#literally constantly torn between 'i wanna talk to my mutuals and make more friends!'

[transasahi]

.

#literally constantly torn between 'i wanna talk to my mutuals and make more friends!' #and 'if an internet person so much as thinks about me beyond being a vague concept who reblogs too much fanart im gonna snap' #idk fam #like yes human connection is fun and beautiful #and i'd love to have friends who understand/dont make fun of my dn hyoerfixation #but also being perceived is a fucking nightmare??? #cool anyway #i should keep this shit to my private twitter lol #keith speaks

[sebongie-loves]

youtuber!wonwoo

someone said to write more of this which i’m very happy that there’s someone who enjoys this, so here ya go! <3 

enjoy :)

wonwoo is that one youtuber that is cute, emo, relatable, awkward but seriously funny and got shipped with his own bestfriend

i mean by this y’all probably already know but his style is like daniel howell

he does random videos and probably films it at random times like this one time he made a video something like ‘What’s On My Mind at 3AM’ which literally him only talking for 5 minutes and it’s all giberish 

“who is the first person that made languages, the very first one. why do they decided to named pen ‘pen’? look at this pen, does it make you wanna say ‘pEn’? like, why?”

but actually an intellectual

savage most of the time 

saying stuffs like

“the reason why i don’t want to do collabs outside my circle of friends? uuuh snakes are not exactly my favourite animal”

probably hates everyone beside his friends

even with his friends, he acts like he hates them but everyone knows wonwoo is just a soft guy with a hard shells

like crabs 

but he doesn’t like seafoods 

ironic 

wears long sleeves jumpers or like jacket just for the sake of sweater paws that makes all of his subcribers go ‘awwwwwwwwwwww’ and soft for him

but this one time, he forgot and filmed with the sleeves rolled all the way his elbow, showing his muscular arms and his subscribers just went like ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA’ 

so his subscribers are constantly torn between him being soft or sexy like dang this boy can do both

he loves communicating with his viewers so he often goes on twitter or tumblr. just lurking and replying at 4am

does q&a everytime he ran out of ideas 

he does book review at every end of the month, like ‘January Favourites’ and does book hauls

which his viewers often joke something like wonwoo probably loves to watch make up artists that’s why he makes this kind of videos but with books  

he lives in korea. in fact, he lives there for most of his life and kudos for him, he learnt english at a very young age which makes english a language that he can speak comfortably

when he made this videos for the first time it was very impulsive like he did not expect anyone to watch him but appearantly lots of people found him cute so basically he grew up on youtube

started his career at a very young age really makes him who he is right now

sometime speaks korean and his fans just lose their shit after hearing him speaking in korean

he’s the cutest when talking about his favourite things like games, books and his friends

always spreading awareness about mental illness, equality, racism etc and not scared about it because he thinks that’s the right thing to do 

you’re just an ordinary person. living your life, which is also mean you’re binge watching youtube until 3 am when you need to wake up at 6am

your first video of wonwoo is doing a book review on your favourite books and damn the boy has the same opinion as you 

you later find him really cute and you’re enjoying his content so much that it almost makes you just stay on youtube all day all night

just like what you did everytime you found a new youtuber, you followed his twitter and his instagram and turn his post notification on so you know when he’ll drop something 

wonwoo notices someone that he thought is attractive on his comment section like seriously he cannot help himself but to search at your profile picture on his new videos and when he found your instagram and your twitter?

his life is a freakin mess because he seems like he likes you so much

it’s 3am at your place and you’re watching youtube like usual when a notification pops out from twitter. you usually found it annoying but not this time

‘Jeon Wonwoo liked your Tweet’

you almost throw your phone across the room and screaming at the top of your lungs when you found out it is the real him, not some kind of a troll but you still value your life that you hold everything so that your parents wont run to your room bringing knifes on their hands

wonwoo, in the other side, was almost destroyed his roommates’ ear and doors when he realised he accidentaly liked one of your tweets before you sending him a direct messages

“so, what’s the deal of a famous youtuber liking my tweet?”

you sent it without expecting a reply, that he would just go on with his life and forget the whole thing but no you’re wrong

“i’m sorry it was an accident”

“my tweet from four months ago?”

“.... okay i stalked you you got me.”

a direct message leads to being mutuals, being mutuals leads to giving each other personal information, giving each other personal information leads to texting all day all night, texting leads to voice calls and who know you’ll ended up video calling with him? :)

you ended up liking him as jeon wonwoo, not that youtuber wonwoo

and wonwoo should never lie about his crush on you because it’s obvious

he prioritise to video call you or voice call you 

he starts to give a content where it’s so obvious that he’s in love with someone

you love how he is always around you

he’s always there when you’re sad and comforting you

when you’re happy, he is always around to talk with you

when you’re lonely, he’s the one that is understanding

everyone around you and him know this relationship between you two and how much you want to meet them. wonwoo would like to visit but no matter how much he wants to prioritise you but he still needs to pay his bills and his foods so he’s really sorry that he cannot meet you anytime soon

all you can give him is a reassurance, saying things like ‘that’s okay we can meet someday, trust me!’

and that day comes

it was your birthday 

you’re video calling with wonwoo that is holding a small cake with candles to celebrate your birthday when your family and friends come into your room saying “we are sure that you’ll love this more than any luxurious items in this world”

that was when you found out you’re going to a trip to south korea

and now here you are, with a thousand butterflies in your stomach and you’re seconds away from meeting wonwoo

“y/n!!” 

a deep voice welcomed you, the deep voice you always heard against your phone screen or through your earphone is now calling your voice irl sounds so.. unbelievable?

no matter how hard it is to believe, wonwoo is there. standing with a cardboard that is decorated with pink glittery paint which you never expected him to hold that 

“this is my friend’s works but i guess it’s either you’ll love it or you’ll hate it.” he says with a smile, an awkward smile because he is so shy to meet you and happy at the same time 

you just can’t help yourself but to hug him and him replying the hug

“i can’t believe you’re real!”

“well i am but it’s just.. idk i’m so overwhelm and so happy that you’re here” 

he pats your head before breaking the hug. “now ready for the south korea’s adventure?”

“you mean, binge watching something in your room until 3am?”

he grinned and took your suitcase, bringing it to a taxi stop nearby. “you know me so much.”

who would’ve known? you who are living your boring life suddenly dating your favourite youtuber and now you’re in his room, in his embrace, cuddling with him?

even his touch still feels surreal to you and both of you enjoy every seconds of it

it worth your time

he is worth your time. 

going back and forth to south korea and him going back and forth to your place is not the easiest thing

who would’ve known, you’ll be living on another country with a guy and his trusty camera and his social platform that receives a lot of love by everyone?

well that happened and you two are so drunk in love 

thank you for reading!

i was writing this and it got deleted and i hope it still good despite me writing it in hurry :( and the prompt has been on my draft for 382910 years now omg 

#seventeen #seventeen wonwoo #wonwoo #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo imagines #wonwoo scenarios #wonwoo fluff #seventeen scenarios #seventeen scenario #seventeen imagines

[kaotikreviews]

WEBTOONs Time

Since I’ve found the platform, I’ve been nothing but OBSESSED. I’ve read a lot of different webtoons by now, and caught up with several. The highlight of each day has become 9pm when the newest batch of webtoons come out. 👌🏼

Today, I read the new episodes for my subscribed comics. Here are my thoughts (WARNING - may contain spoilers):

At Arms Length, by Zushi - Chapter 9.2, Trapped: I recently found this series and binged all the previous episodes, so the story still feels fresh in my memory. This comic is unique because it tells you up front the two characters that end up together and let’s you know they are healthy and happy later on. The author uses a pretty slow story progression towards that end and focuses on emotions and mental health in each episode. Since the comic is more about processing thoughts and feelings, the pace of real world events is much slower. Even so, the epis feel a bit too short (but the art is amazing, so I get it). Full disclosure, it looks like this series can get a bit raunchy at times. 👀 I was a bit torn about this comic because of my own morals and world views (I really want to say the main characters need Jesus AND all the healthy things they are doing👌🏼), but a lot of the episodes about depression really resonated with me since that’s something I’ve struggled with for literally my whole life. Long story short, I’m hooked, so 💁🏻‍♀️. Today’s epi is more of the female lead’s back story and her previous relationship. I guess it was good. I’ve literally never been in a romantic relationship, so can’t relate to the situation directly, but it’s just one of the many reasons why I wanna be forever alone. 😳 I think I always refresh like a lunatic hoping for one more episode at the end, but today’s episode did feel pretty short. Then again, every time I catch up on a webtoon, the episodes that come out after that always feel short anyway. 😂

WEBTOON GREENLiGHT - Escape from Oz: tbh, I’m not the biggest fan of the art style and the surreal take on the storyline threw me for a loop at first, but also, super hooked ngl. 😏 I love a good sci-fi. I mean, we are in the world of fantasy and fiction and break real world rules CONSTANTLY, so why not just lean in and go crazy with it? 😌 I bet you guessed, but 3rd epi definitely got a fancy 🤍 from me and now I’m hoping for it to get green lit so I can find out what happens next! 👀

My Magical Maid - Ep 9: another recent find, it only took me a couple minutes to catch up and be wanting more. 🤩 As mentioned before, fiction/sci-fi is my jam. I can get weird about witchy story lines if they wanna be really like creepy and demonic and offensive to my beliefs and world views, but if it’s balanced enough, its nbd to me. I like the series because I like stories with people with powers. How fun would it be to have super powers? It’s fun to imagine, so I love seeing other people’s takes on a day in the life of a super. Our super (a witch in this particular story world), is a maid/personal secretary type person/doctor/friend of the ruler of the land. The relationships and interactions feel very modern, but the setting is like, fairy tale times. Like, our girl is supposed to be a maid, but she’s on peer terms with the king and can speak her mind openly. It’s different, so I like it. Very interesting dynamics, I can’t wait to find out more about their back stories. Today, they closed up a story arch that threatened our otp but now.. does that make our main dude an even badder guy? lol 🧐 I mean, second lead just made main dude look kinda awful in comparison. And I never get second lead syndrome, so this is a bit of a strange perspective for me. (I don’t get second lead syndrome because the otp has a pull to it. Good relationships take time, but also chemistry.) I’m not opposed to a bad boy redemption story, so super excited to see this all play out and glad the triangle is going away. 😅 I have no idea what this gif is from, but it looks cool so ~

Lost in Translation - Ep 18: I mean, is every comic coming out this year gonna be bout stalkers?! 👀 Today’s epi was wyld (haha, pun). After reading the beginning of #killstagram and starting up It’s Mine, this plot twist is starting to feel super familiar. There’s been a stalker story arch in several other comics in my deck as well. Can’t say I’m a big fan, tbh. I hate the fact that things like that really happen, and the fact that it could happen to me or someone I care about. I’m terrible for this, but I prefer not to think about the grittier and scarier side of humanity too much. Of course, I said “too much”. A little here and there isn’t so bad, and so overall, I’m still pretty hooked on this comic. Hopefully things start to improve for our MC soon, and I’m so glad he’s getting some support from his friend.

I Love Yoo - Ep 127: bout time we got back to the sister arch! 😂 I binged this to catch up a while ago now, and so the story is starting to fade a bit. It still blows my mind how far we’ve come in the story and yet how little progress we’ve made. I mean, the family dynamic hasn’t been sorted yet, and I’m missing the friend dude, the one with red hair (I think?) yeah, it’s been so long I am forgetting his name already! 😅 I normally am super against any form of “stealing” people in relationships, but when the relationships are super toxic and bad, I sometimes find myself shipping the better relationship. (Jim and Pam from the office for example.) Truth be told, the main girl and the red head are my favorite ship, and I hope it’s the otp. All the other dudes in her life just don’t compare to the tension, chemistry, and mutual respect those two have. They bring out the best in each other and redhead really needs some help just like our MC did in the beginning. I hope she reaches out to him more (and that he ends that shell of a ship he is currently in.)

Choco Latte - Ep 38: another recent find. It’s a silent comic, which is kinda brilliant. Sometimes I read ahead on my favorite comics on Naver in the original language, but since I only really know English, it’s a very similar experience to this comic. You rely more on the expressions and context to understand the situations and how the story is progressing. I like it. I also liked how wholesome all the characters are. There isn’t a lot of nastiness between people so far and I hope that continues. It’s refreshing given the world we live in and most of the comic I read, tbh. Recent epis (including today’s) have me a bit worried tho. I hope they ain’t breaking main ship 😬 or creating a rift that would destroy the innocence and optimistic world view of our MCs. I’m a pretty gritty, glass half empty type of person a lot of times, and I call it being a realist. Fact is, life is often cruel. But in story world, it doesn’t have to be. I hope the author preserves the sweetness of this comic, but even if not, I’m down for the ride. (Unless they break up the otp, then I may quit for real.)

Not Even Bones - so I haven’t been reading this on webtoons for a while. I found out there was a book, and when it hit a cliffhanger, I scoured the internet until I found it online for free. I finished the book in a very short period of time and then the sequel. There’s still another one out that I want to read, but I needed a break. Not sure where the webtoons version is at, but I mean, this story gets DARK. Wondering how I reconcile this with all my aforementioned morals? I don’t. I believe all humans are kinda terrible, which is why I believe we need saving from ourselves and each other. I don’t believe all the stories with hopeful endings and super hero’s and saviors are just from our wishful thinking, I believe that a part of our souls is wired to respond and reach for our creator, who is actively speaking and reaching for us. Since we’ve been effectively “kidnapped” and trapped in a broken world system, it’s like we are birds that were born in cages. It’s in our nature to do certain things that just don’t make sense for our current environment but makes total sense for the environment we were created for. I believe it’s in our nature to search for something that’s missing and to fill that void with whatever and whoever we can find - many people think it’s just the way things are and don’t think about why, or they become contented with the void inside. No matter what we try to use to fill that emptiness inside, it’s never enough. Well, not until we connect to our creator and escape from “captivity”. I’ve been a Christ follower my whole life and even so, it ain’t easy. I have mad depression and I’m not necessarily a “good” person. But I’d probably be dead if I didn’t have Jesus in my life, and that’s after doing all the self help I could. No matter what I did, it wasn’t enough until I experienced hope and love for the first time in a spiritual experience. 👌🏼 I mean, if humans are terrible, and we all are constantly trying to self destruct, who can truly help us but God? People can’t be the cure for other people, and as much as self help stuff, well, helps - it isn’t a cure either. Self help can be like relying on a flaky and unstable individual to save your life - eek! 😂

For the record, my goal isn’t to stuff my beliefs down people’s throats, just sharing my thoughts. If you find it offensive, then please skip on by or think of it as a nice story (but for me, it’s as real as breathing, so I can’t help but talk about it. 👌🏼)

Anyone else reading these comics? What are your thoughts? Are there other comics that you recommend? Are there any that you fast passed on? I was super tempted to fast pass a few, but I hate having to wait longer for a new update. 😂

Today’s top song (thanks for sending it to me, sis! 💯):

#webtoon #comics #webtoon review #webtoon club #i love yoo #choco latte #at arms length #lost in translation #my magical maid #WEBTOON GREENLiGHT #escape from oz #reviews #song of the day #Spotify

[kerosene-lantern]

i just hate not knowing. i’m driving myself crazy. i feel like a female lead in a romance drama tv series being strung on by a dude that dOeS oR DoEs NOt CaRE?? and all my friends say he does but they don’t know his brain!!!! the only thing he does wrong i guess is seem kinda boring/uninterested over text to some things that i say, take fucking forever to reply, and has not shown any notable romantic pursuit in person??? like he’s never intentionally tried to hang out with me on his own???

plus, everything i’ve heard about his romantic history isn’t too flattering. breaking up with someone over text...going on a sexual bender after his 2-year long-term apparently deep-deep love last real relationship ended...how did it end? all of these things do not bode well for me. there’s nothing i’m more afraid of than a man still in love with his ex, or using me to pass the time and have some companionship. idk. yes i’ve heard from him but only the bare minimum .i guess???

am i being too hard on him? i can’t decide everyone else seems to think so. i used to tell myself that i wish he would get a gf or talk to me about other girls or something so i could at least have confrimation that he’s comfortable talking to me about that stuff. in the respect of talking about relationships its like there’s this huge wall between us. i’ve told him some things about my ex, at least enough for him to know that i’m completely over him, but idk i feel like he purposefully keeps himself in the dark?? like he doesn’t wanna share real details about his personal life with me? too afraid of getting close? afraid of emotional intimacy with me for whatever reason - afraid of how i’ll react, fear of being judged by me, etc etc. idk what i do that gives off these vibes and i hate it because my ex did the same thing. he would never tell me about his real life and real issues probably because he didn’t trust me with them. i wish i came across as someone you can tell anything to. i hate being kept in the dark. 

i heard about him being in an orgy from our mutual (female) friend for chrissakes and while shes been friends with him longer it still left and icky feeling in my stomach. idk. 

i just wish he would be honest with me. i don’t want our whole relationship ( if there ever IS ONE ) to just be fraught with me having to swallow my entire personality (fear, avoidance, pride) to get some real answers from this man. i wish something would happne that would force us to be straight up. i’m seriously considering being the one to confess and i have N E V E R considered this possibility for myself before. i’ve always had a strict policy of “approach me or nothing will happen” but thsi dude seriously has me about to break y rule because i’m so damn confused and i just want some clarity from the man himself. but also i’m afraid that he would run away at the pressure to be real. he doesn’t striek me as the type to like being put on the spot.  

he’s got me to the point where my desire for him and to be close to him is overruling all my logic that our relaitonship would put a strain on my friendship with liz (100000%) and probably our tucson squad too?? not to mention if anything ever is weird between us or worse we break up, time in class for the next two years is gonna be HELLISH. just a complete anxiety hellscape. also, there’s the argument that i’m making to myself of course that even if we were to confess our feelings and be completely honest and start a relationship or whatevah, it would be long distance virtual for two months. and i don’t trust him with that. i don’t trust him to stay interested. i don’t trust him not to find someone else and slowly pull away from me. i don’t trust him to provide the emotional fodder needed to sustain us through the distance apart because he seems fundamentally emotionally crippled. i mean i am too but not as badly so. pls. come on.

ik this is literally incomprehensible to anyone who doesn’t know the exact sitatuion from my perspective but. thoughts? am i being too hard on him? i haven’t listed any of the good stuff just all of the bad and don’t even get me stArted on how my insecurity creeps in to every facet of this situation. but there are definitely times that are so good that they keep me sustained somehow in this fantasy to get to this point of complete illogic. 

what i was saying earlier-a thought i didn’t finish- i always tell people that i wish he would get a gf or something so that it would be a complete and clear confirmation of his character and where he stands. y’know. a real answer. but the more time that passes the more the thought of him with someone else is absolutely crippling. i would be real life heartbroke. it wouldn’t be easy to get over which s u c k s because we’re not even officially dating.

but the worst part is having to hold myself back from treating him like my boyfriend. my phone lights up, i subconsciously think “boyfriend!” and want to check immediately (also v e r y out of character) bc i miss him and want to talk to him (again OUT OF CHARACTER FOR ME). i want to say stuff like “we know who wears the pants in this relationship”. he sends me cute stuff about snuggling, i have to restrain myself from saying “you have a lot of nerve being 1000 miles away and sending this snuggle bait”. it already feels like we’re dating. everything remidns me of him. every song, every couple i see, every desire i have. i catch myself thinking, “well he does this thing-” or “my boy likes-” and it HURTS because i don’t actually have any claim over him to be able to tell him these things. i’m not his girlfriend until he asks me!!!! he can say all the cute shit he wants but i am contractually obligated not to take the bait because he won’t catch me out here looking like a clown!!!! i’m constantly torn between wanting to protect my heart and thinking “nothing’s ever good unless there’s something on the line” (our friendship, our friend group, our comfort for the next two years, our hearts, my friendship with liz or whatever but honestly fuck that noise anyway......my mental health?? need i go on????)

anyway...is he just being extra careful? does he have the same cautions as me? is he afraid i’ll reject him? maybe i have given him hints that i don’t like him over the past few months by accident....bc i  was tyring so hard to seem neutral you know???? i might have driven him away, but not completely. so what is it? over caution? in love with someone else? too afraid of hurting my feelings to end the conversation? what is it :( can i just be sure that you like me and care about me? because i’ve felt that way about you for 6 months now.