the guy needs anything but a break at this point lmao he only got away from Thanos like 2 days ago please just let him rest for a bit he's a fail villain and it's cringe to have your supposed 1st open queer character get beaten to a pulp by Sif and then put wack sexualizing shots for it too :/
it's like the show itself is trying to sell the angle of "Loki is a villain" and I'm a clown who is still wanting that to be intentional because if it is? It could be amazing and playing with how different parties are framed would be s p e c t a cu l ar and could encourage people to reassess the hero coding in other movies including ones Loki was previously in - but we're reaching the last two episodes and I don't feel like that'll happen.
I feel like even if Loki does reach the end of the show as a transformed person it'll be done leaving the audience with "perhaps you're not so bad after all, Loki," and then also give credit to Mobius or Sylvie or whoever else was involved, simply because as even of yet Loki hasn't taken on a lead role in the show. I'd argue he hasn't really contributed anything worthwhile to plot either. As you've said, he's being shown as someone who needs to change but isn't really motivated to. Aw man they better not make romantic love the reason he wants to change.
#no because they're framing things that are humiliating or demeaning as *casual*#I don't even care if they wanted fanservice in the show did it have to be THAT type???#of course it did they don't take the character seriously or consider what they're doing with him despite his legitimate grievances#in a show where Loki's had literally no influence on the main plot but delaying it for the entirety of the Lamentis episode#if i was worse this is where i'd theorize about how Loki isn't a typical 'strong' hero and threatens the fragile masculine ideals of some#like........marvel the F*CK kind of message is this meant to send after Thanos throwing Gamora off a cliff was 'love' and Odin was 'strong'#they've made Loki be embarrassingly bad in fights too and what's up with that?????#''no look he's powerful see he just reversed time on an entire building on his own!!! now watch 2 guards hold him back <3''#bro 2 guards aren't enough if loki wants to escape what movies were you watching bro#you want me to believe this is the guy that went toe to toe with thor and tie-lost because he had tears blurring his vision????#nice try mcu im onto you your writing sucks#the Loki show#loki spoilers#loki show spoilers#im still reeling from Sylvie's backstory of BITING AND RUNNING and that she left the door to the TVA open for so long accidentally??????#im enjoying the show but i'm not going to say it's a good show or even that I see Loki as in-character#he CAN CANONICALLY TELEPORT WHY THE FR*CK WERE THEY SITTING AND WATCHING LAMENTIS BLOW UP#he BROKE the tempad - their ONLY WAY OFF THE PLANET - which was stored in a POCKET DIMENSION - by falling TOO HARD ?????#EXCUSE ME????#put some effort into the story you're trying to sell marvel#the logic with the timelines???? makes NO SENSE??????#the TVA either has no clue what they're doing or the multiverse literally already exists and the sacred timeline continues to be lies#i want to strange Marvel#the entire thing is so entertaining though so im definitely enjoying#ThisPostIsLongerThanMyLifeSpan#TPILTMLS
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There is No Glorious Purpose Chap. 2
Hello, you beautiful Tesseract-loving bastards!
I've been meaning for a long time to update but I've been having a really bad time with the whole motivation thing, and what I had first thought of doing with this fic got thrown in a wood-chipper and sunk with the Titanic... so, I'm trying to pick up the pieces and decide where I want to go with this. I also wanted to do it episodically: Chapter One aligned with Episode One and so on. That has not worked partly due to the issues of the above so, well, I guess we'll find out together!
So sorry for any grammar issues, I did my best to look it over but got too sick of staring at it over and over again in my drafts.
Small Thor cameo!
Chapter Two: You Oafs
“Yeah, well, you’re a mischievous scamp--or at least, the other you is. Been killing our minutemen and stealing our reset charges. Been happening for quite a long time….” Mobius whistled lowly. Loki nodded slowly.
“If you know me or us as well as you say, what need have you of my help?”
“Like I said, mischievous scamp. And I know what makes a Loki tick, sure, but even Sherlock needed Watson sometimes--you do know about them, right? Really fun stories with a super smart detective and his below average side-kick--.”
Loki ignored the rambling, “I agree.” Perhaps then… after… peace? “Just tell me, please… is it true that I directly led to my mother’s death?”
“Hm? Oh, yeah, definitely. Thor was pissed and then he dragged you along to Svart--Svartle… anyway, the planet of the Dark Elves with Jane because she absorbed the Aether. Then you faked your death, again . There’s that ‘doing a horrible thing then getting away,’ again. But Thor totally gets you back on Sakaar with those Obedience Disks. Yeah, yeah… oh, right, you don’t know--and won’t. He slaps one of ‘em on you when you betray him again, then dials it up all the way while he returns to Asguard. For a god, you get put down a lot .” Mobius chuckled.
Loki sucked in a shuddering breath, reverently laid the Tesseract down and stood, “let us catch this scoundrel then.” He faked a smile for the agent.
“Ok,” Mobius clapped and rubbed his hands together, “what a therapy session!”
Loki had a fleeting thought of, “he must be some Midguardian fool, possibly in some relation to Thor,” before he remembered that the all powerful Time Keepers had created the oaf in front of him.
“Ya know, for the record, maybe ‘undying fidelity,’ wasn’t the right thing to say to Thanos. Just saying. But this is good! We’re gonna be a great team.”
~~~@%*^*%@~~~
“Loki,” the orange clock whined on his ‘gifted’ desk. Though still somewhat transparent, Miss Minutes was a fairly good illusion.
“Yes?” He replied pleasantly, blue hand turning the page of a magazine. His slack-clad legs were propped on the desk, fine business shoes not too far from where she stood on a rather large book. The suit replacement of the prison wear wasn’t bad, he, of course, would have done better had he access to his seidr. But it was fine for the time being.
“Are you paying attention?” The angry little clock motioned to the old Midguardian computer screen which read in that same horrible orange color:
LET’S SEE WHAT YA KNOW!
Q2. Thanos has two apples. He eats both but realizes he wants more. He goes back in time 20 minutes and eats the apples again. Does this mean the apples will not have existed in the timeline he left?
No, because time is constantly happening
The question doesn’t matter because a branch cannot change another time branch
Thanos would’ve been hungry prior because the Grandfather paradox already accounted for the change in matter before it’s move.
TVA FILE EDIT VIEW MODE HELP
Of course he was paying attention, and of course he chose not to amuse them! One order after another; feeding off of each other even. He may have bowed to Thanos but he had never kneeled. Not truly. And he clung to that remaining dignity.
“Naturally,” he returned pleasantly. She sighed.
“What happens when a nexus event branches past red line?”
“Ragnarok.”
“Come on, Loki. What is it?... Loki!”
“It is when the TVA can no longer reset a nexus event. Are you satisfied?’
“Right. And that would lead to the destruction of the timeline and the collapse of reality as we know it.” He lowered the magazine lower into his lap and took his feet off the desk.
“Yes, indeed. Are you alive or a recording? Clearly, you can hear me.”
Her big cartoonish eyes moved around, “uh… sorta both?”
“So not an illusion or projection?” He swiped at her with the rolled up magazine.
“Ah!” A small smirk ghosted his face and he went after her again.
“Watch it! Where are your manners? Oh! Hey! Quit it! That is not nice, ya jerk!” She floated and then fazed back into the computer. He gave that ugly thing a few whacks as well. She pouted on the other side of the screen.
“Trainin’ going wel--is that my jet ski magazine? Put it down, Blue-Raz.” Mobius ripped the magazine from him, swivelled to his desk then swiveled again to flop a jacket in front of Loki.
“Gear up, there’s been an attack. Let’s go.” The agent commanded. Loki picked up the jacket. It unfolded from the collar, back facing him. “VARIANT” was emblazoned across it.
“Ah,” was all he commented as he moved to slip it on before his handler got any ideas while he was led down hallways. Norns knew the agent would have plenty of examples in his own life up to that point, much less his future or other variants.
“Good. Yeah. Smart.” Mobius commented with his fists in a move reminiscent of excited warriors as said human stopped to look back at his charge and the newly bestowed article of clothing. B-15 gave her usual droll stare. Her minutemen stood around her in a group.
“ C-20 and her team went dark shortly after they jumped into the 1985 branch. All signs point to another ambush. We've grabbed enough temporal aura to know it's our Loki Variant.”
The “actually dangerous” sort, Loki groused silently. Then Mobius opened his mouth.
“Here's the deal. When we get out on the branch, we're not just looking for a Time Criminal. We're looking for a Loki. A variation of this guy. A type we should all be very familiar with, because the TVA has pruned a lotta these guys, almost more than any other Variant. And no two are alike. Slight differences in appearances, or not so slight. Different powers, although, powers generally include shape-shifting, illusion-projection, and my favorite... Duplication-casting. Illusion-Projection.”
Mobius gestured to him when applicable in his little speech, also projecting other variations of Loki with his TemPad--all assumedly pruned likewise. Variation 8: L6792 looked exactly like he would now had he’d been afforded the luxury of keeping his clothes, but also with slight differences that led Loki to think that that variant must have been favored royally in some way he was rejected.
Variation 8: L1247 looked like a Midguardian sportsman happily holding a trophy of some kind. Variation 8: L6792 was an atrocity of him and the Hulk combined. Variation 8: L8914 was more strongly built with more prominent hair curls in their longer hair. They stood like dignitary with their hands behind them. Variation 8: L7803 looked like an oaf. A full, half-face helmet emblazoned with the horns in the wrong direction and even a piece of turf over the shoulder like a cape. Oh, dear….
“No.”
“...Huh?”
“Those two powers are completely different, although, I am unsurprised you cannot comprehend it.”
“Loki, what are you talking about--look, I’ve dealt with more of you than you’ve dealt with yourself.”
“The truth remains that those powers are not the same.”
“Then, please, Loki, tell me.”
Loki smiled easily and supplicatingly at the contempt and patronization, just like talking to anyone in Asguard.
“ Illusion-projection involves depicting a detailed image from outside oneself, which is perceptible in the external world, whereas duplication-casting entails recreating an exact facsimile of one's own body in its present circumstance, which acts as a true holographic mirror of its molecular structure.”
“Ok, take a breath. Noted. We’re gonna break into two teams, including myself and Professor Loki here”
B-15 still looked unamused and dubious.
“Whoever the Variant is, we haven’t been able to find them so I’m the Sherlock and he’s my Watson. Look, this’ll work.” Mobius said to her. She side-eyed Loki, Loki who had nothing but a branded jacket to protect himself with.
“And so my agency in this is to… tell you how brilliant you are.”
“Go outside, maybe touch some grass.” Mobius returned with a tilted smile under his twisted nose.
“Ah. I shall protect myself with your wit, then, should this superior being choose me as a next target.”
Mobius chuckled and mimed “talky-talky” again.
He passed through the portal B-15 had summoned, closed in on both ends by TVA agents. Immediately, he could feel his seidr swell within him again and redonned his Aesir glamor. The choker chafed as he glanced around, and he found himself much preferring the biting metal of the chains he was usually imprisoned in. The place they passed into was a celebration of old Midguardian times, further back than what the TVA modeled itself after, in direct juxtaposition of the modern technology with the humans held in their hands, and had used to both get to the location and create their sometimes elaborate costumes.
“Apex of nexus signature located, ma'am,” a minuteman said as they walked.
“Allow me to ask you this, why do we not travel to the moments prior to the Variant’s attack, to when they arrive.” Loki asked as the tent grew ever nearer.
“Nexus events destabilize the time flow. This branch is still changing and growing, so you gotta show up in real time. Did you watch any of the training videos you were supposed to?”
The minutemen twisted their batons, the ends glowing a shade that seemed to haunt the TVA as they neared.
Loki chuckled a laugh that was never and would never be heartfelt, “my dear Sherlock, you should know I am quite the scholar. But these ‘reset charges,’ they ‘prune’ a branched timeline which ‘allows time to heal all wounds.’”
Mobius made an odd gesture towards him, “he’s on it.”
Within the dark, torch-lit tent, limp minutemen laid about the displays which held real weapons and a large, stepped seating construct. Their bodies were splayed out in obvious struggle. Unactivated batons laid around as well, a few clenched in hands. A helmet bearing “C-20” laid, discarded within the scene. Loki hovered a hand over one display as he passed and they grouped around the scene.
“So he's taking hostages now?” B-15 spat.
“The Variant's never taken a hostage before,” Mobus returned.
“Maybe he's upping his game.”
“Or he pruned her,” a minuteman remarked.
“A Loki couldn't have gotten the jump on C-20.” B-15 returned.
“Fan out and search for her. And hurry up, we're at three units until red line.” B-15 ordered, her minutemen immediately moving to obey.
“Let's go. She's right.” A peon echoed.
Mobius concurred, “Come on.”
“Wait….” Loki said, brow knit as he studied the scene.
“What do you see?” Mobius asked as he stepped away from the entrance.
“I see wolf’s teeth.”
“Yeah, ok,” Mobius motioned for him to hurry and Loki got brief satisfaction that the human had no idea what he was talking about.
“‘Where there are wolf’s ears, there are wolf’s teeth,’” Loki echoed one of many sayings he heard during his childhood, especially before bed. He swallowed down the thought of a certain story about blue, darkly lined and vicious monsters.
“Ridiculous, really,” he laughed hallowly, “my people are gullible fools by nature. You remind me of them; the Time Variance Authority and the great gods of Asgard. One and the same. Drunk with power, blinded to the truth. Those you underestimate will devour you, and we’ve just walked into a wolf’s mouth.” He raked his eyes across his audience as he spoke, kneeling down in front of the helmet and stroking his hand in the grassy turf. The minutemen seemed to falter ever so slightly, B-15 rolled her eyes, and Mobius stared.
A TemPad beeped, “two units, he’s wasting our time.”
“No, step outside this tent and my other Variant will devour you,” Loki stated plainly. It was easy, nearly in a terrifying way, how he fell into the usual routine he had had with his oaf of a brother and his lackeys, who, similarly, never headed his words.
“We need to look for C-20.” B-15 repeated.
“Come on, Loki, we don’t have time for your lies.”
“Oh, I am not lying, and out of curiosity, when you find them, will you prune us both seeing as you will not have any need of me?”
Mobius sighed and gesticulated like a frustrated middle-aged Midguardian, “he’s lying.”
Loki’s head turned to the side minutely, in a ghost of a head shake. His stomach turned the way it usually did when he knew things were about to--.
“Aghr!” A minuteman had exited and had been consequently slaughtered. A brawl broke out just outside the small entrance. Innocent event-goers made exclamations outside as well. Batons revved, and B-15 and Mobius stalked to the opening. Loki walked behind them.
“The charge!” Someone yelled. The fight continued. A cloaked figure with amazing skill in combat fought them all while a crowd of civilians formed around them. There were a few smiles and jeers, no doubt thinking it was all a show.
“On behalf of t-... the Time Va-...Variance Authority, I hereby-... arrest you for-... for crimes against the… Sacred Timeline, V-… Variant!” B-15 huffed between blows.
“Ergh!” A minuteman got pruned. Loki’s cloaked variant said nothing, only continued fighting. He backed back into the tent, took aloft a jousting lance, broke it half and reemerged. For all their combined ability, the TVA was losing. The glow of pruning swung around arbitrarily. He dipped into the fight and caught his counterpart’s cutlass in the cross the two ends of the lance made.
“Pardon me, I mean no intrusion,” he said calmly to his other self, noticing a similar collar of metal that had adorned his own garments. He could feel the other’s tension as they reclaimed their sword and focused solely on him. It proved more of a poor decision than anticipated and he found himself holding his breath in pain more than he’d wanted. The wood was also useless and even though both it and he put up a valiant fight, his other self had taken hold of a baton along the line. His weapons were useless as they continued to share blows. He lowered the stubs of wood and opened his arms. The glowing end came close.
Then it wasn’t.
The grunting that followed was B-15 and Mobius disarming the variant of the baton and nearly restraining them.
“About to redline!” A remaining minuteman nearly yelled. B-15 and Mobius shared a look. A door was opened and Loki found the cloaked figure disappearing into a flurry of gold.
“What in the Rolling Stones was that, Blue-Raz?!” Mobius had him hard by the shoulder of both his jacket and dress shirt.
Loki blinked once then made eye contact with Mobius, “what ever do you mean?”
“He was about to kill you!”
“Prune,” Loki politely corrected. Mobius gawked.
“I kno--what were you thinking?!”
“Your only use of me is to capture me, I was assisting in that.”
“By letting you be killed by yourself?!”
“A mere distraction to the larger goal, Mobius.”
“And it almost worked,” B-15 piped from somewhere beside them. Her voice had dropped a tone or two.
“Yeah… almost had ‘im too.” Mobius admitted, letting Loki go. “But seriously, man, what was that?”
“Nearly fulfilling my role, as you yourself stated.” Loki replied pleasantly.
“We also barely pruned it in time and got outta there with our lives.” B-15 stated.
“Yeah…” Mobius rubbed the back of his head with his other hand on his hip as he stared at the floor. I was not lying, Loki wanted to say. To push. To scream. But he instead focused on the ache in his back. It should be fine in a matter of a few more hours given the time he had for recovery before the Tesseract opened the portal in New York and he was knocked from the Mind Stone’s, and thus Thanos’, direct influence.
~~~@%*^*%@~~~
Loki subconsciously touched his hideously blue palm as he waited outside of the judge’s office for his handler. The doors were decorated with sandglasses. How quaint .
Mobius finally emerged, stalking right past him. Loki fell in step behind him. He realized such only after he’d done it.
An angry finger wagged in front of him as they walked, “one thing, Loki, that’s all I asked.”
“The ‘talk’ from earlier.”
“No! Catching the superior version of yourself. We lost guys out there today-- good guys!” Good, yes, ‘good guys’ who also happened to have erased who knows how many people from existence.
“There would have been a lot more had I not been there and, likewise, a lot less had I been heeded.”
“And there you go again. That narcissism! Do you ever stop? Get tired of yourself?”
Loki didn’t respond as Mobius stopped and whirled on him, only gave him his schooled expression.
“I’m on thin ice ‘cause of you. I saved you, remember that? Didn’t that mean anything to your Asguardian standards or personal morals or anything?”
“If you recall, I was about to meet that fate regardless as I helped you bring in my Variant. I also have little doubt you will delete me if I survive assisting you in their arrest either way.”
“Oh, so I’m the bad guy? Ok. Well that other you is worse, remember that. He’s killed a lot of people--more than you. You’re just a little blue ice runt, crying in the cold.”
Loki chuckled and didn’t even need to bite back the urge to correct this “Loki expert.”
“Ever get tired of playing this same old part?” Mobius continued bitterly, “I’m getting sick of your constant need for sympathy, Loki!”
“Mobius?” He asked after allowing a few minutes to pass.
“What?” Mobius mumbled.
“This other Variant is after reset charges, why not supervise another ‘pruning’ in case we find the correct branch they target. How many happen in a day, usually?”
~~~@%*^*%@~~~
Loki almost choked when they entered into an Aguardian hall. The was beautiful and towering and held stones and architecture he could rewrite the books about. For one blissful second, he closed his eyes and inhaled the scent of his homeland--or the place he was raised. His glamor fell over him unconsciously.
Then he had to play follow-the-leader with the TVA peons. He rounded a large corner and immediately knew how many steps it would take to get to his room, his mother’s and Thor’s.
“Loki?” A familiar voice boomed. Loki tensed. Mobius cast him a “good luck” glance and mumbled, “I’ll be back for ya, Blue-Raz”
Loki had the urge to run him through followed by his brother who should not—it didn’t matter, the timeline would be reset. The Thor bounding up behind him would be pruned with everything else… why did that hurt? He turned to face his adopted sibling.
“Loki, it is you? Isn’t it? I mean you look horrendous in that getup, but it’s you!” Thor held his hands out in what could only be described as reverence. But the esteemed Asguardian Prince was wearing dirty Midguardian clothes and had a beer gut to match. How? Barely any time had elapsed between that moment and when they were facing down in New York.
“It is me but what happened to you, brother?”
A shadow came over Thor’s face. His hands lowered and he reached out to Loki.
“Tell me the truth,” he whispered, “did you just escape the dungeons?”
Loki held his gaze for a few long moments. The timeline will be reset. There is no harm in it.
“No, Thor, I never—this me never went to the dungeons. Never came back to Asguard.”
Thor hissed an inhalation of breath as his eyes widened.
“Thor what happened to you? Why do you have mismatched eyes? Where is your armor? Or Mjolnir?”
“Oh, Loki! Loki. Loki. Loki.” Thor’s voice trembled with false laughter and an emotion Loki didn’t know, “what--you look horrendous. What in the Nine Realms are you wearing?”
“Thor, it is good to see you, but I’m afraid I don’t have the time for a chat.” Loki returned, clipped. Redline grew ever nearer.
Thor’s face fell again, “Loki… just tell me you’re alive. That I didn’t fail you on the Statesmen--Thanos is dead now, I-I killed him! I-... I killed him… I avenged you.”
“Oh, Thor,” Loki found himself saying as Thor’s eyes shined and tears spilled onto his cheeks. He allowed himself to be squeezed in the other’s arms… and found it to be the best hug he’d ever received… or the only hug….
“Thor… Thor, are you listening?” Thor only sobbed into his shoulder, holding Loki up against his beer gut and off of the actual floor.
“Y-yes?”
“Very soon, this timeline will be reset which means you will have never seen me here. So tell me, what happened to you?”
Thor whined in the back of his throat and plopped Loki back down, it was just hard enough to make pain spike up his nearly healed spine.
“I--You--Thanos--.”
Loki laid his arms on Thor’s biceps, squeezing gently, Thor shuttered then took a breath and smiled fondly at him. Fondly. Thor never did that. What sort of--how is he not the Variation?
“So after Ragnarok, Thanos… had all the Stones and killed half of what was left of Asguard including you. I wasn’t able to--I’m sorry.”
“Just tell me, Thor, I am right here.”
“Then I was found by the space morons and went to Nidevelir to forge Storm Breaker because Hela broke Mjolnir before Sakaar--Ragnarok happened because of her. Then we battled with the Avengers in Wakanda and… I didn’t go for the head! How could I have not gone for the head?! Thanos snapped and…. It was horrible, brother. Absolutely horrible. The whole universe. And so many extinctions followed and more tragedies. I-....” He hung his head. “I tried to drown my worries like the ‘oaf’ I am….”
“I thought your annoying little group was the ‘Avengers’ not the ‘Alcoholics.’”
“... Ha!” Thor slapped him on the back. The statement seemed to have brought about the intended reaction.
“Yes! Of course! So five years later, we found him and I slayed him! But Tony and Scott found a way to move through time to get the stones to undo it all, and so we did, and we succeeded! But still, Thanos haunted us and we had a final battle--which we won!” Thor seemed to have noticed himself that he was about to go into one of his long winded stories of victory, and cut it short.
Then his smile abated and his beard fell, “Loki, Steve and Tony lost the Tesseract in 2012 to you…?”
“Yes, yes, that would be me, brother.”
A gasp of breath as Thor readied himself for the most bone crushing hug in the universe was all that was afforded to Loki.
“Thor,” he wheezed slightly, “I know I was not kindest to you but must you kill me prematurely?”
“Oh, Loki! I never threw you off the Bifrost, and I-!”
“Charge is set, we gotta boogie!” Mobius interrupted, jogging over.
Thor allowed the interruption if only to interrogate him, “and who are you? How and why do you command my brother? If you are with Tha-!”
To Loki’s astonishment, a few electrical charges emanate off of his brother.
“No, time to talk. Put Loki down We gotta get outta Dodge.”
Thor’s grip tightened, “Thor, just do it!” Loki groused. Thor did. Mobius opened the portal.
“Sorry, big guy, big fan but I need your Buddy. You ever think of trying Old Spice?”
“Ah--I just--Loki just returned to me as he always does and you expect me to just give up?!”
“Thor, do not follow us, I would rather not see you get deleted.”
Heavy feet crossed through the yellow threshold and left 2023 Thor in 2014 with a gaping mouth and tear stained cheeks.
“So no Loki!” Mobius announced as he clapped his hands together, “that means we gotta get to work!” He went on to walk at a brisk pace. Loki trailed after, blinking back the stinging in his now red eyes.
“I was of the understanding that is what we were doing,” he put a hand over his throat while he cleared it.
“I need you to go over each and every one of this Variant's case files, and then, give me your... How do I put it?... Your unique Loki perspective. And who knows? Maybe there's something that we missed.”
Seeing as how you are so hypocritical, I would be surprised if you had not missed anything. Honestly, “all you Lokis are the same” yet in the same breath, “no Loki variant is exactly alike.” I think as I do.
“You are the expert, I trust your judgement” Loki said instead.
“That's why I'm lucky I got ya for a little bit longer. Let me park ya at this desk. And don't be afraid to really lean into this work. Here's a good trick for you: pretend your life depends on it. I'm gonna get a snack.”
For all his countless hours spent in not only the Grand Library, but others around Asguard and the other Realms, he found himself having little interest in sifting through all the instances in which that other version of him overcame the great TVA and triggered more animosity against themselves--and all other Lokis.
“Any motive, Sherlock?” He asked dryly.
“That’s what you’re for!” The agent chuckled, poked at his chest and walked away.
Out of the corner of his eye, he watched the agent walk away then turned his attention to the paperwork. The pattern was known to begin with but became… inane the more pages he flipped through: nexus event, dispensed TVA agents, the team goes silent, they’re found dead and without the reset charge, Mobius, the expert, is called in for investigation and then the branch is reset before redline.
One Loki… only one to best their happy little teams. I was bested, but I also have extenuating circumstances of the past year. Without Thanos’ interruption, could I have?... Yes, I fought alongside Thor and his foolish troup of warriors, I would have been able to exact my own damage. For a ‘timeline protection force,’ how are they schooled in combat?
“Pardon me,” he tapped the librarian’s bell. She turned to him with a nonplussed expression.
“Could you show me to the combat regimens of our dear agents?”
“No.”
“Infographics?”
“No.”
“Battle end-games?”
“No.”
“Well, you have been very helpful, thank you.” It was still a library after all and he more than knew his way around one seidr or not; his mind was still intact--somewhat intact and that had always been his greatest weapon.
So he sat back down at the table to form a plan of action, so to speak, of how he could find the files he wanted in the fastest and most assured way. But, he still had all the paperwork of this other Loki, dripping in red. Oozing. Gushing. Like Thor’s cape as yet more enemies were put to ruin under his brother’s sheer might. He never envied that red; never thought he could own it or have it become him… yet this other version had jumped--leapt into that pool of blood and ended all who stood in their way. Incapacitation would have sufficed. Has sufficed in innumerable cases. He’d both saved lives of his comrades and stupid brother, and saw the end goal in such a way.
He gasped and leapt up, running along the railing of the library.
“Mobius--.”
“No, I said, ‘don’t bother me until you’ve read all the files,’ and I know you don’t read that fast.” Mobius set his Js\osta down with a hard thonk .
“I have, but unimportant--.” Loki slid into the seat across from the agent in the cafeteria.
“No, read every file pertaining to the Variant.”
“The answer does not lie in the files, it lies on the timeline!” Mobius gave him a dangerous look at the slight raising of his voice. Loki took a breath.
“Look,” Loki began again with his arms fanning over the table, “they’re hiding in apocalypses.”
“Which one? There’s, like, a million?”
“Take Ragnarok, I assume you are familiar?”
“Yeah, total destruction of your weird coin planet and most of its people because of your sister Hela. I’m sorry.”
Sister? Hela? Thor mentioned her--unimportant now.
“Yes, well, that recent visit with Thor got me thinking…?”
Mobius regarded him but eventually sighed and sat back, making a small gesture, “yeah, sure, ok.”
“Nexus events happen when someone does something that is not meant to happen--.”
“A bit more complicated but yeah.”
“These can culminate into entire other timelines--.”
“Chaotic alterations of a predetermined outcome.” Loki did his best to ignore the interruptions. He forced animation into his movements as if trying to explain it to Thor. That was best, pretend he was explaining something that now seemed so basic to the warrior.
“Alright! So this is Asgard,” he plundered the agent’s salad bowl. Said agent gave sad push back. Loki continued.
“I could travel back to Asgard preceding Ragnarok and do whatever I wished; switch crowns, resoil linens, topple some columns. I could destroy the Rainbow Bridge.” He grabbed the small salt shaker and started pouring some in. Mobius mourned his food. Loki was not fed.
“None of this would matter. Not if I set fire to the courtyard. Or even killed the Allfather!”
“Why--Lo--God, Loki!”
“Excuse me,” Loki greeted Casey kindly at an adjacent table, “are you finished with this?”
Casey, who had his bunched napkin thrown on his plate in clear sign of being finished looked from his crumpled juice box to Loki, “you!”
“Yes, very nice to see you again,” Loki took the drink container and poured it into the salad, secretly relishing how the agent utterly deflated.
“Due to Surtur!” Loki finished.
Mobius rubbed his hand down his face, “what am I lookin’ at?”
“Apocalypses, Holmes.”
“Loki, you just apocalypse my lunch, I wanted to eat that!”
“You want my other Variant.”
Mobius leaned onto the table, “cut to the chase.”
“That is how they have escaped you for so long; no matter what happens, an apocalypse negates anything that would otherwise summon the TVA.”
“Oh, not bad. Not Bad. Hey, so, how do you weigh over five hundred pounds?”
That was a “jackknife”--as Midgaurdians may say--that he did not expect.
Mobius raised his hands, “hey, I’m not judging, just curious.”
“Focus, Mobius, please.”
“Ok, ok. My salad. Destroyed.” Another despondent hand waved at the bowl.
“I can show you my theory is true.”
Mobius laughed, “I’m not letting you go.”
“You come with me, naturally,” Loki pushed.
“Well, I’ve had enough of your troublemaking for one day.”
“No one has to know unless I am correct--which I am.”
“TVA agents can’t just go running around anyway. Waltzing into the White House would be a Nexus event.”
You are not listening!
“Pompeii, for instance, you Midguardians like talking about that catastrophe, we could go there!”
“Pompeii?”
“Pompeii. Everyone died and that town was not even the worst hit of the eruption of Vesuvius.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Talk, talk, talk. Oh, you’re so smart!” Mobius sneered and wiped his mouth with his napkin despite not having spilled anything much less eaten enough to make a mess of his face. No food for either of them it seemed.
“If I go along with this and you stab me in the back, you’re getting erased. Capische?”
“Understood,” I am fully expecting that regardless.
#loki#loki series#loki show#Loki Show Rewrite#loki series rewrite project#loki series rewrite fanfic#loki fanfic#loki fanfiction#cannon non-compliant#gentle reminder that just because a character says something doesn't make it true
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My thought process watching Endgame (spoilers btw):
(This is very long, I wrote this as I watched, knew Tony and Nat would die but I didn't know when. It's a chaotic mess of me screaming and sobbing the whole movie. Please enjoy.)
-So I started crying two minutes in.
-THE BARTONS 😭.
-TONYYYYYY.
-Carol you little shit.
-NaTaShA rOmAnOfF sToP bReAkInG mY hEaRt.
-Nat's hair is awesome.
-Scottttttt.
-OH MY GOD IT'S A MINI TONY OH MY GOD MORGAN IS SO ADORABLE.
-nats broken.
-BRUCE PLEASE OH MY GOD I DUNNO WHAT TO THINK BUT IT'S BORDERING ON YOU'RE A NATIONAL ICON.
-MORGAN MY DEAR DONT SWEAR.
-Tony please don't make me cry with your great parenting.
-I LOVE YOU 3000 PLEASE I CANT DO THIS. NATASHA AND BRUCE PLEASE THEY'RE AWESOME.
-SCOTT-
-"oh thank god." *clutches pearls*
-"TIME TRAVEL"
-HELLO TONY
-GREAT JOB TONY JUST JINXED YOURSELF
-nebula.
-BRUCE IS THE MOST PURE MAN
-WHAT IS THIS???
-BRUCE???
-heeeeya Valkyrie
-OH WOW THOR'S A WHOLE ASS DISASTER
-OH MY GOD NOT THE FORTNITE
-"yes, I'm fine, why?" *is a literal mess*
-"wuzzit natahjhaaa"
-CLINT OH MY GOD
-I'm gonna say it now and it'll be said again later, Clint should've died.
-NATASHA PLEASE STOP CRYING
-thor's a damn disaster
-THE SUITS OH MY GOD
-Clint's such a mess
-Thor and Clint need psychiatric help. They all do. But those two especially.
-Nat needs therapy, she's so beyond deoressed.
-oh Thor...
-Nat taking notes 😅✋🏼
-THE WALK
-I LOVE IT
-"see ya in a minute" NATASHA NO
-BRUCE IS TOO PURE FOR THIS WORLD
-HULK-BRUCE OWNS MY HEART
-MISS GIRL THE FUCK YOU JUST DID???
-JANEEEEE???
-"the chick with the antenna."
-HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THOR'S EYES ARE DIFFERENT COLOURS
-Clint should've died.
-WHAT HAPPENED IN BUDAPEST???
-gamoraaaa
-ugh thanos.
-"Mr Rogers I forgot about that suit it did NOTHING for your ass." TONY PLEASE-
-hulk vs stairs is my aesthetic.
-"medic medic. This guy needs some help."
-LOKI FOR FUCKS SAKES
-ugh they didn't factor in so many things... This will be a mess...
-JANE JANE JANE JANE JANE
-Frigga and Thor ohhhhhh
-"eat a salad"
-DANCE BREAK WITH QUILL
-NEBULA WHAT IS HAPPENING
-FUCKING HELL
-fuck fuck fuck
-I wonder if we'll see Peggy...
-OOP
-BAHAHA HOWARD AND TONY
-HOWARD POTTS PLEASE
-We should go pay a visit to S.H.I.E.L.D so we can go say hi to Peggy- OH IT'S PEGGY HI PEGGY
-PEGGY OH MY GOD I LOVE HER SHE HAS A PICTURE OF STEVE ON HER DESK AND SHE'S OLDER NOW OH
-oh tony and howard.
-heads up I'm crying again.
-JARVIS
-JARVIS JARVIS JARVIS JARVIS JARVIS OH MY GOD I MISSED YOU YOU'RE SO OLD OH I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AH PLEASE MY HEAR CANT DEAL WITH THIS
-welp. Nebula.
-UGH NO THIS IS WHERE NAT'S GONNA DIE
-why does Clint use a katana now???
-"oh good."
-NAT'S GONNA DIE SOON
-CLINT YOU SHIT WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST JUMP YOU DIPSHIT LITTLE MOTHER FUCKING ASSHOLE???
-I CANT SEE THE SCREEN I'M CRYING TOO MUCH
-NATASHA
-NATASHA NO PLEASE NO IT'S NOT OKAY NATASHAAAAAAA
-I'm having a breakdown so it's time for a pause
-goddamnit natasha.
-I love you so much don't do this to me.
-no death has hit me harder ever in the history of my life.
-we lost nat.
-BRUCE 😭
-MY HEART IS IN SO MUCH PAIN.
-she's gone...
-nat 😭
-YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT IT SHOULD'VE BEEN YOU.
-bruce🥺
-we love you so much natasha. rest in peace sweet dear.
-FUCKING HELL EVIL NEBULA
-everybody comes home.
-not natasha though.
-Bruce. I swear to fucking god.
-FUCK
-BRUCE??
-DID IT WORK???
-ARE THEY HOME NOW?
-THEY'RE OKAY
-OH
-WHAT'S HAPPENING???
-WANDA BABY PLEASE COME AND SAVE THEM
-OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD
-NOT AGAIN PLEASE NO
-STUPID MOTHER FUCKING THANOS
-gamora???
-WHERE'S MY BABY WANDA???
-OH SHIT
-why tf is thanos such a damn dick. Like, sir?
-*cue our perfect little baby wanda???*
-I really miss Nat...
-GODDAMNIT EVIL NEBULA
-FUCK YEAH GAMORA
-peace out evil nebula
-Wait- when the hell does Tony die? I've never seen pics of his death... I WON'T BE PREPARED
-STEVE???
-STEVE WITH THE HAMMER PLEASE
-NO STEVE'S SHIELD
-we really need wanda right about now...
-like, really
-OH HI GUYS I MISSED YOU SO MUCH
-HI PETER OH MY GOD I MISSED YOU BUD. TONY DID TOO
-YES.
-FUCK. YES.
-THE QUEEN HATH RETURNED
-WANDA! WANDA! WANDA! WANDA!
-OH HI PEPPER!
-AYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
-i miss nat...
-ASSEMBLE!
-FUCK. YES.
-OH MY GOD LOVE IT
-"you have the little one."
-TONY AND PETER
-"oh. This is nice."
-MY HEART FEELS HAPPY. THESE ARE SEMI HAPPY TEARS. OKAY??? SEMI HAPPY. I'M KINDA OKAY RN.
-GAMORA PLEASE-
-LA CUCARACHA???
-OH FUCK YEAH THIS IS SO COOL
-GO T'CHALLA
-NO T'CHALLA
-WANDA
-WANDA
-WANDAAAAA
-FUCK YOU THANOS
-"you will."
-WANDA REALLY SAID, "I give you, some bad bitch shit."
-not wanda single-handedly taking down thanos
-oh no, is little thanos scared??? /s
-PLEASE PETER
-oh pepperrrrr
-it stopped..?
-OH HI CAROL? I'M ASSUMING IT'S YOU?
-YEAH IT'S CAROL BEING A BAD BITCH.
-CAROL AND WANDA REALLY SAID," FUCK YOU I'M BETTER THAN ALL Y'ALL PUT TOGETHER!"
-The Girls™ (and Peter)
-UGH THE POWER THESE WOMEN HOLD
-nat would've really pulled it all together...
-"IM A BAD BITCH YOU CANT KILL ME" - The Girls™
-there's 35 minutes left and I just realized the pain isn't over yet.
-I'll finish just before midnight tho.
-CAROL
-FUCK
-OH HELL YEAH CAROL
-BAHAHA PLEASE
-shit shit shit
-OH NO TONY-
-BAHAHAHA
-NO TONY
-Tony's gonna die now...
-"nat, we won." "what'd it cost?" "everything."
-thanos is gone.
-OH TONY PLEASE.
-OH RHODEY
-PETER😭😭😭
-"we won mr stark."
-OH PEPPER I'M SO SORRY
-"hey pep."
-"we're gonna be okay. you can rest now."
-PEPPER
-NO TONY PLEASE TONY NO
-rest in peace tony. we love you.
-OH PEPPER I'M SO SORRY
-please i can't take this anymore.
-UGH I CANT DO THIS I CANT DO THIS I CANT I CANT I CANT
-MORGAN YOU POOR BABY YOUR DADDY LOVES YOU 3000 SWEET GIRL
-PROOF THAT TONY STARK HAS A HEART 😭
-this hurts too much.
-that's gay.
-OH NICK
-wow really Carol? A full damn pantsuit.
-wanda my poor sweet baby your mom loves you.
-"she knows. they both do"
-MORGAN WANTS CHEESEBURGERS PLEASE THIS HURTS
-HAPPY GIVE THAT LITTLE GIRL EVERY CHEESEBURGER IN THE UNIVERSE
-there's tears pouring down my face, snot dripping out of my nose. My heart has never in it's entire life been this broken before
-i have a headache from crying so much.
-"yes please please knives."
-"I am groot."
-we know bruce. we miss her too.
-that's also gay.
-he's not coming back, is he?
-no he's not.
-he's going back for peg.
-who da?
-IT'S OLD STEVE WHAT-?
-why does he look like biden?
-70 years of character development down the drain.
-OH THE RING-
-OH HE GOT TO MARRY PEGGY-
-I LOVE THIS SONG WITH EVEEY FIBER OF MY BEING OH PEGGY I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU
-OKAY SO LIKE-
-WOW.
-wow.
-I'm crying again because of this song and the dance with Peggy and Steve-
-my brain is overloading. I have a really big headache, very emotionally drained. Best movie. By far. The amount of pain I felt. I've never been this heartbroken before. 3000/10. why are end credits making me cry?
-NATASHA I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU
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hola - welcome to another reaction post
Agents of SHIELD - s7ep11: Brand New Day (WARNING – SPOILERS (obviously))
- So straight off the bat, reading the tagline, looks fun - “(in order to win against Sibyl/Nathaniel) they’ll have to get creative, and maybe even a little out of this world.” Intriguing. Looks like we could be in for some fun stuff this episode, but I’m really wondering how we’re going to turn this all around in just three episodes (counting the finale as two), so I’m guessing there’s gonna be a big thing to happen that’s gonna end it all. Like, someone’s gonna die, I’m just gonna say it, it’s gotta happen?
- Also, because I can’t restrain myself, I have been on Tumblr and Twitter today, and I haven’t actively stopped to read what I’ve seen, but because I am rubbish at avoiding it, I have figured out that we’ve got some flashbacks this episode, which appear to have Fitz in them??? I bloody hope so gosh.
- Right, I’m gonna start it. Deep breaths.
- Recap, okay.
- RIP Jiaying.
- Deke is so oblivious but I still love him and wish that Daisy and Deke had been a thing.
- Daisy’s been crying nooo
- So they lost the Zephyr. (And what’s left of the Fitzsimmons fam)
- They went to space??
- Daisy’s gonna fight this bitch. (I know I’ve seen it already in clips but still).
- I’m discovering it’s really hard to type and pay attention.
- “I wanna be an agent of SHIELD” 1. I mean, that’s the show but 2. She says with the face of “but like actually don’t trust me look at my evil grin mwhahahaha”
- Space woowww
- How do all these randos know how to fly the Zephyr??
- Did Deke just make a Die Hard reference? (rhetorical, yes he did); I mean I haven’t seen the entirety of Die Hard, but I watched bits last Christmas and I’ve also watched enough B99.
- …Motherfucker. (again actually something I learned from B99, not Die Hard)
- Aw Mackelena babysitting
- Proof?
- Oh so the team’s finally learning what we learned about time in Endgame.
- “A Brand New Day” got it
- Bro I was gonna say that (about it’s basically Project Insight) but he said it better cos he’s Coulson and he’s cooler.
- “My sister” look at these two
- Ha lies I bet she’s fucking lying
- “Sibyl said” the new version of Simon Says
- Hold up did she just give her the keys?
- DON’T MAKE ME WATCH THIS AGAIN
- IT’S A FITZSIMMONS BEST BITS
- And I’m going to cry
- DON’T hit my BABY
- Elizabeth’s eyebrows are to die for
- WHAT DID THEY DO TO DEKE NO
- Where’s she going huh
- Look Sousa put suspenders on
- Are they his battle suspenders
- Cos that’s the cutest thing ever
- I love him
- “I ALREADY HAVE A SISTER TO SAVE HER NAME IS JEMMA SIMMONS” OMG
- Science Daisy
- So she’s really never flown a quinjet huh
- “It’s your last chance to stay behind” *assertively puts on seatbelt”
- That moment when you don’t know if it’s a cut to the next scene or Mack’s caught them
- No wait he’s got his shotgun axe. Bitch ready to go yes.
- Oh wait he’s telling her off.
- No he’s agreeing.
- Omg yes Mack
- Where does all that water go – I’m assuming there’s a drainage system?
- So they left Mum and Dad behind rip
- Is Kora just in the background reading a book.
- Protective Nana Jemma
- Nate you never cared about ‘your old man’.
- Sousa just leaves his seat
It’s a nice parallel to Goose in Captain Marvel
- They have an auto-grav setting? But like, the quinjet isn’t made for space.
- Daisy, ever the optimistic.
- Mmmmmmspace
- Oooof pulling the Bahrain card.
- If May hadn’t done it, she wouldn’t have had a cool backstory, so put that in your pipe and smoke it Kora
- Mmmmmcreepy messages through a virus in 1980s aesthetic. What a…. well… aesthetic.
- Sassy Coulson back at it again.
- I mean you are a fucking robot can’t you just plug yourself in or some shit; I’M NOT VERY SCIENCY OKAY
- Oh great another “last mission” convo
- Sounds like you will.
- Thanks I’m crying
- Oh wait he doesn’t remember the kiss I forgot that, shit.
- Can’t just break a fucking window Nate, you’re gonna have to pay for that. Like literally with your own money, please and thanks, I don’t think the team brought any money with them.
- Ooh love a good Coulson talk.
- Honestly where would the team be without May? Dead, I think.
- Burnt toast.
- Did she just say Grant Ward.
- Yes she did.
- Ward would have been worse without Garrett? Uh I think not, not if someone had just called Child Services, and gotten him some fucking therapy.
- “What are your intentions with Daisy?” Dad Mack coming through, “no funny business” and all that.
- “I don’t have any intentions.” WHAT A LIE DANIEL HAHAHAHAHA YOU CRADLED HER HEAD ON YOUR LAP WHEN SHE WAS INJURED, YOU CARRIED HER BRIDAL STYLE OUT OF THAT BARN, YOU WERE GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO LEAVE THIS WHOLE MESS, BUT LOOKED RIGHT AT A SLEEPING, RECOVERING DAISY AND SAID “IM RIGHT WHERE I NEED TO BE”, YOU SAT AND NAPPED IN A CHAIR BY HER BEDSIDE THE ENTIRE TIME, YOU DIDN’T SAY NO WHEN SHE KISSED YOU, SO EXCUSE ME MISTER “NO INTENTIONS” BUT I THINK YOU MIGHT BE WRONG
- “Well then you better get some” omg we stan mack even though his voice is so deep I often miss what he says
- “omg shes like so into you gurl” is basically what I just heard. (picture 2000s american teenage girl, phone pressed to ear, chewing gum really loudly etc.)
- “sir” HES SO POLITE
- I’m loving this chat and its so true, every single one of them would massacre Sousa if he hurt Daisy.
- “just like a damn comic book” ahaha haha…. ha. yep.
- But I do love a good comic book joke in the show.
- Wasn’t it in like s4, and Coulson said something about Daisy being Director and she was like “ha yeah maybe in the comic book version”? idk man im rewatching SHIELD because I have the worst memory but that was funny too
- These two’s eyebrows in this scene god.
- Honestly if you get the chance to rewatch this scene just watch Mack and Sousa’s eyebrows as they turn to look at each other it’s adorable.
- Alright Sousa no need to be so mean I think it’s a great name.
- These two giggling together omg the one things I didn’t know I needed.
- 19th century definitely was.
- FINALLY SOME NEW FITZ AT LAST
- “can you give us a moment” “yes” “…..oh”
- What are you suggesting fitz my darling
- …sooooooooooo….
- Some time to have a kid maybe.. idk… grow old together…
- What bloodwork? Did I miss a thing?
- Snuggling Fitzsimmons ahhhhh
- I didn’t think Kora would be so sad omg. Now I feel bad for her shit it wasn’t meant to be this way, I-
- Fitz looks so different omg
- Omg Fitz grabbing onto her and hugging im soft omg what a beautiful trope
- WHO’S FITZ WTF OMG NO FUCK SHIT CRAP AHHHHHHHH
- A kickass fight scene nice
- Uh oh
- Nice one May
- “Sunshine” what an asshole
- They’re gonna decimate everything wtf
- Wasn’t there all those ships in the trailer
- “quake”
- Look at these cuties
- Thanos could turn you to dust too.
- SORRY too soon
- Uhhhhhhhhhh what the fuck is happening
- They’re just wiping out shield
- Rip the Triskelion
- DON’T YOU TOUCH HER LIKE THAT oh look now I’m being protective wtf is happening to me
- Urgh absolutely disgusting
- Well shit
Uhhhhhhh so this is problematic. I mean, by all accounts, they could just leave this timeline and go back to the OG one. I mean, there’s a canon timeline where Steve learns early that Bucky is alive, Loki has the Tesseract and Steve just told a elevator full of Hydra agents “Hail Hydra” (so a highly chaotic timeline, that the avengers just left) so they could just leave but like, that’s unethical, i guess???? Oh well.
Let’s go have a look at the new trailer for the FINALE!! ARGH omg its all ending and I’m sad
WELL im going to cry aren’t I? ffs
Daisy’s accepting that this is their last mission.
“This is what we were fighting for.” Which issss….?
It really is the end, huh.
The finale will make me cry. There’s not many SHIELD episodes that have made me do that. I think the one that made me cry the most was the spy’s goodbye. And I seem to remember crying when Fitzsimmons were at the bottom of the ocean, and then laughing through my sobs bc the shot of Fury coming down from the helicopter, arm outstretched like Jesus was the most hilarious thing I had ever seen; but other than that? Not many.
I’m excited and terrified at the same time. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF. HELP.
#agents of shield#aos#Phil Coulson#melinda may#Daisy Johnson#Mack#yo yo rodriguez#jemma simmons#leo fitz#fitzsimmons#marvel#MCU#tv#finale#The Final Mission#help
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Hurts to be Human: Chapter 1
Here’s the link to the: Prologue
Shout out to @songforhema for helping me out XD
Summary: Bucky and you had struggled for a while, maintaining a less than healthy relationship before finally deciding that maybe simply wanting someone isn’t enough anymore. So what happens when time passes, people change, but feelings never leave? (Bucky and Reader eventually get back together!)
Warnings: Cussing, references to a negative past, fluff
Also! I’m going to be doing my best to post gifs that have something to do with a particular moment in the chapter. So yeah, have fun!
Chapter One — Time Heals All Wounds? I Call Bullshit.
“Hey, Y/N, when you’re done with that table, you can go home.”
She looked up, a relieved smile appearing. It made the corners of her eyes crinkle sweetly. Normally Y/N was the last person to leave, locking up and putting everything away because he trusted her to not break anything. However, there was one day once a month where he let her leave early so she could get a goodnight’s rest for her morning session. It was a relief, in all honesty, having someone like a boss who understood that mental health was just as important as her job. And Michael? He was like that dorky dad kids would normally get embarrassed by, trying to keep up with the times and tell “relevant” jokes. Still, she found herself staring at his appearance, struggling to get used to his shaved head and glasses. It was a recent change and after knowing him as the guy with the silver ponytail and goatee, she wasn’t sure how she felt about it. “Thanks, Mikey!”
“Don’t call me that.”
Y/N laughed before turning her attention back to her customers, she offered that warm smile and Southern charm that she’d learned and developed over her years in this town. It provided better tips for her and usually, the customers were friendly, so it came almost naturally to her. Any assholes normally got the boot from the big guy. “So what can I get for you guys?”
Click!
The sound of her key turning in the lock signaled her arrival back to the apartment. Four years and even after all this time she still couldn’t bring herself to call the place home. It didn’t feel right. Kicking the door shut behind her, she didn’t bother turning on the lights, instead simply relying on the moonlight streaming through the window. “H.D.,” you called, dropping your bag on the kitchen counter. “Here, kitty, time for dinner.” The little runt of a kitten was something she’d found in the apartment when she’d first moved there. Its two faces, one half pitch black and the other a vibrant orange, reminded her of her favorite comic villain — Harvey Dent. Why she named the cat after a villain, she wasn’t entirely sure, but it stuck. H.D. stuck with her, never warming up to any guests that came by. She was a ferocious little beast. Setting her bowl on the counter, Y/N filled it with wet food and set it on the counter, confused as to why the cat hadn’t made an appearance yet.
“Don’t you think this middle-of-nowhere town is a bit of a step down from New York?”
Immediately Y/N reached into the drawer next to her, grabbing her gun and aiming at where the voice had come from. Across the bar, hiding in the living room’s shadows on a recliner was none other than Nick Fury. In his hands was a content H.D. purring as if there was no tomorrow. A knowing smirk was on Fury’s features as H.D. looked up. A small meow escaped the feline as if she was trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together.
“I see you haven’t lost your touch, Agent Y/L/N.”
Y/N knew Fury wasn’t a threat. She knew he wouldn’t be here unless there was a reason. However, even knowing that, she didn’t lower the gun. She had walked away from his neck of the woods years ago and had no intention of going back. “You always hide out in women’s apartments?” Raising an eyebrow, she watched as H.D. hopped out of Fury’s arms and crossed the room, her target being the food that Y/N had laid out for her.
He chuckled, shaking his head. “No, not really. How are you, Y/L/N?”
“I was doing just fine until about two minutes ago.” They studied one another, calculating each possible move that could be made in the next few moments. When she didn’t see him reach for a weapon, didn’t see him make a call for help, she lowered the gun. “What are you even doing here, Fury?”
“I’ve had Maria keep tabs on you.”
“Of course you have.” There was no surprise there. Fury liked having an eye on the whole deck of cards. Whether she had quit or not, she had the training and know-how to be a potential threat. Still, it unnerved her to know that he had gone so far as to pay a personal visit.
“How’s therapy?”
Through gritted teeth, “Fine.”
“Nightmares?”
Fist clenched, “I have coping mechanisms.”
“Healthy ones?” He took her silence as a yes. “Your anxiety attacks?”
Shoulders tensed. “Maintained.”
“Suicidal thoughts?”
The air grew tense. Why was he skirting around his reasons for being here? Why was he talking to her as if they’d been friends all this time? “What is this about?”
Fury studied her. “You seem healthier.” He had to make sure it was true, that Maria wasn’t feeding him false information by accident.
“Guess the country does wonders for the brain.”
He laughed. “I call bullshit on that. You’re a city girl, Y/N. Always have been.”
“People change.”
“No. They don’t.” Oh, she wanted to punch him. But maybe it was right. Maybe this was why she couldn't convince herself even after all this time that this wasn't home. “They get better, sure. Healthier, stronger, or the opposite, but that sort of thing? Not so much.”
“Is this some fucked up doctor’s visit?”
“Not at all. I have a mission for you.” He made it sound so simple, so matter of fact. That was Fury though. She shouldn’t be surprised.
Her mind drifted to the team, the Avengers. They had been her family for almost three years. Then… She shook her head, not wanting to think about that one particular guy. Every time, her heart sped up in a way that made her wish she never left. “I don’t do that anymore.”
“Maybe not, but you still got it.” He was hiding something. She could tell. “They need you.”
“No, they don’t.”
“Y/N,” he muttered, rolling his eye. Fury took a seat and leaned back, crossing his right leg over his left knee. She knew that move, that lean. This wasn’t just a boss coming to give orders, but a friend asking for help. “They have faced Loki, Ultron, Hydra, each other, and Thanos twice…Each time they barely made it and that’s a little unsettling for a man like me. Over those years people have come and gone and you are one of them. However, the reason you left wasn’t that you weren’t cut out for the superhero gig.”
“I wasn’t —“
He kept talking as if she hadn’t interrupted. “It was because you needed to take care of yourself. And that’s fine, I understand and can certainly respect it. I don’t know many people that would have taken the steps you did. Hell, Stark didn’t.”
“He tried.”
“He couldn’t,” Fury corrected. “But all that being said, the Avengers have been a fractured bunch for a while. Wanda and Vision are doing their own thing. Banner is enjoying retirement on a beach somewhere.” She chuckled, appreciating that Bruce took that chance. “Thor and Danvers are off-world and don’t need to be around for everything.” His voice trailed off, showing he was running out of options.”
“T’Challa?”
“Is there if we call, but he’s a bit busy running a kingdom. I’d rather not call him in if I can help it. As for his sister, she visits frequently to help with new tech.”
“Strange?”
“I dealt with Stark’s attitude for years. I’d rather not do the same with him.”
“Okay,” she muttered, setting the gun on the counter and shoving her hands in her back pockets. “There’s still more, Fury. Peter? Scott?”
“Both are Avengers, but Parker’s a minor. He’s not around as much as he could be in the future. Scott works with what he can, helps often, but the man does have a daughter.”
“Same with Clint,” which meant he wasn’t an option either. “Sharon?”
“Recruited already.”
“Then why do you need me?”
Fury watched her curiously, knowing she was running out of people to list off. He’d never force Y/N to come back to the Avengers. She’d fought her skeletons for years just to get to this point. She was happy, whole without having to use anyone as a crutch. He wouldn’t allow himself to take that away from her when he’d known her almost as long as he’d known agents like Hill, Barton, and Romanov. He’d already lost one of those agents, but Fury wouldn’t let himself lose any more. Not if he could help it. But watching her, he could tell she was itching to come back. Her instincts weren’t all that rusty. All she needed was a chance to get back in. So now was time for the pitch. “Your guys are struggling.” She flicked as he referred to them as hers, looking away and running her fingers through H.D.’s fur. “It seems the government is making another attempt to rid the world of Wilson’s role”
“He isn’t Captain America. Hell, he’s insisted he isn’t.”
“Dons the shield, gets the name. That’s how everyone’s looking at it at least.”
“Get Sharon and Peggy to take care of it.”
“I would, but” he trailed off, earning more of her attention. That could only mean one thing.
“What did Bucky do?”
Disbelief rang clear in his voice as he asked, “Do you not watch tv?”
“Nope. It isn’t recommended to me. You know, all things considered.”
He could understand that. It seemed every channel was talking about the next awful thing or the latest bombing or some form of violence. She didn’t need to have something that filled her brain with 24/7 negativity that she would feel responsible for. “Barnes hasn’t done anything yet. He’s been doing a lot better.” Fury noticed how she smiled but chose not to say anything. For now. “That being said, we have people like that Quentin Beck guy coming out and tarnishing the Avengers name.”
“And since Bucky has his history, all eyes are on him?”
“You know how he handles the pressure.”
“Still don’t see how does this include me.”
“You’re the face everyone associates with Bucky’s first glimpse of growth. Every press junket, every interview, you were there. It became this whole thing where one of you was always associated with the other. You keep, not only Barnes but also Wilson in check. That is something we desperately need right now.” He sighed softly. Here goes nothing. “We think there’s another guy like Quentin lurking around, biding his time till one of these guys makes a mess we can’t cover-up. Then —“
“The hero ‘Captain America’ gets forced into retirement and out comes a new ‘hero.’”
Fury nodded, glad that he was talking to someone who fully understood his concerns. “Exactly.” Sharon had argued with him when Fury had mentioned bringing Y/N into this, thinking it might be worse for her and the soldier back in New York. Watching Y/N now, he could feel in his gut that he was making the right call. “There have been calls, videos, photos — you name it and the press has had it. Their reputations are getting tarnished, but this isn’t exactly something that requires all the heroes on my contact list.”
Wry smile in place, she shook her head as she asked, “Just a stubborn former Avenger and agent?”
Fury grinned. There she was. “How’s it sound? Got a deal?”
——
The Avengers Compound felt emptier now that heroes seemed to come and go as if the exit was a revolving door. It was irritating, but something these two men could understand. They continued on their morning run, Bucky easily passing up Sam over and over again. It was getting to the point where Bucky would say, “On your right.”
After hearing it for the fifth time, Sam shouted, “Cut it out, old man!”
“Old man?” Bucky laughed, the belly laugh bursting through him as he grinned from ear to ear. “If that’s the case, why can’t you keep up, Birdbrain?”
Sam growled, fighting every fiber in his being to send Redwing after him. That’d give the soldier a workout, he was certain. “I swear to god, Sharon is going to have to keep me from kickin’ your ass.”
“Gotta catch it first!”
Bucky took off, feeling the burning hole in the back of his head that came from Sam’s intense glare. Yeah, Sam would find some sort of way to get payback, but for now? It was just entertaining as Hell. “Hey,” Sam shouted after him, slowing down when he felt his phone buzz in his back pocket. Answering it, he was confused as to why Sharon was calling him. She knew he’d be on his run. “What’s up, Carter?” He looked at Bucky’s back as the man continued running, a frown appearing as he heard what the woman had to say. “And no one thought that was information we needed to know?” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Okay, I’ll let him know.”
Hanging up, he saw the jet slowly approaching and tried shouting after the idiot in front of him with a loud, “Hey, Buck!”
Bucky looked up when he heard Sam, brow furrowing when he saw the jet ahead. He slowed down as it landed nearby, both men shielding their faces as the autumn leaves were sent flying through the air. He was confused, knowing that Sharon normally let them know about these sorts of things. What Avenger was paying a visit? As the jet-powered down, he looked at Sam and asked, “You know anything about this?”
“Only about ten seconds ago,” Sam grumbled, irritated not at Bucky, but rather at being left in the dark. He looked over his shoulder as Sharon came outside. It was clear she was trying to keep her face void of emotion, but he knew her. She was just as concerned for the man standing next to him as he was. “Maybe you should head inside, Buck. Sharon and I got this.”
Bucky rolled his eyes, turning away from the jet to focus instead on his friend. He knew Sam was concerned and there was cause for it. It had taken a while for Bucky to make progress in therapy and took an even longer time to get him to this level of ease. Assuring him, Bucky explained, “Sam, I’m not nearly as much of an ass as I used to be. I can handle greeting an Avenger.”
“That’s good to hear.”
Sam winced as Bucky looked back, the sound of Fury’s voice catching him off guard. However, that feeling was nothing compared to when he saw who was standing just behind the spy. He felt his stomach churn as if a bunch of butterflies took off simultaneously. His heart twisted, beating so loudly that he could hear it in his ears. Fingers fidgeting, he clenched them into fists as he took a shaky breath and tried to keep himself from running. Towards where his gaze was fixated on or in the opposite direction, he wasn’t sure. But either way, there she was, walking straight towards him.
Y/N.
On top of her head was a pair of sunglasses, her hair cut in a style he had never seen her try before. Where she had developed an eating disorder during their last months together, she looked healthy now. She was practically glowing, that sparkle in her eyes back where it belonged. Time worked in her favor and suddenly he found himself feeling extremely self-conscious.
“Hey there, Y/N/N,” Sam teased, unable to keep himself from smiling when he saw her. While he didn’t appreciate this being thrown at them out of the left-field, he would be one of the first to admit that he missed having Y/N fighting alongside them.
“Hey, Sammy.” She grinned and Bucky felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. That smile made the whole world seem brighter, better. A part of him, a big part of him, wished she’d smile at him like that. Her gaze shifted to him, bright smile dimming, but still just as sweet.
Fidgeting from one foot to the other.
Biting the corner of her lip.
Fiddling with the strap of the duffel hanging off her shoulder.
He knew her tells. She was nervous.
“Hey, Y/N.” He smiled and noticed how her shoulders almost immediately relaxed.
“Hey, Buck.” There was a moment of silence before she pointed to his head. “You cut your hair.”
He felt his cheeks burning, clearing his throat as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Uh…yeah, I did.”
“It looks good.”
Sam looked from one to the other. If he could raise his eyebrow any more, it would be on top of his head. These two… Looking at Y/N, he gestured to the cage in her left hand. “What’s that?”
“Oh!” She looked down at the cage and that smile of hers came back. “This is H.D.”
“A cat?” The boys asked the question at the same time, equally confused. When Y/N was part of their team, she didn’t want an animal. She thought they were too dependent on people, too needy. Now, not only did she have an animal, but she was carrying it with her like it was family.
Bucky was curious. He had to ask, “What made you get a cat?”
“It’s — Um, it’s kinda a long story.”
She readjusted her bag and Fury said, “You two can catch up with her later. Sharon?” The boys looked behind them, not realizing that Sharon had made her way to stand only a couple feet behind them. “Can you take Y/L/N to her room?”
“Yeah, of course. Come on, Y/N.”
“See you later, boys.” She walked between them, her shoulder bumping Bucky’s. It seemed the touch was registered not only by him but also by Y/N. He noticed how she quickened her steps, determined to create as much distance between them as possible.
Bucky couldn’t take his eyes off her. The way she walked was similar to the girl he’d first met. Each step was filled with that same confidence, but there seemed to be something else, something more. He just didn’t understand it. Scratching the back of his neck, he couldn’t help but grumble to himself, “I thought the time was supposed to heal all wounds.”
Sam watched him, that all-knowing smirk resting almost lazily on his lips as he glanced from Bucky to Y/N and back again. Shaking his head, he knew this was going to be a lot of trouble. Part of him was hopeful, wanting the two to find a way to grow and work things out. The other? The other was more realistic, knowing the odds weren’t exactly in anyone’s favor. Watching Bucky out of his peripheral vision, he told him, “Yeah, I’m calling bullshit on that.”
Chapter Two - Can We Pretend
#bucky x you#bucky barnes#bucky#bucky imagine#bucky fluff#y/n#bucky x female reader#bucky x y/n#bucky x reader#james buchanan barnes#seb#sebastian#sebastian stan#imagine#bucky barnes fluff#fluff#reader#avengers#marvel#marvel mcu#post endgame#sam wilson#sharon carter#nick fury#friends#ex lovers
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Family Therapy Gone Wrong
Prompt: Thor, Loki, and Hela go to family therapy
A/N: Hope y'all like it!
@genderfluid-loki-and-trans-peter
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"So. Tell me what's been going on."
"A mortal like you could never understand," Loki snapped. Hela glanced at her little brother with a hint of approval.
Thor had insisted they all come to what he called "family therapy". Loki thought it was stupid. They would never be a perfect little family. He doubted their issues could ever be resolved, especially not by a Midgardian.
Hela had shared Loki's concerns, though she made it clear that though she agreed with him, that did not mean she liked him.
However, in the end Thor had managed to drag his two siblings along to family therapy. Loki just hoped it would be over soon. He already couldn't stand it.
Thor glared at him. "Loki, mind your tongue." He turned back to the therapist, not seeing Loki mocking him.
"Well, my lady, we have seen quite our share of trials. My sister here-" Thor gestures to Hela- "had been banished by my father to another realm for quite some time. Loki and I have only recently met her, and this was a few minutes after our father's death."
Loki yawned as Thor went on to describe what had gone on the past few months. He studied his nails as Thor described Ragnarok, Thanos, and then Hela showing up with Loki to defeat the mad titan.
Loki glanced at Hela, who had also taken to studying her nails. It unnerved the young prince at how similar he was to his sister. Both had long black hair. Both liked the color green. Both had a helm of horns. And both were out of favor with their dead father.
Thor finally fell silent. Loki studied the therapist, surprised to find her calm and collected. Truly either this Midgardian was either very good at hiding emotions or had experienced something like this before.
The woman adjusted her glasses. "Well that's quite the story you have. How have you each felt about these events?"
Loki rolled his eyes. Like he was going to open up to this mortal!
Thor, unsurprisingly, went first. He described his grief, anger, pain and frustration. Loki bit his lip, holding back his insults. Thor knew nothing of pain. Pain was sweet compared to the agony he had felt throughout the past few years.
Surprisingly, Hela hesitantly opened up a little. She expressed her resentment at being locked away, and the smug satisfaction she felt when Thanos was defeated.
Everyone looked to Loki. Obviously he was expected to open up next. But this prince was not going to give anything to this therapist or his siblings. Better to hide one's emotions. That way you don't get hurt further.
The therapist smiled sadly. "My dear, it is understandable to want to hide one's emotions. But keeping them locked up will do more harm than good. Trust me, I know."
Loki looked up. How could she possibly know anything? He studied her intently. She almost seemed to...open her mind to him. So he accepted the invitation and looked within.
Loki's eyes widened as he exited the mortal's mind. This therapist, named Emily, had been through much. However, her battle had never been physical. She had battled with something called Depression, a mental illness that, now that Loki knew what it was, he realized he might have it too. She had nearly killed herself, but her brother had stopped her and got her some professional help. From then on she dedicated herself to helping others struggling with mental illnesses.
Much of Emily's plight reminded Loki of himself. He, too, had tried to kill himself, that fateful day on the Bifrost. He had never expected to survive. It was his unfortunate luck that had allowed Thanos to capture and torture him.
Loki sighed and decided to share. Perhaps it would be good to get it off his chest.
Besides, he could always at least wipe Emily's memory.
"My troubles began before Odin's death," Loki began. "They began the moment I was taken from my birthplace, Jotunheim.
"I was raised by Odin, but I always felt left out. I always felt different. I was often ridiculed and mocked, and my own brother, Thor, would often ignore me, as if he thought me beneath him."
Thor started to interrupt but Emily shushed him. "It's Loki's turn," she scolded.
Loki nodded his thanks and continued. "Then, after Thor had been banished to Midgard some years ago, my true heritage was revealed to me. I was the son of Laufey and heir to the throne of Jotunheim.
"Suddenly, everything made sense. I had never felt like I belonged because I didn't. I was a stolen relic, a monster, an enemy to Asgard.
"And then the All-Father descended into the Odinsleep. And I was suddenly king of Asgard, the throne thrust into my hands when I was still reeling from my earlier discovery.
"I decided to tell Thor that Odin had passed. Why? Perhaps I was getting back at him for neglecting me all those years. Perhaps I was just causing some mischief, the one thing that still made sense to me.
"He believed me. I then turned my thoughts back to my recent revelation. Mother, of course, tried to help me, but there was only so much she could do. She didn't understand. Ultimately, I was alone.
"I knew Thor couldn't come back, however. The All-Father had not yet awakened, and thus I couldn't know if he were allowed back yet. Besides that, I knew that if he returned that I would once again become his inferior, perhaps even more so now.
"So I sent the Destroyer after him, hoping it would stop him from coming back. Unfortunately, it sought to kill, which was something I did not want. Thor came back to Asgard angry, and rightly so.
"However I couldn't admit I had made a mistake. Thus we began our first true fight against each other.
"Odin awakened, and dismissed me. I told him I would've done anything for him. He rejected me. Thus, I let go of Thor and let myself tumble off the Bifrost, hoping I would meet a swift end.
"However, Thanos found me and rescued me. He tortured me for a whole year until I swore to do his bidding. If I didn't, then he would make me long for something as sweet as pain.
"So I went to Midgard, pretending I had went there of my own bidding. I was there to collect the Tesseract, also known as the space infinity stone. I was given the mind stone to help me in my endeavors.
"I then decided that I would purposefully fail so that Thanos could not win. Thor took me back to Asgard. Odin, that merciful being, sentenced me to solitary confinement in prison instead of killing me. And I would never again be allowed to see mother.
"I felt angry and hurt. Mother was the one person who had always had sympathy for me. And now I would never again see her. What was worse was that later on, I instructed the svartalfs on which stairs to take. They proceeded to kill mother. I still haven't forgiven myself.
"Thor then asked my help with his Midgardian girlfriend, Jane, who was possessed by the reality infinity stone. I helped, and sacrificed myself in so doing."
Loki glanced at Thor. "Perhaps if you would've asked me how I survived, I would've been able to tell you that I didn't know. That I truly thought I was going to die. But you never did. You assumed I merely faked my death.
"After that, I sent Odin to Midgard and took his place. He was not fit to rule. I knew one who was, however. Thor.
"As Odin, I offered him the throne. He declined in favor of further maturing.
"Thus, the responsibility was once again on my shoulders. I did not want it, but I learned to enjoy it. I was a much better king than Odin. Asgard prospered under my rule, and our people were significantly happier than in past years.
"Thor discovered me and thought I had been playing him a fool. I was not. I knew that if I revealed myself that I would be sent back to prison. And I didn't want that.
"Thor and I then witnessed Odin's death. Soon after, Hela showed up. Thor and I crash landed on Sakaar.
"I visited Thor in his prison. I tried to express my feelings to him then, but he wouldn't listen. He never listens.
"I helped Thor out of prison, but I knew Hela to be too powerful for us. Besides, I was afraid to go back to Asgard. So many bad memories existed there. And despite my frustration with Thor, I did not want him dead.
"So I tried to trick him so he would not die and I would remain emotionally intact. And perhaps I was also paying him back for being so hurtful with his words and actions.
"However, Thor stopped me. Electrocuted me and left me there on the ground. I was in agony. I hadn't been in such pain since I had felt the svartalf's blade pierce my chest.
"However, I had endured worse at Thanos' hands, so I could not be taken into blissful unconsciousness.
"A rock person eventually helped me. And though Thor had tortured me, like so many others, I went to help him save Asgard.
"To do that, I had to release Surtur. Unfortunately, there wasn't time to get out without dying. However I spotted the Tesseract. That was the key to my escaping with my life.
"The rest of Asgard escaped while Surtur and Hela battled. Surtur of course won, and Hela died. But of course she came back. You can't keep the goddess of death dead for long.
"Then Thanos attacked our ship. He'd killed half our people. The Valkyrie led the rest to safety. He also then killed me.
"Or so he'd thought.
"Instead he had merely caused me agony. I had to make the bloodshot eyes and pale visage an illusion so that he would think me dead. It worked.
"I then went for help to the only one I knew who could. My sister.
"And ultimately we saved the universe."
The therapist finally seemed surprised. And she was not alone. Both Thor and Hela seemed at a loss for words. Loki could hear their thoughts:
"He went through all that?"
"Those were his intentions?"
"He has been through more heartache than any I have ever encountered."
Loki scowled. "Stop."
"Stop what?" Emily asked.
"I can hear all your thoughts. I don't need your pity. I thought we were here to work out family issues."
Emily paused, a bit unsettled, before continuing. "Loki, you are a part of your family. Your issues are also your family's issues, because no one should go through life alone."
"Tell that to Odin," Loki muttered. Hela snorted.
Emily sighed. "Well, I'm afraid our time slot is up. We'll work more on this next Thursday."
Loki stood, dusted himself off, and quickly left the room. Thor protested, but Loki kept moving. He left the building and ran into a deserted alley.
Finally, he slumped to the ground, and for the first time in years, he let himself cry.
#queued post#family therapy gone wrong#loki#thor#hela#loki fanfic#loki fanfiction#thor fanfic#thor fanfiction#hela fanfic#hela fanfiction#odin family#loki thor hela#fanfic#fanfiction
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Avengers 4 Title Predictions (In Order of Likelihood.)
1. Avengers: The Snappening
2. Avengers: After the Snappening
3. Avengers: Damn You Star-Munch!
4. Avengers: Star-Munch is Definitely Getting Star-Punched
5. Avengers: The Time Star-Munch Got Star-Punched
6 Avengers: Ashes to Ashes
7. Avengers: Dust to Dust
8. Avengers: Age of Thanos
9. Avengers: Damn You Marvel!
10. Avengers: Damn You Russos!
11. Avengers: Damn You Kevin Feige!
12. Avengers: Why You Kill Our Favorites?
13. Avengers: Time Machine
14. Avengers: Sacrifice
15. Avengers: Thanos Discovers Farmville
16. Avengers: Farmville Level: Thanos
17. Avengers: Thanos Obtains the Farmville High Score
18 Avengers: That is, Until Groot Beats His High Score
19. Avengers: The Departed
20. Avengers: Motherfu-!
21. Avengers: Soul World
22. Avengers: Emotional Trauma
23. Avengers: The End
24. Avengers: All Our Friends Are Dead!
25. Avengers: The Cleanup
26. Avengers: Rest in Peace
27. Avengers: Rocket Gets Bucky’s Arm
28. Avengers: Why, Marvel, Why?
29. Avengers: Marvel, Unfuck This Mess!
30. Avengers: Tony Stark and the No Good, VERY BAD Day
31. Avengers: The Rise of Loki’s Army
32. Avengers: The Fandom Will Have Their Revenge!
33. Avengers: Wakanda Forever!
34. Avengers: The Return of Hawkeye
35. Avengers: The Dusting
36. Avengers: Why Did You Kill Galaga Guy?
37. Avengers: Now Groot Will Have to Obtain Galaga Guy’s High Score
38. Avengers: Oh, Wait...
39. Avengers: You Killed Groot Too...
40. Avengers: Damn You James Gunn!
41. Avengers: Why Did You Let Groot Die a SECOND TIME?!?!
42. Avengers: His Last Word Was “Dad”
43. Avengers: And Rocket Had to Watch Groot Die in Front of Him AGAIN!
44. Avengers: Why Can’t Rocket be Happy?
45. Avengers: First Groot, Then Yon- I Mean Mary Poppins, Now Groot AGAIN?!?!
46. Avengers: Marvel Better Pay For All of Our Therapy
47. Avengers: Goodbye Everyone, I’ll Remember You All in Therapy!
48. Avengers: The Russos Are Evil, Evil I Say!
49. Avengers: Why????
50. Avengers: Thanos Takes Manhattan
51. Avengers: Hot Tub Time Machine
52. Avengers: No Happy Ending
53. Avengers: I Don’t Wanna Go...
54. Avengers: Another One Bites the Dust
55. Avengers: And Another One Gone, Another One Gone...
56. Avengers: The Return of the Invisible Man
57. Avengers: What the ACTUAL FUCK, Marvel?
58. Avengers: The Trip to Ben & Jerry’s
59. Avengers: The Adventures of the Pirate Angel Baby and Sweet Rabbit
60. Avengers: HULK SMASH!
61. Avengers: Thanos Obtains the Kidney Stone
62. Avengers: Mah Heart, Marvel! MAH HEART!
63. Avengers: I Don’t Feel So Good, Mr. Stark
64. Avengers: Well, We Won’t Have to Worry About Tom Spoiling Avengers 4...
65. Avengers: That’s Because You Killed Him, Marvel!
66. Avengers: But Then There’s Mark Ruffalo...
67. Avengers: Star-Munch Should’ve Let Rocket Build Another Death Button.
68. Avengers: 12% of a Plan
69. Avengers: Electric Boogaloo
70. Avengers: Shawarma Paradise
71. Avengers: The Sun Will Shine on Us Again
72. Avengers: Part of a Plan
73. Avengers: Sweet Rabbit
74. Avengers: Where is Gamora?
75. Avengers: Who is Gamora?
76. Avengers: Why is Gamora?
77. Avengers: Thanos Blows Some Bubbles
78. Avengers: Everyone Dies
79. Avengers: Even the Audience
80. Avengers: Especially the Audience
81. Avengers: Russo Bros. Got Some Splainin’ To Do...
82. Avengers: Deadpool Might Show Up!
83. Avengers: Joss Whedon Will Save Us!
84. Avengers: If Not Joss Whedon, Fanfic Writers!
85. Avengers: Nah, Dawg, Stan Lee Will Save Us!
86. Avengers: Star Munch Gets a Geography Lesson About Earth.
87. Avengers: Tony and Steve Kiss and Make Up.
88. Avengers: People That You Forgot About Survived and Are Relevant Again!
89. Avengers: Marvel Owns Your Soul!
90. Avengers: Thanos Demands Your Silence.
91. Avengers: Thanos Can Kiss My Ass!
92. Avengers: The Revolution Has Begun!
93. Avengers: Everything.
94. Avengers: Kick Names, Take Ass.
95. Avengers: It Was the Only Way.
96. Avengers: Tyrion’s Revenge
97. Avengers: A Story of Existential Crisises.
98. Avengers: End Game.
#groot#rocket raccoon#teen groot#teenager groot#baby groot#gamora#starlord#rocket#avengers infinity war#avengers#infinity war#avengers 4#infinity war funny#avengers funny
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4, 6, 9, 10, 12: Rhodey and Bucky, 15, 16, 21, 23, 27, 29, 30, 32, 35, 37, 43, 46, 50, 54: Tony
You know that meme where the white woman is looking at the math overlaying the picture in confusion? That was me when I got this ask because instead of reading the fucking questions on the ask meme I put up I decided ‘Rhodey and Bucky’ were some other thing? Long story short I’m a moron lmao.
4- Favorite actress
Tbh I don’t pay much attention to the actresses and thus I almost missed out of saying Tessa Thompson like some kind of savage. I appreciate how hard she worked to try and make Valkyrie bisexual and also her character was basically the only thing I liked about Thor: Ragnarok (controversial opinion, I know).
6- Favorite quote
“Trust my rage” from Thor The Dark World. This line is so visceral and poetic. Like shit son, the rest of the movie was eh, but that line? Fucking amazing, and Hiddleston’s delivery of it is top tier bois.
9- BROTP
Pepper and Tony. I’ve never seen the romance between them, and in my opinion it was there because it seems movies are fucking incapable of not having a romance subplot (no hate to pepperony shippers either, everyone likes what they like and the entire point of fic is to circumvent canon anyways). But as a friendship pairing these two are excellent- they’re a great team, they understand each other on a fundamental level, and their friendship dynamic is interesting. Also, to me, I think their relationship is more compelling without the romance.
10- How did I discovered Marvel?
I’ve mentioned this in other asks but I had a friend make me watch Avengers and I didn’t like it lmao. I only gave it another show two years later and started from the beginning with CA:TFA and then I got into it. I’m not sure what changed or why I took to it later, especially when I found the later half of TFA to be kind of boring (I love Skinny!Steve ok) but it happened and when WS came out I saw it in theaters. From then I was hooked.
12- Make me choose between two characters: Rhodey and Bucky
Damn, I’d rather not have to choose, you suck! But, for the sake of the ask, Rhodey. As a character he’s better constructed, has his own story and motivation outside Tony, he’s funny, and while he has his moments (that I mostly blame on shit writing) he’s a great friend. I honestly wish that we could get a whole movie about him doing things but I did hear some rumors not long ago about Marvel looking into making Iron Man 4 an Ironheart movie and the only thing that would make that better is if Rhodey were her mentor (I literally wrote a story about this once).
Anyways, although I write Bucky a lot more than I do Rhodey I do prefer his character in a more fundamental way simply because he’s more fleshed out. Plus I love male friendships that are actually good and James Rhodey Rhodes is the God Tier of friends. The man spent 3 fucking months combing the desert for his disaster friend and that’s some damn dedication. Especially when you know people must have gotten real damn annoyed with him using resources and shit. But that action alone tells you everything you need to know about him and none of it is bad. I love Rhodey, seriously.
15- Top 5 ships
Tony/T’Challa
Tony/ Bucky
Tony/ Stephen
Tony/Rhodey
And, because I feel compelled to put a ship that doesn’t have Tony in it Steve/Howard
Honorable Mentions: Tony/ Peter Q
16- Top 5 villains
THANOS
Erik Killmonger
Loki
Justin Hammer (he’s just so absurd)
Ghost (from Ant Man and The Wasp)
Seriously, this was hard because Marvel’s villains are shit. They’re all the same one dimensional ‘they’re evil’ type characters.
21- Dream crossover
Basically any urban fantasy world I loved in my teens and the MCU. I’ve written a Vampire Academy/ MCU crossover but I’d love to write a House of Night crossover (I hate the characters in HoN, but love the world ok don’t judge), and a Shadowhunters crossover. I’ve seen some cool stuff with Teen Wolf being crossed over too though.
23- Most layered character
Tony fucking easily. His arcs are always the most compelling (or close to it), he���s had the most character development, and his trauma plays out so beautifully on screen. I’d argue Steve is a close second post WS, but the MCU will never let his character play out the development he’s gotten because they’ll never let Steve be less than perfect, which pisses me off. Otherwise his transition from a solider who wants to do right by his country to a cynical man who doesn’t know how to process the new world he’s been tossed into or how to handle a situation in which the morally correct solution isn’t abundantly obvious would be a compelling watch. But its been consistently proven that Steve will never get a real realization of his new characterization because ~~perfection~~.
27- Favorite moment
Shiiiit. That’s a lot of material and because I have a bad memory I’m going to go with ‘don’t call us plucky, we don’t know what it means’ because that was hilarious lmao.
29- Saddest moment
Shit boi, probs a toss up between Peter P’s death and Bucky’s. Peter’s is obvious but Bucky fucking dusting in front of the dude who spent so long trying to find him again in an effort to feel, even if its just for a moment, like he’s home again? Sad af. I felt awful for Steve there.
30- Most beautiful scene
Pretty much all of Black Panther is a visual treat, but I’m especially fond of T’Challa in the dream world with his father. That scene was so beautiful, and all the colors? Amazing. Only Guardians of the Galaxy even compares visually and even then Wakanda’s beauty has something else to offer that space doesn’t.
32- Actor/Actress I’d like to be cast by Marvel
As mentioned above I pay literally zero attention to actors- its a personal choice not to spend time being a voyeur into other people’s lives and treat them like commodities to consume because I loath celebrity culture (and this isn’t a slam to anyone who enjoys it, its more a slam to people who over engage in it- ie people who care enough to send death threats or paps basically). Anyways that’s an opinion you didn’t ask for, but because of that personal opinion I have no real cast choice lmao.
35- Most boring plotline?
I love Thor but all his movies. The first movie had good personal growth but eh. The second was an ok movie but forgettable (aside from my fav line from Loki in it), and unpopular opinion I hated Thor Ragarok. I mean it was funny. That’s all the good I have to say about it really. Though I have no idea why every comedy writers room is not leaping at a chance to get Taikia on their staff because the man is a comedic genius and that’s honestly being impolite to his comedy skill. Still, as much as I like Thor I didn’t really love any of his movies and all his villains were so fucking boring, even Loki wasn’t that interesting till Avengers. Poor Thor, MCU did him dirty :(
37- Most well done character death
Peter P. I give this to him over Bucky because apparently most of that scene was improv? I cried over my spider son ok. There’s someone who was in that theater with me who heard me sob out ‘my spider son’ and went home to tell people about it. That shit was heartbreaking. Second runner up goes to T’Challa but I didn’t think it was well done, I just thought it was sad as shit for Okoye and I love her so it was upsetting to see her lose her king :(
43- Characters I wish they’ve met
I don’t understand the question :( I think it’s supposed to be ‘characters you wish would met’ but all my wishes were granted in IW. Tony and Stephen met and so did Tony and Quill. I shipped Tony with both characters before they’d interacted on screen so it was nice to see :) Rhodey and Quill would be a fucking hoot together though, throw in Okoye and Valkyrie and you’ve got a bunch of drunk overpowered people telling war stories or, in Quill’s case, stories about that time he stole some shit.
46- What characters outside of the Mcu I’d like to see in a Marvel movie?
Ironheart, but I heard rumors they might do a movie with her. I think it’d be fun to have Riri in screen, especially since Peter is around her age. I’d also love to see a Young Avengers movie or a Kamala Khan/ Ms. Marvel movie though apparently there’s rumors of that too.
50- Characters that deserved better
Tony, Bucky, and Steve but all for different reasons. Steve deserves his fall from grace and not because I think he should suffer, but because keeping him on his pedestal means he’ll never be able to fully process his trauma and move on. Allow him to fall, allow him to know he isn’t perfect, then allow him to know that that’s ok, he doesn’t need to be, he just needs to do the best he can and then allow him a proper chance to move on.
Bucky because he deserves to be a character outside of Steve and, to a much smaller extent, Tony. Let the man have a movie about self actualization after trauma, let him figure out he isn’t Steve Roger’s best friend anymore (and that Steve isn’t really Steve anymore) and that that’s ok, they can both accept themselves as they exist now and still be friends. Let him develop hobbies outside of Steve, have him bond with Rhodey, he needs a good friend. Shit, let him bond with Sam too. Give me a buddy movie where Sam lowkey therapies Bucky into being a fuckin person again and Bucky finds some way to repay him. He can go beat up Scott for that time he kicked Sam’s ass lol.
And Tony because the MCU makes fuckin everything his fault, even stuff that only somewhat involves him. They drive him to an absolute breaking point and then have the characters get pissed that he broke? The only one that I found acceptable was Pepper and that’s mostly because I understand why she’d be freaked out both by Tony’s obsessive behavior and by nearly being eaten by one of his suits. She had her own shit she was dealing with post Mandarin so her I understand. Everyone else though? Mostly makes no sense. Why are you surprised that a person snaps when they’re pushed to the limit? That’s how people work lmao but that’s also because the writers make an active, and completely senseless, choice to have the characters react like Tony’s mental health problems are a choice he made and now he has to suffer because he has PTSD or some shit. Idk, but AoU was the worst for it, and, to a lesser extend IM3 but I refuse to believe Rhodey would really tell Tony to get over himself after a panic attack- the man is emotionally intelligent ok, IM3 did Rhodey dirty.
54- 5 things I love most about: Tony
Tony’s sheer level of wonder at the world around him- the look on his face in IM2 when he rediscovers that element perfectly encapsulates how he feels about learning and moving forward. (Flipside is that sometimes he has trouble staying in the present and that causes problems).
The way he tries no matter how badly he fails. Bih, if my random tests on a rock nearly ended the world I’d out and out throw myself off a cliff. Instead he accepts his part in it (and more) and chooses to try and make the best of it. He’s done that from the moment he got snatched by terrorists in Afghanistan. That in itself is basically a superpower.
His humor. I, too, hide my emotional distress under jokes so I can relate to being a lil bit of an asshole to hide how I feel. (Flipside: people don’t think he takes stuff seriously- hence Steve in the Avengers).
His mental health problems. Ok this one is weird, but I can appreciate that someone drew up a hero that isn’t based in perfection, but who tries to get there anyways. But the dude has problems, a lot of problems, and they aren’t always pretty. But they are complicated and it is compelling to watch.
The way he builds relationships. Its unconventional- Rhodey is probably the only person he’s super close to that he met in a normal way. Happy and Pepper were both people that worked for him and instead of just being their boss he took the time to learn about them and get to know them on a personal level. Obviously he ended up engaged to Pepper, but a guy who knows what his driver’s favorite show is and why he likes it is a good dude. He’d be nice to wait staff in restaurants.
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The reason that my Jane is different from canon is simply that I wanted to give her a chance. I wanted to make sure that I could justify some of the things that she did, some of the ways she acted and why. In this short- 1588- word essay I have detailed some of the problems that Jane faces mentally. Please understand that- under no certain terms- am I clinical psychiatrist and thus have no authority or knowledge of the actual mental health problems listed. This is combined from my pool of knowledge as well as a bit of research done haphazardly at 11 PM in a hot and sticky environment.
Jane suffers from a handful of different mental health problems and has for years, causing her to become very reclusive and anti-social. She prefers the company of books over humans and it took a great deal of effort on her part to willingly interact with anyone outside of her immediate friend group. She has since become a recluse again, staying at home whenever possible and disliking travel of any kind that isn't to the nearest grocery store to stock up on food. A routine has helped her break the cycle of being reclusive but only barely. Having Frigga got Jane into a routine of walking her and forcing herself to interact with society, even if she wishes she were anywhere else. Not many people actively approach Jane, seeing as she is often very closed off and unwilling to talk to people. She is greatly distressed by meeting new people and acts very cold and aggressive towards them, even if they don't deserve it.
She has been seeing a therapist and she was given a proper evaluation and assigned medication to help with a handful of her problems. The medications she takes sometimes cause more problems than they solve but she refuses to get them changed because she hasn't the time for doing that. Darcy Lewis has attempted to get her to change medications multiple times and it was only after her daughter was born that she began even considering taking her advice, though she was soon back in the US meaning that she'd have to pay frankly unreasonable prices to get them changed.
Jane suffers from anxiety and it negatively affects how she works. She prefers the company of only Darcy and Erik Selvig, as they are people she trusts to not hurt her, while she is working on important projects. Her stint at S.H.I.E.L.D was as short-lived as it was due to her rising anxiety about the place and the people in it. Often, she'll work herself to the bone in an attempt to stay awake longer. She hates sleeping and finds it to be borderline unbearable unless under the influence of her- incorrect- medication. Her friends have to force Jane into sleeping at an allotted time due to her aversion to sleep. It also contributes to her cold, harsh exterior when meeting new people. She dislikes it immensely and does everything she can to get out of that situation before it sends her into a panic attack. She also doesn't eat as much as she should, causing her to develop a mild eating disorder which has affected her life very little.
She had around 14 panic attacks while working for S.H.I.E.L.D and has had a further 5 since she and Thor broke up.
Jane also bears the weight of severe depression and has for years, since she was around 10. Bullying combined with her parents- and grandparents- dying in quick succession caused her to fall into a downward spiral that was thankfully spotted by Erik and she got treatment before things got too bad. She has been on the same anti-depressants since she was 11, which has unfortunately developed into an addiction to them. They also no longer help her and she was forced to begin a new course of stronger anti-depressants to get the effect that she should have been getting. This became an issue during college and later university when she was at her worst mentally, her first romantic relationship failed and that sunk her even further down into the darkness. She began losing interest in her research, thus losing motivation to complete certain papers and other things that would have otherwise excited her. It became so serious that her teachers got involved and sent her to a counsellor to speak about her problems, though it ultimately proved to be a waste as the counsellor was rude to Jane and dismissed her problems as lies to get out of doing schoolwork.
Her next proper relationship- Thor- was a time where she was pretty happy. She felt like her life was back on track again after the years of pain and misery she'd been through. Sadly, this happiness didn't last and she was quickly put through the wringer again when she was infected with the Aether. The power was messing with her brain and causing her severe mental distress and since she was on Asgard, she couldn't take her medication to help it. She had to suffer through everything without any help. Then, when they lost Loki, she felt like it was her fault that he'd died as he'd died protecting her. When Thor refused to speak to her, her overactive mind was telling her that it was because he blamed her for what happened with Loki rather than the more logical explanation that he was mourning the loss of his brother instead.
2 years after that, when they broke up in 2015, Jane was put through the wringer again. Her stability in the form of Thor was gone and she blamed herself for it. She beat herself up over it for months, especially once she found out that she was pregnant. Once it sunk in- around 8 months through- she began cleaning her life up so her daughter could have a stable mother instead of a wreck. What didn't help was her workaholic tendencies, where she continued doing her schoolwork even while in agony in the hospital, literally hours from birthing her daughter. Having a daughter made Jane realise that she needed to sort herself out so she could be a better mother.
Thora and Frigga- her therapy dog- made sure she had a routine that was solid enough for her to ground herself with. Jane- using her own methods- was getting better and better as time went on. Everything seemed to be looking up for her and then Thanos happened and suddenly she was dead. Being resurrected by the Hulk 5 years later and learning her daughter was missing and her dog was as well caused Jane great mental distress. She hunted high and low for her baby girl for months, eventually forcing herself to travel to where Pepper and Tony lived to find her. Jane was apprehensive about trusting Pepper but soon became a close friend of the other woman. She realised that she missed 5 years of her beloved daughter's life and it was enough to once again send her into a deep depression.
This time, there was no amount of urging from friends or family nor medication that could help her. For her own safety, Jane was placed in a mental health facility to prevent her from attempting to take her own life. She was- for the first time in years- given the proper treatment and care that she needed, was allowed supervised visits with her daughter once she'd passed a few tests and was released after almost a year inside the facility. They moved back to San Fransico as the place relaxed Jane and helped ease her anxiety. Due to her knowing everyone who she interacted with on a day-to-day basis, she was able to recover pretty well at home. She only relapsed once and that was after she used her incorrect medication by accident. Darcy personally threw that medication out the following day. Jane has days- of course- where she just stays inside and doesn't go outside. This helps prevent her from having panic attacks induced by her mind telling her that danger was around every corner.
Jane has not yet gone back to work, having taken an extended break at Darcy's insistence. She has also expressed little interest in returning to a job that stresses her out, especially since the entire Thanos incident. She'd be forced to answer questions that she doesn't have answers to and reporters would push her even if she expressed her discomfort. It is mostly why she left the work, to begin with. The publicity of her and Thor's relationship, the people's judgement of her and the reporters insistent pushing was all too much for her. Combine that with being pregnant and the fact that she was under immense pressure by her higher-ups to produce consistently good quality work even though she had no motivation to do so. Jane left for her own mental health, one of the more selfish choices she'd made in her life.
Jane is often considered cold and callous by reporters and people who know her, like Thor. The reason they broke up was rather complex. Thor was understandably worried about her getting hurt or killed and he had a duty as the Prince of Asgard to fulfil. On top of that, he believed Jane to be callous and selfish. He didn't want to be with her due to her reminding him of how he used to be. She'd never expressed her problems to him, never explained the reason that she is the way she is and she never got the chance to. While Thor may claim it was a mutual breakup, it was really him breaking up with her. It broke her and it caused her to be very critical of people following him. He caused her downward spiral during her pregnancy but she never blamed him, always blaming herself for being weak. Jane was heartbroken but was never vengeful, she never dragged him down. When asked about Thor, she only spoke highly of him and his family- even Loki- never once dragging their names through the dirt, even though she definitely could have if she wanted to.
#(The Peasant of Asgard: OOC Post)#(The Hopeful Scientist: Jane Foster)#(Our Thoughts on a Page: Headcanons)#[It's long and I'm slightly loopy]#[Forgive me]#tw; mental health
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