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#like yeah theyre all white dudes and if i think about it ill be annoyed
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since you are reading the current doom patrol run and peacemaker seems to be the villain there, are they doing it in a "cishet white dude from the government against THE OUTCASTS 🤓☝️" way? because i feel like that'd be a kinda lame superficial understanding of both the DP as a group and peacemaker as a character. (not necessarily incorrect, but. superficial)
My little guy hasnt appeared in two whole issues now and actually hasnt gotten any of that YET but Im not very optimistic hes gonna keep escaping it for long if he actually gets another appearance. At least theyre leaning more into Peacemaker being a government stooge and I do kind of think some of how he acts implies hes not just doing this Just because he loves it and Hates People With Superpowers (though he does love it)
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He is here because the US government is trying to fuck up the doom patrol though. So Far I genuinely think this writer could go either way for Peacemaker, but I think the Doom Patrol is just in a really weird kind of annoying place right now in this still.
Half the reason I dont think Peacemaker is being set up like that is because this miniseries is very very blatant about what its doing so I think if he were he wouldve already called someone a SJW or something by now. Wouldve already said something ableist to someone in Jane's system like every other fucking character whos meant to be anti-doom patrol because theyre the FREAKS.
I do think this writer has a superficial understanding of the doom patrol because everyone hates them for having SUPERPOWERS because theyre WEIRD which like yeah I guess but it feels kind of goofy here because theyre doing all this allegory where the doom patrol is very clearly meant to stand in for LGBT people and mentally ill people in a way while using the wrong terms for systems and keeping the trans woman dead and for now having a man with At Least PTSD being the main villain.
But yeah sorry for the essay, basically short answer no but I think its because he hasnt gotten alot of screentime yet.
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piercedinhalf · 8 months
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Story time
Ugh this one isnt gonna be anything cute or funny, just infuriating (tw harassment)
So first of all it was a sunday event like slim pickings so we went with what we had, & the way my partner put it is "this looks like what elon musk thinks a rave is" it was just very corporate & sterile the vibe was not it
So an annoying element but not anything i wasnt used to was i literally cant remember the last time i felt so unwelcome in a space, like yeah im not passing so instantly everyone can tell theres a transgirl at the event but usually no one really seems to care, ill get some stares but im used to that, but bitch this place was ugly like everytime i was turning my head someone was suddenly averting their gaze as i caught them staring or not even being subtle like every time a man walked by it was very shameless just staring right in my face, they dont maddog or anything its almost like a confused "ew" face they make but yeah its still like chill tf out dude can i just exist? Ugh that is such a bad vibe, so keep all this is in mind as its literally happening every couple minutes all night, & again i judge these people for acting like this around me but also idgf ive had worse like at least it wasnt those nights where i genuinely feel scared, so im still holding my head up high dancing & feel content, i dont have any less right to the space than they do & frankly if me being there makes them uncomfortable then good lol thats their fucking fault for being like that
However midway thru the night theres a point near the front of the stage i was dancing with my gf & i felt a sensation graze the right side of my waist near my purse & i instantly grab my purse & turn around thinking someone is pickpocketing, cause thats how they do it they like "test" how fucked up u r by seeing if u notice that before they actually do it, but when i turn around its this old man like white haired over weight old man in glasses, i just scowl at him & move away to the other side of the stage, then liiiiiterally within the same minute he had already followed me over & this time touched my left side more around my wrist & i looked over & said "NO!" & i walked away again, at this point i thought he was just a chaser, chasers i can deal with theyre just a pathetic pest after all, & this other guy came over to me & my gf then said "oh yk u can tell security if that guys harassing u right?" & (of course my gf is always like this) she very loudly is like "IT WONT BE SECURITY ESCORTING HIM OUT" with a punching motion, which the old guy definitely saw so he kinda kept his distance, but like, an hour? 2 hours later? ig he got fuckin bored or something cause im dancing by myself & again i feel an egregious rub trail up my ass to my waist, & i turn around to see again that its him again & i scream "DONT FUCKING TOUCH ME!!!" in his face then i storm over to my gf & say "where the fuck is security" & explain what happened to her then she storms over to the bar & tells them "u all need to get ur shit together & escort this guy out or ill have to do it & if i do it itll be bloody" & yeah so obvi the security kicked out the groper
Ugh, it just, really really makes me angry, i was mad for a bit after that, cooling off, dancing, but honestly, recall how everyone has been giving me a shitty vibe all night, suddenly people are being nice to me? Like seeing me be harrassed 3 times & scream in a creepy mans face SUDDENLY people decide oh that maaaaybe i deserve to be treated like a human being? wtf man, also im so fucking furious about the whole thing because i dont think he was a chaser, i think he thought no one would care if i was being victimized, like he saw me in the crowd & thought "i can fuck with THAT one" that im literally lower stock or lower privilege, that i wouldnt have the self respect or respect of my peers to protect myself, & ugh im just so offended by someone daring to think that about me like it makes me violently angry i kinda wish i just punched his old ass out, what a fucking worthless degenerate subhuman
To wrap up, so the staff were also approaching us & saying "oh thanks for reporting that guy blah blah blah" but it wasnt giving like, they didnt know? Just the way they were saying it made it sound like they knew what was happening but didnt do anything so like yeah literally my gf had to do their fucking job for them & she told them that too
& lets be real why did they watch this happen to me & not do something until they ABSOLUTELY had to? Because they didnt perceive me as a human being, someone who deserves respect, they agreed with the guy groping me & thought "yeah u can fuck with that one its not even a person" they didnt care if i was being victimized & was betting no one else there would care if that was happening to me, since to them who cares if its happening to a transgirl, they probably thought i deserved it
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skepsys · 5 years
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tell us more about your two lovely OCs please! how did they meet? how did their ship start? :eyes:
oOOOHGFGGGGG BOYYY Okay well ive only had them for about a week or so? two weeks? not very long so some things are still prettyyyyy loose/vague, despite HOW MUCH time ive been putting into them LOL but there’s some pretty solid building blocks regardless so Here We Go
to clarify ahead of time in case i havent already somewhere, SAINT is the robot with the toothy mask and Maverick is the guy with the white jacket
READMORE CAUSE HOLY FUCK THIS GOT LONG
ill be honest, they start off trying to kill and generally being pretty nasty to each other....! they’re both assassin/hitman/mercenary types so theres naturally a lot of rivalry there over who gets the real good jobs and stuff, but it’s made pretty personal right off the bat because Maverick is very smug and annoying and from the second he meets SAINT he makes sure to make it ABUNDANTLY clear that he’s better than him.  Maverick’s been in the game a lot longer than SAINT; the first time SAINT ever takes a job, he shows up to crash it and steal this Super Secret technology he had been sent to grab (which he was going to do ANYWAYS bc it was tech related to human augmentation, which he’s a Big Fan of, but SAINT getting there first presented him an opportunity to be an aggravating show-off, which of course he couldn’t resist...).  underneath the snarky flair with which he one-ups and outmaneuvers SAINT in this first encounter there’s a pretty serious threat to step off his turf Or Else, which as i said sparks a pretty bitter, intense rivalry
they spend a Good Long While beating the shit out of each other, like its ON SIGHT every time, Maverick has the upper hand for the first while, considering that while SAINT is COMPETENT, having been developed for combat, the fact still remains that he’s technically not a robot, but an AI whos spent a lot longer living in a computer than running around out in the world.  he eventually gets the hang of it though, and learns to see through a lot of Maverick’s feints and tricks.  they get pretty into it, SAINT has torn off one of Maverick’s (entirely mechanical and therefore fixable) arms in a rage because hes SUCH an insufferable dickhead, Maverick has trapped SAINT in a gigantic gas explosion... its kind of a miracle that the two of them make it out the other side alive every time??
it starts turning around when in the middle of one of their dumb scraps they get grabbed by some shaaaaaaadyyyyyy paramilitary group that i havent Super developed yet, but they turn out to be the Main Villains of the story so yknow theyre important.  the two of them are of interest because Maverick’s got absurdly advanced augments and implants, like “shouldnt really exist” advanced, while SAINT is a cutting-edge combat AI riding around in a unique, high-tech body.  the intention is theyll both be picked apart to be reverse-engineered, but not too long after getting caught and detained, Maverick manages to break himself out, bc being a slippery little weasel is kind of his thing
he then DELIBERATELY goes out of his way to track down SAINT and get HIM out too, in his words because “even though SAINT’s a pain in the ass, he doesn’t really deserve to be straight-up tortured”.  unfortunately he can only find SAINT’s AI, and not his body, and given that he’s got precious little time to figure out what to do, the two of them pretty much settle on getting SAINT’s AI out of the facility and then coming back later for his body.  unfortunately AGAIN they’re both idiots and think uploading a fully fledged combat AI suite to cerebral implants that are only really suited for enhancing reflexes and split-second decision making is a good, reasonable idea
long, painful story short, in the time it takes to escape and get to safety, Maverick’s brain almost practically melts from the strain, nearly killing both him AND SAINT in the process.  luckily with the help of a guy named Harlan, a genius bioengineer and Maverick’s ex they manage to get SAINT out and into a server he can live on for the interim
they do eventually get SAINT’s proper body back after a time where he has to live between a server and a shoddy temporary replacement body (which he is very angry about the entire time) but i havent Exactly figured it out since that has GOT to be very difficult and probably more than a 1.5 man job.  the two of them actually manage to have some actual normal conversations during this time but its kinda awkward and stilted.  theres a fair amount of realizing like “oh huh this dude is just A Normal Guy with like, thoughts and interests and stuff not relating at all to wanting me dead” on both sides
after this point they still butt heads fairly often but its toned WAY down; SAINT especially is kinda like “Hm.” because why on earth would this dude go so far out of his way to nearly die just to save someone who his only interactions with have been filled with vitriol and violence...? (spoiler its cuz Maverick is generally actually a pretty good and selfless guy underneath all the smugness and attitude)
eventually they start teaming up instead of constantly smacking each others’ wrists at every turn, around when the story starts really picking up and said aforementioned Shady Paramilitary Group starts becoming a proper real threat and theyre joined by a whole cast of other characters that i havent drawn yet (Harlan, as well as Leta, an AI programmer who worked on an early iteration of what eventually became SAINT, Jamie, Maverick’s older sister who’s a mechanic/pilot, Eleven, super-hacker extraordinaire, to name a few)
their progression from “kind of awkward friends” to “boyfriends, actually” isnt sth they rlly think about directly, its literally.  theyre both so goddamn STUPID it takes another character pointing out how theyve gone from “he’s fine, we work together pretty well i guess” to “id literally willingly die for this guy at the drop of a hat and also oh yeah i let him have access to some of my tech functions so we can keep better track of and support each other during operations better” for them to be like “wait oh shit oh fuck i might be in love”
THAT GOT SO GODDAMN LONG I LOVE THESE DIPSHITS SO MUCH IM CONSTANTLY BLOWING UP MY OC TWITTER W SHIT ABT THEM....IM TRULY LOST IN THE SAUCE ON THIS ONE... 
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qprbros · 3 years
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Self-indulgent fanon time. This is not to disregard the canon being racist bc the writers did not care, but in fanon I perceive Sam and Dean as. being completely separate from societal prejudice in a way that. can only happen because they’re cis white guys with a ton of non-class based privilege living on the fringes of society.
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tumblunni · 5 years
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Man i really should like... Meticulously go through every single thing i ever watched as a kid and try and find out if there are any other faves i forgot about. It could be fun to draw an ensemble piece of all the science villains in my bigass loving heart! I think warpnik would probably be the most obscure of those tho.
OH wait maybe i just abruptly remembered him cos Maddiman kinda vaguely reminds me of him, sorta? Both got the same weird not-white-guy-pink-but-literal-pink skintone, goofy hair, nasally voice, being strangely adorable, etc.
OH MAN i even remember the plot of his damn episode now! He was robotnik's non evil cousin that he banished to an alternate dimension that ended up turning him mad so he ended up a villain too. SO THATS WHERE MY SQUISKER AND MCKRAKEN HEADCANONS MUST HAVE COME FROM!
And i cant remember anything else about the episode except that even as a kid i found it annoying and rude how they made fun of his speech impediment. Like do you ever hate those voices? Voices where its clearly a badly done parody of some actual voice of some demographic they look down on, and its hard to articulate that you hate the voice but not the real thing its based on, and you also hate the fact theyre mentally associating this intentionally annoying voice with that demographic and reinforcing the idea that their normal voices are also inherantly horrible and funny? I felt that way about this dude and his lisp cos i also have a lisp, but its more often done with the 'cartoon simpleton voice' aka downs syndrome/other disability stereotype, and of course the 'sassy independant black woman who aint need no man' and the 'scary deep voiced black man thug' and the 'ching chong high pitched generic all asian cultures at the same time' goddamn thing. Why was this treated like the height of humor in the 90s and why is it still around today??
Oh also i remember that this dude stuck in my memory so much cos even though he was an antagonist he wasnt really the bad guy. Like he had a very legit reason to hate robotnik and it was just 'whoops sonic and co got caught in the crossfire'. Made me kinda sad that in the end they never set him free from that warp prison dimension place, but he still kinda 'wins' the episode and that was very memorable to me as a kid. Sonic manages to escape while leaving robotnik trapped, and warpnik is like "HELL YEAH REVENGE TIME" and thats just where it ends. So its not really ACTUALLY a proper sympathetic villain plot or anything but it was like baby me's first introduction to the concept of sympathetic villains? I was always used to my fave characters being bad and hated, but this time the guy kinda got a mildly happy ending sorta. Vaguely. Robotnik is just back with no explanation in the next episode cos that show kinda didnt care about sequential storytelling. But hey that leaves room open for me to headcanon that warpnik also managed to escape and he's off somewhere now being like "oh my god i missed the grass and the stars" and yeah maybe he's still kinda 'warped' from the experience but he has a chance of recovery now. Cos seriously even as a seven year old i could see that this dude was a stereotype of mental illness. Like just.. EVERY mental illness. Man, 'comic book crazy' is another trope that i never understood why it was funny and im glad its died.
OH maybe i relate to mad scientists cos i guess the way theyre treated by other characters felt similar to how adults treated us autistic kids???
I dunno man. Maybe theres no reason and i just wish i had a cool science dad/uncle/grandpa cos thats Objectively The Greatest Thing. YOU COULD HAVE SO MANY ADVENTURES TOGETHER!!! and heal his broken heart from traumatic backstory appearances cos WHY DO I KEEP TAKING MINOR FUNNYMANS AND MAKING THEM SAD oh yeah cos Yokai Watch(tm) validated me with that actually being canon for once EVERYONE GO PLAY YOKAI WATCH OK
Dr maddiman best
Dr warpnik almost as best
Its like that 'X walked so Y could run' meme
U gots to wotch the shows of not be screentime to they science gramps tp someday find the thing that do!!!
Man im fuckin hyper
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human-notbeing-blog · 5 years
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[Unedited: same as when written,, ] Seeking out search out for that heavnly realm That unseen That unknown That unseen, yet ever-present Everlasting , Lasting after last thing stuck in this circle Cypher rewind the minors Flow from the water Life from the evil in backwards Hit my duality with some shit Not to fight But to bea a mothafucka and let the helix twist and split The sky's the direction Relax Nothing to worry on being worthy The gift and the 8 above my head Is that love That love That otha water born creation Money for grabs all that cool , but I found myself circling this earth That realm Like thats all what of where im at And thats all im going to Crab walk across the park Paranoud cause theyre making a noise Cave to myself, no entry things and sinister dreams Avail a circle with nothing cause it aint open Finally find what time to understand What is And what the fuck isnt Drink from a different river , The golden halo Head so far from , inner isnt Splitting my own atoms Nah none more of that Control of Earthly habits To achieve more of the Earth? Give up all that shit to recieve it all In the ending Cause on that alpha shiy I wouldnt be shit Wouldnt be shit Wouldnt exist So what makes me think 3 snakes Instead of 2 Wanting more So more on repeat But I wasnt the mothafucka that brought me into this world and I'm that brotherfucker that tried to bring myself out of it 6times On count on repeat dracula Breathing ivacuated Incasipated Cant write or speak as fast as these thoughts What is this Something I dont know Something I dont want Now its unfamiliar Yet its been the same face ive been starin at for 4 years straight Straight jacket eight ball kickin a window in Made of a million pieces All decieved in decease Come to rest at best at peace Mothafucka I need more than these Days of dark sand In my hand Recieve it all in the downfall My own downfall, where I draw the bottom, where I let go of it all Jump into the loop That halo realm beyond you Beyond everything as purpose cant be nothing , only on something on this direction, thesw worries, this stance of endeavor Going out the same way I came in , hoping to be Starring into its gold to see Beginning where it starts, of that (The things he put , the fire , the heat, the elements , the alchemy) That pure shit of what I was really lookin for Molly hit my temple damn pure Take enough until you find that answrr im talking about The enptiness Took another 3 and some to look up after from the aftermath of that empty hands earthly trends going in circles around Finding the answer keeping that shit for me Thats the key So I thiught so i think therefore i am To everything to udneratand On my own my shit my own Have evrrything Entreprise to stay alive Keepin me breathin maybe But it created the things of this life outta fear Circled more for a vulture such as me Eat ate Kill to mistake Forgive never forget Holding onto something That ill never forget Cause thats where I was stancing when I wanted to ge5 ahead And its been there every since Past particle living listening more ceaseless than my tweakin car livin days Throwin seeds like atta fat bitch from a weddin for fun Cause I got nothin but this gun And somethin for my head now . maybe Mothafucka just tryna spread Like the one million of the sperm That made a brothalova like you And if i aint the same lava pour over me Cause ive been a mothafucka since the pompeii days Before prehistoric before the sage Yeah twitchclenchin fool Thats what im really looking for Thats what ive really been searching for Thats what time is To me alreast My dude , my dawg In that trust that it rains In the name of myself . in the name of going the distance in a consistence A direction thats directed by your realm heavenly . only . of . possibility . doors i dont know . havent heard . havent seen . Release that fuckin devil . that sin . Keep me in your bed . finally in between . Floating from it Like the polarity i want most . why twist my own helix like my nips This I want living more Like this I want this gold given . spread gifted . lifted . nothing to repeat of self as its no longer a race Its an assembly to stack up the lift up more Induldge in your beauty Damn youre a fuckin beauty No paranoia Wont annoy yah No more breathing heevin heavy worrying about my mindset steady no more . Somwthing of yours Nothibg of mine thats im used to Adjusted to control perfect Rash on my foreskin tryna craft a flow Something theyd appreciate Ill get it once I let get off all of it All of that All of caring Hit the bottom so i hit the heavens Yeah . mothalova . peace man fuzz . something thats worth to keep consistent Thats worth to live Cause ill only appreciate what i find when im not really that into lookin at how it would be to get and what leprocauhn bitch inside look like Heaven point of vision seeing down Like i got my 12 from 6 complete Kundalini a devil on my way up No fear on me days these slut please Find my worries on consewuences on that river you tryna find me dead Twisted my nips for hours too long . no food no sleep . Hit that g spot . my g spot . her g cavity never felt gravity till now spot sweet . From faith . from wanting it more . to making it that vision . that layer overall . overees of me make my ovaries overeasy please . Dont worry about how keep that outco e consistent As its something thats His. And I know at Any time Any Time At Any I can have it Just bathe in the things he placed here Just like you Dont gotta worry gotta bitch bout nothin Cause I know deep down From that beginning Innocent as its ever been . infant freedom set free . gave me a taste . For this plane earthly . Placed maybe for the grow i dunno Not suppose to 2 sheets 2 weeks deep tryna figure that out Edge of insanity brink of death 9pm park bench Found it Found it as its been in that The very thing ive been blocking off Thats been missing Ive been on my own mission Make that shit happen Now harder faster Fuck myself in the ass in that order That pattern that pace Ste face when in asking for more Mothafuck . ive been here to explore As ive ever been And its been the same shit 24 Cause ive been wanying what im having what im doing on the 7 Slip me the drug hidden . cause im fuckin spittin out this poison . shit. This is it . The mother the father the son and your holy spirit . hope to be within me . As you once were always were in my youth . always have been . waiting for me to see what the path is . standing at the end . like a true parent that i wish i could say i had . that i have . accept them . as human as me . as i am . Human being lookin for nothing but the all you are Fuck all the answers I wanna wake to you in the morning time Reborn spirits of me something i never planned to be . Dont give a shit if im gum on a seat stumbled As long as im living a life granted from yours . Life given from your purpose Passed given handed off Fuck . im getting off Quit to sput but quicker to spill off Pretend im something nothing but a ghost Hope for you to see Something bigger better be better be than i be So I can be Fuckdickdogshit Walkin head down Grown from the devil Because I never knew my 6 to grew To grow from Motherfuck this airplane semi lsedupsychedalic automatic trip to drift off to space outer and its that shit Simulation White box nothing blinded by appeal Fuck a bitch , we all know it aint real But big dick sexy camel golden shine waxed as the bills to be Blood on his teeth Cause mothafucka thats the test Thats the faith i gotta have Not in but against Fuckin bitch thats the test . Thats the test . Thats the test . Fucking wake up before I do . Before I fuckin did . Dont be dead as I ever was . Or you know the next best man to be unseen . yet on the surface, only on the surface , as it stops at to co-exis-be. Respect and love you cause we just met my b . Smell some heaven on this earth from endowed doused in the middle thing The middle man named grace Hit my face on some ecstacy Better than All those reasons All those reasons Ive ever been Cause its the consistent . Its in it . and its that . Gifted as tourettes already lifted . Part of rhe ground . part of the earth . part of the test . alwats knew . Break into the sky . last peace . Hear this shit before i die . Please . cause im you in another life somehow . And all this sound . all this drought . all these clouds . Knowing . wanting . breathing . living . existing . to the shining light Wanting more Seems to be absolute right? No wrong . not fooling me. I know that shit . thats i want . get off my back. I know my realty . nothing else dont . as angle makes my own . me too . 2 of me . Some of them . want something . want something to be to be something . Could be Only could be Look at the want of more . the fear of its piece . Thats what it was. Always was . Carefully step my friend . I kmow youre not paving this path for paun . At all . simple to breathe but deeper to feel defeated Dont wait for these days of my broken . hopeless . homeless . paranoia . going nowhere. to see it . 8:13pm - 8:37pm - 9:03pm 05-06-2019
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queencryo · 5 years
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@silly-go-round is asleep right now.
i guess i should make a journal for the past few days. as good a time as any. as AMY. heh. cuz shes super good and amazing. heh.
uh...... lessee.... for the two days after the last journal i just. hung out at the house while silly worked. i managed to not keep her in bed and make her late the second day. hung out a lot, watched more adventure time, worked on my tumblr filter script (lie. i judt ran it on my main. 200 posts / day is a bitchhhh) , played a good amount of ds3 (to pointof tetris effect at a couple points the nexg few days)
also did some like. helpful tasks. washed some dishes (undone quicklu, but. eh). not enough, mot as much as i shouldve, but... i tried i guess.
alao we've like. said the same thing at the dame time a Lot while ive been here and its like. nice. its really nice. same wavelength! i feel so close go her.
oh! alxo night before last we went grocery shoping. got food for prolly enoygh for the two weeks, but i guess we'll see. also a cheesecake! it was.... echausting. hily fuck it was exhaysting. jesus. the store was big and it took like 3 hours and $200 to get everything but. we did itttt.
we both mentionef that like. it felt nice to like. have a full fridge 2gether. cuz. it feels like were gonna have a futjre togetjer? u know. like that is. i love her a lot and it feels good for this to feel like a home for a little while. we hope that it can be so in tbe future.
so YESTERDAY she finally FINALLY taught me how to play magic the gathering. it was. a long time coming. but she brought me into the store and like. sat me down w some regulars and had me play commander. i played moooostly her snake deck, so like.that was fun!! i kept talki g about how i woulda gotten lorescale Coatl up to 39/39 and flying, had i like. gotten q more turn. but on that game D was running a mill deck that was. extremely long to play (that game took like ~>2 hours ugh), and was very bery annoying, so i didnt get to actually do that.
but it was fun! part of me wants to blog everything, but i dont think i will.
im glad to be able to use silly's decks, bc i dont think i want to make my own. im considering making a cheap angel deck or smth, but we'll see if yhat actually ends up happening.
i also met her girlfriend Iz, who is sweet. i played magic w her fkr a while, which was fun! she was runni g an annoying mono black deck (i kkow all these... these Terms and Words now, its incredible...)
shes sweet and i think i like her. dunno if enough to date yet (which makes me Partially regret flirting w her so much in the groupchat but. hey)
talked w her some, mostly about magic, hung out while silly closed the store, pet her cat, silly discovered that cyddling w TWO girlfriends is very nice (not rhat id know ;;;;;;;), was good times. i dont think im as comfy w izzy physically yet as i may have implied in messages, which hopefully wull be rectified by the message i just sent her (my initial physical comfort with people varies, it depends very much on the person)
skip forward, me and silly make a pizza at home cuz were fuckin tired, she admonishes me for not eating for uh... like 11 hours or smth (that mornings bagel was VERY good tho omg), but adderall, so like... meh.
uh... i dont think anything else on yesterday...
today! we waaamted to go to the store at like. 2. but in actuality got there at like! 330.
i went back to sleep cuz im a losenerd, and she. made this breakfast casserole thing. which hse put into a bagel abd brought to me bc i guess shes the best person on the entire earth oh my GOD. jesus
skip... apparently she knows maximum the hormone and doesnt like them very much... fair fair. (cause for xeath)
came to the store agai. tofay. it was fun and good. iz didnt come in today, do played some more with regulars. played w what is apparently called a blink deck, which revolvea arounf exiling cards then immediately bringing them back, to capitalize on "when this enters battlefield, do smth" cards. neat!
i DID actually manage to win today!!! the victory was. literally handed to me, but like. thats fine! i was playing silly's uhhh... elintor the masked? idr her name :( the mask planewalker! deck, which. i had SO much land, most of wh8ch was enchanfed. meaning it could be tapped then untapped w eljntor's thing, then tapped again for DOUBLE MANA. i mean. i had like 9/turn even b4 that but. BUT. i also had. i think i drew 3 creatures total. bit anyway. i had the white card that gave me a life whenever a creature was put on tge board (and also, w another enchantment, made all non-me creagurss and enchantments enter the board tapped, so. nya). so... rob had a card what dealt one damGe to all other players whenevr he puta. creature on the board. then he played united forces, which lets each player commit X mana to create X 1/1 soldier tokens on all players' boards. so. we made 28 white soldier tokens on everyones board. this killed perry, ans gave me, uh. 56 life (84 - 28). i then attacked ron for 28 w the soldiers, and drew sacred mesa, which lets me sacrifice 2 mana (1 any color, 1 white, but i had so many cards that said "this land can instead be tapped for 2 of any color, so like. ueah) to create a 1/1 flying pegasus token. so i. ended the game w 44 white 1/1 tokens. goblins get fucked.attack w my ssoldiers cuz his were tapped, so brought him down to 7 life. i didng catch what he did w the enchantment, but i think he said he like. put a copy of every creature on my side of the board onto his board, and then. cipying that enchantment 3 times. so. holy FUCK. wow. BUT those all came in tapped and i had 18 flying yokens, so. i still won! yay!!!! i won a game of magic!!!!!
goblin decks scare me. stop running krenko you fucks. exponential goblins goddamn
silly would come by every so often and like. look over my dhoulder and say "oh that was dumb whyd u use fabricate for thay" which is fair. but also god i love her. (i used fabricate for a mana generator insteaf of lightning greaves. whateverrrr) i love her so much dear god. i wish i coukd help w the store more, but. on the same time i also. dont enjoy working. so. maybe part time.
hm. what ekse. oh yeah i kove her so much.
by the end of the night it was just. me and her, rob and the two regulars i started out llaying w yestwrday. theyre sweet, i like them. theyre married. the dude calls me honey smtimes, which is. kinda weird? dunno how i feel about that. i guess fine. its gender-nice, but still a lil uncomfy. otherwise i like em fien, though. but they talked abouy moving into sillys apt. so thats cool!! better than her current (awful, terrible, lazy / horrifically depressed / manchild roomate, who doesnt clean ever) roomate. i was reading the monster of the week gamebook thruout, which i... bought, for some reason. idk. oh also i wanna make a fallen angel divine, because im... predictableeee. also a conspiracy thworist whos just a trans woman w way too much time and really weird hobbies (throwing knices, butterfly knife, net friends, etc). also a spooky. i speny like. 3 hours reading thr7 the monster of the week book while ppl played magic around me. i kinda wish i hadnt bought it, but hey! its neat c:
oh, also i didnt take adderall today. i dont think it went toooo bad, i think i like. was meaner and less thohghtful with what i said, but like. i guess thats better than feared. i took a caffeine pill (200mg) at ariund 10 which is. prolly why im wide awake right now. i regret doing that, sincr from what shes said tmos gonna be big)
she says we gotta be at her moms by 4, for reasons she WONT TELL ME. bit she says its part of one of her plans, i ASSUME the romantic one? im kind of afraid that ill like. no-sell it unwillingly because im abroke and soulless human being, but uh. i guess rhats thw risks we take to be alive :shrug: im excited. were also going to a shop (diff one) tmo, which im Quite excited for, as ive only been in similar shops by accident before. also doing laundry!!! which is important ^_^
oh ysah. so we got white castle on the way home. its. yeah she was r8ght. mediocre-at-best sliders. onions are bad.
we also made a pizza. whifh i ate most of. i overate. sob.
she fell asleep halfway thry an episode of nailed it. cant blame her, she seemed really tired. i hipe i dont disturb her rwst. and i feel so utterly blessed thay i can be around her.
ih!! i also fell down the last few staies ywstersay. bruised my arms, but otherwise fine. it was. idk, it is nice to knoe that others worry fir me and like me. she was very concerned. i love her.
5 notes · View notes
i-amusemyself · 7 years
Note
All the asks.
Aaaaah tysm!!!!!
Sunrise or sunset?
Sunset. I prefer the colours and also not being awake so early!
Are you mentally ill?
Yeah I have depression but whatevs
Are you physically ill?
Chronically my dude. I have IBS and EDS type 3
What is the most expensive thing you have bought?
A plane ticket for nearly £1000 lmao! It took me working 3 jobs for over a year but it was worth it.
Do you have a job?
Not atm but I’ll get one in a few months. 
Are you in school?
Noooooo!! I finally finished sixth form in June. I’m finally free!! (I’m so happy I won’t have to see half those people again ngl)
Are you a dropout?
Nah
Are you in college?
Assuming this means uni, then no, but I will be in october.
Introvert or extrovert?
I have?? No idea?? I’m shy af and really quiet but I do like meeting new people.
What do you think when you look at your body?
I don’t really think much at all anymore, which is an improvement tbh. I just sort of see it but don’t process it.
What have others said when they look at your body?
I’ve had a lot of not-so-supportive comments about my body from a lot of people. Most people tell me I’m too thin, that I’m unattractive, that I should get surgery for one reason or another. Idk. I don’t expect much more tbh.
Do you have a particular song that you feel deeply?
Hoo boi I have a whole playlist of songs that mean something to me.
Talk about a time in your life where you have felt most alive?
It was 2, maybe 3 weeks ago now XD I was roadtripping around America with my best friend @only-slightly-dangerous and it was the happiest I’ve ever been. We were care free and the world was beautiful and there were so many new things to see and do. I wish I was back there.
Are you confident wearing a bikini?
Not at all, I’ll avoid it at all costs.
Can you look people in the eyes while talking?
See, I don’t have a conscious issue with it. I don’t mind eye contact that much. But I usually subconsciously end up looking away, especially if I’m thinking deeply about something/trying to remember something.
Has anything terrible happened to you?
Depends on your definition of terrible. But yeah, a couple of things have really fucked me up.
Has anything wonderful happened to you?
I met the best person in my life at the worst time in my life. The chances of it happening were ridiculously slim; I still can’t get my head around it.
Favorite part of your personality?
I don’t know. My patience or my sense of humor?
Least favorite part of your personality?
How easily I become jealous of others. Or maybe my need to be in control. I’m working on both of them though.
Favorite part of your body?
....my legs? I’m told theyre p good?
Least favorite part of your body?
Maybe my face? Maybe my chest. Idk, I don’t critique it often.
Favorite quote?
“The sun will rise and we will try again”. There are others I like, but that’s the first that comes to mind.
Do you have friendships with all genders?
I have a crippling fear of men so most my close friends are with girls. Though again, I’m working on it.
Do you have a good relationship with your father?
I didn’t used to so much, but I think it’s improved a lot over the past few years.
Do you have a good relationship with your mother?
It’s complicated. I don’t really wanna go into it rn
Do you have a good relationship with your siblings?
I don’t have any sibs, kinda wish I did though
Have you ever been hurt physically or mentally by a family member?
Yuuup
Have you ever had a near death experience?
Nope
Do you know anyone who has taken their own life?
Yeah. I used to talk to a girl on here and for months we held a pact of staying alive for each other. But she gave up (I kind of understood though). That was rough.
Have you ever tried to take your own life?
...whatever I answer this with feels like a lie
Biggest lie you have told?
I canny remember lmao
Do you follow any conspiracies?
I haven’t read much into many conspiracies, ngl. But there was something strange about how those twin towers fell down...
Do you believe in a New World Order?
Never heard of it. Gonna google it though.
Do you respect your government and the way your country is run?
Not at all. The tories can kiss my butt. They’re barely human.
Is there currently any strife in your country?
Meh, nothing too bad.
Have you ever been displaced within your country?
Nope, thankfully.
Are your friendships healthy?
The ones I have left are lmao! I’ve been doing a lot of cutting off in the past year, but it seems to have worked out pretty well.
Are you currently fighting with a friend?
No
Are you jealous of a friend? Why?
No. Their achievements don’t diminish my own. I want them all to succeed.
Do you believe in the Illuminati?
As much as I’m here for the meme, I don’t actually know much about it.
Do you think any celebrities are associated with the Illuminati? Who?
See previous.
How can people tell you are nervous?
Um, I don’t know. I try not to let on. Depending on the situation I might ask a lot of questions about it or just be very talkative in general. Also not being able to sit still.
How can people tell you are sad?
I don’t tend to talk as much or with as much enthusiasm. I also tend to “zone out” a lot if I’m feeling really down. Sometimes I’ll just give up on conversations all together and refuse to make any more effort than the other person is doing.
Do you ever express your true feelings?
I...think so. Yeah. I sometimes dilute them when I express them, but I rarely keep a feeling contained completely. That destroys me.
Regrets in your life?
Not standing up for myself more.
Achievements in your life?
I won a couple of things when I was younger (basketball tournaments, painting competitions) also I do well in school ig?
What did people say about you in school?
I mean, I’m sure I never heard all of it. The general consensus seemed to be everyone hated me for being “stuck up” and for doing okay at tests. Idk. 
What did you say about people in school?
Depended on the person lmao! I wasn’t a big fan of many people in my year, but I didn’t really hate any of them as much as they thought.
Is there something you have never told anyone?
yh
Have you committed an illegal act?
I mean, piracy, that’s it.
If you had two days to spend one million dollars how would you spend it?
I’d buy a house somewhere nice, a plane ticket and a holiday. Then I’d give a decent amount to everyone I know. The rest I’d give to charity.
What were your aspirations at age 5, 10, 15, 18?
I cant even remember what my aspirations were yesterday?? I’ve pretty much always wanted to do something to do with science, though it’s varied which parts of it.
Describe your first kiss? Was it how you imagined?
It aint happened.
Growing up were you in a wealthy, average, or low income household?
Low to average I’d say? My mums a single parent but we do okay.
Are you from a broken marriage?
My parents are divorced yah
Have you been raised by a solo parent?
Sort of? Officially speaking yeah.
Do you know both your parents?
Yup
What colour eyes, hair and skin do you have?
Brown eyes, blonde hair and white skin.
Have you abused drugs or alcohol?
No. I’ve drunk when I probably should have just talked about my feelings though.
What languages can you speak?
I speak english and a reasonable level of spanish. I’m also learning danish atm.
Do you conform to your societies standards?
Idk, I guess not.
Do you cry often?
Lmao, a lot more often than most people yeah. I’ve a very emotional person.
Do you tell people what you think of them?
Only the good parts.
Are you comfortable accepting compliments?
Not at all, it always feels like a lie.
Are you comfortable giving compliments?
Oh yeah! If I’m thinking something good about someone I’ll let them know!
Is any mental illness hindering your life?
Depression. It’s a bugger.
Is any physical illness hindering your life?
To a normal person it might seem it, but I’ve just kind of adapted to my illnesses so I can live life as normally as possible now.
Do you keep up with current events?
I try to I suppose. I haven’t so much recently though ngl.
What’s the latest news in the world you have heard/read?
This feels like a test....idk
What have you done today?
Slept, eaten, watched netflix, scrolled through tumblr.
Do you sleep well?
Sometimes
Do you sleep badly?
Sometimes
Have you ever hurt anyone because you were hurting?
Who on earth remembers their past with such clarity?? I mean, it’s possible yeah. But I couldn’t tell you who or when and it’s not something I’m proud of.
Has anyone ever hurt you because they were hurting?
Search me. That isn’t usually the first thing I ask someone when they hurt me.
Have you ever had to end a friendship/relationship? Why?
Yeah, a couple. Especially friendships if people have been more trouble than they’re worth and they’ve become someone who regularly hurts me.
Have you ever stopped someone from hurting themselves?
I’ve talked a few people down from suicide, but I don’t know how many of them are doing rn unfortunately.
Has anyone ever stopped you from hurting yourself?
My best friend.
Do you like your laugh?
I don’t hate it, but I do worry it annoys other people.
Are you preparing for an apocalypse? And what kind?
Lmfao no I’m not prepared for anything!! 
Do you have any funny family stories?
Not really, not that I can remember. 
Are you religious?
Nah
Do you like to watch true crime shows or movies?
Yeah lmao, ngl I love a good true crime show
Are you interested in cults?
...I guess I wouldn’t be adverse to finding out more about them
Would you like to raise a family in your country?
I mean, it wouldn’t be the worst place in the world to do it, but I plan on moving to another country before I consider doing that.
List some things you wanted in your childhood but never got?
I don’t know?? I was just grateful for the things I did have.
Is there a large age gap between you and a sibling?
Lmfao yeah 18 years and counting
Are you from a blended family?
Yup
Do you believe in marriage? Why/Why not?
Yeah I once saw a married person with my own two eyes.
What is the nicest thing anyone has said to you?
“You are my favourite person.”
Do you keep a journal?
In a way? I have a blog that acts as a journal and also a scrapbook
Would anyone be hurt by reading it?
Probably. I think about that a lot.
Do you have children?
Nope
Have you been pregnant?
Nopety nope
List your favorite movies?
In no particular order:
-Deadpool  -My Sisters Keeper  -Mamma Mia    -Hot Fuzz   -The Life of Brian  -The Lovely Bones    -Pitch Perfect 2
List your favorite people?
They know who they are.
Talk about the birthmarks and scars on your body?
Umm, I have a birthmark on my neck which I always think would be cool if it showed how I died in a previous life. 
Do you look after yourself?
Most of the time yeah
Do you put yourself or others first?
I put others first almost all the time. I couldn’t bare not to.
Are you happy today?
I mean,,, I was cut open and zipped back up 2 days ago so I’ve felt better lmao! 
Are you loved?
Contrary to what my anxiety wants me to believe, I think I actually might be by a few people.
1 note · View note
bythepowerof4 · 7 years
Text
clea and nick and a very confusing two day argument @nickatnightwalker
[during daisy’s 420 dash shenanigans]
bythepowerof4nnnno dont encourage her this is bad
nickatnightwalkerim encouraging her to be distracted byh being queen of something clea
bythepowerof4noooooo i dont think its gonna work like that shell just try harder
or maybe not i dontt fucking know i dont know anything
nickatnightwalkersame my guy but it was a chance i was willing to take on behalf of all of us
bythepowerof4ok sure great fingers crossed whatEVER
we are all sooo super grateful
nickatnightwalkeroh this is worse
bythepowerof4that wasnnt even a goov fucking burn
bythepowerof4that was so LAME and she thinks she s so SMART and i hate her
and i dont wanna talk about it actually how are you
nickatnightwalkeri am
dying
bythepowerof4Great
nickatnightwalkeri would have gray hair by now if it were possible for me to have melanin
bythepowerof4youre not helping though!!!!! uoure engaging!!!!!
noo ok not my business
this is meant to be chill i want to be chill
nickatnightwalkerjus wait till the bowl goes around again
nickatnightwalkeri was trying to distract her you kmnow thats the only way to stop the daisymobile
bythepowerof4thats not fair you know thats not fair
nickatnightwalkerwhat waiting for the bowl or the daisymobile
bythepowerof4Both duh
nickatnightwalkeryes i know, and, also unfair that this is happening on 420 day or our lord and savior snoop
bythepowerof4its not fair that we have to deal with this whether it happens or not wee could just like walk away from the weird passive aggressive blogging ccrcle right now if we so chose
yeah????
because this isnt FUN nickolas it is not
nickatnightwalkeri personally am having a loads of fun messing with ines
you have to dea l with everything when it happens so this is just a thign
bythepowerof4oh cool great youre just as bad fantastic news
nickatnightwalkerok i did no t and have not publicly read anybody out yet to date
i only do that privatley and only when it suits me
bythepowerof4:/
://////
bythepowerof4look at u ur being a dick right niw!!!!
nickatnightwalkeroh what to ines
im screwing with her
shes trying to fight me
bythepowerof4because this is soo the best way to deal with that sort of situation
nickatnightwalkerits just funny idk why shes getting all snaked out of shape
bythepowerof4"hot" you dick????
Youre both being gross now stop it!!!
nickatnightwalkera joke
a JOKE
shes a lesiabn
also just like
no
bythepowerof4its not FUNNY nick
neither of you are funny its weird and annoying and embarrassing
nickatnightwalkershe wants ot punch me bc i sias d bite me
i dondt really feel like imobligagated to take her seriously anymore
besides shes a shit so no t only is it funny to watch her blow a gasket over the same google image snatched pic i also like pissing her off
bythepowerof4u arent obligated to fight w her either but ur doing that,, a lot
idk
Im not making sense
nickatnightwalkerthis is brely a fight
[nothing until nick sends the photo]
bythepowerof4im not mad at you and im not mad at her so can you not tag team revenge for once in your fucking life
we're having an almost genuine conversation for once without you interjecting to make fun of me and pretend play matchmaker for shits and giggles so can you please, please cut it out
nickatnightwalkerim not making fun of you
nickatnightwalkerif i was making fun of you itd be a lot meaner
you should be flattered i even considereed encourragign you to go for daisy
[next day]
bythepowerof4hey!! how are you feeling haha, is ur hair still going grey
bythepowerof4im not trying to act like nothing is bad btw i just wanted to start it off nice sorry :/
nickatnightwalkermy hair's moved past being gray and now it's black, so im inadvertently copying misha again
bythepowerof4lmao this is some goth power play shit love it
nickatnightwalkerwhite haired twink is out 2008 gerard way is in
bythepowerof4as it should be!! do you need eyeliner like i don't have any but it would really make the Look
nickatnightwalkerwhy would i need that when i have dry erase markers to just apply liberally to my face
bythepowerof4so resourceful?? pinterest diy that shit
bythepowerof4we can raid the art rooms, get some glue while we're at it and cut a big chunk out of your hair gel budget
nickatnightwalkerdanger with that is potentially overgluing and making it fragile and breakable like glass
bythepowerof4glass bones and paper skin and glass hair also. got it
i mean youre pretty protective of it already i doubt anyone would notice the difference!!
nickatnightwalkerevery morning i break my legs getting out of bed
bythepowerof4do your heart attacks put you to sleep bc i know that feeling
nickatnightwalkeryeah thats why i sleep like four separate times a day
bythepowerof4and i thought that was just a #relateableteen thing
bythepowerof4so not to be weird but is this like. Chilly lackluster banter or are you actually not mad at me
nickatnightwalkerno im pissed
bythepowerof4ok
can i ask why
nickatnightwalkeri mean well first ya came at me for fucking with you which
like i said
i do but it's obvious
then you were a shit to daisy
so
thats that
bythepowerof4iiii mean. you said you wouldnt do that anymore. and then you did. i was just upset
and im sorry about daisy, i told her that too
bythepowerof4like really sorry!!
i just think its weird that someone can say, threaten to kill her and call her a bitch all the time
and youll date him
but i cant get a little upset when we're all high and im having a super stressful few days!!
nickatnightwalkerdo what anymore
bythepowerof4fuck with me
about her
nickatnightwalkerim not
i havent been
bythepowerof4you did though
bythepowerof4like what else was that picture
nickatnightwalkeryou said she was weird and creepy and i sent a picture of her being cute and sweet
bythepowerof4i said she was ACTING weird and creepy which objectively is an accurate description for someone talking about throbbing tentacle dicks and using the word "quivering" in relation to the nether regions of the girl they beat up for fun
but like, what do i know
i dont think shes weird and creepy and thats not what that photo was about im not an idiot
nickatnightwalkerlisten i frankly think everyone needs to reserve their judgment on the moire and daisy situation because it's clearly very complex and beyond the comprehension of mortal men and none of our fucking business to judge one way or another and, yknow, imho, moire has gills and misha smells like magic and youre 4d so maybe also reserve your fucking judgment on who's weird around here anyway
bythepowerof4i know thats why i apologized
nickatnightwalkershe can say shit like that and still be cute and sweet
bythepowerof4but like i said, high and upset and still getting used to this, so u can forgive me for one slip up surely
nickatnightwalkershe contains motherfucking multitudes
bythepowerof4thats not what you were saying though!! you didnt say that
you sent me a picture trying to make me jealous or something, just like she was saying, because obviously i cant have a private conversation with either one of you
nickatnightwalkerif youre jealous thats your problem
bythepowerof4im NOT
you both keep acting like i am thats not fair!!!
nickatnightwalkeri wasnt youre the one who's fixated on it
dont believe i ever said the j word
bythepowerof4i didnt either!! she did!!!
im not fixated on anything i just want to be able to talk to you without you making it about her all the time
nickatnightwalkerweve occasionally talked about more than daisy im p sure
bythepowerof4:/ you know what i meant
nickatnightwalkerwell this IS about her whether you think im continually screwing with you in some single minded attempt to torment you or not
and im not a fan of someone who says theyre her friend telling her shit like that
bythepowerof4i said SORRY it happens ok!!! i feel really awful about it why do you think i was so upset yesterday?
nickatnightwalkeri dont know dude i was baked
bythepowerof4i didnt know that specific thing upset her so much bc no one gave me a rule book for this shit and im never gonna do it again
nickatnightwalkerok cool
im also deciding rightnow this second i dont care if you believe why i sent the picture or not because youre so dead set on me trying to fuck with you ill never change your mind
and for the record
damians never called her a bitch again
nickatnightwalkerand if he tried to kill her, id be more concerned about scraping enough of him up off the sidewalk to fill a bucket
bythepowerof4youre not even gonna try to understand why i might think that
like i could tell you if u gave enough of a shit to listen yeah
nickatnightwalkeris poor self esteem and daisys difficulty with dropping her persona not the right answer
bythepowerof4not quite but thhanks
for that
nickatnightwalkerthats usually what it is
bythepowerof4ok just. Listen for a sec without jumping in to insult me yeah
bythepowerof4the two of you like, obviously tell each other everything. like u straight up reference shit shes obviously told u n vice versa
and that makes it weird cause it feels like im never talking to just you and thats why its weird when u bring her up bc its like, why wouldnt u just tell her whatever i say!!!
bythepowerof4and u keep saying i have a shot w her and telling me how to impress her when i just wanted to brag about winning chicken it didnt have to be a THING u know???
bythepowerof4but like!!! if ur saying that then she knows and it makes it weird!!! like you do that even when you said youd stop and then she accuses me of being jealous of moire and then you immediately send that picture and u can see how i might think it was a fucking team effort
yeah?????
bythepowerof4its weird and intimidating and im not even friends with her i was obviously fooling myself about that but i thought i was friends with you
like not youtwo as a unit or whatever fake setting me up
ok im done but that was stupid so whatever
nickatnightwalkerwell like 1. i dont tell her everything
i know hard concept but just because we talk about a lot of shit which is, yknow, what one does with friends, it doesnt mean we talk about everything
nickatnightwalkerfor instance: didnt know she said you were jealous of moire
bythepowerof4ok
bythepowerof4i believe you im obviously not that big a deal for u guys to bother talking abt me fine
but u can at least see how i might think that given ur whole thing is acting like ur joined at the hip and ganging up on ppl
u know
nickatnightwalkerwait do you want us to talk about you or not clea
nickatnightwalkershe was upset so she told me, i was pissed so i gave you photographic evidence
of the contrary imean
if i know everything about her then when i say youve got a shot i really think im in the best position to be calling that
bythepowerof4thats the problem!! Bc i clearly dont have a shot we dont even talk that much bc i dont even know how to talk to her and that makes it seem like ur pulling it out of ur ass!
nickatnightwalkereither i know everything about her or i dont make up your mind truong
bythepowerof4youre missing the point ok
nickatnightwalkerif the point isnt me giving you the run around to fuck with you not sure what the point is then
bythepowerof4oh my god
nickatnightwalkeris that not literally what you just said
bythepowerof4that is youre just getting bogged down in dumb shit im saying!!
nickatnightwalkeror dyou have your planes in a knot over us telling each other things like, information, like, sharing information about our lives
bythepowerof4stop that i dont give a shit about how the two of you act i just want you to get that its scary!! and it makes it hard for me and you expect me to be so good at this that the second i fuck up youre coming at methis hard
nickatnightwalkerof course i am shes my best friend and youre her friend so it's way worse than some rando ragging on her
bythepowerof4youre MY friend youre like my best friend here because im a fucking mess and youre getting personal about this and its upsetting me it doesnt have to be this intense???
nickatnightwalkerhurting daisy is always gonna be personal clea
nickatnightwalkerand i get you apologized and thats cool and that could be that but to the best of my fucking understanding im not giving you false hope and tbqh honestly, to be honest, actually, youre a decent fucking person and i have a strong preference that daisy go on coffee dates with someone whos not gonna knock her teeth out of her fucking head
bythepowerof4youre that invested and youve never said a single thing to her about it??
do you see how i might come to doubt that
nickatnightwalkeryeah and what the fuck would i say sorry but your weird hate crush kinda gives me the heebs have you ever considered not acting on that and trying to be relatively normal and healthy instead
bythepowerof4so what i have to do everything
nickatnightwalkeridk if youve noticed this but she doesnt really know what shes doing a lot of the time when shes talking to people so you know how i was talking about effort:: reward? thats where that comes in
bythepowerof4thats not fair
you could have just told her that thing you just said instead of pinning the work on other people without even telling them
nickatnightwalkergenerally speaking i try not to reveal daisys weaknesses to new acquaintances
bythepowerof4thats still not fair
do u even like me or are you seriously just trying to set her up with the least murderous person here
nickatnightwalkerif i didnt like you i wouldnt care if you were the least murderous person here
besides i dont get how you think us talking to each other is weird but you expect me to run interference in every single one of her friendships like, hey, just a heads up, shes got trouble finding the off button on the snarky attitude
like hell wingmanning you is pretty much the limit of what i can justify
bythepowerof4i dont expect you to do anything ive told you plenty of times that that shouldnt be your job
youre the one whos apparently been trying to invent a friendship where there isnt one?? forgive me for feeling kind of skeeved
nickatnightwalkeri was under the impression that you WERE friends
not sure when you stopped being friends actually
i KNOW shes doing her best to be less
bad
around you
bythepowerof4:/
nickatnightwalkerwhat
bythepowerof4i didnt wanna say "relationship" tbh bc there definitely isnt one of those
nickatnightwalkeroh haha relatable but look
i saw something good happening there with regards to daisy makin a human connection and i was trying my motherfucking utmost to encourage it
bythepowerof4ok but. its not a genuine human connection if youre there right
thats not very organic its just uncomfortable and confusing
i appreciate your help i guess but it was clearly more for her benefit than mine and that doesnt feel great?
nickatnightwalkerim not like lurking behind coffee machines im not actually THERE
and of course it's more for her benefit i didnt even know you
bythepowerof4i mean the second it went south you were, there, actually,
oh wow
thanks
nickatnightwalkerman youre not gonna pick me over like, your brother or something i dont see how this is shocking
besides
daisys
a good person to be friends with
bythepowerof4i mean sure but im still a bit caught up in you picking me out of a lineup like oh theyll do!!
nickatnightwalkerwhat line up
she likes you
bythepowerof4ok this part for once is not about her
well a little bit but listen
i thought we were friends because you thought i was nice and wanted to be
aka nothing to do with daisy
nickatnightwalkerwell like
yeah
that kinda helped your case though i guess
bythepowerof4no im sorry but that makes it weird
bythepowerof4that you befriended me for her sake and the second i pissed her off you trashed me for it like all im good for is bringing out the good in her
thats stupid??
nickatnightwalkeroh my god you have terrible reading comprehension
step 1.  we got to be friends
bythepowerof4ok we're back at insilts great!!!
nickatnightwalkershhh just shhh for like a second im breaking itdown alright
step 1. we got to be friends
step 2. you and daisy are also sort of friendsish
step 3. i encourage this shit because shes trying and youre pretty alright
step 4.  youre yelling at me for leading you on and befriending you to like lure you to daisy or some shit because i apparently just psychically knew you were ok
dont remember if we started talking because you were already talking to daisy so i figure that says something
bythepowerof4thats not what you just said but fine
bythepowerof4if im so wrong about all of this then im sorry for misunderstanding
nickatnightwalkerno it is what i just said
being friends with me first helped your case re me backing you up since i knew you werent a dick
bythepowerof4fine!!! ok i get it i just apologized
i cant help not getting stuff sometimes i figure u would get that being friends with daisy and all
but youre just saying all thise mean shit to upset me and not even feeling bad about it apparently
nickatnightwalkerlisten i really hand to god dont know what things youre talking about right now
doing it for daisy over you?  like
i knew you enough to know youre alright but daisy is daisy
bythepowerof4ok well yesterday, for one, with the "you should be flattered" bullshit
bythepowerof4and u were fucked so i would forgive that in a second if u bothered apologizing
or maybe the picture, which like, whatever your intentions were clearly was pretty hurtful
or anything about low self esteem, treating me like a melodramatic idiot,
any of that rally
nickatnightwalkerim gonna address these in order
bythepowerof4unless ur adress contains a sorry i dont care
ive heard ur excuses and thats great but thats not how this works
nickatnightwalkerlike
nickatnightwalkerugh jesus cut me some slack im not exactly a social guru here either im sorry about the low self esteem comment that was genuinely not meant to be douchy and neither was the picture even though i sent it because i was pissed
that was more of a look youre wrong kinda thing but i get how with daisy saying you were jealous that looks way harsher than i thought it was so im sorry about that
bythepowerof4even in context of like, just our previous convos i think that seems pretty harsh but yeah
thanks
i appreciate it for real
nickatnightwalkerand like i cant in good faith apologize for the you should be flattered shit because regardless of the situation daisy is daisy and in the interest of transparency im never gonna think anyones good enough for her but like i said she was willing to make an effort for you and i knew you were ok so
bythepowerof4oh my god
nickatnightwalkerwhat i honestly dont get why youre so shocked i prioritize daisy
bythepowerof4im not but you dont,, need to, for one
u know you didnt eed to compare us at all
and no offence but if youre trying to convince me you like me as a person and not just bc im convenient
saying "youre ok" as often as possible is NOT reassuring
nickatnightwalkeroh what
well first obviously i had to since you were getting kinda messed up over me doing thing for her not you and second of all i dont mean Ah Yes, You'll Do..... i mean youre ok
like
bythepowerof4that hadnt happened yet u just brought it up out of nowhere
nickatnightwalkernot bad
bythepowerof4it was douchey
nickatnightwalkerno you
you said it
like
ill scroll back if i have to but you said me doing it all for her felt bad
bythepowerof4yeah and it does fyi but u pulled that "you dont deserve her" crap last fucking night
if youre gonna continue a fight u started high at least read the backlogs dude
its clearly on ur mind if u brought it ip for no reason
nickatnightwalkerit wasnt for no reason it was because she was upset you called her weird and crazy
i didnt pull this shit from the void
bythepowerof4" you were getting kinda messed up over me doing thing for her not you" this hadnt happened yet thats all im saying
u cant even keep your excuses straight
i didnt compare us and you decided to and that understandably made me feel like shit
nickatnightwalkerwell goddamn you pulled the receipts it's certainly not like i couldnt have misunderstood what particular thing you were referring to
bythepowerof4i only did that bc u tried to make it about something else!! i get why u were mad at me but youre trying to make me look dumb its not fair!!
nickatnightwalkerim not trying to make you look like anything believe it or not
sometimes i too am capable of misunderstandings
bythepowerof4then why dont you ever say sorry for them
ive messed up like a dozen times in this convo alone and i said "sorry i misunderstood" ur just
id unno its going in circles and its dumb bc i just want you to not be mad at me
nickatnightwalkerbecause im too busy trying to tell you im not framing you to look like a tool
bythepowerof4and i said i believed you
but youre acting like im an idiot for thinking it at all
nickatnightwalkerdude im not
like i dont know what im doing thats making you think that but im sorry?
bythepowerof4i told you!! over and over!! and you kept making it into something else!!
literally read what u just said and tell me it wouldnt make u feel like an idiot
nickatnightwalkerwhatever sorry i compared you and said you should be flattered
bythepowerof4whatever
sorry agan for being a dick to you last night, bc i admit i was, and to daisy but ill take that one to her bc its like, Our Business
whatevers dont count and im tired so, till next time i guess
nickatnightwalker i said it after you upset her but before you apologized and pretty much would feel that way if donald glover himself came to her door
3 notes · View notes
ylla · 7 years
Text
Friday Night Gurus - Chapter 3
Series: JJBA Ships: josuyasu, koichi/yukako (others will eventually happen too, but im tagging as i go) Tags: au where theyre famous, modern au, pining, recreational drug use (smoking that wacky tabaccy), some angst in this one lads Rating: M (eventually there will be sex, so that rating will keep climbing)
AO3 link
i have never not been ready to be murdered by my own two hands.
“Oh fuck,” Josuke moaned, white knuckling his kitchen counter as he was thrust into over and over again. Rough hands were gripping his hips hard enough to leave bruises, and by God, Josuke hoped they did. He had always been way too loud during anything remotely sexual, and right now was no exception. The right spot was hit, Josuke felt like electricity was passing through his body, “God, right there, I’m close—“
One of the hands on his hip reached up for his hair, pulling up him with a gentle, yet firm grip, causing him to arch his back against the person behind him.
A mouth pressed against his ear, breath hot and voice harsh, “Beg me.”
“Please, please, please let me cum, please—“
Josuke’s earlobe got caught between teeth, while the hand tugging on his hair moved to his dick, roughly jerking him off. He was seeing stars, his voice going up a few octaves as he neared the edge, “Fuckfuckfuckfuck.” Josuke’s eyes rolled into the back of his head, inhaling sharply as he started to orgasm, “Oh fuck, Oku—“
“PEOPLE’S ELBOOOOW.”
Josuke woke up to a sudden, crushing elbow to his gut, shrieking in a totally manly way. It was completely dark in his room, but he could make out the black outline of a hulking man rolling around on his bed, snorting like the piggy bitch he was. “Man, I wish I would have turned on the light so I could have seen your face,” the big asshole wheezed, his laugh almost coming out in a stereotypical French ‘honhonhon’.
“JEAN PIERRE POLNAREFF, I’M GONNA LITERALLY MURDER YOU,” Josuke roared, struggling to sit up to push Polnareff’s muscly ass off of him.
Polnareff cackled like a witch, jumping up before Josuke could start punching him, “Up and at them, Josuke. It’s time for our run. I’ll be waiting downstairs.”
After Polnareff retreated, Josuke flopped back down, heart still racing. Waiting for his heart rate to return to normal, he grabbed his phone to check the time. It was 6 o’clock in the godforsaken morning. He regretted many things. He regretted giving Polnareff a key to his house. He especially regretted the dream he woke up from and the puddle of cum that had pooled in his underwear.
He put his pillow over his face and screamed. What a fuckin’ mess.
Three hours later, at a much more acceptable time to be awake, Josuke found himself sleepily watching Pol sashay around his kitchen while making omelets. Polnareff was a nutritionist, gym owner, fitness model, and Josuke’s personal trainer. He’d met Polnareff when he was introduced to his father’s side of the family so many years ago; he had been Jotaro’s roommate in college, and Holly, Josuke’s sister, basically considered Pol to be a second son (much to Jotaro’s chagrin and Polnareff’s delight). So not only did Polnareff wake him up at an ungodly hour twice a week, he got to nag and annoy Josuke at all other times as well.
“I have to say, I’m surprised that I didn’t see your friend in there with you this morning. You two are together a lot.”
Polnareff was keeping his tone casual, but Josuke knew exactly where this was headed, “Me and Oku don’t hang out all the time—“
“Josuke, this is the first morning in almost three months that I have walked into your room to wake you up and didn’t see him,” Polnareff pointed a spatula at him, “Can’t argue with the facts.”
He couldn’t, and Josuke despised it.
Ever since the first night he came over, Okuyasu had kept his word about making sure Josuke wasn’t lonely. Between Arrowhead slowing down their activities between their last tour and recording their next album, and Josuke taking a yearlong vacation, they both found themselves with a lot of free time. So, Okuyasu was stayed the night at least three or four times a week. They got high, played videogames, watched stupid movies, took late night drives together, ate food that was terrible for them. Slept in the same bed, and basically cuddled every night they watched a movie together. You know, normal friend stuff.
People like Okuyasu were so rare in Josuke’s life. He never put him on a pedestal like Josuke was some untouchable god or free ticket to fame. He was so grateful to have a friend that saw past all of his fame and fortune, and saw him as he was: just Josuke. It was wonderful and so refreshing.
However, there was one caveat.
Josuke had found himself head over heels in love with Okuyasu, and had to physically restrain himself from making any moves onto his friend. The better he got to know him, the worse it became. He had a sharp ache in his chest whenever he thought about his feelings, and his brain shrieked KISS HIM KISS HIM KISS HIM anytime Oku’s face got remotely near his, or whenever Oku would look at him with a shy smile, or even when Okuyasu cried over something like shelter animals or sad movies. It was all so endearing and Josuke couldn’t get enough of him. For all his flirtations, and for all of the content in his songs that implied that Josuke was some kind of suave, smooth talker, he couldn’t bring himself to risk the first real friendship he’d had in years.
“So what? We hang out a lot, it’s not a big deal,” Josuke forced his voice to remain neutral, “Didn’t you use to bitch and moan at me about never hanging out with anyone besides you assholes, Jolyne, and Koichi?”
“Ignoring your hurtful words, yes I did complain,” Polnareff flipped both omelets onto separate plates; he placed on in front of Josuke and then sat across in the table from him, resting his chin on the top of his water bottle, “But that’s not my point.”
“Then what is?” Josuke arched an eyebrow at him, daring Polnareff to say what he was thinking.
Polnareff was quiet for a few moments before answering, “You should tell him that you’re in love with him.”
Of course Polnareff knew how Josuke felt. He had been the one who had barged in on Josuke lovingly pushing stray hairs out of Okuyasu’s face while he slept one morning. Josuke blurted out everything in a panic while they went for their run, begging him to not speak of it to anyone, especially Okuyasu.
“Absolutely not,” Josuke said flatly.
“You are fucking up, my friend, but it’s your decision,” Polnareff sat up straight and pointed at the omelet in front of him, “Eat that before it gets cold.”
The rest of the conversation was Polnareff talking about some kind of nonsense, Josuke was only paying half-attention because he was still really tired, hungry, and slightly irritated at the earlier conversation. Yeah, like it was so easy to tell your best friend that he was hot and you wanted to kiss him all over, and you were in love with him, haha, full homo bro—
Josuke was pulled out his thoughts to the sound of his text notification going off. His heart did some weird somersault when he saw that Okuyasu had texted him (Josuke finally got his number when Oku put it in his phone for him):
Oku: mornin dude :D
Oku: u doin anythin tonight?
Josuke: nah I aint got anything going on, why?
Oku: were playin a secret show at echoes bar tonight. u wanna come?
He wants me to come see him play, Josuke wheezed inwardly. He responded immediately:
Josuke: HELL YES I DO
Oku: :D hell yeah dude
Oku: i think yukako is gonna invite koichi too, so ill let hazamada kno that yall are gonna be there. he’ll have ur backstages passes ready.
Oku: also word to the wise, wear shorts and a tanktop. the bar gets super hot during shows. ull die in anything else
The rest of their texts were directions, Josuke saying he was excited, and an abundance of smiley face emotes from Okuyasu.
“Oi! Josuke! Stop ignoring me!”
“Oh shit, sorry dude,” Josuke had completely forgotten Polnareff was there, “Did you ask me something?”
Polnareff pouted, “You are so rude to me. I was asking you if you wanted to get dinner with me, Noriaki, and Jolyne tonight. Jotaro is still out in the field and Mo is doing some college thing, so it’ll just be the four of us.”
 Josuke couldn’t stop himself from breaking out into a huge grin, “Sorry, I got plans tonight.”
The upside to having a signature look was that if Josuke had his hair down or in a ponytail, no one recognized him. So when he stood in the very back of Echoes with Koichi, trying to not get trampled by the massive crowd, no one bothered him.
Not that they would’ve anyways. What was happening on stage was infinitely more interesting.
The music was so loud, Josuke could feel it vibrate into his chest. His ears were starting to ring a little, but he didn’t care. Oku’s voice was amazing when he recorded in a studio, but listening to him live was almost like an out of body experience. His voice just crashed over him like the tide, and Josuke wanted it to sweep him out to sea.
Oku hadn’t been lying when he said the club got too hot; all four members of Arrowhead were various states of undress. Josuke could only see half of Yuuya, but he looked like he was naked behind his drum kit. Yukako had her hair up in a high ponytail, wearing ass eating shorts and a cutoff tank top. Keicho was shirtless and in shorts, hair down out of his normal…whatever he had going on there. Oku was dressed more or less the same, but the difference was Okuyasu was infinitely more attractive. Josuke could see the band of his boxer briefs peak up over the waist of his shorts, and licked his lips unconsciously.
Okuyasu was sweaty, loose hairs from his ponytail were falling his face, and looked like he was having a blast, giving all he had and then some. Josuke didn’t think it could’ve been possible, but he fell more in love with him as he watched. All he wanted was to find out what skin that stretched over his hip bones tasted like.
“Koichi, I’m gay.” Josuke moaned.
“What did you say? I can’t hear you,” Koichi called back.
“I said I’m gay!”
Koichi just gave him a very confused look, clearly not understanding what he was saying.
“I’M GAY!” Josuke hollered, grabbing Koichi by the shoulders and shaking him for emphasis.
“Agh! I get it, I get it! Stop!!!”
Yukako noticed them first. After they finished a song, and was in the process of swapping guitars out, Yukako grabbed Okuyasu by the bicep and whispered in his ear. He looked over to the corner Josuke and Koichi were in, and his face lit like the sun. He waved excitedly, which Josuke couldn’t help but wave back, matching his enthusiasm and smile. Okuyasu walked over to a short, sallow looking dude and pointed over towards them. A few minutes later, the roadie appeared beside them, “Here’s your passes, follow me.”
The backstage was kind of cramped, filled with at least a dozen good looking women. Josuke tried to stand away from them, half afraid of being recognized and half wanting to avoid hearing about which band members they wanted to fuck.
When the show ended, the groupies rushed at the bandmembers as they filed off stage. Yukako lips curled into a snarl and elbowed her way over to Koichi; when in front of him, the ice melted and she gave him a sweet smile before planting a kiss on his lips. Koichi froze momentarily before returning the smooch. Josuke had asked Koichi a few weeks ago what was up with him and Yukako. All he got in response was a shrug and a “We’re dating??”
Keicho and Yuuya were wrapped up in all the attention from the groupies, who were fawning over all over them (Yuuya wasn’t naked, and Josuke thanked his lucky stars he didn’t have to see Yuuya’s penis). Girls were too busy playing with Keicho’s hair and rubbing on Yuuya to notice that Okuyasu had quietly slipped in behind them. Good, Josuke sighed with relief, He’ll keep it lowkey.
Which he immediately ruined by shouting, “JOSUKE!” and pounding over to him, nearly knocking Josuke off of his feet with a hug, “YOU CAME!”
Okuyasu was too warm and sweaty, and if there was a god, he would prevent Okuyasu from feeling how hard Josuke was getting from feeling his bare chest press against him. Josuke returned the hug with ferocity, “Of course I did, I said I would.” He pulled back to look Okuyasu in the face, and also prevent his errant boner from rubbing up against him. “It were fantastic, I’m so blown away! You’re amazing, Okuyasu.” Josuke beamed at him, and the tears that filled Okuyasu’s eyes made his stomach flutter.
“You mean that?” he croaked.
“Yeah!”
“Pinky promise?”
Josuke hooked his pinky with Okuyasu’s, “Pinky promise.”
Okuyasu gave him a watery smile before hugging him again, “Thanks. That means a lot, coming from you,” Oku whispered against his shoulder.
If there wasn’t a million pairs of eyes on him, Josuke would have said ‘fuck it’ and kissed Okuyasu right then and there, but he was too chicken. “You’re welcome, Oku,” Josuke pulled away again, “Go shower and then we’ll get out of here.”
“Oh shit,” Okuyasu rubbed the back his neck, looking sheepish, “Sorry, I got like super sweaty and gross.”
Josuke gave him a friendly punch in the arm, “S’fine dude, I don’t care. I’m gonna go smoke, so just come outside when you’re done.” Okuyasu made an assenting noise before jogging off to go shower. Pointedly ignoring Yuuya’s waggling eyebrows and some indecipherable look from Keicho, Josuke swiveled on his heels and left.
It was late summer, but the air felt a 1000x times cooler than it did inside. Josuke had been enjoying his few minutes of peace and quiet while he sat the backdoor’s staircase when he heard someone walk out behind him. He almost greeted Okuyasu, but an unfamiliar voice spoke.
“Why are you here?”
That was not Okuyasu.
Josuke turned to find a still shirtless Keicho peering down at him, hair hanging in his face, unlit cigarette in his hand. “Oku invited me,” Josuke replied, not liking the look on Keicho’s face.
“Why?”
What fuckin’ kind of question is that?? “Because we’re friends? And I told him I wanted to see you guys perform sometime?”
Keicho lit his cigarette and took a drag, his eyes never leaving Josuke’s, “Why?”
Josuke was about .3 seconds away from losing his temper, “Why what?? What the fuck are you asking me, dude??”
“Why are you friends with him?”
It was a huge effort to not start shrieking into the night, “Because he’s a cool guy? And funny? And I enjoy his company? What fucking kind of question is that?” Josuke snubbed out his cigarette, drawing himself up to full height, “What exactly are you trying to say here?”
“Okuyasu doesn’t have friends, and I don’t trust you,” Keicho responded coldly, “I wanna know what you’re after.”
“I’m just after his friendship, you clown!” Josuke exclaimed, rapidly losing his patience, “Is that so fuckin’ hard to believe??”
Before Keicho could retort, the door banged open. “Keicho, you got girls here who wanna inflict terrible things upon your penis, you better get in here and give ‘em what they want,” Yuuya grinned, leaning against the door frame. Purple bruises marred his neck and Josuke could hear whining from behind him.
Without another word to Josuke, Keicho dropped his cigarette, ground it out with his heel, and shouldered past Yuuya. The door swung closed, and Josuke exploded, “What the fuck is his deal??”
Yuuya shrugged, “That’s just Keicho.”
Josuke pointed at Yuuya, “No, that’s just being a cock goblin. I’ve never done anything to that guy, why’s he being such a dickhead??”
“I’ve known Keicho and Okuyasu since I was about 12,” Yuuya started, “There’s a lot of reasons why they’re both the way they are. Good or bad, right or wrong.” He kicked an empty cigarette pack off of the stairs, “Keicho’s got this thing about controlling things and people,” Yuuya took a seat on the top step, “Oku being with you all the time prevents Keicho from having his brother under his thumb.”
“With the way Oku talks about him, it sounds like Keicho fuckin’ hates him.”
Yuuya shrugged again, “Keicho makes it a point to be an absolute bastard to Oku most of the time. Though, he did take a knife to the gut when Akira tried to stab Okuyasu, so that’s something.”
Josuke was thoroughly confused, “Why?”
“Obligation to their mom, I imagine. Keicho got really drunk once and told me that before she died, she made him promise that he would always look out for Okuyasu. So he does, in some way or another.” Yuuya sprung up to his feet, “I will say this, Josuke…it’s nice that Okuyasu’s got a friend not linked to his brother in one way or another. Good for him, ya? But,” He stared Josuke down, all friendliness gone, “I’m pretty perceptive on how you feel, so no need to try and deny it to me. It’s obvious to everyone save for Okuyasu himself and probably Keicho. So, this is a warning: Don’t hurt Oku, or I will find you and whoop your ass. We clear?”
I rather die than hurt him. “Crystal.”
Before either of them could say anything else, Okuyasu walked out of the backdoor with a bruised right cheek, bloody knuckles, and a nose dripping red, “Ready to bounce?”
“Dude, super fuck your brother.”
Okuyasu sat in Josuke’s kitchen while Josuke did his best to doctor him up. He waved a hand, “S’fine, we do this sometimes. He gets too mouthy and I gotta stand my ground,” Okuyasu hissed when Josuke sprayed antiseptic on his oozing knuckles.
“You still haven’t told me what he said.”
As he rarely did, Okuyasu evaded the question, “S’not important. What matters is that I shut ‘em up and he won’t be running that big, stupid mouth of his for a while.”
According to Oku, Keicho walked away from that scuffle with a split lip, black eyes, and probably bruises all over his chest. Not that would’ve deterred the groupies from trying to touch his dick anyways, Okuyasu had theorized on the way to Josuke’s house (Josuke had insisted on driving and went extra slow in fear that he would fuck up Oku’s baby), so Keicho couldn’t be too sore at him for long.
Instead of pushing the matter any further, Josuke took to wrapping Oku’s knuckles, “Tell me if I’m not doing this right.”
“Wrap it a little tighter, and you’ll be aces.”
After he finished, Josuke got up and took an ice gel pack out of his fridge. Thank God Polnareff had insisted he buy one a few months ago, “I’ve been in a fair amount of fights, but that’s the first time I’ve ever had to bandage someone else’s hands.”
“Somehow that doesn’t surprise me,” Okuyasu flexed his fingers, pleased with how the bandages felt, “You did good kid, I used to wrap ‘em up like this when I did bare knuckle boxing matches.”
Josuke walked back over to him, cold compress wrapped in a dishtowel, “You used to box?”
Okuyasu winced as Josuke pressed it to his right cheek, “Yeah, I did underground fights for money. Helped rent out the studio when we recorded our first demo.”
“That’s unsurprising,” Josuke sat on the edge of his table so he could hold the pack to Oku’s face without getting too tired, “You still box?”
“Nah, not really. When I hit the gym, I just beat on the punching bag instead. Keicho’s good practice too,” he snorted. Josuke rolled his eyes; Okuyasu yawned and then gave him a lazy smile, “Josuke, why am I so sleepy right now?”
Josuke peered down at him, eyebrows raised, “Oh, I don’t know. Could it have been the fact that you just played a show in a cramped, hot bar, and then got into a fist fight with your older brother?”
“You may be onto something, boss.” Okuyasu exhaled, closing his eyes and pressing his face slightly into the cold pack. After a few minutes of quiet, he spoke softly, “I know I said this earlier, but m’really glad you came tonight…meant a lot to me…I ain’t never had a friend who actually cared enough to come to a show jus’ for me.” Okuyasu raised his bandaged right hand and placed it over the hand that held the compress to his face, rubbing circles into the skin, “Thanks.”
Josuke does the stupidest thing he has ever done in his entire 24 years of living: he leans over and kisses Okuyasu right on the mouth.
It feels like time stopped before Josuke pulls away. Okuyasu’s eyes are wide open, face glowing red like he has a sunburn. He stands up, startled, “I—I gotta go, I-“ he’s tripping over himself, the chair, and hightails it out of the front door.
Josuke’s brain takes a minute to grind back into motion, and he runs after Oku, “Wait! Dude I’m—“
By the time he gets outside, he can make out Oku’s taillights buzzing down the road.
He stands on his front porch for a long time, staring out into the street, hoping, begging to see Oku’s car return. For him to jump out of his car and holler, “IT’S JUST A PRANK, BRO” before bounding up the steps to return Josuke’s kiss with gusto.
Rain starts falling, and Josuke remains rooted the spot. Dimly, he registers that he is now soaked to the bone, and Okuyasu was not coming back. He did it. He ruined his friendship, because he couldn’t fucking help himself. He couldn’t just be satisfied with how things were.
In a numb haze, Josuke walks back inside, closing the door and locking it behind him with a soft click. He turns the shower on the hottest setting he could stand, sits in the floor as hot water pours all over him, and just trembles.
When the water runs cold, he finally steps out. Mechanically, Josuke pulled on some old sweats and his favorite t-shirt. He can’t bear to look at his bed, let alone sleep in it, knowing that it was bound to smell like Okuyasu, and that was something he couldn’t even begin to handle.
The couch it was. Josuke checked his phone, hoping to have missed a call or text from Oku, but nothing greeted him; he turned it off and threw it across the room. Curled up under a blanket, he listened to the rain pelt the windows, and finally allowed himself to cry.
Something was banging against the front door.
Josuke jerked awake, feeling awful. It took a few seconds for his brain to process where he was, and when he remembered, he had to quickly wipe his tears. He had to keep it together.
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Josuke mumbled to no one, cocooning himself in his blanket. The banging was incessant; Josuke figured it was a drunk Tamami who had forgotten his key to Josuke’s front door back at his apartment. It was something that occurred more regularly than it should. As he passed the entrance to the kitchen, the oven’s clock blared the time: 3:24 am. He was going to murder whoever it was.
He unlocked the front door and jerked it open, ready to snarl something at whomever made the mistake of waking him up, when he came face to face with Okuyasu.
Oku looked fucking awful. Soaked to the bone with chattering teeth, red-rimmed puffy eyes; it made Josuke die a little on the inside to see him in such a sorry state, “Jesus Christ Oku, how long have you been out here??” Josuke reached to pull him inside, but Okuyasu smacked his hand away. Tears threatened, and anger rose up inside him like bile, “Why did you come back?” he asked, placing his head into his hands so Okuyasu couldn’t see his face. After what feels like an eternity stretches on, Josuke half-contemplates just slamming the door closed, so Okuyasu would be spared the trouble of having to devastate Josuke anymore.
“Kiss me again.”
Slowly, Josuke lowered his hands to look Oku in the face. He could see that Okuyasu was crying, tears running hot down his scared face. “I’m sorry for leavin’, I’m sorry for runnin’. I’m a fuckin’ idiot fool,” the words burst out of Okuyasu like a dam had broken, “You’re the most perfect thing on this stupid planet, I’ve been crazy over you ever since we first met. I didn’t know if you were makin’ fun of me or somethin’ when you kissed me, so I got scared and ran, but I just ended up making you upset, which is—“ His breath started hitching and he was crying even harder, “The last thing— I ever w-wanna do is hurt y-y-you. Y-you m-mean everyth-thing to me.”
Josuke also had tears running down his face; he pulled Oku into a tight hug and ran his fingers through his hair, shushing him softly, “It’s okay, don’t cry.”
“I’m sorry,” he wailed, face buried into Josuke’s neck, “Please forgive me, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”
“I forgive you, it’s okay. You came back.”
“It’s not okay,” Okuyasu pulled himself away to look Josuke in the eyes, “I hurt you.” Hesitantly, he wiped the tears off of Josuke’s face. Josuke couldn’t stop himself anymore; he pressed his lips against Okuyasu’s. This time, his kiss was returned enthusiastically, and it made Josuke’s very soul sing. Taking great care to not trip over something, Josuke lead Okuyasu into the house without breaking their kiss, closing the door behind him. Josuke couldn’t get enough of how Okuyasu tasted; the kisses were sweet, chaste, and everything Josuke imagined it would be like.
“Do you wanna stay the night?” Josuke murmured against Oku’s lips.
“Yeah, if that’s okay with you.”
Josuke pulled away and kissed the tip of Okuyasu’s nose, took his hand, and led him upstairs.
After Okuyasu’s quick shower, they found themselves tangled up in each other’s limbs, kissing just as slow and gently as before. “Hey Josuke,” Okuyasu’s whispered, voice raspy.
“Yeah?”
“M’really tired and stuff,” Oku stifled a yawn, “so I dunno if we should talk about this now or—“
Josuke brushed a thumb across Oku’s cheek, “I think we should wait until tomorrow morning, after we get some sleep. Okay?” He pressed a kiss onto Okuyasu’s forehead, which turns warm underneath his lips.
“’Kay,” he mumbled, pressing his hot face into Josuke’s neck, “Uhm, I do got one question though, and I don’t wanna wait to ask.”
Josuke pulled back to look him in the face, “Yeah, what’s up?”
Okuyasu was blood red, looking rather meek. “Are we boyfriends now?” he asked softly, as if he scared to hear a rejection.
Butterflies had taken up permanent residence in Josuke’s stomach, and it was taking everything in him to not start wiggling around like an excited puppy, “Do you want us to be boyfriends?”
He got an enthusiastic nod in reply; Oku was too shy to say it out loud, but he did grab one of Josuke’s hands so he could kiss his knuckles.
A grin spread across Josuke’s face, “I guess that makes us boyfriends then.”
The smile that lit up Okuyasu’s face would be one that Josuke wanted tattooed to the inside of his mind, so he could remember it forever.
The slow, lazy kisses they traded relaxed him enough that sleep was moments away. Faintly, before succumbing, Josuke was certain he heard “I love you” whispered into his ear.
26 notes · View notes
adambstingus · 6 years
Text
Every Halloween, I Have A Story I Like To Tell
I liked Ben, I really did. I mean, he was a nice guy. We had some fun times together in college, messing around the dorm, going to parties, all the dumb shit that college guys do. He was cool and all, but he was a little pretentious. Well, I guess the word he used was artistic. He thought he was real smart, spent a lot of time trying to prove it to everyone. He had his own blog developed to film critiques not the big ones, though. Just little indie productions because nothing else was worth his time. When he got like that, he could be pretty insufferable.
Perhaps the most annoying thing that he did was performance art.
Now, I dont wanna be the guy who says that all performance art is dumb. But yeah, no, all performance art is dumb. Oh, look, youre on display painting a picture of Jesus from your own urine, how original and edgy! Maybe Im a little jaded, but it always seemed so contrived to me. Unfortunately, Ben really loved it. He thought there was something beautiful in art that was physically living and he devoted an embarrassing amount of time to it.
Anyway, I hung out with Ben a few times after college, but we mostly just met up to do some heavy drinking and maybe hit a strip club or two. He considered THAT performance art as well, which was just fine with me, it gave me an excuse to waste some ones. Since we didnt hang out very often, I had a bad feeling when he contacted me about a month before last Halloween.
He called me up at about seven in the morning on a Saturday, which is too early to even consider waking up, in my opinion. I answered in a daze and he started running his mouth like crazy, as though afraid that, if he didnt get it all out at once, he never would.
Mike, hey, Mikey, listen, buddy, I need your help, okay? Okay, okay, Ive got this idea for a performance and, well, its going to be , you know? So good! Its going down on Halloween. Can you come help? Look, Ill even pay you, man. Fifty dollars. So how bout it?
Now, Ive never cared much about Halloween one way or the other, and Im a pretty easy guy. Fifty dollars to probably just sit there and run a fog machine or some bullshit? For the right price, I could even pretend that I wanted to be there. Besides, what else are friends for?
A few days later, he gave me the details. To be honest, I was a little shocked when he sent the email. I know that performance art is intended to be edgy and can sometimes get a little dangerous, but this seemed downright negligent.
Mike:
Thanks for agreeing to do this for me! Ive talked to a few other people, but they werent really comfortable with it, for reasons youll probably be able to figure out. Of course, I understand if you want to back out, but I think you are probably the most reliable person I know. Its really not that big of a deal, Im sure youll agree.
As Im sure youve noticed, vampires have become very prominent in the media as of late. I say vampires because they are beginning to deviate so wildly from the traditional myths that they resemble forest fairies more than anything else. Altruistic? Sparkly? Whiny? Give me a break. We need more Dracula! We need more Carmilla! We need more death, destruction, and blood!
My performance will center on the theme of rebirthing the vampire. For the vampire to be reborn, he must first be buried. To turn peoples attentions back to the myths of old, I will be doing just that: I will be burying the vampire.
I have a group of viewers signed up already to participate in the performance, so you dont need to worry about that. Im going to plant a series of vampire-themed clues around town for them to follow. The clues should be pretty simple, and it will probably take no more than an hour to an hour-and-a-half for them to find me.
Here comes the somewhat controversial part. Essentially, for this performance to have any semblance of meaning, I need to be buried alive. Dont worry, its perfectly safe: I have a buddy from back home who is building me a coffin with a hole in the top. Ill be fixing it with a pipe that will stick an inch or two above the ground. That way, I wont run out of air. Ill also have a few necessities in the coffin in case something happens: food, water, and a flashlight.
Once they arrive at my grave which will be completely vampirized they will be provided with an array of shovels and will bring me back to life, a reincarnation of the true mythological history of vampires.
Here is where you come in. I need you to bury me. In addition, I need you to be my safety net: if they cant find me, if something goes wrong, if I become sick, I need you to be the one to get me out or call the police, if necessary. Ill also need you to decorate my grave, make it really creepy dont worry, Ill send you some blueprints.
I know this is a little stressful and it may take some time for you to decide, but, rest assured, this is a completely safe project. Theres no danger of suffocation and the coffin is sturdy, so its very unlikely that it will collapse. I really just need you there for support and the actual hard work of burying me.
What do you say? Id even be willing to up your pay to a hundred dollars, if thats what you need.
Let me know!
RIP,
Ben
I stared at my screen for a few minutes, completely dumbfounded.
Once I cut through all the bullshit about art and vampires and rebirth, what it came down to was death.
This guy actually wanted me to almost kill him.
I mean, sure, it probably WAS safe. But my mind went over the plan slowly. What if I couldnt get him out in time? One shovel and a pit of dirt wouldnt be a fast job. Furthermore, what if something happened to me?
Before making a decision, I sent him another email asking if he was really sure he was up for this. Of course he knew, he said. And then he said something that would always stick with me.
Art must be a little dangerous, my friend, for it to be real.
A month later, I found myself standing at the foot of a grave. It was six feet deep and perfectly rectangular. Sitting at the bottom was a tapered coffin covered with black lacquer, a white skull painted on the top. In the eye of the skull was a hole just big enough for the PVC pipe. Stenciled underneath was a line from Dracula: Denn die Todten reiten schnell.
I stood there like an idiot, waiting for Ben to show up.
In the end, Id decided to go along with his stupid gig. Ben was a stubborn bastard, and if I didnt help him, someone else would. At least, thats the justification I gave myself. But the real reason was that, deep inside my heart, his words were still echoing.
Id ended up doing a little more work than I had intended. For one, I had to place his stupid clues around the city. It wasnt hard work, but it took some time to get them all in the proper places. Luckily for Ben, they were pretty obvious clues. There was no need to worry that his participants would be unable to find him.
Ben had set up the grave and the coffin a few days prior to Halloween. It was out in the woods just on the outskirts of town, no chance of it being disturbed. Id tried to talk him out of burying it the whole six feet down.
If something happens and I need to get you out fast, what will I do? Cant you put it closer to the surface?
Ben had just shaken his head in exasperation. You just dont get it, do you? It has to be done right. Remember what I told you.
So I shrugged and let him mess around with whatever dumbassery would get him off.
I was just beginning to wonder if I should have brought more beer this promised to be a long night when Ben showed up.
I had to restrain my laughter when I saw his getup. A cheap Dracula costume from Wal-mart had never looked so pathetic, especially when topped off with those cheap plastic fangs. Hed greased his hair back and painted on a widows peak.
I couldnt resist. Wow, seriously, dude?
He gave me a stern look. Its a comment on the commercialization of vampires and horror as we know it today. He fished around in his pocket and pulled out a walkie talkie. Here, take one. The range isnt very far, but my cell phone wont work that far underground. Youll have to stay nearby. Let me know if youre going out of range.
I shrugged and took it. Okay, but you brought your cell just in case, right?
Nah, what good will it do if it doesnt work?
This guys batshit insane, I thought. But he handed me the hundred dollars and, suddenly, it didnt seem to matter anymore.
I helped him into the coffin and shut the lid. He seemed pretty calm if it were me, I knew Id be having a panic attack. I fit the PVC pipe into the hole. It slid in perfectly snug. I climbed out of the coffin and grabbed my shovel, taking one last look at the shiny black peeking out from the dirt.
With a resigned shrug, I started to shovel in the dirt. Okay, well, he asked for this, I thought.
It took almost a full hour to get all the dirt piled in. The PVC pipe was just barely visible over the grave. I piled the earth around it to hide it as well as I could. Then, I set up the rest of the grave: a hideously gothic headstone made of Styrofoam, and cheap Wal-mart flowers. Once it was finally finished, I sat back against a tree and waited.
There was an awful lot of waiting to be done.
Three hours later, his participants still hadnt come.
Hed buzzed in on the walkie talkie a few times, asking if theyd shown up. I continually answered in the negative, wondering how long hed be willing to keep up this charade. He must be getting worried, I thought, staring at my watch. It was already 10 pm and not a soul to be seen.
Hey, Mike? Something must have happened, I dont think theyre coming. Can you get me out of here? Bens voice crackled and faded in and out of the static fuzz. I took another swig of my beer and heaved a sigh.
Of course they werent coming. They were frantically searching for the last clue. My hand crept into my pocket as I felt it folded there, the creases poking at the soft flesh of my palm.
Mike? Are you there? Did you go out of range?
I turned the walkie talkie off. I didnt need it anymore, anyway. Carefully, I picked up a handful of disturbed earth from the top of the makeshift grave. I poured it down the pipe and listened.
I heard the muffled exclamation, the series of expletives. I thought I could hear a thumping sound he must be hitting the top of the coffin. I smiled a little to myself as I poured some more dirt in through the pipe.
Bens struggles got louder and I felt a certain heat rising up in me. Oh, I knew it could be good, but I didnt know it could be good. This was incredible. This was perfect. This was .
Eventually, I grew bored of shoving the earth down into the coffin. I could hear Bens screaming and sobbing reverberating up the pipe. I yanked a handkerchief out of my back pocket and stuffed it inside. I made sure to plug it up good and tight.
It would only be a matter of time, now. Assuming he could regulate his breathing, he could possibly have a few hours. But I knew he was panicking. And that would simply serve to shorten his time.
The pounding grew weaker as I finished my beer. Once I was certain there was no saving him, I went to finish my work.
Ben was right everything really did go off without a hitch. I dont know what I was so worried about.
Id gone to find his lost sheep, the wayward participants who were scrambling in frustration for the last clue. I scolded them for making us wait so long, acted the part of the reluctant friend indulging his lunatic companion. I took them out to the grave. It was now past midnight.
They sat hushed as I gave the stupid speech that Ben had prepared for me. Everything seemed normal Id made sure to stow the rag before anyone could see it.
Friends, foes, and everyone in between. Tonight we gather to resurrect the ancient horror that has plagued mankind for centuries. Its tale, once a gruesome epic of blood and seduction, has become nothing more than commercialized fodder as society has aged. Now, the time has come for the phoenix to burn and rise again. So, too, shall the blood-soaked visage of the vampire! My voice resonated throughout the woods, and the morons in attendance clapped as they all reached for their shovels.
We dug him up in about half an hour. It was much faster work with his host of suckers. It was good that we reached the coffin quickly, because I could barely contain my excitement.
Two of the men opened the coffin and screamed. The women leaned in over the grave to peek as well, full of expectancy. There was something dreadful about the scene, to be sure.
Bens face had gone gray, sprayed over with a few specs of dirt. His hands were bloody, his fingernails pried off. Deep scratches decorated the top of the lid. The men who had opened his tomb dragged him out in a panic, unsure if this was part of the performance or not. A few moments of silent listening at his chest produced no heartbeat. The proclamation was definitive: he was dead.
They screamed. They called the police. They alternatively looked at his body and shielded themselves from its horror, enraptured yet struggling.
They ignored me.
But that was fine. It was fine because they were admiring my work, the work of the artist. Finally, I had been given this opportunity to prove my worth. Finally, I had found my sacrificial lamb. And it had been a rousing success. The heat raging in my body affirmed that much. I didnt even care if I was caught, so long as I could have this moment to hold for the rest of my life.
Ben was right. I should have known a man of principle never lies. And I owe him a debt of gratitude, for realizing the artist within me.
Art must be a little dangerous for it to be real.
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/every-halloween-i-have-a-story-i-like-to-tell/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/172357360662
0 notes
samanthasroberts · 6 years
Text
Every Halloween, I Have A Story I Like To Tell
I liked Ben, I really did. I mean, he was a nice guy. We had some fun times together in college, messing around the dorm, going to parties, all the dumb shit that college guys do. He was cool and all, but he was a little pretentious. Well, I guess the word he used was artistic. He thought he was real smart, spent a lot of time trying to prove it to everyone. He had his own blog developed to film critiques not the big ones, though. Just little indie productions because nothing else was worth his time. When he got like that, he could be pretty insufferable.
Perhaps the most annoying thing that he did was performance art.
Now, I dont wanna be the guy who says that all performance art is dumb. But yeah, no, all performance art is dumb. Oh, look, youre on display painting a picture of Jesus from your own urine, how original and edgy! Maybe Im a little jaded, but it always seemed so contrived to me. Unfortunately, Ben really loved it. He thought there was something beautiful in art that was physically living and he devoted an embarrassing amount of time to it.
Anyway, I hung out with Ben a few times after college, but we mostly just met up to do some heavy drinking and maybe hit a strip club or two. He considered THAT performance art as well, which was just fine with me, it gave me an excuse to waste some ones. Since we didnt hang out very often, I had a bad feeling when he contacted me about a month before last Halloween.
He called me up at about seven in the morning on a Saturday, which is too early to even consider waking up, in my opinion. I answered in a daze and he started running his mouth like crazy, as though afraid that, if he didnt get it all out at once, he never would.
Mike, hey, Mikey, listen, buddy, I need your help, okay? Okay, okay, Ive got this idea for a performance and, well, its going to be , you know? So good! Its going down on Halloween. Can you come help? Look, Ill even pay you, man. Fifty dollars. So how bout it?
Now, Ive never cared much about Halloween one way or the other, and Im a pretty easy guy. Fifty dollars to probably just sit there and run a fog machine or some bullshit? For the right price, I could even pretend that I wanted to be there. Besides, what else are friends for?
A few days later, he gave me the details. To be honest, I was a little shocked when he sent the email. I know that performance art is intended to be edgy and can sometimes get a little dangerous, but this seemed downright negligent.
Mike:
Thanks for agreeing to do this for me! Ive talked to a few other people, but they werent really comfortable with it, for reasons youll probably be able to figure out. Of course, I understand if you want to back out, but I think you are probably the most reliable person I know. Its really not that big of a deal, Im sure youll agree.
As Im sure youve noticed, vampires have become very prominent in the media as of late. I say vampires because they are beginning to deviate so wildly from the traditional myths that they resemble forest fairies more than anything else. Altruistic? Sparkly? Whiny? Give me a break. We need more Dracula! We need more Carmilla! We need more death, destruction, and blood!
My performance will center on the theme of rebirthing the vampire. For the vampire to be reborn, he must first be buried. To turn peoples attentions back to the myths of old, I will be doing just that: I will be burying the vampire.
I have a group of viewers signed up already to participate in the performance, so you dont need to worry about that. Im going to plant a series of vampire-themed clues around town for them to follow. The clues should be pretty simple, and it will probably take no more than an hour to an hour-and-a-half for them to find me.
Here comes the somewhat controversial part. Essentially, for this performance to have any semblance of meaning, I need to be buried alive. Dont worry, its perfectly safe: I have a buddy from back home who is building me a coffin with a hole in the top. Ill be fixing it with a pipe that will stick an inch or two above the ground. That way, I wont run out of air. Ill also have a few necessities in the coffin in case something happens: food, water, and a flashlight.
Once they arrive at my grave which will be completely vampirized they will be provided with an array of shovels and will bring me back to life, a reincarnation of the true mythological history of vampires.
Here is where you come in. I need you to bury me. In addition, I need you to be my safety net: if they cant find me, if something goes wrong, if I become sick, I need you to be the one to get me out or call the police, if necessary. Ill also need you to decorate my grave, make it really creepy dont worry, Ill send you some blueprints.
I know this is a little stressful and it may take some time for you to decide, but, rest assured, this is a completely safe project. Theres no danger of suffocation and the coffin is sturdy, so its very unlikely that it will collapse. I really just need you there for support and the actual hard work of burying me.
What do you say? Id even be willing to up your pay to a hundred dollars, if thats what you need.
Let me know!
RIP,
Ben
I stared at my screen for a few minutes, completely dumbfounded.
Once I cut through all the bullshit about art and vampires and rebirth, what it came down to was death.
This guy actually wanted me to almost kill him.
I mean, sure, it probably WAS safe. But my mind went over the plan slowly. What if I couldnt get him out in time? One shovel and a pit of dirt wouldnt be a fast job. Furthermore, what if something happened to me?
Before making a decision, I sent him another email asking if he was really sure he was up for this. Of course he knew, he said. And then he said something that would always stick with me.
Art must be a little dangerous, my friend, for it to be real.
A month later, I found myself standing at the foot of a grave. It was six feet deep and perfectly rectangular. Sitting at the bottom was a tapered coffin covered with black lacquer, a white skull painted on the top. In the eye of the skull was a hole just big enough for the PVC pipe. Stenciled underneath was a line from Dracula: Denn die Todten reiten schnell.
I stood there like an idiot, waiting for Ben to show up.
In the end, Id decided to go along with his stupid gig. Ben was a stubborn bastard, and if I didnt help him, someone else would. At least, thats the justification I gave myself. But the real reason was that, deep inside my heart, his words were still echoing.
Id ended up doing a little more work than I had intended. For one, I had to place his stupid clues around the city. It wasnt hard work, but it took some time to get them all in the proper places. Luckily for Ben, they were pretty obvious clues. There was no need to worry that his participants would be unable to find him.
Ben had set up the grave and the coffin a few days prior to Halloween. It was out in the woods just on the outskirts of town, no chance of it being disturbed. Id tried to talk him out of burying it the whole six feet down.
If something happens and I need to get you out fast, what will I do? Cant you put it closer to the surface?
Ben had just shaken his head in exasperation. You just dont get it, do you? It has to be done right. Remember what I told you.
So I shrugged and let him mess around with whatever dumbassery would get him off.
I was just beginning to wonder if I should have brought more beer this promised to be a long night when Ben showed up.
I had to restrain my laughter when I saw his getup. A cheap Dracula costume from Wal-mart had never looked so pathetic, especially when topped off with those cheap plastic fangs. Hed greased his hair back and painted on a widows peak.
I couldnt resist. Wow, seriously, dude?
He gave me a stern look. Its a comment on the commercialization of vampires and horror as we know it today. He fished around in his pocket and pulled out a walkie talkie. Here, take one. The range isnt very far, but my cell phone wont work that far underground. Youll have to stay nearby. Let me know if youre going out of range.
I shrugged and took it. Okay, but you brought your cell just in case, right?
Nah, what good will it do if it doesnt work?
This guys batshit insane, I thought. But he handed me the hundred dollars and, suddenly, it didnt seem to matter anymore.
I helped him into the coffin and shut the lid. He seemed pretty calm if it were me, I knew Id be having a panic attack. I fit the PVC pipe into the hole. It slid in perfectly snug. I climbed out of the coffin and grabbed my shovel, taking one last look at the shiny black peeking out from the dirt.
With a resigned shrug, I started to shovel in the dirt. Okay, well, he asked for this, I thought.
It took almost a full hour to get all the dirt piled in. The PVC pipe was just barely visible over the grave. I piled the earth around it to hide it as well as I could. Then, I set up the rest of the grave: a hideously gothic headstone made of Styrofoam, and cheap Wal-mart flowers. Once it was finally finished, I sat back against a tree and waited.
There was an awful lot of waiting to be done.
Three hours later, his participants still hadnt come.
Hed buzzed in on the walkie talkie a few times, asking if theyd shown up. I continually answered in the negative, wondering how long hed be willing to keep up this charade. He must be getting worried, I thought, staring at my watch. It was already 10 pm and not a soul to be seen.
Hey, Mike? Something must have happened, I dont think theyre coming. Can you get me out of here? Bens voice crackled and faded in and out of the static fuzz. I took another swig of my beer and heaved a sigh.
Of course they werent coming. They were frantically searching for the last clue. My hand crept into my pocket as I felt it folded there, the creases poking at the soft flesh of my palm.
Mike? Are you there? Did you go out of range?
I turned the walkie talkie off. I didnt need it anymore, anyway. Carefully, I picked up a handful of disturbed earth from the top of the makeshift grave. I poured it down the pipe and listened.
I heard the muffled exclamation, the series of expletives. I thought I could hear a thumping sound he must be hitting the top of the coffin. I smiled a little to myself as I poured some more dirt in through the pipe.
Bens struggles got louder and I felt a certain heat rising up in me. Oh, I knew it could be good, but I didnt know it could be good. This was incredible. This was perfect. This was .
Eventually, I grew bored of shoving the earth down into the coffin. I could hear Bens screaming and sobbing reverberating up the pipe. I yanked a handkerchief out of my back pocket and stuffed it inside. I made sure to plug it up good and tight.
It would only be a matter of time, now. Assuming he could regulate his breathing, he could possibly have a few hours. But I knew he was panicking. And that would simply serve to shorten his time.
The pounding grew weaker as I finished my beer. Once I was certain there was no saving him, I went to finish my work.
Ben was right everything really did go off without a hitch. I dont know what I was so worried about.
Id gone to find his lost sheep, the wayward participants who were scrambling in frustration for the last clue. I scolded them for making us wait so long, acted the part of the reluctant friend indulging his lunatic companion. I took them out to the grave. It was now past midnight.
They sat hushed as I gave the stupid speech that Ben had prepared for me. Everything seemed normal Id made sure to stow the rag before anyone could see it.
Friends, foes, and everyone in between. Tonight we gather to resurrect the ancient horror that has plagued mankind for centuries. Its tale, once a gruesome epic of blood and seduction, has become nothing more than commercialized fodder as society has aged. Now, the time has come for the phoenix to burn and rise again. So, too, shall the blood-soaked visage of the vampire! My voice resonated throughout the woods, and the morons in attendance clapped as they all reached for their shovels.
We dug him up in about half an hour. It was much faster work with his host of suckers. It was good that we reached the coffin quickly, because I could barely contain my excitement.
Two of the men opened the coffin and screamed. The women leaned in over the grave to peek as well, full of expectancy. There was something dreadful about the scene, to be sure.
Bens face had gone gray, sprayed over with a few specs of dirt. His hands were bloody, his fingernails pried off. Deep scratches decorated the top of the lid. The men who had opened his tomb dragged him out in a panic, unsure if this was part of the performance or not. A few moments of silent listening at his chest produced no heartbeat. The proclamation was definitive: he was dead.
They screamed. They called the police. They alternatively looked at his body and shielded themselves from its horror, enraptured yet struggling.
They ignored me.
But that was fine. It was fine because they were admiring my work, the work of the artist. Finally, I had been given this opportunity to prove my worth. Finally, I had found my sacrificial lamb. And it had been a rousing success. The heat raging in my body affirmed that much. I didnt even care if I was caught, so long as I could have this moment to hold for the rest of my life.
Ben was right. I should have known a man of principle never lies. And I owe him a debt of gratitude, for realizing the artist within me.
Art must be a little dangerous for it to be real.
Source: http://allofbeer.com/every-halloween-i-have-a-story-i-like-to-tell/
from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2018/03/28/every-halloween-i-have-a-story-i-like-to-tell/
0 notes
novapopstar · 7 years
Text
Let me tell a story about true love and loss.
This is one of my favorite stories to tell. And at the same time, its one of the hardest. You don't really get second chances. But if you were able to take that second chance in something you horribly screwed up on, you would take it, wouldn't you? This is gonna sound exactly like those very cliche white boy romance movies that try to be kinda edgy, i know it does in the beginning. Ive lived long enough to know that. But she... She was everything to me. Ive lived so long feeling nothing. She brought a spark to my dead soulless empty life. She was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. Its the reason i took that second chance. She can never know i exist. It was the beginning of summer of 2015. The final day of high school. I finished the exam at least an hour and a half early. And as most 18 year olds do, i put my earbuds in at full blast and passed out at my desk without a care in the world. Im awoken by an earthquake. The worst earthquake imaginable. My name is being screeched by what i can only describe is a Pterodactyl. I pull my headphones out of my ears. "What, Kamyrn?" I am not a happy boy. "The bell rang like 15 minutes ago." Are you serious? "You...didnt wake me up sooner?" The pterodactyl shrugs. "Didnt seem like i needed to just yet." I shouldve punched him right through his ginger face. He had a pale complexion, although more color than mine, freckles on his nose and cheeks, bright green eyes and the most irish looking red hair youve ever seen. Hes actually Italian. Hes basically what you call a cinnamon roll in meme terms. "So theres a music venue happening tonig-" "Nope." I stand up quickly, fix my bangs, and throw my hood up. I tried to bee line for the door but the fucker is always faster. I do NOT do social gatherings. Hes lucky i even talked to him. "Cmon, Tyyyyy! I want you to meet my friends. Theyre playing tonight!" "You know i dont like social events. I cant handle them. Besides i have to get home an-" He grabs my arms and pleads with his eyes. "Just this once? Pleaaaase?" I sigh. I hated it when he did that. I loved him so much i could hardly say no to him most of the time. "Fine. When do we go?" "We can start heading over right now. Theyre setting up and we can watch them warm up!" "You actually seem more cheery than normal. Anything special happening tonight?" "The Goddess, Tyler!!" Of course. "The Goddess" was a girl named Diana. The love of his life. She was literally too perfect. Beautiful black flowing hair, the deepest of blue eyes, beautifully pale skin, the most perfect smile. The sight caused Kamryn to become speechless. Especially since her father was there at the venue. The venue was basically as normal as you can get i guess. Smelled of sweat and heartbreak. The colors were a mix of greys and more greys. It was a really spacious area with some dining tables and chairs. I believe there was a bar at one end of the room. And right in the back was a big stage where they kept all the equipment for the bands. Big speakers lined the sides of the stage including the top of walls for surround sound in the building. This....this was the place i met her. Kamyrn was being interrogated by Dianas father, Marcus. Kamyrn sweating profusely. I mean, i dont blame him. Marcus was ripped and that rugged look and deep voice of his was something to feel threatened about. If you can picture what a roman soldier looked like, ya got Marcus. Diana was giggling and watching Kamyrn squirm the whole time. My senses were broken when the lights dimmed down and the first show was about to start. And as if an Angel has glided across the stage, she appeared. She was the most stunning thing i had ever laid eyes one. Shoulder length chestnut hair, from afar youd think they were green but she actually had hazel eyes, she had the sweetest smile, and i cant forget the red streaks in her hair. Her voice was something of an angel. And i caught myself staring. Ive never been a believer in love at first sight, but, damn... There was no mistaking it. I had slowly began to fall for her that night. But of course, i always have something come up to ruin my moments of bliss. Heres the part where things get complicated as all hell. I finished that graduation exam an hour and a half early because, ive taken it at least 25 times by now. At least at that school. I passed with flying colors because i know all the answers a little too well. The reason is the dumbest reason you have ever heard of. Im an 182 year old, as of 2015, vampire with the body of an 18 year old. All my features resemble a scrawny emo kid. Right down to the black nails, the black eyeliner, and the black emo hair. My purple eyes are natural however. Right now im having what is called Cravings. Now listen, i do not love being a vampire. Ive been running from that life for years. So i cringe at the thought of feeding off a humans. But at this moment in time, i am in need NOW. Therefore i cannot just waltz over to the nearest bloodbank and "charm speak" my way into dinner. I had to do my best to leave the venue without causing suspicion. I keep my eyes closed as i turn to Kam, holding a hand to my head. "Kam, dude im really sorry. The whole social thing is really getting to me. I really have to head out. I do not feel well." "Im really glad you tried to make it though, Ty. Ill check in on you later okay?" I nod and make the horrible mistake of opening my eyes. Kamryn wasnt looking however. But someone else did. My eyes tend to change color depending on the need. Right now theyre clearly gold. Gold for hunger. I quickly make my way out into the alley way. I hate every second of this. The alley smells like rotting shit and cat piss. Its the least of my worries. But its all i can smell. I need that trace of blood. Now. This isnt fun for me. I hate having to walk up to an unsuspecting human and trick them into letting me feed. This woman didnt deserve it. But they dont know what theyre doing when the "charm speak" is involved. Im able to pin her to the wall at this point, shes moaning in pleasure very loudy as i sink my teeth into her neck. I want to vomit. But i swallow and keep it down. She slumps down the wall unconscious. I didnt bleed her out, i never drink enough for that to happen. I fix her body in a way that when she wakes up, she'll think she just passed out from intoxication. Poor girl.. "A vampire? Never wouldve thought." I spin around, blood sorta dripping from my chin. I had made sure i was alone. It was just Marcus. But i didnt know why Marcus would have known. "Clean yourself, boy." I dont even blink as i wipe my chin furiously. "W-why did you follow me?" "I know the actions of a vampire when they need to feed. You showed clear signs back at the venue. I also saw those eyes of yours." "Well, what do you want from me?" He smiled wide. "Youre obviously no threat if youve been living the human world for so long. You nearly looked like death feeding off that woman." I looked defeated. "I didnt have the time to make it to a bloodbank, sir." Needless to say, i was taken back to venue after it was all cleared out. Kamryn looked worried as hell when i got back. "Dude, are you okay? I thought you were going home?" I smiled weakly. "I just needed to take a walk. Marcus found me to tell me to come back so i could meet your friends." Kam flashed a big smile. "Well the only one thats still here is-" "Emma." The Angel had spoken. Kam decided that was good enough and had walked over to flirt with his goddess. "So, a vampire huh?" I blinked. "Im sorry..?" She pointed to the shoulder area of my jacket. The fact Kam never noticed still annoys me. She laughs. "Thats not really the reason. I just know." She smirked. "Ive seen a few in my day. None looked like you though. Why are you trying so hard to seem human?" I felt it was pointless at this point. "I despise vampires." "So you despise yourself?" "Precisely." "Does Kamryn know?" "He can never know." She nods in understanding. "So yeah, im Emma Grayson." She extends her arm and i shake it nervously. Her hands were always so soft. Not to mention calloused. But the best hands ive ever held. "Tyler Deravious." This Tyler didnt realize what he was getting himself into. How this meeting would change his life for the worst. You dont get a third chance. If i could turn back, i would. I cannot begin to tell you the regret i feel writing this all down. I ended up leaving my apartment that i had been illegally living in for years now and i moved into the mansion that i never knew existed in chicago. This mansion housed demon slayers. An immortal roman soldier demon slayer and his adopted daughter. I had chosen to slay demons as well. Including my kind. Things only get more complicated from here. ------------- So im thinking about writing a story out that ive had in my mind since 2015. Im not the best at writing but maybe i can get better along the way if i stick with it. I dont have a name for it yet, but heres the prototype Prologue for my most favorite story ive thought of. This story is an emotional rollercoaster. But it follows the life of Tyler Deravious, a Rogue Vampire who hates the thought of being a vampire. He becomes a demon slayer and learns what its like to have a family after so many years. Falls in love. Learns to be less awkward and more brave. He has to help defeat a great evil that threatens to destroy Chicago, and maybe the world if hes not careful. It might just turn out too much for him. Im really hoping i can do something with this. Its all original! So take my shitty prologue and give me some critiques.
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Answer all 200 questions (if you don't have time, answer as many as you can get to!!)
Fuck okay lmao
200: My crush’s name is: I don’t really have a crush right now? But my fp’s name is Sebastian! 199: I was born in: Cape May Court House, New Jersey.198: I am really: tired of being alive lmao197: My cellphone company is: Verizon196: My eye color is: Hazel195: My shoe size is: 12.5194: My ring size is: idk man193: My height is: 5′11.5″192: I am allergic to: nothing191: My 1st car was: n/a190: My 1st job was: n/a189: Last book you read: For school, Fences. For pleasure, Nimona.188: My bed is: soft and squishy.187: My pet: is an adorable Italian Greagle named Bonnie.186: My best friend: Elizabeth, who barely goes on here anymore lol185: My favorite shampoo is: idk??184: Xbox or ps3: ps3183: Piggy banks are: annoying to use182: In my pockets: my wallet181: On my calendar: n/a180: Marriage is: nonexistent179: Spongebob can: finally die pls178: My mom: is amazing177: The last three songs I bought were? ive never bought music in my life lmao176: Last YouTube video watched: the most recent wtsf by meghan tonjes175: How many cousins do you have? 2174: Do you have any siblings? I have a brother and a half sister173: Are your parents divorced? No172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes171: Do you play an instrument? I used to play the trumpet but I sing.170: What did you do yesterday? Slept most of the day, saw Passengers with some friends, then went to a small New Year’s party[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: Sometimes.168: Luck: No.167: Fate: No.166: Yourself: No.165: Aliens: Yes.164: Heaven: No.163: Hell: No.162: God: No.161: Horoscopes: No.160: Soul mates: No.159: Ghosts: No.158: Gay Marriage: Yes??? wtf157: War: god no156: Orbs: idk what this is155: Magic: no[ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: Kisses153: Drunk or High: never been either so152: Phone or Online: online151: Red heads or Black haired: black haired150: Blondes or Brunettes: blondes149: Hot or cold: cold148: Summer or winter: winter147: Autumn or Spring: autumn146: Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate145: Night or Day: night144: Oranges or Apples: apples143: Curly or Straight hair: straight142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: milk chocolate140: Mac or PC: pc139: Flip flops or high heals: flip flops138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: sweet and poor137: Coke or Pepsi: coke136: Hillary or Obama: hillary135: Burried or cremated: cremated134: Singing or Dancing: singing133: Coach or Chanel: idk??132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: idk either of these people131: Small town or Big city: big city130: Wal-Mart or Target: target129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: ben stiller128: Manicure or Pedicure: idk manicure i guess127: East Coast or West Coast: east126: Your Birthday or Christmas: christmas125: Chocolate or Flowers: flowers124: Disney or Six Flags: disney123: Yankees or Red Sox: neither fuck sports lmao[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: Fuck it and anyone that supports it121: George Bush: Fuck him and anyone who supports him120: Gay Marriage: its just marriage lol119: The presidential election: fuck off118: Abortion: its the person own decision whether or not they should get one117: MySpace: never used it but it looks horrible lmao116: Reality TV: dramatic115: Parents: love my mom my dad can die in a fire114: Back stabbers: if you betray someone you can die113: Ebay: alright i guess?112: Facebook: too many conservatives111: Work: n/a110: My Neighbors: elderly but seemingly nice109: Gas Prices: i dont buy gas108: Designer Clothes: too expensive for me but i dont judge that107: College: needed but it shouldnt be106: Sports: pros get paid too fucking much 105: My family: mostly annoying and too conservative104: The future: bud i can barely plan ahead five minutes[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: last night102: Last time you ate: right now101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: last night100: Cried in front of someone: last wednesday at school lmao99: Went to a movie theater: last night98: Took a vacation: last summer i guess97: Swam in a pool: last summer96: Changed a diaper: n/a95: Got my nails done: n/a94: Went to a wedding: 2008 i think??93: Broke a bone: i havent92: Got a peircing: i havent91: Broke the law: last night90: Texted: like ten minutes ago[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: Sebastian88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dog87: The last movie I saw: Passengers86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: death and kissing cute boys85: The thing im not looking forward to: death84: People call me: a piece of shit83: The most difficult thing to do is: ask people for something that might inconvenience them82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: no81: My zodiac sign is: Cancer/Leo cusp80: The first person i talked to today was: Sebastian79: First time you had a crush: It was on Peter from The Chronicles of Narnia78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: i can hide things from everyone bud77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: idk76: Right now I am talking to: no one75: What are you going to do when you grow up: i want to be a veterinarian74: I have/will get a job: eventually73: Tomorrow: hopefully i wont kill myself also i want to play the walking dead a new frontier72: Today: i didnt kill myself and finished the walking dead season 271: Next Summer: maybe ill be getting ready for college maybe ill  be dead who knows70: Next Weekend: maybe get to hang out with Sebastian maybe die 69: I have these pets: a dog68: The worst sound in the world: metal scraping on metal67: The person that makes me cry the most is: i cant just pick one66: People that make you happy: Katie, Lizzie, Sebastian, Andrea, Kalina, Tabby65: Last time I cried: like an hour ago lmao64: My friends are: somehow real63: My computer is: tiny and slow62: My School: a piece of shit but im used to it61: My Car: n/a60: I lose all respect for people who: purposefully hurt another person59: The movie I cried at was: Marley and Me58: Your hair color is: Black57: TV shows you watch: Jane the Virgin, Sense856: Favorite web site: idk man youtube i guess55: Your dream vacation: I want to live a month in every country in the world54: The worst pain I was ever in was: im constantly in pain so idk man53: How do you like your steak cooked: i dont like steak52: My room is: a constant mess51: My favorite celebrity is: Idina Menzel or Aaron Tveit50: Where would you like to be: with my fp49: Do you want children: i cant take care of myself how would i take care of a child48: Ever been in love: im always in love47: Who’s your best friend: Lizzie46: More guy friends or girl friends: girl45: One thing that makes you feel great is: validation and physical touch from my fp44: One person that you wish you could see right now: Sebastian43: Do you have a 5 year plan: i dont even have a five minute plan my dude42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: no41: Have you pre-named your children: ive always loved the names eliza and sebastian40: Last person I got mad at: myself39: I would like to move to: upstate new york38: I wish I was a professional: broadway performer[ My Favorites ]37: Candy: swedish fish36: Vehicle: one that runs me over35: President: theyre all pieces of shit so34: State visited: new york33: Cellphone provider: fuck capitalism32: Athlete: serena williams tbh31: Actor: Aaron Tveit30: Actress: Idina Menzel29: Singer: Syd Matters28: Band: Andrew Jackson Jihad27: Clothing store: no26: Grocery store: giant25: TV show: sense824: Movie: The Way He Looks23: Website: youtube i guess22: Animal: dogs21: Theme park: no20: Holiday: christmas19: Sport to watch: no18: Sport to play: definitely no17: Magazine: no16: Book: Nimona15: Day of the week: Saturday14: Beach: Idk???13: Concert attended: I saw Paramore in concert and it was awesome12: Thing to cook: mac and cheese11: Food: mac and cheese10: Restaurant: a local diner9: Radio station: no8: Yankee candle scent: no idea7: Perfume: no6: Flower: lilies or tiger lilies5: Color: orange4: Talk show host: idk3: Comedian: idk2: Dog breed: idk1: Did you answer all these truthfully? yeah lmao   
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