#like… I genuinely don’t think I’ve ever seen a show where it’s been THIS specific before

[snowyh2o]

So, saw a video on YouTube that was analyzing if Alastor exhibited traits similar to someone diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder. It was interesting, if a bit superficial and missing a lot of the smaller blink and you’ll miss it details (as well as for some reason omitting his past relationships and focusing only on his current ones), but it got me thinking about how much we know of who Alastor is.

And I think that we actually know a lot more about who he is as a person and what makes him tick than we think we do. What we don’t know is what his situation currently is, and that’s sort of conflated with not knowing or being sure of him and his motivations.

So to list what we do know of him in no specific order:

He claims he’s sponsoring the hotel because he wants to watch other people fail for his own entertainment, something that we know for sure now is not the case, or not the entire reason.

He was very desperate when making that deal with Charlie, this is something he was probably aiming for and has been waiting to do for a long time.

His disappearance is a sore spot that he doesn’t want others to be prying into.

He’s trapped in a deal that appears to be restricting either his actions, power, or both and he desperately wants to get out of the deal.

Related, the deal appears to be new, based off Husk’s comment and Alastor’s reaction/surprise at the comment.

Related, he HATES being reminded of his deal.

All his shown past friends are women. Conversely, he seems to get along well with women over men.

Related, he lets Mimzy, Nifty, and Rosie all touch or manhandle him around without showing discomfort or distaste. He also lets Husk poke him in the chest, and appears to have grown equally as comfortable around Charlie.

Related, he offers Charlie his microphone twice when she needed to do a big inspiring speech.

Related, his microphone appears directly linked to some of his powers, and could also be considered a weakness of his should it be broken.

He knows that Mimzy only ever comes to him when she needs something, and doesn’t care that he’s being manipulated and taken advantage of into taking care of her problems. In fact, Mimzy stated that he loves taking care of her (problems).

Related, the hotel is important enough that he can’t risk having that kind of behavior with Mimzy here, that he’s willing to shoo away one of his few friends he’s genuinely happy to see.

Rosie is his best friend, he’s the most comfortable with her and while in Cannibal town. It’s the only time we’ve seen him so cheerful and relaxed and smile like he means it. His smiles here are wide enough to show his gums, but his eyes and lips reveal its not just a well disguised snarl.

Related, he’s very excited to show off Cannibal town to Charlie when he brings her over.

Related, he hasn’t gone to see Rosie since the overlord meeting despite having had 5 months to do so after coming back from his hiatus.

Related, he doesn’t ask for Rosie to help during the battle, he specifically restates his favor to “well your cannibals help at least”. She’s seen sipping tea and listening to the news in the aftermath.

His beef with Lucifer started way before he ever met the guy. In his advertisement, he makes a note to say there’s no tacky circus decor at the hotel. When he sees the welcome sign he visibly sneers at it. When Lucifer finally shows up and hugs Charlie his eye is twitching.

Related, whatever beef he has with Lucifer is unrelated to Lucifer’s attitude towards him when they finally meet, though that certainly does not help.

Related, it’s also clearly not about being the most powerful person in the room because he doesn’t behave that way when speaking with Zestial, or during the overlords meeting.

Related, he’s bothered when Carmilla reveals she wasn’t curious about his absence (which fair. I’d hope my colleagues would ask where I’ve been if I went MIA for 7 years).

He offers Charlie advice on projecting confidence and control when she’s not, a tactic he employs every minute of every day.

He tends to be helpful but in a backhanded way. He helps Charlie get out of her funk by being mean about it and mocking her for accidentally landing the hotel in hot water. He summons an old fashioned mint condition camera for Vaggie at first before replacing it with a beat up and bandaged video camera. He helps Vaggie with the advertisement after watching her struggle. He does get rid of the eggs, but only for a day by taking them with him on his overlord meeting trip.

Related, more miscellaneous menial labor is usually done straightforwardly, like fixing the wall, for the umpteenth time and apparently unclogging the toilet when nifty gets stuck.

He likes listening to people vent about and struggle with their situation.

He does not like listening to people vent about and struggle with their love life.

Whatever he’s up to it appears as though he’s truly thrown his lot in with Charlie and the hotel, at least for now.

Apparently used to be friends or friendly with Vox. And will let people take a picture of him if it’s with an old fashioned camera.

After the battle, instead of returning to the others he drags himself to his radio tower, the one that fell down off a cliff after Adam destroys the hotel. This means he didn’t head there first when he retreated, and only went afterwards once the fight was over. He was probably staying close enough to see how the fight was going, evidenced by how he knew where to go to find his radio tower.

During his mental breakdown, he’s smiling harder than ever before, and only seems to regain some semblance of control when he’s restating his current goals.

Related, Alastor’s current objective is to free himself of the deal or find a loophole around it. He’s probably planning on using Charlie’s favor for that.

Related, Alastor could’ve also wanted a favor from Charlie as general insurance in the off off chance she ends up betraying him. He seems to let his guard down around her more after the deal, and even helpfully supplies her an army without any more prompting or deal making.

Alastor’s expression when talking about making soul deals in general.

Related, Alastor’s expression when talking about how Charlie still has her soul specifically.

Used to take out last overlords for slighting or doubting him, doesn’t do that anymore. There’s a chance he stopped doing that before his seven year absence.

Related, apparently Sir Pentious also didn’t know about what Alastor did to overlords back in the day??? And they’ve fought 20+ times??? Strengthens the assumption that Alastor stopped killing overlords after he’d established himself as a top dog. Deer. And before his disappearance.

Related, while Carmilla was surprised to see him at the meeting, she and the other overlords like Zestial weren’t scared of him and accepted his presence without complaint. If he were still actively hunting down overlords I doubt, as overlords themselves, they’d have been so comfortable in his presence.

Didn’t appear to have any plans in announcing his sudden return until Vox provoked him.

Related, his broadcasts might’ve been about overlord gossip, aside from the screaming.

Shared what he can do to help during the battle with the rest of the hotel. Specifically the shield he conjures.

Related, likely volunteered himself as the one to take on Adam, since he’s the most experienced and strongest fighter in the group (Charlie’s inexperience with using her power means she’s unsuited for the task).

He speaks fondly of the group as a whole when talking to Nifty when she speaks about how much she likes them (and can we keep them, please?).

Apparently he doesn’t just enjoy watching people’s suffering but also the bonds these wayward souls form with each other.

He does, still, enjoy kicking people when they’re down. Or rather kicking people when they try to challenge him and think they have a chance.

He really knows how to get under people’s skin.

Shark snacks go nom.

Additional points from the replies:

If Alastor was sent to the hotel against his will, then whoever sent him there also did not stipulate that he couldn’t make deals with the residents, which is a huge oversight. (Peppersnap79)

Husk and Nifty appeared to stay behind and help the hotel of their own free will, Alastor did not appear to order them to stay in any way. (Peppersnap79)

My Conclusions based on more things than just what I’ve listed out: he’s probably insecure about his status in hell after the seven year absence. Whatever happened during that time is also a sore point for him, something he doesn’t want others to know about or pry into.

His reputation as the Radio Demon is very important to him. He put a lot of effort into crafting the Radio Demon’s reputation and persona as someone to be feared and not to be fucked with. This is put at risk when he nearly dies protecting the hotel.

He smiles to put himself in control, to trick both others and himself into thinking that he’s got control of the situation or himself more than he actually does. He does not like being reminded that he is not in control of his life at the moment, and his current greatest desire is freedom from his deal. The more out of control he feels, he harder he tries to smile.

He is very soft and forgiving/tolerant with the few friends he has, and has grown visibly attached to or fond of the rest of the hotel. He also appears to be protective of them, in his own weird way. Constantly defending Mimzy against whatever trouble she brings and ultimately leaving Rosie out of the actual battle. This is counterproductive to his plans, and interferes in a way he hadn’t been expecting it to. Part of his breakdown is a direct result of this unexpected interference, that his own emotions had gotten him to risk his life defending the hotel (the group).

Restating his goals to eventually escape seems to reassure him and calm him/act as a grounding mechanism when he feels like he’s losing it. He’s using the Radio Demon persona like it’s a lifeline, because the Radio Demon is who he wants to be, needs to be, if he wants to get out. The Radio Demon’s always in control, he’s the one who holds all the cards, pulls all the strings. Nothing scares him, and nothing controls him.

He’s sadistic, calculative, intelligent, spontaneous, a showman, a softie, arrogant, egotistical, insecure and paranoid. He gets attached to things more easily than he’d care to admit, and lies to himself as much as he lies to everyone else. His Radio Demon persona is just as much a part of him as it is a mask to hide what’s going on underneath. What’s there to hide if he shows them what they want to see? The audience should only care for the play, not the actors behind the scene.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #character analysis #long post #hazbin hotel meta #Alastor meta #if anyone has other things they wanna add to the list #feel free! #if I tried to add everything itd never end #also there’s a bunch of stuff here I’m borrowing from other better put together meta #I’ve reblogged the ones I like best if you wanna go check it out

[funhouse-mirror-barbie]

Rating Hazbin Characters based on if I could tell what animal/creature their supposed to be:

Disclaimer: THIS IS NOT MEANT TO BE AN ATTACK ON HH’s CREATOR/ARTISTS.

I really hate that I even have to say that, because art critique is part of engaging with art and design. People shouldn’t have to worry about being bullied or sent threats because they don’t like every single thing about a piece of media. I’m not saying these character designs are “objective bad” or anything like that.

I just realized that I didn’t know most of the designs were apparently based on animals for a long time, or until it was pointed out to me, and wanted to kind of review/examine that.

Ratings below:

ANGEL DUST—Spider—2/5:

I’m giving Angel a 2 because his design does look spider-ish to me, but I had to be told he was a spider to see the spider-elements to his design. I don’t think I would have figured it out unless told, the only time I think I could have figured it out on my own is with the spider web elements in Addict. The spots under his eyes being extra spider eyes kind of makes sense, but I don’t think I would have realized they were supposed to be eyes if I hadn’t been told. They did actually get drawn as eyes briefly when Angel got mad in the show when it came out-so that was actually really nice to see.

ALASTOR—DEER—0.5/5

Literally nothing about this man’s design makes him look like a deer to me. I gave the half point for the teeny tiny antlers at the top of his head, and because I do think his shoe print being a deer hoof pattern is kinda clever. But i should be able to see his antlers easily if they are an important part of his character design and if he’s supposed to be a deer. I also thought he was an OWL for like. 2 or 3 years while the Pilot was being animated b/c of his hair tufts. They looked like a great horned owl’s feather tufts to me.

VEE—no I’m not calling her that—MOTH

Pilot: 0/5 // Final Show: 1/5

I wanted to add Pilot Vee b/c other than Charlie her design was probably the one that seems to have changed the most. Pilot Vee gets a 0 sadly b/c, while I actually don’t mind her base design that much, and think she looks good, literally NOTHING about her looks like a moth. Is she even still supposed to be a moth? Asking genuinely b/c that’s what everyone says but if that’s the case I sure as hell couldn’t tell and still can’t.

Show Vee gets 1 point b/c I DO like the design element they brought back from her first ever design where her hair is supposed to mimic a moth’s wings laid back. I thought that was clever and fun. It’s the only thing tho that kind of points towards her being a moth. Again if I’m wrong and she’s not supposed to be a moth lmk but every source I’ve seen says she’s a “moth demon” or that her design was based on a moth.

HUSK—CAT—5/5

I mean just look at him. That’s a fucking cat alright! Only thing I may have docked a point for is the feather tail thing, but tbh it’s still very clear he’s a cat. If someone tells me he’s not supposed to be based on a cat tho I may lose my mind.

NIFFTY—???/5 (???)

Is Niffty supposed to be an animal? No, right? She’s just like. A weird creature/girl. Please tell me Niffty is not supposed to be a certain animal or anything b/c I have NO idea what animal that would be.

VALENTINO—MOTH—0/5

I literally had no idea this guy was supposed to be a moth until his coat turned out to be wings for some reason. Nothing about the coat made it look like wings to me. I thought his “antennae” were just feathers in his hat. Even when his coat became wings I was still very confused and thought for a moment he was supposed to be a butterfly? But no apparently he’s a moth. He’s got extra arms but I didn’t think that was specifically a “bug/moth” thing, b/c so many of the character designs in HH have extra features. I’ll be real I really don’t like anything about Valentino’s design and don’t understand the appeal of him at all. Sorry Val fans :(

KATIE KILLJOY—PRAYING MANTIS—0/5

I’m really sad I have to give out another 0 but like, I had NO idea that Katie was supposed to be a Mantis. I’m not sure if that’s even accurate like maybe that was just a rumor/speculation?? Right? Please let me know b/c I seriously NEVER would have guessed that she’s supposed to be a Praying Mantis. Even in her other form, I would have thought they were trying to imply she’s a spider…why did they give her 4 eyes? I can’t tell if they’re supposed to represent pseudo-pupils or a mantis’ ocelli but I never would have thought of them as that. I just thought she was like. A scary monster white lady/“karen”-type 😭

CHARLIE—PUPPY/PORCELAIN DOLL/LAMB?GOAT? THING???—2.5/5 (?)

So, based on the creator/character designers statements from a podcast, I believe that Charlie is supposed to be a sort of…amalgamation of the above? But honestly I’m not sure. I’m that statement they mentioned she had a lamb or puppy nose, and I think they mentioned before that her heels are supposed to look like hooves? But also the creator made a tweet saying they never intended her design to be a goat, so I don’t really know what she’s supposed to be. I gave Charlie a 2.5 b/c she DOES look like a porcelain doll to me. Or like. A. Clown??? Cause of her cheek marks. Idk. She at least looks like one of the things she’s “supposed” to be according to the creator, and I can see the puppy element with the nose if that’s what was intended. The lower ranking is more because I’ve heard MULTIPLE things about her design elements so I’m not sure what the intention was with her.

I would have bumped her up to a 3 if I knew what she was supposed to be, but b/c it’s been stated that she’s based on several things it’s hard to tell, and I can’t actually tell if that’s still the case.

———

I may do another one of these with some other characters. There are a few in Helluva Boss that I couldn’t really read either but most of those designs make much more sense to me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#hazbin critique #hazbin hotel critique #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel criticism #character design #character design convo #funhouse convo #character design critique #character designs #art #animation #media criticism #media critique #media conversation

[dekusleftsock]

Hey, weird comparison might be a stretch

Okay angy-grrr (yes I’m name dropping you and I’m not sorry <3333) I think made a comment a while ago about how this whole thing between Afo and Yoichi felt incestual, and I’d be inclined to agree.

However, however however however, I do have a few bits of commentary on that sentiment. Specifically in relationships to this scene specifically.

And, alright, no this is not some bs like “pro incest” or whatever, you can talk about topics that are taboo and not necessarily agree with them. I understand that I’m a shipper but I’m inclined to follow my nose where it leads, and my nose says here. So.

We’ve established a lot that the kanji horikoshi used when Izuku says “Give him back!” Is very possessive. Like an ownership over an item.

Okay, because Izuku and afo share one very weird trait—possessiveness. And for literally a month I’ve written and rewritten a post about how I just can’t get behind the idea of Katsuki paralleling afo, because it just doesn’t fucking make sense.

What is it telling us? That Katsuki has become a better person? We already KNEW THAT. The Kudou parallel says something, it says that Katsuki rises ABOVE the fate of the OFA predecessor because he and Izuku accepted their hearts.

Not only that but what is it exactly that we’re paralleling? Afo is defined by ownership (an Izuku trait), an unreliable narrator (also an Izuku trait)—in my opinion, horikoshi isn’t that simply Willy Nilly about parallels. It’s not about shipping to me rn, I’m literally comparing him to Izuku and how Izuku obsesses over Katsuki, IT JUST DOESNT MAKE SENSE.

Besides, wouldn’t this parallel be made significantly earlier, when Katsuki was still acting like an asshole? The kudou parallel was made literally from the start of his introduction, just because he looked so much like him. We didn’t know why this was the case, theories were thrown, and we’re only being told NOW why this parallel exists. But it was built, very carefully, and served a purpose.

And, to add onto this parallel of at the very least afo and Izuku, the portal is very similar to the floating hand.

Especially with the reminder that Katsuki was taken away by dabis hand on his neck (hands always have symbolism in this series after all, it always has a purpose)

If someone, anyone really, could show me some genuine evidence of afo and Katsuki parallels that isn’t just “Katsuki was selfish about Izuku when they were younger” then by all means

But to me, along with the fact that Katsuki called himself IZUKUS NICKNAME, right before a chapter where afo talks about NAMING YOICHI, ummmmmmmm… I gotta say. Things ain’t looking so great in that evidence department. I guess you could argue that Katsuki did the same thing with deku, but deku hasn’t even been said these past few chapters and Kacchan has so????? Idk.

Anyway, this weird overly attached, incestual, codependent relationship is really fascinating to me. I’m not so inclined to say that Izuku and afo are the same since they very obviously aren’t, izuku is just toxic in his silly goofy ways, but I think it’s an interesting thing to point out.

It almost feels like a “fuck you” to people who have been saying Katsuki and Izuku act like brothers for years. Maybe like Horikoshi is saying, “well I guess if they’re brothers they’re incestual too :)”

And that’s gotta be the biggest power move I’ve ever seen. “Oh you wanna read this relationship in that light? How about I show you what that light would look like if it were true :)” AND LIKE. WOW.

I know anime is not new to incest, but I don’t think this is the “random incest for funsies” type of incest, I think this is the incest built off of actually talking about the taboo. The weird. The not so great things we’ve done as humanity, but that exist anyway. Because mha WANTS to talk about the taboo, things we find morally wrong and therefore don’t belong in our stories, but that just makes them all the more incomprehensible were it to be happen in the real world. Art is made to talk about the stories we wish remained unfinished.

#bkdk #midoriya izuku #mha deku #bkdk brainrot #bakudeku #bakugou katsuki #bnha deku #mha analysis #deku midoriya

[essycogany]

Amy’s Eye Color

Since I couldn’t get this off my mind I’ve decided to dive deep into the abyss of character design. I’ll mostly add on to what I said in my tags in the, “What Eye Color Looks Good On Amy Rose,” voting post and elaborate.

Short History

Amy’s eye color from the start of her redesign in Sonic Adventure has always been the same as Sonic’s. A warm green that use to be apart of Amy’s classic dress. Which is a nice detail in my opinion. The pink hedgehog’s eyes has been somewhat consistent with Sonic’s from official art, 3D models, to the comics.

It almost always been that way aside from Sonic X. Where her eyes are on the cooler side then Sonic’s. Jade or Emerald to be specific. Her eyes are closer to the color of jewelry. While Sonic has a warmer grassier colored green. I like jade or emerald on Amy’s eyes as well, but I want to keep the topic consistent and less complicated then it already is.

Anyways, I think the minor inconsistencies was done for artistic vision or whenever the lighting would change in the comics. To be honest I’ve noticed color inconsistencies all the time when it comes to Sonic characters. Which isn’t a bad thing. It just shows how much variety you can have when it comes to these characters.

My Thoughts On Amy’s Eye Color

I don’t mind Amy’s eyes being the same as Sonic’s. It doesn’t look bad on her and is one of the reasons her design is as iconic as it is. Especially since it’s been a part of her for so long.

But let’s get into why I personally prefer teal.

I’m no color theory expert, but I’ll do my best. Also, not every Sonic character or cartoon character period, follows these rules. Just a good majority of them do.

Sonic: Blue is a primary color and green is a secondary color. Because green complements blue Sonic’s eyes stands out. Not to mention they symbolize his energy and love for nature.

Blaze: Purple is a secondary color and gold is a primary color. Her purple fur works amazingly with her harsh gold eyes. Symbolizing her fire powers. Also I’ve noticed a few artist add a bit of a reddish orange to her and Silvers eyes and I think they look lovely.

Amy: She’s a bit complicated. Since her red dress takes up most of her design I’ll use it as Amy’s primary color. I believe teal would be a better secondary color for Amy because it stands out a bit better and is less harsh then green. It gives Amy a softer look too.

Teal and pink is also a wonderful combination in general because they balance each other out. With pink’s warmth and energy going with the teal’s calm and coolness. Giving off a more enchanted and mystical feeling to Amy’s eyes. It perfectly compliments her personality too because she’s an energetic character with a soft and sweet nature.

Here are some characters with similar color tones:

They’re not all similar characteristically, but what most of them have in common is they’re kind natured and they’ll protect the people they care about. Just like a certain pink hedgehog.

See how the eyes are the first thing you notice?

These are around what I have in mind( jade/emerald are cooler greens so they work too):

The main reason I prefer Amy’s eyes to be teal is due to a lot of amazing fan-artist. I won’t give out names, (because there’s a bunch of them) but they are so brilliant and I appreciate what they bring to the Sonic feast of wonderful art.

I’ve seen it so much to the point when I think “Amy Rose,” I see her with teal eyes. I know it’s silly, but that’s genuinely what I feel works for her. Besides I enjoy talking about weird topics like these. It keeps the mind turning, you know.

I appreciate the official artist and 3D models as well. Even if Amy’s eyes are barely ever teal, she still looks wonderful without them because of those talented people.

Conclusion

Will Amy’s eyes ever be teal? Probably not. Does any of this matter? No.

Teal eyes or not Amy Rose is a wonderful Sonic character. I hope you had fun with me on exploring this wild world of colors and character design.

Stay Creative! 💜

#sonic the hedgehog #amy rose #amy rose hedgehog #fluttershy #jigglypuff #angry birds stella #gigi #blaze the cat #silver the hedgehog #sonic art #sonic x #sonic idw #character design #I adore our energetic girl regardless of eye color #fan artist ROCK #Offical artist ROCK too #sth

[im-not-a-l0ser]

Hi! Grace asker again.

I wasn’t intending to call you a misogynist by any means, I had simply seen a lot of differing opinions of Grace based on her insanity and just wanted to know if it was a female thing or if she was genuinely irredeemable. I’ve been in a few fandoms before where it was mostly just a female thing, and it gets very exhausting very quickly. But, if your dislike of Grace is because of her insane, cult-building, murderous tendencies, I get it. A lot of people just don’t like to see that in their fandoms.

However, does that same logic apply to how you view Max? He was also—in my eyes—an irredeemable monster, and it seems like the general consensus in NPMD is that life in Hatchetfield was undeniably better without him there. And he also was shown to be a huge bully and bigot in canon, so what makes it more acceptable to make him gay, yet not offer that same development to Grace?

Once again, maybe I’ll change my mind once I finish watching all of the content with her, but for now I’m just gauging where the line is here.

Okay, sorry. It's just a thing I've already heard and refuted before so I was a little defensive.

With Max, he isn't actually ever shown Ever doing or saying anything specifically about minorities, which is my main problem. Like, he's just generally a jerk, not specifically against queer people like Grace is.

I might be super wrong here, but I'm also pretty sure he's supposed to be bi in cannon. I don't know if that was Will Branner who said that or one of the Lang's, so take that with a pinch of salt.

He's definitely got way more of "I am being defensive because I am abused and I cannot be seen for how much I'm hurting," thing going on. If you haven't watched thw show, I totally get how you couldn't gather that. In one of my linked posts, I went a bit more in depth about it.

I've always tried to give any aggressor... well, not the benefit of the doubt, but I've always put thought into why someone might be doing something.

A great example from my own life was for a period of time, someone who'd bully me for years would call me by my chosen name, Conner. And then one day, when I posted something about how I'm not a girl, I'm nonbinary, he suddenly was really brash about it and began deadnaming me again. And instead of being offended, all I could think is "what on earth happened at home." Which is what shifted my view of it in the first place.

Just like how I don't like Grace, I can fully understand anyone who doesn't like Max, and i won't jump to his defense, I'll only jump to my own defense if I am specifically being attacked for how I perceive him, and even then it's just like "Oh, well, I see him like this."

Sorry for being agressive in the first response. It's not the first time I've heard shit like that, and it will not the last either.

I am interested in what you think after you watch the show, which I think you haven't based on how you're wording things, but I'm also at work, so I'm only skimming and I might be wrong. Either way, interested

#starkid #nerdy prudes must die #max jagerman #grace chasity

[raytorosaurus]

want to preface this by saying that this has nothing to do with frank himself and it is not about “frank girls vs ray girls.” i’ve just been seeing some posts the last few days - just from a small group of people, i’m not making statements about “frank girls” in general at all - and i want to say that if frank is your favourite and your reaction to ray getting similar levels of fan attention to him for the first time literally ever is to get defensive and act like this is a slight against frank, maybe think about that. especially given the recent much-overdue conversation about fandom racism in relation to ray, and especially if you didn’t engage with that conversation.

like. since the breakup and up until this reunion tour has started, frank has pretty consistently been the most popular member of my chemical romance. this is of course understandable because he’s a deeply lovable guy and can largely be attributed to the fact that he’s the one most in the public eye, but ray was out there doing regular interviews in 2016, making blog posts, even appearing on a couple of podcasts, and he was never afforded the same amount of attention from both fans and major music publications as frank has been. i know there’s a lot of factors that go into this and a lot are understandable but if you were paying attention to the recent conversations about subtle self-perpetuating racial biases in emo/rock culture, you have to acknowledge that some of those factors are inextricably tied to those racial biases. i have genuinely no idea where the idea that ray somehow gets more credit than frank/more credit than he deserves comes from - as if he’s not been consistently underappreciated by mainstream music culture because of the homophobia and ableism linked to being associated with my chemical romance in general, and also by mcr’s own fanbase because of the reasons we discussed the other day - largely, because he’s not one of their twinky white faves. frank in the past few weeks receiving less attention for his guitar/backing vocals/stage presence than ray is not in any way comparable to the way ray has been overlooked for decades or wildly mischaracterised as a) a controlling technical musician who was disenganged from the emotional and thematic messages of mcr (at best) or b) weirdly hostile towards frank or vaguely homophobic/transphobic (at worst). again, these perceptions of him are so far removed from reality and from everything ray stands for and are largely rooted in him being seen as the straight masc one for years due to his race (discussed by many people recently but for example here). also i feel like i shouldn’t even have to mention this but ray is more complimentary and respectful of frank’s talents as a musician than literally anyone else, and anyone who’s paid attention to a word out of ray’s mouth knows that.

again, this is not meant to be a criticism of frank in the slightest and obviously it’s 1000% understandable and cool if he’s your favourite. and it’s of course okay to want to discuss your own fave more than you discuss the others! but please think about how you look if you’re complaining about him not getting enough attention these past two shows specifically or acting like discussing ray = belittling frank. and please don’t take this post as a reason to get defensive. it’s just okay if someone else gets attention too and that doesn’t mean frank isn’t loved and appreciated in his own right. we don’t have to behave like toddlers.

#frank would be embarrased abt this behaviour ngl sjdkljsgs #also 'making fun of frank in an affectionate mannter' =/= minimising his talent and most of that actually comes from frank stans anyway #idk what to tag this #fandom

[nonbinaryhatboxghost]

Thoughts on the State of Trek

I would be less upset about Discovery ending if they had known going into season 5 that it would be their last. But that was not the case. The additional filming to give it an actual finale is good and I have no doubt that it will be as good a finale as they can do under the circumstances.

But recently I’ve been more observant of Trek fans online and there is a thing happening where I’ve seen far more immediate praise of Strange New Worlds and the current/final season of Picard than any other new Trek show has gotten.

Strange New Worlds is a good show! It is also specifically emulating the original series and has a straight white male captain as the lead. (yes, Pike rocks, that is not the point here)

The current/final season of Picard (which I do think is good!) has radically altered the tone of the show into a revival/sendoff for The Next Generation, as well as emulating and referencing Star Trek media of the ‘80s and ‘90s. And again, straight white male lead.

Both shows, particularly this season of Picard, have been pretty immediately praised by certain types of Trek viewers. Specifically longtime straight white male fans.

I’ve also noticed less diversity behind the camera of Strange New Worlds and Picard compared to Discovery. At least if one watches all the behind-the-scenes stuff for those shows (which I’ve been doing a lot lately). There’s not zero diversity, but Picard especially has been putting more emphasis on bringing back legacy crew members who are majorly, you guessed it, straight white males.

Contrasting that with how Discovery was met with skepticism from the get-go and is openly dismissed by certain older fans (one I talked to at work said something like “I guess I don’t get it because I’m not a millennial.”) makes me a bit angry because a lot of these same longtime fans watched and stuck through the first two seasons of The Next Generation. Those two seasons are some of the roughest television I’ve ever seen, and the handful of good episodes hidden throughout do not make up for it. But fans at the time stuck through those seasons anyway.

Why didn’t Discovery get the same treatment from those vocal longtime folks?

Why did The Next Generation, which is a very different type of show compared to the original series, ultimately become a beloved show? I’d like to believe it’s because people accepted the show for what it was once it found its footing.

But when I see comments like “Picard season 3 is the best Trek in 25 years”, I get mad. You gave Picard, a show that has two seasons with a mixed reception at best, a continued benefit of the doubt because of nostalgia for an older show, and because this season is essentially a Next Generation reunion. But you dismissed Discovery because it wasn’t “your” Star Trek show.

Literally part of the purpose of Star Trek is infinite diversity in infinite combinations. Discovery not only gave us an incredible lead character played by a Black woman, it gave us representation across the entire cast of both people of color and queer folks. As a nonbinary person, Adira’s quiet coming out scene had a profound impact on me, and later served as a helpful reference point for coming out as NB to my dad, who watches and enjoys Discovery.

Discovery spends an entire season depicting a debate between multiple characters/factions about how to handle a situation that threatens all Federation members. It does so with empathy for all points of view, and ultimately resolves this threat not with an action sequence, but a conversation. That season of Discovery (season 4) is Star Trek as fuck, and some of the best Trek ever.

Hell, Star Trek Beyond is so good that it manages to take the flashy action J.J. Abrams approach to Star Trek (which I have mixed feelings about because Trek ’09 is fun and despite his storytelling problems, Abrams is by all accounts a genuinely nice person so I won’t be shit-talking him here) and make it more properly Trek by introducing a villain who believes conflict is necessary for human evolution, which is the antithesis to Roddenberry’s whole vision for Trek of being a future where we work to resolve and avoid conflict rather than seek it.

Strange New Worlds and Picard (seasons 1 and, so far, 3) are both good and also contain great Trek. But they are also fundamentally more appealing to the nostalgia of middle-aged straight white male fans. And they are the shows that are getting more visible attention and praise.

Lower Decks is awesome and has a fantastic Black female lead in Tawny Newsome. But it meant something to have Sonequa Martin-Green and Newsome be the leads of two Star Trek shows airing at the same time.

And it means something for the live-action show with a Black woman as the lead to be cancelled while the animated show with a Black woman as the lead but a straight white male as the head writer is allowed to continue.

I don’t want Star Trek to become like Star Wars and turn into an endless cycle of fan service. Star Trek has had a huge impact on our planet over the 55+ years of its existence. Don’t make the mistake of turning it into another franchise that exists as a way for whiny white dudes to center themselves over the global majority.

(PS, Paramount, how the hell have you dragged your heels over Michelle Yeoh’s spinoff for this long? She has an Oscar now, what the hell is your excuse?)

#star trek #rant #star trek: discovery #star trek discovery #star trek: picard #star trek picard #star trek: strange new worlds #star trek strange new worlds #star trek: lower decks #star trek lower decks #star trek: the next generation #star trek the next generation #yeah I'm mad about a lot of stuff going on in the world but this is the only thing I felt knowledgeable enough to comment on

[westofessos]

So I just finished Gilmore Girls for the first time and boy, do I have some thoughts:

First of all, I love this show so much. More than I ever thought I would. It’s just so comforting. I totally get it now.

Now, for specifics.

Lorelai:

I love Lorelai. She does make some dumb choices, but in the end, she’s just so loveable and fun, I can’t help but adore her.

Rory:

I do not get the hate I’ve seen for Rory! Yes, like her mom, she makes stupid decisions, but she’s so wonderful. Maybe it’s just because I relate to her so closely, but I love Rory so much.

Luke:

Ughhhh I love love love Luke. He’s so unexpectedly hilarious sometimes?? I did not foresee that when I started. Scott Patterson is also strangely one of the best actors on the show, which I also did not expect. Luke is a gem, we love him.

Luke & Lorelai:

How could you not love these two together? They’re absolutely perfect for each other and the pining, especially on Luke’s part, makes for incredible television. I do think their dynamic kind of lost the really special ‘will they, won’t they’ tension after season 1/2, but I still ship them. So glad they ended up together. When she was still with Christopher near the end of season 7, I got a little worried.

Paris:

PARIS IS GAY. I will accept nothing less. She is queer in some way, whether she’s a lesbian or bi. She had absolutely no chemistry with any of her love interests but so much with Rory. Also she’s just amazing all around. I fucking love Paris. Make her queer, cowards.

Lane:

How could you not love Lane? She’s the absolute shit. Cool, supportive, loyal, and a fucking rockstar. I didn’t mind her with Zach to begin with (even though I thought it was a bit strange how they all of a sudden liked each other), but when they got married and had kids, that was a big nope for me. Lane Kim deserved to be a famous rockstar.

Emily & Richard:

I went back and forth on these two. On one hand, they’re very entertaining characters and I do believe they’re trying to do what they think is best, but on the other, I think in the end they do more harm than good. The way they dismiss Lorelai’s trauma, and completely disregard everyone else’s opinion because they assume they automatically know what’s best, just rubs me the wrong way. Not to mention the manipulation and the going behind people’s backs. I think there should’ve been an arc at the end where they finally listened to Lorelai and acknowledged what they’d done and tried to change for the better.

Sookie:

Melissa McCarthy is great in everything, and this is no exception. She’s so sweet and lovable, and such a good friend to Lorelai. I love her. Plus her relationship with Jackson is just lovely.

Michel:

He’s such a sarcastic bitch and I love him. I think that’s all there is to say.

The Townies and Side Characters:

Kirk - Kirk is maybe the funniest part of the show and such a little sweetheart, I love him so much.

Babette - aka the best neighbour ever. We deserved even more of her and Morey than we got.

Miss Patty - same goes for Patty! We need more Patty!

Taylor - annoying and obnoxious but the show wouldn’t be the same without him. Irreplaceable.

Gypsy - again, we needed more!! Gypsy was so funny and I just wanted more!

April - I love April! She’s so sweet. I don’t, however, like what her arrival did to Luke and Lorelai’s relationship, and I fucking hate Anna.

Christopher - I don’t hate him, but he’s definitely not one of my favourites. I think it would’ve been a lot better if he and Lorelai had just been really close friends, or if he had just been fully out of the picture.

And finally, the boys:

Dean:

FUCK. DEAN. Do I need to say more? He’s a toxic, possessive, asshole and I hate him. He was okay in the beginning, but the ‘50s episode really clinched my hatred for him. Huge nope from me. What a dick.

Logan:

Man, do I hate Logan. Obviously not as bad as Dean, but he’s such a douchebag!! I genuinely cannot stand him or put up with any of his bullshit. I thought he would grow on me as the show went on but no, I only hated him more.

Jess:

Best for last. My love for this man knows no bounds. Obviously the best fit for Rory, I love them together, but also his relationship with Luke is so great. Also, justice for his and Rory’s relationship while they were dating!! Why did we only get to see it when shit hit the fan? They kept mentioning how they were going to hang out, that they were meeting up later on, so why didn’t we get to see any of it? Why did we only get to see them when Jess fucked up? I hate that. I also hate that they didn’t end up together, even when Jess grew and changed and bettered himself. Anyway, I just love him. I could talk about him forever.

A Year in the Life:

They tried to fit 22 episodes worth of Gilmore Girls into 4 episodes, and it didn’t work. The first episode did an okay job, and I did kind of love the last episode (the wedding!), but the middle two were. . . yikes. No theme song/opening titles? No transitions? NO SOOKIE EXCEPT FOR ONE SCENE AT THE END? Michel thinking about leaving the inn and Lorelai being abandoned by both of her friends? No Jackson? Rory being with an engaged Logan? Basically no Jess except for a few scenes, one of which broke my heart? I could go on forever.

That being said, they should make more after the cliffhanger they left us on. I’ll take whatever I can get, even if it’s subpar.

Anyway those are just a few of my many thoughts about this show. I can’t believe I waited until now to watch it. I need someone to talk about this show with so if you see this and want to talk, DM me.

#gilmore girls #lorelai gilmore #rory gilmore #luke danes #emily gilmore #richard gilmore #paris geller #lane kim #jess mariano #literati #logan huntzberger #lauren graham #alexis bledel #scott patterson #milo ventimiglia #liza weil #keiko agena #sookie st james #melissa mccarthy

[uncaught-coolfish]

Penny rant

(+ruby)

RWDE below. Don’t like unedited criticism of your show from someone who’s been offended by it, don’t read.

Trigger warnings for ableism and Mentions of Suicide.

I would like to begin this rant by saying that around the start of 2020, I found out that I had Tourette’s Syndrome. Long before then I was diagnosed with ADHD, but when I found out I had Tourette’s… safe to say, It made me feel much more different about myself.

The disability had always been something made to sound awful. It was the “You’ll blurt out bad words at the worst time” disability, when it really… isn’t. It’s a lot more than that, but at that time, when 2020 was an already fucked year for all the obvious reasons, I felt bad about myself.

I felt bad because this whole time, I had something in my brain that I knew was going to absolutely wreck my future experiences. With it, my anxiety got worse, and that’s something I still struggle dealing with.

But also around that time, the seventh volume of a certain show was coming out: that show, RW//BY.

I’m not going to talk specifically about V7 in itself, but I will talk about one very important part of it:

Penny was back.

Since her debut, Penny Polendina was easily one of my favorite characters, if not my favorite in the whole cast. In a cast of already colorful characters, she was the one I arguably related to the most. She was this sweet, fun ray of sunshine who… was also a robot. And it was expressed to us early on that it was something she felt slightly insecure about.

And to note, Penny has almost always been a character people have coded as disabled, that sentiment being even more prevalent in her return. Namely, she was coded as autistic for many.

And when Penny spoke to Ruby about her being an android, I… remembered the first time, coming to telling the friends I’d known for years that I had Tourette’s. Just like this fictional character, I was worried they’d start treating me differently because of my disability, or if they’d just… outright leave me.

But Ruby didn’t treat Penny any less, robot or not. Because the thing that mattered most was her heart, and no matter if she was a robot, she was still a real girl.

…Yeah. Safe to say, that kind of message hit me hard. So when she came back in V7, after such a heartbreaking death in V8… I was very happy :) (me when I’m putting it lightly)

PENNY! WAS! BACK! And honestly, in V7 I think she was handled better than I’d expect. Where V7 had problems, I don’t find myself thinking Penny was one of them.

Hell, she became a maiden! Even furthering that she was a real girl, no matter what. And like I said before, at the time this came out, I really needed something like that.

But then there was V8. V8 began at near the end of 2020, and…

I’m going to say it.

This volume is genuinely one of the most cuntshit garbage things I’ve ever seen in any show. And I mean that with all the frustration, anger and disgust I can.

Because do you remember when I said, Ruby reassuring Penny of her still being a real girl was something I seriously needed at the time of watching this show? Because of how much it reminded me of my own experiences with my own disability?

Volume 8 essentially told me my disability was a curse. It made me less human. And my friends saw me as nothing more than that disability, nothing more than that curse.

Forgive me if I’m being hyperbolic. Forgive me if I’m being a whiny bitch about a stupid fucking dogshit fictional show made by the transphobic racist and ableist fuckers you lick the disgusting boots of.

In an already horrifically ableist volume, Penny was forcefully converted into becoming human. They had that part of her so many people including myself saw as her disability stripped out of her without her consent, to let it die before our eyes. 

Even framing it as the “worse” version of her. Her inferior, inhuman self.

And then, they had her stand barefoot and gloveless to show she was “finally a real girl”, and then at the last episode of this volume they had her be assisted in killing herself.

Remember how I mentioned how anxious I was about telling my friends about my Tourette’s? How I worried they’d see me differently, or stop talking to me altogether?

But how this show’s portrayal of a similar situation, to me, helped calm me?

Never said the ending of that story, did I? Because there wasn’t one. My fears were right, because half of my friends whom I’d known for years all but left me the instant they learned I had Tourette’s.

And then I watched as Ruby, the same girl who told the character I related to the most that she was a real girl despite her artificiality volumes ago, force Penny into becoming a human without her consent?

Yeah. You know the message I got at that time from that? 

That my friends would accept me better if I just got rid of my disability. That I just wasn’t me enough because of it.

And then they killed her. They killed Penny for good, and by that, I mean they had her commit assisted suicide. All so a white, rich cop princess could get her powers.

Yeah. That’s fucking fun. I love this. I hope whoever wrote that garbage never comes into contact with a real disabled person in their life, genuinely. Again, sorry if I’m being pissy. I’m not whole enough either, apparently.

And then came V9. I’d consider 2023 to be one of the lowest points of my life. I feel less in control of myself. My anxiety is through the roof. I’m irritated and distracted by the slightest sound or movement. I’m worried I’m losing more friends, if I’m embarrassing myself, and I just feel like I can’t do anything right anymore.

That I’m not me anymore.

And in V9, there was a fictional character who i… again, found myself relating to.

And that was Ruby.

Ruby in this volume is a character who i related to a lot, just as I did Penny. She was struggling with similar things I was, and am, currently struggling with.

And just like me, her emotions and feelings and struggles were being all but ignored by the friends around her, until they finally burst out. Ruby’s breakdown in Episode 7 was, in a funny way, cathartic to me, because the amount of times I’d break down in a similar way… I probably couldn’t count. I thought this show would never let a character’s emotions come out in a way that wasn’t meekness or quiet crying, but here I was, watching Ruby fucking Rose rightfully call out the friends, her older friends, who had all but ignored her this entire time.

And like… Yeah. Let her fucking bake, dude.

And then episode 8 happened and I watched that character I related to the most at a time when my mental health was at its absolute worst be beaten down to a pulp and then kill herself on screen.

If you come complaining to me “it was medicine”, “it was therapy”, take this as a note: Fuck off. Maybe that’s mean, but… fuck off. Because they sure as hell didn’t make it seem like it, and I’m not buying it one fucking bit.

The main character of this show finally gets to express her emotional state in a way that’s not palatable, that’s almost real, and how is she rewarded the episode after? How dare she have those feelings, Ruby is beaten down again and again and again and watches the one companion she still has get crushed beneath her tormentor’s shoe.

And what do her friends, including her sister, do? What do they do when they see their youngest friend, their teammate and leader, the one who’s inspired one, partnered another, and been the little sister to?

Fucking. Jack. Shit. They don’t do a single fucking thing but stand. Tell me it’s them in shock, I fucking dare you.

They watched their friend take her own life after being beaten and beaten and beaten and the next episode they’re all hugging and smiling. So fun. So fucking fun.

So fucking fun they pulled this shit and still had the gall to say you are enough.

Maybe I am. Maybe I am enough. Oh wait, I’m disabled. I’ve got Tourette’s and ADHD. That’s my bad. I’m not enough, actually. I need to have those parts of me ripped out of my brain so then people will accept me.

Then I’ll be a real girl.

So. Fucking. Fun. 

You can like RW//BY. Hell, I do. I really do. I wouldn’t dedicate my blog to talking about it if I just hated it. There’s still so much I do like about this show, and it’s inspired me in dozens of ways creatively. 

But to me, it ends there. I like RW//BY. But RW//BY is not a good show.

And that’s not because of some vision not being followed. Not because of some ship becoming canon or not canon. Not due to some “wasted potential”, “unresolved arcs”, “unlikable characters.”

RW//BY will never be a good show in my eyes, in the eyes of an actually disabled girl, because of it’s continued failure to address real, serious topics.

Whether it be racism, abuse, mental health or disability.

And no matter what take I read, what someone tells me, and no matter what this show as it’s own will try and try and fail and fail to get me to realize, that won’t change.

Maybe my feelings are wrong. Maybe they’re not palatable enough, and this is all just some inarticulated horseshit im spewing through the text.

That’s fine. That’s okay.

I can’t really bring myself to care anymore.

#rwde #tw sui mention #tw ableism #half of this is like a personal vent lol but I just wanted to get this out there. it’s been on my mind for a long while

[dragonfly0808]

Don’t want to be mean or anything but why are you giving so much things to Flora? Without even talking about her story and all, why is she the best/second best dancer when there is Aisha (even Stella or Musa dance in the show, I’m not counting season 8 in it because it sucks). And why is she the second best singer after Musa when she literally never sing in the cartoon and the only canon singers are Musa, Bloom and Stella?? Also her being the best fighter is so weird like in the show she was probably the less probable one for that (I know you’re doing a rewrite and changed things but I’m still pointing it out). Like I’m really not trying to sound rude or saying you shouldn’t do things the way you want to do, it’s your opinion and everyone has the right to have their own. I’m just genuinely curious if you are doing that because she is your favorite?

Ummm… Like- I get the question but she’s really not the best at anything? Only Potionology after that she may be the second or third best but like-

Aisha is the best dancer, she’s literally teaching both ballet and modern dance right, she’s the best. I gave Flora ballet cause she just gives me ballet vibes (I genuienly don’t remember ever seeing Musa or Stella dancing…) and then for a singer I lit just said Helia is the second best not Flora. Again, Flora just gives me soft but good voice vibes but no one would be near Musa’s level. The ones I mentioned are all good in general but not near Musa’s level. Maybe Helia comes a tad bit close but still.

I don’t remember ever seeing Stella sing in the show and kinda ignore Bloom singing out of biterness cause it should’ve been Musa singing

Finally about the fighting, up to where i watched the series the girls were never seen physically fighting so I chose to make Flora the ‘fighter’ due to her relationship with Riven and coming up with the idea of Riven teaching her to box/hand to hand on s2 as a way to deepen their friendship and make what they were teaching each other (Riven helped her a lot to stand her ground) almost literal.

I also made her the fighter cause I felt like it would be empowering to her character for her to be the first to learn to fight physically due to her previous history. Also also, while I have given Flora a most of the emphasis on that, I have mentioned the other girls training with the boys a bit (specifically I remember bringing it up with Musa and Bloom).

And like- they do have their own things? Aisha is the best dancer, Musa is the singer/artist, Flora hasn’t ever sung or written songs in the rewrite I just answered that off of vibes cause, in the rewrite Musa and Helia would be the only ones to actually realistically sing considering the plot (also Bloom due to me mentioning her being in her theater club, that’s why she’s in the list of good singers). Flora is the potionologist that’s why she works at a lab.

Stella has fashion. Tecna technology/engeniering more recently and Bloom has history, mythology and drawings, all 3 of those things are never touched by Flora and, whilst I’ve shown her fighting hand to hand and *small spoiler* will show her in s4 with a dagger (since in s3 I mentioned her taking basic dagger technique in RF with Riven) she’ll never be shown with a sword, bow, or phantoblade or any other tech usually reserved for the boys cause 1) it was never established and 2) it wouldn’t make sense for her character. ALSO S4 will be big for the girls fighting more physically, specifically Flora, Aisha and Bloom.

Another reason for her being the 3rd best singer is that Lynphea just gives me the vibe of a very artsy planet, I personally relate nature with what I would call ‘soft art’ like ballet, singing folk songs and stuff like that. I could totally see Flora singing smth like The Hanging Tree that’s the main reason

And yeah she’s absolutely my fave I don’t think there is a single way I could possibly deny that but like… I can see where you’re coming from but I genuienly don’t feel like I give her everything. I pay a lot of attention to her when it comes to artsy shit cause again- I relate nature (Lynphea) to art but like- I don’t give her too much?

Do i? I feel like I might but if I do like- it’s not in an exagerate way, I do try very hard to give all the girls their own stuff and time in the spotlight but I am very aware of my bias towards Flora but I do not feel like it’s blatantly obvious most of the time

#like she’s my fave but i don’t give her everything #The only thing i give her in excess is trauma #winx club #winx rewrite #winx #winx headcannon #winx fanfic #winx headcanons #winx flora

[altschmerzes]

Gav I am SO sorry for the length of this ….. also I am going to send a general “how are you doing ask” because this is all Jamie stuff (very therapeutic to talk about him after the week I’ve had) so I hope that’s okay!!!

Okay. So.

Jamie in this episode? A delight. I mean, he’s always a delight but WOW, I didn’t think I could love him more. And I LOVE that he was so happy and silly and having fun and I don’t want my take to take away from that (because I have been in the state I think he was in many times before).

I don’t know if this was intentional from Phil, but I think Jamie was manic in this episode — specifically trauma induced mania. I think that Amsterdam, understandably, was a HUGE trigger for him.

In that heartbreaking scene where Jamie shares something very difficult with Roy, he says “even though my dad weren’t there, it was like he was still with us, y’know?”

Cut to:

Jamie mimicking his dad’s mannerisms from his very first scene (the play punches, the frenetic energy)

Jamie reverting to being a prick for all of two seconds (the tie your laces comment was probably something he heard from his father) to see how far he could push Roy before Roy snapped at him

Running Roy ragged across the streets of Amsterdam the entire episode lol

This sent me spiralling a little because there is SO much evidence to show that Jamie was in trauma / manic in this episode, and how those mannerisms relate to that.

Cut to:

Nonstop movement, running, round offs, bouncing up and down on the spot

Lack of attention span and impulsivity — deciding they need bikes and running off to find them using his street smarts (again, likely mimicking what he has seen his father do) and also deciding that they HAVE to find a windmill. Like absolutely determined, nothing was stopping that boy lmao

Peaking in energy and then suddenly calming down once he’s taught Roy how to ride a bike

Info-dumping and non stop talking

Being confused why Roy wouldn’t want to join in on his imagined adventure “these bikes have just made tonight AMAZING!”

Now listen. Being a person with mania, you can be manic and still be …. you. I think so many of these Jamie moments are hilarious and adorable and not all down to that, but he was DEFINITELY in trauma … getting to that now:

He’s in this crazy good mood the whole night, and then he decides to share ….. the thing ….. with Roy. I think that might be his subconscious bringing up this trauma and sort of explaining the mood he’s been in, which is extremely chaotic for the entire episode until he voices it. Even if he doesn’t KNOW it’s traumatising (“she loved it”), there is something going on here. And the fact that he SUBCONSCIOUSLY, maybe even consciously I don’t know, recognised that being in Amsterdam was a trigger for him and then apologised for the way it made him behave ??????? I’m actually tearing up thinking about it I’m so fucking proud that is UNBELIEVABLE

Also. “I don’t really remember.”

I don’t think I need to explain to you how fucking heart wrenching that is but. Fuck.

This is a super jumbled and badly put mess of an ask because I am very sleep deprived but. This episode just meant so much to me because I relate to Jamie SO MUCH in this. I have genuinely had a night very similar and I am almost certainly projecting but. Yeah. To people with abuse trauma, at least for me, this was genuinely the most nuanced depiction of it that I’ve ever, EVER seen, and I don’t even know if they did it on purpose.

IM SO SORRY FOR THIS ITS NOT VERY GOOD READING IT OVER. I am definitely projecting. And also want to be clear that it isn’t JUST trauma stuff like this is also a very wholesome development in Roy and Jamie’s relationship with some very touching and hilarious moments that I’m terrified to undermine and I’m scared it’s an awful take but. Just needed to share it with you

ALLL MY LOVE AS ALWAYS <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

never apologize for long messages!!!! i love long messages i love hearing from and chatting with my pals including my pen pals.... and like yeah. yeah i have been so much thinking about all of this. like he was happy! he was really happy at a lot of points in that episode but it had a bit of a weird exaggerated energy that didn't click until that point later when he told that. frankly brutal story that like ah, okay, that all makes sense now. he was upbeat and happy and it was clear he was having a good time and like you said, it was a lovely and touching and hilarious sequence in their subplot but 'manic' is the word that kept coming to mind. like, when you've got a mix of horrifying feelings and happy feelings about something and you decide no, i'm HAPPY i'm focusing on the good part i am FINE it's FINE it's all FINE, see how happy i am? see how normal and not ruined i am??

and yeah same i feel the same way about like- regardless of whether it was done intentionally that combination of that almost manic energy and 'i don't remember' and the way he brings it up as like- you get the feeling, really, that he knows on some level that what happened to him there was deeply, profoundly not okay, but doesn't quite know how to talk about it? gave me the same feeling that some of his comments earlier to higgins and ted did like. 'i want someone to tell me this wasn't okay, but i don't know how to say it.' and yeah like. the i don't remember comment... man that hit hard. his behaviour in that whole scene hit hard.

and that line about like. even though he wasn't there he was there with us..... winded me. that line winded me. if you grow up with an angry man in your house there will always be an angry man in your house, if you are born in a burning house you think the whole world is on fire, etc etc. it's a really complex and extremely familiar portrait of abuse trauma and i really, really appreciated seeing it. even if it's reading too much into it, even if it's projecting, i really appreciated it.

and man the whole thing especially with him bringing it up and then apologizing to roy like- i'm really proud of him for that too. he's trying really, extremely hard this season and doing such a good job of Being An Adult, being responsible, being accountable, being Good. even in situations where it has to feel unbelievably scary and threatening - going to the coaches about zava and presenting his concerns to the whole room full of authority figures he admires and respects, telling roy that story and then taking the initiative to apologize, even before this season, 'if you know how to make me better, i want to hear it' - it's just like. he's giving everything he has to do better, be better. he's- gutting himself, in pursuit of Being Good, in a couple of different ways and MAN it's like. it's hard to watch but it's incredible to watch at the same time. man. there's a reason this character absolutely kills me.

#gav gab #gav answers #letters from o #it's not signed but i'm like 95% sure this is you slfkjsd tell me if it's not!! #abuse cw #rape cw #implied by the context of what we're talking abt anyway #man. just. maaaan. #long post #ted lasso spoilers #i don't care if anyone wants to get weird at me for 'reading too much into it' or 'taking it too seriously' or 'it's not that deep' or w/e #i don't care anymore. who gives a shit. i get to have my little agenda and that's fine #abuse victims/survivors get to be invested in representation of our stories

[absynthe--minded]

Hi! Sorry to bother, but do you know where I can read more about Tolkien's opinion on queer relationships and queerness in general? I haven't read all of the letters, but in one of them he says some icky and misogynistic stuff about (het) relationships and I was kind of disappointed. (I don't mean this in a 'gotcha' kind of way, I'm just a queer person who's genuinely bothered by some of his views and wants to learn more)

I don’t think it’s any sort of a gotcha!

The short answer (there is more I have to say, but I’ll give you the important bit first) is that Tolkien never made any explicit and confirmed statements one way or the other about queerness. I’ve seen some people allude to things but I’ve never found anything concrete, and this fandom and this scholarly field are both homophobic enough that if there were anything he said against queer relationships we’d have all heard it by now. also, seriously, good job digging deeper into his views and interrogating them - he was far from perfect and honest, forthright engagement with his flaws is basically the only way we’ll move forward and tackle them.

the longer answer is that while he was both openly sexist (ranging from pretty bad misogyny to “uh, have you ever met a woman in your life?”) and openly racist (usually taking the form of “repeating any ethnic stereotypes he came across without any thought of their relationship to reality, and having no idea of what was or wasn’t offensive”) his feelings on queerness are harder to find. this isn’t that unusual - even people we’ve been able to confirm as queer or probably queer are in many cases silent about their relationship with their sexuality, and Tolkien was in a position where even if he himself was queer (which, by the way, is my opinion) he’d probably have no incentive to say so directly.

because this fandom and this scholarly discipline are so overwhelmingly cishet, queer scholarship of Tolkien is in its infancy, even to a point that means most people who are open to queer readings and queer interpretations will balk at trying to argue for the canonicity of queer relationships and queer subtext, there’s also not a lot of writing on this subject by biographers or other academics. however, there’s a fair bit of evidence that at least argues both that Tolkien was okay with IRL queer people and he was consciously engaging with queer themes in his works.

what we know is this:

he was friendly with W.H. Auden (gay), and a deep admirer of the works of Mary Renault (lesbian who wrote historical M/M fic focusing on the classics, sort of a midcentury Madeline Miller but more focused on historical accuracy). in fact he’s on the record as saying he loved Renault’s books (specifically The King Must Die and The Bull from the Sea, though possibly also The Charioteer and The Last of the Wine, both of which are explicitly gay fiction) and the fan letter she sent him was among his most prized correspondences

he was Catholic, but he purposefully wrote stories or developed narrative ideas that weren’t directly in compliance with Catholicism, and he did acknowledge that in one case (specifically the Gift of Men and the concept of euthanasia as a blessing) he was interested in exploring concepts as good stories rather than moral messages - this shows that his faith wouldn’t have necessarily bound him to only depict homosexuality badly

he wouldn’t have suffered socially for speaking out against queerness (other authors of his circle like C.S. Lewis were more vocal) but he didn’t, which indicates a choice not to

he was aware of and directly inspired by Homeric epics alongside Northern European sources, and this does include the Iliad

Quenya doesn’t have gendered pronouns, and we know that in at least one draft he changed gendered words like “husband” and “wife” to “spouse”. he also depicts elves and dwarves as having a high degree of androgyny, and elvish marriages are not explicitly required to be between a male elf and a female elf

his inclusion of vital and important relationships like Túrin and Beleg, Frodo and Sam, and Fingon and Maedhros alongside equally important het relationships indicates that he was interested in giving space to M/M that blurs or steps over the line between platonic het-approved friendship and queerness

there’s something to be said for how British midcentury queer literature depicts queer men as sad outcasts at war with their true nature who can’t ever be happy, and how Tolkien writes a lot of men in relationships with other men who are in that position except they’re miserable because of outside forces (the Ring, the Oath, Morgoth’s curse, their failings as people apart from relationships) and their deep connections with other men are the happiest and best part of who they are

this is, as you can see, both an area that really needs further study and an area that has just enough to suggest that he wasn’t a garden variety homophobe.

I hope that helps?

#replies #absynthe’s meta #queer tolkien scholarship is basically a ghost town

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I’ve figured it out! I’ve been saying for many months now that it’s fucking weird how much Sam Campbell looks exactly like a certain, very common type of wrestler I know. Specifically, the guys in the smaller categories, guys who compete at 57-ish kilos in university but you know they were competing at 44 or smaller when they were in high school. All those guys have this really specific look, down to clothing and hairstyle but also it’s about their build and facial structure, and I did not even realize how specific the look was until I saw Sam Campbell and realized it’s the first time I’ve ever seen someone outside the sport with that look. It looks so weird to me to see it out of its normal context.

Anyway, I think this part of that article explains it:

“I was very small growing up” – a feature he thinks contributed to his pursuing comedy. “My parents were legitimately going to give me horse hormones to make me grow, because I was really small for a long time.”

Ohhh… that’s what it is. Wrestling is the sport of guys who were too small as a child/teenager. I think I know four people who have specifically told me they were put on hormones growing up because they were too small, and I think of a lot of other people who probably were or almost were, I just don’t know them well enough for them to have told me.

One of my good friends, a few years ago, who was a couple of years younger than me and had a massively successful competitive career before joining our team as a coach, told me that that’s exactly why he started. This guy was successful enough to have made promo videos, to advertise the national team’s international runs and things, where he talked about how he loved the sport since he was a kid. One day at the pub after practice, he told me that’s not why he got into it at all. He got into it because in high school, the girls didn’t like him since he was too small, and his parents had to put him on hormones just to keep him barely big enough to be healthy, and he had to have something to make girls like him despite his size, and all the sports besides wrestling required people to be big. Wrestling was the only sport with weight classes, where anyone could join because they’d be matched up with people their own size no matter how small they were. The average wrestler is much shorter than the average person outside the sport, because it’s where the small people can go.

Anyway, that’s the look Sam Campbell has, and that’s why it was so familiar to me. The look of a guy who was off-the-charts small when he was young, and then grew into someone who’s just a normal level of smaller-than-average. There’s a specific build that guys like that have, which is different from guys who are a normal level of small as adults because they were a normal level of small as teenagers.  The proportions are different.

…I genuinely don’t know if it’s fucked up for me to write a post going into this much detail about a stranger’s physical features. Hanging out on Tumblr may have skewed my perspective of what’s appropriate. So sorry if this is a weird thing to say. But I am truly pleased to have solved a mystery. He looks familiar because he’s one of those guys! One of those guys who used to be much too small and now he’s just small, but in a way where you can still kind of tell he used to be much too small! Those guys! Cool! I like those guys! Some of my best friends are those guys!

I guess if you’re that guy in high school and you’re not interesting in sports, you try comedy instead. Good for him.

The rest of the article is quite interesting as well, explaining how he ended up where he is in comedy. The thing I've chosen to focus on is really the least interesting part. It's worth a read.

[asteptowardyou]

Changhee has one of the oddest character arcs I have ever seen, because you would never have expected him to be relieved to have accidently walked into a course for funeral directing, realizing this is what he’s been called to. While I personally didn’t find him annoying at the beginning of the show, I know many viewers were not a fan of his complaining and rambling. I wouldn’t have expected him to be so genuine and introspective, but he is a new favorite character of mine. I think I understand a lot of his behavior as a middle child myself. I don’t think I’ve often seen stories with people in their 30s still figuring out their dream, because a lot of media portrays adults in their 30s either still chasing a seemingly impossible dream or giving up on a dream and learning to work a mundane job. Liberation from a mundane life is something I’ve seen before, but I’ve never seen it be tackled the way My Liberation Notes does. 

When we’re introduced to Changhee, the obsession we find is the car. The car that will reduce his commute time, end his dependence on public transportation, and give him more independence to date and travel. But a car isn’t really a dream. It’s more so something that would make his life more convenient and would allow him to use his time more intentionally. When Changhee starts realizing he doesn’t have a dream, I truly began to feel a certain kinship with his character, because a lot, if not all, of my motivation is driven solely by others, especially my family. I don’t have the desire to achieve something big. I want a peaceful and fulfilling life, doing something worthwhile, but I don't know what that looks like for me. That's not to say that I have never dreamed of a specific career or of how I want my adult life to play out, but now that I'm reaching the beginning of adulthood (and awkwardly shying away from it as best I can, honestly) I'm realizing that most of my dreams were facilitated inherently by others prompting me to find what I want to do. But I don’t yearn for a career. okay, not true, I so deeply want to be a good writer and have people find my writing interesting, but easier said than done. I want to exist and to exist joyfully. 

I really love this idea of Changhee saying his soul knows where he should be before his body does and so his body moves without him fully understanding it at first. I'm guessing Changhee is in his mid- to late-30s, and he's already been present for four deaths. Like his employee was telling him, why was he studying art so intently? That wouldn't make him a Seoul man, necessarily, although it is good to study and familiarize yourself with your new home. I had the sense that Changhee would eventually return to living outside of Seoul. Though, that's not what really matters right now. What matters is that he was at the right place at the right time, and he realized, oh yeah, this is the place I'm supposed to be. This is what I'm supposed to do. I'm able to comfort people, to help people pass peacefully. I know how to be with someone when they need it most. To just be present. In the moment. In those last moments when all you want is to not be alone. Changhee is filled with the realization that he does not run from or fear death. He’s willing to risk it all, risk his chance at financial success, to help Hyeoksu rest in assurance that he is there with him and will be with him till the end, to help him go peacefully, gently. It is so interesting, and as I said, so odd to think of looking back on his character, because it felt like he was too frustrated and unhealthily obsessed with things he didn’t have, but I think it’s fair to say that a lot of that was him going through the motions of having to adult and not feeling fulfilled with his life. It was hard for me to pinpoint what Changhee was seeking liberation from after he quit his job. Once we see him using Gu’s car, Changhee begins showing a gentleness to him, so I thought, well, he wants to be freed of that frustration and annoyance from his job, because it isn’t in his nature to be irritated. And there is definitely some truth to that. He did want to be liberated from that, and he was in the end. However, it’s more than that. It’s about ambition. I don’t think Changhee was actually ambitious, although he appeared to be. I think he forced himself to have ambitions because that’s what one does when you attempt to become independent. He’s just someone who inherently understands people well, which is very powerful, and he didn’t know before what to do with that. What he lacked was purpose. And as he’s said before, his legs led him to where he needed to be. Changhee is an incredibly interesting character, and I know I’ll continue pondering many of his lines from throughout the series as well as his unexpected arc. 

#my liberation notes #my liberation diary #my liberation notes episode 16 #yeom changhee #yeom chang hee #i love changhee's character dearly

[esther-dot]

Hi, i sent that link for more reference about the subject. The more the merrier, right? And i think it's always nice to appreciate the efforts of all the meta writers, old and new ♥

Curiously, the other post from 2017 you linked (by princess in a tower), was written after the convo in the link i sent (marydri was princess in a tower old url).

Have a good day :)

(Continuation of this convo)

I genuinely do believe “the more the merrier” which is why I always attempt to link to posts if I know where I first heard something, but I’m also reluctant to go too far into the “crediting” idea because the last time this came up, it wasn’t a celebration of what the older Jonsas had written, but an attempt to make a newer Jonsa meta writer feel like crap. It wasn’t used to include, but was a deliberate attempt to discredit and just kinda, exert ownership of ideas and prevent people from taking things in new directions.

As a Jonsa, a fan of a ship that only exists because fans decided to come to their own conclusions and offered new readings on characters and dynamics, even reinterpreted themes of the story, you have to understand just how off-putting and counterproductive that behavior seems to me. I want every jonsa to feel heard and appreciated for their efforts, for them to enjoy the fandom, which is why, when I’m active, I do my best to both boost newcomers and link to older metas, but prior experience with this works cited idea has made what I consider a pleasure, a real minefield.

Fandom is all about how we inspire each other to create, it isn’t just about the source material. A comment sparking a meta, a meta inspiring characterization for a fic, a fic inspiring art, I’ve seen all of that and think it’s a beautiful thing. So no, I don’t think that’s “curious,” I think it’s perfectly normal for a comment to inspire someone to write a meta. I’ve tagged people in asks to get them to write about an idea, had other people then write metas about it. I like it! Also, ifeas grow in unpredictable ways, and we’re all engaging with our beloved book or show via different mediums and on different websites and in many different languages, so choosing to assume the best of each other’s motives is necessary, and I’m wary of anything that discourages people from engaging. We don’t know which meta someone else has read. For a while, I read all the knew meta, this year, I haven’t even tried to keep up. Sometimes not being credited isn’t an exclusion, it’s simply because you weren’t part of the journey for that specific individual. I’ve seen people come to the same conclusion following very different paths a lot in fandom! And generally speaking, I’m really not sure how “ownership” of a parallel or of a theory works? Waymar’s death foreshadowing Jon’s or that he’ll lose an eye or that we’ll get romantic Jonsa, all are offshoots of the basic “these guys are described the same way,” but I’d think it a bit odd for the person who first noticed the parallel (years before it became a Jonsa thing) to feel ownership over everything that came after.

An infamous example of the futility of theory ownership is the poor blogger who came up with a Sansxn version of the Ashford theory which Jonsas looked at and said, “you do not know what to do with this but we do!” and ran with it, and they’ve been trying to squash people jonsa-ing it or speculating about Sansa x Aegon ever since:

You get the idea. It’s a great theory, I don’t like the original ship, but kudos for op for noticing the parallels. They saw something, someone else saw it too. Many, many people ran with it. It’s inspired a general “Jon is the last suitor” or specific, “Jon will literally go to the tourney” spec in our fandom. I’ve read lots of stuff about it and enjoyed it all. However, I don’t assume everyone who writes about the Ashford Tourney is stealing from the op. I genuinely think a lot of fans didn’t even know where it (potentially) originated, and I certainly don’t think the original goal of the theory (Sansa ends up with the Hound) precludes reinterpretations.

Anyway, I absolutely make an effort to credit Jonsas whenever I can, but having witnessed what I have within our fandom, and seeing how other people treat Jonsas because of this stuff, I’m resistant to getting bogged down in this issue. I don’t want fans to feel like they can’t post about Waymar without someone vague blogging because they weren’t credited. I’ll gladly read a dozen posts talking about the Waymar -> Jon -> Sansa wildly in love -> Jonsa idea and love each and every one of them. I enjoy reading different takes on the same idea. It takes nothing away from those who have already made up their minds about what it means, and sometimes, the new post words things in a way that clicks with a new audience which is something we all should appreciate. It’s all upside imo!

#dot chat

[qqueenofhades]

Off the back of your other great politics/history posts, I was hoping to ask...do you have any insight or explanation into how the hell literal Nazis have had such a resurgence in recent years? I don’t even mean general right-wing or fascist bullshit - sadly we all know that some people have shitty shitty views - but *specifically* Nazism. As in, the Nazi imagery and ideology that every kid in the western world has been taught is Awful. Like, I know a lot of western countries didn’t care about what Nazi Germany was up to in the 1930s, which points to strains of lingering fascism around the world – but post-WW2 Nazi Germany has been the world’s definitive Bad Guy. As a Brit I’ve known kids in the *90’s* get bullied because ‘they’re from Germany and Germany was bad in the war’; from Casablanca to Indiana Jones to the Blues Brothers to Dad’s Army there are literally so many examples in popular culture of how Nazis are evil and stupid (not to mention the oft-quoted American phrase of ‘Europe would be speaking German if it weren’t for us’).

What I’m trying to get at is that throughout the late 20th century, western culture has overwhelmingly been Nazi Germany = Bad, Awful, Evil, Stupid, Had Their Asses Kicked Buncha Losers, and the Allies = Good For Standing Up To The Great Evil Thing (regardless of the nuances of historical reality). So how on earth have we reached a point where so many people see being The Evil Bastards Who Famously Lost as something appealing? And show off the Nazi tropes of as heil signs and swastikas, the most famous symbols of Bad Guys in, arguably, human history? And *then*, to top it all off, claim that they’re patriotically aligning with their countries' proud histories and traditional values...even though their countries famously fought against the people they're now emulating? How do you wrap your heads around the logical disconnect?

(apologies for the long ask, I’m just genuinely flummoxed. I can wrap my head around people falling into right-wing lines of thinking, horrible as that might be. but wanting to be seen as one of those Awful Bad Guys Who Then Were Humiliatingly Beaten Before The Entire World …how do you end up wanting that?)

As you point out, there is an enormous logical disconnect as to how you can end up wanting to associate yourselves with the most obviously Bad Guys Who Got Badly Beaten ever, but that is the poison of white supremacy for you. This mindset also still exists in America: whereas the Confederacy also only existed for five years, got its ass humiliatingly kicked, and lost, the very fact of them losing has been central to its continued mythologizing as the "Lost Cause." They were just innocent noble Southerners, they got mistreated by the evil Yankees, the very fact of them being oppressed by power shows that they didn't do anything wrong, etc etc. You can make endless excuses as to how the actual losing is a good thing, because it means the world wasn't ready for your noble virtues, so on and so forth. But as ever, it is virulent racism, and in the Nazis' case, the ability to so effectively weaponize and institutionalize that racism that they killed literally millions of people. The alt-right desires that same power and effectiveness, and they've been helped by the endless movies that show Nazis as maybe genocidal, but also cool, suave, effective, and fearsome. They want to emulate that general impression, more than being seen as the bunch of mean-spirited incel mass-shooter losers that they are.

Loathsome neo-Nazi toads like Nick Fuentes are also young, have no personal memory or attachment to WWII, and are coming from a generation of aggrieved young white men who are, for the first time, having to contend with the fact that they won't automatically get everything they want just by virtue of being white and male. They are easy to radicalize online, and are able to adopt the Nazi symbolism and mindset without having to seriously reckon with either what that meant or how it was defeated. It is also, as with the Confederacy, to strip any and all historical context from it and just treat it as the ideal institution to enact your beliefs (since after all, the Nazis WERE very good at killing people, even if nothing else). Likewise, their one and only goal is to "own the libs," and since they treat people's outrage over the Nazis as a signal that it's working, they align with the Nazis even more, just to be contrary.

Basically, as with the Confederacy, it's a project of massive historical revisionism and alternate memory, with racism (and the desire to effectively weaponize racism) at the core. They don't care about whether the actual Nazis lost, whether their own country fought against them, etc. It's an appealing way to be seen as "cool" and dangerous, to own the libs, and to effectively put their abhorrent views into practice, so they create a fantasy version of that identity and double down on it even harder every time they're challenged. Which is why we're now in this mess, so.... yeah.

#anonymous #ask #politics for ts #cw racism #cw white supremacy #history #history of racism