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impishtubist · 1 year

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adventures in teaching

“Sirius Ambrose Black!”

Sirius chokes and drops his cigarette, which he quickly crushes beneath the heel of his boot.

“Oh, hey, Moons,” he says casually, waving a hand to wandlessly clear the cigarette smoke from the air and his clothing. Remus glares at him.

“You quit.”

“Yeah, I know, I just.” Sirius rubs the back of his neck. “Harry’s teacher wants to talk to us! Harry’s never been in trouble at school before. What could he possibly have done that requires both of us to be here?”

“Well, we won’t know if we don’t go in, will we?”

“S’pose not,” Sirius says sullenly. “Wait, Ambrose?”

“Your middle name is shit. I gave you a new one.”

“Think you can do better than Ambrose, Moony.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Lord Black,” Remus says as Sirius pulls open the door for him. “How about Cosmo?”

“No.”

“Hamish?”

“No.”

“Zephyr?”

“Let’s just get on with this, shall we?”

---

“Thank you for meeting me,” Miss Coburn says, gesturing for Sirius and Remus to have a seat in two of the child-sized chairs in front of her.

“We’re happy to,” Sirius says. “To be honest, though, we’re a little surprised to hear that Harry’s done something that requires his teacher having to speak to us.”

“Harry’s not in trouble,” Miss Coburn assures them. “He’s a smart young man, and generally well-behaved in class.”

“Generally?” Remus asks.

“Yes, and that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Harry has a tendency to, well, disrespect authority when it doesn’t suit his purposes,” Miss Coburn says. “It doesn’t happen often, but it has happened enough that I wanted it brought to your attention.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, for instance, he didn’t approve of today’s snack, so he organized the whole class to go on a snack strike until they were fed something he liked better.”

Sirius smothers a laugh behind his hand. Next to him, he can feel Remus’s shoulders shake with repressed laughter.

“I’m…sorry to hear that,” he manages. “Er, did it work?”

Miss Coburn gives him an unimpressed look. “I hardly think that is the point, Lord Black.”

“No, I suppose not.” Sirius will have to ask Harry about this later tonight. “What else has he done?”

“He has organized the class in similar fashion over the past few weeks. If he doesn’t approve of the game we’re about to play or the book we’re supposed to read together, he organizes all the children against me. I wonder if you might have a word with him about this behavior?”

“Yes, yes, of course,” Sirius says quickly. They need to get out of here, fast, before he bursts into uncontrollable laughter. “We’ll--we’ll definitely speak to him about this. And, er, it won’t happen again.”

Once outside, they both dissolve into laughter, leaning against the school’s brick wall and wheezing.

“He gets it from you, you know,” Sirius manages finally.

“Me?”

“Yes, you, Mr. Hot Shot Werewolf Activist who has been taking Harry to rallies and protests since he was five months old.”

“What about you, Lord Black, who takes Harry to Wizengamot sessions and to your shouting matches with the Minister?”

“Right, so this one is on both of us, then.”

“Probably.” Remus nudges his shoulder. “You really do have to quit, you know.”

“Quit what?”

“Smoking. At least for the next, oh, seven months.”

Sirius’s head snaps up. “You’re--?”

“Yeah.” Remus bites his bottom lip, which doesn’t do much to keep his grin at bay. “We just found out last week.”

“Moony!” Sirius grabs him around the waist and spins him in a circle. “A whole week! And you didn’t tell me?”

“We wanted to be sure, and--and I don’t know how I’m going to break the news to Harry.”

Sirius sets him back on his feet. “Hey. We’ll figure that out, okay? You and me, together. Besides, Harry will be thrilled to have a sibling.”

---

Remus is stretched out on the couch with his feet in Sirius’s lap when an owl swoops into the room. Sirius is busy rubbing Remus’s swollen feet, so Remus takes the letter from the owl and opens it.

“Bad news?” Sirius asks when Remus groans and throws an arm over his eyes.

“Harry’s teacher wants to talk to us again,” he says, holding up the letter for Sirius to read.

Sirius skims the letter, his lips thinning. Harry’s practically an angel at home. He doesn’t understand how the boy manages to cause so much trouble at school, especially at only six years old! He expects this behavior when Harry is a teenager at Hogwarts, not right now.

“I’ll go,” he says, but Remus swings his legs off Sirius’s lap and works himself into a sitting position.

“I’m coming, too.”

“Are you sure?” Sirius offers him a hand up. Remus winces, resting one hand on his belly and the other on his lower back.

“Positive. Just, ah, give me a second to catch my breath.”

Sirius drives them to the school in his car, since magical methods of transportation are currently off-limits to Remus. Remus has his cane tonight, and he also accepts Sirius’s arm for extra support. His hips have always bothered him, and the added weight of the little one isn’t helping.

Inside the classroom, Sirius transforms one of the child-sized chairs into a comfortable armchair for Remus, who lowers himself into it gratefully. Miss Coburn gives him a warm smile.

“I’m sorry to call you both in like this,” she says. “But thank you for coming. Mr. Lupin, how are you feeling?”

“Let’s just say I’m counting down the days,” Remus says, rubbing his side with a wince.

“Harry is, too. He tells me he’ll have a little brother in May?”

Remus perks up a bit. “He talks about the baby?”

“He does. He’s very excited.”

“Well, that’s a relief. He doesn’t talk much about the baby at home. It’s hard to know what he’s thinking.”

“But you didn’t call us here to talk about that,” Sirius says, and Miss Coburn shakes her head.

“No, I’m afraid not. We had show-and-tell today.”

Sirius’s stomach sinks. “Yes, and Harry brought his toy motorbike to show the class.”

“He didn’t,” Miss Coburn says, and she pulls a box out from under her desk, setting it in front of them. “Harry brought a Boggart.”

“He what?” Sirius exclaims while Remus groans and buries his face in his hands. “He didn’t release it, did he?”

“He opened the box, yes,” Miss Coburn says. “Thankfully, as I was closest to it, it turned into a seal, which all of the children found positively delightful. I cast the Patronus charm and got it back into its box, and then we had a discussion about fear. It turned out well, all things considered, but I’m concerned that one of my students was able to bring a Boggart to school.”

Sirius turns to Remus. “Yes, Da, tell me how Harry got his hands on a Boggart?”

Remus lifts his head from his hands, looking sheepish. “I caught it in the attic last week. I was keeping it in that box on my desk until I had a chance to take it to South America and release it on the reserve down there. Er…sorry.”

“So we’re going to keep Da’s office locked from now on,” Sirius says, rolling his eyes. “And I need to thoroughly inspect Harry’s backpack every time I bring him to school, apparently.”

---

Harry has Miss Coburn again the next year, to Harry’s delight and Sirius and Remus’s relief. At least Miss Coburn understands their eccentric child, and has taken everything Harry’s done in class so far in stride. Sirius can’t imagine having a conversation like the Boggart one with any other teacher.

He’s in his office at the Ministry when his secretary pokes their head into the room and informs him that he has a Floo call from Miss Coburn. All she tells him is that she needs to see him as soon as possible, so Sirius grabs his cloak and rushes off to the school.

“Is Harry alright?” he asks as he runs into the classroom.

“Yes, Lord Black, of course,” Miss Coburn says, gesturing for him to have a seat. “His grandmother picked him up earlier. But we had an incident that I wanted to discuss with you.”

“Of course you did,” Sirius sighs. “What’s the little menace done now?”

The classroom door opens then, and Remus hurries in with a wailing Teddy in his arms.

“Sorry,” Remus says as he drops into the seat next to Sirius’s, “sorry, I normally wouldn’t bring him, but we only have the babysitter until three, and my husband is in Bulgaria this week, and Mum’s busy with Harry--”

“Wait,” Miss Coburn says. Her eyes flick between Sirius and Remus. “Husband?”

“Yes,” Remus says absently, bouncing Teddy in a fruitless effort to soothe him. “He’s the director of the Department of International Magical Cooperation, and there’s been an incident in Bulgaria that’s--well, I really can’t say, but he can’t get away and the baby’s teething and--”

“Here,” Sirius says, holding out his hands. “Let me take him for a bit.”

“You’re a lifesaver,” Remus sighs, transferring Teddy to Sirius.

“I’m--sorry, forgive me, but the two of you aren’t married?”

“To each other? No,” Sirius says. He cradles Teddy to his chest, patting his back as the baby continues to fuss. “Remus has been married to Kingsley for, oh, two years now?”

“Three,” Remus says, smiling tiredly. “We got married right after Harry’s third birthday.”

“Remus and I have never been together, Miss Coburn,” Sirius says. “Romantically or otherwise. But we’re best friends, have been since we were eleven, and we were both named Harry’s godfathers. We’re raising him together. We’re both his dads. Rem, have you got a teething ring with you?”

“Oh--yes, here.”

Soon, Teddy is happily gnawing on the teething ring and drooling all over Sirius’s shirt, and they turn their attention back to Miss Coburn.

“Has Harry displayed any accidental magic lately?” she asks.

“Er, he has done for about a year now,” Sirius says. “Why?”

“I’m not so sure that it’s accidental,” Miss Coburn says, her lips twitching. “He didn’t want to do maths after snack time, so he kept making my chalk disappear every time I tried to write on the board. Then, during our quiet reading time, he kept turning his classmates’ hair different colors.”

“Just like Jamie,” Sirius says fondly. “Can’t sit still for a moment, that one.”

“He gets it from you, too,” Remus points out. “I’m sorry, Miss Coburn. We’ll talk to him.”

---

Harry is happily coloring at the kitchen table while Hope putters around the kitchen, cooking dinner. The tip of his tongue pokes out between his teeth and he swings his legs, humming to himself.

“Hi Dad, hi Da!” he greets cheerfully when Sirius and Remus enter. “Is Miss Coburn mad at me?”

“No, babe.” Sirius drops a kiss on his head and pulls out the chair next to him. Remus sits on his other side. “But you really need to stop turning the kids’ hair different colors, alright?”

“And you need to let Miss Coburn teach you maths and reading, even if you don’t like them very much,” Remus says, running his fingers through Harry’s hair. “She’s got to prepare you all for Hogwarts, remember?”

“You don’t want to be the only wizard at Hogwarts who can’t read or do maths, do you?” Sirius says, tickling Harry’s side, and the little boy shrieks with laughter.

“Fine,” Harry sighs, pretending to pout, but it doesn’t stick. It never does.

“You’ll be good?”

“Yes, Dad.”

“And you’ll let your teacher do her job?”

“Yes, Da.”

“Thanks, baby.”

“Can I take Teddy outside, please?”

“Thank you for saying please,” Remus tells him, “but you can play with him inside. He’s napping right now, so how about after dinner?”

“But Ron says there are Grindylows in the pond, and I wanna see ‘em!”

Sirius rubs his forehead. “Harry James, you cannot use your baby brother as Grindylow bait!”

“I won’t let ‘em hurt Teddy!” Harry says, sounding aghast. “I just wanna see ‘em! I can kick them, and then they won’t get Teddy. I can run really fast, too. Wanna see?”

Sirius laughs, pressing a kiss to the top of Harry’s head. “How about this? You and I can go flying after dinner, and Remus and Teddy will come out and watch us. You can show Teddy all the new things you’ve been learning in your flying classes.”

“Okay!” Harry turns back to his drawing. “And when Uncle Kingsley comes home, I’ll show him, too.”

“He’d love that,” Remus says.

Sirius meets Remus’s eyes over Harry’s head, and sees reflected in them the immense love he has for their little cobbled-together family. It might be unusual, but he wouldn’t trade it for anything.

#i did this inbetween furiously trying to meet original writing deadlines today #spoiler alert i did not meet those deadlines #oop #imp is writing #sirius black #remus lupin #harry potter #platonic wolfstar #wolfstar raising harry #i don't have a ship name for kingsley x remus #wolfking maybe #pregnancy mention #trans remus lupin #also everyone lives together at number twelve because i say so #harry has three dads and a little brother #and grandmum hope

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