#like you bought it its ur fault

[androcola]

Imagine having the unmitigated gall to come into someone’s ask box and be like “just stop being poor and leave!!”

I KNOW!!!!! like buddy this is fucking tumblr I'm not looking for a financial advisor. this wasn't even about moving out in the first olace it was about my fucking mom 😭

#asks #anon #me: im just realky struggling rn cuz this is a really abusive situation and i wish i could leave... #some asswipe: actually its ur fault for ignoring opportunities (what opportunities exactly??) grow a spine you dirt sucking poor #likw what the fuck does Grow A Spine mean in this context anyway 😭 #like yeah i think homeless people need to grow a spine and stop complaining cuz theyre ignoring opportunities #definitely a republican argument. not to make it about politics but shiit. #sorry for being born into poverty??? from families systematically kept in poverty?? #and being alive during late stage capitalism???????????? where nothing is even remotely affordable???????????????? #they must have boomer parents who bought a house for one dime and a corn chip

[sweets4dolls]

Hii!! First of all, I luv ur work sm ur my fav writer on Tumblr <3

Can I request Vox with a fem s/o who kinda acts like Karen Smith from Mean Girls? Like, she's always pretty in pink, she's a ditzy blonde, ect. One day some weirdo hits on her, but she's clueless, and Vox gets a bit jealous..?

Tysm!! <333

pairing: vox + fem!bimbo!reader

content warnings: implied age gap, jealousy jealousy, smut, not proofread, innocence kink, dumbification?,

notes: I love me some bimbo readerrrr

vox loves to bring you to his business events, showing you off as the pretty little young thing on his side, all fresh and new to hell as you look around all wide-eyed with excitement at things which the average sinner would consider to be mundane.

with your youthful appearance matched with unparalleled naivety, its no surprise you didn't totally understand everything. so when a sinner hits on you at this new event vox has brought you too, you blindly engage, thinking its just harmless chit-chat and he's trying to be nice.

so when vox sees some stupid sinner hitting on his girl, eyeing her down in an outfit he bought for her, of course he's got to step in.

he comes in behind you, hearing you joyously babble about something random, hands moving rapidly to emphasize whatever it is you're saying as the sinner inches closer to you, looking you up and down.

"hi! perhaps you know me, vox, owner and creator of vox tech?" he cuts you off, false smile plastered to his screen as his hand reaches out to shake the sinner's, claws digging just so they bite their skin, as his other hand is placed on your thigh, rubbing the inner flesh of it in circles.

"oh! hi vox!" you say with that sweet, innocent smile as you lean into him, resting your head on his chest, making him smile cockily at the sinner as he places a sloppy, open mouthed kiss to your lips which you happily receive.

the sinner flushes, mumbling some apology and scurries away from the two of you, making you frown.

"let's go home, hm baby?" vox says as he watches you pout and push yourself off the chair. "yeah, okay," you say disappointedly, "why'd he run off like that? I thought he liked talking to me."

"oh he definetly liked you, don't worry babe," you frown, looking up at him with wide, confused bambi eyes. "I don't get it," you say, confused by the inflections in his voice paired with his words. "of course you wouldn't, because your my sweet, innocent little girl who doesn't know how hell works," he replies all patronizingly as he tugs you closer, gazing down at your furrowed brows and wide eyes.

once in the car, he just can't help himself from being a little bit more touchy with you, sitting you on his lap and playing with the locks of your hair as you squirm, legs occasionally kicking as he presses kisses over the chub of your cheeks and hands graze dangerously close to your panties under that short skirt you had worn out.

you lean into him as you chatter about random things with rapidity as he soaks in how cute you look as you run on in tangents. he sits, not really listening as he slides his hands beneath your panties, slowly massaging your clit. your breathe becomes heavier as you slump against vox even more. your hands wrap around his shoulders, clinging onto him as you try to remember what you were saying.

"and I..." you trail off, interrupted by your own mewls as vox furthers his advances, his fingers slipping into your tight warm cunt.

"mhm baby? what were you gonna say?" he says all mockingly as he pumps his fingers in and out of your pussy, prompting you to clench around him and let out blubbering moans. but its really your fault that he cut you off, your just such a pretty little thing sitting there like that! of course he has to touch you!

you hug onto him, whimpering, frame shaking as he fucks you with his fingers. "aw, I know pretty girl, feels so good, hm?" he says as he kisses at your neck, moving his hand that's in between your thighs faster as his thumb brushes over your clit.

your hips jolt, moving his fingers impossibly deeper into you prompting you to cum, making a mess all over his fingers and lap. he brings his hand to your mouth, smearing yourself over your lips as he presses at the small of your back to get you even closer to him.

"bet he couldn't make you feel this good," he murmurs, making your eyes widen and a smile spread across your lips, "that's what this was about?"

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel vox x reader #vox x reader #vox smut

[riaki]

hii! yk that trend on tiktok where the girl asks her man to name a woman and gets suspicious when he says a name beside hers? i would like to request that with gojo please! thanksss

name a woman | satoru gojo x f!reader thanks for ur req! here u go <3 slightly different from what u asked but i hope it works | cw fem reader + petnames, slightly suggestive, he's kinda a scumbag lol

it's a lazy saturday afternoon when you get betrayed by your boyfriend.

you're sitting at the round table on the patio of satoru's place; you always forget just how rich his parents are whenever you're around him. if not for that stupidly expensive cologne he wears and that one time you happened to see the price tag on the new pair of sunglasses he bought himself, you would've been blissfully unaware. after all, for a rich kid, he's pretty grounded. at least, when he isn't tooting his own horn.

but being here on the gojo estate, it hits you in the face like a ton of bricks; forces you to accept the fact that your boyfriend is loaded.

the breeze is gentle as it runs through your hair, but satoru's absentminded touch as he drums his fingers along your arm is more than you could ever ask for. it's the little things like this; habits of his that make you love him all the more. the way he'll throw his arms around your neck and latch onto to give you a big hug from behind, or carry you around like you're a little kid when you're worn out and you can't feel your feet from a day's worth of walking.

there's seven empty juice boxes littered across the table and a half-empty one in your hand; the paper straw is already folding in on itself, which makes it much harder to get any of the remnants at the bottom of the carton. at least the drink is nice and sweet; refreshing lime on a sunny day.

"why did they stop giving these things plastic straws? it's so soggy now," you complained, shifting in your seat as you shook the juice box. it did not relent, or give up any of its juice. you make a face, and you could swear it makes one back.

satoru glances up at you, tearing his attention away from his phone as a small grin appears on his lips. "don't you know? it's good for the environment. obviously, you're not in tune with nature like i am." he snickers, adjusting his shades on the bridge of his nose before turning his attention back to the screen between his fingers, withdrawing the hand that was on your arm to form a cushion for his chin on the crook of his elbow.

"oh, [name], [name]! you're hurting us! woe be upon thy and thou foul plastic tomfoolery." your dignified lover puts his phone down, straightening up to wave his arms about as if he's one of those inflatables you see in front of car dealerships. you think he's trying to be a tree, but you're not entirely sure. "hear that? the plants are calling you," he grins, pausing his arm waves to nudge you in the shoulder.

"stop doing that, satoru. you look stupid. the maids will think you've lost it," you chuckled, kicking his leg in jest as you leaned back in your seat and took another sip from the juice box.

"you're one to talk." he scoffs, and you glare at him, giving him a pointed look. he just giggles, sticking his tongue out before making a grab at your juice box. you swipe it out of his reach before he can wiggle his fingers any closer, and the way his expression falls an apple from a tree makes a laugh bubble from your throat. unlike the apple, it's not gravity that's pulled him down; you never indulge him, because you like making him chase. he enjoys it— he thinks it's good that you're playful. but it's annoying when he's thirsty and it's not his fault those juice boxes are so damn small.

"toru, i have a question for you. answer well and the rest of this is yours," you said, shifting in your seat to cross your legs and face him, propping the juice box on your knee. there's not much inside, but you know he'll scavenge for every last drop, like he's some raccoon. it's cute, you think.

he perks up immediately, turning his phone off and mirroring your position in his own seat; his limbs are slightly too long and too lanky to fit proportionately in the seat, but he doesn't seem to mind when his knee bumps against yours.

"yes? what is it, my sweetpea?" he grins, enjoying the sour expression on your face. it seems the lime juice has worked its way into your system.

you scowl. "sweetpea? what kind of nickname is that?" it's cute, though, so you don't say anything more. you stare at him for a moment, taking in his features; the wide smirk on his lips, the way his hair gently ruffles around his face like passing clouds.

you sigh; resigned, as you roll your eyes.

"name a woman."

"...what?"

he tilts his head to the side, staring at you through his lashes, an inquisitive squint that makes him look a lot like a white cat.

you laugh a little, and his grin widens. "you heard me. name a woman. any; the first that comes to your mind."

he hums in acknowledgement, making a show out of tapping his chin with a finger in deep thought, a mock pensive expression twisting his lips down before he looks at you again, a teasing glint in his azure eyes that gives you a terrible sense of foreboding.

"kuroki meisa."

...

now it's your turn to ask. "what?"

he shrugs, a shit-eating grin on his face yet again as he tilts his shades down to give you a look that he knows will get you bothered.

"you heard me, princess. i named a woman. the first that comes to my brilliant mind, right? now how about giving me that juice box—" he starts, reaching forward and leaning in his seat to make another grab at the box perched on your knee. you yank it away from him just in time; his fists close around cool air and he groans loudly.

"you're no fun." he pouts, biting the inside of his cheek.

"satoru! who the hell is kuroki meisa? you were supposed to say me! or your mom, at least. or shoko." you glared at him, turning your nose up and refusing to acknowledge him as he pouts and crosses his arms over his chest like some petulant child who got his ipad confiscated.

"i did what you told me to do! you can't be mad at me for that." he protests, squirming in his seat.

a lightbulb goes off in your head; normally, that'd be a good thing, but the way you're gritting your teeth so hard he thinks your jaw might crack doesn't bode well. "wait, don't tell me. is she another one of those models? satoru, i swear—" you start, but he cuts you off hastily, making a mad grab at the juice box and coming out successful and surprisingly unscathed.

"she is." he says sheepishly, toying with the sad paper straw before attempting to take a sip. he struggles, but eventually you hear the tell tale sign of liquid moving up the hollow straw. you're too busy seething to notice, though.

"gojo." you say his surname, and he flinches a little, an overwhelming sense of icy dread sinking its claws into his shoulders as his grin turns into one of nervous panic. it's familiar; the one he experienced when you'd found one of your missing bras in the drawer compartment underneath his king sized mattress (that he always complains about feeling ten times emptier without you in it).

"yes, my sweet?" satoru's about to face you when something hits him square in the face— with all malicious intent and cutting cardboard corners. seven juice boxes on the table plus one half-filled one has now become six on the table, a half-filled in his hand, and another on the floor. you're glaring daggers at him, still posed to strike in your chair. he rubs his cheek, grinding his teeth together and grumbling before he looks at you again with an extremely disappointed expression on his face. "the plants, baby! if they didn't already dislike you, they sure do now." he huffs. but with the way you're looking at him, he wouldn't put it past you to throw the table at him next.

"give me my juice box back, you brat." you hiss, and he laughs, staring down at you like you're some cute little zoo animal. he wants to dote on you; he can't help it! you're so adorable, with your cheeks all red and your bottom lip sticking out in a little endearing pout. he wants nothing more than to drop the juice box, drag you onto his lap and squish your pretty face until you start complaining and stop him with a kiss.

satoru knows he won't get anywhere if you're still pissed at him, though, so he at least has to try and make amends.

"aww, don't worry, baby! you're the only woman i think of when i—"

"that's enough out of you, traitor."

satoru just grins and finishes off the juice box, relishing in the look of mild anguish on your face as you watch the cardboard crinkle inward like some black hole sucked it in; a telltale sign of what was half-filled a moment ago becoming completely empty; a dry well that was once your reservoir of life. you retreat back into your seat, hugging your knees to your chest and putting on your best, heart-tugging frown. it doesn't take long for satoru to notice when you do, and he immediately melts, tossing the juice box aside to the poor plants and leaning forward to cup your cheek in his palm.

"what's wrong, love? you know i only did it to see you upset," he chuckles, and you can't help but smile before remembering you're supposed to be pissed.

"that was the last juice box, satoru. and i'm still thirsty. and a little hungry." you sighed, rubbing your forehead. you felt a little guilty. "but it's okay."

satoru sighs, before pulling away and standing up, stretching his arms and cracking his back with exaggerated movements, like he's making letters out of his body.

"alr-ight! up with you, then. let's go to the market." he grins, lending you a hand and nudging your foot with his. you stare up at him with those sweet big eyes, and he feels himself melt a little.

"are you sure? they're expensive—“

"shut it, sweetpea. it's all on me. how does katsu sound?"

your face lights up, and so does his. after all, he'd do anything for his sweet girl— no model could ever compare to the very sun of his life; the brightest star in his sky.

not proofread i hope we’re not surprised my (riaki) stuff. don't repost and/or plagiarize !

#in other news would you rather be the city or country mouse #waht if i died #i feel like i make these analogies taht aren't written cohesively so no one knows wtf im talking ab #its ok i speak my own lanaguage 👨‍🍳 #the langauage of typos apparently #its oakgy #gojo satoru x reader #jjk x reader #billet-doux #inbox 💌 #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x y/n #satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #satoru gojo x y/n #satoru x reader #satoru x you #gojo x you #gojo fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #satoru gojo #jjk #why are there so many gojo tags i am TIRED

[sanjisboyfie]

one piece smau: dating zoro edition

- slight nsfw images + wording , very slight

- male reader !!

liked by freeluffy, SUPERCOLA, and 10k others

rzs.[name]: muah smooch kiss 😚

tagged: [name]s_hubby

[name]s_hubby: i love u pretty boy

-> rzs.[name]: come home imy

-> [name]s_hubby: im gettin ur stupid biggie bag wait a second

dni_nami: STOP BEING HAPPY ON MY TL ‼️‼️‼️ I DIDNT ASK FOR TS esp from u two

-> rzs.[name]: btw nami i jus venmoed u for the snacks u bought for us at the movies

-> dni_nami: i wish u both nothing but happiness 🫶🏼 love u botthhhh

uso_pp: damn why he eatin u ... [name] u good??

-> [name]s_hubby: pls stfu u touch deprived idiot

liked by purrrona, rzs.[name], and 11k others

[name]s_hubby: why r ppl spelling gym "jim" that shit sound stupid as fuck

tagged: rzs.[name]

rzs.[name]: my favorite pillow <333

rzs.[name]: guys do u see how he tagged me :))) its cuz hes my boyfriend

rzs.[name]: pls tell me ur single plsplsplsplsplsplsplsplspl

-> [name]s_hubby: i almost blocked u bc i thought u were a rando

-> uso_pp: smths tellin me this isnt the right answer ???

-> [name]s_hubby: mb i mean, yes i do have a boyfriend and am happily married to him

freeluffy: ZORO i beat ur pr 😈😈

-> [name]s_hubby: mf i know u didnt stop lying

princesanji: vomitted in my mouth xoxo

-> [name]s_hubby: the jealousy from this comment is crazy

liked by [name]s_hubby, princesanji, and 10k others

rzs.[name]: HES SOOOOO HOTTTT I MIGHT JUST START DROOLING

tagged: [name]s_hubby

[name]s_hubby: please do not start drooling i might break up w u

-> rzs.[name]: u practically started crying when i told u i had to leave the bed to go to school , i cant even jmagine if i broke up w you

-> uso_pp: his ass is not built to survive without u [name] pls dont break up w him for the sake of everyone else

randomgirl: happy for u ig ...

-> [name]s_hubby: im gonna block u from [name]s phone cuz hes too nice to do it himself foh w ur bullshit

[liked by dni_nami, robinkills, and 100 others]

johnnybro: BIG BRO ZORO GOT THE CUTEST BOYFRIEND EVER

-> rzs.[name]: JOHNNNNYY zoro says he misses u

-> [name]s_hubby: i didnt but good to hear from u johnny and yes my bf is the cutest

liked by rzs.[name], [name]s_hubby, and 9k others

SUPERCOLA: zoros drunk ass couldnt even stand upright and [name] had to go on over there to sober him up

tagged: rzs.[name] and [name]s_hubby

robinkills: what even got him to come back to his senses? he was so drunk

-> rzs.[name]: i told him he would have to sleep on the couch unless he got serious

[liked by dni_nami, princesanji, and 57 others]

-> dni_nami: thats all it took??? wtf 💀💀💀

freeluffy: zoro is so funny 😂😂😂 he kept bumping into poles ans apologizing to them

-> [name]s_hubby: luffy delete this comment rn u have ten minutes.

rzs.[name]: i love my boyfriend 😇 even if hes so fucking stupid

-> SUPERCOLA: pls do NOT start beef in my comment section i was tryna show how cut u guys r as a couple not how stupid u both are

liked by rzs.[name], princesanji, and 17k others

[name]s_hubby: one day ill put a proper ring on his finger and then MAYBE just maybe bitches will stop tryna slide in his dms

tagged: rzs.[name]

uso_pp: it was cute until u threatened a whole population of people

-> [name]s_hubby: the issue is that theres a whole population of people tryna get w my bf, thats not my fault

dni_nami: zoro u almost had me fooled that u were being a SWEET bf for once

rzs.[name]: why not rn???

-> [name]s_hubby: shhh

princesanji: the caption couldve been smth great and then u ruined it

-> [name]s_hubby: and ur still single. so...

liked by dni_nami, [name]s_hubby, and 12k others

rzs.[name]: i was told to make it more obvious on my acc that i have a bf (even tho hes in all my posts) so pls stop dming me now ty

tagged: [name]s_hubby

[name]s_hubby: his username is literally "roronoa zoro's [name]" as in - IM RORONOA ZORO ... i need all of u to wake tf up

-> rzs.[name]: and my man!!! thank u to my man!!

dni_nami: if anyone knew u two in real life theyd know all u do is talk abt each other

uso_pp: the world if ppl were able to take a hint🌈✨✌️☮️🕊️

princesanji: i am begging all of u to actually stop dming [name] bc the amt of ppl is genuinely stressing zoro out and its making him act even more like an asshole to the rest of us. please spare us this treatment and leave them both alone

[liked by [name]s_hubby, rzs.name, and 120 others]

rzs.[name]'s story:

happy 2 yr anniversary, im so lucky to have you in my life

[name]s_hubby replied to your story: i hope i get to wake up next to you everyday, i love you so much please come home quick so i can show you pretty boy <3

#≡;- ꒰ ° smau series ꒱ #one piece smau #one piece imagines #one piece x reader #one piece x male reader #zoro x reader #zoro x male reader #roronoa zoro x male reader #x male reader #zoro smau #roronoa zoro smau #zoro imagines #male reader #male reader imagines #modern one piece #roronoa zoro imagines #x reader

[stevie-petey]

episode four: the body

For the second time within a week, Steve Harrington almost kills you with his stupid BMW. Granted, the first time wasn’t necessarily his fault due to your crying, but this time just felt personal.  “Hey! Henderson!” “Jesus christ-” You’re biking to the Wheeler’s, lost in thought as the sun begins to set, when stupid Harrington scares the shit out of you.  His unexpected shouting causes you to swerve your bike towards his car and he has to slam on his brakes to avoid hitting you.  “Do you, like, have a fantasy about me hitting you with my car?”

summary: you basically have a "no babe don't cry over ur dead brother ur so sexy" moment with jonathan, hopper plays mr love doctor (cute date idea: coffin shopping), and somehow nancy wheeler makes you realize that you're a horrible babysitter and an even bigger idiot. meanwhile: steve harrington is frustratingly charming.

rating: general but plenty of cursing as usual.

warnings: cursing, fem!reader, and use of y/n.

words: 8k

before you swing in: hello ! happy eve of a spending time with loved ones, however ya choose to celebrate or not celebrate and all that jazz. i hope y'all are well and doing okay :) a LOT happens in this chapter, so buckle up. so many feelings and revelations my god. also this chapter is one i really loved writing purely because i got to explore more of steve and reader so ,,, ya welcome ! (hopefully i was able to clear up jonathans thoughts and how he processes, i really want it to come across as someone hurt and overwhelmed rather than just him being cranky lmao). anyways, enjoy !!

-

It’s a quiet morning.

You roll over, the sunlight streaming through your curtains, and for a moment you forget. It’s a blissful moment, sweet naivety that strokes your cheek and coaxes your eyes open. As you throw your arms over your head and stretch, last night’s events haven’t caught up to you quite yet. 

Then you feel Jonathan’s body next to yours and for a moment you’re confused. He never sleeps in your bed whenever he spends the night, being ever the gentleman. No matter how many times you offer, he always insists on respecting your mother’s wishes and sleeping on the giant beanbag chair within your room, and it always makes your heart warm. 

Your mother had specifically bought the beanbag for Jonathan when you were thirteen. He had been spending more and more nights at your home, sneaking in through your window to avoid his parents fighting. At first he would simply fall asleep on your carpet, despite your many reassurances that he could sleep in your bed, so when your mom unexpectedly barged into your room one morning and saw him lying face down on the ground, she freaked. 

Once you had explained everything to her (with Jonathan’s permission), she had shoved you guys into her car, dropped him off at his house, and then found the beanbag at a garage sale for $10. 

“This way, he’ll have a place to sleep that’s soft and cozy, away from my young daughter,” she had said during the drive home. You had covered your face in embarrassment at her implication, but you were also incredibly proud to call her your mom at that moment. She may be overbearing at times, but she was the kindest woman you’ve ever met. 

You rub your eyes and glance at the bean bag that sits between your bed and wall, its dusty blue color almost glowing in the early morning light. Then you glance at Jonathan, who has woken up before you, and notice the redness in his eyes and the dark circles now darker than ever. 

Then it all comes rushing back to you. 

Will’s body in the quarry. 

Holding your brother as he mourned his friend. 

El, so quiet and shy and sweet, running away after your cruel dismissal. 

Jonathan showing up to your window hours later, broken and devastated. 

Then, late into the night, the two of you falling asleep, side by side in your bed, both needing each other more than ever before. 

The two of you get ready without saying anything. You hand Jonathan some spare clothes of his that you keep in a drawer before giving him some space as you go and take a shower. You spend longer than usual getting ready, but you pay no attention to the clock. There’s no way you’re going to school today. You’re not leaving Jonathan alone for even a second. 

Jonathan finishes getting ready before you do and waits in your room. Neither of you have said anything yet, last night being too fresh in your memories, but words aren’t needed between the two of you. 

You take his hand and lead him into your kitchen and wordlessly hand him a banana. He stares at you, and you stare back, silently challenging him to decline the food. He needs to eat. You’ve noticed how thin he’s gotten with everything happening. 

He sighs, knowing he won’t win this fight, and takes a bite out of the banana in a mocking manner, but you’re just relieved he’s eating. 

You grab your own breakfast before writing a note for your mom, informing her that you’ll be with Jonathan today and promising to make up any missed assignments as soon as you can. Then you quietly go into Dustin’s room to check up on him, but his bed is empty. You glance at his alarm clock and note the early hour, he doesn’t normally leave for school for another thirty minutes, which makes you frown. 

Where the hell did the kid run off to?

An uneasy feeling settles over you, but you don’t have time to question anything. Knowing Dustin, he ran off to school earlier than usual to see his friends and distract himself from last night. While your mom offered you both to stay home for the rest of the week due to Will’s death, neither of you have ever been good at staying put and dealing with your emotions.

Wherever your brother is, you know he needs his space.

Once everything is settled, you join Jonathan in his car and drive to his place. While he never explicitly asked you to this morning, you know that you’re going to his house with him to help him deal with his mother and the funeral preparations. 

He doesn’t have to ask, and you don’t have to tell him that you’ll help. 

You both just know. 

About halfway to his place, Jonathan finally speaks. 

“The cops say that Will crashed his bike and fell into the quarry,”

“Jonathan, we don’t have to talk about it right now-”

“My mom doesn’t believe that he’s dead. She-she insists that he’s in the walls, that he can speak through-through… Christmas lights.”

His voice shakes as he speaks, and you can’t tell if it’s due to grief or anger. 

“Will is dead and my mom chooses to believe that there’s some monster in our walls that took him.”

“A monster?” you think about El and her powers and the fear on the boys’ faces when she pulled out the Demogorgon piece. Then you remember the other night at the Byers’ home when Joyce came running outside as the lights were flickering wildly. Her fear had been genuine. 

“A fucking monster that’s hiding in our walls. She wouldn’t… she wouldn’t listen, Y/N. I tried talking to her, to calm her down, but she just…” His words fade off, and he clenches his jaw as tightens his hands around the steering wheel. 

You’re not sure what to say. It’s a tough situation, a fucking heartbreaking one, and it’s all so unfair. Jonathan needs his mom, but his mom needs Will. 

You rest your hand behind his head and allow your fingers to rub circles against his skin. He leans into your touch, and for now this is all you can do. 

The state of the Byers’ home has only gotten worse since the last time you were there. There’s now letters painted on the wall and string lights placed all throughout the house. There’s also clothes in random corners and trash thrown around. 

Jonathan had been staying in this house alone, watching his mother spiral. Your stomach twists with guilt. 

You should’ve been there more for him, but instead you allowed your petty need to help everyone distract you from what’s important. 

Joyce is passed out on the couch with an ax clutched between her hands, which breaks your heart even more. Jonathan walks over to wake her up and you give the two of them some privacy as you head into the kitchen to make Joyce some breakfast. 

Their fridge is barren, but you aren’t surprised. You make do with the few eggs you find and get to work; it isn’t much, but it’ll have to do. As you prepare breakfast, you notice a stack of Will’s drawings on the kitchen table, which causes you to gag with remorse. 

There’s still so much of Will within these walls, his entire childhood still locked inside, untouched, and yet the house lacks his presence. 

He’s gone. 

– 

You wait with Hopper in the morgue waiting room, nervously tapping your foot and frantically trying to distract yourself with a comic. The words blur together in your head and the images float around. You can’t focus on anything. For once, Spidey’s quips and banter can’t distract you from reality. 

Not only are you incredibly worried for Joyce and Jonathan, but the thought of Will’s body being a wall away from you sends chills down your spine. You can’t imagine what’s happening behind the doors, and you’re secretly relieved that you’ll never know. 

“What’s taking so long?” Hopper’s voice breaks you from your thoughts.

You put your comic down and listen, figuring that it’s best if you’re caught up on everything so that you can store away any useful information for later. 

The front desk lady sighs. “Well, everything’s been a bit chaotic around here without Gary.”

This catches Hopper’s attention. “Without Gary?”

“I thought you knew. Those men from State, they… they sent Gary home last night.”

Now this catches your attention. Why would the State replace the town’s coroner? 

“So who did the autopsy?” 

“Someone from State.” 

Hopper looks at you, almost as if to ask if you’re also hearing this, and you give him a slight nod. It’s odd, really damn odd. 

“Why would they send someone for a little boy?” You ask Hopper, but he only shakes his head in response. 

In the back of your mind, you think about what El had warned you of. The bad men, the people she has to hide from… it didn’t make sense at the time, but now…

Your thoughts are cut off as Jonathan runs out the door, his hand over his mouth, and you immediately get up to help him outside. He throws up against the wall outside, and you wince at the smell. You’ve never been good with people getting sick, but Jonathan needs you right now, so you rub soothing circles on his back as he throws up. Once he’s done, you head back inside and wait for Joyce. 

You offer Jonathan a tissue before coaxing him to rest his head on your shoulder. Having nothing else to do, yet urgently wanting to help, you begin to read him some panels from your comic. He doesn’t say anything, so you take it as a sign to keep going. Your voice is hoarse from all your crying, but you read aloud anyways. 

Hopper watches your interaction with a small interest. You don’t notice his curious eyes and the way they seem to glint with sincerity. In his eyes, the two of you will get together soon enough. 

After a couple minutes, Hopper finally asks Jonathan how Joyce is holding up. The boy straightens up, but grabs your hand to steady himself, and responds as best as he can. He explains the lights, the letters on the wall, everything. 

“She’s had anxiety problems in the past, but this…? I don’t know.” He takes a shaky breath, and you draw reassuring patterns on the back of his hand. “I’m worried it could be… god, I don’t know.”

“She’s grieving,” you remind him, and he nods. 

“Yeah, she’s grieving, but she’ll be okay. We’ll be okay; my mom, she’s tough.”

“Like Spider-Man,” you say, though you don’t really mean to. You’re tired and the words just slip out, but Jonathan begins to laugh. 

“Yeah, like Spider-Man, you’re right. Thanks, bug.” 

“Anytime, bee.” 

Jonathan smiles at you, still softly laughing, and it’s then that you realize. He hasn’t laughed in days, he’s hardly even smiled, and yet here he is, smiling at the stupid nickname you gave him and laughing at the stupid joke you didn’t even mean to say; you realize you’d do anything to get him to laugh again, to give you that smile that he’s only ever reserved for you. He squeezes your hand and his eyes shine for a moment with a familiar warmness that has always made you weak. 

It hits you like a cold, cruel wave on a harsh winter day. 

You’re in love with Jonathan. 

Fuck.

It’s horrible timing, and you feel sick with guilt for realizing that you love your best friend merely hours after his brother has died, but now it’s all you can think about. 

You love him, you love him more than you’ve ever loved anything before, but you can’t tell him. It wouldn’t be fair, and you don’t have the time. 

You’re thankful when Hopper begins to talk again, reiterating that Joyce is tough, so that you have the time to process your newfound feelings. 

Then Joyce comes crashing through the door, screaming about how whatever is in the other room isn’t Will, ignoring everyone who tells her to calm down. Both you and Jonathan stand up to calm her down, your comic dropping to the ground in the process, but she doesn’t listen and instead runs outside. 

“Mom!” Jonathan follows after her. 

You sigh and tuck your hair behind your ears before picking up the comic. You know that Jonathan needs to be alone with Joyce right now, give them some privacy, it’s a personal matter. More personal than anything else, and yet you also selfishly don’t want to be near him for a few moments so you can collect yourself as well. 

As you’re gathering your things, Hopper clears his throat. 

“Do you love him?”

You freeze, having not expected such a personal question. You’ve only just realized your feelings for him, how the hell has Hopper already figured it out? “What does it matter? His brother is dead and his mom is losing it.”

Hopper rubs his hand over his face, giving you a warning look. “But do you love the kid?”

It’s the way he says it, like it means life or death, that has you respond, “I do.”

“Take care of him, then.” He looks you in the eyes as he says it, urging you to understand the weight of his words, and you do. 

You’ve heard about how his daughter had died and his wife divorced him soon after. They’d only ever been rumors to you, but now you know that they’re true. He’s telling you to take care of Jonathan, that your love for him means that you have to take care of him in a way that no one else can. 

In a way, you suppose that you and Hopper aren’t so different after all, and you gain a new sense of respect for the man. 

You swallow deeply and nod at him before excusing yourself to follow after Jonathan and Joyce. 

– 

The mother and son in question are a few blocks down the street, Joyce waving her son away as he follows her with the car. 

You sigh. 

This day definitely sucks. 

Running up to them is a pain in the ass, honestly. You get that you gave them some privacy, but damn. Did Jonathan seriously have to take the car as well? 

When you finally catch up, he’s parking. “Hey, what are you-” 

He doesn’t spare you a glance as he turns the engine off and runs after his mom. 

“Seriously?” You groan, clutching at a stitch in your side from running. Usually you’re a great runner, actually choosing to go for a run whenever you’re particularly stressed out or anxious. However with the shitshow that this week has been, you haven’t gone on your morning run in a while and you’re starting to feel the effects of being out of practice. 

Joyce, being surprisingly fast, is hard to catch up with, but you do your best as Jonathan sprints ahead of you. When he finally reaches her, he grabs at her jacket with a determined look in his eyes. 

You hang back, now regretting the fact that you left the coroner’s office in the first place. 

“Mom, stop!” 

“Just go home, Jonathan.”

“No, this is not an okay time for you to shut down.”

“Shut down… what-” The confusion in Joyce’s eyes is enough to make you feel Jonathan’s frustration as well. You feel for the woman, you really do, but she has another son to worry about. Jonathan is still here, he’s lost his own baby brother, he needs his mom now more than ever.

But Joyce, too lost in her own grief and desperation, can’t see that. 

“We have to deal with this, mom. We have to deal with the funeral!” You’ve never heard Jonathan raise his voice at his mom before, but after days of begging for her attention, you’re proud of him for defending himself.

The word “funeral” seems to snap Joyce out of her daze and once again she goes on her tangent about how Will’s body isn’t really back at the morgue, that he’s still alive, and Jonathan’s anger in his voice makes you ache. 

As he and his mom continue to yell at one another, a few nosy people in the town area stand and watch. They whisper to each other, no doubt about how Will’s death has made Joyce Byers crazy, and you kick a few rocks at them. 

“Fuck off! At least pretend that you aren’t a bunch of nosy assholes like most decent people do.” A woman sneers at you, but you wave your arms above your head, “Oh! Scary! Get fucked!” 

Eventually they do as they’re told and walk away from the screaming mother and son, which pleases you. 

You really hope that random lady wasn’t a patron of Bookstrordinary though. 

“Yeah, well, while you’re talking to the lights, Y/N and I will be planning a funeral for Will!” Jonathan’s voice is laced with bitterness as he screams at his mother, breaking your heart even more. “I’m not letting him sit in that freezer another day!” 

Joyce storms off, but you notice that her shoulders shake with tears as she leaves. 

It’s such a devastating situation, and while you’re also frustrated with the way she’s been treating Jonathan, you also know that maybe her craziness isn’t exactly “crazy”. El is still out there, even if you’re not sure where, and you think about how she was able to control the comic book and the game pieces. The static electricity you felt in the air when she used her powers, the same static you felt at the Byers’ home a few nights ago when Joyce came running outside with the lights flashing and Will’s song playing on the radio.

But then you think about how El promised that Will was alive. 

He isn’t; you see his dead body every time you close your eyes. 

So really, what is there to believe?

Lost in thought, you don’t notice Jonathan walking towards you until he grasps at your arm and flings you along back to the car with him. He’s breathing heavily and you notice that he’s shaking. He’s in no condition to drive. 

As you near the car you quickly reach around and grab his keys from his pocket before running over to the driver’s side and throwing yourself into the seat. Jonathan hates when you drive the car, not because you’re a bad driver, but because some part of him truly believes it’s impolite to make a girl drive. 

As cute as you think his chivalry is, today you couldn’t give more of a damn. 

Jonathan stands outside your door. “Y/N-”

“Nope, no time to argue, Byers. Get in.” 

“But-” 

“In.”

He does as he’s told, albeit with some attitude, but eventually the two of you are off. Without having to ask, you drive to the local funeral home. While you and Jonathan are similar in many ways, the one thing that pulls you together is planning. You both cling onto the stability that planning provides, and right now Jonathan is clinging onto his responsibilities for Will’s funeral.

Like he told his mom earlier, you and him have a funeral to plan. 

The funeral home is closer to the edge of Hawkins, so the drive is a longer one. Along the way Jonathan slowly begins to calm down, untensing his shoulders and releasing his clenched jaw. You let him take all the time he needs, thankful that for now you have some time to yourself to reflect over today’s revelation.

You love Jonathan. 

Those three words are heavy within your chest, and you almost don’t want to think about them, but you know that sooner or later you’ll have to. You glance at Jonathan, the late fall sun casts a warm glow on his face that for a brief moment brings back the boy you knew only a week ago, before everything changed. Then he turns to face you and you see the red in his eyes, his cheeks sunken in, and you know that you don’t have the time to unravel whatever you feel for him. 

He needs his best friend right now.

Jonathan’s voice breaks you from your thoughts, his voice cracking a bit from disuse. “Can we talk about yesterday?” 

You cast him a quick glance. “Yesterday?”

“Our… our fight, I guess.” 

“Oh,” you shift your hands on the steering wheel, now suddenly painfully aware of the silence within the car. “We don’t have to right now, bee. We should be focusing on the funeral arrangements.” 

Your voice catches on the word “funeral”, it still hasn’t sunk in yet that Will is really gone. 

“Bug, for the past eighteen hours all I’ve been thinking about is Will,” he takes a shaky breath and you gently place a hand on his, encouraging him to keep talking, “but when I’m not thinking about him… I’m thinking about you and what-what you said yesterday.” 

“I said a lot yesterday-” 

Jonathan gives you a pleading look. “Please just let me get this out, okay?”

You purse your lips but remain silent. 

“I will never, ever deserve you. This week and my actions have proven that. This isn’t some pathetic attempt to make you pity me, I was an asshole to you and I recognize that. You love people in a way that terrifies me, Y/N. You’re my best friend and I think I would actually die if I ever lost you.”

A snort escapes your lips, “you probably would.”

“I definitely would, but this isn’t about me. I’m so, so sorry for how I’ve been treating you lately and the fact that you’re driving me to a funeral home after watching my mom have a meltdown in the town square without even batting an eye is all the more proof that you’re too good for me.” 

“I wouldn’t say too good, but yeah. Close enough.”

“It’s more than enough, bug. That’s what terrifies me: I’m afraid that I’ll never be able to repay you for all that you’ve done for me, even before Will disappeared; you’ve been taking care of me since we were twelve.”

His words hang in the air as you allow them to wash over you. There’s so much you want to disagree with, namely the fact that he doesn't deserve you, but you know that he wouldn’t want to hear your arguments. 

Again you think about how similar the two of you are, and while you both give your all to the people that you love, your love comes freely while Jonathan has grown up believing that it comes with conditions. It’s never been a problem in your relationship until now, but you guess with how much you’ve been overcompensating for everything, the need to return it all has caught up with him. 

Finally, you speak. “You feel that you can’t accept my help because I’ve already done enough for you. Is that it?”

“Yeah,” Jonathan takes a deep breath. “I know it’s stupid, especially because I’m asking for your help right now with the funeral preparations, but…”

“I understand, but we’ll get through it,” you pull into the funeral home parking lot and turn the car off. “We always do, right?” 

“Right,” Jonathan’s smile is a weak one, but you accept it nonetheless. 

“Now, you ready to go look at children’s coffins like real men and women do?” 

He laughs at your poor attempt at a joke, but even he can admit that objectively the entire situation is morbid. “Only real best friends go coffin shopping together.” 

“My thoughts exactly, good sir.” Then, before you forget, you reach over and whack Jonathan’s head with the back of your hand. 

“Ow! What was that for?”

You shrug your shoulders, “ask Nancy.”

And with that, you unbuckle your seatbelt and head into the funeral home, trusting that Jonathan will follow eventually enough. Things aren’t exactly the same between the two of you, especially with your newfound feelings for him, but it’s a start. 

“I deserved that,�� you hear Jonathan grumble, which makes you smile. 

You’ll take whatever you can get.

– 

You spot Nancy before Jonathan does. 

It wasn’t intentional, really, but the funeral home director was droning on and on about the different wood selections for coffins and finishes that you can customize and it all makes you want to throw up; the coffins before you are so small, you weren't really paying attention in the first place. 

She stands in the doorway and motions for you to get Jonathan’s attention, who is deeply focused on everything the old man is saying. A part of you wants to ignore the girl, but the scared look on her face tells you that this is something serious. 

You nudge your shoulder against Jonathan’s and point at Nancy; he excuses the two of you as you walk towards her. 

Jonathan shoves his hands in his pockets, a bit guarded. “Hey,”

“Hey, your mom, um… said you’d be here.” 

“You talked to Mrs. Byers?” You ask, feeling a sudden possessiveness over the woman. Sure, you were kind of okay sharing Jonathan with Nancy so long as she was with Harrington, but Joyce? She’s like a second mother to you.

It made you uneasy that Joyce even talked to her in the first place. 

Nancy tilts her head at you. “Yeah, it was only for a brief moment though. She seemed pretty… distracted.” 

“No shit. Her son died, Nancy.” 

The girl flinches a bit at your tone, which causes Jonathan to yank at your sleeve and shove you behind him. “Ignore her, we’ve had… Well, it’s been a long day.” 

You feel your shoulders drop and unclench your fists. “Sorry, is everything okay? Is it the boys?”

“No, they’re fine, I just,” Nancy’s eyes shoot towards you, uncertain, before directing them towards Jonathan. “Can we talk for a second?”

The photos Nancy shows you makes your blood run cold. They start with Barb sitting alone by the pool, but slowly she pulls out more and more pieces of the torn picture to create a terrifying image with a shadow-like figure looming over her friend. 

Jonathan tries to sum the shadow up to lens distortion, but you know that he’s wrong. Nancy asks more questions, trying to figure out exactly what has happened to Barb, but all you can think about is El. 

You check the time on your watch and curse. It’s late afternoon now, you’ve been gone with Jonathan since early this morning. Dustin hadn’t been in his room when you left and you stupidly assumed that he’d gone off to school. Now, seeing the picture of Barb and that thing… Something is so goddamn wrong. 

“The cops think that she ran away,” Nancy says. 

“Just like they did with Will,” you’re whispering more to yourself than to them, but Jonathan hears you anyway. 

“Maybe she did run away-” 

Nancy shakes her head. “No, she wouldn’t do that. They don’t know Barb. When I went back to Steve’s… I thought I saw something.”

Your head shoots up. “Nancy, what did you see?”

“Some weird man,” the urgence in your voice confuses the girl, but you silently push her to keep talking, “or… I don’t know what it was.”

Both you and Jonathan are quiet afterwards for very different reasons. 

He’s quiet because he probably thinks Nancy is crazy, just like his mom. 

You’re quiet because you’re currently afraid you’ve accidentally left your idiotic brother and his friends and El alone with very real monsters and possible bad men. The figure Nancy saw… El being terrified of bad people finding and hurting her…

Well shit. 

“I’m sorry, I-I shouldn’t have come here today-”

You stop Nancy from leaving. “No, you should stay… I think,” you look at Jonathan, nervous for how he may react to what you’re about to say. “I think I might have an idea of what you saw last night. A lot has happened since Will disappeared, things that I’m still trying to understand, but I think I know where to start finding an explanation.” 

Jonathan turns to you. “What? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Technically I did try telling you a few nights ago but then you yelled at me and threw a jacket at my face-” 

“You threw a jacket at Y/N?” Nancy asks, which you and Jonathan ignore. 

“But for now I can’t tell you anything else. I made a promise, and I’m not sure I’m right or even sane for considering it an explanation, but we need to leave. Now.”

“A promise? To who?” There’s an edge of hurt in Jonathan’s voice and you desperately wish you could explain more to him, but now isn’t the time. Not with Nancy sitting between you two and her own brother involved. You don’t want to cause any unnecessary worry for her; right now she needs to focus on Barb. You’ll wrangle in the boys, it’s your fault they’re even alone right now with El.

“I can’t exactly say who, but just trust me, okay? Again: I really hope I’m just insane and worried about nothing and that this will all be an embarrassing laugh for us later.”

“Y/N-”

“Jonathan, we need to go.” 

“‘We’?” Nancy now speaks up, seemingly fed up by your vague exchange with Jonathan.

You try to collect yourself and pretend like you have some amazing plan. “Yes, we. Jonathan will take you to the photo developing room at school and see if you can make the pictures clearer. On the way there, he’ll drop me off at home so I can grab my bike and head out.”

“And what will you be doing?” The boy asks.

“Tracking down my brother, unfortunately.” 

He gives you a doubtful look. “C’mon, you can’t expect me to just let you run off on your own without more of an explanation.” 

You know he’s right, but you just… you can’t tell him about El and the bad men yet. You can’t. Not until you know for sure what the hell is happening. 

“I’m sure it’s nothing… but just in case, I really need to find Dustin, okay?” 

I’m a really, really bad babysitter, you think. 

Jonathan opens his mouth again as if to argue, but you hold your hand up to silence him. You really don’t want to waste time fighting with him. He has to trust you on this, whether he likes it or not. 

He sighs with defeat, “Just be safe, please.”

You also really don’t want to put anyone else in danger. It’s bad enough that you allowed the boys to get dragged into this mess, but you refuse to drag your best friend in as well. But really, who knows? Maybe you’re just a regular idiot who believes in fairy tales and monsters, not some idiot who leaves three overly naive boys alone with a girl with superpowers. 

God you hope you’re just a regular idiot. 

However, if Joyce believes that Will is alive, even without the knowledge of El and her powers, then you’re sure that the boys also believe he’s alive and will inevitably go looking for him again. Alone. In the same woods Nancy saw that strange figure. 

You cast those thoughts out of your head and give Jonathan what you hope is a reassuring smile. “When am I not safe?”

You really, truly hope that you’re just an idiot, but if the photos that you just saw scare you. Before he can change his mind, you quickly reach over and snatch Jonathan’s keys from his jacket and give him a peck on the cheek before running out to his car.

“I call shotgun, Nancy!”

– 

Unsurprisingly, the drive with Nancy and Jonathan is an awkward one. Things are still a bit tense between you and him for reasons you’re not sure you can tell him about just yet, and now Nancy is in the backseat trying not to make any sound, so really it was a doomed car ride from the start. 

It’s not that you don’t like the girl, but there’s something about the way she acts around Jonathan that honestly makes you want to collapse. You know she’s with Harrington, but the tenderness Jonathan has shown her the few times they’ve interacted makes you uneasy. 

Yesterday you chalked the uneasiness to simply never sharing Jonathan before, but now you know the truth. 

You’re jealous because you’re in love with him. 

It’s a nauseating feeling. 

“So, how long have the two of you been friends?” Nancy’s question surprises you, mostly because she should already know the answer. You know she’s just trying to make conversation, but the question itself further reminds you of why the two of you had drifted apart in the first place. 

“I moved here when I was twelve, remember? Your family helped us move in.” 

“Oh, right. Sorry,” You see Nancy nervously playing with her fingers in the rearview mirror, which makes you feel bad. She’s trying, you know she is. 

“It’s fine,” you try to catch her eye, and when you do you give her a smile. “I know you probably don’t remember much from that day. It was the middle of the school year and our brothers immediately started being annoying together, so you had gone inside after only a couple minutes.” 

Nancy laughs, now remembering that day. “Didn’t Mike hold an initiation for Dustin that night?” 

“Yeah,” you laugh with her now. “That’s actually how Jonathan and I met. Remember, bee?” 

Jonathan’s smile is a soft one, a smile that makes you feel weak because you know you’re the reason it’s there. “Of course I do. We both showed up at the Wheeler’s house at the same time to pick up our brothers.” 

“And then-” 

“I answered the door.” Nancy finishes for you. 

“Yup. Ever since then, Jonathan hasn’t been able to get rid of me.” 

“It’s been horrible,” he says with a monotone voice, but it’s clear to everyone that he’s joking. 

You punch his shoulder. “You weren’t complaining when I saved you from those bullies later that week.” 

Jonathan gives you a pointed look and tries to subtly motion towards Nancy, clearly embarrassed that you've brought the bullies up in front of her. Like he wants her to think he’s someone cooler than he really is. 

Your smile vanishes. 

He wants to impress her. 

“Right, sorry,” you clear your throat and if Nancy notices your sudden mood change, she doesn’t say anything. You squeeze your eyes shut for a moment and remind yourself that what matters right now are the boys and El. They should be your priority, not petty boy drama. 

Luckily Jonathan pulls into your driveway not long after the abrupt conversation ending, which you’re thankful for. 

You unbuckle your seatbelt and turn to face Nancy, and it takes everything in you to force a smile on your face. “Alright, well, this is my stop! Nancy, I’m trusting you to tell me whatever you and Jonathan find. I’d ask him to keep me updated, but I know he’ll inevitably forget.”

The girl nods at you. “You can trust me.” 

Can I?

Although you’re not exactly sure what it is that you don’t think you can trust her with. Then, your eyes drift to Jonathan and the way he’s staring at her from his own mirror, and you realize that maybe she’s not the one you should be worried about. 

“Good,” you turn to Jonathan now. “I’ll call you later, okay?”

“And I’ll answer… probably.” 

“You’re so sweet to me.”

“I know, right?” 

You snort at the boy and wave goodbye to him and Nancy before getting out of the car. Your bike is in the shed, so you motion to Jonathan that he’s good to leave. When he’s sure you’re okay, he waves at you one last time and drives away. 

It feels like you’ve made a huge mistake as you watch Jonathan and Nancy leave, but you don’t have time to think about why. Dustin’s bike isn’t in the shed alongside yours, which you expected, and you have to find him. 

Your brother and his idiotic friends need you right now. 

– 

For the second time within a week, Steve Harrington almost kills you with his stupid BMW. Granted, the first time wasn’t necessarily his fault due to your crying, but this time just felt personal. 

“Henderson!”

“Jesus christ-” You’re biking to the Wheeler’s, lost in thought as the sun begins to set, when stupid Harrington scares the shit out of you. 

His unexpected shouting from the other side of the road causes you to swerve your bike towards his car and he has to slam on his brakes to avoid hitting you. 

“Do you, like, have a fantasy about me hitting you with my car?” 

You glare at the boy. “You are a man, I am a woman. It’s getting dark outside. What exactly made you think it’s a good idea to yell out at me?”

“Well, I mean, I called after you.” He says, so matter of factly that it makes you want to strangle him. 

You hate him. You really do.

A strand of hair has fallen in your face, so you blow it away before bothering to answer. “My apologies, you called after me and almost killed me in the process.”

Steve winks at you. “Apology accepted.” 

You stare at him, unamused and still in the middle of the damn road, and after a couple beats of silence you cock your head at the boy. “Are you going to tell me what you need or…?”

“Oh,” Steve coughs, as if startled by your question. “Honestly I didn’t really have a plan when I called after you. I just kinda did, so…” 

“Right, well.” You clench your jaw in annoyance. Why are you even surprised that Harrington has wasted your time? “This was fun, let’s never do it again sometime!”

You ride off on your bike, trying to quickly get up the hill so that you can get to the Wheeler’s before it gets too dark to see. The hill is brutal and it’s almost embarrassing how long it’s taking you to get up it, and as you’re huffing and dripping in sweat, headlights come up from behind you. 

“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” you groan. 

Steve’s car is now right next to you, the fucker having done a complete u-turn to follow after you. His window is still rolled down and he has one hand on the steering wheel and the other hanging out his window. 

“Hello again, Henderson.” 

“I never said hello back to you.” 

“C’mon, at least pretend to be happy to see me.”

You let out another groan as you continue to struggle up the hill. “I physically cannot do that, sorry.” 

Steve, ever the comedian, responds, “It doesn’t seem like you can physically get up this hill either.” 

You don’t give him the satisfaction of laughing, but you’re a bit annoyed that his quip was funny. What a jackass, honestly. 

“Henderson,” your silence doesn’t deter the boy, “just get in the damn car already.”

Once again you almost crash into the BMW, this time because of your complete shock at his request.

“What?”

He gives you a look as if you’re the insane one in this situation. “You’re sweatier than I am after basketball, and at the rate you’re going I’d say you’ll reach your destination in about three to five business days.”

You stare at him, speechless. 

He stares back at you with a smirk on his smug little face, knowing that he’s won the argument. “Get in the car and I’ll throw your bike in the back.” 

You do as he says, your mind completely blank and still taken aback. Sweatier than him after basketball? There’s no way that’s true, and also who says that to someone they barely even know? As if you’re really that sweaty-

You see your reflection in his car mirror and wince. 

Okay, so maybe you’re a little sweaty. 

Fuck Steve Harrington. 

The boy in question tosses your bike in the trunk as you hesitantly get in the car. He watches as you sit yourself down and laughs. “It’s a car, Henderson. It won’t bite.” 

“Yeah, but you might.” You slap a hand over your mouth, embarrassed by the implications of your words. 

Steve raises an eyebrow at you as he turns the car back on. “Careful there, last I checked you’re a taken lady.”

The embarrassment you previously felt is gone, now replaced with your usual annoyance when it comes to Steve. You think about what he did yesterday to Jonathan’s camera, the cruelty in his eyes as he watched the thing shatter onto the ground. He didn’t show any remorse, and while you understand that he had been defending his girlfriend, he had taken it too far. 

“How many times do I have to tell you that Jonathan and I are just friends?” 

“Please,” Steve huffs with amusement, “the two of you have been inseparable for years. Besides, no way a guy like Byers can just be friends with a girl like you. Not scientifically possible.” 

You wrinkle your nose. “What’s ‘a girl like you’ supposed to mean?” Then another thought occurs to you, “Also, you didn’t even know my name until this week, so don’t go acting like you know my relationship with Jonathan.”

“Relax, Henderson. It was a compliment. All I meant is that you’re decently pretty, all things considered, so I wouldn’t blame Byers if he was in love with you. It’s human nature.”

“Okay, that’s just really sexist-”

“As for knowing your name only this week, you’re wrong.”

“I’m sorry?” You ask, confused. 

Steve places a hand over his chest, almost as if he’s reaching for his heart. “Apology accepted, it means a lot to me.”

“Ugh,” you scoff at him. “That wasn’t an apology and you know it. Can you just take me to the Wheeler’s, please?”

“Woah, slow down there. First I need you to tell me why you thought I didn’t know your name, then I’ll take you to my girlfriend’s house. Free of charge.” 

If you didn’t know any better, you’d think that you see some offense in Steve’s eyes for thinking he only recently learned your name, but why would he care? Besides, you know he’s never paid any attention to you before this week.

“It was literally this week that I had to tell you my name after you almost hit me with your car, Harrington.”

“Okay, hey,” the boy holds a finger up. “Actually, you almost hit me with your bike because you were too busy hysterically sobbing.”

He’s right, but you won’t tell him that. Minor details, honestly. You’re about to tell him as much before you realize what he’s said. “Wait, you knew I had been crying?”

Steve gives you a well, duh look. “Yeah, that’s why I pretended not to know your name. Figured you wouldn’t want to talk about it and the least I could do was make you laugh. And viola, I did.” 

He had willingly tried to make you laugh?

His words make you flush, which seems to only amuse him further as he chuckles at you. You wave your hand at him, now more annoyed than ever. “Okay, fine. Whatever, so you knew my name before this week, big whoop. Can you just drive now?”

“I’ll take that as an ‘I’m sorry Steve for assuming you’re an asshole who hadn’t noticed a girl you’ve known since you were thirteen’, then.” Steve takes the car out of park and begins to drive to the Wheeler’s which you’re relieved by. 

You feel uncomfortably warm after that conversation, regardless of the fact that you’re still overheated from your biking. There’s no way that Steve has seriously known about you since you were twelve and he was thirteen. No, you decide that he must be lying, playing up his usual boyish charm. He’s been this untouchable entity ever since you moved to Hawkins, so why would he have paid any attention to you?

Then your mind floats to his compliment, calling you “decently pretty”, but then again not even five minutes earlier he stated that you sweat more than he does after basketball, so really his words should mean nothing.  

And yet, after the week you’ve had and your fight with Jonathan and Will’s death and El’s mysterious powers… 

Steve’s words make you a bit giddy, embarrassingly enough. You hate that they do, because he’s Steve Harrington and he’s with Nancy who is beautiful and kind and everything you’re not. It doesn’t matter what he thinks of you. 

You pick at your nails as he drives, the car silent, and you accidentally graze against the cut on your finger from yesterday. It’s scabbed over by now, but the pain is still fresh. 

“I know that what Jonathan did was wrong, I won’t excuse his actions. Standing up for Nancy was the right thing to do and I admire you for it, really,” Steve spares you a glance as he drives, nodding his head slightly to indicate that he’s listening. “But breaking Jonathan’s camera wasn’t.” 

He groans. “Nancy said the same thing, but what’s the big deal? The creep shouldn’t have access to a camera if he can’t use it properly.”

The slight warmth that Steve had somehow put in your chest dissipates at his words. “Jonathan isn’t a creep, but regardless of the situation, the big deal is this: not everyone can afford a fancy BMW and Raybans. Not everyone in Hawkins lives in a giant mansion with a pool. He worked so hard to afford that camera, it’s not something that he can just buy again on a whim.” 

Steve shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “Henderson, you know I didn’t mean it like that-”

“I know, but it was still a shitty thing to do.”

The silence that settles in the car is a heavy one, and you almost feel bad for Steve. You know he hadn’t thought about the repercussions of his actions, but you suppose that the fact that he hadn’t considered the price of a camera was proof enough of his naivety. 

When you get to the Wheeler’s, Steve gets out of the car to help you with your bike. He doesn’t let you do a thing, so you stand there and awkwardly watch. You can tell that he’s trying to make up for his actions from yesterday, which you appreciate. 

“Thank you,” you say once he places the bike down. 

“All in a day’s work.” Steve responds, wiping his hands off on his jeans. 

As he turns to leave, you stop him. “And thank you for earlier this week, ya know, for making me laugh after falling off my bike. I, uh, appreciate it.” 

He seems surprised by your sincerity, but he smiles. “Again: all in a day’s work. And listen, I’m sorry about Byers’ camera,” Then he quickly adds, as if afraid he won’t have the nerve to later, “I’m sorry about Will, too. I figure you were close with him and now he’s…”

His words trail off, not wanting to say the word “dead”, which you can’t blame him for. 

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re a bad person.” Steve turns to face you now, your words catching his undivided attention. “You just have the worst taste in friends, but when you aren’t around them… I guess you’re alright.” 

He laughs a bit, but there’s a certain emotion in his eyes that you can’t quite name; you have to stop yourself from leaning in closer to him. Suddenly the space between you feels too close and you take a step back, but as you move you feel Steve’s hand ruffle your hair. “I guess you’re ‘alright’ too, Henderson.” 

You watch as he leaves, standing in the Wheeler’s driveway for longer than necessary. You place your hand on your head and find yourself smiling, the warmth of his touch still faintly there.

-

⌑ series masterlist

⌑ if you would like to be added or removed from my taglist please just let me know :)

⌑ taglist - @siriuslysmoking @sheisjoeschateau

#steve harrington x henderson!reader #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #stranger things #steve harrington fanfic #stranger things rewrite #slowburn #angst #wdtai #m's writing #hey what happens in this chapter ? everything #the answer is everything

[angel-gone-south]

i have a request for gn!reader who js eats everything after seeing my brothers doing this. Most common stuff bein like playdoh, orbeez, or flowers w craig, tweek and maybe some of the main kids? probably would make more sense if they all were 4th graders? (srry if its too much, like ur stuff and saw reqs were open!)

Main 5 + Craig and Those Guys w/ Reader Who Eats Everything!

my friend used to do this. i think its a disorder? pica iirc anyway TYSM FOR UR REQ 4th grade reader + boys

【☆】★【☆】

Eric Cartman

hey what are u doing

hey that's not food, you idiot

makes fun of you for it

but secretly keeps an eye on what goes in

berates you extra hard when its something extra bad

brings you snacks sometimes so you don't put bad shit in your mouth

if you question him about it "mom packed too much"

Kyle Broflovski

no!! no no!!!

lectures you like a mom

brings you chew stims or snacks when he can

has to practically keep you on a leash

jesus christ he does the thing where he pinches the bridge of his nose when he gets annoyed

enjoys your presence but you stress him out deeply!

Stan Marsh

bets you you can't swallow it (if it's safe)

holds your hand in a death grip so you can't run off and get into something really bad

steals his sister's mints and gum so you can have it

sometimes you gnaw on his arm

he pats your head while you do

thinks you're MAD WEIRD but loves u fr

Kenny McCormick

dude he does it too a lot

if he doesn't think it's safe he eats it first

has died a lot this way

doesn't mind though if it keeps you safe

would let you chew on him but he's a bit stinky so you don't

he steals you dog toys as a joke but you actually use them

flattered but laughs at you

Butters Stotch

oh golly

please dont eat those

he worries so bad

:[

makes you the stuff that's like playdough but edible

has chew stims out the wazoo

lets you chew on his sleeve and then wails about the wetness

he doesn't actually mind though

Craig Tucker

pays you to do it

laughs when you hate the taste of something

"your fault for putting it in your mouth, idiot."

he's right tbh but you still pout about it

has so many pictures of you putting random shit near your mouth

taken seconds before he snatched them away from you

his sister eggs you on

he yells at her for it and then also eggs you on

Tweek Tweak

oh god oh god please don't!!

screams when he catches you

you've got this boy practically ripping his hair out

worried about even the smallest things

he can't stand to watch but also feels inclined to (to keep you safe)

learns the Heimlich just because of you

bought books upon books of what flowers, bugs, and plants are ok to eat

it keeps him up at night

Jimmy Valmer

always cracking jokes

definitely thinks you should be more careful though

will learn about it (not to the tweek extent)

tries some stuff with you like wild blackberries

one time you guys ate gingko sapling

boy, the bitter taste would NOT come out!

Tolkien Black

while he thinks it's cute, he will urge you to stop

whenever the boys catch you doing it clyde goes "aw, momma's gonna be mad"

then turns to tolkien

eye rolls are given in return as he stops you from consuming literal poison ivy

gives you gum and chewy stimmies

holds you by the shirt collar when you run to grab something

Clyde Donovan

silly goose

honest to god makes bets with craig on if you will (tw) throw up or not

bites you back if you bite him

eats certain things with you

you both got sick from eating marigolds once

his mom was not very happy with you

but the days next to each other in the hospital room were fun

you ate flowers less after that

#south park x y/n #south park #south park fanfiction #south park x reader #south park x you #emeto #gn reader #sp kyle #sp stan #sp eric #sp cartman #sp butters #sp craig #sp tweek #sp tolkien #sp clyde #sp jimmy #sp kyle broflovski #sp stan marsh #sp kenny #sp kenny mccormick #sp butters stotch #sp craig tucker #sp tweek tweak #sp jimmy valmer #sp clyde donovan #➳ Sticky Notes!♡ #➳ Return to Sender!♡

[kenlvry]

Kyle x s/o who smokes nic n weed n gets all cozy when they highing yo, laying o ZAZA!!

high with kyle

an, never smoke weed b4 but i have a vape, does that count as nic?? idk. also what do you call it when you take a smoke.. like take a blunt?? take a huff?? take a hit?? i hope you guys understand what i mean bc im using it in this also gn reader, reader isn't colour coded so dw

"dont be a wuss and do it kyle, it's not like it can do anything to you or anything" you said as you pass the joint to kyle " smoking weed is literally as dangerous as smoking cigarettes" he said passing it back to you "boo ur no fun" you said as you placed it inbetween your mouth, kyle let out a loud sigh "fine give it, if i get cancer it's your fault" you laughed and passed it to him. you two were in your house, your parents isn't coming home soon so why not take this opportunity? he coughed a little but he smoked before so it was ok, still coughing you took it away from his hands "dude where did you even get this?" you were all giggly and took another hit "hehe stans dad" "maybe youve had enough of this, ur wayyy too high" you just laughed and he took more hits anddd before you know it you two were high, you two laughed at every single shit. your cat licking its asshole? funny as hell, you burped? fucking comedian. kyle then dropped the blunt and you were too high to get mad and just laughed "dude we should like totally make out" "what." you stared at him "just kidding omg you totally thought i was being fr" and you bursted out laughing acting as if mans was kevin hart. then the door flung opened, it was stan "DUDE WHAT THE FUCK?? my dad told you bought weed y/n " you stood up walking over to him putting your hand around his shoulder "why? you want it on this?" kyle also walked over "cmon, this shit is actually good" "no thankyou, if you die 5 years from now i won't come to the funeral" you both laughed as he left your house "whatever loser". there were board games on your table and you decided to play snakes and ladders, classic game "cmon kyle what colour counter do you want" he then proceeds to put his counter on the board "kyle thats a chess peice" you to would prank call cartman acting like your funny "um hello yes you have contacted how to be a stripper hotline, do you want to be a stripper?" you two suppress laughter as if he cant hear the "dude shut up" from the other line, you can hear cartman let out a loud sigh "y/n youre the one who called me and this is the 3rd time you called get a life bitch" "thats definitely what a stripper would say" and you two burst out laughing , cartman blocks you atp. he'd green out first like mans is sweating in the middle of snakes and ladders but refuses to loose and is still rolling the dice "dude i think imma puke" "sick dude do it in the bathroom" and he vomits "i think.... i need to lay down" "LAY DOWN ON THE COUCH NOT IN YOUR OWN PUKE". when he wakes up he has no idea of what happens and claims he never smoked but you,stan,cartman and the vomit stain on your carpet says otherwise.

#kyle broflovski #sp kyle #kyle broflovski x reader #sp kyle broflovski #south park x reader #south park x y/n #south park

[roe-and-memory]

UHMMM in your guy's pinned it says your ok with asks sooooooo

You guys should totally hand over all of your Lightning headcanons :3

HIHIHI IM SO SORRY ITS BEEN LIKE 4 DAYS

hi this is roe quick interruption

thats all ty

ok so…. a magician cannot reveal all of their secrets so ive picked a Select amount of our favourites because obviously we need some surprises,…. its still a LOT though so dont worry i wouldnt dare cut you cheap on our headcanons

if you guys want us to make a separate post on a specific one going into detail of the Lore behind it or just like, more detail in general, dont be afraid to comment and your wish is my command

HERE WE GO!!!

- “HE IS A DUMBASS AND I HATE HATE HIM” (roes words, affectionate)

- he is a liar, sometimes good sometimes bad (only when he wants to) and doc sees through All of it

- he has a walkman he’s had since he was little, he broke the headphones once and mack bought him new ones

- we’ve mentioned it before but he has vision light sensitivity issues

look at him. he cant see SHIT

- he grew up in henderson, nevada, every time a race came to vegas he walked FOUR HOURS to see it from outside the track (he lived an hour and a half from some of the only family that would ever love him in radiator springs EL OH EL!)

- hes a natural redhead but harv thought having him bleach his hair blonde would get him more attention so he did it because harv knows best! sally made him stop when he tried to do it after his roots took over and she was like erm no ! thats destroying your hair and ur curls. and him, not knowing much about his hair was like yeah sure ok

- he has Freckles. So Many. sally tells him he has stars and constellations on his cheeks and hes just giggling and kicking his feet

- also mentioned before he has a lanyard with keys and keychains on it that he carries everywhere hanging out of his pocket

- he has. Horribly. vivid nightmares. so he doesnt sleep much and when he does its always restless

- being a racecar driver he has MASTERED the ability to climb out of windows. he uses this ability to not only cause doc grief (he sleeps across the hall and hears everything), but also to sneak out in the middle of the night when hes restless and prance around in the field like a deer to make himself so sickeningly exhausted he passes out as soon as he lays down

- lightning and sally dance sometimes at the wheel well, neither of them are too good and he wants to practice for her - doc catches him in the living room poorly dancing to rascal flatts and doesnt let him live it down the entire rest of the day

- lightning runs away when hes 15, after walking 4 hours to vegas for a piston cup race he wanted to watch and then deciding he never wanted to go home — there was nothing there for him anyways. he had everything from home he wanted, which included his walkman and thats basically it

- (adding onto above) mack found him at a truck stop somewhere on an interstate asking for either money or a ride somewhere, and as an older brother of 5 little sisters who are his worlds, he saw him and immediately thought . if that was one of my siblings i would never forgive myself. and boom he has a new little brother and boom lightning has an older brother

- he knows how to operate a transport truck courtesy of mack

- he loves stickers, he always has, his walkman and an assortment of his other things are decorated in stickers

- lightning didnt have any friends in his rookie year, so when he has mater, doc, sally, cal, and bobby, he makes little random collages out of magazines and newspapers to keep them as memories

- he loves country music and HATES taylor swift (bobbys fault, bobby is a swiftie)

- doc has sunglasses that lightning finds in his garage, BURIED in a box, they have “hudson” engraved into the arm and he immediately takes them for himself because sometimes its Too sunny (doc when its sunny, he’s out enjoying a beer on the porch and his annoying boyfail son comes outside and stands expectantly awaiting his sunglasses in which he forks over hesitantly)

- crocs or converse there is no in between

- autism.

- he pulls on the threads of his clothing when hes excited or nervous

- talks with his hands, very expressive and he also kicks the ground sometimes for no reason

- he was never taught how to ride a bike. doc is slowly writing down a list of reasons he can KILL 👹 lightnings parents for being HORRIBLE ‼️‼️‼️

THATS ALL FOR NOW…. with time you will learn more but I HOPE YOU LIKE THESE ONES!!!

#lightning mcqueen #cars 2006 #cars fandom #cars fanart #doc hudson #sally carrera #mack cars #hes so fucking silly he needs to be STOPPED #the part where we call him boyfail IS HILARIOUS #like he is actually incredibly sucessful for his age #he just has boyfail energy #mack has 5 sisters trust me it makes sense #cars headcanons #memory’s headcanons #roe’s art

[character-of-all-time]

Now that the submissions are closed, were there any funny submissions that topped the previously stated funny submissions?

I might end up publishing the full response list to browse through at your leisure and so that someone else can seek out the hee hoo funny ha has rather than making myself go through all 1522 again, but I would like to highlight a few submissions that stuck with me:

character: Sam Winchester

from: supernatural

why?: oh COME ON. ur gonna make me defend sam fucking winchester as the most character of all time?? he literally has bangs. he died at 23. he died at 26. he died a lot of other times too but those are the most important ones. he's jesus and he's the antichrist and he gets placed on a visual crucifix too many times to count. he's an addict and he's a christian and god is making his life miserable on a personal level. he is wholeheartedly convinced that there are other people who "have it worse" than him (he was tortured by satan for centuries). again he HAS bangs. he's been possessed too many times to ever feel like his body is his own. he's in a constant cycle of being beaten down and KNOWING he shouldn't get back up, and not wanting to get back up, and getting back up anyway like a kicked puppy who thinks maybe this time they won't get kicked. never ever gives up but in a sad and pathetic way that makes u feel vaguely nauseous. he's psychic. he bought a ring for his girlfriend while they were still in college. he went to stanford. he's unclean in the biblical sense but he prays every night. he had a queer allegory arc spanning multiple seasons that people ignore so they can claim he's cishet. he totally fucked a 300-year-old witch while studying under her to become a witch himself. everyone he has ever loved is dead and he knows it's his fault. he spends the first few decades of his life angry -- SO angry -- at everything he's been put through, full of rage at the things he's suffered and the people who caused them. he is punished for this fury, taught to never be angry again, and after a while he just lies down and takes it. he is a serial killer and on the fbi's most wanted list. he uses "low sodium" as an insult. he's a vegetarian. he never drives his father's car. he has demon blood flowing through his veins and his best friend is a literal biblical angel. he's an abomination. he thinks that hope is kind of the whole point. he has BANGS. he killed his brother several times over, and he destroyed the world to bring his brother back to life a few times too. he spent time in a psych ward. he thinks he is terribly hard to love. his mother destroyed his life before he was even born and he still calls her "mama." he died at 23. he was kicked out of the house when he was 18, and then was kicked out of basically everywhere else for the rest of his life. his only family locked him in a panic room and left him to die. he forgave them for that because he doesn't know how to do anything but forgive. he's got bangs. anyway

what do you want?: u KNOW what i want. if my best friend sam doesn't win this bracket i'm crashing my car into the world's tallest and thickest tree

--------------

character: jesse pinkman

from: breaking bad

why?: Well.Well. i. so. hes THE character okay he was created in gods eyes only to be sculpted and changed by the wrath of satan (or the other way around). Its jesse pinkman. have you ever watched 5 seasons of a grown man with cancer abusing another grown man in order to support his family who hate him because of the way hes trying to support them (drugdealing)?No? well i need you to and then come back to me. jesses relationship with the aforementioned Grown man with cancer (walter white) is so multidimensional you could refer to jesse as walters affair, student, victim, partner in crime, son figure etc and it would be RIGHT because they are all encompassing and fucked up. and jesse loses everything and he cries and hes so emotional but he PREVAILS. he prevails and he precedes walter and all the toxically masculine men who hated him, who convinced him was less than who he was. and the dog motif!!!!! hes a loyal dog but his owner has been slowly feeding him poison, to break him down slowly, and its killing him so he BITES because it hurts and they all talk about the rabid dog he is, how badly the owner needs to put him down. and then his owner gives him away to much worse men, owners who wont feed him the poison slowly, but will beat and use him relentlessly. and then his old owner is going to die and he knows it and he needs to secured his reputation and put everything in place. he saves the dog and kills the dogs new owners. he BEGS for his dog to kill him, to kill him like he had done to the dog. but this dog is not like any of his owners, hw will never be. so he barks and says that he should do it himself and he RUNS. hes crying and whimpering but hes not getting beaten or poisoned anymore, hes a free dog and its up to him to make his own future without the influence of evil owners. THAT'S jesse Pinkman. hes the bride of heisenburg hes the dog motif and he loves and loves and protects animals and kids because he couldn't protect himself and he wins with tears in his eyes. um also hes trans so ^ hasnt watched this show in like 7 months i have mo idea what im talking about

what do you want?: one billion dollars

------

who: Victor frankenstein

from: Mary shelley frankenstein

why?: I don't remember anything about this book except for the incredible and relatable line of 'I raveged an oatcake' cos God man me too

what do you want?: An oatcake

-----

who: sphagnum moss

from: real life

why: Love that bitch. They are light and hold moisture well. and they also form peat bogs when they die which is swag

what do you want?: To be turned into a zebra mussel and sleep in a Marimo moss ball and not have to worry about relationships or taxes

-------

who: Guy Montag

from: Fahrenheit 451

why?: he kills his boss with fire which i think is pretty cool and something we can all aspire to. i also want him to be in an online popularity contest because i want ray bradburys head to explode from beyond the grave

what do you want?: prove life after death so i can destroy ray bradbury’s soul

#askance #supernatural #sam winchester #breaking bad #jesse pinkman #frankenstein #victor frankenstein #guy montag #fahrenheit 451 #sphagnum moss

[honeysuckleharrington]

hi i dont know if requests are open still, but can i request draco x reader where its love at first sight ? and he cant stop thinking about it and finally goes after her, idk i just love draco angsty smut sm smh ily u draco thanks in advance!! love ur work !

— 𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐞 | 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐟𝐨𝐲 ⋆･ﾟ:⋆･ﾟ

❛ 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ❜

hi!! so sorry i never specified but i don’t write smut however i still tried to make it a little spicy for you!! tysm for the request!! i hope you like it regardless!!

the yule ball wasn’t something you’d necessarily been looking forward to. you’d picked out the perfect outfit and spent much too long fixing your hair, but knowing that you wouldn’t be there with draco made it all feel less than worth it. for weeks, you’d watched him in class or across the table in the dining hall, hoping he would glance your way and happen to ask you to accompany him to the dance. however, when your potions partner malcom pinescrew asked you, you couldn’t say no, losing all hope that draco was going to. you guys barely talked after all, so why would he?

malcom was sweet— he really was. he was in the year below you and tried his best to make conversation. he even bought you flowers from hogsmede, hoping it would win you over. but all night, your eyes were stuck on draco who was across the room, pansy standing very close and laughing very loudly.

“care for some punch?” malcom asked, following your gaze and frowning at the sight of draco.

“hm?” you pulled your focus back to him, trying to shake the image of pansy playing with the lapels on draco’s dark suit jacket from your mind, “um yeah, sure! thanks mal…”

he left you alone and you leaned back against the wall, the stone cold against your skin. you sighed, deciding it wasn’t worth it to be there anymore and making a beeline for the nearest exit. walking quickly down the corridor, you winced at the pain your feet were in from your shoes.

“damn it,” you muttered, biting your lip to fight back tears that threatened to spill down your cheeks.

“y/n?”

you turned around, afraid for a second that malcom had found you running away from him but were instead met by draco whose eyes were practically burning holes in yours. before you could even say anything, he was walking quickly towards you.

“draco? wh-”

he wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you up slightly to meet his lips, the other one finding its way to the back of your head, tangling itself in your hair. his kiss was urgent, tasting of spearmint gum. he backed you up against the wall of the corridor, placing a hand on one side of your head, the smell of his cedarwood cologne consuming you. you felt him bite your lip, suddenly.

“ow! what the hell was that for?” you said, pulling away, his face just inches from yours.

“sorry, you just look so good tonight,” he said, placing kisses along your jaw and and collarbones, “i couldn’t stand for another minute that you were there with him instead of me,”

“it’s not my fault you didn’t grow a pair and ask me yourself,” you replied, kissing him again, breathless.

“it’s not my fault pansy wouldn’t shut up about it for weeks,” he said, “you would’ve asked her too just to get her to be quiet,”

“you know you can be really mean sometimes, draco,”

“if i was mean i wouldn’t be doing this right now,” he snapped back, finding your lips again.

“draco,” you smiled into the kiss, pulling away, “we can’t do this here,”

“merlin, don’t be so boring,” he groaned, throwing his head back. “who cares?”

“ahem,” someone cleared their throat loudly from down the hall. you could tell it was snape right away. draco rolled his eyes and looked at you before turning around.

“sorry, professor,” you said, cheeks turning crimson, “we were just-”

“i didn’t ask what you were up to, miss y/l/n,” he said, giving you both a disapproving and frankly, frightening look, “malfoy, either head back to the ball or escort y/n back to her dorm. i wouldn’t want either of you to end up in detention this weekend,”

“yes, sir,” draco said, turning and grinning mischievously at you. he grabbed your hand and began walking in the direction of the slytherin common room, breaking into a run when you two turned the corner.

you struggled to keep up in your shoes, laughing as he pulled you behind him, “wait!” you said, face flushed, gasping for breath.

he stopped suddenly, causing you to crash into his chest, “sorry, miss y/l/n, i wouldn’t want you to end up in detention this weekend,” he picked you up by the waist, spinning you around before setting you down and kissing you again. you laced your arms around his neck, pulling away, and burying your face into his shoulder.

he moved his hands from your waist, one arm wrapping around your back and the other around your neck, pulling you closer, sighing in content at the feeling of your warm skin against his and the sweet scent of your shampoo floating through the air.

you tried to let go, placing a hand on each of his shoulders but his grip on you didn’t loosen.

“don’t,” he whispered, holding you tighter and combing his fingers gently through your hair.

“okay,” you replied, resting your head against his chest, hearing his heartbeat slow and feeling how his body relaxed under your touch. you brought him peace.

#draco malfoy #draco malfoy x reader #harry potter imagines #harry potter drabble #hp x reader #hp imagines #slumber party #draco #draco x reader #hermione granger #harry potter #ron weasley #slytherin

[such-justice-wow]

ur post about not wanting to change a fundamental part of yourself and that the world should change is very relatable. im appreciative of you putting it into words

for shoes, if youve got a thrift store id recommend trying to find pairs there. ive had some luck and even if they also only last 2 months its (for here anyway,) like $5 compared to brand new store ones of $40+

another way ive been lucky is just getting elderly peoples shoes (with permission). old stuff used to be made of actual nice material so if they took care of their shoes even just casually they can sometimes still have them survive till now and still be in great condition and made of nice quality material!

it really fucking sucks how much planned obsolescence is in everything :(

srry if this wasnt helpful at all, i hope your worries are someday mended

Thank you!

All the charity shops in my area kinda suck for things that aren't weird curios and clothes. One of them has actual rubbish on teh shelves that hasn't even been cleaned, its kinda gross.

My mum has tiny baby feet and so used to get shoes from sketchers because she was considered a kids size but she's gone off them a bit because their more recent lines just aren't as good quality. She also shops on ebay for shoes but I've had less luck there so far.

I'm aware some of it is my fault for hating trainers and preferring boots but I bought a £20 pair of boots which I busted within a month because the soles collapsed in on themselves and I think its insane they're allowed to sell a product that shit.

genuinely it's almost worth it for me to buy £7 primark shoes because they last a month and a half and my £80 vans lasted 3 months and that's insane

[disneyprincemuke]

the best of (instagram) * the vault

kidy/n

liked by milomanheim, oscarpiastri and 195,429 others

kidy/n the voices won’t stop asking me to treat myself after a race

view 29 comments…

comments on this post have been limited.

milomanheim cuz u deserve it queen

mickschumacher why wasnt i invited

milomanheim u werent there :(

kidy/n do u mind keeping the flirting minimal on my instagram comments section?

logansargeant traitor to the ice cream tradition

ylonagarcia loves!!! 💗

liamlawson30 what are you doing with my boyfriend

milomanheim :*

kidy/n what if i blocked both of u

andrettiracing my parents!!!!!!

f1 aww ❤️❤️❤️

sebastianvettel my invite must’ve gotten lost in the mail

kidy/n not the mail u old man

kidy/n posted on their story!

caption: said he knew a spot then brought me to disneyland wtf

milomanheim replied to your story i didnt hear u complaining when we bought u those minnie slippers

kidy/n hehehehe

kidy/n posted on their story!

caption: no way i retire from the race and milo drops my fries

milomanheim replied to your story FOR THE LAST TIME IM SORRY I TRIPPED ROCKS PLEASE

kidy/n SORRY DOESNT BRING ME BACK MY FRIES

milomanheim I TOLD YOU ID GO BACK TO MCDONALDS AND GET YOU ANOTHER MEAL

kidy/n WE WERE TOO FAR THEN just give it up

milomanheim i cant youre slandering my good name

kidy/n

liked by milomanheim, ylonagarcia and 148,281 others

kidy/n something about date night and please take a proper picture to save someone's life

view 12 comments…

comments on this post have been limited.

milomanheim its literally not my fault that ur incapable of taking proper pictures

kidy/n if u know whats best for u

milomanheim yeah i’ll shut up now

logansargeant actually true abt that picture thing

lilyzneimer ur getting better!!!

liamlawson30 wow i never knew i’d see the day you’d be good at taking pictures

kidy/n ENOUGH WITH THE SLANDER PLEASE

kidy/n posted on their story!

caption: PLEASE bro i literally JUst wOKE UP

milomanheim replied to your story STOP PLEASE PEOPLE ARE GONNA THINK ALL I DO IS TERRORISE U

kidy/n that's literally all u fucking do

milomanheim yeah but they dont need to know that

mickschumacher replied to your story can he sing to me

kidy/n he says any time babe but i say no so no

mickschumacher oh ok

kidy/n posted on their story!

caption: sometimes i wonder if there will ever be a time i'll wake up without the constant terrorism from milo

milomanheim replied to your story what the fuck is ur problem!

kidy/n literally u but ok

liamlawson30 replied to your story can u tell him i'd let him terrorise me

kidy/n literally just take him im tired

#disneyprincemuke vr #disneyprincemuke #disneyprincemuke imagine #disneyprincemuke imagines #disneyprincemuke f1 #vettel reincarnate #dpm vr: mocky

[lif3isstrange]

Ask gameeeeeee 🦖🦖🦖🦖🦖🦖🦖🦖🦖 (for research purposes this emoji needed to be used 🧐)

1. 14 and it sucked because of all the stigma around autism. People make it seem like this awful thing and that you’re just a fancy word for dumb, then I moved on but got upset because I felt like I was being a burden on everyone with my picky eating and sensory meltdowns but my psychiatrist said ‘don’t be angry at yourself for the way you are, be angry with the world, it’s the worlds fault for not fitting with you, not the other way around’. I was like damn she’s worth the money 🥳

2. I am in the people I live with so they all just think I bring up autism as an excuse and I’m really just a ‘spoiled brat’ 😍 my mum refuses to learn anything about autism at all and my sister said stimming was disgusting and sounded ‘sexual’ ?! My dads quite sus tho with the autism symptoms but doesn’t know how to deal with it🤨

3. I have adhd aswell so they both love to conflict 🥰, my autism thrives in routine but my adhd loves chaos, my autism wants to be quiet and focused and my adhd wants to look at how the tree kinda looks like that one from two years ago and loudly blab about something uninteresting to others 😟 it’s a lot to handle but I wouldn’t be as cool without em both so 😎

4. Yes but extremely confused and can’t be bothered to figure it out 🤩

5. That it isn’t our fault and we don’t do destructive things on purpose, we do it to try and display our feelings because we can’t really be verbal and calmly talk about them when we’re focused on how bright the lights are and how horrible and itchy our clothes start to feel. We need more time to adjust with change and so people need patience etc. many people even parents fail to understand what asd is like 🫡

6. Yes but only with another autistic so they got the sensory meltdowns but they were a bad person and liked their computer a lot more than me 💀 I love relationships as I am a very loving person and feel the need to share it but relationships are hard and extremely emotionally challenging plus I don’t trust men much anymore 😵‍💫

7. The adhd tends to come in clutch so I think it’s more my town lacks personality than me. I have a very analytical way where I will find something we are both passionate about and then ramble on about it with them then keep trying to find other things in common and go on etc. I basically treat befriending like a fun cia operation 🥸

8. My special interests aren’t as strong as other peoples but I love the game outlast 2 and the lore of it. There was so much work put into the game and theories how the speakers throughout the game were put a certain hz to brainwash the citizens into the religious insanity and the story behind the entire thing is just chefs kiss 🤌

9. Idk if this counts but probably Jacqueline Wilson books 😭 I bought and read every single book she wrote (my favourite was rose rivers) some of those books were so insane to read but I was such a bookworm. I bought every magazine she put out aswell and collected all the free gifts in them 🤭

10. Kill ur father and don’t listen to anyone bc they’re all evil 😭 I let everyone treat me like garbage and was such a sensitive little baby 😖 if I could go back I’d tell her to set everyone straight and not let anyone mess with me plus to stop being a weirdo 🤓

YAYY I DID IT AND ITS NOW 2AM

IK MY ANSWERS ARENT THAT INTERESTING BUT ENJOY!!! :)

#autism #actually autistic #ask game #neurodivergencies #actually adhd #asd #blog #special interest

[ssszlami]

Harry Potter characters as things my friends have said except there's way too many characters

Yes, we write down funny things we say, no that's not weird

Harry: “I wanna jump out a castle window but like not die” 

Ron: “WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE GOOD AT SOMETHING???”

Hermione: “It’s feminine to write a paragraph”

Neville: “Lore update: I’m confused as hell.”

Luna: “Hey I can’t come to the party on Friday night, I just bought a bunch of cows and I gotta chill with them.”

Ginny: “I feel like you’re only dating me for my brother.”

Draco: “My chat is in it’s gaslight era”

Dean: “This is a lot like a cult for a Christian movie”

Seamus: “Agility: Setting things on fire and watching it explode... but in different directions.”

Dumbledore: “No one here has committed any crimes, and if you have, they were funny crimes, so it’s fine”

McGonagall: “When u get to the exam its not gonna be helpful that you spent your lessons drinking gatorade and eating donuts”

Snape: “If you’re going to traumatise children at least make it aesthetic”

Sirius: “I’m so alpha that the men around me change their sexuality to accomodate for me”

Remus: “I have four lines of self-hate for you”

Lily: “The milfs in my bag”

James: “No beta we die like parental figures”

Molly: “Goodnight offspring.”

Arthur: “How often a day do you reckon your car gets a boner?” 

Fred: “Love. Truth. Bodacious Booty.”

George: "In this world, it's either meme or be memed. In my case it's both."

Percy: “It is boring! But.....we like boring.”

Bill: “Sometimes you gotta ruin the vibe for the greater good”

Charlie: "Close your face nipples and think about dragons" 

Oliver: “I’m a white man, we always win! Except at sports….except at hockey”

Hagrid: “You can't say fuck you to the dog!”

Lavender: “Not all women want to kiss women. I know, that one was a hard pill for me to swallow”

Parvati: “There is no girl on earth who is so straight she wouldn’t love having another pair of boobs around”

Padma: “Nobody likes princesses!! They’re white bitches who weren’t loved enough as children”

Crabbe: “Pancake....buttplug……pancake…….buttplug”

Goyle: *grunt* “Yes I just farted.”

Cho: “I was like ‘whatever’. Wait no I was really sad”

Cedric: “I just thumbs-upped the roof down”

Krum: “*completely monotone voice* but wait there’s more”

Fleur: “Sexism is bad. Kill everyone.”

Tonks: “Gotta go to the bathroom to change my gender real quick”

Moody: “This is not a time for sassy comebacks, this is a time for SURVIVAL!”

Lockhart: “Because I look cute it’s all my fault. Thats how that works apparently.”

Umbridge: “Oh my god it’s me! Shiny trash!”

Voldemort: “Sorry I’m holding your parents hostage and killing you but your parents can’t hear your screams of terror because they can’t hear you right now”

Bellatrix: “YOU GOTTA KILL SOME CHILDREN TO GET TO YOUR TRUE LOVE”

Lucius: “Have you started another cult?”

Narcissa: “Your son is okay” *sobs and cries*

Kingsley: “I haven’t laughed since 1972.”

Peter: “So, you’re on the floor spooning the rat”

Slughorn: “*loud chewing noises* Wow I hate myself”

Mundungus: “My voice cracked on the crack and im on crack”

Dobby: “I took my ugg boots off for that.”

Winky: “Is she gonna kill me? I’m very excited.”

Kreacher: “It’s just war miss it’s not upsetting at all” 

Myrtle: “I went to the toilet and I see like the toilet seat around her neck”

Trelawney: “Teaching pigeons to be art connoisseurs” 

Filch: “He’s like a really sticky person!”

Dudley: “Screw you I just want stuff”

Petunia: “Is there a reason you’re interrupting me mid-soup?”

Vernon: “So he’s mad” “Yeah he’s cranky” “No like insane”

Pansy: “I don’t hurt them I just legally stab them”

Lee: “Bro that’s rather cringe”

Quirell: “I don’t need an exorcism” “That’s exactly what somebody who needs a exorcism would say”

Amos: “I’m one of the last old white boys”

Karkaroff: “Terrible behaviour…. ur in denial my guy” 

Xenophilius: “EVERY JOB IS A GOVERNMENT JOB, AND I DONT KNOW WHO THE PRIME MINISTER IS”

Greyback: “I… put my hand inside his chest…and ripped out his lungs” 

Cormac: “Closeted homophobic”

Blaise: “He’s more attractive in a suit.” “ALL MEN ARE!”

Regulus: “Lucy it’s my turn to drown!!”

Aberforth: “ME? A member of the TEN COMMANDMENTS??"

Nearly Headless Nick: “Well, if you have to execute me… ok”

Marietta: “You can’t slay if you vape”

Mrs Figg: “Old lady woman man and his dog”

#harry potter #marauders #hp #hermione granger #ron weasley #draco malfoy #luna lovegood #ginny weasley #neville longbottom #severus snape #albus percival wulfric brian dumbledore #aberforth dumbledore #james potter #lily evans #sirius black #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #nearly headless nick #moaning myrtle #molly weasley #arthur weasley #bill weasley #charlie weasley #percy weasley #fred weasley #george weasley #cho chang #cedric diggory #fleur delacour #viktor krum

[menalez]

I need some advice. I recently was broken up with and I'm reeling from it. We met when i was 19 and he was 32 and we ended up hooking up 6 years ago. He didn't tell me until after we hooked up that he had a wife which started a crazy feud, but he eventually divorced his wife and convinced me to be in a relationship with him. The relationship was pretty rocky at first because he was very emotionally abusive. Like he would constantly reprimand me for doing the wrong thing and saying the wrong thing and would lecture me for hours and not let me sleep until I agreed with him. I used to live with him sometimes because my mom got evicted and i couldn't hold down a stable job because I had an untreated learning disability and he would pick fights with me every day when I would say/ do the wrong thing and sometimes he would even kick me out.

While he did all this its v confusing bc he was also very good to me at the same time?? He helped me out when I was evicted and let me live rent free with him. He helped me get my diagnosis and helped me look for a job. He helped me get over some of my insecurities and would urge me to go to therapy and helped me get my driver's license. The last 2 years he started becoming more spiritual and became a lot nicer to me (He would still reprimand me but not as often) and urged me to do yoga and meditation. He started getting serious and during that time he was throwing ideas around of leaving everything behind and going to a yoga center etc. I was so drained atp from the constant mistreatment and feeling like I wasn't a priority so I went outside the relationship to explore my options. i met a guy that I was going to meet for dinner and just talk to, but I was drugged and assaulted. I felt so guilty that I told my boyfriend and he broke up with me. This was a year ago. Since then, we've been on and off because he would come back but couldn't commit because he couldnt trust me. Early this year he moved to a different state and he reached out to me to ask if I wanted to visit him out there in the summer. I was cautious but I agreed because I missed him. We started calling and texting every day and he started hinting that he wanted a relationship with me again. I started catching feelings again and was grateful for the opportunity to make things right because I fucked up. I bought the plane tickets and two days after I bought them he told me that he was getting women flirting with him out there and that he wanted to explore his options. I was so upset and I asked him why we couldnt work things out, he told me he still couldnt trust me after what happened. He told me it's best if I get a refund on the tix and just stay home. I felt so crushed, I felt like I was lead on and I feel so ashamed and guilty over what I did. The worst part is I felt like I ruined everything and it's my fault that the relationship ended the way it did. What do I do???? I have no friends and no one to talk to.

oh my god anon the second u said 'we met when i was 19 and he was 32' i knew this was gonna be bad.

anon, dump this man and do not look back. he literally broke up with you for BEING RAPED. he made u feel guilty and like ur not trustworthy for being R A P E D. he would kick u out and utilise ur homelessness. he keeps confusing u. he literally is over a decade older than u, u were a teenager and hes nearing middle-aged!!!!!!!!!!! hes a creep!!!!!! he was using u and continues to and u NEED to put ur foot down n realise u deserve better than this

#trust me most abusers arent pure evil thats why many of us stayed in abusive relationships #he sounds like an abuser. most abusers have a 'good side' too

[atztranspm]

Yunho PM 6 : 07/30/23

So he did all these lives but its cuz they kept cutting on him 😭😭 poor yunho deserves better.

He started off by saying that he had just enough battery percentage on his phone to do a live before he had to go eat. He said he had finished doing a fan sign in Tokyo today. He said that time went quick because he was talking to atiny.

(The live started to lag so it was a little hard to pick things up. Bare with me please. This is difficult 😫)

He said he hadn't eaten yet but he was going to eat after in a little bit. He said that tomorrow they go to Osaka for another schedule.

He said that he was currently using his data and not the wifi. (Baby get a new plan. The data isn't much better then the wifi 😭😭)

He said he was trying to learn a little Japanese but it was a little hard to learn. He said that he was fascinated with how atiny simplified their languages to better communicate with them and how some even learned korean to speak to them. He is amazed by how international atiny learn Korean to better understand them.

The live lagged and then cut out 🧍🏻

It's alright yall he started a new one 🤩

He forgot what he was talking about and thought for a little before saying that he will keep studying languages to better communicate with international atiny. (He really just wants to speak with us and understand us to 😭😭😭)

The live keeps cutting-

(Yunho doesn't deserve the data 😒 I'm so upset for him right now)

He apologized for the bad connection (oh baby it's not ur fault 🥺)

He ended it and restarted it (kq fix this now please 👊💥)

He came back! He said that he hopes we tale care of our meals and to eat well.

He said he was thinking of two ending heartyus for the lives. One being "make sure to eat well heartyu" and the other was "the internet needs to be scolded heartyu"

(Yall the connection was doing him so bad I want to cry for him cuz I know he was getting frustrated like deep down)

He started manifesting a good connection. He said that he was going to stay on until it cut off again and that it better last till tomorrow. (🙏 yunho is manifesting 🙏)

He saw lots of tinys cheer him on in the chat and scolding the wifi. He said that since he had now said this, it was going to work well.

His tummy rumbled 🥺😭 can this man get any cuter, I swear I'm crying. (Only saying this cuz he is yunho, any other man I would have laughed at. Yunho is just superior I don't make the rules.)

He laughed a little and said that he really has nothing to hide from atiny and and said that everything was fully exposed to us. (🤭 feeling special)

He said that he had bought like 4 cups of ramen from the store and had lots of pudding. He said later he was going to have a good meal and maybe eat meat. He said that him and seonghwa destress by eating. (They're just like me)

He saw that the live was much smoother and that his manifestation had worked (the universe works for him actually, he is the favorite) he said he doesn't get angry often and even if he did, atiny wouldn't be seeing that side of him much. He said that the members and others around him say they think he is scary when he gets mad. He said he doesn't and would rather think and reflect on the issue instead. He just wouldn't feel good or be in a bad mood but he wouldn't take his anger out like that. (He's so wholesome and precious, they don't make men like yunho 😭)

He said he hopes that no matter what, we are always happy

Then the live started cutting again 🧍🏻

He decided to end the live before it could cut out on him again. He said he was going to go eat and the co.e back after. His phone was at 1% but he said it didn't matter since he doesn't need his phone while he eats and that he would let it charge. He said internet, you weren't bad, good job heartyu" did a little byeeee and then ended the live

(Kq better get these lives running smoothly cuz my boys are STRUGGLING, I know they cry inside everytime a live cuts off)

#ateez #atz #ateez translations #jeong yunho #yunho #07/30/23 #ateez live